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#report. the raven cycle
imminences · 2 years
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CHAR POSTERS. BLUE SARGENT
she was decidedly uncomfortable with the switchblade. although she very much liked the idea of it— blue sargent, desperado; blue sargent, superhero; blue sargent, badass— she suspected that the only thing she would cut the first time she opened it was herself.
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worteltje7 · 1 year
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“Headlights? That’s hardcore, Parrish.”
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exy101 · 2 years
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if adam parrish has a million fans i am one of them. if adam parrish has ten fans i am one of them. if adam parrish has one fan i am that fan. and i can’t remember the rest of this meme but it’s adam parrish day and i’m the happiest ive ever been
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fem-lit · 18 days
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“Quite simply,” writes Seid, dieters “are reacting the way victims of semi-starvation react … semi-starvation, even if caused by self-imposed diets, produces startlingly similar effects on all human beings.”
The range of repulsive and pathetic behaviors exhibited by women touched by food diseases is portrayed as quintessentially feminine, proof positive of women’s irrationality (replacing the conviction of menstrual irrationality that had to be abandoned when women were needed for the full-time work force). In a classic study done at the University of Minnesota, thirty-six volunteers were placed on an extended low-calorie diet and “the psychological, behavioral and physical effects were carefully documented.” The subjects were young and healthy, showing “high levels of ego strength, emotional stability, and good intellectual ability.” They “began a six-month period … in which their food intake was reduced by half—a typical weight reduction technique for women.
“After losing approximately 25% of their original body weight, pervasive effects of semistarvation were seen.” The subjects “became increasingly preoccupied with food and eating, to the extent that they ruminated obsessively about meals and food, collected recipes and cookbooks, and showed abnormal food rituals, such as excessively slow eating and hoarding of food related objects.” Then, the majority “suffered some form of emotional disturbance as a result of semistarvation, including depression, hypochondriasis, hysteria, angry outbursts, and, in some cases, psychotic levels of disorganization.” Then, they “lost their ability to function in work and social contexts, due to apathy, reduced energy and alertness, social isolation, and decreased sexual interest.” Finally, “within weeks of reducing their food intake,” they “reported relentless hunger, as well as powerful urges to break dietary rules. Some succumbed to eating binges, followed by vomiting and feelings of self-reproach. Ravenous hunger persisted, even following large meals during refeeding.” Some of the subjects “found themselves eating continuously, while others engaged in uncontrollable cycles of gorging and vomiting.” The volunteers “became terrified of going outside the experiment environment where they would be tempted by the foods they had agreed not to eat … when they did succumb, they made hysterical, half-crazed confessions.” They became irritable, tense, fatigued, and full of vague complaints. “Like fugitives, [they] could not shed the feeling they were being shadowed by a sinister force.” For some, doctors eventually had to prescribe tranquilizers.
The subjects were a group of completely normal healthy college men.
— Naomi Wolf (1990) The Beauty Myth
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drowninghell · 11 months
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Raphael x (oc) Riona
4in one challenge hosted by
@thelaundrybitch @leosgirl82 @turtle-babe83 @post-apocalyptic-daydream
I really really wanted to give this prompt list a go and I’m so excited! I hope it’s okay that I didn’t include the whole prompt but a lot of elements of it! Anyway! Hope you enjoy!
“ he’s going to kill you!” April chided, her mouth hung open in shock. “ I told you this was a bad idea right from the get go!” Riona clicked her tongue in dismissal, those emerald eyes flicking towards her raven haired accomplice. “ no he will not… and even then, technically he agreed to it.” She sounded semi sheepish - semi sure. The reporter rolled her eyes with such a drama that halted the veteran in her steps. Stoping And straightening the massive bike up. She had been rolling said motercycle down the sewer line , back towards the lair.
There was a silence between the two , either one waiting for the other to continue. Riona relented, “ how did he not agree?” April
Scoffed and continued walking. “
Come on, he was in his daily argument with Leo, I doubt he was even listening to a word you said.” Riona rolled her eyes before following her down the path , still on her head was her soulmates big helmet, the only thing keeping it in her substantially smaller head was the chin straps.
The closer she got to the lair, the more anxious she felt. Previously the smaller woman had asked Raphael could she borrow said bike to take to the shops instead of catching the subway across town. He agreed infront of everyone , waving her off in the most loving way he could before diving back into his argument with Leo. Surely having everyone else as witnesses would keep her covered, right? The main focus of her concern was the slight scratch that showed up on the chrome exhaust. She was sure it would buff out, it was that small that unless she pointed out it was hard to spy.
Upon entering the lair and parking the bike up beside the rest of their modified vehicles. “ Do you reckon he’ll really be pissed, I mean look at it.” Riona asked, a slight anxiousness easing into her voice. April, who was guilty by proxy for getting on the motor cycle with her crouched down to look at the hair line scratch. Riona turned her back to the rest of the lair as she watched April examine the metal.
“ do you reckon who will be pissed.”
That deep timbre vibrated through her like the best music ever. It never failed to give her those butterfly feelings in the pit of her stomach, however today, it was for all the wrong reasons. Not only did Riona jump
But April sprung to her feet also.
Trying to play it cool riona retreated so her back was against the bike and April used the distraction to clear.
“ naw , naw no one.”
Raphael stood to his full height , looking down his nose at his significant other, raising a quizzical brow bone. He never seen her like this, demure, shy even. The woman usually walked and carried herself with an air of majesty that demanded respect, so this was so out of character. He slowly folded his muscle lined arms across his chest before humming a “ mhmm.” Waiting for her to continue. She didn’t, so he took the cue to initiate.
“ why are you wearing my helmet. “
“ because I was riding your motorcycle to the shop.”
He was gobsmacked for a moment before continuing. Now, he adored riona, I mean, worshipped the ground she walked on. But his bike, well, that was his baby!
“ you did what now?”
“ you said I could so yeno.”
“ when did I sa-“ he halted himself mid sentence before having a vivid flash back to when she did indeed ask and he did indeed agree, still, didn’t explain why she was so antsy if he agreed.
Taking a step forward she automatically stepped back, being sure to shield the damaged area from his view. “ okay what did you do?”
She held her hands behind her back, her military training showing in her stance. “ what’s in your hand?”
“Nothing.” She defended , showing her hands.
“ then what did you do?”
“ why do you automatically assume I’ve done something?” Riona scoffed, feigning being defensive.
Raphael just evened the score with one of his scathing “ are you serious” looks. Already going to take another step forward, she matched his movements like a mirror, further shielding the motor cycle. Quickly he went the other way , yet again she matched him. He grinned roguishly , with such an amusement that only she could bring out of him. Before they knew it an all out doge fight broke out, Raphael losing his patience by the end of it and simply using brute strength to win, sweeping the brunette off her feet and flung haphazardly over his shoulder.
Before he could see the horror she relented, blurting out her confession “ okay please don’t be mad alright, there is a wee tiny, tiny scratch and I’ve no idea how it got there! Okay please don’t be pissed! I’ll buff it out or replace the chrome.” The words just poured out of her like a dripping tap, she could hold up under government level Torture but not the questioning of her darling dearest. Quickly he set her down, just as gently.
It was like a knife to the heart , a hand on his forehead. The melo drama of it. “ show me.”
And so she did, the big bara brought himself down onto his hunkers to get a good look, his thumb and forefinger holding his chin before he returned to his full height. The red clad turtle feigned thought and the longer he took the more anxious the ex marine became.
When he seen the anxiety showed itself on her face he slacked his fake tense body and slammed the visor down on his mask
With an almighty clap, taking the woman who was wearing the mask by complete shock “ that’s always been there numb nuts.”
She gasped straight away flailing to
Undo the chin strap. “ I Can’t believe you! I’ve been freaking out about that!” Pulling the helmet off her hair and tucking it under her arm.
“ the fact that that fits on your head is both disturbing and a turn on.”
With that comment it took everything in her to not throw that damn thing at him.
“ oh it turns you on eh?” She grinned wickedly , her voice as smooth as velvet, and just like that he was mush. It was too easy and she loved it. Setting the helmet down atop the bike as she walked up to him, hips rocking with each slow step. All he could do was gulp.
Her fore finger grazed the center of the ridges of his thick plastron, eyes flicking up to meet him. Side stepping him as she traced that finger along his shoulder in a overly sultry manner and he was living for it. It sent shivers down his spine and encouraged a deep churr to vibrate within his chest. God she loved that sound. Pressing an open mouthed kiss to his shoulder before waking away completely. He felt himself leaning into her hand.
It was an icey sobering moment when she retracted it all together , a whine/ groan leaving his lips as he spun around. “ ya driving me crazy.” She answered him with a simple wink which did nothing relieve the pressure already building in her stomach.
“ you heard, what are you gonna do about it.”
Never in his life did that man run as fast.
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spyral-out-keep-going · 10 months
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This week’s episode is bringing the threads together. It was fantastic and so much in 30 minutes.
Tense/sad/scary
Moss mentally breaking Barry
Gene falling back into his egocentric (default) mode. He dug his own grave with how he framed the story to the reporter but he doesn’t deserve what it looks like he’s going to get
Sally swinging wildly from manic to panic to breakdown to hallucination to flat affect
John 🥺 you don’t deserve to be caught up in this. I’m scared he’s going to get connected to Fuches and the cycle will continue.
Hank getting tough with Barry and the way he just pulled the wig off and said “Sally Reed”. Like I was proud and also scared of him for a second.
Barry shaking with rage facing away from the camera!!! I feel like a slaughter is coming and have no idea who is going to die.
Funny
Classic Noho Hank (most of the time)
FUBKs - all Hank’s comments - add to cart, make that 501, still a fox Edit to add: don’t be modest, that’s a lot of coups
The Raven’s murder crew discussion. (Reminded me of Ted Lasso soccer team himbos except darker)
Wil E Coyote rocket lol then Hank falling
Barry escapes (but was that too easy??) and the Christian rock ringtone
I have no idea what exactly is going to happen in the last episode, but Hank totally is going to send Barry to Fuches address tho right?
And for all the shifting of who wants to kill whom and the experiences they went through, they’re still kind of the same…but worse. So idk what it means for them at the end but there is no happy ending.
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mickeymagpie · 5 months
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20 questions for fic writers
Tagged by @marypsue, thank you!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
106 so far!
2. What’s your total word count?
321,819, which is somehow both lower and higher than i expected.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
a whole lot; most recently Rise of the TMNT, my fandom on ao3 with the most works is Rise of the Guardians. lots of rises.
4. Top 5 fics by kudos
The Gravity Falls trans dipper one-shot, the FMA Ishvalan!Elrics AU, an into the spiderverse fic, raven cycle pov outsider, and a star wars force awakens one-shot. i give all my fics long song lyric titles so that's all the info yall are getting lmao.
5. Do you respond to comments?
I always start out trying to respond to everything when i post a new fic, but then i get overwhelmed pretty quick. lo siento mucho.
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I don't usually go for angsty endings tbh! I like a lot of angst in the middle, or i go for kind of bittersweet endings.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
probably that star wars one; force awakens had just come out and i was one of many kylo ren woobifiers who wanted him to have accepted han's invite to come home.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
The most hate i've gotten is on a Different star wars fic where i made Luke trans and some people were Not happy. luckily, i have a permit (i can do what I want).
9. Do you write smut?
yeah lol. i don't post a lot of it though; most of the time i just share it with my discord friends.
10. Do you write crossovers?
all the time all the time babey.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
yes i've been notified 2 or 3 times that someone copied my stuff onto wattpad or ffnet. i usually go report them but don't care enough to follow up.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I don't think so? not that I can remember. I've had one or two podficced though iirc.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
nnnnot a finished one. my friends and i do a lot of half fic writing and half rp that usually doesn't turn into a polished product (but it's still fun <3).
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
ALL TIME FAVORITE FLYNN AND LUCY TIMELESS. i've never written fic for them and the show isn't even GOOD but god the way they look like "she fixed him" bs on the surface but really they're each so perfect to make up for the other's shortcomings. also i always wanted so badly for someone to tell her to get her dog on a leash <3
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?
ahaha,,,, the good omens roleswap fic is burning a hole in my document folder. i have an outline i just have no inspiration/motivation :(
16. What are your writing strengths?
characterization; particularly I've gotten the feedback that i'm good at writing characters in different circumstances from canon while keeping their personalities both Intact and Logically Justifiable.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
ending things, both in the sense that i start a lot of stuff and don't finish it, and the sense that i usually have too many ideas and don't know how/where to cut off a plot.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?
google translate always does me dirty so now i usually just write the dialogue in english and use a dialogue tag like "she said in *insert language*"
19. First fandom you wrote for?
iiiiii think it was Rise of the Guardians! before that i mostly did over-dramatic RP on the cricket magazine forums where i had characters like a half-dragon bounty hunter.
20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?
probably the ishvalan elrics fic! fma is already full of a lot of meaty concepts, and it was fun re-conceptualizing the canon plot and character beats while keeping the arching plot intact. stuff like that is like a puzzle to me, it's very satisfying when i finish one and it gets positive feedback!
tagging anyone who wants to do it, because im. so sleepy rn
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evenstarfalls · 1 year
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thought i had a pinned post but apparently i do not oops
sup i'm gail/evenstarfalls/whatever you wanna call me tbh (she/her). i'm in my 20s and when i'm not busy with college i blorbopost too much. i am a musician and i love reading and baking and drawing. i live in texas and i am biro ace/queer.
terfs and exclus and conservatives fuck off
i mainly post about books on this blog tbh although there are some shows i like.
DNI
I'd like to start off by saying this is a hard dni and I take it very seriously. If you attempt to break this I WILL KNOW and you'd best bet your ass is getting blocked and reported. Idc I don't want to see you on my blog and DNIs are not jokes but are meant to be taken seriously. Do not fucking interact with my if meet the following DNI criteria.
Eli Ever haters
Thanks for coming to my DNI
non exhaustive list of fandoms
villains (vicious and vengeful), renegades, the lunar chronicles, shades of magic, monsters of verity, these violent delights (nemerever), wwdits, heartstopper/osemanverse, grishaverse, legend, the young elites, the raven cycle (havent finished it but give me...a week?), throne of glass, rwrb, the folk of the air, cassidy blake, wings of fire, gail carson levine books, tiloalr, percy jackson...yeah that's enough listing
also phineas and ferb, the owl house, and miraculous. i'm more likely to post about those on my other blog, @dooffirmations but a few posts seem to find their way here.
i do have other social medias and a ve schwab discord server you can find on my linktree
my blog is very disorganized but #screaming into the abbyss is for vague ranting (pun intended, not a spelling mistake)
yeah that about covers it
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phoneybeatlemania · 2 years
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Do you think john had an eating disorder? I never know what to think but I trust your opinions
Hiya anon! Sorry I took all day answering this, I was just out with friends yesterday [NOT celebrating the queens jubilee, but by all means celebrating Prince Andrews POSITIVE covid test even if its probably a straight up lie cause convenient timing, huh. I hope he's unwell though.]
My opinion on this is that John clearly struggled with disordered eating habits throughout his lifetime—at times they were pretty bad (i.e during touring), and at other times they seemed virtually non-existent (i.e apparently he was pretty relaxed about food when he was with May Pang [disclaimer: have not read her book yet though, so Im going off of what Ive heard])—and I think both his disordered eating behaviours and mentalities were prevalent enough to constitute an eating disorder. Disordered eating and Eating Disorders are not the same thing, although I find the distinctions between the two to be somewhat trivial at times, since there is so much overlap between them; to me, the key difference between being a disordered eater and having an eating disorder is all about the mentality—i.e a person may under-eat in their day-to-day life, but they might not be struggling with anorexia as a mental illness if the ED mentality is not there. Both are still issues of their own, but different—although to reiterate, very susceptible to overlap.
I made a post on this topic awhile ago, and although I don’t think I outright disagree with anything I said in that post, I have been wanting to remake it for sometime now, because Im constantly coming across new tidbits of information that corroborate this. 
As I said in the post, I think John probably had EDNOS [or Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified], sometimes called OSFED [Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorders].
More below the cut!
Here’s the definition of EDNOS: 
EDNOS refers to eating disorders that display some of the characteristics of other disorders, such as anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa, but the behaviours of which do not fit the full criteria of these conditions.
Ednos consists of cycles of restricting food, then bingeing, followed by purging after feelings of shame and guilt. An obsessive nature and over awareness is common surrounding food, weight, and calorie control, where restricting and avoiding meals is another of the many symptoms.
Someone living with Ednos may have certain rules about the types of food they can or can't eat and at what times they believe they are allowed to eat. Behaviours such as using laxatives, vomiting, or over exercising are often expressed as a way of compensating for eating. Bingeing on large quantities of food is common, followed by a period of restrictive or purging behaviours. Ednos is massively under reported in the media but makes up for a large percentage of eating disorders worldwide. (x)
First off, I just want to take a second to address the rumour that John had bulimia. Im discounting this argument from my post, simply because it lacks any evidence to corroborate it, and overall seems to me like its the product of exploitative journalists more then anything else. For example, it was alleged in the book Backstagepass VIP by Debra Sharon Davis:
‘John and I were having a heart-to-heart,’ recalled Nilsson, who died back in 1994. ‘Then all of a sudden John went off about how powerful men had ravenous appetites and wanted to swallow the world whole. And he thought that was why he had this horrible problem – being hungry all the time and overeating. 'He said he often fantasised about large quantities of “forbidden” foods. He said food was “sacred” to him and it frightened him. He saw it as “a great weakness” and he referred to it as "a lack of discipline.”’ —Harry Nilsson, The Daily Mail 2012 (x)
If there is evidence to suggest that he struggled with bulimia I would of course consider it, but reading through articles like this one, even assuming the author is being truthful, theres still nothing to suggest he had a purging disorder specifically. 
So onto the specifics of John’s eating disorder. It seems to me that John found himself in a restrict/binge cycle throughout the touring months of 1965/66, and possibly before and beyond both these years, although theres less documented evidence to suggest as such. 
Here’s some documented behaviours John had surrounding food, that are all suggestive of an eating disorder:
This article:
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“John has a tendency to gain a little weight between bookings, and he goes above his natural weight of 159 pounds. Right before a tour, he’ll start doing everything he can to lose weight.”
“…while the tour is on is the best time to reduce [food intake]”
“He sticks to one meal a day—steak and a huge salad.”
“Because of his diet, John won’t look at bread. On the evening of our first night i’ll find myself ordering the sandwiches for the others and a salad for John, plus a couple a couple of meat sandwiches because I know what’s coming.”
“After about an hours drive, John begins to look at me apprehensively. He has hunger pains in his eyes! Finally when he is about to ‘break down,’ I reach into my valise and pull out the meat sandwiches. […] John takes the meat out of the sandwiches and eats every tiny sliver he can find. Then he stuffs the leftover slices of bread into a bag, which I take from him (so that he wont break down again and eat those).” 
“[Johns] main complaint is ‘How come Paul never gains an ounce—and he eats twice as much as I do?’ […] John is sure some kind of curse is set on his head—or his stomach as it were!”
“[John] has two sets of suits. One is for when he is normal weight, and the other is for when he trims down on tour. The worst part is I have to take a set of each on tour—just incase he gains or loses.”
— The Beatles and Me! by Neil Aspinall, 1965
[My Note: To me, this article seems the most crucial piece of evidence suggesting John was struggling with an ED that Ive come across so far. We have a document, written in real time, reporting on John showing very clear ED behaviours. The article literally states, “he sticks to one meal a day”, and then goes on to elaborate on John’s “break downs”, or what I would say are clearly binges (some might define a binge as being food-indulgence to an excess, although in my opinion when it comes to ED’s binges are more about feeling a loss of control around food rather then the actual quantity). 
Restrict/binge cycles I think generally get under-recognised by people, because the common perception of anorexics is that they never eat, and when they do eat, they eat very little. But I think the reality is, is that very few anorexics will tell you they never experience binge episodes; when you’re under-nourished, its the bodies immediate natural response, and inavoidable in the long run.
I think it’s just such a sad read to be honest, especially the line “he has hunger pains in his eyes!”, because he was literally inflicting torture onto himself, putting himself through all this pain when he didn’t need to.]
“When 'Help' came out in '65, I was actually crying out for help. Most people think it's just a fast rock 'n roll song. I didn't realise it at the time; I just wrote the song because I was commissioned to write it for the movie. But later, I knew I really was crying out for help. It was my fat Elvis period. You see the movie: He—I—is very fat, very insecure, and he's completely lost himself. And I am singing about when I was so much younger and all the rest, looking back at how easy it was. Now I may be very positive...yes, yes...but I also go through deep depressions where I would like to jump out the window, you know. It becomes easier to deal with as I get older; I don't know whether you learn control or, when you grow up, you calm down a little. Anyway, I was fat and depressed and I was crying out for help.”
— John Lennon interview w/ David Sheff, Playboy, 1980 (x)
[My Note: What I find most interesting here is the element of introspect John has within this interview, recognising in retrospect his own insecurity and hollowness during that period of his life. Also it touches on a point I will move onto later, in that his ED was probably might have been a manifestation of his own self-hate.
Also gives us insight into how much his own insecurities were really just in his own head, because very few people would have seen him as "very fat". Im aware our perceptions of fat/thin have changed a lot since the sixties, but even at the time, most people wouldn't have considered him overweight. I am also aware of the alleged "fat beatle" article that came out in 1965, but Ive been unable to locate an exact source for that, or a source in which John makes reference to it, so Im not sure how to feel about that. ]
“Poor old Orson [Welles], though, he was troubled. He goes on [The] Dick Cavett Show and he’s sort of ‘Please love me, I’m a big fat man now and I’ve eaten all this food and I did do well when I was younger and I can act, I can direct, and you’re all very kind to me but at the moment I don’t do anything.’”
— John Lennon interview w/ Jann Wenner, Lennon Remembers, Rolling Stone Magazine, 1970
[My Note: Anyone else getting a little sense of projection from this comment?]
“He was tired of being the fat Beatle. He was really in shape. We used to call John Skinny Head when he pulled his hair back in a ponytail and make his face look narrow. He did it that day for the video and he shouldn’t have. When he saw the results, he went crazy. He just hated it.”
— Jack Douglas, RecordCollectorMag (x)
[Jack] Douglas and Lennon would eat egg-whites. “He used to be the fat Beatle” that’s why there were egg-whites only Douglas explains
— Jack Douglas to NBC (x)
[My Note: Though not immediately suggestive that John was struggling with an ED, we aren’t looking at these things in isolation, were looking at the whole picture, and within that picture behaviours like this—minimising caloric intake, food “rules” that one must abide by—this does suggest an eating disorder.]
“January 15 1966. Wearing their swimming suits they paraded down the largely empty strip of sand and then sat on sun loungers while journalists posed rapid-fire questions. John hated the resulting photographs, because they revealed him to be flabby and overweight. As a result, he would lose fourteen pounds by the time of the summer tour.)”
— Beatles ’66 by Steve Turner (pg. 59)
[My Note: Turner is a questionable source here, in that Im unsure where he drew the information that John hated his appearance in the photographs from the holiday (not that I find this unlikely, but I haven’t found an external source stating that he did). But again, this aligns with his touring behaviours in Aspinalls writings in the previous extract, and as well with Johns 1980 comments.]
“After 28 straight days of shouting, screaming, sketching, and eating28 different colours of ice cream, John Lennon and Yoko Ono’s Primal Scream therapy sessions with Arthur Janov at this London offices are concluded. He recommends that the Lennons fly out to Los Angeles and resume their treatment at his Primal Institute Clinic in California.”
[…]
“[John] is now 28 lbs heavier than when he left England last April. When asked about this, John put this down to “eating 28 different colours of ice-cream” during his course of treatment with Janov.” 
— The Beatles Diary Volume 2: After the breakup 1970-2002 by Keith Badman & Barry Miles
“It was all very well for the mind but for the body it was terrible. I wore the same clothes for two years. I had two things: a jump suit, one you do the plumbing in. I had two of them. That’s all I wore for almost two years. Janov was an idiot but he was not bad. His therapy was good. He was a pain in the neck.” 
— John Lennon interview w/ Frances Schoenberger, A Day With John Lennon (c. 1975) (x)
[My Note: As aforementioned, I think at times John went through periods where his eating was disordered, though the eating disorder mentality wasn’t necessarily present, and this is what I would consider symptomatic of that. John evidently wasn’t eating well during this period of his life, but it seems an unhealthy habit rather then a period of binge eating.]
There's also the argument that Johns weight loss was in large part due to his drug usage, and I agree with that, especially when it comes to heroin since we closely associate the physical symptoms of that addiction with noticeable weight loss. But a theory that I also have on this is that John might have also been using drugs like LSD in order to lose weight during the mid-60s. Purely speculative, I know, but just a theory I have that I don’t think is inconceivable since LSD can cause a loss of appetite, disrupt eating patterns, and trigger binge eating episodes following a trip. Ive also heard of anorexics using it in order to suppress their appetites (in a similar vein to cigarettes being used as an appetite suppressant). 
Something I didn’t discuss in my original post is the argument for John having had orthorexia, which is characterised by an excessive preoccupation with eating healthy food. Ive been discussing this very recently with @damapajaro, and they’ve sent me some interesting sources that would corroborate this. Here are some extracts they’ve sent me, and some Ive found on my own:
November, 1980. John & Yoko are putting the finishing touches on 'Double Fantasy.’ […] One thing troubled me during the all-night recording sessions: the way John would slip from time to time into an adjoining lounge. The first thing that came to mind was drugs, because I was so used to seeing musicians pass around bowls of cocaine with the casualness of M&Ms. John had had drug problems earlier in his life, and I feared he had relapsed—despite all his talk about feeling healthier than ever. Maybe the pressure of being back in the studio was greater than he was letting on. At one point, I happened into the lounge and saw John at the far end of the narrow room. He was reaching for something on a cabinet shelf, and my first instinct was to go back into the studio so I wouldn't violate his privacy. But he spotted me and called me over, putting his finger up to his lips in a signal to be quiet. When I was next to him, he reached into the cabinet again and pulled out something wrapped in a towel.
"Want some?" he asked. "Just don't tell Mother" he said with a conspiratorial look. "She doesn't want me doing this anymore." As he opened the towel, I had to laugh. John Lennon's private stash turned out to be a giant-size Hershey bar. He broke off a chunk for me and one for himself. Holding his piece in a toast, John smiled and said, "Good to see you again.”
— Cornflakes with John Lennon by Robert Hilburn
“And while I wasn’t able to resist the temptation of sweets, John stuffed himself with nuts. That’s how he kept that figure slim and healthy: fighting his appetite with sunflower seeds, peanuts, pistachios or figs. He always said that the seeds were the best for health.”
— At John Lennons House by Rosaura Lopez
January 12, 1976, Sloppy Louie’s, New York City
We all got into John and Yoko’s limo. “What would you like to eat?” I asked them.
“We’re only eating fish,” John replied.
I asked the driver to take us to the nearby Fulton Fish Market area on the East River. After a short drive, he stopped in front of Sloppy Louie's, an area landmark.
— Lennon, The Mobster & The Lawyer by Jay Bergen
As Nanny's son Mike Cadwallader remembers, they confined themselves to expressive looks when Yoko commandeered their kitchens to prepare John's macrobiotic meals, and to surreptitious tut-tutting to each other about his drastically changed appearance. I overheard a lot of “He can't just eat beans…needs a proper meal…he's fading away…he's all skin and bones. The comments weren't necessarily anti-Yoko or pro-Cynthia, but just anti-anyone who got their hands on one of “their” children. When Mike's girlfriend, Linda, produced a bag of jelly beans…John's dietary principles wavered.He grabbed them and scoffed quite a few before being told off, his cousin recalls.
— John Lennon: The Life by Phillip Norman (pg. 610)
“After both John and Yoko suffered a severe bout of gastric flu, [they] went on a liquids-only diet for 40 days. ‘John’s way of keeping on the diet was reading cook-books and fantasising about the recipes,’ Bon Gruen remembers.‘He channeled all his craving for food into these amazing fantasies of dishes he’d never heard of, learning how to prepare them and what’s good for you and what’s not. Up till then he’d always thought getting a bowl of corn flakes was cooking’…Tormented by scents of warm bread during his diet, he even tried his hand at baking.”
— John Lennon: The Life by Phillip Norman (pg. 768)
If you look at the ways in which Yoko also speaks about dieting, it seems she’s got some odd food mentalities as well, also suggestive of orthorexia: 
John did not have an eating disorder. Sometimes he slipped and ate a bar of chocolate. His diets included vegetarian diet, macrobiotic diet and, very rarely a juice-only diet. All of the above are internationally approved health diets. — Yoko Ono to The Mirror, 2012 (x)
Its just a very strange outlook on food to have—to think that merely eating a chocolate bar, or “junk food”, is a mistake one has to recover from. All the different diets are also alarming; they might be internationally approved as being “health diets”, but as we understand from orthorexia, healthy doesn’t always mean healthy. Again, in my opinion when it comes to eating disorders it’s always more about the mentality than anything else. 
There also seemed to have been an element of enabling one-another’s bad habits here, especially in that Yoko was often controlling what John ate: “She doesn't want me doing this anymore.”…John Lennon's private stash turned out to be a giant-size Hershey bar; John's dietary principles wavered. He grabbed them and scoffed quite a few before being told off, his cousin recalls. Through Yoko, John found someone to encourage this issue, and this probably worsened the food-problems in that they were now being validated as "healthy"—or on the other hand, when he broke "food-rules" he was being "told off" for being unhealthy—ultimately perpetuating the pre-existent issue.
Her own relationship with food might also help us to understand why she-herself can’t recognise Johns ED. If Yoko can’t understand that her own intense dieting might be disordered in some ways, then it’s unlikely she’d be able to recognise that for another individual.  
So what prompted John to begin developing an eating disorder?
The obvious response to this is the ubiquitous: eating disorders are about control. When the eating disorder behaviours first started to take over (circa 1965), John had experienced an almost incomparable amount of fame. No ones surprised when a female celebrity reveals she’s struggled with an eating disorder, because being under public scrutiny for such an amount of time would unsurprisingly make you vulnerable to that—and the same seems applicable to John.
But I think as well it was probably a subconscious way in which a lot of his own self-hate manifested. Paul stated in an interview:
McCartney is quoted as telling Billboard: “[John] didn’t say, ‘I’m now fat and I’m feeling miserable.’ He said, ‘When I was younger, so much younger than today.’ In other words, he blustered his way through. We all felt the same way.”
“Looking back on it, John was always looking for help. He had [a paranoia] that people died when he was around. His father left home when John was three, the uncle he lived with died in later, then his mother died. I think John’s whole life was a cry for help.” — Paul McCartney in interview with Billboard (x)
It’ll come as a surprise to no one for me to say that John struggled with intense insecurities for the majority of his life, and so for him to use his physical appearance as a vessel to channel all his self-hate would make sense. As Jack Douglas said, ‘he was tired of being the fat Beatle’: tired of being judged, disliked, scrutinised. Or, thats my speculation at least. 
Conclusion:
I don’t know the extent to which John struggled with an eating disorder/disordered eating, although it was a pretty well-documented issue of his. 
To me it seems the initial problem was binging, which then turned into restriction/anorexia as a response to “fix” his weight gain, and then a restrict/binge cycle. 
In later years, I think he probably still struggled with this to some degree, although I think the issue became less about how much the food intake was, and more about what the intake was—effectively meaning, I think his anorexia unravelled into orthorexia. There was likely an element of enabling one another’s behaviours between John and Yoko here, and Yoko's own relationship with food likely encouraged John's pre-existing unhealthy patterns and mentalities.
I don’t think his eating disorder was prevalent at all times, since theres plenty of examples of John eating pretty normally with others, but that his eating disorder didn’t exist all of the time doesn’t really negate the argument that it did exist, because eating disorders aren’t necessarily linear. A person can go through countless phases of relapses and recovery throughout their life.
Anyway, as I say, Im constantly coming across new little pieces of evidence on this subject, so this post is far from comprehensive. But these are all some of the key things that immediately came to mind for me! If anyone has any further thoughts they’d like to share lmk :)
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rockstarrocky · 1 year
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IMAGINE: BURN OUT APPLE WHITE.
Apple’s gotten into her dream university, she achieved everything. Finishing a degree in engineering. All of that good stuff. But every time she has to do a lab, every report due. She stares at a blank screen. Her roommate, Briar, gets the feeling it’s something deeper than the constant all nighters just to achieve perfect GPA.
She barely sleeps, spending all night working. The next morning she has a lecture. Too bad she doesn’t actually remember what she learned. Mainly because Apple kept zoning out, she kept drinking coffee, but caffeine only could do so much. Her one day off, the day she planned to go hang out with Raven, just so they could catch up. Apple canceled, she slept until noon then drank iced tea and had a bagel.
It’s a cycle of sleepless nights and constant anxiety about school. Eventually she considers dropping out. Then she remembers what her future holds. A whole kingdom to run. A simple degree. (Even if it’s at the most important university in the kingdom) can’t stop her.
So what can?
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vocabulari · 11 months
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Listen guys I love the raven cycle I am such a fan I have spent many hours reading and contemplating this book and being in love with every character but I gotta say my favorite quote and the one that sticks out to me the most is. In the dream thieves between Maura and Mr. Gray of all people, when he pulls the 10 of swords and they say, “you’re going to have to be brave” “I’m always brave” “braver than that” I think about those words every gotdan day and they actually motivate me so much anyway all this is to say that today I am going on my first run since freshman year of high school! 6 years! I will report what Emotion I am feeling at the end ✨
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robbiefletcher · 1 year
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a steady stream of smoke. hands red from the cold. the tell-tale rattle of a chain-link fence. slipping between the cracks. vanishing into a crowd. being able to sleep anywhere. stealing every lighter you’ve ever been leant. a hooded jumper under a workman’s jacket. thinking on your feet. being smarter than anyone gives you credit for. breaking and entering. sneaking your hand into somebody’s pocket. having your own back. doing whatever it takes to ensure your survival.
statistics.
full name:  robert fletcher nickname(s):  robbie, rob, bobby name meaning:  bright fame age:  twenty-five date of birth:  october 6th star sign:  libra place of birth:  tower hamlets, london current location:  various boroughs, london gender:  cis-male pronouns:  he/him sexual orientation:  figuring it out (but can and does sleep with people of all genders) religion:  agnostic occupation:  pickpocket family:  alfie fletcher (father, estranged) deepti adama (mother, estranged) education level:  a handful of gcses (left formal education at sixteen) living arrangements:  homeless financial status:  poor spoken languages:  english
inspirations.
jess mariano (gilmore girls) james cook (skins) jim hawkins (treasure planet) patrick verona (10 things i hate about you) ronan lynch (the raven cycle) eggsy unwin (kingsman) the artful dodger (oliver twist)
biography. (tws for neglect, parental abandonment, poverty)
Born in Tower Hamlets (a very poor area of London) in 1997.
Robbie’s parents were both barely nineteen when he was born, and adults in name only.
After six months his father realised he wasn’t particularly suited to family life, and disappeared off into the great blue yonder, never to be seen again.
Robbie’s mother couldn’t cope alone. With no support system behind her, an infant son to raise and no money to speak of, the odds were stacked against her. She spent a lot of time away from Robbie, ostensibly trying to cobble together the rent for the derelict flat they shared, but typically going out in pursuit of her lost youth.
The police finally came when Robbie was five. A neighbour reported seeing him hanging around the tower block they lived in at all hours of the day and night, never at school and seemingly unsupervised.
He was taken into care that same day, and hasn’t had any contact with either of his parents since.
He was fostered a few times in his early days in the system, but never for longer than a few months, and he always ended up right back at the group home. He was troubled, and he made trouble wherever he went.
In spite of this, he was obviously a clever boy, but categorically refused to try at school. He learned to read far later than his peers, but when he did, he scoured every book in the care home twice over.
Robbie started stealing as early as ten. First little things, sweets and magazines from the corner shop, but bigger when he realised he could get away with it. Some of the stuff he stole he’d resell to his peers on the playground, and then on street corners and down alleys as he got older.
Once you reach a certain age, it’s practically a given that nobody’s going to adopt you. But that was fine with Robbie, he didn’t need or want new parents, he was fine by himself.
He finally left care at eighteen, with a job as a waiter and a room at a halfway house until something more permanent could be arranged.
To start with, he really did try going straight, becoming an upstanding member of society, but what was the point? You broke your back all day for nothing, while other people felt entitled to treat you like a dog.
He was back to his old tricks in less than a year. He left the halfway house and his terrible job and didn’t look back, calling the city of London in its entirety his home, and robbing strangers to get by. He’s always said that possession is a matter of perspective, and it seemed that way now more than ever.
He’s been on the Jolly Rogers’ books (such as they are) for about five years. He’s very good at what he does, but he tries to keep his head down as much as possible - after all, what kind of thief likes to draw attention to themselves?
other things.
Robbie is passionate about urban exploration, and knows the best ways into almost every abandoned building in London. It's come in handy more than once.
When it comes to his work, there's no better opportunity to pick an unsuspecting idiot's pockets than at a tube station during rush hour. With nearly three hundred of them across six zones, he's spoilt for choice, and rarely has to hit up the same place twice in quick succession.
He hasn't had a fixed address since he was eighteen, though he can usually find somewhere to get his head down for a night or two - whether it's a friend's floor, the back of a city bus, or the bed of a one night stand, Robbie has developed a knack for being able to fall asleep anywhere.
Robbie smokes like a chimney, and thinks vaping is genuinely one of the most embarrassing things a person can do.
All his worldly possessions fit into one duffel bag. Sentimentality is a luxury.
The cinema is his happy place, and he does his best to see as many new releases as possible, regardless of what the film is about or what the reviews are like. His favourite film of the last year was Everything, Everywhere, All At Once, which he actually paid to see a second time.
As of writing this, Robbie has never been in love. Any relationship he’s been in (though “relationship” is a strong word to describe Robbie’s fleeting entanglements) has been based on what the other person can do for him, rather than any reciprocated feelings on his part. Men like him aren’t made for soft things, and if the dynamic starts trending that way, he’s quick to nip it in the bud.
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tvdoes · 1 year
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Zonnia Pokedex: Passhair and Passtyle
Passhair
Growing Pokemon Grass Makuhita + Gossifleur
Appearance
Passhair are small Pokemon, two and a half feet in height, whose bodies are entirely covered in thick green vines that emerge from the crown of their heads. These vines are thick and lumpen, bending over under their weight and occurring in such number that they completely obscure the Pokemon's body, leaving Passhair appearing as a shambling mound of greenery.
Beneath the vines, should they all be stretched out and supported to reveal the Pokemon beneath, Passhair have round, yellow-skinned bodies, and are bipedal Pokemon with two feet and two hands. The Pokemon have eyes and a mouth, but no nose. The eyes are round and circular when open, and glow yellow when seen through the vine covering, but are kept closed when the vines are not covering them, as they are sensitive to light due to being used when mostly obscured. The mouth of Passhair is wide across its face.
The hands of Passhair have no defined fingers, ending in rounded nubs with a rough grasping ability. The feet split into two toes each. The Pokemon have a large orange circle on each cheek, and green leafy cuffs and collar around their wrists and neck.
When seen normally, Passhair appear as a roaming mass of green vines, which emerge from the top of the mass and hang down around it. The front of Passhair has just enough spread in the vines for two circular glowing yellow eyes to be seen within it.
Ecology
Passhair can be located throughout the Zonnia Region - anywhere soil nutrients, water, and sunlight can be found. The Pokemon roam freely, and can travel significant distances in the course of their lifetimes. All they seek is sustenance, and so they will go from place to place in search of sufficient food.
Passhair feed through their vines, which stretch out from their body to stick into the ground or water in search of nutrients. When the sun is out, the vines will grow more active, and puff out to increase their exposed surface area. While the Pokemon has a mouth and digestive system, and can eat food - with a preference for fruits and plants - the sustenance absorbed by its vines sustains Passhair entirely.
While they most commonly drain nutrients from nature, Passhair's vines can also absorb life energy from targets, and in any fight Passhair will wrap their opponents in their vines and drain energy from them until their opponent cannot fight back. Most Passhair will then return to regular feeding cycles, but some acquire tastes for the energy of others, and act in more predatory ways - actively attacking other Pokemon it can overcome and drain.
The actual amount of control the body beneath the vines has over its vines is imprecise. Aside from lashing out at attackers - and even then the movements of the vines appears to be more instinctively seeking the moving target than controlled - Passhair's vines mostly seem to act autonomously.
Passhair evolve into Passtyle after reaching a critical point of feeding - a long enough period of continuous absorption of energy into their vines that the plants undergo a metamorphosis, after which they no longer have the same ravenous need for sustenance. This takes a significant amount of time and feeding, however it has been discovered that this evolution can be brought about by exposing a Passhair to a Leaf Stone, with the energies from that stone triggering the same metamorphosis within Passhair's vines.
Field Report
Passhair and their evolution originated in the Yuracha Thornlands, during the time of the Kani. The use of Intercession to maintain the Yuracha as a verdant garden allowed the sustenance of a population of Passhair, who evolved into Passtyle with little difficulty and then provided the fruits of their evolved form to the Kani people who raised them.
After the dissolution of the Kani Empire and end of the use of Intercession, the Yuracha became unable to support Passhair further, forcing the Pokemon to set out in search of sustenance elsewhere. Due to a surprising resilience to hot and cold, Passhair have no difficulty settling anywhere their vines can dig into soil and fresh water, but they won't stay in one place for long before setting off to find somewhere new. The Pokemon are most common by far in places of heavy plant-life such as the Zonnia Basin, but can be found almost all over Zonnia, from as far south as the outskirts of Chalurin City, growing amongst the snow, to the slopes of Zonnia's mountains, volcanic or not.
Providing a Pokemon Trainer can provide them an environment of sunlight, fresh water, and continuous nutrients, Passhair are quite happy to be captured Pokemon. When not sustained properly their vines may entangle nearby living beings, Pokemon or human, but such is a mark of the Trainer's failing, not the Pokemon's. While their ability to drain energy in theory makes Passhair an effective battler, the Pokemon's focus on growth means that battle is counter-productive to it for the most part. Thus most Trainers with a Passhair won't actively bring it to battle.
Given the need to use a Leaf Stone to evolve Passhair in any reasonable time-frame, Passhair are not a common battling Pokemon, despite their common presence across Zonnia. More often Passhair are raised by gardeners and fruit farmers, who seek to harvest the fruits that grow from Passhair's evolution, Passtyle.
While the body of Passhair can be seen beneath its vines, the Pokemon is uncomfortable with being exposed, and so prefers to let its vines remain hanging loose, obscuring its body.
Follow the source link to AO3 to learn about the evolution of Passhair: Passtyle!
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meiakrp · 2 years
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E N T E R I N G  C O D E  N A M E . . . AGENT SEBASTIAN YOUR IDENTITY HAS BEEN CONFIRMED. WELCOME HOME, AGENT. 
Agent Sebastian has been appointed team leader of RAVEN. 
ACTION REQUIRED ;  Please follow and welcome your fellow agent.  
A demon has you and your team cornered. Your medic is down and you’re running out of energy. You notice that there is a way to escape but it would mean leaving your team. What do you do? Be honest.
RESPONSE RECORDED BELOW.
his mind whirs, cycling through all of their mistakes, and all of the ways to move forward. mostly the latter, because in the middle of battle, there’s no room for distractions or letting your mind wander. you need to be present, and attentive, anticipating the next move, preparing for it every second.
but he can’t help but wonder what he did wrong, because this shouldn’t happen. it’s just one demon, and yet it won’t go down. their medic is incapacitated, and the demon looks no worse for wear. have they gotten more powerful? he’ll need to let jinx know about this immediately, and maybe report to maylin directly once this fight is done.
if they make it out. the situation looks grim; the more they fight, the more escape routes they lose, the demon slowly backing them into a corner. seb quickly takes note of the surroundings again, looking for anything to use to their advantage, and--
there’s a crack in the stone fence to their right, part of it destroyed. the kids will be able to make it through the gap. seb knows this. they can escape.
“hey. the tall fence to our right. did you notice that hole in it? go. i think only one of you can fit through at one time but you trained for moments like this. you can be fast. and once you’re through, run back toward meia. don’t wait for me. just go.”
they hesitate. one of them protests. “hey, this is one of the times you need to actually listen to me,” and it almost sounds like a joke. maybe it is. maybe something a little light-hearted in this heavy situation will let his team breathe a little easier-- make room for the inhale they need to sustain them through their escape.
“go. i will be fine. i used to do solo work all the time,” he reminds them. “i’ll distract the demon.”
he doesn’t know if it will work, but doubt doesn’t get anything done, and it certainly doesn’t help the others. he is their leader and he will stand strong.
finally, they listen, and once one of them makes a break for it, the others follow. the demon turns to pursue them.
“come on you ugly fuck,” seb shouts to distract it, shooting the demon in head. why isn’t this killing it? what is going on?
“don’t you know who i am?” seb taunts. “i’m the one you want. maylin loves me. losing me? that would be a big blow to meia and you know it.” does seb really believe that? not quite, but it might be easy enough to sway a demon. he’s sure he’s of some value to them, even if only because they all watched him grow up. they would mourn him, surely.
he doesn’t want to put them through that.
it’s enough to get the demon to focus on him instead, and he still has a little bit left in him. he needs to kill the demon eventually, but for now, he can get away with just stalling it and giving his team the chance to get far away from here. that’s most important.
it lunges at him, and he dodges successfully, but now his positioning is even less ideal. still, he shoots at it. surely enough shots will kill it eventually, right? maybe kaiser’s experiments found a way to build demons with skulls made out of titanium. wouldn’t that be something?
his gun clicks.
click. click. click.
“fuck,” he mutters. he’s out of ammo.  
he tosses the gun to the ground and unsheathes the knife attached to his belt just in time for the demon to charge again.
he should’ve told the kids he was proud of them.
do they know?
he hopes they know.
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halothief · 2 years
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a fresh start would be good for you, renee had whispered in his ear as she tucked secrets between his scars. a new university on the other side of the country after it hadn’t worked out with the trojans stateside. a new university without an exy team, without publicity, without pressure. jean’s been here two weeks now, and can already sense the otherness of it, thanks to all of his newfound free time. he hasn’t stopped running, hasn’t stopped spending hours shooting puck into net when he cannot trick his body into sleeping, but he has stopped being ignorant to the world outside of the sport that almost killed him.
hence, there’s some kind of wrongness at belgrave university. wrongness not too dissimilar to riko moriyama and his hell-reign. there are ravens here, if not by name, by nature. it rattles deep in his bones.
basic mind-mapping led to two names that seemed ever-present in reports of strangeness, two names identified commonplace; vera stone and hamish blake. of the two, hamish’s felt the least intimidating. he’d seen vera around the campus, and knew there was raven in her too. so hamish it was, the one jean approached fearlessly in the late afternoon, knocking on his t.a. office door. 
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   ‘ there’s a cult here, isn’t there? ’     about as unforgiving as a forest-fire, those words, all tact lost to impatience. a fresh start would be good for him, renee had said. but what if this fresh start was simply a repeated cycle?    ‘ don’t lie to me. too many people have died, and i know a thing or two about power structures. enough to see there’s one here. maybe even two. i can’t figure out if you and vera are working together. ’
- ̗̀  @apocaelypse​ : hamish duke  ̖́ -   /  sc.
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othernaut · 6 hours
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The dungeon ecologist druid would be insufferable in the sewer level. You're just trying to concentrate on breathing through your mouth and keeping your spell components unbefouled, and all the while...
"You know, it's a common misconception that otyughs are inherently hostile. They're territorial, but they'll back down once they sense that their nest isn't threatened. It takes a lot of energy for an otyugh to move around, actually. They prefer picking a spot with plentiful sewage flow and would ideally remain inanimate their entire lives."
"It's weird that we've been seeing so many vargouilles down here. They're infernal creatures, yeah, but they're opportunistic parasitoids and they don't survive well outside of the hellish ecology. Without a constant source of humanoid bodies to kiss, a colony typically dies out within a few weeks. Wonder if the Thieves' Guild has been dumping corpses down here again."
"Oh, hey, don't let your crawling hand familiar back on your shoulder just yet. He's caught rot grubs, I'd say about ten minutes back. Fascinating creatures, really. They're harmless to the undead, but once they sense body heat, they instinctually burrow towards a heartbeat. Just get him to stand still for a minute while I heat up this dagger. You know that most reports of zombification passing through bites are actually mislabeled rot grub infestations?"
"Oh, haha, yeah, don't mind the dire rats, just keep moving. We're in their house right now, they just want to know that we're not moving in. Did you know that there averages seven rats for every person in any given city? Just think: Ten feet under any street it's just solid rats. It's a credit to the Sanitation Guild that they don't come up the privy more often, really."
"A cave fisher! That's a rare one for this environment. They're Underdark creatures - they usually don't like environments with as much noise and flowing water as this. This little guy must be so confused, either that or most of the way to deaf. Try not to snap the filament when you wriggle free. Poor little guy is probably hunting by sense of touch alone."
"You know, you'd be surprised how much cultists contribute to the local ecology. Having a reliable source of heat and light, like devotional candles, can provide crucial energy to the lower level flora which are the backbone of the entire ecosystem. It's easy to think of the cultist as an invasive species, but they're part of the nutrient exchange between the sewer and the surface world. Oh, don't worry about killing them, a den is rarely left uninhabited for long. Look, you can still see the old hate-sigils of the Ravening Darkness! The cycle of nature is a beautiful thing."
"Ooh, that's a carrion crawler! Hold still, I... Ah, guess you don't have much of a choice in the matter. But look on her underside. She's carrying eggs! And quite a large crop of them, at that. These guys are scavengers, actually, they rarely actively hunt, but once those eggs hatch they're going to consume her for nutrients, so she's under a real evolutionary pressure to bulk up as much as she can right now. Once you regain use of your arms, try to aim away from the thorax. The eggs will do just fine if she's already dead a little."
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