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#people might get mad at me for this but fuck it
irndad · 2 days
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Hi, I’m so sorry, I searched for request guidelines and must be missing them so if this isn’t something you write I apologize-
Flower prompt heliotrope with Spencer where reader sacrifices herself/or gets shot to save Maeve so Spencer can be happy, even though she’s hopelessly in love with him. 🥹
Little angst, little fluff. You can decide if reader fully sacrifices or just gets really badly hurt and how Spencer reacts.
my dear!! there are no rules yet- i have things i won't fill but thus far the onus has been on me to clarify. i had so much fun writing this- thank you for requesting it!!! requests r open :^) wc: 1.1k
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“Is Maeve okay?”
It’s the first thing she says when she wakes up from her hospital bed. Spencer’s shaking, a little woozy too. It turns out that they have the same blood type, and she lost a whole fucking lot of it. He’d been happy to give it to her, although ‘happy’feels like the wrong word to use in this situation. 
She had internal bleeding, and collapsed harshly from the gunshot, scuffing her forehead so badly she needed stitches. Comparatively, it’s the least of her worries, but still- Spencer can’t stop staring at it. She’s literally marred by the choice she made to protect him. 
Maeve is okay. She’s in the same hospital, but Spencer’s spent about ten minutes with her- the rest of the last 12 hours of his life were spent oscillating between donating blood and praying to a deity he’s not sure exists. 
She’d survived. They’d both survived. He should feel relieved- why doesn’t he feel relieved?
It’s a stupid question that he keeps asking himself. Two of the most important people in his life are alive, but still in the moment, her blood spilling over him- the gasp of her breath when the bullet hit her- He’s going to remember the sound of it forever, what it sounded like for her to almost die for someone else. He hates that she’s the type of person to do it. To jump in front of a loaded gun for a woman she’s never met before. 
He’s mad at her. He has no right to be- he gets a chance with Maeve now, and that’s all due to the choice she made. And yet- he’s so, so angry at her. Because she could be dead right now. He could never, ever talk to her again. She made a choice that meant that he might have never been able to hear her voice, do a magic trick for her, ever, ever be near her again. How the fuck could she do that to him?
“Yes,” he replies, “she’s okay.”
She nods agreeably, before wincing at what appeared to be an intense ache at her temples. 
“My head hurts,” she says, her voice low and endearing, and his heart roars with protectiveness. “Do you think I could have a juice box?”
She’s so sweet- he wants to laugh, in a sad desperate kind of way. This is his favorite person in the world, sitting up shakily and asking for juice, clearly groggy and so endearing. He almost lost her. 
“You’re okay too,” he says, “If you’re wondering. You scared us. You had internal bleeding and a concussion. You lost a lot of blood.”
It’s only then she frowns. 
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” she pouts, trying to sit up and speak to him. “But it all worked out, Spence. She’s okay.”
“It didn’t all work out!” Her eyes widen at his outburst, and he feels like scum. Yelling at her when she’s in a hospital bed, taking a bullet so he’d have a chance at romance. 
“You said she’s okay,” she says back, slowly. “I don’t understand.”
“You lost blood. You almost died. That is not it working out. You have to tell me you understand that.” He doesn’t know why he’s being so harsh, but he also doesn’t know why he has to explain this to her. 
“I know,” she sighs, “I know. But this is the job, and I didn’t have time to get a vest on!”
“Then you wait. You wait. You don’t just burst in-“
“And you would’ve lost the love of your life!”
“What makes you think she’s the love of my life?”
A nurse shuffles by the room and Spencer takes a deep breath. He doesn’t want to be kicked out of her room, and on some level he knows how crazy it is to be yelling at a gunshot victim. He pinches his nose, eyes winced in frustration. 
She’s been his favorite person by a wide margin for an incredibly long time. She joined the team as a consultant and he remembers the first time he did a card trick for her- the first time he’d fallen asleep on her shoulder. He was so grateful to know her. Still is. In this moment, knowing feels like time slipping out from an hourglass- like it was almost numbered. Their time was almost finished. 
Maeve was lovely. Maeve listened and she was kind and Spencer really did like her. He’s glad she’s safe, now. But his best friend, his coworker and favorite person- Spencer thought everyone could tell that he’s been in love with the team consultant since the first week he knew her. 
Everything he liked about Maeve reminded him of her. 
And she’d jumped in front of a bullet for someone she thought he was in love with. And fuck, maybe he did love her in some way- but whatever ‘in love’ meant with Maeve, this sorrow, the pain of knowing she’d almost been someone he’d have to remember was far, far deeper. 
“You’ve never mentioned anyone to me romantically. I’ve known you for years, Spencer. She’s important to you.”
Maeve is. She was. It’s all so confusing now. He has liked someone for years, though. He couldn’t tell her, though. Maeve was a welcome distraction from a love he thought was wholly impractical and impossible to love him back— a love that now he has to witness languish in a hospital bed. 
Morgan knew. Morgan would tease him every time Spencer drew a smiley face in purple marker on her coffee cup. He would tell him to just ask her out, and it had always felt so improbable. She’d never go for someone as lanky and uncharismatic as him. 
“You’re important to me.” 
She has no idea how much. 
Her eyes soften at that, and not for the first time, he wants to curl into her arms. He wants to lay next to her in the hospital bed, and feel her pulse beat against bare skin. Feel her pulse and with every beat know that she is alive. 
“I know that, Spence,” she breathes out.
Even though it’s not kosher, not necessarily the right thing to do when your not-girlfriend/girl you went on one date with is in the same hospital, but when his best friend opens up her arms for a hug, he ends up doing exactly what he wanted. 
The team finds her asleep in her hospital bed, with Spencer asleep in her arms. It feels voyeuristic to look at, but Spencer really, really couldn’t care. 
He resolved to tell her that he loves her as soon as she’s healed. With the way Morgan side eyes him every time he ‘helps’ her walk across a room by holding her waist, he’s not sure he’ll last that long. 
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bigfatbimbo · 3 days
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Please do continue about girldick Charlie! I want to see your thoughts!
girldick charlie x reader general headcanons —
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summary — Vague, horny and self indulgent rambles about girldick Charlie… obviously
a/n — I love her so much. My problem is that no one ever requests her! Anyways, i’m eating this prompt up.
warning — smut, charlie is a switch and so is the reader in this scenario, girldick, oral, degradation and praise, NOT ENTIRELY PROOFREAD!!!
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***QUICK BACKUP INFO IF YOU DIDN’T SEE THE POST!!! Basically, we see that Lucifer has the ability to shapeshift, and since i’ve already written boycunt Lucifer… and Charlie is his daughter… maybe that ability would be… passed on. No because like you would just ask her like, “Dick tonight, baby?” and she’d be like “Of course, sweetie. Anything for you!” as if it’s not a wild as fuck request. Like you’re literally asking ‘Hey, can you casually just switch up your body parts for a sec? I feel like getting fucked outta my mind.’ And Charlie is just down immediately. Anything to make you happy and feeling taken care of is okay with her. Stressful day? Feeling bad about yourself? Just horny as fuck? Your problems will be solved with Charlie’s dick and the best goddamn aftercare of your life. Because when Charlie leads, she’s absolutely a soft dom/service top. Everything she says and does is to make you have a good experience because to her, sex is not about how she feels! She is ensuring you’re having a great time at any cost. So maybe you had a super stressful day, you’re anxious about work you didn’t do or didn’t compete well enough, and it’s bugging you. She’s coaxing you into taking a break, telling you she’d take care of you. Her comforting words while rubbing your shoulder quickly turns into her on top of you, gently fucking into you with praising words. She’s rutting into you at a steady, but not rough pace, with her hands pining your wrists above the bed. And she’s going on and on, semi-coherently might I add because she’s very sensitive, about how proud of you she is, and how hard you worked, and how you’ve done everything to deserve this. And even though she’s not used to having a dick so she’s super touchy and hypersensitive, she would literally never cum until you have. Your pleasure comes first, always. But…. mean Charlie does something to me. Because she’s not easily upset, doesn’t have a temper, and is very nice. However, her demon form?? That ‘fuck you’ to Susan?? When she’s mad it’s a whole other story. Imagine the rare situation pissing her. Poking her and fucking with her, giving her kids of shit and attitude all day, and then finally she snaps. And she uncharacteristically aggressive. Her horns come out and she fuck you actually rough, with little to no mercy. But after one round she’d go back to her normal praising self, making up for her degrading words with loads of praise while she recedes into her normal gentle pace. Anyways, let’s talk about subby girldick Charlie, thank you very much. There are two roads you could take; very praising, or needlessly mean. Charlie and praise stick out to me so much. She’s always doing everything in other peoples favor. She solves other people’s problems, not her own. A little hypocritical, don’t you think. So she’s in her office overworking herself as usual, but you can’t stand that. Obviously, you go to put a stop to it. Giving her a long kiss, before whispering, “Dick today, please.” and she’d hesitate and be like “Honey… I have a lots of work to do and—“ but you’d emphasize your first point with a harsher, but not mean, strict tone, “Now, baby.” She’d reluctantly oblige, watching as you sink to your knees and pull her pants down, reading her hardening cock. “Oh, you think now is really the best time too— nngh!” she’d try to protest, being cut off with a moan as you drag your tongue across the length of your dick. After muttering about how ‘beautiful’ she is, you fully sink your mouth down onto her, taking her in. Your pace starts slow, getting used to her dick in your mouth, pulling out whimpers from Charlie as she leans back in her chair, and softly petting her thighs to comfort her. But then you speed up, and Charlie’s whimpers become loud and needy whines. She can’t help how fast she cums in your mouth. “I’m so sorry— I— Are you okay? Was that too much?” But then you fucking swallow and go back down for more. The only times you pull away are to tell her how pretty she is, how amazing she’s doing, and how beautiful she sounds
 And let me tell you, she is reeling under all the praise. She’s squirming in her seat while you suck her cock dry, all while saying such nice things. She can barely contain herself, even when her eyes go red and her horns come out. 
But, imagine being mean to her about it. Like practically demanding her dick, but this time, in a mean way. Shoving her down on the mattress and riding her dick so fast and rough she can barely take it.
And when her eyes full with tears because of the overstimulation, degrading her for being such a crybaby. “Oh please, Charlie. You can’t even handle this? Is the poor princess crying over how good her dicks being rode? Pathetic.”
And she cries even harder because she didn’t even do anything to warrant that!! But she finds it harder and harder to be upset when you’re humping her rougher after every orgasm. 
It’s fogging up her brain so bad, she can’t even ask you to stop being mean anymore, she just whines and arches off the mattress as you slam your pussy against her achey, used up dick. Now, would she call you mommy while you ride her dick in oblivion? Well with the absence of her own… no yeah. The answer is yeah. Oh, and imagine making her have a dick JUST to peg her and not give any stimulation or attention to it at all. Hearing her whine as her hands go to jerk herself off, but batting them away, telling her she needs to be patient.
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a/n — Boy oh boy, do I love being mean to nice people, or what, folks? Anyways, send more Charlie requests. We as a society need more of her.
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Aita for telling my partner they need to be better at communicating during sex?
NSFW ask, but this has been an ongoing issue for a while and I’m very frustrated
My (19M) partner (21NB) is my first true sexual partner. They’ve been with other people in the past, some good experiences but mostly bad. I on the other hand have dated before and have had pseudo-sexual relationships (just touching) but my partner is the first person I’ve properly done the horizontal tango with
That being said, with my just-touching exes, we’ve always been extremely careful about communication in the moment. My most recent ex and I had the stoplight method even when we weren’t being kinky. It was reassuring to be able to check up on her and for her to be able to do the same. Maybe we were playing is too safe, idk, but that’s what I became comfortable with during sex
With my current partner, however, this has never been the case with their exes. I think I might be the first partner they’ve had that actually took time before making any sexual advances to ask them what they like and how I can make them happy because in the moment when I did, they looked confused.
Being horny young adults, we did eventually sleep together, and during the act, I realized that neither of us had checked in on the other outside of the initial “is this okay?” when removing clothes (I was the one who asked) so I slowed my roll and asked my partner if they were with me. They were not. They sputtered and said that I brought them out of the moment, and I became really really concerned that they had been disassociating the entire time because of previous sexual trauma. I told them I wanted to stop, they did not, so I rolled off and whispered into their ear while (and I apologize for not finding a better way to describe this without being overly graphic) I was straight jorkin’ em off. They were happy, they fell asleep, and I felt awful.
About half an hour later they kicked me out because their mom was coming home from a New Years Eve party (it was my 19th birthday which also hurt), but that’s not relevant, I just need the timeline in place.
We’ve done more sexual things since then and every time I try to check on them, they get weirded out. I stopped doing it in the moment so overtly and changed tactics to asking “what can I do for you” and “what do you need baby”, and this seems to get the job done. However, afterwards when I ask actually ask them how they were feeling, they would say that “the afterglow’s ruined” (which is wild because we’ve been together for six months and I’ve never finished -> I am a pre-op transman and my partner is AMAB, aka has told me that they don’t know what to do with my parts and once joked that sex would be easier if I had a dick, for context)
The last straw was tonight (March 4th) when they came over to my place and we started making out. I wasn’t really feeling it, so I tried to back off and shift to just lazy kisses, but my partner didn’t stop so I pulled away and said: “not tonight, baby”
They said: “if you weren’t in the mood, why did you kiss me?”
I said: “because I like kissing you?”
They said: “you should have told me you didn’t want to do anything. I don’t want to get the wrong idea.”
I said: “I’m sorry, I should have. I thought I wanted to, but I changed my mind. Can we go back to watching anime?”
They said yes and we watched another episode of a show (dungeon meshi!!) before I finally asked them why they don’t check in with me the way I do with them
They said: “I don’t like talking during sex. Ruins the vibe”
I said: “Okay, so can we find a system that lets the other know how we’re feeling when we don’t want to talk? Like how I use signs when I go nonverbal?”
They said: “I don’t see the point. If you don’t want to fuck, just push me off.”
I got mad and said: “What is wrong with you? I don’t want to push you off, I want to talk about it!”
They told me I was getting worked up and left. It’s been two hours and I feel like total shit for pushing the subject when they’ve expressed that they don’t like my expectations for sex. Am I too high maintenance?
TL;DR, I annoyed my partner by asking too many times for them to talk to me during sex, they got pissed and left my house. Atia for asking too many times?
What are these acronyms?
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mitch-the-silly · 1 day
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VOX PART 2 AAAAAAA
Alright y'all, I locked in today, so it's time to get fed! Flock around!
Vox x fem!reader
Angst!!!
"Can't Seem to Hold Me, Can't Seem to Let Him Go" Pt.2
Part 1
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The moving truck pulled up to the V-Tower’s parking, you hugged your torso as you saw them go inside your shared room with Vox. You were taking your dresser and your clothes, your nightstand and your lamp. You were done with this. He’d refuted you and put you at the bottom of his priority list. It was despicable and you hated the very notion of him right now. After all the time you two spent together…  
You wiped a few tears off your face as you called a Taxi driving off to your new apartment. Vox wasn’t watching you right now, he was sure to be watching Alastor. So you fled to your newly acquired studio apartment. The only thing in the small living space was your mattress, the fridge, and the stove. It looked quite barren, but it was a start. You knew you meant nothing to Vox at this point, so despite the cramped space you were to live in now, distancing yourself from him was going to be a new beginning for you. A chapter of your life in which you didn’t depend on Vox. And while it may hurt you now, you knew that it would eventually fade… right?
However, your departure from the V-Tower wasn’t quite unnoticed. Despite Alastor occupying most of his attention, there came a time in which Vox HAD to sleep. Thus prompting him to go to his room. Of course, he expected you to be there. Yeah, he’d yelled at you today, but you couldn’t be too mad. Nothing an apology couldn’t fix. 
He opened the door to your shared bungalow suite, calling out to you nonchalantly, “Hey babe, I’m done with work for today. You want to… watch a movie or something, I don’t know.” He shrugged walking into the suite bedroom. The second he opened the door, he paused. 
Some furniture was missing. Your nightstand was gone and a painting he’d bought you for your birthday was taken off the wall too, nowhere to be seen. This could not be. What the hell happened to you? He ran towards your closet; it was empty. 
Fuck.
You weren’t kidnapped or anything, you left willingly. 
No no no no. Not now. Not now. This wasn’t possible. The only person who so adoringly loved him was gone. At the cusp of his rivalry with Alastor. The love and validation he solely craved, the very little he had… no, the abundance he had which he was absolutely oblivious to. 
What had he done to make her THIS mad at him?
Fuck… That thing she asked him… She’d asked him if she was important to him and instead of replying to her properly… no, why had he done that? Well… he knew why. Alastor. He wasn’t really ready (and shit, he might never be) to truly delve into why Alastor made him too erratic aside from the obvious rivalry. 
Regardless of all of this, he couldn’t stand the thought of having driven you away. He took the first object he saw and slammed it into the wall. He didn’t know what it was he’d picked up until he heard the shattering of ceramic. It was a mug you’d picked out for him. He’d left it on his nightstand the night before after drinking a cup of tea. He looked down at it, the little red letters on the now shattered navy blue mug made his livid expression rapidly morph into a self-loathing frown.
He had to find her. Now. 
He zapped out of the room, checking cameras, asking around, stopping every sinner in his building for information. And, desperate for an answer, he even recurred to his fellow Vees. First asking Velvette, who somehow had no answer to give him.
Last resort: Valentino. Vox was more than hesitant to ask Valentino of all people about your whereabouts because if he knew he wouldn’t tell him and of course, if he didn’t he obviously would have nothing today, but Vox wasn’t going to pass up a possible lead on finding you. So he stormed into Valetino’s tower, slamming the door open, not even waiting for the girls at his door to open it for him. Upon doing this, Vox was met with an annoyed, nasty look from Valentino.
“The fuck, Vox? What’s up your ass today?... Because it could be me but your little girlfriend wouldn’t like that, obviously.” Val sighed, rolling his eyes. He was watching something on his TV, not wanting to look away because of how invested he was in it (or maybe because he already couldn’t see the screen, so he had to work extra hard to even know who was talking to whom). 
“Real funny Val; where is she? Have you seen her?” Vox asked, ignoring his vulgar comment, hoping to seem like he still had some sort of composure. 
“Oh, she’s not in your bed right now? Are you really here looking for the little slut?” Valentino chuckled, turning towards him.
“D̵o̴n̶'̸t̶ ̵y̴o̴u̷ ̸f̵u̵c̴k̶i̵n̶g̴ ̶c̴a̴l̶l̵ ̶h̸e̵r̶ ̴t̴h̷a̴t̸,̶ ̴I̵'̶m̸ ̵n̷o̴t̶ ̷i̷n̴ ̶t̸h̸e̵ ̵d̵a̶m̴n̷ ̷m̶o̸o̵d̶.” Vox spat back, his patience waning quickly and his voice crackling in annoyance. 
Valentino scrunched up his face in offense, “Shit, fine! Ugh… last I saw her, she got in a Taxi. I thought she had some errand to run. Now get the fuck out of here, you’re killing my fucking vibe.” Valentino huffed, turning back to his program.
Vox wasted no time zapping out of the tower, as Valentino called out, “Have fun chasing your bitch!” Much to his benefit, Vox was already gone when he said this.
He zapped from camera to camera, looking through each for a millisecond. He had millions of cameras and he had to move fast. And this he did! Eventually catching a glimpse of a feature that identified you. He remained there in front of the camera where he’d last seen you. However, unluckily for him, the camera was in a hallway and he had no access to the room behind those doors.
He knocked on the door gently, adjusting his collar and manifesting a bouquet of flowers into exitance and into his hands. He gave the closed door his widest smile, hoping to do the same to your face.
“Coming!” You called out from the other side of the door, unaware of who was behind it. You would be privy to who was knocking on your door, however, the second you looked into the peephole. 
You opened the door, looking Vox up and down, “There is no fucking way in Hell.” You scoffed.
“Babe… hey…” He mumbled, his smile weakening a bit.
“Yeah no, drop the bit. Get the fuck out of here, my place in your priority list was left very clear this morning. You don’t even deserve a breakup text, go away.” You huffed, turning around and attempting to close the door behind you. However, the attempt failed due to Vox sticking his foot between the doorframe and the door itself. 
“Sweetheart, come on! I’m sorry! It wasn’t that big of a deal, let’s just-”
“It wasn’t that big of a deal!? VOX. I asked you if I was important to you and you replied with ‘Alastor is more important.’!” You yelled at him, outraged at his comment.
“Actually, I said ‘Alastor is important to me right now.’ ” Vox corrected, which did not really help his case.
“Are you fucking serious right now?! That’s pretty much the same thing?! Who the fuck responds to that question with that sort of answer!?” You spat back.
“Come onnnn! You can’t hate me that much over it, I didn’t mean, I was just… busy…” Vox explained; a half-assed explanation in your opinion. 
“Vox, you little shit, you’ve been, ‘busy’ for months now! Too busy in fact that you missed MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY WEEKS AGO! And here I am like an idiot thinking, ‘Oh, he’s probably really stressed! Lemme hop off his dick and not get on him because he’s gonna feel bad.’ BUT NOOOO! APPARENTLY ALASTOR IS MORE FUCKING IMPORTANT TO YOU!” You cried out, tears welling up in your eyes as you hit him out of the pure frustration seeping out from you. 
Vox took the hits; he deserved them. How could he have forgotten? This is why you responded this way. “I’m so sorry baby… I… you’re not gonna believe me but I did genuinely forget about what days have passed…”
“Fuck if I care, you already fucked up.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him.
“NO BABE! Please… just… I can’t lose you, please, I fucked up, I’ll fix it! What do you want? I- I- have my wallet here, here’s my card! You can get whatever you want! It’s on me!” He insisted, one rejection away from physically groveling at your feet.
Rejection which you’d sure give him. “Are you trying to buy me back?!” You replied, stepping back away from him.
“No no no! That’s not it! I just- W-what else can I do? No no, what do you want me to do?” He asked, getting on his knees in front of you. Claws dug into the floor as he looked up at you in emotional agony.
“I want you to get the fuck out of here.” You spoke. Nice and simple.
“NO! Please! Baby! You gotta give me a chance! I’ll fix anything you ask me to! I’ll take you everywhere with me if you need me to! Please! I’ll treat you like the goddess you are! Just… don’t leave me… please…” He begged the flowers in his hand already disheveled and lacking petals. He seemed… genuinely afraid of receiving no as an answer to this question. It sort of pained you.
You looked back at him, hesitant to speak again, “Are you… are you lying to me?”
“Of course not! You name it, I’ll do it! I just… don't ask m why but I just can’t stand the thought of fucking losing you…” Vox replied, still begging on his knees for your return.
You groaned, giving him a look of pity, he… he was insecure… this was the version of him where you could see under all his masks… “Fine… I’ll go back. But just know that if you play some shit like this again I’m NOT taking you back. I don’t give a shit how hard you beg.” You replied, taking the bouquet of flowers from his hands. 
You looked at them, and despite them being all beat up, they were beautiful…
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Taglist for this fic:
@preciousbabypeter
@readergirlstuff
@shanksstrawhat
@call-me-nyxx
@vexendoe @luujjvi @ghosterstrudel @sirenetheblogger @farah-o-0 @tinathepineapplelover @vox-simp @thegreathiroshi @futureittomainn @mimikyu-of-death @absolut3lyn0t @chaotickitten91
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Old Scars, New Blood 5
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Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, manipulation, borderline bullying, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: Reader has accepted that she’ll never be wanted, not only by the man she’s crushed on for years, but by anyone. That is until a new player enters the game. (f!, short!reader)
Character: Lloyd Hansen, Thor Odinson
Note: I hope you all have a great day.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)
Love you all. Take care. 💖
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The rest of the drive is spent in silence, at least on your end. Lloyd chews loudly, licking his chops, and sucking his fingers loudly. The rose tint is tinged gray.
You pull into the compound and shift into park sharply. You don't move as you wait for Lloyd to get out. He wastes no time ditching you, letting out a shameless belch as he drops down onto the ground. The door snaps shut behind him and you huff.
You look over at the garbage left in his place. That's exactly where you belong. Right there with the trash.
You swipe up the crumple bag filled with wrappers and his half-finished soda. The keys jingle against the paper cup as you swipe your phone out behind you. You dump what's left of the espresso from your own cup and sheath it around the other.
You elbow the door shut and cross the dark grounds. The moon is a sliver that offers little light in the dark. You approach the doors and enter to the muted ruckus of voices and clinking bottles. Yet another night of debauchery. You don't know how Lloyd hasn't fallen right in with his guests.
You go to the kitchen and jam the bag and cups deep in the bin. You have half the mind to go through the fridge and get rid of all those meals you slaved over. Just like everything else, he'll spit it back in your face.
You flip open the door and stop yourself. No, no, he got the reaction he wanted, you're only shooting your own foot at this point. 
Your eyes center on a dark bottle with a silver label. Fuck it. You snatch the prosecco and swing the fridge shut.
You march back down the hall and ignore the din that seeps through from the dining room and various other doorways. You go upstairs to your room and close yourself in, letting the wood slam into the frame. You're not even mad at him, you're furious at yourself. Why can't you just accept it?
You drop the keys on the dresser, your phone too, and keep the bottle in hand. You untwist the wire around the cork and toss it aside. You push with your thumb until it pops and a fizzle escapes the long neck. 
You watch the wisp that rises and you gulp straight from the bottle. You cringe as your eyes water from bubbles and the stringently sweet wine floods your mouth. You gulp until you can't anymore. A quarter of the bottle down, you plunk it on the nightstand and let it sink into your veins.
You undress lazily and leave your clothes on the floor. You don't give a fuck. For one night, you just don't want to think. Hell, if you drink enough, you might just do something real stupid.
You grab the bottle and carry it into the bathroom. As you bend over to twist the faucet, the wine creeps into your brain, hazing your vision in warmth. You pull the lever for the stopper and slowly push yourself straight.
You lean on the porcelain and take another swig. You pop your mouth off the rim and lift one leg, then the other. You ease into the tub, splashing slightly as the water flows higher and higher.
You lean your head back, resting the bottle against the edge as you grip it tight. The ripples around you and beneath the skin and numb the ache in your chest. You close your eyes, drinking without thinking, guzzling until your stomach is full and the tub is nearly full.
You lay as you are, basking in the heat of the water. You could fall asleep right there. Just drift beneath the surface.
That thought jerks you awake. You sit up, dizzy, and get to your knees clumsily. You reach over the side to clunk the bottle onto the tile. You flip the stopper and lift yourself.
You get out, feet crashing onto the bathmat. You cling to the tub and take a breath. You reach for the bar and drag the towel off. You don't feel too bad, just a bit unsteady.
You wrap yourself up and teeter as you bend to grab the bottle. You clamber towards the door. You nudge it all the way open with your elbow.
As you enter the room, you stagger to a halt. You don't expect the figure sitting on your bed, watching you enter as he faces the bathroom door. You blink and squeeze the bottle tighter. 
You're buzzed. No, you're drunk.
You skin singes with self-awareness. Not only of the alcohol that dulls your mind but of the single piece of fabric around you.
“It's not healthy to drink alone,” Thor grins, a paper crinkles between his fingers, “or other things.”
He shows the slip of paper and you shake your head. He clicks his tongue and squints at it, “didn't take you for a cherry girl.”
“Huh?” You tilt your head, confused until you recall hastily hiding away the receipt in your pants. Fuck.
“I don't really use lube myself. Don't need it,” he reaches to drop the paper on the night table.
“What are you…” you clamp your lips shut as a hiccup rises. You swallow it and sway. 
“I don't make promises I don't keep, “ he stands, towering over you as he comes closer.
“You… it was a joke, wasn't it?” You babble dumbly.
“Why would I joke about that?” He stops before you and wraps his hand around the bottle, “mm, not much for bubbly,” he wiggles it free and swiftly empties what's left before examining the empty bottle, “how was your little business trip, eh?”
You frown and cross your arms over the top of the towel, “why are you here?” You ask again.
“I told you–”
“No, why… why did you come here? He hates you.”
“I got that sense of him,” Thor chortles, “doesn't bother me much.” He backs away and sets the bottle on the receipt, “I'm here to play with him. Have a bit of fun. However, he's not as amusing as I hoped. But you…”
“I…” you shake your head, “I'm drunk. I need to lay down.”
“Happily,” he winks as he reaches for you.
You sidle away, “please, I…” you swallow and your eyes flit around, “I can't–”
“Because of him? You’re wasting your time,” he latches onto your hand and draws it away from your chest, “he doesn't deserve you, little lamb.”
“I don't… it isn't because of him…”
“You're a poor liar,” he tuts, “shouldn't take your lessons from him.”
“Stop,” you try to tug away.
“You don't know what you need,” he drags you towards the bed, “it isn't him.”
“Please,” you whimper.
“You don't need to be nervous, I can be nice, kitten,” he purrs as he yanks you against him.
“I can't–” you squeak into a yelp as the towel falls away from your body, “Thor, please–”
“Louder,” he swiftly picks you up with his hands on your ass. 
You writhe against him as he spins and falls with you onto the mattress. It bounces under you and you nearly choke on your tongue. You slap his chest as he leans over you and smothers your mouth with his.
You close your eyes as they tingle and you dig your nails into the fabric of his shirt. You whimper and feel around with your other hand as he kneads your ass. You're overcome by his brusqueness. More so, you can't handle the touch, the way his hot breath consumes you, and that flicker on your core that has the vision of another flashing in your mind.
You turn your head and let out a croak as your tears leak out, “I can't,” you whine, “you're right, okay? I want him. I'm a stupid girl that wants someone like him.”
You bring your hand up to shield your face as he lifts himself on his elbow. He hovers over you as you devolve into sobs, “I'm pathetic.”
“Shhhh,” the soft stroke along your cheek startles you, “little kitty,” he slithers, “shhh.”
He shifts and comes down to his side. He slips his arm under your neck as you curl up, trying to disappear. He rolls you towards him so your face is against his shoulder. He pets your head as he holds you.
“Oh, little one,” he cooes, “it hurts now… but I can make it so much better.”
He stays like that, embracing you as you quake in your despair. You keep your face buried against his shirt as his thick muscles fill you with a sense of security. His other hand rests on your hip but does not wander.
Heaviness drapes over you and your body slowly slackens. The wine dulls your nerves and swirls in your head. You feel yourself spiraling and quickly fade into the void.
❤️‍🩹
Your brow twitches and your nose itches. You nearly smack yourself as you throw your hand up and groan. The effort makes you wince.
Ugh, hungover. It's been a while.
You bend your leg and the blanket falls away to uncover your naked thigh. You frown and peek down as you lift the blanket. No clothes. You blanch and lay back, trying to summon the memories of the previous night.
The buzzing of the shower draws your attention away from your internal search. Along with the thrum is the deep baritone singing a song you've never heard. You blink, long and hard, and push yourself up.
Your heart feels as if it's stopped beating. Your breath catches and you look around the room. There's clothing hung over the chair in the corner. Men's clothes.
Oh god.
You wouldn't…
As the melody carries, slightly offkey, you recognise the singer. Thor. Oh. Oh no.
You curl your fingers against the mattress, barely able to hold yourself up. You remember the bath and then him waiting and him on top of you but everything else is gone. How can you not remember? 
A pit plunges down to your stomach. No, you're not like that. You've held out all these years…
Well, how many chances did you really get?
The shower cranks off and you gulp, hugging the blanket against your chest as you sidle around to the edge of the bed. You can hear him moving around, humming. You don't know what to do.
As the door opens, you try to think of what to say. Hi, good morning, what the heck happened last night?
You're speechless as he emerges butt naked. Brazen as he has himself on full display. Full display.
You snap your mouth shut as he uses a towel to dry his hair and winks as he drops it down to wrap his waist. 
“Morning, kitten,” he growls, “you seem chipper.”
You try to talk but can only cough. You reach to touch your throat and rub the lump free, “Thor, what… last night…” your voice cracks with each syllable.
“Ha, you think we…” he lets the suggestion dangle and scoffs.
You nod. Of course, he's all bluster. He wouldn't actually want you.
“When it happens, you will remember it,” he taunts, “I like to build up to sleep fucking.”
Your jaw falls open, “Thor…”
“Besides, if anything had happened, you would remember it.”
“I…” you flutter your lashes, “I should–”
“Well here you are,” he knots the towel around his waist, “lucid…”
“...get dressed,” you complete your previous threat.
You stand but he blocks you easily. He catches your shoulders and urges you back. Your legs hit the mattress and you sit, unable to fight his strength.
“Now?” You squeak.
He rumbles with laughter as his hands trail down your arms, “just a taste. To pep me up for the day.”
“Uhhh,” your voice rolls out senselessly as his hand crawls over the blanket and he tugs it. You cling to it desperately. 
He snarls and yanks up the bottom, tossing it over his head as he seizes your thighs beneath. You yelp as he bows and pulls your legs apart. You lose hold of the blanket and it rumples at your waist as you catch yourself on the heels of your hands.
You wriggle and try to resist him as his head pokes up beneath the blankets. He has you leaning back on your arms as he pulls your legs over his shoulders. You lift a hand and slap his head as you realise what he's about to do.
Too late.
Your hand falls against his head as his hot breath tingles along your thighs. His cool tongue slips between your folds and you gasp, electricity coursing through you. Oh!
You let out a pathetic noise as you push futilely on his head, still writhing as he nuzzles further into you. His large tongue spreads wide and he flicks it up over your clit. You spasm and yipe in surprise at another zing.
“Thor,” you breathe.
He pulls back for just an instant, “louder, kitten, can't hear you under here.”
He dives back in and the bed bounces as you jolt. You try to smack him again but only urge him. You gasp and quiver helplessly, toes curling and legs tingling. What do you do?
Oh god, what can you do? This is better than any toy you got hidden in your nightstand. This is an actual man. It's real and it feels so good.
He wraps his arms around your legs and rips you down onto your back as he lifts your pelvis higher. He hums into you and it ripples up to your chest. You hiss and slap the bed as lay defeated.
“Ohhhhh,” you drone out as you succumb to the delightful swirls.
He growls and your breath hitches. He turns his head, just for a moment, and nips your thigh, “louder…”
You mewl and utter his name. It's as much a plea for him to keep going as it is for him to stop. He laps at you again and you cry out. That seems to fuel his fervour as he suckles at you eagerly. 
Your voice rises without your permission. Your whines burst from you as you claw at the blanket and squirm. You can't hold back. It's more than just that moment, it's years of waiting, of wanting.
You don't care that it's not who you wanted. You don't care if anyone else hears. You can't think straight enough for any of that as you call out Thor’s name, bucking your hips desperately into an orgasm.
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sepublic · 22 hours
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Alright hear me out. Pythor x Overlord yaoi. Think about it. The only people the Overlord has really interacted with are yes-men he created to serve him, such as Kozu and Cryptor, or people he's manipulated after rescuing at a low point in their lives, so Garmadon and Harumi.
Pythor is different; He's someone wholly independent of the Overlord, who went out of his way to find and rescue him, totally of his own volition. The Overlord might not have even known Pythor existed up until they met. Others, the Overlord has had to control and take advantage of, but him and Pythor are always on the same track, there's no moral hesitation on his end. They have an evil laugh together, the Overlord outright tells Pythor that he likes him.
Of course Kozu and Cryptor do everything for the Overlord, they were made for that. Pythor CHOSE to be unconditionally loyal. He says he wants the Overlord as a means of revenge against the ninja, but he still took a bullet for the Overlord, which necessitated Zane's sacrifice. Maybe Pythor was more assured of the Overlord's ability to destroy the ninja than his own, and was willing to die for vengeance because what else does he have left?
He's an outcast by Serpentine standards; In the canon Pythor's Revenge book, part of his motives for stealing the BorgWatch ahead of its release was to impress his fellow Serpentine into letting him back in, but they don't. Everyone blames Pythor for nearly getting them killed, he's hated by his own kind now, and was evidently somewhat of a black sheep even amongst his own Anacondrai, who eventually did recognize him at the end of S4.
Does Pythor even know what he's doing with his life anymore, or is he just angry and bitter and looking for an outlet? Has he been driven twice mad, first by surviving the starvation and Donner Party cannibalism of his kind, and then burning inside of the Great Devourer? He was all alone after the Great Devourer, vulnerable and having to take care of himself.
Maybe he sees himself in the Overlord, someone considered an absolute monster with nobody else on his side, who just wants to lash out at the world. Maybe there's a kinship between the two, where Pythor gives him the helper he himself needed. Multiple times, he is the Overlord's savior, when usually it is the other way around between the Overlord and his found champion; There are times where HE is guiding the Overlord with advice, having a grounded, mortal perspective that he needs. The Overlord has had minions and pawns, but him and Pythor genuinely feel like an equal standing.
Don't you think it's kinda sus that the Overlord trusts Pythor more with his damaged condition, than the Nindroid he literally programmed to serve him? He knew Cryptor longer. But Pythor's willing, unconditional loyalty really is something else; I think the Overlord's never had a mortal choose to be on his side without coercion of some kind, so he's like his first real friend. The only person he actually respects enough to listen to; Someone the Overlord trusts to intimately hide in the body of, over any other mechanical means up until this point. Maybe he was just sick of robotic confined and wanted to feel flesh. But maybe…!
Cryptor is wary of Pythor and learning the Overlord really did trust this Serpentine more than his own creation is frustrating to him. He thinks they're both vying for paternal affection from the Overlord. On Cryptor's end, that is the case. But for Pythor, he, um. Fucked that old man.
In Crystalized, I kinda see the Overlord as replacing the twisted paternal role that Harumi tried to place Garmadon into. So in addition to any possibly objections over the mastermind of her parents' demise being on C.O.C.K., not only is the Overlord justifying it by explaining that Pythor is loyal, but also. Also he's his husband. Evil purple couple. By extension that makes Pythor her dad, her fourth dad. Harumi has to explain to Mr. F that Pythor fucked her dad.
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bestjeanistmonster · 2 days
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Hey! Love ur DC au, and I don’t mean to be rude and don’t know if u take ideas/prompts- but I thought it would be really cool if tails/robin and Amy/batgirl had a chance or something happened and they were sent back to the past before Nicky became Sonic/Harley and they could stop it from happening- but something in the future becomes worst because Nicky wasn’t Sonic/Harley- idk how the ending would go- maybe something like they have to let Nikey go and become Sonic or Nikey sacrifices himself to become Sonic in order to save the future. But I don’t know if you take prompts but I love ur art and AUs!
Okay okay so i usually don’t take plot ideas but im making this time an exception cuz i actually rlly rlly like this idea!!
Cuz apart from the running plot going on in the background for the most part it’s a lot of monster of the week type adventures going on most of the time and this is a rlly fun adventure to think about
(And! This actually reminds me of an episode of batman the animated series where Mad Hatter puts Batman to sleep and putting him into a dream reality where his parents never died and therefore batman didn’t exist and he has to break out of it and i just LOVE it!!)
The idea of them learning to ‘keep moving forward’ this way would be so goo! Like everytime they change the past in some way to save their friend it ends with them losing something else, so they keep making changes and the present keeps getting worse and they keep just obsessing over getting it right this time! They had to find a way to get the ideal life with their friend, there had to be some way to get it
And then there’s this breakdown moment of not knowing what to do cuz the present just seems fucked up no matter what and then maybe Nicky himself unknowingly gives them the advice they needed to fix the present
Like yeah, the past sucks, but obsessing over stuff you could’ve done differently or trying to obsess over some potential future would just end up driving you crazy. At the end of the day you can’t change the past, and you can’t control the future either, all you can really do is do what you can do in the present and hope for the best
“I mean present can’t be all bad, right?”
Like yeah they lost someone important to them, but they realise that they also gained some people too, new friends, a new life.
So they let Nicky become Sonic
It hurts so much to let it happen but they know they can’t change what happened to Nicky… but they can still try to help Sonic
It might be a lost cause, it might even be too late but they’ll sure as hell try anyway
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pit babe ep 7 stray thoughts
- way made him feel undeserving of love….
- so jeff is like that cause he’s plagued by visions..
- ok now i get the peteway posts. oh ways pathetic nature and whiny bitch demeanor have captivated pete body and soul
- oh way might be my little meow meow of the show
- oh god oh fuck i might be a peteway boy
- kim needs to kiss winner to shut him up
- omg person who hurt protagonist was antagonist pikachu surprise face
- scream this is so dramatic. the scheming it’s all coming together (also peep kentakim this is for you le trash prince)
- ok so this is where we find out tony wants to sell babe for bitching
- AH CHARLIES THERE THE DRAMA
- do they know charlie’s powers also who WAIT IS THIS A NUTHPHOP BALLADnvm just sounded like ambivalent thoughts
- way seems happy i don’t trust this. is he about to break
- oh he is oh no it’s babe. oh i think someone’s gonna ugly cry it can go either way at this point. babe sweeeeep
- oh… maybe i don’t want this babe babe nooooooo nooooooo. oh he’s gonna close his heart off to other people now isn’t he oh fuck noooooooo SOMEONE STOP HIS THOUGHT LROCESS PPLEASE
- i don’t understand ways face here i need subtitles but for facial expressions
- oh poor puppy
- does anyone know if they make the music in house
- this ep might be my fav so far….
- is way an omega y’all
- there’s been a shift in babe…. i can’t explain it but something changed in the last 20 min
- babe being an easy cryer is so important to me actually
- ooo surveillance being a theme again lets goooo
- SCREAM CHARLIE BACKSTORY AND MOTIVSTION OH GOD ITS HAPOENING EVERYBODY STAY CALM STAY FUCKING CALM
- charlie trauma enthusiasts let’s gooooo
- tony is so fucking evil i hope charlie rips his face off
- how wild would it be if winner was an enigma. like he’s not but could you imagine
- actually i need kenta to rip tony’s face off
- does charlie know about his power. does anyone
- babe looking like a wet feral cat i need to lie down
- SCREAM HE JUST FLAT OUT TELLS BABE LIKE THAY?!,!?!?! like i’d be scared to get punched like ???? it’s wild he just flat out says i took your power like wow i thought he’d lie at least a little
- these flashbacks can never be happy can they… always gotta leave you horny and destroyed
- charlie being like “don’t worry i can fix this. if you want i can just kill myself” like broooooo
- scream do you think charlie woke up one day like “damn he smells fine today” skejdjfjejrjr
- “can mama not break up with papa 🥺” “ 😒😑😩 fine”
- honestly i get babe if someone took away my sensory issues id still fuck them. much more enthusiastically then before probably. i get him now liking kissing too like this makes perfect sense to me
- oh way….. oh god this pathetic man nothing can go right for him ever ima creaming
- i also get babe because charlie is so cute id fold immediately like so what you stole my super powers look at your cutie patootie self how could i stay mad
- oh here we go car sex scene- are they talking about booty holes rn is this happening on my screen… good for them
- oh way… i’m so sorry my baby boy im so sorry… honestly he’s stronger than me i would’ve been throwing shit THE BOUQUET
- ok so are the only ones with special powers jeff babe and charlie (and way ??)
- NORTHSONIC these absolute clowns. does he not understand adoption i love him. nosrthdaonic aenwwvehtjrngn l. what are these two talking about. way omega confirmation ????
- sonic get your boy on a leash his poor impulse control and lack of common sense is staggering
- kim kinda right like let him cook oh ew fuck tony for that too
well what an ep
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hekateinhell · 23 hours
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I just need to get something off my chest real quick, there's really no need to read this unless you want to because you're bored lmao.
So I used to be really good at answering the asks I got. I wouldn't say I answered all of them, but I think overall I had a good ratio for a long time! And I loved it! I think the asks feature is the best thing that tumblr has to offer as a social media platform (god knows just about everything else sucks).
I loved getting asks and answering them and it's a great way to talk to others in our little fandom bubbles and trade thoughts and insights with one another. My mental health did take quite a few hits in the past several months, and part of that was real life (school, sickness, death in the family) and part of that was bullshit fandom drama.
But it just occurred to me yesterday that the reason I'm nowhere near as prolific in answering the asks I get is because I have always put so much effort into putting disclaimers behind all my meta, walking on eggshells so people won't throw tantrums every time I share an opinion they don't like.
And you know what? That just made me an nervous, erratic person afraid of her own tumblr shadow. The thought of having to do all the work to put ten thousand disclaimers behind everything I say so some asshole won't vague me because I accidentally hurt their feelings just made me not want to reply to anything at all. It's fucking exhausting having to think of every scenario in which people might interpret whatever you're saying (about fictional characters may I remind you) in the worst light possible.
In the end all that time and effort I put into censoring myself—because I try to be a nice person, I don't want anyone to feel bad because of me, regardless of the fact that that's been never my intention—in the end none of that mattered! There's people that have been vaguing me for almost two years now and it's not like I go seeking out this information but it's a small fandom and I stumble over it on another blog or some shit every once in a while.
Agonizing over whether or not some random is going to interpret everything I say in the worst possible faith and have a fit on main about my shit takes and make a block list of people who interact with my posts is just so stupid honestly, and trying to censor myself didn't do me a shred of good. People still regularly call me names and insult my intelligence because of the characters I ship, the meta I write, and the kinks I enjoy talking about. It doesn't even matter if I've been active recently or not, they're still mad about stuff I said ages ago! I can't win!
So from now on I'm just to do my best to break this depressing old habit and be online without being apologetic and diminishing my own opinions, answer asks however the hell I want without feeling obligated to coddle a bunch of grown ass adults, and if people want to cry about it, there's a box of tissues in the corner. Go nuts. ♥️
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dootznbootz · 5 months
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Odysseus was afraid the entire year on Aeaea in the Odyssey.
Content warnings: Rape, Sexual Coercion, Sexual assault, Sex Work, power dynamics, this will also be long as fuck as I talk too much. This is NOT a "Circe the Goddess Hate Post". I call her out but that's it. I tried to keep this neutral but still making a point (Let me know if I gotta put more)
Lots of lovely folks on here have written great essays on what Calypso did to Odysseus as it's soooo blatantly obvious there. It literally states how he cried every day and how he flinched from Calypso, very straightforward on how he was explicitly raped.
But I've noticed that a lot of people are always iffy about Circe's situation (understandably so, it's not so in your face.) She's usually always mentioned in the "Odysseus never cheated! He was raped!" posts but then the evidence is only ever given against Calypso, and then mentioning how you can't say no or disobey the orders of an immortal and how it was in exchange for freeing his men.
WHICH IS ALL CORRECT!!! But!!!
There ARE immortal/mortal couples who genuinely love each other. Dionysus and Ariadne, and Eros and Psyche are examples. Apollo and Hyacinthus. Psyche indeed becomes immortal eventually and in some versions, both Hyacinthus and Ariadne do too. But even while mortal themselves, their immortal lovers still remained respectful and loving towards them and definitely doted on them. There are definitely power dynamics at play here but there's some nuance.
Odysseus and Circe's relationship, however, is very different. We all know he slept with her at the very least once. And that was in exchange for his men being returned to humans. That was the only time it was explicitly stated. With Calypso, it tells you every night he was enchanted and slept beside her. It was the narrator speaking but Odysseus is the narrator now and it's his story. If you think he lied, this probably won't change your mind anyway.
But even if it was a one-time thing, (which isn't the only interpretation and I will have points that talk about others) then why did he stay a year? What was he doing?
I'm doing a deep dive into the year he spent on Aeaea based on evidence in Book 10 and then the beginning of Book 12. Step by step, and honestly I'm writing this for Tumblr, not as a thesis so I will be a bit more casual but still using sources. To me, it's very obvious that he was uncomfortable throughout the text simply based on the language that is used. But it's very subtle and not an outright statement of "He's been crying every day."
BTW, just so we're clear, this is not a "Circe is the root of all evil, etc." type of post.
This isn't meant to villainize her. She's an immortal being and in mythology that changes things. Everybody is morally gray. I genuinely think if we were to ask her feelings on it, she'd probably be like "Oh, yeah! Turned his men into pigs! Strange little man he was." I don't think she gave a flying fuck.
I just simply get pissed tf off when people think Odysseus was fine. It honestly disturbs me how often I'll go on other websites YouTube and see everyone call him a whore and a womanizer. It's sexism at its finest because 1.) "MaN AlwAyS wAnTs sEx" and 2.) women can't rape/coerce. THIS IS SIMPLY TO LOOK INTO HIS FEELINGS ABOUT IT.
This is also only for Homer's Odyssey, using different translations. If you want to discuss this, (I'd be happy to! Just be nice!) DON'T BRING UP ANY OTHER WORKS.
With all that out of the way, come yell with me 🤗
I've read multiple translations, as I know there's going to be bias depending on who's translating. And having done so, each one has basically the same situations described the same so that's nice for consistency. Also, there are some parts in the story that are vague and that we'll never have answers to.
Odysseus first simply sees the smoke from her chimney and then sends his men in, after drawing lots Eurylochus leads half of the men to check out the house. I mentioned here vaguely how the 2 immortals he sleeps with are both introduced while singing and weaving, which could be seen as an enchantment (which to me is most likely. They both possess magic and are goddesses). So I'm just gonna move past that. Just take a peek and come back or just know that enchantment was likely.
Next, I'll see people often joke on Tumblr about how
"Odysseus says that Polites is his best friend yet only mentions him once!"
I think Odysseus mentions his best friend, the one to jubilantly go in first, to show WHY he would go through with this. How much these comrades mean to him. That's his best friend, and there are approximately 20 others who are now pigs as well. Could you knowingly leave one of your best friends to live a life like that knowing you could've done something?
[...]Circe—and deep inside they heard her singing, lifting her spellbinding voice as she glided back and forth at her great immortal loom, her enchanting web a shimmering glory only goddesses can weave. Polites, captain of armies, took command, the closest, most devoted man I had: ‘Friends, there’s someone inside, plying a great loom, and how she sings—enthralling! The whole house is echoing to her song. Goddess or woman—let’s call out to her now!’ So he urged and the men called out and hailed her. She opened her gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting them all in, and in they went, all innocence.
(Fagles, Book 10)
In the Odyssey, it's never mentioned why she turns people into animals. I think they were turned into pigs because, throughout the Iliad and Odyssey, Odysseus is often associated with boars. His men are associated with him, therefore: 🐖 Piggy. From what we know, the lads were just eating her food. With how much Xenia and hospitality are a large part of the story, they probably thought they were safe. They were GUESTS. This is especially welcome after the Cyclops and the Laestrygonians. And it literally says "All innocence". They were simply naive.
Then Eurylochus runs back, so terrified that he couldn't speak at first. He then begs Odysseus to just leave the men behind. Odysseus has shown that he does TRY to save his men when it is truly not reckless to do so.
But I shot back, ‘Eurylochus, stay right here, eating, drinking, safe by the black ship. I must be off. Necessity drives me on.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Then the famous warning from Hermes. I've seen folks bring this up when talking about this. YES, he is literally commanded by Hermes to not refuse her if he wants his men back in basically every translation. It sounds like Circe was warned as well. When? We don't know, but it sounds like Hermes didn't pick "sides" here.
Strange that he was still like, "Sleep with each other" to both, because he could've been like, "Circe, there's this guy named Odysseus. When he comes to this island, change his men back." But who knows, maybe it was Circe's idea from the beginning and Hermes went along with it. Just food for thought.
Now here’s your plan of action, step by step. The moment Circe strikes with her long thin wand, you draw your sharp sword sheathed at your hip and rush her fast as if to run her through! She’ll cower in fear and coax you to her bed— but don’t refuse the goddess’ bed, not then, not if she’s to release your friends and treat you well yourself. But have her swear the binding oath of the blessed gods she’ll never plot some new intrigue to harm you, once you lie there naked— never unman you, strip away your courage!’
(Fagles, Book 10)
But that doesn't explain why he was there for a year afterward! Nor if he himself was okay with it, which is what I'm trying to delve into as he wasn't.
Also the knife thing? She's still immortal. It was meant to startle her. Her dad is Helios. Odysseus would've been toast, literally.
Also note this exchange wasn't a "Yippee! Hermes says I'm going to get laid!".
...just approaching the halls of Circe, my heart a heaving storm at every step, paused at her doors, the nymph with lovely braids— I stood and shouted to her there. She heard my voice, she opened the gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting me in, and in I went, all anguish now …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Another translation by Ian Johnston, (they all say the same thing essentially but trying to make a point.)
I continued on to Circe’s home. As I moved on, my heart was turning over many gloomy thoughts. After I had walked up to the gateway                                                of fair-haired Circe’s house, I just stood there and gave a shout. The goddess heard my voice.                      She came out at once, opened her bright doors, and invited me inside. I entered, heart full of misgivings.
HE👏WAS👏SCARED! The tone is solemn and suspenseful. He was just told that without Hermes' help with the root, he wouldn't be able to survive and bring back his men. Circe was dangerous.
He made her swear not to harm him.
Straightaway she began to swear the oath that I required—never, she’d never do me harm—and when she’d finished, then, at last, I mounted Circe’s gorgeous bed …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Please note that she NEVER promised that to his men. His comrades did NOT have moli in their systems. He had no way of truly ensuring their safety in any way from Circe.
He then refuses to eat or speak, literally "lost in grim forebodings". If he "just got laid", then why isn't he happy? Not many men can say that a goddess CHOSE to have sex with them. He did it to get his men turned back. It was an exchange. I don't think Circe is "Evil" so maybe it slipped her mind. Or yes, she could've thought, "Hey, I got what I wanted. He's handsome enough. Homer never shuts up about how hot this guy is He hasn't brought up the pigs yet. I'll just let this play out. Maybe HE forgot. I don't have to do anything." We don't know. But Odysseus probably felt like he got deceived.
"Hey, I did my part of the deal. I slept with you. Now do yours."
She pressed me to eat. I had no taste for food. I just sat there, mind wandering, far away … lost in grim forebodings. As soon as Circe saw me, huddled, not touching my food, immersed in sorrow, she sidled near with a coaxing, winged word: ‘Odysseus, why just sit there, struck dumb, eating your heart out, not touching food or drink? Suspect me of still more treachery? Nothing to fear. Haven’t I just sworn my solemn, binding oath?’
So she asked, but I protested, ‘Circe— how could any man in his right mind endure the taste of food and drink before he’d freed his comrades-in-arms and looked them in the eyes? If you, you really want me to eat and drink, set them free, all my beloved comrades— let me feast my eyes.’ So I demanded.
(Fagles, Book 10)
He doesn't trust her despite what she had told him that he should when they sleep together. He has figured out that while she will not hurt him, his men were not a part of that oath, the men he was trying to protect in the first place.
She is then moved by how they rejoice when they see one another again. While turning people into animals for funsies isn't cool and coercion is fucked up, I think she comes to see this group as not quite friends but I think she did find them entertaining in a way.
This is very strange but I've seen some folks say that since Odysseus was pissed at Eurylochus for still not believing him about Circe is proof that "Oh he was trying to defend her!". Which??? Uh, Eurylochus was literally questioning his leadership as a whole. Calling him reckless and shit. He is captain and he's the King, he can't let that shit slide. The text literally says "Mutinous". Also if I had to sleep with someone I did not want to especially if it was to save my friends and I got called names afterward I'd get fucking pissed too.
Only Eurylochus tried to hold my shipmates back, his mutinous outburst aimed at one and all: ‘Poor fools, where are we running now? Why are we tempting fate?— why stumble blindly down to Circe’s halls? She’ll turn us all into pigs or wolves or lions made to guard that palace of hers—by force, I tell you— just as the Cyclops trapped our comrades in his lair with hotheaded Odysseus right beside them all— thanks to this man’s rashness they died too!
They stay a year. Again it's never stated that Odysseus slept with her that whole time. You could interpret that. (Honestly, I feel Circe would get bored with him? She's a goddess, she's got more important matters than mortal men. And she definitely doesn't love him.)
His men DO have to bring it up that "Odysseus has forgotten his native land." Maybe they thought they could sneak out without her knowing??? I am fucking REACHING but hold on as Telemachus did because he knew Nestor would well, be Nestor and try to coax him with "Have a meal with us! Let me tell you about how badass I used to be in my youth." But to sneak away from a goddess? Without her permission? That won't end too well. Aeolus in the beginning kicked out Odysseus when he tried to ask for another bag of wind. If she didn't want him around, she could literally boot him out. While she didn't force him to stay like Calypso did, she didn't "release" him either.
We don't know if they've been asking for a long time. Odysseus does say to Circe that they have been begging him nonstop, but he could also be saying that to try and convince her. He's good at persuasion. I think while he knew he could rely on her for food, shelter, and good advice, he still didn't feel...SAFE with her. I think he was possibly avoiding her personally.
I think HOW he asks her to leave is important to know as well.
...but I went up to that luxurious bed of Circe’s, hugged her by the knees and the goddess heard my winging supplication: ‘Circe, now make good a promise you gave me once— it’s time to help me home. My heart longs to be home, my comrades’ hearts as well. They wear me down, pleading with me whenever you’re away.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Throughout all of Homer's works, the characters grasp another's knees when they are desperate and are literally at the other person's mercy. Priam did when begging Achilles for Hector's body back. The man who literally killed his son and was defiling his body by dragging it around. Leodes grabs Odysseus' knees to beg for his life before Ody kills him. If he saw her as a friend, and not a captor, WHY DID HE FEEL THE NEED TO BEG IN ORDER TO LEAVE?! No one, who is in a healthy relationship, has to BEG for permission to leave. Or to "Break up", if you interpret them as still sleeping together.
And even Circe acknowledges that he is there against his will!
‘Royal son of Laertes, Odysseus, old campaigner, stay on no more in my house against your will.
(Fagles, Book 10)
[...]Odysseus, man of many resources, scion of Zeus, son of Laertes, don’t stay here a moment longer against your will
(A.S. Kline, Book 10)
This is probably another reach that you can ignore but the whole "they wear me down", could be trying to appease her. "Look, you're REALLY cool, it's actually my crew that wants to leave hahahah please don't kill them"
I mentioned before how Telemachus snuck away from Nestor but that was simply out of necessity because he needed to go home now. Not rest for the night. NOW. Nestor is just everyone's grandpa. Menelaus kind of talked more but Telemachus is very straight up in "Please I have to go now" and Menelaus immediately got things ready for him. He never has to beg and clasp his knees. Telemachus was never afraid. Menelaus is a fun uncle and Helen is your cool auntie.
Back to Circe! She tells him instructions for the underworld, they were in her bedroom. But that might've been the only way to speak with her. As even Penelope is usually away from the suitors when they are in her halls, Circe may have done the same. The text never states she played hostess physically. If she was hosting in the halls during the day, why did Odysseus wait until night to talk to her? He could've just asked her while she was on her throne in front of everyone. (He did so with the Phaeacians)
Or maybe he went alone because she only swore an oath to not harm him and so he didn't want his men near if she decided she didn't want to let them go. I could be missing something here so feel free to say something. Idk if this was a pride thing on how "I don't want others to see me beg".
She has info he needs in order to go home as well. She tells him to go to the Underworld.
She gave him new fine clothes and put on pretty clothes herself but that doesn't mean they had sex. Nausicaa gave him nice clothes as well but he never slept with her.
Then he leaves. Immediately. Not even doing a headcount as he didn't realize one of his men had died. (That was negligence on his part but he wanted out) He booked it, to the UNDERWORLD BY THE WAY. Circe even had to sneak the animals he needed for the sacrifice. Odysseus even basically said "She's a goddess. She can do things mortals can't" at the end of the book. And it almost feels...Numb? Solemn? Neutral? Gives a "It is what it is" vibe.
But Circe got to the dark hull before us, tethered a ram and black ewe close by— slipping past unseen. Who can glimpse a god who wants to be invisible gliding here and there?
(Fagles, Book 10)
She’d slipped past us with ease, for who can see a god move back and forth, if she has no desire to be observed?
(Johnston, Book 10)
She's a goddess. She has magic. She can do whatever the fuck she wants.
NOW ON TO BOOK 12!!! That was long! GET A SNACK AND WATER! LUCKILY THIS'LL BE SHORTER!
In Book 11, Odysseus swears, upon all his loved ones in Ithaca, to Elpenor that he'd give him a proper burial as he's been "unwept, unburied". So in Book 12, he sails back to Aeaea to fulfill his promise.
But you know what's funny to me?
He didn't tell Circe he was there.
He didn't even go to greet Circe himself. He sent his men to go get Elpenor's body.
The biggest clue that he didn't love/trust her is that if she was his "Affair partner" then why not go see her for "one last night together"?
SHE came out herself and pulled him aside to know what happened and then gave more advice.
I dispatched some men to Circe’s halls to bring the dead Elpenor’s body. [...]
Nor did our coming back from Death escape Circe— she hurried toward us, decked in rich regalia, handmaids following close with trays of bread and meats galore and glinting ruddy wine. [...]
But Circe, taking me by the hand, drew me away from all my shipmates there and sat me down and lying beside me probed me for details
(Fagles, Book 12)
In every translation, it talks about how he sits, and she lounges/lies down. That's not sex 🙃 In some translations, it even says he tried to be with his shipmates but she pulled him away!
So we lay down and slept beside our ship’s stern cables. But Circe took me by the hand and led me away, some distance from the crew. She made me sit, while she stretched out beside me on the ground. 
(Johnston, Book 12)
Then, she gives advice about the sirens, Charybdis, Scylla, and her father's Cattle. He tries to ask if he could save all his men. She scolds him for even thinking he could try. He again books it out of there.
I think we all know it wasn't "love". But I think a lot of people think Odysseus was willing and happy with whatever this was. "Friends with Benefits", if you will. I guess you could see it that way but I will say that makes me feel itchy with the whole power dynamic and fear. I don't think folks who have that arrangement have to beg on their knees to ask if they can leave though.
I mean the entirety of Book 10 gives me the vibes of "Laughing uncomfortably because you don't want to upset the other person". To just grin and bear it.
A lot of this was just putting the text here and picking it apart step by step. What you do with this is up to you. It's rambling while banging pots and pans together.
Maybe you see him as drugged the entire year and still sleeping together, as the moli "wore off". Even then, just because her magic can't affect him, there are plenty of natural concoctions that can be created that can affect mortals.
Maybe you see the entire year as sex work in exchange for shelter and food.
Maybe he was just alongside his men the whole time under her roof and was avoiding her after the exchange. After he got asked by his men to finally leave, he would start to walk up to that room only to freeze and turn around, thinking "One more day won't hurt. Should wait until I know she's in a sympathetic mood".
I beg of you, however, PLEASE understand that there was fear and coercion throughout his entirety on Aeaea. He wasn't staying to get laid. While there is so much going on and too many things that are left vague to really know exactly what happened, it is consistent that he was scared/numb. Lots of people go through with things they don't really want to do just to appease others. There are plenty of situations of sexual trauma where one person goes through something and the other has no idea the other person isn't okay. ESPECIALLY WHEN SOMEONE CAN HARM THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT AT ANY MOMENT!
Sexual trauma is a very complicated thing and while he was scared, he definitely wasn't as traumatized by her as he was by Calypso. Calypso was a torturous hell while Circe was a year of walking on eggshells. Not comparable but I still think it should be acknowledged. It's wild because I read the Odyssey and kept thinking "Y'all are calling the sex slave a cheater? The guy who slept with a goddess to get his men back? The ultimate simp apparently doesn't love his wife??"
Things I'm adding that shouldn't affect the argument as it is not in the Odyssey but I want to mention as it's a "fun fact": Odysseus' dad was an Argonaut. Laertes probably met Circe as well, (or knew of her) with the whole purifying thing and maybe Odysseus heard his dad tell stories of her. Later myths also have Circe with the habit of turning her crushes (or their lovers) into something with Scylla and Picus.
In conclusion, Yeah, he was afraid of her. At least to an extent. And don't pull the whole "Ancient men didn't get raped". Male victims exist and deserve compassion for what was done to them and women are capable of sexual abuse. If you think otherwise, you are not a true feminist and Fuck you. I said in the beginning this'll be casual and I don't wanna write a fancy ending. You can still think Circe is neat but you have to know that this was fucked up.
If you think a lot of this is bullshit or wanna give more context or wish to yell with me but still know he wasn't alright on Aeaea, cool. If you want to point out mistakes or something I should keep in mind with interpretations then feel free to say so but give text evidence. If you try and bring up the Telegony and/or Madeline Miller's Circe, fuck clean off. This is Homer. If you call Odysseus a whore and not the malewife he canonically is I'll start biting. 😤
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stuckinapril · 1 month
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#I’m only very rarely inclined to get this intimate w my thoughts so I might as well say it NOW butttt I will never not see the dead children#In everything I do#Like legit#I’ve read up on Hind so extensively and seen so many photos of her#And I have a very healthy relationship w the popular Palestinian journalists so she’s not my blorbo or anything#But hearing that memo destroyed me bc bisan is only 23 and she seemed so vivacious#Idk like I do normal people things I can’t just pause on my life#But idk how it feels like to sit at a boba place and enjoy my pearl milk tea w my friends#While the horrors over there don’t just lurk the back of my mind. I do normal things and I’m guilty for having the luxury#And as an Iraqi girl I’m living in the literal ideal timeline#Where my mom decided to immigrate to the us and that’s why I’m here living a normal life like everyone else#It’s like in a different world if I were born in a different time it could’ve so easily been me. I’m one of the Lucky Ones idk#It’s not survivor’s guilt bc it’s not like I had to survive anything like I never had the chance to live in Iraq or anything#But like. If some things had fallen just a little differently#And I keep thinking about how I’d feel if it were happening to Iraq and people behaved the way they’re doing to Palestinians#I’d be so mad#And some people on here are dealing w assholes while bursting at the seams w grief#For losing their loved ones#This is why I’m so fucking angry at anyone who’s complicit#This was a major tangent but basically I feel weird about doing normal things now while simultaneously knowing I can’t just sit and wallow#And watch life pass by as if it’ll do anything#Misery is not a home but I’m struggling to be 100% normal#And I think that this tonal dissonance is reflecting on my blog too bc I can’t go back to just#Posting about all the other normal things I used to. Like I want to but sometimes I feel off.#Is this anything. I haven’t slept all night#I can’t just allow myself to lose interest in everything I used to like and be and just fade away but maybe it’s about accepting that this#Will also always be a part of me now. It’s that awareness that shadows everything I do#or maybe I need a therapist it’s a toss up#I’ll probably feel better once I get my day started but this was cathartic to voice I think#p
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sonego · 3 days
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every time you see news about an athlete competing while injured and everyone's reactions are praising them like a hero bc that means they actually care about the team/sport/competition or whatever, imagine me as a dog barking at an evil creature in a horror movie. thanks
#the day we STOP glorifying pain i will finally know peace#try being in pain 24/7 !!!!! then tell me again it's a heroic and morally good !!!!!!! also fuck off#it's not heroic it's not good it's not manly it's not caring about winning what it IS is dangerous and reckless#and risking permanent damage and a disability#and i bet you fuckers would then start complaining about that same athlete 'underperforming' and 'not putting in enough effort' and shit#when maybe. MAYBE. if they'd taken care of the injury when it first arose that shit wouldn't have got worse and become a Big fucking problem#to be clear when i say you i mean a vague general you i see this all the time and rn it's aimed at no one in particular#and also i'm not blaming the athetles who keep competing through injuries i don't think it's their fault#i'm blaming these shit fucking reactions that everyone KEEPS having when it happens. pundits commentators fans etc#everyone is always praising these athletes these PEOPLE for how brave and daring they are for ignoring the pain they're in so they can help#the team or get a chance to win a race or a medal or a trophy or whatever#i understand it's not an easy or fun decision as a pro athlete to give up a chance at winning something#but i think we should DEFINITELY still encourage them to fucking give it up!!! even if it sucks even if it's a big win they're giving up!!#bc the risk of the injury getting worse and permanent and fucking up their career their LIFE for a very very long time if not forever is#just not worth it and not a risk to be taken lightly#i can't believe i have to keep complaining about this!!! still!!!!!! when will everyone learn!!!!!#what prompted this rant might not even be that bad but really i don't care the culture around this in sports needs to change asap#rant over i'm fucking MAD. and in pain (funnily enough lol)#nico.txt
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astranauticus · 7 months
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in light of the new episode this joke i made once is feeling a lot more relevant
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strrwbrrryjam · 3 months
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this is a dutch van der linde and micah bell hate club - dutch and micah defenders are not welcome here
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himbos-hotline · 2 months
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The fact that you continually misgender Adam Cole is fucking weird dude. It's not cute.
Tell me you haven't heard of a headcanon without telling me you haven't hward of a headcanon. Like-... damn sorry people are having fun-? Maybe get your head out your asshole anon. You really don't get to come into people's ask boxes with that kinda bullshit...wrestlers are playing a character. Dya know what the most common thing people do with characters? Make their own headcannons. Like sorry you don't like people writing trans people but I think that's a skill issue with you.
Also the adam cole in our system uss she/her pronouns. So if that's what you're bitching about. I'm not misgensering.
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oozeandgoo-art · 3 months
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had an odd dream that i was reading a comic book. sketched a couple of the pages i could remember.
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#i might adapt this into an actual story because i am SO SO SO mad that it isn't a thing i can go back to reading#oc#im definitely keeping the concept of save-bot i fucking love save-bot he's just doing his best. i love a robot who wants to help people#im not equipped to be writing about underground rebellions with any sense of real tact though#besides its in a superhero universe/story so you know it would just be so sucks lol#sketch#god the colors were so interesting. the teal parts were all very precisely crosshatched and the fire was this gorgeous brush pen looking#colored inks that just seemed like they were MOVING#and i mean some of that was because i was dreaming but god even in my halfhearted copy you can see some of the movement#it was a bad scene but a really really REALLY fun dream. i love when a book can *get* to me so i was really enjoying it#put it aside so i could take a break and woke up. instant fury at the universe for not having it be a real book instead#ill reblog with details if anyone's curious. i can explain this scene but i dont feel like it#the green people are in a secret basement though. hiding from the government. blue jacket guy is a speedster robot named save-bot who does#rescue stuff with every fire department so fire suppression technology is not very good because save-bot "can just save you''#however they're badly over their legal occupancy and the secret basement has One (1) exit so everyone is like really fucked here.#includinig save-bot who is going to do his job until he dies because he is an ai without any sense of self preservation and he cares#which i didn't even CATCH until i woke up and started tryin to frantically note everything down#and then i was like wait. the glitter on that last page before i realized i needed a glass of water to keep reading... what WAS that...#(it was tears suspended in midair because save-bot goes so fast and also knows he's so fucked LOL)#seriously i'm so mad someone else didn't make this.
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