Dirty Little Secret - Part 1: Qatar // CL16

Pairing: Charles Leclerc / Original Female Character

Series Summary: Charles' wife went to The Other Side and came back, but her past did too.

Chapter Summary: Qatar's high temperatures prove to be deadly when a terrible crash happens on the track.

Series Warnings: Death, descriptions of CPR and a car crash, sexual comments and implied sexual acts, mentions of blood, mentions of suicide and depression.

Author’s Note: This is a special I decided to write inspired by Halloween and the Qatar GP, it's five parts long. It's the first time I write something for this page instead of editing thing I have written before, I hope you guys like it. Rate: +16 (descriptions of medical procedures).

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The first memory Charles had of his wife is from a rainy day twenty years ago. He was getting ready to jump into his kart when he saw her, red hair blowing in the air, a lilac helmet under her arm and a matching race suit, with her name, Y/N, embroidered in black cursive letters. She was the prettiest girl in the world, he was sure, so sure that he told his father that he was marrying that girl when he was older. But that pretty redhead was not seen again for many years. He kind of forgot about her and that smile that missed a few tooth, the memory of her appearing once in a while, triggered by the combination of red and lilac. They crossed paths again when they were fifteen but the relationship they developed was anything but amicable. Charles spotted her instantly, her hair exactly the same as he remembered it, but what he also noticed was that she was hanging from Max Verstappen's arm. They were laughing and talking excitedly as Max explained something to her. He could feel his blood boiling inside his veins, now that he finally saw her again she had to be around his most hated rival. He tried to approach her once he found her alone but the second she saw him she walked away, right back to Max, who put a protective arm around her shoulders and sent Charles a dirty look.

It took a few years for Charles and Y/N to get along and then just months to start dating. Charles learned that Max and Y/N were best friends since she moved from her home country to Netherlands. She lived in Monaco for a few months in between that, that's when they first met, and then her family settled in Roosteren, a town in Netherlands bordering with Maaseik (Belgium) where Max grew up. They went together to school and karting, becoming close pretty quickly. That's why she initially didn't like Charles, his rivalry with Max was so strong that she even disliked Charles. But with time his relationship with Max evolved into mutual respect and Charles and Y/N started getting to know each other better. When they were twenty, Charles made a bet with her: if he got to win the F2 Championship, she had to go on a date with him. She said yes and after he won they went to the first of many incredible dates they had together. Max took the relationship way better than Charles expected and he even gave them a gift for their first anniversary. Both Charles and Y/N gave everything to the relationship and Charles was elated with that, he loved how committed she was from day one. He felt like they were perfect for each other, a match made in Heaven. Being that close made it difficult for Charles when Y/N would spend so much time with Max, but he understood that they were best friends and needed some time for themselves.

After almost six years of dating, Charles and Y/N got married. It was a little celebration with their families and closest friends. It was also Y/N rookie year in F1, driving for Aston Martin along Fernando Alonso, with a contract until 2026. Everyone was happy, they were glowing and already planning for a year off together to have children when her contract was over. They married during summer break and moved their honeymoon to the off-season because Max and Y/N had their annual trip to Netherlands together right after the wedding. One thing Charles noticed was that Max and Y/N always went together back home on summer break and whenever he suggested they changed the date, both refused instantly. The trip wasn't long, it was just four days and they stayed at Y/N's childhood house. Charles never went with them, he suspected that the trip was more than just wanting to visit a childhood friend, but he could see that the topic was kind of delicate to them. He asked once about it and Y/N showed such hurt about it that he regretted asking. "We always go back to visit a friend of ours, it's complicated". He got that answer on their second year dating and was never told anything else about it. He never dared to ask Max and by the gloom mood the Dutch always wore for the trip, Charles knew better than to pry. It was something that Charles really wanted to know about since it seemed to affect Y/N pretty bad. Each time she came back extremely depressed and quiet. The last one hadn't been different, still, she recovered and went back to racing, winning two races in a row. Now, it was time for Qatar.

The heat was unbearable, Charles could feel it sweeping through his seat and into his suit, and that shouldn't happen. Lewis and Fernando had just been denied their petition to cancel, the two older drivers having taken the matter into their own hands to protect the younger ones. Max had talked to Christian to see if they could do something with Red Bull as a team. Nothing worked, the FIA wanted the race to happen so it was going to happen. They were all exhausted from the sprint the day before and they all felt terrible. Y/N looked down, she didn't do well with heat. Charles walked to her and sat by her side, taking her hand and kissing her knuckles gently.

"How are you holding up, Bunny?". He asked once he was sitting next to her on the floor, as everyone waited for the order to go to their cars. "Bunny" was a nickname that everyone had for her, she was a Loony-Tunes fan and had a lot of merchandising of it: mugs, shirts, hats, bags, you name it, she had it. Charles usually watched it with her, Bugs Bunny was her favourite.

"I think my teeth are sweating". She was frowning with annoyance, but that was quickly replaced with a giggle when she heard Charles laugh at her comment. They kept laughing softly, avoiding looking at each other, knowing that the cameras were following their interaction. She didn't like public displays of affection, not even with Charles, it made her uncomfortable to have her relationship analyzed all the time, so she just agreed to some light kissing and quick hugs. With her friends it was also a no, a lot of rumors circulated all the time, with almost every driver, even with her teammate, old enough to be her father, who she called her "racing dad". Fernando was the best teammate a rookie could have, he was experienced and patient, he took the time to explain things to her and guide her through everything that the racing world threw at her. They were really close, she was the kid he never had.

"Bunny, I tried, but they won't cancel". Fernando stood in front of them, an apologetic look on his face.

"I'm sure you did, Dad, don't worry". Next to him was Lewis, fumming,

"We should refuse to race. All of us together". The seven-time champion was an expert on getting people to work together for shared goals, and he was fearless when it came to things being unfair.

"Some of us could loose our seats for that, Lew". She knew that even if the four of them were safe, other drivers weren't that lucky. Most of the contracts said that they couldn't refuse to race, not without the green light from their Team Principal, and they were directly commanded to race.

"I know...". Lewis bit his lip, trying to contain his anger. "It's just so unfair". He shook his head when he heard the call for them to go to the cars. Y/N took Fernando's hand and got up. Charles gave his wife a hug and a quick kiss before parting to his car and hear her say her last bit to the conversation.

"Sadly, I think not even a tragedy can make them prioritize our lives over the money".

It was a 57-laps race. Charles and Y/N had their radios connected all the time, they couldn't talk to each other, but it gave them some peace of mind to hear the other's voice through the race. Everyone was complaining about the heat. Esteban threw up inside his helmet, Logan had to retire and Fernando asked to be drenched in cold water, something that was definitely not happening but God... he wanted it to. Charles felt like he was dying, his head hurt, it was hard to breath and the sand on the track made the car difficult to control, much more strength needed to keep the car on the track. It was lap 38 and he already wanted it to end, the first time in his life that he hated his job. He could hear that Y/N was complaining a lot, her voice tired and annoyed on the radio. She was uncomfortable on her seat, she had cramps on her hands and legs due to dehydration and her head was pounding non-stop. Still, she didn't feel like retiring and she made it clear. He could see her car moving around the track in front of him. She was P3, Max P4 and he was P5, with a prominent gap of almost 4 seconds to Max.

"Max is not doing well. He will retire this lap". Charles heard Xavi, his race engineer, on the radio and then heard his wife talking again, probably after getting the news about Max herself from her own radio.

"This conditions are inhuman". She sounded angrier than before, she was probably worried about her friend. "I can't believe they didn't cancel, I can't beli-". The radio transmission was cut short as Max's car collided with hers. Charles saw the whole accident happen in front of him, even having to drive out of the track himself because of it. They were all on turn 4, she turned, Max didn't. He didn't even break, his front wing impacting the right side of her car and pushing her against the wall of the track in a T-shaped crash. Everything happened so fast Charles was having trouble processing the information. Xavi kept asking him if he was alright, but he was already getting out of the car. He wanted to run, to fly even, to get to her as fast as he could, but his legs weren't as fast as he wanted them to be. Max wasn't moving, unconscious in the cockpit. He could see Y/N moving and climbing out of her car, walking towards Max like she was drunk, her feet unsteady and her arms moving strangely. She seemed like a mix of tired and dizzy. He kept running but felt like he wasn't getting closer. He never noticed how much physical distance 4-seconds gaps actually were. He saw his wife doing what she could to get Max out of his car, a fire burning tall were their cars connected, close to Max's cockpit. She was walking backwards, Max's body limp against hers and she was using all of her strength to carry him away from the fire. Charles was a few meters away when she suddenly shook, a little yelp coming from her then falling to the sandy ground with a muffed thud, Max atop of her.

"Bunny! Max!". Charles screamed as he ran towards them. He kneeled next to the pair and quickly removed Max from his wife. The Dutchman was breathing softly, his chest barely raising with each little breath. Y/N, on the other side, was still, too still. He removed her helmet and balaclava and the first thing he saw were her eyes slightly open and unfocussed. Panic spread through his body when he couldn't find her pulse on her neck and no air seemed to come out of her, nor come in, her chest not moving at all. He removed his own head protection as fast as he could and opened her suit to move her clothes out of the way to start CPR compressions. "Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix". Charles counted, the sweat from the heat and the strength the CPR took mixing with his tears. "Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, vingt". One more set and he had to do two ventilations. He decided to focus on his task, even if a thousand thoughts went through his head. "Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, trente". He moved her head up and pinched her nose with that hand, pulling softly at her chin with the other to open her mouth, covering it with his own as he exhaled into her. Twice. He could only cry and plead as he moved away from her, to start the compressions again. "Please, mon amour, please don't leave me". He placed his hands on her chest again. "I love you too much, please stay with me". The pain inside his chest made it impossible for him to notice the heat anymore. He needed her back, he couldn't loose her. "Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix".

"Charles, you're gonna finish the set of compressions and then we're gonna take it from there, do you understand?". He never noticed when, but the paramedics made it there. As he nodded his head and kept working, he saw how some medics got Max on a stretcher and gave him oxygen.

"Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, trente". He was pulled away from Y/N when he made it to thirty. His first instinct told him to fight, to crawl back to his wife and never leave her side, but the arms that pulled him away were giving everything they had to keep him there. It didn't matter how much he cried or fought. The doctor cut her fireproofs open and placed the pads of the defibrillator on her chest. He could hear the machine talking, explaining that there was no pulse. "No! No! No!". He repeated as he kept fighting the marshal holding him down. Another medic was ventilating her with a bag valve mask. The machine told them to clear and everyone pulled away from her. Her body went stiff and then relaxed. The machine made more sounds and Charles felt like everything was taking too much time for his liking. Swiftly, Y/N was moved to a stretcher and took into the ambulance that just then Charles seemed to acknowledge. The last time he could see his wife, the machine was saying something but he was unable to hear as he was pulled away towards the safety car that had to take him to the garage, the ambulance taking off and disappearing from his sight.

He can't remember how he made it to the hospital, but the next thing after the safety car, he's sitting in a room, an IV connected to his arm and Joris rubbing his back. He could see thought the little window of the door that Arthur, his younger brother, was outside with Lorenzo, his older brother. The other two Leclercs were arguing and Charles could only worry as he felt his body too relaxed but his head racing. A doctor walked towards his brothers and after talking for a few moments, the three of them walked in. The doctor stood in front of him.

"Mr. Leclerc, your wife is stable now". She said with a small smile. Charles could feel the wet pattern of his tears on his cheeks. "She had a concussion. A big one, and between the dehydration and the effort of carrying Mr. Verstappen out of the car, her heart gave up and she had a heart-attack". Charles nodded. "You save her life. Her heart stopped working and the CPR you did on her kept her brain oxygenated enough time for us to start her heart back on. She's alive because of you".

"Can I see her?". He felt his throat dry and stiff as his hoarse voice came out in a whisper. The doctor nodded her head and helped Charles up.

"Yes, you can". She walked him through the hospital with his IV still connected, to help him recover from his own dehydration. Joris took the pole with his IV bag and carried it. "She's asleep now and we're getting her strong again with a supplement we're giving her through her IV". The doctor explained while they walked. "She has to stay for observation for 24hrs and then, if her MRIs are alright, you'll be able to go home". He nodded and took a deep breath when they stopped at the door of his wife's room. Then, anxious about what was waiting for him at the other side of that door, he pushed down the handle and walked in. He sat next to his wife and held her hand, kissing it softly. She moved a bit, stirring, and with her eyes still closed she called out:

"Maud?"

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This is the first part! Enjoy.

In my privilege, I had always assumed that the refugee process was a troubled but essential part of giving equity to human life. Even now, I don’t know enough to speak on it really. But you know what I feel? There’s a troubling aggrandizement to believing we can heal the damage we have wrought dividing our borders and waging imperialism. As an American, I am still a privileged benefactor of this system. African American or not. And though I am thankful for an education that did not close me off to the delicacies of other cultures, I wonder who I’d be now if I had not seen firsthand, as a foreigner, what it means to seek refuge in a foreign country.

Shayla Lawson, "On Privilege (Roosteren, Netherlands)" from How to Live Free in a Dangerous World: A Decolonial Memoir

“Driving the length of the restored river – which runs from Maastricht to Roosteren – is like being in a time capsule. Some of the older sections of the project, further upstream, are already thronging with life. Borgharen, an area which has been farmed since at least Roman times, was one of the first sites to be let go. Dozens of sand martens are speeding into the cliff by the river to feed their chicks; there are blackcaps, stonechats, skylarks and swallows in the sky.”

HOE VAAK DOE JIJ IN DE WEEK AAN ZELF LIEFDE?

WAT IS ZELF LIEFDE? IK NOEM HET ME TIME.

IK PROBEER ELKE DAG ME TIME IN DE AGENDA IN TE ROOSTEREN.

How to Live Free in a Dangerous World: A Decolonial Memoir By Shayla Lawson

While traveling through France I took along Shayla Lawson's How to Live Free in a Dangerous World to read to get me in proper "other places" mood, and it did not disappoint. A section that should have been about getting married, relocating, and acclimating to the small town life of Roosteren, Netherlands, and all that entails, instead becomes a wrenching rumination on African refugees in Dutch asylum centers. A recollection of a Butoh performance in Osaka sends Lawson into deep reflection on the nature of performance (rather than this particular performance) and the kind of spiritual intimacy it all reminds Lawson of.

Jumping off the book in a snow storm on the way to a Prince performance at the First Avenue club in Minneapolis, circa 1983, from the belly of Lawson's mother's womb endeared me to this work from the jump.

Nieuwjaarsbijeenkomst natuurbegraafplaats Schapenmeer

Afgelopen zaterdag vond op natuurbegraafplaats Schapenmeer een goed bezochte nieuwjaarsontmoeting plaats. Midden in het bos bij de boskapel van de natuurbegraafplaats konden belangstellenden, nabestaanden en betrokkenen elkaar ontmoeten. De koffie en warme chocolademelk stonden klaar om een ieder te verwarmen. Kinderen konden bij een vuurtje marshmallows roosteren. “Als team voelen we ons sterk…

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waar wordt tahin van gemaakt

waar wordt tahin van gemaakt Tahini is een pasta die wordt gemaakt van geroosterde sesamzaadjes. Het productieproces van tahini begint met het roosteren van de sesamzaadjes. Deze roosterstap is essentieel omdat het de smaak van de zaadjes verdiept en hun oliën activeert. Na het roosteren worden de sesamzaadjes gemalen tot een pasta zonder verdere toevoegingen, zoals olie of andere ingrediënten.…

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Prijs: 760 Per Maand omschrijving ... #Appartement #Appartement #Limburg #Roosteren https://actuelekamers.nl/appartement-tehuur-roosteren-760-eur/?feed_id=59026&_unique_id=64f6e2200f8b0

Alphen aan de Rijn - Na een succesvolle eerste editie staat De Buurtcamping komende zomer opnieuw in Alphen aan de Rijn. In het weekend van 7 t/m 9 juli kunnen buurtbewoners hun tentje opzetten in het eigen Weteringpark. Door samen een weekend gezellig te kamperen en mee te doen aan leuke activiteiten, leer je je buurtgenoten beter kennen. Hoe meer buren er komen, des te gezelliger het is. Na afloop van deze mini-vakantie hoef je geen afscheid te nemen van je nieuwe vakantievrienden. Die kom je in het vervolg gewoon weer tegen in je eigen buurt! Wat is de Buurtcamping? Tijdens De Buurtcamping wordt het park bij jou in de buurt omgetoverd tot een gezellige camping. De camping wordt bewoond door alle mensen die de buurt rijk is: van muurbloempjes tot druktemakers en van de allerkleinsten tot senioren. Net zoals op een normale camping ben je op de Buurtcamping veel buiten en is iedereen gelijk. Met een wc-rol onder je arm naar het toilet, samen de afwas doen met de buurman en even tandpasta lenen van de buurvrouw. Door samen de camping op te bouwen of mee te doen aan een van de activiteiten, leren buurtbewoners elkaar tijdens de Buurtcamping beter kennen. Een derde van de kampeerplekken is gereserveerd voor minima. Zo wordt ervoor gezorgd dat iedereen kan genieten van de Buurtcamping. Kom ook kamperen in het Weteringpark van Alphen aan den RIjn! Geef je zomervakantie de gezelligste start dicht bij huis op De Buurtcamping! Lekker luieren in een hangmat met een boekje erbij? Dat kan! Maar ook voor de actieve of culturele vakantieganger is er genoeg te doen. Buurtbewoners mogen namelijk zelf bepalen hoe het programma er uitziet. Marshmallows roosteren, bingo, een sportieve workshop, een spellentoernooi, een kook- of barbecue-workshop... er valt van alles te bedenken. Misschien wil je zelf een leuke activiteit of workshop organiseren op de camping. Ideeën voor een activiteit die op De Buurtcamping zeker niet mag ontbreken, kunnen gemaild worden naar [email protected]. Met kamperen ervaar je het echte campinggevoel, maar overnachten is niet verplicht. Voor wie kamperen nog een brug te ver is, maar wel graag wil meedoen met de activiteiten overdag is er een dagpas of weekendpas verkrijgbaar. Bestel je kaartjes via: buurtcampingalphen.nl. Aanmelden als vrijwilliger?  Een Buurtcamping organiseer je natuurlijk niet alleen, maar met een team van mede-buurtbewoners en met professionele hulp van de landelijke stichting 'De Buurt'. Het lokale team in Alphen aan de Rijn heeft de organisatie al op poten gezet, maar we kunnen jouw hulp zeker gebruiken! Het lokale team bestaat op dit moment uit 3 mensen. Graag willen zij het team uitbreiden met 1 of 2 extra teamleden. Zij zijn specifiek op zoek naar een vrijwilligerscoördinator en iemand binnen het communicatieteam die gemakkelijk contacten legt met lokale organisaties, buurtverenigingen en lokale ondernemingen om samenwerkingen in gang te zetten. Daarnaast hebben we verschillende soorten vrijwilligers op de camping zelf nodig die willen helpen met op- en afbouwen, schoonmaken, receptie, social media, activiteitenbegeleiding, coördineren van het programma, omroepen etc.. Er is altijd wel een taak die bij jou past!

Lola

NHD 6 mei 2023 

“Als de kinderen gelukkig zijn, ben ik ook gelukkig” denk ik dat ze zegt. 

Lola houdt bij wijze van proost haar glas rosé wat wankelend naar mij op.

Ik bivakeer met B. op een hippiecamping deze week. En Lola staat toevallig naast mij met haar twee kinderen. 

Lola is een opvallende figuur. Ik weet niet hoe ze het doet, maar elke dag stapt ze in de meest fantastische outfits uit haar tentje. Een strak donkergrijs tuinpak met kort tijgerprint t-shirtje eronder. De rode string die tevoorschijn kwam, toen ze zich bukte om een marshmallow te roosteren maakte dat ik nooit meer hetzelfde naar campingkleding kijk. 

Ik scan mezelf even. Oude zwarte spijkerbroek, zwarte hoodie, vaalroze regenlaarzen. Kamperen betekent vuurtjes, rook, modder, stof, dus je oudste kleding mee. Heb ik daar even flink de haring mis geslagen. 

We spreken elkaar nauwelijks, behalve dan bij de schaarse ‘proostmomentjes,’ op afstand elke avond bij de vuurkorf. Als ik Lola overdag tegenkom lijkt ze me niet te herkennen. 

“Buuf!” zegt-schreeuwt ze. “Ik zeg altijd zo, als de kinderen maar blij zijn, ben ik ook blij! Proost!” roept ze weer. Het lijkt haar mantra. Ik proost halfslachtig terug. 

Witte cowboylaarzen met zilveren studs vandaag, strakke panterlegging, zwarte blouse met grote turquoise bloemen en een lichtbruine suède jas, met van die sliertjes aan de mouwen. Een eenmans partytent, zegt iemand bij de vuurkorf als Lola niet oplet, en dat klopt wel zo ongeveer. 

B. doet mee met de kindertalentenjacht dus ik sta al een uurtje bij het campingrestaurant naar vals kindergezang te luisteren. Ook de kinderen van Lola doen mee, maar Lola zelf is nergens te bekennen. 

Na de talentenjacht staat er ineens een betoverende verschijning op het podium, in een prachtig sierlijke witte jurk en een ketting met enorme stenen. Ik herken de puntjes van de witte cowboylaarzen die onder de jurk uit piepen. Lola zucht in de microfoon en lijkt nog meer aangeschoten. 

Er start een geluidsband. Ze ademt diep in en pakt een vodje uit haar bh waar een handgeschreven tekst op staat. Na het lied, waar iedereen doorheen praat, zegt ze zachtjes in de microfoon: “hier moest ik even doorheen”. 

De mens achter de modieuze verschijning heeft zonet iets proberen over te brengen, iets wat haar aangaat en raakt, en niemand heeft het gezien. Een week lang zag ik haar zichzelf overschreeuwen en als ze dan fluistert, luistert er niemand. 

Ik hef mijn glas richting Lola. Dat je maar snel iemand vindt die je echt hoort.

Dirty Little Secret - Part 4: Forgiveness // CL16

Pairing: Charles Leclerc / Original Female Character

Series Summary: Charles' wife went to The Other Side and came back, but her past did too.

Chapter Summary: Charles follows his wife and Max to the woods in Roosteren, where they wish to finally find Maud.

Series Warnings: Death, descriptions of CPR and a car crash, sexual comments and implied sexual acts, mentions of blood, mentions of suicide and depression.

Author’s Note: This is a special I decided to write inspired by Halloween and the Qatar GP, it's five parts long. It's the first time I write something for this page instead of editing thing I have written before, I hope you guys like it. Rate: +16 (descriptions of medical procedures).

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"No, this is nuts". Max said, shaking his head furiously. "We're not going, we promised it was the last time!"

"Don't you get it?! She's asking for out help!". Y/N yelled back at Max moving her hands around to bring more emphasis into her comment. Charles was just sitting on the couch, trying to process everything. His wife had just told him that she spent a decade traveling back home with her best friend to camp in the woods and look for the body of a childhood friend. And now she wanted to do it again because she had been seeing... The ghost of that friend? Was that what she said? The ghost?... what the actual fuck. He couldn't help but prefer the option of her cheating on him with Max, is sounded less crazy. "We gave up, Max! We gave up on her and now she wants us to keep looking! We know that she's there, everyone used to go there. If something happened, she obviously ran there! We just need to keep looking".

"You're hallucinating, Y/N! You're probably suffering from late brain damage!". Max was just about to explode and Charles could see it. "We need to take you to the doctor! You're not making any sense. You know that going back madness".

"Charles believes me!". She defended, and her husband snapped his head towards her with an almost neck-breaking force, his eyes wide open. "Don't you, babe?"

"Uhmm...". His silence and hesitation were divorce-worthy, he could see the pain in his wife's eyes and he didn't have the heart to call her crazy. "Yeah, uhmm, of course". Max pulled off his own hair, exasperatedly. "I believe you, mon amour".

"For fuck's sake, Leclerc! You're such a-". Max cut himself off before he could say something actually offensive. "She's hurt, Charles. And even if she wasn't, I can't go and help her!". He then added a lot calmer and pointed at his legs, still weak from the accident.

"I'll go with you and help you search". Charles knew that it was a terrible idea, but he had already said that he believed Y/N and he couldn't back down. Together in sickness and health, right?

"It's too dangerous. It took us our whole lives to get to know our way through there enough for us to be safe". Max shook his head. "We're not taking you there, Charles".

"I'm not a kid, Max". Charles retorted offended. "I can go with you and be careful, you two have been walking around those woods since you were teenagers. I can do it as an adult".

"I know that we agreed on stopping". Y/N said sounding a lot more like her old self. "I know that we said we'd stop because it hurts you, because you need to move on, Max". Max was crying again. He couldn't do this all over again. He needed to stop. "But you know I'm not hallucinating. You know that what I see is real. She's calling me back there. She's calling US, Max, and we need to answer ".

There were perks in Max owning a private jet, one of those was flying from one place to the other without bringing too much attention to themselves. Max had even learned how to fly it and had his license that allowed him to go wherever he wanted. However, Max choose to get a pilot this time, there was a lot of planning they needed to do and they couldn't risk it getting recorded on the black box. It was ilegal to camp on those woods, it wasn't the first time that someone had disappeared on Roosteren and the police didn't want the kids of the town lurking around in the dark. Max and Y/N paid a large amount of money to bribe the Chief of Police each year and make him look the other way. They were probably paying doble to bring Charles in with them, but they didn't care, they'd spend the money they had to. The plan was simple, yet, it required their absolute focus on each part to secure a win. Woods are usually just plants, insects and the lonely furry predator you can find, they had guns for that, still, these woods weren't normal woods, they had a certain... effect, on people, that's why Max and Y/N went for just four days and on summer break, there was something different on summer, something less dark around, as the days were longer and the nights shorter. Still, nighttime kept as terrifying as the rest of the seasons, they both had tested their limits over the years, how much they could endure, how much they could take before breaking. Four nights, that was their limit, and that wasn't a big help to their search, five days and four nights are not enough to look for someone, it's too little time to cover so much land. Nights were off the table when it came to searching, the nights were reserved to survival and survival only, the main point of them was making it to the next morning.

"You need to follow every order we give you, no matter what, Charles. This is important". Max told him, the deep tone and the frown on his face showing how serious he was. "Specially at night".

"You can't trust yourself out there at night". Y/N added.

"What's so bad about the nights?". Charles was starting to ask himself how come he could have been so in the dark about so many things for years.

"Those woods... They do things to you". Max looked at his lap, as if the mere memory of what place did to him was too much to bear with.

"That's why you always come back so sad and shaken up, no?". It kind of angered him, that Y/N never told him any of that.

"Yeah". She could feel his anger, but she didn't have the guts to talk about it now. She knew she fucked up, that she kept the love of her life in the dark because of pure and terrible shame. Charles deserved better than to be lied to.

They arrived at Amsterdam at 2 in the morning and traveling to Roosteren would take them two hours, driving at a legal speed. They weren't walking into the woods at 4 AM, ready to be totally consumed by it, so they booked some rooms and spent the night in Amsterdam. Max got his own room, retiring to it instantly, on the other hand, Charles and Y/N waited some more to go to bed. There was this tension, so many lies and so many secrets. Charles needed to know more, he needed to feel like she trusted him, because if she couldn't, then he couldn't trust her back. They drank some whisky in the bar of the hotel, sitting in a dark corner, trying to avoid curious eyes. He watched her down her glass like it was water and it brought him back to an old memory, one created not too far from there, in Belgium.

It was his rookie year in F1, and she was there to support him, but she wasn't letting him know that so easily. They had hooked up a few times before but they never have brought up the talk about feelings. It was hard for Charles, getting close, it didn't matter how much he liked her, he had trouble letting her in. She was as cold on the outside, like an iceberg, and if it was hard for Charles with easy-going girls, getting along with this one was even harder. The race went terrible, he DNFd and Max got a podium, which made things difficult between them. He was sitting in a bar, abusing of the privilege of not being so famous yet, drinking his weight in whisky, behind his trainer's back. She spotted him instantly, her red hair loose and her eyes bright as she entered the bar. He couldn't tear his eyes away from her when he caught the swing of her hips as she waltzed towards his table. She sat down without saying a word and they drank together, until they couldn't take it anymore. He had the confession on the tip of his tongue, he was just a little push away from telling her how much he loved her, but there was still this fear, this distance he couldn't walk. "What is it, Charles?", she asked him, with rosy cheeks and a big smile, talking for the first time since she sat at the table. "Nothing", he shied away, avoiding her eyes. "You know, you can trust me any secret you have. I won't tell", she teased him with a smirk and he couldn't help but mimic the action. "It's too big of a secret, you'd ran away the moment I tell you", that picked her interest. "What if I told you a secret of mine first? To build some trust". She ran her hand up his arm, her touch ghosting his skin and he could feel all of his nerve-ends on fire. "Okay, Cherie, tell me". That earned him a giggle from her and with her lips close to his ear, she let out her secret. "Today I was rooting for you, and even though you DNFd, I still feel like a winner when you look at me". She paused, not missing on the hitch in his breath, before continuing, she licked her lips. "So c'mon, Charlie, if you still think you can't tell me your secret... try me". He turned around, his heart pounding inside his chest and he finally met her gaze. With a full heart and new found courage, he kissed her like he had meant for a long time to do so. Spilling his secret wasn't the only thing he did that night.

"Are you guys ready?". Max asked at the other side of the room's door.

"Yeah, we'll be out in a minute". Y/N yelled back the response. They had barely slept and it was the first time in years that they both shared a bed without touching at all, like even the smallest of caresses could just break them down instantly. "Do you have everything, love?"

"Yes". He was the one being monosyllabic now. But it was alright, she felt like she deserved it.

"Morning". She greeted Max once they were out of the room and towards the rented car Max got while they were still getting ready. Her best friend gave her a small smile, looking back and forth between her and her husband, who was a few meters away, paying for the room. She tried to reassure him. "It's okay".

"You need to fix this, Y/N". Max told her and she looked at him curiously. "I know I wasn't his biggest fan before, but I like the guy now, okay?". She scoffed. "I mean it, don't loose him, not like this". She looked down. "You fix this, whatever it takes, Bunny".

The drive was tense but short and even shorter was their encounter with the Chief of Police, who robbed them 500.000 euros to let them camp in the woods. They didn't hesitate and paid the money without complaining. At the car, they pulled out the map and looked for the best route to get to the points the haven't searched yet. There wasn't much land that they needed to cover, the only reason Max and Y/N stopped was because everything had become too much for them to bear. The last time they went there, a few months back, the last night was so tough on them that they promised they wouldn't go back. There was still hope though, that they could find Maud in that little part of land that was left untouched. Charles seemed to get everything in pretty quickly, he was a smart guy and it didn't take him long before he was even putting out ideas and suggesting paths on the map. They were going to camp in the center of the land they were searching and their tent would stay there for the whole five days, it was not just for them to have some kind of base to go back to, but also a geographical reference for them, so they wouldn't get lost. Every distance they walked was previously measured from their camp, they would walk and check a quadrant of 10 meters each day, which meant that every day they would walk 10 meters further away from their confort zone. The 50-meters distance they'd reach by day 5 was the most dangerous, because they'd be more tired and worn out by then, making it harder to get back to the camp if they needed. Charles knew that he had to try and sleep as good as possible if he wanted to be ready for that.

"Remember, we're on October now, we have to get back to the camp at 6 PM at most". Y/N reminded them. "Everything after that would be dangerous".

"Charles, I just want to make sure you remember everything". Max started and the monegasque looked up from the map to meet his gaze. Max wanted him to repeat the night plan again. "Please, just one more time".

"I take a leak before dinner, eat, wrap up everything, get in the tent and never get out until sunrise". Charles chanted for the tenth time.

"Never get out before sunrise, no matter what you hear, no matter what you see". Y/N added. "Promise me".

"I promise".

Charles had never, ever in his life, pictured himself looking for a dead body. Ever. But there he was, moving dirt around, trying to see if he could find anything that proved to be a grave. Max and Y/N gave him a compass, a map, a pen, water, food, a gun and a book of plants to help him search the ground. He had learned that there were some plant that fed on decaying tissue and he could use the book to see if any of those plants grew on his quadrant. Max was doing what he could, considering that his legs were still in pretty bad shape, Charles wondered if he needed help. On the other hand, he was kind of glad that he could be away from Y/N the whole day, he was still angry and didn't want to say something that he would regret later. The time alone could help him cool down. He searched and searched, stopping only to eat and drink twice. Searching wasn't that demanding physically, but the attention to detail he needed to decide if he could move from one place to another was exhausting. He felt the pressure, what if he decided that there was nothing in that square meter and he made a mistake? What if his mistake meant they'd never find Maud? It was a lot of pressure, so he made sure, completely sure, that there was nothing there before he moved on. Though the day, once in a while he saw his wife in the distance, they weren't that far away on that first day. She meticulously checked every plant and carefully removed the dirt to check underneath it. He felt his chest heavy, he wanted nothing more than to go to her and hug her, he could see she was hurting, but the pain he felt because of her lies kept him away. He rather focused on his own task. At 6 PM, he walked back to the camp.

"Do you want more?". Max asked Charles, extending his arm to hand him another sealed can of tuna salad. They had stoked themselves with a wide variety of canned foods to eat for over a week, making sure to over-stoke themselves in case something happened. Even if Max hated tuna, he ate it like it was the best food he had ever had. It was like in those woods, they were so deep into their survival mood that nothing superficial mattered anymore.

"No, thanks, mate". Charles refused. "I don't want to eat too much and then wake up feeling all heavy and tired"

"Yeah, I get it". The Dutchman paused and looked away, unsure if he should ask, but his best friend was using a tree as her personal bathroom and it was his only chance alone with Charles to ask. "How are things between you two?"

"Well...". Max felt terrible for asking when he saw the flash of pain in Charles' eyes. "I guess we have a lot to talk about when we get back home". Max just hummed.

"I'm all done". Y/N informed them and sat back down between them. Max looked at her sternly, he didn't like that she went there alone after dinner. "I'm sorry, but I really had to go again".

"Let's just go to sleep". Max said retiring to the tent. Charles and Y/N didn't move, looking at anything but each other. The tent wasn't big and they couldn't just sleep with Max in the middle. After a moment of silence, Charles sighed and got up, walking straight to the tent and not looking back.

All she hoped for was forgiveness, haunted by the ghosts of all of her regrets, it seemed like the thing she wanted the most was the only one she couldn't get.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

So... another part here! I hope you guys like this Halloween special. I love writing horror, suspense and sci-fic, so I'll probably start including some of my stories in the future.

Meerdere veroordeelden aangehouden door FASTNL

Driebergen - De politie heeft donderdagochtend 2 februari in Ouddorp een 40-jarige man aangehouden en ’s avonds in Rijswijk zijn 52-jarige kompaan. De twee mannen uit Polen zijn in dat land veroordeeld voor drie en respectievelijk zes jaar gevangenisstraf wegens oplichting. Het Fugitive Active Search Team (FAST) uit Polen heeft FASTNL gevraagd om de twee op te sporen en aan te houden. De twee Polen boden op internet auto’s en landbouwvoertuigen te koop aan, maar leverden niet na een aanbetaling. De schade die ze hebben veroorzaakt heeft een waarde van 1,5 miljoen euro. Na het verzoek van FAST Polen traceerde FASTNL de 40-jarige man met zijn gezin op een vakantiepark in Ouddorp. Daar hielden ze hem in een vakantiewoning in de vroege ochtend aan. Met verkregen informatie kon later die dag in een winkelcentrum in Rijswijk de 52-jarige andere veroordeelde worden aangehouden. De rechtbank in Amsterdam buigt zich over hun overlevering aan Polen om de daar opgelegde straffen uit te zitten. Zes jaar Afgelopen zondag 29 januari hield FASTNL een 58-jarige Rotterdammer in Roosteren aan. De man is in Nederland veroordeeld tot het betalen van 979.000 euro. Daarnaast wordt deze man nog gezocht door de Belgische autoriteiten alwaar hij is veroordeeld voor een gevangenisstraf van 6 jaar. De veroordeelde was onderweg naar een restaurant toen hij is aangehouden. Hij probeerde tevergeefs nog te voet aan de FAST-leden te ontkomen. Buitenland FASTNL is een samenwerking tussen het Landelijk Parket van het Openbaar Ministerie en politie en is een team van de Dienst Landelijke Recherche van de Landelijke Eenheid. Het team heeft één missie: voortvluchtige criminelen weer achter de tralies krijgen. Veel voortvluchtigen worden in en met behulp van het buitenland aangehouden. Dit komt doorgaans tot stand door gebruik te maken van het ENFAST-netwerk (European Network of Fugitive Active Search Teams), waar FASTNL deel van uitmaakt. Er kan snel geschakeld worden en aanhouding en overlevering wordt vaak spoedig uitgevoerd. Vanuit dit netwerk ontvangt FASTNL ook wekelijks opsporingsverzoeken van buitenlandse voortvluchtigen die zich mogelijk in Nederland schuilhouden. Bron: Politie Read the full article

I'm open for bookings in March! Standard days are Tuesdays and Thursdays 9:30-16:30 other days are flexible. Ask for availability ☺ I still have some spots left on Tuesday 31st of January 14:00-16:30 and Thursday 9 February 9:30-13:00. You can always ask for inquiries via WhatsApp on 0638028103 ~ Mijn agenda is geopend voor maart! Standaard werkdagen zijn dinsdag en donderdag 9:30-16:30. Andere dagen zijn flexibel te plannen in overleg. Ik heb nog plaats om bij te werken op dinsdag 31 januari van 14:00 tot 16:30 en donderdag 9 februari 9:30 tot 13:00. Je mag me altijd appen voor meer informatie 0638028103. Ik zit in midden Limburg te Roosteren 🤗 #nomaddreadsNL #dutchdreads #dutchdreadlocks #dreadsnederland #dreadmaintenance #locmaintenance #dreadlockmaintenance #dreadstagram #lovelocs #dreads #echtedreads #dreadsbijwerken #bijgewerktedreads #dreadsvaneigenhaar #dreadsrestaureren #crochetdreadlockmaintenance #dreadmaker #loctitian #dreadlocktechnician #dreadsforyou #dreadsforlife #locs4life #instadreads #dreadheads #dreadslife #dreadsrule #rastas #raszta #dreadinstall #dreadextensions https://www.instagram.com/p/CnyorOfjex3/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Scouting Boxtel zit niet stil in december

De maand december was voor Scouting Boxtel een maand met volop stoere activiteiten en financiële acties. In dit artikel nemen we je mee langs een aantal van deze activiteiten.

Kerstkaarten Dit jaar bezorgden leden van Scouting Boxtel weer kerstkaarten in Boxtel, Liempde, Lennisheuvel en Esch. De actie was wederom een groot succes, waarbij er ruim 2000 kaarten werden bezorgd. Hiermee werd een mooi bedrag opgehaald voor Scouting Boxtel, waarmee er weer leuke activiteiten georganiseerd kunnen worden en spelmateriaal kan worden aangeschaft. De vereniging wil iedereen bedanken voor het inleveren van de kerstkaarten.

Kerstmarkt Op zondag 18 december stonden de explorers (jongens en meiden van 15 t/m 18 jaar) op de kerstmarkt in het centrum van Boxtel. De explorers verzorgden een warm vuurtje, enkele leuke spelletjes, en lekkere marshmallows. Kinderen die de kerstmarkt bezochten werden uitgedaagd om een spelletje te spelen. Zo konden ze mega Jenga spelen, een Tangram puzzel oplossen, of met een pijl en boog schieten. Wanneer de kinderen dit goed gedaan hadden, ontvingen ze als prijs een marshmallow welke ze zelf boven het kampvuur mochten roosteren.

Kabelbaan Het weekend van 16 t/m 18 december vond het ouder-kind-weekend van de scouts vrijdag (jongens en meiden van 11 t/m 15 jaar) plaats. Er werd levend Cluedo gespeeld in Esch, waarbij in kleine groepjes opdrachten uitgevoerd moesten worden op zoek naar de dader, wapen en de plaats van delict. Eén van de opdrachten was om met de hele groep over de kabelbaan te steken die over het haventje was gespannen. Dit vergde de nodige samenwerking en natuurlijk ook moed. Menig ouder had er heel wat meer moeite mee dan de scouts.

Winterhike De verkenners (jongens van 11 t/m 15 jaar) gingen van 27 t/m 29 december op hun jaarlijkse winterhike. Van Venlo liepen de 15 jongens naar Arcen voor de eerste overnachting, waarna ze via natuurgebied de Maasduinen hun weg vervolgden naar hun tweede logeeradres in Blitterswijck. De laatste dag liepen ze verder naar Venray, waar ze weer werden opgehaald door de ouders. Elke dag werd de route opgedeeld in 4 delen, met telkens een andere routetechniek. In totaal werd er zo’n 50 kilometer afgelegd.

Oliebollen Zaterdag 31 december delen de Romulus en Remus welpen (jongens van 7 t/m 11 jaar) weer oliebollen uit op Selissen. Zij doen dit namens de winkeliersvereniging Selissen. De welpen mogen allemaal komen helpen om de mensen die de laatste boodschappen van het jaar doen een lekkere oliebol te geven. Om tussen het wandelen door even op te warmen, zal er ook een lekker kampvuurtje zijn. Zo bezorgen de welpen u hopelijk een prettige afsluiting van 2022!

Bron: Scouting Boxtel

Ik Ben Er Maar

Ik word wakker. Ik lig onder een de stoffen lap. De zolderdak is boven mij. De beatlesposter. Hangt verkeerd. Dak. Dak. Honger. Eten. Geen zin. Moe, uitgeput, ik ga overdenken. Mijn huisgenoot zegt dit, zegt dat, dat vind ik niet leuk, zij moet stoppen met praten. Zij doet woke. Dat zei Red. Woke season. Dat liet me denken. We zitten in woke season. We zaten in woke season. Ik nog wel. Ik loop achter. Ik ben niet goed genoeg. Ik zit nog in mijn kop. Stom. Depressief. Ik lig verder. Ik doe niks. Ik pak mijn nokia. Hij is leeg. Ik laad hem op. Een of geen berichten van Aleja. Ik ben neutraal of blij. Ik ga naar de badkamer, ik ga plassen. Ik ben er maar.

Dan maar eten. Je moet gezond eten. Brood roosteren. In de rooster. Mijn huisgenoot naast de keuken. Is mijn huisgenoot er? Ik mag haar niet. Ik ben bang voor haar, ik ben bang voor wat ze nu weer zegt. Tomaat snijden, dat is gezond. Ik zit vast, help. Dan eten in de woonkamer. Dan naar boven. Omkleden. Weer de zwarte broek aan. Ik zet mijn computer aan. Ik ga een liedje luisteren. Zelf gemaakt. Ik wil trots zijn. Maar mijn aandacht is er niet bij. Ik denk aan andere dingen. Aan alles. Ik doe dingen, maar ik ga maar door de bewegingen heen. Ik vergeet het. Afgeleid. Internet. Interessante wikipedia. Cultuurmarxisme. Lezen. Interessant. Uren gaan voorbij.

Ik maak me zorgen. Opleiding? Geen zin. Ik zit vast. Rut. Slump. Pmuls. Dan moet ik opzoeken. Geen zin. In de middag honger. Dan maar eten. Snel, of anders rotzooi. Snoep. Chocola. Alles is weg, geen standaarden, ik ben vrij, maar ik word beheersd. Ik zit vast. Dan is het avond. Eten van gisteren. Of een turkse pizza.

Aleja bellen. Dan word ik wakker. Ik praat echt. Ik herinner me mijn goede voornemens. Ik zou elke dag voor mezelf zorgen, ik zou een ochtendritueel starten. Ik wilde helderder zijn, meer actie ondernemen, minder passief zijn. Beweging is belangrijk, maar ik heb nooit zin om te gaan sporten. Ik kan het wel, maar dat kost weer tijd en moeite. Hardlopen is saai, maar ik kan toch wat anders doen? Fietsen? Mountainbiken. Ik ben een complete slaaf. Ik moet bewegen. Anders doen. Ik weet het, en ik voel me schuldig. Alleen als ik met iemand praat, en het gesprek is opgewarmd, dan krijg ik een glimp van hoe ik het wilde. En soms, de laatste keer was echt een half jaar geleden, voel ik hoe het ook alweer was om vrij te zijn. Om iets spontaans te doen, om te zeggen, om een echt gesprek te hebben, iets wat echt aan voelt. Niet in mijn bubbel, geen zinloze discussies of ruziefantasieën. Geen schaamte, gewoon vrijheid. Ik perk mezelf in, ben ik bang voor mezelf? Ik durf niet vooruit te kijken, ik maak mezelf liever blind, ik raak liever afgeleid. Zo word je nooit groot.

Dan ga ik maar slapen. Uitgeput van het niets doen, maar nooit voldaan. Mijn schuld. Ik kon alles doen vandaag en ik deed niets. Ik wil Aleja zien, kan zij mij losschudden? Ik moet niet afhankelijk van haar zijn. Ik breek mijn zelfbeschermingsmechanismen terwijl ik denk dat ik vrijer word. De vrijheid is te vinden in de vangrails, niet in hedonisme. Morgen werken. Ik kan niet meer denken. Ik ben helemaal niet vrij. Ik sluit mijn tabblad.