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theygender · 2 months
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Having a vagina honestly sucks bc it's like you have to do fucking alchemy just to prevent yourself from getting sick. You've got an intricate ecosystem of microorganisms down there that you're dependent on for your own well-being and they can be set off by the tiniest fucking thing
Keeping your pubes too short can cause yeast infections, but letting them get too long can also cause yeast infections. Washing the area with specialized soap can help prevent yeast infections, but it can also cause them. Your periods can cause yeast infections, and so can the medicine you take to stop your periods. Having sex can cause yeast infections, especially if the person you're having sex with is diabetic (???). Being diabetic can cause yeast infections. Wearing the wrong clothes or eating the wrong things can cause yeast infections. Not getting enough fucking sleep can cause yeast infections. The list is neverending
Luckily, yeast infections are fairly easy to treat with OTC medicine that you can find at any Walmart. BUT! Even if all of your symptoms indicate that you have a yeast infection, you have to take a test first to confirm that it's a yeast infection (they do not sell the tests at Walmart) bc you might actually have the opposite of a yeast infection (bacterial vaginosis) which has the exact same symptoms as a yeast infection but is caused by an imbalance of different microorganisms. And if you use yeast infection medicine to treat a bacterial infection it will light your pussy on fire. So if you have a bacterial infection, you must instead visit your local witch doctor (gynecologist) and get prescribed special potions (antibiotics) to treat it
Antibiotics can also cause yeast infections
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aweega · 1 year
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jeff the unaliver doing tiktok dances over my dead body after stabbing me thirty eight times in the chest
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spicybeefu · 3 months
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What if Pokemon & Animal crossing had a crossover game?!
Made in Blender with old PokemonXAC posts as my reference, mixed with models ripped from New Leaf.
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anna-scribbles · 2 months
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inspired by recent events from my sister’s actual real life
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life-on-our-planet · 1 month
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The Patagonian mara is a large rodent, resembling a large jackrabbit and most closely related to capybaras and guinea pigs. They're monogamous until one partner dies, but generally breeding happens in large communal dens where care of young is occasionally shared. ©
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daeyumi · 24 days
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i love it when ppl put kirby into desserts
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beybuniki · 13 days
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kofi request of deku and bakugo reading comics togetherrrr, i made this part of the quirkless au where they befriend each other during their 1st year at UA
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pinkhairswagtourney · 3 months
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my friend harmony is a disabled trans lesbian who was recently kicked out twice by transphobic relatives and friends . she’s been applying for jobs but she hasn’t had any luck yet . she currently has no source of income and nowhere to rest her head at night except her car , and it’s been below freezing where she lives . 
this is ongoing and will be ongoing until further notice – she needs money to eat , to fill her car with gas , and to rent a hotel room . even a few dollars would help her so much at this point . if you can’t help monetarily , please please boost this post !! i am so worried about her , this has been going on for over a month and she isn’t doing well ]:
p-yp-l ( her only way of receiving money rn )
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grimfantas · 2 months
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under the same umbrella…? to hell with that! if i did that, um, it'd mean…w-we'd practically be like a couple!
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sleepyshrooms · 24 days
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making a new post bc the old one was getting notes with no donos i spent my entire paycheck on prescriptions and i've been unable to afford anything to eat . i've also been dealing with severe fibro flareups that caused me to miss a few days last week so i already know my next check is going to be short . if anyone could throw a few bucks my way so i can get some food , i would appreciate it very much . i'll leave my commission info and links below . thanks for reading
p-yp-l c-sh-pp commission info
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magentasnail · 1 month
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if you still do them, could you maybe do autism creature with / in a train / tank. as they are some big default autism interests.
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choo choo !
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radio-writes · 2 months
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Going on anon bc this is a bit messed up but can you write Alastor x reader where Alastor uses sex as a form of torture?
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Fuck your God and His Righteous Hand(s)
Synopsis: Hasn't Alastor always been such generous partner? Hasn't He always provided for you? Given you everything and anything you ever wanted? Except for your freedom of course.
The night you decide to run away from his graciousness, you find out just how generous he could be.
Warnings: noncon, forced relationship, mentions of blood, mentions of murder, physical harm to reader, degradation, smut, over stimulation, tentacles are used (I probably missed a lot, let me know)
Tags: Alastor x fem!reader; dead dove do not eat
MDNI
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Your heart beat loudly against your chest, your breath ragged and heavy. Branches and twigs snapped and broke and fell all around you as you ran.
Not that you could hear any of it over the overwhelming sound of static flooding your ears. 
As if the dark wasn't terrifying enough, you had to stumble through the woods with tears blurring your vision too. Arm stretched in front of you, swatting away vines in your path as you desperately tried to get away.
You had to get away.
You couldn't get away.
You could almost feel the ground shake beneath your feet. You could almost feel his breath that skimmed the back of your head. There was no use in running, but run you did anyway.
You kept running even when you felt his clawed fingers grab at your shirt; the fabric tearing easily.
You kept running even when you could hear his voice right by your ear. "I think it's in your best interest not to anger me any more, darling."
You couldn't keep running when a heavy, velvety tentacle wrapped around your ankle; your breath knocked out of you as you tumbled onto the forest floor.
Your hand outstretched, palm reaching into the darkness. It was a terrifying, unknown, and threatening darkness—but to you it still meant freedom.
That was the last clear thing you saw before you landed flat on your stomach, the weight of your failed escape weighing you down more than the dark shadow around your leg. 
He was laughing.
He was out of breath, panting almost as heavily as you were, but he was laughing.
You heard the crunch of leaves and twigs as he approached your collapsed form. No longer rushing, no longer frantic. He seemed to take his time as he walked towards you, now that he's sure you couldn't get away.
Still, the tentacle holding you down tightened—a warning not to try anything again.
Not that you could. The moment of rest allowed to you as you laid on the ground, made the pain and exhaustion of your body much too apparent for your liking. Your legs felt like led, the numerous scratches from who-knows-where all sung in a harmony of stinging pain.
Even when you knew you couldn't run anymore, your mind frantically whirled through ideas. You tried to think of something, anything, to keep away from the Radio Demon.
At least until his shoes finally came into your view; the red accents bright against the inky darkness. They stopped right by your head, and suddenly it felt too dangerous to even think.
You found the dirt and mud of the forest floor much more appealing than having to look Alastor in the eye, so you kept your head down. Your head shrunk into the ground as the man looked down on you.
"I must admit, I hadn't expected you to run." Alastor said, still a hint of laughter in his tone. Had you looked up then, you would have seen just how much of a mess you've made of the demon. His hand pushed his red hair back from his forehead, sweat trickled down the side of his neck. 
But it wasn't his unusual state of exhaustion that would have been shocking if you looked at him right now. No, what would have been surprising—what would have been unnerving— was the wild, desperate look in his glowing red eyes.
While you were scared, desperate to get away.
He was terrified, desperate to get you back.
The view of your small figure as you weaved through trees, dipping in and out of his sight had filled him with such cold, heavy dread.
Almost as much as the sight of your hand nearly meeting that of another demon's.
"Oh! But you're so filled of the unexpected today, aren't you, darling?" You could hear the spite in his tone, but you didn't dare raise your head.
You felt him step closer.
"I mean, I hadn't expected you to try to sell your soul to another demon, either." You cringed, lifting your arms over your ears as the static warped his voice terribly.
You felt a heavy weight on the back of your head. It rested there briefly, before it shoved you down further into the dirt. Your face pressed down into the mud, but you didn't dare fight back. You didn't dare move. The most reaction you allowed yourself was a small whimper of fear.
The sound fueled Alastor's rage, already barely kept under the surface of his smile. His eye twitched in annoyance. Why were you shaking? Why were you afraid? 
Shouldn't you be kissing the foot on your head right now? Shouldn't you be thanking him for saving you from making a terrible mistake? A soul as unique as yours would have been wasted on a demon like that. 
This ungrateful behavior, this attempt to leave him, just wouldn't do.
His foot left the back of your head, but it allowed no relief. The black tentacle wrapped around your leg swiftly yanked you up.
Your eyes widened in shock and your hands dug into the ground in an attempt to stay there. But it isn't a surprise that your flimsy resistance was easily broken through. The world soon turned into a dizzying blur of colors as you were lifted into the air. The trees floated from above and the sky was a muddy mess of leaves and roots, your arms hung limply above your head. The blood that now rushed to your head didn't help you in making much sense of what was happening.
But none of that mattered when your eyes finally met Alastor's.
As you were held up by your leg, upside down in the air, Alastor's usual wide smile looked like a snarling frown. His narrowed eyes did nothing to help the fear that quickly ate its way through you.
It was silent for a moment. Tension so thick in the air that you found it so terribly difficult to breathe.
But when he finally spoke, you thought to yourself how you actually preferred the suspenseful quiet.
"Have I not been the perfect partner?" Alastor asked. The static over his voice now eerily back to the usual amount. His tone was cheery, light, like this was just another early morning chit chat over breakfast between the two of you.
You couldn't bring yourself to speak.
The black appendage holding you up tightened, your skin already beginning to bruise. Although, it seemed that was the only indicator of Alastor's true mood, as the demon remained composed in front of you.
"Have I not given you everything you wanted?" He asked as he brought you closer to him.
When you didn't respond he brought his clawed hand up to your face. 
You flinched, feeling his cold skin against yours, fearing that he'd tear right through your flesh. 
But his touch was gentle. His fingers softly brushed away the mud and grime from your cheek. 
"I've bought you everything you liked. I've protected you. Fed you." His voice was so soft, soothing. Like an old radio show you would have listened to while you drifted off to a restful slumber. 
"I've even fucked you through your pathetic little heats." His claws dug into your skin. Blood gushed down your face, the scarlet liquid stung your eye even as you clenched it closed. 
"I've spared useless, disgusting sinners on your request. I've played nice for you. I've given you everything." His hand shifted from your cheek to your neck, his grip tight, threatening.
The static over his voice once again horrid as it deafened you. His eyes, now drowned in black, narrowed into a glare at your form.
Your hands flew to your throat, pulling at Alastor's fingers. "Please, I'm sorry, Al!" You begged as you struggled. Your body flailed and squirmed as he held you above him, looking almost like a fish torn from the sea, desperate to breathe.
"Oh you're sorry?" Alastor's head titled to one side as he watched you. "That absolutely changes everything then!" He said cheerily, mockingly.
The tentacle holding you up loosened out of nowhere, sending you down into the mud for a second time that night.
You managed to keep yourself up by your arms as you greedily heaved in air back into your lungs. Your head still spun from the rush of blood, and you felt like you were about to vomit out whatever flesh Alastor made you eat earlier that day.
You felt something at your chin—Alastor's microphone it seemed—and it tilted your face towards him. Your teary eyes met his cheerful ones, and your chest tightened. It's been a long time since you've even stepped outside, but you now felt more trapped than you ever have before.
He bent down, lowering his face closer to yours as he smiled down at you. 
"Since it seems like I've neglected my dear darling partner for so long that they've decided to seek attention elsewhere, I think it's best to spend some nice quality time together. Don't you think that'd be nice, sweetheart?" Alastor's voice held no threats. Promises. Only promises.
You shook your head no before he even finished talking. A desperate shaking hand reached up to him. "No, please. Al. Anywhere but the radio tower again. Please."
"Don't worry, doll. This time will a bit different." He assured.
You moved quickly, hurriedly, scrambling to your knees ready to beg at his feet. But before you could even part your lips to start, Alastor had both of you melted into shadows.
You re-materialize in the one place that haunted your dreams. The one place in Hell that truly, actually, did feel like hell to you.
Your blood felt frozen as you remained on the floor. Eyes wide in fear as you stared at the control panel.
Alastor turned his back to you, humming cheerfully, nonchalantly, as he made his way towards the main seat. "There's no need to look so alarmed," He said, you could almost hear the way his eyes rolled at your stupid expression. "We won't be having any special guests for this broadcast."
You finally tore your eyes away from the contraptions. Your gaze landing on Alastor's wide back as he slowly removed his coat. "You...you won't be torturing some poor soul?" You asked confused—and admittedly a little hopeful.
You couldn't count the horrible days he had made you sit and watch and listen as he took his sweet time tearing souls apart. How he joyously broadcasted the tortured screams for his Hell's entertainment.
Alastor's grin widened, stretched just a tad bit too far, before he turned his head to look back at you.
"Oh," Heavy static morphed his voice once more. "I didn't say that."
You didn't have time to react before his tentacles sprouted from his back, his inner shirt ripping to make way for them. They grabbed at your limbs, slithering around to get a tight hold as they pulled you to him.
A scream ripped from your throat at the sheer suddenness of it, and it made Alastor's heart leap in his chest. Oh how he loved those adorable reactions of yours.
"That is delightful! But do save your voice, dear. I do have to start us off first," He said gleefully as he turned around to fiddle with the controls.
You heart sunk. Eyes wide as the realization hit you. He wasn't going to force you to listen to someone being tortured. 
"Alastor, wait—"
"Why hello, you wayward sinners! Hope everyone's having a wonderfully hellish time right now, because boy do I have quite the treat to make your evenings even better!" Alastor spoke into the mic, his eyes gone black as he held your gaze. "Yes, indeed, this one is going to be very special." 
"Al, please—" You bit your lip, cutting off whatever pleas you were going to throw at him.
One of his tentacles pressed against your clothed mound as the others held you in the air. It quickly worked its way under your bottoms, ripping through it easily and exposing you to Alastor's lazy gaze. 
"Don't, please. I'm so sorry, Al. I won't do it again, I promise, please." You whispered, not wanting all of Hell to hear how you begged for mercy.
"What's that, darling? I'm afraid you'll have to be a little louder for our lovely, horrid, listeners." Alastor mocked, just as the tentacle between your legs started to slide between your folds. Another made quick work of your already torn shirt.
You grit your teeth and clenched your eyes closed. Stubbornly, you refused to make a single sound from Alastor's ministrations.
But you know how this ends.
You're hardly the first soul he had broken during a broadcast.
You, of all people, knew that well.
Another one of his appendages slithered its way to your core. It teased at the entrance, pushing, testing your hole.
"I hope everyone has a lovely time!" You hear Alastor speak to his listeners, just as a scream ripped through your lips.
You weren't nearly wet enough to take him. Your walls resisted, but not enough for his strength. The black shadow pushed its way deep into you, others coiled at your legs to spread them apart. One remained by your clit, lazily flicking along. 
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" You cried as Alastor fucked his tentacle deep into you. The harsh thrusts sending your ample chest bouncing.
Alastor didn't respond, he rarely ever does to his victims. He preferred to let the song of their anguish play uninterrupted. But he did find himself paying more attention than he usually did to the way your body reacted to him.
His gaze locked at the way his black shadow disappeared into your slick hole. How it came back to light drenched in your juices, only to push back in harsher. How your little pussy stretched wide around his tentacle to accommodate its size.
His eyes traveled further up, watching as he wrapped one tentacle around your breast and squeezed. A lovely horrified sound coming from your lips from his actions.
He watched as you sobbed, attention fully on him. Only on him. And he couldn't deny the rather unfamiliar heat the pooled in his stomach at that fact.
The tentacle at your clit moved faster, pressing down just the slightest bit more at that little bud. You tried your damndest to silence the screams from your throat, but as your mouth fell open, you could only do so much.
The coil in your gut snapped easily. Alastor tightening his hold on you as he kept your spasming form in the air for his entertainment.
Your juices flowed down his dark appendages as it kept up the pace. Tears forming in your eyes as they gave you no reprieve, no time recover.
You fight against his hold, aching to close your thighs and catch your breath but the dark shadows merely pulled them apart wider. You pulled at you arms, wanting to push away the damned things from your core but you were merely held back the same way.
"Wait, please, stop." You were barely able to form a coherent sentence. The tentacle inside you opting to curl just the right amount to hit that soft, perfect spot inside you with every thrust. That spot that Alastor knew drove you wild when he fucks you through your heat, after a lot of begging on your end, at least.
You clenched down on it, that being the only thing you could think of that you could still do to slow this down. It unsurprisingly did nothing but make you feel more of each drag and pull against your walls.
Another orgasm is stolen from you as a tentacle began to grind itself up and down your sloppy slit, drenching itself in your slick as it attempted to join the one already fucking you. Your screams broadcasted for all of Pride Ring to hear.
It doesn't stop. He doesn't stop. His dark shadows held you still, fucking into your cervix without mercy, playing with your clit, your breasts. Pulling yet another sloppy orgasm from you.
"No more," You heaved. Alastor's assault seeing no end near. "I can't. Al, please." You begged.
You craned your neck over to look back at the demon. You find his gaze no longer on you or your body, but on the papers in front of him. His script. 
He was idly jotting down notes, chin rested on the palm of his hand and a lazy smile on his face. He almost looked bored, but the twitch of his ear as you called out his name showed you he was still paying you some attention. 
"Alastor, please," You tried again. "I am sorry. I won't do it again. I won't leave you again." You sobbed.
The tentacle inside you pulled out to your brief relief, only for it to slam harshly, deeper back into you. It's pace at breakneck speed that even with the tight hold around your limbs, your body was moved with every push and pull. 
"Oh, I'm sure you won't, darling." He finally replies to your pleas, although he didn't even glance your way. He continued correcting his notes, your sweet begging made for a wonderfully sweet background song. "Because why would you ever leave someone as generous as me?"
He ripped orgasm after orgasm from you. Your release dripped and drenched the floor of his radio tower. You begged til your throat was raw for some reprieve, for some forgiveness. But Alastor went about his way around the studio. Fixing this and that. Barely paid you any mind.
It was only when you've stopped pulling against his hold. When your legs had gone slack in the air, and your screams faded into whimpers did Alastor finally approach the control panel again.
"Wasn't that just darling! A wonderful performance, if I do say so myself," He laughed into his microphone. "I'm sure you lewd folks enjoyed yourself as much as our star of the night here, so make sure to keep an ear out for my next broadcast!"
His eyes finally land on your exhausted body. Your chest heaved with every labored breath as Alastor's tentacles finally slowly pulled out of you. A wet shlop of your juices dripping out as it did. 
He slowly lowered you onto the ruined floor, and your dazed eyes locked with his.
"There will definitely be more of where that came from." He said, less of his usual cheer. His tone lower. Threatening—no, promising.
You didn't move—you couldn't move—from the floor. You simply watched as Alastor shut down his broadcast and took his time straightening out and cleaning up his work station. He was humming cheerfully, seeming to be in a much better mood than when the night had begun.
When he was finally satisfied, you watched as he walked to where you were, stopping by your feet as he smiled down at you.
"Well, you've definitely seen better days." A laugh track followed his mockery. 
"I'm sorry." You heaved out. You hoped this was the end of it. You hoped he would just throw you back and lock you in his room again. Anything but stay in this wretched radio tower. "I'm yours. I won't try to run anymore."
Alastor chuckled at your response, moving to rest his cane against the wall before he reached up to his neck. He slowly loosened his bowtie and unbuttoned his shirt. "Oh I know you know that." He said waving off your words as if they didn't matter.
He lowered himself over you, his towering figure blocking out what little light you had. "But I'm afraid I need a bit of a reminder about who you belong to." 
His hand made quick work of his trousers, pulling his hardened cock free.
His claws were at your waist and they pulled your limp body closer to him. Not that you offered any resistance.
"You can do one more for me can't you darling?" He wasn't really asking.
You can't. But you nod your head anyway.
He pushed into you easily. Your previous releases coated him and allowed a slicker entry. 
Your back arched despite exhaustion, and Alastor drank in your pained expression. "There's a good girl. Always ready to ruin herself for her lover." You heard him say. "Don't worry, I won't make this long."
But of course that was a lie. He pulled back so slowly, revering in the way your drenched walls felt around him; how they clenched around his cock like how he saw them do around his tentacle. Then he thrusted himself back harshly into your sloppy hole, forcing what little sound you could still make out from your lips.
He fucked into you, slowly, deeply, maddeningly. Making sure you both felt each and every drag of his heavy cock.
He wasn't one to crave sex as much as most of hell, but when it was with you—his precious partner, he had to admit he didn't hate the sensations all too much. And if it meant reminding you who was in control, if it meant making you owe him, making you dependent on him, making you crave him, then it was all the more enjoyable to see you fucked out and speared on his dick.
One of his hands made its way to the back of your neck, pulling you up into his lap. He fucked up into you as your head lolled to the side, struggling to keep your body upright.
Alastor drank in your expression. Your glazed over eyes, the tear stains that smeared through the mud and blood along your cheeks, the drool dripping from your split lips. Yes, this is what you deserved for even daring to leave him. This is what you needed to be reminded on just how good a partner he is.
He wrapped a tentacle around your hips, keeping you steady as he pounded his cock into you. His free hand now moved between you, to your clit.
Your hips spasmed as he drew quick circles on the bud, but you fought the instinct to squirm away. You wouldn't leave him. 
You can't leave him.
You know that now.
Alastor's grin widened when he noticed your actions. "There's a good girl." He purred again, leaning down to your neck to lick up your skin.
"Let me feel you cum on my cock now, darling. Let me feel how much you want me to fill you up." He whispered, his sweet voice right by your ear as he pressed down harder on your clit.
You whined, tears pouring from your eyes once more as he tore yet another orgasm from your weakened body.
Your fluids drenched his dick, soiling his pants as you came around him. Alastor all but tore your skin as he gripped you tight. His own pace finally picked up.
You felt him twitch inside you, before the hot feeling of his seed soothed your battered cunt. 
"Tell me, would that scum have let you cum like this?" Alastor whispered in your ear. He held you tightly, his head still at the crook of your neck.
"No," You responded weakly. You felt him twitch inside you again.
You tried your hardest not to think back to the poor sinner, ripped limb from limb in a blink of an eye. Their body likely still stomped down into the mud of the forest floor.
"Would any other wretched soul be able to give you what I give you?" Alastor asked again. He playfully nipped at your ear.
"No," You responded again.
"So who do you think can treat you, treasure you, best, my dear?" He pulled back, his smug smile loomed over you as he held your chin for you to keep his gaze.
"You, Alastor. Only you can treat me this good." The words were bitter in your mouth
You hadn't sold him your soul. And he would never ask for it.
But you were his and his alone, nonetheless.
"And don't you ever forget it." He mused, pushing you back down to the floor as he began to fuck himself inside of you again. His previous release slowly pushed out with every slow thrust.
"Be still for me, darling," He whispered sweetly. "Let me have my fill of you for now." 
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I don't usually write smut but this request sent me haywire. Hope I didn't disappoint, anon! I loved your demented request ♪
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koddlet · 3 months
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EDIT 10 FEB: i am no longer accepting these!! reblogs have been turned off to reflect this
hi! i'm offering drawings to anyone that donates an e-sim to gaza until 10th february. here is a tutorial on how you can do that, and you can look in the notes of this post for referral codes shared by other people for a discount.
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alternatively, you can donate to any one of these instead:
Pious Projects (twitter)
Help Gaza Children (proof of impact)
Care for Gaza (twitter)
Medical Aid for Palestinians (twitter)
Help Ahmed and his family evacuate (his account)
Help Mohamed and his family get medical help and evacuate (post)
Palestine Children's Relief Fund (twitter)
Anera (twitter)
Help a family of 13 evacuate
Urgent support for medical professionals
i know there are many others - if you have donated to one that isn't here, you can still send me a screenshot + link so i can add it to the list :]
i will only accept donations made from 26th jan onwards! send me a screenshot of your receipt with timestamps through DMs or email me at [email protected] (cover your personal details), along with the character you want. if they're from a fandom you haven't seen me draw for, a reference image would be greatly appreciated!
you can honestly donate just like a dollar or two to one of the fundraisers and i will still draw you something - it'll just be very simple! a donation is a donation and every little bit counts
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nouverx · 2 months
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Rosie is definitely the one who picked out Alastor's outfits. He doesn't have a bad fashion sense at all or anything. She just likes dressing her bestie up and won't take no for an answer.
YES SHE DOOOEES Alastor is her Barbie doll!! And yeah he’d probably be stubborn he loves his stripped coat but Rosie is so insistent that he ends up having to play along eheh. Also here's Alastor in a fluffy winter coat because I said so ❤
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shngrtto · 9 months
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twst requests from tiktok (part 1)
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likeprongstostars · 5 months
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pls pls im begging you ON MY KNEES bloody bodyguard james ill take whatever sketches or crumbs you have i need more of him
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i was giggling the whole time while drawing this... that shirt is holding for its dear life
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