#please don’t take this seriously | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Tumblr posted its first advertisements in May 2012 and subsequently earned $13M in revenue.

#please don’t take this seriously

cappychino · 1 month

Text

sakizuke // diary of a wimpy kid

#please don’t take this seriously #hannibal #hannibal lecter #bedelia du maurier

8K notes · View notes

i-d-e-g-a-f · 5 months

Text

reminder for all those who celebrate!

zack and cody’s reservation is at 7:30 CENTRAL EUROPEAN TIME (they are in italy) so if you wish to celebrate as accurately as possible, remember to account for your time zone!

me personally, i will be celebrating at 1:30 PM

#please don’t take this seriously #i beg #i mean i will be celebrating at 1:30 that is true but i do not actually expect anyone else to do so #i am simply autistic #zack and cody #suite life of zack and cody #suite life on deck #november 16 2023

406 notes · View notes

madamemaddy · 7 months

Text

please enjoy my brand new original story :) it’s called “sebastian gets scammed”

hope you enjoyed xoxo

#please don’t take this seriously #kuroshitsuji #black butler #grell sutcliff #grelle sutcliff #sebastian michaelis #ciel phantomhive #o!ciel #ronald knox #elizabeth midford #lizzy midford #lizzie midford #rian stoker #kuroshitpost

522 notes · View notes

nyaagolor · 7 months

Text

AA prosecutors and main villains ranked based on whether or not I think they’re homophobic

Klavier: No, and he’s extremely loud about it because it makes Kristoph really mad. You would think he’s slept with dozens of people before bc of his job but he’s actually such a perfectionist that he’s never actually gotten any action. He respects the hustle tho

Von Karma: No, it’s funnier this way. He thinks ur beneath him on principle, gayness has nothing to do with it

Simon: He’s not but his bird is

The Phantom: I’m not convinced he has any opinions beyond what’s required of him, but Bobby Fulbright owns no less than 4 shirts that say “JUSTICE DOESN’T DISCRIMINATE” on big rainbow letters so I think the phantom is an ally by default for the brief time we knew him

Godot: When asked for his stance on gay rights he gave an answer that lasted 20 minutes and misquoted no less than 6 philosophers. Turns out the entire answer was him complaining about Lana Skye and didn’t answer the question whatsoever. Jury’s still out but Maya swears Mia told her he was bisexual

Franziska: Yes but it’s bc she’s a lesbian with the world’s worst coping mechanisms. Realizing she was crushing on a girl in boarding school was the start of her villain arc and I think she needs to go to a gay bar immediately

Edgeworth: Yes but only to himself

Kristoph: Yes to everyone BUT himself

Dahlia: Yes but for gay men specifically bc they’re harder to manipulate. Women are fine. I think she’s a misandrist also. She reads toxic yuri

Matt Engarde: He’s the world’s most bisexual looking straight man. He lets a homophobic remark slip in an interview and then makes an apology video about it. Despite being homophobic I think he would have tried queerbaiting his fans on multiple occasions

Morgan: She’s an ally but only to Maya because she wants the main bloodline to die out and that’s way easier if Maya is a lesbian. It was only after the matchmaking failed for the 12th time that she finally gave up and pivoted to murder

#please don’t take this seriously #ace attorney #mod vex

419 notes · View notes

bunny-is-cute · 1 month

Text

Angel: *holding baby spider kittens in his arms being a proud papa* Say hi daddy!

Husk: *looks at one of the kittens in particular with all white fur*

Husk: Who’s goddamn white baby is that?

Angel: This is your baby. He’s just light furred

Husk: *looks at other two kittens in Angel’s arms* Those two might be mine. Those two right there. But just because they look Husk, don’t mean they belong to Husk. But I don’t care what this baby looks like because this baby is rice-furred but not light furred.

Angel: *turns to the doctor* How strong were the drugs you gave him for his c-section?

Doctor: Oh very strong.

Husk: *recovering from c-section sedation after he gave birth to the kitten-spiders and is rambling like a madman*

Angel: I see…

#hazbin hotel #fanfiction #fanfic #hazbits #mentions of mpreg #surgery recovery #drug-implied #sedation #husk #hazbin hotel husk #huskerdust #angel dust #hazbin angel dust #hazbin anthony #this is just a joke #please don’t take this seriously #mpreg #husk was the pregnant one

112 notes · View notes

steddiealltheway · 2 months

Text

(IMPORTANT NOTE: this was supposed to be ABSOLUTE CRACK for Ruth’s birthday ((happy birthday @kurtkankle)) but this Heartstopper x Steddie Stranger Things crossover turned out to be surprisingly wholesome at the end. SO if you want to completely ignore the crack, replace Dart with Mews and… maybe it’s better. And Ruth… you’re the only person who could get me to post this instead of keeping it in my drafts.)

Charlie goes to Nick’s house, thinking only of his strong rugby arms. Instead, he’s greeted at the door by a pet that isn’t Nellie.

“Nick. What the fuck is this?” Charlie asks, bewildered at the creature weaving it’s way through nick’s legs.

Nick smiles and picks the creature up. “This is my cousin’s pet, Dart. I’m taking care of him for the next week.”

As if the creature knows that Nick is talking about him, it unhinges its multiple jaws and screeches.

Charlie stares at it for a few moments before deciding that maybe he can go without Nick for the next week. But then he sees someone come into view over Nick’s shoulder.

“I’m Steve,” the hottest American man Charlie has ever seen says, sticking his hand out toward him.

“H-hi,” Charlie responds taking his hand back and shaking it.

“I hear you’re Nick’s closest rugby lad,” Steve says with a big, clueless smile.

Charlie laughs nervously. “Yep, that’s who I am.”

Nick stares at him awkwardly and invites him inside. Charlie takes one glance at Dart and hopes he doesn’t bite his face off. Luckily, he keeps to himself and follows Steve into the living room as Charlie and Nick got to Nick’s room.

They “study” for about an hour before the door slowly creaks open, and in comes Dart excitedly. But then Steve follows him quickly, bashfully looking up at Nick and Charlie who haven’t had time to untangle themselves from each other.

Steve looks between the two and smiles softly. “You two remind me of me and my good friend Eddie.”

Charlie and Nick glance at each other and silently debate asking Steve more. Nick is the first to speak up, “Steve, are you and Eddie… dating?”

Steve scoffs. “No, we’re just really good pals.”

“Who… kiss sometimes?” Charlie asks, confused.

Steve nods with a big smile on his face.

Nick sits up and crosses his arms. “Is this… an American thing?”

Steve shakes his head. “No, no. This is a me and Eddie thing.”

Charlie nods and leans over to Nick whispering, “And how do you know him, again?”

“He’s practically my cousin’s older brother. He’s staying here while Dustin stays with the rest of his friends.”

Charlie nods, still confused about the situation, before returning his gaze to Steve. “Steve… do you… think about kissing him often?”

“All the time. It’s my ‘Roman Empire’ as Dustin says.”

Nick and Charlie exchange another look before Nick squeezes Charlie’s shoulder and says, “I got this.”

Charlie watches as Nick carefully approaches Steve and puts a gentle hand on his back, leading him down the hall and prompting, “So, tell me more about your friend Eddie.”

Charlie sits back and glances to his right where Dart is curled up on the floor next to Nellie, wondering if this tops the most confusing moment of his life, ranking even above getting Nick Nelson as a boyfriend.

A few minutes later, he wanders down the stairs, easily picking up on the conversation.

“I’m… in love with Eddie?”

Nick is quick to say, “I’m not saying you are, I’m just telling you it’s okay to like both men and women. But maybe you are in love with him.”

There’s a brief silence before Steve says, “I think I am.”

Charlie peaks around the corner where Nick is sitting at the dining room table across from Steve, with a small smile on his face. “I know it can be confusing, but think on it over the next week. And I’ll be here if you have any questions.”

Steve runs a hand through his hair and leans back in his chair. “God, I miss him.”

“I can’t imagine going a week without seeing Charlie.”

Charlie’s heart skips a beat at the comment, and he wonders if he should stop intruding on this moment.

“So you two are… going out?” Steve asks carefully.

“Yeah, we are,” Nick answers with a proud smile.

Steve smiles back, a look of contentment settling over his face as if realizing if Nick and Charlie could do it, so could he.

Charlie steps on a creaky part of Nick’s house, and the two glance up at him. Nick holds him arm out invitingly and Charlie is quick to join him in the offered embrace.

Steve runs his hands over his face and laughs, “I can’t believe I didn’t realize it before. Robin has been giving me looks for weeks, and I haven’t been able to read them. She kept telling me she couldn’t tell me what it was about until I realized it for myself. It all makes sense now.”

“And Robin is…?” Charlie asks.

Steve smiles brightly and is quick to ramble about his best friend, and Charlie shares stories about Tao in return.

Eventually, Steve’s phone starts buzzing, and he’s quick to excuse himself, cheeks turning red as Eddie Instagram handle lights up his phone.

As he walks away, Nick and Charlie glance at each other again and smile gently. Nick laughs, “Do you think that’s how people saw us when we were first getting together?”

Charlie smiles. “I think we may have been much worse.”

“Or much better honestly.”

Down the hall, they hear Steve argue, “Yes, I know you don’t have an international phone plan. I’ll pay for your bill. Yes it’s important! No, it’s not the kids. No it’s- Eddie. Eddie, I’m in love with you!” There’s a pause and a heavy sigh before Steve continues, “You are not buying a plane ticket to London when you can afford an international phone call. This is not a debate!”

Nick squeezes his arms around Charlie and whispers, “Yeah, we were definitely better.”

“Why are they like this?” Charlie laughs.

Nick laughs in response as they continue listening to the disastrous conversation, glad that they helped someone else have their similar happy ending.

#please don’t take this seriously #steddie crack #Heartstopper crack #steddie #nick and charlie #stranger things crack

97 notes · View notes

swirlymark · 4 months

Text

Some shitpost doodles while I recover from art block

#my fav rare pair #weskerberg #albert wesker #karl heisenberg #resident evil #my art #sketch #shitpost #please don’t take this seriously #LMAO

117 notes · View notes

skidcd-megamix · 7 months

Text

AU I MADE UP ON THE SPOT‼️‼️‼️ basically Amy is now trapped somewhere idk her consciousness is uploaded to the web and needs to find a way out (she also lost her memory) and metal is there to guide her cuz this is metamy. Side note Amy can swap out her hands and each new hand has a specific upgrade

Think of octo expansion

DAY 3 ALTERNATE UNIVERSE

#amy rose #metal sonic #fanart #sth #metamyweek30th #teehee #sonic au #i just made this up #please don’t take this seriously #lol

98 notes · View notes

bangzhasanxiety · 6 days

Text

Buck: Yeah I look at hot guys’ asses, yeah I kissed a man, went on a date with him, can’t stop thinking about him everyday all day. Yeah I’m just an ally. We exist.

#911 abc #evan buckley #talk Valentina!!!#ALLY!!#god i love him #I love a baby bi #please don’t take this seriously #give him a chance he’s new to this #buck the ally we never knew we needed

35 notes · View notes

blustarpilot · 1 month

Text

I’m sorry but I need to rant. I cannot believe this is happening in our modern society today right now in this house. *back of the hand swings to my forehead dramatically*

How is it possible that you can only smooch your spouse in Cult of the Lamb only once per day.

Only. Once. Per. Day.

And your in game spouse has the audacity to say that “Sorry hun, but you only get to kiss me once per day. I don’t make the rules, also u suck. Byeeee”

Like I only want to my Lamb to kiss Narinder every time I see him, is that too much to ask.

#please don’t take this seriously #cult of the lamb #cotl

31 notes · View notes

janeicethesiren · 4 months

Text

Sebastian Michaelis Headcanons

Hello! Long time no see! Sleep isn’t speaking to me right now so I thought I’d do some headcanons for our favorite demon; Sebastian!

Disclaimer: These headcanons are based on my interpretation of Sebastian’s character from the manga (what I’ve read so far), and just some miscellaneous things I think about sometimes. This isn’t meant to be a serious character analysis, I’m just having fun!

Warnings! ⚠️‼️⛔️ Mentions of R/pe and SA; Sexism and Racism, it’s near the end don’t worry.

——————————————————————————

“Sebastian” The Demon Headcanons

Ok, so it seems like Sebastian the demon is a very different person from Sebastian the butler. And there are some things about him that I don’t quite understand yet, so these are my headcanons based on what I’ve seen.

He has said that his true form is ugly and grotesque, and I don’t disbelieve him. However, if I’m not mistaken, before meeting with o!ciel, he seemed to have already taken on a somewhat human like appearance that’s not very different from the beautiful man we see today. I can believe that he automatically took on a human form to ease o!ciel’s mind; it’d make sense. But I still believe personally that:

The beautiful man we see is just as much a part of his “true form” as the mass of goo he’s shown as at the beginning.

I believe he can shapeshift into any form he wants, based on his quote, “I am no one, yet I can be anyone.” But I also believe he has a “default human form” in the same way he has a “default bird form” and possibly a default form in the demon realm, too. I just think it’s weird that whenever he changes his human form before the contract, he never changes his face, height, skin, or even his gender, which is interesting. Just his clothes. Why?

Secondly, I think “Sebastian” the demon does have a gender. Let me clarify, it’s not so much that he’s like a human where he was born a certain gender, but it’s more like, he has a sort of preference for how he shows up? If that makes sense? For example, demons in the kuro world could be inherently genderless, however; it could be possible that some demons could have preferences or even biases based on lived experiences in the human world. To elaborate, Sebastian has seen first hand how most humans are typically more trusting and differential towards men. Particularly tall, handsome, white men. So therefore, he typically prefers to show up in that form for most contracts as this allows him the most freedom, and lowers most people’s guard, generally speaking.

Some stereotypes, good or bad, could be highly advantageous for certain demons depending on the way they like to handle their contracts.

Sebastian’s True Personality Headcanons

We all know what Sebastian is really like at his core. He’s narcissistic, sadistic, arrogant, selfish, and heartless. But I have a few headcanons to add to that wonderful personality of his.

I feel like, outside of his butler persona, or in his thoughts, Sebastian can actually be quite childish and whiny at times. I think this is kind of funny because he criticizes his master for this all the time but I don’t think he’s much different. Sebastian has no qualms about working hard, for sure, and while he likes battling with his master, he also doesn’t like to be undermined or looked down upon. He gets very miffed when people don’t like him, and he’ll whine when he’s not given enough attention. Of course this is much more subtle within his butler persona, but it’s still there. I feel we see this most blatantly when interacting with characters like Nina Hopkins.

He can be quite the brat himself too, which is also funny. It’s rare, but those moments when he’ll complain, or mock his master in his head for his orders, or his extremely passive aggressive, pedantic behavior, particularly at the beginning of the contract. And his whole thing about everything needing to be perfect and beautiful all the time even outside of the contract, lol he’s just as much of a brat as his master! A match made in hell, truly. (Not in a ship way!!!)

I may do a separate headcanon list for this later but I feel like Sebastian would be the worst friend/partner ever. He’d be such a headache. Any friend or partner of his would have to: measure up to incredibly high standards at all times, would need to deal with his constant need to be the center of everything, would have to listen to him complain and possibly be subservient to him as he sees himself as a king (another headcanon based on the ice king short story). He’d be very controlling and wishy washy with affection (only wanting affection on HIS terms), probably would have no respect for any possible boundaries you may have, would subject you to constant psychology abuse, if you’re good at something he’ll try to upstage you as often as possible, won’t listen to a thing you say because he thinks he knows best (due to his arrogance), it’d SUCK! Very, very bad friend/partner material. :(

Sebastian Michaelis: Biases and Sexuality

I don’t think Sebastian would necessarily have biases in the sense of like: thinking men are better than women or white people are better than everyone else because why would he? He, himself, is a shapeshifter and a demon who sees all humans as grasshoppers. It’s like us discriminating against male ants and female ants, red ants or brown aunts. Why would we? They’re all aunts.

However, with that being said, he can still fall into the trappings of ignorance sometimes, subconsciously.

For example, at least in the beginning of the manga, when he needs to gather information from a woman, do you notice he tends to approach her in a more flirtatious/sensual manner? Even when he doesn’t have too? Beast is the most infamous example. Regardless of William’s presence, there really was no reason why he had to approach Beast that way, or even at all! Unless I missed something (which I very well could have), I don’t see a reason why he couldn’t approach someone like Dagger for information or even Doll, who was clearly just as emotionally vulnerable as Beast was.

I think Sebastian, subconsciously or otherwise, might have internalized some of the stupidity of the ideology around a “women’s place” in society during that time and, based on his good looks, believes that women are generally easy enough to get information from as long as he’s handsome and charismatic. Since he’s both of those things, all he has to do is wink and smile and it’s in the bag. Basically this is Sebastian. “Women respond best to sweet words and private attention, men respond best to ego stroking or violence.” Something like that. You get what I mean? I hope I’m making sense.

I also theorize that, while he wouldn’t necessarily see a black man as less than a white man, he wouldn’t be immune to believing in stereotypes about different groups of humans, especially if he hasn’t met one that’s challenged these stereotypes yet. For example, his knee jerk reaction to meeting a black person during his current time period, assuming he may not have ever met one, could default to, “Black = half evolved human, or “strong laborer humans” or “hypersexual/extra primitive human.” Simply because, those were the horrible stereotypes that persisted back then. But he wouldn’t act on his immediate thoughts unless given a reason too. He doesn’t treat Mey-rin, Lau, Soma, Agni, or any other ethnic character differently so it’s quite possible he doesn’t think anything at all.

To put it simply, it’d be like us seeing aunts and being like, “regular aunts are harmless, red aunts are dangerous and should be avoided.” But they’re still aunts and not worth thinking about more deeply than that (in some opinions!).

Onto sexuality, this one is particularly confusing to me because I see so much debate about this and truthfully I have no idea what to believe concerning canon. So I’m going purely on headcanon for this, and feel free to correct me if you have more information on this (assuming you’ve read this far).

So, I’m asexual or something like that (I’m figuring it out sis), and I’ve seen some people say that Sebastian is asexual because it seems like he doesn’t enjoy sex, and only sees it as a means to an end, which I do kind of agree. However, a few things confuse me.

As someone who doesn’t enjoy sex, I personally look for any excuse to not be bothered with it. Obviously, I’m not a demon, and I’m not Sebastian, but is there really no other way for him to gain information from women? Surely he could just use his words/mental manipulation tactics? There’s a thousand different ways to seduce a person or tear down someone’s guard without ever touching them. Surely, as a demon, he would know that, right? If so, then why isn’t this his default?

Personally, I think he does like sex but not for the reasons we think. I think he finds sex/sexuality with humans largely boring. He’s a demon after all. However, I do think he enjoys the potential pain he can inflict on others through sex. Sex is a very intimate thing that can alter your very soul, for better or for worse. I’d imagine giving yourself or being taken by a demon can do horrible things to a person’s psyche. Sebastian LOVES mind games. He may not care for the act, itself, but he’d love the torture and pain one can inflict through it. Se/ual a/use and r*** are one of the worst possible ways to hurt a person, beyond any type of physical torture. Hurting someone in the worst way possible by using something that’s supposed to give pleasure to humans? Sounds like a perfect torture method for our favorite beautiful monster.

Plus, sex isn't only used to express love and attraction. It has also historically been a way to assert dominance and control over people. It’s been used to strip people of their sense of self and all types of horrible evils of that nature. I don’t believe that to be out of character for Sebastian. Again, look at what he did to Beast.

So while I can see the argument for Sebastian being ace, I don’t think he dislikes sex at all. I think he does find a level of personal enjoyment from it, but not in the way we would think. Sick bastard.

The End.

Well, that’s it from me! What do y’all think? Do you agree? Disagree? Do you have anything you wanna add? Please do share it with me! Just don’t be mean, please. 😭

Congratulations to those who made it to the end cause this thang long as hell. Let me know if you’re interested in more headcanons for Sebastian and other Kuro characters. I might do some for ya! Cheers!

JaneicetheSiren

#black butler #kuroshitsuji #kuroshitsuji manga #o!ciel #sebastian michaelis #character analysis #black butler headcanons #please don’t take this seriously #i’m just talking #theories

31 notes · View notes

mooseyhischier · 12 days

Text

me knowing i’m not delusional about the will thing

@simp4hughes