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#said something else right after to lighten the mood bc i was too embarrassed) but like. lol still. this all sucks TREMENDOUSLY. i literally
pepprs · 2 years
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hi mutuals. ive been gone all day in capstone hell in part bc my advisor is basically making me restructure the entire thing and it’s literally due on saturday. also if i look at a screen for another second my eyes will explode out of my face i think. like screens are so weird and 3d to me rn and it hurts my eyes and is too up close but also im pretty sure i have a lazy eye now so that’s probably why lol. but I have a week of this left at least atp except i can’t possibly ahve a week of this left because i literalt graduate a week from today. i feel like setting everything on fire
#purrs#what is it with me and my teachers / professors changing my entire project at the last minute LOL. throwback to ap art i. senior year of#high school when i was so fucking stressed out and depressed about graduating (hmmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and i had spent literally ALL YEAR do#doing my stupjd breadth and composition. or whatever it was like the names of the 2 stupid categories w head to do and i spent the whole yEA#year doing paintings for my compositon and i didn’t finish them bc i bit off more than i could chew (hmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and got permissi#permission from her to do my last like 3-4 paintings as collages in my sketchbook and then i had to give her mt sketchbook to like physicall#physically handle them and grade them (which was mortifying bc mt sketchbooks are like my diary basically) and after she gave it back she sa#sat me own and told me that she thought i had a better chance of getting a high score if in just used my sketchbook collages + some RANDOM#SKETCHBOOK PAGES that i had just been doing for fun and in my free time. instead of the paintings. thst i had spent all year fucking#murdering myself over. and iwas so angry but i went with it and i only got a 4 LMFAOOOOOOOO like this is just a repeat of that where he’s li#like you have to redo your entire fucking soi and break down everything etc etc and i swear to god i’ll get like a C. and at this point i do#don’t care. i almost broke down crying to him i was trying so hard to hold it together but i was telling him how i am worried about changing#so much of this right now not because I don’t care but because im exhausted and i DESPERATELY want and need to be done bc it’s been like#2 weeks of this at least. and he said nothing to that (in part bc i didn’t even look at him when i said it bc i was too embarrassed and bc i#said something else right after to lighten the mood bc i was too embarrassed) but like. lol still. this all sucks TREMENDOUSLY. i literally#am graduating in one week and it feels like i still have a month left and i have no fucking idea honwim gonna do this bc the stupid paper i#have been trying to write for the last 2 days he basically told me i have to redo in its entirety AND THE THING IS ITS 10 FUCKING PERCENT OF#MY ETIRE GRADE LKKE THIS IS SO STUPID HELPPPPPPPPPPPP help. this is so stupid and my faculty mentors can’t help me and im like ok maybe i ai#will go lie in the street right now. also not counting seeing glimpses of my roommates i haven’t been around another human being in person I#in a week and 2 days and ive only left my room 3#3x in that time span too all to go like take out the trash or some shit. so im absolutely done with everything LOL there is no way this#project is happening and i want to just dump the entire thing unfinished and say please just take it i can’t do it anymore i literally can’t#him: don’t even worry about the time rn. just pretend you have infinite time. me: crying cat meme. LIKE SIR I WOULD LIKE TO BE DONE THIS#VERY INSTANT! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s the way i have literally created THREE#fucking collections of literature in the course of doing this project and it still isn’t good enough LOLLL like i appreciate you trying to h#help me do well and give me time etc bu you have to understand i need to be done with undergrad right this second or i will explode
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one-real-imonkey · 3 years
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Mhmmmmmmm, prompts you say? How about......the commander batch end up in the past with the TM except they were all doing something (one was sleeping, the other was unconscious, one was doing reports, one in the middle of a battle, heck, if you include Fox he could have been having a 'meeting (free interpretation) with Palpatine! Maybe the end up as teenagers! Who knows!
In strike bc I haven't seen you write a lot about clones sooooo....yeah, feel fre to ignore this!
Oh the clones my boys!!!!!!
They deserve love and affection and absolutely I’ll write for them. I’m rubbing my hands together and cackling like a super villain. 
They’re all their natural ages, as if they bandy been aged in advance.
———
They’d shown up a mile out from Jasters camp, discovered by a patrol.
Six boys, young boys, some armed, some injured, all almost identical to his ad.
Five of them were, if he had to guess, quintuplets, about 13, while the youngest looked about two or three years younger than them, his Jango’s age.
They were brought to the med tent, and Jaster called at the same time. He met them at the edge of the camp, let the little ones introduce themselves as they walked towards the tent.
Cody, the first introduced himself as, and Jaster noted the scar curling down the side of his face. Then Wolffe who was missing an eye, Ponds who was both bald and injured, Bly with yellow facial tattoos and Fox, who had no definable features Jaster could tell, but more hunched shoulders and bags under his eyes. And the youngest, Rex, with shaved blond hair.
They were not normal ade. The way they walked, watched each other’s sixes, the way their eyes scanned every inch of every room and how Rex’ika was kept to the middle of their group as they were escorted to the med tent. They moved like experienced soldiers, not a group of scared ade.
He stays to the side as they’re checked over, and though they’re obviously not sure where they are or whether to trust Jaster, they clearly want answers, and to compare notes.
“It has to be Force nonsense,” one of them, Wolffe, was saying, “how else could we have travelled so far in the blink of an eye. I’ll admit, it was a shock to go from a firefight to suddenly being alone with you all.”
“A blink of your eye,” Ponds threw back while the baar’ur bandaged his head wound, “I was unconscious and only woke up because you were yelling.”
“I nearly shot Wolffe, I’d been in a fight too.” It was concerning that Bly and Wolffe had both been in firefights, firefights, they were ade!
“Rex was asleep.” Cody chipped in, smirking slightly at the embarrassed and annoyed look that flashed across his vod’ikas face.
“Hey, I'd been awake for over a day, and so had you, so you're the one the medics would be angry at. He was doing his reports, because everyone would simply die if he waited until the morning.”
The baar’ur laughed softly, partly for the teasing and partly to lighten the mood with such awful things being insinuated by their comments, and gestured Jaster over, signalling that they were pretty much done, except for Fox’ika, who’s eyes they were checking having noticed his clear headache.
“It’s fine, baar’ur, you don’t need to worry about my headache.”
“Ad...”
“Nyac. It almost always comes after meetings with our... with our boss, it’s just stress and tiredness, I'm fine.”
Those words were oh so concerning coming from such a small child, and he could see the same concern not only on the face of his baar’ur, but also Fox’ika’s vode. He doubted boss was the right word for the person this ad’ika had been meeting. Not with the comments they’d been making, the way they stood and sat and walked.
Still, the baar’ur backed off.
“So, ade, now that you’ve been treated, I think we need to talk.”
“Yeah.” Cody, Jaster was starting to think he was their leader. “We should. Like why you keep looking at Rex.”
Had he been? The ad looked so similar to Jango, really, it was just the hair. Still, they all looked so very concerned to have any focus on their vod’ika, and he needed to be careful about that. The last thing he wanted to do was upset or scare them.
“To start with, it’s good to meet you all, my name is Jaster Mereel...”
The tent flaps opened and as if summoned his ad’ika slipped in,
“And this is my ad, Jango Fett.”
There was a second of silence, then a flurry of hand signs, before stressed little Fox swore, colourfully.
“Language!”
In another situation he might have slapped a hand over his mouth in shock of what he’d just said. He hadn’t meant to say it, but they all looked and sounded so similar to his ad, it had just slipped out.
And now they were all staring at him incredulously.
Jango looked half way between astonished at the language and annoyingly like he planned on using it.
He could imagine the ribbing he was going to get, how that conversation would go. 
‘So Jaster how was your day.’ 
‘Oh fine,’ he’d reply, ‘ except that a bunch of stressed and battle worn ade appearing from thin air who look identical to my ad who taught him a whole new library of swears to use.’
He wasn’t too surprised that seeing Jango had shaken something in them, but their story soon slipped out. Time travel, war, messed up ageing. Children sent into war, whether they were physically adults or not, it was horrific, and more so when you could see them like this.
Now they were their real ages, the ages they would be without the enhanced ageing. 
They were warriors and soldiers who’d seen the most brutal of war and death, and they were ade who deserved love and affection and so many other things they’d so clearly received from each other and none others as they’d grown up too fast.
These ade had been raised by demagolka and monsters, and his Jan’ika had been a part of it. Not intentionally, one of them had said, at least, they didn’t think so. Most of them had never even met him, and the one who had, Cody, claimed it had only been once. It was not a path he planned on letting his ad walk again, willingly or not.
It was no burden to adopt them, to claim them as his own and swear he’d give them a better childhood than they’d had. The biggest argument was over combat, because they were soldiers, and they wanted to fight, but Ka’ra they were so young. The quintuplets, they were only just 13, and when they were a little more adjusted and settled, they could start taking small missions, with adults and supervision. Rex’ika would have to wait, he was just too small. He and Jango could start at the same time, not before.
He would have been Demagolka to decide otherwise.
No child should look so grateful to be told they were wanted, that they had a home and loving aliit. No ad should look so disbelieving. 
Jango looked over the moon to have new vode, as Jaster had predicted, worming his way into their little group and cuddling in. It was cute, and clearly none of them were capable of denying a vod’ika, even if he wasn’t one of the ones they knew.
Jaster isn’t surprised by the way Jan’ika looks at Rex, not only could they be twins, but Rex has the hair he knows Arla had, and though wary and watchful of both Jango and the rest of the tent, and likely anything they could hear happening outside of it, they were happy to hold Jan’ika too.
Jaster’s aliit had just grown larger, but he couldn’t complain. It would be a journey and a challenge, their horrific pasts creating problems he likely couldn’t even foresee yet, but he couldn’t regret it.
And he knew they’d be adored and protected by his people too.
———
Thanks for promoting, I loved it. They all deserve better. I wanted to add something where they saw Jango and assumed he was another Vod who’d traveled, maybe part of Rex’s old batch before they were decommissioned and his moved to their group, but I couldn’t fit it in. But this worked well too.
Also absolutely Palpabastard was messing with Fox.
Thanks for reading.
Inbox still open, prompts or headcanons or asks. (-:
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b612sunsets · 3 years
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Even if it isn’t always flowers, we had a lawful family moment during episode 7 and I’d like to discuss it. Families fight too, it’s part of caring and what doesn’t kill them only makes them stronger (the reference lol). First, Yohan is overprotective with Elijah not only because of the fire or how much both of them lost and were hurt by it, but also bc he projects his own insecurities and past experiences onto her. His words are his thoughts and how much he was let down during his life by his father, the seemingly kind maid, the corrupt selfish politicians and so on. “Aren’t you tired yet?” Yohan is tired of it, has been for a long time. “Don’t trust in kindness, don’t let other people approach you without suspecting they want something back from you”. People with a past like Yohan tend to either make people go through the same thing as he did or try their hardest to avoid it happening with other people. His case is the latter.
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And then, what happens? The only exception (cause you are my only exceptiooon) to what Yohan just warned Elijah about. The guy that shakes his world and makes him take back his words, blurring the line he traced. Gaon interrupted to defend Elijah. Yohan, of course got defensive. Yohan likes to be the one in control of things but Gaon is brave enough to challenge him and make him question some of his decisions that otherwise he wouldn’t think twice about the consequences:
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Gaon makes Yohan falter when he speaks like that, right? :’) He asked earnestly for Yohan to be more sensible and honest with his true feelings and hidden thoughts.
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Know what else is funny, Yohan? The fact that even after Gaon does all the things you would punch someone else for even trying to imply them or meddling with your things, you’re the one not kicking Gaon out of YOUR HOUSE no matter how much time it has been, huh? Gaon can get away with anything and that’s a power you gave to him. So deal with it now lol The three of you fight but aren’t able to stay away from each other. Yohan isn’t the only one affecting and changing Gaon, they’re just doing it in different areas of their lives.
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The way Gaon gave Yohan a disapproving look and put a “wall” between them while doing so... made Yohan reflect and feel more strongly the distance his actions created. He seemed to feel guilty and regret it right after because let's face it: that’s the only two people left that he gives a single shit about in the world and he failed them. It must be specially hard when comparing to the days where there’s nothing separating them and they’re just happy to be in each other’s company like the morning they had breakfast. When they’re a real family.
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Gaon decided to open up and comfort Elijah, to let her know they're the same. That’s why he can understand her side and defend it in front of Yohan. Yohan knows that too. Elijah gets embarrassed and the two of them joke around to lighten up the mood:
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A nice detail: Gaon is so sweet and considerate of Yohan that even after the argument, he still wanted to remind Elijah of how much she resembles Yohan. He tried to point out (in a subtle way) one of their similarities because despite the differences, the three of them do share things in common that they haven't been able to find in anyone else. Like their lonely and painful past and now a house filled with love and care thanks to a new found family. And that’s what matters in the end.
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Then, it was Yohan’s turn to listen and follow Gaon’s words on trying to be more honest and open with Elijah. Yes, because if it wasn’t clear yet, Yohan does care about Gaon’s opinion even if he doesn’t always agree with him in subjects like politics and law. Some examples where we can see that, is during the court trials with Gaon sitting next to him and the press conference, he always looks at Gaon’s direction for validation and to know if his reaction is positive or not.
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Aww, Yohan just wants to be the favorite dad too! Gaon is their bridge, someone they care about and can mediate their conflicts (pls Yohan is so cute in scenes like that, I can’t take it, I would hug him right then and say I forgive him. Yes, I’m weak, don’t judge hehe)
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Mission failed, but we’re proud of you for taking the first step 👏 you will get there someday.
And finally, Gaon worrying about Yohan’s safety. He talked for Elijah here because Yohan is her last family member and Gaon knows what it is like to completely lose a family, he doesn’t want Elijah to go through that. And it’s not said but heavenly implied from everything we know that Gaon would suffer too if anything happened to Yohan. That’s why he tries to understand and defend him no matter the circumstances, and in the end finally decided to help Yohan after being proven once again that Yohan does have feelings and someone that both of them want to protect, besides each other. (as the good husbands and parents they are).
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sugar-petals · 4 years
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Your First Date With Baekhyun
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:: bbh x sm apprentice!reader
words. 10k
warnings ⚠️ idol au hc, pining, brief angst, eventual car sex 👀, tw light injuries bc baek is clumsy in love, oral fixation, finger sucking, rough sex, making out
↳ NOTE. here we go again with the slow burn ✊🔥
It all starts with a divine act of clumsiness. 
An accident, completely out of the blue.
Who is surprised, what else could it be.
Ever since Baekhyun violently bumped into you from behind in the SM cafeteria to avoid Mark spilling red hot Americano on him… life has never been the same. 
That you walked in on him walking around mighty topless, with you wanting to clear the dance practice room many hours after work three times already does not help.
It’s always the same chain of events. He practices for longer than the others and gets sweaty, pulls off his shirt, pauses the music for a five-minute break. That’s unintentionally making it seem like everyone is already gone and the room is empty — you are deceived by it every time, and he almost gets a heart attack himself. We know how easily embarrassed Baekhyun is with showing skin by accident, outside of any shower stalls that is, let alone being caught stripping by himself. 
The first time he screams and you scream, off you run after quickly shutting the door. He tries his best to cover himself up with his hands, but to no avail. Lucas, Kai, and Johnny are no longer the only Magic Mikes under this rowdy fucking roof anymore. Even if you turned around fast, you saw more than a whole lot. 
You know how scared Baekhyun is by surprises, he gets all fidgety. Even after four whole minutes, he still sits with the music off breathing harder than he did from powering through four jointbreaking ligament-snappers I mean EXO choreographies. 
Lot of thoughts on his mind, lot of blood pumping through him. Baekhyun can hear a pretty hefty heartbeat pound in his ears. Eventually, he shakes his head at himself and does switch the music back on. But even that doesn’t distract him, nor can he concentrate on the moves. He keeps on asking himself — what the hell is wrong, what is this, why does he act like that? 
So, he ends up sneaking out of the room to call it a day. You were waiting in the nearby corridor to do the cleaning after he left. But now, you hide behind a shelf with props and miscellanea to avoid him. 
Of course, Baekhyun comes to grab a water bottle from said cupboard. Well, oh shit. He has his shorts on, and his calves are literally 20 inches away from you. He doesn’t see you crouching down there, but your pulse is going through the roof now, too. 
In fact, not even the days when Taeyong is walking around the company in a sexy as hell crop top could cause you such a panic. And that is the highest possible bar already. The average apprentice almost faints.
There’s pungent sweat that can knock you out of your socks… and then there’s sexy sweat scent mixed with men’s deodorant. Baekhyun leaves the latter after rushing out of the corridor. It’s even more intense in the practice room, if not absolutely unbearable. Oh boy. Pheromones, please no.
It’s almost as if you’re taking a bath in cologne. You’re getting nauseous and tingly from how it gets to you. You can hardly focus on scrubbing the mirror. If only the guy knew what horniness he is causing just by infusing the air, what the fucking fuck.
The second time, he jerks up again, but tries to explain himself. But so do you, ending up with a mutual, stuttering word spill in sync. 
Neither of you understood what the other was saying because you were too busy with a knee-jerk dialogue. Anxious all over, you quickly leave and eventually end up hiding behind the cupboard again. The new comeback track blasts even louder in the practice room. 
The third occasion, you no longer flinch at each other and laugh a little, mighty embarrassed still, but apologize with knowing eyes. This time, you enter the room after a small „Can I?“ and at least manage to clear some noodle boxes and unused towels from the backup dancers away, and pin a new schedule to the door. 
Baekhyun quickly pulls over his plain white tee and keeps on mumbling sorry, sorry like he’s Super Junior, practically scraping the ground with his hair because he bows so deep. 
You’ve never seen him this awkward. Instead of his usual one-liners and most effortless conversation starters, he resorts to switching on the music again after frantically looking everywhere but in your direction. He sings his lines right along, getting back into the routine’s intricate steps. 
Strange. 
Very strange.
All day, he is impulsive with lightening up just about any situation. One sentence, hook line and sinker; the mood alleviates. Not this time. He’s ignoring you now that you’re in the room.
The truth is: Baekhyun can’t help but set his pupper eyes on you in all other occasions already, especially when you’re busy at a distance. And it’s making him crazy. Next day at the cafeteria, he deliberately arrives late so he can queue way, way behind you. 
For the first time in all glorious epochs K-Pop history, he would let Sehun enter the line before him so he would have a shield. „Maknaes first“ is his brief comment, and Sehun thinks that Baekhyun must squarely confuse today with his birthday.
And fate says… sike. Two minutes later, a teary Mark rushes toward you and loudly apologizes for the Americano disaster. „Baekhyun was not being impolite, it was me!“
As he says just that, he turns, points right at Baekhyun’s tomato red head peeking out from behind Sehun’s shoulders, and bows to him. 
The whole cafeteria is witness, including Lee Soo Man.
And SHINee, who will have gossip material for five weeks because of this. Key is already taking notes. 
And BoA — who’s giggling because she’s seen it all in the business and knows exactly what’s going on with Baekhyun and you. Oh. Lord.
Baekhyun wants to sink into the ground right then and there. He’s been found out again. Of course he has to step out from his lair now and bow back to Mark, take the blame and explain the whole incident all over, and comfort him with a string of appeasing words. Which he hates for four reasons at the same time. He embarrassed Mark, himself, disturbed you the way he bumped into your back, and now you saw him hiding from… precisely you. Little does he know you did, too. 
Baekhyun quickly retreats to sit next to Sehun once again after Mark has calmed down and he, being the senior as always, has performed another 180° bow to you in front of the entire staff and idol audience, causing his oversized shirt to slip downward, way to his armpits. 
Goodness gracious.
BoA is this close to shouting „get a room“ upon seeing Baekhyun stand in front of you with his stomach all bare until he has hastily tucked his shirt back into this place. Fast as it happens, you can’t hide your reaction face. 
Chanyeol, sitting at a nearby table, does a telling reaction noise himself, and you can tell he’s read the situation to a T. Even worse, he’s whistling. You can fool a lot of people, but not Park „Radar“ Chanyeol. He’s a himbo incarnate, but this guy’s emotional intelligence is too damn strong, and he knows Baekhyun inside out. Oh shit, man.
The next ten minutes are fraught with a weird, sonorous mumbling in the room. Lee Soo Man doesn’t really get it, thank God. But the meaning of Baekhyun silently cowering behind Sehun while eating his kimchi stew is more than obvious to half of the people around. Baekhyun never fucking acts like this, even when he’s sad.
It’s like something is pushing the two of you into humiliating situations like that ever since you started to work at SM since last May. Literally Baekhyun can’t stop apologizing to you all day because he’s suddenly clumsy or the strangest situations happen.
Nope, he doesn’t do it on purpose. But yes, he finds himself enjoying your attention. So what is he going to do? This keeps being stuck on his mind. Especially because half of EXO, NCT, and SuperM is asking him what the hell is going on in three raging group chats at once.
And you? I don’t have to tell you how it feels like when Baekhyun stumbles over to squarely plant his cutesy baby face into your back. Firmly wrapping his hands around your waist on top of that not to fall over entirely. That feeling is locked into your muscle memory. And now, seeing him stripped down for the fourth time already? Goodbye to your sleep.
Special thanks to a jittery Mark for making this first hug I mean collision out of nowhere happen. Just to be sure: Mark really didn’t spill his coffee on purpose, nor did Baekhyun want to bump into you this hard. And we know Mark’s reflexes are usually fast enough to save the day. But he was about to host his first variety show all by himself, so you can imagine how shaky and distracted he was. And nobody will resent him — this is only all about you and Baekhyun… being the most repressed motherfuckers.
Baekhyun constantly almost-crashing into you somewhere or basically crawling on the ground before you makes for a second very shaky guy. What the hell is pulling him towards you wherever he goes? It’s even worse than Minseok moving one inch and accidentally smacking Baekhyun in the face.
It just goes on and on.
Following the second cafeteria embarrassment, the next Friday after lunch, you run into each other at the ground floor elevator exit so you would drop your fries. Yeah, extra crispy ones, with the best mayonnaise. Baekyhun has been feeling so guilty about his curse at this point that he orders extra fries for you at the cafeteria two times a week with his card. Which makes Chanyeol know dear Eros struck particularly hard. Because if he didn’t care, Baekhyun would pay it five times a week like he does for NCT every now and then. But if he does it only two times, something is at stake. He doesn’t want it to be apparent.
Baekhyun can’t even look you in the eye when he puts them on your tray. Instead, he quickly bows three times in a row and then disappears. This guy is a small puddle of blush. 
Lee Soo Man cites him into his room to say what’s wrong soon, but all Baekhyun can blurt out is that he didn’t sleep well and the comeback song won’t get into his head. Which is not a direct lie, so.
Whatever you do, Baekhyun appears out of the blue and falls to your feet. Only two days later, he returns from shooting an MV and slips right in front of your office. Pretty much because his feet stumble over his own pants. You put the paperwork aside and check what the hell is going on outside. A dizzy Baekhyun straight-up hit his head at your door. He declines you helping him up because he knows that your touch is probably gonna make him fully insane. He walks around with a forehead patch during the comeback stage and people online think it’s the latest trend.
Somebody save this man.
The universe just keeps on arranging the silliest things to make shit happen, huh.
At this point, Baekhyun developing a full-blown apprentice crush is as obvious as Lucas being tall.
Now, the reality is. This man is Hitch, the Date Doctor. He notoriously handles crowds, can get along with anyone he’s put together with on camera, helps the other members to juggle their love life whenever they have a problem. Chen is probably a married man because of Baekhyun in one way or another. He isn’t really shy normally in his own words. But when it comes to his own crushes — classic case of everybody’s cupid who gives good advice they would need the most. 
That Baekhyun is helpless with anything that digs beneath the surface of his usual interactions will show to you very soon. There’s tough Baekhyun, there’s cute Baekhyun, and then there’s an utterly speechless little bean who has an internal meltdown when you do as much as take the stairs together. The difference is staggering. He’s fidgety, tense, makes himself even smaller and first and foremost: Is impressionable to an extreme.
In short: Baekhyun has fully converted into a fake maknae.
It’ll show in staff meeting conversations on trivial things about the schedule that he wing-mans everybody but himself when shit hits the fan. He stutters in your presence. Baek’s a mess. Chanyeol takes Baekhyun to the side and raises his brows at him at least five times a day, as in wanting to say: „Are you ever going to do something about it?“
Baekhyun dodges the answer each time and preoccupies himself with social media. Fans will later say that he hasn’t uploaded as many Twitter replies, Youtube videos, and Instagram snapshots in his whole career. And Baekhyun is already quite active online so you can tell how much he’s spamming.
Secretly… hoping you see his online activity. Which you do. 
You’ve memorized his five latest vlogs down to the cute little sound noises he’s making. Still, you hide behind the cupboard, and he is hiding behind an unsuspecting Johnny. Because Sehun is already grumbling about becoming a human shield, and Chanyeol would tease Baekhyun to the hell and back whenever you’re around.
Why does all of that happen? Why is he trying to escape? 
The answer is, Baekhyun feels an overpowering respect towards you. He doesn’t know where it’s coming from, it’s something you exude. To the point where he isn’t able to clown you the way he does with others. It’s literally that bad.
On top of that, Baekhyun is frustrated that whatever extroversion he can switch on during broadcasts, fan meets, and with the other members is suddenly failing him. He tries hard to fall back to his usual humor, but you being around makes him act much more erratic. And, surprisingly reserved, believe it or not.
Eye contact will make him break whatever character he’s trying to tune into for the sake of keeping it together. The exact opposite will happen. All the blushing and boiling hot sweat gives him away. Your own heated af face he doesn’t even notice.
In his mind, he’s going through any possible way of mannerisms to get your attention all while not embarrassing himself. He gives confident SuperM leader Baekhyun a shot, comedian Baekhyun, too, and he will don a pokerfaced version of himself as a last option whenever you are close. 
All unsuccessfully. He can’t keep the façade for long; he knows he’s acting strange and inconsistent that way. Do you even realize what you merely sitting in the same practice room is doing to this guy?  
As you can tell…
It’s up to you to hit on him. Finding an unmistakable balance between being breathtakingly forward and overly subtle. The right way to ask him out is somewhere in between. The way you gauge it, Baekhyun is turned off by all kinds of brazen approaches, but doesn’t want to be nudged with satin gloves and feathers either.
However, you end up playing too lowkey at first try because you’re just as nervous. You think, maybe it’s good to find out how interested in me he will admit he is. Which, given how much he tries to conceal his feelings, turns out to be a difficult idea.
And — Isn’t is crystal clear he likes you a whole lot by the way he tries to retreat from everyone but you? Recently, fleeing to stand behind Lucas. Who has the most hiding surface and won’t question what Baekhyun is doing there all the time, unlike Johnny.
So, how do you learn that your plan is a bad idea? You try to involve yourself in NCT’s Friday night truth-or-dare where Baekhyun always joins to mess with everyone.
But that weekend, he interestingly excuses himself to „practice English, it’s urgent!“. Off he goes as soon as he sees that you are part of the lineup, looking like he’s seen a ghost. 
So, that mission failed. You get Taeyong, Haechan, and Yuta twerking against you at the same time while wearing sailor moon outfits as a dare instead. 
However: You still learned something from this. The way that even Haechan’s wild gyrating and arguably great ass did not have a single effect on you tells you that you really want someone else really damn bad. Hell, if Yuta Nakamoto winds against you and you feel nothing—
And, something else has become apparent to you.
Professional he is, Baekhyun establishes rapport even with people he dislikes or feels neutral about, but when his more vulnerable feelings are in the game, he runs from them. 
Beside Chanyeol and BoA, you’re smart enough to begin seeing what clockwork ticks inside of him. When Baekhyun doesn’t try to get close to someone that’s around him so frequently, something is mighty wrong and his opinion about that someone must be an intense one. And it’s not because he hates that person, the opposite is the case. 
He’s almost less afraid of you than his worries of ruining it. 
But through what, you’re wondering, seriously. 
On the other hand, you get why Baekhyun keeps a viable distance. He knows it’s difficult to be associated with him in the way he wishes you were. Since people were looking at him and you so strange in the cafeteria, he even stopped practicing in the after hours. 
Two weeks later, he even quits buying you fries for lunch and eats in the recording studio instead. Chanyeol remains correct: Much is at stake.
After the truth-or-dare fail, you sit down in sobriety and go through your options. You get all sorts of grand ideas to reveal your feelings, but dismiss the majority of it. You have to start small, really small. This needs the utmost care. Especially because you don’t want to compromise him by accident any further, nor are you anywhere near as ballsy as you believe someone hitting on Byun Baekhyun needs to be. 
Truth be told: BoA would kick your ass for thinking that. And letting so many opportunities pass, as if you aren’t beating yourself up for it enough. Idol mode Baekhyun, well, he would be hard to approach indeed. But what is currently going on… he’s literally showing you his underbelly. He’s begging you to do something.
That he avoids even the lightest touch: More than telling to BoA’s knowing eye. He would be so easy to sway with just one sentence. She knows that at this point, Baekhyun is desperate. His yes would come so fast. You’re far from having faith in this. But you still try. You want this man.
Eventually, you rack your brain for anything understated you could do. 
Then, you get the idea. 
After a schedule briefing, Baekhyun recently said he dearly wishes he could eat fried noodles in the early evening because he’s craving something savory, meanwhile flashing a split-second glance at you. Maybe… You can discreetly bridge the gap by getting him food.
You’re part responsible for doing things like that in the company already so nobody will question you driving around with your little motorbike. 
If you think about it: That’s a good excuse to approach him frequently and visit his apartment. The move is calculated, but it’s what the situation requires. You can’t tell how Baekhyun will react, but if he looked at you this way, it’s worth a shot.
And so, you dare the impossible. You show up with a deliberately small portion of noodles after the last comeback stage, knock twice. He does open. You’re frozen up.
Uttering a hopefully neutral „You said you wanted this. I’ll also bring it tomorrow if you want,“ and then drive off again without even waiting for a reply from a very surprised-looking Baekhyun in PJs. 
Sweating like crazy, thank God your helmet and the upcoming dark of the night was hiding your red cheeks. Shit man, that was robotic as fuck! is what you’re thinking for the entire ride home. Another fail, you sure won’t return tomorrow. Now you can’t look him in the eye, either.
Meanwhile: 
The meal not only saves the day of Baekhyun’s usually very lackluster diet mood that comes out when he is by himself. It also makes him flustered and grateful, curling up on his couch. He couldn’t even remotely try to say no out of politeness or concerns for his food plan. Baekhyun breaks the chopsticks right away after closing the door. Today, his dog’s with him. Mongryong excitedly jumps up and down next to Baekhyun. Your visit was short and sweet, but it made two beans very happy.
In fact, he rips open the box and shoves a quarter of the content into his mouth in the blink of an eye. It’s not just how hungry he is. He’s also overwhelmed that you came to his house. He feels like it’d be the highest level of disrespect to throw it away to begin with, no matter how spartan his eating habits are supposed to be. 
He almost views this little take-out box as a part of you. He imagines how you listened to him talk, decided to drop by, bought it with your own money, and carried it all the way to him. All that extra effort and attention he spins back and forth in his head for the whole next week.
And, on the spot, Baekhyun is so taken aback that he starts deep cleaning his apartment at midnight as soon as he finishes his noodles. 
To your own initial shock, he also drops an envelope with money under your office door the next day. And you thought someone was sending threats.
You get the underlying message, though. This is something just between the two of you, and the envelope is a yes. For another meal. Actually, more than that. There are 30 sorted bills in it, each to buy one box since he knows where you get the food from and what the standard price is. 
Payment for one month in advance. Meetings for one month in advance. This fucker. 
And you thought your sweaty scene at his apartment left him confused or weirded out. Nope, he decided he wants this times thirty. Something you have to let sink in.
The next day you drive along at the same time, there’s nobody there. 
Because Baekhyun has left the door open. Now you can’t just speed away again. Nor do you really want to, for God’s sake. 
After putting your helmet down in the small entrance room, you find an anxiously waiting Baekhyun on the extremely cleaned up living room couch, sitting there with fidgeting feet like it’s a porn casting. 
The tension could kill. You put the box on the table before him like it’s England’s Crown Jewels. You want to calm him down so desperately, but don’t know how.
Given his sparkly eyes set on the food, that he wants to devour what you brought him right away is not hard to overlook. But he still seems hesitant. Insecure. Baekhyun doesn’t manage to say a full word which is the most surreal thing. You work up your voice and pass him the chopsticks in their paper packaging. „Pig out. You didn’t eat since 7AM.“
Again, he breaks the chopsticks. Trying hard not to do it too fast.
You sit opposite to him and revert back to professional mode. Talking about statistics from the comeback that Baekhyun hummingly acknowledges the way he does when you talk to EXO in meetings. 
He stuffs himself like his life depends on it. No stable eye contact from him. 
Both of you know that it’s not what you want to say. But even ten minutes in: Nothing about the cafeteria, the fries, the envelope, the topless incident, the forehead patch, nothing. Just you going on about details from work and him listening, nodding, chewing, making brief little remarks and using all his standard corporate phrases. „Ah, yes, EXO surely benefits from that.“ But it’s a start. You begin small. 
So far, so good. With every evening, the conversation becomes more and more two-sided and the meals bigger. A second envelope soon enters your office, covering the extra costs for the XXL boxes, your fuel, and another month worth of meals. Note: Only one and a half weeks in. 
Fuck, you got yourself into something big. Is it because his dog likes you?
You are starting to like babying him like that, even if you both keep it serious. Unusually so, but at least you don’t get into any more accidents with that suspense off your either shoulders. 
It’s not like that cute little face would leave you any chance in the first place. Baekhyun smiles shyly around you. His big laugh is sweeping, but the small things… lethal. Absolutely lethal.
His manager doesn’t like it, but his genius idol’s mochi factor is increasing since you bring him spicy, richer foods. Baekhyun declines most snacks he’s offered at work, hardly eats up at the cafeteria and gives it to Foodcas Xuxi instead, and even the stylists wished he would gain more weight without any results in their convincing acts. But when you bring him a large portion of extra al dente spaghetti or — as of recently — self-made black bean noodles, Baekhyun would consider it rude not to follow the call of the carbs. 
Interesting.
He eats even more aggressively when he knows you made the food yourself. 
Quickly enough, he pays either for take-out or ingredients meant for not one, but two people. You usually eat a little earlier than he does, but you would not trade the best luxury meal in the world eaten by yourself with being together in Baekhyun’s flat. To the average Joe, this would be the biggest hassle, but to you… there’s no way you can get enough of being around him so privately. You enjoy taking the time to buy food for him. Taking the time in general.
You’re not the only one.
I don’t have to tell you how Baekhyun has to fight getting a vicious hard-on with sitting opposite to you with your motorcycling jacket peeled down to the hip, right inside a staring-not staring-staring-not staring match while you both slurp on your noodle soup pretending to be apprentice and idol.
It’s… bizarre. And hot. And bizarre. And frustrating.
You both don’t know where to take all of this. You end up making it a rock-solid daily routine, but not going any further than that because you are afraid. The excuse: Never change a running system.
In the meantime, Baekhyun works out even more. Not to compensate for the calories or to get rid of the increasingly chubby cheeks. Nope, it’s to impress you and show his fitness, plain and simple. At times, the music once again blasts in the practice room after everyone left. You come in to clear the room with Baekhyun in one of his very tight tank tops. 
You greet each other softly smiling. The familiarity really does begin to show. While you sort and organize, he writes you a little note on what to get for food tonight. He scribbles a little „:3“ emoji underneath. 
You think about that for at least two hours before you drive to his apartment.
So, yeah. Something is going on with him regardless of both of you trying to keep your routine stable and CIA-level secret. 
He finds himself cringeworthy when he carries seven stacked up chairs to a group meeting at once just because you’re attending. But something in him can’t help it, for the love of God. At least in this regard, he thinks, something is running on autopilot in terms of flirting methods. Meaning, he really does hide less and less. 
Meanwhile, Lucas’ eyes are falling out because Baekhyun is mustering new levels of strength nobody suspected he had. In the most random situations, even. Baekhyun’s fitness trainer is also living one hell of a life because his protégée is so eager these days. Mastering everything from weights to pilates. Hormones are one hell of a drug.
Kai frequently remarks that Baekhyun is different. „He’s nagging much less, what’s going on, why, why!“ he says to Taemin on the regular, and they invent all kinds of theories.
Since Baekhyun doesn’t want to miss out on your daily evening visit nor spend 8 hours in the gym, that means: He increases the intensity of the work-outs. For two and a half weeks, he is completely knocked out afterwards.
And so… it happens.
Baekhyun falls asleep before your visit. The door he has opened beforehand as always, but you enter a dim room with dozing Baekhyun splayed on the bed in his red carpet outfit from earlier that day. He worked out in the morning, did some hosting, talked his soul out in an interview, attended an award show, drove home, and eventually collapsed in the sheets. Lights out.
You put the rice box and cake slice you brought along on his desk. He looks so cute when he dozes, but you also hate disturbing his sleepy angel hours. Especially because you know how worn-out his schedule has left him and you feel sorry for it. 
You feel weird for standing there with your take-out and want to hurry outside as fast as possible, but leave a note. 
For the first time in weeks, you eat dinner in your own flat.
After forcefully waking up at 3AM due to his usual sleep cycle being off balance, Baekhyun falls into a spiral of regrets. Once it dawns on him what time it is and he must have missed your visit, he buries his face in his palms sitting at the edge of the bed. 
He resents himself for neither cleaning up his bedroom properly nor staying awake even more so, no matter how eventful his day was. He imagines how you must have seen him sleep, probably in the most humiliating, unflattering position and with terrible hair, judging him for being rude, forgetful, unattractive, messy, and probably a thousand other things.
Until… he finds the note. That one gives him a second almost-heart attack, but an adrenaline-fueled one this time. He stumbles back onto his bed and reads it twenty times over.
„Rest well and dig in. Don’t worry. Text if you’re okay. 03304 68010113.“
After three typos in your number, almost choking on cold rice because he eats so passionately, and several minutes of going back and forth on sending something, he kicks his own ass and writes a little „I’m ok, I’m very very sorry! I’m an idiot 😭“. After you reply that he has no reason to apologize, he rambles on about how he wishes that he’s not being an inconvenience to you with a whole row of sad and dejected emojis. 
You hate that Baekhyun feels put on the spot and obliged because of you this way and try to think hard about how to solve the dilemma. You won’t try to stop the rain of his apologies by telling him to calm down because you know it’ll make it worse, and instead decide it’s time to get going.
The opportunity is now, and there’s only one.
‚So, I have an idea—“
Going to the groovy little underground pizza restaurant downtown is something that Baekhyun immediately accepts as a suggestion. He wants to compensate for his dozing, but he also knows that this is a whopping chance more than anything.
And… a covert first date. 
He knows that’s what it is. It’s about leveling up now.
Before you can write that you’ll treat him and he can relax, he gets firm with insisting that you will pay not a single dime. You know that it’s not just his overworking conscience speaking. It’s also the only way Baekhyun gets an occasion to express that he takes this very seriously via text. 
That he wants to repay you and aims to get the most out of meeting up is something you realize when he steps out of the wardrobe room the next evening after everyone in the company has gone home. 
The stylists he has told that he needs to try this particular outfit on for some time to get used to it. „I need to dance in this, so.“
Actually, it is meant for EXO performing at the Oscars next week, but he got away with the excuse and a promise to take care. 
And… he really did the rest of the styling all by himself. He’s turned into a glamorous neat freak. Every shiny hair glued into its desired place, freshly dyed honey blonde with soft brunette roots. 
In fact, who walks at you is a wholly different Baekhyun in a dark, reddish-violet satin suit, pointy black shoes, matte black tie, mature sultry eye shadow, black square sunglasses pushed up into his hair, his signature lipstick, with a distinct statement tote bag, and black lace socks. I repeat: Lace. This is the fanciest anybody has ever headed to eat $6.50 pizza at a tube station. I mean wow, just wow. The tailored shoulders and how tight the tux cinches in at the waist is on par with Kai’s Obsession crop top. 
Even the much more expensive award show outfit from last week looks like a potato sack compared to how much he dolled himself up and reinvented literally every inch about himself. Like you have to prevent yourself from drooling.
Yep. He. Means. Business.
Funnily enough, Baekhyun realizes his zeal and just how much he is trying to impress you at all costs when you turn up with your standard khaki trench coat, bunny print umbrella, and casual white sneakers that have seen World War 1 and 2. You know, just the way you always come to his apartment and the way it’s inconspicuous. 
Going by his face… he starts to overthink his esteem. You can see how his expression becomes mortified. You promptly decide to put an end to his self-conscious back and forth through taking him by the hand. 
„You’re the best-looking man in the world and I’m asking you for a date. Are you comin’ or are you not?“
You then make it particularly clear to him that if anything, this right in front of you is very much authentic Baekhyun and not someone else you’re in for after all. And, that you’re both in your genuine form tonight the way it’s gotta be, the way you know each other and the reason why you decided to do this. Boom.
Four-step Greek style sermon for tonight: Delivered.
Now he’s gaping at you too much to beat himself up. That mission is very much accomplished. Modern problems apparently require ancient rhetoric. You’re in a kick-ass mood tonight. I dunno, anybody would be, Baekhyun’s accentuated sense of style has the historic potential to make girls reckless.
Baekhyun’s hand is heated like an Icelandic geyser and his heartbeat rate would make the average rabbit look like an amateur. Believe it or not — it’s the first time you’re deliberately touching. It’s ridiculous.
You head to the company garage, he churns out five jokes in a row on how he must look like a Korean Elton John on the way to his best-of concert, you laugh… Baekhyun feels better. Three times as nervous compared to when you usually come to his flat, but better nevertheless. And he drives, so. 
He feels like he’s catching up and giving something back, no matter that you feel he doesn’t have to, but to him, it’s important. 
You joke back to him how it’s a little bit funny — Elton John pun intended — that you saw every inch of Baekhyun’s apartment at this point already but this is the first date. The world is upside down, but it’s SM Entertainment, so. Things get started in different ways, but they do.
That realization is getting to him, too. Baekhyun’s peacock alter ego emerges to bolt over the motorway like a lovedrunk Lewis Hamilton with a foot glued to the gas pedal, but also checks fifty times for how you feel in the passenger seat. Asking about how you like it, if the A/C is set to how you want it, whether your seat is tilted the way you enjoy it. Damn, he really is on edge. 
On top of that, said alter ego maneuvers him right into a 3-kilometer outer ring traffic jam before his innocent self even realizes it. More time to chat… more time to sit so close… more time you get to savor the comfort of his luxurious car. So that was a Freudian slip with a steering wheel right there.
You already know that Baekhyun has never tried as hard to make somebody like him. You compliment his taste in cars vice versa to take that pressure off before he turns into a nervous wreck entirely. And then, also adding that you could get used to this which makes Baekhyun feel like a billion Won. His eyes are downcast, his cheeks are beaming. Figures, light superpowers and such, we know the deal.
Meanwhile, that you really like him already and for a long time is something you challenge yourself to make more than apparent to him. If he’s still this desperate about pleasing you and unsure about how he comes across, there’s some work to do. This guy needs a sign. A football field-sized one. If Baekhyun’s demon is his self-worth tonight, yours is being a lot more demonstrative. You’ve been far too indirect with him all day every day.
That you’re outside of both your professional spheres actually helps: Big fucking time.
Easing him into a conversation happens surprisingly smooth when you recount visiting his apartment and seeing him sleep so beautifully. Which you say was the most gratifying thing which is the truth. It’s been on his mind, hearing about your relief makes a lot of things plague him less. 
You also add how you enjoy bringing him food just because. That he’s nice and good company, even when he sleeps. That assures Baekhyun and makes him laugh.
And yes. He ends up serenading you throughout the entire traffic jam. And yes. When Baekhyun is in love, his singing is particularly on point. You can hear the cherry on top in his registers. No need for the stereo, you can ask him to sing any song you like. 
The traffic jam disperses after 20 minutes, Baekhyun has interpreted your entire favorite playlist at this point. Arriving feels like way too soon. 
You put your trench coat over Baekhyun while he exits the car. There’s hardly anyone around in this part of the town but who knows, making sure not to mess up his hair in the process. Both of you hurry to the stairs leading underground. Meanwhile, the car is parked quite stealthily behind a closed-down fish restaurant with dusty windows.
It feels good to walk around with Baekhyun right by your side. 
The surroundings are cluttered with trash and only few people wait at the tube station that opens up before you with every step downwards. It’s actually perfect as a getaway. There are mostly older businessmen on shift at first glance. 
It’s colder out in the open and surrounded by surfaces of concrete, the car was like a spa by comparison. Baekhyun takes the initiative to put the trench coat back onto your shoulders. You feel flattered and you smile at each other, and walk on with synchronized steps. The pizza bar is almost within sight. In the meantime, the digital board announces the tube arriving in five minutes. He takes your hand.
And then… some real bullshit goes down.
A group of seven scraggly-looking teens lounge on a bench, roughly 200 meters before the pizza bistro. You have to pass the bench close-by given how narrow the walking space next to the train tracks is. 
One of them, the tallest of the bunch, coarsely shouts at you. „How much did that prostitute cost and where does he keep his money, huh?“ He sticks his wriggling tongue out right along. The others are ogling Baekhyun’s shoes and chest pockets, preying and laughing and sneering. It dawns on you that you should’ve asked for one more song in the car.
The mood tips. One of the boys sitting on the left side of the bench starts fiddling with a 3-inch switchblade. And then, something flicks the switch inside you, too. Your Kyoong-protect-o-meter goes through the roof faster than Baekhyun can get his car to the speed limit. 
Cue She-Hulk transformation. In an onslaught of your inner wrestling diva claiming her rights, you take matters into your own hands by hurling Baekhyun’s glitzy designer bag at the guy’s surprised face. Sorry Versace, it had to be done. The whole group gasps out loud. While they’re still caught off guard, you go on to lunge forward and furiously whack greasy knife guy and two other approaching attackers with your Roger fucking Rabbit umbrella using a windmill-motion martial arts technique you came up with from scratch. Baekhyun doesn’t even have to duck… being smol has its advantages. 
The switchblade is sent flying into a bin. Point landing. You proceed to rip into the group to helicopter your improvised weapon in circles until it threatens to plow down the better of them and they back away squealing and pleading. Britney would be so damn proud of you, I’m telling ya.
Needless to say, the mortally terrified group runs and disperses into the arriving tube, probably booking their therapist appointments for Monday morning already. You pick up the bag for Baekhyun a little breathless, dust it off, and say a prayer. Holy shit. 
What the hell just happened. Literally, what the fucking fuck.
An entirely wide-eyed Baekhyun still can’t believe that a whole group of sleazy guys twice as tall as him took an unhinged windmill beating by you to prevent a robbery, and meanwhile he is the martial arts champion. Like, hello? He’s been a Hapkido instructor with several gold medals. How many black belts does the guy have again? He could mow down fifty of that kind and pulverize anyone of them with a mere NCT-style kick. This is ridiculous. He’s mighty impressed.
A few businessmen at the station are looking at you from afar with open mouths. You wave and give a thumbs up signalling all is okay. The security personnel reviewing the CCTV the next day is down for a ride. You hope that there are no headlines with pictures of this. Tube brats get their ass busted by cartoon bunny at 2:15 AM. K-Pop star Baekhyun defended by mysterious umbrella wielder gone wild.
You take a deep breath, brush off your coat. „Um. Moving on I guess.“ Then, interlink arms with Baekhyun, strolling on toward the restaurant. Looking around everywhere, still a little shocked. Walking off your relief helps, as is looking forward to eating. Damn, you do outrageous things when you’re hungry.
The restaurant is the size of the practice room at best, lit with white neon and decorated with Italian flags in every corner. The empty seats are designed like in an American diner from the 80s.
The lanky six-foot-something waiter, Luigi Roberto Maranello Salvatore (his nameplate is really in-depth about this), hurries to the door when he sees how Baekhyun is dressed and probably thinks the King of Korea just arrived. Which he, in fact, did, but that’s beside the point. 
You sit at the very back and get comfortable after breaking your last sweat. An enthusiastic Luigi presents to you the latest ‚delicious couple menu options’ and promises to use the best toppings he can offer. You instantly trust him, Luigi has the most accurate mustache you’ve ever seen.
Baekhyun and you share a huge plate of the curiously named ‚Pizza Puppy Love‘  that might be better described as a circle-shaped late night gala buffet. You dig in because damn, fighting thugs makes hungry, and Baekhyun stuffs himself given how it’s his favorite meal. Luigi sees that you are avid eaters and way too busy looking at each other, so he disappears in the kitchen, proud of setting the mood just perfectly.
In the meantime, Baekhyun says that he thinks of hiring you as a sasaeng protection machine. You muse how the umbrella is sturdier than you thought and you wouldn’t hesitate to use it again now that you think about it. Being Baekhyun’s Jarvis is not a bad thought, actually. Beating up rascals for him is your newly discovered love language.
In fact: Whatever took over inside of you and made you lose your chill, Baekhyun is mighty curious about. He thinks that was very sexy. You get the feeling that this guy could like dangerous women. He might have picked that up from Taemin, credits to him.
After Baekhyun has dramatically recounted the umbrella incident at least five times, the conversation goes on about your embarrassing hiding stories, how hilariously over- and underdressed you are as a unit, and you teasing him about „speeding on the highway, are we“. Baekhyun teases you back about how you acted like his manager with your trench coat over his head. He kind of has a point and you call it a tie.
Seeing Baekhyun all full with his beloved pizza and acting so carefree in his Oscar suit is a cute sight. You take the liberty to cut a particularly large slice out of the puppy pizza UFO and feed him. 
If it’s a couple menu, you gotta act like it.
Baekhyun is making some mighty heart eyes at you, and so — you decide to take it a little further. This whole fight thing made you forget you’re on a goddamn date after… a whole year of eyefucking and that it’s about time to close the gap.
Luigi is wholly busy making order in the kitchen and Baekhyun has some tomato sauce stuck at the side of his mouth. Convenient. You take the chance to wipe it off with the tip of your right digit. 
He realizes what you’re doing and promptly grabs your hand to keep it right where it is. Uh-oh. His tongue darts out, he licks right across your finger. To top it off, he starts to suck it, too. With a typical nonchalance. Seeing how you almost combust, he takes another finger into his hot mouth. And sucks a little more. His lipstick smudges onto your hand. His eyes are like hot coals and the pupils are all blown. Oh my, my, my. 
If you’re just playing, don’t you ever give Baekhyun anything to escalate on like that, ever. The way you were ready to knock down the seven guys, he is ready to get physical once the first step is done. Though, the thing is. You’re not playing. It’s exactly the type of fodder that you’ve been craving to give him. Baekhyun’s oral fixation is something else.
The rest of the pizza is gone in five minutes…
…and Luigi gets the tip of his life.
You walk to the car in much faster steps than before. Even if it’s later than late, nobody is around anymore except a sleeping beggar on the other side of the station. No danger in sight whatsoever. There’s a different reason to get going like that this time and there’s no way you can mentally prepare yourself for what’s coming.
Back to the fish restaurant, back to the car spa. Nobody on the streets, anywhere. This night, Baekhyun does not feel even remotely tired, though.
After you put your umbrella in the trunk — you will honor it much more from now on — the driver’s and passenger’s seat stay empty for half an hour and a little more. Now, the actual stereo is on. There’s a lot to catch up with on the backseat.
Baekhyun puts Delight on repeat, and queues City Lights just because. Guy knows what good music and singing sounds like. You interlock hands and call him pretty. Baekhyun is flustered, but all the more eager. 
It takes barely a minute until you get serious with making out on top of him and grind on his lap like the world ends. The satiny fabric is too tempting not to gyrate all over it in your jeans. Lord knows his legs are great. You know what you signed up for. Those thighs are so delicious to straddle, you can’t even imagine. 
Baekhyun gazes at you so intently and ready, whispering his little you-can-do-anythings and tell-me-all-you-wants, it’s like magic.
To top it off, kissing his little pouty lips has got to be the best thing, running your hands through his sexy hair — even more so. Your mouth and fingers have been begging you to do this. Begging. 
From there, your hands go places. His neatly razored nape of the neck, his waist, the chest. His suit, all that expensive fabric, his gentle skin, it’s so nice to the touch. He smells so hot. Bergamot, cinnamon, and sweet, deep, rich and soothing sandalwood. „Girl, I’m your Candy“ gets a whole new meaning. Practice room memories. As if you aren’t wet enough already. 
By the last minute of the second track, Baekhyun is already hooked kissing your neck and does some very daring acrobatics with his tongue. And you thought the pizza would satiate him. Nope, he eats you up like a whole salad bowl of black bean noodles with three pounds kimchi and ten fried eggs stacked on top. In his own words I mean lyrics: Game over.
The desperation and nervosity adds even more sloppiness and hunger. These have got to be the lewdest slurping and sucking noises you’ve ever heard. You can’t help but curse the ugliest things. Something’s pretty damn hard through the front of his tux already. 
Baekhyun feels that you feel it and the kissing becomes even more frantic. His whole body says: Grind more. Please. Please.
By the time the fourth track starts, Baekhyun’s entirely wet mouth wanders upward. Here goes the French kissing madness. You glide your hips back and forth on his bulge, and his tongue is already winding inside of you like it’s advanced singing lessons. It’s so unreal that you have to grab hold of his upper arms to stay in place. Shit, this guy. 
You can tell that this… is his absolute forte. Nobody can fuck with Baekhyun when it comes to outrageous mouth and throat technique. Your tongue gets a sense of how confident he is in his lip service and works his way into it. Now you know how it feels when Byun Baekhyun pays back your attention. Holy Luigi’s Cannoli, he has so much fun. Way, way too much fun. Like Sir, this is a Wendy’s.
And that’s the last damn straw. Really, the last one. You can’t do this shit anymore. You ask for condoms. 
After freezing up for at least ten seconds, he nods his little head about ten times in a row. It’s as if he can’t actually believe it and didn’t just kiss the shit out of you with the hardest dick in history.
„Okay, I’ll—“
Baekhyun keeps them in a yellow puppy-shaped bag under the driver’s seat and takes three torturous minutes to get them from there since it’s underneath and behind other random things. Which means you get to look at his ass for said time because he is bent forward between the two front seats. It’s not like you’ve never seen Baekhyun from behind, but never this close nor in a suit as tight since he usually wears baggy things. So. He’s not just big in the front, then. For his build? That is Korea’s ass.
And the condoms? You expected they were in his tote or his suit within one reach and rip. Nope, Baekhyun did not leave the company building with intentions. He’s been managing this raging boner for a whole year and did not make any moves on you in his apartment where he could have had you on any available surface in two minutes. Baekhyun wasn’t close to even remotely ask for literally anything. He just sat there on the couch with restless legs, ruffled hair, and an open mouth while hearing you talk. You don’t want to imagine how intensely he must have gotten off. Which he, in fact, did. 
He didn’t deliberately plan sex in a specific place for the first date either. Instead, he was prepared for— what exactly? A slight eventuality? Now that you think about it: Going by how he dressed himself, what Baekhyun probably thought he could get out of this was: A compliment. Even if all of your evening visits were nothing but hardcore sexual tension and this was the chance to bring that to an end. Let that sink in.
This guy’s self-control is not only astronomical, but also completely astounding given his usual character. In fact, you thought he would be entirely sovereign with this. How could he not? He’s Baekhyun!
Going by all that… You conclude that Baekhyun must really feel like he does not deserve you. His shame and self-denial must go through the roof. Given how his deeper insecurities have been in plain sight, it actually makes sense. Looks like you’re the one bringing them out, whatever it is that you do. It’s pretty tough knowing that you rouse something as vulnerable in him but it’s as good as it is bad. You find him very brave and incredible for letting it show. Honestly? It’s better than pushing through all of this pretending.
Plus — You really must have given him the impression that he can look but not ever touch. While that’s the entire opposite of what you want. 
To be fair: Having Baekhyun openly touch you in the company would have been a dangerous act. Even more so than say, you touching him, (which would have been somewhat possible, look at stylists and managers casually or work-relatedly doing skinship). Because that means that the availability his profession suggests to the world is no longer a thing and his mind is set on one person. Which, in his field, is social death. 
That’s why Baekhyun could only ever touch you by virtue of circumstances and whatever higher forces arranging accidents where he bumped into you. Talk about indirect ways. The universe gave you what you wanted, but in a way where there was always the excuse of bad luck and no possibility of other people finding out about your feelings. Risky love breeds risky circumstances.
The same with showing his body or knocking at your door to get your attention. He knows he can’t do that, can’t ask for it. So what happens? You accidentally walk in on him, or he crashes against your office entrance after slipping.
The same with treating you, spending time together, getting taken care of by you. Baekhyun found himself wishing for it. So it happened that you spilled your fries and he bought them for you all over, and he was begging for fried noodles so the opportunity to meet surprisingly came about. The accidents themselves both of you didn’t want nor deliberately stage, but you very much wanted the results of them. Directly you could not express your feelings, not even Baekhyun. That’s how it all came to be and now you see just how much he wants to be close to you in so many ways.
That he feels ashamed and undeserving — that shocks the living hell out of you. 
So, all right then, keeper. Time to show you otherwise. 
It’s crazy how he thinks you’re the one off limits and not him. Then again, he’s not the guy with the savage umbrella technique.
Since his hand is too shaky, you slip one on him and start to ride him without any further ado. You’re already leaking so what’s left to fiddle around about. No wasting any time here. 
The deal is as good as sealed. He feels fucking great inside of you and his wide eyes are the most rewarding thing. Whatever dimension Baekhyun just broke through, the level of whipped is not possible to be described with any human words. His hands are roaming over you pretty much without aim, you can tell your body is too much for him.
After he’s begging you to do it roughly, you grab him by the collar and fuck his soul out until he’s all gasping because his dick hurts. The song’s called Are You Ridin’ with good reason.
Baekhyun’s brains are long screwed out at this point, if not reduced to absolute green and purple jello. Is there actually any mind to lose at this point after you had your fingers in his mouth? Like literally, his favorite thing? Probably not. 
He bites down into his sleeve. Baekhyun is all knocked out by you by the time you get to your second orgasm, and reclines on the backseat bench to starfish the rest of the thing with his mouth hanging open at you. Hormone overload. His entire body shut down except the will to keep it up and not come. Yum, he is fit. Where he takes that godly strength from, only higher powers can tell. The Tree of Life, Zeus, Ten Chittaphon, I don’t know. 
He just has the kind of dick you can really bounce on. Really. Fucking. Hard. You are one spark of insanity close to run on autopilot. I don’t think anybody’s growled like this on him before. Nor was Baekhyun’s cock this close to falling right off, ever. 
This is not sex, it’s a crazy as fuck pounding, with Baekhyun on the verge of being blacked out with drool on his chin and his eyes rolling back. His fingers are absentmindedly trailing down your upper back and all he can utter is a small, yearning „please, please“ and gritting „don’t stop, please don’t stop…“ between his teeth. And hell, you have not a single reason to. Cue Captain America, I can do this all day.
When other people say smashing, whatever they’re referring to is not as smash as this. This must be the dirtiest, wettest slapping noise you’ve ever heard, and Baekhyun’s entirely uncontrolled moans will be forever etched into your memory. So melodic, so goddamn excited and desperate and all fucked out. He’s groaning so well, it’s like it’s meant for you.
By the third time you come, he’s crying and whining and has to cover his mouth not to scream out loud. You have no idea what your body is doing, but whatever it is, it’s taking Baekhyun out. Even you tire after some time, but you keep going. You imagine that every thrust is the meal and attention you wanna give to him.
That’s a lot of fucking and edging you get done in half an hour. Baekhyun’s tongue is hanging out afterwards and you went through a whopping three condoms. So much frustration finally released. Baekhyun’s gonna be emptier than Suho’s wallet after Sehun ordered a lifetime supply of bubble tea. 
You squarely avoid oozing your own cum onto his backseat with one hand. Good lord that creampie would ruin everything if he didn’t wear a condom. You’ve come a long way since colliding in the cafeteria, not gonna lie.
And thank God you’re not fucking somewhere in the company and the Audi is close to soundproof because this guy is LOUD. You need some good eardrums to handle these moans. Unhinged is an understatement. If this becomes a contest outwhoring each other, he’d win by a landslide. 
By the time you slip off, Baekhyun is on the verge to the dreamland, you milked every last drop out of him. Which means… 
…you get to drive an expensive as fuck Audi through Seoul. Your beatdown with the tube thugs you try to refrain from boasting about, but this one you are tempted to brag about to yourself for the next week. Well, in your mind. Just a little bit. It’s a great car. And you feel giddy in your body all over. That’s what sex with Baekhyun does to you. 
Seoul traffic is tame around this time. Half in his sleep, Baekhyun hums and sings on the driver’s seat. He’s all sober, but you made the guy act a lil’ drunk, huh. In his element, he talks and talks and talks and talks a little more. Then, does his tiny 'ㅅ' pup face and dozes for half the ride. Sleeping angel hours.
You can’t really scold him for passing out so fast in the slightest. As always, he went who knows how many extra miles just for you. That includes vowing to hand-wash his Oscars suit because it’s fucking ruined. Since the stylists are guaranteed to flame him, you send the fashion department a message how Baekhyun has to wear a different suit because he’s simply too dummy thick for this one, especially as far as the pants are concerned. Which is almost no lie and they will believe you. 
Much like his name suggests, Baekhyun does go hundred. At his apartment, you basically have to carry him into the bedroom. He says he doesn’t want to sleep. But you won’t kiss him goodnight after you pull off your jacket without a strong word on how his health has to be priority. He gets the point when you say you wouldn’t have had a first date without Baekhyun dozing off before your evening visit.
Sweet baby Jesus, you’d still be awkwardly slurping noodles without Baekhyun’s faux pas. If you look back at it: It’s all a story of accidents that turn out beautiful.
Sleep being Baekhyun’s reset button, that’s the best thing to do in order to give the night a good conclusion. Being alone in his apartment together, you don’t have to discreet about sleeping next to him after setting the alarm clock.
Mark Lee’s piping hot Americano is the culprit for all of this, but you thank him.
----
© 2017-2021 submissive-bangtan. all rights reserved. no reposts allowed.
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misscorn · 4 years
Text
Day 2 Clumsy/Date
Here's my second contribution to @takaritsuweek ! I really hope yall are enjoying these, I feel like writing oneshots is kinda hard for me bc I dont want too much or too little to happen
Anyways, high school nostalgia literally gives me life so yes we're still in the past lol
***
Onodera Ritsu was currently trying to ignore how his senpai was staring at him. The brunette had his face in a book, using it as a wall of defense as he tried not to give into the temptation of looking beside him where Saga Masamune sat. However, Ritsu couldn't bear the weight of his senpai's gaze for very long, feeling his cheeks start to heat up with embarrassment. Was his hair sticking up in a weird way? Or was he having some kind of wardrobe malfunction? Or was there something on his face? It was practically killing the first year at this point, so finally he turned ever so slightly to face Saga just a tad more, not being bold or brave enough to face him straight on.
"Um, S-Saga-senpai, w-why are you s-staring at me?" Ritsu managed to get out, not meeting Saga's eyes.
"Ah, sorry, I didn't mean to. I was just thinking." Saga said vaguely, averting his gaze since it seemed to be making his kohai uncomfortable.
"Thinking about what? I-If you don't mind me asking!" Ritsu hoped he wouldn't come off as prying or nosy. If his senpai didn't want to share then that was okay!
"Just that we should go on another date sometime soon." Saga said calmly, knowing perfectly well what kind of reaction his words would elicit.
As if on que, Ritsu went red to his ears and had to stop himself from shouting 'a date?!' not wanting to bring any more attention to the two of them than necessary. However, one particular word caught his ear.
"Another?" Ritsu parroted, blinking at Saga blankly, seeming to have no recollection of a first date ever happening which made Saga frowned.
"Yes, another." Saga said. "Remember, we got lunch together? You freaked out when trying to order because of all the options." He reminded him, trying not to smirk. It was a little funny, after all, the way Ritsu got so flustered, but also kind of cute and endearing.
Did Ritsu really not remember their first date? Saga knew the brunette could be a little bit scatterbrained sometimes, but the thought of him forgetting their first date kind of...hurt. Not that Saga would ever admit that.
However, Saga's fears were laid to rest as Ritsu's eyes lit up with realization. "Yes! Yes, I remember, but I just...I d-didn't realize th-that was a...d-d-date." He admitted, struggling to even get the word out.
"What? Did you not have fun or something?" Saga asked, frowning again.
"N-no, no, that's not it!" Ritsu assured. Although it had been difficult for him to order, the food was good and he had enjoyed spending time with his senpai, like he always did. He looked down nervously before he spoke again to explain himself. "I-I guess I just didn't want to assume that senpai would want to g-go on a d-date with m-me." Ritsu said quietly. Somehow, he was even embarrassed by that confession. He felt like everything he said and did was wrong and annoying and stupid and-
BONK
Ritsu sat there stunned for a moment before realizing Saga had gently brought his fist down on to the top of his head. "Idiot. Of course I want to go on a date with you. We are dating after all." Saga said. "It's settled then. We're going on another date. Are you free on Sunday?"
"E-Eh?! W-wait-s-senpai-I don't-"
"Do you not wanna go on a date?" Saga asked, trying not to hint at his disappointment.
"N-no! I m-mean yes! I mean-" Ritsu paused and took a breath. "I mean I'd very much like to go on a d-date." He said, face completely red. "A-and yes, I'm free on Sunday." He added.
"Good. Want to get lunch again? We can go someplace else this time if you want." Saga said.
"N-no, I'm okay with going to the same spot. I don't get to eat a lot of fast food, so..." He trailed off, giving a sheepish laugh. "I'll just have to figure out my order before hand so I don't get overwhelmed." He added, looking determined now.
Saga had to stop himself from chuckling, not wanting to accidentally discourage the brunette, he was just so damn cute.
"I'll meet you there at noon then?" Saga said, his voice giving way to his excitement just a little bit, but Ritsu either didn't notice or thought nothing of it.
"Yeah! A-and maybe afterward w-we can go to the bookstore?" Ritsu suggested hesitantly.
As if Saga would say no.
"Sure." He said.
Ritsu smiled brightly, satisified with their plan and now looking greatly forward to the upcoming weekend.
---------------------------------------------------
Saga had been looking forward to this weekend too. Until he was standing alone, an hour after noon. He frowned to himself, considering going inside and getting something to go before heading home, but he continued to hold out hope that Ritsu would miraculously show up.
Ritsu wouldn't stand him up, right? Ritsu wouldn't forget about their date, would he? Maybe something popped up, some kind of emergency. Or worse, maybe Ritsu got hurt somehow. It didn't help that the underclassman didn't have a freaking cellphone! Seriously, this was the twenty-first century and if something had happened then Ritsu could have easily texted or called instead of leaving him out to dry like this. Ritsu better have a good excuse come tomorrow afternoon as to why he bailed.
Saga sighed, feeling defeated as he was about to forget the food all together and head home to sulk in his room when he heard a familiar voice call out.
"S-Senpai!"
Saga turned to see Ritsu waving and running toward him. Never had Saga been so happy to see the awkward teen. However, his relief was short-lived as a splitsecond later the brunette fell on his face.
"Oi, Ritsu! Are you alright?" Saga asked, quickly at his side and helping him up.
"Ooow." Ritsu complained as he stood from the sidewalk. "I'm fine, I'm fine, I fall like that all the time." He admitted. "I'm clumsy like that." He said, his embarrassment starting to catch up with him as he blushed darkly. "A-anyways, I'm so, so sorry for being late senpai!" Ritsu apologized quickly, a frown on his face. "I told my mother I was leaving to meet a friend and she wouldn't let me go. She just kept hounding me about details and she kept trying to keep me there by guilt tripping me about not spending time with family." He sighed. "I'm really, really sorry for making you wait, senpai. Kind of a lousy start to a date, huh?" Ritsu said, trying to joke around to lighten the mood, but he just felt like crying.
Saga wanted to tell him that all was forgiven, that he would wait for Ritsu endlessly, that he had been so happy to see him running down the street, that he was relieved that he wasn't the only one who cared about this date and wanted it to go well, and most of all he wanted to tell him that he loved him. Instead, he just ruffled Ritsu's hair. "It's okay." He assured. "We still have all afternoon. There's no rush."
Ritsu smiled up at him, his worries allevated at his senpai's words. Although Saga was quiet, sometimes even distant, he always proved again and again what Ritsu had originally thought: his senpai was so kind.
"Come on, I'm starving." Saga said, leading him inside. "Tell me what you want, I'll order for you if you wanna get us a table." He said.
Ritsu, although wanting to prove he could order, was very grateful for the offer. He recited to his senpai the order he had memorized before coming here and then left his side to go sit.
Saga waited behind a couple people, glancing at Ritsu ever so often and smiling to himself.
This would be a good second date.
He would make sure of it so Ritsu would want a third.
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tinywooniverse · 5 years
Text
Monsta X reaction to their crush saying “i wish i could feel loved for once when i’m in a relationship”
requested: yes!!
a/n: these are gonna be in all lowercase bc like,,, i’m lazy and i don’t like to change my settings anymore. (gifs are not mine)
———————————
here you are, standing at his door with tears cascading down your face. he opens the door, rubbing his eyes signaling that he had been about to fall asleep. however seeing you in your state of grief had immediately woke him up.
“oh were you sleeping. i’m sorry i’ll just go-” you say through sniffles and short breaths.
“no don’t go,” he says quickly but then gains his composure, “just- just come in you can sleep here tonight it’s late and you don’t look like you’re fine.”
“no seriously i don’t wanna-”
“you came here for a reason right?”
“yes.”
“then come in,” he says, coaxing you into the house. it felt like the walk of shame for you. running to him every time you felt like this was stupid and you knew you shouldn’t do it but you couldn’t help it.
you both silently settle in the living room, making yourselves comfortable before you calmly speak.
“i broke up with him.”
“what? why?” he speaks, trying his best to sound surprised. this was his crush after all. watching you be in relationships with anyone that wasn’t him was a bummer and so the fact that you were now single was good for him.
“because he bailed again. he’s been ditching me for a month. it’s like we weren’t even in a relationship. do you understand that? am i just being stupid?”
“no i understand and it’s not stupid it’s very valid.” he says moving a bit closer to her.
“i just-”
“you just what?”
“i just wish i could feel loved for once when i’m in a relationship.”
shownu:
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“i can assure you that you will be. you just have you find the right person,” he says pulling you in for a hug. he felt you cling to him as if your life depended on it.
“what about you,” you ask as you release you hold on him. he cocks his head to the side hoping you’re meaning what he thinks you mean. a simple “huh” is all he could manage, “would you love me if we were in a relationship?”
“would i love you?”
“yes, would you love me?”
“i would love you to the end of the earth. i would love you to the moon and back five billion times and maybe make a trip to the sun even though that would be certain death but that’s what love makes you do. i would love you like tomorrow was nonexistent. i would love you more than my heart would allow. i already-” he rambles stopping himself before he embarrasses himself even more. his cheeks turn a light shade of pink and turn forward so that you could see his face.
“you already what?”
he continued to face forward not speaking a word. you just lean over and lay your head on his shoulder
“it’s okay you don’t have to say anything. i heard everything i needed to hear.”
wonho:
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“you deserve so much better than him and everyone that knows you knows that. if he doesn’t make you feel loved i can promise you that someone else will.”
“are you sure about that? i mean every single relationship so far has just showed me the exact opposite,” you say sighing heavily.
“i don’t think you understand. there are so many people who love you unconditionally and even more so. those guys you’ve been dating were shitty anyways.”
“oh please, who would love me. i’m a mess.”
“me silly.” he says smiling. he was bold about this with the intent of both not hiding his feeling until the next guy came and stole your heart and also getting his point across.
you look at him with your eyes glazed over and hug him. he kisses the top of your head as you cry yet again.
“thank you.”
minhyuck:
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“fuck him you got me,” he says half joking, half telling the truth.
“minhyuck seriously,” you ask kind of offended that he made this a time to joke. of course you knew minhyuck was only trying to lighten the mood but right now you needed him to be serious. he was the one you came to during this hard time after all, “i’m just gonna go.” you go to get up and minhyuck pulls you back, holding you.
“i know i joke around a lot but i was being somewhat serious you know.”
“what do you mean?” you say pulling back.
“well i didn’t wanna confess this way because you’re not fully yourself and your judgement could be impaired but i mean-”
“i’m sad about a break up, not drunk. get to the point.”
“i like you and i think you deserve the best boyfriend in the world and like,,, i’m not that but i’m willing to wait until you realize that i’m better than all the assholes you’ve dated,” he said all in one breath.
“i see.”
kihyun:
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he would start setting his own room up for you to sleep in. it was in his nature to coddle people but for you it was totally different because you know,,, he liked you and only wanted to make you happy so the extra coddling was needed. he had sent you off with some of his clothes so that you weren’t sleeping uncomfortably and had waited for you. you waddle in and climb into the bed as he tucks you in, kissing you on the forehead.
“remember, if you don’t feel like anyone loves you just know that i do,” he says and you nod your head snuggling deeper in the comforter. he walks to the door and turns the light out.
“kihyun,” you say quickly. he looks back, his soft eyes meeting your silhouette, “stay here.”
he’s in no place to say no. he’s tired and the couch will hurt his back. he walks back and climbs into bed with you. a beat of silence passes before you turn over.
“i love you too.”
hyungwon:
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he blankly stares at you.
“tons of people love you y/n,” he says, putting a hand on your shoulder, “it’s ridiculous to even say that.”
“in a relationship hyungwon. did you not get it when i said it? i want to feel loved in a relationship. like i want a boyfriend that’s not gonna treat me like shit.”
“you could always have that you know?”
“oh yeah, with who?” you ask looking skeptically at him. he goes to open his mouth and say something but instead picks up his tea and takes a long sip. you look shocked, hyungwon was usually up front with you about a lot of things and he’s never gone as far as doing that dumb shit. he does it to everyone when has something to say but wants to avoid it before shit hits the fan. this was his first time actually going there with you.
“hyungwonnie,” you say as he sets his cup down. you slide it more towards you so that you could stop him if he tried again, “is there something you’re not telling me.”
“yes but right now is not the right time so if you don’t mind i’ll just get going to bed now.”
“okay well then i’m coming with you,” you say crossing your arms.
“oh you want the bed? i’ll take the couch then.”
“no i want you,” you say immediately realizing that you definitely may have outed yourself, “AND i won’t leave you alone until you tell me what you want to tell me.”
“okay well if that’s the case then it’s me. i like you. i’m caught. now i’m gonna go to-”
“well it looks like i’m going with you after all.”
he just looks stunned.
jooheon:
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after your teary confession, you and jooheon go up to him room to cuddle. it was a common occurrence between the two of you. when he was sad, cuddles. when you were sad, cuddles. you two just resort to cuddling every time you’re together honestly. it was completely silent now. you’re just laying in his bed. only soft breathing could be heard.
“you know i love you right,” jooheon says, breaking the silence. you giggle and nod your head, snuggling closer to him, “even though i really don’t want to.”
“jooheon?” you say untangling yourself from him, sitting up with a hurt look on your face. of course you were probably just being sensitive but this felt like an attack, like he was kicking you while you were down.
“i don’t think you get how much hurt i would save myself if i didn’t feel this way about you. i’m the one you come to after a shitty little boy does this to you. i’m the one you end up cuddling. why am i always the example huh? why is it always “i wish all guys were like you honey” and not “i want you jooheon”? it’s so hard loving you the way i do and you know that,” he rants avoiding eye contact. you look shocked. you didn’t know that he felt like this. jooheon was a fine young man who had his choice and you for sure thought he had pushed you to the furthest corner of the friend zone.
“i didn’t kno-”
“you didn’t know what y/n? you didn’t know that i love you more than every word in every sentence in every book on every shelf in every bookstore and library in the world? or that i love you more then every word sang in every chorus, verse, bridge and hell even every back up vocal track in every love song ever written? or that i love you more than every sparkle in your eye that shows when the right amount of light catches your eye which is all the damn time by the way? or that i ask myself if i could love you more than i do today and the answer is always no but what happens, the next day rolls around and i love you far more than i did the day before? i love you so much and you have proven time and time again that you don’t love me back but guess what my dumbass can’t do? unlove you. and that shit hurts a lot.” he say with tears stinging his eyes. he didn’t wanna cry in front of you so he just got up and walked towards the door.
“honey you just said you loved me and now you’re leaving. why?”
he sighs and walks back, sitting at the edge of the bed putting his hands d over his face. you wrap your arms and legs around his torso.
“i’m sorry. i didn’t know. but i assure you the feelings are mutual.”
changkyun:
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he would let you cry your sadness off, offering physical comfort in the form of hugs and cuddles and babying you. he wasn’t really sure of what else to do other than that and once he found the right words to say he looked over and saw you sleeping. he carried you to his room and tucked you in, grabbing his notebook and a pen before quietly exiting the room. he sits on the couch and writes until his head spins before falling alseep.
the next morning you wake up. by yourself. in changkyun‘s room. i look around as if you woke up in a different dimension before getting up and tiptoeing downstairs. you hear changkyun in the kitchen and sit on the couch going to grab the remote when your eye catches his notebook. you’re never one to invade his privacy and blah blah blah but this page had your name written all over it. you were curious. and when you’re curious nothing stops you. you pick up the book and begin to read.
‘y/n i love you so damn much it’s pathetic’
‘...i love you so much i wanna freaking do a head dive off those freaking steps. it would hurt much less than this feeling...’
‘...i love you so much if you told me you wanted to be a fairy princess i would sure enough sit in a field of stuffy ass flowers and make you stupid flower crowns to match every outfit you own...’
‘... this is annoying as hell but i imagine waking up one day in the future to you blasting your favorite songs and getting ready for the day..’
‘... also annoying but i’ve already imagined how i would proposed...’
‘... imagine being married to the absolute love of your life...’
when you finish you’re blushing. you set the notebook down and quickly turn on the television as you hear changkyun’s footsteps coming toward you. he walks in with breakfast and is shocked to see you up. he hands you a plate and sits down next to you and from the corner of your eye you see him eyeing the open notebook
“flower crowns huh?”
he just looks wide eyed and flustered.
“maybe right now is a good time to take myself up on that head diving off the stairs thing,” he says.
(i hope i did well. i know some of the them a lot shorter than i expected. and i also took long i’m so sorry)
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smolspiderboy · 6 years
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Love & Baseball ~ Scott Reed
Request: Hi can i request a scott reed imagine where the reader doesnt go to liberty high (she does online/homeschool) but they meet through a summer job and start dating, but when school starts back up he never wants her to come to games or parties or anything and one day she surprises him at one of his games and he gets really mad and doesn’t want to introduce her to his friends and she thinks its bc hes embarrassed by her or cheating or something worse but it turns out he just doesn’t want her to know that he’s friends with such awful people and likes that their relationship is private and he can get away from it all when hes with her
Pairing: Scott Reed x Reader
A/N: @sunshinegally requested this and i’m so happy they did! I love them and they are absolutely amazing (: This was honestly so much fun to write and I’m super sorry it took me so long to post it. I really hope you like it even though it kinda sucks. Also I’ve been super busy with school and family this summer. But i’m back and better than ever so go ahead and request imagines and ships now!
Warnings: Cursing and mentions of Bryce Walker (ew)
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You never would’ve imagined that working at the local Dairy Queen for the summer would be the best decision of your life. Usually teenagers dreaded going back to work during the summer and originally this was the case for you. At least until you met him. Scott Reed, the most wonderful, fun-loving, and caring guy in this small town. This boy meant everything to you and this was the best summer of your entire life. But of course, summer always comes to an end.
“Scottie, I can’t believe how lucky I am to call you mine.” You smile at him leaning into his open arms. This was the usual date night for you and Scott, laying in bed watching movies together. It may seem simple and lame to others but the both of you loved the idea of being close to one another and not having to do fancy/expensive things to make each other happy.
“Babe, if anything I’m the lucky one. I mean have you seen yourself? You’re basically a Goddess.” Scott remarks, true infatuation evident in his eyes. “Spending time with you is my favorite activity.” He places a kiss onto your temple.
“I love spending time with you too. I’m so sad that school starts back tomorrow.” You fill a twinge of guilt wash over you because Scott goes to Liberty High and you’re currently homeschooled. “You’ll be so busy with homework and sports that I won’t get to see you as often.” You pout.
“Y/n, you’re one of my top priorities don’t worry about any of that. I can always make time for my girl.” He smirks peppering your face with kisses.
“You’re too cute, Scott Reed. Too cute.” You chuckle rolling on top of him.
“Only for you y/l/n.” He winks pulling you back down to him so that he can easily wrap you in a hug. “I can’t wait for you to come see me play baseball in the Spring. The teams going to be great this year. We have so much to work for since Jeff Atkins isn’t with us anymore.” He slowly looks down, you can tell how close him and Jeff were. Losing a friend is always hard, especially if they were your closest teammate.
“Oh yeah. Just look for the loudest girl cheering in the bleachers every game. That will be me.” You genuinely smile feeling great about your relationship.
“Gotcha babe. Spring can’t come fast enough.” Scott chirps giving you a slow and passionate kiss.
Times skip to Spring
As your relationship with Scott progressed from the summer forward it seemed as if it couldn’t get any better. The world just seemed better when you and Scott were together and you couldn’t see yourself with anyone else. But of course nothing is perfect at all times.
Scott seemed to have been distancing himself lately and you honestly had no idea why. Things seemed to be perfect earlier but as soon as baseball season started he started going to parties with the team and not inviting you. Thoughts raced through your head wondering what you have done wrong but no logical explanation came to your mind except that Scott was either embarrassed of you or cheating on you. Actually no, Scott would never do that to you. But this still made no sense at all.
“Hey Scott, it’s y/n. Just wanted to check in and make sure the baseball game is tomorrow at 5?” You ended the voicemail feeling slightly awkward leaving a message. You were always a little awkward at phone calls and expressing your feelings when you aren’t face to face. Luckily Scott had invited you over this afternoon after practice so you could see him then.
“Hey.” You greet him with a kiss. “Did you get my voicemail earlier?”
“Oh yeah, I was just about to call you back but I remembered you were coming over today anyway.” He says moving out of the doorway letting you enter his home.
“Oh yeah that makes sense.” You mentally facepalm yourself.
“But coach rescheduled the game tomorrow for next week.” He says visibly frowning. “But I’ll try to see if you can get into that game.” He says instantly replacing his previous frown with a smile.
“Oh yeah, that’s fine. I just can’t wait to see my baby in action.” You giggle sitting down on the couch beside him.
“I’ll make sure we win just for you.” He places a soft kiss onto your lips. “But the team is a little shaky this year without Jeff and since there’s so much drama going around Liberty.”
“Drama? What happened?” This was the first time he’s told you about drama on the baseball team. Usually he makes it seem like they all walk on clouds and are perfect. Especially a boy named Bryce Walker. But you might be wrong.
“Ah well it’s nothing really.” He shrugs it off obviously not wanting to go into further detail.
“Oh alright.” You whisper feeling a little upset that he isn’t sharing his problems with you. “Well I hope everything turns around before the seasons over.” You try to lighten the mood.
“Doubt it.” He mumbles under his breath.
“What was that?” You question barely able to understand what he says.
“Oh um, I said let’s eat. My mom made us some dinner.” He stands up outstretching his hand towards you. “M’lady.” This makes you chuckle.
“Why thank you kind sir.” You meet his hand with yours and walk into the dining room with his parents. “Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Reed.” You smile receiving a hello back. They all begin to eat once you sit down and for awhile dinner goes by in complete silence. A silent dinner isn’t abnormal in the Reed household though. Scott usually isn’t home until late at night due to practice and both of his parents work crazy schedules. Mr. Reed breaks the silence though.
“So Scott, how was practice?” Mr. Reed asks after taking a bite of his food.
“It was pretty good. The team’s a little rusty right now.” He refuses to make eye contact.
“Well I hope that you guys can catch a few wins this season.” His dad laughs a little. “How is that Bryce kid doing?” When this question leaves his dad’s mouth you notice Scott physically freeze and look upet.
“I don’t really wanna talk about Bryce right now dad. I’m going to the bathroom.” Scott gets up and leaves the table.
“Sorry about that y/n, Scott’s been a little iffy lately with baseball.” Mrs. Reed apologizes
“It’s fine Mrs. Reed. Baseball is really important to Scott and he probably just wants to make you proud.” You smile at her before taking a bite of the mashed potatoes.
“Are you planning on coming to the game tomorrow?” Scott’s dad asks making you look up quicky.
“Oh they have a game tomorrow?” You question feeling slightly suspicious of Scott’s statement earlier.
“Yes, it is a home game at 5 pm.” Mrs. Reed chimes in.
“Hm alright. I will try my best to be there.” You mutter while attempting to force a smile. Scott comes back after that conversation and you pretend everything is fine. After dinner you make up an excuse to leave so that you can go home and clear your head.
Why would Scott lie to you? What is he hiding? These questions filled your head throughout the night, keeping you from falling asleep. Scott never lies to you. Never. Something is definitely wrong.
The next afternoon
You’re getting dressed for the baseball game when you receive a text from Scott.
Scott: Hey babe, I miss you so much. 😫
Y/n: I miss you too 😔
Scott: Maybe we could hang out later tonight?
Y/n: I’m actually busy tonight. But maybe tomorrow?
Scott: Tomorrow is fine with me (:
As you finish applying your makeup you grab your keys and begin heading out the door. Coming to Scott’s secret game could either be a really good idea or a really bad idea.
As you arrive you try to blend in with the crowd so that way Scott won’t notice you until later when you run up to him and hug him. The baseball game lasts for awhile and soon it’s the last inning and Scott is up to bat. The pitcher throws a fastball but Scott swings with just the right amount of force and speed to send it flying across the field and over the fence. He hit a homerun!
“Woo!!! Go baby!!!” You accidentally yell once he runs around the bases making it back home. He quickly turns around and spots you and forces a very uncomfortable smile onto his face. He gives a small wave and then walks back to the dugout with his teammates to celebrate their win. As fans begin to leave or go visit their kids you go wait by the dugout for Scott, hoping that he has come up with a good excuse as to why he would lie to you.
You feel a body move behind you and whip around to see a tall boxy boy standing a little too close for comfort. “Hey, haven’t seen you around here before.” The mysterious man says sticking out his hand in order for you to shake it.
“Yeah, this is my first time coming to a game.” You mumble praying that Scott walks out any second.
“Well a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be standing here all alone. Some guys around here are sleazy.” He says placing a hand on your shoulder. You shrug it off just as Scott exits the dugout and walks over to you.
“Bryce, get your hands off of my girlfriend.” Scott says throwing his stuff down on the ground and shielding you from the boy now known as Bryce.
“Reed chill. I was just getting to know her. Telling her how some guys around here do bad things to pretty girls.” He says eyeballing you. Immediately you feel uncomfortable and place your arms over your chest and slide behind Scott.
“Walker get the fuck away from us right now or I swear you’re going to regret ever looking at y/n.” Scott says stepping towards Bryce sizing him up.
“Dude calm down. I’m leaving. Way to ruin all of the fun.” He says walking back towards the dugout.
“Are you okay?” Scott says placing his hands on your arms searching your body for any signs of discomfort.
“Y-yes, I’m fine.” You stutter feeling scared of your previous surroundings. “He didn’t get to do anything because you showed up so thank you.” You look down at your feet afraid to meet his gaze. Why would he be friends with such terrible people?
“I’m really sorry you had to meet him. And I’m also super sorry that I lied to you about the game tonight.” He says tilting your chin up so that you can look at his face.
You nod. “Well now I see why you never invited me.” You roll your eyes at the situation. “I want to be mad at you but I do understand why you wouldn’t want me to be put in this kind of situation.”
“I never wanted to hurt you by lying, I just know some of the guys on this team aren’t the best people to introduce to girlfriends and I didn’t want you to be put in an uncomfortable situation like this.” He says blabbering on and on about how sorry he is.
“Scott it’s fine. I’m just happy you aren't embarrassed of me or something.” You chuckle making him become the one to look confused.
“You thought I was embarrassed of you?” He looks confused and you slowly nod your head. “Y/n, I would never in a million years be ashamed or embarrassed of you. You are the literal light of my life and I love to show you off. I just liked keeping our relationship private and away from all of the team because it helps me escape from all the drama while keeping you safe.” He holds your hands while looking into your eyes.
“Aw Scottie, I love you.” You giggle placing a kiss on the tip of his nose.
“I love you too. And I will never be able to tell you how thankful I am that you chose me.” He leans down to kiss you. The kiss is slow but yet passionate and you can feel just how much he loves you and never wants to let you go.
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1800-seungshine · 6 years
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birthday tears.
member: park woojin genre(s): fluff, romance, best friend!woojin summary: another year means another birthday to go all out and this time you were certain that you were going to make woojin cry but somehow, you find the tables have turned because after the long wait of seeing each other, you missed him. a lot more than you imagined. (requested - bullet point format) word count: 2.2k note: dedicated to life ruiner, cute snaggletooth baby park woojin ;; wheezes it’s his birthday today and so what better way to celebrate than to write!! goodness gracious i swear scintilla’s becoming woojin-centric, step aside ong someone’s taking over this damn lane jk jk. oh oh and thank you woojin anon for requesting < 33 it means so much
p.s. y’ALL IM SHOOK I DIDN’T EXPECT GETTING GOING OVER 100 NOTES FOR ‘IN LOCKED WITH YOU’ LIKE WHATDA- THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REBLOGS, LIKES AND FOLLOWS ;;; < 33 
you’ve been best friends with woojin for a long time 
no one knows him better than you 
bc you both had each other for practically all your life
were you and woojin the definition of bff goals?? hek yeah 
you’ve always been his number one supporter 
from his decision to being an idol 
to going with him during superstarK auditions 
to encouraging him when he was a jyp trainee and even when he transferred to bnm 
to never missing an episode of produce 101 and always voting for him
all the way till he joined wanna one 
you’re always there for him and you always will be 
and vice-versa
you’ve both leaned on each other through all the hard times
laughed during the good times
and everything in between 
back then as kids and before he decided to pursue the career of being an idol, it was you who depended on him
he was always the first person you ran to 
he was the one who you cried to 
he was your go-to when you were feeling down 
he was first when it came to everything and anything 
even love 
you didn’t expect falling for park woojin - the guy you knew all your life, the one who you grew up with, the person you considered a close friend, so close that you believed he was like family 
but circumstances changed, feelings grew and your perspective broaden
to the point where you had no choice but to accept that you were falling for your best friend
yet you didn’t want to selfishly hold him back when you knew how much he wanted to pursue his dream 
so woojin was your first love 
the first love you never confided to
and the first love you had let go 
whilst you both matured as you grew up, you eventually pushed your feelings aside as the tables began to turn
bc unlike before, woojin depended on you 
you were the one he first calls 
you were the person he leaned on
you were his go-to when things got too hard and the hardships of trying to reach his dream became overwhelming 
wowowow this sounds so sad and sappy okay gonna light up the mood from now on i promise 
but forget christmas, forget new years day, forget your own birthday 
november second is your favourite day 
why?? bc that was the day the lord decided to give you the best of friend you could ever ask for 
every year you two would go super extra to celebrate one another’s birthday 
like last year on your birthday, you came home with everything decorated and there was this huge teddy bear sitting on the corner of the living room
you knew it was from woojin bc duh who else would it be from 
but what you didnt know was that he was hiding inside the teddy bear 
and honestly you wouldn’t have suspected a single thing 
if the damn stuff toy didn’t begin to move 
you legit screamed and grabbed your baseball bat in case some weird ass munted hoe bursted through 
but jokes on you it was just woojin screaming “hAPPY BIRTHDAY!!” whilst popping streamers and throwing confetti 
his goal was to surprise you 
and he did it so damn well you began crying 
not tears of joy
just tears bc wth man why would you do that? 
but dont chu worry boo his ass got kicked 
his ass was further forgiven after he took you to the amusement park and treated you food 
so with that in mind, you had the goal of making him shed a tear as revenge 
doesn’t matter what kind of tear it is as long as that tear duct come into use 
dang you were so excited to go all out 
that you prepared everything one month prior his birthday
so with the help of the wanna one boys in sneaking woojin out
woojin ends up in this dance studio that you hired for the day 
everything was dimly lit by these candles placed all over the room 
and there’s this vcr that plays the slideshow you created with all your photos together since you were babies all the way till now 
you also added photos that brought back his dark past to get him embarrassed 
anndd then a video pops up of you with a breath-taking smile on your face, excitedly holding this ‘happy birthday’ banner
“about 18 years ago on this very day, some weird kid popped out into the world. can you guess who? that’s right! it’s you.” the video begins, showing you chuckling a little
“i swear i wasn’t planning to make this sappy but i’m going to anyway; i just want to thank you for putting up with my ass all these years - never have i faced a time where you weren’t there for me and i’m really really thankful to have you by my side. i know that you’re really busy and we haven’t seen each other but you can always run to me, you can always call me and i promise that i’ll try my hardest to be there for you, every step of the way like we always have and hopefully, like we always will. happy birthday idiot and take care of yourself.” 
woojin starts feeling touched, remembering all the good times you two have 
you two weren’t the type to verbalise things and instead expressed it through actions 
yet hearing your words makes him even more grateful for all the times that you’ve been there 
because even if you weren’t feeling the greatest, you pushed it aside in order to listen to his problems and help him 
no matter what time of day it was, you always picked up his call
remembering all this reminds him that he couldn’t ask for anything more 
because you were in his life 
and you always will be 
“happy birthday to you....happy birthday to you...” 
a chorus of voices interrupt his thoughts and he spins around to see you and the rest of the wanna one members entering through the door with a cake in jisung’s hands
tears well up in his eyes as all the emotions overwhelm him 
yet once his eyes meet yours, the world freezes almost as if time was slowing down
it’s been a long while since you saw him face to face
and he realises in that very moment how much he really missed you
bc despite all his offers of hanging out, you were cautious and worried that you’d cause trouble to his skyrocketing career
and you’d decline it even if you knew it was tempting and you knew he was disappointed every time you said no
there’s a slight hint of tiredness on his face but it doesn’t change the fact that seeing you made him brighter 
meanwhile you were unable to breathe; he grew more handsome than he already was before and that snaggletoothed smile, you grew up seeing and loving, adorned on his face melted your heart once more
now that you’ve met face to face after a time that felt like eternity
you couldn’t help but to run to him 
and he welcomed you with open arms as you snaked your arms around his waist 
who cares if the wanna one members will use this later on to tease him
having you right in front of me makes him forget about everything else
and like a child, you begin to cry as you’re engulfed in his embrace
“yah, are you crying...?” woojin teasingly asks you as his hand reaches up to your head, stroking your hair gently while your bury your head in his chest 
“s-shut up, meanie. i’m not crying!” you pull away before you look at him for a few seconds before bursting into tears once again
“ahhh this idiot, you’re such a crybaby.” he replies, wiping your tears with his sleeves. “and how am i mean? i’m offended.”
“i’ve seen you go through all the hard times, i’ve seen you cry because you wanted to give up and i’ve seen you push yourself over the limit for this dream and you’re telling me off for being a crybaby?” you say between sniffles before you try your hardest to manage a glare at his way
“and yes, you’re mean - you’re so mean for making my heart melt, you’re so mean for giving me butterflies in my stomach, you’re so mean for holding my hand and hugging me all the time without knowing how i feel, you’re so mean because no matter how much i try to hide my feelings, they continue to grow and it’s all your fault, park woojin.” 
you suddenly quiet down as you realise what you’ve been rambling. “oh my god, my mouth went a bit too far.” you mutter as you harshly wipe your tears away 
there’s silence between you two yet the rest of the wanna one members begin to snicker lightly to themselves
“this isn’t funny!” you whine before trying not to cry again bc you just exposed your own whipped ass 
you avoid woojin’s gaze by hiding behind jisung who subsequently came in the middle of you two, still holding the cake 
“so woojin! do you wanna blow the candles now before it ends up completely melting? but you have to make a wish first!” 
woojin clears his throat, taking his eyes away from you “a-ah yes hyung,” he says before closing his eyes for a few seconds and opening them again to blow the candles 
the rest of the guys, to lighten the slight tension in the atmosphere begin to clap and cheer, “happy birthday woojin!!” 
but yknow it aint complete yet until someone gets teased 
hence enter ong seongwoo’s ass (i love putting seongwoo everywhere, anywhere as you can tell by now)
“sO WOOJIN, WHAT DID YA WISH FOR BUDDY? ;)” 
“yeah what did you wish for?” jisung grins cheekily at the younger guy 
woojin’s ears start to go red, looking around before his gaze naturally land on you, “i just wished for something very very important.” 
“OK YEH WHICH IS??”  WINK WINK HONK HONK 
“for y/n to always be by my side.” woojin shyly mumbles 
sungwoon then joins in on the fun with a wide grin on his face, bringing his ear close to woojin, “sorry, what? can you speak up a little louder? we couldn’t hear.” 
“yeah i’m a little deaf, hyung.” guanlin adds before a number of agreements and remarks gets thrown around the room causing noise 
woojin simply sighs before yelling, “I SAID I WISHED FOR Y/N TO ALWAYS BE BY SIDE.” 
much cringe. v cheese. im writing this and i cant even handle wowow
there’s just silence in the room before the wanna one members all grin happily at one another. 
“oH wOw lOoK aT tHe TiMe - okay kids, time to go! we’ll see you later woojin byeeee.” minhyun calls out as he exits the door with the rest following beside him, not forgetting to snicker and tease
and then there was two 
you and woojin
“so,,, what do you say?” he initiates, feeling a little nervous than usual bc good lord he’s liked you all this time since you two were little and every year he’d wish for that you’d like him back 
you simply continue looking down, still avoiding his gaze; “you’re not kidding right...?” 
“does it sound like i am?” 
“no.” 
“so....? i like you, you like me. the feelings’ mutual.” 
“but what about-”
“don’t think about the but’s nor the if’s because i don’t care about those. i’ve liked you for as long as i’ve known you and honestly, i can risk everything and anything so long as you’re here. there’s no park woojin without y/n. i’m basically nothing without you.” 
you look up as you send him a judging look, “did you just promote your upcoming comeback whilst confessing...?” 
“that totally wasn’t intentional but what do you say?” woojin says to you grinning rather happily as his arms are wide open for you. 
and having a soft spot for him, you eventually let out a sigh, “well if you put it that way...i don’t seem to have a choice, do i?” you say before going into his arms once more. 
“this has got to be my best birthday present ever.” woojin sighs in content
“don’t think i’m still not done yet from my rant- do you know how much i wanted to vote for other trainees? yah, park woojin i voted for you every single performance - i wanted to vote for jihoon but because i liked you so much and you’re my best friend, i kept being loyal but here you were teasing me and calling me a crybaby. i’m not even kidding, oh my god- the amount of suffering i went through because of you; you should be glad i like you.”
“yes yes, i’m sorry. i won’t tease you again, crybaby.” 
“it hasn’t even been a minute and you’re seriously tempting me to leave you for jihoon.” 
“ah i was just kidding, y/n. don’t break up with me for my other pink sausage duo-” 
“nOPE BYE WHERE’S THE DIVORCE PAPERS.” 
“AWE COME ON I WAS KIDDING.”
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abadoodlesss · 6 years
Text
Sometimes The Job’s Worth It - Chapter Five
Read previous chapters here
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Summary: More like chapter 4.5 bc of the cliffhanger last time, sorry not sorry. Jane finally deals with the thoughts that have been haunting her mind.
Jane took advantage of the distraction provided by the Impala to punch the demon square in the jaw.
That sounded more badass than it was.
In reality, she flung her fist out, successfully hitting the demon but not very hard; it was enough to stun him for a second, though. Jane started sprinting towards the Impala as the headlights faded away and two car doors opened and slammed shut.
“You little bitch.” The demon muttered, teleporting in front of Jane after quickly recovering from her punch.
Jane screamed, in both surprise and fear, but she was quick to knee the demon between his legs. She wasn’t exactly sure if it would be effective, being an all-powerful demon and all, but low and behold, he toppled over.
“Amateur.” She heard the female demon groan before she too teleported in front of Jane, separating her from the Winchesters.
“Not so fast, sweet pea.” She said in a sickly sweet voice, her smile wide but her demon eyes glaring coldly.
“Duck!” Dean called, still several yards away. Jane dropped to her knees as she heard the demon wailing above her.  
Castiel appeared behind Jane’s crouched form, hand outstretched, fingers splayed as he rested his palm against the demon’s forehead. Jane glanced up in time to see the demon’s eyes and mouth glow a blinding white before he crumpled to the ground beside her.
Jane scrambled away from the demon, backing herself into Castiel’s legs. He helped her to her feet, eyes taking note of any cuts or scrapes on her body.
Sam and Dean soon joined the two, walking away from the limp body of the second demon as it’s shadowy form flew overhead.
“That was a close one.” Jane said, trying to lighten the mood as three stoic men towered above her, staring down at her with furrowed brows.
“What were you thinking?” Dean asked, his voice gruff.
Jane cast her gaze to the tips of her shoes. She was too embarrassed to make eye contact. She knew what she had done was stupid. Running out of the hotel room, late at night in a town she didn’t know; she would be more surprised if she wasn’t attacked by something, demons or not. She scolded herself for having her little temper tantrum, but she knew Dean was about to chastise her further, with good reason.
“That was reckless and stupid, not to mention dangerous.” He continued.
“I know.” Jane said as she rubbed her arm sheepishly.
“Had we been a few seconds later, who knows what would have happened.”
“We were worried about you.” Sam said, trying to balance out Dean’s aggressive tone.
“I’m sorry.” She said quietly, still hanging her head in shame.
“You should be. I don’t what I would have done with myself if you got hurt, kid.”
“You gotta give me a little credit, I totally had them for a few seconds.” She said, mentally kicking herself for cracking a joke while being reprimanded.
Sam let out a chuckle and Dean smirked, though. They couldn’t stay mad at her for long.
“We’re going to have to teach you how to really punch, that was pathetic.” Sam said, nodding his head back to the demon Jane ‘punched’.
“Let’s head back.” Dean said, the group heading to the car. Jane climbed into the back with Castiel. “Don’t think you’re off the hook though, kid.” Dean said, sliding into the front seat.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
Jane was digging through the closet to try to find a blanket to wrap herself in. She was still shivering from being outside for so long without a jacket.
The boys, however, were huddled together, whispering about what to do. Dean was already over Jane’s impromptu adventure into the night, he could easily forgive and forget that, but whatever was going on with Jane earlier was a different story.
“I still don’t think it’s a good idea.” Sam said warily.
Dean wanted to at least entertain the idea that Cas could help rid Jane of her negative memories. After Cas explained what he learned about Jane while Sam and Dean were at the bar, albeit very briefly as he was afraid to reveal too much, Dean was more driven than ever to help Jane forget.
“What else do we have then?”
“We can let her cope.” Sam argued, very strong in his opinion.
“She shouldn’t have to do that alone, Sammy.”
“She isn’t. Erasing her memory isn’t the way to help, being there for her is.”
“I would have to agree with your brother, Dean. It’s not normal to just erase unpleasant memories.” Castiel added.
“When is anything we do normal?”
Sam just sighed.
“You guys alright over there?” Jane called, wrapped up snuggly in a blanket on Sam’s bed, chowing down on the rest of her Snicker’s bar.
“Let’s just talk to her.” Sam whispered.  
Dean grumbled but complied nonetheless. He hated when Sam was right.  
He walked over to her. “Hey, kiddo, can we talk for a second?”
Jane looked up at him, a string of caramel hanging out of her mouth. “Uh, yeah.” She said hesitantly, wiping her mouth as Dean took a seat on his bed, across from her. “Before you start though, let me just reiterate that I’m sorry for running out and almost getting myself killed.” She said. “Also sorry for slapping you.” She called to Castiel, who nodded in response. “Okay, now you can ground me but if we’re being real, that was pretty sweet of me to be so apologetic so I don’t think my punishment should be that harsh.” She defended.
“That’s not what this is about.” Sam said, coming to stand beside his brother.
“Oh?”
“I’m not going to push you,” Dean started, getting right to the point, “but you can talk to us about what’s going on.”
Jane wanted to roll her eyes, not this again. “Glad to know, but I don’t have anything to say right now.” She got up to end the conversation but Dean grabbed her arm, shoving her lightly back to the bed so they could keep talking.
“Cut the shit. You ran out of the bathroom crying today, something’s bothering you and we just want to help you. I promise there’s no judgment kid.” Dean said in an aggressively caring way.
Jane looked down, fidgeting with her hands in her lap. She was silent. She didn’t want to talk about it because they were lying. They would judge her.
Sam sat down on the bed, picking at the scratchy blanket. “Whatever you’re going through, I can promise you, we understand.”
Jane remained silent as she clutched her body.
“If it’s about your family-” Dean started but trailed off, unsure of how to continue. “We know what it’s like to lose people you care about.” He said.
Jane stared up at him, her eyes getting watery.
“We know how hard it is. We know how hopeless and lost you feel. But I promise you we can help.”
“It’s more than that.”
“What do you mean?” Sam asked, leaning forward a bit more, intrigued.
“You’re not wrong.” Jane clarified after a moment, contemplating if she wanted to come clean now. “I miss my family with all my heart. I would do anything to get them back but I know I don’t deserve that.”
Dean and Sam just looked at her, unsure if they were hearing her correctly.
“I let them get killed, I didn’t do- I did nothing and now-” Tears were flowing freely down her cheeks. She wept into her hands, trying to hold herself together but it wasn’t working, she kept sobbing.
Dean kneeled on the floor in front of Jane. He gently took hold of her hands, drawing them away from her face. He gave a kiss to her knuckles as he held her delicate hands in his tanned ones.
He stared into her big eyes with his matching green ones. It hurt to see her cry. He cared so much for Jane and he would do anything to take this pain away.
Letting go of her slender hands, Dean cupped her cheek lightly, wiping tears away with his thumbs.
“It is not your fault.” He spoke sternly.
“But-” Jane blubbered, half choking on a sob threatening to rip out of her throat.
Dean still held her face, forcing her to look into his eyes. “It is not your fault.”
She sobbed again, melting to Dean’s body. He held the back of her head as she wept into his shoulder, gently rocking her back and forth like she were a baby he was trying to lull to sleep.
When her breathing became less sporadic and she was calming down, Dean pulled away. “We want to help you. Cas here can take away those memories, you won’t have to think about it anymore.”
Jane took in a shaky breath before speaking. “Mia, she- she won’t let me forget.”
The men in the room glanced at each other, Cas slightly more confused with his lack of context, but even he knew this was something of concern.
“Jane, Mia’s dead.” Sam spoke.
“No, no, I know that. I’m not crazy. Well, not all the way, it’s just-” She took in another breath, calming herself. “Mia’s been following me around. Every time I see her it’s a reminder of what happened.”
“Mia is dead, sweetheart, she isn’t following you.” Dean said, getting worried.
“I know, but she is. At first, I thought it was really her but-” She trailed off, not wanting to really say it, if she didn’t it felt less real.
“But what?” Sam pressed.
“But now I think I’m imagining her.” She whispered, unable to look at anything other than a now particularly interesting loose string on her shirt.
“How long has this been happening?” Sam asked, getting more concerned.
“Well at first it was just a dream, then little glimpses of her when I was alone. I thought my brain was just playing tricks but then I swear I heard her speaking to me.” Jane confessed. “That’s why I left the CVS bathroom crying, I talked to her and she said she was all in my head.”
Everyone was silent for a moment. With each second that passed, Jane’s heartbeat grew louder and faster. This was exactly what she feared. She watched as Dean looked to Sam, communicating silently.
She grabbed onto Dean’s arm. “I swear I’m not crazy, please Dean you have to believe me.”
“You’re not being crazy. This is your own mind projecting your guilt. You feel like you don’t deserve to forget so your mind isn’t letting you, in the form of Mia giving you constant reminders.” Castiel deduced, coming around to stand beside Sam.  
“Sounds crazy to me.” Jane said with a weak laugh.
“Why didn’t you tell us earlier?” Dean asked. “This could have been a real threat to your safety, Jane.”
“I was just afraid. I thought that you’d think I was crazy. Or maybe you’d think that there was a demon tracking us and that you’d be better off ditching me. I thought you’d think I wasn’t worth all the trouble and just leave me. I didn’t want to lose you guys.” She said a million miles a minute, having no filter with her thoughts.
Sam came over to her, kneeling to meet her height as he placed a firm hand on her shoulder. “We would never leave you.” He spoke firmly. “You’re family now.”
A smile instantly lit up Jane’s, unable to tell if the tears pricking her eyes were happy or sad at this point. God, she was so emotional. “Thanks, Sammy.”
Sam was a little shocked that she used that name, only Dean called him Sammy. He hated when anyone else did, well that’s to say he usually did. Hearing Jane use that name felt right. It didn’t annoy him, didn’t make him angry, but rather it made him feel warm in his chest.
He gave her a smile and ruffled up her hair a little before getting back up.
“Cas, can we still help her with this?” Dean asked.
“Angels have the power to alter entire realities, I am capable of this.” Castiel spoke, in his ever monotone voice but hints of sass were laced in there.
“It’s up to you kid, but Cas can help. He can take away these memories, he can take away Mia.” Dean said.
Jane thought for a moment. It would make everything so much easier. Forgetting all about her family and just believing that she was always a Winchester, it was the perfect solution, yet it felt wrong.
The whole point of problems is that they’re difficult, but when you’ve moved past them, you've come out stronger. Jane wanted to be stronger, she didn’t want the easy way out, no matter how tempting it was.
“No, this isn’t something I should forget. I have to learn to cope and to move on, like everybody else.” She said soundly. She saw Sam’s lips curl into a smile as he looked at her, giving a small nod. He must have felt the same way. Jane felt a twinge of warmth in her heart, knowing Sam was proud of her.
“Are you sure.” Dean said. “It’s okay Jane, you deserve to be happy.”
“I am.” She said. “Because I have the two best brothers in the world, who care so much about me. That’s all I need.”
“Stop being such a chick.” Dean joked, wrapping an arm around Jane’s shoulders as he pulled her into a side hug. Sam joined in too.
“I could do without the whole Mia thing, though.” Jane said, pulling away.
“Certainly.” Castiel said, taking a hand to her forehead. There was a glow, but Jane felt no different. She supposed time would only tell if it worked.
“Thank you.”
“Of course. Now, if I’m no longer needed.” and suddenly Castiel was gone.
“He’s strange.” Jane said. “I like him.”
The brothers just laughed.
“It’s about time for bed.” Dean said, noticing it was almost midnight.
“Dean, c’mon, you’re supposed to be cool. What’s with the bedtime?”
“We got a long day of driving to do, you need rest.”
“I can just sleep in the car tomorrow.”
“Stop finding loopholes and go brush your teeth.”
Muttering under her breath, Jane went to the bathroom and grabbed her toothbrush. She surveyed the room silently, waiting for Mia’s form to appear, but it never came.
Nice work, Castiel. She thought with a smile.
Spitting into the sink, Jane wiped off her mouth. She took the time to braid her hair before heading off to bed.
Luckily they managed to get two queen beds. Sam took one for himself, but at least this way Jane could spread out on her side of the bed she shared with Dean.
She climbed under the covers, switching off the lamp on the bedside table next to her face.
“Goodnight, bug.” Dean said with a yawn.
She broke out into a smile that one else saw. “Goodnight.”
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rhainontheshelves · 7 years
Text
Rebuilt #4 - Convince
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Part 1: You Were Never There Part 2: Return Part 3: A New Perspective Member: Baekhyun {EXO} not really its more Chanyeol than anything tbh Genre: Fluff, a hint of angst?? Word Count: 1502 A/N: First of all, this chapter is dedicated to @anechdochegoddess. She motivated me to finish this part and pretty much this fic. Thank you for your enthusiasm! I hope you like it! For everyone else, feel free to hate me bc I've been keeping you waiting for almost four months. Also, a warning: this might be confusing as hell. Happy reading! - Rhin     "How did you guys convince me to do this again?" you asked Hye and Sehun for what it seemed like the millionth time.     "(Y/N), relax. It's just the seven others," Sehun sighed. "Baekhyun hyung is off doing other things, Suho hyung said that he wouldn't be back anytime soon."     "Okay... I guess I can still trust you," you teased, trying to lighten the mood in your soul. It didn't work, but Hye snickered so you smiled anyway. The elevator doors opened and you stepped out into a familiar hallway filled with doors to dance studios. You walked toward studio 4 out of habit; it was the studio you always went to when you met up with the guys, usually bearing gifts consisting of a case of water and boxes of takeout.     "(Y/N)! We're in 7 now!" Sehun called to you, pointing over his shoulder.     "Oh yeah, right." you murmured to yourself. You vaguely remembered him mentioning it on the ride up. Embarrassed, you quickly switched directions and took long strides to catch up to Sehun and Hye, who were already at the door to the correct studio.     At first, you lost your grip on the doorknob due to sweaty palms, which caused it to jiggle. All noise inside the room ceased, which was saying something because you knew from experience that these walls and doors were thick. It made you even more nervous, the new wave actually making you take a step back. Sehun glanced over at Hye, rolled his eyes, and opened the door. Hye practically shoved you inside. They high-fived before entering the studio as well.     You found all curious eyes on you when you straightened up. You suddenly felt immensely self-conscious. Was your eyeliner smudged? Your bun falling apart? Was your shirt see through? You inwardly cringed as you forced yourself to smile, wave and greet your ex-boyfriend's bandmates. "Hello..."     "Hi (Y/N)!" Lay called from his spot over by the mirrored wall. He ran over to you and give you a bear hug. "It's been so long! How have you been?"     Soon, everyone else followed Lay's actions and they gathered around you, giving you hugs and their condolences at your mother's passing. You brushed the latter off with "thank you"s and "it's okay"s, but gladly accepted the hugs. Slowly, you started feeling comfortable in their presence again. Three months was a long time to not see people, and how close they were to Baekhyun made the walled, cautious side of you want to be even more distant with them. But the walls started to come down as they told you stories about current events in their lives, teased each other, and were just their dorky selves. Maybe being with them would heal the wound Baekhyun left in your soul.     You spent the rest of their practice with them. You got previews of new choreography, of how concerts were going to go, general stuff. At the end, Suho jokingly made you swear not to leak anything,  knowing full well that you wouldn't. You agreed anyway.     "Would you like to come back to the dorms with us?" Jongin asked as the group started filing out of the room.     "I would love to!" you replied, but Chanyeol was quick to change that plan.     "I don't think that 's the best idea, Baekhyun just texted me and said that he's done with his schedules and he's back at the dorm." He came and put a hand on your shoulder. "Sorry, maybe next time."     "Oh, okay." you felt slightly disappointed, but at the same time you weren't ready to face Baekhyun yet. "I should get going then - wait, where's Hye?"     "I saw her leave already..." Kyungsoo commented, slinging a duffel bag over his shoulder.     "What? She left? What kind of friend..." you grumbled. You bet she took off to some "appointment" she just remembered. Did she think it was fun to drag you to places you initially refused to go to and then leave you there? It happened couple of times in the past, and you swore to her that you would knock a tooth or two loose the next time she did it on purpose.     "Do you have a ride home, (Y/N)?" Chanyeol asked as he turned off the light and locked up the practice room.     "No, she left me." You said, exasperated.     "Well, I could take you, if you want me to."     "That would be nice, thanks Channie."     It got a bit more tense every minute. The silence wasn't awkward, but you could tell Chanyeol was building up the courage to say something. You had known him the longest out of the nine, so sometimes you could almost read his mind. Still, it had been a while, so you didn't coax it out of him. Staying silent through two different, but familiar, turns, you wondered if he actually was conscious of the destination. Was his brain or was heart guiding his hands?     "Did you really expect me to forget where my old apartment was?" you asked, a bit sarcastically, as the car stopped in front of a complex.     "No... just..." pain crossed his face and settled in his expression. "Ugh! You know how they post the for rent signs in the windows? Look in yours."     Confused, you turned your attention to the complex again. Counting up four floors, two windows to the left from the center, you found a huge red sign. It took you a minute to register the meaning.     "He moved out of  the apartment?" You asked Chanyeol, genuinely surprised. "He said we would live there... as long as we could..."     A blocked-out memory came flooding back. Lying on the couch with Baekhyun and a glass of wine, making plans for the future. Baekhyun getting excited over how many children you two would have (the decided number was three). How you would go and pick a house when it was time and he would buy it no matter how expensive (well.... he wouldn't if it was over a certain figure. He didn't have that high of a paycheck) but the apartment would have to work for the time being. Baekhyun getting stuck on the children subject again. Just a night of happiness and planning.      Remembering a time when you were happy with Baekhyun hurt. But now, seeing how he had moved out, you knew it hurt him, too.     "I get the point, Chanyeol. You can drive away now." you said quietly.     Chanyeol nodded, revving the engine up again, he started in the direction of Hye's house.     "He's really quiet now. He sulks all the time, too."         "That's to be expected. He did that whenever something he didn't like happened."     "No, it's.... more extreme. He'll still put on a happy face for the public, but in our dorm room he'll just stare at the ceiling for hours. He doesn't talk, he spends more time on his phone, he's just... more isolated and secluded than he has been in a really long time."     You let that sink in for a bit. You had never seen Baekhyun act that way; especially around you. You had a hard time picturing it.     "He really misses you, (Y/N)."     "I miss him, too."     At that statement, Hye's house came in sight. Chan smoothly pulled up beside it, putting the car into park. Being the gentleman he is, he quickly got out and opened your door for you. Smiling, you got out and swiftly hugged Chanyeol.     "Thanks for bringing me back."     "No problem." He hugged you back. It felt comforting. Your best friend was coming back.     "And thanks for the update. I needed it."     "I needed it too, believe me." Chanyeol chuckled.     "Well.. see ya then." Awkwardly, you made your way to Hye's door.     "Wait! (Y/N)..." Chanyeol ran up after you and caught your shoulder. "The group, the rest of the guys... we've - we've been planning a thing... would you be up to seeing him? Just seeing him, saying hi? You could leave after that, we just want to lift his spirit."     At first, the idea sounded like a good one. You could just see him, give him a chance to apologize, and move on. But, in the back of your head, a suspicion grew until you had to voice it. "Are you trying to get me back with him?"     "No!" Chanyeol denied.     "Yes, I can hear it in your voice. No! He cheated on me, I will not get back together with a man that has no control over his lust." You said firmly.     "I wasn't expecting you to! Now please, can I just convince you to come back to the dorm next week so we can tell you our plan?"     "Hmmmm... as long as you tell me one thing."     "What?"       "What happened to all my stuff in the apartment?"         "We brought it all here, before Baek did anything drastic. Didn't you notice?"       You hadn't. That explained why everything in the guest room closet fit you.       "Alright, I'll come."
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deansoutros · 7 years
Text
Black [M]
A/N: sorry it took so long for this one :( i’m sorry if it’s kind of shitty i rushed to finish this bc i had ppl asking for it :/ also fuck you chi
characters: dean x oc, zico x oc, crush, rome
genre: angst(ish?), university au
rated: m, alcoholism, stoners(lol), violence, (mentions of) abuse, sexual content(not in this ch)
CH1 CH2 
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chapter 3: 
my mouth dropped slightly and I acted surprised but I knew she was going to say that. everyone had their mouths open in a small smile. I looked up at dean, his expression mirrored mine. sochi smiled proudly, pushing the black cup back to me.  
“drink up” she said. I didn’t know what to do. I was well aware that I was pretty drunk now and drinking from that cup would end me but I couldn’t kiss dean. he was perfectly sober. I knew I might not remember it later but he would. kissing him would make things awkward between us and that was the last thing we needed right now. if this had happened a week ago, I would’ve probably done it because he’s my best friend and the kiss would mean nothing more than a save from the cup but now, he knew something about me. he knew something that made us closer than before and I knew something about him. i couldn’t do it.
everyone looked at me waiting for me to either jump on dean or drink. I looked at dean one last time before sighing, taking the cup sochi had pushed toward me. she snickered in victory as I looked at the contents inside the cup.  I felt all eyes on me and as I brought the cup to my lips, it was taken out of my hands.
“you’re really drunk okay. I’m not letting you drink that.” dean set the cup on the table and crush immediately began laughing. everyone began chanting “kiss him” except for sochi. this had become more than she intended, everyone began pressuring me and I felt like I was about to burst. I grabbed the cup and quickly chugged. my perception of time was off but I counted the five seconds.
“that’s enough” zico ripped the cup from my hands and I wiped my mouth with my sleeve. I got up and set my own drink on the table. I was upset now.
“happy?!” I looked at sochi before storming out the front door.
“chae wait-“ zico followed me out and I heard the room behind me go silent.
I walked out to the lawn, and leaned against the wall with my head back. zico closed the door behind him and stood next to me with his hands in his pockets.
“you okay?” he didn’t look at me, instead he looked straight ahead. I didn’t reply, I still felt the burning sensation of the mixture of tequila, vodka, rum and wine coating my mouth, throat and slowly covering my stomach.
“here” he handed me a water bottle and I took it. I drank it until the taste layering over my tongue was washed out. my face felt warm and I could tell that the drink I just took would hit me soon. a trail of heat formed down my chest to my stomach and for a minute I felt like it would come up but I managed to contain it. we both stayed silent for a while, he waited for me to be ready to talk.
“you don’t need to be out here I just needed some air” I said.
“I want to be out here” he replied with no hesitation.
“you shouldn’t have drank that if you didn’t want to” he continued.
“I didn’t have an option”
“you did and you know you did”
“I didn’t want to kiss him zico, fuck off”
“but you did. listen, we all know there’s something there. we all see it. no one says anything because you both make it so…obvious. even when he was still dating heoyang, he would be with you more than with her. you don’t think we all see how much you care about each other? I don’t know if you both are really that stupid or if you’re pretending you are. you’re falling for each other in a very genuine way or else why would you even think about drinking? if I got that dare with nayeon I would kiss her because there’s nothing there. we aren’t compatible and we never will be. she’s a great friend and I love her to bits but not like that. a kiss would mean nothing, but you hesitated and I saw his face too. just like you, he wanted it but he didn’t want anything to be ruined because he cherishes you. you both know what’s really going on here and you’re scared of what will come after.”
“shut up! just shut up! you don’t know what you’re talking about okay. that’s my best friend not just some random person. would you kiss your best friend?!”
“I’d kiss dean if it saved me from that cup. fuck yeah” I groaned in response and hung my head down.
“I don’t like dean like that why does everyone think I do? I act with him the same way I act with you, so do I want to date you too now?!”
“no, you treat me like I’m your brother, a very handsome brother but nonetheless, a brother. you treat dean like, well like he’s your world. I’m probably exaggerating but why were you so sad all week? you were upset, why? because he wasn’t around.” he sighed. “I didn’t tell you this because I know he said it when he was drunk but, every time I called him he talked about you. if I was in his place all I would talk about is heoyang and how fucked up she was but he barely mentioned her. he talked about you. about how bad he felt calling you all those things, about how scared he was to apologize. you both just need to-“
“please stop, stop talking.” I felt so overwhelmed. I was barely able to stand anymore and I felt like zico had been screaming at me. I know he didn’t mean harm in his words at all but for some reason I began aching. while he was talking, I was trying so hard to convince myself that his words were lies. I was being bombarded with feelings I didn’t even know if dean had or not. I felt like everyone had been screaming at me about this except the one person I needed to. I began regretting even agreeing to this stupid night. I shouldn’t have drank or smoked, I know that when I’m intoxicated my emotions are amplified times a million and a situation that isn’t that big turns into life and death to me. it was so annoying that I was thinking this way but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop thinking about it all.
“I like what I have with him, I don’t want anything to change. this is the first person I’ve ever opened up to.” before I knew it I had tears running down my cheeks. “why do you all keep pressuring me? have you ever thought that maybe just maybe if I liked dean I would have done something about it already? you all think you know everything and you don’t. stop assuming shit” I dropped the half-filled bottle of water and stumbled my way toward the parking lot. zico ran after me, grabbing my hand but I only fought with him.
“let me go zico!” I hollered. “I’m just going for a walk okay”
“you’re shitfaced, stop, you aren’t going anywhere chaeyeon” I tripped over the parking bumper and zico quickly tried to get me up but I refused. I dropped my face into my hands, tears pouring down my face for no reason besides the alcohol. I was no longer in control of my body, physically or emotionally. I kept repeating that I needed to throw up in between sobs. I felt zico hook his arms around me and pick me up. he carried me back to the boys place and everyone got up the second we went in.
“what the fuck is she okay?” christian examined me.
“chaeyeon-“ sochi seemed horrified and everyone came closer. I kept my hands covering my face and I felt zico tense up.
“everyone back up, don’t come near her it’s going to make it worse just give her some breathing space. I’m taking her to the bathroom okay? no one come in she’s fine she’s just really fucked up so give her some room.” zico held onto me before whispering to someone “where is he?”
“he got mad too, he went to his room” I could barely recognize crush’s voice. zico forced my arms around his neck and he carried me like a child. he took me to the bathroom and kicked dean’s door on the way there. once we were in the bathroom he set me down on the floor and I heard dean’s door swing open.
“what? who the fuck kicked the door?”
“dean, bathroom now” zico yelled. the familiar footsteps came closer and I couldn’t stop sobbing. zico leaned me against the toilet and I fought him until I saw the door open.
“what the fuck?!” dean rushed to me, brushing my hair out of my face. all I was thinking about was how disgusting I looked. I pushed him away and hid my face in zico’s chest. I felt so embarrassed.
“chaeyeon come here” dean grabbed my arm and I shoved him away again.
“zico get out”
“nah bro she needs help”
“get out I got it”
“dean-“
“would I let anything happen to her?” zico sighed and released me.
“if you need something call me over okay” he walked out and closed the door behind him.
dean instantly took his spot. he sat next to me, leaning against the tub and he pulled me onto his lap. I was still sobbing like I was 2 years old.
“hey, hey it’s okay, you’re okay. no need to cry. I’m right here chae.” my arms wrapped around his neck and I rested my head against his shoulder. he continued to brush my hair out of my face. I felt my eyes puffy and I knew they were red. I looked up at him and he grabbed his sleeve, wiping tears off my cheeks.
“you’re okay chae. it’s all right, breathe.”
“I’m sorry” I managed to mumble out.
“for what? you did nothing wrong babe”
“I’m a mess, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. and I’m sorry to zico too” I was slightly more calm now, dean had been rubbing my back and it was soothing, his touch was soothing.
“zico would murder someone if you asked him to. as for me, you can make it up to me by doing my chemistry homework yeah?” his lips curled into that smile I loved so much and I tittered. he stroked my hair back, his eyes were practically glued on me. I gently hit his shoulder before hiding my face in the crook of his neck. my cheeks felt hot and I had suddenly felt self-conscious.
“stop looking at me”
“why? because you look like crap?” I looked up at him and tears began forming in my eyes again.
“no, no I was joking chae- I’m sorry I was trying to lighten up the mood” he reached across the toilet to grab some toilet paper and began wiping my nose.
“you look beautiful, you always do. the more I see you every day, the prettier you become. even right now, you look adorable”
“dean are you sober?” he nodded.
“you haven’t drank anything?” I persisted.
“besides two glasses of water, nope. what about you?” I let out a small chuckle, tightening my hold on him.
“did zico make you cry? should I punch him?” he asked.
“no no I just felt, overwhelmed. can I ask something?”
“what is it?” I closed my eyes and rested against his chest. I wasn’t thinking properly and I replayed zico’s words in my head.
“I don’t want to move” the tiny sober part inside me prohibited me from asking what I really intended.
“that isn’t a question, silly. if you want to stay here, we will. if you want to sleep here, I’ll be your pillow” god, he was being so adorable.
“can you carry me to bed? if I get up everything’s going to spin more than it is now” I mumbled sleepily.
DEAN’S POV
I stood up and bent down, linking my arms under hers. I picked her up and her arms draped around my neck whilst her legs did the same around my waist. she laid her cheek against my shoulder and I felt her hair cover my back. when we exited the bathroom, sochi noticed and rushed over, asking if she was okay. I nodded to reassure her.
“she just needs sleep, I’m going to put her to bed don’t worry” she hesitantly agreed. I could tell she was full of regret. I knew she probably thought she upset both chaeyeon and I, which she did but she didn’t know how chaeyeon would react, neither did I.
I kicked my bedroom door open, pulling the sheets back from my bed before setting her down. she was practically knocked out when I put her down. I pulled the sheets over her and she incoherently mumbled as I made my way out.
“what chae?”
“don’t go” I was barely able to make out her words.
“I’ll be right back okay, I’m going to grab some water for you” she hummed in response and I flicked the light off, leaving the door cracked.
as soon as I walked out, everyone stopped talking and looked at me.
“she okay man?” christian put his drink down and glanced at me.
“she’s okay, she just needs to sleep it off.” I turned to look at the girls, giving them a pressed smile. “don’t worry, she’s staying here, I’ll take the couch tonight and I’ll take care of her throughout the night.”
“thanks” sochi got up and made her way to the door, jisu and nayeon followed. “she tends to kick and hit in her sleep, just in case” the thought of her sleeping recklessly amused me. I could imagine her hitting sochi and denying it the next morning.  
sochi looked down and nayeon led her out. I took a look at everyone. they were all drunk, especially sochi and crush. as the girls exited I grabbed a bottle of water from the counter. the guys were picking up the cans and pizza boxes laying in the living room. I motioned zico to come.
“you should go with sochi, I have a feeling she’s going to be chaeyeon 2.0 in about 5 minutes. she had a lot to drink and she feels guilty. go with them” he turned to look at the girls. nayeon had her arms around sochi’s shoulders. she was slouchy and hung her head.
“yeah, you’re right. I’ll be back in the morning” he followed after the girls, grabbing his phone before walking out.
“I’m going to bed guys, night” a collective “goodnight” rang from their mouths. they all sounded dead and I could tell they were tired.
I carefully walked into the room, trying not to make any noise. I placed the water bottle on the nightstand next to my bed before grabbing a blanket from the closet and settling down on the couch across the room. just as I was about to fall asleep, a groan came from chaeyeon’s direction. I opened my eyes and saw her moving. I kept an eye on her to make sure she wouldn’t fall off but she began to breathe quicker and quicker, whining. she was probably having a nightmare.
I tossed the blanket off me and got up, gently shaking her.
“chae wake up it’s a dream” it took her a couple of minutes before she opened her eyes. her breathing was heavy and rapid.
“it’s okay you were dreaming. go back to sleep” she took a hold of my arm, tugging me to her.
“sleep with me” she murmured. she was still half asleep but she wouldn’t release my arm. I tried to relieve myself from her grip but she refused to let go. she began whining and I stopped struggling with her. she looked so childlike. her lips jutted out in a pout but her eyes remained closed. her fingers grasped around my wrist but her touch was gentle, so gentle I got goosebumps the more I thought about it. I gave in, pushing her to her side as I slid under the covers. I maintained my distance from her but she reached for my hand, draping my arm around her. I chuckled and she leaned into my chest. her arm coiled over my torso and she hugged me as if I was a plush.
I stroked her hair as I thought about what crush had told me earlier. after chaeyeon walked out earlier tonight, zico stopped me from going after her. I swear it was like all of them had planned this. I was upset that sochi would put her in such an unfair situation and to top it off zico refused to let me go out so I went to my room. crush had come in a couple of minutes later and basically lectured me. he may have girls around him all the time but when the man’s in love, he knows what he’s doing. in fact, he’s the reason I began dating heoyang. crush’s words rang in my head.
“listen bro, I don’t want to get too feely right now but I think this is it. I’m sure zico is telling her the same thing I’m telling you but you both need to come to terms. I personally do not think y’all are going to last in this awkward in between ground for long, then again, I’m not you and I really don’t know how you feel. from an outsider’s perspective, to be brutally honest, in the past almost two months, I’ve seen you happier. even with this heoyang bullshit happening. you’re probably just as oblivious as her if not more. at first, we all thought it was just both of you ignoring it and we slowly came to the realization that neither one of you actually recognizes what’s happening. dean, when was the last time you met a girl and didn’t hook up with her? even your relationship with heoyang began like that. y’all were fuck buddies and before her, you’d have a different girl here every weekend dude. we used to talk about girls all the time even when you had your girl, you’d still look at other chicks and we’d talk about them. ever since chaeyeon moved in next door you haven’t joined our conversations. you haven’t even glanced at another girl same goes for zico but that’s another story. for fucks sake, you spent more time with her than with heoyang. that relationship had fizzled long ago and we all knew it, it was just a matter of time. don’t tell me you felt anything towards her for the past couple of months because I know you didn’t. it was blatantly obvious that the relationship returned to its original purpose, just sex. I’m not going to try and pressure you into marrying chaeyeon or some shit, but I do think you should probably reanalyze your friendship with her. you’ve never had girl friends, dean you don’t form friendships with girls. haven’t you noticed? ask yourself why she’s not only your friend but dare I say best friend. you tell her more shit than you tell us anymore. why? if you really believe that there’s nothing underneath the surface, I’ll be the first to tell you that you’re stupid as fuck. I know you have those little thoughts about her. when she smiles you stare at her lips and you start smiling yourself without even realizing it. the weird part is, you’ve never…well, checked her out. you literally look at her in every way except sexually which is what throws me off but who knows. no shame in loving women and sex dude but you aren’t exactly the type of guy to skip out on looking at ass and tits. so why is chaeyeon different? let yourself fall dean, stop being so afraid man.”
god, I felt like he talked for fucking hours but every single word was floating around in my head. after he had left I began thinking about what he said and I have never felt so lost before. I never noticed half the shit he said. I realized that it was like we were both restraining from even allowing ourselves to acknowledge any type of feelings towards one another. I cherish chaeyeon and losing her is a legitimately terrifying thought. when best friends begin to get romantic it never ends well and that’s what stopped me more than anything else. I tried to convince myself that my feelings were originated from a broken place with heoyang and I but it wasn’t true. heoyang and I had been over long before the night of zico’s party. I hated how I was feeling. I have never been caught up on someone, not like this. don’t get me wrong, I did really love heoyang but this was so different and it scared me. but at the same time, I wanted to do as crush said and let things happen.
my train of thought soon drifted me into a slumber only to be woken up a few  hours later by a gust of wind being rushed out of me. my gasping for air woke chayeon up and the minute I looked at her, her eyebrows knit together with guilt.
“oh god, I’m so sorry. dean are you okay?” she rubbed my chest as I tried to regain a normal breathing pattern.
“fuck chaeyeon, when sochi said you kicked and hit I thought it was just reckless sleeping but you just punched me in the stomach”
“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” she sat up in bed and laid her hand over mine on my stomach. I pulled my hand away and extended my arm to the side.
“lay down”
CHAEYEON’S POV
I slowly laid back down, my head resting on his arm. I kept my hand against his stomach, gently rubbing it in circular motions. I felt so bad. first, I had bruised him up earlier and now I punched him in the stomach. what was next?
“I’m sorry”
“it’s fine stop apologizing, you just startled me, don’t worry. are you feeling better though?” he asked with a yawn following his question.
“yeah, I don’t think I’m completely sober but I feel a lot better. I can’t really remember what happened after I fell though. I just remember crying”
“you fell?!”
“yeah in the parking lot. I think zico picked me up” dean began twirling my hair between his fingers.
“you aren’t hurt though right?” I shook my head and he reached back into the infamous drawer.
“if you take some advil now you won’t feel as shitty in the morning and you’ll avoid the headache” he handed me a small red tablet and a water bottle. I sat up and swallowed the medication. dean’s arms immediately enveloped me and he dragged me back under the covers. my back pressed against his chest and his arm rested over my hip.
“is this okay or are you uncomfortable?” the fact that he was asking was beyond adorable. I placed my hand over his and glided my thumb over his knuckles.
“it’s fine”
silence filled the room and I closed my eyes, getting comfortable in his hold. he adjusted his chin upon my shoulder before sluggishly whispering in my ear.
“let’s do something tomorrow, just you and me. I can make you breakfast in a couple hours then we can go anywhere you want and we can have a nice dinner too”
the proximity of his lips to my ear made me shiver as I felt his words hitting the side of my neck. he noticed and pulled me closer into him. I swear I was sinking into him but his touch was so calming. I felt something I hadn’t felt in a while. I felt safe.
in that moment, I felt that it was just us. it was as if we were the only two people on earth. it was just us in bed, entangled in each other. I thought about zico’s words and how we were in this moment. “you don’t treat him like he’s your brother” he was right, I don’t. part of me wanted to just let things fall into place on their own and the other half just wanted to stay in this moment right here, exactly how we were already.
I stayed quiet for a moment and I could tell he began to get nervous.
“anywhere?” I felt a sleepy smile press against my neck and just that alone forced a simper on my own face.
“anywhere” he said.
“okay, deal” I mumbled before we both dozed off.
the next morning I woke up before him. zico caught me in the kitchen and we chatted a bit. I apologized for last night but I also talked to him about the little moment dean and I had at 4am last night.
“go for it. do it. you don’t have to date him right away. test the waters, go out have fun. why do you think he asked to spend the day with you? he probably made up his mind too. he’s letting things be. stop trying to well ,stop things from happening. he’s going with it so you should too. let yourself fall, he might just catch you”
“that was actually gross coming from you. I’ll think about it though” as zico was about to open his big ass mouth again, dean walked into the kitchen.
“think about what?” he asked as he rubbed his eyes.
“think about g-” I covered zico’s mouth with my palm, shoving him back.
“nothing! just g…going to the pier…today. yeah that” he glanced at me then back at zico, shrugging before going into the fridge. I shoved zico away and looked him in the eyes. say something and I’ll murder you with my own two hands. he got the message quickly, putting his hands up and backing away from me.
“what do you want for breakfast chae?” dean called.
“you” I head zico whisper.
“what did you say?” dean immediately looked up at zico, an amused half-smile crossed his lips. I was about 2 seconds away from tossing zico out the window.
“I said pancakes” zico looked at me, I was still slightly frozen but he knew those might be the last words he uttered. I nodded, reassuring him that I’d let this one slide, for now.  
I heard dean suppress a laugh as he walked up behind me, his fingers gently gripping my shoulders.
“are pancakes good? I’ll make them from scratch”
“that’s fine” I replied bluntly, my glare was still on zico, waiting for him to pull something out of his ass again.
“ignore him, he’s a dumbass” he said before pressing a kiss against my forehead and walking back to the fridge. zico raised his brows and so did I. it was unexpected. I knew my cheeks would flush soon and for once I didn’t try to stop it. zico had the stupidest smile on his lips as he walked into the living room. he may be a dumbass but he’s my brother…the dumbass.
I turned back, grabbing an assortment of fruits and chopping them up into a bowl. dean was so concentrated on cooking, he barely spoke. he looked so cute. when he concentrated, his tongue slipped out of his mouth a little and he bit his lip. I served two bowls of fruit and sat at the table, watching him try so hard to flip pancakes perfectly and laughing every time it splattered across the whole pan. just watching him made me happy. I could tell he was trying really hard to make this perfect and it was only breakfast.
“ok so they’re a little ugly but I promise they’re good!” he placed a plate with a stack of slightly overcooked pancakes before me. I chuckled, taking a few onto my plate and another three on his. we ate breakfast and discussed plans.
“after this we’ll go to the pier then we will have a nice dinner at one of the restaurants on the dock. so is it a date?” he said. the word date made my stomach tingle but god, this was such a cheesy idea. I didn’t want to be rude but this wasn’t exactly my idea of a good time. don’t get me wrong it’s cute and all but, not with him. he had always been someone I could be myself with and after thinking about what zico said, I decided to let things flow, but not if I had to act like I loved expensive ass food that would fill me up for 10 minutes. so I decided to stay true to myself and our friendship if this was really going to be a fair shot.
“no, it’s not” he stopped eating and looked worried. I could already tell that he was thinking I wasn’t up for our “date”. his expression made me laugh which only confused him more.
“dean, don’t you think we should do something more, I don’t know, us? I mean it’s cute and all but, we don’t really do that stuff. I say we go to the science museum downtown and be nerds, then we go have wings for dinner. I know it isn’t “cute” but…it’s us.” I pressed my lips together, looking down at my plate. I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye, exhaling semi-loud in relief. he kept his gaze on me for a minute before continuing his meal.
“okay, I heard they have the first nmr machine ever built. you’d probably like seeing stuff like that you nerd”
“what? really? what are we still doing here?! that machine is calling my name” he laughed at my stupid joke, pushing his plate aside.
“let’s go! go get ready and I’ll pick you up in an hour”
“pick me up? dean. I literally live 5 steps away from you”
“ok and? I can still pick you up, fuck” he reached over and ruffled my hair. I swatted his hands away, getting up and fighting back. it quickly turned into a playful fight. he grabbed a hold of my nose and I pulled his ear.
“y’all are gross” crush said as he walked in, not even looking at us. he looked like shit. he was probably second to most drunk last night since I took the main title. if it wasn’t for that advil at night I would probably be worse than him right now.
we stopped fighting and dean got up to flick his head. crush winced and before he could retaliate, dean grabbed my hand and ran off to his room, dragging me with him.
“you’re so mean you know his head probably hurts a lot” I said.
“yeah well he has a big head, it should be distributed well enough for it to not be that bad”
“you make no sense. dean shut up” he let himself fall onto the bed, pulling me with him. I landed on top of him and he caught me in his arms.
“make me” I swallowed noting but air like they do in the movies, realizing that it wasn’t an exaggeration when they do it. he stared at me, waiting for a response but I was frozen. I got myself together and got off him, collecting my things before heading to the door.
“I’ll text you in an hour” I forced an awkward smile and quickly left.
“chae-“
I closed the door behind me and almost ran out the front door. when I got home jisu was in the living room watching cartoons.
“woah, you look scared are you okay?”
“yeah I’m fine, just…” I debated whether or not I should tell her. this is something I would tell sochi but I was still a little mad that she initiated this. I bit my lip in thought before dropping my things and taking a seat next to jisu. she sat up and muted the tv.
“I think dean wanted to kiss me. that’s weird right? oh well okay actually I should tell you that I’m going to give it a shot with him. I’ll let things flow like zico said. I think he’s doing the same but no one has really said anything so it’s kind of awkward but right now I told him to shut up and he said “make me” like they do in movies and I swear he wanted to kiss me. maybe I’m being extra and he didn’t. I don’t know but for some reason I got really shy and you know I’m not shy with anyone in general. I don’t know it’s weird right? or am I weird for thinking that?”
she opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. I raised my brows suggestively.
“so? are you gonna say anything?” I asked.
“what the fuck just came out of your mouth, you talked so fast I understood like two words”
I groaned and let myself fall back against the couch.
“ok ok it isn’t weird. doesn’t a kiss tell you if you really like someone or not? I don’t know much about relationships you know that. but if you don’t feel like you’re ready to kiss then don’t. be old fashioned grandma, no one’s judging”
“ok A) you are judging by calling me grandma. B) fuck off this is different. I hook up with guys all the time but this isn’t a guy. this is ugly ass noodle head dean. I don’t know why I got shy, it’s not like I don’t know him. even with hook up’s, there isn’t much kissing, haha”
“you’re nasty. take your time before you suck faces if that’s what you want”
“you couldn’t have said kiss instead? ugh, wait. why aren’t you surprised that I’m going to date dean?”
“because everyone knew it was going to happen soon and because you just said it, meaning you do plan on dating him which also means I win $150 when you do as long as it’s before winter break”
“what the fuck, did you bet? with who?!”
“nayeon, christian, sochi, zico, and crush…so everyone. we all agreed that y’all had feelings for each other but crush thought he was going to dump that bitch for you, sochi and zico thought you were going to date sometime next year, nayeon and christian said it wouldn’t happen because you both care too much about your friendship and I said before the semester ends. be a good friend and get me money” I grabbed a pillow from the couch and smacked her with it.
“I hate all of you, I’m going to go get ready to date him in 3 years so none of you fake asses benefit from it” I got up and went upstairs.
“so…is that a yes?” I heard her say behind me. I ignored her and went to my room. I took a shower and got ready. I slipped on a jean skirt that laid above my knees along with a white t shirt tucked into it. I took a little longer than usual to get ready but my makeup looked so good I had no regrets of making him wait longer.
Dean: ready?
Me: yeah, come “pick me up” babe 😩😩😔✊
I laughed at my own text, thinking about how the fuck we would ever be able to function as a couple. why was I thinking about us being a couple??
Dean: on my way now 😉
Dean: here
the consecutive messages made me chuckle. he was so stupid but it was so cute. I rushed downstairs and the moment I opened the door he was standing there with a small bag in his hand.
“you look cute, ready?” I ignored his comment and pointed at the bag.
“what’s that?” I asked.
“oh yeah,” he handed me the bag with tissue paper sticking out. “I asked zico to pick this up for me last night but I didn’t get the chance to give it you”
I pulled away the tissue and grabbed the item inside. it was a small box.
“dean, you didn’t have to get me anyth-“
“open it” he interrupted. his smile showed how proud he was of whatever was inside.
I opened the box to reveal a silver necklace with the molecular structure of dopamine at the heart of it. it was so beautiful and thoughtful. I swung my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.
“I’m guessing you like it? let me put it on you” he gently pushed me off and took the necklace from my hand, turning me around and pushing my hair to the side. I lifted it up for him and he slipped the necklace around my neck. I turned back around and held onto the pendant laying on my neck.
“dean you really shouldn’t have”
“I wanted to,” he stepped closer to me, taking the pendant between his fingers. “do you know why I got it?” he asked.
“because you’re stupid” I replied. he smiled and shook his head.
“because you make me happy, so I wanted to give you happiness as well” in that moment I felt my heart speed up. i slipped my arms around him, my chest pressing against his, making sure he knew that it was beating like that because of him. his arms slid around my waist and he pulled me close, burying his head in my neck.
“thank you, I love it” I said.
“good” he replied, pressing a kiss against my cheek. my lips curled into a simper and I caught his hand in mine as he retracted from the hug.
“let’s go” he locked our fingers together and I swear I heard someone squeal followed by an “ow” but I didn’t really pay attention.  
the whole ride downtown he refused to let go of my hand despite me telling him that it was sweaty and gross. I didn’t feel awkward or weird. it felt normal. it felt right.
after an hour of walking around the museum, pointing out things we found interesting and even some stuff we had either used or learned about in class, we headed out the door. I bumped into someone on the sidewalk, or more like she bumped into me, she almost knocked me over. thankfully dean was still holding my hand and he caught me before my face met the pavement.
“are you okay chae-“ his face went blank instantaneously. it looked like he had seen a ghost.
“dean?” I traced his eyes and…fuck.
“so that’s why you didn’t call back yesterday…” she said.
I looked at dean and he was speechless. yesterday?
“what? your new toy doesn’t know that we hooked up every day last week?”
“shut up” he spat through gritted teeth. I felt numb, I didn’t know how to feel nor respond.
“hah, you should probably get over your ex properly before getting a new one” she said. her tone was cocky and it made me angry.
“get the fuck away from us heoyang” dean uttered. she took a step closer to me and dean tried to push me behind him but instead I pushed him away. she came closer and closer, before I knew it, all I saw was red.
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