#that girl advice | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sexy-celestial · 1 year

Text

November is:

studying, learning new things, passing all exams, skin-care, self-care, drinking lots of water, vitamins, workouts, pilates, and watching gossip girl.

3K notes · View notes

beegalactica · 2 months

Text

real 'glow up' advice i wish i had

Imagine getting to the point in life where YOU are your own vision board; where you are that girl who has the life that you want, and you don't have to seek it out through other people. That should be the ultimate goal.

Here are subtle things that you should be doing to channel your ideal person and improve yourself for the better FROM THE INSIDE

take care of your hygiene: brush your teeth every day, wash your face with soap, wash your hair, take meaningful showers

be kind to yourself: speak nicely to yourself, treat yourself every now and then, love yourself exactly the way you came

make the effort: do your hair and wear something cute, even if you're only going to the supermarket. I bet your ideal self looks stunning wherever she goes, so make that effort if you really want to become her

move your body: dance to some music for just 5 minutes, take a walk, get off the bus a (reasonable) few stops earlier and walk the rest of the way

romanticise the hell out of your life: wear those bows, create that vision board, play that aesthetic background music even if you're just washing the dishes, wear that outfit!!!!!

admire yourself: look at yourself in the mirror and remember what you look like, take a million selfies to look back and smile at, give yourself a compliment every time you pass your reflection

get creative: if you want cute decor, make it! if you want cute clothes, find some easy DIYs!

focus on what you can control: if you cannot change the situation, let it resolve itself. don't waste your precious time obsessing over something you cannot change

get to know yourself (again): rediscover your hobbies, try new activities, learn to appreciate your solitude, get out of your shell

I really wish I was part of a community like this when I was going through a really insecure and lonely phase of my life.

Instead of deciding to wake up a 3am every day from now on, and trying to reach 20k steps every day, start small and walk your way up to greatness!

#lifeblr #becoming that girl #girlblogger #girlblogging #it girl #self improvement #that girl #self care #journal #journalling #glow up #glow up tips #glow up era #mental health #advice #body image #self love

3K notes · View notes

wonnieaura · 4 months

Text

Getting your life back in 2024 (leveling up to the max)

♫₊˚.🎧✩｡

In 2024, leveling up your life involves a holistic approach to personal growth. Start by setting clear, achievable goals in various aspects of your life—career, relationships, health, and personal development. Cultivate a growth mindset, embracing challenges as opportunities to learn and improve.

1. **Define Your Goals:** Clearly outline what you want to achieve in different areas of your life. Break down larger goals into smaller, actionable steps.

2. **Continuous Learning:** Invest time in expanding your knowledge and skills. Read books, take courses, attend workshops, and stay curious about the world around you.

3. **Health and Wellness:** Prioritize your physical and mental well-being. Incorporate regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and sufficient sleep into your routine.

4. **Mindfulness and Self-Care:** Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce stress. Incorporate self-care rituals into your routine, ensuring you take time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation.

5. **Build Strong Relationships:** Cultivate meaningful connections with friends, family, and colleagues. Invest time in building positive and supportive relationships.

6. **Financial Literacy:** Improve your financial knowledge and habits. Set a budget, save, and invest wisely to secure your financial future.

7. **Career Development:** Set professional goals, seek opportunities for growth, and stay adaptable in the ever-changing job market. Network and build a strong professional support system.

8. **Embrace Change:** Be open to change and view it as a chance for growth. Adaptability is a key skill in navigating life's uncertainties.

9. **Time Management:** Organize your time efficiently. Prioritize tasks, minimize distractions, and create a schedule that allows for both productivity and relaxation.

10. **Gratitude Practice:** Cultivate gratitude by reflecting on the positive aspects of your life. This mindset shift can enhance your overall well-being.

Remember, the journey of leveling up is ongoing. Regularly reassess your goals, celebrate your achievements, and stay committed to continuous improvement. As you evolve and grow, you'll find that your life becomes more fulfilling and aligned with your aspirations.

#beauty #fashion #hyper feminine #light feminine #pink moodboard #pink pilates princess #soft moodboard #that girl #beautytips #confidence #2024 #leveling up #best version #girlblogger #girlblogging #blogger #pink blog #advice blog #study blog

4K notes · View notes

theambitiouswoman · 7 months

Text

Things You Can Control ✨✨

How you respond to others and situations.

Where you spend your time and who with.

The shows, books, news and social media you consume.

What you do with your free time.

What you say to others.

What you think about.

How hard you try.

What you allow or don't allow from others.

Good or bad routines you follow.

What you aim for in life.

Being positive or negative.

Eating, exercising, and resting.

Learning new skills or knowledge.

Who you hang out with.

What you buy and spend on.

Keeping your space clean or messy.

What fun activities you pick up.

Saying "thank you" and feeling thankful.

Knowing when to say "no" or "enough".

What you hope for and dream about.

Doing nice things for others.

Picking one thing over another.

What's most important to you.

What you do every day.

What you feel is true or right.

Taking time for yourself.

#personal improvement #personal growth #personal development #self help #self improvement #self confidence #self care routine #self care #level up journey #glow up tips #life advice #life goals #life quotes #becoming that girl #that girl #girlblogging

6K notes · View notes

femmefatalevibe · 10 months

Text

Femme Fatale Guide: Game-Changing TED Talks Everyone Should Watch

"How Five Simple Words Can Get You What You Want" by Janine Driver

"Master your Mindset, Overcome Self-Deception, Change your Life" by Shadé Zahrai

"How to talk to the worst parts of yourself" by Karen Faith

"Think before you speak, hacking the secret of communication" by Catherine Molloy

"The Hidden Code For Transforming Dreams Into Reality" by Mary Morrissey

"Don't Believe Everything You Think" by Lauren Weinstein

"The public speaking lesson you never had" by DK

"Programming your mind for success" by Carrie Green

"How to stop screwing yourself over" by Mel Robbins

"Own Your Behaviours, Master Your Communication, Determine Your Success" by Louise Evans

"The psychology of seduction" by Raj Persaud

"Why we're unhappy -- the expectation gap" by Nat Ware

"Think Fast. Talk Smart" by Matt Abrahams

"Increase your self-awareness with one simple fix' by Tasha Eurich

"5 steps to designing the life you want" by Bill Burnett

"Staying stuck or moving forward" by Dr. Lani Nelson Zlupko

"To reach beyond your limits by training your mind" by Marisa Peer

"Emotional laws are the answer for better relationships" by Diana Wais

"Feelings: Handle them before they handle you" by Mandy Saligari

"Cultivating Unconditional Self-Worth" by Adia Gooden

7K notes · View notes

malusokay · 30 days

Text

Learning to love yourself 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Celebrate yourself. Every accomplishment deserves to be acknowledged, no matter how big or small. Stop putting yourself down by thinking that you don't deserve to celebrate your achievements just because others have accomplished "greater things." Also, there is so much fun in hyping small wins; call your girlfriend, bake a cake, and enjoy yourself!!

Invest time in things that you love. Doing what makes you happy is essential for your mental health. It's so important to pursue one's small and simple pleasures without the intention of turning them into profit!!

Boundaries and relationships. Learn to say no, define and set boundaries, question your current relationships and friendships, and distance yourself from people who make you feel unloved or worthless.

Allow yourself to grow. Let go of the notion that you are undeserving of growth. Acknowledge the past for what it is, learn from it, and grow from it.

Refelct. Getting to know yourself deeply is key to self-love; journaling is a great way to reflect. Ask yourself questions, question your habits, observe how you respond in certain situations, etc...

Trust yourself and your intuition. Listen to yourself, and don't dismiss the small cues that your inner voice gives you!!

Care for yourself. It is not selfish to look after yourself. Start exercising, eat balanced and healthy, stay hydrated, educate yourself, read complex literature, consume media mindfully, prioritise your sleep and routines, care for your skin and hair...

Be patient. Self-love takes time; you must slowly unpack and unlearn past habits, confront uncomfortable thoughts and memories, and gain a deep understanding of yourself. Give yourself time and approach this as a journey to enjoy. <3

You guys ALWAYS ask about self-love and confidence, sooo I hope this can be a little helpful to some of you and as always, please feel free to share your own suggestions and tips in the comments!! ♡

love ya ･:*₊‧౨ৎ

2K notes · View notes

girlbloggerbby · 8 months

Text

Being your big sister pt²

You must change your pads every 4 hours at least, this avoids the accumulation of bacteria and diseases

Charcoal pills help to stop poisoning in your dog!

Never and ever wash your lace clothes in the washing machine please! I learned the hard way (ruined my favorite corset 😭)

Your armpits are dark and stained because you use spray deodorant, these sprays dry the area, prefer to use roll-on or cream deodorants that moisturize more

Never put out a pan on fire by throwing water! This will make it explode, throw a damp cloth over it and put out the flame, if you spilled boiling water or oil on your skin immediately go to the sink and rinse under running water for a few minutes before doing anything else

Wash your jeans stuff by hand and with neutral products because they fade easily

Mix your perfume in a moisturizer of the same fragrance (similar) or unscented and apply it to your body, this will enhance the fragrance and last longer on your skin

Magnesium pills are the holy grail for us anemic girlies, it boost our energy, help with fainting and migraines

Research more about connectives before writing an essay, learning to use new forms of connectives will diversify and increase the level of writing essays

Bathing in very hot water destroys your skin and hair by drying out and weakening it over time

Person is not happy with your achievement=stay away from these people and remove them from your life

That's it for the day and i hope i was of some help, luv y'all 🪽

3K notes · View notes

honeytonedhottie · 27 days

Text

general hygiene secrets + tips⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🍦

while u upgrade in other areas of ur life, its important to upgrade ur hygiene and self care game too ✨ and this post can help u do that

DOUBLE CLEANSING ;

not only for ur face but also for ur body, doing so makes me feel a million times cleaner. when i double cleanse my face i go in with an oil based cleanser then a water based cleanser.

my double cleansing body recommendations are the dove bar soap, african black soap or the soaps from the doctor bronners brand

for double cleansing my body i'll use an unscented/anti bacterial bar soap and after rinsing that off i'll use a liquid body gel or body wash that has the scent that i wanna smell like

MY TAKE ON UNSCENTED BODY PRODUCTS ;

i think that unscented body products r lowkey slept on but in that same breath i can kinda see why. personally, i like to use an unscented soap sometimes and then make my body smell even better by using a body butter or a lotion but thats SOMETIMES.

TAKE CARE OF UR FEET ;

use a foot file/foot scrub to ensure baby soft, barbie-esque feet. before bed time make sure to moisturize ur feet with a body butter ro vaseline and sleep with fuzzy socks on.

also keep ur toes clipped, filed, and preferably painted. personally i like to go for white toes cuz i just think its classic, but in general do NOT neglect ur feet.

ALL ABOUT FRAGRANCE ;

i love to collect different fragrances and buy a lot of perfumes bcuz i just love the variety, i love the adorable packaging i just LOVE perfume. dont be afraid to blend perfumes together and experiment with how different notes in different perfumes can work together and give u ur own unique scent.

dont sleep on oil perfumes either, personally i find them to be very rich and SO LONG LASTING?? they're absolutely amazing. when u apply the perfume try not to rub, instead press and apply it to ur pulse points.

HOT TIP - when spraying perfume on ur body, make sure to apply some onto the insides of ur knees + ankles bcuz smell travels upwards so when u walk by, the air will smell yummy 🎀

SLUGGING SECRETS ;

slugging urself before bed ensures that when u wake up ur body will be SOFT and SMOOTH and glowy. the basic before bed slugging routine is to go in with a deeply moisturizing body lotion/butter. ur gonna wanna lather urself completely (from the neck down to ur ankles) then use a body oil.

things to look for in a body lotion or body butter - helps with properties like firming and tightening of the skin. aids in deep moisture if ur someone who has dull or dry skin.

its important to find a body butter + oil combination that works well with ur skin and doesn't break u out (plus smells good)

1K notes · View notes

dearesmeray · 2 months

Text

Character Traits & Quirks (For Writers)

Peace and blessings upon everyone!

I hope life's treating you well. I’m Esmeray and I welcome you to this post on my blog Dear Esmeray.

Ever wondered what makes your OC truly unforgettable? I believe it is the character traits. Character traits are what bring a character to life, or else you just have a flat, one-dimensional everyman as your OC. So today I'll be sharing with you a list of character traits that I compiled to help you develop better OCs.

Positive Traits:

Agreeable

Brave

Caring

Cheerful

Confident

Cooperative

Creative

Dedicated

Devotion

Diligent

Disciplined

Dutiful

Easygoing

Efficient

Fairness

Forgiveness

Friendly

Funny

Generous

Hard-Working

Honest

Honorable

Humble

Kind

Leadership

Love of learning

Loyal

Passionate

Persuasive

Prudent

Principled

Punctual

Reasonable

Reliable

Respectful

Responsible

Self-regulation

Social Intelligence

Supportive

Trust-worthy

Well-mannered

Witty

Wise

Neutral Traits & Quirks:

Raises Eyebrows

Blinks rapidly

Avoids eye contact

Maintains eye contact

Blinks rapidly

Slouches

Stares off into the distance

Shrugs often

Touches their scars or wounds often

Chews lips

Paces around

Smiles a lot

Rarely smiles

Gestures with hands while speaking

Often is distracted

Hums

Negative Traits:

Absentminded

Abusive

Acts superior

Alcoholic

Aggressive

Always plays the victim

Aimless

Apathetic

Arrogant

Argumentive

Avoids their problems

Bossy

Blunt

Boring

Careless

Can't take criticism

Can't take a joke

Clumsy

Conceited

Controlling

Cunning

Childish

Cruel

Deceptive

Defiant

Demanding

Disloyal

Dishonest

Dramatic

Dependent

Disorganized

Disrespectful

Distracted easy

Extravagant

Envious

Forgetful

Greedy

Holds grudges

Makes up excuses for everything

Has a reason for why nothing is ever their fault

No accountability

Hostile

Hypopocrite

Immature

Impatient

Impractical

Impressionable

Impulsive

Insensitive

Irresponsible

Not a team player

Incompetent

Irritable

Inconsiderate

Indulgent

Insecure

Jealous

Know-It-All

Lazy

Liar

Loud

Manipulative

Makes everything about them

Makes everything a joke

Their way or the highway

Mean

Meddlesome

Messy

Naive

Nosy

Obnoxious

Obbssesive

Offended easily

Overdramatic

Overreacts

Patronizing

Power-hungry

Pretentious

Rebellious

Reckless

Rude

Sarcastic

Selfish

Sensitive

Stingy

Sexist

Spoiled

Stubborn

Superstitious

Talks over others/interrupts

Too loyal

Too forgiving

Undependable

Unreliable

Unsympathetic

Unorganized

Unreasonable

Violent

Weak

Remember, there are no one-dimensional characters in real life, and there shouldn't be in your stories either. The possibilities for your characters are endless – so get creative and have fun writing!

With Love, Esmeray ♡

1K notes · View notes

sexy-celestial · 1 year

Text

600 notes · View notes

xoxomireya · 3 months

Text

！ᶻz﹒the ultimate friendship guide﹒🦢﹕⤾

tysm for requesting @jasminejournal < 3 ! i had a lot of fun making this.

I. YOU CAN’T NATURALLY MATCH WITH EVERYONE

First things first: You can’t be friends with everyone. apart from the obvious “a friend to all is a friend to none”, it’s quite unrealistic to expect everyone to like you, and that’s okay! You just have to acknowledge that you aren’t meant to be liked by everyone.

Find people who are like-minded, who give you the same energy back, who have the same values, people that have healed and don’t bring their baggage and toxicity into the friendship. quality >>> quantity. Not everyone is meant for you and that’s okay, because we are not seeking quantity, we are looking for quality friends who have all the values i listed before and the ones you also find important.

The world is your oyster. in this era it’s easier than ever to make friends: meet a lot of people, say yes to plans, go to events, network, etc. The more people you meet the more you will realize that you can’t match naturally with everyone, some people are just not your vibe and the more people you meet the more likely you are to find someone you do mesh well together with. I completely understand that it might be harder for some people who are introverted or have social anxiety to socialize, but in that case I really recommend to work firstly on yourself because a lot of the times those things are triggered by insecurities and a bad relationship with oneself. I also recommend to practice with people online or people who know nothing about you, because that’s the thing: they know nothing about you. If you’re insecure, they don’t know that. If you’re acting in a confident way even though you’re not, they’re also not going to know because they don’t know the way you think or act.

Maybe the problem is YOU. Ifyou’re always losing friendships and struggling to maintain them, maybe the common denominator is you because you have issues you need to introspect. Focus on yourself for some time and fix all the issues that might be making you repel high-value people such as being insecure, romanticizing your sadness, having toxic and jealous behaviors…

II. WHERE AND HOW TO MEET PEOPLE

Like-minded communities !! You need to utilize the resources you have to make friends. friends that last are the ones who think in a similar way and who share similar values and interests, and you’re more likely to find like-minded people in like-minded communities. Build up the courage to go and do things alone so you become comfortable in going to places to meet people alone.

Some like-minded communities can be classes in which they teach hobbies of yours because when there’s a community of people whom you have to coexist with you will be forced to work together in a team and talk to each other and that will make it a lot more easier to make friends. Plus, you’re taking the same class so you’re going to have an interest/hobby to bond over which means automatic conversations without any awkwardness. Another option is to become a regular literally ANYWHERE. Ranging from a coffee shop to a gym, when you become a regular you familiarize with the staff and other regulars.

We’re living in an era in which technology can help you with almost anything. Use this to your advantage! Make online friends, use social media to search for like-minded people, download apps to make friends such as bumble bff…

III. HIGH-VALUE FRIENDS.

Now that you’ve prepared yourself and know where to find friends, let’s talk about how to know when someone is right for you.

Look for people who strive to be the best version of themselves and who are surrounded by positive energy. You are who you surround yourself with, so make friends that bring you positivity and who inspire you. Make sure that you both share how you want your future to look like and have similar future plans. Meshing well with them is a must. For example, someone who prefers and feels more comfortable having low maintenance friendships won’t match with someone who prefers to have high maintenance friendships.

And of course, respect is needed. You cross my boundaries? You’re out. Any sort of toxic or jealous behavior is NOT normal and you should not be friends or be influenced by that type of people.

IV. WHAT TO TALK ABOUT AND HOW TO BE A GOOD FRIEND.

Do NOT come off as desperate. “What if they don’t like me?” Thinking like that will only make you be so immerse in your thoughts that all of your confidence will disappear. Focus on having a “How can I make them feel comfortable and understood?” mindset, you’re now not thinking only about yourself and being self-conscious, so you’re going to appear more confident and since now you’re focusing on listening and making the other person feel comfortable you will make an amazing first impression.

Ask them questions about themselves. People love talking about themselves and this will immediately make them like you. Do not make it look like an interview, tho. Make sure you provide your input too which shouldn’t be hard because every question you ask is going to be redirected to you. You can also start the conversation with a compliment!

Friendship is a two way street. It needs to go both ways and you need to follow up with each other. What are they offering you? What are YOU offering them? Think about what can you give without forgetting what can you receive. The type of friend you want is the type of friend you need to be

V. HOW TO MAINTAIN FRIENDSHIPS

Everyone has the type of friendship maintenance they feel more comfortable with, but it's a fact that low-maintenance friendships are tho ones that last. Even if you feel more comfortable having high maintenance friendships, make sure that both of you can accomodate to having to maintain the friendship even when both of you are busy.

COMMUNICATION!!! I assure you that there's probably going to be a lot of hardships and misundersatings in your friendships (And that's not bad, we're human) and no proper communication will lead to the deterioration of the friendship.

2K notes · View notes

wonnieaura · 3 months

Text

THE IT GIRL MINDSET

The "it girl" mindset is all about embracing your individuality and exuding confidence and self-assuredness. Here are some steps in becoming the it girl you desire to be especially in 2024 🫶🏻

1. Embrace your individuality: Don't try to conform to societal beauty standards or compare yourself to others. Be true to who you are and celebrate your unique qualities.

2. Exude confidence and self-assuredness: Wear what you feel good in, speak with confidence, and hold your head up high. When you feel confident and assured, others will notice and respond in kind.

3. Focus on internal beauty: Take care of your mental and emotional well-being, and focus on being a good person. When you feel good on the inside, it shows on the outside.

4. Practice self-care: When you practice self-care and take care of yourself, you feel more comfortable in your own skin and exude confidence and self-assuredness.

5. Surround yourself with positive and supportive people: Seek out friends, family, and mentors who lift you up and celebrate your successes. Avoid negative and toxic people who bring you down.

6. Practice gratitude: Writing down and focusing on what you're grateful for can help shift your mindset and help you adopt an "it girl" mentality.

3K notes · View notes

onehundredwishesss · 3 months

Text

Type of friends you need in your life

• Confident friends : These friends will not see you as a competition because they love themselves.

• Healing friends : They did their inner work which means they are self-aware, which motivates you to be self-aware of you too

• Intelligent friends : Friends that seek knowledge because knowledge means power. The more you learn, the better.

• Positive friends : Friends that wants the best for you and who will motivate and support you. Friends that gives you the right mindset

• Real friends : Friends that tell you that you did something wrong but in a gentle way. Friends that hold you accountable for your actions.

#onehundredwishesss speaks #law of attraction #law of assumption #manifestation #manifesting #self love #loa #self confidence #affirmations #advice #friends #friendship #it girl #level up #girlblogger

1K notes · View notes

theambitiouswoman · 10 months

Text

Types of relationships that look like love but are not:

Infatuation: This is an intense emotional or sexual attraction to someone that can give the illusion of love. However, infatuation is often based on idealized perceptions rather than a deep emotional connection.

Codependency: Codependent relationships involve one person excessively relying on another for emotional or physical needs. This dependency can mimic love, but it is rooted in the need for validation, control, or a sense of purpose.

Unrequited love: This refers to a situation where one person has romantic feelings for another, but those feelings are not reciprocated. It may involve one-sided affection, longing, or an obsession with someone who does not feel the same way.

Limerence: Limerence is an intense and obsessive form of attraction characterized by intrusive thoughts, longing for reciprocation, and an idealized image of the other person. It can feel like love, but it often lacks a genuine emotional connection.

Conditional love: In relationships based on conditional love, affection and care are only given when certain conditions or expectations are met. This type of relationship lacks unconditional acceptance and can be manipulative or controlling.

Trauma bond: A trauma bond forms when two individuals share intense emotional experiences, often negative or abusive. Despite the harmful dynamics, there may be a strong attachment due to the shared trauma, leading to a mistaken perception of love.

Transactional relationships: These relationships are based on mutual benefit or convenience rather than genuine emotional connection. Partners may stay together for financial security, social status, or other practical reasons, rather than genuine love and affection.

Manipulative relationships: Manipulative relationships involve one person exerting control and power over the other through emotional manipulation, coercion, or gaslighting. The manipulator may feign love and affection to gain control or exploit their partner's vulnerabilities.

Fantasy relationships: In fantasy relationships, one or both partners create an idealized version of the other person, often based on unrealistic expectations or fantasies. The relationship may lack a true emotional connection, as it is based on the person's fantasy rather than the reality of who their partner is.

One-sided relationships: These relationships are characterized by an imbalance of effort, care, or emotional investment. One person may consistently give more while the other takes without reciprocation. It can create an illusion of love, but it lacks equality and mutual respect.

Love addiction: Love addiction refers to a compulsive or obsessive pattern of seeking out relationships and being dependent on the euphoric feeling of being in love. It can lead to a cycle of unhealthy relationships, as the person seeks constant validation and excitement without addressing underlying emotional issues.

5K notes · View notes

femmefatalevibe · 8 months

Text

25 Life Lessons I've Learned In 25 Years

In honor of turning 25 this month, here are some lessons I wish someone could've baked into my brain by 18. Hope this helps xx

Putting yourself first is not selfish, it is an act of self-care. Actively discounting others is not the same as protecting your peace.

Pay attention to who gossips and keeps to themselves amidst an interpersonal conflict. Insecure people or those in the wrong will speak the loudest and go on the longest in a fight to prove their innocence. Individuals who are self-assured and comfortable with the truth know it's better to communicate their feelings appropriately and then move past it. Confidence is assertive, tactful, and relatively silent.

If you want to know who to believe in an argument, pay attention to how both sides speak about the conflict. The perpetrator will often speak about the individuals' character/morality while the victim will explain their personal experience in the context of the relevant situation.

Display empathy and consideration, but don't live to satisfy others' emotional needs and expectations. Say farewell to anyone who dismisses or guilts you for your own needs, emotions, priorities/life goals & aspirations.

Your needs matter. No one needs to approve or validate your desires. If someone feels they have control over you or tries to persuade you to change your mind to ensure you put their emotions and needs first, cut them out of your life. They do not care about you.

Almost no one deserves insider access into your life and mind. Upholding your right to privacy – especially regarding your finances, dating life, health conditions/concerns, and long-term goals – is the simplest way to protect your peace.

A friend to all is a friend to none. Be wary of those who will not stand up for you behind closed doors. These people do not care about you, they care about what your place in their life does for them and their ego.

Be radically honest and accepting of who you are. Don't apologize for your preferences, aspirations, and values. You deserve to live in a way that makes you happy, not to appease others in hopes of their approval or future favors due to your karmic good deeds.

You deserve happiness, love, and nice things, life experiences, relationships, and opportunities in your life regardless of what others may or may not possess/ be able to experience. Dispel this scarcity mindset ASAP. Jealousy and internalized shame are destructive to your self-esteem and all your relationships.

You are worthy and offer many incredible, unique gifts to the world. Don't allow naysayers, critics, or bullies (of any age) to dim your light or sacrifice pursuing your dreams. Decide you're the leader of your own life. Then act accordingly.

Direct communication is always the way. Remain tactful, but at least when dealing with non-manipulative people, always say what you mean and mean what you say. It will save a lot of trouble and petty disagreements that could've been avoided with clearer communication.

You don't owe anyone an explanation for your feelings, emotions, and actions that don't have a direct, inescapable impact on someone else. "No" is a complete sentence.

Approach conversations as a meeting of the minds. Healthy debate or conflict is about seeking to understand the other person, not prove yourself right. Leaving your ego at the door will allow you to expand your mind and avoid many unnecessary conflicts or arguments.

If it's not a hell yes, it's a no. For a job, date, sex, attendance at a time-sucking social event, family gatherings, an informal meeting not essential for you to keep your job, a wedding, birthday party, holiday invitation, etc. Outside of your contracted hours and time necessary to keep yourself/your home clean & well-maintained, you should spend your time exactly as you please. Doing things you don't want to do will only breed resentment down the line toward yourself and others.

Detangle yourself from any who refuses to self-reflect and take accountability. This person is selfish and will never see you as fully human with emotions, needs, and a complete life/internal world of your own. Cut them out (or at least fully emotionally detach and limit contact with them) immediately.

Speak your truth, but always say a little less than you feel necessary. Overexplaning and oversharing do you no favors. At a minimum, this approach allows you to protect your peace. In the worst circumstances, this tactic can also save you from a lot of trouble in your personal or professional life.

Learn to ask for a little more than you're comfortable with, but do so with grace, tact, and confidence. Whether it's a salary/rate negotiation, flight/hotel/restaurant accommodations, get in the habit of making that slightly higher/up-leveled request like you're expecting a "yes." You can't get something you don't ask for, so speak up and show you know your worth. This habit can bring a lot of great opportunity into your life and builds up your confidence.

Everyone is on their own timeline and path. Don't compare yourself to others' credentials, job titles, relationship status, net worths, or jean sizes. Comparison is truly the thief of joy. Remaining envious of others only takes up the energy that could otherwise be used to elevate or enrich your life.

Become clear on your priorities, and remain diligent with your habits & routines. Set SMART goals. Implement healthy habits and rituals into your daily lifestyle. Be consistent with goal-supporting and wellness rituals (generous sleep schedule, healthful eating habits, daily movement/regular exercise, reading, task time-blocking, cleaning, and life/work admin schedule), so they become second nature. Help yourself by creating these default habits to ensure your brain is wired for success whether you're in an easygoing era or a stressful life season.

Stop seeing other people (especially other women) as your competition in your profession/dating life and within your platonic relationships. Use your immediate criticisms as a tool for self-reflection. Actively deconstruct the patriarchy in every aspect of your life. Other women coworkers, dating prospects, and friends are not your rivals nor individuals who should be evaluated based on their assertiveness, sexual history/appeal, relationship status, or desire to perform traditional maternal/domestic roles.

Understanding how to interact with others in a cordial, tactful manner is significantly more important than having everyone like you. Learn how to positively influence people without seeking approval. What other people think of us is none of our business. All we can do is show up as the best version of ourselves, and remain optimistic about a potential connection.

Acceptance, accountability, and consistent discipline are the holy trinity to creating a sustainable change that you can maintain for the long haul. There's no shame in starting from the bottom, but you need to be honest about where you're at, so you can create a realistic game plan/small behavior-changing habits that stack up over time to help you implement the radical change you're craving.

Let go of any internalized shame. Being the "good girl" does you no favors in life. Set a standard and expectation to be respected, not to be perceived as "innocent" or submissive – this is how you get taken advantage of in professional, platonic, and intimate relationships. Remain ravenous for respect. It's the only way to live life to the fullest.

24. Investing in your appearance is a form of self-respect. Wanting to look & feel your best and present yourself in the best light possible to others is not a superficial pursuit. Remain unwavering about your hygiene/beauty/grooming routines, deliberate styling choices, healthy eating & workout habits, and mindfulness of social graces. You're your #1 publicist, so act like it. Life is all about embracing satisfaction with a sprinkle of reputation management.

25. Be unapologetic about your financial ambitions, priorities, investments, savings goals, etc. Financial freedom IS freedom. The only way to change the system is to break it from the inside out. Leverage is everything. Allocate, and assert your (financial) power wisely.

3K notes · View notes

genderkoolaid · 3 months

Text

transmasc & butch people who make forcemasc kink content & fetishize masculinity you are our bravest soldiers & lou sullivan is smiling down at you from tranny heaven

#m.#always thinking abt that part of his pamphlet on ftm advice #abt how there ppl raised as girls who DO have FTM crossdressing kinks #theyre just not talked about & made to feel isolated #by fetishizing transmasculinization You Are Doing Your Part 👍

1K notes · View notes