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#sarcasam
monachopsis-11 · 1 year
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Teacher: You should stop being so anxious!
Me: Oh my god you’re right! Why didn’t I think of that brilliant solution sooner? 😐
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whumper waking up strapped to a chair bound by duck tape in a small, ominous, dimly lit room they've never seen before. Parallel to whumpee whom was holding an unsettlingly large knife.
"after all this time," a layer of sweat stuck to whumpees face and tears rolled down the sides of their tender bruised and beaten cheeks "I finally get my revenge, after all those months of torture and agony,"
Whumpee stepped closer to whumper, resting the cold sharp steel of the dagger against whumpers throat. "I get to make you feel the same terror I did every night, unable to sleep, or eat or drink. I get to make you plea for mercy as I did."
"you don't scare me." Whumper spat
"then why's your heart beating so fast?"
"cause you're kinda cute like this."
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wheelersblue · 1 year
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That's a nice, heterosexual way to sit 😇
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jewishtwig · 1 year
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You can’t just decide you’re Jewish. You are either born Jewish or you aren’t. Judaism is an ethnoreligion and it is not possible to convert to an ethnicity.
Wow! To think, Halakha is being rewritten in my inbox! What an honor you’ve bestowed upon me!
We should alert everyone immediately! This is going to cause significant upset! Think of all the Talmuds that will need to be edited and reprinted!
Great sage, please come off anon so we can all learn from your wealth of knowledge! I can only assume this view must be divinely inspired for you at assert it so boldly against the standing Halakha! I cannot wait to learn more!
I am so curious, wise one, what do we do now that we know Ruth is not Jewish? That would of course mean her decedents (so, all of Beit David) are not Jewish. This is going to cause quite the stir!
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sulasnsleep · 8 months
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“Sarcasm helps me overcome the harshness of the reality we live, eases the pain of scars and makes people smile.”
— Mahmoud Darwish
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reginataylor86 · 6 months
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Now I KNOW, this is a pic of her standing in front of a high powered microscope. HOWEVER, when I saw it in the small thumbnail, and now for the rest of time, it looks like she’s standing in front of a sarcastic geometric polar bear. … 🤷‍♀️
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the-crip-castellan · 1 year
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oh how fun, another dose of "your legs aren't working"
just a great way to end my friday
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humor-experiment-lab · 8 months
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They want you to play better.
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We all seen the “Glados is Chell mom” theory, and its wrong
Chell is Glados mom is the real theory
In Portal 2 when Glados and Chell find the Cave and Caroline portrait, Glados ask Chell to stop so she can look at it, but Chell ignores her and keeps on waking, which is a very mom thing to do
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gnoll-king · 2 years
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This says so much about our society...
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jurassicsickfics · 10 months
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A sarcastic, smart mouthed character's responses to being asked, "Are you crying?"
1: "No, I'm singing. Pretty ain't it?"
2: "Of course not. If I was crying you'd see tears. Oh wait."
3: "No, I'm cleaning out my eyes."
4: *just stares at them, tears running down their face* "Take a wild guess."
5: "Well, either that or eyes can sweat now. Sure hope I'm crying. "
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¿Y qué si no es ahí? Igual, ya sé que no pertenezco a ningún lugar.
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liliumsims · 9 months
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Selwyn Kane:
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fluffy-subby · 1 year
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Seems counter productive but you gotta follow the recipe exactly right🤷🏽‍♀️ 🤭🤭🤣🤣😂
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peppermintreese · 1 year
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AYO @dontvap0rdawave LOOK HOW DA DESPISES EVANGELION
And the pictures I commissioned you awhile back got censored tooo
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Did I mention DA has something against the Prism, cat, and bingus
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This is homophOBIC
(This is all a joke n sarcasm don’t take this seriously)
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