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theriu · 1 day

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How To Bargain With Rumplestilts

Rumplestilt: I will help you out of your predicament, but for a price: your firstborn child!

Me: Right, so you’ll help me in exchange for your firstborn child. Deal!

Rumplestilt: (accepts handshake, cackling) The bargain is set! There’s no backing out n . . . hngh! Wait, what’s . . . happening . . .?

(Rumplestilt falls to the floor, twitching and glowing. Glow fades to reveal a small bundle next to him)

Me and Rumplestilt: . . . . . .

(Bundle starts crying)

Me: Dude . . . did you just have a baby?

Rumplestilt: No, that can’t be . . . my kind can’t have kids! Why do you think we bargain for children?!

Me: Well, we did agree you would help me in exchange for YOUR firstborn child . . . I think we may have found a loophole?

Rumplestilt: (awed) Did you know this would happen?!

Me: Honestly I was just trying to be clever, this is way better than anything I expected.

Rumplestilt: (teary-eyed) I’m a dad!

Me: Congratulations!!!

Me: Oh shoot, but don’t forget about the bargain! The kid might disappear or something!

Rumplestilt: (clutches bundle) Oh my word, right!!!

———

(A/N: It’s been a while since I messed with magical bargain tropes. XD Fun Fact: I learned while fiddling with this idea that a “rumplestilt” is, in fact, a name for a type of goblin! Which is great because I try to keep my guides species-focused and I did goblins in my very first one!)

For more assorted nonsense, visit my How To Guides for Mythical Creatures Masterlist!

#how to guides for mythical creatures #rumplestiltskin #rumplestilt #goblins #fae bargains #fae #mythology #cryptids #monsters #humor

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dinneratgrannys · 2 days

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ONCE UPON A TIME 6.09, Changelings

#ouatedit #onceuponatimeedit #rumplestiltskinedit #goldenqueenedit #ouat #once upon a time #rumplestiltskin #golden queen #s6 #6x09 changelings #character: rumplestiltskin #dynamic: golden queen #event: rewatch 22

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eevylynn · 2 days

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While I work on my previous winner (Nimona in Disney trad style), I figured I'd have this poll going for the next round.

I'm trying out different drawing styles to challenge myself.

And I'll add the second poll with styles when I reblog this, so be sure to check the notes for the 2nd poll!

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eternalfurtive · 2 days

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happy birthday to this beautiful man <3

better quality over at tiktok

#once upon a time #rumplestiltskin #rumbelle #robert carlyle #robert carlyle edit #bobby carlyle

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aenslem · 6 hours

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Oh, and point of interest – the driver? He saw me throwing some magic.

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hjbirthdaywishes · 3 days

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April 14, 2024

Happy 63 Birthday to Robert Carlyle.

#Robert Carlyle #Happy Birthday #Mr Gold #Rumplestiltskin #Rumple #The Dark One #Beast #Crocodile #Detective Weaver #Weaver #Once Upon a Time #OUaT #April #2024

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depressedstressedlemonzest · 1 day

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😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I hate hate HATE how belle went to zelena ZELENA of all people for help.

THE WOMAN WHO ABUSED YOUR HUSBAND

WTF BELLE

Call me what you want, but it comes from love.

I said it before and I'll say it again. Fuck you zelena.

AGAIN WHAT THE FUCK BELLE

Love henry such a smart fucking kid.

Get away from our son!

It'd been cool if emma and regina got together and had a like polycule thing/poly thing with hook and Robin.

They're so nervous watching him, but he's got it.

At first I thought he meant rumple grandpa but it's probably david grandpa.

"Henry violet might be a nice girl but she's a commoner she's lucky to have a prince like you."

Subtle.

Real subtle.

This just pissed me off.

This and her not letting rumple at the birth. Like BELLE he loves you both so much. He'll get his head out of his ass.

At least Skype him for the birth.

#lem watches ouat #rumbelle #ouat belle #belle gold #mr. gold #ouat rumple #rumplestiltskin #henry mills #regina mills #evil queen #emma swan #ouat #once upon a time #fucking zelena

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oautincorrectquotes · 5 months

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Belle: I can't believe you assassinated the King!

Rumple: Well, 'assassinated' implies it was politically motivated. I killed him because he was a dick, so technically I murdered him

Belle: That's not better!

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lamour-est-la-force · 7 months

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Me: Once Upon a Time season 1 is so cozy and comforting :)

ouat s1: government corruption, a woman almost having to give her baby away against her will, a mine collapsing with a child inside, a girl locked in a mental hospital, arson, homeless children needing to steal to survive, said homeless children almost getting separated in the foster care system, infidelity, drugging and kidnapping, attempted muder, actual murder, a murder trial that has nothing to do with the real actual murder, a man slowly and painfully turning into wood, etc.

#it’s the walkable small town vibes #once upon a time #ouat #ouat s1 #once upon a time season 1 #emma swan #henry mills #regina mills #august booth #belle french #Jefferson ouat #rumplestiltskin #rumplestiltskin ouat #mary margaret blanchard #david nolan #Snow White ouat #prince charming ouat

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agirlwithoutmagic · 7 months

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sorry but I cannot help but love ouat belle so much. she’s a hero she’s a scholar she’s the key to ending the ogre wars she was locked in a psychiatric ward for 28 years and didn’t age a day she reads mandarin and elvish she’s inexplicably australian and most of all she fucked that old man.

#belle french #ouat #once upon a time #rumplestiltskin #ouat rumple #rumbelle #she said “I can fix him” and she FAILED! over and over again! i desire her carnally #edited because i remembered regina kept her in the DUNGEON(equivalent) for 28 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!#chelsea.txt

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queenofglassbeliever · 4 months

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Watching the PJO show as a book fan, like: