A/N: this week has literally forced me to be obsessed with this greasy little slasher (soooooo my inbox is surely open!) (gif creds: @stevesnailbat)
Pairing: Kurt Kunkle x Fem!Bimbo!Reader
Warnings: Spree (2020) related content, kurt kunkle, smut/suggestive themes, MDNI, slasher themes (blood, gore, murder, ghostface), pet names (baby, slasher), cam/stream sex
im sorry but gamer bf x bimbo gf trope is actually flooring me rn
he’s just this greasy little streamer you started watching and you’re this total babe who’s obsessed with him
and you are really obsessed with him
you are literally his Number one fan
if kurt kunkle has 100 fans, youre one of them. if kurt kunkle has 1 fan, its you. if kurt kunkle has no fans, you’re dead.
you plugging kurtsworld96 at any given chance, like he’s so confused the first time he hears you do it, but then he gets so happy and just pulls you in
you being the first one to be super excited about his amount of viewers/followers
a celebratory kiss for ur streamer bf 🥰
also getting really worried when he seems to be in a little bit of trouble (ie cops in the background yikes)
him always reassuring you that he’s fine and he’ll figure it out
you dont know it but he’ll do anything you say, even if it meant turning off his stream for the night
you literally suggested doing cam stuff together before chat suggested it, but now chat is like obsessed with that because theyre a bunch of pervs
you treating chat like a sassy lil mama (“ew! behave yourselves” “ask nicely” “‘put it in her ass’ oh cmon, you know better” “shhh, quit being bratty, thats not how good little viewers get what they want, now is it?”)
youre such a lil price gouger, youre like “okay if someone sends in $50, i’ll let you guys watch us” and chat loves you so obviously they end up doing that
kurt really really loves you, plus you do wonders for his numbers. viewers basically double when he even mentions you
“‘kill your gf’ pfft yeah right, i know all his tricks, i’d like to see him try!” and you’re like in his lap and grinning and he just grins at you and when you turn to face him, he lands a big ol smooch on you
even after months of being together, he still gets nervous around you
and you always tell him to “relax, baby, it’s just me” all while he’s literally buzzing in your presence
he probably likes his hair pulled tbh
like even when you just run your fingers through his hair, he’s purring, he’s so slutty for it
asking him to do skincare/haircare with you as an excuse to take showers together 😝
like of course he’s gonna do it 1) because he loves you and 2) because afterwards, he smells like a candy store
you picking out his outfits because what he wears now is actually a cry for help
no because he would actually let you treat him like a dress up doll
you being really excited about it and telling him to do GRWM and OOTD segments on his streams (which are completely led + narrated by you, but he doesn’t need to know that)
him teaching you how to play video games (even though you already kinda know, you let him have his moment)
you designing the clickbait thumbnails for all of his youtube videos and they’re definitely all sparkly and pink and cute
you begging him to come with you to get your nails done, telling him he doesn’t have to get his nails done, you just want him to go with you
but of course, you convince him to get his nails done (just a basic polish *cough cough* in literally neon green, his choice) and he flaunts it to stream
he definitely makes fun of bobby like “my girlfriend is literally so hot. where’s yours? oh wait……”
and you HATE bobby
you think he’s a bad friend to kurt, but you’d never tell him that. you just scheme like “noooo baby, hang out with me, not bobby” and he’s like okay 🥰
also him being a little protective and possessive over you
like when other attractive people glance at you, he’ll grab your hand or put his arm around you or ask for a little kiss (all of which you do happily)
i love yous are thrown around like none other, and it makes him blush everytime. even when youre just tuning in, if he gets that “i love you, slasher” message, he’ll go red as a tomato
oh that reminds me: youre favorite movies being slasher films like scream and scary movie and american psycho, and he’s not stupid so he definitely senses the theme there
bonus: he definitely buys one of those ghostface masks just to surprise you (and get into your pants)
you offering to help clean his car after particularly gory kills (and he knows ur really good with aesthetics and detail work)
also you cleaning him up after particularly gory kills 🥺
like he’ll come home with blood streaked down his face, and you’re like “aw baby 😟 c’mere”
he LOVES it, he feels like a little puppy dog around you because you take care of him so well
you are all about sneak attack kisses, and he never knows what to do with them, he just sits there and smiles while you hold his face and pecks his lips
bro eventually, he’ll start laying the rizz down on you (and he’s not very good at it but) its so sweet that he’s genuinely trying and happy
like he’ll just spit pick-up line after pick-up line whenever you’re around, and you just giggle and kiss him on the cheek
you don’t even have to ask and he’ll buy you cute clothes. not that he’s insanely rich or like raking it in, but he makes enough, and he will spend money on something nice for you before he buys something for himself
him begging to drive you anywhere and anywhere even though your car works perfectly fine, he just wants to do things for you
also him begging to rig your car with cameras, too, just so when he does have to be in your car, he can still stream
ummm bonus: he definitely sets up a camera above his bed so like not only can he do sleeping streams, but…. you know…… angles 😌
you bringing him snacks and drinks during his stream and he gets the biggest googly eyes
you’ll just walk in in like the skimpiest little outfits, grinning and winking at the camera before giving kurtie a sloppy kiss
yall he’s so fucking dumb (in a loving way), but you’ll get into the car in like the most revealing and tight top and he’ll get all nervous and try to angle the cameras like ‘yall seeing this???’ all while smirking to himself
him accidentally referring to you as his wife on multiple occasions while streaming
letting you put your songs in the queue every so often
bonus: after hearing you play it literally once, his new favorite song is ‘stars are blind’ by paris hilton. that shit bangs and he knows it
him making you a playlist of all his songs (and he actually falls in love when you mention the fact that you listen to it almost constantly)
he actually can’t believe you love him and you’re of fan of his work and you’re actually the cutest thing he’s ever seen (nice tits, too)
it takes a lot of convincing and proof on his part that you truly love him, but you’re not shy about showing it and you’ll prove it to him anytime he needs
i’ve literally never seen a movie nail modern social media as well as spree did,, like the earnest cringeworthy early 2010s vlogger content and the pseudo-feminist millennial instagram comedy and the unbelievably spot-on running twitch chat and the reddit incel forums its all an absolute stand-out point of an already great slasher. critics said spree didn’t add anything to the social media conversation that previous films hadn’t said but absolutely no one else is doing it this well. anyway go watch spree
Kurt Kunkle would 100% be a gamer bf. You’d have to beg him to come to bed because it’s 5am and he’s been playing all night, leaving you in bed all alone. You can hear him shouting over his headset to whatever 12 year old has killed him in the last game. 
You’d walk into his spare bedroom (the gaming room he had turned it into) completely naked and call his name, massaging the back of his neck. He turn around, a little bit jump scared because he didn’t hear you come in over the sound of gunfire in the game.
Once he catches a glimpse of your naked body under the neon light of the room, he’d rip his headset off and grab your hand. Running with you to the bedroom, because no game is better than pussy. Even losers like Kurt know that.
Throwing you onto the bed to the sound of his own laughter, and burying his head against your belly. “You want me?” He smirks, brushing his hair out of his face. Trailing his fingers from under your belly button to your slit, narrowly missing your clit. You direct his hand to the right spot, and he stays there completely still until you whine.
His fingers only start to motion when you beg, because boy does that man love any form of feedback.
Now hear me out, reader is friends with kurt and so they watch his streams and just chill there talking to him (they're literally the only viewer ) and one day kurt us jerking off thinking about the reader and it's on stream because he missed the stop button, or generally anything with kurt jerking off thinking about the reader does the job for me so yeah
pairing: kurt kunkle x gn! reader
tags: SMUT 18+ MINORS DNI, kurt being weird, exhibitionism (jerking off on live), reader kinda liking it
a/n: i like to think kurt’s wayyyy pervy. like if you were to call him out on it he would say he missed the stop button, but he fully did it on purpose. he knew he would have one set of eyes on him.
also i did not proofread this fyi
“well guys! i think it’s time for me to you know, log off for the night. don’t forget to subscribe and share this stream if you enjoyed! later kurties”
you knew you were the only one watching as he threw up his signature peace sign
cya kurt you lazily type onto your phone as you wait to see the big “STREAM ENDED” pop up on your screen, but no?
all you see on your screen is what looks like kurt’s ceiling. you’re about to close out the app before you turn your volume up to see if your ears are deceiving you.
moaning?
“yeahhh…y/n…j-just like that…”
you audibly chuckle to yourself while feeling yourself to grow embarrassingly turned on from this. was he really jerking off on live? thinking about YOU?
i mean, he definitely knows what you look like. you have dozens of pictures posted; he even took the liberty of liking some from four years ago, how sweet.
“you’re my biggest f-fan, aren’t you?” he asks no one as you continue to listen to the rapid sound of wet skin slapping.
little do you know, he knows you’re there. he wasn’t asking no one, he was asking you
he’s not even moaning anymore, he’s whining.
his whines get closer together and you can tell he’s about to cum.
with a final whine of your name leaving his lips, he’s cumming all over his stomach and black sweatpants.
feeling embarrassed for staying to listen to that, and for how hot and bothered you’re suddenly feeling, you decide to quickly close the app and get ready for bed.
the next morning you’re surprised to see the notification on your lockcreen from the streaming app.
New Direct Message from KurtsWorld96!
your heart speeds up a little bit as you slowly unlock your phone and open up the message. your eyes widen as 5 words sit on your screen.
Hi guys just thought I'd let everyone know that my art is working again. I fixed those damn screws. anyWAY KURTSWORLD96 GUYS REMEMBER TO HIT THAT LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE BUTTON TO NOT MISS ANY OF MY FUTURE CONTE *explodes as i cause a carcrash*