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bullet-prooflove · 7 months

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Reputation - Donovan Rocker x Reader (NSFW)

Tagging: @oliviah-25 @luckyladycreator2 @crazy4chickennuggets @one-sweet-gubler @janeaustenlover @victoriajhyde @telepathay @genius2050 @irishavengersassemble @crimeshowjunkie

Rocker knows you have a reputation. You’re a good girl, one that follows orders with precision, who always play it safe. In the field no one has to worry about you, you’re solid and dedicated, loyal to a fault. You haven’t got a rebellious bone in your body, at least that’s what they thought.

They didn’t know you the way he did. They haven’t seen that reckless side of you, the one that comes out to play in the depths of the night, they didn’t know you’re secret.

Rocker discovered it by accident. He’d been listless after the divorce, instead of hitting the same old places he wanted something fresh. That’s how he’d come across Noche, a club known for its ambience and music scene. It wasn’t like the other clubs in L.A with the booming beats that makes your skull throb, it’s dark, a hole in the wall shrouded in mystery and the perfect place for him to disappear for an hour or two.

He’d been on his way home after having a couple of beers with Stevens when he heard the serenade of a violin. He wasn’t into classical pieces but the music he was hearing was an entanglement of soft rock, something more his speed. The notes tapered over the drums, touching something deep down inside of him. He was enthralled by it, ensnared. He found himself seated at the bar, another beer in his hand, his attention drawn to the stage. His gaze came to fall on the violinist, head cradled against the instrument, and it was like he had been struck by lightning.

He knew it was you, he would know your stance, your movement, your posture anywhere. You wore a black sheer Victorian style top, with a high collar and long sleeves with a lace bralette underneath. It accentuated your body, showcasing the lines of your form as you swayed in time to the music. The leather trousers clung to your lower body as your hips swung from side to side. It was the first time he’d seen you with your hair down, normally you wore it in a plait or a tight bun but tonight it was gloriously loose. He wondered what it would feel like to run his hands through it, to kiss you on the mouth and smear that red lipstick you wore. Your eyes, always so expressive were framed with dark eyeliner, making you look just as dangerous as he knew you were.

You up on that stage right now, was the sexiest thing damn thing he had ever seen.

The way you played, it was dynamic and passionate. A sensual experience and he couldn’t tear himself away. He had no idea what you did after work, you played your cards close to your chest but he had never expected anything like this. He’d always had an affinity for the darker side of things, his marriage to Val had been pretty vanilla. The two of them had been college sweethearts but there were things he’d wanted to try, things he knew didn’t fit into her puritan view of sex.

He doesn’t realise you’ve noticed him until you appear alongside of him at the bar. Your set is over and he’s been toying with the idea of approaching you or simply slipping out when your hip bumps against his. The sultry scent of your perfume clings to your skin and it just adds to the allure.

“I didn’t think you saw me.” He says to you as you tilt you head towards him.

“You’re a striking man.” You inform him, taking a sip of your water.

He blushes, he can’t help it. No one has ever said that to him, Val used to call him her prince, it reminded of something out of Disney. The way those words roll off your lips, especially the term striking, it does something to him. He isn’t used to this side of you but he likes it.

“You wanna get out of here?” he ventures.

You smile, before tossing your hair back over your shoulder and giving him a look that makes him weak in the knees.

“Are you hitting on me Sergeant?” You ask him.

“How about we drop the titles for tonight?” He requests, setting his beer bottle down on the bar.

That reputation you have as a good girl, it completely goes out of the window. You ruin him that night, with an inquisitive mouth and fingertips that trail over his scars as your thighs hug his hips. You keep him on the cusp, drawing out his ecstasy until his fists grip the sheets and he begs you to let him come.

Not until I do, you had whispered in his ear.

Fuck he’d never had a woman straddle his face before, it was something he had always wanted to try but Val had never been into it, but you…

He had lost his mind when he got his mouth on you, you tasted like candied honey on his tongue, he’d taken you apart slowly, learning what you liked, what made you say his name. You liked it when his tongue delved deep, his palms grasping your thighs to hold you in place. When you climaxed, he didn’t want to stop, he sucks your clit before pinning you against his mouth and ruining you all over again. When he makes you come for a third time, he’s deep inside of you, his fingers threading through your hair as he grips it in his fist and pulls your head back so he can stare into your eyes. There’s intimacy in the eye contact and he watches your face, your lips parting as he makes you say his name.

The next morning, he wakes up alone, tangled up in his sheets with your lipstick marks decorating his skin. He sees you in work and it’s like it never happened, like he doesn’t know you sound like at the height of pleasure or how sinful that mouth of yours really is.

That night he turns up at Noche again, he sees you there up on that stage. You are a force to be reckoned with, a wildfire, untamed and untethered as you play, and he drinks it in. There’s an erotism to what you do, and it taps into something deep down inside of him. He’s like a moth to a flame, he can’t stay away, he doesn’t want to. Instead he clings to the nights that he has you, the ones where you’re his and only his.

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#donovan rocker x reader #donovan rocker x you #donovan rocker #rocker x reader #cbs swat #swat 2017 #swat cbs #swat

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chosenimagines · 1 year

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i have a swat obsession and there is not much about swat out there *sobbs uncontrolably*

and the stuff there is is not much my stuff

AND THERE IS EVEN LESS ABOUT MY BOY TAN AND IT BREAKS MY HEART

#swat #swat 2017 #swat cbs #cbs swat #s.w.a.t. cbs #S.W.A.T #s.w.a.t.#victor tan #swat victor tan #daniel hondo harrelson #david deacon kay #jim street #chris alonso #dominic luca #why why why #i just want to cry #i just want some content about my fav peepz #where is content about my boy?! sob

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kalamataolivesssss · 1 year

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I Won’t Back Down

Luca x female reader

The reader is streets little sister but she is apart of 50 squad with rocker instead of 20 squad with street. And she’s a ray of sunshine always happy but she’s overly reckless while in the field doing whatever she can to save someone else, while she is also Lucas secret crush he’s been pinning over and not telling anyone sense him and street live together in the same house with Chris.

While they weren’t on shift but 50 squad was street had got a call she had jumped over railing on a parking garage lot holding on to a suspect who ended up stabbing her in her side but she didn’t let go of the suspect or the railing and they were getting her to the hospital.

An when they get there they tell them she lost a lot of blood and maybe Luca confesses after when they said they lost her muiltple times an was in surgery after she gets out

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Author Note: Sorry I haven’t done one of these in a second. Work has been killer. I had some inspiration for this one so I’m excited - didn’t mean to make y/n an army vet like the last submission I did - but the girl I’m picturing as y/n is a army vet and it fits the story! deal with it <3. Hope you all enjoy. Thanks for the submission!

I got really into (y/n)’s background here. Sorry not sorry.

Title: I Won’t Back Down - Tom Petty

Warnings: Canon typical violence, loss of blood, Hospitals, recovery, light swearing

Relationships: Luca x reader Protective Brother Jim Street / reader Chris Alonso/Jim Street

Word count: 2583

Y/N “Sunny” Street Background

~~~

After your father was killed, you and Jim were placed in different foster families. Since you were four years younger than him, you don’t remember much of the early days living with your mom or Jimmy. As soon as you turned 17, you decided to join the army to get out of Long Beach, Jim had been in the police academy for a year before that and didn’t have much to say to your decision.

The army was where you got the nickname “Sunny”, cause you were always smiling, even when things were going to shit. And you had the ability to make others laugh and smile with you - something that was treasured on the more difficult days.

After two tours and not re-upping, you settled in San Diego. Deciding to join the police force. It was an easy transition from the Army, and one a lot of service members chose to do. SWAT was never really a goal you had in mind, but you didn’t pass up the opportunity when it was dropped in your lap. And by 27, you had served on the SD Metro SWAT team for just over two years.

Then one day on your way to your apartment, Jim was just sitting on your stoop. Like nothing had happened. Like you both hadn’t missed almost two decades of the other's life. The two of you laughed, cried, and apologized to each other over three bottles of wine and a cold pizza. With promises of doing better by each other from then on.

When you saw an opening at LAPD Metro SWAT you put in a request to transfer, thinking it was a long shot to actually being accepted. You didn’t have anything tying you to San Diego, and you thought it would be good to be closer to Jim again.

—------

Y/N “Sunny” POV

And now, sitting on the bench in the locker room you couldn’t be happier. Two days from now will mark six months since you joined 50 David.

You shucked out of your bullet proof vest, smiling to yourself after your latest success.

“Sunny! (Y/N)! - that was the best time for the obstacle climb in SWAT! That was killer, girl!”

You just smile and thank whoever yelled out the congrats. It was the first time you competed as part of the 50 squad team. Of course, they paired you against your brother, so you had even more motivation to climb as fast (and safe) as you could. They had been hyping up the “Street vs. Street'' showdown all week.

It was an easy win for you.

You were used to scaling out of your bedroom windows, up trees, over fences, so completing an actual course was a piece of cake in comparison. It also helps that you (fortunately/unfortunately) got your fathers height - which you hold over your big brother’s head at every opportunity.

“She’s got nothing on me when it comes to Move-and-shoots - you’ll see tomorrow (y/n). You’re going down.” Jim was pointing a finger at you and trying to goad you.

“I won’t go easy on you brother. You better bring your A-game.”

“I bring that everyday. Thank you very much.” He sassed back.

Luca POV

Watching the siblings interact was the best form of free entertainment Luca could ask for these days. It definitely helped that (y/n) was easy on the eyes. Looking over at her now, she was still in most of her gear. Slowly unlacing her boots while listening to her brother complain about his loss today.

There was no competition between those two, she completely dominated the course. Jim had mentioned that she always enjoyed climbing, even as a kid. But seeing her in action was incredible.

After Street made a smart ass comment about always being on his game - she smiled that killer smile and cocked her head to the side in faux confusion, “that was your A-game today?”

The whole room erupted in OOOHHHHHHHs as (y/n) once again, roasted Street for trying to come for her. Street wrapped an arm around her neck and gave her a nuggie playfully before she shoved him away, laughing at how red his face was.

It was impossible to not smile with her around. She made the days so much better. He loved having her hang out at the house with Street, Chris and himself. He was always trying to find an excuse for her to come over.

Even last weekend, just the two of them hung out and… and he thought he felt something between them. They had been making dinner together, listening to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers (her favorite band), when he had pulled her in to dance to Wildflowers. She smiled and swayed with him through the song, singing softly as they went. He wanted to ask her just then, “be my girl, be on my arm, I want to be with you.” but of course - that was the exact moment Jim and Chris came home from walking Duke.

Luca had fumed about it before coming up with a plan. Operation Sunshine. He would be straight forward, buy her flowers (her favorites) and ask her out on a date to the Getty - a place he knows she’s been wanting to visit since moving to LA. It was simple but thoughtful, something she would appreciate. The only problem was she was always with someone else. Her brother, 50 squad, the captain, he could barely get alone time with her! It was driving him nuts. But he had decided. Tonight was the night. 20 David was done for the day after their drills, while 50 David would be on until the night shift. (Y/n) had already been invited over for dinner. He would walk her out to her car that night and ask her. It was perfect. He was ready.

Around five that night, Chris was chopping veggies while Luca worked on browning the meat. After Chris moved in with them, the boys started learning how to cook actual dinners instead of relying on food trucks and takeout.

“So…” Chris began, giving Luca the side eye.

His eyebrows scrunched together, “so???”

“What do you think of Sunny?” He must have blushed because Chris broke out in a huge grin, “ha! Busted! I fricken knew it.” She started chopping veggies again like she didn’t just reveal his big secret.

“How - I… what?”

She snickered at him, “you’re not very good at hiding it. But don’t worry, she thinks you’re cute too.”

THAT through him for a loop. “Yea? You think she’d say yes if I asked her out?”

Chris rolled her eyes, “she’s been waiting for you to ask for like, a month. Luca, of course she’ll say yes.”

When Street came back inside the conversations shifted. They had been discussing the drills they were set to do tomorrow when Street’s phone started to ring.

“Hey man what’s up?”

Luca didn’t take any note of the conversation, focusing on what he was doing on the stove.

“She WHAT?”

That got Chris and Luca’s attention. Their heads both snapped to look over at Jim. Who was now at the entryway trying to tug on his shoes.

Chris rushed over to him, “what’s going on?” she whispered. Luca shut the stove off, watching his friend frantically looking for his keys.

“What hospital are they taking her to?” That sprung them into action, grabbing their coats and keys and following Street out the door. His head was racing - who? Who was going?

“Rocker, how is she? Is she ?”

Luca felt a pit in his stomach drop. Street was furiously wiping at his eyes as he listened to every word Rocker was saying to him. Chris shot a worried look over to Luca. No no no no no no. It’s not-

“We’ll be there - we’re coming.” Street hung up the phone looking at his two closest friends waiting to hear what was going on. “(Y/n) was stabbed while taking down a fucking suspect. They - they said she’s lost a lot of blood. She’s being airlifted to UCLA now.”

Chris grabbed the keys from Luca, who was standing there stunned, “I’m driving, let's move!”

Luca got into the backseat, tugging Street in with him. Street was in a daze, just staring down at the phone in his hands. Luca was not much better, but was trying to be there for his best friend.

“Street she’s tough - she’s just like you. She’ll pull through this.” Chris said, expertly weaving through LA traffic, trying to get to the university. It was never good if they had to airlift someone, the three of them knew that, and were avoiding talking about it.

By the time Rocker and the rest of 50 David got here, they had been told she was in surgery, but that it wasn’t looking good. She had lost a lot of blood.

Jim sucked in a pained breath, his eyes were red from holding back tears. “Luca - I just got her back. I can’t-”

Luca pulled Street into his arms, wiping at his own eyes. The whole way there he tried his best to reassure him that things will be fine, even as he was filled with dread. He looked up at Rocker, who was pacing the waiting room. He must have been thinking it was all his fault - she was a part of his team. “What happened?”

Rocker stopped to look at the three of them. “We had the guy cornered on the third floor of a parking structure. The guy had a hostage - knife to this girl's throat. Y/n came in from the floor above - so she was behind him and was able to distract him. It happened so fast - he toppled them over the side.” He sucked in a deep breath, scrubbing a hand down his face, “fucker had stabbed her - a- a few times. She wouldn’t drop him. Didn’t even tell us she’d be stabbed right away. I’m so sorry Street - I didn’t -”

Street shook his head, “Rocker - you didn’t do anything wrong. That’s just like Y/n - taking care of herself last. After you guys got the guy, the hostage was safe. She was like that when she was little too.”

The hospital waiting room soon filled with all of 50 David, 20 David, Captain Cortez, and Commander Hicks, as they waited to hear some news.

Commander Hick’s was pissed - at who wasn’t clear. “Where the hell is the doctor? It’s been almost three hours!”

The announcement of how much time had passed had sent Street on another spiral of blame. “I should’ve been there for her. I let her down. I didn’t fight for her when I should have.”

Luca was confused, rubbing at his back, “Jim what the hell are you talking about?”

He was shaking, Luca had never seen him like this, not even when his foster brother died. “When I turned 18 - I should’ve tried to get her out of her foster home, so maybe we could’ve lived together. Been a family again. I’ve lost so much time with her. I -”

He grasped Street’s shoulders so he was staring right at him, “Street listen to me. We’re going to get more time with her. She didn’t come back into your life to just leave again. She’s too stubborn for that. We gotta believe in her.”

Chris hugged Street tightly while Luca kept rubbing his back, trying to occupy his hands. Trying to focus on anything other than the what if’s that were plaguing his mind.

Six hours had passed by with no word from anyone

A surgeon came into the crowded waiting room looking a little shocked at the amount of police officers gathered, “(y/n) Street?”

Jim stood up, Chris and Luca holding one of his hands. He was shaking. “I’m her brother.”

The surgeon sighed, whipping at his hands. Oh god. No.

“We’ve managed to stabilize her for the time being. She lost almost 52% of her blood volume, most adults start to go into shock by the time they lose 40%.The medics had to revive her twice before I even got her on the operating table. It was touch and go for a while... She’s tough, I’ll give her that. The next 24 hours are going to be critical for her.”

Luca felt Jim’s legs buckle in momentary relief. She was alive. She was still fighting.

Y/n POV

There was a heaviness to your eyelids as you pried them open, an incessant beeping had woken you up. Tilting to the left you saw your brother curled up in a chair snoring loudly. He’s going to have a back ache tomorrow from sleeping like that. You tried to chuckle lightly then felt a tightness to your chest causing you to hiss out a pained breath.

In the corner of your eye you saw movement, and someone squeezing your hand. You looked over to see the guy you’ve been crushing on for months staring at you.

“How are you feeling?” He whispered. Blue eyes piercing yours and you knew better than to try and play off how shitty you felt.

“Sore - but I’m fine. We got the guy. Right?”

Luca nodded and smiled lightly but it didn’t reach his eyes. He looked down at the hand he was holding before looking back up at you. His eyes were welled with unshed tears, “you really scared us, Sunny.”

Luca’s voice, usually so light and firm when he spoke, was nothing more than a shaky whisper as he continued to talk, “I thought I lost you - and I didn’t even get to tell you how much you meant to me. I kept thinking about all the times I could have - those little moments we had where I should have just blurted out what I wanted to say.”

You could barely breathe while listening to him, you reached out to him with the hand he wasn’t holding and wiped away the tears that spilt over while he was talking. “Say it now. Please, Luca.”

He chuckled and grasped that hand lightly, “Y/n… This feeling I’ve had just keeps growing by the day. Everytime I’m with you, I don’t want it to end. And every time I’m not, I’m counting down the minutes until I can see you again. I’ve never had anything preoccupy my thoughts the way you do. So- so would you be my girl?”

You were holding back tears at hearing his confession. You’ve been waiting literally months for him to make a move. Too chicken to make the first step. He was your brother's best friend, and you didn’t want to be the one to make it awkward. But now, here he was, the man you’ve been waiting for - the answer was simple.

“Yes.”

Luca broke out into his signature smile and gingerly wrapped his arms around you, kissing the top of your head. “This is not how I originally planned on asking you - but I’m so glad you said yes.”

You smiled looking up at him, “you can do it again when I get discharged, however you’d like. I’ll still say yes.”

He smiled and let you rest your head back on the pillows, suddenly exhausted again. “Just rest now, y/n, we’ll talk more later.”

You nodded weakly, fighting to see your eyes open for just a moment more. “You’ll stay right?”

“I’m not going anywhere Y/n.”

#submission #reader x Dominique luca #dominique luca x reader #luca x reader #chris alonso #jim street #chris x street #stris #origional character #swat cbs #swat 2017 #swat luca #swat chris #swat street

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streakyglasses · 8 months

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salvation is coming in the morning

Chris's phone is almost dead, her keys are nowhere to be found, and all she can see is a sign that says Sunset Drive Inn. She considers her options before calling the one person who she knows, really, was the only option.

In the wake of Erika's death, Chris isn't doing well. Street helps.

S.W.A.T. (2017)

TW: anxiety attacks, mentions of drinking

Relationships: Chris Alonso & Jim Street

Other: hurt/comfort, post 4x08, tenderness, developing relationship

Read on ao3 here (registered users only)

or under the cut

The first thing Chris feels when she wakes up is the worsening pounding against her forehead. She groans against the pain, her hand reaching out to grasp her phone. Panic reels through her when she realizes not only can she not find it, but the sheets twisted around her aren’t her own.

Opening her eyes, she immediately has to blink back against the sunlight streaming through the broken slats in the blinds. The yellow-orange walls are in sharp contrast to the gray of her bedroom. She holds the scratchy covers over her chest as she raises up onto her elbow enough to gather that no one else is in the room with her.

Anymore, she thinks, trying to ignore the anxiety that fills her up.

Luckily, she’s jolted from her thoughts by the sight of her phone on the ground. Flipping it over, she exhales and lets her shoulders drop when there’s some battery left. Not a lot, but enough to give her the motivation to get up and collect her clothes. She considers a shower once she’s gotten them in a wrinkled pile in her arms on her way to the bathroom, but decides against it when she catches a glance of herself in the dirty mirror.

Dark circles stand out against the dullness of her skin, and the eyeliner that’s been applied over for days now is too smudged to be fixed. She doesn’t let her eyes travel further south than her collarbone, but even still red scratch marks are visible rounding over her shoulders. A vague memory of someone’s arms lifting her up as their beer-soaked lips met hers floats across her mind. The feeling of nails dragging against her skin as her back met the wall with a thud makes her wince, knowing that there has to be bruising from last night and the nights before that will soon make an appearance if it hasn’t already.

Just get out of here.

She pulls her clothes on as quickly as she can. When she finds her shoes, she’s thankful that she had enough forethought to opt for boots instead of heels, because trying to manage that at— whatever time it is— would only make matters worse. It takes another minute of hunting around before she finds her purse sticking out from under the bed, wallet and contents intact, but no keys. More panic starts to chip away at her and she reminds herself to take deep breaths as she tries to think back to the last place she was.

All she can remember is a dimly-lit room with exposed brick and lights, which could be any bar within a twenty-mile radius. A bright yellow sticky-note catches her eye, but all it contains is the scrawl of a stranger, without any hint as to where said stranger may have come from. Though, if they didn’t take her money, they probably didn’t take her pickup.

Braving a look through the blind confirms that her truck isn’t in the parking lot. A sinking feeling settles on her stomach now that she knows she’s effectively trapped. The small clock on the table reads 6 am, and she’s thankful for a moment that her job has conditioned her to wake up so early and that whoever she was with evidently functions the same way. Her phone is at a whopping 18% and she considers her options before calling the one person who she knows, really, was the only option.

“Hello?”

Her breath catches at the sound of Street’s voice, and her mouth opens but no sound escapes.

“Hello? Chris? Are you okay?”

She clears her throat and tries to keep her voice from thickening with tears when she speaks.

“Yeah,” she says, though it’s quiet and crackles with uncertainty.

“Yeah. I- yes. Promise you won’t judge me?” She starts again.

Her hand shakes and she bites her lip as she waits for his response. She thinks if she grips her phone any tighter, it will snap in half, but her grip loosens at his voice.

“I may mock, but I never judge. What’s up?” She can tell that concern is creeping into his voice, and it pains her to know that not only is this affecting the rest of her team, but that Street’s the one of them who won’t let it lie.

“I’m at a motel— the Sunset Drive Inn. Room 14. I don’t have my keys, and I’m not sure where my truck is. Can you give me a ride?”

There’s silence on the other end of the line. It only lasts a moment but it feels like it drags on for a lifetime as she waits for him to process. Her mouth opens to say something, anything else to fill the space, but before she can, he’s talking without an inch of doubt in his tone.

“I’ll be there in thirty.”

He doesn’t ask any more questions or demand any information, filled with an overwhelming need to see that she’s really okay. He brushes Luca off with a quick excuse before grabbing his keys and his bike helmet and hitting the road.

------------

Chris sits on the edge of the bed while she waits. She checks all of her banking apps until she has a short list of where her truck could be, and then lets her phone sit face-down next to her to save the battery. Her eyes travel the wallpaper, taking note of how it’s peeling away at the corners of the walls and warping the pattern. Bouncing her leg helps ease some of her anxiety, but it buzzes throughout her whole body as she tries not to tear herself apart for something that’s too late to change now.

For all the things she’s done in recent memory that are too late to change now.

The tightness in her chest grows and makes it harder for her to breathe. She clenches her jaw in response, trying in vain to remain in control against the guilt that threatens to swallow her. She digs her nails into her palms to keep the tears at bay until a knock at the door jars her back to the present.

“Chris? It’s me.” Street’s voice passes through the thin wooden door to her ears and it’s like, all of a sudden, she can breathe again, like the world has stopped crumbling beneath her feet. Any semblance of composure leaves her as she crosses to the door in a few short steps and rips it open.

Chris steps back to give Street room to enter and he bumps the door closed with his foot. Her instinct tells her to wrap her arms around him as tight as she can, but she stops herself. In his hand are two coffee cups, one of which he hands to her with a small, if scrutinizing, smile.

“Figured you might need it. Your usual, just not iced.”

She nods, too in shock to be able to say anything, and lets the burn of the coffee sit on her tongue for a second too long before swallowing.

“Thank you.” She whispers, leaving her gaze locked on the brown plastic lid even though she can feel Street’s eyes on her. In her periphery, she sees his hand come up, like he wants to rest it on her shoulder, but he freezes when she jerks away. It’s involuntary, he can tell, though it sends a pang of hurt through him all the same.

He racks his brain for anything he can do or say to try to make her feel better, but she cuts him off.

“I think I know where my truck is. A bar off 8th.”

She still won’t meet his eyes, so he just nods and says okay. He turns and holds the door open, watching her double check her pockets for all her belongings before she skirts past him.

“I’ll drive slow. Hang on.” He promises, though it holds none of the usual flirtatious undertones that make Chris roll her eyes and swat him on the shoulder. With nothing but another small nod, Chris climbs onto the back of the bike and wraps her arms around his torso.

------------

“Oh, thank God.” Chris murmurs under her breath when she sees her pickup sitting in a now-nearly-empty lot. Once Street’s bike is parked next to it, she leaves him to load it into the bed while she reenters the bar.

The smell of alcohol makes her nauseous, and the lighting brings more memories from the night flooding back to her. She shakes them off, searching over the heads of the few patrons until a tall, blond man smiles at her from behind the bar.

“Let me grab your keys!” He says, with too much energy for the hour. She nods and walks to the cash register to meet him.

“Alright,” he says, swirling the keys around his finger, “your tab was closed last night so you’re good to go. Be safe.”

“Thank you.” She says. She maneuvers her way through the tables back through the doors where Street is waiting at her driver’s side door. Unlocking the truck, she tosses the keys over to him without a word.

The radio hums low, and the cool window helps soothe her head on the drive back to her apartment.

------------

“Thank you.” She says as she slides out of the truck. The world swims for just a second so she braces herself on the door while she finds her footing. Once she’s sure she isn’t going to be sick, she steels herself and starts to walk towards her apartment, knowing Street will follow.

Her apartment feels cold when she walks through the doorway. She kicks off her boots and leaves them haphazard by the door. A glance at the clock tells her it’s just past 8, and a running timer until when her shift is supposed to start at 10 pops into her head.

Like he can read her thoughts, Street speaks before Chris can even turn around.

“You should call out. Take a day, get some rest.”

“I’m fine.” Chris snaps, the words out of her mouth sooner than she can even process what she’s saying. Street sighs, which only serves to aggravate her further as her walls slam back up and the bit of alcohol that’s still in her system sparks like a forest fire.

“You’re not.” Street says, his voice even and leaving no room for argument or bait to be taken. Chris tries anyway, the need to defend herself activating her fight or flight for the latter.

“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” She bites back. Her eyes narrow when she sees how Street bites the side of his cheek to keep from scoffing.

“I just had to pick you up because you drank too much and ended up in a seedy motel.”

It’s like a stab right through her stomach when he says it. Casually, like it’s the same kind of fact as saying the sky is blue, and she can’t help the tears that line her eyes even though her tone is as aggressive as ever.

“And what happened to not judging?”

Searching her eyes for something, anything he can hold onto, he softens when he sees the pain that’s behind her hardened gaze. He takes another step towards her.

“I’m not judging. I’m just worried, Chris, and you know if our roles were reversed, which they have been, you’d be telling me to take a day, too.”

Her only response is to look away as his words hit her and more tears start to swell.

“Call out. Take a shower and get some rest, okay? I’ll vouch for you.”

“Okay,” she starts, and then a different fear grips her.

“Luca? Was he, does—?”

“He was awake when you called, but he didn’t hear anything. I’m sure he’s also just concerned. I’ll tell them it’s a bug.”

She can see them asking questions and poking holes in his excuse now, but is too tired to try to come up with a better solution, so she nods.

“Okay. Thank you, Street.”

He smiles, dimples prominent even in the dim light, and takes another step towards her, opening his arms slightly. Waiting until she gives him the okay, he hugs her close to him and runs a hand down her back a few times before pulling back to arm's length.

“It’ll be okay, Chris. Go easy on yourself today, yeah?”

“Yeah,” she promises softly. She watches him go, turning back to give her one last glance before softly shutting her door, and then she sighs. Like the rest of her energy has been drained from her, she slumps against the wall and then slides down until she’s sitting on the ground.

She doesn’t know how long she sits on the ground, nor does she remember opening her phone to text Hondo that she’d be out. Once she’s able to bring herself to stand, she plugs the device in and pours a shot of the vodka in the freezer, downing it without a second thought.

Just to take the edge off, she tells herself.

The mirror has fogged with shower steam before she moves to strip and step into the stream. Doing everything in her power to avoid looking at herself, knowing she’ll only look more unrecognizable since the motel bathroom only a few hours ago, she washes off the remnants of the prior night with the hottest water she can stand.

Whatever relief the hot water provided for the agony reverberating in her skull fades away as soon as she turns it off. Sighing, Chris grabs the first thing she gets her hands on out of her drawer, and buries herself in bed.

------------

It’s nearly 8pm when Chris wakes up for longer than a few minutes, but the paralyzing despair she’s felt every time she’s opened her eyes is still present. She knows she has a stream of texts waiting for her, able to hear the ding of her phone, though the thought of venturing down the hallway feels like a lead weight on her chest keeping her stuck in bed.

Erika’s belongings are gone, have long since been packed by Chris on a day she tries not to remember and picked up by Erika’s sister, but the memory of Erika, of what was supposed to be, permeates every common space. The couch has been delivered, but Chris hasn’t been able to sit on or pull up the painter’s tape outline on the floor of where it was to be set. Even the few photos of the pair that belonged to Chris seem to stare into her whenever she leaves her room, filling her with guilt that she has the audacity to continue to live in a space that she feels directly responsible for ruining.

It eats away at her, morphing into a panic that’s so loud it’s the only thing she can focus on.

Her heart beats against her chest like rising water against a dam, and she can’t keep her eyes open long enough to dispel the images that cross her mind when she closes them. Her hands twist in the sheets, gripping at them with white knuckles as she tries to draw in a full breath. The realization that she can’t only serves to make her more panicked, until she shoots out of bed and runs to the island for her phone— memories be damned.

She’s just finished punching in his number when reality hits her.

Calling him now will only make the team more worried.

She sighs, but is grateful for the single moment of sanity that has her opening her texts instead. His name sits near the top.

‘Will you come over after shift?’

She hardly waits five minutes for a response.

‘As soon as I get off.’

She exhales. The microwave clock tells her half an hour has passed, meaning she realistically has another two before he knocks on her door. Throwing on sneakers, Chris grabs her keys from the countertop and lets the door slam shut behind her.

------------

“Chris?”

A knock at the door startles her, same as the morning, and she takes a sip of her water as she pulls herself off the couch to answer.

“Hey.” She says as she opens the door, sticking her hands in her pockets to hide their slight shake.

“Hey.” He gives her a small smile and finds his keys a place on the hook. “So, what did you—- Oh!”

He’s cut off by her arms wrapping around his torso. On instinct, his body returns the gesture, one hand gently cradling the back of her head.

His surprise quickly turns to concern when he feels how her shoulders are shaking underneath him, paired with soft sniffles. When he tries to take a step backward, he’s met with her grip tightening and a shake of her head.

“Don’t, please,” she pleads, voice ragged. It’s enough to make his heart break and he shushes her.

“Okay, it’s okay.” He soothes her. She pushes even closer to him. His leather jacket is cool under her hands as her fingers claw at the steadiness of his shoulders. Her sobs heighten past the point of being able to understand his comforting words, and steal her ability to breathe. The more she tries, the worse her whimpering becomes.

“Chris?” Street whispers, hearing the catch in her breathing. She shakes her head, her fingers digging into him even harder, and he swallows down his own panic.

“C’mon, let’s sit down, okay?”

Unable to speak, Chris nods, though her body won’t listen to commands to walk any more than it will a command to breathe. She’s afraid that if she lets him go, she’ll collapse. Feeling her freeze up, Street keeps his arms around her as he maneuvers them both to the couch. He takes her weight easily as she falls next to him, buries her face in his neck, and curls her knees up to her chest.

Street feels her tears hot on his skin once they’re sitting, and it’s all he can do to keep running his hands up and down her arm and back and remind her to try to breathe. She pulls away from him the more stunted it becomes, her face in her hands. With one look at her shaking body, Street moves from sitting next to her to kneeling in front of her, his body wedged in between the couch and coffee table and his hands wrapped around her forearms.

“Chris, you’ve got to breathe for me.” He pleads, his pitch rising in panic. He watches as her hands clench and open as she grasps for control of herself.

“You’re safe, just breathe.”

Her body jerks. His words sound like they’re traveling through water before they reach her so she can only make out pieces against the blood rushing through her ears. She tries to look up, to catch a glimpse of his face, but her vision is blurred and his eyes swim before her.

“I can’t,” she finally chokes out. It’s hard to make out around the lump in her throat and her hyperventilating, but Street nods along to let her know he heard her.

“Street, I can’t.”

She knows she sounds scared, because she is. Her chest is heaving, stars creeping into the corner of her eyes, and he sees her face go pale. With more urgency, Street pulls her arms away from her face to cradle it in his hands instead.

Steadying his voice, he holds her still and looks into her eyes.

“Yes you can. You’re safe, Chris, I promise.”

She shakes her head, hands again coming up like she’s going to shove him away, but he manages to catch her hand in one of his own before she can. Her grip is so tight he knows it’ll leave marks behind, but he doesn’t care. A glance at the clock tells him it’s been almost ten minutes since he arrived, and he wonders if she’s sat with this all day by herself.

“It’s almost over, Chris. Breathe.”

High-pitched whimpers continue to escape as her body’s nervous system continues to catapult and plummet like a rollercoaster. He wipes away her tears with his thumb as they fall, and then caresses her cheekbone over-and-over.

After another few minutes of his gentle ministrations, the wall in her chest breaks, and the tears start to slow as her lungs fill with air.

The world comes back into focus slowly. Her breathing is choppy, eyes squeezed shut out of fear, and Street’s touch on her is a lifeline. When she does open her eyes, he’s the first thing she sees. His face is also red, the remnants of tears long since quieted on his lashes, and her eyes flick down to see his hand in hers, the weight comforting on her lap. No one speaks as her body returns to itself, exhaustion and relief hitting her in equal parts.

“Thank you,” she whispers a minute later, voice croaking. A soft smile comes to his face and warms her as much as his hand moving back to her cheek as her eyes flit around, uncertain.

“No thanks necessary. Let me get you some water, okay?”

He waits for her nod to disentangle himself from his position on the floor. Rooting around her cabinets, he pulls out a glass for water and a small bottle of painkillers. Last, he grabs the box of tissues on the end table and sets them next to her on the couch.

She holds the water in her mouth, letting the cool sensation touch every one of her nerves before swallowing, and when she does, she exhales as if to tell him again that she’s okay.

He watches as she blows her nose and then dips another tissue into the water to wipe her face. Afterward, she takes another drink and then sighs.

“How do you feel?” Street asks, bringing her attention back to him.

Chris shrugs, but takes the time to take stock of her entire body. Her neck aches, her whole body aches, and each individual thread of her sweatshirt seems to rub her arms. Finally, she settles on,

“Tired. But better.”

He knows she doesn’t just mean in the physical sense, and nods.

“I’m glad you feel better, I know everything has been a lot recently, for all of us.”

She side eyes him like she wants to make a comment about how she’s the only one who just had an anxiety attack on the couch and can barely drag herself into work every morning, but she refrains. His hand on her arm is electric even through the fabric.

“I’m not kidding, Chris. This is the hardest thing that’s happened to me since Nate. Everyone is grieving, you’re not alone.”

He sighs when she shrugs again, trying to think of anything he can say to get through to her.

“I used to have anxiety attacks too. A lot, actually, as a kid and all through the academy. Then with my mom, and after Nate. I told you earlier, no judgement. I mean that.”

The gentle authenticity of his voice is almost too much. She curses the tears that are in her eyes again, and the way her voice cracks when she speaks.

“I just feel like I failed her all the time.”

Street is quick to pull her back into his side, an arm around her and running up and down her shoulder with his cheek resting on the top of her head. Her cries are less intense, made up more of whimpers than anything, and she’s able to stop them much quicker.

“I’m so sorry, Chris. I promise you, you didn’t. And I know it may not mean much now, but no one blames you. Erika certainly wouldn’t.”

Her head shakes, her hair tickling his cheek, like she wants to argue.

“I was the reason—”

“Yeah. You brought Erika on to fill in, but you had no idea what was going to happen walking into that place. None of us did, and we all agreed to the risk. You didn’t give anyone those guns or do anything other than try to get Tan out safely. Erika’s death is a tragedy, but the only person who’s at fault is the man who shot her.”

Somewhere throughout his monologue, Chris maneuvered herself out from under his arm to look at him. His hazel eyes are as sure as they’ve ever been, full of sadness but also life.

“Can you please try to believe me?”

His question cuts straight through to her heart.

“It isn’t that easy.”

“I know, trust me. But it gets easier, especially once you’re able to set aside the self-blame.”

“Negative rumination.” She mutters under her breath, all-too familiar with the term thanks to Wendy. He nods in understanding and takes her hand to squeeze it.

“It’s not easy. But you’ve got to let go of a little bit of this weight before it tears you apart. The team can’t lose you. I can’t either.”

She’s shaking, she knows, and understands that everything is far from fixed or normal and she’s far from feeling okay, but a long-forgotten calmness seems to settle on her. It’s like, after weeks, the edge has finally been taken off.

“Will you stay tonight?”

“Chris—”

“Not for— it doesn’t have to be the bedroom. I don’t care where. We can sleep on the couch and chair. I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep since I moved in. I can barely stand to be in here half the time.”

It all clicks at once. The hotels and the blacking out and the avoidance. He’s able to leave it at HQ, but the reality of what happened follows Chris home every day. He’s reminded of a series of stripped motorcycles and his own late night phone calls to her.

“Of course, I’ll stay.”

She gives him a small, sad smile and squeezes his hand before standing. She picks up the tissues to toss them on her way to the bathroom, and he exhales when he hears the door close.

New weight has settled on his chest, the want to help her and to keep the extent of this situation from the team, but so has new understanding.

While the water runs, he takes the liberty of cleaning up the rest of the table and tidying her kitchen so he feels useful. Looking down the hallway, her bedroom door is open and his gaze switches between the dim light on her headboard and the couch. Street takes stock of himself, his own emotions, and when the decision firmly lands in his gut, he follows it, and waits for her to open the bathroom door.

“I just need to brush my teeth, and I don’t have pajamas, but…”

He isn’t sure how to say it, to voice his comfort with sharing a bed with her in a way that feels significantly more intimate than any sex he’s had. That, despite the issues within their own relationship, all of that feels secondary to just being together as people, as friends, helping one another feel safe and loved. Instead, she follows his gaze over her shoulder into her bedroom.

“Okay.” She says softly.

------------

“Hey,” he says as to not startle her when he enters the room.

“Hey.”

She’s already under the covers, sweats traded for pajama shorts but the hoodie still in place. Her back is turned towards him as he undresses himself down to boxers and a white tee-shirt, and then flicks off the light and carefully slides into the bed so they’re facing one another.

A mix of insecurity and uncertainty hits Street, broken by Chris’s voice.

“Thank you again. I’m going to talk to Wendy tomorrow.”

He smiles at her and lets his hand come up to brush the hair that’s fallen across her face and rest on her neck.

“Good. I’ve seen her a lot lately.”

“The team didn’t ask any questions?”

“Just if you were okay. I told them you weren’t feeling great, but you’d be okay. Nothing more than that.”

She looks like she wants to say something else, to thank him again or ask another question, but exhaustion is like an extra blanket on her and all she manages is a yawn.

“Let’s get some sleep. Nate always used to say that ‘salvation is coming in the morning.’ I don’t know where he picked it up, but it was profound for a 12-year-old, and I remind myself of it even more often nowadays. I’ve found it’s usually true.” He promises, kissing her forehead and adjusting as she turns and presses her back against his chest. His hand is held tightly between hers, up to her chest. A few moments later, he spares a quick glance at the clock to see that it isn’t as late as he thought. When he feels the rest of her weight drop into the mattress and her breathing deepen, he closes his own eyes and waits for sleep.

------------

Chris wakes up first, right as the sun is starting to rise, though she can’t tell with her curtains. Her body, mind, and soul are heavy, but lighter than before. A million questions float through her mind, a jumble of ones full of anxiety and guilt mixed with wondering about when she’ll see her family next. Taking a deep breath, she steadies her heartbeat and quiets the flood.

Focusing on nothing more than her own pulse, Street’s hand next to her chest where it was last night, and his breath even on her neck, she thinks that he’s right.

Salvation is coming in the morning.

#swat cbs #swat #SWAT 2017 #chris alonso #jim street #stris #chris x street #street x chris

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thecallthatchangemydestiny · 8 months

Text

DOMINIC LUCA ONE-SHOT

-I don’t think this is a good idea- said Jessica Cortez to her friend

-it’s our only chance- said Maya - plus… I like dancing- Jessica sighted, indeed it was the only way to take down the Russian gang down. The plan was simple, Maya going to the strip club, making the boss ask for a private dance and making him talk.

-Okay, you’re going tomorrow-

-everything is going to be fine- said Maya with a big smile-well I’m going to set everything, see you tomorrow- Maya leave the place while Jessica called her SWAT team.

-Hondo, Luca you’re staying with her as the “bodyguards” if she says bring me the wine is the safe word to attack.-Luca an Hondo hesitated, Maya has never been in action before so they feel nervous about this whole operation. -Deac, Tan, Chris and Street are going to stay outside waiting for your signal to enter Hondo.-

-Okay, let’s get ready- said Hondo watching Luca, and everybody left the room.

•The next day•

-I’m ready- said Maya entering the room with a beautiful (and short) gold dress, her beautiful long hair was loose and her makeup was just sparkling… all of her looked like gold. All the eyes where on her but she didn’t even notice, all her focus was on the operation.

-Okay remember Maya- said Hondo in his bodyguard disguise -you’re Ramona, the star of the strip club and you hire Rooster and Gene as your bodyguards- Maya said yes with your head, she notice how Luca was silent looking at her, he seemed nervous but she couldn’t get why, he was always excited and ready for a mission.

-Yes Gene, don’t worry- Maya winked her eye at both of them- let’s get going, my show is about to start!-

-I’ll be fine- said maya behind the stage with her mic on so Luca and Hondo could hear-I got you guys taking care of me, nothing could go wrong.- with that said Luca smiled.

-And now the star of our show…- began to said the owner of the club

-Okay he’s in the first row- began to said Luca to the mic -white as a ghost, red suit and the ugliest face I’ve ever seen- Maya laughed, she feel relived now that Luca was more calm.

-RAMONA- and with that said, Maya enter the stage dancing, she could feel the lust eyes of Sergej, the Russian, all over her body.

-Hey Luca, when I said eyes on her all the time I don’t meant like THAT- Hondo laughed while looking at Luca, who couldn’t care less about what Hondo was saying, he was only looking at her. But the ones out the strip waiting for Hondo signal where laughing imagining the scene.

-Excuse me, are you Ramona’s bodyguard?- said a guy approaching Luca, who returned to his reality

-Yes, me and my friend Gene over there- said Luca in a serious tone pointing at Hondo who was across the room.

-Good, my boss would like a private time with her- Luca had mixed feelings, happy because everything was going as planned but angry and nervous of that man being too close to Maya.

-Absolutely, do you have the money to pay her private time?

-Of course with do- said that man with a funny tone, making fun of that question.

-Come with us- said Luca and he took the man and Sergej to the room where Maya was.

-You’re absolutely beautiful- said Sergej with a really strong Russian accent and an evil smile -and you’re dance was spectacular!- Maya give a fake smile, but yet, a nice one so Sergej didn’t even notice it wasn’t sincere.

-thank you sir.- Maya begin to say with a flirty tone of voice -you’re too kind.- the Russian bodyguard was near Luca and Hondo who were in front of the door watching the whole interaction, but Luca was more focus on her.

-I want you to be my partner, my girlfriend- said the Russian man to her, she was surprised, she wasn’t expecting that preposition - You’re beautiful and I’m going to give you everything you want, you can leave thin place forever.- Luca and Hondo looked at Maya, who was analyzing what to say

-do you know how many man have told me that they’re going to take me out of here?- said Maya getting closer to Sergej -How can I know you’re telling the truth?-

-Tell your bodyguards to leave- said the Russian pointing Hondo and Luca -and I’ll tell you- Luca was worried, and very angry ¿why he wanted them to leave? ¿What if he does something to her?

-Fine- said Maya looking at Luca -but tell also your man to leave- and with that said, Sergej said something in Russian and his man got out the room. -Rooster, Gene- continue Maya -please also leave- Hondo leave but Luca stay a little bit longer, looking at her, promising to himself to always take care of her. And just then, he left the room.-

A few minutes had passed but from outside the room nothing could be heard.

-stop going around so many times, you’re going to make me dizzy- said Hondo looking how Luca was nervously going around

-Sorry man, I’m just nervous- said Luca standing in front of him -I don’t like the silence-

-I know, but everything is going fine, so don’t worry- Luca smiled a little bit

-Rooster, Gene- shouted Maya -Can you bring the wine, please?- Luca and Hondo looked at each other, that was the sign.

-Bring the wine to the star- said Hondo to the mic, for Deac and the other squad to hear. -Let’s go- and with that said, Hondo run to room and shouted -LAPD EVERYBODY TO THE GROUND- the Russian man take out the gun and began to shoot Luca and Hondo, while Sergej punched Maya and took her pointing a gun to her head. Hondo took down the Russian, and Luca looked at Maya.

-Let her go- said Luca furious pointing with his gun at Sergej -NOW- Maya stomped her foot hard with her heel, making the other man shout with pain while Luca shoot him in the shoulder and taking Maya into his arms.

-Hey Rooster- said Maya getting closer to Luca, she was in the doctor the whole night because of the injuries Sergej left to Maya after the hit he gave her, Luca stayed at the hospital waiting for her.

-Hey! Maya- Luca hugged her, he was worried about her -how are you feeling?-

-better, we got him, that’s all that matters- and she have him a huge and beautiful smile.

-I was worried about you.-

-I know-

-how do you know that?- said Luca funny

-You’ve got your mic on this whole time- and then his smile disappeared, she could hear how he admitted to Chris and Street his mad crush on her, how Hondo make fun of him and how obvious he was… his whole face got red while Maya laughed with tenderness.

-Maya… I’m so sorry, I didn’t…- and than she interrupted him with a kiss.-

-I had a big mad crush on you too-

#swat 2017 #swat cbs #dominique luca #Dominic Luca #jim street #hondo harrelson #chris alonso #victor tan #one shot #kenny johnson #swat imagines #swat team

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