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#personal experience
my-autism-adhd-blog · 3 months
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Being an autistic adult means unlearning all the ways the world taught you, you were broken
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Neurodivergent_lou
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flammaelunae · 6 months
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not exactly into somnophilia but those moments when you wake up next to your partner spooning them and they’re awake but still sooo sleepy and you start cuddling them and hugging them tighter, then softly touching them and kissing their neck and back, and they’re enjoying it and smile with their eyes still closed and press themselves against you, then the pathways of your hands become less innocent; each time your fingers caress their legs, you move closer towards the inner thighs; your grip tightens a bit around their waist as your hands travel up again; when you caress their upper body, you stay a little longer at the chest area, not so accidently touch their nipples; when you stroke their hair, sometimes you pull it just a little bit; and you notice that they, still dozy with their eyes closed, start to want more - they press themselves even tighter against you now, rub their legs together and you hear little whimpers coming from their mouth. you continue teasing them like this and keep kissing their neck, back and shoulder area, holding them close to you with your other arm which is placed below their neck and reaching around them, until eventually, you decide to move your hand between their legs and they moan in relief.
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aoi-kanna · 7 months
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My eternal gratitude to you @komikudikentalendo, and also to all the people who support my work, who have been there before and now, with kind words, encouraging me… I love you very much, I treasure you!
😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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deatmat · 5 months
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Ace therapy is something incredibly interesting. I just saw a post about how in therapy asexuality is still treated like an illness and how hard it is to find a therapist who won’t try to convert you. (I was going to put this in the reblogs but then my phone did a whacky thing and made it disappear)
I wanted to share that there’s another issue with therapy and asexuality: people trying to use therapy to ‘fix’ friends/family.
When I was 13 I started to see a therapist for anxiety and depression. I was so terrified that I forced my mother to attend the first session with me. We sat down with Dr. A and started discussing what I wanted to explore over my time with her. As I finished my bit about why I was here, my mom decided to tack on one last thing.
“We also struggle a lot with her sexuality.”
I looked at my mother in shock because while, yes my parents do struggle to accept it and that does play a role in my life that I’d like to talk about, it was not what I’d expected to hear. Dr. A asked her what she meant as I stiffened in the shoulders and started to dread what she’d say.
“Well just that she’s asexual, and a little confused, and maybe you can help her through that.”
This may seem like it could be harmless - maybe she meant it as in genuinely wanting someone to support me through a difficult transition. But, knowing my mother, she was waiting for a professional to validate her in her opinion that I was “confused” and “too young” and “just waiting for the right person/for my hormones to kick in.”
Thankfully, Dr. A seemed to sense I was uncomfortable and shuffled along the conversation. When we had our next session without my mom, she asked me if I wanted to talk about asexuality or if my mother just wanted to, and when I explained it wasn’t a huge issue in my life, she accepted that and moved on. Asexuality was only ever mentioned from there on when I was talking about the stress of other peoples reactions to it, in which it was immediately treated respectfully. Though my mother still asked after most sessions if asexuality had been brought up.
I was lucky to have a good therapist, someone who welcomed all variations of queer people without hesitation. If I had been without her, this would be a very different conversation about ace therapy.
The LGBTQIA community says asexuals don’t face discrimination but we’re still so unsafe in medical settings. Most of us know we can never mention being ace to our therapists or our treatments would begin to focusing on increasing our sex drives which don’t have anything wrong with them in the first place. It’s sick and wrong that people are using the system to their advantage and trying to snuff out our identities. Please stay safe out there my ace pals.
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dyke-bite · 5 months
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if youre fucking a poet remember to bite hard, suck harder, and eat them out like its your last fucking meal. its good for their art i promise
cishet men & minors dni
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crystalyssa35 · 6 months
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A General Guide to Writing Well, Now, & Consistently
In all my years writing, I have struggled with keeping writing as a fun and healthy habit. It took me five years (and many instances of writer's block and giving up) to actually have a basic set of guidelines to keep my writing going...
And I would like to share these "rules" with you all today!
Now, a bit of a disclaimer: developing the quality of your writing skills comes with time, research, and thinking. It may sound frustrating to hear, and you may hear it often, but the only way to get better at writing is to write and read often. Many times, just by jotting a silly thought down or reading fanfiction, you can spawn ideas without realizing it.
Now, to the list of tips that (I hope) will help you on your writing endeavors!
If you are not having fun writing your story, your readers will not have fun reading it. It sounds silly, but it's true! If you're enjoying your writing, you're more likely to write more and input more ideas into it!
Even if you have people to check your works, reread them on your own anyway. This may be a little frustrating tip for some, but let me tell you: I used to HATE checking my own stuff. The worst way I learned that personally checking it is a necessity was when my aunt checked it and pointed out tens of mistakes within my grammar, storyline, and characters. Check yo work, it will save you a LOT of embarrassment in the future.
Write anything. Read everything. As ambiguous and obscure as it will sound, it makes sense with context. As I mentioned before, the only way to get better at writing is to write and read often. Write anything your mind desires, that's simple enough. But read EVERYTHING; not only books, blogs, and articles, but also games, texts with friends, billboards, pictures with text, and (sorry, students) even homework as well. You'll be surprised how much your vocabulary expands when you actually pay attention to anything that is written (for me, it was video games. Seven-year old me knew vocabulary that I was taught in seventh grade because of it). And on that note...
Research what you don't know. Please, this one is genuinely important (I'm biased because it's one of my pet peeves). This includes words you don't know the definition of, spelling, and even generic, real-life information you want to add into your stories (e.g. I actually spent four hours researching how gemstones are categorized for my sci-fi story: Eco-Adstrum). Unfortunately, sometimes researching and fact-checking your ideas before writing them down can prove to be unmotivating, especially when you're wrong. But, it's always good to stay optimistic and be creative enough to twist the actual fact to mold it to your stories. Unless you're writing non-fiction, then maybe don't do that last bit.
If you have no ideas, keep wiggling your pencil. To those that recognize that phrase, yes, it is not my own. This is a piece of writing from former Tumblr user "officialtheonite" (I was only able to find the post because it has been reblogged multiple times) and their fifth grade writing teacher. Essentially, even if you have no ideas, keep writing. Write ANYTHING, even if it doesn't make sense. You will always be able to double-check it later and you will save yourself a lot of wasted time sitting around trying to stir the soup in your brain.
Balance the usage of your names and pronouns. To this day, I still struggle with this. I tend to use an abundance of pronouns when I'm referring to a character, so much so that sometimes, it becomes unclear on if we are still talking about aforementioned character or if we're talking about a different character entirely. Use names when the focus or action of a character is on stage; use pronouns if we are still talking about said character (even if we are talking about the same character, make sure you at least reiterate their name when there's a new paragraph).
I'll be editing and reworking this list as time goes on. I hope these tips can be of use so some of you all. Feel free to ask me any questions if needed. Enjoy writing and keep at it! I believe in you all!
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re-danimator · 1 year
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night-mince0 · 2 months
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@kimetsu-chan @larz-barz @shycroissanti @ta-ni-ya @naramaiz @saffron0v0 @tinyperson00 @aceofstars0(for when they get back) @cloudymistedskies @tokito-dulya20 @thewinterpillarhashira @moshi-moshh @thewinterpillarhashira @unofficialmuilover @pinkwisteria @ayunakatsukiwolfhashira @squidifier @sweetstarryeyedgirl @silliestsakura @kiyokatokito @kakajuri-fics @lonesomelad @colourstreakgryffin @creamsoda-cat @muitsuri @muichiroslovermwah @ghostbite0 @boo-simplified @renikyoki
None of the ppl tagged are in trouble for doing any of these! Please, don’t think that you are. Reblog and spread this, please.
(Edit- If this causes any trouble, please, alert me/ @night-mince0. This wasn’t meant to cause any trouble, but if it does, I sincerely apologise.)
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winedarkgod · 1 month
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some days praying at my altar and
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starsambrosia · 2 months
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Remembering the time with Apollo i heard some one screaming in the city and i ran towards it (rule no. 1 do not do that youll get ambushed 9 times out of 10)
Apollo told me not to go
I told him i would
I ran
My body freezes up and he says "you will turn around. And you will go home." And my body began to rotate without me and started walking home a bit stiff at first but i gave up fighting after a simple "no."
And that was one of the many times Apollo "walked" me home and most likely saved my damn life.
Though some times he just took over to show off that he was infact who he said he was, as i was at the time...genuinely convinced he was one of gods angels sent from heaven to get me to read the bible more 😭
He is like a watcher whos main goal is to keep me safe from myself
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sister-lucifer · 5 months
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wait ok hold on did anyone else grow up with parents who weren’t like. outwardly racist but when you introduced a friend who wasn’t the race they were expecting they pull the “oh, you didn’t tell me they were [black/asian/latino/what have you]” and then won’t elaborate when you ask why it matters
apparently this is. common in the south?? i thought i was the only one who experienced this?? is this a thing that happened to other people??
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my-autism-adhd-blog · 6 months
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Debunking Autism Experiences…
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Neurodivergent_lou
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sysmedsaresexist · 6 months
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The Caterpillar Game
A fun way to fuck up your kids
And me trying to distract myself.
I always kind of wondered when my OCD started.
Was I born this fucked up? (Science says no)
Or was it something else? Something that happened to me?
I have a wedding in about... two weeks? I'll be attending in a dress, unfortunately, which means doing my eyebrows so I look presentable.
During the pandemic lock downs, I had to learn to do my eyebrows myself, and I'm actually really pleased to say that I'm pretty okay at it now?
Having neat eyebrows doesn't do much to help me look more masculine, but it's important, because my OCD really likes to show itself through trichotillomania.
Hair pulling.
For me, it's hair on my face, specifically chin and neck, and I'll pick and pick and pick until I'm bloody. This has gotten worse since covid because unless you're waxing and threading consistently, there's always hair there, ripe for the picking.
But I've managed, and my bank account has thanked me.
It's not perfect, though, so with a wedding looming just around the corner, I've been letting everything grow. That way, a professional can reshape my brows and then I'll repeat for another two years until I make them wonky and I'll repeat this process.
But as I sit here, struggling against every fibre of my being that tells me to pick, I wonder where this started.
How to play
Growing up, my aunt liked to play the caterpillar game.
The rules are simple.
Smack the forehead of people with a unibrow to kill the caterpillar.
There's no winning. Just smacks. Until you die.
The first time I remember this happening was when I was 6 or 7. By 8, I was threading with my mom when she would go.
My cousin, my aunt's daughter, has ruined her eyebrows. They don't grow anymore? They're very, very thin. The style of the time, but something she regrets.
Sometimes, I wonder why she doesn't struggle like I do, and then I remember that she probably is, just in different ways. At least I still have eyebrows, even if my brain wants them gone.
She has her own kids now, but they're both boys, and I hope she doesn't have anymore.
I hope she doesn't have a girl.
I hope the caterpillar game dies with us.
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tleeaves · 5 months
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The church always felt like another version of theatre to me. I never felt what other people apparently felt. No presence of God or otherwise made Themself apparent to me. It was like Santa or the Tooth Fairy. A piece of make-believe I just had to pretend and act my way through lest anyone think I was weird or a demon or something. The high ceiling, the red carpets, the altar, the pews, the many candles, the chandeliers, the confession box - they were all set pieces to set an eerie yet grandiose feeling about the place. The only chills I ever got was from the reverent way people spoke of Him, when as a kid, I thought these people were mad and I was the only sane one, which was a frightening idea, because it also meant I was on the Outside of whatever was going on. So I had to pretend. When I went to confession, I had no clue what to confess about. Was I some inherently horrible person who committed sins weekly and should feel shame over it and beg for forgiveness and advice? I used to wrack my brain for something I had done wrong, anything. I'd come up with yelling at my sister or something over a matter she and I already made peace on. The priest on the other side of the curtain would say something like, "ah yes, it is difficult having siblings. You must make it up to her, for the Lord is watching. And He will absolve you once you earn His forgiveness." I would exit feeling heavier, because participating in any of this felt like a lie. Because I did not believe in God. Did not understand how anyone could. I lied a lot as a kid. Mostly to fit in or avoid trouble. I would never confess that to a priest. He was just a man, a man who could speak with others, and I did not need others to know I was the lying sort as a child. That seemed more sinful than yelling at my sister.
Maybe it's because I was raised to be distrustful and sceptical. Maybe the church is only one half of the things that instilled shame in me as a child. But the church was like theatre. It was all a performance, all the time, built on stories, ones people just chose to believe wholeheartedly in and judge themselves by. I didn't understand it then and I still struggle to now. But not as much. To me, it is still a performance, but one people partake in for the sake of community, belonging, and meaning. But I cannot fathom such deep faith in something like that. I do not mean to insult anyone by this either. I am speaking of my own complicated relationship with religion and the church. Religion and worship can be many things. In the end, I would rather humble myself before the earth and all its life than any single god who would command I solely dedicate myself to Themself. Because respect and gratitude I understand. And I hold that for this planet.
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nothingbutloveforyou · 3 months
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Im also wine drunk and i love someone who hates me but i'd give up everything for them (they still wouldn't care) but i can't contain the love for them🧍 help what to do
you are basically me 4 years ago. don’t give into it. tell your friends and have them tell you the same. you deserve better. so much more. and i know you’d do so much to be with them but pls don’t.
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whatiswhump · 2 months
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Chronic Pain in Whump potentially for post recovery Whumpees
I have a rare autoimmune/ autoinflammatory disease which results in severe joint pain, internal bleeding (mostly in GI tract), and nerve spasms and loss of feeling in limbs from time to time. Now I am on chemo to treat it. I can describe the surprising side effects I didn't expect in another post if anyone is curious.
I used to be an incredibly active person so although the progression of the disease was quite slow for a while, when I could no longer ignore it, it looked like night and day to all those around me. One day I was functioning (although using every ounce of strength to) and the next day I was not.
Nerve pain- like electricity jabs, I can feel them and their patterns, sometimes I involuntarily twitch from them they’re so strong. I can almost visualize the tree-like paths. Even more often it is like have a piece of glass stuck in my toe or finger that I keep feeling for days or weeks at a time.
A couple of years ago I was so convinced I had glass in my toe after an afternoon with sandals at the pub that when I couldn't get it out at home, we went to the A and E and I asked them to take a scalpel to my foot to get it out. Even though they didn't see anything in the xray I insisted and they did. I kept asking them to dig deeper and deeper becuase I could FEEL it. Eventually they said we had to stop. Years later I found out it is nerve damage. The nerves have been pressed and frayed in ways they aren’t meant to and even if they do heal, they take a Very Long time to heal- so if a whumpee undergoes torture, I’d bet they’ll be feeling those shocks for months or years afterwards if any nerves are compromised.
Joint Pain- Warm, so incredibly warm- my sister can feel the heat radiating off the affected joints when she touches them, my wrist will be hot while forearm cool, elbow- hot. The pain radiates too- dull, blunt, throbbing pain. Coying and filling every sense like a suffocating fog. Not sharp like a knife, like nerves, or an initial break of a bone. But no less intense. It feels like the joints will implode from the inside out of the steady but sure pressure that has to go somewhere- surely a body can't hold so much pain. Moving is difficult because you are so stiff, stairs seems almost impossible and in and out of bed is a herculanean task. You fall asleep when exhaustion overrides pain and in a few hours wake up when pain overrides exhaustion, it is a cycle, over and over. My previous boyfriend could practically time down to the minute when I’d wake in the night. This pain can be so brutal it can bring on nausea too. Surprising for something blunt.
But the joints are attacking themselves and your dog doesn't know why you won't bend down to pet her.
Internal Bleeding- I bled for about a year before anything could be done about it. It hurt like hell too but I was a 22 year old woman so it wasn't a hurry to figure it out.
The first thing is normal iron levels plummeted. They didn't know why until later that it was becuase of the continual significant blood loss (important to keep in mind for characters who lose a lot of blood). It was like I donated a bag of blood every two days or less. I had to sit every week to get a bag of black colored iron infused into my veins to get back to a reasonable amount of iron- my body could make more blood but couldn’t get that much more iron from nowhere.
It actually really does make you pale to bleed internally like that over time. When I saw the hematologist that was the first thing he said about my appearance and soon after the internal bleeding slowed, there was pink under my skin again. Your whumpee really will look visibly different if they can stop the bleeding for a bit.
I doubt this is very helpful... but I guess this is my way of beginning to write about chronic pain and whump- I'd really like to use it! So this was a first exercise.
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