Anyone else go feral seeing Din on his knees, with two men struggling to hold him down?
CORRECTION
It was actually 4 men, two holding him down, and two others holding the cables attached to him, cause Din is a big boy.
🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
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not sure how to phrase this but something i have been ruminating on recently is that xue yang is strangely fragile. obviously he is also incredibly resilient. he survived, and continues to survive, impossible things. he has a million barriers between himself and the world, but none of this actually matters when it comes to what he feels. everything is personal to him. everything pierces straight through all that armor and goes right to his battered heart, the heart that no one else believes he has. that even he is not fully cognizant of. the world strikes and strikes and strikes and so he strikes and strikes and strikes back, even (especially) when the wound is something other people would not think worthy of retribution.
xue yang would never realize this- would be outraged at the concept of it- but the way everything, everything is something to rally a defense against is in itself a form of fragility. he does not know how to let go of things, or let them pass him by. passivity is death. so he is ruthlessly cruel and violent. he projects himself as a lunatic untouchable by anything you might possibly do to him, and on some level he even believes this. but in actuality he is one raw emotional wound. he never learned to separate himself from his emotions, much less process them. the volatility is not so much insanity as it is the constant lashing out of an animal in a trap, and the trap is the world, and the trap is himself, and he is never going to get out. and like so much else, this pain is just part of the background radiation of his life. it hardly registers. to be able to register the hurt, you would have to be able to register a time in which you were not hurt.
i feel like it is a fragility that could blossom into such tenderness, given exactly the right set of circumstances. how at the very first touch of softness in his life he fell into a domesticity from which he never recovered. how much was there, still, to be salvaged from the cruelty. on some level i am always thinking about the little apple bunnies. about the meal for daozhang and the straw in a-qing's bed.
it was too little, too late. it shattered like glass when the world intruded back in. but the tenderness was there. no one, least of all xue yang, knows what might have happened had it been unearthed in him any sooner.
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that scene in ch 38 where astrid is all, ‘no wonder why hiccup likes you’ as a passing comment straight to jack’s face and it completely flies over his head was so wauuuughioiahhoouuiaeuaguu… especially bc afterwards, jack goes off on an emotional spiel about how much hiccup means to him, how he’s afraid of hiccup knowing how he feels, how much he wishes with all his heart that there was another way, how he would give up everything if it meant staying with hiccup and how much it crushes him that he just can’t — i was plucking my hair out my follicles one by one bc how can someone be so oblivious at the fact that they are so obviously at the deep end like (to quote hiccup) thor almighty, jackson overland frost you are in the trenches
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gotta show off my latest mech, FRENZIED ALACRITY / CRESTING DAWN, a super speedy pulse blade user i've had a lot of fun making decals for (more screencaps under the cut i couldn't pick one)
look at my gradients boy
the warning was gonna say HIGH SPEED ACTUATION but that's a long word to fit on the mech
worked too hard on the mri scan decal for where i wound up putting it.... you really have to look for it
quick balteus s rank to make sure i was happy with the build and the appearance :3 i am definitely still a reverse joint legs stan but i like how zippy you can get on the alba legs
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