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#sometimes i just feel my oats
westernsunshine · 1 year
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Obsessed with the way my massage therapist was like ‘I’m going to show you a trick to relieve pain in your shoulders’ and it was literally just.. rolling my shoulders
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aynbf · 2 years
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actually i hate the depressing lack of meat & milk in this household
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handcat · 2 years
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why would someone ask for an iced macchiato with oat milk… girl that’s not… a thing… you want an iced latte…… why would you…
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babaroqa · 9 months
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once again my roommate doesn’t know how to ask if she can use something that i bought for myself
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inkskinned · 1 year
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"the curtains weren't blue on purpose. why should we care?"
my love! let me ask you this - did you eat breakfast today? this tiny moment in your life. just think about it. did you?
for some of you, the answer is yes and for some of you it is technically and for some of you it is does coffee count. some of you reached for cereal or gmo-free overnight oats or frozen waffles or 3-day-old pizza. sometimes we eat the same thing, every day, for weeks. i get tired of eggs randomly, only to go back to craving them desperately. i'm cuban; i take my coffee like my father showed me, very milky and sweet.
some of us ate in a hurry. some of us hate eating breakfast but if we don't we will get nauseous later. some of us took our meds first or took our meds after. some of us have a kitchen 5 feet wide and sometimes it's the biggest room in the house. some of us are confident there will be food in the pantry and some of us flinch and say well, the paycheck is coming. some of us turn on a podcast while we eat or we scroll our phones or write in our diaries.
some of us are choosing, specifically, not to eat breakfast. some of us are too busy. some of us are pretending we "just forgot," but we are ignoring the warning signs that everything feels too-heavy. some of us are so consumed with anxiety or grief that we can't eat. some of us can't stand up long enough to make our coffee. some of us have no table to sit down and eat.
i cannot tell you what an artist "meant" by their choices. but they did have to make a choice, conscious or otherwise, to give you information. to give you a little bit more light. each of these choices are little stars of data; connecting speckles for you to weave through, drawing a line.
you cannot use a mirror in a dark room. for some of us; we will not care that the curtains are blue, because that will just be a data point and not enough light to see by. for some of us, the blue curtains will be the same as our childhood bedroom. it will make us seasick. for some of us, blue will be the color of frostbite. it might look like a pixel up close; but from a distance, oh! the picture blooms.
i cannot tell you what will stick out for you. what will carry meaning. some of you will read the sentence "i didn't have breakfast today" and say "this means nothing." some of you will read that and say "oh, me neither." some of you will say "this means the character is probably a little grouchy." some of you will say "oh, i wonder if they're okay. why didn't they eat anything?" ... art is a mirror. i am holding hands with you, over space and time, and asking you to feel something with me.
i want you to read my work and find a blue pair of curtains. i want you to read my work and find things in it that i never imagined placing. i have no way of knowing what will resonate with you, that's true. and maybe i just was hungry while i wrote this, and thinking about the eggs in my fridge. but if you found meaning, that meaning is yours. it cannot be erased just because i didn't "intend" it. you created a different world by interpreting my work. it's collaborative! that's beautiful! that's stunning!
just! imagine looking at the night sky and saying - it's stupid to have a favorite constellation or a favorite star. they're just there.
because here's the thing - across centuries and cultures, we look up. we still find meaning in the stars. these beautiful, lovely scattered accidents. are you looking? they call. and we look back and say oh! of course we are!
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georgiapeach30513 · 8 months
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I’m Not Supposed to Play with Boys
Summary:  Ransom always gets what he wants.  Even if he has to wait.
Pairings:  Ransom Drysdale X Reader
Rating:  Explicit
Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, (step) dad’s best friend, smut, PIV sex, unprotected sex, age gap, dirty talk, D/s dynamics, degradation, teasing, edging, female masturbation/humping, fingering, finger in mouth, humiliation, body writing, oral sex (M receiving), daddy kink, voyeurism, 18+ ONLY
Word Count:  3.6K
Ransom Drysdale Masterlist
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Your dad looks at the rear view mirror.  Watching your face as the car looms ever closer to the Thrombey estate.  You try to remain neutral in your thoughts as more and more of the animal statues come into view.  Counting each one because the closer they were, the closer you got to the mansion.  And you hope that the person you had been longing to see was there.  
Your dad sighs, and you look at the reflection of his cobalt eyes, “Ransom is going to be here today, and I expect you to be on your best behavior.”
“You’re not my real dad, and I’m not a child.”
“You are visiting from college, and this is my friend’s family home,” his voice gets a bit more of an edge to it, and you roll your eyes.  He was so predictable.  Expected perfection from you.  Because you reflected on him.
“Honey, just listen to your dad,” your mom yawns, pushing her seat back, and closing her eyes.  There wasn’t even that much further to go, and she was already sleepy from who knows what.  Your step-father rolls his eyes as the creepy estate comes into view, but that pretty little Beemer was nowhere insight.  
“Do you think Linda would mind me taking a nap?” Your mom pets on his arm, and you feel like getting sick.  She was more of a friend than a mother.  She had you when she couldn’t even legally drive.  It was like the two of you had grown up together.  And sometimes you wondered if she was still trying to sew her wild oats.
He slowly removes his foot from the accelerator, throwing the car into park, “I’m going to see if they need any help in the kitchen,” you jump out before he could say anything.  He was going to wait outside with the family, while your mother took her ‘nap’.  You were going to wait where you could hopefully see that Beemer drive up.  They didn’t need help in the kitchen.  Everything was already outside.  But you did exactly what Ransom had asked you to.  And now you wait.
——
Ransom spots his best friend’s car, and gets a big grin on his face.  He was told that you were home from Harvard.  He doesn’t waste time saying his hellos, he needs a snack.  From the kitchen.  Into the house he walks, and straight into the kitchen.  He must have been quieter than he had thought.  You hadn’t noticed him.
Your back is to him, and he notices slow little movements forward.  Right at the table.  A soft little whimper is music to his ears.  He opens up a cabinet for a packet of cookies, and you push off the table, “What cha doing?” He looks all the way down your body before meeting your stare with an arrogant grin.
“N-n-nothing,” you answer quickly.  Smoothing down your dress as you look at anything that wasn’t him.  You have never been more embarrassed in your life.
“Looked like you were humping the edge of the table.  Where you fucking my grandpa’s table?” You shake your head no, starting to retreat out of the kitchen.  “Wait.  I’m not finished talking to you.  If I happen to lift that little skirt of yours am I going to see that pretty pussy wet?”
“Um…no,” why was him embarrassing you like that making you more heated?  Why was there a fresh gush of your juices to your core at the sound of his voice?
“Be a good girl, and lift up your skirt.  Come on, I wanna see.  Just wanna know if you’re still a desperate little slut for me,” slowly you lift up your skirt, and indeed the cotton gusset of your panties are darkened with your slick.  “You were saying?” He chuckles, looking back up at you.
“I’m sorry, Ransom.  I…”
“Oh, sweet little princess, what made you so weak in the knees?  What’s got you all needy and grinding on that old table?”
Your eyes drift down to the floor, and your cheeks heat up in flames.  He was going to make you say it, and you couldn’t.  You mustn’t.  “You know who.”
“Yeah, but that crush was a couple of years ago.  You can’t still have a thing for little ole me, right?”
“I — I had sex like you asked.  I’ve got experience now,” your voice is desperate when you try to tell Ransom that you followed his rules for you when you graduated.  You followed his instructions perfectly.  Listened to every word.  “I…”
“And you’re still a needy fucking thing.  What is that you want?  You want to suck my fat cock?”
“Yes!  Please!” Ransom’s mouth turns up into a devilish smirk.  Lifting his hand up, he curls his finger, beckoning you to him.  
You get almost to him, but he backs away, “No, no.  Show me what you were doing just a minute ago.  But hold your skirt up.  I wanna watch.  Show me how you get off when you think of me,” you gulp deeply as you walk back to the edge of the table.  Lifting up your skirt when you settle yourself on the mahogany.  Your lips spread over the wood, and it touches right on your clit, and you start grinding on it.
“There ya go.  I bet that feels good on your desperate little cunt, hmm?  You thinking of my cock splitting you open?”
“Yeah,” whining as you grind down even harder.
“Fucking you so hard that your head is pounding on headboard.”
“Yeah.  Yes!”
“Have you screaming out ‘Fuck me harder, daddy,” your hips race your forward.  Getting so close that you're panting out his name.  Getting just right to edge, when Ransom places his hands on your shoulders and pushes you off the table, “I didn’t say you could come, you greedy little slut.  Now let’s see how wet you are,” he shoves his fingers into your panties, and you moan when he gathers up your slick.
Holding out his hand, he stretches his fingers out, letting you see just how sticky and wet the mess in your panties is.  Smiling at his fingers before he presses them past your lips, “Be a good girl, and clean me off,” closing your mouth around his fingers, you suck yourself off him.  Circling your tongue around his thick digits.  Almost creaming your panties when you hear him moan.
“Now, let's go say hey to your dad.  I’m sure a good handshake covered in your juices is just what he needs.  Stay wet and messy,” he walks out, leaving you alone and uncomfortable with how wet you are.  Nothing left to do but follow him outside.  
——
Ransom smirks at you from across the lawn.  He has been having a steady conversation with your dad, but his eyes are always on you.  He knows how uncomfortably soaked you are, and he finds it hilarious.  It is a game to him to lick his lips, and readjust himself.  Waiting until you were swishing your thighs together when you see his thick girthy cock in his palm.  It was unfair.
Grunting, you stomp back inside.  Needing to get something to drink.  Who knew, maybe even taking a cold shower.  Anything had to be better than what Ransom was doing to you.  And the worst part was he knew!  He knew that he was driving you crazy.
“Did I make you mad, Princess?”
“You’re making me crazy!  I’m soaked, and I’m horny, and you knew.  You knew what you were doing when…”
“You don’t like me teasing you?” Crossing your arms over your chest, you shake your head no.  Ransom looks you up and down as he steadily walks closer to you.  Getting right in front of you when he leans to your ear.  Sniffing up the side of your neck.  His breath on you went straight to your core as more slick floods your underwear, “Get on your knees.”
“What?” What was his game?  What did he want from you?
“Get on your knees, and suck my cock, Princess.  It’s hard and waiting on your filthy little mouth.  Get on your knees now,” turning around, you can see the party going on outside.  He wasn’t serious.  The window was right there.  Your dad was right there.  With a view straight inside to you and Ransom.  
“You want my cock?  Well, here it is,” you look down between the two of you and his pretty cock is the only thing separating you.  Beads of precum at the tip making it look all glistening and pretty, and you crave to taste it.  
His thumb rubs over his slit, smearing his leaking juices over his thumb, and he paints the liquid on your lips, “Suck.  My.  Cock,” slowly you sink to your knees, kissing up his protruding vein, “As much as I would like for you to take your time, we do have an audience out there.  You wouldn’t want daddy to see me fucking your pretty little face, would you?”
“Uh-uh,” you whine as he pushes his length into your mouth.  You hollow out your cheeks, and grip the back of his thighs.  Rolling your eyes up to look at him.  His hand pets over your neck a moment before he starts thrusting into you.  You let him take control.  Allowing him to use your mouth as his personal fuck toy.
He holds tightly to your head as he fucks into you.  His eyes moving from your pretty face, stuffed with him, and then out to the guests outside, “Have you seen my daughter?” Your dad yells.  You try to scurry away, but Ransom holds you tighter.  His pelvis propelling into you more.
“No.  I think she had an upset stomach.  Maybe she’s been stuffing her mouth full,” Ransom snorts.  Casually talking to your dad while he drives into you.  He glances back down to you.  Your weight had settled on one of his feet, and while he was fucking your face, you were grinding on his foot like a bitch in heat.
“You think daddy can hear you gagging?  You think he knows that you're drooling for my cock?” You whimper, holding onto him tighter.  Undulating your hips, and soaking his foot with your arousal.  You are dripping wet.  Needy and ready to come.  Sputtering around his member, your drool leaks down your neck.  “You filthy little slut couldn’t wait for me to fuck one of her holes, could she?  You gonna be my little slut?  You gonna call me daddy instead?”
“Mhmm,” he pulls himself out of your mouth, and you gasp for air.  Your lungs sting as oxygen rushes to fill them up.  His cock slaps across your face, and you don't understand.
“Say it.  Call me daddy.  Tell me how bad you want my cock.  Even though I feel that sloppy cunt throbbing on my foot.  I need to hear you say it.”
“Daddy, I want you to fuck my face.  Need you to come in my throat?” Grabbing your head, he crams himself back into your mouth.  Stabbing into you so fast.  So deep he was making your throat bulge out.  And your body hunger for more air.
“Daddy’s gonna give it to you.  Almost there.  Gotta hurry.  Can’t let anyone see you being my pretty little slut.  Taking this big fat cock like a good girl.  Uh!  Uh!  Oh!” His head tilts back, and his load shoots into the back of your throat.  You moan at the salty musk that is Ransom.  Your hips fuck down on him harder.  Getting right there…
“I still didn’t tell you to come,” he meanly states, pushing you off him.
“Ransom!  That’s not fair!  I want to come, too.”
“What did you call me?”
“Daddy!”
“Oh, sweetheart,” his voice is so patronizing as he lifts your skirt, “Spread your legs.  Let daddy see what a pitiful little pussy this is,” you do as you're told, and he moves your panties aside.  Staring at your pulsing cunt with a smile.  “Pitiful,” he lets a drip of his spit drop onto your pussy, and you moan at the cool sensation.  
“What’s going on?” Your dad’s shadow falls into the kitchen, and over Ransom’s back, and you slap your hands over your skirt, covering yourself up.
“Oh, she fell,” Ransom says quickly.  Nodding to your dad as Ransom offers his hand down to him.  “I think maybe she should lay down somewhere.  She was acting a bit delirious.”
Your dad looks between the two of you, clearly not believing a word that either of you had said, “You’ll miss the fireworks.”
“I’ve seen fireworks before.  Ransom is right, dad, I just don’t feel right.  Must be all the excitement today.”
“Go upstairs, third door on the left.  There’s a window that you’ll be able to see all the fireworks,” you give him a nod as you walk up the stairs slowly.  “Is everything okay?” Ransom asks with a smirk.  He caught him spitting into your cunt.  He knows his friend saw you all spread out for him.
“She fell, huh?” He asks.  His eyes darkening as he walks closer.  Looking down at the floor to see a wet spot.  You were messy.
“Yep,” Ransom answers, popping his p.  He holds his hands out shrugging, “I don’t know what to tell you.  Your daughter is clumsy.  She tends to make a mess, too.  Did you know she was a messy little thing?”
“She’s not my real daughter,” he had to add that little bit of information.  Had to let Ransom know when he was looking at you, it was okay.
“Yeah, but you did really marry her mom.  Maybe you should go outside, daddy-o.  Isn’t your wife finally awake?” He shakes his head no, starting to walk back out.  Flinging his head towards the door.  Wanting Ransom to follow.  He had no such plans.  He was going to fuck you during these fireworks.  “Are you that lonely that you need me with you?”
“Are you?” His eyebrow cocks up, “Do you need me with you?”
“Touché.  Listen, I don’t want to be crass, but…”
“She fell, huh?  Is she going to fall again?”
“Yep.  Fall right on my dick.”
——
“You ready to come, Princess?  I got the perfect seat for you to enjoy your fireworks.  Look at this seat daddy prepared for you,” Ransom fists his cock a few times as you walk closer to him.  “There ya go.  You gonna show daddy what you learned in school?  I’m sure Harvard is all boring, but what did those boys teach you in your dorm?”
“I want you to fuck me, though,” tonight was all about you doing all the work.  You wanted nothing more than for Ransom to take advantage of you.  Didn’t care if everyone could hear you screaming.  You wanted him.
“Oh, Princess, this first time I want you to show daddy what those silly college boys taught you.  Sit on my lap.  Let daddy stretch you out,” taking a deep breath, you walk over to Ransom.  Straddling his legs, you grab the base of his cock, and run it through your slit.  
Looking into Ransom’s eyes, you slowly sink down over him, biting at your lip.  None of the boys from school felt like him.  None of them looked like him.  And when you sink balls deep on him, you know that none of them have ever been that deep.  Couldn’t even wish to reach the depths that Ransom did, “Daddy!”
“I know, Princess.  Daddy has such a big cock.  You just sit like that until your pussy doesn’t hurt anymore.  I got her all stretched out, huh?” You nod your head as you bite your lip.  Overwhelmed because you finally feel Ransom.  Finally have him inside of you.  Something you have dreamed about for years.  “You feel me in your belly, honey?”
“Yeah.  But it feels good.”
“Yeah it does.  You gonna let me cum in this tight little pussy?  You are so pretty when you’re a mess,” you slowly start to grind over Ransom.  Getting a better feel of him before you start to bounce on top of him.  Letting your pussy suck him right back in as deep as you could take him.  “Your titties do look pretty bouncing in my face.”
Fireworks boom outside the window, but you only see Ransom.  His mouth chases your tits, just so he can give your buds a nibble.  “Daddy!”
“I know, Princess.  Daddy wouldn’t let you come earlier today, because it makes you that much more needy.  It hasn’t been that long, and I feel your pussy fluttering around me.  My god, I don’t even think I can last.”
BOOM, “Daddy!”
“Tell me what you need, Princess.  Let daddy give it to you.”
BOOM!  POP!  “Daddy!”
“You keep getting louder.  They can’t hear you.  Tell daddy what you want.”
“Daddy!  I wanna come!  Daddy, let me come!”
“Your daddy will make sure you come,” Andy steps up behind you, those thick arms wrapping around your stomach.  One hand spreads your lips further apart, while the other starts making tight circles over your clit.  “Does my sweet girl wanna come?”
“Yes!  Daddy, I wanna come!”
“Woah, woah.  I’m daddy, and this is my princess,” Ransom pouts up at his best friend.  He knew letting Andy watch was a bad idea.  Sick bastard.
“Daddy is gonna help you come,” Andy moans, while you continue to ride Ransom, Andy has got you feeling like you're flying.  Overstimulated, and then he starts to kiss along your neck, while Ransom starts sucking on your tit.  His other hand rolls your nipples between his fingers.  Everything felt good.  Every part of you feels so fucking good.  Your skin is buzzing with euphoria.  “Go on, Princess.  Come.  Daddy’s gonna let you come.”
“Daddy!” You scream as your leg starts trembling.  “Daddy!  Daddy I’m coming!  I’m coming!”  
“Fuck, Andy, she’s got me in a vice grip.  Squeezing me so fucking hard.  There, baby.  Keep riding daddy, yeah!  Fuck yeah!” You moan as Ransom spurts creamy ribbons of his thick cum deep into your core.  Your walls pulse around him, milking every bit of his spend out on him.  “Fuck me!”
“I believe she just did.  Princess, you okay?” You get a dopey smile on your face, whispering yes.  “That was incredible.  How long have you two been fucking?”
“Just this once, Andy.  Now, I let you play with your daughter a bit, but why don’t you let me clean her up.  You’re married.  Don’t need to be fucking your daughter anyways.”
“Quit calling her my daughter!  She’s not my real daughter,” your eyes start to slowly close as you let your high wash over you.  You had him.  He was still in you.  He had filled you up, and it feels so fucking good.
“You’re just saying that because you want to fuck her.  You,” both men stop when you get up, and lay on the bed on your back.  “Princess, why don’t you spread your legs,” your eyes fully close, and you spread your legs.  Putting your gaping cunt on display for both men.  
They stare at your pretty and stretched out channel, and when Ransom's cum starts to leak out, they both gasp.  “My god if that isn’t the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.”
“She’s on birth control.  Her mom was scared she was sleeping around too much in college.  Let me guess, that was your doing?”
“Yeah, I don’t do virgins.  They get attached too easily.  Plus, I had her riding daddy’s cock like her life depended on it.  Could you see how deep she took me from your angle?”
“Yes,” Andy rolls his eyes.  “Saw you destroying her pussy.”
“Just wait until I fuck her.  Mmm, my cock is getting hard again.  If you don’t want to see me fuck your daughter in her sleep, I suggest you leave now.  Because I’m going to fuck that slut right into the mattress.  It’s too soon to share her.  You were supposed to just watch.”
Andy Barber never just watches.  He would fuck you too.  He’d make Ransom watch as he pounds into you.  Instead of going to you, Ransom grabs up a pen, “What are you doing?”
“Reminding her,” he says, scribbling ‘obedient’ on one inner thigh.  ‘Good girl’ written on the other.  “Princess, who owns your pussy?”
“You do, daddy.  That’s daddy’s pussy,” Ransom looks back at his friend with a smile.  “It’s all daddy’s.  Whenever daddy wants it.”
“Daddy’s cumdump?”
“Uh huh,” you smile as he writes cumdump on your belly.
“Daddy's pretty little cum princess.”
“Yep,” Andy stomps out of the room, making sure to slam the door.  And you pout up at Ransom.
“He’s just jealous that I’m going to pump you so full of cum, you won’t know what to do with yourself.  My pretty little princess cumslut.”
“Just daddy’s.”
“Unless daddy wants to share?”
“Unless daddy wants to share,” oh Ransom is going to have too much fun with you.  His personal little sex toy.  One he was going to have a lot of fun playing with.  And showing off.  His little fuckdoll that wanted him to do whatever he wanted.  And he would.  “Daddy, I’m sleepy.”
“You want daddy to hold you while you take a nap?” Nodding your head, you make grabby hands up at Ransom, and he crawls into the bed beside you.  “Okay, get some sleep, Princess.  You gotta be rested, so I can fuck you, right?”
“Right.  Shh.”
“I know.  Sleep.  Dream.  And I’ll be right here.”
Masterlist
Taglist: @tis-thedamn-season​ @marveloustaylortot​ @pono-pura-vida​ @sstan-hoe​ @missusbarnes-rogers​ @peaches1958​ @seitmai​ @smile1318​ @andydrysdalerogers​ @cjand10​ @midnightramyeoncravings​ @maroonsunrise83​ @donutloverxo​ @whiskeytangofoxtrot555​ @bambamwolf87​ @harrysthiccthighss​
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amagurith · 2 years
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just went to the store to get some alternative milks (to see if that’s something i could drink instead of cow’s milk)
came home with cashew milk and pea?? milk
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Yandere Manager
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Managers can teeter on the edge of being the most helpful and supportive authorities in your life or the worst. More often leaning toward the latter, it isn’t bizarre to feel helpless when they put a strain on your paycheck or your general health during and outside the work day. It’s infuriating and downright despairful when they use the power of management to make you miserable. But you can always file a report to HR or the branch head. Sometimes it’ll work but not always. More likely than not there’s more support for them further down the line which makes it even harder to contest. 
“(Y/n) didn’t I tell you to smile when you’re at the front? S-M-I-L-E!”
But there’s something just as alarming about the manager who doesn’t have that. No favor from directors, open to the reprimands of human resources, and even a criminal record to boot. There’s something that compels you to listen when you look for an ounce of sympathy in those amber eyes to find a tempest of unhinged madness. You can only begin to visualize in a fever-driven nightmare. 
That’s your manager. 
The lovely, awful, and disastrous manager that fills you with helplessness like no other. 
Yandere Manager is just so naggy. Not only to you but your coworkers as well because there’s always something to comment on. Even when it’s not insulting or condescending it just rubs everyone the wrong way. 
“The way the uniform looks on you makes it look like we dragged you off the street.”
“....”
“....You’re the one who gave her a uniform that isn’t her size.”
“Yeah, but she’s the one who looks homeless. (Y/n) how about you mind your business and actually do your job. Thanks!” 
Yandere Manager is especially unpredictable in his support of you. Sometimes joining unruly customers when they blame you for something you messed up on. While also defending you over something small that didn’t require anyone’s input let alone his. Situations with entitled customers is a coin toss with him.
“Miss I’ll just remake the drink for you.”
“No no, you don’t have to I just want to know what was used instead of oat milk.”
“Oh okay then it's…Mr. Manager?”
“....YOU!?”
“Me?”
“Oh no.”
“NEVER WALK INTO MY ESTABLISHMENT AGAIN!”
“What why? I didn’t–”
“IF YOU REFUSE TO LEAVE I’LL HAVE TO REMOVE YOU BY FORCE.”
“Ahhh!”
“Wait! You don’t need the crossbow! Put it down!”
“DON’T EVER SPEAK TO MY EMPLOYEE EVER AGAIN!”
You can hardly pinpoint a pattern to his discord even after his honest confession when you catch him rifling through your things. But he won’t explain why he steals your lunch or makes fun of you in front of your coworkers. Or why he slashes your tires and breaks the windows of your home. It gets so bad you’re starting to think he uses this supposed obsession as an excuse for his behavior.
“Will you please explain why you broke into my car…for the fourth time?”
“Hmmm no.”
“...fine don’t. Now get out.”
“No I don’t think I will.”
“I have pepper spray and a tasor.”
“I can handle pepper spray.”
~Kzzt~
“Okay fine, you win this time.”
But despite your suspicions, he’s very much obsessed. Convinced he’s owed your affections he doesn’t mind breaking into your home, invading your personal space, and making light fun-as lovers do. No, his more sporadic actions happen to be something like knee-jerk reactions of his love for you. Similar to cuteness aggression. Because in his mind he’d prefer to break another window of yours than murder the family next door for looking at you too long. 
“This will have to do for now. I mean they can’t pin me for their carelessness when driving into a ditch, right?”
Usually, he doesn’t mind just doing whatever he feels like but since you’ve caught and called the police on him he’s on a tight leash. Not because he’s at all afraid of the police. Not at all. It’s because then he’ll be breaking the hold he has on you. Let me explain.
The minute he did the slightest thing out of line you called the higher-ups who threatened him and assured you he’d be fired. Great. But when he cornered you in your own home with the possibility that this wouldn’t stop when he was fired you had to pause.
“Sure you might get rid of me at work but then you’ll never know where I am. Instead of staying at work with you, I might just be in your room or at your friend’s house, or in your car!”
“T-t-then I’ll call the police on you!”
“After I’ve already left? Well sure they can serve an order and arrest me if I’m too close but when I break out–and trust me I will–you’ll have no idea when or where I’ll be coming from. I’ll be a constant boogeyman over your life if you kick me out now.”
“.....”
“So don’t get me fired, kay?”
Yandere Manager who is only given a warning by his employers and police before you stop attempting to get others involved. As much as you hate to admit it, he’s completely right. For all the times you find him breaking in, already broken in, or stealing something of yours he’s never lied to you. The same can’t be said for others but even when he’s doing something wrong he’ll always be honest with you. 
“Mister Manager? Did you do something to my lunch?”
“No! How dare you accuse me of such a deplorable thing! I should write you up.”
“....(Y/n)?”
“Clyde.”
“What?”
“Did you mess with his food?”
“Yes.”
“Dude are you serious?!” 
Life with Yandere Manager isn’t going to be easy at first but when has it ever been for an employee like yourself? It’s best that you get used to your Manager’s obsession, heck it might help make your grueling shift a little bit better.
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HOW I’VE BEEN SUCESSFULLY LOSING WEIGHT: Notes from a former binge eater ♥️
*this guide is to show how ~I~ do things and offer advice on how to do it MY way. I am in no way encouraging anyone to do themselves harm. First off,
HEALTH IS WEALTH.
That being said.. this is literally the longest I’ve ever gone without bingeing. It’s just,,, easy this time. Once you get a feel of what it’s like to be skinny you just don’t crave junk as much anymore bc you KNOW it’s not worth it. The trick is to eat clean 90% of the time and allow your favorite treats 10% do the time. Fit them into your calorie limit!!! Here’s some personal favorites that have helped me lose like 20lbs in the past 2 months.
I tend to do one higher- calorie drink during the day (protein shake, Starbucks, etc) and one healthy filling but low cal meal and a sweet snack at the end of the night.
LOW CALORIE 90%
Mediterranean salad (~150): mixed greens, chopped bell peppers, cherry tomatoes, red onion. Little bit of feta cheese. Balsamic vinegar (not dressing or vinegarette!!!!) I don’t add meat but you could totally add chicken for low cal high protein choice. You could also add olives but I don’t fw them.
Chocolate Protein shakes from the gas station (loll). They’re 220 cal on average and a great treat. Strawberry one is good too.
SEAWEED SNACKS they’re literally 30-60 calories for a pack and kill my urge to eat chips!!! Please give them a try!
Soups. Soups that are already portioned and have the calorie amount posted. I add extra seasonings and spice to boost metabolism.
Coffee!! With almond milk and a little coffee creamer. It’s worth the calories if you want a coffee just make one it’s better than going to Starbucks.
Sushi: I’m vegetarian so I get an avocado and cucumber roll. It’s so good with fresh ginger and a little soy sauce. Sometimes I will be craving it allllllll day and have it as my OMAD so rewarding 🥹
Miso soup>>>>>> add tofu and seaweed and onions!! And mushrooms if you like them.
Monster Ultra energy drinks,,,, yeah I know they’re bad for you but I love them.
Fruits!!! I especially love strawberries, watermelon, cherries, blackberries, pineapple and mangoes.
TREATS 10%
Trail mix: dried cherries, pecans, walnuts, pistachios, cashews. High in calories but perfect for killing hunger. High protein keeps you full and muscles strong, high healthy fats will keep your hair and skin and nails beautiful.
Chocolates: SMALL PORTIONS. if you can’t eat just eat a piece without bingeing, do NOT buy a big bag. what I do is I buy a bar of whatever chocolate I’m craving for my bf and we share it piece by piece. Dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white, hazelnut, with coffee beans, with toffee, fruits, chocolate is the best thing ever 🍫
Starbucks! My fav drinks are matcha lattes (hot/iced), iced white chocolate mocha, caramel macchiato, and occasionally a pumpkin spice latte. Peppermint mochas on the holidays. Oat milk always
Baked goods. Same deal as the chocolate, ONLY BUY THE PORTION YOURE GOING TO EAT. If you have been craving a croissant, go get one. One. Don’t buy a whole dozen of them. You will end up bingeing trust me. My favs are cinnamon rolls <3
Habits
I’m going to the gym!!! Consistently for the first time in my life. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy. Spend 30 min on the treadmill alternating between incline walking and easy paced jogging. Put on a YouTube video. Wear pink and bring a cute water bottle. You have to make an experience out of it! I stick to cardio and full body stretches plus ocasional (light) strength workouts w my bf.
I don’t drink anymore. Just 🍃. Alc is so high in sugar and carbs and it’s literally poison bro. I know it’s hard to stop but once you do you’ll feel so much better.
I rarely weigh myself. I’m at my bfs house all the time so I only step on my scale maybe 3 times a month. It’s been a game changer!!!
MINDSET
I practice mindfulness and speak kindly to myself. Basically sweetspo + affirmations to myself all the time.
Taking more pride in your appearance will also help motivate you. You think you’ll still want to binge after you took a full body shower, clean PJ’s or outfit, painted your nails, skincare and makeup done, whitened your teeth and lit a candle? No thanks.
Limit stupid, negative, useless media consumption. Watch things that have to do with your hobbies/ interests and your social media algorithms begin to kinda clean themselves up over time. My pages are all about exercise, study blogs, beauty tips and sciencey stuff. No more drama or celebrity nonsense. Cut down your following!!
Remember you only have one life on earth. You’re young and hot once. Don’t you want to grab this chance while you have it? Unfortunately your beauty is your currency especially as a woman, so if there’s anything I can do to give myself a better life I will. Losing just a few pounds of fat will make the craziest difference in ways you’d never expect. Free and discounted stuff. More people smile at you and listen to what you have to say. Both literal and figurative doors will be opened for you.Clothes fit better bc they’re more flattering when your body is fit and healthy. While it feels good to get validation from other people, the best part of it is looking in the mirror and feeling proud instead of ashamed. The inner confidence that comes from successful transformation………….there’s no other feeling that compares. If you know, you know. I’m just saying,, the choice is yours 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Poor Things
First of all, Emma Stone’s performance is as good as everybody is saying. Stone takes a very difficult role that easily could have gone very, very wrong and makes it look like the most effortless thing in the world.
I have been looking at the reviews, good and bad, and I think that the minority of people who didn’t vibe with this movie had slightly skewed expectations.
Poor Things starts out at Tetsuo The Iron Man levels of fucked up, but by the end it has dropped to Edward Scissor hands levels of fucked up. This is probably plenty of weirdness for the average movie-goer, but true connoisseurs of mondo cinema should calibrate their expectations.
Second, apparently this is being talked up as a sort of feminist coming of age fable chronicling an everywoman’s sexual awakening and liberation, and it really isn’t that, and I think if you are hoping for that you’ll come away disappointed.
Better, I think, to look at it as an autistic coming of age fable and power fantasy, which I think it does a tremendous job at.
Very minor spoilers under the cut; really, this is more an essay about what I thought the film was about than a review, my review would be that it's somehow simultaneously a feel-good crowd-pleaser AND a movie where an adult woman with the brain of a toddler stabs the eyes out of a corpse with a scalpel and then plays with its penis (I wasn't kidding with the Tetsuo comparison)
Honestly now that I've actually written that out I have maybe underestimated how impressive it is that Yorgos Lanthimos made a movie where that happens on screen but somehow basically everybody loves the movie.
In terms of sex, we do watch Bella discover sex, but she very quickly comes to a conclusion about her relationship with it which never once changes throughout the rest of the movie:
She likes it, she likes it more with an attractive partner, she is utterly lacking in any kind of sexual jealousy, and she doesn't attach too much more to it than that.
This is an odd comparison, but Bella treats sex the way Joey did on Friends. A man acting this way is a sitcom cliche, but a woman acting the same way…
This is a film that is really, really not interested in the real-world consequences of this kind of sex; in fact, given that a pregnancy is the inciting incident of the film, it came off a little weird to me that the possibility of a pregnancy or STD was never really addressed (unless there was a line or two that I missed while I was in the bathroom).
For the most part, though, I was able to get past it by just thinking of it as a heightened world. The sets and settings are extremely artificial, and ultimately I figured, “Hey, if I can buy this kind of thing as harmless and fun in a sitcom, I can buy it in this other kind of heightened reality.
I will say, I don't think Bella is meant to be an every-woman, and that there's textual support for this in the film itself.
All of the women Bella deals with in some way question her approach to sex, making it clear, sometimes through explicit dialog, other times more reading between the lines, that her approach to sex is not for them.
If there’s any particularly feminist message in the film, it’s that when confronted with Bella’s bizarre approach to the world, none of the women get angry at her, and most of the men she meets do.
But Bella’s relationships with other women aren’t really the meat of the film, that’s more about her relationship with men, and particularly the way that they feel, deep in their bones, that they should have control over any woman that they have sex with.
Duncan Wedderburn, when he first discovers Bella and convinces her to go away with him, thinks he is tricking and seducing a beautiful naif who he can use and then discard when he tires of her. Their relationship disintegrates as it becomes clear that Bella hasn’t been tricked at all; she wanted exactly what he was able to give, a chance to sow her wild oats by having some no strings attached sex with an attractive, likable person in an exciting foreign city.
This makes Wedderburn increasingly unhappy and unhinged (He says at one point that he has become what he hates, a “grasping succubus”) much to Bella’s growing consternation. She has no idea why he can’t simply be happy having sex with her and otherwise letting her do what she wants, and he is so committed to a certain vision of gender roles that he can’t even begin to explain it, he can only lash out in frustration.
And that I think is the meatier part of the film; Bella doesn’t so much flout social expectations as she is simply totally unaware that they exist. 
Honestly I think the character isn’t so much coded as autistic as she just is autistic. Bella is a woman who is basically totally unaware of social expectations and constantly taken aback to discover that they exist.
More than that, she has to figure out a way to work around the fact that many of the people who become most enraged by her are also so totally lacking in self-reflection, and view their social situation as so normal, so self-evidently obvious that they cannot explain to her why it is she has made them angry. They suddenly fly into rages that clearly perplex Bella and which they themselves don’t even bother to explain, because they regard their own ideas as self-evident.
Bella is an idealized autistic hero; personally as outlandish as she is I don’t really think the film expects us to take the side of anybody else, and I think there are some fairly subtle and accurate bits of autistic behavior on her part.
She responds to life as a kind of social experiment, attempting to parse out a set of logical rules and, especially in the latter parts of the movie, she often justifies her actions with a perfectly sensible internal logic that the emotional men in her life can’t parse out. Late in the film, when she and Wedderburn are destitute, she prostitutes herself for 30 francs, and with implacable logic, explains the two reasons that Wedderburn ought to be quite happy she has done so: First, her john was much worse at sex than Wedderburn, which ought to satisfy his ego, and second, they now have 30 francs and the potential to earn more.
Wedderburn does not appreciate her logical approach.
Another thing that strikes me as very true is that Bella has a very odd theory of mind for other people. There’s a scene where, traumatized by the unspeakable poverty and suffering she sees in Alexandria, she puts all of Wedderburn’s money in a box and rushes out to give it to the poor. Unfortunately the ship is leaving, but two port attendants tell her that they will be staying on the island, and would be happy to deliver a package. She tells them that she has a big box filled with money and they should give it to the island’s poor, and they agree to do so. Now, the film never tells us one way or another whether they keep their word; but Bella herself retains an iron certainty that they did exactly what she asked them to. Now, we know Bella understands what lying and deceit are, because we’ve seen her trick people before, like when she chloroforms McCandles to run away with Wedderburn. But it never once occurs to her that these sailors might do something similar. Call it paradoxical, but that kind of thinking is common in autistic people.
There’s also the scene where the self-professed cynic Harry Astley shows her the suffering in Alexandria; he admits, when he sees how terribly it has affected her, that he didn’t tell her simply because he thought it was the truth of the world, but that her attitude made him angry, and he wanted to hurt her. A very common part of the autistic coming of age is the slow realization that not everything people tell you is part of a dispassionate, scientific search for the truth.
There’s also a scene in a whorehouse in which Bella argues that it would make more sense to have the women decide who is to sleep with the johns, so that then the john could be more confident that the girl was attracted to him, which he must doubt if he chooses. You can tell I’m autistic because I immediately had the thought, “Well, but the johns would probably be worried that nobody would choose them.”
One of Bella’s fellow working girls instead tells her, “Some of them like the fact that we don’t have a choice”.
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strawberrysturniolo · 3 months
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bookstore // bf!chris
summary: when you're having a shitty week, your bf, chris, takes you bookshopping for some retail therapy
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The past week has been complete fucking hell, and the worst part, is that I don’t even know why.
It feels like the world has been against me in every way, piling the most ridiculous things on top of me like I’m laughing stock, being used for someone else’s entertainment.
It’s not fucking funny. 
I have fully accepted defeat at this point, keeping myself secure in my room until it is deemed safe to leave.
My boyfriend, Chris, has been adamant on me going about my days like nothing is affecting me. As supportive as he is, and as much as I love him, I sometimes wish he would just let me wallow in peace and feel sorry for myself. That’s just not how he is though. 
“There you areee,” he sings as he comes into my bedroom with a hand behind his back.
I peek up over the blankets swarming me, trying to look around him and see what he is hiding from me. “What’s that?”
He grins. “Get out of bed and I’ll show you.”
I groan and lay back down, pulling the blankets back up.
Chris lets out a sigh and says, “Fine… I guess I’ll just have to drink this iced brown sugar oat milk chai tea latte myself…”
Damn it.
“Wait.”
I can picture the smile on his face. “Yes?”
“Leave the drink,” I command.
He tsks. “Come to the living room and you can have it.”
He wins this time. 
I pull myself out of the comfort of my bed and drag myself to the living room. He sets the drink down on the table and waits for me to retrieve it, and when I do, he says, “We’re getting you out of your bed today.”
“And how do you plan on achieving that?” I ask over the lid of my latte.
“By taking you to the bookstore.”
My eyes nearly fall out of their sockets. 
Chris hates going book shopping with me. While he often praises me for my interest, saying it’s adorable and that he can’t help but stare at me while my expressions change throughout the book I’m indulging in, he cannot stand going shopping with me. What turns into a basic trip to pick up one or two books turns into a three hour excursion with handfuls of books being carried out, and hundreds of dollars drained from my account. 
“You’re kidding.” I know better than to take him seriously in this situation.
“The opposite,” he surprises me. “I don’t want to worry about how you’re feeling, so we’re going to do some retail therapy with books. Plus, I don’t know when you’ve eaten, so we’re gonna get some lunch too. My treat.”
My cheeks blush at the idea of Chris wanting to shower me in his love today. He loves taking me to get something to eat, spending his money on me whether it’s a $10 chick-fil-a meal or a fancy steak dinner. While some boyfriends send their partner money to get their nails done, mine sends me some every so often to treat me to books. 
I always insist that he doesn’t need to, but Chris fights back every time, saying he has more money than he knows what to do with, and that I deserve to be spoiled, especially by him. 
I used to fight him on it, but I know better than to do that now. It always ends in a stupid fight, and I know he is doing this out of love, so the last thing I want is to turn into something negative. 
“Okay,” I give in, heading back to my room to change.
“I knew that would get you!”
Chris’ arms are full with books that I have accumulated since walking into the store. He sets them down every few minutes to stretch his arms and crack his knuckles, and I can tell he’s biting his tongue to keep from complaining. 
He watches me and nods along as I explain every book that I look at. He seemed interested in the first few, but as the list grew, I can tell he’s forcing himself to pay attention.
Feeling guilty that he isn’t enjoying his time and he is sucking it up just for me, I say, “Okay, let’s get out of here soon so your arms don’t fall off.”
“Baby, it’s fine,” he assures me. “I’ll buy a bag if I have to. Keep doing your thing. I can go look at something else in the store that interests me while you shop, but don’t feel like you need to cut your time short for me. The whole reason we are here is to cheer you up.” 
“I don’t want to spend all your money.”
“You aren’t,” he insists for the thousandth time. “And if you keep yourself from getting books because you feel bad, I’m going to come back and buy them for you anyway, so you may as well get them now.”
There’s no way around him. 
Another 20 minutes passes, and at this point, my body is starting to give out, so I can’t imagine how Chris is feeling after lugging books around. “How many do you have?” I ask, looking back at my boyfriend who struggles to keep up as we head to the checkout line.
“Twelve,” he says, sighing as he sets them on the counter to be scanned. I add two more to the top of the pile. “This is insane, you know that right?”
“You were the one who said ‘I insist! My treat!’”
He rolls his eyes, laughing as he swipes his card. “Yeah, yeah.” 
– 
The rest of the day is spent with me organizing my bookshelves, scanning the backs of each book to decide what to read while Chris orders takeout. It only seemed right that we ate something at home since he continued to let me know how exhausted he was after shopping. 
I practically inhaled my meal just so I could start reading one of my new books, sitting right next to Chris on the couch, who was still dissecting his food. 
Every so often, I can feel Chris staring at me.
“What?”
“Nothing,” he shakes his head. “You’re doing that thing.”
“What thing?”
He sets his plate down on the TV tray in front of him, then looks back at me. “I always know something good is happening in the book when you scrunch your nose. It’s cute.”
I cover my face with my book, now embarrassed at my outward reactions when I read, something I had no clue I even did. 
“Noooooo, don’t hide,” he says, pulling the book down so he can see me again. 
He moves to sit closer to me, resting his head on my shoulder as he stares down at the pages with me, placing soft kisses on my cheek every so often before letting himself become just as invested in the story as I do. 
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theoreticslut · 2 years
Text
「 your kiss is on my list 」
eddie munson x fem reader
summary: a little game of truth or dare leads to lots of shock, a not jealous eddie, and your first kiss.
requested: no
word count: 2.7k
warnings: alcohol use/mentions of being drunk, slight playboy steve (early s1 personality), jealousy, pet names (honey, angel, & princess), bed sharing, fluff
a/n: if you don’t know by now, i love eddie munson so fucking much. i’m literally getting ideas for him daily. i hope you like this & if you’ve got an idea you’d like to see written, feel free to send it to me! Xx
title insp. from kiss on my list by daryl hall & john oates
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“Oh my god!”
“Gross!”
“You’re a pig, Harrington.” Robin’s voice cuts through the rest of yours as he and Eddie laugh at the confession.
Needing time and friendships away from the little group of 15-year olds you’ve all somehow adopted, the five of you - Steve, Nancy, Robin, Eddie, and yourself - have started having weekly get-togethers. Sometimes you’ll all sit around and watch movies as you munch on junk food, and other times you’ll have a makeshift house party/game night like tonight.
“You asked for the truth!” Steve laughs, taking a swig of his beer as an amused smile settles on his face.
“You didn’t need to be so detailed. We’re not drunk enough for that yet.” You groan, trying to clear the mental image your brain cruelly created.
“That’s not my fault.”
“You’re right. It’s not your fault that you’re a complete lightweight.” 
“Hey! Not a lightweight.” He defends, slightly pouting as he points at you.
“Yeah, he’s not a lightweight, honey. You just don’t drink enough.” Eddie pipes in, slinging an arm around your shoulders as he stands behind you, having gotten up to get himself another drink.
“Are you really going to make me the villain here, Eds? Just because I’m not a borderline alcoholic like the rest of you?” 
At your cocked brow, all Eddie can do is smile, chuckling as he shakes his head, pulling you against his chest as you sit on a stool at the counter jutting out into his living room.
After the events of spring break, the two of you have become quick friends, having spent a good majority of the six months that have passed together. The rest of the group - especially the younger kids - love to tease the two of you for how quick you became “friends” - as they like to put it. 
You don’t mind though. You really enjoy having Eddie around, and it’s not like you haven’t had little thoughts of him from time to time. It’s just that you’re friends, and you’re perfectly fine with that.
“Of course not. I’m just trying to get you to drink more, princess.” He smirks as you roll your eyes at him.
“Get me a drink and maybe I will.” You challenge, meeting his eyes as you do.
“Alright, alright. Let’s get back to pl-aying the game!” Robin almost whines, hiccuping as she does so.
“Steeeeve, you get to ask someone.” She giggles, definitely drunk at this point in the night.
“Alright. Y/n, truth or dare?” Steve questions, and you pretend to think about it for a moment.
“Hmm, I guess I’ll go truth.”
“What was your first kiss like?” 
At the question, you can feel Eddie turn his attention to you, apparently being curious of the question himself as he hands you a drink.
“Gonna have to give me another question, Harrington. I don’t have an answer for that one.” You chuckle airily, popping the tab open on the can before taking a sip.
“You don’t have an answer? How come?”
“Have you not had your first kiss?!” Nancy gasps, drawing a hand to her mouth as she watches you.
At her question you feel everyone look at you as a silence settles over the room, waiting for an answer as you sip on the beer Eddie brought you.
“Why do you all look so shocked?”
“Because you’re like…you. How have you never been kissed?” Steve questions, completely mind blown at the knowledge. 
“Because I haven’t….?” You question, not sure what other response there is. 
Looking around at everyone, you find that they’re all still in stages of shock or confusion.
“I volunteer to be your first.” Steve comments, filter gone with even the tiniest bit of alcohol. 
“Like hell you will.” Eddie snaps, glaring at the jock.
“Why not? I’ve been told I’m a great kisser.”
“He is.” Nancy mumbles, giggling in her drunkenness.
“See?” The prior ‘king’ points out, a slight air of smugness to him as Eddie grinds his teeth.
“Because her first kiss should be with someone she actually likes, Harrington.” Eddie scoffs.
“But she likes me. Don’t you like me, y/n?” 
“Someone as more than a friend, asshole.” 
“If she’s comfortable with me, though, wouldn’t that be more important than ki-“ Steve starts to question before Eddie cuts him off, the two arguing about the topic as if you weren’t even there.
“Shut the fuck up or i’ll make you shut up. She’s not going to kiss you.” 
As Eddie talks, you feel him step closer to you, as if trying to protect you.
“What’s it to you anywa-wait, are you jealous?” Steve asks, mouth agape as he scoffs humorously.
“I’m not jealous.”
“Sure you’re not, bud.” 
“I’m not. I just don’t think she should be kissing you.” Eddie states.
“Besides, I don’t think Nancy would appreciate your lips on someone else’s.”
As the two boys argue with each other, you look to Nancy and Robin, who just seem amused. 
If anyone had asked you four hours earlier how a game of truth or dare would turn into a discussion of who your first kiss should be, you’d have no answer, having thought it impossible. Sitting here, though, you realize how absolutely nothing is impossible for this little group.
“Hey, buttheads! The only one who has any say in who y/n’s first kiss will be is y/n. Yeah?” Robin questions, cutting the two guys off from their argument.
“I would hope so.” You retort, looking up at Eddie as he hovers over your shoulder, still glaring at Steve as he grinds his teeth.
“Yeah. Yeah. I’m serious though; I’ll happily be your first kiss if you want me to be.” Steve states, sitting back on the couch as Eddie lets out a tense breath.
“I’ll let you know if that day ever comes.” 
He nods, taking a big gulp of his beer, finishing the can as Eddie turns his attention to you.
“Do you want another beer?” 
“Nah, I’m alright, Eds. I’ve still got some.” You smile, shaking your can to show it’s still about halfway full.
“Alright.” He mumbles, smiling lightly as he releases a deep breath, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as he stands to the side of you.
~.~
“Bye guys! I’ll see you later. Be safe!” You call, waving to your three friends as they climb into Steve’s car, leaving you and Eddie to yourselves in his trailer.
Watching them drive away, you turn to close the door but stumble over your feet.
“Careful, honey.” Eddie states as you giggle, righting yourself up again and closing the door.
“I’m good, Eds. Promise.”
“You’re not drunk are you? We were up all night the last time you got drunk.” He questions, hoping you’re only tipsy. 
Even though he knows he’d stay up with you all night again, listening to you ramble about whatever crosses your mind, giggling as you slur your thoughts to him, he’d much rather get some sleep.
“Not drunk. Just tipsy and tired, Eds.” 
“Alright, angel, if you say so. Let’s get to bed, yeah?”
He watches as you nod, smiling softly before you shuffle across the room to him. Chuckling lightly, he slings an arm around your waist to help guide you to the bedroom where you’ve stayed plenty of times before.
“Hey, Eddie?”
“Yeah?”
“You got a shirt I could borrow? I didn’t think to bring pjs.” You pout, looking over to him with sad eyes.
“Course I do, princess.” He chuckles, digging through his dresser to find a clean shirt. He’s definitely got to do laundry this weekend.
“Here you are, honey.” 
As you turn to him, he tosses you a black tee shirt, some metal band logo on the front of it. It’s worn, the band’s logo faded and crinkled in spots, but you don’t think you’ve ever felt anything softer. 
“Thanks, Eds. Be right back.” You lazily smile, making your way over to the small bathroom.
While you’re gone, Eddie changes into pajamas of his own - the only time he wears them. Typically he’d just sleep in his boxers, possibly with a tee on, but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. Hence why he found himself digging out the few pairs of cotton bottoms he had stuffed in one of the bottom drawers of his dresser the first night you had stayed over.
You’re also the reason he’s been washing his sheets more often, not wanting you to be sleeping on a dirty bed. He may have only known you a handful of months, but he’s almost completely changed his habits at home on the chance that you’d be over.
He’s tidying up his bed as you come back in from the bathroom, his shirt hanging on your frame, just long enough to cover you. He can’t help but notice how much of your thighs are on show though, gulping lightly as he tries not to stare.
You’ve never been anything but beautiful in his eyes, even from the first time he set eyes on you back in the boathouse, wild with fear as he held a broken bottle to Steve’s neck. In all honesty, half the reason Dustin was able to talk him down was because he was so focused on you, wanting to know who you were and why you were here, looking for him of all people.
You’re the reason he dove into the lake back when all five of you ended up in the upside down. You had been friends with Nancy before all of this came about, and as soon as she dove in after Steve, you were diving in after her to make sure she wasn’t doing anything more stupid than diving into murky waters to save her ex - whom she still has feelings for - as he was being pulled under. 
Although you had called him stupid for following all of you into the water, he had done so for the same reasons, having wanted to make sure you were safe. Not that he needed to worry, though, as he found out when you fearlessly fought demobats off from the five of you.
If Steve thought he’d get your first kiss, he’s dead wrong. Why would he get your first kiss when he’s always been too focused on Nancy. Eddie’s the one who’s always had eyes for you. 
“Eds, you ready for bed?” You question, pulling him from his thoughts where he realizes you’ve been waiting for him.
“Yeah. Sorry…zoned out.”
“I noticed.” You giggle, crawling into the bed as he gets himself settled.
As you situate yourself into the bed beside him, a silence falls between the two of you where his mind continues to race.
“You’ve really never kissed anyone before?” He questions, still not believing it.
“Why is that so hard to believe?” 
“It’s not. It’s just, surprising. Like Steve said, you’re…you.” 
“What does that even mean?” You chuckle, looking over to him with lightly furrowed brows.
“You’re pretty. Like really pretty, and you’re so fucking cool. You’re kind, and warm, and so good with the younger kids, but you also kick ass. You’re just…amazing.” 
“But people like Steve just see that you’re pretty and find that good enough.” Eddie huffs, jaw setting as he juts his lip out.
If you weren’t trying to calm him down, you’d find his angry little pout adorable, but you can’t focus on that right now.
“Hey - look at me.” You coax, turning onto your side to face him.
“Why are you all upset, Eds?”
“Because people like Steve shouldn’t be your first kiss. He just wants to kiss you, and that’s not right. You deserve to have your first kiss with someone who actually likes you, you know?”
“That so?”
“Yeah. I mean, at this point you shouldn’t just go for anyone. Go for someone that’s going to want more than just a kiss.”
“It's cute when you’re jealous, Eddie.” You smile, loving how he stutters and pouts at your words.
“I-I’m not jealous. You can kiss whoever you want.”
“If you say so…you have nothing to worry about, though, Eds. I won’t be kissing Steve anytime soon.”
“If I were to kiss someone, it’d be you.” You state, smiling to yourself as he nods, sighing in relief at your first statement as he’s a little behind. You can see his brain pause as your words slowly sink in.
By the time he’s turning his attention to you, though, you’re already turned away from him.
“Say that again?”
“If I were to kiss someone, it’d be you, dumbass.” 
“Are you saying-“
“That I like you? Kind of.” You chuckle, glancing at him over your shoulder as his brain works through your words.
When they all finally process, all he does I stare at you in shock, with a little bit of confusion thrown in. You like him? Like actually like him? And you want to kiss him?
“Wh-what does this-?” He questions, wondering what this means and where things are going right now.
“I think you should kiss me. If you like me, that is. If you don’t then it’s-oh!” You half gasp, half moan as his lips find yours.
Registering the fact that he’s kissing you, you find yourself relaxing into the mattress, letting your lips follow his.
“You talk too much sometimes.” He mumbles, barely a centimeter of space between your lips.
“No more than you do.”
“At least I’ve never told you to kiss me and then kept talking as if you wouldn’t. Just tell me to kiss you and shut up so I can.” 
“Kiss me again then, but don’t stop.” You challenge, just wanting to feel his lips on yours.
Upon first meeting Eddie, you can’t say you were immediately enamored by him. You more so just felt sorry for him for everything that had happened, knowing how terrifying your first experience with the upside down shit is. 
As you and the group helped him though, talking to him as he tagged along, you found yourself being amazed by him. Between the way he would joke around, the way he looked out for the young boys, the way he fought even though he was terrified, and the way he cared for you even though he’d only just met you, you found yourself seeing him in a whole new light. One that slowly had you falling in love.
It wasn’t until after the fact, though, when the two of you started hanging out frequently that you truly fell for him. You got to see all the different sides of him from how passionate he was about Dungeons and Dragons to how peaceful he got when playing his guitar, even to how much he truly was a teddy bear by nature. 
He was everything you ever wanted in a partner, and it was even better that he was insanely attractive with his wild hair and big, chocolate-y eyes. How could you not end up falling for him?
“Your lips are so soft, honey.” Eddie murmurs, forehead resting on yours as he smiles against your lips, eyes closed.
“I think yours are softer.” You smile, running your thumb over his cheek as you look up at him.
“Not in the slightest.”
At his chuckle, you can feel your heart race as a soft smile finds a place on your lips. It takes a moment longer before he pulls away from you just enough to look over your face, admiring each and every feature.
“You know, I think I just might love you.”  He comments, watching your smile deepen as you shy away from his words.
“I think I just might love you, too, Eds.”
With your admission, a smile grows on his face before he’s leaning back down to you, pressing his lips to yours in a needy - yet loving - kiss. There’s nothing that could make the two of you happier right now when you’re curled up together, lips molding with each other’s as you let every unspoken admiration leave your body wordlessly. 
Every kiss only solidifies the silent admission that you are his and he is yours, and nothing could possibly be better than that.
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gabessquishytum · 5 months
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Hot Chef! Hob + kid fic prompt
Dream has food issues okay, and for this and number of other reasons, including that he now has full time custody of Orpheus and can't just forget meals or feed his son soy sauce packets 🤷🏽‍♀️, Dream (well his sister) hires a home chef.
Now there will be food in the house, that Dream learns to warm up and Orpheus has vegetables to eat. What Dream wasn't expecting was a gorgeous man, covered in tattoos that come with [fun] stories, who's great with Orpheus. Many days pass where Dream breaks from writing to find Hob and Orpheus making dessert together.
Dream is smitten.
I ABSOLUTELY love this, we need more chef Hob stuff!!! He's so perfect. My preference is for Hob cooking Indian food a lot, but honestly I just love the whole idea of him in the kitchen,,, sleeves rolled up,,, tattoes on display,,,
Hob is great. Normally Dream can handle breakfast, it's the one meal he has a reasonable grasp on (pour cereal, pour milk, burn toast, make more toast, etc). But at weekends Hob comes in to do a special cooked breakfast like pancakes, omelette, vegetable umpa, oats idli (which is Dream’s new favourite thing, its the only thing he can stomach in the morning and it fills him up properly). Hob is fun to have around and it really feels like a family breakfast, which is great for Orpheus. He's really coming out of his shell and it makes Dream a little misty eyed.
Most of what Hob makes is cooked and frozen to be heated up later, but he insists on doing fresh meals occasionally. Dream is convinced that Hob just wants to make sure that he eats, and he's not as annoyed by that as he probably should be.
"Good food is my love language." Hob explains with a shy smile. "It makes me happy to see people eat."
And Dream tries to convince himself that Hob is talking about Orpheus, there, but... he's not sure. Sometimes Hob gives him steamy looks across the kitchen that Dream wants to melt right into.
Maybe he should ask Hob to make a romantic candlelit dinner for the two of them. Dream still has a fridgeload of issues, but he's smart enough to know that if he doesn't snap Hob up for himself soon, someone else is going to. A man with biceps like that who can cook?? Dream needs to put a ring on it, asap. If Hob will have him...
(He will.)
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being-addie · 11 months
Text
Rest Days
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It's currently peak summer where I live, and it is SWELTERING. While I'm planning to be as productive as possible (I'm not kidding my sketchbook is with me 24/7 at this point), thanks to the heat, I'm finding it really hard to stay focused sometimes. So when I'm feeling particularly lazy, or just distracted I take a rest day. I feel like I can afford this right now more often because it's the holidays, but when my classes restart in June I won't be able to even sit down.
ANYWAYS. Here's what I'm currently doing during an easy rest day. Maybe you can take some inspiration <3
My rest days:
Sleep in: I sleep until it's nearly 7:30 - 8:00 am. It's late for me because usually, I wake up at 6:00 am
Move around: If it's cloudy, I'll go for a walk, otherwise, I'll cycle to the gym.
Breakfast: I usually have this thing, where I saute some veggies, scramble eggs, and cook savoury oatmeal, then mix it all together. It's healthy and filling and it's amazing with barbeque sauce. If I'm craving something sweet, I make banana-oat pancakes (which taste and look so much better than regular pancakes I swear)
Sit in the sun: It's morning, and the sun isn't harsh, so I sit in the balcony with my cold coffee and chat with my mom as I soak up that Vitamin D
Watch a little TV: I'll watch like 2 episodes of the show I'm invested in (I'm watching Big Bang Theory)
Get ready: Take my sweet time bathing, doing my hair and getting dressed.
Sketch: So this is both productive and relaxing for me, so I'll pull up Pinterest and do some practice or I'll go to a cafe and do a live study.
Do a little crafting: Ok so this is my therapy. I'm not joking. I put on some Lana Del Rey, and make a mess of my desk. I love making little handmade gifts for family (I just made this insane exploding box thing for Mother's Day lol) or making paper crafts. I'm learning how to crochet as well. Highly recommend it. Put in your earphones, get your scissors out and start making something. Doesn't have to be pretty, just keep going.
Watch the sunset: My gallery is so full of pictures, I don't have any room for anything at this point. 85% is just sunset pictures.
Evening: I just eat dinner with my sister and grandpa, and then we like to sing and dance as I load the dishwasher and she cleans the table.
Read: After chores are done, I read on my tablet for a while.
Sleep: Bedtime skincare and lights off at 10:30.
I've actually done this in way more detail than I thought haha, but this is basically a way more relaxed version of my daily routine, just no studying?? But yeah here it is.
Understand that rest days are required. You do not have to constantly work. Humans are meant to socialise and have fun, as well as work. We aren't worker ants or bees. Relax, and remember to breathe. Everything will be ok. xoxo.
<3
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Text
Black Light 12
Warnings: noncon, namecalling, violence, other dark elements. Proceed with caution.
Note: Thank you for waiting! Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.
Part of The Club AU
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You feel a bit dreamy. Well, you always do. You sit in your bed, freshly made, fragrant with fabric softener, as you cut through the pages of old catalogues. Your fingers are sticky with glue as you arrange the images just so.
You can hear your mom downstairs, the bluetooth speaker playing Hall and Oates to her content. Your dad's outside trying to fix the fence post. You can hear him swearing through the crack of your window.
You hold out the scrapbook. You just need that globe right in that little space. Oh, the leather sofa is perfect.
You leave the book open on your bed to dry so the pages don't stick. You put on your dress with the daisies on white and spin in the mirror. Your yellow beret will go perfect. You put the hat on and a pair of matching clunky maryjanes.
You go downstairs and find your mother scavenging in the tupperware container you left on the counter. You squeal as she quickly closes the lid and covers her mouth guiltily. She backs away and giggles.
“I couldn't resist,” she says through a full mouth.
“Mom!” You stick your tongue out as you snatch up the container of cookies.
“You don't need all those,” she accuses.
“They're not for you.”
“I know, so… who are they for?” She tilts her head coyly.
“Someone,” you roll your eyes.
“A boy.”
You harrumph, “he's too old to be a boy.”
“Oh my gosh! That's so cute! Do we get to meet him?”
“No,” you pout and turn your chin up, “it's new.”
“Well, be safe. Don't get into too much trouble.”
“Yeah, yeah,” you drag your feet and stop in the doorway, “mom, can you not tell dad?”
She laughs again, “sure, sweetie, our little secret.”
You smile, cheeks twitching. You don't need your parents nosing around. You're still figuring this all out.
🍪
You wait outside the club. It's almost seven. You thought he'd be there by now. The other bouncer is. Lee, that's his name.
You're not weird or anything. You've just been watching from across the street for an hour or two. Not your fault he didn't leave his number.
You cross the road as you see Lee come back out. He sees you and smiles. He's so friendly, you wish August would try that.
“Hi,” you hop over the curb, “is Auggy here yet?”
“Auggy? Nah, he's taking his time,” he eyes the container in your hands, “what's this?”
“Oh, just a surprise. You want one?”
“Depends. What's the surprise?”
You balance the container against the scrapbook beneath it and pop the corner of the lid up. You offer him one of the jelly cookies. They took you hours as you baked and waited to cool before adding the layer of jam and custard.
“Wow, you're a big baker,” he muses.
“Sometimes,” you preen.
He takes one and admires your craftsmanship, “my wife ain't so good about it. But she tries, bless her heart.”
“Oh, you have a wife?”
“Sweetest gal in the world,” he grins, “she's at home with the baby.”
“Baby?”
“Ah, just a cat, but she treats him like a child,” he chortles and takes a bite, letting out a hum.
“Ooh, I love kitties! What's his name?”
He swallows, “Hickory. He likes her better'n me.”
“Aw, adorable.”
“Maybe you can come meet em one day. You and Auggy. Like a double date?”
“Really!?” You snap the lid shut, “oh, I'd love that so much.”
You hear grumbles and the tramp of soles as a shadowy figure appears from the alley. Lee turns and throws a hand put derisively, “bout time.”
August stops short as he looks between you and Lee, his expression limned in the early hue of evening. His brows draw together as he coughs. He crosses his arms and glowers.
“What is she doin’ here?”
“Ask her,” Lee says before he tosses back the rest of the cookie and turns on his heel.
He pulls open the front door and disappears as you stand watching August. He drops his arms and marches towards you, past you as he goes to follow his fellow bouncer. You quickly get between him and the door.
“Sweetie, I brought you cookies!”
“What?” He reaches past you as you put your back to the door.
“I haven't heard from you in…. Like three days.”
He glares at you. You open the container and show your wares. He only pulls on the door, jarring you but not dislodging you.
“I got work–”
“And I brought you a surprise! So eat a cookie.”
He narrows his eyes. You stay locked in a stalemate as he tries to pull the door again. You lean into it and plant your heels.
“I'm being real nice here, sweetie, so take a damn cookie,” you feel a surge in your chest.
“Can't you take a hint?”
“Can't you?”
“What– look, I told you, this isn't a relationship or whatever you think it is.”
“I'm not stupid. This is real,” you insist, “get it? Me and you, Auggy Bear, together forever.”
“What are you–”
“Here,” you shove the container at him.
He doesn't move but you jam it into his chest and he finally relents and supports it.
You slide the book from beneath it and open it up, “this is our future. You see? Our home,” you show him the little touches of colour amid the neutral hues, a perfect melding of your personalities, “and our honeymoon. I'm open to change but I was thinking a cottage–”
“Are you insane?” He breathes scratchily.
“Insane?” You repeat and bat your lashes, “don't call me that.”
“We fucked. Once. There's nothing else between us–”
“There is!” You holler and slam the book shut, “and you know it. You would never have followed me home if you didn't mean it–”
“Shhh, shhh,” he waves you down, “hey, lower your voice.”
“That's what you did. You stalked me, sir, so… you want me too. You want me or you wouldn't have done what you did.”
“Please, just… calm down.”
“You won't even eat a cookie!” You accuse.
“Be quiet,” he hisses.
“Eat a cookie!”
“Would you listen, girl?”
“No! No, you will eat a cookie. I spent all day making them and– and– I'm not crazy. I'm not,” you clutch the book tight.
He sighs, his blue eyes gleaming as he slowly lifts the lid. He takes out a cookie, showing it to you before he takes a nibble. He swallows without chewing.
“There, happy? Now go home.”
You scrunch your nose at him, frustrated, “you could at least tell me you love me.”
“Love you?!?” He chokes and nearly drops the cookie.
“Yes, I know you do, because I would never give my virginity to someone who doesn't love me.”
He blanches and glimpses down at the cookie. His throat bobs. He raises his eyes and takes another deep breath, “I didn't realise…”
“That you love me, right?” You sneer as you step closer, “say it.”
“If I do, will you go?” He growls.
You nod and smile up at him, “I'll do whatever you want, pookie.”
‘Pookie… jesus, alright, I love you. Go home.” He nudges you out of his way and grabs the door with his free hand.
“Don't eat those all at once,” you call as you turn to peek inside the club, “oh, and you have crumbs in your mustache–”
The door slams between you and you pout, “love ya too…” you trail off. It's okay, it seems like it's new for him too.
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heartofwritiing · 1 year
Note
jack russell unable to control himself from smelling you
idc how or why just pls make it happen
Your scent
paring: Jack Russell x fem!reader
a/n: So many jack requests! im so happy you all want me to write for him! bare with me though i’m still trying to figure out how to write him since he’s kinda a new character and he only has so much screen time to go off of! also its crazy how we all collectively were like omg yes during that scene… buy me a coffee
warning(s): just short, jack being kinda cuddly, werewolf smelling lol, and fluffy!! unedited!
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Jack had stoped in his tracks when his nose caught smell of something nearby. It was sweet and filled his lungs with a smoothness when he inhaled again.
It was coming from his bedroom. He wanders to the door and opens it to see you sitting on the armchair, curled up with a book as the rain falls down the window. He admires you for a moment, looking so comfortable and at peace in your own little world. Then he realizes the sweet smell is coming from over where you are.
Jack moves closer until he’s standing over you and you’re so caught up in your book that you’re startled when you feel his presence come up behind you. You look up at him frowning as he leans down to you.
“Jack?” you say.
When he reaches you close enough that his nose is touching the top of your head he inhales. You were used to this especially the days following his transformation. The wolf would still linger in his human form after a full moon phase, and sometimes it would show. Like you would catch little things he’d do; scratching behind his ears in a dog like manner, or in this case smelling you like a scratch n sniff and being a needy and cuddly. You thought it was cute.
He continues to sniff through your hair frantically so you say his name again.
“Did you change your shampoo?” he asks.
“Yes, why? do you not like it?” you shift in your seat to face him. If the smell bothered him too much due to his heightened senses or he didn’t like it because of the scent then you would have to find some other type. He immediately sensed your uneasiness.
“No, no, it’s lovely.” he expresses kneeling down to sit on his knees so he could meet your eye level. “I actually, really like it.” he confesses shyly.
You grin up at him the worry flowing away from you and giggle. Oh thank havens it doesn’t bother him. “you do?” He nods.
“It’s very nice, what is the scent I can’t quite place it.” He tilts his head to place a kiss on your forehead but not before smelling your hairline again. You giggle again at the absurdity of all this.
“It’s lavender,”
You feel his lips hum against your skin in delight. Your book is long forgotten as you let Jack pamper you with kisses. It was a little strange having your boyfriend smell you, but it made him happy and calmed his inner wolf so it didn’t matter to you.
“wait, there's something else,” he moves further down to your neck and moves your hair out of the way with a quick brush of his hand. His hot breath fans against the nape of your neck, and he inhales the fragrance there.
“Is it honey?”
“mhm, and oat.” you tell him.
“I apologize if this is strange mi querida…” he looks down awkwardly as he pulls back from your body. You knew Jack could be insecure about these things, after all it really wasn’t his fault. it was just his way of remembering you as well. You reach your hand up to cup his cheek and persuade him to look back at you.
“It isn’t strange, I wouldn’t be here If I couldn’t handle you smelling me.” you assure. as you speak your hand drifts behind his head to pet his hair in a comforting manner. He relaxes. “I know you can’t help the urges sometimes.”
He smiles at you affectionately and you can see his love for you in just a simple gaze and it makes your heart beat quicker.
“What did I do to deserve you my flor,”
Suddenly Jack is scooping you in his arms and carrying you bridle style all while you’re laughing. He lays you down into the covers on his bed and slides in next to you.
“My Flower?” you lift an eyebrow when you both settle into bed.
“It is fitting, no?” he pulls you closer to his chest. “because you’re like my own flower.” He sighs into your collarbone and you both lay there in bed enjoying each other’s presence.
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