i think one of my favorite genres of swatch/swatchling fanart is just

just them chatting to a much larger bird butler who is listening dutifully, following them around as they list off numerous things to do that day

Short Fuse and High Maintenance ✰ YakuLev

Genre: fluff, getting together

Words: 4,328

Summary: A few months passed with Lev on the team and at this point, Yaku was convinced that Lev was sent here to continuously make him feel small. Of course, Lev had never meant it in an offending way and somehow, that made it even worse. This way, Yaku didn’t only have to deal with the spite he felt from a fucking giant calling him short, he also had to deal with this weird tingling feeling in his heart that made his ears burn a little bit red.

Everything started on the day Lev first stepped into Nekoma’s gym for his first volleyball practice and caught sight of that one very short player. The third-year libero, Yaku Morisuke. Lev’s first impression of him was very simple: small. At that time, he hadn’t known yet how much that single fact would affect him and make a mess of his thoughts.

Haiba Lev, being a very tall person had, of course, seen small people. Actually, most people he’d encountered could be considered smaller than him. There was nothing to be surprised at in Yaku’s case either, especially since his amazing receiving skills definitely made up for his height on the court. Lev loved everything that was small and cute ever since he was a child. He would often feed the cats and dogs in the neighborhood or play with the children. He was very good with children and children liked him a lot too. They loved sitting on his shoulders to see the world from a higher point of view and just simply having one more playmate.

Becoming a regular member of the volleyball team taught Lev three things: his spiking teacher and setter, Kenma is impatient and reluctant to practice with him; his blocking teacher and captain, Kuroo is annoying and keeps nagging his ear off; his receiving teacher, Yaku is not only short but also has a short fuse. Lev honestly hated receiving practices, it was way too exhausting to keep running from one side of the court to the other and continuously dive for the ball. Yaku’s steadily reverberating scolding and yelling didn’t make it better either. Lev sneaked out not once when his senpai wasn’t paying attention. In the end, Lev concluded that not all small things were lovely and cute.

=^.^=

Yaku Morisuke could feel it deep in his guts the very first time he’d met Lev. It was a very intense boiling feeling that he couldn’t quite place at that time. He’d known it was triggered by his first impression on Lev: annoyingly tall half Russian towering over him to accentuate how small Yaku actually was. Yaku hated feeling small. He did all he could to make people focus on his high-quality receiving skills instead of his height and reveled in the fact that there were smaller players on the court as well. For example, Hinata Shouyou from Karasuno. Hinata was actually a whole centimeter shorter than Yaku and a middle blocker where height was the most important quality. Seeing him, Yaku didn’t seem all that special.

His feeling of disdain had only grown after he started to practice together with Lev. God, he sucked at everything so much... but he still kept running around shouting that he’d become the ace of Nekoma earning an earful from Yamamoto.

“Shut up and drag your ass back to receiving,” Yaku yelled at him, grabbing him by the back of his shirt and dragging him to the other side of the court. He cursed himself internally for not being able to reach his ear to drag him by that. Stupid tall bastard.

A few months passed with Lev on the team and at this point, Yaku was convinced that Lev was sent here to continuously make him feel small.  

“Yaku-san, you’re so good at volleyball even though your small?”

“Is Hinata really smaller than you?”

“Yaku-san, you’re so small and cute.”

Of course, Lev had never meant it in an offending way and somehow, that made it even worse. This way, Yaku didn’t only have to deal with the spite he felt from a fucking giant calling him short, he also had to deal with this weird tingling feeling in his heart that made his ears burn a little bit red. That pair of sparkling eyes always held such sincerity in them that Yaku hardly could think that Lev was making fun of him. A tiny thought bloomed in the back of his mind: maybe, just maybe this guy actually liked his height?  

Yaku crushed this ridiculous thought, kicked Lev on the butt and refused to even look at the pouting man. What’s there to like about height anyways?

=^.^=

Lev’s first impression on Yaku Morisuke took a 360° turn after a few months passed. It changed from small and adorable to little and aggressive then back to small and adorable. He’d come a full circle only because Yaku’s passion for volleyball and his blunt nature scared Lev at first. He needed a few weeks to get used to it and realize that even though Yaku seemed to harbor some kind of grudge against him, his sharp words were never meant to harm Lev, only to help him improve for the sake of the team. The kicks and the punches he received were all things he could thank his own big mouth for. His teammates kept telling him over and over again to quit pointing out Yaku’s height if he wanted to live but he couldn’t help himself. That man, 2 years older than him, so self-conscious about a quality that only made him more charming in Lev’s eyes, was someone Lev could never control himself around.

It was all because Lev’s brain worked in the simplest way. When he saw something that he liked, he couldn’t help but compliment it. And god, did he like Yaku Morisuke a lot...

An unexpected phone call was the catalyst that deepened and secured just how much Lev actually liked the libero. He could neither expect or foresee it, much less stop it before everything had already escalated to the point of no return.

The caller was Lev’s older sister, Alisa who announced that she would come and live in Japan for a few months. Lev was very excited to see his sister and even more excited to introduce her to his teammates. He was super proud of his sister being a successful and beautiful model, and he wanted to show off his newly learned volleyball skills too. So, Lev invited Alisa to their upcoming game and made her meet his team at the entrance of the stadium.

Everything proceeded smoothly.

“Hello, I’m Haiba Alisa. Thank you for always taking care of Lyovochka,” Alisa greeted the Nekoma members and the members had their jaw on the floor.

“No way, is this your sister?” Yamamato had already hearts in his eyes.

“She is! Doesn’t we look very similar?” Lev asked, standing proudly by Alisa’s side, both of them smiling.

“Hm,” Kuroo nodded. “I guess you have some shared genes.”  

“She's prettier than Lev, though,” Kenma concluded and the whole team agreed as if Kenma’s words were law.

Lev pouted while Alisa laughed, feeling happy that his brother was getting along so well with his teammates. His gaze swept through his cheerful teammates before it finally landed on the small form of the libero he’d lately always kept in a corner of his vision. Yaku was currently staring at the pair of siblings with barely visible pink dusting his cheeks. Suddenly, his eyes met Lev’s and with a slight but sudden widening of them, he turned away completely. Lev’s eyes widened at the same time and a weird fluttering feeling spread in his heart and his stomach like a hundred butterflies taking flight at once.

Lev almost forgot that fleeting moment of locked eyes and flushed cheeks until Alisa came to cheer for them at another game.  

“Alisa-san came again?” Yaku rushed up to Lev, asking with sparkling eyes and the faint pink hue once again present on his cheeks. “She’s really too beautiful.”

Lev furrowed his brows, quickly making the connection between the flustered state of the libero and his sister’s presence. In the end, he only rubbed the back of his neck and laughed, “I know right. Let’s make sure to win today, Yaku-san!"

Yaku nodded, “Just try not to get in the way of the receives when you block.”

“Yaku-san...” Lev whined as the both of them ran up to line for the start.

The flushing and blushing, along with Yaku being uncharacteristically excited certainly didn’t help Lev tone his adoration down. If anything, it only sparked a thousand wishful scenarios inside the tall boy’s head. It seemed as if a whole new world opened for him, and the urge to never stop observing the short libero only increased.

If only he would receive half the attention of what Yaku blessed his sister with…  

=^.^=

Yaku seemed to not really look into Lev’s eyes. That made sense, he probably didn’t want to strain his neck looking up but Lev still imagined what it would feel like to have those sparkling brown eyes bore into his own, focusing on him and nothing else. Yaku-san's cheeks seemed to be round and delicate, they would probably fit nicely into Lev’s palms. Lev imagined pale skin warming up and changing shades under his touch until it became hot and red, a pair of lips awaiting to meet them with his own in a soft kiss-

Lev shook his head furiously to dissolve the mental image that strayed into dangerous territories. Yaku gave him a weird look, “Are you even listening to me?”

Lev’s only response was an awkward laugh, followed by Yaku’s exasperated sigh.

“I guess we should call it a day.”

“Sorry, Yaku-san,” Lev mumbled guiltily, walking after his receiving tutor out of the gym and into the clubroom to change.

“It’s fine. I didn’t expect to stay until this late, either,” Yaku said, doing everything in his power to keep his turned backside to Lev but he still couldn’t conceal a faint blush making its way into the tall boy’s view.

Lev rubbed his eyes, thinking that he must be really exhausted. His sister was nowhere in sight but Yaku-san was still blushing, that couldn’t be anything more than his mind playing games with him. He proceeded to change out of his sweaty practice clothes as fast as possible, thinking about a nice mind-clearing shower and some refreshing sleep at home.

However, something even more unexpected happened.

Yaku stopped in his tracks when they exited the school grounds and turned to look up at Lev, “Hey, wanna stop by the convenience store? I’ll treat you to ice cream.”

Lev’s eyes widened in absolute disbelief, feeling his insides burst from happiness. “Yaku-san!”

“W-what? If you don’t want to, that’s fine too. Just thought you’ve been working hard lately...” Yaku immediately averted his eyes, making wide movements with his arm to punctuate to the best of his abilities that this was not a big deal and there was no reason for Lev to be this happy. But Lev was even more happy because he knew very well that Yaku, although a very dependable senpai, wasn’t the type to just treat others to ice cream or anything else.

Lev caught one of Yaku’s flailing arms, his long fingers circling around the thin wrist. “I’d like that very much.”

“Th-then let’s go,” Yaku said, half mumbling the words, the blush creeping up on his cheeks again and not escaping Lev’s watchful eyes.

“Okay!”

The short walk to the convenience store down the street was spent in the quiet of the night. Lev’s head was so full of the confused happiness that overwhelmed him that somehow, he even forgot to speak, not filling up the silence with his usual chitchats. His eyes fluctuated between the road ahead and the short boy beside him, their gazes meeting every once in a while, before Yaku forcefully ripped away his.

They arrived too fast to Lev’s liking and Yaku sprinted inside, speedily navigating to where the ice creams were kept. It didn’t take long before he exited the store and offered one of the two ice creams to Lev with a bright smile on his face. “Here. Keep up the good work.”

“Thank you!” Lev accepted the treat, savoring the feeling of their fingers brushing together for the entirety of two seconds.  

Eating the ice cream with Yaku next to him giving him warm looks, the tiniest of smiles and well-earned compliments, Lev had two conclusions:

Hard work does indeed pay off and if this is his reward for holding out on Yaku-san's demonic training then it was all worth it, without a doubt.

Yaku-san is the most adorable human being in the world and if he can’t have him, he doesn’t want anyone else.

=^.^=

Yaku deeply regretted treating Lev for ice cream that night. Who would have thought that this would happen? All he wanted was to increase Lev’s motivation and to not have that look full of dread on his face whenever an extra receiving practice began. That’s the only reason why he willed himself to ask Kuroo Tetsurou with his shit-eating grin for advice on how to achieve that.

“Yakkun, have you ever heard of the stick and carrot method?”

“Please, say it so non-nerds can understand too,” Yaku replied even though he had a feeling of what Kuroo was implying already.

“I’m saying that you shouldn’t just scold him when he messes up but also give him rewards when he does well.”

Yaku groaned internally, a frown making itself present outwardly.

“Come on, Yakkun, it’s not that difficult to give the guy a few compliments. It’s not like you gotta confess your undying love,” Kuroo joked but the chuckle got caught in his throat when he saw Yaku’s wide eyes and flushed cheeks before they turned into angry pools of storm.

“Who would confess anything to that idiot...”

“You’re welcome!” Kuroo shouted after him as Yaku stomped out of the clubroom. “Huh, I didn’t expect that he cares about Lev this much.”

Kenma lifted his eyes from his game to look at Kuroo, “I give them one month.”

“Bet.”

To give Kuroo some credit, Lev did become more enthusiastic about practice after the ice cream reward. However, Yaku did not expect him to become this enthusiastic.

Lev arrived on time, didn’t try to slack off or escape and paid great attention to each and every word Yaku had said to him. His bright emerald eyes bore into Yaku with an unfamiliar intensity, making it difficult for Yaku to stay collected and not stumble over his words.  

He had no idea what went through the titan’s head but not only the attention, the physical contact had also increased. Usually, Lev would run off and bother Kenma for tosses to polish his spikes for which he needed to sacrifice his break time in order to convince Kenma (with the help of the coaches and the captain). Lately, Lev reserved a seat next to Yaku, sitting always in close proximity, thighs, shoulders and fingertips often brushing together. It never ceased to ignite a small fire in Yaku’s chest, making the heat spread all the way to his cheeks where it burned in pink. Yaku felt that every time he blushed because of Lev, he’d lost a piece of his honorable senpai image.

Well, not that Lev had ever cared about his senpai image, he’d always talked back to him and continuously called him short. Yaku was pretty sure that Lev had no respect for him whatsoever.

...On second thought, this statement didn’t feel quite correct. Because even though Lev rarely listened to him in the way Yaku had wanted him to, Lev never crossed any lines and always looked at him with nothing but pure admiration.  

Yaku felt his cheeks warm up at the thought again and squeezed his hands in a tight fist, feeling the overwhelming need to punch someone. Preferably the cause of his state. Preferably in the face.  

Of course, he’d spent quite a lot of time thinking about why his initial reaction to everything related to Lev was violence but the result only pissed him off more. Dreadful words of ‘confess’ and ‘undying love’ coming from his latest conversation with Kuroo popped up in his mind, and his rage changed targets, now very much wishing to punch the captain.  

Stupid Kuroo saying stupid things, implying that Yaku was in love with a stupid giant who kept making him feel all kind of stupid feelings. However, Yaku felt the stupidest out of them all for actually considering the idea quite often lately.  

Sometimes, he would catch himself staring at Lev without realizing it and even after realizing, he would keep on looking at the way his expression brightened when he nailed a spike, saved a ball or blocked a shot. It was even more interesting to see him get frustrated when he messed up, screaming but immediately focusing on the next rally. Yaku felt his chest tighten and a smile creeping onto his face at the same time. And the worst, the absolute worst was after practice! When Lev was spread out on the floor as if he was dead after the coach dismissed everyone and Yaku would approach Lev while wiping his face with a towel. He had no idea what had gotten into him but his hand moved against his own will and patted the disheveled silver hair. Lev looked up in shock and the moment their eyes locked, both of them froze. Both of their cheeks were pink but only Lev could see it grace Yaku’s turned face while the libero stood up, removed his hand and lightly poked Lev’s side with his foot.  

“Get up, don’t lie on the floor,” he spat out mechanically and walked away as fast as he could without appearing suspicious. He hated to admit it to even himself so he sure as hell would never admit anything about his maybe existing feelings to the boy himself.  

=^.^=

Now, Lev was not the brightest lightbulb in the bunch but when it came to Yaku, he was prompt to notice a change in attitude. Unfortunately, the conclusion he got from this simple observation was not quite correct.  

Lately, it seemed that Yaku was being more distant around him. There was less scolding and less hits and kicks attacking him but that also meant less physical contact. Lev felt somewhat weird for thinking about how he missed Yaku-san’s small fist punching his sides but this train of thought quickly geared him towards memories that made a lot more sense. Shoulders leaning against each other while resting, fingers brushing together while a reward of ice cream was passed, warm fingers combing through his hair after a long day of practice…  

Lev raised a hand, touching his hair for himself and feeling a strange kind of loneliness. He didn’t know why Yaku patted his head that day but he would sell his soul to only have that hand rest on top of his head again. There was just something about the short boy touching the top of this tall boy that felt more encouraging and comforting than any words could ever make him feel.

“If you don’t focus then stop wasting my time,” Kenma’s annoyed grumble and a volleyball fallen to the floor and rolling away brought Lev out of the maze of his thoughts. The maze of Yaku, we might as well call it by name. He had no idea that the smallest distance would make him miss the previous affection so much. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen Yaku anymore, only that there was no more talking and interaction aside from practice. Missing someone right beside him was definitely not normal.  

Lev sighed, “Sorry, Kenma-san.”

Kenma stared at Lev’s slouched form, observant eyes seeing right through him and he sighed as well, “What’s wrong?”

Seeing Lev straighten up and his cheeks darkening confirmed Kenma’s suspicion. “Yaku-san?”

“I-I mean,” Lev stammered, trying not to give his feelings away which was highly difficult when Kenma’s scrutinizing gaze felt like he was completely naked. “He seems like he’s avoiding me. But he’s practicing with me as usual so it might just be me...”

“Oh,” Kenma said, glancing at Yaku practicing with Kuroo and Yamamoto before he made a decision.  

“W-what?” Lev felt very uneasy.  

“Do you like Yaku-san?”

“Wha- I… H-how did you know?”

“I didn’t know. You just told me,” Kenma pointed out then added when he saw Lev’s horrified expression. “But I kinda guessed already. You’re super obvious.”

“Do you think Yaku-san noticed something and this is why he’s avoiding me?”

“I’m sure he noticed something but I doubt it’s how you feel…” Kenma rolled his eyes. It almost pained him how these two were so focused on their own feelings that they failed to notice the other struggling with the exact same feelings. Maybe he could give them a little push, he thought, he had a bet to win, after all. 

Lev tilted his head in confusion, “What do you mean?”

“Have you ever thought that he might like you too?”

=^.^=

Lev ran through the streets excitedly, a sense of urgency in his steps. He hoped that he would still be able to catch up to Yaku. He didn’t even dare to think about reciprocated feelings before but Kenma’s words sparked hope in his heart. Kenma would never comfort anyone with empty words so with encouragement from Kenma, he felt like he had the support of the entire universe behind him.  

“Yaku-san!” he called out when he spotted the small figure passing in front of the convenience store near the school. He locked eyes with the surprised libero. Lev strode over, crossing the distance with a few long strides and towered over Yaku. Yaku despised when anyone, especially Lev of all people, towered over him and he didn’t hesitate to insert his palm into the stupidly tall person’s side.

“What’s wrong with you?” he asked with a frown.

Lev clutched his painful side, the sparkles in his eyes not at all subsiding as they bore into Yaku. “Yaku-san, do you like me?”

Yaku was taken aback by the bluntness of the question, completely speechless for a moment before finding his voice again. “Did you hit your head? Why would I like you? You can’t even make a proper block.” He didn’t mention his spikes. Yaku had to admit, he got a lot better at those, scoring important points for the team.

“No, that’s not what I mean. Do you like like me?”

“...” Yaku had a bad feeling about the persistent questioning. “Why are you even asking me that?”

“Yaku-san, please, answer me.”

He knows. Yaku had half a mind to punch him with all of his might and run away if that’s the only way he could get out of this mess. How could this be possible? Lev was way too oblivious to realize the affections masked behind yelling. Yaku swore to murder whoever ratted him out. Kuroo, he was sure of it. That bastard always enjoyed messing with him.

“What if I do?” he glared at Lev, trying not to let the embarrassment show on his face and daring the tall man to make fun of him.

It was as if a thousand fireworks went off in Lev’s mind, he radiated excited happiness as he got closer to Yaku. “Because I like you too! I really really like you, Yaku-san!”  

Yaku looked at him like he was crazy. Why would this guy like him? That made no sense to him. He did nothing but yell at him, scold him, kick his butt, punch his side, slap his head... Yaku didn’t know if he should feel relieved that he was liked despite his horrendous treatment or just stupefied because was this guy a masochist or what?

“Are you stupid?” Was the only thing that ended up coming out of Yaku.

Lev didn’t even hear it. “I’m so happy you feel the same way. Sometimes, I thought you really hated me but then you would stare at me like that so I was kind of confused. Ah, I’m soooo happy now.”

Yaku blinked. How did he exactly stare at Lev? Shit, had he been caught? That’s too embarrassing, he wished he could poke out his own eyes. Lev continued rambling but Yaku’s mind went completely blank as he tried and failed to assess this situation.

“Yaku-san, can I kiss you?”

“Huh?!” Lev’s face was suddenly way too close and Yaku’s heartbeat sped up while a blush spread onto his cheeks. He unconsciously covered his face with an arm. “Aren’t you getting way too ahead of yourself here? Shouldn’t you ask if I want to be your boyfriend first?”

Lev’s eyes softened. He gently pried Yaku’s arm away from his face and smiled at the pretty pink blush on his face. Cute. Yaku was really too cute. It was impossible to resist.

“But we like each other. And I really want to kiss you right now. Don’t you?”

The question sounded innocent coming from him but for Yaku’s ears it held a teasing tone and mixed feelings dueled in his mind. He did want to kiss Lev. God knows how many times he imagined how his lips would feel against his but he would rather die than to say it and since he’s too short for a surprise kiss, he decided to die without ever getting the experience.

However, his head ended up nodding. He actually nodded! This simple gesture shocked both Lev and himself. Fortunately, he didn’t have the time to be embarrassed about it because Lev’s lips landed on his almost instantly. It was a short kiss, innocent and sweet and lighting up both of their faces with bliss and blush.  

“Yaku-san,” Lev smiled when he pulled away. “Would you be my boyfriend?”

Yaku’s blush deepened until his face was the same color as his Nekoma jacket. “Y-yeah, I guess we’re dating now…”

“Yay, I’ll make you happy, I promise!” Lev was beside himself with excitement and instantly wrapped up Yaku in his arms, finally feeling the satisfaction of holding his own little happiness and he swore to himself that he would never let him go.  

reddie+21?

21. best friends sibling au

Read on A03

Entering the Uris home was equivalent to walking on the moon.  Very little have done it and doing so was a life changing event. Richie entered on eggshells, following so close to his friend that he ended up bumping into his backpack when he stopped to pull off his shoes. Stan shot him an annoyed look, rolling his eyes and muttering profanity under his breath. The place was nice, smaller than his own home but much, much cleaner. It was like everything was in its place, even dust not daring to enter without permission. A sweet scent of Lysol mixed with clean laundry wafted back into them.

“Hey Stanley, who is your friend?” Someone asked from the kitchen, the bar blocking RIchie’s view but he assumed it was Rabbi Uris.

“Dad, this is Richie.” Stan introduced, vaguely motioning to his friend. “We have a project to do for school.”

“Well it must be important, you hardly ever bring your friends over.”

That was no kidding. In the four years of their friendship Richie had never been inside of Stan’s home. It wasn’t that he hadn’t asked-the trashmouth notorious for barging into people’s lives-it was that Stan refused to let him in. When they hung out it was at his or Bill’s house, when there was a project it was the library or Richie’s room. Never. Ever. The Uris home. However when their senior project came due and the library was closed for training the same day the Tozier’s were entertaining family there was no other choice. Needless to say, Stan was not happy about it.

Sighing, Stan replied. “Yeah, I know. We will be upstairs if you need us.”

“Alright, you kids have fun.” Mr. Uris shouted as they ascended up the stairs.

Stan’s room was cold, that was the first thing Richie noticed. A shiver ran down his spine, making the hairs on his arm stand on end. There was a blue tint to everything, blue curtains, bed sheets and walls. It was so clean that it made the front room look like a wreck and Richie’s room like a dump truck. Even the pencils on the desk were in parallel lines, the comforter had folded creases for god sakes. Richie was impressed.

“Nice room.” Richie whistled.

“Shut up.” Stan snapped, putting his bag onto the ground and opening it. “I don’t want to hear your jokes.”

“Jokes? Jokes about what?”

“About how my room is super clean, how it’s like obsessive and weird and creeps you out.” There was a slight pinch to his voice, catching Richie off guard. “This is why I don’t bring you over, you always make fun of me for being put together and this place is where I can me myself so if you tease me for the way I am at school then I knew it would be a thousand times worse if you were in my home. I mean I have OCD for god’s sake what did you think it was gonna be like when you-”

“I don’t care what your room looks like.” Richie cut, his heart tugging at the small tears that had suddenly began to pool in Stan’s tear ducts. “I wouldn’t make fun of you for anything like that, I’m your friend. I can’t believe you thought I was that horrible.”

“Wel I-” Stan sputtered, turning away and placing books onto his bed. “I’m sorry, just thought since you were the king of jokes that you would-”

“Apology accepted.” Richie smirked, patting his friend on his back so hard that Stan jerked forward. “Now lets knocked out this project eh? Gotta get an A so that I can get into a good school I do.” He finished in a horrible british voice, lighting up the tension and putting some good vibes into the thick air.  

Stan scoffed, “That was the worst voice yet Rich.”

“You love it.”

The Uris boy smiled, actually smiled as he sat down onto the ground, motioning Richie to do the same. They fell into a dull sequence, writing and reading about their topic as a comfortable prence spread between them. It was like this sometimes, with Richie making subtle jokes and Stan scorning him for doing so. Just two friends doing their best to graduate, the project being a huge factor in doing so.

About two hours later there was a loud slam from the room next to them, followed by the blaring lyrics of a familiar rock band. It was so unlike the aesthetic of the household that Richie looked up from his book and stared at wall, trying to see through it to get a peek. “Hey Stan?” He asked, earning a small hum. “Uh what is that?”

“Probably Metallica or something.” Stan shrugged. “Eddie’s been turned on to them thanks to some girl at his school.” He sounded so annoyed, his nose turning upward in disgust.

“No, I uh-got that.” He grumbled, motioning to the band shirt he was sporting. “Who in the hell is Eddie?”

“My brother.”

“Brother?”

Stan finally looked up from the paper in his lap, frowning. “Yeah, well-no not biologically. We finished the legal work last year but he’s been living us for about three.”

Richie nearly choked, “You have never told me you had a brother.”

“I’m sure I have.”

“No.”

“Once, you probably weren’t listening.”

“I think I would remember Stanley.” Richie growled, shooting him a knowing glare. “How have I never met him? Is he like older or something?”

“No, same age.”

“Oh my god.” He griped, rubbing his face in frustration. “Does go to Derry high too? Have you been hiding him in your locker or something?”

“No, he goes to the private school. Got a full ride for running track.”

Richie shot up, “I’ve got to meet him.”

“No!” Stan shouted, grabbing his wrist to still him. “Okay you’re right, I’ve never told you but it’s because you have a reputation for being a horn dog and Eddie’s been through a lot of shit.”

“Now I’ve got to meet him if you think I’d bang him.” Richie said, a need for satisfaction-that  would only come from meeting the secret brother he didn’t know Stan had-bubbling in his stomach. “He must be hot as fuck.”

“Richie, you can’t meet him. Just let it go.” Stan warned, standing to his full height. Although he was inches shorter, he towered over the trashmouth. “I’m not going to tell you again.”

“Stan, Stanley, Stannybear.” Richie cooed, “I’m your best friend-”

“No you’re not, Bill is.”

“-And as your best friend I should reserve the right of meeting your brother!” It was kind of a long shot but he would do just about anything to see this super attractive track star. “I won’t say anything embarrassing if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Stan snorted, “You, Richie Tozier, are a walking talking embarrassment.”

“You wound me Stan!” He faked gasped, clutching his chest. “Your words, they are like daggers in my heart!”

“Richie!”

“Stanley!”

Their arguing voices were silenced by the sound of a clearing throat in the doorway. Both boys turned, finally noticing the person that was leaning against the frame. Richie gapped, taking him in all at once as his brain stilled for the first time in his life. Eddie was wearing sweats that hung low on his hips, his white t-shirt a too little snug against his defined abdomen creating a small line of flesh that was visible just below his navel. His face was soft, freckles dusted along his nose and cheeks, making Richie want to reach out and connect them like stars. With brown hair and doe eyes, it made sense that Stan wanted to keep him hidden from Derry High’s most eligible bachelor. Shit, Richie wanted to jump his bones right then and there.

“Your dad wants to know if your friend is going to stay for dinner.” Eddie said, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“No.” Stan said.

“Yes!” Richie shouted over him.

Eddie raised his eyebrow, pursing his lips and staring at the both of them in what could only assume was amusement. “Yeah, I’m just gonna tell him maybe.”

“No, Eddie don’t-” But Stan was waved off and ignored as his brother turned heel and left, leaving the spot where Richie was staring. Instinctively the trashmouth went to follow like a love struck puppy, following Eddie’s scent of irish spring and lavender. He was stopped when a hand grasped the back of his shirt, keeping him from going too far. “Oh hell no, I don’t think so.”

“Stan-”

“Off limits.” He hissed, tugging him backwards. “Understand.”

“What? That’s not fair, he’s like an angel. A sexy, well defined angel!”

“You’re my best friend Richie.” Stan said, taking his friend by surprise. “And as my best friend, Eddie is off limits. You aren’t allowed to pursue him, to get sweet on him or any of that stuff you pull on the girls at school. You have to promise me Richie.”

“But-”

“Promise.”

Richie sighed, relaxing a little. “Promise.”

“Good.” Stan nodded, sitting back down onto the floor. “Now let’s get this done before it gets to late.”

The trashmouth sat back down, unable to pry his eyes from the doorway as his friend began to pull the books back out. Stan was talking but Richie couldn’t hear a single word because right then Eddie walked past the open space, pausing for a second to smile and wink right at him. Richie’s heart fluttered, his eyes widening and mouth dropping open. This made Stan’s brother chuckle before he kept on his path and disappeared down the hall.

“Fuck.” Richie groaned.

568

Have you ever had a really bad haircut? I haven’t had any truly awful ones. The only time I felt ‘meh’ about a haircut was when I went to the salon on my own and told the hairdresser what I wanted myself. I was never good at that kind of stuff, and always prefer being with someone so they can tell me if I’m headed somewhere good or otherwise. Did you ever order any clothes from the Alloy catalogue? I’ve never heard of that. What brand, color, and type is your favorite eyeliner? I’ve only ever used eyeliner at one point in my life and I’ve forgotten every detail about it. It was black, though. Do you wear eyeliner? I used to. I wanted to look nice post-breakup, so I learned how to do makeup to feel good about myself. Was there ever a time in your life when you couldn't cry? I guess when I have HAD to cry in the past, as in for a skit, I couldn’t. But I can be triggered and cry very easily otherwise.

What's your favorite type of yogurt? I hate yogurt, I hate everything that’s sour (except for sour tapes, but even those I can only handle at a certain level of sourness haha). What posters did you have on your wall as a teenager? Wrestling. My mom took them down for no reason eventually, even though I loved having them up on my wall. What are your favorite type of calendars? I mean I don’t obsess over calendars enough to have a favorite type? so a digital one on my phone and laptop is fine with me. I do sometimes wish I was rich enough just to be able to spend on those novelty calendars with Audrey Hepburn photos and Monet paintings in every month, though. Do you have a full-length mirror? I used to but it got transferred to my sister’s room. I don’t mind it though; I don’t use mirrors all that much. When was the last time you bought stamps? Elementary school, probably. Do you have any overdue library books right now? HAH, yes I do actually. It was a book I needed to do a Powerpoint on, and I completely forgot that its due date was on the 4th. The fee is like ₱2/day so I’ll have to pay around ₱8 to ₱10 by next week, depending on when I’ll feel like returning the book. How often do you do laundry? I don’t; my mom prefers to do it herself. Do you have a piggy bank? Maybe as a kid, but I never took it seriously because I didn’t sit well with the fact that I couldn’t see the money I’ve been saving. I’ve stuck with a good old wallet ever since, just so I can know my progress. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? I don’t, actually. I wonder what numbers I used to secure my locks :o What's your favorite DIY crafts youtube channel? Aren’t a lot of those misleading and downright fake? Could you spend hours on pinterest? I’ve never spent more than five minutes at one time on that website/app. Do you own plaid pants? Nah, it’s not really my style. Have you ever had to wear a school uniform? I had to wear my school’s uniform for 14 straight years. All I ever wore Monday through Friday for that span of time. What was your high school's mascot? We don’t have a mascot; we just have school colors. What were your high school's team colors? Gold, white, blue. Who were your best friends in high school? Angela, Gabie, Athenna, and Sofie. Others I was close with were Chelsea, Kaira, and Fern. Who was your first boyfriend or girlfriend? Gab. Have you ever been to Chicago? Nope but it’s a dream. If yes, what do you like best about it? The FOOD, the culture, the museums. Have you ever stayed in a hostel? Nope, never been. Would you rather sleep on the top bunk or bottom bunk? Bottom. I wouldn’t like sleeping somewhere that felt unnatural, and lying down way high from the floor is definitely one of those things. Do you love camping? I’ve never tried, so I don’t know. Would you rather sleep in a tent or under the stars? Lie under the stars for as long as I can, then pass out in a tent. What insects are you afraid of? Cockroaches. Have you ever had a secret admirer that left you notes? I haven’t. Are you close with your cousins? I have a good relationship with most of my cousins, mom’s side; but I’m especially close with my eldest cousin, who I essentially view as my older brother. I’m so-so with cousins on my dad’s side - we were very close as kids, but they moved further to the south and I never really get to see them anymore, so we grew more shy as the years passed.  Are you close to any aunts or uncles? I love my mom’s cousins; they’re all younger than her and they’re mostly late Gen X-ers so they’re more hip and cool hahaha. I wouldn’t say we’re close but they are definitely much easier to talk to than other older relatives. Are you close to your grandparents? I seldom get to see my paternal grandparents because they live with the ^ same cousins I’ve since grown quite distant from, so I wouldn’t say I’m close to them but of course I love them all the same. I was very close with my maternal grandfather when he was still alive as I always knew what to do to make him laugh; and I am also crazy for my maternal grandmother, although in the last few years she’s been all about Jesus so sometimes it gets a little draining hearing about how I should always pray and that “God can answer all [my] problems.” Still love her loads, though. Who betrayed your trust? A friend did, many years ago. Who was your first best friend (apart from a sibling)? Bold of you to assume a sibling was my first best friend, because you’re wrong lol. I’d consider this girl we calle Kaye the first one; we were class number buddies in Kinder 1 (I was 4, she was 5) so we got close quickly. She changed schools by Grade 1 and I haven’t talked to her since, but I still remember her fondly. What was your favorite thing to do at sleepovers when you were younger? I was never allowed at sleepovers when I was a kid. What kind of popcorn is your favorite? Sweet-flavored ones. I could never take dry-ass plain/salted popcorn. It has to be something like salted caramel or parmesan. Does your town have a big fountain in it? If we do have one, I’ve never seen it. But I’m pretty sure we don’t. What is your town known for? For being on a mountain and being ridiculously hard to get to because 1) of its winding, accident-prone roads, and 2) IT’S ON A MOUNTAIN. I live in the area of Antipolo just before you start to go up, so I don’t get offended much by the complaints of everyone else; but I’m in solidarity nonetheless with the ~mountain-dwellers~ just because I used to go to school in upper Antipolo. Do you currently live in the city you grew up in? I mostly grew up in Antipolo, so yes I still live here. I did live in Manila in my early childhood but that time was much shorter than the time I’ve spent in my current city. What's one way in which you're behind the times? I hate Minecraft and I hate Fortnite even more. What's one way in which you're still a child? I love coloring books :) What's one way in which you're old? I have a bad back. Do you feel old or young? Or do you feel both at different times? Definitely feel a bit of both, depending on my mood. The perfect example could be that I can be annoyed seeing younger kids make so much noise, but the next day I can be exactly like those kids making a bunch of noise with my friends. How old are you? I am 21. Do you know what you want to do for your next birthday? No, not yet. Quite early to think about at this point, really. If yes, what is it? A private dinner would already sound perfect. What is the last new thing you discovered that was really good? Vaping. I mean don’t try it if you haven’t already, but yeah. What would be the best surprise you could receive right now? Tbh if my mom came home carrying a box of Yellow Cab pizza. AKA something that would NEVER happen; she snobs Yellow Cab cos she thinks they’re too expensive for pizza. Do you usually forgive when someone hurts your or try to get revenge? I get my revenge, subtly. Were there any subjects in school that were really easy for you? Our subject Language, which was mandatory back in elementary school, was literally basic English grammar. Not everyone in my former school spoke fluent English so a lot of them weren’t all that good at the subject; but for people like me who had a solid grasp of English and read a lot to begin with, the class was basically a breather from the other more difficult classes. If so, what? ^ I already told ya all about it. Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? Skipping grades isn’t a thing in my former school which is honestly a good thing for me cos it would have bred a lot of competition. But students would have to repeat a level if their grades showed that they had to; I wasn’t one of them. What time of day were you born? 9:11 in the evening. What is the best hairstyle you've ever had? I loved my layered hair like 10 years ago. It was probably the only time I did something to my hair that wasn’t just a trim, so I enjoyed that experience. I also liked cutting my hair way, way too short last year; it was a bold move but I liked how it look, as did everyone else. Do you think you look better with dyed hair or natural hair? I’ve never tried dyeing my hair so I wouldn’t know. Do you think your look better with curly hair or straight hair? Curly, I think. Do you have bangs? I have baby bangs but they’re just stubborn hair standing around my head lmao but no I don’t have actual bangs. Do you think you look better with bangs or without? I haven’t tried getting bangs as an adult. I did look cute with them as a toddler though :( Do you think you look better with long hair or short? Long. What's your favorite rock band? Paramore, if they still count. Who's your favorite country singer? None. Do you ever listen to Celtic music? No. Do you listen to Hillsong? No. Did you try the unicorn frappuccino, and if yes, were you a fan? No I never tried it. Have you ever won a contest? I won a school quiz bee and an essay writing contest before, but I wouldn’t call the latter legitimate. It was just a writing contest about wrestling held by a local TV station and the three best entries got to win WWE t-shirts haha. Have you ever wanted to be a model, actress, singer, or dancer? I wanted to be a model when I was like 12. No fucking clue what was going through my head at the time. When you look at your baby pictures, do you recognize yourself? Sure. Has your hair color changed since you were a toddler? Nope. Do you wear matching socks? Yes. How many drawers does your dresser have? Three. Do you own an American flag shirt? No thanks. Do you own a British flag shirt? I don’t. The Union Jack got overused by 2011 Tumblr, honestly. Do you have a seashell collection? I don’t. Aren’t we prohibited from getting those from beaches? That’s the case in the Philippines, anyway. Do you have a rock collection? I do not. Do you decorate for Halloween? We didn’t decorate the house but I celebrated it with friends this year. What is your favorite thing to do in the pool? Float around and relax. Flamingos or pineapples? ??? Flamingos, I guess? Cacti or seashells? Seashells. Maple tree or palm tree? Palm tree. Dreamcatcher or wind chimes? Dreamcatchers! Have you ever taken a picture at the perfect moment? I probably have at few points. Do you have a crush right now? Yes. What color was your first car? My first and current car is white. Was your first car used or new? I’m actually not sure. It was my dad who purchased it. Do you have a car now? Yep. What color(s) eyeshadow do you wear the most? I never wear any.

A Tag I Forgot to do a Month Ago

Tagged by @michimji

(Note: this on mobile and I don’t feel like making it pretty rn)

What was your last...

1. Drink: Moscow Mule (vodka, ginger beer, lots of lime)

2. Phone call: I was having a crisis, so I called a friend at 1 A.M.

3. Text: YEAH YOU STOP EM BOI

4. Song you listened to: “Unfinished” by Mandisa. Ironically, I did not get to finish this song

5. You cried: probs this week

Have you ever

6. Dated someone twice: I’ve never dated someone once sooooo

7. Been cheated on: nope

8. Kissed anyone and regretted: no

9. Lost someone special: yes but not to death

10. Been depressed: for like 10 years+

11. Been drunk and threw up: nah

List your three favorite colors

12. Black

13. Pink

14. Orange

In the last year have you

15. Made a new friend: lots!

16. Fallen out of love: the closest thing would be changing my ultimate bias from Mark to Chan

17. Laughed so hard that you cried: lots of times!

18. Met someone who changed you: YAS

19. Found out who your true friends are: yeah kinda

20. Found out someone was talking about you: of definitely

21. Kissed anyone on your Facebook list: ewwww

22. How many people do you know on your Facebook list: all of them? Like 300

Random

23. Do you have any pets: doggo named Nala

24. Do you want to change your name: kiiinda. I like my korean name the most, but my legal name is okay

25. What did you do for your last birthday party: Vietnamese food with friends

26. What time did you wake up this morning: 7:30

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: processing emotions with friends yaaay

28. Something you can’t wait for: moving back to school tomorrow

29. Last time you saw your mother: literally 2 minutes ago downstairs

30. One thing you wish you could change about your life: I’d like financial stability

31. What are you listening to rn: the sound of my mom washing dishes

32. Have you ever talked a ton: all the time if I’m comfortable with you

33. What’s getting on your nerves rn: the neighbor mowing their yard

34. Most viewed webpage: tumblr. Surprise surprise

35. Nickname: Lys/Lyssa (@morganowebb)

36. Relationship status: single and only slightly sad about it

37. Zodiac sign: Aquarius, rising Gemini, moon Leo (but only Aquarius is actually accurate to me)

38. College: Liberty University

39. Hair color: I just changed it and it’s some sort of mix between red, purple, and brown

40. Long or short: my hair? It’s not super long but it’s probably more medium than long

41. Height: 5’3”/160

42. Do you have a crush on someone: Chan?

43. What do you like about yourself: my eyes are pretty spiffy

44. Tattoos: I’m too poor and afraid of needles so none

45. Right or left handed: right

46. First piercing: standard lobe piercing

47. First best friend: a girl I met in kindergarten I think. Sara

48. First sport you joined: basketball in eighth grade

49. First vacation: I don’t even know tbh. Probably to go fishing on the Tennessee river

50. Eating: I haven’t eaten today yet so no

51. Drinking: I like water but haven’t drank today yet

52. About to: go stress about packing…or defeat Calamity Ganon. Can’t decide

53. Siblings: unless the dog or chosen siblings count, 0

Your future

54. Want kids: yeeesss???? I don’t know

55. Get married: I want to, but we’ll see what happens

56. Career: ESL teacher or Korean-English interpreter

Which is better (in a significant other)

57. Lips or eyes: eyes

58. Hugs or kisses: probably kisses but I wouldn’t really know

59. Shorter or taller: taller

60. Older or younger: older

61. Romantic or spontaneous: I need both because I am neither (but probably romantic. Spontaneity freaks me out if not done properly)

62. Nice stomach or arms: ARMS😍😍

63. Loud or sensitive: yes? I don’t know I associate loud with being obnoxious, but I have enough sensitivity for the both of us

64. Hook up or relationship: RELATIONSHIP

65. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

Have you ever

66. Kissed a stranger: nope. I mean I haven’t really kissed someone I know sooo

67. Drank hard liquor: I guess? Cuz vodka?

68. Lost glasses/contacts: lol all the time

69. Had sex on the first date: noooo. Do not want

70. Broken someone’s heart: I don’t know probably, but it definitely wasn’t on purpose

71. Been arrested: no I’m a good kid😇

72. Turned someone down: romantically? Haven’t had the chance. In friendships? Probably have but not very often

73. Cried when someone died: yes

74. Fallen for a friend: lol unfortunately yes

Do you believe in

75. Yourself: occasionally. Not as of late though

76. Miracles: yup

77. Heaven: yup

78. Santa Claus: nope

79. Kisses on the first date: you can do what you want, but for me personally I know I wouldn’t be near comfortable enough to kiss or be kissed by someone on a first date

80. Love at first sight: ehhhh. Infatuation at first sight? Yes. LOVE at first sight? Highly unlikely

entirely unasked for, read books 2017, first half.

Unter der Sonne (Daniel Kehlmann, 1998/2008): Daniel Kehlmann is, for now, my favourite germanspeaking writer (style-wise, no worries Fritz) and I started the year with reading some of his early works I hadn’t read yet. Unter der Sonne is a collection of short stories and as almost all of Kehlmanns narrations they are always very real but shifting into a dream, or it feels like it at least, always on the verge of a nightmare. one could call it surreal realism? or very real surrealism? it’s very hard to put into words but oh boy, I just love it so much. so I have already read Ruhm (Fame), a later collection of short stories and I liked the overall compilation of those more, especially because the stories were slightly linked to each other. But still Unter der Sonne was brilliant as ever! / English title: this has not been translated I think?

Der Verbrecher aus verlorener Ehre (Friedrich Schiller, 1786): this was… quite wild to say the least. / English title: The Criminal of Lost Honour

Du hättest gehen sollen (Daniel Kehlmann, 2016): I love this little novel. It’s definitely one of my favourites by Daniel Kehlmann. And i really need to reread it! The mathematics mysticism is strong in this one. Das Geodreieck! / English title: You should have left

Maria Stuart (Friedrich Schiller, 1800): i feel terrible but the best thing about this book, which i bought at the flea market, is still that it came with a self made book mark -a ladie’s leg in a pantyhose and a very fancy high heeled shoe, probably cut out from a magazine and strengthend with adhesive tape- which must be, judging by the look of it, at least 60 years old, if not older (the book is from 1939). but apart from that, I also liked the play itself! but it has already been several months and to say anything specific about it now I would have to ask Evelyn Hamann to give a short recap of the bisher gesendeten Folgen. “Auf dem Landsitz Fortheringhay…” 

Die Wahlverwandschaften (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1809): i was meaning forever to read this and it was so beautiful, and sad! :( not even to speak of the quite obvious Schiller parallels. :(( and also, if you ever decide to read Die Wahlverwandschaften, please do so while listening to Die Ballade von Wolfgang und Brigitte by Wir sind Helden! / English title:  Elective Affinities

Beerholms Vorstellung (Daniel Kehlmann, 1997): this was Daniel Kehlmann’s first novel and ironically the last left that I hadn’t read. Compared to later works it maybe wasn’t as strong and the style not as developped but still very, very good. It’s about a magician, that is illusionist, who isn’t satisfied with his own skills because he himself still is aware that it’s all just tricks and illusion and thus tries to master his tricks so perfectly and blindly that he can become oblivious to the procedure in order to become a Real Magician and in the progress partially loses grip of reality. I mean… that idea alone is fascinating.

Cornelia Goethe (Sigrid Damm, 1992): Sigrid Damm deserves a medal for writing honest, inspiring and heartwrenching biographies about people (esp. women) we know so very little about! 

Heinrich von Kleist (Dora Wentscher, 1956): this was a true lucky find at the flea market, I am still amazed. Oh Berndi!

Wallensteins Lager (Friedrich Schiller, 1798): this is merely a prologue to the other two parts of the Wallenstein triology so i really need to go on reading the other two (main) parts. / English title: Wallenstein’s Camp

Sprachwandel (Rudi Keller, 1990): How and that language changes is something that amazes me to no ends and I have been musing about that subject for years now but I have never actually read anything about it by someone who actually knows what they’re talking about. So it was amazing and interesting and I am (still) so thrilled by this. Language is like the most amazing yet inapprehensible thing ever?! / English title: On Language Change

Maurice (E. M. Forster, 1914/1971): this book stole my heart all over again after having seen the film already some years ago. like seriously, I am internally crying tears of joy ever since. please read this! it will not diasappoint, and Christopher Isherwood himself was a fanboy okay?

Goodbye to Berlin (Christopher Isherwood, 1939): talking of the devil-this book is amazing! it’s like a mosaicy glimpse into pre-nazi Berlin, or rather Berlin right before turning and already turning into nazi Berlin. despite all, this book made me want to be there myself with all these people.

Die Physiker (Friedrich Dürrenmatt, 1962): that was a weird and funny one. and not at all what I expected. I had always heard that even people who had to read it in school had liked it but apart from that knew nothing about it. / English title: The Physicists

Christopher and his kind (Christopher Isherwood, 1976): this is the non-fiction version of Christopher Isherwoods time in Berlin with its gay community. mainly, he is on the run from the nazis with his boyfriend Heinz. very sad and also a bit wild.

Winnie-the-Pooh (A. A. Milne, 1926): I might be identifying with Eeyore A Little Too Much. But really what a cute and clever book! (It made me think in Capitalised Expressions for days.)

The Importance of being Earnest (Oscar Wilde, 1895): i don’t know why i waited so long to read Oscar Wilde but omg, that was hilarious and amazing!!

Mr Norris Changes Trains (Christopher Isherwood, 1935): i didn’t enjoy this as much as Goodbye to Berlin and Christopher and his Kind, the entire story is somewhat sinister and the characters not really likeable somehow? but then I also read that Isherwood himself didn’t like it before i even started reading so I think I was also a bit biased. but it’s also very interesting to see how his style developped in contrast to the masterpiece I think Goodbye to Berlin is

Relato de un náufrago (Gabriel García Márquez, 1970): earlier this year I started reading Cien Años de Soledad (100 Years of Solitude) by García Márquez but stopped half way through because it confused the hell out of me and I somehow didn’t connect to the characters at all. I don’t know if it was for the Spanish or simply for the sheer amount of characters -of which half have the same name?!- and the large time span the novel is narrated on? anyway I wanted to give García Márquez another chance and picked something lighter, shorter and with less people - only one to be precise! And I enjoyed it very much! / English title: The Story of a Shipwrecked Sailor

Schillers Schwester Christophine (Annette Seemann, 2009): Christophine (Fene) was two years older than her little brother Fritz and since they both were much older than their younger siblings they were an inseparable duo in their childhood days. It is also said that Christophine’s character was a model for a lot, if not most, of Schiller’s female heroines. But as biographies about women in history go they can be a tough thing and this one makes no exception - to the point where it becomes almost unbearable! I got teary eyed reading this in the subway; but then I also might be caring about the Schillers A Little Too Much. / I highly doubt this has been transated.

Progress in Sign Language Research (Schulmeister/Reinitzer, 2002): blame (that is thank) Fargo and Russel Harvard that I suddenly became aware of how there’s an entire different set of languages to learn and learn about! The craziest thing was that while I was reading this very book (at work, sometimes there’s just not that much to do) an actual Deaf Person came to the cinema and asked if we were showing movies with english subtitles (which we don’t). That is he came up to me and said “deaf” and gestured writing in his hand and I then handed him a notepad on which we had our conversation. But everything happened so fast and there was another costumer waiting, and I was so taken aback, (I misspelled english as englisch how awkward!) but I had that book literally laying there next to me on the counter. I still wish I could have showed him. :/ I also regret not having been able to look up some cinemas for him that show movies with english subtitles. I hope he found one anyway!

A Room with a View (E. M. Forster, 1908): so after Maurice I wanted to read more by Forster and he did not disappoint! i had a lot of other stuff on my mind while reading this so it lost me a bit in the middle but totally got my attention back towards the end and i’m definitely going to reread this some day. and I simply cannot believe how wonderfully fantastical the Emersons are! although i’m yet to read Walden I am already contemplating putting “mistrust all enterprises that require new clothes” on my wardrobe as well-what a thing to do lmao! naturally I immediately watched the film after finishing the book and it was also nice seeing the entire Maurice cast again, only in different roles, haha!

books on my reading list for the second half of 2017: 

Hundraårigen som klev ut genom fönstret och försvann (Jonas Jonasson, 2009)

A Single Man (Christopher Isherwood, 1964)

Die Leiden des jungen Werther (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe,1774)

The House at Pooh Corner (A. A. Milne, 1928)

Of Mice and Men (John Steinbeck 1937)

A Manual for Cleaning Women (Lucia Berlin, 1977/1999)

Die Piccolomini (Friedrich Schiller, 1799)

Wallensteins Tod (Friedrich Schiller, 1799)

Walden (Henry David Thoreau, 1854)

Christiane und Goethe (Sigrid Damm, 1998)

La Casa de los Espiritus (Isabel Allende, 1982)

Penthesilea (Heinrich von Kleist, 1808)

Die Geschichte der Bienen (Maja (!) Lunde, 2015)

Glimpses of World History (Jawaharlal Nehru, 1930/1962)

Howards End (E. M. Forster, 1910)

A Passage to India (E. M. Forster, 1924)

The Picture of Dorian Gray (Oscar Wilde, 1890)

Die Entdeckung der Langsamkeit (Sten Nadolny, 1983)

Frühlings Erwachen (Frank Wedekind, 1891)

87 fucking truths lmao

Rules: When you get tagged, the game is to write a note with 87 truths about yourself. After that, you’re supposed to tag 25 people. You also have to tag the person who tagged you. Let’s all get to know each other! I was tagged by: 

@for-noxus

1. Last beverage: Oolong Tea

2. Last phone call: my grammy

3. Last text: My best friend @garden-goth

4. Last song: Crayon by G-Dragon

5. Last time you cried: two days ago for a very long time, it was horrible

Have you ever….

6. Dated someone twice: nope, never really dated anyone ever so

7. Been cheated on: nope

8. Kissed anyone and regretted it: ...YES

9. Lost someone special: Yes.

10. Been depressed: I’m currently depressed and have anxiety which I take medication for 

11. Been drunk and threw up: I’ve only thrown up briefly the next morning (I have acid reflux/GERD so alcohol late at night KILLS MY STOMACH but I’ve never had a hangover)

List your three favorite colors… 

12. Pink (all shades)

13. Red

14. Black

In the last year have you…

15. Made a new friend: Recently? I think so... maybe not, idk

16. Fallen out of love: yup

17. Laughed until you cried: a few times, and I love it

18. Met someone who changed you: Yes, many people. For the better, too, I hope.

19. Found out who your true friends are: Yup. Sammy is my #1, she’s the only one who really listens to me. I have friends who would be there for me if I really needed them, but it’s easy for me to tell when they care and when they don’t, and that’s kind of painful to realize.

20. Found out someone was talking about you: LOL yeaaaah and it really pissed me off, but what can you do?

21. Kissed anyone on your FB list: nope

22. How many people do you know on your FB list: I haven’t met all of them in real life, but I’ve spoken to most of them a lot, so I would say around 90%

23. Do you have any pets: YES!!! I have a dog, a siamese cat, a betta fish, and a leopard gecko. My sister has a crested gecko, but he creeps me out.

24. Do you want to change your name: Nah, it’s kind of unique so I don’t mind. My mom loves it too, so I could never.

25. What did you do for your last birthday party: Had cake and icecream with my family

26. What time did you wake up today: 11:14am

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: scrolling through FB haha

28. Something you cannot wait for: to pay off my school bill and pay my gram for her car so I can start saving up for TEACHING ABROAD

29. Last time you saw your mother: literally two seconds ago, I live in her house

30. One thing you wish you could change about your life: My lack of money and motivation. At least I’m trying to fix both.

31. What are you listening to right now: my youngest brother, who turns 5 tomorrow, scream because he won Mario Kart against my dad and my other brother who is 7

32. Have you ever talked to a Tom: um... a guy named Tom? Yes

33. What’s getting on your nerves right now: My brother screaming -_-

34. Most viewed webpage: Tumblr right now

35. Nickname: Meegs, Meegee

36. Relationship status: Single, as always

37. Zodiac sign: Leo

38. Elementary: Not sharing this, too personal, nobody knows where I really live

39. High school: Nah

40. College: Lock Haven University of PA

41. Hair color: Brown

42. Long or short: Long

43. Height: 5’9″

44. Do you have a crush on someone: Nope

45. What do you like about yourself: My eyes are a pretty color

46. Tattoos: A branch with 3 Rose of Sharon flowers, though one hasn’t bloomed yet, with the quote “the sun will rise and we will try again” from a Twenty One Pilots song

47. Right or left handed: Right

48. First piercings: ears, that’s it. Only the first hole. That’s literally it, until I move out I’m not really allowed to get any. My mom was already mad that I got a tattoo lol

49. First best friend: Abby Krah

50. First sport you joined: AYSO Soccer

51. First vacation: West Virginia? I think

52. First pair of trainers: no idea

53. Eating: nothin

54. Drinking: tea

55. About to: do some TEFL studying

56. Watching: The Office

57. Listening to: my brother cry because he got in trouble for hitting and my sister make stupid noises while playing with the dog

58. Waiting for: bed time -_- I love my siblings but holy crap, sometimes they’re so loud and I need a break but the only time I have away from them is when they go to bed lol

Your Future…

59. Want kids: not sure. Maybe, maybe not

60. Get married: I hope so, but I don’t really see it happening within the next 5-10 years. I haven’t even dated, really. I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’m super in-experienced and I have really high standards when it comes to men because my dad is a great person and is always willing to do things for his family, and I want someone who will see me as an equal and NOT any other way. 

61. Career: dunno, I have a degree in English writing with a minor in history

62. Lips or eyes: both

63. Hugs or kisses: I LOVE hugs and cuddling

64. Shorter or taller: taller, for the love of god, I am so tall and I need someone taller I am so sorry but I hate being taller than the person I like

65. Older or younger: older, but as long as the person is MATURE enough for me, I don’t care. 

66. Romantic or spontaneous: both

67. Nice stomach or arms: don’t really care

68. Loud or sensitive: both? my family is loud, so they would need to be able to participate and handle it

69. Hook-up or relationship: RELATIONSHIP

70. Trouble maker or hesitant: trouble maker. I love adventure.

71. Kissed a stranger: ......... yes, damn it

72. Drank hard liquor: yep

73. Lost glasses/contacts: yes, not often though since I’ve worn them for over 16 years

74. Had sex on a first date: I’m a virgin, so... nah

75. Broken someone’s heart: No? don’t think so. I don’t know any guys who have had a crush on me???? or any who have come right out and said it at least

76. Been arrested: hell no

77. Turned someone down: Yes? but I couldn’t tell what they wanted, whether it was just sex or they actually liked me, so idk

78. Cried when someone died: YES. it hurts.

79. Fallen for a friend: yes, and it was horrible because it ended badly.

Do you believe in…

80. Yourself: I try to

81. Miracles: yes

82. Love at first sight: no

83. Heaven: I don’t see why not

84. Santa Claus: no lmao

85. Kisses on first dates: yep, only because my first date would be with someone I’m already comfortable with, so I would be comfortable with kissing them. I think.

86. Angels: I don’t see why not

87. Reincarnation: eh, I dunno

 I now tag: I DON’T WANT TO TAG 25 PEOPLE SO

@garden-goth @yuurikaatsuki @grizzlyman77

A Prince & a Pirate’s Fate - 14

— ♠ — ♠ — ♠ —

Chapter Fourteen

Start at Chapter one here:https://shytalia.tumblr.com/post/611878754309079040/a-prince-and-a-pirates-fate-usuk-fanfic

Also available on my AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shytalia

The mature content originally in this chapter have been taken out because tumblr is tumblr. So, ya know, it’s on AO3 instead lol

— ♠ — ♠ — ♠ —

Alfred wrapped his arms around Arthur’s waist and pulled him against him, only encouraged by the Brit’s hands roaming over his chest and shoulders. When the need for air became too much to ignore, he pulled away but quickly nuzzled against the captain’s neck instead.

The younger man left a trail of affection across it before standing up, bringing Arthur up with him, wrapped securely in his arms.

“W-What? What are you doing?” The shorter man balked, taken aback by the fact Alfred so easily lifted him up and was carrying him away. “Where the hell do you think you’re taking me?” He complained, pushing at his shoulders to give him a slight glare.

Despite this, Alfred could clearly see the tint of red across his captain’s face. He grinned down at him in his arms, easily keeping him in his hold. “Just to a more comfortable spot. You gotta trust me, Artie.”

The rocks they had been sitting on did have a wonderful view, but they weren’t exactly the most comfortable thing. So, he decided to move them to the plump grass edging the beach and he plopped himself down on it. The motion brought the older man down with him and Alfred easily pulled him safely onto his lap, circling his arms around his waist once more.

He grinned smugly at the pirate straddled across his lap and pulled him closer so he could continue kissing against his neck. He pressed his lips tenderly to his throat, biting down in spots he had learned earned him the most reactions. Slowly he started running his hands across Arthur’s body, squeezing him at his hips and satisfied with the vocal response it gave him.

Alfred slowly ran his hands up and down the pirate’s thighs, over his chest under his shirt, and gripped his hips to grind him down onto him.

Arthur encouraged his servant’s touches by rocking against him to cause some friction.

“You are so gorgeous,” Alfred breathed against his neck. “Smart, strong, and nice on the eyes? Fuck, Arthur that’s just not fair.”

The Brit rolled his eyes. “I’m already on your lap, there’s no need to do that.”

“Do what?” Alfred pulled back so he could look at the other, but his hands stayed firmly on his hips. The confusion clear on his face. “No need to do what? Compliment you? But I want to.” He nuzzled back into that pale neck, now blemished with teeth marks and dark spots from his teasing. “It’s all true so why shouldn’t I tell you?”

Arthur really didn’t have a comeback so he just hummed, the vibrations sending chills through Alfred’s lips still placed on his throat. He could feel Alfred’s eagerness already and couldn’t stop himself from letting out a breathy chuckle.

This caused Alfred to peek up at him through lidded eyes, giving him a lopsided smile as if it were the most natural thing in the world to look at his captain that way.

“What’s so funny?” He asked.

“Hmm...I was just wondering,” Arthur ran his hands down Alfred’s front, reveling in the feeling of the strength that lied under his fingers even through the fabric of his shirt. “When were you going to notice we don’t have any oils with us?”

For a few, quiet moments, Arthur swore he could see the gears in Alfred’s head turning until realization visibly dawned on him.

“O-Oh, shit. You’re right. We could, uhh--” He hadn’t thought that part through. Then again, he hadn’t asked Arthur to come to the beach with him just so they could sleep together so the thought to bring any lubrication hadn't even popped up. He had only wanted some peaceful time with the captain before they had to board the ship again. Not that Alfred was complaining about this outcome, but this did throw quite the wrench in this new plan.

Arthur laughed again, a little louder this time, and Alfred couldn’t help but stop and listen, his goofy smile returning as he did.

“I love your laugh.” He admitted freely as Arthur grinned at him with a cocked brow.

“You must love giving compliments as well.”

“To you, yes.” Alfred’s smile widened and he pressed a few kisses to Arthur's face, covering his cheeks and nose with affection. His thumbs ran gentle circles across his waist as he did so.

For a while, Alfred was content to just hold Arthur close to him like this. He was surprised when the captain didn’t make a move to get off him since the passion had been halted by a lack of preparation. But, for some strange reason unknown to Alfred, the pirate seemed just as content to simply lean against him and rest his shaggy head lazily on his shoulder. Alfred traded his heated strokes for loving pets, carting his fingers through the other’s blonde hair.

“You know,” the prince said into the quiet. “I had a brother too.”

The words were not lost on Arthur and he stiffened slightly. “Had?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“Yeah...” Alfred started, rubbing a hand lazily along the pirate’s spine. Arthur wondered to himself if it was the boy trying to comfort himself more than anything by the gesture.

“So...when I was little, I had a brother. He was my best friend...really my only friend, now that I think about it.” As a prince he didn’t have many opportunities to make actual, lasting friendships. He was friendly, sure, and his people adored him for the most part. But, it also made it difficult to really connect on a personal level when everyone around you either feared overstepping their boundaries or wanted to take advantage of your wealth.

“You seem like the type of lad who would have had a lot of friends.” Arthur commented from his spot against his shoulder and Alfred could feel the man’s warm breath against his skin.

The prince laughed a little bit, but was careful not to move too much lest their comfortable position be ruined. “Yeah, I guess. I mean, I was always surrounded by people, but none of them really knew me, ya know?” Arthur made a small sound that Alfred took as agreement so he continued. “Anyway, Mattie--that’s my brother’s name--went missing a couple years ago...”

Arthur noticed the premature silence and shifted in the other man’s hold, angling himself so he could instead peer up at him without having to move too much. He looked at the sullen smile on his captive’s face as he stared off into nothing, most likely reminiscing old memories he shared with his sibling before his disappearance. He often did the same thing when he thought about his own, deceased family.

“You never found out where he went?” Arthur willed himself to ask, despite knowing Alfred probably didn’t want to talk about this. Then again, if he didn’t, he never would have brought it up. He could hear the strain in his voice as he spoke about his brother but something pulled Arthur to know more.

“No...he disappeared without a trace. There wasn’t any sort of sign of a struggle or anything, so we held out hope for a while that he just ran away and would come back home on his own but...it’s been so long and we haven’t heard a word from him. I don’t know what to think anymore.” He admitted slowly. “I don’t know where he is or if he’s okay...I don’t know if he’s even alive and if he is, why’d he leave? Without telling anyone? Even me? We were so close and yet, suddenly...I was alone without anyone at all.”

Arthur wasn’t sure what the wrenching feeling in his chest was, all he knew was he felt the need to wrap his arms around the body that encased him. Without a sound he lifted his arms and curled them around Alfred’s waist. His gesture didn’t go unappreciated as he heard a soft, relieved sigh escape his servant’s mouth. He was surprisingly content to just sit there while holding each other for a while, still resting his head atop the bigger man’s shoulder. He allowed his eyes a moment of rest as he breathed in the warm scent that was Alfred’s skin as his nose lightly grazed against his neck, picking up on hints of spice and earth.

Never before had he felt as relaxed with someone as he did in this moment. It was a little strange at first, he had to admit to himself. He was an unlawful criminal, after all, he didn’t spend his time cuddling. At most he had one-night stands to satisfy his needs and went on his way, but something about Alfred pulled him in and he couldn’t help but settle neatly in his arms like he was made to do it.

The reality of these foreign feelings scared Arthur, if he was being truthful.

He could fight and he could die and he wouldn’t blink an eye at that fact, save for his need to protect Peter. But opening up to a man that claimed to love him? That was a feat Arthur found terrifying for all different reasons. Memories of loss mixed together with new, bright feelings of warmth inside his chest. He needed to be cautious lest he feel that pain again of losing someone he cared about.

“We should move,” The Brit voiced but he stayed still as ever. “It’s getting late and we can’t stay on the island long...the navy will find us if we do.” It was the sad reality that he couldn’t stay longer, but breathing in the familiar air of his family’s home gave him some sense of nostalgic comfort. “Let’s get back to the house and sleep. We have to depart in the morning.”

Alfred reluctantly unwrapped his arms from Arthur’s smaller frame but did move just yet. Instead, he leaned back and looked at him quietly.

Arthur allowed the larger man to pull back, but gave him a questioning look as the other simply stared at him. “What?” He asked, a foreign feeling of self-consciousness washing over him under those eyes. Why was Alfred looking at him like that?

“Just thinking.” Alfred answered before he leaned forward again but this time pressed a kiss into Arthur’s messy, blonde hair. “But you’re right, let’s get back.”

Arthur nodded, doing his best to ignore the heaviness in his gut as he stood up. He waited for Alfred to follow suit before they both headed back towards the dimly lit house on the hill.

With his eyes focused more on Alfred and the small building in the distance, Arthur failed to notice the ships circling like vultures on the horizon.

--- ♠ --- ♠ --- ♠ ---

The next morning was busy with Arthur forcing Peter and Alfred to wake up. The British captain stubbornly ignored their pleas for “five more minutes” and eventually tore the covers off the larger man who gave a slight shriek as the cold air hit his skin.

After the fight of getting the other two blondes up, they were on their way back towards town. It was still quite early but many of the shops were already open and Arthur allowed Peter to stop into a bakery to pick out something sweet for breakfast. The childish pout Alfred gave him until he relented and also allowed him to pick something out as well was almost familiar to him now.

“So, the people here really don’t mind you being here?” Alfred asked as they walked through the streets slowly coming alive with people.

“No, not really. I think they know I won’t let my crew do anything here. Really all they do is drink at the bars and that’s good for business.” Arthur explained. “I also pay for someone to keep the house clean and the graves tended to while we’re away. So, as long as no one starts trouble, all we do is toss a good, few coins their way.”

It had been awkward at first, but eventually the townspeople accepted Arthur’s crew once they realized they paid well and didn’t start any fights. The captain himself was polite enough to everyone he met and was quick to give away his coin in exchange for making sure his childhood home was taken care of, so it was a win-win for the town as a whole. It was business.

“I guess that makes sense.” Alfred replied, still rather curious about the whole arrangement but it explained a few things at least.

They continued on their way and when they were back on the ship, Alfred was almost sad to leave the small town behind. He had enjoyed the place Arthur grew up and felt there was a lot there he could have explored about the shorter man.

What had he been like before he was forced to become a pirate? What did he want to do in life before then? If Peter had never been found out as a Joker and his family spared, would Arthur have willingly become his queen? Would his family like him?

Questions floated around his head even after they parted the dock and he watched Arthur and Peter on the deck, staring as their past grew into a hazy blur in the distance.

The rest of the crew busied themselves with their usual work, but Alfred stuck by the Brit’s side, quietly trying to bring some sort of comfort to him. The somber look on the smaller man’s face tore his heart in two, but the Brit still turned and gave him a small smile despite the hurt behind his green eyes.

Alfred swore then and there that he would make sure Arthur could visit his homeland as often as possible. He would do anything to see that blissful look in his future-husband’s eyes as much as he could.

--- ♠ --- ♠ --- ♠ ---

A couple days passed out on the open sea and Alfred was glued to Arthur more than ever before. Rather than sending the prince off to do menial tasks with the rest of the crew when he didn’t need him, the British captain allowed him to sit with him instead.

Alfred took these private moments with an obvious enthusiasm, even if all he did was sit and watch Arthur read or work through some papers. He wasn’t bothered at all by the lack of action and took the time together for everything it was worth.

“What are you reading about?” Alfred asked when Arthur was curled up on his bed, book in his hands. “Do you want to tell me about it?”

Arthur would’ve thought he’d be annoyed by someone interrupting his novel, and to a point he guessed he was, but something about Alfred’s genuine curiosity about something he was enjoying was endearing in and of itself. The sentiment was so purely Alfred that Arthur couldn’t make himself be upset about being disturbed and indulged the blue-eyed man with the story, not failing to notice the interest sparkling in his eyes as he listened attentively.

Arthur found himself smiling the whole time, something he hadn’t done in a long time.

He couldn’t believe it.

This was too good to be true.

“Why don’t you come here? I think I’m finished reading for now.” The Brit offered as he set his book on the nightstand and shifted to make more room on the bed.

Alfred practically jumped at the opportunity, always seeming to get excited whenever Arthur allowed him to get close. Even if they weren’t intimate, Alfred relished in being able to touch the fiery Brit in any way possible.

Arthur could only laugh as the younger male quickly sat beside him and instantly a protective arm was draped around his smaller waist, blue eyes staring down at him expectantly innocent.

“Good boy,” Arthur all but purred, running his slender fingers through that wheat blonde hair and earning himself a wide smile from the man beside him. “You’ve been exceedingly well-behaved, I think you’ve more than earned a bit of a reward. Don’t you?”

“Is that mercy I hear from the great Captain Kirkland?” Alfred grinned playfully, his arm tightening ever so slightly around his waist.

Arthur let out another small chuckle, his fingers now running along the tan man’s jaw. “You’ll think that until I have you screaming for me, love.” He whispered, reaching over to push his lips against Alfred’s.

The prince was quick to respond, leaning in himself and meeting Arthur halfway into the kiss. His tongue traced the edges of his lips and when the opportunity was given, he pushed it deeper and into the pirate’s mouth to explore. Arthur tasted like tea and sea salt, not much to Alfred’s surprise. It was a mixture that, under any other circumstances, he probably would have grimaced at. But, somehow with Arthur, he wanted nothing more but to indulge himself with that taste on his lips as he devoured him whole.

He rolled them over, deepening the kiss as he hovered over his lover with ease. One hand held himself up but the other busied itself by snaking into Arthur’s shirt.

Within a matter of minutes Arthur's shirt had been discarded and their arms were around each other again. Alfred bit marks down Arthur’s neck and chest, taking his time on spots that made the Brit sigh in want.

“You take your sweet time, don’t you?” Arthur breathed out, hands tangled in Alfred’s hair as the man in question assaulted his chest with more kisses.

Alfred chuckled, his breath hot against the most recent love mark he’d created. “Can’t help it, I love fawning over you. How can I rush when you look so good all marked up by me?” He lifted his head so he could grin down at Arthur’s red face. “Don’t be so impatient, you know it’ll be worth the wait, Captain Kirkland.”

“Heh, you’re a right cocky prick in bed, aren’t you?” Arthur smirked up at him, already panting slightly from the attention his body was being given.

Alfred laughed again and gave a shrug. “You don’t seem to mind much.” Once more Alfred took his time planting kisses and bites across the snowy skin of his captain. His hands worked quickly to undo the pirate’s belt and he slid his pants off with relative ease.

It was easy enough to work his own shirt off, throwing it to the floor without a care of where they went. Then, he was on Arthur again, running his hands along the newly revealed skin and marking the pale flesh at every angle. That was, until he felt nails digging into his back, drawing him upwards again and into a heated kiss.

“Why don’t you get undressed and we can really have some fun?” The captain breathed against his servant’s ear. He bit the sensitive lobe and pulled it with his teeth.

Alfred’s breath hitched at the feeling, but he was absentmindedly undoing his own belt all the same. “We’ll worry about me later. I’m more focused on pleasing my captain right now.”

He wasn’t exactly lying, but in the back of his mind he knew better than to allow Arthur to remove his trousers and see the mark. If he saw it now before Alfred could explain himself then all this time would be wasted because Arthur would absolutely hate him and he would have no way to win him back.

To ease his captain’s annoyed frown at his response, Alfred leaned back down and kissed his way down his chest to his stomach and eventually along the insides of his thighs. The satisfied sighs escaping the Brit’s lips was a good indication that he was doing a fairly good job at ‘pleasing his captain’.

Still, he wasn't exactly satisfied with just gentle moans. He wanted so much more from that wonderful, accented voice.

--- ♠ --- ♠ --- ♠ ---

A few hours later, Arthur woke up feeling warm and still pressed against a tanned chest. Hands were idly rubbing at his side in a soothing motion. Stealing a glance upward, he could see Alfred’s face sleeping soundly as ever.

Without much thought, he carefully pushed himself upwards and closer to the sleeping man’s face. He was a sight for sore eyes, that much was true. He was handsome and toned, his blonde hair was muzzled and sweaty from the night’s activities. Arthur softly dragged his slender fingers across his strong jaw and appreciated the absolute beauty that was Alfred.

Gods, he was falling, wasn’t he?

The thought alone scared him but at the same time he felt so warm he didn’t have the will to pull himself away.

He was Captain Arthur Kirkland of the terrifying Siren’s Arrow! He was meant to be feared and respected!

And yet, oh and yet...here he was, wrapped in a young man’s arms that held more promise than just a simple night of pleasure.

Where had Alfred come from? The capital, of course, but Arthur was fairly certain he must’ve been sent from the Divines themselves. He wasn’t meant to find happiness in the arms of another, and yet he was.

He shifted once more to curl up into that warm body, lazily setting his head on that broad chest and listened to the gentle hum of Alfred’s heart beneath his ear. His green eyes blinked sleepily out into the room, the rocking of the ship more than enough to will him back to sleep against the other man. It was picture perfect.

And yet.

Arthur’s brows knitted together tiredly, hardly an effort at all but he found his curiosity peaked. As his eyes tiredly followed the trail of Alfred’s body, across his chest, his strong arms, and his stomach, he stopped searching suddenly when a peculiar darkness peaked out from under the boy’s trousers.

He had a tattoo?

He hadn’t mentioned having one before but, then again, the topic had never really come up either. Still, he couldn’t say he wasn’t just a bit curious.

A bit more awake now than before, he leaned up once more and tugged at the waist line of Alfred’s pants to get a better view.

Maybe it was something embarrassing? Am ex-lovers name, perhaps? Arthur almost snickered at the thought of teasing Alfred with something that scandalous.

Or, what if it was an ode to his lost brother? Much like Arthur named his ship, it wouldn’t be uncouth to think one might ink their skin in memory of someone they missed.

All these possibilities crossed Arthur’s mind as he leaned up and pulled at the cloth shielding the dark ink on his lover’s hip. He took only a second to appreciate the definition of his body there before the mark was fully unveiled.

Arthur’s breath caught in his throat and he froze.

Sitting there, just under Alfred’s hip bone, was a shape Arthur knew all too well. It matched perfectly to the one staining his own back that he had tried more than once to claw off like a desperate animal. But no matter what he tried, the mark remained perfectly dark against his pale skin.

And now, here was Alfred, with the same mark right where the spoiled prince was said to have his.

This wasn't happening.

His sweet, naive, loving, foolish, utterly stupid Alfred was the same man he hated from the castle. His Alfred was the prince he swore he wanted to kill. The reality of it knocked the air from his lungs.

“No.” The word escaped Arthur’s lips so quietly he almost didn’t think he said them at all. The warm air of the room quickly dropped to an icy chill, stirring the heat loving body of the prince awake with discomfort.

“Hng, Artie?” Alfred whined tiredly, rubbing at his eyes to wipe away the sleepiness in them. He finally opened them to find Arthur staring down, his emerald gaze wide and disbelieving. Alfred followed to where he was looking and a chill ran down his spine when he saw his revealed Spade mark.

“H-Hey, Artie, it’s alright.” He broke the stiff silence with a forced smile, but his nervousness was clear as day in his tone. “Come on, we can talk--” He reached his arms out to wrap around the smaller man and bring him close, but was violently rejected by Arthur hitting his face and scrambling away.

“Don’t fucking touch me!” The captain screamed, clawing his way out of the bed as if being near Alfred a second longer would burn him. “You...you bastard!”

Alfred collected himself as much as he could, the force of the hit and Arthur kicking him in an attempt to get away forcing him to sprawl across the bed messily. When he blinked away his shock, he finally looked up at the British pirate and his heart sank to his feet.

Arthur’s eyes were wide with disbelief and fury, his brows cast down in a rage and he was shaking, either from anger or shock or both. But the worst was the blatant gleam of betrayal in his eyes, the absolute hurt resting behind the anger tore into Alfred’s chest.

“Arthur, I’m sor--” He reached out again, desperate to right his wrongs.

But Arthur was faster and as soon as Alfred’s hands were about to touch him, he grabbed one of his lover’s wrists and twisted it at a painful angle.

“Ah! Arthur, stop!” Alfred had to twist his entire body to relieve some of the pain shooting from his twisted arm. “Arthur, just listen! I--AH!”

This only seemed to anger the smaller man more as his grip tightened and twisted more, sending new signals of pain all throughout his captive’s body.

“You fucking liar.” Arthur snarled, pushing Alfred with enough force to send him stumbling backwards against a dresser. The bigger man gasped at the pain as the wood shoved into his spine. “I knew it. I fucking knew it. You’re a lying prick just like the rest of them. I’m so fucking stupid to think for even a moment that I could trust anyone.”

Except for Peter, Arthur really was utterly alone. This was evident now more than ever.

How could he have ever let himself fall this hard?

Alfred hissed at what would no doubt be a bruise on his back later, but right now the bigger problem was the man glaring him down. It would’ve been comical to see Arthur standing there angry but still completely naked, if it wasn’t for the fact he was dead meat if he didn’t calm him down.

“Arthur, I’m sorry! I wasn’t trying to lie to you, I really do care about you. I wanted to tell you but I knew you’d be upset.” Alfred tried to reason, but as he took a step closer, Arthur’s rage built higher.

The Brit lifted his hand, a nasty snarl revealing his teeth in a predatory way. His magic built and Alfred felt himself being pulled by invisible chains towards the wall, his legs and arms being dragged behind him.

“A-Arthur, wait!” Alfred begged, fear suddenly gripping him as he was pulled backwards by a force he couldn’t see. He didn’t need to, he knew it was magic.

A dark laugh echoed through the room. “Upset?” Arthur grinned. It was the same, sadistic feature that glared down at Mathias at The King’s Grave. The same, violent look that practically mutilated a man’s mouth and tore his tongue to pieces until he was gagging up blood.

Alfred swallowed back his terror at seeing that grin and those murderous eyes focused on him.

“I’m so much more than ‘upset’, love.” Arthur stepped forwards and for the first time, Alfred shrinked back away from him. “To think, my dear ‘future husband’ has been here all this time? Right under my nose, no less. How clever.” The Brit picked up his clothes that had been haphazardly thrown to the floor the night before. He was painstakingly slow as he pulled them back on, taking his time to let Alfred soak in the reality of his situation. “You really left the safety of the castle to come find me by yourself? That’s so...stupid of you, darling. I thought you were smarter than that, at least.”

Alfred couldn’t stop himself from shaking. This wasn’t right! Arthur wasn’t supposed to look at him that way, not like he was a monster. He was supposed to forgive him, which he knew wouldn’t be easy, but he wouldn’t even get the chance to try to earn it if the captain ripped him apart piece by piece first.

“A-Artie, please.” He croaked out, the magical binds starting to burn at his skin as they pulled with little mercy, trapping him in place. “Sweetheart, this isn’t you. Come on, you know I would never hurt you on purpose. Just let me explain.”

A sharp smack to the side of his face was the immediate reaction. The force of the blow would have surely knocked him to his side if the binds weren’t still holding him still.

“Shut the fuck up, as if I’d want to listen to anything you have to say.” Arthur’s grin was gone and replaced by a deep frown. He gripped his captive’s hair in a tight fist and forced his head back, exposing his throat.

For a moment, Arthur considered ripping it out with just his bare teeth. But that would be too quick of a death, wouldn’t it? The beloved Prince of Spades deserved something so much slower than that.

“Art...Arthur, I love you so fucking much it hurts.”

A loud thud could be heard and a pained grunt when the Brit landed another, sharp blow to his servant’s body. This time, it was a hard punch to the gut.

“I told you to shut the hell up.” Arthur growled, pulling the hair again but this time to force Alfred to look at him. He glared up into pleading, blue eyes with little remorse. “I’m going to make you beg for death.”

It was a promise Alfred could tell he meant. It’s truth sent a shiver of fear through his body.

“A-Art--”

Instead of being interrupted by another painful blow, his plea was knocked out of him by a forceful shake of the entire ship. A loud crash could be heard not too far away and the entire boat lurched violently to the side, nearly sending both men tumbling towards the floor. The distant yelling of crew members could be heard and some were screaming for their captain.

“What the bloody hell is going on now?” Arthur practically screeched in anger, obviously trying to decide whether investigating or torturing his prisoner was more important.

“Captain! Captain! The royal navy! And--AGH!”

The sound of a crew member yelling towards his room was ended by yet another, forceful shake of the ship and more screams.

“Shit!” Arthur cursed, turning his back on Alfred in favor of storming out to the deck.

Alfred was certain Arthur hadn’t meant to, but he felt himself be released from the magical binds and he slumped to the floor with a loud thud. Once he got his bearing, he chased after the Brit and stumbled into the chaos that was the pirate ship’s main deck.

Around him men raced, either fighting to stay alive or to keep the ship on course. The men he had come to recognize as his fellow crew members were being slaughtered by invading uniforms he knew more than well. Spadian navy officers piled onto the foreign boat, swords and guns raised to take lives and not captives. But the pirates weren’t going down easily, bringing their own weapons against their attackers until the wood of the ship ran red with blood.

How many were there? Who should he even be hoping to win?

He didn't want the crew he had come to know to be killed like cattle but just as well, as Prince, he couldn't wish for the death of his loyal citizens.

He loved Arthur but the man would skin him alive when this was over, no doubt. But he didn’t want him to die by the hands of a navy man either or be forcefully captured. Alfred glanced out at the invading ship and its proud display of Spadian colors, printed like a beacon on the mast and on flags littering the ship. No wonder pirates hated the royals, their symbols were plastered all over the boats trying to kill them.

But this wasn’t his main concern. No, it was only then that Alfred realized with a sharp gasp how horrible this situation truly was for Arthur and his crew.

There was not one royal ship invading them but multiple, all circling The Siren’s Arrow like vultures around a rotting meal. And in the midst of them was the most surprising thing of all, not a navy ship, but a pirate one. Completely unharmed and allowed to swim peacefully as if it belonged to the pack of hungry ships itself.

In a moment of realization, Alfred’s eyes scanned the carnage desperately, searching for any sign that Arthur was still even alive amidst the violence.

Then, he saw him. A flash of blonde hair and furious green eyes, Arthur rammed his sword into the belly of a uniformed soldier, twisting it until he saw the life fall from his eyes. Blood already covered the captain’s body as if he had slaughtered ten men already in the short time it had taken Alfred to find him, and perhaps he had. If the speed in which Arthur dug his blade into an invader with no hesitation was any indication, he was certain the navy men were being cut down by the second.

But Alfred still had to get to him, he had to keep Arthur safe. He had promised! As angry as Arthur was with him, he was not about to let him be killed by his royal soldiers.

“Arthur!” He yelled, his cries drowning in the sea of men screaming in pain or fury. He narrowly dodged a falling body and stumbled out of its way, having to step over it in order to continue his pursuit. “Arthur!” He called again once he was closer, dragging himself between bodies covered in sweat, blood, and gunpowder.

The British captain either didn’t hear him or ignored him on purpose, choosing instead to push his sword into the throat of an unfortunate victim.

“You bastards! Get the hell off my ship!”

Arthur lifted his hand again and this time it glowed a hazy blue, and with it the waters of the seas themselves lifted and rocked the ship with them. Alfred barely had time to hold onto something before the movement shook him around the bloodied deck like a rag doll. Not unnoticed, he saw several men fall overboard and into the sea. None were pirates, so they must’ve known about this particular trick and prepared themselves for it. Arthur was not shy about using magic to win this battle.

“Arthur!” He tried again as he pulled himself closer to the green-eyed man, this time receiving a dangerous glare in return.

“This was your doing!” The captain accused, his crimson stained blade shining mockingly with the blood of his people was then turned on him. “You did this!”

“No! Arthur, I swear!” Alfred tried to fight back against the false claim. He hadn’t done this but it did beg the question of who did? He knew enough about their navy to know that this many royal ships together were not commonplace, so this wasn’t just a random encounter. This was an ambush.

There was another crash and the ship creaked under the pressure of another blow. Looking back, Alfred could see the pirate ship he had spotted now up close and personal as it connected itself to The Siren's Arrow. It’s crew members spilling out onto Arthur’s ship with blood thirst in their eyes.

“Fuck!” Arthur yelled, rushing towards the newest onslaught with his weapon raised.

“No!” Alfred pleaded, following as quickly as he could but he wasn’t as accustomed to the quick rocking of the ship as Arthur was. Through the gun smoke and struggling bodies, he could see Arthur ending more lives than he could ever hope to count in this chaos.

And yet, it wasn’t enough.

More navy ships grew closer, more enemies jumped on board. Soon, it was too much. The Siren’s Arrow was overrun.

“You fuckers!” Another flash of light, no doubt Arthur’s magic, and a number of the invading navy men and pirates were cut down. And still, more boarded and took their place with more murder in their eyes than the last.

This wasn’t good, they were being overwhelmed. Even Arthur and his magic was being bombarded with body after body and he could see the British captain starting to grow tired.

It only ended when a loud laugh interrupted the fighting. It was a laugh he knew and he clenched his fists in response to it.

“Well, well! This is all so nice and all, but we really do have business to attend to!” Mathias was standing there by the wheel of the ship, not far from the entrance of Arthur’s private quarters. In his grasp was a squirming Peter, writhing under his iron grip.

“No!” Alfred heard and knew it was Arthur, desperate to keep his brother from that madman.

“Yes! You’ve been free from your fate for far too long, don’t you think, Kirkland? It’s about time you...settle down.” The Dane’s voice was slurred and almost forced, no doubt due to the torture Arthur inflicted on him. It was a wonder how he healed as well as he did, even nearly having his tongue cut off obviously wasn’t enough to keep the cocky bastard from talking. “And just so you don’t try any funny tricks.” The spiky-haired blonde raised a pistol to the younger Kirkland’s head, his intentions clear. If Arthur tried anything, he’d shoot Peter’s brains out right in front of him.

Alfred spared a worried glance back at Arthur, his green eyes now wide and pleading. No longer was he the angel of death he was just moments ago, now, he almost seemed broken.

Behind him, a man in uniform stepped forward and struck the back of the Brit’s head, causing him to release his weapon in surprise and fall forward with a grunt. Before anyone could help him, the navy man had him shackled with cuffs around his wrists.

“Now, that’s much better, isn’t it?” Mathias grinned far too wide for his face and his eyes went to the crowd that stared at him. “Let’s see...oh, there you are. Our dear, beloved Prince Alfred!” His cold gaze locked sharply on his target, causing everyone else around them to turn and stare as well.

Alfred froze in his spot. Mathias knew who he was? Since when? It didn’t really matter now, did it? Everyone knew the truth now and he was caught in the crossfire with all eyes on him.

“Be a good royal dog and step forwards, come on, where your queen can see you.” The menace was clear in the Dane’s voice and fearing for both Arthur and Peter’s safety, Alfred complied and did as he was told.

He slowly slunk forward, only mere feet away from where Arthur was on his knees glaring at the floorboards of his ship, arms bent behind him and bound. He looked furious. He looked defeated.

“Here’s the deal, Princey.” Mathias laughed. “You’re going to get a free pass back home, isn’t that great? Your royal guards are even here to escort you and your queen back to the castle. No more living on this shit hole of a ship, huh?” He laughed again and Alfred wanted to punch the sound right out of his throat. But he couldn’t, not with Peter still in his grip. “Now, be good or your little Joker here will get his head blown off. We wouldn’t want that, would we? No? Good. So here’s what you’re going to do...”

8.4.16 (first)

4.11.17 (second)

1. Last kiss: never happened- in front of the park across the street from my house a little over a week ago - Yesterday 

2. Last phone call: idk- me calling my grandma back, but she didn’t answer lol - Bruno

3. Last text message: they are emojis- i think me saying something about apartments and moving out or something - Texting Bruno how much I miss him

4. Last song you listened to:idk- G.O.M.D - by j cole - Candy by Doja Cat

5. Last time you cried: two days ago kind of- i don’t rememeber - Yesterday

HAVE YOU EVER:

6. Dated someone twice: no- no - no

7. Been cheated on: no- no - no

8. Self harmed: no- no - no

9. Lost someone special: yes- yes 

10. Been depressed: no- hmm no - kinda

11. Been drunk and threw up: no- nah - yes

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU:

12. had sex: no- yes - yes

13. How many people have you had sex with this year? none- one - one

14. Discovered something new about yourself: probably- im guessing yes - yes

15. Made a new friend: yes- yes - I don’t think so

16. Kissed someone: no- yes - yes

17. Laughed until you cried: yes- yes i do that a lot actually haha - im pretty sure

18. Met someone who changed you: idk- yeah - not this year

19. Found out who your true friends were: yes- hmm i mean i guess? - eh

20. Found out someone was talking about you: probably lol- haha nah - i don't think so

21. Lost a friend: kind of- i dont think so - no

22. Lost a family member: no- no - no, just a dog if that counts

23. Discovered a new talent: no- no - no

24. Moved house: no- no - yes

25. Found something you thought you’d lost : yes- probably - same

RANDOM:

26. What did you do for your last Birthday: nothing really- i just hung out with my best friend on the actual day and i had a small close friend party it was fun - It was kinda boring, I just went hiking, then went to eat at a mexican resteraunt

27. What time did you wake up today: 8:00- 11:30 (i know i’m disgusted lol) - 9 - 9:30

28. Last song you listened too: idk- right now i’m listening to you see me- childish gambino - already answered 

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: to start college and meet new people, and study abroad next year- to move into the dorms next year and the cruise this summer - To move out of the house and into my own apartment

30. Last time you saw your all of your siblings at the same time: don’t have any

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: that i am staying in a dorm this year- nothing really right now, maybe that i had more close friends that were older, but it will happen in time. - I am not sure, maybe that I am good mentally and that COVID wasn’t a thing

32. What are you listening to right now: tv- music - youtube

33. When is the last time you had sex?: never- 11 days ago i think? - two days ago

34. Who’s getting on your nerves right now: idk no one- hmm my friends that cancelled on me ugh - me being lazy 

35. Most visited webpage: idk- youtube probably - same

36. Favorite colour: i like a lot of them- green - lol idk pink or white

37. Nicknames: none- same

38. Relationship Status: single- single - in a relationship

39. Zodiac sign: scorpio

40. Male or female: female

41. Primary school: green valley and martin luther king.

42. Secondary School: Mountain view and K.O knudson

43. High school/college: Foothill, Online, and Nevada state, then foothill again lol.

44. Eye colour: green

45. Hair colour: blonde

46. Height: 5′6 or 5′7

47. Do you have a crush on someone: nah- no

48. What do you like about yourself: my eye color- same and my stomach most of the time

49. Piercings: two on my ear- three on each ear

50. Tattoos: none- none

51. Righty or lefty: righty in everything but dance and acro

FIRSTS:

52. First Word: i think dada

53. First piercing: ear

54. First best friend: jacy

55. First hookup: none- bruno lol

56. First Bestfriend: jacy

57. First Phone: pantec

58. First CD/Album : idk

RIGHT NOW:

59. Eating: nothing- nothing -nothing

60. Drinking: water- nothing - water

61. I’m about to: do nothing, maybe eat some cereal- to get ready for bed or clean or do laundry it depends - nothing really, maybe take a shower after this

62. Listening to: tv- music - youtube

63. Waiting for: something interesting to happen- thursday to come - Bruno to come back home

YOUR FUTURE:

64. Want kids? maybe- yes - yes

65. Get married? yes- yes - yes

66. Career: idk yet- psychologist/ therapist - educational psychologists

WHICH IS BETTER:

67. Lips or eyes: eyes- both but prob eyes

68. Hugs or kisses: never kissed before, so i can’t really decide- hugs i love hugs, but kisses can be nice sometimes - both but I like hugs most

69. Shorter or taller: taller

70. Older or Younger: older

71. Romantic or spontaneous: both..- both

72. Nice stomach or nice arms: ugh.. both. i really like both.- armssss

73. Sensitive or loud: um, idk?- same

74. Hook-up or relationship: relationship- same, but it depends i guess

75. Sweets or Chocolate: um.. sweets probably- sweets

HAVE YOU EVER:

76. Kissed a stranger: no- technically no - I guess kind of technically yes

77. Drank hard liquor: no- yes 

78. Lost glasses/contacts: no- i don’t have any

79. Had sex: no- yes

80. Broken someone’s heart: no- no - no

81. Been so scared you cried: probably- yeah

82. Been arrested: no- no - no

83. Turned someone down: um, i think i have kind of lol.- yeah

84. Cried when someone died: yes

85. Fallen for a friend: no- no - no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

86. Yourself: sometimes- i guess - sure

87. Miracles: eh, idk maybe - same - maybe eh

88. Love at first sight: eh not really- nah

89. Heaven: maybe- same

90. Santa Clause: no

91. Kiss on the first date: no- haha i have so yes

92. Angels: maybe- eh maybe

93. How would you label yourself?: idk- same

94. Someone You Pray Everyday For: no one

95. Did you sing today: no- maybe

96. Who From All Your Ex’s have You Cared The Most About: none- don’t have one

97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? idk really- idk

98. Out Of Everything In The World What Do You Wish For: to be able to eat whatever i want when i want it and stay my normal weight haha, that would be fun. Or to have an infinite amount of money. or that i could read minds on command.- to be truly happy and to be free and have fun all the time

99. Are you afraid of falling in love? not really- nah

100. Do you like the way you look? eh, not really. maybe sometimes.- sure