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#stop with the romances start with the killing of terrible men
longclawshilt · 7 hours
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Prince Rhaegar as a character often gets some deserved criticism - and a lot of underserved hate. And one of the things that I think he unfairly gets blamed for is Elia Martell's tragedy. Elia's death is one of the primary objections people have towards Rhaegar and Lyanna being depicted as a romance, with readers believing that if they were just tragic lovers, then that diminishes Elia's own tragedy.
I...disagree. It is understandable (and honestly right) that readers would rally behind Elia. Not only was she horribly brutalized and murdered, but her children suffered absolutely terrible fates as well.
However, in trying to center Rhaegar and Lyanna's doomed dalliance in this, a lot of readers are missing the answer that has been already provided to us within the narrative. Not only that, but this line of thinking also ignores the key context in which Elia's senseless murder is portrayed.
As far as the text goes, Elia’s death is laid squarely at the feet of Tywin Lannister and his men, Ser Gregor Clegane and Ser Amory Lorch. It's House Lannister's burden to bear.
Doran for one, Elia's brother, directly blames Tywin Lannister:
“You mistake patience for forbearance. I have worked at the downfall of Tywin Lannister since the day they told me of Elia and her children.”
The Princess in the Tower, AFFC
Even Oberyn agrees:
“Dwarf,” said the Red Viper, in a tone grown markedly less cordial, “spare me your Lannister lies. Is it sheep you take us for, or fools? My brother is not a bloodthirsty man, but neither has he been asleep for sixteen years. Jon Arryn came to Sunspear the year after Robert took the throne, and you can be sure that he was questioned closely. Him, and a hundred more. I did not come for some mummer’s show of an inquiry. I came for justice for Elia and her children, and I will have it. Starting with this lummox Gregor Clegane … but not, I think, ending there. Before he dies, the Enormity That Rides will tell me whence came his orders, please assure your lord father of that.” He smiled. “An old septon once claimed I was living proof of the goodness of the gods. Do you know why that is, Imp?”
Tyrion IV, ASOS
“Is that the game we are playing?” Tyrion rubbed at his scarred nose. He had nothing to lose by telling Oberyn the truth. “There was a bear at Harrenhal, and it did kill Ser Amory Lorch.” “How sad for him,” said the Red Viper. “And for you. Do all noseless men lie so badly, I wonder?” “I am not lying. Ser Amory dragged Princess Rhaenys out from under her father’s bed and stabbed her to death. He had some men-at-arms with him, but I do not know their names.” He leaned forward. “It was Ser Gregor Clegane who smashed Prince Aegon’s head against a wall and raped your sister Elia with his blood and brains still on his hands.” “What is this, now? Truth, from a Lannister?” Oberyn smiled coldly. “Your father gave the commands, yes?” “No.” He spoke the lie without hesitation, and never stopped to ask himself why he should. The Dornishman raised one thin black eyebrow. “Such a dutiful son. And such a very feeble lie. It was Lord Tywin who presented my sister’s children to King Robert all wrapped up in crimson Lannister cloaks.”
Tyrion IX, ASOS
“Elia Martell, Princess of Dorne,” the Red Viper hissed. “You raped her. You murdered her. You killed her children…“I came to hear you confess.”
Tyrion X, ASOS
Varys and Tyrion both understand that House Martell (but more specifically Doran) hates the Lannisters.
“The Dornishmen thus far have held aloof from these wars. Doran Martell has called his banners, but no more. His hatred for House Lannister is well known, and it is commonly thought he will join Lord Renly. You wish to dissuade him.” “All this is obvious,” said Tyrion. “The only puzzle is what you might have offered for his allegiance. The prince is a sentimental man, and he still mourns his sister Elia and her sweet babe.” “My father once told me that a lord never lets sentiment get in the way of ambition … and it happens we have an empty seat on the small council, now that Lord Janos has taken the black.” “A council seat is not to be despised,” Varys admitted, “yet will it be enough to make a proud man forget his sister’s murder?” “Why forget?” Tyrion smiled. “I’ve promised to deliver his sister’s killers, alive or dead, as he prefers. After the war is done, to be sure.” Varys gave him a shrewd look. “My little birds tell me that Princess Elia cried a … certain name … when they came for her.” “Is a secret still a secret if everyone knows it?” In Casterly Rock, it was common knowledge that Gregor Clegane had killed Elia and her babe. They said he had raped the princess with her son’s blood and brains still on his hands. “This secret is your lord father’s sworn man.” “My father would be the first to tell you that fifty thousand Dornishmen are worth one rabid dog.” Varys stroked a powdered cheek. “And if Prince Doran demands the blood of the lord who gave the command as well as the knight who did the deed …” “Robert Baratheon led the rebellion. All commands came from him, in the end.” “Robert was not at King’s Landing.” “Neither was Doran Martell.”
Tyrion IV, ACOK
Really, all the nobles know where to look at when assigning blame for Elia's murder. Tywin.
“Prince Doran comes at my son’s invitation,” Lord Tywin said calmly, “not only to join in our celebration, but to claim his seat on this council, and the justice Robert denied him for the murder of his sister Elia and her children.” Tyrion watched the faces of the Lords Tyrell, Redwyne, and Rowan, wondering if any of the three would be bold enough to say, “But Lord Tywin, wasn’t it you who presented the bodies to Robert, all wrapped up in Lannister cloaks?” None of them did, but it was there on their faces all the same. Redwyne does not give a fig, he thought, but Rowan looks fit to gag.
Tywin, for the most part, quite shamelessly tries to disassociate himself from his own moral failings; this is nothing new, because he follows this same MO with squarely blaming the Freys for the Red Wedding even though he played an integral part in planning for it.
“Then why did the Mountain kill her?” “Because I did not tell him to spare her. I doubt I mentioned her at all. I had more pressing concerns. Ned Stark’s van was rushing south from the Trident, and I feared it might come to swords between us. And it was in Aerys to murder Jaime, with no more cause than spite. That was the thing I feared most. That, and what Jaime himself might do.” He closed a fist. “Nor did I yet grasp what I had in Gregor Clegane, only that he was huge and terrible in battle. The rape … even you will not accuse me of giving that command, I would hope. Ser Amory was almost as bestial with Rhaenys. I asked him afterward why it had required half a hundred thrusts to kill a girl of … two? Three? He said she’d kicked him and would not stop screaming. If Lorch had half the wits the gods gave a turnip, he would have calmed her with a few sweet words and used a soft silk pillow.” His mouth twisted in distaste. “The blood was in him.”
Tyrion VI, ASOS
“And when Oberyn demands the justice he’s come for?” “I will tell him that Ser Amory Lorch killed Elia and her children,” Lord Tywin said calmly. “So will you, if he asks.” “Ser Amory Lorch is dead,” Tyrion said flatly. “Precisely. Vargo Hoat had Ser Amory torn apart by a bear after the fall of Harrenhal. That ought to be sufficiently grisly to appease even Oberyn Martell.” “You may call that justice …” “It is justice. It was Ser Amory who brought me the girl’s body, if you must know. He found her hiding under her father’s bed, as if she believed Rhaegar could still protect her. Princess Elia and the babe were in the nursery a floor below.”
Tyrion VI, ASOS
Tywin tries to alleviate himself of any responsibility by blaming his men, but the narrative actively calls bullshit on this (through Tywin's own son no less).
So the narrative shows through multiple POVs that Elia's murder is contextualized exclusively as a failing on Tywin Lannister and his men; not only was it a moral failing, but Tyrion also questions if it was politically necessary in the first place. It's also important to note that ASOS is when we really dive into the matter of Elia and her children (mostly through Oberyn), but we also have to remember that this is the same book as the Red Wedding. The Red Wedding, another one of Tywin's senseless massacres that he tries to postulate as politically necessary.
So, we have agreed that the blame and context for Elia's (and her children's) murder is presented through the lens of Tywin as an immoral politician who often makes politically unnecessary moves. But then we ask ourselves, can the responsibility of this tragedy be extended? Well, yes it can. And it has been in the text.
Ser Barristan extends this tragedy beyond Tywin and his men
...to King Robert.
“Prince Rhaegar had two children,” Ser Barristan told him. “Rhaenys was a little girl, Aegon a babe in arms. When Tywin Lannister took King’s Landing, his men killed both of them. He served the bloody bodies up in crimson cloaks, a gift for the new king.” And what did Robert say when he saw them? Did he smile? Barristan Selmy had been badly wounded on the Trident, so he had been spared the sight of Lord Tywin’s gift, but oft he wondered. If I had seen him smile over the red ruins of Rhaegar’s children, no army on this earth could have stopped me from killing him. “I will not suffer the murder of children. Accept that, or I’ll have no part of this.”
The Kingbreaker, ADWD
Ned Stark does as well.
Ned did not feign surprise; Robert’s hatred of the Targaryens was a madness in him. He remembered the angry words they had exchanged when Tywin Lannister had presented Robert with the corpses of Rhaegar’s wife and children as a token of fealty. Ned had named that murder; Robert called it war. When he had protested that the young prince and princess were no more than babes, his new-made king had replied, “I see no babes. Only dragonspawn.” Not even Jon Arryn had been able to calm that storm. Eddard Stark had ridden out that very day in a cold rage, to fight the last battles of the war alone in the south. It had taken another death to reconcile them; Lyanna’s death, and the grief they had shared over her passing.
Eddard II, AGOT
And so does Tywin, who uses Robert's tacit approval as justification for this senseless act.
Lord Tywin stared at him as if he had lost his wits. “You deserve that motley, then. We had come late to Robert’s cause. It was necessary to demonstrate our loyalty. When I laid those bodies before the throne, no man could doubt that we had forsaken House Targaryen forever. And Robert’s relief was palpable. As stupid as he was, even he knew that Rhaegar’s children had to die if his throne was ever to be secure. Yet he saw himself as a hero, and heroes do not kill children.” His father shrugged. “I grant you, it was done too brutally. Elia need not have been harmed at all, that was sheer folly. By herself she was nothing.”
Tyrion VI, ASOS
So if we can't extend the blame to Rhaegar, because the narrative doesn't do so either, what can we hold him responsible for? Let's take a step back and look at Rhaegar's culpability in this whole thing.
Was Rhaegar (and Lyanna) responsible for starting the war that would eventually lead to Elia's murder?
No. GRRM doesn't think so. The war actually started when King Aerys murdered the Lord of Winterfell and his heir, a bunch of other northern nobles, and then called for the heads of Robert Baratheon (Lord of Storm's End) and Ned Stark (the new Lord of Winterfell). Aerys broke the feudal contract, and so Jon Arryn declared war.
I don't think I would have stayed loyal to the Mad King. Do I think they were justified? Yes, and no. [...] There was no doubt that the Mad King was mad. He was paranoid and he was abusing his power. And Westeros has no Magna Carta or anything like that. There was no way to handle this within the rule of law. But was what they do justified? Especially when you consider that it was triggered by a personal grievance. The execution of Ned's father and brother was really a thing that radicalized Ned and put him in opposition to it. Robert was just rolling for a fight and didn't like the fact that he'd lost his girlfriend. So you know, the personal informs the political.
source
Rhaegar and Lyanna's disappearance was merely the spark - it led to a misunderstanding that caused Brandon Stark to ride to Kingslanding. What really caused the war was Aerys' Targaryens subsequent actions as the king. So if we want to blame someone for causing the chain of events that led to Elia's death as well as her children's, the author himself says to blame Aerys; even though I don't think this is right either because we once again stray from the necessary (and sole) context of Elia's murder - Tywin's bloody hands.
Fine. Rhaegar was not responsible for the war. But surely he is responsible for leaving Elia in King's Landing, right in the clutches of Mad King Aerys. Well, this again, is not true. As far as Rhaegar knew, Elia was in Dragonstone with Aegon and Rhaenys where he left them.
As cold winds hammered the city, King Aerys II turned to his pyromancers, charging them to drive the winter off with their magics. Huge green fires burned along the walls of the Red Keep for a moon’s turn. Prince Rhaegar was not in the city to observe them, however. Nor could he be found in Dragonstone with Princess Elia and their young son, Aegon.
“The Year of the False Spring”, The World of Ice and Fire
At some point, Elia was called to King's Landing. And it was Aerys who kept her hostage there as insurance against possible Dornish betrayal (remember, he was paranoid).
Side Note: Aerys kept another important political hostage in King's Landing along with Elia - Jaime Lannister; this is to deter anyone from trying to blame Jaime for doing nothing. He was a teenager and a hostage himself!
“My Sworn Brothers were all away, you see, but Aerys liked to keep me close. I was my father’s son, so he did not trust me. He wanted me where Varys could watch me, day and night. So I heard it all.” He remembered how Rossart’s eyes would shine when he unrolled his maps to show where the substance must be placed. Garigus and Belis were the same. “Rhaegar met Robert on the Trident, and you know what happened there. When the word reached court, Aerys packed the queen off to Dragonstone with Prince Viserys. Princess Elia would have gone as well, but he forbade it. Somehow he had gotten it in his head that Prince Lewyn must have betrayed Rhaegar on the Trident, but he thought he could keep Dorne loyal so long as he kept Elia and Aegon by his side. The traitors want my city, I heard him tell Rossart, but I’ll give them naught but ashes. Let Robert be king over charred bones and cooked meat. The Targaryens never bury their dead, they burn them. Aerys meant to have the greatest funeral pyre of them all. Though if truth be told, I do not believe he truly expected to die. Like Aerion Brightfire before him, Aerys thought the fire would transform him … that he would rise again, reborn as a dragon, and turn all his enemies to ash.
Jaime V, ASOS
Ok, fine. So Rhaegar did not abandon her with Aerys then run off to Lyanna. But he should have done something when he came back, right? Why didn't he leave more Kings Guard with Elia and the children?
Well....this is a war. The knights of the KG are important assets on the battle field. Kings Landing, at the time, was not the most dangerous location. The KG were better off at the Trident, as a victory there would protect those who were left behind in KL.
And it's not that Rhaegar didn't do anything. Beyond going off to lead the battle himself, he tried to make moves that would help those who were back in KL (Elia and the children included).
He floated in heat, in memory. “After dancing griffins lost the Battle of the Bells, Aerys exiled him.” Why am I telling this absurd ugly child? “He had finally realized that Robert was no mere outlaw lord to be crushed at whim, but the greatest threat House Targaryen had faced since Daemon Blackfyre. The king reminded Lewyn Martell gracelessly that he held Elia and sent him to take command of the ten thousand Dornishmen coming up the kingsroad. Jon Darry and Barristan Selmy rode to Stoney Sept to rally what they could of griffins’ men, and Prince Rhaegar returned from the south and persuaded his father to swallow his pride and summon my father. But no raven returned from Casterly Rock, and that made the king even more afraid. He saw traitors everywhere, and Varys was always there to point out any he might have missed. So His Grace commanded his alchemists to place caches of wildfire all over King’s Landing. Beneath Baelor’s Sept and the hovels of Flea Bottom, under stables and storehouses, at all seven gates, even in the cellars of the Red Keep itself.
Jaime V ASOS
And Jaime's POV once again shows us that Rhaegar banked on victory at the Trident, and was fully expecting to come back to KL and amend the fraught political situation.
The day had been windy when he said farewell to Rhaegar, in the yard of the Red Keep. The prince had donned his night-black armor, with the three-headed dragon picked out in rubies on his breastplate. “Your Grace,” Jaime had pleaded, “let Darry stay to guard the king this once, or Ser Barristan. Their cloaks are as white as mine.” Prince Rhaegar shook his head. “My royal sire fears your father more than he does our cousin Robert. He wants you close, so Lord Tywin cannot harm him. I dare not take that crutch away from him at such an hour.” Jaime’s anger had risen up in his throat. “I am not a crutch. I am a knight of the Kingsguard.” “Then guard the king,” Ser Jon Darry snapped at him. “When you donned that cloak, you promised to obey.” Rhaegar had put his hand on Jaime’s shoulder. “When this battle’s done I mean to call a council. Changes will be made. I meant to do it long ago, but … well, it does no good to speak of roads not taken. We shall talk when I return.”
Jaime I, AFFC
So Rhaegar wasn't leaving with no care about what happened back in King's Landing. We don't know what he wanted to do with Aerys, Elia, Lyanna, and the aftermath of the war because he died at the Trident. But we do know that he, at the very least, was planning to do something.
So we can't blame Rhaegar (and Lyanna) for starting the war and we can't blame him either for abandoning Elia in King's Landing with no care about what happens next. So, again, what can we blame him for?
“It's not entirely correct that the Martells stayed out of the war. Rhaegar had Dornish troops with him on the Trident, under the command of Prince Lewyn of the Kingsguard. However, the Dornishmen did not support him as strongly as they might have, in part because of anger at his treatment of Elia, in part because of Prince Doran's innate caution.”
SSM, 09/11/1999
GRRM states that Dorne was angry about Rhaegar's treatment of Elia. What is this treatment, though?
Ned remembered the moment when all the smiles died, when Prince Rhaegar Targaryen urged his horse past his own wife, the Dornish princess Elia Martell, to lay the queen of beauty’s laurel in Lyanna’s lap.
Eddard XV, AGOT
Specifically, Rhaegar riding past Elia to crown Lyanna the Queen of Love and Beauty. Yes, that is a humiliation. And it's undeniable that no one was happy.
The crowning of the Stark girl, who was by all reports a wild and boyish young thing with none of the Princess Elia’s delicate beauty, could only have been meant to win the allegiance of Winterfell to Prince Rhaegar’s cause…Yet if this were true, why did Lady Lyanna’s brothers seem so distraught at the honor the prince had bestowed upon her? Brandon Stark, the heir to Winterfell, had to be restrained from confronting Rhaegar at what he took as a slight upon his sister’s honor…Eddard Stark, Brandon’s younger brother and a close friend to Lord Robert, was calmer but no more pleased.
“The Year of the False Spring”, The World of Ice and Fire
But, humiliating Elia is not the same thing as being responsible for her death. The narrative never equates these two things in any way. Elia's death is about Tywin's immoral and blood thirsty political actions. It's about Dorne's desire for justice (or is it vengeance?) which they know they will not get from the Lannister regime. House Lannister's downfall in King's Landing will be brought about by Prince Aegon's rise - Aegon who is proclaiming to be the long lost son of Prince Rhaegar, and who is being supported by House Martell as of now.
We can criticize Rhaegar for some things, but Elia's death is surely not one of them.
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grendel-menz · 2 years
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She cried with a piercing voice,
                calling upon her father [Zeus], the son of Kronos, the highest and the best.
                But not one of the immortal ones, or of human mortals,
           heard her voice. Not even the olive trees which bear their splendid harvest.
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tbgkaru-woh · 2 months
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100 Dialogue prompts
Trying this out (feel free to tweak out any grammatical errors) so writers who are bored, have at it! ♥ Mix of Fluff, Angst and Smut
“I don’t see you that way”
“I will just do as I’m told. As I’ve always done”
“Have you never ridden a bike/horse before?”
“You don’t have to be so…formal”
“What happened to us?”
“Good things don’t happen to me”
“Interested in palm reading?”
“Bowing to you felt right”
“There, let me help you.”
“Next time, listen to yourself and not me”
“Why do you want to get in trouble so badly?”
“It’s him/her…isn’t it?”
“Are you keeping it?”
“Good to see a familiar face”
“You never had to ask me anything, let alone beg”
“Oh you again?!”
“I need to take you somewhere”
“With you gone, everything went wrong”
“Insufferable, see you at dinner”
“I wasn’t kissing you, I was saving your life!”
“You did all this already, why not finish the job?”
“I will look for you”
“I couldn’t see anything, I couldn’t breathe”
“You knew about it?”
“I will atone for what he/she did”
“You need to start having some faith.”
“Say what you want, I know what I’m feeling is right”
“It’s okay, you will move on. We will move on.”
“How much do you miss him/her? And what if you didn’t have to?”
“Focus on my hands, on my voice…”
“Perhaps you need to be reminded where you belong”
“I was fine having a non-sexual relationship with you, but instead I’m having non-relationship sex with him/her.”
“I wanted to do it for you and in hindsight it was a terrible idea”
“I’ve been inside him/her more than outside him/her”
“Don’t ask me with ‘please’, you’re paying me”
“Oh why won’t you just die already”
“Sometimes I wonder for how long have you wanted his/her heart and if you will ever stop”
“Filthy cheater, we go again!”
“Didn’t you pay your debt already?”
“I can’t get sick/injured.”
“You act like you’ve never been defeated”
“Diamond thrown into the trash still has the value of a diamond”
“I got engaged”
“All this was decided for me, I had no choice”
“I’m beginning to think not even the jail guards/cops want you around, given how many times they’ve let me bail you out”
“You, sir/madam, should watch your alcohol intake”
“I’ve been denying everyone, you’re not special”
“I’m not looking for a romance”
“Isn’t that immoral enough to tempt you?”
“We’re two sides of the same fucked up coin”
“That’s what I like to see, you are your parents’ best indeed!”
“You have nothing to lose right?”
“Oh I can’t wait to hear you sing”
“Anything you’d like to add to the conversation?”
“Hi.”
“You need to stop making me pick you up in places someone may see”
“I thought I was a puppeteer pulling the strings but instead I was a back seat audience”
“I want names, I want addresses, I’m gonna make them pay.”
“You know where to find me if you ever want me again.”
“My mother is visiting in like 5 minutes”
“Is it that, or is it because you’re in love with me?”
“Not being able to reciprocate has been the hardest part of my life”
“Did you kill someone?”
“Envious of my youth, are we?”
“The others may have gotten away…”
“I found you. Found you looking like you didn’t want to be found”
“Did we use to be a thing?”
“I can fix this. I can fix this…”
“Weird question, are you a supernatural being? Be honest”
“We should have never played Gods”
“Must you be so harsh with me all the time?”
“What did all these men/women do to deserve you?”
“We have a reputation to uphold”
“May I have this dance?”
“I am a bad influence on you!”
“Let’s make history”
“Who the hell wants to live forever.”
“Feeling any different?”
“Time waits for no one”
“You got your happy-ever-after. And for all I know, it’s because I didn’t.”
“Try that again and you’re gonna lose it”
“Didn’t I say one of these days you’re gonna be the death of me?”
“Do you know what my answer was?”
“You look pathetic.”
“Almost didn’t recognize your voice when it’s not yelling at me”
“I often find myself talking to those no longer here as well”
“Excuse me, this is not a buffet”
“I don’t suspect you because I’m the one who put him/her in the ground”
“You look like someone who likes a good gamble”
“I am poison”
“Feel free to stay as long as you need”
“You don’t need to understand, just be a good little thing”
“I’m gonna need your driver’s license, your ID and your phone number please~”
“Say my name”
“You…are telling the truth”
“Is that why you did that? Back there?”
“Stop reading my mind”
“I can teach you”
“How can you laugh?”
“Pretty pictures. I don’t have any”
“Heaven may fall, but __ can’t die.”
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acourtofthought · 3 months
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"Elain draws away from Lucien because she doesn't like him and doesn't want him"
Really? An author who is notorious for hidden truths and "what you see isn't always what you get" yet some still believe she's resorting to something so simplistic for two of her future main characters? Two characters involved in Feyre's story from book 1 yet she's really gone the route of mating them in book 2 only to have them go absolutely nowhere together? To Elain ignoring her POC scarred mate because she's supposedly afraid of him though he literally does nothing but continue being as respectful as possible? Leaving her ex unharmed and not pushing her for anything?
This is the author who had Nesta push Cassian away time and again, looking to other males for physical release, only for us to find out she wanted Cassian from the first moment she met him and was terrified of what that meant.
But Elain definitely wants a relationship with Az because she was willing to kiss him and pushes Lucien away. 🤔
Wouldn't a more interesting reason for her behavior be something like this:
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Elain was devastated by Graysens rejection.
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She wept for hours at her father's headstone and continued to visit him at least once a month. We know she still mourned her lost life with Graysen in the novella as well.
Elain lost the two most important men in her life and it was very clearly a harrowing experience. She went from not eating, not sleeping, not drinking, and sitting silently in her room for months because of her lost humanity and separation from Graysen to Graysens rejection to the loss of her father.
And if those things felt that terrible, were that traumatic and she didn't even share a bond with either, then what do you think she'd feel if she were to open herself up to Lucien and he rejected her or he was killed?
In ACOWAR, she said that she could hear his heart, not just his heartbeat. And we know that part of what was in his heart at that moment was guilt over Jesminda's death and a feeling of betrayal towards her. .
If Graysens rejection of her stung as badly as it did, then what would a mates rejection feel like? Wondering whether she could ever compare to a female he pined for centuries after her death?
If her father's death was so painful, then what would the death of a mate feel like?
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Certain parts of the fandom create a version of Elain that is so one dimensional rather than giving her credit for possibly having feelings toward Lucien that are deep and complex. That she could be dealing with the fear of opening herself up to him and is also in tune with his fears and his sadness and it's all overwhelming and scary. He's not scary but the intensity of what could be and what could then be lost is.
That maybe, just maybe, Az (for as nice as he's been towards her) was not a scary option because she knew any rejection would not cut deeply (evidenced by the fact that nobody noted her being sad after Solstice). If Elain is as observant as the characters say she is, then there's little chance she hadn't noticed the way he looked at Mor and knew on some level who his heart belonged to, though he's been starting to realize he isn't going to end up with her. Maybe Feyre was right in saying that Elain and Az might find peace and quiet together, but maybe it was never meant to last. Peace and quiet is not what legendary romances are built on. Maybe the peace and quiet was only meant to hold them over until she (and he) were ready to stop being afraid and finally face the things that scared them. Until she was finally ready to take a chance to truly opening herself up again, not just physically but emotionally.
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ystrike1 · 1 year
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Meow Man - By Olso (8.5/10)
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Wanna hear a joke? Too bad. If you came here to read funny cat man jokes stop reading at chapter twenty. There is so much darkness hiding in the fractured world of cat and dog people. It comes out slowly. By the time you notice you're already sad. Yandere fans beware. Both of the toxic relationships here end, and the romance that wins is pure.
Prince Claude Cattington of the cat Kingdom is extremely handsome. He is also homeless, and his real body is a humanoid cat that looks like a mascot.
What a catch.
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Claude isn't special. There are lots of cats in human society, and lots of interbreeding has happened over the years. There are less pure cats than there used to be. Claude knows nothing. Bonnie picks him up. She doesn't throw him out because she's a moron. She loves pretty faces.
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Bonnie is a capable student with no worries. She just wants a hot boyfriend, and a cat. Claude wants to date her, but he also doesn't want to be homeless. The two don't date for a looong time. It takes over one hundred chapters. Claude falls in love first, but he was a sheltered and somewhat spoiled prince. He doesn’t flirt very well. Bonnie is a sucker for hotties. She's had a million crushes. She joins the fried chicken club to get close to Nathan, who runs it.
Nathan is in a toxic on again off again codependent relationship with a cat person named Frances. Here we get another nugget. The dog kingdom was destroyed hundreds of years ago. Nathan is a powerful purebreed who will never see his magical homeland. He's completely obsessed with Frances, because she trusted him with her secret past. She ran away from the cat kingdom, after a terrible magical fire left her scarred. Their relationship is a joke to their friends. Their constant breakups are seen as betting drama, but Nathan just isn't willing to be friends with Frances. He wants more in exchange for his loyalty.
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Frances kind of causes the story. Nathan is so obsessed that he lets Bonnie drool over him. He entices Bonnie to join the club, and he treats her well because Frances likes her. He is dead set on killing the cat who scarred Frances with fire, to earn her love and dependence forever. His nice guy act is good, but by the end of the series you can see he doesn't love Frances. He just loves controlling her.
Frances is in love with Bonnie. She continues to have feelings for Bonnie until the very end. Her character arc ends when she breaks up with Nathan for good. She did bad things. She used Nathan to get close to Bonnie. She was never honest, but she learned and changed.
That's a pretty goddamn deep lesson in a cat sexy guy webtoon.
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In the beginning Claude is NOT a good boyfriend. He is clingy and dependent and he relies on Bonnie for everything. He even starts fights. Hid presence affects her grades, but Claude is a good cat guy with a crush. He does what he can do. He cooks nutritious meals for Bonnie, because the Queen taught him to cook well.
He also gets a goddamn job, and he is excellent at it. He gets hired at a cafe, and he quickly gains fans. The fans bring in cash. A silly fanclub grows, and Claude starts to improve. He shows Bonnie that he cares.
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Bonnie sees him as a pet for a long time. She even falls for other men. Nathan, and then Claude's playboy coworker Doug. The gag is the owner only hires handsome men at her cafe. Doug has fans too, but he's a mutt. He's a dog that isn't pure. He can transform, but he doesn’t have super strength. He was bullied for that and he flirts with women for validation. This is where we learn about Bonnie. Bonnie doesn't date him. Bonnie eventually becomes his friend. He betrays her and they stay friends, because she knows he's a good guy under his past. He proves himself and he puts his own feelings aside so she can be happy with Claude.
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When Bonnie was young she had a black cat named Pepper. Pepper is the second prince. He hated his life, because Claude was the future king and he wasn’t. He wanted his father's love. He bullied Claude and he learned magic. Pepper is the most powerful magic cat. When he was little he summoned a great fire that killed hundreds of cats. It almost killed Frances, and it killed her sister.
He is the villain, and he loves Bonnie, because she is the only person who ever loved him.
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Princess Abby is the witness character. Through her we learn that Pepper isn't redeemable. His real name isn't even Pepper. He doesn't want the name his parents gave him anymore. He misses Bonnie, and he eventually finds her. Pepper isn't sorry. He thinks everyone who ignored him and his magical talent should suffer. Abby falls in love with Bonnie's incredibly kind best friend. Their romance really is one of the best parts of the series.
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Nathan almost kills Pepper. This pushes Frances to finally kick him out of her life. Pepper is powerful, and he's not lying. He loves Bonnie, and he wants Claude to rule the cat kingdom now. He says he'll stay with Bonnie, because she's all he wants, and Claude can do his duty. Claude chooses to leave. It's the right thing to do.
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Pepper tries to replace Claude in every way. He starts working at the cafe. He gets a fan club. He is respectful and corny with Bonnie, but it's too late. She misses Claude, but at least he is ruling his happy kingdom.
....
It's gone.
The cat kingdom is dead. The fire Pepper did damaged the royal family as a whole. Claude's parents exiled him to protect him. They called him weak because they loved him and they wanted him to be happy in the human realm. The rivers are dry. The flowers are gone. Every cat has left for the human world.
Pepper trapped Claude there with Abby, who is now suicidal. Her homeland is no more, just like the dog kingdom.
Pepper is the only one strong enough to open the gate again.
Claude barely manages to get back with his powers, but he can't save Abby.
Pepper has to.
He refuses. His lies catch up to him. He says he'll save Abby if Claude agrees to never be with Bonnie, but it's too late. He can't step in and have what Claude has. Claude is truly kind and caring. Pepper only came back to take Bonnie's love after the entire cat kingdom was ash.
That's not real love...or is it?
Pepper knows he cannot atone or be loved.
Bonnie gets attacked by a stalker he personally pissed off. As she dies he thinks about love, and how happy he was in the human world with Bonnie. When his parents exiled him it wasn't out of love.
He was a monster, but Bonnie loved him.
He uses a special spell. It erases his existence to make Bonnie's wish come true. She survives, and everyone she loves is blissfully happy. Abby and her best friend Jina are dating. Frances is a flirt around her, and Nathan doesn't hang out with them anymore. Claude is her loving boyfriend. Her friends are all enjoying life, because it's what she wished for.
She wanted to be a part of her friend's happy lives. She grew and matured into someone special, who is the absolute life of her friend group.
Sometimes, she feels like something is missing. Only sometimes. She's so happy that it's hard to remember why. There are no exceptions. Everyone forgets Pepper, which is painfully ironic. He threw away his old identity to chase Bonnie, and then he gave having an identity up for her. In an attempt to make up for what he put her through.
His death was the only good thing he ever did.
*The art style makes this a hard sell...
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foxounderscorecube · 1 year
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Shatter Me - Tahereh Mafi
3¼ ⭐
CW: SA and stuff that could maybe be triggering if you have an ED
I feel kind of unsure how to rate this. Essentially, the story itself didn't do much for me, but I found it really compelling - I wanted to keep reading it and I was a bit disappointed to come to the end.
I love the writing style. I think it does very well at bringing the reader into the chaos and intensity of Juliette's mind as a traumatised, terrified teenager, and the writing becomes more or less frantic with her emotions. Oddly, there is a note at the start of the book explaining this narrative technique, which I can't blame the writer for because it's just as, if not more, likely to have been the publisher's idea. Bit of a shame, though - like explaining the punchline to a joke. Nonetheless, I think that's what drew me in to the narrative: the way that Juliette's feelings are expressed is lovely and makes her feel more human.
The romance with Adam was okay. I think it's a bit weird that he found out he could touch her unharmed because he was caressing her in her sleep when she was having nightmares, but his feelings for her come off as sincere. I think she genuinely loves him but sometimes I couldn't help but think that surely, affection from nearly anyone will feel amazing and that could make her think she's in love even if she isn't. I mean, you only have to look at her weirdly conflicting emotions towards War Criminal Warner to see that.
Ah, yes, War Criminal Warner. He's a pervert and a pathetic nepotism baby and likes to kill people for fun. He turns up to be emotionally abusive and sexually inappropriate towards Juliette, intending on grooming her into his weapon/consort. She inexplicably still thinks he's hot. Sometimes, it feels like this book is resisting the urge to become Baby's First Dark Romance and go down his route. Towards the end, when she and Adam have escaped and later get caught, Warner has found out he can also touch her without being hurt, and so starts being even more handsy than usual. She spots a gun in his inside coat pocket and decides to go with it despite her discomfort just long enough to get the gun and shoot him, which is a bit of a girlboss move. So he's making out with her and picking her up by the arse and all this and she starts off being "ew yucky nasty Warner, this isn't my One and Only True Love Adam" and then thinks "…actually, I'm kinda into this". What??? I know that sort of thing is a trope in dark romance as a genre, but that is one of the reasons I do not read dark romance. The whole "this is sexual assault but actually I like it" thing is just gross to me. If you're into it as a fantasy and within the constrains of fiction, I can't stop you, but it's not my cup of tea at all. Although I see how Adam can be viewed as a bit bland (he is), Warner is, like, bland with a bit of black pepper. I have a soft spot for pathetic men and for crazy sadistic characters, albeit typically not in romance, but he's just not very sexy about it. He's just a bit sad, to me. I don't care if his eyes are light green or whatever.
Juliette is incredibly horny in general. It's kind of funny sometimes. She'll experience the most traumatising shit you can think of and then Adam will touch her arms and she'll be like "oh YEAH babey". To be fair, though, she is the most touch-starved person of all time, so maybe that's not that weird.
This isn't a criticism, but a thing I noticed that I found strange. So, Juliette has been given maybe one small meal a day for the best part of a year, and presumably must be terribly underweight and look like she's on death's door. Even after eating normally for a couple of weeks, she's probably not looking exactly healthy. That's whatever in itself, that's just the nature of being imprisoned in an inhumane asylum. But there're consistent reminders of how tiny and little and small Juliette is that… well, it kind of gave me the ick. Look, I've got a height complex three times my size, so I'm not a fan of big height differences personally. I don't want to feel even shorter than I am. But with the context meaning she's probably very very skinny and frail as well, it made me a bit uncomfy. I don't know if this is just a straight woman thing that I don't get, a romance trope that I wouldn't have come across, or if the writer has a mild macro/micro kink that's coming through or what, which is why, even if I didn't like it, I don't mean it as critique. It just stood out to me.
The ending left more questions than answers because it's part of a series. That's fair. Still, I like that she found a community with other people with powers similar to hers. I think that's cool. I don't know if I'll read the other books, though. I'm kind of happy imagining that she lived safe and happily with Adam and it's all okay now, but then it was a fun book to read even if my review probably comes across as miserable so hey, we'll see!
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rec-review8890 · 2 years
Text
Books To Be Read…
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A Thousand Ships
By: Natalie Haynes
Summary: From the Trojan women whose fates now lie in the hands of the Greeks, to the Amazon princess who fought Achilles on their behalf, to Penelope awaiting the return of Odysseus, to the three goddesses whose feud started it all, these are the stories of the women whose lives, loves, and rivalries were forever altered by this long and tragic war.
A woman’s epic, powerfully imbued with new life, A Thousand Ships puts the women, girls and goddesses at the center of the Western world’s great tale ever told.
。・°°・°°・。 。・°°・°°・。 。・°°・°°・。
Ariadne
By: Jennifer Saint
Summary: Ariadne, Princess of Crete, grows up greeting the dawn from her beautiful dancing floor and listening to her nursemaid’s stories of gods and heroes. But beneath her golden palace echo the ever-present hoofbeats of her brother, the Minotaur, a monster who demands blood sacrifice.
When Theseus, Prince of Athens, arrives to vanquish the beast, Ariadne sees in his green eyes not a threat but an escape. Defying the gods, betraying her family and country, and risking everything for love, Ariadne helps Theseus kill the Minotaur. But will Ariadne’s decision ensure her happy ending? And what of Phaedra, the beloved younger sister she leaves behind?
Hypnotic, propulsive, and utterly transporting, Jennifer Saint's Ariadne forges a new epic, one that puts the forgotten women of Greek mythology back at the heart of the story, as they strive for a better world.
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The Soul of Love
By: E.X. Alexander
Summary: Eons ago, he was torn asunder. Will a romance with a human restore him to glory?
Ancient Greece. Eros wants it all back. Determined to return to his rightful throne as ruler of the world, the God of Love searches for his lost soulmate so he may once again be whole. But when he’s sent on a mission of vengeance, the scheming deity is stunned to discover the mortal object of his vendetta is the very woman he’s been seeking.
Psyche hates her own beauty. Tormented by a jealous Aphrodite and uncertain who she can trust, the vulnerable peacemaker is caught off-guard by a stranger’s sudden courtship. And though he whisks her to a private island to protect her from divine wrath, the lovely girl suspects her gallant rescuer is hiding some terrible truths.
Marrying the gorgeous woman in secret, Eros still conceals his true identity from his wife as he looks for a way to recover her memories. But as Psyche suffers from terrifying nightmares, she’s unaware a devastating betrayal will endanger her husband’s life… and that of their unborn child.
With civil war looming among the gods, does this star-crossed pair have any hope for happiness?
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A Spark of Death and Fury
By: Nicole Bailey
Coming out September 27, 2022
Summary: The world is on fire. But one thing burns hotter. Revenge.
The high gods have fallen. The spark is gone. And chaos is the new king.
Amidst a scrabble to survive, gods step up to steal Zeus’ place. The treachery they cause pushes characters’ moral boundaries and forces them into one last fight for survival.
A blaze of wrath may save them all or finally lead to their ruin.
A Spark of Death and Fury is the riveting fourth installment of the Apollo Ascending series, full of love, heartbreak, and unexpected turns wrapped in an explosive finale.
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If We Could Go Back
By: Cara Dee
Summary: My sister asked me if I could stand the sight my own reflection, if I’d caused enough damage yet, but I didn’t see myself when I looked into the mirror. I saw Kieran standing behind me, pressing a kiss to my shoulder while he undid my belt. I saw everything I wanted that I couldn’t have. Not unless I was prepared to hurt everyone around me.
Kieran was in a similar situation.
Were we monsters or men? Were they one and the same? Did we give a flying f—hell. We did care. Just not enough to stop, not enough to walk away, and I knew we constantly asked ourselves the same question because of it. If we could go back to when we met on the train…if we could erase the deceit, erase our first hello…would we?
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countarganan · 2 years
Note
top 3 headcanons that anyone writing with me should know about ! ~For both Arganan and Calista
@worldofsenelfy
Arganan
Arganan DOES regret abusing Calista and is actively trying to make amends with her by post-game. Considering that it's canon that he does regret this as stated in his journal that you can find in his office, during the game's epilogue, I imagine that by post-canon (assuming her survived) that he would do anything he could to be a better uncle. And I'm still salty that the game killed him off instead of giving him the chance to redeem himself at least a bit.
Arganan is bisexual with a preference for men, and he keeps his sexuality mostly private. He might be more open in talking about this with his respective loved ones and around others who are more open about non-heteronormative romance, but widely publicly he's not going to speak much about it. (He also has a tendency to fall for people that are much more powerful than him lol.)
The closer you are to him, the more comfortable he is swearing in your presence. He will, without reservations, say the f-word in a dire situation if you're close enough to him. This would be out of place for him to do at Lazulis Castle in general, but still. XD
Calista
Calista is trying to be more actively communicative with her uncle by post-game. Calista mentions in game's canonical dialogue (during the epilogue when visiting Arganan's empty office) that she didn't talk to him much. And though yes, Arganan was terrible and clearly is to blame for most of their terrible relationship during the game, I think their dysfunctional relationship went both ways to an extent. Since Arganan is trying to make amends with her (see headcanon 1 for Arganan listed above), Calista is trying to be more open with him in turn.
Calista is extremely aware that Zael has little experience in politics compared to her, and is also aware that there are people that will compare her way of ruling Lazulis to her uncle. Because of this she feels a lot of stress and pressure by post-canon to rule Lazulis well, especially since Lazulis and the Gurak Continent just finally started being at peace again. If it fails, everyone will blame her for it (or so she thinks at least).
3. Even after becoming Countess, Calista still enjoys going outside the castle. It could be in disguise or out of disguise, but Calista wants to have opportunities to go out and just kinda chill and explore. It's a nice break from all the castle duties (though it doesn't stop her loved ones from worrying about her safety).
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lubdubsworld · 3 years
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Change of Heart ( Taehyung ) ( Complete.
Chapter 1   Chapter 2    Chapter 3     Chapter 4     Chapter 5   Chapter 6  Chapter 7   Chapter 8    Chapter 9
Summary : Times are changing. After years of being oppressed, werewolves are taking a stand against humans , demanding equal rights and fair treatment. Heading the movement is Kim Taehyung, the breathtaking heir to the Kim fortune and one of the few remaining Alpha werewolves in the country. His disdain for the human race is well known and well warranted. They killed his family after all….. He wants to change the world , to put humans in their place but when his five year old daughter takes a shine to their very human neighbor , maybe he has to start with a change of heart , first.
: Pairing : Taehyung x OC / Werewolf AU!!
Genre : Romance, Explicit Content
Chapter 10
“Baby....you up?” Taehyung sleep heavy voice against my ear made me stir, blinking groggily as I tried to make sense of where I was. The window was still dark and I groaned. 
“What time is it?” I whispered and I felt the press of his lips against my shoulder, gentle and wet. 
“It’s a little past five in the morning.”
I whined in disbelief.
“Why would you wake me up so early?” 
I could barely see him in the darkness and I felt my breath catch when he moved to straddle my hips, hovering over me before grabbing the back of my thighs, spreading my legs apart and leaning down till the head of his cock pressed right up against my entrance. I felt myself clenching in anticipation and my body thrummed with the need to be filled, although I was still so sore from last night. 
“I’m sorry.... I need to head out but i wanted to...” Taehyung whispered, and I moaned when he kissed me  lightly, groaning when he slid right in, cleaving a way inside me, my walls pulsing around the hard length of. I flinched, the dull ache of it making me whimper a little and it took some effort to ground myself, to relax and not seize up against the intrusion. I could feel my heartrate speeding up, the last vestiges of sleep fading into the air. 
Taehyung, pressed gentle fingers to my waist, stroking my skin before running them up my torso, soft little touches to my ribs and up to my breasts, cupping the warm weight of them before rubbing his thumb over the tip till my nipples hardened. 
“So pretty...like this...” He whispered, pulling out and pushing back in and the movement jarred my insides , drawing a pout onto my lips. 
“you’re too big..” I complained and he responded by moving his hands to my knees, gripping the back of them and drawing them up and apart till I choked, spreading me so wide that my thighs screamed in protest, and he laughed at the look on my face .
“We should join a yoga class or something. Your flexibility is atrocious.” He commented mildly and I gasped, affronted. 
“What on earth-” He cut me off with a kiss, before grabbing my ankle and throwing my leg over his shoulder and pressing in closer, his cock sliding in even deeper. I choked out, laughing in sheer disbelief because I wasn’t made to bend like that. Nobody was. I was sure of it. 
“You’ll get used to it...” Taehyung laughed, “ Get used to me... Get used to my kisses and of course get used to my fat cock in you every damn night. ” he growled and the filthy words made me clench down on him, so hard that i almost cramped up. 
He kissed me slowly and I wrapped one arm around his neck, trying to breathe through the stretch of him fucking into me, each push and pull abrasive but amazing. . 
I stared at his beautiful face, trying to drink in the features, and I felt myself fall deeper, the look of affection in his gaze somehow so much more arousing than the things he was doing to me. And i realized how badly I wanted this...This and him for the rest of my life. 
And in the wake of it came the reminder that +my father was out there. 
A powerful man. 
A dangerous man who wanted Taehyung gone.
“Are you going to be in danger?” I whispered, pressing my palm against his face and he chuckled. He lightly grabbed my wrist and pressed a kiss to my palm before bringing my hand down to his shoulder and kissing me gently. 
“I always am.” He reminded me , lips brushing mine . It was far from reassuring and I gripped his shoulders harder, trying not to let the anxiety take over. 
“But you’ll be safe, right?” I demanded, willing him to look me in the eye and Taehyung gave me a soft smile.
“Would you miss me terribly if I was gone?” He grinned and I felt my entire body go ice cold at the very prospect of it , my lips parting and my mouth going sandpaper dry.  Taehyung’s smile faded at once, his arms tightening around me. 
“Hey...hey... I was just joking...baby. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have joked about that. Rae, I’m going to be fine... Look at me. ” He whispered urgently and I curled my fingers into his shoulders, trying to breathe. 
“Hey...Come on, Rae.. Don’t look so scared. ..” He pressed kisses to my cheeks and I swallowed.
“Don’t underestimate my father. Tae....“ I said hoarsely.” He has so much more to lose than you do. He’s desperate and I don’t want you to be blindsided by anything. “ I whispered. 
He nodded.
“i know. i won’t. Now come on, let me make you feel good, yeah?” He kissed me again and I hugged him. He picked up the pace, thrusting into me faster and I closed my eyes, gripping his waist and hanging on as he sent my senses into overdrive. 
My mind was still too worried to experience any sort of overwhelming pleasure but I liked this. 
Liked having him like this, over me, inside me and wrapped all around me,. 
It meant he was safe. At least for this moment, he was here and he was safe. 
I felt the moment his orgasm hit him, warm wetness spilling into me and I closed my eyes at the sensation, blushing for some reason.
This time i felt him swelling inside me again and I froze, panic starting before I could stop it and he hugged me closer, lips pressing soothing kisses as he stroked my skin, gently soothing. 
“it’s okay baby... You’re mine... You were made for me. it won’t hurt... I promise.” He whispered, holding me closer, and I swallowed, bracing myself . 
“Oh, God, Taehyung... “ I whispered, burying my face into his shoulder as he pressed in a little deeper and he was right. It didn’t hurt, it felt overwhelming, like it was too much and like I was going to absolutely explode but it didn’t hurt. ....
Taehyung trembled a little, as he tried not to move, his knot lodging itself deep inside me, so deep that the smallest movement sent pin pricks of sensation all over my body. It didn’t even feel weird or animalistic anymore I thought , awed. it felt normal. Felt like us. Him and I locked together. Felt natural.  Or maybe the early morning grogginess was making me mellow. Maybe once i had my head on straight, I’d be more terrified. 
He groaned into my shoulders, body going lax on top of me and I choked a little because he was heavy, but there was a dull throbbing pleasure in it, the weight of him grounding me. 
I stared up at the ceiling, stroking the back of his head as he shuddered a little inside me. 
Time seemed endless as he stayed inside me and I felt my eyelids growing heavy, even as I heard his breathing even out.
Wasn’t he supposed to leave? 
But I couldn’t bring myself to wake him up. 
For a few more minutes, I stayed still, watching the windows grow lighter and as the first rays of the morning sun began spilling into the room, I felt sleep take over. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I won’t be going in at all. The Narcotic department is going to handle the whole thing. You know Namjoon and Seokjin right? They’re the one who’re going to be there and they’re going to make sure things go smoot. I’m going to be safe ...in the comfort of my luxurious office .... “ Taehyung’s voice  sounded completely steady and firm through the phone and i willed myself to trust him. 
Luna sat in my lap, happily sketching on a drawing pad as we sat cross legged in front of the huge French Windows in Jungkook’s apartment. Jungkook himself was in the kitchen, whipping up some milkshakes for us. 
I sighed deeply.
“ Can we come over today then? It ends today right?” I asked urgently. I buried my nose in Luna’s hair and the sweet scent of green apple and strawberries made me melt. She turned around to flash me a wide grin, eyes dancing with happiness. 
Taehyung didn’t respond for a few seconds. When he did, his voice was low and soothing. 
“I’m not sure Rae. These men, they aren’t the kind of people I can take lightly. There are going to be repercussions and I don’t want anything to happen to you or Luna. You’re safe there. Jungkook’s going to stay with you till I come get you and I’ve hired enough men to keep watch. I just need to hang around long enough to make sure we end this cleanly. “
“Okay. I love-”
“Don’t.” He said softly. 
I blinked.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s the first time I’m hearing you say that. I’d rather hear it in person.” Taehyung said softly. 
I laughed.
“You’re such a sap.”
“Only for you. Now, what is my feral daughter upto?” 
“Luna, Dada wants to talk to you...” I handed the phone over to her and she squealed.
“Hi Daddy....” She said cutely. “ When are you coming home daddy?” 
I couldn’t hear his side of the conversation but the pout on her face told me that she wasn’t pleased.
“But that’s soooo long....”
“I was drawing . RaeRae showed me how to draw a wolf. It looks angry like daddy.”
“No daddy, I’m being a good girl. I ate a bowl of rice and veggies too.” 
“I don’t miss daddy because RaeRae’s here.” 
And then she giggled.
“Of course not daddy...you’re both number one.” 
A sound at the door made me look up and Jungkook held the door in place with his leg, flipping the doorjamb down before carefully carrying the tray of milkshakes in. 
I gently maneuvered Luna off my lap before moving to help him. 
“Smells delicious, Mr. Jeon.” I grinned, taking a sip of the chocolate concoction. “Ooh..that's really good.”
“Its a premade mix I added water to.” Jungkook grinned. I laughed. 
“ Still a great cook !” I turned to watch Luna who was now flat on her back on the rug and going on about how Jungkook had let her borrow his sketching tab. 
“She’s adorable.” He commented with a smile and I hummed.
“When are you heading back to the preserve?” I asked gently and he shrugged.
“Not for a while. Taehyung told me they’re not yet sure how far this whole drug thing has spread. There’s going to be a lot of arrests and protests in the next few weeks. Messing with a wolf’s ability to scent his mate...that’s terrible stuff, Rae. Wolves are gonna be fucking furious. There’s going to be a huge fall out over this and we can only hope it wouldn’t be too violent.” 
I swallowed.
“Do you think I could get my job back, at the preserve?”
Jungkook looked surprised.
“You’re not gonna be with Tae?”
I turned to stare at Luna.
“Of course I’ll be with Tae but.. i love my job. I made a difference there. I’m not going to make a good trophy wife. I want to be able to help people in someway, not just hang around in the backdrop.” I said desperately.
Jungkook looked worried. 
“I’m not sure if Tae will agree to that Rae. You know how he gets about his job. As his wife you’ll have plenty of stuff to do as it is..,....”
“I’m not his wife...” I muttered under my breath, although it was kind of a useless statement.
“ Umm...you know he’s going to ask you to marry him as soon as possible? You’re already wearing his mark. in fact , in our world you’re already married as far as we’re concerned,” Jungkook pointed at my neck and I rubbed the small scar on my shoulder where he’d bitten me. 
“I can still do the things I want to do right? Taehyung isn’t going to lock me up , is he?” I laughed.
Jungkook tilted his head, watching me carefully.
“You don’t know him very well, do you Rae?” He said quietly. 
My heart flipped over in my ribcage at the words and the tone with which he said it. 
“What-What do you mean?:” I asked , nervous. 
Jungkook opened his mouth to respond, only to be interrupted by Luna’s laugh. 
“RaeRae!!! Daddy wants to talk to you!!” Luna came bounding over with the phone held out and I took it from her.
“Tae?”
“I’m going to head in now. We’re going to be coordinating with Seoul PD and they’ll send the guys in around 2 hours. You’re going to  okay right? I’ll call you when it’s over?” 
“Okay, Tae. Stay safe.” I whispered.
“I’ll be just fine. Don’t worry about me. Love you. Both of you. ”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jungkook and i sat on the couch, eyes glued on the TV as the news played out watching the entire country erupt in chaos. 
“Fire broke out today on a popular resort in Jeju Do, owned by  Hotelier Cha Eun Woo..... Interestingly, the resort had been closed for the weekend with minimal staff and only a few VVIP customers . So far there have been reports of nine casualties, all of them guests including billionaire philanthropist Yoon Jae hyun....”
I felt the breath shudder out of me, equal parts relief and disbelief. Taehyung had closed the whole thing down with minimum fanfare and with no one any the wiser. I knew that the eight men were the major distributors in the entirety of Korea, and that with them gone, it would only be a matter of time before the entire racket collapsed. 
“These guys are good.” Jungkook commented mildly and I stared at the screen, fascinated... The whole thing was being written off as an unfortunate tragedy, a gas leak or something.  
A small crowd of people in uniforms stood huddled in a corner and I squinted, grinning when I caught sight of Kim Seokjin’s golden blonde head and Kim Namjoon’s tall figure, dressed like waiters. .
I felt my lips quirk at that. 
The phone rang just then and I exhaled, “ Taehyung...”
“Did I do good?” He whispered. 
I laughed. 
“ I think I know now, why you’re an amazing politician Kim Taehyung ssi. “ I said softly. 
Taehyung chuckled.
“Real life isn’t like the movies baby.... I suppose you were looking forward to some good old fashioned action sequences and a lot of alpha posturing?” He teased. 
I smiled.
“I’m just glad you’re safe. “ I whispered. 
“I’m sending a limo to Jungkook’s place. You should  come over to my condo.  I have a present for you. Will you come? ” He said gently. 
Curiosity piqued, “ Of course. I’ll be there. What is it?”
Taehyung laughed softly, his voice deep. 
“I think you’ll like it.”
I stared at Jungkook, who could probably hear the conversation.
He had a very odd expression on his face. Part resignation and Part worry. 
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.. I’m just thinking that I’m lucky...”
“Lucky?”
“That I didn’t think about pursuing you. “ 
I laughed. 
“What do you mean?”
“I’m just saying. i wouldn’t want to be on Kim Taehyung’s hit list.” 
I rolled my eyes. 
“Don’t be dramatic.” 
“I’m not. Be careful Rae. He’s a very dangerous man.” Jungkook said quietly, picking up the smaller glass of strawberry milk and lifting Luna up into his arms. i watched him laugh and carry her to the balcony. 
And i wondered what that was about. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“So , what’s the present?” I asked impishly , wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him soundly. He hugged me close, reciprocating with fervor and I moaned into his mouth. I could kiss him forever.
“Patience , little one. It’s on the way. First , tell me is your brother alright? I’ve been trying to reach him but i can’t.” He sounded worried and i felt warmth bloom in my chest.
“Yuggie’s fine. He left his phone somewhere ...i spoke to him on the way here. He’s upset of course but for now, he’s not going to come anywhere near the family business. My father handed things over to his nephew a few years ago is what I heard. Yuggie’s heading back to the States after the funeral.”
“What’s his name? This nephew...do you know? ” Taehyung asked thoughtfully.
“Kim Ji Hoo. He owns a bunch of casinos across the country. When I was in college i once heard him talk about getting girls from somewhere to my dad. I don’t remember where .... ” I said apologetically. 
“That’s fine angel. Thank you for telling me... I’ll keep an eye on him.” Taehyung said with a smile. 
“So this is it? The drug racket is down??” I asked nervously and he sighed.
“Hardly. We don’t know a lot of things but the Narcs caught a lot of evidence today from these idiots and their laptops and phones. Seokjin and Namjoon are going to head the investigation. We’ll probably not reveal anything to the public until we know the true extent of the operations.”
“Which would be once you get to the local dealers.”
“Yes.... but that is out of my jurisdiction so I’m going to respectfully step away and let them do their job.” He smiled. 
“And the whole sex trade thing in Eun Woo’s hotel..What about that?”
“We rescued the girls earlier. There were seventeen of them, three of them underage.” His voice shook a little. 
“He’s a monster. I’m glad he’s dead.” I whispered. 
A knock on the door made us pull away from each other. 
“Speaking off, your present’s here...” He smiled. 
Grinning , i turned to the door.
And then the smile froze on my face when I saw who it was. 
Seokjin stood framed in the door way, dragging another man in front of him. I couldn’t see who it was because of the black bag over his head. 
“Special delivery for Alpha Kim.” He grinned, shoving the man forward till he crashed to his knees in front of me. Seokjin pulled the bag off . 
“Taehyung.” I froze in disbelief, staring at the familiar man in front of me , on his knees , bloodied and battered, wrists caught in handcuffs and face swollen and gagged..
Cha Eun Woo was almost unrecognizable. 
Taehyung stepped right up behind me wrapping both hands around me in a warm back hug, chin resting on my shoulder as he peered down at the beta wolf. 
“Do you like your present?” He whispered, kissing my neck gently. 
“Taehyung, what is this?” I said , my fingers shaking a little, my skin icy cold because of how cruel Taehyung looked and sounded, talking down to Cha Eun Woo. 
“I thought you’d enjoy a little action, angel... Life get’s boring sometimes if I don’t indulge my wolf once in a while, don’t you think, baby?” 
 “Tae, no.” i said desperately. “ Let him go. please don’t...”
Taehyung hummed. 
“Are you sure baby? You don’t wanna see how us wolves solve things?” 
I shook my head frantically. 
“No.. No I don’t wanna see you kill another man.” I laughed, voice just a little hysterical because why did this even have to be said. When Taehyung said present I was thinking a bottle of champagne and some roses.... not the prospect of cold blooded murder..... . “ Please.,.just... Don’t.” 
Taehyung pulled away from me and moved forward. I stumbled back and away, watching as he reached Eun Woo, hand reaching out to hold the man by his hair, the veins in his hand pulsing from how tight his grip was. 
Eun Woo whimpered, moaning out slurred syllables that were impossible to understand because of the gag in his mouth. 
“Are you sure angel? “ Taehyung pouted, holding one hand out.. I flinched when his claws popped out , three inches long and sharp as razors. 
My throat went dry as he grabbed Eun Woo by the shoulder, claws digging straight in with so much force that blood spurted out .
I whirled around, looking away , pressing my hands to my eyes, a scream forming at the back of my throat threatening to spill out.
Taehyung groaned in disappointment. 
“Fine. I won’t kill him.” He said boredly. “ Seokjin...” 
I turned back around , staring at him. Taehyung looked as he always did , a soft smile playing around his lips, eyes kind and warm ,  his voice even tempered and gentle. 
But the unconscious man at his feet, the pool of blood spreading out over the carpet , the mangled shoulder..... they didn’t fit into the picture. 
And suddenly, I understood just why everyone was afraid of him. 
Seokjin appeared at the door. He glanced at Eun Woo and wrinkled his nose.
“Did the bitch pass out again? i swear to God, my grandmother has a higher tolerance for pain than this fucker...” He glanced at Taehyung.
“Tie things up yeah?” Taehyung said evenly and Seokjin nodded, dragging the prone body away. 
“You look terrified.” Taehyung smiled, moving to the mahogany sideboard and grabbing a bottle of water. i watched as he casually washed his hands , getting rid of the blood. 
“You... Would you have killed him? If I didn’t ask you to stop?”
Taehyung stopped scrubbing under his nails, giving me a look.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you.. do you do this often? Kill people?” I said shrilly. 
Taehyung laughed. 
“You were plenty happy when I killed your father.” He pointed out. 
I swallowed. 
“That’s...That’s different.. He’s... He deserved it...” 
“And Eun Woo doesn’t? Come on , Rae...what he was doing with those girls was filthy.” 
“Yes.. yes but...” i was so confused, my brain refusing to come to terms with the fact that Taehyung, the man i loved, actually killed people. Personally. 
“Anyway... you told me to stop and i stopped. Didn’t kill him, right?” He smiled. 
I nodded. 
“Thank you for letting him live.” I whispered , turning away . I could feel a head ache come on. .
“Oh, i didn’t let him live.... He’s still going to die.” Taehyung said casually. 
I whirled around , gaze clashing with his as my lips parted in surprise. 
“You.. You said you weren’t going to kill him...” I said hoarsely. 
Taehyung blinked at me, looking confused. He grabbed a pure white towel, wiping his wet hands carefully. 
“Yes, I said  I  wouldn’t kill him. Seokjin will.” He said casually. 
My entire body went cold at that, sweat gathering on my hairline because of how scared I suddenly was. 
“Taehyung ...this isn’t... this scares me.” I whispered, taking a step back. 
He laughed at that, moving closer and reaching for me.
“Come now, angel. You know i have to right? Men like Eun Woo don’t change... He’ll find something more vile and awful to do , probably even try to get back at me by trying to hurt you or Luna... i can’t have that can I?”
“So you just...you kill people who get in your way?” I felt like I had been dipped in a vat full of cold water. Taehyung drew me into his arms, hugging me close.
“Only when I am protecting something i value.” He said softly. “ I can’t afford loose ends, Rae. They get tangled together and trip me up. As my wife, i expect you to trust me. Trust that i won’t do anything without reason.” 
“I’m not your wife.” I said dully, feeling just a little overwhelmed.
“Semantics.” He brushed my words off easily, pulling back to rub his fingers across my cheeks.
“I’m being sworn in officially, tomorrow. I want you by my side on the podium. You and our daughter. I know its going to be new to you... My world. But I think you’ll like it. I’m the king there and I want you to be my queen. ” He kissed me gently. 
I stared at him, this man who i loved because of the side of him I had seen so far. The kind, considerate father, the passionate leader and the tenderly sweet lover. 
But then i remembered the cold cruelty with which he had dug his claws into Eun Woo, who was after all a childhood friend of his. Was this the other side of Kim Taehyung’s perfection? Was he also a ruthless , heartless man who would do anything to protect his interests , destroy anyone who got in his way?  
I pulled back an away . 
“Taehyung are we rushing into this? I... do you think we should slow down? Maybe date a little and-”
He didn’t reply, his face unreadable. 
“And where do you intend to live?” He said quietly. “ You don’t have a job.”
“The preserve....”
“....no longer hires humans. The law came through last week.” 
It was like a knife slashed right through my insides. 
“What?” i whispered, confused. 
Taehyung inhaled sharply. 
“We talked about this? There are a lot of qualified weres who don’t have a job, who cannot find work here in the mainland.”
“And what about me? The preserve is the only place where there’s a laboratory studying werewolf microbiology which is kind of what I’ve majored in. I can’t work anywhere else .” I said softly.
Taehyung sighed.
“Baby, hear me out... As my wife, you’ll be heading charities, working with the most intelligent people in the country , running organizations that directly help improve quality of life for underprivileged weres everywhere. It is so much bigger than anything you could accomplish in that tiny laboratory in the island. “
“So, I just move in with you right away?” I asked quietly, already knowing the answer. 
Taehyung gave me that same, maddeningly rational look. 
“The customs department is going to go through your father’s assets... Everything he owned is going to come under scrutiny and I’m sure his wealth is going to dwindle to nothing once they’re through with him. As it is, I know he wrote you out of his will. If you’re going to insist on working some minimum wage job , living in a dilapidated apartment somewhere just because you think, we’re going too fast...” He smiled, “ I’m going to have to put my foot down.” 
And in a moment of startling clarity I just knew exactly what he’d done. 
“You planned this didn’t you? “ I blinked at him. “ It’s surreal, all these pieces falling into place so perfectly..... You knew I would want to  go back to my job in the preserve . That i would never agree to marry you so quickly. Why else would you rush a law like that? “ 
Taehyung didn’t reply. 
“i know how laws are passed Taehyung. You must’ve put quite the pressure on your bosses, to pass such a mundane law so fast...” 
He stared back at me without an ounce of guilt in his gaze. 
“I won’t apologize for wanting my mate by my side.” He said evenly. 
“Will you apologize for being a cunningly manipulative bastard, then ?” 
“you’re over reacting...” He said calmly. 
“Am I, Taehyung?” I said sharply. “ It’s been a week since I found out i was your mate. A week.... And now suddenly, i have your mark on my neck, no possibility of getting my job back and no other option but to cling to you.... I’d say I’m reacting how any woman would react.... You played me like a fiddle and I’ve been dancing to your tune all along. “ 
Taehyung sighed. 
“You make it sound like I’ve done something terrible. “
“ Haven’t you?? “ i demanded. 
“ No, I haven’t. I love you. I care for you deeply and so does my daughter. She needs you as much as i do and she loves you so much. Your own family is almost non existent right now. your brother is three thousand miles away and I am here offering you my love, my home and the chance to be a part of my family. Tell me what are you losing out on? Tell me what it is I’ve taken away from you?” 
 My choice,  I thought with clarity. You’ve taken away my right to make that choice. 
 He held my face gently, thumbs brushing across my cheeks. 
“I know you’re frightened. But trust me. I’m going to be here by your side. Eun Woo dies today, not because of those girls he destroyed but because of  you. Because he dared touch you , knowing you were mine . Tomorrow the whole country will know it and no one will dare to even breath wrong in your direction. Because they know what your mate is capable of.” 
He pressed a kiss to my forehead and I let him hug me, staring over his back at the opposite wall. 
The painting on the wall caught my eye. 
A beautiful, dainty gazelle, cornered against the edge of a huge cliff,  staring down the barrel of a hunter’s gun. And on her side, a big beautiful wolf , gorgeous and tempting as it seemed to call for her. And it was obvious that in her panic , she was going to run into the arms of the wolf. 
Not knowing that the wolf was just as dangerous, just as deadly as the hunter and the cliff edge. 
I closed my eyes hugging him tight. 
I was so tired. 
“Tell me you’ll marry me. “ Taehyung’s hypnotic voice wove its spell over me, soft and soothing and filled with all the reassurances a naïve young girl would ever need.  
I took a deep breath, trembling in his arms when i exhaled. 
And then I replied. 
The End 
~~~~~~~~
Author’s note : Tell me how much you hate me. 
Taehyung isn’t a saint wbk. So of course there’s going to be a sequel.
Soon. Hopefully. 
Taglist : @veronawrites
@ladyartemesia
@bumb1e-bee
@jeonlovescoffee
@bonyg
@unicornbabylover
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euterpessi · 3 years
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Romance Manhwa/Manga Recommendations:
Historical Manhwa/Manga:
Death Is The Only Ending For The Villainess
I’ve reincarnated as the reverse harem game’s villainess, the one and only adopted daughter of the ducal Eckart family.
But the difficulty just has to be the worst!
Everything I do will only lead me to death.
I must be paired with one of the main male characters from the heroine’s harem before the ‘real daughter’ of the duke family appears!
Two older brothers who always pick a fight with me on every little thing.
The insane crown prince whose route will always lead to my death.
‘I only see the heroine and no one else’s wizard, and also her loyal slave knight, too!
‘First, let’s take some of them which I see no hope in, out of the list!’
“I didn’t know my place up until now. From now on, I’ll live as quiet as a mouse so you wouldn’t care the slightest bit!
But why do their interests in me keep on rising every time I draw the line?!
The Villainess is a Marionette
Cayena, the Imperial Princess, was known as the most beautiful woman in the Empire. She was a woman who knew nothing but evil and luxury.
However, she was destined for ruin: she would be used as a chess piece by her younger brother to secure his throne and killed by her crazy husband.
“I’ll make you the Emperor.”
“… Sister, are you referring to me?”
“In exchange, give me freedom.”
She had to change things before she became that Cayena.
The Reason Why Raeliana Ended Up At The Duke’S Mansion
Poisoned to death by her own betrothed?! Eunha didn’t wake up in a novel’s story just to get killed off again as an unfortunate extra! To change her story she needs a cover… 6 months pretending to be the fake fiancée of the novel’s male protagonist, Duke Noah Wynknight. But will this cold-hearted, angel-faced demon of a man really help her avoid another ill-fated ending?!
Your Throne / I Want to Be You, Just For A Day
The story follows main characters Medea Solon and Psyche Callista, who become archenemies after competing for the position of crown princess of the Vasilios Empire. On the day of the Yearly Prayer, Medea and Psyche accidentally switch bodies.
The Remarried Empress
Navier was the perfect empress, however, the Emperor wanted a wife, not a colleague. And so, the Emperor abandoned Empress Navier and placed an enslaved girl beside him. That was fine until Navier heard the Emperor promise the slave the Empress’ position. After many ups and downs, Navier decided she would accept being the Queen of the neighbouring country and remarry.
Kill The Villainess
Eris Mizerian was the villainess of a novel. The only daughter of a marquis, she got executed after scheming against the pure and lovely protagonist, Helena. My only goal, after possessing her, is simply to leave this world and go home. I am prepared to face even death, but the laws of this world keep stopping me.
A changed Eris begins to draw the attention of three men who once loathed her; the Crown Prince, the High Priest, and the Knight.
"It doesn't matter. I will never be able to love this world."
Even if the only way out is death,
even if the only way out is make a deal with a witch...
I will absolutely leave this world!
This is the story of the villainess who defies fate, Eris, and her escape from this world!
The Way To Protect The Female Lead's Older Brother
I accidentally took possession of someone in a 19+ reverse harem novel.
The problem is that I became Roxana Agriche, the older sister of the sub-villain. My damn father kidnapped the heroine’s brother. Now, is the only thing left to meet a terrible end from the vengeance of the heroine?
But what if I can avoid that horrible development?
“I’m also interested in this toy.”
“I’ll protect you until you can get out of here safely.”
The heroine’s brother, Cassis Pedalian, will definitely be able to pay me back later.
Shadow Queen
“Can you be my daughter for me?”
By his offer, Elena became Duke of Franceschi’s fake daughter.
She became the queen and gave birth to Crown Prince’s son.
Then suddenly, Princess Veronica who was assumed dead came back.
She was only just a toy.
But eventually, Elena gets her son taken and is murdered.
However, she went back to the past.
“I’ll destroy all of you.”
I’ll never live as a toy again.
Elena decides to seeks revenge.
Under the Oak Tree
The daughter of a duke, the stuttering Maximilian, married a knight of lowly status at her father’s coercion.
After their first night, her husband departed for an expedition without another word.
He comes back three years later, this time as a famous knight in the whole continent.
How would Maximilian face him on his return?
"The more I think of you, the more lonely and lonely I become. I don't know why I can't quit even though it's so painful."
I'm Stanning The Prince
Angela’s fanfic became such a sensation that it even reached the Imperial Family, leading her to get arrested on charges of treason. Nevertheless, her fanfic improved the First Prince’s image, and his sister, the Princess, decides to take political advantage of this and keep Angela by their side. 
The heroine who can now fangirl to her heart’s content, and the Prince who doesn’t know how to act around her. As they bicker back and forth, they start growing closer…
Miss Not-So Sidekick
Hyejung loved to read to escape her daily stress. But that’s before she woke up inside the bizarre world of her favorite novel! Instead of the main heroine who courts three eligible men, she is now Latte Ectrie – a minor villain that everyone hates?! One way or another, it’s a chance to live out her most beloved storyline, with popcorn in hand to watch all the drama! Taking charge of the narrative takes on a whole new meaning!
Even Though I’M The Villainess, I’ll Become The Heroine!
I wasn’t able to overcome the harassment and took my life, but I was reincarnated with the perpetrator? The perpetrator is the heroine, Florre, and I am the villainess, Dahlia, who’s going to die horribly.
“They said you are a villain with neither blood nor tears, but unlike the rumors, you often shed tears.”
“Your Highness must believe all the nonsense the idiots are talking about, huh?”
Grand Duke of Cervian, the half brother of the Male lead and who will be punished for treason afterwards. He approached me. I can’t lose the man who will be my greatest ally.
“Your Highness, would you marry me?”
“Now…… what did you say?”
“And take revenge together.”
A similar situation, a fixed ending. The heroine is not the only one who knows the ending of the novel. I took a long and arduous path of revenge.
Who Made Me A Princess
The beautiful Athanasia was killed at the hands of her own biological father, Claude de Alger Obelia, the cold-blooded emperor! It’s just a silly bedtime story… until one woman wakes up to suddenly find she’s become that unfortunate princess! She needs a plan to survive her doomed fate, and time is running out. Will she go with Plan A, live as quietly as possible without being noticed by the infamous emperor? Plan B, collect enough money to escape the palace? Or will she be stuck with Plan C, sweet-talking her way into her father’s good graces?!
The Villainess Reverses the Hourglass
With the marriage of her prostitute mother to the Count, Aria’s status in society skyrocketed immediately. After leading a life of luxury, Aria unfairly meets death because of her sister Mielle’s schemes. And right before she dies, she sees an hourglass fall as if it were a fantasy. And just like that, she was miraculously brought back to the past.
“I want to become a very elegant person, just like my sister, Mielle.”
In order to face the villainess, she must become an even more wicked villainess. This was the new path Aria chose to take revenge on Mielle who murdered both her and her mother.
The Evil Lady's Hero
Junipe Magnolia, a villainess friend of the heroine in this novel called Rael Cania.
The Junipe inside the novel has always loved the male lead, Iseed. To the point where she harassed Rael out of jealousy because she's loved by Iseed.
And thus, Junipe is destinied to die in the hands of the male lead of this novel.
But one day.
"Why did I become Junipe?!"
But let's think about it, it's still one year away from the time Junipe is going to get killed by Iseed. So, I have to meet Iseed and Rael first, I'll be able to find a way out of my death if I do so.
Yeah, let's meet them first!
But, this man is just so tender-hearted and kind. Would Junipe be able to escape from this man?!
I Tamed a Tyrant and Ran Away
God gave me a chance to relive my life. Before the rebirth, I had been used for the past 400 years as the empire's sword. And so, I swore to destroy the empire. I found the young prince of the country and became his teacher. I taught him how to become a tyrant and asked for the country.
"I will do the lady's will."
He conquered the whole empire for me, and I ran away.
"I came to take you, Charlize Ronan." Dylan became a perfect tyrant and searched the entire empire for me.
"You tamed me, so why did you run away?"
Untouchable Lady
“Please, Hilise. Please die in place of Gabrielle.” My always dignified brother begged me for the first time. He wants me to die for our stepsister, whom we don't even share a drop of blood with. “For the first and last time, I ask you this.” I've always been miserable, and there is no exception this time. The seventh time that I was betrayed and killed, I was completely free of lingering feelings. “I'm glad that you're a scumbag until the end.” I won't be swayed by love anymore. It's my turn to abandon them first.
I’ll Live On As A Villainess
I reincarnated as the villainess in a book!
The one who dared to commit attempted murder on the heroine is the owner of this body?
Let's just live in a quiet place where we have fun and eat! That's what I thought for a while.
It was so, so, so cold here in the north, where I was kicked out as a punishment.
Before I froze to death, I called the Great Demon of Fire and set fire to the fireplace but...
Why isn't he going back? If you've done the job, shouldn't you go back?!
I was flustered to find out that I had signed a life contract with a demon just to start a fire but to think that I'd be responsible for relieving his desires!
The bickering romance between a big puppy demon and a small villainess lady!
It Looks Like I’Ve Fallen Into The World Of A Reverse Harem Game
When I opened my eyes, I was in a different world. I had become the game’s villainous princess who was feared by all. Not to mention… Completely naked men I didn’t even know were approaching me left and right! “Are you cold? Shall I warm you up with a hug?” “Oh? Have you not had enough yet?” Seriously, what’s up with this situation? And just how the hell am I going to get out of this freaking game?!
Father, I Don't Want to Get Married!
I’m Jubelian? The daughter of the duke and the villainess of this novel?
I managed to avoid my death with some previous knowledge about my life, as this was my second time at it. Now, I should be able to live a peaceful life!
“I’m not going to marry a man unless he has everything. I want the most wealthy, famous, and competent man there is.”
I dreamt of a glamorous life as the daughter of the duke, but my father tells me the Crown Prince who is known to be a lunatic is to be my husband! As an extraordinary measure, I couldn’t help but start a contract relationship. That is, with a handsome side character that looks better than the main one.
“Why are you trying to avoid being engaged to the prince?”
“He’s scary. I heard that he even kills his own entourage if he doesn’t like them.”
A few days later, the prince sent a terrible letter to me.
“I will not kill you.”
Oh no, did I set up another death trap for myself?
Like A Wind On A Dry Branch
"Hi, You."
Count Casarius fell victim to a plague and died suddenly, leaving behind a will stating that Rietta, his beautiful young widow of the manor, whom he tried to use as a concubine, be buried alive alongside him. Just before Rietta is buried, Archduke Axias, rumored to be a cruel tyrant, arrives at the funeral to collect the enormous debt Count Casarius still owes him.
“Everyone here seems to feel sorry for her, and I still have a debt to collect from Casarius… If I take her instead of debt, I think all of you here should be happy," he smiled.
"Hello, Temptress."
Everything was a Mistake
Roa Valrose reincarnated as villainess in the book. In order to avoid the fate of being burned at the stake, she approaches the hero, Nocton Edgar.
It hurts every time she gets closer to him. Nevertheless, for her survival, she does everything he wants her to do.
“Come again, Valrose.”
The mysterious Nocton unexpectedly sought her out every day.
Then one day, her friend for 10 years says something unknown to her.
“Actually, I have a dream. The Duke of Edgar is a terrible villain!”
He is not the hero, but the villain?
As soon as she realized that she had misinterpreted the role, she decided to get away from Nocton.
“Let’s not meet anymore.”
But the villain’s reaction was strange.
“Don’t go. You’ve always been special to me.”
She was suspicious of his sudden change of attitude.
Will she able to get rid of Nocton safely?
I Became the Tyrant's Secretary
I became the secretary of a tyrant in place of my clumsy brother to survive.
But I have so much potential for it. I’m so darn good at my job. Because I served the tyrant so well, ‘Everyone has a happy ending’.
Well then, shall I quit being a secretary and live a leisurely life now?
“Rosaline, tell me what you want.” He asked as he stepped down from his chair.
“I want to quit.”
His eyebrows twitched slightly.
“Do you want to die?”
Your highness, you never hold on to people who want to leave, so why’re you being like this to me?
Seduce the Villainess Father
After being in a bus crash, I woke up to the world of my favourite web novel.
Not only that, It was before the protagonists were born, to their parents’ world!
To stop the incoming multiple bad events.
I tried to prevent the kidnapping of the sister who is pregnant with the female lead!
But I got kidnapped instead?!
It's depressing to be kidnapped, but my body couldn't handle the mana and became a sunfish-like state
But... if I am next to the emperor who kidnapped me, my body becomes normal!
Right! The way to save that man from marrying a witch and getting killed by his son, and for someone who is vulnerable to mana such as myself to live, is for us to get married!
The Villains Savior
Set on a path to tragedy and misfortune from a young age, Aseph Randell is doomed to die a villain. That is, until the mysterious Elzay Tiathe appears in his life with a promise: "I can save you." After having vivid visions of him for so long, can Elzay untangle the twisted fate tied to Aseph... or will they both be dragged down together?
Contemporary Manhwa/Manga:
Night Crying Crow
This woman; who is she?
If something was action, it'd be action. If something was romance, it’d be romance. The A-list actor Cheon Woo Kang, who's great at every (genre), had his heart stolen away by an unknown woman who’d broken into his house!
“We'll meet again.~"
Woo Kang contracted an over imaginative illness as he drew the woman, whose name he didn't even know. In front of Woo Kang, she reappeared as the police officer Park Tae... Could the shadow of the crisis that appeared in front of them be a coincidence?
Raise wa Tanin ga Ii
Yoshino Somei would have been a normal high-schooler if not for the fact that she is the granddaughter of the leader of the Osaka-based Somei Group, the Kansai region's largest yakuza organization. One day, Yoshino hurries home after hearing of the news about the unification of Kansai and Kanto's biggest syndicates, the Somei and the Miyama groups. This, according to the article, will result in a marriage of the leaders' grandchildren—one of whom is Yoshino herself! Despite her best efforts to annul the arrangement, Yoshino has to go to Tokyo to visit her fiancé, Kirishima Miyama, who is unexpectedly nice and charming.
During their first meeting, Yoshino is swept up in various events and becomes unable to refuse moving to Tokyo, which is why, half a year later, she now lives with the Miyama group. At school, she soon realizes that Kirishima is very popular, so her relationship with him garners the hate of his fangirls and subsequently results in bullying. To make matters worse, Kirishima could not be further away from her prince charming since he, after all, was born to be a yakuza member.
Raise wa Tanin ga Ii follows Yoshino and her new life in Tokyo that is filled with nothing but troubles connected to the underworld. However, though she wishes to be as far from it as possible, this isn't Yoshino's first time dealing with the world of the Yakuza...
Positively Yours
To Hee-won’s dismay, the BFF she crushed on and her other BFF are now dating! Seriously bummed, Hee-won decides to go wild just one time, and find solace with a handsome stranger. A very satisfying one night affair has now turned into more — she’s pregnant! Fate brings them together again, and now the regimented Doo-joon is determined to do the right thing and marry her. But they’re basically strangers! Except... their bodies have been very intimately acquainted. What’s this mother-to-be to do?
True Beauty
After binge-watching beauty videos online, a shy comic book fan masters the art of makeup and sees her social standing skyrocket as she becomes her school’s prettiest pretty girl overnight. But will her elite status be short-lived? How long can she keep her real self a secret? And what about that cute boy who knows her secret?
Cheese In the Trap
Hong Sul is a ordinary college student. Yoo Jung is the school's most popular upperclass man. He's good looking, rich, smart, and even nice. However, Hong Sul thinks there's more to Yoo Jung than what meets the eye…
SPY x FAMILY
The master spy codenamed has spent his days on undercover missions, all for the dream of a better world. But one day, he receives a particularly difficult new order from command. For his mission, he must form a temporary family and start a new life?! A Spy/Action/Comedy about a one-of-a-kind family!
Doppio Senso (18+)
“What are you thinking about?”
“I’m thinking about a guy.”
KyungHyun stopped in the middle of a deep kiss and sighed. His lips began to form a smile, but his fierce glare said otherwise. Possessiveness and jealousy spread across his sculpted face.
“Will you tell me his name?”
His easygoing and languid voice reached her ears.
“Why?”
“So that I can shoot him down.”
317 notes · View notes
sohin-ace · 3 years
Text
Jotaro - Kakyoin's Notebook
I'm sorry, I clickbaited y'all. The pairing in this story is not official.
...unless?
As you were all about to check out of the hotel, You decided to go back to everyone's respective rooms to make sure none of you forgot anything.
The crusaders were downstairs and you came up, checking every room. Everything seemed okay, you only needed to check Kakyoin and Jotaro's room last and then go back down.
You entered their room and looked everywhere. You stumbled onto a little notebook that was halfway underneath one of the pillows right as you were about to leave.
"Huh? Oops, I nearly didn't see that!" You bent down and took the notebook in your hands. It was just about pocket-sized. "Oh I do remember Jotaro having something like that, better get it back to him!"
Out of fateful clumsiness, the notebook slipped out of your hands and fell on the ground, opening on a random page. You crouched to pick it up, but then, your gaze fell upon what was on the page.
Your breath hitched in speechless confusion at what you saw, written at the top, in big font.
'Y/NxJotaro'
Why was your name and Jotaro's on that page? Was that some kind of memo? You knew Jotaro had the habit of taking notes to remember things, but why was your name in there?
Your curiosity got the best of you and you continued to look down the page, swiping through the others. You knew it was terribly wrong and you were invading his privacy but you were just so lost. It concerned you, there was your name on it.
" 'One-shot Draft... WIP', What does that even mean? J-... Jotaro did this?" You mumbled out loud, face scrunching up in confusion and slight fear as you looked through words you couldn't understand.
" 'Soulmate AU', 'Drabble', 'NSFW'? Are those some kind of codes?"
Pages long of stories decorated the sheets, so many you couldn't read everything. There were even some sketches and drawings that you didn't have the heart to look at. You managed to read some pieces of stories that left you even more confused. You read to yourself.
' "W-wait!" Y/N said as tears prickled in her eyes, her face flushed with innocent shyness. "I-It's my first time..."
"Don't worry," Jotaro spoke, hovering above her, his voice deep and soothing. "I'll be gentle." '
...What? You don't remember ever saying anything of the sort? You couldn't comprehend what you were reading. Whatever was written in there never happened and was fictional or somesuch to you.
When it was just too much for you to handle, you closed the notebook, your face still strained with mixed feelings.
Only then did you notice that there was a cherry sticker on the back of the notebook. After looking at the first page, you saw the name of the owner.
Noriaki Kakyoin.
"K-kakyo-... Oh my gosh..."
You were shocked, but somehow relieved. It made more sense than the author being Jotaro, but it still blew you away, the fact that Kakyoin would write such things on your and Jotaro's behalf.
Suddenly, Polnareff walked by and noticed you through the open door. You flinched when he called out to you and entered the room.
"Ah there you are Y/N! We started to worry!" He approached you and he noticed what you were holding. "Oh that's Kakyoin's notebook! He can't live without it, good thing you found it! Okay, let's go now, the others are waiting. Allez, on y va!"
He guided you out of the room and you followed, clutching the notebook. Polnareff didn't have to know the weird things written on it about you and Jotaro. You had to discover what it all meant.
"That's bullshit. You don't make any sense, Y/N." Jotaro scoffed at you, a few hours after the little hotel room occurence.
"I swear on my future husband's life! I'll prove it to you, look." You turned around and looked for your red haired friend. "Kakyoin! Can I doodle something on your notebook please~?"
"Huh?" He looked at you questioningly. "Why all of a sudden?"
"Well, Mr. Joestar will take a while to come back, so might as well kill some time. I'll write a cute message for you to read on the last train home!"
The red head smiled at your goofiness and thought 'why not?'. He took out his notebook along with a pen, but instead of giving it to you, he opened it on a specific empty page.
"Here," He handed you the items. "Only draw on this page. Don't draw on the other pages."
You nodded. "Got it! Thank you Kakyoin~!"
You smiled innocently and as soon as the male turned his back to you, your expression turned dark and you instantly looked for Jotaro who was sitting nearby.
"Jojo! Here, I have it, let's do this!" You stood in front of him with the notebook in your hands and he sighed.
"Yare yare daze, I'm not betraying his trust because of your shadiness."
"It's not like that! There's-..." You cut yourself off to look behind you and check if Kakyoin was looking.
You leaned down, inching towards Jotaro's face and whispered quietly. "There are things about us in here. Last time I saw it on accident, but if Kakyoin writes stuff about us, it's our legitimate right to know!"
"Says who? Are you a lawyer or something?"
"Jojo please!!" You pleaded while gripping on the collar of his gakuran, moving the chains on it and making them clang loudly.
The sudden noise alerted the cherry-haired fellow who turned his head to look at you both from afar. His eyes instantly widened and sparkled with vicious yet happy stars.
He loved to see his two best friends interract and, he knew damn well he took half of your interractions out of context, but that's what made them so good. His imagination started running wild at the scene before him.
The way you desperately held onto Jotaro, your faces, so close to each other, your begging eyes looking at him, yearning for his lips, waiting for one thing only.
'Jojo, please!' Kakyoin muttered what he imagined you would say. 'Say yes... I've been dying to kiss you!'
Back to you two, Jotaro clicked his tongue and looked away, closing his eyes in frustration. He hated the fact that he just couldn't refuse you anything.
"Tch! You're so fucking annoying. Fine, I get it, give it to me." Jotaro grumbled and moved your hands away from him, snatching the notebook from your hand.
'Tch! You know I can't resist you. Fine, don't beg for me to stop when I start messing you up.' Kakyoin continued, imitating his friend's deep voice under his breath and being surprisingly in character, for the inappropriate things he was imagining.
Kakyoin tensed up with anticipation when Jotaro suddenly grabbed your wrists, his big strong hands overpowering your fragile ones easily. You may have made the first move, but he would take the lead.
If it wasn't for the public surrounding you, Kakyoin was sure his friend would have gotten up and slammed you against the wall, pinning your hands at your side while you whimpered his name cutely. But he had to hold back, at least for now, or so Kakyoin daydreamed.
"Hey Kakyoin, what're you looking at? Come here for a bit!"
Before Kakyoin could even see the rest of the scene, which happened to be the most interesting part, he was interrupted by Polnareff who was in dire need for help with a nearby vending machine that seemed to have eaten his money.
Kakyoin sighed a bit annoyed, but joined his French comrade, not even glancing back at you. He'd have to remember to write everything down as soon as you gave him back his notebook.
Kakyoin Noriaki was an average boy that loved action and adventures, but he secretely wasn't immune to a good sweet romance story.
When you joined the crusaders, your interactions with Jotaro seemed as platonic as with the rest of the men. But for some reason, the boy started to feel some kind of connection between you two.
He didn't know when or how it started, but he felt like something was different at a certain point.
Why was it so cute when, one day, you removed Jotaro's hat to fix the pins that were moved out of place after a fight, and he let you put it back on him, even though he never lets anybody touch it?
Or maybe it was that other time in a restaurant where, after Jotaro eyed your dessert for a while, you exchanged your cakes to let him have a taste, stealing a bite from his own in the process.
Or that day when you struggled put your earrings back on and he had to help you out, only to struggle even more, his fingers too big and clumsy to be accurate. He had to call out Star Platinum to do it while he held your hair out of the way.
Even the simplest of gestures seemed romantic and adorable to him. He was sure something was going on between you two, and yet, you were too dense to realize it. All of this fueled his inner fanboy and it prevented him from sleeping at night.
He shipped you two so goddamn much.
He was guilty, but he loved every single bit of it. Of course, no one could know. If someone knew, especially you two, that'd be the end of him.
You were all waiting for the next train to arrive, which was a big 40 minutes. Joseph and Abdul went to buy something to snack on while you waited and Polnareff went to the restroom.
Kakyoin was sitting next to you, his back resting against the wall and his eyes were closed. As you thought he had fallen asleep, you took this moment to turn the other way to talk to your nonchalant friend.
"You see?" You spoke softly, careful to not wake Kakyoin up. "I told you there were stuff about us in that notebook!"
"Shut up, there were only messages on that page, I'm sure the others were the same." He grumbled with the same low intensity as you. "And you know damn well he can be a weirdo sometimes."
"But still, I want to understand... And also, what does 'smut' even mean?"
He pretended to be asleep, but his mind was racing.
Kakyoin who wasn't quite sleeping and very much listening to whatever he could hear through the background noise of the station, flinched and started blushing.
Just, when and where did you heard that term?
" 'Smut'?" Jotaro looked at you with confused furrowed eyebrows. "Hell if I know. You speak better english than I do, shouldn't you know?"
"Well I..."
Before the conversation could go down even further, Kakyoin feigned waking up and got up from his slouched position.
You noticed and turned around, staring at him, scared that he would ask what you were talking about, as you didn't want to confront him about the weird things you saw in his notes. If he ever knew, he would finish you. But something worse happened.
Jotaro nudged you and tilted his head towards Kakyoin, but you quite didn't get the message.
"Oi Kakyoin, do you know what 'smut' means? You know a lot of languages, right?" Jotaro asked like it was nothing and you gasped, secretly wanting to slap Jotaro for his indiscretion.
Kakyoin looked over at him, unfazed as ever. "Smut? Hmmm I guess I can look it up later. Where did you hear that?"
Jotaro innocently signed your death warrant. "Y/N just told me."
"JOTARO!!!" You shot up from your seat and stared at him in pure disbelief and betrayal. "OH MY- ARE YOU SERIOUS?! YOU TRAITOR!!!"
"Oh really?" Kakyoin teased, sending you a knowing look. "What's going on with you two? Are you keeping secrets from me?"
You blushed and flinched as Kakyoin's amethyst eyes stared through your soul. Before Jotaro could say anything else, you slapped a hand over his big mouth and Kakyoin's eye glinted.
"I-I mean... No! Wait. There's something I need to tell Jojo, excuse us for a sec."
You then leaned in and cupped Jotaro's ear as you whispered. Kakyoin looked at you in pure satisfaction, trying his best to not start smiling and giggling like a goofy schoolgirl.
Oh no, he didn't need to hear the sweet nothings you were deliciously breathing on Jotaro's now tingling skin. Imagining it was more than enough.
You leaned back and softly spoke to him. "Don't ruin this for us. I'm trusting you."
"Yare Yare daze. You put me into this in the first place. Don't complain."
Kakyoin's eyes widened and he turned his head around, trying to hide his expression and pretended he totally didn't hear that. Oh how sweet the lack of context was for his little fanboy mind. He wouldn't ask too many questions since you were offering him such a good show.
On the train, you waited until Kakyoin was completely out and asleep to subdue his notebook. That would make a good reading on the 4 hours long travel.
"Yes that's it! Right on the left pocket, yeah that one!"
You guided Jotaro who was hiding not too far from Kakyoin's seat as your delinquent friend used Star Platinum to steal your cherry loving friend's notebook.
When he finally had it, Star Platinum brought it back and both you and Jotaro proceeded to read through the many drafts and stories about you two.
Getting ready for one hell of a joy ride.
Bonus:
Kakyoin stretched and took a deep breath of fresh air as he got off the train.
"Aah~! I slept like a log. Huh? What's wrong, why are you two so red? Did you get motion sick, maybe?"
Kakyoin commented upon seeing your and Jotaro's flushed face as you got off. Your shoulders were slumped in shame and Jotaro was hiding behind his hat like a wanted criminal.
"Uh yeah... Here Kakyoin, you dropped this..." you groaned and handed him his notebook.
He thanked you and took his due. When he was gone, you glanced at Jotaro and you both shared intense empathy and regret.
Don't steal Kakyoin's notebook.
Oh man, wouldn't it be fun and also a bit sad if after Dio was defeated, Y/N and Jotaro became a couple?
You walked by the river, holding hands with Jotaro after a long week of finals. You suddenly stopped in your tracks and looked at the water reflecting the orange sunset.
Jotaro looked at you confused, but followed your gaze, until both of you laid eyes on a young girl painting the scenery on a canvas.
"You know... He would have loved this..." You started softly, a melancholic look cast on the girl as her Stand posed on the grass like a model, thinking herself only could see it. "To see us together, I mean..."
Jotaro inspected the girl, her red curls and green uniform moving messily in the wind. "Did he ever write something about us watching him paint?"
You chuckled sadly. "Why didn't he think of that? His stories were great, but he was in none of them..."
Jotaro noticed you biting your lip as your voice wavered slightly and he squeezed your hand in reassurance. You laid your head on his arm and he responded by bringing you closer to him.
"But now he is."
OKAY AUTHOR OUT
88 notes · View notes
sanjisock · 3 years
Text
more than words
50 words; 50 sentences
ao3
#01 - Motion
A spinning kick, a swing of blade — the two meet and hit but don’t hurt, and Nami sighs exasperatedly at such a pathetic display of a mating dance.
#02 - Cool
Zoro stands his ground as his enemy — finally, finally — falls unceremoniously on his back, unconscious, and Sanji thinks for a moment that the sight of Zoro — wild and victorious and ready to take on the world — looks kind of, maybe, slightly cool.
  #03 - Young
Brook sees the two — dying to die for each other, the weight of their friends’ lives pulling down their shoulders — and he thinks too many people forget how young they still are.
  #04 - Last
The Cook is the last person Zoro would consider lending a hand in a fight — “who would want to work together with that dumbass anyway,” he lies whenever anyone asks, and doesn’t admit that it’s because he trusts Sanji’s ability to stand his ground, wholly and fully.
  #05 - Wrong
Sanji knows Zoro, like him, understands better than most — that this nakama thing isn’t just something you’d die for, but something you’d kill for, too.
  #06 - Gentle
Sanji manages to catch Kitetsu before it rolls off from the deck during a storm, and in that moment, Zoro knows, from the reverent way he regards the swords in his hands, that this isn’t the first time the Cook has wielded one.
  #07 - One
“Calm down, Marimo,” Sanji says with a dismissive wave of his hand when Zoro asks about the sword a few days later, “I’m not about to take your place as the ship’s swordsman; a cook doesn’t use his hands to fight, and I had a terrible teacher anyways.”
  #08 - Thousand
“I’m worth two thousand men,” Zoro grumpily says, almost sulking, and Nami can’t resist patting his head like she would to a little boy pulling the pigtail of a girl he has a crush on.
  #09 - King
You’re like the prince of Dumbass Kingdom, Zoro says, and it takes Sanji everything in him not to blurt out, Dumbass Kingdom sounds about right; wait ‘till you see the fucking king.
  #10 - Learn
Watching Sanji converse fluently with a couple of tourists in a Northern language, Zoro wonders when he will ever stop learning something new about Sanji — or if he ever will, at all.
  #11 - Blur
When Zoro finally comes to, the wounds from Bartholomeow Kuma is muted by Chopper’s medicine, a dull throb at the back of his consciousness; but the sharp pain against his heart feels raw still, visceral and razor-sharp, tucked alongside the ache of Sanji’s sacrifice.
#12 - Wait
“Wait,” he manages to croak out before Sanji flees the room, the word spilling out unbidden; he isn’t quite sure why, but he knows that he wants the Cook to stay.
  #13 - Change
“Have some fucking decency ,” Sanji yells, throwing a shirt at Zoro’s direction; the brute has been walking around the ship bare-chested like an eyesore ever since they entered the summer island, and Sanji is just trying to do everyone a favor — and definitely not because there’s a different kind of heat pooling at the pit of his stomach.
#14 - Command
Robin watches the two in amusement — Zoro could have easily refused to be Sanji’s pack mule, and she can hear him grumbling about it still; and yet, here they are, once again, together at the island’s marketplace.
#15 - Hold
Sanji is rough around the edges, bristling at the slightest touch; Zoro knows he needs to be gentle, but he doesn’t quite remember the last time he held something that isn’t a hilt of a sword, without meaning to hurt . It’s a learning curve. 
  #16 - Need
Sanji knows Zoro is a dumbass, but it takes a special kind of stupid to think he would never be good enough for Sanji, when he’s all that Sanji has ever needed.
#17 - Vision
Zoro never regrets losing his eye, but he wishes, sometimes, he could still take in the sight of Sanji with an unimpaired vision, just to see more of him.
  #18 - Attention
“You’re starting a fight, Marimo?” Sanji growls, voice low and dangerous, and Zoro thinks, yes, yes, anything to get you to look at me.
  #19 - Soul
He loves the kid like a brother, but sometimes Zoro hates how Luffy can easily see past his gruff words and feigned ignorance; the way Luffy only needs to take one look at him to guess, “you’re worried about Sanji, aren’t you?”
  #20 - Picture
He carries around everyone’s bounty posters, Sanji tells himself, and tries not to think too hard about how the only one he kept in his breast pocket is Zoro’s, folded neatly against his heart.
  #21 - Fool
“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done so far,” Sanji says when they part, lips still tingling from their earlier kiss, because Zoro’s love is fierce and consuming and Sanji knows, ever since he was just a kid with the iron mask, that he doesn’t deserve any of this.
  #22 - Mad
“Don’t you ever say that kind of shit again,” Zoro snarls, slamming the wall beside Sanji’s head, his voice trembling with a kind of anger Sanji has never seen him with before — frustrated, desperate. “You’re important to me, Cook.” 
  #23 - Child
Grow up and cast your dreams away, Sanji tells himself every day, the voice ringing in his ears; you stopped being a child deserving of a dream the moment you chained Zeff down to the ground.
  #24 - Now
Grow up and cast your dreams away, Sanji wants to tell himself, but the voice stutters, drowned out by the sight of the kid bleeding on the deck of Baratie — he’s a swordsman, too, acknowledged by none other than Dracule Mihawk himself — but a kid still, throwing himself headfirst towards the case of his dreams, steps unweighted by regrets.
  #25 - Shadow
Zoro doesn’t know which is worse — Sanji, forever running away from the shadow his brothers cast; or Zoro, chasing after someone who is no longer around to leave behind a shadow anymore.
  #26 - Goodbye
After Whole Cake Island, there’s a period of time where Zoro would follow Sanji around the ship like a lost puppy, unwilling to let the Cook out of his sight; Usopp definitely didn’t expect Zoro to have such a cute side, and crouches over his new invention to hide his smile.
  #27 - Hide
“We’re not doing that here,” Sanji hisses, and forces himself not to laugh at the pout on Zoro’s face; the galley might be secluded enough, but they’re still on the enemy ship’s galley.
  #28 - Fortune
It is annoying, the way Sanji keeps reminding Zoro that he could have collected Mihawk’s bounty and lived the rest of his life in wealth; especially when Zoro would trade any riches in the world just to stay by the Cook’s side.
  #29 - Safe
It catches Zoro off guard when Sanji starts talking about his mother; it’s a short anecdote, a single happy memory, but Zoro can tell by the way Sanji tells it — guarded and hesitant, like he wants to keep the words close and safe — that he has never shared it with anyone else before.
  #30 - Ghost
Usopp starts shaking like a leaf as soon as they enter the abandoned, dilapidated house, and Sanji gently tells him, sometimes the worst ghost is the one you create yourself; Zoro feels the weight of Wado on his hip, and agrees.
  #31 - Book
“I don’t need this,” Zoro grumbles with a blush, pushing the book back into Nami’s hands, trying hard to ignore Nami’s laughter and the words ROMANCE FOR DUMMIES emblazoned on the book’s jacket.
  #32 - Eye
Shusui sinks into the man’s stomach, all the way to the hilt, and Zoro thinks of the way Sanji curled into himself as the man landed a lucky hit on the cook’s hand. An eye for an eye.
  #33 - Never
“This is my first time,” Zoro whispers, head ducking away as he feels his face flush at the admission; but Sanji’s hand rests on his cheek, encouraging, and he can feel the curve of Sanji’s smile as their lips meet and Sanji replies, “it’s mine, too.”
  #34 - Sing
Luffy cheers when Zoro and Sanji comes into view, and he lets them take on the next batch of enemies; a good fight is always fun, but watching Zoro and Sanji fight is even more so — like watching a dance that only those two know the melody to.
  #35 - Sudden
“What, are we supposed to be surprised?” Nami says, barely looking up from the map she’s working on; Sanji sputters, face redder than the tomatoes he served during breakfast, and Nami feels almost bad for him.
  #36 - Stop
“But we — Zoro and I — how did you know?” Sanji asks, and promptly stops asking questions when he realizes the rest of the crew aren’t surprised either; who could blame them, when his and Zoro’s sexual tension can be seen from a mile away.
  #37 - Time
Sanji knows they have to break apart soon, just to breathe, but right now all he cares about is to taste as much of Zoro as possible — he has waited two years for this, and it has been two years too long.
  #38 - Wash
They have their fair share of fighting — and how, considering the amount of repairs Usopp has to do for Merry just from their petty fights alone — but what the crew doesn’t know is that they also have this thing, this quiet thing, just him and the Cook and a stack of dirty plates between them.
  #39 - Torn
“In retrospect,” Robin observes, “dressing up our dear cook in a maid uniform would not only lower the enemy’s firepower, but also ours, considering how distracted our swordsman has clearly become.”
  #40 - History
“Why do you keep him around, mister?” The kid asks, pointing at the old swordsman with three swords and an eye scar by the peer; Sanji laughs, pats the kid on the head, and says, almost wistfully — “you can say we have some history.”
  #41 - Power
Sanji tugs at Zoro’s sleeve, and Zoro follows suit despite his complaints — Sanji thinks, distantly, how much of an honor it is, to have so much control over such a powerful man.
  #42 - Bother
“I didn’t have enough time to make this three-tier ice cream cake for our lovely Nami-san and Robin-chan because you distracted me!” Sanji says with a hard jab of a finger against Zoro’s chest, and Zoro thinks, good .
  #43 - God
Zoro does not believe in gods, but there’s a hymn of a noise when Zoro presses his lips against the crook of Sanji’s neck, the hallelujah of the world breaking apart as their bodies move together, and he thinks, close enough .
  #44 - Wall
 Zoro slams his fist into the wall of Polar Tang, and is taken aback by the depth of his own frustration; he knows Luffy and the others will get Sanji back from Big Mom’s place, but it unsettles him still, the way Sanji hides himself under layers of pretenses when Zoro has bared so much of himself to the Cook in return.
  #45 - Naked
“What the fuck was that for , Mosshead?!” Sanji shrieks, justifiably furious, leg raised and on fire after Zoro sliced his tray into two without preamble; Zoro can’t exactly tell the Cook he did it because he was too surprised at the sight of Sanji in a swimming trunk and nothing else.
  #46 - Drive
Why Zoro , people sometimes ask, but the answer is easy to Sanji — nobody drives him crazy the way Zoro does, and is that not what true love feels like?
  #47 - Harm
Zoro knows Sanji will be furious ; but as he faces Kuma, knowing at least the Cook is out of harm’s way, he knows he would do this a hundred times over, a thousand times over, a million times over.
  #48 - Precious
Sanji is sitting by the corner of the infirmary, face pale with red-rimmed eyes, and Zoro thinks he’s never had that, before — people who would weep for him, knowing that he is more than dried scars and calloused skin.
  #49 - Hunger
This thing we have is dangerous, Sanji tells him, but Zoro doesn’t care — he already has a craving, the same way he needs a booze when it’s been too long, except he thinks that this vice will surely kill him.
  #50 - Believe
This isn’t faith; this is the truth, Zoro’s truth, the same way he knows he will become the Greatest — Sanji will find that elusive sea of his, and Zoro will stay with him until it is the last thing he can do.
51 notes · View notes
bowlegsandbiceps · 2 years
Text
Suptober Day 4: Secret
Secret Agent Man
Mature / Secret Agent!Cas/Domestic Dean / Destiel / 2,726 words
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Suptober Masterlist (A03)
Castiel’s heart hammered in his chest as he rolled to a stop on a nondescript residential street and killed the headlights. The entire mission was FUBAR, was from the start in all honesty but he never dreamed it would end up like this. He rubbed a hand over his mouth hard, glancing up at the small sliver of moon in the sky, and ran the call through his head again.
“Speak”
“C-C-Cas?” He remembered how every muscle had seized at the sound of Dean’s voice, tremulous and staticky on the other end of the line. He’d looked down at his phone, confirming that, no, he hadn’t accidentally brought his personal phone on a job. Dean was on the opposite end of a burner with only one contact and that could only mean one thing.
“Hello, darling.”
“Crowley.” Castiel had done his level best to keep his voice even and calm, no hint of the rage and turmoil roiling in his gut.
“Let’s not dally. You have something of mine. I have something of yours.”
“You’re suggesting a trade.”
“An even trade.” Crowley had emphasized. “I get the weapon, the money, a plane on the tarmac and a twenty-four-hour head start.”
“Is that all?” Castiel had been sarcastic, a knee-jerk response from years of having nothing to lose, and regretted it instantly.
“Buddy boy that’s generous considering what I could do to your young lad here. He’s a pretty one, Angel. Has a lot of fight in him too.” Castiel heard Crowley sniff and he hoped that Dean had broken his fucking nose. “One hour, Angel. Or the body you’ll be collecting will be his.”
Castiel lowered his head, hands still gripping the steering wheel tight as moments with Dean flashed through his mind. The night they met, him working security at an event Dean was catering and Dean permitting him to stop whatever threats emerged as long as Castiel stayed out of his way and didn’t touch his knives. Dean’s husky baritone as he sang “Secret Agent Man” at him from several yards away when they ran into each other at a festival a few days later, Dean tipsy enough to force Castiel to take his number and Castiel smitten enough to accept it, against his better judgment. The night Dean cooked for him and Castiel thanked him by carrying him off into the bedroom like they were in some romance novel, Dean’s ankles locked at Castiel’s lower back as he kissed the life out of him.
Castiel shook his head, cursed under his breath. He knew better than to form personal connections, but Dean with his mega-watt smile and terrible jokes had wormed his way past all Castiel’s defenses one home-cooked meal at a time until Castiel got sloppy. Now Dean would pay the price for Castiel’s foolishness, a burden Castiel didn’t think he’d be able to bear if he were to fail tonight. 
So he forced himself to harden, feeling his insides solidify to stone and when he climbed out of the car he wasn’t Castiel, certainly wasn’t the man Dean called Cas in the tender moments they shared wrapped up in Dean’s sheets. He was the Angel of Death and he would neutralize this threat. 
Silent as the grave, Castiel made his way up the street, staying in the shadows. When he reached Dean’s driveway he saw the Impala through the open garage door and slipped in next to it. The door was unlocked, a habit Dean had to break goddammit and Castiel slipped inside. He paused in the dark laundry room, startled for a moment to see Dean standing at the stove in his underwear, humming a Metallica song as he sautéed something in a pan. Dean seemed to catch movement out of the corner of his eye and when he turned to look Castiel could see the wound at his temple, blood tacky down the side of his face. 
Castiel immediately lifted his finger to his lips but Dean just blinked at him and looked back down into the pan.
“Is that you, Angel?” Crowley’s voice crooned from somewhere past the doorway and Dean’s shoulders tensed, his spatula pausing. “Don’t burn the veggies, Dean. You don’t want to have to start over again.” Dean immediately lifted the pan and shook it, tossing the chopped peppers, onions and bits of ham with practiced ease. 
Castiel strode forward, not bothering to silence his steps this time and he couldn’t stop himself from touching Dean’s shoulder as he passed though he didn’t look at him. Crowley was sitting at the small kitchen table, dressed sharply in a black suit with a blood-red tie. His nose was crooked and there was blood in his mustache and beard, something that caused Castiel’s lips to quirk in satisfaction though the gun casually pointed at Dean’s back soured his stomach. The table was set for three and Castiel glanced over his shoulder to see that Dean was now transferring the veggies onto a paper towel then began to crack eggs in a shallow bowl.
“You’re just in time for breakfast!” Crowley crooned, gesturing with the gun for Castiel to sit.
Castiel did so silently, taking the seat across from Crowley and directly behind Dean. Crowley adjusted his aim accordingly. 
“So, rough night?” Crowley teased and Castiel merely stared back. 
He could feel Dean moving behind him, his bare feet tapping against the linoleum as he turned to shuffle over to them. Dean, pan in hand and spatula poised stood over Crowley, face blank as he slid the completed omelet onto Crowley’s plate and made to turn to go back to the stove. Crowley’s hand shot out, gripping Dean’s wrist and Dean froze as Castiel snatched up a fork, stretching over the table, and pressed it to Crowley’s jugular. The gun in Crowley’s other hand went snuggly against Dean’s lower back, just above the band of his boxers.
“Easy, Angel. Easy now. I’m sure you wouldn’t want your lover here to lose all feeling below the waist.” Castiel’s eyes flicked to Dean’s face and found his eyes closed, face shuttered in forced calm. Castiel slowly lowered the fork and edged back into his seat. “That’s it. Now, Dean, be a dear and bring me the salt.”
“Taste it first,” Dean said over his shoulder and Castiel glared up at him. Dean shrugged his shoulders giving him a come on expression and Castiel was going to absolutely lose it if Dean’s irrational hatred of people seasoning their food before they tasted it was what actually got him killed.
Crowley laughed lowly, giving a tilt of his head as he used his fork to dig into the omelet. Steam billowed out, the scent of cheese and vegetables strong as Crowley forked a piece into his mouth. He rested his hands against the table’s edge as he chewed and gave another tilt of his head.
“You’re right. It’s perfect. Thank you, Dean.” Dean made to walk back to the stove but Crowley’s grip tightened, the gun pressing harder into his lower back. “Manners, lad.”
“You’re welcome,” Dean gritted out and Crowley finally released him, Castiel watching him pass and had to settle himself at the sight of the red mark left by the gun barrel at the base of Dean’s spine.
Crowley grinned at Castiel. “Nice little set up you got here. Stupid. But nice.”
“I don’t have the weapon.”
Crowley lifted a finger. “Ah but you have the location of the weapon. And what protections have gone into keeping nasty men like me from getting to it.”
“I was on the extraction team. You know very well that extraction and security don’t have anything to do with each other once the handoff is made.”
Crowley gave him a tart smile. “I also know very well that they trust you to handle both. Again…” Crowley’s eyes lifted over his shoulder but Castiel kept his gaze on Crowley, feeling Dean move around him to slide an omelet onto his plate. “Stupid.” The whisper of Dean’s fingers on his shoulder made every muscle in his body tense and Dean immediately pulled away.
“I don’t have the location of the weapon. I only have the drop-off location.”
Crowley pressed his lips together, displeased. “You also have the activation codes.”
Castiel hesitated, listening to the sizzle of eggs in the pan. “I have the self-destruct codes.”
Crowley grinned cheerfully, digging into his omelet. “Good enough for me.” Crowley’s eyes moved to Dean again and Castiel fought the urge to snap his fingers to regain Crowley’s attention. He didn’t have to. Crowley looked at him again, then gestured at his plate. “Eat!”
Castiel dutifully picked up his fork and speared into the omelet, shoving a bite into his mouth that took all the skin off the roof of his mouth. He chewed anyway. Dean was making his way back over, sliding his own omelet onto the final plate before turning to place the pan back on the stove. He hesitated there for a moment.
“Sit down, Dean we don’t want your breakfast getting cold.”
“It’s a little early for me.” Dean’s voice was controlled and even as he spoke to the stove. 
Crowley rolled his eyes and cocked his gun. Dean’s shoulders tensed. “Get your pretty little ass over here and eat your breakfast, Dean Winchester. Or I’ll put a bullet in your boyfriend’s kneecap.”
Dean turned abruptly, hurrying to sit in the chair between the two men. He grabbed his fork and immediately sawed off a bite and shoved it in his mouth, chewing diligently. Crowley watched him as he opened his mouth to allow steam to exit, continuing to chew laboriously until he swallowed. Crowley grinned. 
“He really is darling, Castiel.” Crowley’s eyes were roving over his face as Dean kept his eyes on his plate, cutting off another piece to shove into his mouth. “Didn’t give anything away and I put him through the wringer a bit there.” Crowley used the gun to indicate the hit to Dean’s head.
“Looks to me like he put you through it,” Castiel commented as he speared another piece of omelet contemplating it. “Must be humiliating to have your nose broken by a civilian.” Castiel ate it.
“Not nearly as humiliating as stripping him down so I could really appreciate him before he started cooking.”
Castiel stilled. Dean normally slept in his underwear. Castiel had figured that Crowley had gotten him out of bed at this late hour but then he remembered Dean had an event tonight. Castiel glanced at Dean, sucking in a deep breath, and over the smell of breakfast, he caught a whiff of Dean’s body wash, noted his hair was a little darker than normal, just the slightest bit damp. Dean’s eyes were closed, his jaw set as he held his fork in his fist and Castiel saw red.
Swift as a viper Castiel’s hand shot out, the fork sinking into the tendons of Crowley’s wrist, the same one holding the gun, as Castiel’s other hand went over the barrel, stopping the slide when Crowley attempted to pull the trigger. Dean had flung himself backward, chair skidding against the linoleum until he crashed back into the cabinets. One quick jab to the face, groaning through the pain of a fork stabbing into his chest just over his heart, Castiel managed to twist the gun in Crowley’s hand, his fingers limp from the damaged tendons, and without another thought, Castiel put a bullet in his brain and three more in the center of his chest. 
Castiel was breathing hard, adrenaline scalding through his veins as he stared at the lifeless body sprawled back in the chair, brain matter and bits of skull spraying the wall behind him. His heart began to slow. The threat had been neutralized. 
“Jesus fucking Christ.”
Castiel’s head whipped to the side, finding Dean still sitting, wide eyes filling with tears as his hands gripped the side of his chair frozen. Castiel hit his knees immediately, moving to tuck the gun into his belt behind his back before he cupped Dean’s face gingerly. Dean was shaking all over, teeth chattering and Castiel immediately shrugged out of his trench, a motion that sent pain shooting across his chest. He cursed, looking down and finding the fork still stuck in the meat of his pectoral muscle. He ripped it out, angrily tossing it aside before looking back at Dean just in time to see a single tear slip over his lashes and down his cheek. 
Castiel gathered up the coat and threw it around Dean’s semi-naked form, pulling him off the chair and into his arms. Dean went willingly, his arms going around Castiel’s neck as he planted a knee on either side of Cas’ perching in his lap. Castiel ran one large hand up and down Dean’s back, shushing him as he trembled and cried quietly into Castiel’s neck, his other hand delving back into Dean’s hair. Castiel sucked in a deep breath that was all Dean, shampoo and body wash, and the unique scent of his skin. Castiel huffed it out in a sigh, hands going to Dean’s biceps to push him back so he could see his face.
“Dean.” Castiel held his face in his hands and Dean sniffled, shaking hands coming up to clutch at Castiel’s wrists. “Dean, I need you to be honest with me. Did he hurt you?”Dean shook his head, sniffling again. “Did he touch you at all?”
Dean shook his head again, swallowing hard. “N-no. He just watched me shower. The creep.” Dean let out a breath of a chuckle before he shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut and tears cascaded down his face. Castiel snatched him close and Dean held on for dear life. “C-Cas?”
“Yes, Dean.”
“You killed a guy in my kitchen.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
“You really weren’t kidding when you said your job was dangerous.” Castiel grumbled, holding him tighter and Dean pressed his face to Castiel’s neck. “Is it weird I wanna know how your omelet was?”
Castiel couldn’t help it, he laughed, pressing a kiss to Dean’s uninjured temple and Dean gave a watery laugh of his own. 
“It could’ve used some salt.”
“Oh fuck you. Salt. Jesus.”
“Dean I’m-“
“Don’t.” Dean pulled back, reaching up to wipe at his face. “I’ve seen this part of this movie a thousand times. You’re gonna say you’re sorry because we can’t be together it’s too dangerous, blah blah.”
“Actually that’s not what I was going to say.”
Dean’s brow crinkled. “No?”
Castiel shook his head. “I was going to say I’m sorry you probably won’t get your deposit back.” Dean glanced over at the carnage behind the dead body sitting at his kitchen table. Castiel cocked his head to the side. “You’re taking this remarkably well.”
“I’m pretty sure I’m in shock.” Dean gave a sharp shake of his head as he tore his eyes away from the body and gave a shiver. “Do you need to like… call this in or… You’re hurt!” Dean’s hand immediately went to Castiel’s chest which was bleeding sluggishly. 
“I’m fine. Nothing a bandage and a tetanus shot can’t fix.” Castiel ran a hand over Dean’s hair. “I’m sorry.”
“I hate that wallpaper, Cas, maybe the landlord will finally get rid of it.”
“No, I mean… when the shock wears off you’ll-“
“Still want to be with you,” Dean insisted arms tightening around Castiel’s shoulders. “Yeah that guy found me because of you but you also neutralized the threat.” Castiel felt a smile tug at his lips at Dean using his jargon. 
“I let my emotions get the best of me.” Castiel touched Dean’s face gently. “It was a dumb move stabbing him. It’s sheer luck I didn’t get either of us killed.”
Dean turned his head, kissing the heel of Castiel’s hand. “You’re just a lucky guy, Cas.” Dean gave him a big smile, the one that never failed to render Castiel speechless. “You got me after all.”
Castiel huffed a laugh, his head dropping to Dean’s shoulder, and let his arms curl nearly double around him. Sirens could be heard in the distance, likely one of Dean’s neighbors called the cops at the sound of gunshots and Castiel relaxed into Dean’s hold as he began to hum “Secret Agent Man.”
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balmasedas · 3 years
Text
desperado / druglord!javier peña au. 
chapter one.
summary: reader is a dea agent. violence has arisen in the streets of colombia and she's determined to bring javier peña to justice. things take an abrupt turn when, instead of her finding him, he finds her and realizes they got much more interest in each other than just drug-related topics. 
warnings: only +18. overall, this is smut so smutty. canon violence. detailed warnings in every chapter. spanish traductions are in the notes, though for the sake of non-spanish speakers, spanish dialogues will be minimal and not relevant to the plot.
word count: 2.5k.
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You throw your sweater in the backseat of your car before exiting it. In the morning, you had dug through your boxed-up winter clothes after shivering in your shirt-sleeves as soon as you got out of your department. Now, the temperature has risen to the seventies and you give yourself a clap in the back for deciding to wear something decent underneath. Spring in Colombia is a nightmare.
The crime scene is packed with local police and DEA agents. There are no civilian spectators this time, they know better than sticking their noses in the Medellin's cartel businesses.
Upon your arrival, you don’t need to identify yourself to the uniformed men guarding the perimeter. They know you well by then. You are the only female in the team that has to deal with these kinds of situations —gruesome, gut-churning, dirty shit. Not a very much "lady-like" job, some would express. For that, you have earned yourself the title of a gritty woman. Maybe because you were gritty, maybe because you were a woman.
Sometimes, though, you find yourself wondering why you turned down some run-of-the-mill desk job back in Virginia. It would’ve been a dull routine, for sure — hideous, even; but gossiping about some flash romance between two co-workers is less taxing than having to witness five rotting corpses at first daylight. 
"Jesus Christ," you lift your sunglasses to your head. Your partner, esteemed, weary agent Steve Murphy, turns around at the sound of your voice. 
“You’re up early.” he asserts, with a raised eyebrow. 
You purse your lips. “Had a bad night. Ran out of whisky at one am.” 
Not even Hugo, or Hughie for his gringo friends, could help you. You forgot that his daughter would be celebrating her birthday and his all-night store would be closed until the next morning. Normally, you would own an arsenal of alcohol, but it has been an abnormal week and a hell of a night —starting with the spiral of violence that has arisen in the streets of Medellin.
"Well, look at the bright side: your stomach is empty," Murphy mumbles.
Looking at the bodies in front of you, you can’t agree more: their hands are tied-up to the oxidated wire behind them, hanging by their arms. They are barefoot and scantily clad. There is a visible gunshot wound in all of their front heads, some flies are already hovering around the open flesh. A quick death to eternal torture, you suppose.
"When did you get the call?" you inquire.
He fiddles with his wristwatch. "About two hours ago." you only hum in response, keeping your eyes in front of you and paying no mind to Steve who only grows impatient at your silence. "You think this was Peña's job?" he adds.
You nod in denial. "If it was, it doesn't make sense." Not one bit. "Peña works underground, quiet, like a sneaky rat. I'd even say they're more well-behaved than most cartels. So why do this?"
Why such a declaration of violence? Why draw even more attention from the authorities? 
"Maybe he decided to toughen his punishments?” You scoff at his remark.
“He can do that without half the city knowing it. A ditch is much more subtle than a monument to death blocks from the US embassy.” 
Murphy smirks. “Seems that you have given it a thought before, Sarchie.” you narrow your eyes. He knows you hate that nickname. Your tendencies to boss him around had brought you consequences: the unofficial title of a Sargeant. Sarchie, shortened and friendly.
“Killing someone? Yes, you. Multiple times a day.” you put your sunglasses back on and walk away. The forensic police won’t be there until the next half hour, at least, and you are too disquiet to wait around. Plus, your stomach is growling, but Steve doesn’t need to know that. “We’re gonna need their names, I’ll see what I can find. You have a little chat with the coroner and see if they can speed up the autopsy. The sooner the better, ok?” you spot the smirk on his face. You know what he’s thinking. You shut your car's door and point a finger at him through the window. A clear warning sign in your eyes. “Shut the fuck up and do it.”
(,,,)
Happy hour. You give up on the investigation and stop off at ‘Chiquita’, a popular local bar near your place. The prices are cheap, the drinks aren’t that good but they do the job. The place is crowded — hot couples with wet, glowing skin grinding against each other. Happy or horny or both. You take a mental note to have some fun later. 
As you sip at your bourbon and crack your peanuts, you let yourself dwell on what you found out about your case. You finally got the names of your five guys. For that, much research wasn’t needed: All of them had their IDs in their pockets and they were exactly who you feared they were: no ones. No ties to any big names, no official involvement in any cartel — at the most, a few minor possession charges. As for weeks, your few clues have led to nowhere and the enigma surrounding the Medellin cartel seems to worsen with every minute that passes by.
You hate mysteries. Colombia’s full of them. 
You take your second bourbon in one smooth shot and ask for another. You grab a colombian peso from your wallet and slide it across the wood. Your eyes stop at the picture of your parents that you carry around. It’s tiny and worn, just like your relationship with them. They haven’t heard from you in weeks, a fair deal, if anyone asked. They don’t have to deal with their fucked up daughter and you can focus on your work filled with dead ends and a ghost that haunts you while you’re awake: Javier Peña.
“¹Qué tomas, preciosa?” a velvety voice caresses your ears. A pleasant smile breaks quietly over your lips. Just in time.
You turn your head to the side. The stranger, with chocolate-skin and inviting eyes, is waiting for an answer. You tap your fingers against the glass.
"Bourbon," you say. "²Pero no me vendría mal un trago más." he grins and holds up two fingers to the barman. He sits at the empty seat beside you, he’s exuberating confidence. He’s offered you the bait and you'd taken it.
"³Algo más que se te ofrezca?"
You look him in the eyes. You know how the story goes from there. It isn’t any different than the one from last night, or the night before. As an apex predator, he's out for something to satisfy his hunger. He won't go home without reaching his goal and you're desperate enough to let him.
"⁴Sí. Hay algo más que puedes hacer por mi."
(,,,)
The fucking cat on the window has been staring straight into your eyes for the last fifteen minutes. Matias, the guy you've met hours before, is too focused on you to notice the awkward presence of the animal, so you don't bother shooing it away. 
He's enjoying himself, pounding into you in a symphony of lust bites and moans. But the sound of skin on skin doesn't match the intensity of your passion for this encounter.
It's not that his performance was terrible, it was just... soft. So soft, too soft. From the sweet nothings, he gasps on your ear to the gentleness of his grip on your hip. 
You aren't a sweet girl. If you were sweet, you wouldn't have traveled all the way down to Colombia to participate in the war on drugs. If you were fond of delicateness, you would've stayed inside and touched yourself to a Cristina Peri Rossi novel instead of searching for strangers at bars.
You don't like to believe you are a special case. On the contrary, you assume your attitude is the rule and not the exception. Not a hell of a woman, but a woman made of hell – waking up already worried about the hours ahead of you. How could you not? Your life is as wide and empty as the sky. Unstable, unpredictable. Anything can happen. A good meaningless fuck is the only moment you allow yourself to feel something — someone. By then, the detachment that gets you through the day disappears and raw feral emotion takes its place. 
You are addicted. It's like a drug, but worse. Drugs don't have feelings, people do.
You’d grabbed Matias' hand and wrapped it around your neck a few times but your request had been ignored; you’d even pushed his ass against your body so you could get closer to a feral touch, but he had insisted on something more caring and delicate. 
And delicacy just won't do. 
So, after a few tries, you give up. You lay still, under his heating body, dead eyes directed at your window. No emotion whatsoever, no release. Like a numb, stiff sex doll, rooting for his satisfaction. Forgotten until next time.
“⁵Donde?” he blurts in your ear. You evaluate your options quickly. 
“⁶Adentro.” Any other place would demandsñ more attention. By then, he would be aware of your passivity and asking too many questions. You don't answer questions, you make them.
His body tenses and trembles. You feel heat dripping between your legs but it doesn't come from you. He leaves a few small pecks on your neck — thankfully, the last ones for the night. Matias breathes over you for a few seconds before he gets off. You stare at the roof in silence, and when he asks if you finished, you simply nod.
You can't grasp what he says under his breath after you ask him, as nice as possible, to leave. What he does or doesn't vocalize, it doesn't matter. You won't be repeating with him. You never fucked the same person twice. 
Once you hear the front door shut, still resting on your bare skin, you lit a cigarette. The room is void of artificial light, and the cat is still in the same place, with his silhouette contoured by the gleam of the moon.
"Sneaky bastard." you chuckle, then get up from the bed and slowly approach it.
You stop at the wooded frame of the window, maintaining your distance. Not too close to scare him or him to scare you. He isn't a friendly guy. He isn't even yours — just a grumpy cat that stops by your department too often demanding some food. You tried to get him to come inside before, but all you had won from your offers were a couple of scratches. Nonetheless, the cat has seen more of you than many people have. So, even though you renegade from him, you found yourself inevitably attached. He's the closest thing to a family, after Murphy, of course. But Murphy hasn't seen you on your worst, yet.
"Hope you see the same shit I see." you grimace and shake your head. "Not like that, I mean... I should choose better who to fuck with. And they should choose better too." the cat remains silent –obviously– and you keep talking. "You could make yourself useful and spook them away before I have to." he meows, you roll your eyes and decide to leave him alone. "Then again, I could do it myself if I told them I hold long conversations with the stray cat that lives in my window."
You choose to take a bath and call it a night. You glide through the living room, though before you can reach the bathroom something stops you. There's a noise outside, some glass breaking down on the streets. You can ignore it, conflict isn't a foreign subject in Colombia, especially at late hours. But then it repeats itself a second time, and the third bugs you too much for you not to grab your night robe and take a look at it from your window.
The only light pole is out of order; there's not a soul in sight; music can be heard from afar. You see nothing out of place until you do.
Your car is parked across the street. All four windows have been smashed, the tires are flat. You barely waste time cursing before you flee out of your place. You thought the night couldn’t get worse but the world has a disturbing obsession with testing your patience. 
Once you take a step outside and approach your damaged car, you’re not sure where your chills are coming from. Perhaps, because of the unfriendly weather or maybe because you’re suddenly aware of how idiotic was your decision to go outside. 
Everything inside your vehicle is left untouched. There weren't objects of value anyways. You find no logical reason for someone wanting to wreck a car just because —yours, of them all.
Big red warning signs color your mind. Your eyes scan your surroundings with speed. It's a dark, lonely dessert. You're now sure that what happened isn't some random event. The victim could've been to another person, but you weren't just another person.
"⁷Discúlpeme, señorita." a voice throws yourself far from the source. You reach for your gun just to find nothing there. Damn you. "⁸Está bien?" you look at the man. An old man that, at first glance, doesn't represent a threat. His voice is gentle, his voice is tinted with a caring voice. You lower your defenses, just a bit, not enough to stay around.
"⁹Sí." you mutter.
Slowly, you walk back to your apartment. Old man glues his eyes to your form and you don't take your own off from his'. Before reaching the sidewalk, you trip with something. Your back collides against a car and you're ready to apologize when the owner exits it there’s not a sign of rage in his face. On the contrary, his stare is blank and his mouth doesn’t even twitch.
Bad news.
You intend to run, but another guy blocks your passage and two more appear at each side of you. You turn over to ask the old man for help, but he’s gone along with your last piece of hope. Can’t blame him, you would’ve escaped too if you had the chance. However, you can’t and the smartest thing to do is acknowledge it and work from it. 
You stay still thinking it will persuade them to opt for gentle treatment. 
How naive of you. 
A set of fingers dig into your arms, another one grabs you by the neck and lowers your head as they drag you into their car. Guarded by two of them who sit at your sides, a dark cloth bag is placed over your head and your wrists are restricted with a zip tie. 
All you have left now is your hearing, you pick up a few things: the engine roaring, the tires burning on the asphalt as you speed off, some spanish words thrown in the air. Nothing substantial, nothing of use.
You sit in silence and wait for the worst.
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