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#tbh shouldn’t put to bad bitches against each other
arugulafriend · 3 years
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The final Pam walked so Alicina Dimitrsecu could run
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babyboibucky · 3 years
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The Match - Part 8
Pairing: CEO!Bucky x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 2.7k
Summary: You get a preview of what it’s like to be working with Mackenzie.
Warnings: I apologize as there is no smut in here lmfao but there is a stubborn Bucky lols
A/N: The jitters just never go away whenever I post a new part for this ajkcnjasncakjcnakj I find this part boring tbh but uhh things will start picking up again in the next part I promise
The Match Masterlist || MAIN MASTERLIST
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Bucky decided to push through with his partnership with Wilson Enterprises. It was a big one, so it definitely required the entire team's effort and perseverance. Apparently, this is the company's biggest, most major project yet so this was going to look really good in your resume. It would also provide you with more credibility to further excel in your career.
Except that Bucky actually hired a marketing consultant to take over the entire project as his revenge.
"Any questions? About the project or about Kenzie?" Bucky asked, standing in front of the conference room, next to Mackenzie.
You confidently raised your hand when no one else did. Bucky tilted his head, a tiny smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. He knew you were affected, of fucking course you were!
"Yes?" he called out.
You stood up and sighed softly, "I mean this in the most respectful way, Mister Barnes." you said, emphasizing his name. "But as the head of marketing, what exactly is my role here? Given that Mackenzie was hired to spearhead the marketing aspect of this project." you said, giving Mackenzie a passive aggressive smile.
"I don't want to overstep on some boundaries here, that's why I'm asking. I just want clarity, that's all." you said.
Bucky was about to respond when Mackenzie stopped him, grabbing his arm and squeezing it before taking over the floor. You narrowed your eyes at how her slender fingers were wrapped around Bucky's arm.
"Honey..." Mackenzie started. "There's nothing to worry about, this is a collaborative work between you and I. So think of yourself as my assistant, someone to help me out with the project." she responded.
Bitch.
"I'm not an assistant, Mackenzie." you said, smiling at her.
Mackenzie laughed, "I'm sorry, my bad. I shouldn't have used that term. Oops." she said. "Although, I believe I have more experience in this area so maybe consider me a mentor?" she suggested.
Bitch!
Bucky cleared his throat, "If you have certain ideas, you can discuss it with her. She is a consultant after all. Given her impressive experience in the field, I'm sure you'll learn a thing or two from her."
The meeting was wrapped up by noon and you simply couldn't wait to get yourself out of the conference room. You didn't feel like talking to Bucky anymore in all honesty, not after what he was doing. You knew this was just to spite you, get you to cave in first and give in to him.
All the more that you wouldn't, especially not when he actually used your job against you.
Everyone started rushing out of the conference room, ready to head out for lunch. As soon as you reached the doorway, you overheard the short conversation between Bucky and Mackenzie.
"Hey Bucky, we still up for lunch?"
-
The bathroom was empty when you stepped inside and thank god for that because you couldn't hold back your emotions any further. Tears gathered in the corner of your eyes, not because you were hurt. Fuck no, you were angry and frustrated. So fucking angry at yourself for getting into this mess, at Bucky for being such an entitled prick, at the entire world for plotting against you.
You groaned in irritation as you wiped away your tears, sniffing as you looked at yourself in the mirror.
You worked your ass off for this job, for your position. You risked your dignity when you let Bucky fuck you. You weren't going to let someone take that away from you.
You quickly fixed yourself when the door opened, followed by the loud clacking of someone's heels.
"Omg, are you crying?" Beverly gasped, rushing over to you.
You snickered, "No." you lied, "My eyes are itchy." you huffed out before noticing that Beverly was holding a sandwich in her hand.
"Why did you bring your sandwich here?" you curiously asked.
Beverly shrugged, "The pantry's full and the other girls don't exactly seem to like me...so..."
You shook your head and sighed, "Come with me, let's have lunch out. I need to get out of this fucking place anyway."
"Yay, omg! I knew you were nice! You're like, the only girl who actually talked to me nicely." Beverly said, tagging behind you as you exited the bathroom.
"Oh, there you are!" Mark called out. "I was looking for you. Wanna grab lunch? Oh...who's this?" he asked, noticing the blonde girl trailing behind you.
"I'm Beverly! I'm Sir James' new secretary." she introduced excitedly.
You sighed, "Don't ask me why." you said when Mark turned to you with a confused look, still not sure what happened to Bucky's previous secretary.
"So, lunch out? With Bev?" you asked.
-
You were completely zoning out during lunch despite the ongoing conversation between Mark and Bev, something about yoga? You honestly couldn't care less, not when you were feeling so conflicted about your current situation.
Would Bucky actually go that far just to get you back? Or does he actually hate you for saying no to him and is basically using his authority to make your life a living hell?
"So I heard about the new girl." Mark said, that snapped you out of your trance.
"Huh?" you asked.
"I find it weird for Mister Barnes to hire someone when you're here." Mark pointed out. "I mean, are you okay with that or..."
You snorted, "Fuck no. Look, I'm not gonna be the bigger person here. I was offended as fuck." you admitted.
"Yeah, it's super weird because she was hired through Tinder or something. Is that even legal?" Beverly pointed out as she scrolled through her phone.
You and Mark turned to her abruptly, "Tinder? Wait, what?" you asked.
Beverly chuckled, "I heard them talking this morning and Kenzie was like, 'It's so funny that we matched on Tinder and ended up doing business there you know' and I'm like omg Sir James has Tinder and I have one too but I never saw him there, bummer."
"Motherfucker." you hissed out.
Mark made a face, "Are you okay?" he carefully asked. "You've been really tensed since last week."
Apparently, Bucky never deleted his Tinder and have been swiping right on women. And that's how he met Mackenzie who just happened to be a marketing consultant. Now you were just furious, was he fucking her too? Has he been fucking other women this entire time?
"Hey, Bev..." you said, a plan hatching inside your mind. "Can I ask you a favor?" you asked nicely.
Beverly nodded, "Um duh, you're basically my office BFF now."
"If you ever hear Mister Barnes and Mackenzie talk about hmm, I don't know...something interesting. Maybe about the project...me 'cause you know, I'm the head of marketing and Mackenzie’s in the same field...let me know, will ya?" you asked.
Mark chuckled nervously, "I don't know what's going on but isn't that an invasion of privacy?"
"She's not going to eavesdrop, Mark. She'll just...listen closely." you explained.
"Bev might get in trouble if Mister Barnes finds out." Mark warned.
You waved a hand, "She'll be fine, Mark. She's his secretary, she has to know everything. Besides, I'm not going to let her get in trouble, if she does then I'll take care of it."
Beverly squealed in delight, "Omg, you are not my office BFF. You're like my office mom! You and Mark are literally my office parents." she said, lifting her phone up in the air.
"Selfie! This one goes to the 'gram." she said, taking a quick photo of the three of you.
She then proceeded to edit the photo while you and Mark continued eating lunch.
"Bev, you should really put your phone away and eat first. We have less than half an hour left for lunch break." Mark called out.
Beverly groaned and rolled her eyes, "Way to get into the role, Mark. You're such a dad."
You snorted, "Yeah. Loosen up, daddy." you teased.
"Playing family after just one date, huh."
Bucky's presence in the same restaurant should've really intimidated you, most especially that he just witnessed you tease Mark like that. But you were too mad at him to even care, what was the point even? He didn't believe you even when you told him the truth that Mark was just a friend.
Why even try now?
"Hi Sir James." Beverly greeted happily.
"Mister Barnes." Mark acknowledged.
Bucky ignored them and kept his eyes on you. You didn't falter under his gaze and simply stared back at him with blank eyes. It's as if a staring competition took place when the both of you merely looked at each other, neither of you looking away nor attempting to do so.
"How was that date last Friday, Jim?" Bucky asked, his eyes still trained on yours.
Mark made a funny face at the name that Bucky called him but shrugged anyway. Before he could even respond, you decided to answer on his behalf. If Bucky wanted to spite you, you'd give him a taste of his own medicine.
"It was actually great. We might go on another one this Friday." you said.
"We are?" Mark asked in a whisper.
Bucky's hand landed on Mark's shoulder, "Don't count on it, Andrew. She's going to be doing a lot of work on Friday due to the project." he said through gritted teeth.
You shrugged, "Oh, but I thought Mackenzie's doing all my work?"
"I'm ready to head back, Buck."
Speak of the devil herself. Mackenzie weaved through the tables and approached Bucky, her face brightening up when she saw you, Mark and Beverly.
"Oh, hey you." she greeted you. "Look, I think we may have started off on the wrong foot earlier. I'm not here to take your job, just here to spice things up a bit. Improve your ideas, give Bucky some assistance." she chuckled, holding onto Bucky's arm yet again.
You fought back the urge to grab your glass of water and throw it at her face. As the saying goes, kill them with kindness. So you merely shrugged and extended an arm for a handshake.
"Of course. I would love to improve your ideas as well, you know. Just a healthy discourse between two marketing professionals. We good?" you said.
Mackenzie forced out a chuckle and reached for your hand, "We’re good. I look forward to working with you." she said before turning back to Bucky who was still gazing at you.
"Let's go?" she asked sweetly.
Bucky smirked at you before wrapping an arm around Mackenzie's waist, guiding her out of the restaurant the same way he did to you. You were too focused on Bucky's body language around Mackenzie that you failed to notice that Mark was watching you closely, your expressions and how you reacted towards Bucky.
"I think I know what's happening."
-
"You what?!"
"Shhh!" you hushed Mark and peeked out of the empty pantry to make sure the coast was clear.
Mark noticed the tension between you and Bucky and he came to a conclusion that the both of you dated at one point. He wasn't really wrong but he wasn't right either. So you decided to tell him everything, from the moment you matched with Bucky on Tinder until your last conversation with him last Saturday.
"I honestly thought you were dating, I didn't know there was sex involved. No wonder he had been calling me weird names." he said incredulously. "Was that you and Mister Barnes that Janet reported to the HR?" he asked, stifling his laughter.
You groaned, "Yes. Ugh, gave me a panic attack when I found out about that incident report." you said.
"Hey..." Mark called out. "Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me this. Your secret is safe with me." he reassured.
You nodded, "I think it was about time that I told someone about us anyway. This whole situation is driving me crazy and I don't know what to do next. And I'm sorry for dragging you into this mess, I shouldn't have said that we were going out again. I don't want you or your job getting compromised because of our petty fight." you exhaled.
You had to admit, you felt so much better now after confiding with Mark. It somewhat alleviated the weight on your shoulders, knowing that there was someone aware of what you were going through. Who would've thought that this person would end up being Mark? You did have friends outside of work of course, but you felt like they all wouldn't really understand the situation.
Half would hate you for rejecting Bucky and the other half would hate you for even swiping right on him.
"Do you mind an unsolicited advice?" Mark asked.
"Not at all." you said.
"Ignore him. Don't let him or Mackenzie get to you. Do what you do best, you're great at your job and you'll be fine. That might get him to realize that you're not a prize to be won. And if he still doesn't see that, then that's his loss. You're more than just that hot marketing girl at work." Mark said.
You laughed at his last statement, "Hot marketing girl at work?" you asked, shaking your head.
"It's true. So if in any case you decide to ditch the CEO and move on, you know where to find me." he joked, throwing a wink your way.
-
You wanted to finish all your reports so you could focus on the huge project so you decided to work until around nine in the evening. The floor was already empty by the time you were done. Bucky seemed to be working too, given that he was still replying to e-mails at this hour. Wanting to get all the reports over with, you decided to submit it to him before going home.
During the elevator ride to Bucky’s floor, you couldn’t help but wonder whether he was alone in the office. Would Mackenzie be there with him? Even at this hour? Your grip on the folder tightened at the thought of catching them in the act.
But did you have any right to feel this way though?
Brushing off the thoughts, you exhaled loudly and prepared yourself for whatever it was you were to witness. Upon reaching the door to Bucky’s office, you slightly turned your head to listen to anything. It was quiet. No hushed whispers nor strained grunts-- they weren’t fucking, thank goodness for that.
You decided not to knock and just walk inside like you used to, reminding yourself of Mark’s advice.
Don’t let Bucky get to you.
When you saw Bucky hunched over his desk, typing away on his e-mails instead of bending a certain brunette somewhere in his office, you had to admit that you were relieved. He looked up and his eyes looked dead tired, you almost felt sorry for him. Almost.
“You should really learn how to knock.” Bucky called out, slamming his laptop shut.
“Look, Bucky. I was just rushing to submit these reports so I can go home.” you explained and placed the folder on top of his desk.
Bucky frowned, “I said to call me Mister Barnes.”
You huffed out, “I honestly don’t care, Bucky. I’m not playing your damn games anymore.” you said and turned around.
A hand on your arm pulled you back, harshly turning you around to face Bucky. He was fuming, as usual. At this point, you were no longer fazed.
“You think I don’t know what you’re trying to do?” he asked.
You clenched your jaw and pulled your arm back, “I’m not doing anything. You bring in Beverly or Mackenzie or whoever it is that you have up your sleeve. I don’t fucking care. I just want to focus on work.” you said and stepped away.
“And you should too, Bucky.” you added.
“I don’t believe you.” he said.
You sighed, your shoulders dropping from exhaustion at this whole shenanigan. “I’m done, Bucky.”
And with that you turned around to exit his office, leaving Bucky unsure whether you truly meant what you said. A victorious smirk graced your lips as you walked back to the elevator.
You were far from done.
-
The Match Special Tags:
@marvelslag​​ @weird-mumbling​​ @propertyofpoeandbucky​​ @lostinthoughtsandfeelings​​ @mostly-marvel-musings​​ @squishybabies​​ @megzdoodle​​ @suchababie​​ @annathesillyfriend​​ @xhollycowx​​ @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​​ @5-seconds-of-mendes​​ @gogolucky13​​ @countonthesun​​ @iloveshawnieboi​​ @learisa​​ @borikenlove​​ @scarlet-natasha89​​
Everything Bucky Tag List:
@ddowii​​ @jessou893​​ @stealapizzamyheart​​ @bagelofthelord​​ @mxnt​​ @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @jeeperky​​ @ohladymacbeth​​ @wildflowergubler​​ @supraveng​​ @twinerd14​​ @buckysmar @bakugouswh0r3​​ @sweetcoldharmony @wintersfilm​​ @charminivy​​ @amelia-song-pond​​ @iamvalentinaconstanza​​ @mcubqrnes @im-squished​​ @tcc-gizmachine​​ @sipsteacasually​​ @prettyintopeerpressure​​ @weloveyasmin​ @est19xxshit​ @bloodhon3yx​ @dressed-in-prada​ @lizette50​ @thatfangirl42​ @sunflowerbunny2​ @unmagically​ @okiegirl24​ @sugarpunch-princess​ @enlyume​ @vvipgotbb @slimeyderp​ @lyoongx​ @just-deka​ @nobody-will​ @jaziona92 @elisebuitron​ @dpaccione​ @suvikamahes98blr​ @buckybarneshairpullingkink​ @earthtonav @x-judyjude-x​ @nani-kenobi @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @belladonnabarnes​ @iloveangstposts​ @weenersoldierr​ @asemistablehundredyearoldman​ @reidbuck​ @lizzarooni​ @girlfriday007​ @bonkywobble​ @lost-in-the-stars03​ @its-yasbxtch​ @whoth3hellisbucky​
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hebescus · 3 years
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besties! guess what? another fic recs!!
russian roulette (l/light, beyond). i'm a sucker for an AU crime rom-com fics. this is just *chefs kiss* i knew i'm going to love it when i first read the desc. and look, L and B rebel against Wammy!! Nobody's doing the detective job in here, L is a hitman, Light is an artist and BB is a bad bitch. Sadly discontinued when the story just began, but it's fun while it last. Like i said it's only early in the story when it ends so you won't be devastatingly emotionally attached.
for all the planets in the galaxy, and all the stars in the sky (l/light). this shit deserve more love than it gets, like seriously. this! is just soo good let me tell you. worldbuilding? plot? characterization? feels? immaculate! i mean come on, space au have the best fics and i have never seen any lawlight in it before so check this out!!!
our (im)perfect family (l/light, wammy's kids). listen listen, listen!!! l and light adopting mello, matt, and near and their shenanigans and become one family? COME ON. this is just really wholesome, near is such a baby (literally), and idk this shit just warms my heart.
from the cradle (l/light, mello/near). yep, we're still in the light and l parenting program in here. this time they got a kid of their own, plus a bit of meronia too. idk why i avoid reading this for the longest time when actually this is the kind of fics that's just so fun that made you pause reading every now end then, stalling the fact that it's going to end.
bus ride (matt/mello). no thoughts, head empty, just them. in a bus. being in love with each other. that simple, that clear.
no, i love you more (l/light) god i really like this. they're such horrible simps i love it. competitive bastards they are. the last answer,,,,,god
these velvet rims (near/mello/matt, mentioned l/light). in! fucking! love! au where they survive and happy, finally and visiting everyone's grave and very implied lawlight in a beautiful way that inspired me to make my own fic. good food.
the masterpiece of l lawliet (l/light) i barely remember what is this about tbh, this rec is a draft from weeks ago idk what makes me put this in here put it's good. trust me.
something wicked this way comes (l/light) okay okay- let me get this straight. au? check. roomates au? it's there. interesting plotline? absolutely. just so damn cool in general? yep. fake dating? everyone's favorite. discontinued literally in the moment where it all begins? sadly. but no worries! even tho i was crushed when it ends i really love this. seriously it took me too long to begin this one, it's the first tab of the uncountanble ':D' in my browser. so finally reading it is an accomplishment.
fidgeting. no thoughts head empty heart warm. this author is my beloved.
a sour bread (l/light). just read it. it still haunt me until now (in a good way? idk i have a lot of feelings) but it's really good. thinking abt it too much makes me kinda sad though.
matsuda shouldn't be a detective (matsuda, l/light). matsuda, as usual being a lovable idiot. i absolutely love this. it's really fun to read, something i can really enjoy in times like this. very reccomended.
chocolate cheesecake (l/light) we love a good coffee shop au right? and a sprinkle of college au light, my favorite thing (mentioned roomate misa too!!!). it's simple and calm. i like the aesthetic and vibes that i feel in this. and like a lot of these kind of au, i want to meet someone this way lol.
i haven't read that much lately. i ran out of fics and the fic contents i'm capable to read gets even fewer. it's frustrating tbh, please give me a good fic recs. anyway these are all amazing things! go check them out
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oligbia · 3 years
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Hello, can I get a short fic a/b reader who's dating Deku, but both are unaware that Bakugou likes reader also? Reader isn't a fan of Bakugou and always complains to Deku about how he kisses his ass too much and lets him get away with ish. Reader is definitely more sensitive/indignant than Deku tbh.
*ahem* this took embarrassingly long. But,, here. I like it <3
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Bakugou X Reader X Deku
SFW, mild angst
Contains: yelling, insults, implied self harm *briefly at the end, very vauge*, bakudeku if you squint, references of suicide *in refrence to middle school Deku*
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    Katsuki Bakugou was not jealous. Bakugou was confident and was going to be a top hero, and top heroes didn’t have time to be jealous. And, above all that, he was not jealous if stupid Deku. 
    Sure, maybe he was mad that dumb Deku got a partner before he did, but it wasn’t personal. Bakugou definitely didn't think about you. He didn’t think about the way your hands would look in his, the way it would look when his much larger arm rested around your waist. He didn’t think about sparring with you all the time, the way your body would look glistening in sweat as you cave him all you had. He only thought about sparring with you because he wanted to kill you, you were just another extra… right?
    But you were soft, delicate even. But, you also were assertive, not all peppy like the other girls. You were always looking for a fight. You wanted to protect people, not just save them. You weren’t afraid to kick Mineta in the balls (both sets), and you weren’t afraid of hero work. You never hesitated to jump into the fight. You were heroic- worth Bakugou’s time. 
It made sense you would like Deku more than him, it made sense Deku would get you. Deku was going to be a pro hero too, and with the way All Might dotes after him, he would be a hell of a hero too. Deku was smart, he was kind, and he was a decent fighter. He was everything that Bakugou wasn't. 
Because to you, Deku was a hero. He was going to save the world one day. But Bakugou was just a villain who managed to fool everyone into letting him be a hero. To you, Deku was kind and caring; Bakugou was just loud and violent. When Deku was emotional, Bakugou was just loud. He was a prick to you, and he knew it-and that destroyed him. 
***
“Hey Kacchan! Come hang out with us tonight!” Deku stood over Bakugou's desk, freckled face glowing as he smiled. Bakugou noticed your presence behind Deku. You were trying to hide your annoyance, Bakugou noticed. 
“No way would I ever hang out with you losers.”
Kirishima grabbed Bakugou’s shoulders, squeezing him playfully. “C’mon Bakugou! It’ll be fun.”
“Fuck off, shitty hair. I’m not going.”
Deku looked defeated. You knew how badly he wanted to hang out with Bakugou again. You didn’t see why of course- Bakugou was a jerk and wasn’t worth your boyfriend’s time. But, alas, you would do anything for the green haired boy.
You gave Bakugou a side glance, “Everyone is going- it would make you lame if you were the only one who missed.”
Bakugou looked at you, both angered and intrigued. “Huh? What did you say to me?” He rose from his seat, leaning around Deku to see you closer.  You looked him in the eyes, not intimidated or threatened. Deku looked vaguely panicked next to the both of you.
“I said you would look like the class loser to skip. It’s just a group hang out, Kacchan.” You teased his nickname, knowing it would set him off. 
Bakugou tried to leap forward to you, sparks setting off from his hands. “Shut up, dumb bitch!” 
You were about to hit him first, before Deku grabbed you to hold you back, his large arms containing you. Kirishima held down Bakugou, having to harden his arms to hold the explosive boy back. 
Deku drug you off somewhere, whispering in your ear in an attempt to calm you down. Kirishima sat Bakugou down. “Dude, you have to accept that she doesn’t like you.”
Bakguou rolled his eyes, looking out the classroom window. He knew you didn’t but he wasn’t going to accept it. 
“You have to move on. It isn’t manly to fight a girl.”
“It’s plenty okay to fight her, she started it!” Bakugou sat down in his seat, mumbling angrily. “and I don't like her- she's just as shitty as all of you extras.” 
Kirishima looked Bakugou up and down, seeing through his bullshit. “Whatever you say, bro.”
Bakugou let out a ‘tch’, thinking back at your interaction. He never wanted to actually hurt you, maybe playfully rough you up, but not genuinely hurt you. He never meant to yell at you either, you clearly preferred softer guys anyway. 
***
“You really shouldn’t fight Kacchan so much-”
You snapped your eyes to Midoriya, blood still boiling. “And why is that?”
“He didn’t do anything.”
“He did everything. He’s a jerk.”
“He’s going to be a hero just like us, Y/N, one of the best-”
“Not with the way he treats people. He’s going to be a shitty hero-”
“Don’t say that. You don’t know Kacchan the way I do.” Midoriya tried to reach for your hand, but you swatted it away. 
“Do you even know him? He bullied you in middle school and was never really your friend as a kid. Honestly, Izuku, I don’t know why you kiss his ass so much, he will never respect you back and is always going to make your life, everyone’s life, hell.”
Midoriya’s jaw dropped at your words, unsure of what to do. You had never been this mad at him, or at anyone. Small fits of anger were a normal occurrence for you, but normally a minute alone and a kiss to the forehead would put you at ease- but this was beyond Midoriya. 
You crossed your arms, walking away from Midoriya. He ran behind you, trying to catch up. 
“Wait, Y/N, you can’t just leave.”
“Yes I can. I can’t be around that blond headed shit stick anymore or I’ll fight him.”
“You would win-”
“Don’t kiss my ass now, Midoriya.”
Midoriya looked to the ground. He really wanted to support you, but he also knew that he respected Kachan. To him, Bakugou was a hero, someone he looked up to. Bakugou was powerful, his quirk was amazing. He had the talent and skills to become a hero. He was someone who demanded authority and respect, he was a talented hero. He was amazing. 
“I’m sorry, just don’t go yet-” he peaked up at you, your body leaning against the wall, head in hands. 
“I won't go anywhere.”
“Good. Perfect.” Midoriya walked to you, pulling you into his chest, wrapping his arms to rest on your waist. He placed soft kisses on your hairline. 
“I’m sorry I got mad.” Your voice was not much more than a mumbled, muffled in his shirt. 
“It’s okay. I’m sorry Kacchan doesn’t listen.”
You tensed, aggravated Midoriya just wasn't getting it. 
“Why do you respect him?” You peeled back, looking up at him. Midoriya’s arms stayed firm around your waist. “To me, he just seems mean. I mean, the kid bullied you your entire life. He told you to kill yourself ‘Zuku. Why do you keep pining after him?”
Midoriya blinked. “I don’t know. I just think hes going to be a great hero, and I admire that.”
You let out a defeated sigh. “So is Todoroki, and he’s nice to you!”
“I do respect Todoroki-”
“Not as much as you respect Bakugou.”
Midoriya stayed silent. You were right, he just didn’t agree with you. He was someone of reason who tried to work his way through things logically, but your view of Kacchan didn’t make sense to him. Yea, he was sort of loud and abrasive, but that was just one of those things about him, like how Todoroki is blunt and Iida is controlling. It wasn’t bad, it was just part of him. He knew that he didn’t have the best relationship with Bakugou in the past, but things can change; people can change. It was all water under the bridge now. You were all going to be heroes soon, none of that middle school stuff mattered, not to Midoriya anyways. 
“Let's just go back to class. We can worry about this later.” You started to pry yourself out of Midoriya’s grasp, his arms only pulling you in closer to him. 
“Thank you for trying to listen to me. I promise Kacchan wont lash out to you again, okay?” 
You nodded, not really believing him. Most of the time, you were the one who pissed Bakugou off first anyways. Midoriya placed a chaste kiss to your lips, letting his hands fall from your waist to find your hands. He placed a small kiss to your knuckles, watching your grow pink with the familiar blush he loved to see. 
***
Bakugou watched Deku kiss you, his arms holding you close. It made him sick. You should have been in his arms, his hand on your waist, his lips on yours. His hands tightened into fists, small burns forming on his own palms. He knew he wasn’t what you wanted, he knew you weren’t ever going to like him, but he couldn't stop pining after you. He couldn’t stop daydreaming about you, how he would treat you, the places he would take you. 
When you walked back into the room with Deku, both of you avoided his traveling gaze. You shot him a fast glare before Deku could usher you both back to your seats next to each other, Iida immediately lecturing you. 
It was the first time you saw Bakugou without his angry scowl, but rather, a sad frown. 
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shuahoonie · 3 years
Text
holidays with tom [tom holland]
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PAIRING: tom holland x female!reader 
SUMMARY: life isn’t exactly back to normal. with another lockdown in place and the holiday season is vastly approaching, you and tom are stuck in quarantine with each other the problem? there was supposed to be at least 5 of you in that house and tom is the last person you want to be with. shouldn’t be too bad right? 
WARNINGS: in no particular order swearing—err foul language lmao, sexual innuendos, things get heated but not that much??? exuding sexual tension but also fluff??? alcohol consumption, a series of bad decisions??? idk writing this made me experience the 5 stages of grief tbh lmao it’s not that bad I promise lmao
WORD COUNT: 6.9k! 
A/N: hello and happy new year! I was supposed to post this during Christmas Day but guess who got into a writing rut—yet again. I didn’t want to abandon this because I actually had fun writing it. I hope you all had a festive and safe holiday. I know things have been hard but I still hope you guys enjoyed the holiday. 
2020 has finally came to an end and we’re all ending it the same way when the pandemic started—staying at home, hopefully following the appropriate health measures. I can only hope that 2021 is a brighter and hopeful year for all of us.
stay safe, sending u all my love. 
gif credits: @underoos-shield​ 
vanessa’s masterlist | taglist form 
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Two hours. It’s been two hours since you found out that you were going to spend your holidays alone. You were aware that you weren’t going to spend your holidays with your family as you normally would, embracing the fact that working in a different country whilst in the middle of a pandemic was going to be challenging. 
Working in the film industry, constantly visiting sets while still living in a pandemic means that you threw away your chances of being home for the holidays. However, you weren’t entirely the only one who shares a similar struggle. 
“We should still do something for Christmas, you know,” Tom muttered as he watched you lay down on the sofa, your head is supported by the armrest. 
See—it should’ve been you, Ophelia, Alex, William, and Tom in that AirBnB, not just you and Tom.
The five of you reside abroad, however, you all had to fly to Los Angeles for work. You all collectively knew that it would be irresponsible to fly home for the holidays and it wouldn’t make any sense as you would all fly back for work anyway. 
The five of you had a brilliant idea of renting an AirBnB for the holidays since you were all in each other’s personal and work bubble anyway. Obviously, the three of them bailed as they’ve decided to stay with their partners instead, leaving you and Tom alone—which is the last thing you’ve wanted. 
“There’s just us two, Tom,” You replied as you sent a lengthy text to Ophelia, telling and reminding them about what happened between you and Tom.  “I’m not entirely sure if it’s worth anything if we did plan on doing something remotely festive.” 
There are four more days till Christmas and if you were being honest, the last time you felt festive was on the 18th of December...of 2019.��
“Surely there’s something we can do, right?” Tom’s optimism still shined beneath him. “This year has already been shitty enough, we don’t need to feed more into that.” 
The three dots bubble immediately popped up on your message thread with Ophelia as soon as you sent your passive-aggressive rant. Your focus was now on your phone. 
Suddenly, Tom’s face appeared on top of yours—his face was definitely close enough that it’s not CDC approved. He was standing on side of the sofa, both of his palms planted against the armrest as he loomed over you. 
“What do you and your family do during Christmas?” He dared to ask as if he wasn’t towering over you.
Your eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. “Uh—give each other personal space?” You answered out of sheer reflex. You always had a problem with keeping your mouth shut, especially when it sounds rude to other people. In your defence, being unable to do so has helped you put people back in place. 
To be fair, you were used to people standing at least 6 ft away from you ever since the pandemic started. 
Tom’s cheeks went bright red. “’m sorry,” He apologized, giving you a shy smile and scratched the back of his neck. You muttered a quick apology too, for acting so rashly. 
You rose from your position and sat upright instead. “Well, we never do anything special during Christmas,” You said as you threw your hair into a bun. “We usually just go to the movies on Christmas Day because that’s the only thing you can do back when life was normal.” 
Tom nodded understandingly as if he was taking this into account. Now you were curious. 
“Do you guys do anything special for Christmas?” You asked him. 
“Well, on Christmas Day, we would usually just lounge around the house and use it as a chance for me and my family to catch up,” Tom replied. “However, on Christmas Eve, my mum always made sure my brothers and I would have this scavenger hunt to look for our gifts—It’s really fun, actually.” Tom smiled sadly. 
You could easily see how Tom was genuinely broken about not being able to be around his family over the holidays. Heck—he really just misses his family. But who wouldn’t? Britney Spears didn’t sing the line “my loneliness is killing me” for nothing. 
“I’m sorry,” was all you could say. Aside from biting your tongue, being able to easily comfort people was one of your weaknesses too. 
“Oh, there’s nothing to be sorry about, darling.” Tom quickly dismissed the genuine heartbreak he was trying to hide. “We’re all making sacrifices and we chose to be responsible for the benefit of other people.” 
“Yeah, I know.” You said softly. “We’ll just try our best to make something out of this holiday season. I mean—we have to or else we’ll welcome 2021 with a fresh face of misery.” 
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“I’m sorry!” Ophelia pouted at the screen as they mindlessly walked around their partner’s place, something that most people do when they’re on the phone with someone. “I genuinely forgot about what happened between you and Tom.” 
“Well, Ollie, it seems like you weren’t the only one.” You replied, adjusting your glasses. Tom seems to be genuinely fine around you, no awkward tensions or anything. If anything, it’s just you who feels weird around him. “But I guess that’s a good thing right?” 
Ophelia forced a smile but they couldn’t, for the life of them, say anything about it. 
“Oh my god,” You sighed “Seriously, Ollie?” 
“It’s just—how could he forget?! You were literally on top of him as I recall and that very much left a permanent image on my mind. I—You know, I really tried my best to forget that ever existing in my mind. So really, if anything, it’s your fault.” Ophelia rambled on. 
“I—I wasn’t on top of him. That’s absurd! I was merely pressed against him” You said defensively, in which Ophelia just laughed atrociously. “Why am I friends with you again?!” You asked rhetorically, bewildered by the fact that you two lasted this long. 
“First of all, that is a hate crime. Second, I’m cool—like everyone wants to be my friend and you should be glad that I gave you the privilege to be even on a nickname basis as me.” 
You rolled your eyes at them. Despite the never-ending banter, you were grateful to have Ophelia as your friend. 
“But seriously, Y/N,” Ophelia said, “You can always just stay with me and Ericka. She’ll be glad to have you over for the holidays.”
“Ollie, as much as I love spending time with you two—I can’t stand being a third-wheel, especially when it comes to the both of you. You two are inseparable when you’re together.” You replied. “I appreciate the offer though.” You smiled at her. 
“I’m just saying—” Ophelia replied, shrugging her shoulder. “Unless you and Tom really want to have the house by yourselves.” They sang teasingly.
“Ophelia!” You gasped. 
“What?” They feigned innocence. “I gave you an option to stay with us! Plus, I know Alex and Will are would’ve asked you to stay with them if they had any idea what happened between you two.” 
“I can’t leave him!” You started to whisper “Tom seems genuinely bummed being here. I can’t just do that to him.” 
It’s as if a light came on inside them. Ophelia started to smirk and you recognized that smirk from anywhere. For christ’s sake, their eyes twinkled like Christmas lights. It drove you nuts. “I fucking knew it.” 
“What?” 
“You like him don’t you?!” They teased, but all you could do was blush. 
“I do not!” You denied it as you could still feel the burning heat emitting from your cheeks. 
“His tongue is that good huh?” Ophelia decided to pry even further. They clearly find enjoyment as you squirmed your way out of this conversation. 
“Bitch, I am ending this call.” That was all you could say. Even if you did find a smart retort, it was no use, especially with Ophelia. They can see right through you and there’s no point in trying to hide it. 
“Honestly, Y/N, we’re living through a pandemic. If there’s any time to make any rash decisions, it’s now. Go get that dick, bih—” 
You drowned out whatever Ophelia was trying to say with your goodbyes and proceeded to end the call. The one time you asked your friend to be serious and they come up with this. 
So—what really happened with you and Tom? 
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It was two years ago. You were at a party that you didn’t even plan on attending. However, you were dragged by Ophelia and their partner, Ericka—your new friends in the area. You couldn’t say no to them, they were your first friend in LA! 
You thought about it though, saying no. But when you got a message from your friend back in Canada sending a photo of your boyfriend ex-boyfriend (the same guy who had ghosted you ever since you moved to LA), swapping spits with another girl, you suddenly had the strong urge to drink until you die of alcohol poisoning.
You were burning with anger that you really felt tears pricking your eyes. You were so close to crying or punching someone—whichever comes first.  
One thing’s for sure, though, you weren’t going to cry over a man. So what did you do? “Ophelia, where’s the booze?!” You asked your friend whose eyes nearly popped out of their head. 
Well, you weren’t really going to punch a stranger. Though you felt this burning sense of violence, it’d be much more satisfying to punch the living daylights out on your ex. 
“Y/N, honey, are you alright?” That line always puts on the waterworks, no?  Ophelia was clearly concerned about your newfound thirst for alcohol. 
You furiously wiped the tears off your face. “Um just found out my boyfriend—er ex-boyfriend, who stopped talking to me as soon as I moved here, is seeing someone else now? I don’t know, am I allowed to feel angry when I don’t even know if we’re still together as soon I moved? Fuck—” You tried to explain as you wiped every tear that left your eyes. 
“Oh—of course, hon.” Ericka who handed you a drink. You weren’t exactly sure what it is, but you knew it has alcohol in it and that’s all that matters. You gulped the entire thing and you wanted more. “Y/N, you need to slow down.”
“Are you sure you want to stay? I mean we can crash at our place, eat take-outs, watch movies and be totally disconnected from the world.” Ophelia suggested, but you shook your head furiously. 
“No, I—I’m ok.” You answered “I can’t let the both of you be stuck in misery with me. I need this. I’ll get drunk and if I'm up for it, I’ll hook up with someone. It’s not a healthy coping method but I really want this night to be a series of bad decisions. I don’t want to be myself, even just tonight.”
 So that’s what you did. You were going from one drink to another in record time. Both Ophelia and Ericka kept an eye on you, just in case someone tried to take advantage of your drunken state. 
You were talking to some guy you met in the kitchen, one thing led to another and next thing you knew, you were making out with this dude in someone’s bathroom. Ophelia and Ericka were drunk enough to pester the guy you were making out with but not drunk 
As you were propped on top of the sink and your legs wrapped around his waist, you felt every bit of his lips explore the side of your neck as his hands explored every inch of your body. With his hand under your shirt and his fingers tracing every part of your skin, it just reminded you of how lonely you were. 
Here you were, a thousand miles away from home, all alone just so you could do the one thing you really love. Your family would sometimes call to check up on you but it just wasn’t the same. Your ex tried to guilt you into staying in Canada, but you couldn’t do that. You love what you do and you love yourself too. 
You were willing to risk everything, even if happiness came at a price. 
Now you were crying, and the guy you were making out with definitely noticed. 
“I’m sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?” He asked as he pulled down your shirt. 
“No—no, I’m just—” You tried to calm yourself down. “I’m not sure if I want to do this anymore.” 
“That’s alright,” He mumbled wiping the tears off your face. “Do you want to talk about it? You seem rattled.” 
“It’s just I’m so tired of pretending everything is alright—that I’m okay being alone, that I don’t need anyone. But it’s just so hard because I’m—” You sobbed “I’m so fucking lonely. I’m so tired of being alone.” 
The guy tucked the stray piece of hair behind your ears as he carefully wiped your tears with his thumb. He was just silent as he listened to you sob. 
“I’m sorry, I know you definitely didn’t come to this party to watch a complete stranger cry over something stupid.” You couldn’t even look him in the eye, you were embarrassed as this was the first time you felt really vulnerable—especially in front of a stranger. 
“No, you’re alright.” He tried to console you “I think that’s the beauty in strangers, no? You can act and do whatever you want in front of them because there’s a slim chance you’ll ever see them again.” 
You were definitely drunk enough that trying to make sense of who the person was a struggle enough of itself. You tried your best to look at the guy but your vision was getting hazy and you could feel your head thumping that focusing made you feel like you want to crack your head in half. 
A loud knock on the door caused you two to jump. “I’m coming in,” Ophelia yelled and opened the door. Ophelia looked at the guy for a while, trying to make sense of who he was before their eyes widened. “I remember now—You’re Tom Holland.”
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Imagine your surprise when you found out that you were going to work with Tom Holland for a while. You tried your best to avoid Tom at work but of course, that didn’t work out. He never brought up what happened between you two and you assumed he probably forgot all about it.
You tried to rationalize that he meets a lot of people every day. Surely, one failed hook-up wasn’t worth remembering (especially with alcohol involved) and you held on to that. 
At least that’s what makes you sleep at night and also one of the reasons why you considered spending the holidays with him. However, you were also expecting your crew friends to stay with you and not just Tom. 
“Y/N, did you like the gift? It’s from me and Ericka!” Ophelia asked. It was the next day and you two were just chatting on FaceTime. You were sorting out your closet out of sheer boredom. You figured if you were going to stay here for three weeks, the least you could do was sort your clothes out. 
You stared at the neatly wrapped box that Ophelia and Ericka dropped off earlier this morning. “I haven’t opened it yet.” You said as you showed them the box. “I wanna open it till Christmas.” 
“Oh my god, just open it. Christmas doesn’t exist this year, babe.” Ophelia waved their hand, encouraging you to open it. 
“Fine,” You gave in. You opened the box and saw a very lush and well-made lingerie set. “Ophelia, what the fuck” You gasped. You held out the lingerie in front of the camera. 
“Y/N, I definitely outdid myself this time.” Ophelia sighed happily, staring at the screen. “Try it on!”
“Ollie, this is gorgeous but when am I ever going to use this?” You asked holding it out on your body and looking at the mirror. 
“Uh—you’re stuck at home with your failed but also potential hookup,” Ollie suggested, wiggling their eyebrows. “Who knows what might happen?”  
You rolled your eyes at them. “Bold of you assume that something might happen.”
“Something won’t happen if you don’t try that one,” Ophelia said. “C’mon, I wanna see.” 
You shook your head and went out of frame in order to strip off your clothes. You tried on the lingerie—it’s a black lace teddy with a very exposing back. IT fit you perfectly—it accentuated your figure and definitely showed off your boobs. You weren’t really fond of showing off your body but you still tried your best to show it to your friend. 
“What do you think?” You asked, stepping back to the frame. 
“You look gorgeous, babe!” Ophelia squealed. “I knew I made the right choice with black.” 
“I still don’t know where I should wear this though—” You were stopped mid-sentence when your door swung open. 
“I know what we’re doing this—Oh shit. I’m so sorry,” Tom stood there, frozen, his eyes widened and immediately shut the door. 
You couldn’t even say anything. You were frozen in shock.
“Was that Tom?” Ophelia asked from the call, briefly forgetting that you were talking to them through FaceTime. 
You nodded slowly, unable to talk.
“What did he think?” Ophelia asked excitedly. 
You snapped out of this haze. “Ollie,” you groaned. “I think he was mentally scarred. 
“What do you mean scarred? You look great!” Ophelia said, appalled. “If he doesn’t think you look banging in that lingerie then it’s his loss.” 
“I gotta go, I need to change.” You said, bidding Ophelia goodbye. “Thanks for the gift, Ollie. Tell Ericka thanks too.” 
You ended the call and changed into comfier clothes. You couldn’t help but wonder how on earth you’re going to face Tom now that he’s seen you practically naked. Well, it’s not like that’s a new sight. He did see you with your bra on when you were making out in the bathroom that one time. But still! 
Are you actually going to spend your Christmas in your room?
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It was the next day and there are only two more days till Christmas. You spent the entirety of last night in your room after the incident between you and Tom. 
You were about to make yourself some coffee when you found Tom in the kitchen, making tea for himself. You stood there frozen, wondering if you were going to proceed to the kitchen or just run back to your room since Tom hasn’t noticed you—
“Oh—good morning, Y/N.” So close. 
You smiled at Tom and said, “Good morning, Tom.” 
You grabbed a coffee pod and waited for the Keurig to make your coffee. You leaned back against the counter and fiddled with your phone—all in the hopes that things move quickly and for this awkward tension to be over. 
Honestly, why were you so worked up about it? People have seen you in a bikini before and that’s no different from lingerie. If anything, lingerie is itchier and has lace. You should be able to feel confident in your own body and you shouldn’t have to mind what other people think of it. It’s yours alone and it’s your opinion that should matter—
“I’m terribly sorry about last night, Y/N.” Tom apologized, sincerity was written all over his face. “I should’ve knocked and I just got so bloody excited about what we can do over Christmas—but that’s no excuse for what I’ve done. What I did was incredibly intrusive and you deserve a proper apology.”
“Tom, I—”
“I wanted to apologize last night—over dinner—but you didn’t come down to eat, so I figured you didn’t want to talk. “ He rambled on. 
“Tom—” 
“But even then I should’ve asked you to come down and eat dinner because that’s what any decent human would do! And yet I didn’t. God—I’m just doing one wrong thing after another—” 
“Tom, listen to me.” 
“Hm?” He finally snapped out and looked at you in the eyes. 
“It’s okay. It was an honest mistake and you sincerely apologized, and for me, that’s enough.” You smiled softly at him. “So—what’s this thing you planned over Christmas?” 
“I was thinking we could do both our family traditions over the next two days. My family and I usually do a roast dinner and open our Christmas stockings on Christmas Eve. Then on the 25th, we can watch movies all day just like you do with your family.” Tom grinned, clearly satisfied with his plan. “What do you think?”
“I think it’s a great idea,” You smiled “However, I don’t think we have any ingredients for a roast dinner and we don’t really have Christmas stockings. Well—I don’t have any Christmas stockings and stocking stuffers.” 
“That’s true,” Tom mumbled “But I have to do the food shopping anyway. We’re running low on food and I couldn't really book one of those online delivery things that most groceries now offer.” 
You nodded. “Okay, so I guess I have to get the house sorted then.” 
When you two first arrived in this AirBnB a few days ago, it had already been decorated for Christmas. It had a massive tree in the living room decorated with stunning and intricately-themed ornaments. Christmas garlands were wrapped around the stair-bannisters and foliages were placed by the fireplace and the tables. 
All you really had to do was clean the place—do a bit of vacuuming and get things nice and neat for Christmas. It didn’t take you too long to do it too. It had only been a couple of minutes since Tom left to do the food shopping and you prayed to the gods that he doesn’t get too much attention whilst out. 
You figured you might as well do some last-minute shopping while Tom was out, so you can grab gifts for him as well. After all, this whole thing was orchestrated by Tom and you don’t even have anything to give him for his stockings. 
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You arrived at your AirBnB a tad later than Tom. He was in the kitchen putting things away when he saw you walk through the door. 
“Ah, I was wondering whether I spooked you with my plan,” Tom commented, making you chuckle and roll your eyes. 
“Trust me, I would’ve made it very obvious if you did.” You replied, earning a laugh from Tom. “I went out to do my last-minute shopping. Granted, it’s not ideal since we’re still living through a pandemic, but there’s not actually that many people where I went to considering it’s the Christmas rush.” 
You made sure to hide the stuff you bought using the handmade tote bags that a friend gave you for your birthday. No retail bags, no clue. “How did you survive the groceries? I bet it’s busy out there.” 
“Yeah, it was.” Tom chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “Remind me to never do that again for Christmas.” 
“Sure,” You said, “That is if I spend another Christmas with you.” You said jokingly, hoping that Tom didn’t find that rude. 
“You’ll never know,” Tom shrugged. “What if you liked our Christmas this year and you’d be begging to spend Christmas with me and my family in London,” Tom smirked, playing along. 
“Yeah, right.” You scoffed playfully, crossing your arms. “If anyone’s begging, it’s going to be you.”
Tom stepped closer, “Wanna bet?” He whispered, a teasing look in his eyes. “Whoever has the most fun during our respective holiday traditions would have to spend the holidays with them next year.” 
“Oh, you’re on, Holland.” You took a step closer. “We will both film our holidays for the entire two days and then we’ll ask Ophelia, Alex, and Will to vote whoever looks like they had the most fun.”
“Okay,” Tom nodded “But no editing! We’ll give them raw footage so there are no chances of tampering.” 
You laughed but you agreed anyway. “Of course, we’ll give them hours of footage. The least we could do is make them sit through hours of content after they ditched us all alone on the holidays.” 
Tom gave a broad smile. “Let the festivities begin.” 
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It was the 24th of December—Christmas Eve. You spent the entirety of last night wrapping Tom’s presents for later. Not that you despise Christmas, but it’s been a while since you were actually excited to celebrate it. It was pretty clear that the magic of Christmas dies once you grow up. 
Today was different; you were looking forward to whatever Tom has installed for tonight. 
You went downstairs to make some breakfast only to be greeted by Tom blasting Christmas music and preparing some ingredients for breakfast in the kitchen. 
“Good morning, Y/N, happy Christmas Eve,” Tom greeted with a huge grin. “Say, hi to the camera.” 
“Oh, we’re starting this early, huh?” You asked, putting your hair into a loose ponytail. 
“Why of course, we have to make the best out of this,” Tom said, holding the camera to your face. “I made you coffee.” Tom handed you a cup of coffee. 
“Are you using my love for coffee as an advantage?” You tried to hide your smile while drinking your coffee. 
“Obviously not,” Tom feigned his innocence. “I obviously did not know you were obsessed with coffee—it’s not like I don’t see you on set without one.” He mumbled in which you definitely heard, giving him a smack on the head. “Ow! I’m kidding.” He laughed.
You rolled your eyes at him. “So, what’s for breakfast?” 
“We’re going to make french crèpes,” Tom replied and propped the camera on the kitchen island, facing the two of you. 
“Do you know how to make french crèpes?” You asked, washing your hands. 
Tom blinked, almost trying to decide whether he wants to be honest or impressive. “Do you know how to make french crèpes?” He returned the question. 
“Oh honey, my mom resents me in the kitchen.” You replied, taking a sip from your coffee. “But you know, I manage.” You murmured.
“That’s giving me a lot of hope, darling, thank you.” He said half-heartedly. 
“Shut up,” You nudged him playfully, rolling your eyes. “Tom, honestly, most of the footage is just us bantering for 20 minutes.” 
“To be fair, that’s part of the fun.” Tom smiled. “Okay, I think you just mix all of these in a bowl. Start with the dry ingredients first.” He said, looking at the recipe on his phone.
“Okay, that shouldn’t be too hard,” You commented pouring the ingredients into the bowl. As you started all of the ingredients together, you noticed small lumps forming in the batter. “Tom, did you sift the dry ingredients by chance?” 
“You were supposed to sift it?” He asked, completely clueless. 
You nodded slowly. Panic was now clearly painted on his face. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.” You tried to reassure him. 
It was not fine. The first time you two tried to pour the batter in the pan, you burnt the entire thing. It’s not even the cute, lightly burnt crepe. It was activating the smoke alarm-burnt crepe. 
The next one was pancake-like. The next one after that had pocket flours on the crepes because you two didn’t sift your dry ingredients beforehand. You ran out of the batter when you two finally got the consistency right—you managed to get one proper crepe from the entire batter. 
“I feel like Sam would probably curse me out as soon as he finds out I fucked up a simple crepe,” Tom said, delicately filling the crepe with creme and berries. “My brother’s done so well in culinary school.” He cut a piece with his fork and brought it to your mouth.
“Well, you can’t have everything.” You said taking a bite out of the crepe. “This is better than the last one.” 
Tom nodded, taking a bite of it himself. “It’s not as tasty as Sam’s but I’ll take it.” 
“Now, I’m curious as to what your brother’s cooking tastes like.” You commented taking another bite from the crepe. 
“I guess I’ll just take you home to London to find out,” Tom teased with an annoying grin. 
“As long as I’m being fed, I’m fine with it.” You remarked. What in god’s name are you are you two playing?!
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The day rolled by very quickly. It was already evening when you finished wrapping the presents for your friends. You plan on dropping it off tomorrow before you persuade Tom to glue yourselves on the couch for the entire day. 
You grabbed all of Tom’s gifts—Christmas stocking included— when you went downstairs, only to be greeted by someone yelling at Tom through his phone. 
“I did everything right, Sam. I don’t know why you’re yelling.” Tom yelled back at his phone. His back was turned against you as he was putting away the pots and pans that he used. 
You quietly walked up behind him and said calmly, “Why are you yelling?” 
Tom probably jumped six feet away from you, making you laugh. You always forget that he gets scared easily. “Holy shit, don’t scare me like that, Y/N.” Tom breathed out, putting a hand over his chest. 
“I’m sorry,” You said whilst laughing. “I promise I won’t do it again.” Tom rolled his eyes, murmuring something about you being insincere about it. 
“Please do it again!” You heard, whom you assume is Sam, say from the background. You looked at Tom’s phone that’s propped on the island and saw his brothers on FaceTime. 
You beamed at them. “Any recommendations?” You asked, hearing Tom groan behind you. 
“Well, he hates—” 
“This is the last thing I want in 2020, for my brothers and Y/N to conspire against me,” Tom said loudly on purpose, drowning his brothers' voices.
“Tom, don’t be rude. Let your brothers finish—” Tom put his hand against your mouth. 
“I’ll call you guys later,” Tom said “Wave goodbye, Y/N.” He used his free hand to grab your hand and forced a wave towards his brothers. The call soon came to an end and you could only roll your eyes at Tom. You seem to do that a lot around him. You also do a lot of that when you try to hide your feelings towards a person you like but that’s beside the point. 
“So are we going to have dinner first or are we going to do presents first?” You asked fixing your Christmas sweater, a gift from your parents since you and your family usually wear matching sweaters for Christmas. “Or are you the type to wait until Christmas Day to open presents?” 
“We can do the Christmas stockings after dinner tonight, then do the presents tomorrow, if you’d like,” Tom answered with his arms crossed. 
You shrugged, telling him it doesn’t matter since you don’t really go all out on Christmas. Your family on the other hand—the house is always full of people, especially since most of your extended family are usually around during the holidays. You had this ongoing game you made for yourself whether or not you’ll be able to greet everyone with the number of people in the house. 
You could only guess how quiet your family’s Christmas is going to be. You definitely needed to call your parents later. 
“Is the sweater that itchy, Y/N?” You heard Tom ask, breaking away from your thoughts. 
“Huh?” You asked, confused. You didn’t even notice that you’ve been scratching yourself subconsciously. 
“You’ve been scratching yourself since I saw you.” Tom said, chuckling. “It’s a cute sweater on you.” 
You smirked. “That reminds me—I got something for you, Tom.” Tom raised his brow as you grabbed the bag you stashed behind the tree. “Actually my parents got this for you. A little thank you gift apparently for having the tolerance to stay with me over the holidays—as if you had a choice.” You mumbled the last part. 
Tom curiously opened the bag and there revealed a matching sweater such as yours. This year’s sweater was green and had red tinsel all over it, probably the reason why you’re itchy. The real kicker is that—
“No way,” Tom gasped “It lights up?!” He asked laughing. It lights up. 
“Yeah, I don’t recommend turning that on. I did it earlier and I’m pretty sure I was about to combust—it’s a real fire hazard.” You replied, enjoying the genuine joy that Tom is showing on his face. 
“Oh but we have to turn the lights on when we take pictures,” He commented as he put on the sweater. “Thanks, Y/N.” He said softly, surprising you with a hug. 
It’s the first real physical contact that you two had ever since that night when you made out and you were pretty adamant that people were just making up this notion of having butterflies in their stomach—they weren’t. 
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Tom’s roast dinner went surprisingly well. You kept teasing him that it’s Sam that you had to thank because you knew that Tom wouldn’t last in the kitchen without his brother’s instructions. Tom pouted the whole time. You eventually had to tell him 
“It was sweet.” You told him as you helped him clear out the plates. 
Tom was confused. 
“I don’t think I’ve known someone that went through hell and back just to make a great effort Christmas dinner —even if it means getting yelled at by your brother.” You said, smiling softly at him. “I mean it’s just us two, really. We don’t even have to do this.”
“Think that’s the reason why I wanted to do it,” Tom replied. Now you’re confused. “It’s because it’s the two of us—that’s why I wanted to do it.” 
As soon as you heard those words come out of Tom’s lips, you tried your best to stay calm. To say that you weren’t overwhelmed with emotions would be a huge lie. For someone who couldn’t hold their tongue, you were speechless. Tom’s giving you a run for your money and you weren’t exactly thrilled about it. 
After dinner, you and Tom opened your stocking presents. The presents were pretty tame at the start—you both got each other socks, which was hilarious but greatly appreciated. You love socks, especially comfy and cushiony ones. You came to learn that Tom does too, which prompted you two to wear the socks immediately. 
You got him candy canes, he got you chocolates. You also snuck in those small, in-flight alcohol bottles in there too—which he ended up loving. He got you those 10-pack skincare face masks, in which you let out a huge gasp, making him laugh. 
“Oh, we have to use this at some point!” You exclaimed happily “Like, we need to have a spa night—where we just watch movies, doing face masks, eating takeouts. Oh, that’s the dream!” You sighed happily. 
“We still have two weeks left till we go back to work, I'm sure we can find the time to do that,” Tom said with a permanent smile on his face, watching you with pure joy made him feel like he accomplished something big. 
You got him one of those Instax polaroid cameras—true, it was a bit too much for a stocking stuffer especially since the box definitely stood out against the stocking, but you figured he’ll like it. 
“Darling, this is too much but I’m thankful,” Tom commented as he took out the camera from the box. “I can’t wait to use this and keep memories using it—why don’t we start right now?! Let’s take a photo of us and our matching sweaters!”  
Tom took a lot of photos of you two, in the end. A couple of overexposed photos, one with the matching sweaters, one with your faces pressed against each other, one with your faces way too close to the camera, and one where he gave you a kiss on your cheek (he asked if that’s okay, of course, you said yes. it’s not like he hasn’t kissed you before— still no conversations about that, by the way). It was a good thing you got him at least 3 boxes of those 20 pack films in his stockings as well. 
The real kicker was Tom’s “small” stocking present for you. He got you this dainty, gold necklace with a crescent moon charm. You were pretty sure it was expensive because of the teal box it came with. 
“Stop,” You gasped “Tom, now this—this is too much.” You stressed out. “I can’t have this. Nope, you have to return this.”
Tom shrugged as if it was nothing. “You deserve it. Darling, you deserve something nice after this shitty year.” 
“Tom, I’m serious. This is too much.” 
“I’m serious too, Y/N. Keep it, please. I’d be offended if you don’t.”
After the roller coaster of emotions due to the stocking presents, you gave your parents a call to wish them a merry Christmas. They insisted to do a video call because they wanted to see Tom in the family sweater—which your mom wouldn’t stop gushing about. 
“I think your mum loves me,” Tom whispered closely in your ear. He didn't have to try too hard. With the laptop propped up on top of the coffee table, you two were sitting close together on the living room floor—knees touching, maximum close skin contact. CDC would never approve. 
“Yeah, I think it’s the accent,” You mumbled jokingly. 
Tom moved his head to take a good look at you, smiling. You could feel his eyes burning your skin. Why does he have to look at you like that? Why does he have to be this close?
The initial video call with your parents turned into a whole family reunion when you found out they set up a group call with your extended family. Imagine the dread and fear in your eyes when you heard your one aunt ask, 
“Finally, Y/N, is that your boyfriend?” 
Your eyes widened as you stuttered to say your defence, making Tom chuckle. You frowned at him and nudged him saying, “Don’t laugh, tell them no or I’ll never hear the end of it.”
“No, unfortunately, I’m not,” Tom replied, laughing. “However, I do believe we make a cute couple, don’t we?” He teased, earning an earnest yes from your mom. 
You could only wish for the floor to swallow you whole. 
As the clocks rolled to twelve, it was officially Christmas. You and Tom figured you might as well start opening gifts again because Christmas Day is going to be a drag for the two of you. 
“Okay, start with this.” You said as you handed him a gift bag. You didn’t give him a lot of gifts for the actual Christmas Day because you went all out on the stuffers. 
“Pyjamas?” He asked with a grin. You made a signal for him to give you a minute. You ran to your room and changed into pyjamas. 
“Not just pyjamas, Tom, but matching pyjamas!” You exclaimed, laughing. “I saw it and figured we should do this for my day.”
“Sick!” Tom laughed. Tom got into his pair of pyjamas as well and of course, he didn’t forget to pull out his new polaroid camera to take a photo of you two. “Shit, I forgot to film our entire Christmas Eve.” He said as he saw the camera that was still sitting on the kitchen island from earlier that morning. 
You shrugged. “I’m pretty sure you’ll win either way. Just that content from the breakfast crepes was enough to secure your place.” You said jokingly.
“All I’m hearing is that you’re going to spend Christmas with me in London next year.” Tom sang teasingly. 
“Yeah, maybe bringing you to our big Christmas holidays is a bad idea.” You wondered out loud. 
“I like your family,” Tom commented with a smile “and I think they will love having me there for the holidays.” 
“That would be a nightmare.” You mumbled to yourself. 
The rest of the night dragged on. You and Tom finished the rest of your gifts—you got him a watch, he got you a vinyl player. You two managed to watch the first Harry Potter film before you called it a night. 
You were about to head into your room when you heard Tom say, “Mistletoe.”
“Hm?” You hummed, confused. He placed a finger under your chin and gently tilted your head. There you saw a mistletoe hanging by one of the light fixtures. 
“How did that even—” 
“Can I kiss you?” Tom asked, cupping the sides of your face. 
“Hm?” Tom was definitely giving you a run for your money. How can a girl with a speech turn speechless?
“Can I kiss you?” He asked more softly. All you could do was nod. For if you even dare to open your mouth, all of this would cease to exist.  
His lips gently touched yours and then soon moulded into one. It was soft, sweet—familiar. His lips were something you never thought about—at least not a lot but you craved it. You crave his lips, his touch, him. You were riding a new high and you thanked every single god that you were sober to remember this—because this, this is something you want to cherish. 
“You told me you’re tired of being alone,” Tom whispered against your lips. “You don’t have to be anymore. Not when you have me, not ever.”
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PERMANENT TAGLIST: @quaksonhehe @dark-infernal-instruments @trustfundparker @emsma11​ @tomshufflepuff​ @spider-babe​ @goodgirlgonetom​
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clonerightsagenda · 3 years
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Hey hi! I remember you’ve mentioned parent-child themes in Wolf before referencing Eiffel and Hera, can you say more about that? :0
Ok, let's stop talking about necromancy to talk about something even more terrifying... parenthood.
Anyway, yeah! That's the read on their relationship that makes the most sense to me. I'm basing that read on three elements:
Juxtaposition of Anne & Hera
Parallels to Cutter & Pryce
Complementary narratives (idk what to call this bullet point tbh)
Since I know Eiffel/Hera is a popular ship, let me preface this by saying that I'm not saying you shouldn't ship them or that shipping them is incorrect or wrong or whatever. This is a reading, one that I think makes sense and is well-supported by the text, but it's certainly not the only one.
Anyway, lengthy explanation + textual evidence under the cut bc I am putting off having to do this week’s meal planning:
Juxtaposition of Anne and Hera
The narrative draws a connection between Anne and Hera several times. The most obvious is in “Limbo”, where the A plot is Hera struggling with the effects of mental and physical trauma inflicted by Hilbert and Pryce (sort of her evil mom), and the B plot is Eiffel revealing his past where he inflicted mental and physical trauma on his daughter. In case the parallel isn't clear enough, he directly bridges the two plots near the end of the episode.
MINKOWSKI God. I don't know what to say.
EIFFEL Say Hera's gonna be okay.
In "Mayday", Eiffel hallucinates specific crewmates at specific moments. As brain ghost Hilbert notes, "If I am here, it is because some part of you thinks you have to confront [the mathematical reality]." To Eiffel’s subconscious, Hilbert represents cold hard facts in the same way that Minkowski represents crisis response and Lovelace represents a can-do attitude. Near the end of “Mayday”, when he realizes he’s doomed, he says "I guess I'm never going to talk to..." Although he doesn't finish that thought, given the person he tries to leave a message to in the finale, we can guess he's probably thinking about Anne. Who does he hallucinate immediately afterward? Hera.
Finally, in the finale, Minkowski overhears Eiffel making a recording for Anne, where he tells her "Don't let anybody tell you that you can't do something." Later in the same episode, when he's encouraging Hera against Pryce, he tells her, "You can do anything."
An aside: I've heard secondhand that Word of God is that Anne was four when Eiffel last saw her, which would be another point of comparison. However, I can't verify that, and it's not in the text. And no, I'm not saying Hera is the equivalent of a human four-year-old. (Hera's age and whether it even makes sense to assign her a human equivalent is its own post, but mostly I refer to Hera as four in the same way that I refer to myself as a girl - only when it's funny.) I'm an adult, and I still have parents. Our parent/child relationship simply looks different than it did when I was younger.
Parallels with Pryce and Cutter
Based on the way the writers discussed their planning process, most of the characters echo other members of the cast. Eiffel and Cutter - pop culture savvy, communications in their title, the only two to speak 'directly' to Bob - could be seen as one dark reflection, and of course Hera and Pryce reflect each other as well. I've already written about how the numerous Tempest references in the finale suggest a twisted father/daughter relationship for Cutter and Pryce (Prospero my behated), so if they've got an *evil* father/daughter thing going on, then it follows that their non-evil counterparts might have something similar.
Complementary narratives or whatever we’re calling this chunk
Both Eiffel and Hera enter the story with backstories involving parent/child trauma. Eiffel, of course, hurt his daughter when he selfishly and impulsively decided he was entitled to custody, regardless of her comfort or safety. Hera doesn't technically have parents, but her creator and closest equivalent to a ‘mother’ belittles AIs in general, treating them as machines rather than people, and stuck disabling code in Hera's head to keep her compliant.
The two of them are on outwardly friendly terms in season one, but both make comments (Eiffel in "The Sound and the Fury" and Hera in "Am I Alone Now?") suggesting they don’t necessarily respect each other. I imagine a lot of the initial draw was that they like socializing, and neither Hilbert nor season 1 Minkowski are particularly chatty. However, during/after the mutiny, Eiffel gets much more defensive of Hera, and he repeatedly circles back to the attack on her ‘brain’.
I'm not doing it if it means that he gets to stick his fingers in her brain and mess around with her mind again. ("Painfully Ever After")
You know, she's been a little twitchy ever since Hilbert tore her brains out. ("Limbo")
Well, you know how it is when your mechanical brain gets broken and you have to get it replaced with a new one made mostly out of electrical tape and paperclips. Oh, wait, no you don't. ("Happy To Be Of Assistance")
Given what we learn later, I think it's reasonable that he's reacting to the similarities between what happened to her and what happened to Anne. After the mutiny, they grow closer over the rest of the show and start to deal with some of the issues tied to their earlier bad relationships - Eiffel more actively giving a damn about the people around him, Hera bonding with people who treat her as an actual person. Imo, two characters with a past involving opposite ends of a damaged parent/child relationship striking up a *better* parent/child relationship that helps them heal and improve gels better with the narrative and character arcs presented than a budding romance.
Finally, I think this reading adds to the way Eiffel's story ends. In "Limbo" when he's recounting his daughter’s accident to Minkowski, he says bitterly, "I was fine. Of course I was fine. The driver's always fine." In the finale, right before he and Pryce get deleted, he tells her "We're driving off the cliff together". He ended up on the station in the first place because he selfishly hurt his daughter, and he exits the story (as himself, anyway) by choosing to selflessly prevent a daughter figure from being hurt more. (Giving her even more memory-based trauma in the process, but life's a bitch sometimes.) I still dislike endings that erase character development, but looking at it this way made the narrative logic click for me in a way it hadn't before.
In conclusion: Again, I’m not saying people have to read the relationship that way, but I think it fits really well with the text as presented and adds nuance to how the characters’ stories progress and resolve. Sometimes a podcast is also a bad dad competition. This is also more or less what Fullmetal Alchemist is about.
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toji-bunny-girl · 2 years
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when you get this you have to answer with 5 things u like about yourself, publicly. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool) ♡
ummm this is kinda hard wiiwuwhejekjw but I tried hehehe
1. My music taste
Why not. I love my playlists so fucking much like, I have playlists dedicated to each type of music (indie, rock, goth, hyperpop, lofi, grunge, etc) and im super lucky to have music by my side cause I kid you not, I might sound cheesy n cringy but music was the only thing I have at the lowest points of my life 😂🤡 so its smth really personal to me ☝🗿
2. My closet
istg idek why but people in my state are so underdressed liek—ne way I have two different aesthetics the first one ‘lana del ra’s nymphet with bb doll dresses’ the other one pretty much ur grunge/a lil mix of goth gf :\ (my inspo is kinda like misa but I would be lying if I say I dress as well as her 😭😭) plus, I’ve been living inside my closet for years now so it’s totally gon be my number two 😼😼
3. My personality
i have two different personalities depending on how my morning is 🤡 the first one dumb extroverted bimbo who’s a lil overly friendly to ppl the other one grumpy anger issues depressed don’t-talk-to-meh bitch I think I need help from therapy 🤠
4. My loyalty
not sure whether this counts as my personality??? ne way I have a love hate relationship with my loyalty to ppl I love cuz half of them are really toxic and I shouldn’t be with them but I just kept coming back greater than ever 😃 if I love you, I fucking love I love you sm I’m willing to go to war against your enemy just because they bumped into you without saying sorry and even if you hurt me really bad, I just never leave for some traumatic reason 💀💀💀
5. My looks 🤡
Couldn’t think of anything else so Im just gonna write this down. I’m kinda a lil self obsessed tbh cause I used to sacrifice a lot of my happiness for my friends and family so after a pretty bad episode I decided to put myself first which unfortunately ended with me being the way I am rn 😹😹 NEWAY a lot of ppl say that my personality is completely different from how I look after they get to know me cuz I’m a fucking freak when I open my mouth but ‘mysterious n cool n pr*tty 😈’ when I shut tf up 🤨⁉️ (luckily tho I look like my mom 👽)
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Makoto plot line by Lêx?
thank you for this totally 100% spontaneous ask that you sent of your own free will, anon!
okay, so here's the thing. i dont like makoto. not really. he's annoying af and basically useless. bitch does nothing but hide behind haru cuz he's scared of everything and be blushy and soft in that spineless way, you know? like he just lets everyone push him around and treats everyone in such an unfuriatingly uniform, fake-cheery, ultra helpful way that it's his whole personality
but here's the thing! it gets sad. you know? especially considering how he, like, seems to basically live to enable haru? in all the worst ways. like it's nice of course that he helps haru with his depression but there's a point when it becomes enabling and that point is when makoto is running after haru all the time trying to solve his messes, remind him of his own damn responsibilities, and basically take care of haru's whole life so he doesn't have to. again, helping is good, but by worrying about the things haru doesn't worry about and preventing him from facing the consequences of not doing anything basically lmao he enables haru to never fucking get out of his constant stupor. also, as previously said, he's spineless, which means that he never truly goes against haru's wishes. so like. enabler. bad
which is my main beef with makoharu, which is actually the most popular ship in the fandom because ppl have no taste and also dont know how to interpret shit. tho tbh even makoharu shippers are like "i ship makoharu because makoto deserves to be happy and he wants haru!" so even they acknowledge that.... haru isn't into him lmao. but anyway
point is: they pull each other back. im not gonna say it's abusive or something cuz i don't think it is, i wouldn't even call it toxic, but it's stale in the worst kind of way. makoto enables not only haruka's depression, but also his self destructive and to some extent relationships destructive behavior, setting his growth back. and makoto lives and exists to take care of haru. he has no dreams, no goals, hell, not even INTERESTS. his whole thing is just. haru. where haru goes, he follows. and. that's it basically
which is why the fact that so many makoto stans ship makoharu is also baffling to me, because if i were a makoto fan, i'd probably hate haru, lmao. i mean, makoto is going around doing all this work for him, plus emotional labor, and haru never gives him much back really. and it's obvious that haru doesn't like makoto the same way makoto likes him, but makoto is just out there taking whatever scraps he can get, and haru just sort of. probably doesn't even notice cuz that's been their dynamic since they were kids. and makoto knows that, too. so like. if i stanned makoto. id fucking hate haru for that tbh
and honestly it's bad writing because i think the writers couldn't care less about makoto lmao and also didn't know what to do with him, which i think becomes increasingly obvious as seasons go by and he's just sort of. there. they tried to give him his own plotlines and even dreams but it never stuck. he feels like a doll most of the time. even in s1, which was widely rinharu-focused and barely had any other characters have real plotlines unless you count the one (1) episode where they try to teach rei how to swim, makoto was particularly uninteresting and underexplored and developed. like, the other characters might not have had huge importance but at least they had personalities. makoto didn't, really, unless you count "mama henning haru" and "being uwu" as a personality
but my point is: what if makoto got some real writing? what if we explored his character, and his relationship with haru, in a more critical, dimensional way?
makoto is in love with haru, i think that's indisputable. haru isn't in love with makoto, which i also think is indisputable. makoto himself knows that what haru has with rin is special and beyond what makoto and haru have, he says that, he even says that he was jealous of rin. yet he stays. even when rin comes back, and haru and rin become friends again, and it's obvious they're going to be together, makoto stays. he takes care of haru, which is some pretty damn stressful work, and does all this emotional labor for him, and haru barely gives him, like, a smile every once in a while, lmao, and again it's sad. but makoto stays. and - that's an important part to me - it doesn't seem to be because he has any hopes that haru will come around. so why
i think they're stuck in a loop, and that makoto has been in love with haru, and being not only his emotional support, but basically the one thread connecting him with the outside world (while simultaneously enabling him to continue as detached from it as he can, because he's not bringing haru out to the world, he's bringing the world to accommodate haru) for so long, he doesn't really know what else to do. also, he feels guilty about leaving haru to his own devices, even if obviously there's nothing he can do if haru won't help himself. also, he's scared of losing him, because he's been defining himself for his relationship with haru for so long, he doesn't know where else to go
i think that's supported by his relationship with other characters. like i said, makoto is annoyingly kind to everyone (if im not mistaken, the name makoto actually does mean kind) and a MASSIVE pushover. he never goes against anyone's wishes. he never really throws in what he wants. he doesn't really interfere with anyone's plans and ideas, he just sorta makes it happen. he is never annoyed, never has any quirks, is never even like, tired, you know? he lives to please other people, to the point where he has no personality, interests, or wishes beyond that
so, yeah: i think makoto is scared that, if he doesn't please other people, there's nothing else left for him. and in a way, he is right, because i don't think he would know what to do with himself if he had to look into himself and figure out what he wants out of life. so it's easier to follow others and dedicate himself to them. also, fear of loneliness is very valid, even if i dont think any of his friends would actually leave him if he weren't being their damn mom all the time. but they also let it happen, especially haru, because it's convenient, and again, homeboy barely has the energy to go to school, much less help makoto unpack all of that
but if i were writing free!, id want to explore that, because it has so much potential to be a pretty damn rich story, actually. especially as the story progresses, because one effect of rin being back and haru running the whole swimming club and trying to prepare for their race is that haru needs makoto less and less as time goes by. because he has a motivation. he cares about his grades because if he doesn't keep them up he won't be allowed to keep working in the swimming club, he cares about teaching the newbie (the rei i mentioned before) how to swim because otherwise they won't be able to run against rin in the medley race, hell, he reforms the whole entire pool that was abandoned so they have a place to train (with help, but like, he couldnt be bothered with getting up to school before). he even goes back to drawing so he can make pamphlets to attract more people to the club
and then he finds his love for swimming again, especially as a team, competitively. he finds his love for people again, for human interaction, for competition and the thrill of the sport he loves. haru finds his motivation, and he starts putting his life back on track and working towards his goals, and haru is damn capable. and that means that makoto has a lot of free time in his hands now, and haru is slipping through them, and he knows he can't really keep their relationship as he was. and he shouldn't, honestly, and i think that he's, at least, smart enough to know this
and he has a crisis, because again, he's been defining himself through haru for the longest goddamn time, im talking all the way from middle to high school here. and he doesn't know who he is. he doesn't know what he wants. he barely knows what he likes
but he's not alone either, because again, makoto is haru's best friend, and haru does like him and it's not like he's all "i found my purpose with rin now. peace out". his journey was also about finding his whole support system with his friends. through relearning how to swim in a team, he also relearned human connection and friendship. that's one of the many beauties of rinharu. they inspired each other to make their lives better, including in ways that have nothing to do with each other, and they weren't even trying to
so he has haru, but in a now radically different dynamic, and also rei and nagisa (his teammates) and gou (rin's sister and also their trainer) (rin and gou don't go to the same school for some reason). and everyone is going through a similar crisis, because it's the last year of high school. rin obviously has known that he wants to be an athlete since he was a kid, but everyone else's plans are kinda sketchy. makoto just happens to have some extra flavor in that mission - he's not just trying to figure out what he wants to do, but who he is
and fuck if i know how that would develop from there, but id really love to see makoto finding himself, honestly. i want to see his issues being addressed. the only backstory we have for him is that he's afraid of the ocean because he almost drowned at some point? i dont remember. i want to know why the fuck he's been repressing his own needs and personality so hard. i want to know what had him so scared of the world that it was easier to forget about himself and basically live through haru. i want to know what he's going to do to find himself, and the very, very painful journey of looking at himself and his own needs, and, in many ways, his own emptiness, because makoto essentially carved himself hollow. i want makoto to have dimension and depth, and be relatable and not just a dumb shell of uwuness for ppl to swoon over and want to protecc, not even because i like him, but because it could be so interesting. and relatable in so many ways. like, god damn it. if you wanna make him one of the main characters, give him a real plotline!
and i want to see him finding out that his life is better when he's a little more detached from haru and not living in an endless pursuit of a relationship, but having a network of people he loves and that has mutual support. i want to see him getting over haru, not so he can have some other romance with someone else, but so he can grow. makoto basically doesn't grow at all the whole show, and it's sad to watch, especially as everyone else grows so much
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sillyfudgemonkeys · 4 years
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Was reading your response to the Okumura Ryuji/Morgana fight, and the way the person worded Ryuji's character made me wanna ask... Do you think a bad fanbase is a fair reason to dislike a character? I've heard people say things like "no look at the character too", but... For example, I'm very neutral on Ryuji. When he's good, hes SO GOOD, EXCELLENT BOY, but Ann is my favorite girl. Guess who he pervs on exclusively and is rude to all the time? I've never seen his fans talk about (1/2 sorry)
His rude behavior, or his pervy tendencies, or his more selfish desires regarding the PT. That's fine!! Not everyone wants to constantly talk about bad things their fave has done!!! But people referring to him as a "woman respecting king" so insistently rubs me the wrong way, since he treats Ann Like That. That, and (more personal) i remember making a post/ask thing once about my grievances with Ryuji, esp his perv stuff, and the fans that interacted very aggressively denied his behavior (2/3)
And it even turned into a big discourse on the blog I submitted it to (it was that one confession blog). All the people that responded and just tried moving the arguments to "well Yusuke did this-" or even tried to push blame on Ann "she was asking for it" just kinda cemented my already growing dislike for Ryuji. Super sorry this is so long!!! Final question: is a bad fanbase a fair reason for disliking a character? (3/3)
Don’t say sorry about multiple sent asks, I don’t mind kfdsjla;fja As for the answer, I want to say yes and no, but really it’s just “yes with a side note attached.” Yeah, it’s ok to not like a char because of their fans, but I think it’s as long as you know why you dislike the char beyond the fans (well tbh, imo it’s usually the crazy fans so I think stans is a better word, but even then there’s diff stans). And tbh, I....can’t....think of a character I don’t like that the fandom/fanbase does....but I know nothing about the char all the while (closest and most recent example this....is....I know people dislike that grey haired moe blob on twitter even tho I don’t think they watched the show, and while I’m not a fan of the moeblobness I don’t know anything about the char so I’m personally not upset). I can only name chars I don’t like because of what happens in the text, fandom be damned (but sometimes they don’t help). Which is why it’s a yes with a side note. If you don’t like the char despite not knowing them.....probably get to know the char first even if your impression is clouded by the fandom....at least you gave the char a chance. 
Under cut cause length (first few sentences in the first paragraph under the cut/tldr at the end gives you the answer a bit more in depth, the rest is rants related to that and why I get frustrated in a similar sense too, but yeah sorry if I repeat myself, I kinda jumped all over + my tendency to try to nail a point home I feel like might’ve had me repeat a bit more than usual akslfjdakfjaf):
I say this because.....it’s hard....it’s hard to keep them separated, unless you completely isolate yourself from the fandom (which is basically impossible if you wanna keep up with news, even the comment section is part of the fandom tbh...and you might be looking down their for diff reasons). And then.....well...the big reason....sometimes seeing the fans really highlights the reasons you dislike the char. That’s what happened to me and Makoto, specifically cause of....a certain fan (and buddy if you happen to see this, nothing against you, no bad blood, def won’t mention your name I respect you and the debates we had)....AND TO THE TUMBLR READERS WHO GET NERVOUS: It wasn’t on this website in case anyone is freaking out so if you’re thinking “Oh god it’s me” it is most likely not you (tho I think we do know each other on here cause of usernames/saw each other in passing but we def aren’t mutuals last time I checked), and while I do respect that person.......my god did they highlight the reasons I had issues with P5 and Makoto. Ironically in trying to defend her and show off her good sides, I realized the writing issues more and more and her bad sides became more glaring. It turned my frustrating dislike and attempt to try to work out my issues with her and P5 (ironically “working out” in hindsight would’ve been me....denying and refusing to look at P5′s flaws) into....well......the salt factory you know today. (same thing happens with like......Yukari and Junpei fans too tbh...that’s more recent tho, it feels like they are just downplaying their negatives constantly and I’m not about that). Basically, you probably have issues already, they are just more pronounced now. 
As for “look at the character”....you kinda already are doing that, and that’s probably where your existing issues originated from (tho if someone wants a more in depth reason as to why, while you DON’T OWE them an explanation, it is also hard for someone to understand your feelings and reasons if you don’t try to explain). 
As for Ryu, yea, I getcha, I like the guy, I’m neutral positive on him....was my best bro but he’s 2nd best thanks to post-Kamo writing. I like him because of his positives, but I always keep his negs in mind because. Cause like while I agree with the fans IT MAKES NO SENSE! P5′S WRITING IS BAD! it happened, same as I agree that Anne kicking Ryu’s ass, along with the other girls, is shitty. Hate the scene, and I accept that it happen (low key gonna start some kinda 2nd wave war with this bs cause the fandom be like that, but I’m really surprised no one took Anne smacking Ryu behind the neck cause he was being too loud as super offensive and abuse.......it’s def something a friend might do, not like belting him just a tap, and it’s framed as chill and also as warning him to reign in the volume control, but high key surprised no one has tried to cancel her cause of that). BUT that DOESN’T mean it erases all the creepy stuff he’s done. Is he the goodest boi when he’s being good? The best. Is he always a good boi? No, he def is not. And hearing that he is can be frustrating to people that do see his flaws (cause they are there). And like....you are 100% able to like a character despite and because of their flaws, while also accepting they have those flaws. I do it with Yosuke, Ryuji (for the most part), Teddie, Shinji, Ken, Kanji (when he’s not around Naoto, then he’s in a trash can for me), P1/2 casts, Aigis, Mitsuru, as long as the flaws are within reason and are treated pretty well....then I’m ok with it. (again, Kanji/Ryu have moments when I’m like....NOPE! but when they aren’t doing the bad thing I’m cool with them). As long as the flaws are withing reason (aka they aren’t making a jerk person out to be the person in the right, or the writing is trying to sweep what they did under the rug, or trying to force us into empathizing with them despite what they did while also trying ot sacrifice empathy towards another char.....*cough*Makoto/Yukari/Junpei*cough* if the writing isn’t doing that...... I’m probs neutral to pos on them). 
Like I’m fine if they are criticizing the writing and being like “Him doing this makes no sense cause it conflicts with the good boi we’ve already seen!” That’s a-ok! Not only do you recognize your char has flaws, you also are able to identify issues with the writing. But saying “so I’ll choose to ignore that scene” isn’t....ok. Because sadly it did happen, as contradictory it did happen. AU it all you want, but you have to accept it happened outside of that AU. Like, I don’t like the Mika conflict in Anne’s CoOp, by which I don’t like how it went down (100% fine with Mika, and there being conflict with her). How it the whole thing started doesn’t make sense if you put MainStory!Anne in her CoOp. MS!Anne can read the room and other people’s emotions (only other person capable of that is Haru, or at least with Mona), hell she was so good at it she noticed something was up with Shiho without Shiho telling her about it! The issue was the fact Anne’s not a mind reader and could only assume the issue Shiho was going through that Anne was aware of (and that was her spot on the team). Now MS!Anne is not like Yosuke, she doesn’t put her foot in her mouth. She’s not like Naoto who can’t read the room. She’s not super eloquent, but can empathize and when she can interact with people she can do it pretty well. So why the hell does she basically not think before talking and insult Mika? Sure Anne’s not GREAT at school, but she’s not a moron, she can talk to people. But her CoOp makes her a moron all around, 100% airhead, and that’s how her issues with Mika start, by not thinking before talking and accidentally insulting her via blatantly “not caring” about the job to a full time person......it’s stupid, it makes no sense, I hate it. But it’s there, the flaw might not be present in the main story, but for the all around character (cause CoOps are included) it is now and I just have to deal with it. We can bitch about it all day (and trust me I will) but it happened. Basically never frame it as “it didn’t happen,” but instead “It SHOULDN’T HAVE happened.” One is denial, the other is critiquing the text. 
Anyway my rant aside, yeah I hate it when...well Ren/Ryu/Yusuke (no one’s said Mona yet, cause....well yeah...which is good they haven’t labeled him as it yet tho), are labeled as “drinking respect women juice” and I’m like “I have one to a few women who would disagree.” I know some people will argue Goro is drinking it, and imo he’s not....he’s just eating the “I don’t discriminate sandwich” which is different. And yeah the “But Yusuke-” yeah yeah we’ll get to him, but right now we’re talking about RYUJI. I’m not a fan of derailing a topic *war flashbacks* *shivers* anyway. But yeah I remember that debate, I was probably one who was like “We’ll get to Yusuke but right now we’re talking about Ryuji” and pushing the blame onto Anne is disgusting and Kamo Arc!Ryuji would be very upset. >:( (btw high key I think I was the first one who started the first anti-makoto war wave with me saying “yeah Anne shouldn’t have apologized Makoto started it and blah blah she was an ass” not the exact words but basically just calling her out on her shitty behavior cause the game certainly didn’t......tho as Miley Cyrus would say.....”I didn’t mean to start a waaaaaar~!” I actually wrote my first Persona Problems on that topic.......but it got lost in the drafts....my photo examples kept getting messed up which is bad considering the whole post really relied on them....I should try to dig it up tbh....)
Tldr/short answer: Yeah, you probably already have issues with the char to begin with tbh, and the fanbase can highlight those issues more. It’s also hard to escape the fanbase (I see stuff I don’t wanna see despite trying my hardest to avoid certain circles, it just happens).
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sabinefm · 4 years
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( bruna marquezine , cis female , peach ) welcome to aida&stefano , SABINA REUBE ! thank you for choosing to stay here. in this form it says that you go by the SHE / HER , you’re TWENTY THREE years old , you’re originally from SAN FRANCISCO , and you’ve been staying here for ONE YEAR . it also says you’re known to be + RESOURCEFUL , but also - SELFISH. that really shouldn’t be a problem though. check in at the front , hope you enjoy your stay ! (the click of heels, hot sand under your bare feet, chocolate covered strawberries, the imprints a bra leaves on your skin, red lipstick staining your fingertips )
ABOUT THE MUN.  i hope this email never finds you 
hello all, my name is pepper and i have never been on time for anything, ever in my life sdjkdskj this is especially true today, rip. no but honestly, i never thought i would actually get accepted into this beautiful rp so i stalled checking acceptances cause i’m a Scaredy Cat and that made me really late, and then i ended up taking the rest of my coworker’s shift cause she had to go and thus ended up coming home even later than i thought which has made me really really late... BUT against all the odds i’m here! and ready to party! and tell y’all about my bby sabina! but first a little bit about me, i am twenty four (ew), i can’t cook (rip), and i currently spend most of my lonely quarantine days either watching anime or scrolling through tiktok. i am canadian but every canadian that meets me thinks i’m american and i don’t know why. when i was a child i had an irrational (or yk very rational) fear of sharkboy from sharkboy and lava girl, and tbh it has never left me. i was also afraid of gill from kim possible so you can imagine my horror when that fish f*cking movie won an oscar?? when i was younger i also thot god looked like king triton from the little mermaid cause he was white and he had a beard yk. it fit in my little brain. and finally i just recently discovered girl in red and therefore feel like i finally got my bi girl card,,, feeling validated in this chillis tonight. and if that doesn’t tell you everything you need to know about me idk what will. anyways, that’s officially enough about me onto who we’re all really here for, ms sabine!
BIO.  the lengths i would go to to both get attention and avoid it... astounding  tldr ; daughter of a guy who created a dating site + app, came to a&s after leaving her husband to be at the alter after catching him cheating with her mother, wants to be a bad bitch, sometimes succeeds. 
THEN.
sabina came into the world the child of a mediocre stay at home mom and a penniless entrepreneur so it goes without saying that she had very little. her dad had a lot of passion and a lot of drive but no one would really give him a chance, and her mother kind of only married the man because she was expecting him to make it big enough for her to never have to work another day in her life so? yeah she was hella disappointed tbh 
but not sabina! she looked up to her father so much as a child. while her mom was kind of ~emotionally unavailable~ her father was too, but like at least he had a dream he believed in, yk? he wanted to help people fall in love and sabine being the big romantic she was as a child had never heard of anything so noble. her daddy was her hero. sabina honestly had big daddy’s little girl vibes until she was like 22 tkjsdkjd
one day when their family credit card got rejected one too many times sabina’s mother called it quits on yk the whole mother gig. she left sabina on a bench outside of the grocery store while she went to go home and ‘get some cash’ which even at seven sabine knew was a damn lie cause they were too broke to have any damn cash. and yeah that was the last sabina heard of her for a long ass time. it was a reverse ‘dad went to get some cigarettes’ situation but just as traumatic honestly. 
although not as much for sabine’s dad. that man literally saw his wife leaving him as a minor setback and moved on. he threw himself harder into his work, to the point where sabine barely saw him. this was the start of sabine desperately trying to compete with her father’s business for even a sliver of his attention. this was a battle she usually lost. 
sabine raised herself for a while there, since her father yk remarried his job and her mother was following the jonas brother’s cross country. she became both very independent and very lonely for a child, which was an odd combination that both haunted sabine for pretty much the rest of her life after that point and lead her to make most of her worst decisions. but that’s a story for another time, because right when all hope was lost sabine’s father won the lottery. literally. 
all at once they were five million dollars richer. they went from nothing to everything real quick. and this marked a change in the reube’s lives in a way sabine couldn’t have even imagine at the time. 
sabine’s father hector used the money to fund his business and that shit blew up! he created a site by the name of loveisblind that was in the ring with the likes of match.com and christianmingle yk, one of those dating sites. everyone on loveisblind is set up on blind dates based on the information they fill out on their profile and are only allowed to see each other when they reach a certain point of emotional intimacy. the site had wild success rates, and got very popular, blah, blah, the point was the reubes? suddenly rich af!
and you think that would give hector more time to spend with his daughter right? no. it gave hector the money to hire nannies for his daughter. 
yes, somehow despite hector no longer having to work himself to the bone, sabine saw him even less. tragic really. she really became that lonely rich girl trope real quick, and this is what unfortunately got sabine into the habit of seeking the attention she wasn’t getting from her father in other men and women, which she is not proud of. 
that unfortunately didn’t fill the void that sabine had but you know what did? making the loveisblind app so her daddy would love her. basically around the time that tinder started gaining traction and getting popular, people stopped going on the loveisblind site and started instead turning to apps. her father was trying and failing to get into that market, and sabina, being yk, actually a lot more intelligent than her father ever gave her credit for, created the app for his site and pitched it to him over his lunch one day. it was honestly one of the first times sabina can remember her father really paying attention to her in the longest time. it was also the proudest she’s ever seen him. 
the app was a big success! a whole new generation was using it and finding love, including one ms sabine reube. in the early days of the app launch sabine met her prince charming, christopher ‘kit’ johannson. he swept her right off her feet, and she fell HARD, and when they debuted their relationship it wasn’t long until they kind of became the face of the app?? like sabine’s father was the creator after all, the fact that his daughter found love on the app too was big news for a while. people followed their relationship and strived for something like that for themselves. sabine didn’t know it at the time but they were basically a walking advertisement, and her father was LIVING for that.
fast forward a bit and your girl went to yale for computer engineering and business (did her daddy’s status and money ease the way? maybe man, nepotism am i right) whilst kit went to harvard, they were long distance for a bit before they graduated and kit very publicly proposed (the whole thing was well recorded too, gotta get that gram), and then both sab and kit moved in together and both started working for their families respective companies. it was around then that sabine started to understand just how much and how often kit was cheating on her. it was a real wakeup call. 
sabine ended up breaking down to her father about her suspicions, and he basically ended up telling her to suck it up and think of the business. the fact was sabine and kit, the face of their new generation and one of the first successful couples from the app getting married and living happily ever after was amazing for the company. and the two of them calling the whole thing off just because of a little infidelity just wasn’t going to cut it. 
now once again, this is where sabine’s deep desire to be loved and accepted really bites her in the ass. this was one of the first times sabine’s father had ever really asked her for anything so... she did it. or at least she did her best to do it. she lasted until the wedding day around the time where she caught kit and her own mother (who she only invited out of a deep rooted need to actually know the woman who gave birth to her again) going at it in the coat closet of their wedding venue. yeah, at that point sabine pretty much snapped, blacked out, smashed a whole wedding cake over kit’s head, and took their honeymoon to venice on her own. she arrived at Aida&Stefano with running mascara in a ruined wedding dress trying to ask about a honeymoon suite. it was a whole mess, but you know what so is sab so at least she was on brand. 
NOW.
after sabina arrived she spent about a week mourning her failed almost-marriage and yk, destroyed family before she decided to fuck it all and reinvent herself. she desperately wanted to become someone new, someone unrecognizable from who she was before, even if it was only on the inside. so she cut her hair (the first step to every transformation) hardened everything soft about herself and made the irrevocable decision to become a bad bitch. she (mostly) succeeded. kind of. 
sabine basically curb stomped out the soft, hopeless romantic people pleaser in her and decided to become someone more unsympathetic. someone who puts her own needs first instead of burning herself up to keep others warm (cause what good has that ever done her before?). someone who people would be afraid to hurt but who wouldn’t even feel pain anyways. and to sum it up that person is a heartless bitch. or at least she tries to be.
i’m gonna stop here because this is already a lot longer than i wanted it to be and i haven’t even got to the other sections yet rip but you get the point i feel
PERSONALITY.  *feels nothing* mmm, don’t like that *feels something but like too much* mmm not a fan of that either 
most of this is tbd because i’m still developing her but
VAIN. the kind of girl who will file her nails or check herself out in the mirror while you’re talking to her. will reapply her lipstick in the rearview mirror of her car while she’s driving. checks herself out in any reflective surface, i mean i would too if i looked like bruna but Still 
KIND. even though sab tries to be a hard ass she’s probably the most loyal, generous, kind person you would ever meet deep down. like she puts on this persona of being heartless, but if anyone needs her she will be there for them. kind of hates that she’s such a softie sometimes but she can’t help it. 
EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE. doesn’t want to be hurt again and will do pretty much anything to avoid that. tries to keep people at arms length especially romantically. loves making friends though, and will indeed spoil them. 
HEADCANNONS.  who wants to hire me as their maid i’m not gonna clean im just gonna wear a cute maid outfit dust like 6 things and bend down a lot
has the vibes of that drunk rich aunt that’s always smoking like sexily as she looks far into the distance and wears like a super luxurious coat. will gossip with you. will buy you things your mom won’t. will cuss out your toxic father at the dinner table. that’s her energy.
unfortunately actually does smoke. i hate 
okay fun fact, the only reason sabine went to university for computer programming and business was because she felt her father wanted her to. she honestly has no real passion for the subject and just wanted to use her talent to make her father as proud of her as he was on the day she debuted that app to him. but now that making daddy proud isn’t like the only thing occupying her entire brain sabine like is like ??? wait what do i actually want to do with my life ??? and it took her a while to figure it out but after a while she fell back on one of her passions, art. she’s actually making a graphic novel aimed towards young adults about a modern day hades and persephone vibe, kind of about a girl who falls in love with the grim reaper and the lengths she goes to to chase after her (yes it is a Lady Reaper) into the depths of hell,,, it’s wild. she’s very proud of it but also kind of shy about it tbh. her go to critic is georgio, because she knows that little shit will be honest and yk what she respects that. 
but when it comes to making actual money your girl turns to cam work most of the time, because well. at the very least it’s quick, easy, and semi discreet. and sometimes she gets something out of it too. she figures it’s a win win, and she’s been doing it for about a year now, mostly because she absolutely refuses to use any of her father’s money. 
is allergic to cucumber. 
has a different 'relationship’ like every week or so, along with a few one night stands peppered in. unfortunately still attracted to people who are bad for her (kit for example was an asshole and a cheater and DEFINITELY conservative like she messed up on that one), but is also very afraid of falling in love again and letting herself get hurt, so she normally doesn’t let things last too long before she starts self sabotaging. 
if you ever catch sabine with like... her nails growing out or her nail polish chipped, something is wrong. like something is deeply wrong. sabine will have her nails done in the middle of the apocalypse, the only reason they would be less than perfect is if she is having a breakdown. always has colour on her nails, and usually it’s a shade of red, purple, or black. 
always has wild ass stories to tell about her tinder dates or one night stands and will tell them without shame for your entertainment. is a great storyteller honestly, a talent she got from her mother but she doesn’t want to admit that. 
fun fact, her mother mariah was PISSED when hector got rich AFTER she left him and tried for years to sue him or something but no dice. she was so angry and vengeful over the whole thing that she took the opportunity of being invited to her daughters wedding to get back at her husband where it hurt, his business. thus sleeping with kit. didn’t really think about how her daughter might feel about the whole thing because she was yk blinded by rage, but that’s just how mariah is so i mean,,, rip sabina. 
shops when she’s sad, or happy, or angry, or confused sdkjdsj will use any excuse to shop, and at this point she has more clothes than she knows what to do with. her style can be kind of out there at times, but she will let you borrow things though. 
she has a cat named momo. yes that is inspired by her being the peach skeleton. also has a parrot named poe i think. i also have the urge to give her a snake but... i will resist. so sabine wants a snake for sure 
her favourite colours are black and red
she is a horrible terrible driver. don’t drive with sabine unless you’re an adrenaline junkie or like want to die tbh 
her dad 100% set up the relationship between kit and sabine as a pr stunt, but sabine doesn’t know that yet and when she finds out her father used her like that ooh boy things are gonna get wildt. as it is now sabine just thinks she disappointed him and it’s kind of eating her alive. half the reason she’s staying here is because she doesn’t want to face him or yk her old life anymore. her father is so caught up in the shame she caused him that he hasn’t even tried to call her after the whole thing and the one time sabine got hella drunk and called him all he did was tell her what a disappointment she was and ask when she was coming back to work so we love ~parenting~
WANTED CONNECTIONS. girls will “🥺🥺🥺🥺” their way out of everything
close friends please and thanks, best friends also please, uh, can i get some awkward one night stands that avoid each other at all cost, can i get a neighbour who’s ear sabine is always talking off in the hallway between their rooms even tho they just want to go home but can’t because sabine is Oversharing, maybe a flirtationship, but also i would love an enemy (it could be for a ridiculous reason or a completely valid reason but either way please give it to me), someone she goes out dancing/partying with at piccolo, a sibling like relationship, a confidante, someone who she trusts to read her comic and maybe even do some linework, and absolutely anything else okay my brain is fried rn but i want it all! please like this and i will slip and slide into your dms <3
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cleoxortiz · 4 years
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𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭  𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐨.
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( cindy kimberly, cis female ) hey ! have you seen CLEO ORTIZ around ? SHE works as a BARTENDER at big bear resort, but they must be off their shift by now. well, if you do see them can you let me know ? they’re 22 years old & they’ve been working here for TWO WEEKS. they tend to be AMBITIOUS & AUDACIOUS, but can also be VEXING & HUBRISTIC. the other employees have labeled them THE HELLKITE. thanks a lot ! ( the sound of stilettos against marble floors, a menacing smile worn on red lips, the glimmering lights of the manhattan skyline, a silent eye-roll that cuts deeper than words ) [ jocey, 23, est, she/her ]
it’s ya girl jocey and i’m so excited for all the fluffy holiday cUTeNesS! apologizing in advance for the terror that is cleo. she is truly the worst™. but i love the grinch stole christmas, so y’kNOW WHAT? this felt v fitting ok sdkgkgjk. so hit that subscribe like button if ya wanna plot & we can chitty chat on discord!
name : cleo valentina ortiz age : twenty-one sexuality : pansexual hometown : new york city, new york job : bartender at the avalanche pub
━ the ortiz’s didn’t always have a net worth of millions. with humble beginnings in catalonia, spain, the family moved to america a couple generations ago to expand their winery business. it was only then did the family-run business grow by producing, shipping and selling their premium wine brand. eventually they got into the nightlife entertainment business as well, through acquiring and running several bars, clubs and lounges all around america.
━  as the second and youngest child born to miguel and selena, it was never in the books for cleo to take over the family business. a traditional man, her father had always groomed her older brother, adrian, to be his successor. her father’s bias always left her feeling bitter and resentful, and only drove her ambitions and determination to prove him wrong. the more he kept her at arm’s length, the more driven she was to find an in.
━ unfortunately, her mother, a socialite/philanthropist herself, also had different plans for cleo - something along the lines of becoming a debutante and her daughter following in her footsteps. from being forced into piano lessons, ballet and etiquette classes, she absolutely despised the person her family wanted to mold her into. both stubborn in wanting to get their way, cleo and her mother’s differences pulled their mother-daughter relationship further and further apart.
━  even her mom’s passing when she was 14 did little to change cleo’s opinion in the matter. she claimed she didn’t care about the woman’s death, nor did it affect her whatsoever, and she will gladly tell anyone that. but the fact that she currently attended columbia university, her mom’s alma mater, may hint at something different.
━  a hustler with an alpha bitch mentality, she’s always outsmarting people and outsmarting the system to get things to work in her favour. and when that didn’t work, no one could ever say no to a big fat wad of cash. because cleo ortiz never loses. she doesn’t just play the game, she owns it, makes the rules and wins. every. damn. time. does she think she’s better than everyone? without a doubt. does she care about anyone other than herself? not a chance. if it ever appeared that she did, then chances are, it’s only to benefit herself somehow.
━  cleo swears by the belief that playing by the rules was for suckers and if you weren’t the best, then you were nothing at all. and sometimes being the best required playing dirty. if she has to ruin someone else’s life to get her way, then she will gladly pour a jug of gasoline, light a match and enjoy watching it go up in flames. hell, more often than not, she’ll do that just purely for her own enjoyment. because if she has to be bitter and miserable, then why shouldn’t everyone else be too?
━  with that mentality, it’s no surprise that cleo came up with a scheme to sabotage her father’s newest business deal with the owner of big bear resort. the ortiz family had been vacationing there since she was little, so it was only right that they expanded their business roots there as well. unfortunately, cleo screwed herself over with her own ambition and the scheme more or less blew up in her face. 
━  in an attempt to salvage the partnership, cleo was given an ultimatum - work at the resort, or face the legal repercussions and risk losing her trust fund. she didn’t have to think twice about which option to go with. working at the resort would just give her twice as many opportunities to sabotage the deal, yet again. and this time, she didn’t plan on leaving until she succeeded. the only minor obstacle was having to actually work while she was here, but how hard could bartending be, right??
WANTED CONNECTIONS.
BEST FRIEND ━  someone who can put up with cleo’s awfulness, or maybe they’re just as awful as she is. this is probably one of the few people she’s actually relatively soft for ( not that she’d ever admit it ), will always have their back & will probably? let her guard down for. gimme some soft bestie feels for this cold bitch.  taken by kieran rhodes, caleb xu PARTNER-IN-CRIME  ━  i’m sure even satan has a little devil on his shoulder, so cleo needs one too. basically they like to stir up all kinds of trouble together, both fueling each other’s vices.  taken by ian moon, harper delgado MORAL CONSCIENCE  ━  does cleo even have a moral compass? your guess is as good as mine. this is someone she is more likely to listen to and could try to sway her from doing, y’know, ~*just cleo things*~. kind of like the angel on her shoulder. often tries to get her to just be a decent human being. the cindy lou to her grinch if you will LOL??  taken by aylie greer BAD INFLUENCE  ━  someone cleo is a bad influence on. she’s the little devil on their shoulder and manipulates convinces them to do ~*just cleo things*~ with her. after all, she needs to entertain herself somehow while she’s stuck here esgjdgkgk.  taken by claire beauvard ON/OFF  ━  they’ve been in this on-and-off relationship for what’s felt like forever and  they have their moments, but didn’t always get along. despite that, they just keep coming back to each other for their own reasons.  taken by marco di angelo ENEMIES  ━  homegirl can piss off a lot of people just for shits and giggles, nor does she care to be likeable and personable, so i’m sure she’s got a hella long list of enemies/people she rubs the wrong way. also people she’s sabotaged, fucked over and manipulated to get her way? plz.  taken by kamille osman, theodora kwon CHILDHOOD FRIENDS ━  they’ve known each other since they were kids, probably met when cleo’s family visited big bear. they can still be friendly, not get along at all, or maybe it’s an ex-friend situation. UNWANTED CHILD  ━  cleo somehow ended up being this person’s very reluctant mom friend. she hates it, she does not want to deal with them, and yet she’ll still go pick up their drunk ass at 4am. she’s all about tough love, so while she may be super harsh and hard on them, she does it because she cares ( not that she’d ever actually admit to caring ).  taken by leo takanashi UNLIKELY/ACCIDENTAL FRIENDS  ━ they shouldn’t get along, but somehow they just do and their friendship works. not typically someone cleo would see herself being friends with, but one way or another, an accidental friendship of sorts developed.  taken by callie macdermot, nadia perez, ivan anderson MUTUAL ANNOYANCE ━  they annoy each other to no end and just live for pushing each other’s buttons. not quite a hatred, but some days, it’s pretty darn close. maybe there’s some sexual tension involved cuz that’s always the good shiet.  taken by axel schaefer HOOK-UPS/FWBS ━  self-explanatory. a girl’s got needs. whether she actually likes you as a person or not, if you’re hot, then you’ll do the job. rip why is she like this. we can make it angsty or not because tbh cleo can be pretty possessive sometimes, so y’knOW.  taken by roman walsh
okay, that’s all i can think of off the top of my head. some plots i’m open for multiple characters to fill, unless it has been crossed out. and ofc, i’m always open to new ideas too!
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reddeadmort · 5 years
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Hmm dunno if you do modern Arthur ones but I'd love a modern or time-travelling Arthur reacting to snapchat filters. Can includes other gang members too, whomever you feel like writing.
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Thank you for being so patient @nordic-breeze ! This started as just a general Arthur and social media, but then kind of accidentally evolved into a slight commentary of issues that women sometimes face. Not too sure on this one, but I hope it’s along the lines of what you were hoping for :) 
If anyone wants a bit of background reading/scene setting, I wrote some HC’s for my take on Modern Arthur - they can be found here. 
Btw, the catcalls/comments are real ones, taken from videos on youtube. And, tbh, they are some of the milder ones that feature.
Modern Arthur x f! reader | “Surely that’s enough photos now….”
Guidance: Minor fluff, protective Arthur, catcalling/sexual comments/threats
Words: 2.1k
“I just….. I don’t understand? Why do I need to be in the picture, surely it’s the skyline they want to see?”
Arthur was standing in the doorway of your balcony, facing away from you, looking out over the city. He was topless, leaning against the door frame with his arms and ankles crossed.
“Arthur, they’re following you to see YOU, not some boring modern buildings” you chuckled, as you took yet another photo.
You’d waited a while before introducing Arthur to the concept of social media; you didn’t really use it all that much yourself. You quite enjoyed using Snapchat, it was an easy way to keep up to date with your friends back home. Arthur had asked what you were doing during one of your selfie sessions sat next to him on the sofa; you’d shown him some of filters, but they completely befuddled him. 
When you’d flicked on the flower crown, he’d looked frantically between your head and the face on the screen, muttering “but there’s nothing there…” to himself. He’d practically jumped over the back of the couch when you’d done a face swap with him; it was all a bit too much. He’d spent the rest of the evening in a bit of a confused grump, occasionally pausing Netflix to ask a question -  “why do people want to take so many pictures of their own face”, “why do they change how you look so much” “why would you want to look like a dog”. You tried explaining that it was just a bit of fun, but knew when a concept was a lost cause.
Arthur was much happier to help you out with your Instagram. You didn’t post that often, mostly nice photos you’d taken on your treks. But Arthur enjoyed helping you with pictures, and the man did have an artistic flair; he’d gotten pretty good at framing the photos. He’d even started taking some pictures of his work building treehouses, mostly just to show you. Eventually, you managed to persuade him that posting these to Instagram might help promote his business; he’d agreed, but only under the proviso that you dealt with the actual posts/timings/hashtags etc. You had got a few good leads for his work through Instagram, but those jobs were mostly for rich families that had more money than sense. Arthur didn’t love doing these projects, they always ended being more 4 bedroom houses on stilts than rustic treehouses, but they did mean that he could afford to do builds for local charities at less than cost price.
But you knew that the main reason people followed Arthur was for Arthur, no matter how beautiful his work was. And so here you were, once again making him reluctantly pose for yet another picture.
“There we go, plenty to choose from now. You’re free to go now Arthur.” He let out an audible sigh of relief as he walked over to you to have a look at what you’d taken.
“I really don’t see why this is a good picture. All you can see is me pretty much.” Arthur shook his head. “Those ones that fella took of animals back in my time were much better”.
“Arthur, I’ve got 4 words for you: shoulder to waist ratio.”
“I’ll pretend I know what that means” he grunted as he pulled his t-shirt back on over his head. It had a Thor design on it; Arthur had become quite keen on Marvel. That photo you’d posted on your Instagram of him messing around, pretending to pull something out of the ground (copying the first Thor film), had got thousands of likes, despite you only having a few hundred followers. It was at that point you’d decided to set up his own account.
“Anyway Y/N, we best be goin’ to the gym if we want to eat before bed.”
“Yeh, good point, I’ll go grab my stuff.” You went to grab your workout bag with your clothes in from your bedroom as Arthur went and got changed into his, then started the short walk to the gym. As you walked, you chatted, then Arthur asked you a question.
“Here, Y/N, how come you don’t wear your gym clothes? Why’d ya always get changed there? We only live a few streets away.”
“Because, Arthur, I don’t like the attention I get. It’s not so bad when we walk together, but if I’m by myself…. It makes me uncomfortable. It can be pretty bad even if I’m not wearing my workout stuff.”
“I don’t understand? What attention?” 
Sighing, you came to a stop, looking around.
“Look, Arthur, see that group of lads sat outside that shop?” you pointed up the street. “I see them a lot. I hear them a lot. Just walk behind me a bit, close enough to hear what they say, not so close that they think we’re together.”
“Alright, but I don’t really know why. They usually don’t say anything to me.”
“Arthur, that’s because you’re not a… never mind, just follow and listen, okay? And only listen. Whatever you hear, DON’T do anything, promise?”
Arthur grunted as you walked off, then followed behind as instructed. As you suspected, even though you weren’t wearing your gym leggings and sports top, the lads quickly took notice of you.
“Hey what’s up girl, how you doin’!”
“Smile baby!”
“That’s a gorgeous ass, I’d like to hold you down while I slap it”
“Hey bitch, we’re complimenting you, you should thank us!”
You controlled your breathing and continued to walk at a steady pace, stopping in a doorway further up the street so Arthur could catch up. When he did, he looked furious.
“I’m gonna kill ‘em.” He muttered through clenched teeth.
“Arthur, you can’t. And anyway, there’s like 6 of them and one of you. Let’s not get you arrested or killed, alright?”
“But…. they shouldn’t be sayin’ those things (Y/N)! It ain’t right.” You could see him clenching and unclenching his fists.
“No Arthur, it isn’t. And I hate that because of men like them I’ve changed my behaviour and changed what I wear. But I do it to try and make myself feel safer, cause one day, someone may do more than just say things.”
Arthur wrapped his large arms around you and hugged you tight. “I’m sorry (Y/N), sorry that I didn’t understand.”
“It’s alright Arthur, now come on, we want to get to the gym while it’s not too busy.”
Arthur was quieter than normal as you walked the rest of the way – you could tell he was mulling things over. Being yanked from his time into the modern world had made him a bit naïve; it baffled him that 100 or so years later, some of the same issues still existed. 
——-
Arthur was indeed thinking about what he’d heard, but he was also thinking about what he himself had said in the past. Some of those off-hand comments to prostitutes in the saloons, things he’d said to Karen when she’d been drunk…….
You thought he was a good man, and here and now he’d done nothing to prove you wrong, but every so often a memory of his past would float up, reminding him of the things he used to do. But he’d been given a second chance - this time, he was determined to do better.
—–
You had a good workout; you always did with Arthur. You would chat and laugh together, and he was always great at motivating and encouraging you. You helped out each other’s routines where you could, but one thing you could not do was spot him. For god’s sake, the man benched way more than you even weighed. When it came time for this part of his workout, you left him with some of the other gym guys he’d grown friendly with and went to do your cardio. You didn’t love running on a treadmill, but in the city it was really the only option.
You were in your own little world when you noticed a man stood to your side talking to you. He was smiling at you; you took your headphones out, assuming he wanted to ask how much longer you’d be.
“Hello gorgeous.” Those words, from someone you didn’t know, gave you chills. “I’d love to give you some tips.”
“I’m alright thanks” you said as you gave a slight smile. It was one that you’d carefully crafted over the years; not quite big enough to encourage someone, not too small as to risk being called rude.
“No, sweetcheeks, you realllllly need my help. Here…..” As the man said it, he stepped even closer and put his hand on your back, while you were still jogging.
You slammed the stop on the machine and turned as quickly as you could away from him.
“I said I’m fine, please don’t touch me.” You were forceful, but not loud – you really didn’t want to cause a scene in the middle of the gym.
“Bitch, you need my help. You need teaching a thing or two.” The man grabbed at you again, this time managing to get your wrist. He was big, strong, you tried to pull away but you couldn’t. Sod not causing a scene, you thought, I’m getting this fucker banned.
You were about to scream at the man when suddenly he let you go. This had something to do with the fact that an enraged, sweating Arthur had grabbed him by the front of his shirt and was practically lifting him off the ground. Arthur wasn’t much larger than him, but much stronger; Arthur wasn’t a poser, he worked out for strength, relaxation, not definition.
“I think the lady said she’s fine without you goddammit” he snarled into the man’s face.
“What the fuck do you care buddy” the man retorted back, pushing Arthur away. “Me and this bitch need to do some more talking.” This man either had balls of steel or was a complete moron. You suspected the latter; a case of more muscles than brain cells.
“No, mister, me and you need to do some talkin’. And I think my friends might want to help with that.“ The man paled as he finally looked past Arthur.
Turning, you saw what he’d just seen; 3 of Arthur’s gym friends, each of them the same size or even larger than Arthur. You knew these guys, they were always polite, always happy to help you when some other arsehole had left some massive weights on a stand you wanted to use. And, as an added bonus, one of them was the gym’s manager.
“I’ll finish this with you another time girly” the man hissed at you, before quickly turning and walking away as Arthur took a step forwards.
“No he bloody won’t. Y/N, I’m so sorry about this, I’ll go and get him revoked right away” said the manager. “I’ll also make sure that the office send round his picture to all the local gyms, try and stop him doing it elsewhere. If you want me to ring someone, just say.” You nodded and smiled, as the others went back to what they were doing. Arthur stayed with you, checking your wrist.
“You alright (Y/N)? I’m sorry for intervenin’, I know ya could’ve handled him, I just saw red. Especially after what you showed me earlier.”
“Yeh, I’m fine, thanks Arthur” you smiled at him as he rubbed your bruised wrist. “I just wish it wasn’t something I had to deal with, you know?”
“Yeh, I know. I just don’t understand why nothin’ much has really changed. At least back with the gang I could deal with someone that did stuff like this properly.” As you looked into his eyes, you could see that glimmer of animalistic rage that appeared occasionally. Arthur had done well to adjust to modern life, but you knew that sometimes he struggled with not being able to fight his way out of situations. It had worked well for him for years back in his time - to a point anyway.
“Come on Arthur, why don’t we go and do a little bit on the punching bags to cool off. We can take a few more pictures.”
Arthur groaned. “Surely we’ve got enough pictures already?”
“Stop your whining, I know you secretly love the attention.” You jokingly stuck your tongue out out him. “Tell you what, I’ll treat you to dinner on the way back after, to say thanks for being my big burly cowboy.” You knew Arthur liked it when you called him a cowboy, it always made him laugh and think of some of those ridiculous films.
“Sound’s like a plan, Y/N. As long as I getta choose.”
“So, Five Guys again then.” Arthur grinned as you sighed, smiling, and went to finish your workout.
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alchemist-shizun · 5 years
Text
As expected, Dealing with intrusive thoughts is now one of my favorites
Here I come with almost all of my reactions on the episode, even though I tagged the spoiler warnings I put everything under the cut just in case. Enjoy the emotional rollercoaster while I'll probably go and rewatch it again.
Okay kinda expected one or two of the warnings but all of them together what is gonna happen???? (Though they make sense after reading the title)
HELLO FRESH BACK AGAIN
"I'm awesome and I can do this" there goes my boy. *said boy falls flat on the floor* ...come on
I felt that yawn bc I stayed up all night waiting for the video but it dropped at 8 am, I'm an idiot who should've gotten more sleep
"help me" why is he such a mood "everything is going wrong in my life" same but YOU SHOULDN'T SAY THAT LET ME HUG YOU
They're all sinking up so fast god I missed my bois. Also the general awkwardness of Virge and Pat, greeeeat something will go wrong
Virgil just ignoring everything and touching the railing, a mood
ALSO PLEASE LET ROMAN IN THE SITUATION
SECRET SECRETS ARE NO FUN TELL ME NOW OR ELSE WE'RE DONE
wait why does Ro want to be deeply troubled- man are you okay-
LOGAN'S HERE
"your most extreme reaction is an eyebrow raise" "FALSEHOOD" "I stand corrected" omfg
"what are you ta- what are you talking- what are you talking about?" I loved that whole take it made me feel complete
"Look I barely got any sleep" this can apply to a lot of us and I love just how we're all always like "TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF" but in the end this is where we all end up anyway
Okay I'm very curious about these troubling thoughts though
"so sushi" FUCCC I DIED RIGHT THERE
"Don't act like that was an accident" "everybody, Virgil. Let's give it up for the Purp Man" these speak for themselves. Also the purp man is my new fav nickname and I'm gonna use it.
4:17 Patton is adorable bye
"if you continue to push this we're going to end up in really dangerous territory" AND THAT'S WHERE THE TENSION STARTED TO BUILD UP
great flick
"am I delirious or is this the funniest video I've ever made" I felt that
YOU HIGH-JOCKED
okay but when Thomas starts disassociating I also feel really weird like as if there was something blocking my own hearing for real?? And not just the audio edited like that?? Maybe I'm just too tired
WHAT WHO WHHH first intrusive thought making its way what is gonna happen
OH MY GOD ROMAN WATCH OUT ALSO THAT'S DEFINITELY A NEW DARK SIDE OR SMTH LIKE THAT
W HO THE FUCKLKDSL IS THAT A MOUSTACHE IS THAT GLITTER WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HE WEARING WHAT IS HE DOING THERE PLEASE- okay but he looks crazy af I like that
"-evIL" "-SHOW UP"
First time I watched the scene where Ro gets knocked out I literally just screamed "ROMAN" in a high pitched sound I was shook wtf my bOY
Patton and Thomas's yells in unison plus "YOU KILLED HIM" I just I JUST
"Ah, he's the Duke" "....... boo" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Okay but his voice is so on point with his character portrayal he's so weird it's awesome?
SONG SONG SONG and oh goodness the visuals I can't fathom how much editing work must have gone through this, they're all so talented.
"aunt patty naked" A G AI N??
"IM GONNA WHIP YOUR BUTT"
a snaKE IT'S DECEIT oh my these silouhettes are so great this is my favorite scene
this is gonna be stuck in my head all day
THE COOL MIRROR EDIT.
god i hate him so much already but i'm super intrigued he's so chaotic the whole team made a wonderful job i'll never stop saying this
"i'm really stupid right now" just how much out of context relatable content are we going to get on this fine day?
omg the dark version of creativity, which can be associated with intrusive thoughts, that's very clever
THE JUICY STUFF DANCE
"Repression can be very bad indeed" I mean he's right tbh it leads to never solving the problem at all
GO LOGAN GO HAVE YOUR TIME TO SHINE FINALLY i missed him
"i can't hear youuuuuu" much like "I don't understand what you're saying I don't know anything about words" THE DARK SIDES ARE ALL SASSY LITTLE BITCHES
pattonnnn did a real good job
THE BRAVE HANDSOME UNBEATABLE ROMAN and mashed potatoes
"scary" and Virgil just gives Thomas a look idk I live on the little details (Im ten minutes into the vid and look how long this post already is)
GEE Remus (already using his name bc it's shorter) looking so offended at the label and then pointing out it should be a Virgil problem whAT DOES THIS MEAN IM SHAKING
WHY WOULD HE BE DECEIT AGAIN IM DYING. "Idk if you guys can tell but I'm a little silly"
"then why are you lying" no everybody I don't need angst
THE BLACK AND THE WHITE THEORY I SAW GOING AROUND good job to whoever thought of that
JOAN
the forbidden dance
INTO A BUTTHOLE WHAT IS IT WITH HIM AND BUTTHOLES
there u go thomas said it too
haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate FHDSLAKLFD
irresponsible parenting, Logan completing the parental unit of the sides
"maybe there's hope for you after all!" me looking at all my wips
REMUS' LAUGH IS PERFECT. also "BITCH WHAT IS *YOUR* DEAL"
"you've never been one to soften the truth" OH BOI HERE WE GO
"do we have some case of brain swap???" I legitly said "maybe" in unison with Patton the first time
Vee pls stop putting Thommy boy down he's having a bad time
Logan trying to put some sense into the situation is my only spark of hope for this to turn back good
REMUS IS SO DRAMATIC
That lick was ....... let's pretend it never happened
"you know who can help us with that???" DECEIT'S SONG COMING UP that was great, imagine the chaos that the duo would create
"THATS WHAT REPRESSION IS?"
gasp Remus trying to make Virgil angry at Logan shall not stand DON'T PUT THEM AGAINST ONE ANOTHER HE'S JUST TRYING TO HELP
"you all are not listening to Thomas" this is the development I needed
"you're just para-" and he cuts himself. You all know what I'm talking about. Foreshadowing probably? This happened too back then when Roman was almost calling him the same. And then Virge looks so hurt I- "thank you for being on guard" that made me want to cry idk
the whole speech Logan gave? Pure gold. That was perfect.
HE SAID FIGURATIVELY *CLAP CLAP CLAP*
"UH RECORD SCRATCH?"
"does this make me cool?" djslagrkglhf also the teeth thing right after what the
... the deodorant eating ...
DUKEY
The first time I watched I thought his name was spelled Remis that's how dumb my Italian ass is
Still I love his name bc I'm a nerd for ancient culture, ESPECIALLY Roman (and ancient Greek but it isn't mentioned here) and I love the little thing they did with both Creativity names, super clever and very much liked on my part.
"I would never hide anything from you" and he looks at Virgil JUST ALL THIS FORESHADOWING
LOGAN SHOWING HIS TEETH BACK UP
"how about you shut up" Roman what the hecc man
THAT THING INTO LOGANS HEAD UNSETTLED ME A BIT
what are they doing to him today let him rest
double blow
"can we logic our way out of that?" everybody nodding was so pure
"shit"
THAT FUCKING JUMPSCARE I'M SORRY WHAT THE FU
"not all thoughts are meaningful"
He's go- no he's back again
THE CALLBACK MENTION AND PATTONS REACTION... probable foreshadowing to what Joan said about there being a part two of SvS?
"When are you actually gonna jump out of a moving car I've been bringing it up for years" so it's not just me..?
"it is okay if the thought happens to cross your mind"
"everything is okay" I'm going to cry I needed that
I love how Logan touches the topic that there is no problem in seeking help from therapists. There's a lot to say on this, but I was really glad that was pointed out since the are a lot of stereotypes on the matter
why did Virgil look like he was about to cry
Patton I love you
Thomas going to rest is what everyone wanted to see
Virgil confronting Remus I'm living you're doing amazing sweetie
"you tickle me emo"
"it was just like old times" then Pat and Lo's looks in this essay I will
ROMAAAAN
VIRGILS SMILE
"YOU'RE ALIVE"
"I LOVE YOU" ME TOO!! ME TOO ME TOO
"are you good?" "are you hurt at all?" I love when the sides look out for each other
"I'm sorry Logan" right through the heart. Another development.
I need y'all to look at Virgil in this exact second because. he.
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that's my point.
All those smiles while Logan's talking are making me alive
"No seriously, you're ... really ... cool" I started tearing up right here. Twice. And then Logan sinks down cause he's not at all used to this and he's feeling t h i n g s please keep on being appreciated you deserve it
Also Patton always learning from his mistakes and understanding them when he does something wrong or he thinks in the wrong direction, that's something I think a lot of people need to learn, including myself. Like, it's okay to be wrong and make mistakes, just do your best to make sure you're improving yourself afterwards, instead of dwelling on it too much
"I don't like him" makes two of us
"Soooo you have a brother?" oh boy
The m i r r o r it's making me cry
"He's gone now and he's never coming back!" "I don't think that's-" "BYEE" what was all that talk about repression for if you contiNUE TO DO THIS ROMAN please I beg of you let us hELP YOU he's making me die inside
Oh boi the big moment. I already expected a bomb to drop since Virgil was the last one remaining.
"You okay buddy?" "Huh?" op somehow was already found crying
"I'm a little disappointed in myself" istg all that foreshadowing mixed with me wanting to hug him
The music picking up tension, this is poetic cinema let me tell you
I noticed how he calls them "the others", all these tiny details is what I'm living for
"I should know better" I couldn't beLIEVE IT, also how he seemed to be so frustrated made something inside me break
the pause and then "Because I was one of them", the music stops for a second, a little second in which you can hear my distant screaming "GOSH HE SAID IT IT WAS TRUE"
Thomas is speechless and just stares at him while the music picks up again and then Virgil's sigh and expression sinking down like "there you have it. that's the truth. and you can't do anything about it" he looks so defeated I'm breaking down.
Did I already mention poetic cinema? I just love angst and this scene was perfect
First time watching I, too, barely understood anything I was listening to in the last parte because all of that was really a lot to take in.
"Those thoughts that you may have thought do not define you"
"[the thought] may simply be that we are really okay"
"Go to bed!" me
no im not in the mood for food because for some unfathomable reason I had anxiety before the video dropped yay me
WHY ARE U DRINKING RED WINE WITH THAT DISH
GAVIN BEST BOY EVER
and last but not least: are you fucking serious Remus
THERE'S A SNAKE IN MY BUTT FANDFKJL
I didn't expect this topic at all and I am so glad it was talked about, thankfully my intrusive thoughts do not bother me as much as I realized other people's do. And I never saw anyone talking about this before, which is why it makes this video so important. I saw a tweet recently about someone saying that it is okay if you think about weird things, the important is that you never act on them, that's what makes you a good person. But I think this video really explains it far better and I never realized how common something like this was? So yeah another time in which I've been educated and couldn't be happier about it. These people really are bringing light to the world gah I LOVE THEM.
oKAY guess I'm done this was a wild ride and yeah I tend to point out EVERYTHING, so here you have it, as I already mentioned if you feel the need to geek out too, I'm here for ANYBODY! (pls I have no friends)
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drunklander · 5 years
Text
Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander
Thoughts on Ep. 413
I’ve been singing Jefferson’s “The emperor has no clothes.” line from Washington on Your Side all day. Because honestly, that’s basically how I feel about Outlander at this point. Obviously every season when the press tour rolls around the cast and crew are going to talk about how it’s their best season yet and yada yada talking point bullshit. And in the segments after each episode they’re obviously going to pat themselves on the back for being so fucking brilliant. But I have to ask, are they delusional and believe what they’re saying? Or are they self-aware enough to realize that they’ve been putting out a worse and worse product every year but they’re contractually obligated to only say good things about the show? (I’m not stupid, I know that regardless of what they really think about the show they’re putting out, they’re never actually going to say it’s not good. That’s not how this works.) Some, like Balfe, I think are aware that the show isn’t what it used to be. And some, like Matt and Toni, I really think believe they’re doing a good job.
But as long as they keep spouting off the same nonsense about how everything is awesome, a certain segment of the fandom will keep agreeing that the emperor’s new clothes are indeed amazing, while I’m just over here like uh, y’all realize he’s nekkid, right?
Anywho, I’m really looking forward to a very long hiatus.
As much as I tend to not like the title cards anymore, this one included, Otter Tooth being like oh fuck this white kid in his racist costume is valid af.
I do appreciate that they show the Mohawk playing lacrosse in this episode and in 4x12. Because as much as it’s associated with prep school white boys today, it was invented and played by Native American and First Nations tribes, including the Mohawk.
(I signed up to play lacrosse in high school thinking that girls’ lacrosse was like boys’ lacrosse, but it’s not. You can’t check or anything. Lame.)
These fuckers are really bad negotiators. Like hey, we *really* want this guy. Like we’re desperate to get this guy. We didn’t just give you the upper-est of upper hands in this negotiation. Nope.
Tehwahsehwke brushing off the stuff they brought to trade with as just trinkets for Roger gives me life.
Has Claire been wearing this stone all season? You’d think they would have shown her wearing it more or something. But why would they do that when it can just pop up again out of nowhere.
Also, like, why the fuck would you wear a stone you found by the skull you think belongs to a Native American ghost dude who was hatchet’ed in the back of the head to a Native American village. Like, sure she doesn’t know the connection yet, but like, seems like something you’d maybe want to leave at home.
Also who the fuck are you guys, Frasers, refusing to leave someone else’s village when asked? You’re in no position to make demands. I know you want Roger back for some reason that I will never understand, because he’s the worst (only partly being sarcastic), but you’re the fuckers who sold him away so... Just leave and come up with Plan B, don’t make everyone hate you on the way out.
Oh the irony that the racist af term is “Indian giver” when it’s the white folks who go back on their deals...
Murtz being indignant about Bree and Lord John’s engagement makes me mad all over again that we were robbed over his reaction to Jamie marrying Laoghaire.
They’re like really leaning into the benevolent slave owner bullshit, and it’s gross, tbh. Like Bree’s just totally chill being waited on by an enslaved person. This show is killing meee.
Claire making demands and Wahkatiiosta being like “bitch, please” gives me life. Like Claire, you fucking idiot, you’re really not in a position to make demands right now.
Otter Tooth really is a tragic figure. I’d say it’s weird to spend this much time on someone that’s already dead (Just to set up Donner? I’m assuming that’s why they’re doing it?), but honestly, giving the Mohawk something to do that’s not about white people is fine with me.
Really Claire, you have all these opinions about ghosts? Since when?
(Since eventually they need to explain Jamie’s ghost. So why weave in ghost-related mythology organically when you can randomly shoehorn it in with a line that makes everyone scratch their head.)
“Not one of my finer moments.” Understatement of the season, Bree. Seriously, wtaf. And putting in this meta line doesn’t make it better.
“Da told me I should forgive him.” I hate that she was doing things because someone told her she should instead of because she wanted to. Because, again, Bonnet doesn’t deserve forgiveness. Part of forgiving someone, imo, is that they need to be sorry for the thing that needs forgiving. And Bonnet is not. So fuck that guy, he shouldn’t be forgiven.
“I already have.” In this instance, Jamie at least admitted he fucked up and is trying to fix it, but that’s like the first time something like that has happened. And honestly, I’m looking forward to him continuing to try to be worthy of this forgiveness she’s granting him. Because if next season starts with them just being buddy buddy, I’m gonna roll my eyes a lot.
Uh, why *would* this Mohawk dude let you escape with Roger. He owes these white people nothing. Why on earth wouldn’t he raise the alarm. He’s not the bad guy here.
Oh good god it’s not even half over yet.
I should be feeling things about Jamie and Claire possibly being separated again, but the show has managed to make them so meh this season that I really can’t be bothered to give a fuck, tbh.
Also, like, we’ve seen them say goodbye like it might be forever so many times already that like it’s kind of losing its meaning if we don’t also see them being *together* like they’re on borrowed time. Which we haven’t this season.
I miss caring about Claire and Jamie. Make me care about them again, show. This season was supposed to be them building a life together and enjoying finally being married and settled and knowing that every minute together is precious because it’s one they never thought they’d have. And somehow the show instead made them secondary characters in their own story to the point where this moment isn’t even evoking a reaction from me.
Young Ian really hasn’t had much to do all season, but what he has been given has been good and I love him a lot. And major props to him for being like yeah, I fucked up, I’m owning it, I’m gonna apologize and I’m gonna be the one to stay. Take note, literally every other dude in this show, be more like Young Ian.
Although, man, as much as I love the growth Young Ian goes through in the books, it’s gonna be so... problematic, to put it lightly, to have a white kid cosplaying as a Mohawk for the rest of the series when we’ve never had a fully developed Mohawk character.
Murtagh’s whole speech to Jocasta can directly translated to our current trash fire of an administration not being able to grasp what the federal employees they furloughed were going through during the shutdown. But this isn’t a political show. Nope.
Yes, I know that this was all written and shot months ago. But discussing privilege and and using your privilege for good is also political.
Murtagh’s pretty chill about Jocasta owning people for someone who was indentured for years.
As great as Murcasta is as a ship name, I don’t ship it. I’m here for them being inappropriate fuckbuddies, but she’s a fucking slave owner and he’s a Regulator. So hard pass on going full Duncan Innes here.
Also it’s cute that the producers were like this is a brand new idea because in the books, Murtagh’s dead! It’s like guys, you don’t get originality points for giving a canon book plot line to a different character.
Also I swear to fuck, they’d better not do the Jocasta is secretly having a relationship with Ulysses. Because not only is that fucked up on its own, but now if she’s banging Murtz, it makes her even more garbage, because not only does she enslave people, and bangs someone she technically owns, but she’s also a cheater.
Also, is Jocasta only against sex outside of marriage for women who have never been married before? (And I specify women since Murtagh has never been married and she’s not giving him any shit...) Or is she only against it if it results in a pregnancy?
“Jenny will be totally cool with this. Yup. Jenny will totally get it and be absolutely fine with this whole situation.” Are you fucking kidding me?
Jamie deserves all of these punches, but Roger remains the worst.
The difference between Young Ian running the gauntlet and Roger running the gauntlet is striking. Young Ian knows that this is his one chance to prove himself to the Mohawk and he is not throwing away his shot.
Young Ian smiling when the Mohawk accept him is like the only thing in this episode that makes me feel things. Because like this kid is the youngest of a whole squad of siblings and has always been the awkward one who gets into shenanigans accidentally, so like it’s really nice to see him being accepted into a group on his own merits.
“Because she said terrible things and turned ye against me.” Weird way to say “because she told you the truth about how awful I am and made you realize that I am, in fact, the actual worst,” Roger.
He’s never going to apologize, is he. Of course not.
“How could you think such a thing?” “Well, you see, my daughter apparently doesn’t care enough about you to tell me anything about who you are. And you’re enough of a dick that her servant thought you were a rapist. Because, you *are* a dick. And I’m enough of an asshat that I sell into slavery first and never ask questions later because lol toxic masculinity is grand.”
“I left because she told me to go. She actually told me not to come in the first place. And I was an asshole to her in our own time. And then I was an asshole again to her in this time. And really I should just fuck all the way off because I’m the worst and she deserves better and has made it clear that she isn’t down for how I’m treating her. But nope. Why do that when we can forget she ever had any issues with me so I can play the victim card forever and then get welcomed back into her life no problem.”
“But even then, I came back for her. Even though, again, she made it clear she didn’t want me.”
I hate Roger so much. He is literally more worked up over the fact that it was fucking Bonnet who raped Bree and how Bonnet made him sail to Philly than he is about Bree being raped. What the actual fuck, bro.
“Somewhere between here and Fraser’s Ridge. You know, casually somewhere on the eastern seaboard. Really narrows it down.”
“I don’t think you can go through with a child.” They keep saying that but like they have no proof of it? Are they really just saying it so much to set up them doing just that in season six?
In this instant, Frank 2.0 is worse than the OG twatwaffle. Don’t worry, Frank is still the actual worst. He’s an emotionally abusive fuckwad and I hate him with the passion of a thousand fiery suns. But Roger here isn’t dealing with someone who left and fell in love with someone else and is having the child of the love of her life. He’s dealing with someone who was violently raped and is choosing to keep the child and love it on its own merits. And he’s fucking hesitating about whether or not he can live with that?! Are you fucking kidding me? Go fuck yourself, Roger. And then fuck all the way off. Because Bree already deserves better, but the fact that you need to fucking think about it, like she’s somehow not worthy of your love because of what she went through, is fucking irredeemable. 
I. Hate. Roger.
ALSO! Can we fucking talk for a second about how they’re making Bree’s rape and pregnancy about fucking Roger? Not omg is she ok, not omg how is she coping, not omg is she getting the care and support she needs. No, none of that. Instead we get fucking “are you, a man, ok with this.”
But since we’re apparently making this all about good ol’ Rog. He literally two fucking minutes ago called Bree his wife. Like in sickness and health, richer or poorer, no matter fucking what, married. I know he didn’t fucking think he was going to stay in the past forever or to become a parent in this way, but guess what? LIFE IS FUCKING FULL OF SURPRISES. SHIT DOESN’T ALWAYS GO ACCORDING TO PLAN. YOU WANT TO SAY YOU’RE MARRIED TO BREE? THEN NUT UP OR SHUT UP, MISTER “I WANT ALL OF YOU.”
I HATE THIS FUCKING SHOW SO MUCH.
“And we will choose his birthday wisely, but ye can be sure the lad was born in wedlock.” Oh fuck off, Jocasta.
Thank fuck this season is over because the are they/aren’t they married whiplash about the handfasting is annoying af. Literally one scene ago Roger was saying she’s his wife and now they’re lying about birthdays because she’s not married.
Ok this is shallow but did they decide that Sophie could wear makeup this season and Caitriona could only have the bare minimum to try to make the age gap seem bigger? Because honestly, the difference in their faces is quite noticeable. 
Unpopular opinion alert, but I’m totally fine with Claire and Jamie not being there for the baby’s birth. I mean, I’m kind of sad Claire wasn’t there. But she can be there for the next one. But like, Jamie hasn’t earned being with Bree in such a personal moment. Their relationship isn’t at that level.
“We told him everything. But since he’s the worst and loves the *idea* of you and not *you*, the truth was too much for his imaginary version of your relationship so he bounced. Like an asshole.”
We’re gonna be stuck with Bonnet for two more seasons, aren’t we. Ugh. They could have just killed him and been done with it, because honestly he’s not interesting enough to keep around, but the more they keep talking about how he died in the prison, the more it’s basically guaranteed that he’s going to show back up...
I’m glad Claire and Bree get a moment alone, tbh. But Bree will be “surrounded by family” at the Ridge? Really? Because pretty sure it’ll just be you and Jamie now. Since Ian is gone. And Roger went AWOL. And who knows where Murtz is gonna go...
They really love using no dialogue dinners instead of doing actual work on the characters’ relationships with each other this season, don’t they. Le sigh.
Cool that everyone is super down with Jocasta now. Because clearly ep. 4x02 didn’t happen.
Oh ffs. The literally did a running toward each other and meeting in the middle with a hug shot. Fucking kill me.
Ok, so Bree and Roger had a kind of flirty friendship that was basically just based around them both knowing about time travel. And then they sort of did the long distance relationship thing. And then Roger proposed in the most awful way possible, refused to listen to Bree’s very reasonable response, slut-shamed her for being ok with sex before marriage even though he himself had had sex before, was a dick to her when she tried to have another conversation with him, and then he followed her into the past when she expressly said not to and implied that she wasn’t planning to stay in the past permanently. Then we’re somehow expected to just accept that she’s over all of her reservations about marriage and Roger being the worst when she agrees to handfast with him, but then he’s the worst again and she rightly tells him to fuck off. And then he can’t decide if he can accept a woman he “loves” after she’s been raped?! And now we’re supposed to think that they belong together and should get the cheesiest, most cliché shot of all time? Are you fucking kidding me, show? How the fuck are we supposed to ship this?
Roger is the literal worst.
This isn’t earned at all and I hate it.
Also, wtf is up with this ending? Why not end it with Bree and Roger going back into the house?
Although, Claire’s face when Murcasta are forehead fucking is my everything.
Like there’s no reason to end on a cliffhanger that’s not even really a cliffhanger? Because like, we already know that Tryon was eventually going to call in this favor from Jamie? We’ve known this since they accepted the land grant? And like, the tension between Jamie and Murtagh over being a Regulator is already established and clearly Jamie isn’t going to actually kill Murtagh?
This is dumb. This show is bad. Thank fuck it’s Droughlander.
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ygsneglectedchild · 5 years
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YG Treasure Box Rant ep. 2
yoyoyo! It’s ya girl and I am drunk and I am angry.. and sad and downright pissed. So here I am, ranting about everything that’s good and bad but mostly bad about YG Treasure Box.
YG Introduced J Team to his Korean trainees and Yedam, that intellectual Bang Yedam, commented on how there is already a bunch of trainees in the first place. Why in the seven hells of Kpop did he bring those trainees that are tbh in perfectly good condition on their own to debut in Japan? Why?
Team J was scouted in their early years and have been in the Japanese branch of the dungeon for ages. Did y’all know YG has trainees at YG Japan? I thought the deal was just to debut Korean artists via their partnership with Avex but boy was I wrong
They asked Team J to learn KOREAN... a Japanese group of boys to study Kpop in their own country where they could have perfectly debuted as a Jpop group with a Korean brand of marketing and promotion. What exactly is YG Japan’s Business Plan?
To be honest, YG Japan and YG Team A/Silver Boys should have been pitted against each other rather. Storylines that could have happened if Raesung and Noa are on the show:
Producing Battle - Millenium vs. Asahi
Japanese vs. Japanese - Noa vs. a fellow Japanese Trainee
Yedam VS. Keita - instead of Yedam X Keita
Haruto vs. BEX - Let’s be honest, GON was literally edited out of YGTB and was made a total nuisance :(
Junkyu crying in the corner after TEAM J’s bit was heartbreaking
Battle of the Visuals aka when all of Korea shat on the trainees for not being Kim Jinwoo level
These kids talking about their jawlines make me choke.
Choi Hyunsuk said that they only picked Junkyu to build his confidence is salty AF. I stan.
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I think Kim Junkyu’s personality is more attractive than his face.. tbh.
The moment when YG mentioned that Haruto’s mom is a Bigbang fan.. he is a shoo-in.. like seriously, guaranteed his debut right then and there. Side note: I want to grow up like his mom and I can’t wait till she meets G-Dragon, SOL, TOP and definitely D-Lite,
Seungri gave such mature advice to Haruto, I cry. Seungska for president!
Haruto’s rap: his palms are sweaty.. meeting Seungri was heavy, before heading to Korea, had Mom’s Spaghetti
Hartuto’s bit was supe long.. I wish they had equal screentime for everyone. Like who dafuq is Seokhwa and that guy who grocery shopped with Yedam in the XMAS V-live.. who???
Haruto’s confidence about his looks is a bit obnoxious but he ain’t lying so I can’t fault him for anything.
YG got a massive boner for Haruto’s rap. 
Kim Junkyu’s eye-rolling after YG made his assessment is a goddamn mood
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It died, along with that Mixnine debut group you said you will debut you bastard...
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Did he die? I bet this was Hyunsuk’s idea..
Also, just by watching this, I hope YG knows the mental effect that he has with people who look up to him. He is toxic.
Also, after the bullying that Junkyu got.. YG gave him a goddamn LANYARD? or was it a Belt? or Bag Handle? wtf
YG gave trainees breadcrumbs for working hard
Dance battle.........
Kim Doyoung is a prodigy that needs to be protected. The casting director got more screentime than him.
Kotaro is super light on his feet, but I like it better when he does the small footwork..
Rap Battle...
Show me the Trainee... 
Choi Hyunsuk is super good but I agree with YG when he said that Hyunsuk looks goddamn weird when he lowers his chin... in thew trainee days, and also YG was also right that the lyrics and the rap should go first before the gestures but damn.. the way YG said it was so frustrating.
Junhyuk - This kid has swag
YG has planned the Hyunsuk vs Junhyuk battle from this episode. YOU CAN TELL IT WAS A SETUP.
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The whole mood of the program tbh
Vocal Audition AKA the battle of YG’s favs
Jyunhao is so good and raw, YG shouldn’t ruin that. I will slap a bitch if they do,
Kim Seunghun’s Station of the Cross.. like this is where all the shitfest started for him.
Lee Midam had all the reasons to run away tbh. He flubbed a performance that he most likely got shat on for off cam. I used to sing in public when I was a teenager and I had a hard time adjusting with my lowered tone so my voice cracked numerous times in public. It was not a good feeling to have and I can’t fault him for fleeing.
Yedam vs. Jeongwoo is ANOTHER SETUP fucking hell. Yedam is a pizza that’s ready to go out of the oven.. you just have to put him in a pretty box. Jeongwoo still needs to have pineapples removed but he’s on his way. He is super good and the feeling that he gets when he sings is so evident even to the listener.
Blackswan should be a group song and should be included in Treasure’s debut album. 
Hearing Jeongwoo sing When We Were Young is just like that moment when Daesung sang This is the Moment in his drama.
When YG reviews Yedam it feels like he’s still in Kpopstar. He was so kind.. but if it’s Seunghun, it’s downright bullying.
This battle format is fun and all.. but should not have been used for the rankings. The ranking is retarded wtf. They didn’t even give us the criteria. 
This episode is where we found out that there will be no such thing as TRANSPARENCY in this whole program.
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