CHORBY SOUL : SHARK BAIT

My piece for the Fashion & Food zine

how did jaylen react to blaseball ending. how did she cope. one moment shes vaulted and unstable and may never see anyone she cared about again and the next everyone is freed from playing blaseball including her. surely thatd kinda fuck you up after months of separation and fear right

edit: hi theres a lot more of you than i expected. uh. i do commissions. sorry our budgets been shit for like 2 months im kinda desperate rn

ID: Digital drawing of Nevaeh Flapper from Blaseball kneeling and blowing into a long trumpet pointed at the Earth. Text in the background reads "bwaaa" (elongated to fill up the entire background.) End ID.

the tumpet

inspired by this post

i've been putting this off for a while, but here's my pitching machine IRM. template by @littleguysdaily

ID: a drawing of a smiling short-haired brown dog looking off to the side, with one leg lifted and tail almost straight like it's coming out of a pointing pose. the template says NAME: Pitching Machine, SKILL: projectile vomiting b(l)aseballs. in the bottom left corner, there's a rating system for the following traits: CHUCKABILITY, ENGAGING, SQUISHINESS, SPLORPABILITY, BONES, and MEDIA LITERACY. all of them are rated with 1 to 3 stars, except for bones, which is rated with 1 to 3 skulls. for pitching machine, her chuckability is 3 out of 3 stars, engaging is 2 out of 3 stars, squishiness is 1 out of 3 stars, splorpability is 3 out of 3 stars, bones is 2 out of 3 stars, and media literacy is 0 out of 3 stars. there's a colored-in radar chart in the bottom right corner that shows the same data but on a chart. chuckability is at the top, and the rest are situated clockwise around the hexagonal chart. /end ID.

(psst. secret version under the cut)

ID: the same exact chart as above, except her chuckability rating has so many stars it goes off the page. the chuckability section in the radar chart goes off the chart and extends all of the way to the top of the canvas. /end ID

alt jessjay! (these are @riseinviolence's alt thoughts<3)

ID: A digital illustration of alternate Jessica Telephone and Jaylen Hotdogfingers from the video game Blaseball. They're standing pressed against each other, with Jaylen in front of Jessica's shoulder. Jessica is taller, smiling down at her and leaning on a bat. She's wearing a Dallas Steaks jersey. Jaylen is rubbing her own shoulder, looking off to the side with a straight face. She's wearing a Seattle Garages jersey. Both of them are also noticeably scarred.

my blaseball winter exchange piece for @squidbroom :D song about jaylen! lyrics under the cut :)

why should i care about you when you don’t care about me? you only care about a person i don’t know how to be

is your life something you’d miss? why would i want your release? i don’t like that you don’t like that i don’t want any peace

i never asked you for this the person wanting was you you have to live with the fact that i’m not "living" with you

you say that i came back wrong you mean that i’m not the same was that not telegraphed? i think we both know who's to blame!

i don’t owe you anything, no, no you don't get to tell me so i’m not in the debt of someone who never met me did you really think you could take me alive? cause i’m not!

i’m not alive anymore! i don’t play by your rules, of course what did you expect when you opened up that door? cause you get what you pay for i’m what you paid for! am i not?!

and i wont stop!

a zine I made about my experiences with Blaseball and where it traveled with me.

sorry for no ID, there is too much text to fit in the boxes, but there is a plaintext version at the link

PARK IT! A long while back I made around 50 pixels art "blattlers" of various Blaseball characters. These vary in quality as I improved and also might need to be clicked on if you are using desktop to see them with unblurred pixels. Many were commissions or requests but I no longer have the information of who they were for. They were posted to twitter but not to here so I am archiving them here now.

we're SO back @blaseball

is anyone like... reselling garages cassettes... specifically the unstable cassette... i have a bunch of the others but missed out on that one and now idk if the garages will ever start selling them againnnn

NAIL! BAT!

allison’s the love of my life, the light in my darkness, my darling. blushin and kickin my feet rn

also because i saw a post about some parallels between derrick krueger and jaylen: i cannot be consoled knowing that they both have different variations of "you were the best if only for a moment" (hotdogfingers got incinerated as a wonderful pitcher and came back mediocre, krueger came out of the black hole during coronation as a wonderful pitcher after being mediocre and then blaseball just Ended)

ID: Digital drawing of Nevaeh Flapper from Blaseball. Flapper is a humanoid angel with six wings. She is holding a baseball in one hand and a bat in the other. A small halo of light surrounds her head in the background. End ID.

be not afraid (said to myself while trying to figure out how to draw and shade the wings)

here's my blaseball winter exchange piece for @zayphora! i miss the gamma 4 garages 🥺

🎵 GOOD MORNING, WELCOME TO THE WORLD, SUNSHINE!

welcome back to the land of the living, derrick krueger! it’s been awhile, huh?

derrick interp by marn @charaznablescanontoyota who won the blaseball blorbo lottery today. lyrics from GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE by The Narcissist Cookbook.

Listen, am I glad to see all these players again? Heck yeah! But they keep falling on my car and at this point I can NOT afford more repairs!

Goodwin Morin: Pitcher for the Garages, Lineup on the Vault Legends and More!