#okay yeah matt murdock then we can like kiss and hold hands and stuff
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Make The World Quiet
Okay okay but hear me out,, mommy kink with Matty, okay?? I love him so much, and I know he'd rail me to pieces, but i also know that he needs to BE railed until he's all mushy and pliable (also given the fact that he slept with Jen i def think that she could hulk out and dom him and he would LIKE IT) so yeah here u guys go (Tags: Matt Murdock x Reader, mommy kink, slight edging, blowjob lol)
Matt feels like he’s dying.
He’s been on the brink of death before; stabbed in the stomach, gunshot wounds to the chest, being crushed under rubble. He knows what dying feels like.
But here, right now, with you? Nothing, nothing he’s ever experienced compares to this. Fuck, Matt doesn’t know if he’s going to make it out alive.
Your head has been between his thighs for what has to be an hour now, his hand buried in your pretty hair, dragging your lips up and down his dripping cock. From the position, you on your knees beside your shared bed while he sits atop it, Matt fucking your face, it seems like he has all the power. But Matt knows better. He knows you’re letting him do this; that you, even with your bruised knees and puffy lips, have control over him. Over his mind, his body, his fucking soul.
“Baby, baby, please let me cum,” he whimpers into the quiet of the room, the only sounds echoing in his ears are his little grunts and moans and your obscene slurping around the length of him. “Can’t hold it anymore, y’feel so good, sweetheart.”
But you pull off his cock as soon as the words leave his lips, leaving him aching again. The whine he lets out is demeaning, embarrassing, but you wrap your hand around his cock, jacking him slowly while Matt hears you giggle softly.
“My sweet boy, you’re gonna cum before you’ve even gotten my pussy?” You’re teasing him, you’ve been teasing him for the past few hours since he got home from work, and Matt hates that it’s working. “Come on baby, you want to be inside me? You’ve been so good.”
Matt nods frantically, unthinking and delirious. “Please, please let me have you baby? I need it so bad. Please sweetheart, ple-”
You quickly grab his chin, leaning down to whisper in his ear. “We both know that’s not what you want to call me right now, is it baby?” He whines again, but you shush him softly. “Ah, ah, come on. You can do it sweetheart. Whose pussy do you want right now? Tell me, honey.”
“Mommy,” Matt whispers softly, but you hear it, and Matt can feel your soft smile against his cheek.
“Good boy, baby,” you say, “lay back for me?” And Matt shoves himself backward, laying himself onto the soft silk sheets. He barely has a chance to prepare himself before you’re standing and straddling him, working the tip of his cock into your dripping cunt.
And Matt knows, he knows, that this is the closest he’ll get to heaven. You moan as you sink down onto him, tight pussy clenching as you work your hips, and Matt almost rips a hole into the sheets with the effort not to thrust up into you, not to fucking cum inside you, right then and there. He’s mumbling nearly incoherently, little praises of “Mommy, mommy, your pussy feels so good, you’re so tight, my love, so fucking warm, god.”
And you can’t help but think how pretty Matt looks, all flushed and red, nipples still puffy from how you played with them hours earlier, chest heaving with his labored breaths. You rock your hips against him, running your nails down his chest as Matt chokes on a moan.
“You’re so good, baby,” you say, and Matt keens under the praise. “Your cock is so big, sweet boy. Fills me up so good. You stuff me so full, Matty.”
“Please, mommy,” Matt groans, lips red and puffy from his biting.
“What, baby,” you ask, leaning down to nuzzle under his jaw, leaving soft kisses on his sensitive neck. You’re still grinding your hips, his balls and thighs all sticky from your sopping pussy. “What do you need, Matty?”
“I need, I need-” Matt stutters, struggling to take a breath. “I need to fuck you mommy. Oh god, please mommy, please let me fuck you? Need it so bad.”
Matt knows that it's a long shot, that you could easily refuse him, and he’d let you, just as he’s been letting you refuse him for hours. But you grin between the kisses you’re leaving on his neck, your hips finally coming to a stop. “You’ve been so good, my sweet baby. Come on, baby, you can fuck me.”
Matt doesn’t need to be told twice.
Matt tries not to mourn the loss of you around his cock as he slips out of you, quickly rolling you over. He slots himself between your spread thighs, shoving himself back into your gaping cunt, relishing in the pretty moan you let out. Matt’s eyes roll into the back of his head, a sharp gasp escaping his throat at the overwhelming heat of you.
He bucks into you uncontrollably, slamming into your pretty cunt with reckless abandon. He tucks his head into the crook of your neck, hips working endlessly into you, balls slapping against your ass as he mouths at your soft skin.
Your nails are digging into his back as he ruts into your pussy, punching little ah, ah, ahs, out of your chest with every thrust.
Matt’s world is beautifully, blissfully silent, save for the sound of your skin slapping together, your pretty little moans, and your quick, overwhelmed heartbeat. Matt knows that that’s why you do this, take control, even though he fights it. He’s always the one in control, always the one calling the shots, at work and as Daredevil, except for when he’s with you like this. You mold his mind for him, take control of his senses, allow him to fall into this delirious state, drunk on your pussy.
You clench so fucking tight around his cock when you cum, a garbled “Matty, fuck, oh god-” leaving your lips as your hips shake and your vision goes white.
Matt is just babbling feverishly into your neck, a long string of “Thank you, mommy, thank you, oh god. Love your pussy, thank you for giving me your pussy, y’always make me feel so good, shit-” and he’s cumming, thick cum shooting deep into your pussy, all while he thanks you.
He doesn’t let you go for a long time, his strong arms wrapped around you as he twitches with the aftershock of his orgasm. You run a calming hand down his back, lightly tracing his scars while you wait for him to breathe normally again. You praise him softly, whispering into his hair, “You did so good, Matty, my sweet boy. Made me feel so good baby, you’re so perfect.”
After a few minutes, Matt slips himself out of your pussy and rolls over again, keeping you wrapped tight in his arms.
“Thank you, baby,” Matt murmurs, and you smile.
“You’re welcome, Matty,” you say, and Matt can feel the warmth of your smile. He can’t hold back a grin of his own. You close your eyes, nuzzling into Matt’s chest as you say, “I love you, Matt.”
“I love you too, sweetheart,” Matt whispers back, smiling softly to himself when he hears your breathing even out, snoring gently. Matt isn’t far behind, falling asleep quickly with the world warm and comforting and still blissfully silent.
#matt murdock x you#matt murdock#matt murdock smut#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x fem!reader#matt murdock x y/n#daredevil x you#daredevil smut#daredevil x reader
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|| Engagement ||
Matt Murdock x gn reader
Tags/warnings: mild angst, mild smut, meta, sorry not sorry I had to!!! 😂
As always, I adore and appreciate any comments, reblogs, etc and I'm extremely thankful to you for reading my fics!
~
Matt's arms tighten around you as you lie snuggled up together in bed. He can pick up on your disconnected mood from your elevated heart rate and the way he hears your breathing change every time you think about saying something and then stop yourself.
"You know you can talk to me, if something's wrong." He says quietly.
You take a deep inhale, sighing it out as you nuzzle into his t-shirt at his shoulder. "I know," you reply, choosing to ignore the invitation to unload.
He pushes a little harder in response. "Sweetie, you've been off for a while now, you think I hadn't noticed?"
"Urgh. It's stupid."
He turns his head to kiss you on the top of your head, giving you another squeeze. "I'm sure it's not, and talking about might help? If you want."
You huff out another sigh. "I dunno, I've kind of talked it over with others but it doesn't seem to make any difference. I'm not sure it's something I can fix."
Concern washes over Matt's features. "Is– is it something I've done? Or not done?" He gently takes your face in his hands. "Sweetheart, you'd tell me if it was me wouldn't you? I'd want you to."
You smile, bringing your hand up to stroke through his soft, messy hair. "Of course I would, and no it's nothing you've done, so don't fret."
The worry melts from his brow. "Alright, but c'mon, try me. I'm sure we can do something about whatever it is that's got you down."
"Well… it's work related. I'm not getting anywhere near as much feedback on my stuff as I used to. You know how in the creative sector we kinda thrive on others sharing our work to bring it to the attention of others? I've been feeling for a while now that the sense of community that we had has just sort of disappeared. People don't seem to want to interact that much with what we make."
Matt groans. "Baby, is this about the lack of reblogs on Tumblr again? "
You can't help frowning. "It is." You admit.
He smiles and rolls over to cage you underneath him. "I could make you forget about it, for a while at least?"
"Matty!" You push him off with a frustrated sigh. "Are you honestly trying to distract me with sex? You know how important this is to me."
"I know, I'm sorry. I don't mean to trivialise the issue, I just thought I could take your mind off it, maybe make you feel better."
"So kind and selfless of you…" you smirk as he starts to kiss along the column of your neck.
"I try." He smiles. "Anyway, you were saying? And I'm gonna keep kissing you."
"Fine. Okay, so I know that I should create for myself and not for other people…"
"But it's nice to get some recognition, right?" You nod as Matt holds himself over you again continuing to make his way down your neck towards your collarbones.
"Right. I really do appreciate the likes, but if people are just 'liking' my work without sharing it, that means it just ends up dead in the water. No-one else really gets the chance to enjoy it."
"Any idea why they are not sharing?" Matt asks, lightly stroking your side.
"I dunno, maybe they're not familiar with how the site works, that it doesn't have an algorithm? Maybe they're embarrassed to let other people see what they're looking at? Especially if it's something a bit risqué."
Matt hums. "Yeah but didn't you tell me before that they could just create a sideblog that's not associated with their main account, and reblog things they like using that and no one would be any wiser?'
"Exactly! And anyway, it's not like everyone doesn't enjoy looking at and reading porn…"
Matt lifts his head up, a slight sly smile pulling up the corner of his mouth. "Mm true. So what else are you sad about?"
You sigh again. You can't seem to stop yourself.
"Well, people aren't commenting on works either. There's rarely any discussion, I mean even just a manic keyboard smash would be amazing for an artist to see in their notifications, but there's barely even that anymore. Commenting on a stranger's fan works is so much fun, it can really bring people together!"
"That's how a great community grows isn't it?" Matt asks you.
"Yep, and you end up making so many friends you would never have thought. I miss that aspect of it a lot."
Matt's swiftly moving down to lavish attention over your chest, and you momentarily lose your train of thought as his lips brush over your nipple. "And have you brought people's attention to this problem?"
"Of course! Many other creators have explained why reblogs and sharing are so important in eloquently written PSAs, but I guess that the target audience must not see them because they're perhaps only looking at the stories and fanart from tags and they maybe don't see the other dashboard posts. I dunno."
Matt starts to lick an achingly slow intimate path down your stomach and you feel heat spreading throughout your body, your heart rate now elevated for quite a different reason. Then suddenly, he stops.
"Have you thought about maybe incorporating the message into one of your creations? Maybe that might reach the intended audience better."
You close your eyes as you consider the idea. He shifts further down the bed and you allow him to spread your thighs apart and slot his shoulders inbetween.
"Mm, well… that's- actually that's a good idea. I mean, it can't hurt to try, can it? You're the devil on my shoulder Matty."
"Exactly. But leave it till tomorrow sweetheart. Right now this devil wants to make you feel good."
You bite down on your lip as he flashes you a smoldering look before ducking down to make good on his promise.
#matt murdock x you#matt murdock x gender neutral reader#matt murdock x reader#daredevil x reader#matt murdock smut#reblog fics and art!!!#comment on stuff!#make friends and keep the community going! 😊#thank you thank you!
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SLEEPOVER CELEBRATION YAY!!! Thanks so much for tagging me, love! Can I request "You're more than a fling" with our lovely Matt Murdock? Please and thank you?!
thank YOU for the submission darling 💕 ok ok ok starting friday night fever with my MAN matthew murdock let’s gooooooo!
🔥friday night fever!🔥
You genuinely wonder if Matt knows how handsome he is.
Like, he must know, right? He’s not immune to the attention, not deaf to the compliments that follow him around wherever he goes, and you know for a fact he’s no newbie when it comes to dating. Not that the list is long, but he’s…experienced. And good-looking, and charming, and the list goes on and on. Matt’s not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but being gorgeous goes a long way.
And being an absolute fucking angel in bed helps too.
He must know something, you think, but you genuinely wish it didn’t get to you so hard.
It’s been a few months, a couple dates that have each lasted more than twenty-four hours. You hadn’t planned to put out on the first date, stigma and all that, but when one glass of wine turned into two and the first kiss made you feel like your blood was on fire, that was that. And the silk sheets? Added bonus.
So you’re…something. You don’t really know what you are, and you’re loathe to admit you’re too nervous to ask Matt, to have the ‘conversation’ about what you both want, what you both think about how things are going. If he asked you, you know what you’d say, but the fear of his response is holding you back.
And right now, fear be damned, you’re just annoyed.
Josie’s is full of people, like any other Friday night, the bar littered with patrons and the pool tables full to burst. Karen and Foggy were here at one point, but they said their goodbyes three beers ago. You, on the other hand, have been sat at the table across from Matt, watching the trio of women at the bar ogle him over their shoulders, whispering and pointing to each other. You stuff a few peanuts in your mouth, trying not to huff too audibly as one of them wanders over, all smiles and big eyes and “my friends at the bar dared me to…”. It makes your stomach turn, the embarrassment that you can’t just find the courage to ask, forcing you to keep your mouth shut.
And Matt, ever the gentleman, brushes them off politely with a smile. “Have a good night.”
After the third time, you can’t keep the exasperation under wraps any longer, and slam your beer onto the table a little too loudly. Matt flinches, face turning towards you, brow furrowing on his face. “You okay?”
You give a short sigh, breathing through your nose, and rub the back of your neck. “Yeah, fine.”
His head tilts to the side slowly, a tiny grin twitching the corner of his mouth. “Say it like you mean it.” Laughing, you shake your head, sipping the beer again, but Matt pushes. “C’mon, talk to me.”
“What are we?”
You could cut the tension that hangs in the air with a knife. The words fall out too quickly, your heart picking up in your chest as you lean forward on your elbows, chewing your lip furiously as you watch the words sink in. The smile disappears, those full lips parting gently, and he leans back in his seat, hand curled around his beer bottle.
“What are we?” he echoes, and you feel like you might explode.
You suck back the rest of the beer, leaning into the liquid courage. “Yes, Matthew. You and me. This. Us. What is this?”
His brow is still pulled down, and his jaw twitches. “What do you think this is?”
“I don’t know!” you cry, the exasperation and fear bubbling over again. “Like…am I just a fling, or what? Cuz I know you have a line-up of women drooling over you and I just—”
Matt leans forward, curling his fingers around your wrist, squeezing lightly before he’s pushing his hand up along your forearm and settling in the crook of your elbow. “I don’t give a shit about any of them, you know that, right?” he asks. “Are you…” He brushes his thumb along the thin skin. “You’re more than a fling. God, sweetheart, you’re so much more than that.”
You just stare at him, frozen.
He stands from his seat, rounding the table quickly and grabbing your face in his hands. You’re breathless, tilting your head back as he lowers his face to yours. He kisses you roughly, hot and wet, tongue sliding past your teeth, the both of you tasting like beer and shots of tequila. It’s a possessive kiss, his body pushing forward when your hands land on his hips, fingers hooking into the waist of his pants. His knuckles lock in your hair, tugging just enough to leave you desperate for more.
“C’mon,” he murmurs as he pulls back just slightly, moving his lips to your cheek and leaving a lingering kiss there. “Let me take you home, show you just what you are to me, hmm?”
You just nod, whispering a soft yes as he reaches for his cane and coat at his chair, grabbing your hand and heading for the door.
The trio of women at the bar are watching you as you go, their jaws dropped, the expressions on their faces telling you they just saw the kiss, and you just smile, following Matt into the night.
—————
I have a taglist! if you’d like to be tagged in future works, please fill out this form!💕
matt murdock tags: @saintmurd0ck @lazyxsquirrel @moonlarking @mindidjarin @freshabogados @steadyasthe-flowers @whosfrankie @ancientbeing10 @plutoneu @grounderprincesslookspissed @hoewkeyesblue @simple_lovebot @glowstick-lesbian @itwasthereaminuteago @williamjzanders @e-dubbc11 @lunarpenumbra @minxsblog @bluestuesday @eatommo @a-zterisk @randomwords3000 @i-simp-much @kirsteng42 @loonymagizoologist @pariahsparadise @greeneyedblondie44 @sparklysandstorm @dead-pool-simp @ruhro7 @alyona-romanova @dropsofprecipitation @peterman-spideyparker @hellskitchenswhore @inthehouse0fflies @shadowzena43 @arson-tm @apageinthecastle @december16-1991 @urmomdotcom5678 @pastafossa @dropsofprecipitation @m00nkn1ghts @andrewlovebot @trickstersp8 @a-hopeless-fan @dracosluvbot @billyhargrovesprincess @detectivecarisi-1 @idrinkcoffeeandobsess
#friday night fever#matt murdock#murdock#my fics#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#daredevil#daredevil x reader#daredevil x you#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock imagine
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no offence @h-isforhiatus but I would bring matt murdock to life so I could kiss him, u have fun tho
#or tristan thorn but thats onky bc im on q charlie cox kick rn#tristan would be soo fun bc hes like a literal king ! 😀... to a country that doesnt exist 😓#okay yeah matt murdock then we can like kiss and hold hands and stuff#but yeah sorry h but u can bring ANYONE to life and u choose someone to KILL!?!#insanity#what abt the good hot seb stan that lived in ur brain#u dont want him to be real!?!?@#indanity
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Clean | Matt Murdock x fem!reader
summary: you wake up to matt stumbling and you clean up his wounds
pairing: matt murdock x fem!reader
warnings: mention of blood/cuts, fluff
wc: 687 (short blurb)
masterlist
matt murdock hubby hubby ;) trying new header ideas idk yet
The sound of something being knocked over woke you up from your deep sleep. As your eyes fluttered open you could tell it was probably the middle of the night. Blackout curtains blocked the windows in front of the bed you and matt shared so you could sleep without the big bright billboard blinding you every night. Moving your head, you noticed matt wasn’t in bed and never shown up as his side barely had an impact of him. Standing up you walked to the door sliding it open to the open floor plan of the small apartment. Matt laid on the couch breathing heavily holding his side. He sensed you immediately.
“Sorry didn’t mean to wake you. I accidentally tripped coming inside.” he closed his eyes trying to calm down his adrenaline from the night
“it’s okay,” you made your way towards your boyfriend and sat next to him. he felt your presence as you moved your hand to lift the black sweater he was wearing, and Matt moved his hand as you inspected a few cuts on the side of his body. the side of his face blood from a cut on the top of his forehead
“didn’t hear or sense the knife in the guy's hand-“ you cut him off as you dabbed his shit over the biggest cut that probably needed stitches
“Sorry, let me get my stuff.” standing up before he could protest you walked into your shared bathroom getting what you like to call ‘matt kit’ for all his needs when he comes home hurt. checking there were enough supplies, you grabbed two hand towels and headed back out of the living room to take care of matt
“you should go back to bed, I can do this.” rolling your eyes playfully at him you smiled
“We both know you can’t. now just sit back and let me do this.” you opened the kit pouring rubbing alcohol on one of the rags and brought it up to the cuts on his chest. matt took an inhale of a breath-holding in the sound of how much it hurt “sorry.” he shook his head letting you continue your work on him. doing the same with the other towel you cleaned his face and the small cut. moving along, you took some numbing cream spreading it around the big cut you needed to stitch up. “ready?”
“Yeah, can I hold your leg or something like a stress ball.” moving you sat with one of your legs across his lap and sat back on the other under your butt. bringing the needle and stitch up to his cut you entered the skin and matt hissed squeezing your thigh. You tried your best to hurry because you hate seeing him hurt.
“almost done baby.” making sure you were doing a good job you did the last stitch and cut it as you finished. “done.” leaning up to kiss his cheek matt smiled softly at the gesture
You took another part of the towel and poured more rubbing alcohol on it for the other small cuts. Tending them you just rubbed them softly. Grabbing gauze you asked matt to sit up so you could wrap it around his body. Moving the soft white protector around his body you taped it to him.
“need anything else?” he massaged your thigh the whole time loving the feeling of your freshly shaved legs
“Just you.” he turned his head making you look into his beautiful eyes that you could stare at forever. “bed?”
“yes please,” standing up first you helped matt up as he wrapped an arm around you for support to the shared room. He separated from you to go to his side of the bed getting under the covers. You moved to cuddle against him as he held your body against him missing your touch of the day
“thank you, I love you,” he whispered into the darkness
“I’ll always be here. I love you.” kissing his neck softly you laid back down to fall back into a deep sleep knowing matt was okay and in your arms.
#matt murdock smut#matt murdock x you#matt murdock x y/n#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x fem!reader#matt murdock one shot#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock
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if you ever go
matt murdock x reader
masterlist ☆
this one’s kinda short!
summary: after a day at work you, foggy, karen, and matt go out for the night. not knowing that everything would suddenly change.
this is inspired by some videos that i watched about how matt would react to the blip happening!! kinda rushed bc it’s 3am so if there are mistakes i’m sorry!
also inspired (sorta) by the song like you do by joji bc i was listening to it as i wrote this
matt let out a yawn as he stood to grab his jacket to get ready to leave the office.
the four of you had planned to go out today, deciding that it’ll be good to get out more instead of being in the building so much.
you were all walking out the building, heading towards josies.
matt felt your arm wrap around his, he knew that you already knew that he didn’t need it. he smiled anyways, loving the feeling of your closeness.
he moved his arm down and grabbed your hand in his own, feeling your face heat up even though you both held hands frequently.
“okay lovebirds, no need to rub your love all over our faces, alright. we’re here, so let’s get drunk!” foggy opened the door as we walked in, shutting it behind us.
“i’ll go get the drinks for us!” karen went to order as the rest of us found our usual spot to sit at.
soon after karen came back with the drinks, situating herself beside foggy.
“this is nice right guys? all of us, together. we should do it more often again.” foggy took a large sip from his drink and set it back down.
you laughed, “yeah, we really should.” you took a sip from your own glass as you felt matt rest one of his arms at the back of your chair, seeing him smile to himself.
after having a few more drinks you all decided to play a couple of rounds at the pool table.
“i don’t understand how you keep beating me.” sighing in defeat, foggy rubbed his face with his hands, shaking his head.
“sorry foggy, maybe i just have good luck.” matt leaned on the pool table, holding the pool stick in between his legs.
“or maybe it’s those freaky super abilities of yours.” foggy said as he let out a yawn.
“maybe y/n is just too good of a teacher.” karen said, who sat at a table close to where we were at.
matt smiled, “maybe it’s time to go. it’s pretty late and foggy’s close to falling asleep standing.”
upon hearing matt’s words, foggy shook his head to keep himself awake.
“what?! not true. i’m wide awake right now. but yes, i say it’s pretty late too.”
you guys gathered all of your stuff together and got ready to leave for the night.
“matt, do you want to stay over tonight? you can come over once you’re done.. doing what you do.”
as you all waited for karen to come back from the bathroom, you all sat at your previous spots, matt wrapping an arm around your waist, your head on his shoulder, feeling tired.
“i will.” he kissed the top of your head as karen made her way back to you guys.
“alright then, ready to go.” she said.
as you were all ready to walk out the door, people start to scream. you felt matt’s hold on you become tighter.
“what’s going on?” his senses couldn’t figure out what was happening.
he tried to focus on the people around him but it’s like the bar that once was filled with people just.. disappeared.
he tried to hear the hearts of them, but they were just gone. his own starting to become frantic, he moved quickly as he lead you out of josies, foggy and karen following.
“what did you see? what’s happening in there?” matt demanded, but it’s like you were all in shock.
“they all just.. they- disappeared. just became dust.” you sounded out of breath, you couldn’t understand what was happening, what was happening?
matt felt you look over at karen, feeling your horror.
no. no. no, no.
“karen.” you stepped closer to her, the three of you trying to make sense of what was occurring.
“y/n.” she looked over at foggy, at you, at matt. at her hands and body that were disappearing.
you tried to keep your composure. hugging her tightly, the feeling of her arms equally returning the force, a feeling that suddenly wasn’t there in matter of seconds.
matt stood in shock, foggy as well.
they were soon knocked back to there senses as they realized you were breaking down.
matt kneeled to your side, foggy placing a hand to your back.
“she- she’ll be back right? what is this? what’s causing this?”
foggy let out a choked sob, the three of you in a group hug over where the fourth would have been standing only a minute ago.
“foggy,” matt tilted his head over to where his best friend is, moving over to him.
“i’m not imaging this right?” foggy whispered.
you looked over at him, seeing his arm gone, shaking your head.
with his other arm he wrapped it around matt, trying to stay. but just like karen, he was gone.
matt’s breathing was irregular at this point, he reached for you.
you scooted over to him, letting him wrap his arms around you tightly once again.
being in each other’s embrace, afraid one or the other will be next to leave.
matt having his senses overloaded, heading the screaming, the crashes, the heartbeats.
he couldn’t lose you too. he couldn’t, he can’t.
he leaned his head further into the crook of your neck, breathing you in and feeling your body shake from being terrified and crying, your grip on him tight.
“matt, we’ll be okay.” he heard your voice and he only slightly moved his head up to where he knew you could see him.
his breathing became more even as he listened to your beating heart, rapid, but still familiar and calming.
he felt your grip loosening, your heart evening out.
he tried to force himself it was you just calming down.
he felt you move your hands up to his face, giving him a sweet kiss, him immediately reciprocating.
“we’ll be okay.” your voice was shaky, choked up with tears.
matt started to tremble, no, not you too. he already lost everyone else.
reaching for your frame, what was left of you, his senses feeling you slowly drift away, “i love you, please, don’t leave.”
he was crying now, trying to stop wherever was happening, but knowing he can’t.
“i love you too, matt.”
he kissed your forehead, grabbing onto your hands that still were on his face.
suddenly he felt nothing, your presence was gone, like you were never there, he was grabbing into nothing.
the familiar beat of your heart and breathing that once calmed him amid the chaos, gone.
he sat alone on the sidewalk, feeling everything around him once again now that you’re gone.
still everything the same, running, screaming, everything and everyone in panic.
he felt himself feel light, the sounds around him becoming distant.
then he felt his own body becoming dust.
his breath became irregular once again. feeling himself disappear, until he felt nothing.
#fanfiction#marvel#angst#fluff#katstarry#marvel fanfiction#matt murdock x y/n#matt murdock x you#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#daredevil#karen page#foggy nelson#the blip#infinity war
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some brief dirty talk stuff i had to scrap from something else
The first time Matt says fuck in front of Foggy, it’s a few months into freshman year and he had just stubbed his toe on Foggy’s desk. They’re both silent for a beat before Foggy says, “Language,” and bursts out laughing at the dry look Matt shoots him.
“Fuck you,” Matt says, lips twitching.
“Sorry,” Foggy says, grinning back. “I’ve just never heard you say that before. I’m shocked.”
“Nuns don’t like it when you swear,” Matt says, limping a little back to his bed and sitting on the edge of it. “I’m not practiced in it.”
“Well, feel free to let loose around me, Murdock,” Foggy says. “I like a dirty mouth.”
Matt looks surprised for a moment and Foggy lets his words swing back around to him. Someday, he will stop uninentionally flirting with Matt. Surely.
“I mean—I like—colorful language,” Foggy says, weakly.
“I got you,” Matt says, laughing. “I’ll keep that in mind for the future.”
Someday, Foggy will also stop daydreaming about a future with Matt.
. . .surely.
*
Foggy only almost walks in on Matt having sex with someone a couple of times—always stopping before he actually turns the dooorknob, thank God—but the last time he kind of lingers. He shouldn’t linger. It’s absolutely weird that he lingers. But nonetheless, he catches the sound of Matt’s voice and leans into the door, breath catching when he hears Matt say a string of absolutely filthy things.
Like—if the nuns heard him, he’d probably be excommunicated. That level of filthy.
He stays until he hears her gasp out that she’s going to come, which is enough of a wakeup call that he immediately starts walking and doesn’t stop until he doesn’t have an erection anymore.
He’s gathered from gossip and just—his entire existence that Matt’s probably pretty good in bed but he really didn’t need to know the specifics.
More specifically, he didn’t need to know exactly how much he wanted to be that girl.
*
Kissing Matt is an experience. Sweet and chaste for a couple of minutes before Foggy’s helpless to do much but get a hand in Matt’s hair and hold on—like he’s kissing a tornado or some other inadequate metaphor. The first time is senior year of undergrad, when Matt’s single and they’re basically attached at the hip studying for the LSATs and it seems like the best moment for Foggy to stutter out a confession.
Matt had a good reaction.
He’s basically in bed with Matt before he realizes it but Matt slows down before they get undressed, says, “I want to fuck you—is that okay?” and grins wickedly when Foggy says, “Yes, please.”
“You want me to fuck you, Foggy?” he asks, voice dipping a little lower.
“Yeah, Matty,” Foggy says. “It’s been kind of a life goal of mine.”
“Well, thanks for being so patient,” Matt says, kissing him on the forehead before he pulls Foggy’s shirt over his head. “I think I can make it worth the wait.”
*
“You fucking love this, don’t you?” Matt says, practically a growl, when he’s buried inside of Foggy and Foggy has his legs wrapped around his waist.
“Yeah,” Foggy gasps. “Yeah, Matty.”
“I’ve heard you before,” Matt says. “I almost walked in on you and that guy you were hooking up with--last year.”
“I’m kind of loud,” Foggy says, sheepishly.
“I wanted to join in,” Matt says, barely moving his hips, running his hands up Foggy’s chest to pin his shoulders down. “Or--kick him out so I could have you to myself. I figured out a lot about myself all at once from hearing you get fucked.”
“Oh my god,” Foggy says, laughing and squirming under him a little bit just to feel Matt put more weight on him. “I confirmed that I was dying for you to fuck me after I heard you fucking the life out of a girl a couple of years ago.”
“Wow, we’ve wasted a lot of time,” Matt says, laughing, “that we could’ve spent with you underneath me.”
“Speaking of,” Foggy says, lifting his hips as much as he can to feel, “are you gonna fuck me or what?”
“Well. . .if you beg me for it,” Matt says, smiling down at him.
"Oh, yeah?” Foggy asks.
“Yeah,” Matt murmurs, leaning down to kiss him messily. “Beg for my dick.”
“Oh fuck,” Foggy says, panting. “Matty, please. Fuck me.”
Matt pulls out and then thrusts back in roughly, pushing Foggy up the bed and startling a broken moan out of him.
“You want it hard, Fog?” Matt asks, like he clearly knows the answer.
“Yeah, fuck me hard,” Foggy says. “Please.”
“How loud do you think you can get before somebody complains to an RA?” Matt asks, finally starting to really fuck him, hiking Foggy’s legs up higher around him.
"Uhm. . .why?” Foggy asks, barely able to get one syllable words out already..
Matt grinds his hips against him before he says, “Because I’m gonna make you scream. I just wanted you to be ready.”
“. . .yeah, okay,” Foggy breathes.
*
“I have no bones,” Foggy says, later that night.
“That’s normal,” Matt says, grinning at him as he climbs back into bed to pull Foggy close.
“After being fucked by you?” Foggy asks. “There are side effects?”
“No bones,” Matt says, kissing his forehead. “General--soreness.”
“Yeah, I’m feeling some of that,” Foggy says. “I don’t hate it.”
"May ruin you for other men,” Matt says, yawning.
“Your ego,” Foggy says, pressing a kiss to Matt’s chest, “is even bigger than your dick.”
“. . .keep talking,” Matt says, happily, tightening his arms around him.
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Hands Too Cold, but Heart of Gold - Pt.8 (M.M.)
The Date
Pairing: Matt Murdock x reader, onde-sided Steve Rogers x reader
Word count: 3850
Summary: Avenger!reader AU, love triangle. You go out with Matt Murdock and to your own surprise, it doesn’t end up a disaster. Quite the opposite.
Warnings: swearing, fluff, angst
Story Mastelist
────── ·❆· ──────
“I honestly don’t know why I’m freaking out about my outfit. He won’t even be able to see it! Why am I freaking out, Tasha?” you asked her on a verge of desperation, smoothening your dress for the millionth time.
As you got to the hem of the dress, all you wanted to do was to pull it over your head and change. Again. You stared at your reflection in the mirror, honestly considering it.
Natasha, standing behind you, put her hands on your shoulders to keep you in place and raised her eyebrow.
“Hey. You have every right to be nervous. How long has it been since your last date?” she asked gently, surprisingly so for a super-spy.
You bit your lip guiltily – of course, she found the root of the trouble. It had been too freaking long. The fact you were going out with Matt – an amazing human being – was not helping to sooth your nerves either.
“Almost two years.”
“Well. I think you’re entitled. But you’re gonna be fine,” she reassured you and you caught her honest gaze in the mirror. She squeezed your shoulders. “That guy? He fell hard – I hope you figured that out already. Just be yourself and you’ll be fine.”
You took a deep breath. “Thanks, Tasha. I really should go or I’ll be late. The taxi might even be here already.”
You picked up your coat, leaving the dresses you didn’t even want to count – Natasha had supplied you with too many of hers and still, you took the only dress you owned yourself – and grabbed your purse on the way.
You were insanely grateful to Natasha for her help – yet, your heart was fluttering nervously and ached a little. You wished Steve was here too, but you understood this was more of a ladies thing. You were sure he wished you the best for your date even if you hadn’t heard him say it.
You opened the door only to meet with Steve’s surprised face. His eyes measured you from head to toe and you fought the urge to hide – god knew why. That was until his gaze returned to your face and a smile appeared on his lips.
“You look beautiful, Snowflake,” he whispered, checking you out shamelessly once more. “He’s a lucky guy.”
You bit your lip, feeling the rush of heat colouring your cheeks. You lowered your gaze, examining your shoes; they had heels, you were about to kill yourself in them, why were you wearing them again…?
Steve chuckled at your reaction. You couldn’t help but feel like there was something foreign in that supposedly happy sound, something you couldn’t decode.
A hand appeared under your chin, fingers tucking a strand of your hair that fell in your face behind your ear. He kissed your forehead lovingly and you inhaled deeply, trying to calm down your rapidly beating heart. You knew he was trying to help, but it didn’t really work.
“Hey, Snowflake. Hold your head high, you look wonderful. It’s gonna be fine. If he upsets you, you not only can let him go, but you have five– no, six pissed off friends actually, I’m sure Thor would stop by for that – to punch Matt in his face. Understood?”
That finally made you relax and the tension in your shoulders eased with a huffed laughter. Steve’s eyes twinkled for a moment and you couldn’t but laugh again.
“Did you just say ‘pissed off’?” you asked incredulously and Steve shrugged it off – except a hint of a blush appeared in his cheeks too and hell, you could not miss that. You feasted your eyes on his embarrassment and only then gave Captain Language a proper hug, which was reciprocated tightly.
“I guess I’m nervous for you that much,” he murmured over your shoulder and the statement melted your heart.
“Thank you, Steve.”
He squeezed your waist once more, caressed your back and released you from his embrace, uneasy smile on his lips.
“Go. We wouldn’t want you to be late.”
You just nodded and made your way to the elevator. You sparred one more glance at Natasha, who joined Steve in the hallway, couple of dressed folded over her forearm. She grinned at you.
“Not to make you nervous, Frosty, but just because he won’t be able to see you with his eyes, it doesn’t mean he won’t appreciate your appearance! And other stuff! Considering all of his senses are heightened!” she called after you and you felt you face turning into a mask of horror.
All of his senses. Shit. What perfume did you use? How much could he— would he be able to tell you hugged-- did Steve just hug you to make Matt jealous and possibly make him think you were wanted, so he would value the fact you were going out with him more?
No, wait, you were the one who hugged Steve, which--- this was so going to be a disaster. You whined and slid into your coat, hoping it would make you invisible. And undetectable in any other way. This evening started swimmingly…
With you going down in the elevator, Natasha and Steve were left alone.
“Smooth, Rogers. Very subtle,” the spy exclaimed, patting his arm patronizingly. Steve shot her an unreadable glare.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“About the fact Mr. Hot and Devilish wouldn’t even have to make her unhappy. It’s him making her happy that you want to punch him in the face for.”
Steve grinded his teeth, his look turning murderous. “That’s not true. I want them to get together.”
“Sure,” she agreed, shrugging. “That’s why you marked your territory like a goddamned dog.”
The rush of irritation and shame at being caught hit him stronger than excepted. Natasha knew exactly how to push his buttons and it drove him crazy.
“I didn’t-“ he protested lamely, only to realize he indeed hadn’t. “She was the one who hugged me.”
“Yeah. Keep yourself telling that. She did hug you, but what happened before that, that was on you. I’m surprised you didn’t kiss her on her mouth. I don’t understand how one can be so blind— eh, sorry-”
Steve’s hands curled into fists and he paced to his room to change into something more suitable for workout. He needed to punch something and as much as he was pissed at Natasha for mocking him, he liked her too much to hurt her – the punching bags would have to suffice. Bags, definitely plural, because he would tear some today, no doubt.
“Have a good workout, big guy!” she shouted after him almost cheerily and he slammed the door with such force that dust of plastering snowed down around the doorway.
Snowed down. Fuck. That would be more than one ruined bag today.
────── ·❆· ──────
Entering the restaurant was one of the scariest things you had ever done. But the friendly space welcomed you, soft lights illuminating the room, white clothing on the tables, each with a candle on it, several people talking rather lowly. You gulped looking around – probably forgetting everything Natasha had taught you about subtle observation, because the hostess spotted you immediately and walked to you, assuming you were completely lost.
“Good evening. Do you have a reservation, madam? Are you meeting anyone here? Or I am going to look for a table for one?” she asked politely, professionalism never leaving her face.
You gulped. “Uhm… meeting someone actually. There should be a reservation for seven o’clock under the name Murdock?”
“Of course. Mr. Murdock is waiting for you. Follow me.”
‘Waiting for you?’ You were five minutes early! You were kinda hoping you would have time to calm your nerves-
Matt probably knew about you the second you entered the restaurant – still, it surprised you when he rose as you approached the table and pulled out your chair for you to sit down before helping you from your coat.
“Hi, Matt,” you greeted him unsurely, obediently sitting down. “Thank you.”
If he wouldn’t have stood up, you wouldn’t have recognized him – or at least it would take you a while. He wore a nice-fitting black suit with white shirt and crimson tie – not something you were used to; the only outfit you had seen him in was either his armour or the shirt he wore in the hospital, where you hadn’t really paid attention.
His face was partly hidden behind a pair of round red-toned glasses, making you feel like you were meeting a completely different person. You had already met Daredevil, you had met Matt, you supposed, and now you were meeting Mr. Murdock. Though the colour of his tie and glasses was a hint, sending a vibe of familiarity towards you.
“Your waitress will be here shortly,” the hostess announced, barely noticed.
Matt smiled at you. “Hi. Glad you could make it.”
You inhaled sharply. Was your nervousness that evident?
“Yeah. Yeah, me too. It… it was… okay, uhm, I guess you can tell I got hugged profusely. By Steve. And Nat. I was… nervous. Sorry,” you mumbled, watching the flame of the candle flicker as you exhaled. “It’s been a while since I was… out.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said, his tone surprisingly soothing. It worked for you, okay. “It’s been a while for me too.”
That made you snap your head up.
“Really?” you blurted out. “I mean… you just seem like a guy who…”
He tilted his head, his eyebrow rising in challenge. “…yes?”
“Oh god, no I didn’t mean like…” You whined silently. Now it sounded as if you were saying he was a manwhore.
“I’m waiting for you to finish that sentence. Are you suggesting something?” he teased you and it ignited the flame of banter-queen that had revealed herself while on the mission with the Devil.
“I’m suggesting that you seem like a guy who can’t complain about the lack of attention from women – possibly men. I don’t know where your train of thought headed…”
He grinned, impressed and possibly satisfied with himself; he had every right. You found the uneasy sensation in your stomach resolve as you stepped into a more familiar territory of teasing. And with him grinning, damn, he was a handsome little shit.
“Thanks. I do have a rich nightlife, but…”
“Right. I can understand that there are different kinds of nightlife.”
“Exactly. Sneaking from bed every night doesn’t work well. And loading every potential partner with why I do it… it’s not that easy.”
“I’m sorry,” you whispered and Matt just shook his head.
“It’s my choice. I’m glad you’re here and we have this part out of our way.”
You bit your lip as he gave you yet another smile, this time softer. “I’m glad too. But are you suggesting there’s more?”
He chuckled dryly. “Well. Of course there is, but we can work with that later. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has some things that are important, yet not the best thing to discuss on the first date.”
The flutter of your heart caused by the mention of heavy baggage on your side turned into an excited one as you were reminded this was your first date – with a great man, who was as badass and cocky as he seemed understanding, sweet and gallant.
“Yeah. You think wine would help?”
“Absolutely.”
────── ·❆· ──────
The wine did help. You two made it through why you hadn’t been on a date for a while, which featured your struggle with the disease and you ‘dying’ and joining the Avengers. To balance the heaviness, you mentioned few stunts your friends in the Tower had pulled so far.
Matt told you about his best friend finding about his nightlife, but also about the work they did in their little firm with big ambitions, throwing in stories from college.
You laughed, your cheeks hurt and your belly too, your body was pleasantly buzzing and you hadn’t even noticed the restaurant was almost empty until Matt took off his glasses, toying with the earpiece of them.
“I like it better this way,” you noted deliberately and his fingers froze. “Uh-uh, no, leave them off, please. I really do like it better, if that’s okay with you.”
He sort-of looked at you shyly and you were welcomed by the warm of his brown irises, twinkling in the soft light of the candle.
“You sure?” he pried hesitantly and you nodded, hoping he could perceive that.
He resembled a lost but hopeful puppy and it was such a surreal look on his face – through the night, you had had an opportunity to know him a bit more, but this was… new. No matter what you had been discussing, there always had been confidence in him – more or less. You didn’t think he would be self-continuous about his eyes of all things, but it made sense. Your heart swelled.
“Yeah, Matt. I really am.”
Time flied and before you knew it, the waitress politely pointed out they were about to close the restaurant.
“Oh,” you let out intelligently, honestly taken aback. This time wary of being subtle, you checked the space – it was empty. Everyone was out. Oh.
“Of course. Bring me the check, please,” Matt asked, apparently unfazed. You could only wonder if he had been aware of their situation; given his abilities, he probably had. Huh. Guess he didn’t want to leave either – the thought warmed you heart.
He paid for you both, helping you with your coat again. Once you were outside, pleasantly cool air brushing your cheeks, he turned to you sheepishly.
“May I walk you home? Or do you prefer a cab?”
Your heels were killing you already; yet, the choice was clear, because you didn’t want the night to end.
“Walk?”
Your reward was his wide smile and silent request for your elbow. Damn the heels, this was worth it.
“Lead the way?” he asked as he folded his cane, his hand sliding under your arm.
You would be hesitant about the direction, but the Avengers tower was too much of a highlight to miss it. Still, you couldn’t help but tease him.
“Do you trust a woman with directions?”
He chuckled. “Well, I am blind, so I’m trusting anyone who can actually see where we’re going. Perhaps not any woman. I think we established a while ago that I trust you.”
Your heart skipped a beat at that, making Matt’s smile grow. Well, that wasn’t embarrassing at all, that he could read literally every reaction your body had. Not awkward at all.
“Thanks.”
You weren’t stupid enough to walk to the Tower. For all you knew, Tony had his eyes on everything within a half-mile radius at least and you didn’t want him to spy on you two. That man had no sense of privacy whatsoever.
“Well, I guess this is me,” you murmured, stopping in your tracks. Matt frowned and you cleared your throat. “Uhm… eyes and ears everywhere. I don’t want to…”
A flash of understanding appeared on his face and he laughed silently as he turned his whole body to you. He was close. Very close.
“That makes sense. Too bad it means we have to say goodbye now.”
“Technically, we don’t have to. Say it, that is,” you added at his confused expression. One corner of his lips rose higher, his free hand finding yours and running up your arm.
“Very true, Gerda.”
Your breath hitched as he used your nickname for the first time that night. His hands weren’t helping you to control your breathing either.
“We can always go with a goodnight.”
“Is a goodnight kiss too bold?” he whispered, leaning in just slightly, giving you a room to escape if you wanted to. You didn’t think you wanted to escape.
“Very bold…” His face fell, silent ‘oh’ escaping him. “But I’m okay with bold.”
“Mean woman,” he murmured, erasing the distance and meeting your lips.
Your heart positively stopped the moment it happened and it felt like eternity before it kicked back in.
His lips were warm against yours, gentle and hesitant at first. Your own hand deliberately shot up to his face as you realized a response would be appropriate, but dammit it had been a while and his mouth on yours felt so fucking good. Your fingers found his nape, pulling him just a little closer as heat coiled in your abdomen, welcoming the butterflies fluttering their wings in your stomach. You felt the grip on your elbow tightening and Matt took your lower lip between his, fondling with more boldness indeed.
You sighed in appreciation, your heart hammering in your ribcage that suddenly felt too small, even for your breathing. You retreated just slightly, needing some air, but aching at the thought of creating a distance between you and him. He inhaled deeply too, his hand on your jaw, his thumb caressing your cheek.
“Goodnight?” he tried out silently and you couldn’t help but chuckle, enjoying the tickle of his breath as he did the same.
“Fight me, but that didn’t feel like a goodnight kiss.” You shortly met his lips again, unable to resist – but aiming for only a peck that wouldn’t leave your fingertips tingling like the previous kiss. “Goodnight?”
“Goodnight indeed.”
He kissed the corner of your mouth before letting go of you and you pretended you didn’t feel cold all of sudden. At least his warm eyes were still watching your chin.
“Stay safe,” you whispered and Matt gave you one more gorgeous smile.
“I’ll try. Take care.”
You nodded and forced your body to spin on your heels to go, because if you wouldn’t do it now, you might as well end up going home with him or taking him to the Tower, which something you weren’t really ready for.
You started walking, snuggling into your coat, crossing your arms on your chest to keep yourself warmer. You spared one more glance at Matt, who was still standing where you had left him, raising his hand in tiny wave as you looked over your shoulder. Your cheeks burned as you got caught; then again, he hadn’t move from his position, watching you as well, so you had no reason to be truly embarrassed.
Or you thought so, until you realized the air actually was unusually chilly for September and to make it perfect, a snowflake fell on your nose. You looked around, realizing it started snowing.
Snowing. This wasn’t normal. Which meant… did you just…?
“Holy shit,” you muttered under your breath, unsure whether you should be horrified or not as you turned your palm up, catching few more snowflakes. You… you somehow did this. It was as terrifying as awesome.
In the end, you just giggled at what you had caused.
Let it snow.
────── ·❆· ──────
Natasha was standing in her room, staring out of the window as snowflakes slowly descended. None of them stuck, melting as soon as they collided with the surface, but there was no denying it really was snowing. And given the fact that the temperature needed to drop significantly for this to happen, there was no doubt whose doing was that – deliberate or not.
Your emotions were running high.
“Hey, Steve. What are you still doing awake?” she heard your astonished voice from the hallway and she bit her lip. This was definitely your excited voice; the date went well. The snow was a good sign.
“Couldn’t sleep.”
Natasha’s heart ached for her friend, simultaneously wondering if you could hear the subtle hint of pain in his voice. She suddenly felt guilty for helping you to get ready for the date – but it felt like the right thing to do.
“So you went to a gym? It’s after midnight. You’re making us all look like couch potatoes.”
Natasha could easily imagine that the soldier ‘casually’ shrugged.
“Felt like working out,” he explained easily. No shit. How many punching bags did he destroy this time?
“Is everything okay? I know it’s not the first time. Something troubling you? Talk to me, Steve,” you pleaded softly.
Natasha sighed. That would be your placing your hand on his forearm in comforting gesture, your eyes screaming ‘you can trust me’. You always did that, because it was the thing you two did and you two were so utterly hopeless it hurt.
“It’s nothing, Snowflake. Nothing you need to worry about. You look happy. I take it the date went well?”
His voice was strained and the spy had no doubt you could tell. Yet, you answered him, tiny chuckle bubbling in your throat. “Yeah. It did.”
“One more reason for you not to worry about me,” Steve offered kindly and Natasha just gritted her teeth. Rogers was such an ass. Noble, maybe, but bozhe, such an ass. “I’m happy for you, Snowflake.”
“Thank you. But we’re talking about you, soon. I need you to be happy too, Steve. You’re too important to me and too good not to be.”
Natasha agreed wholeheartedly, glancing at the flash drive on her nightstand. She had downloaded the conversation she had with Steve, him confessing his feelings for you, but now, it seemed worthless.
While she wished for you to be happy, she was hoping you could do that with the supersoldier who was head over heels for you. She had been sure you felt the same, but now she had doubts. You could easily fall in love with Daredevil, he was charming enough, and she had no right to interfere with your love-life.
“Okay. I promise I’ll tell you later.”
Natasha scoffed. Yeah, sure. On your deathbed, maybe.
“ ‘kay. Love you, Steve. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Snowflake.”
Natasha heard your footsteps trailing off and slowly went to open her door for a slit.
“Don’t say a word,” Steve warned her icily, a heart-breaking crack in his voice.
“I was gonna offer you a drink, an ‘I’m sorry’ and a hug.”
She heard him inhale and exhale shakily and she stepped out to find him resting his forehead against the nearest wall. His eyes were squeezed shut and she would swear it wasn’t sweat what gleamed on his cheeks. She pressed her lips together, hesitantly bringing her palm to his arm. His Adam’s apple bobbed.
“I’m really sorry, Steve,” she whispered tentatively, surprised when he bounced off the wall, looking her straight in the eye. His own were indeed glassy, but he wasn’t crying.
“You don’t have to be. She deserves the win, I’m happy for her.”
He said it with such conviction that if she hadn’t known him well enough, she wouldn’t notice how fragile the façade he had hastily built up was.
“Good. But you should know you don’t have to be, macho man. It’s okay to be angry, not just with yourself, but also with her and especially with him. You can be sad and you can be hurt. I know I’m not exactly the most open person when it comes to emotions, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel. And you can feel too.”
Steve escaped her gaze, but she could see his tiny nod. She took it as a victory and encouraged, she took his huge arm.
“Come on, Cap, let’s find out where Thor stocked the good booze.”
────── ·❆· ──────
Tags: @mermaidxatxheart, @murdermornings, @elisaa-shelby @ask-hellbent-tweek
────── ·❆· ──────
Thank you for reading! If you read for Matt x reader, this is it for ya, sorry ;) You can always check out Steve x reader ending or my other Matt Murdock fics :-*
#marvel#fanfiction#matt murdock reader#matt murdock imagine#daredevil x reader#daredevil imagine#mcu#avengers#avenger reader#matt murdock fanfiction#matt murdock#marvel fanfiction#love triangle#hands too cold but heart of gold#anika ann
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Hold me closer part 5
Frank Castle x Karen Page
Warning: agression
“Earth calls Karen!” Foggy breaks you out of dreamworld.
“Sorry, what?”
“He is okay!”
“I know...” you try to smile.
“It was just eight weeks and he already can walk leaning into just a walking stick!”
“I know he is alright!” You answer, but have no willing to tell him it is not what was on your mind.
“So this case was the last one for today, as I said!”
“Sorry, I was not a big help today!”
“It is okay Karen, we all had bad days!” Answers Matt. “You should go home now!”
“Thank you, really sorry, I try to get my Shit together for tomorrow!”
“We meet at nine!” Nelson gives your bag into your hand, and pushes you out the office.
“Bye!” You mutter more likely for yourself. You step out of the building, and you feel like someone is watching you, you look up but there is noone watching you from the office, as noone was in the last 3 days. It annoys you, as you don’t know you are just paranoid, or someone is watching.
As you walk trhough a darker alley you hear a wishper. “Karen Page” you turn but see noone. You try to walk faster, your hand in your bag on your gun. “You can’t hide from me!” Someone is defenetly after you. “You will pay for his crimes!” you see him now, and he is almost at your back.
“Who’s?” You yell. It is scary, still not the worst place you ever were.
“The punisher’s!” Fuck. “I know he comes home to you! I know you mean a lot to him!” He reaches for you but you just slip out of his fingers.
“You know nothing!” You yell at him. The end of the alley is near. You are running now, you see the train coming in the station so you run, just to jump on it before the doors are closed. You can’t see anyone that came after you. You hope you are right.
“Pack your stuff!” You don’t even say hi.
“Good afternoon for you too!” Franks eyebrows are in the air.
“I’m not in a funny mode, someone came after me!”
“Are you sure?” He looks way more serious now.
“I felt for days that someone is watching me the way home, but today he told me while chasing me, that I will pay for your crimes!” You sit down and hide your face on your hand.
“Motherfucker!”
“Here is the reason to leave!” You mumble packing your stuff.
“Are you sure?” He stops you cupping your face. “I can leave, but you don’t need to!”
“Frank did you hear me in the morning?”
“Yeah...”
“You want to leave me behind?” You ask tears in your eyes.
“Never!”
“Good! Than pack your stuff, we are leaving tonight!” While you are madly putting your most important stuff away, you start to call. “Be at Matt’s in an hour!”
“Something is wrong Karen? I’m already here!”
“Stay there, both of you, I will hurry!” You cut the line.
“You want to say goodbye?”
“I can’t go away without one...” you start sobbing.
————————————
“What’s wrong Karen?” Nelson looks at you, your comfy yoga pants, Franks sweatshirt what is huge for you, and your cried out eyes.
“I’m leaving... I don’t want to loose you guys, but shit someone is after me...”
“Because of Frank!” Ends Matt.
“Yes because of him!” Who is waiting in the car for you.
“And you go away with him?” Asks Foggy.
“Yes! I love him!”
“Karen you know I can hear the heartbeat!” Comes from Matt, and you almost choke.
“She knows you can hear her heartbeat!” He looks confused.
“He is not speaking about mine...” you answer slowly.
“You didn’t wanted to tell us?”
“I wasn’t sure...”
“To tell what?” Franklin looks between the two of you. “Who’s heartbeat he is talking about then?”
“You run away with him now, and what if he is not happy about it?” Classic Matt.
“You forget he was a father before! But he knows about it, I told him when I did the test this morning.”
“Oooh... wait... really?” Nelson sees the light.
“Yeah, I guess I waited way longer than needed to test if Matt hears a heartbeat...” you put your hand on your stomach with tears in your eyes. A heartbeat, so it is true.
“God, I never imagined you as a mother!”
He looks at you shocked.
“I always knew you would make a great mother!” Yet this is Classic Matt too.
“I wish I could stay... I mean my carrier at Nelson, Murdock and Page would be off for a while but now it is over.” You start to cry.
“Are you sure about this? We can protect you!” He steps closer.
“I know, and if it is not Frank I would stay, but nothing can change how I feel about him, and now...”
“Now you think he can change...” laughs bitter sweet Matt.
“No I don’t think he can change, but I know he was a great father, and he was just about to leave the army before his family was gunned down infront of his face. God! I don’t care if he can’t be a tipical husband, I don’t care if he gets himself into something again, even I know his body will never be capable of things he did before, but fuck I don’t care, I want to be a family with him, with this child, we both are demaged, and killed people, but still I think this could be a good thing!”
“Karen!”
“No Nelson, I want to say this for the last time, I won’t leave his side, not because Matt just told me I was right, not because this morning I find out I’m carrying his child under my heart, but because I love him, I believe in us, and I know we can live through every fucking Shit that will happen to us!”
“Actually I just wanted to tell you...”
“That I’m behind you...” you hear Frank’s deep voice from behind.
“Since...” you wishper looking at him.
“Long enough to say that I can’t promise you I won’t make mistakes, but I can promise you I will try my best to not make the mistakes I made last time. I lost a wife, and two kids, and damn me if I do this again. You... you two mean everything to me in this world, and if I need to work 9-5 to keep you safe I will! I’m not promising I won’t get into trouble, that’s not who I am, but I promise you I won’t go for it, if that is enough for you!”
“Is it enough for you Karen?” Ask Matt.
“You know my answer!” You say. “I hope one day our path crosses again, somehow, but I know deep in my heart this is what I need to do!”
“We will miss you Karen!” Foggy hugs you, and Matt does too. You cry out.
“Guys, don’t make me cry you know you are like brothers to me, right?” You hug them tighter. “Please keep yourself alive!” You mumble as you get out of the hug. “Have a perfect life... both of you!” You kiss them on the cheek and walk to Frank.
You about to walk out, holding his hand. “Page!”
“Yes Murdock?”
“Keep youself and your family safe!”
“I will!”
“Until next time...”
“Until next time!” You walk out tears still in your eyes.
————————
“Ellison!”
“Karen! I haven’t seen you in a while!” He looks at you at first, but stars at Frank who is following you in silence. “What is he doing here?”
“We are leaving...” you already start to sob.
“We?”
“Yes, we!” You look at Frank for a moment. “We have been living together for months, but now it is not important...”
“You don’t need my permission to go away...”
“No I don’t. But if I go for God I want to say goodbye!” You look at him, you know he did think you mean like that.
“You leave hells kitchen behind?” He steps closer.
“Yeah, I need to, even it is hard to leave all of you behind...” a tear already escaped your eye.
“You know I won’t question your choice, I know you wouldn’t go if it is not needed, but be carefull!” He hugs you. “And please give me something to know you are okay!”
“I will, promise!” You hug him thight and don’t want to let him go. “Stay safe!”
You walk away again holding Frank’s hand. When you sit in the car, he looks at your cried out face. “Where do you want to head?”
“Venice!” You answer, and laugh as you see his face. “You really thought she will not contect me to ask about you?”
“She is still there?”
“Yes she is!”
To be continued...
My sweet perm: @simply-sams-things
Story tags: @kastlenetwork @keyworld1101
If you wanna be tagged or removed just message me.
#frank castle#frank castle x karen#frank castle fic#frank castle fanfiction#frank castle fanfic#the punisher fanfiction#the punisher
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Perfect
fandom: Daredevil
pairing: Matt Murdock x trans Reader
summary: requested by anon: Could I request a Matt x trans male reader helping his boyfriend feel less dysphoric?
warnings: none
word count: 625
a/n: oh dear, I hope I did okay with this. first time writing a trans reader, so please give me feedback! I don’t want to offend anyone or get anything wrong :) happy trans day of visibility!
also I’m getting so many Matt x reader requests! I’m living for all this love for my favorite boy 😭
God, looking in the mirror was weird. That body – your body – exposed, on display. Swells and curves that didn’t belong.
No, not just weird. Wrong.
Normally, you wouldn’t look in the mirror before showering. But you’d caught a glance today as you undressed and stopped in your tracks.
You can feel your heart hammering in your chest as you stare at the person standing in front of you. Usually your clothes and binder give you some security, but now… stripped down, that safety net is gone. And that person in the mirror isn’t you.
It feels like your heart is going to bust out of your ribcage. You have to sit down. Now. You quickly sit, thankful for Matt’s aversion to coarse textures as the soft, plush bath rug comes in contact with your skin. The mirror – and the person standing in it – slide out of your line of sight. You shake your head slightly, fixing your eyes on the water beading up on the shower door. The sound of droplets hitting the glass is a welcome distraction.
The front door opens and closes. Footsteps making their way through the main room of the apartment, meandering around the space.
“Matt,” you call out, your own voice sounding foreign to your ears.
The footsteps stop outside the bathroom door. A light knock. “Y/N? Are you alright?” Matt’s voice is concerned, soft.
You don’t answer. The bathroom door opens, but you have your back to it and don’t see your boyfriend enter. Matt’s hand lands gently on your shoulder. “What’s wrong? Your heart’s going a mile a minute.”
You turn your head to look at him and find him crouched behind you. His glasses are off, his face understanding but worried. “It’s not right. This,” you gesture to yourself, sweeping your hand in a downward motion, “isn’t right.”
Matt nods, sensing the motion, and settles cross-legged behind you. “Dysphoria?” he asks gently.
“Yeah,” your voice breaks and a bit of frustration flares up inside you. Even your voice isn’t right.
Matt slides his arms around you in a light hug. “You’re perfect,” he murmurs, pressing a light kiss to the back of your neck.
You turn around to face him and his hands fall to your waist. “Doesn’t feel that way,” you respond quietly, looking down at your fidgeting hands.
Matt moves to cup your face, doing his best to meet your eyes. “I know. But believe me when I say this. You are so handsome, so perfect, and I could not ask for anything else.”
You sniff and wipe away a tear that you didn’t notice before. “You can’t even see me, Matt.”
“I don’t need to see you to know that you are absolutely stunning. Not to mention all the stuff inside, too.” He taps your chest with his finger, just over your rapidly beating heart. A small but encouraging smile graces his lips. “I know that you are kind-hearted and courageous and smart and so, so strong. You’ve done so many amazing things. And you’ve done those things because you are you. Not anybody else. You.”
You manage a slight smile in return. “Thank you, Matt,” you say, kissing his lips lightly.
“I love you Y/N,” he says as you draw away. “So, so much.”
“I love you, too, Matty.”
Matt stands slowly, bringing you up with him. He makes sure you’re facing away from the mirror and pulls you in for a tight hug. “Now, you’re running my water bill through the roof,” he jokes, still holding you close. “How about we shower and then watch a movie?”
You nod, your head buried in his chest. “Perfect,” you murmur.
“Just like you,” he replies, kissing the top of your head. “So, so perfect.”
#imagine#imagines#one shot#oneshots#oneshot#x reader#reader#marvel#daredevil#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#daredevil x reader#fanfiction#reading#writing#fiction#trans reader#transgender day of visibility#trans day of visibility
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Vigilante Date Night - Matt Murdock - 3
Prompt: Ooh, heavy makeout, but the Reader and Matt have just finished vigilante things and they’re both still in their suits? You choice as to whether this is a common thing to see in Hell’s Kitchen or not. I’d like to see people being used to it, but the idea of everyone finding out the two of them are dating because they were publicly making out is /hilarious./ Jess would give them so much shit. (Actually, can I just request both outcomes? I know it’d be two prompts at once.)
Prompter: @occasionallygiveadamn
Adding this to my Vigilante Date Night series. Here’s part two in case you guys want to fresh your memory?
Tags are at the bottom. Let me know if you would like to be added to one of my tag lists!
Enjoy!
*****
The sound of the glass shattering drew your attention to the far side of the warehouse where Matt was taking on three guys at once. You had four of your own to deal with and you knew he was more than capable, but you still sent out a curl of your telekinesis to trip one of his guys before you had to dodge a pipe that was swung out towards your head.
It had become apparent that the criminal element in New York City knew that you were the more dangerous out of the two of you. Well, maybe not more dangerous, but the bigger threat. And since they all knew that now, you were usually the target of most of their furor.
Gun.
You shot a hand out, trusting yourself and Matt’s word. Your telekinesis yanked the weapon from a man’s hand and sent it flying into the dark part of the warehouse. Then you swung out and knocked him down with your power.
It was the hardest you’d had to fight in a long time. Your telekinesis was worn down from helping Daredevil and some firemen save a few people from a burning building. Then you’d come across the gun runners with girls locked in the basement.
The girls were safe. Now you just needed to get the gun runners.
A punch came out, striking against your temple. Your mask wasn’t much protection so you winced as you stumbled a bit, throwing out your arm and pushing the assailant back a foot. More exhaustion leaked through you and a second punch came through.
I’m coming.
You looked over to where Matt was about to dispatch his last gun runner. A sudden surge of readiness went through you at realizing that you could do this, you had to. With as much power as you could gather, you sent out a hard wave of telekinesis and knocked down all four of your gun runners.
It gave you and Matt the chance to go around and knock them each out personally. You took a little pleasure in breaking the nose of the guy who had made your ears ring.
“Hey, you okay?”
You wobbled a bit and nodded, body slumping to your knees. Matt was right there, his gloved hands moving over your body as he checked you for injuries. He paused at your head, most likely reading the two blows you’d sustained.
“I’m fine, just drained,” you said as you raised a shaking hand to cover his wrist. “We should call the cops. Make sure these guys get grabbed.”
Matt tugged your mask up to kiss you, a simple touch that he did when the two of you had just survived an encounter with thugs. Except this wasn’t just any encounter; this one could have gone very wrong. You found yourself holding on to his neck, pressing your body along his as best as you could. You flicked your tongue against his, your gloved fingers pressing into the unyielding leather and kevlar of his suit.
His hands wrapped around your body, tugging you into him. The kiss had started soft and sweet but had turned desperate. You knew that he would be just as worried about losing you as you were about losing him. Between that and just how happy you were to be done fighting, you couldn’t hold back your reaction.
You should have tried harder.
You knew why you didn’t hear them; your telepathy wasn’t as drained as your telekinesis, but it was a near thing with how exhausted you were. But Matt? He should have been able to hear them coming.
The warehouse doors opened to reveal what looked to be half of the police force. None of them seemed to know what to do as they faced down over half a dozen gun runners that were unconscious and two local vigilantes who were getting hot and heavy in the middle of the floor.
He pulled you up into a standing position, moving his body in front of yours. You knew that he would take them all on to protect you but you didn’t want that.
You tugged your mask down to cover your mouth. The officers seemed more interested in the gun runners so you tugged on Matt’s wrist.
“We need to leave,” you said quietly, your head starting to throb. “I’m not gonna be able to stand much longer.”
That put him in gear. Matt nodded to one of the officers you both dealt with more frequently before he wrapped his arm around your waist and started to guide you back out of the warehouse the way you came.
“Do you think they’ll tell anyone?”
You looked up at Matt, noticing that he didn’t look displeased by the notion. You reached out and did a soft brush of the minds nearby and found one that was glowing like a beacon.
“Oh, someone got a picture of it,” you said in shock, shuddering a bit as you did. “Yeah, that’s going on the internet.”
Matt’s soft laughter as he supported your weight was reply enough.
------
“Did you have to tongue Murdock at the scene of a crime?” Jess threw down the magazine she’d picked up on her way to your place. “This is gross. You two are everywhere. I think I saw a billboard.”
You looked at the picture and pushed the magazine away from you. You’d seen it plenty of times since that night.
“Could I sue for royalties without revealing my identity?”
Jess scoffed as she slumped into the chair near you, kicking her feet onto the coffee table. She looked at the magazine and then back to where you were sewing a tear in your suit.
“Really, where are you at with all this? You okay with you and Daredevil being the prom king and queen?”
You smiled as you tied off the thread. She was being snarky, as always, but you knew that she meant it.
“I don’t care really. Matt and I talked about it and we usually fight together anyways. My biggest problem is the name that they gave me.”
Jess snorted as she grabbed the magazine again and looked at the headline.
Daredevil and his Lady of the Night.
“Think they knew they were calling you a prostitute?”
You snuggled into the chair a bit as you looked over the handiwork. There were a few more cuts that could be sewn, but you’d rather just spend time with Jess right then.
“Matt got to pick his own name; maybe it’s time I pick mine.”
Jess threw the magazine down with a smirk.
“Oh I can think of a few that you’ll hate slightly less than Lady of the Night.”
------
Daredevil struck out with his baton, cracking it against the jaw of the thief. You yanked the bag of money and jewels from the other thief with your telekinesis, tossing it out of reach. Then you whirled around and delivered a quick kick to his jaw.
The cop that had been chasing the two of them stopped and watched you both fight. He had his hand on his gun, but didn’t draw it. While Daredevil bent down to cuff the two of them, you lifted the bag with your power and passed it over to the cop who took it with wide eyes.
“Thank you,” he said almost cautiously, watching the two vigilantes move around just a few feet away from him. “You two do a lot for the city. Daredevil has been a huge help with taking down Fisk and then you,” he said with a look in your direction, “well you’re more terrifying in person than in pictures or videos.”
You smirked, glad that it was covered by your new mask. You stood up from where you had been checking the thief for any other weapons before you turned to face the officer completely. It gave him a clear look on the mask and how it was made up of red and black, a red mesh strip over where your eyes were but the rest being smooth. It gave no indication of your facial features.
“We’re just here to help,” Daredevil said as he moved to your side, his hand on your arm. “More sirens. We need to go.”
You nodded and turned to walk away. You both barely got a few steps away before the cop called out again.
“Is it going to be a date night for Daredevil and the Lady of the Night?”
Matt smirked as he continued into the dark of the alley, but you pushed your mind out to brush the officer’s.
Call me Queen of Hearts.
X
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Every Breath You Take Chapter 7: Reach Out, I’ll Be There
Hiiii guys! Sorry for the long ass wait! School was kicking my ass, but I’m on summer break for a month now so YAY! And I’m back with a nice long chapter for you and man are you guys in for a ride! Btw thank you @hufflebucky for the beautiful moodboard! I love it so much! And thank you @probably-a-velociraptor for the certain line you mentioned in your ask that I just had to put in here! You know which one I’m talking about ;) Without further delay....enjoy!
Masterlist
Chapter 7: Reach Out, I’ll Be There
The men of Nelson & Murdock were both on missions today. While Matt was following Iris to make sure she was safe, Foggy took that opportunity to stop by Sweet Heaven to see a certain stunning brunette he might or might not have already told his mom about.
Foggy Nelson has done his fair share of chasing after women he was attracted to throughout his life, though admittedly not all of those times were successful since beautiful women seemed to flock towards Matt instead. But the moment he laid eyes on Lucy Addams, all those memories of women he chased in the past had erased from his mind. He only had eyes for Lucy, and it appeared the feeling was mutual.
He couldn’t even begin to explain this feeling he had in his heart that was stronger than anything he had ever felt before. Why so sudden for someone he just met? Love at first sight couldn’t possibly exist, right? And with that, Foggy’s heart argued, Why the hell not? Would that really be so wrong?
Whether or not it was love or just attraction, Foggy was determined to get to know the dark haired goddess who runs the adorable bakery that’s quickly becoming his favorite spot.
Which has lead to the present moment where Foggy was currently standing outside of the bakery, seeing the woman of his dreams handing out cupcakes to a couple of excited little kids while their parents paid. Seeing her interact with the kids with a genuine glowing smile on her face made the butterflies in Foggy’s stomach flutter like crazy.
As if feeling his eyes on her, Lucy’s eyes shifted until they met his through the window. Her grey eyes brightened to greyish blue as she brightly grinned at him and waved for him to come in. Foggy couldn’t contain the grin on his face that shined brighter than the sun as his cheeks flushed into a rosy pink. Foggy quickly pulled out his phone to leave Matt a message telling him to meet him at the bakery to talk about a potential client instead of the office. He smoothed back his hair and straightened his tie before entering the bakery to see about a girl.
2 Hours Later
The bakery was empty aside from Foggy and Lucy currently occupying one of the small tables. There laid two half empty porcelain mugs of coffee and hot chocolate as well as an array of different pastries and cakes for Foggy to “sample”, only for him to split between them, always giving Lucy the bigger half.
But those desserts were ignored as the two occupants only had their attention focused on each other, the song “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” by Frankie Valli playing appropriately in the background.
“What’s your favorite show?” Lucy asked with eager curiosity as she leaned closer to him with a dreamy gaze in her eyes.
Without missing a beat, Foggy replied “I Love Lucy.” It took him a second to snap out of his daze to realize how that might sound. “I mean, not because it’s your name,” he cleared his throat, his face flushing tomato red. “It’s just a great show! My mom had me watch it with her growing up, you’d love her by the way, I already told her about you- I mean, it’s a funny show!” Foggy was trying so hard to save face, he didn’t realize he was babbling.
The melodic sound of Lucy’s giggles stopped him from babbling any further. Foggy felt incredibly embarrassed by his word vomit, but all Lucy did was smile.
“You’re really cute when you get all flustered.” She told him, causing him to blush even harder. “And I love that show. She’s hilarious! And by the way…” She trailed off as she leaned toward him even closer. “I would love to meet your mother, since she’s raised such a fine young man.” She gave a flirtatious wink.
I love you baby
And if it's quite alright
I need you baby
To warm the lonely nights
I love you baby
Trust in me when I say
Oh pretty baby
Don't bring me down I pray
Oh pretty baby
Now that I've found you stay
And let me love you, baby
Let me love you
Foggy’s heart raced as the song declared everything he was already dying to say. He took a big gulp of his warm coffee before quickly asking her, “So what’s your favorite show?”
“The Addams Family.” Lucy replied with a smile.
“Really?” Foggy asked, his eyebrows raised in surprise.
She gingerly nodded. “Yep! I’ve always loved the dark, creepy and kooky stuff. And since my last name also happens to be Addams, I always imagined that I was related to them.” Lucy’s cheeks turned into a light rosy pink. “I love The Munsters too, but Addams Family has always had a special place in my heart.” Lucy’s eyes locked with Foggy as she reached for his hand before she continued, “Plus, I’ve always dreamed of having a love like Gomez and Morticia.”
Oh god, me too. Please let me be your Gomez! Foggy thought.
Before he could respond, however, the bell rang as the door opened. Foggy turned to see who rudely interrupted his time with Lucy, only to see Matt enter the bakery.
“Matt, so nice of you to join us.” Foggy greeted, his mood dampening slightly.
“Don’t sound too excited to see me, Foggy.” Matt sarcastically replied as he took the seat Lucy led him to at their table.
Foggy could see how visibly tense his friend was as he took a good look at him. His body was straight and tiff from tension, his fists tightening then loosening up. Foggy looked closer at Matt’s fists, noticing the knuckles were red with angry scrapes from punching something...or someone.
“Holy shit, Matt! Did you get in a fight?” Foggy exclaimed in concern. Lucy saw Matt’s fists and rushed to the back room.
“No, I didn’t get in a fight.” Matt replied through clenched teeth. “I just needed to blow off some steam, and the punching bag was the best option.”
“Well I’m glad it’s just a punching bag and not a person.” Lucy said as she returned to the table with a first aid kit. “It’s a little too early in the day for you to be doing your Daredevil thing.”
Matt’s stomach dropped at Lucy’s words. His fists clenched even tighter as he addressed his best friend. “Foggy?”
“What?” Foggy shrugged defensively. “I can’t start a relationship based on lies! Besides, she’s cool. We can trust her.”
“What the fuck, Foggy?!” Matt snapped, thankful that the bakery was still empty. “You told a dangerous secret to some woman you just met?!” Lucy’s grip tightened on Matt’s hand as she continued treating it. “No offense, Lucy.” He muttered apologetically.
Foggy, on the other hand, took great offense to Matt. “First of all, watch your language in front of this beautiful lady,” He angrily pointed out. “Second, we may have ‘just met’, but I’ve already named our future children! And I know for a fact that Foggy Jr. and Lucy Jr. would appreciate total honesty in this family!” He finished with a pound of his fist atop the table.
The bakery went silent. Matt’s lips twitched while he tried to keep his angered expression. Unfortunately for him, it wasn’t meant to last as he let out and amused snort.
Lucy didn’t bother hiding her giggles, she found the blonde teddy bear so adorable and endearing.
Foggy looked confused as to what was so funny. “What?”
Matt couldn’t hold it in anymore, he let out a belly laugh, “Foggy, you make it really hard to stay mad at you.”
Foggy still looked clueless until Lucy leaned her head on his shoulder affectionately, still giggling, “Foggy, you are too precious for words, but let’s hold off on baby names until we’ve had our first date at least.” She finishes with a kiss on his cheek, causing him to blush into a bright tomato.
Before Foggy could think of how to respond, the bell chimed as a few customers entered the bakery. Lucy quickly rose from her seat to assist the customers, her fingers softly grazed through Foggy’s blonde hair as she passed by.
Matt smiled, knowing his best friend kept his “heart eyes” (as Iris called them) on the enchanting baker that’s captured his heart.
“You must really like her a lot if you trust her with this kind of information.” Matt spoke quietly, sounding more calm and understanding.
Foggy’s eyes turned downcast in guilt before facing Matt again. “I’m really sorry, Matt. You know I wouldn’t announce it to the world, or tell just anyone.”
He paused to gaze at Lucy, who was chatting with a middle aged couple while showing them her delicious creations. He felt his heart practically dancing when her eyes shifted towards him and she gave a blushing radiant smile.
“I’m in love with her.” Foggy continued softly, not realizing he voiced his feelings out loud; his eyes still on Lucy. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, man. I know it’s crazy and it’s sudden, I mean we’d only met yesterday! But the moment I saw her, it just hit me like I got punched with lightning or something. I know this feeling I have is real. I mean, sometimes you just know as soon as it hits you, you know?”
“Yeah.” Matt softly replied in complete understanding. “I know exactly how you feel.”
Foggy’s eyes widened as he snapped out of his love daze. “Oh shit, how is Iris? Is she okay?!” Foggy didn’t notice his voice had raised in alarm, catching the attention of the two remaining customers in the bakery.
“I would also like to know how Iris is doing, Matt.” Lucy chimed in as she walked towards the middle aged couple to deliver their treats.
Matt hesitated, “It’s...a little personal. Actually it’s extremely personal...and..disturbing.” He finished with a strained angry grimace.
Foggy’s eyes narrowed in concern as he leaned towards his friend. “What’s wrong? She is in trouble, isn’t she?” He asked, already knowing the answer.
Lucy rushed to their table and yanked back the chair next to Foggy to take a seat. “What’s going on with my best friend, Matt?” She asked, sounding more serious and intimidating than either of the two men have heard yet.
Matt, while touched by their concern, was still hesitant. “I don’t know if I should really say. It’s bad enough that I know when she hasn’t actually told me herself. It’s..” Matt felt his throat tighten and his eyes dampen at how painful it was to hear everything Iris had said. “It’s horrible.”
Foggy and Lucy stiffened at Matt’s words, trying to imagine what it was that Matt knew.
“Matt, we care about Iris, too.” Lucy replied.
Foggy fervently agreed. “Seriously, man. I’ve only known Iris for a day and a half, but if anything happened to her, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself!”
Foggy didn’t realize how loud his voice carried until he heard how silent the bakery got. The middle aged couple clearly heard Foggy’s passionate statement, because without a second thought, they jumped out of their seats and bolted out the door.
Matt, Foggy and Lucy were alone once more.
Foggy bashfully asked, “Do you think they heard me?”
Matt’s eyebrows raised in perplexity while Lucy let out a soft chuckle.
“Yeah, sweetie. I think they did.” She said with a pat on his head.
Foggy shrugged, “Well, I said what I said. But that’s not important right now.” He leaned towards Matt once more. “Please tell us. We want to help Iris, too.”
Matt sat quietly, contemplating his decision before faintly replying, “Okay.”
Iris
Claire’s impromptu checkup was relatively quick and painless. I cringed at her sympathetic gaze as she examined all the bruises and scars on my body, I felt embarrassed that she saw the extent of what he had done to me. She was considerate enough to not dwell on it, for now anyway. She did, however, diagnose the bruised ribs I didn’t realize I had. That explains why that hideous bruise on my torso hasn’t healed yet. Unfortunately, nothing can be done about that, except to take it easy and let it heal naturally, which will apparently take six weeks at the most.
After the exam was over, Claire gave me a prescription for some pain relief and antibiotics, as well as demanding I get some sleep.
After promising Claire I would rest on the condition that she stopped by the bakery for any treat on the house, I hugged her goodbye and exited the hospital.
I still wasn’t ready to go home yet. Not only out of fear of the lingering nightmares, but also out of fear of facing Matt. Despite Claire’s reassuring words, I still felt doubtful about whether or not he’ll want anything to do with me. I still can’t get over the crushed look on his face when I walked away from him. But maybe Claire’s right. I should just swallow my pride and talk to him. I owe him that much.
I snapped out of my inner thoughts and paused in my aimless wandering when I heard music in the air. I turned to the right of me, in the direction the music came from, and saw the tall building with the red neon sign in the shape of a guitar that read Guitar Center.
My fingers twitched with an aching need that I’ve repressed for far too long, my feet made the decision for me and led me inside the music store.
A wave of euphoria flowed through me as I took in the view of various instruments as far as the eye can see. The sound of live instruments playing sounding more and more prominent.
I walked further into the store towards the music until I found a small group of three guys and a young woman just lounging around. They all had a unique style, mix of rock & roll edge with a wild and colorful bohemian flair. The choices of instruments were oddly mismatched. The woman, who had a rockabilly style black and pink polka dot wiggle dress, was on her feet playing an upright bass, one guy was playing the violin, the second was playing an acoustic guitar, and the third guy sat on the floor playing a tambourine with drum sticks like it was a mini drum set. This was such an odd and fascinating mix of musicians, I couldn’t help but be drawn to them.
My eyes drifted past them and landed on a beautiful red upright piano. My fingers twitched with the urge to play. Should I? It’s been so long since I’ve touched a piano, I was afraid that I would be so rusty that I really would sound as mediocre as he always said I did.
Well He was an asshole who didn’t want you to enjoy anything that didn’t involve him. Play the damn piano. It’s been too long since we’ve done anything we were passionate about. We deserve this. You deserve this!
My feet obeyed my thoughts quicker than I did as I now found myself seated in front of the piano. I barely noticed the quirky musicians go quiet next to me, all I could really hear was my heartbeat thumping in my ears. My hands trembled as I delicately caressed the keys, saying hello to an old friend.
Without any more hesitation, my muscle memory kicked in as I played the beginning notes of the first song my mom taught me. I started slowly at first, then my fingers sped up as the song began to build up. I could faintly hear the jingles of the tambourine, and it was quickly followed by the instruments of the musicians next to me. One of the musicians started singing, the lyrics confirming that they were playing my song alongside me.
She comes in colors everywhere
She combs her hair
She's like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors
I looked over my shoulder towards the quirky group. The man with the guitar, who had his long hair tied back and wore a red Hawaiian shirt with black jean, met my eyes and nodded with a smile, signaling me to continue playing.
My heart was dancing as I played on, my confidence growing more and more. I didn’t even bother holding back the beaming smile from my face, as I played the music box-sounding notes on the keys. My eyes began to mist from the pure joy of doing something I thought I’d never be allowed to do again. I continued playing, with an energy and passion that have waited years to be reawakened.
Have you seen her dressed in blue?
See the sky in front of you
And her face is like a sail
Speck of white so fair and pale
Have you seen a lady fairer?
She comes in colors everywhere
She combs her hair
She's like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors
Oh how I wish Mom was here with me, she would’ve loved to hear me play her favorite song again.
Have you seen her all in gold?
Like a queen in days of old
She shoots colors all around
Like a sunset going down
Have you seen a lady fairer?
She comes in colors everywhere
She combs her hair
She's like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors
I wish Matt was here too. Would he like hearing me play? Would he say he loved it? Would he ask me to play more? Would he want to sit beside me as I played? Oh how I wished I knew for sure.
She's like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors
The room went quiet as the final notes faded in the air. The quiet didn’t last long, though, as a few patrons of the store had started applauding; I didn’t even realize we had actually drawn an audience. My face heated up, my cheeks flushed bright red amongst my pale skin. It’s been so long since I’ve played in front of everyone, I forgot how amazing it felt to get a positive response.
The musicians that accompanied me nodded with approval at me, and that simple gesture warmed my heart with a sense of belonging.
The tambourine man, who wore heavy eyeliner and a wildly colorful abstract shirt with leather pants, stood up to sit next to me on the bench and eagerly asked, “Play us another song, darling?”
I hesitated for a second, not used to getting such a request. “I’m not sure what you would like to hear.” I replied meekly.
“Anything you want.” The violinist replied. He wore black and white striped pants with a fitted pink and blue paisley buttoned shirt topped with a black bow tie and a black vest. “Just start playing and we’ll follow along.”
My brows furrowed in concern, “What if you don’t know the song?”
“We don’t need to,” The guitarist spoke up. “We just let the music guide us through.”
The pinup bassist sweetly chimed in, “That’s how we always play, so don’t even worry about that, dollface. Play us something.”
I took a second to think over what other songs I knew before I started playing with my musical acquaintances for the next couple of hours.
After we were done playing together in the music store, my new friends dragged me along with them to an indie record store that also had a small cafe inside.
I easily lost track of time, I was too caught up in my new friends; the sun had already set by the time we had all parted ways. I left the record store with a bag full of new CDs, a chocolate chip muffin for the walk home, four new phone numbers added on my phone, and a smile of contentment on my face.
Claire was right. I wasn’t alone in this anymore. I don’t have to be.
My thoughts drifted back to Matt. The thought of telling him the truth terrified me still. I want so badly to let him in, but I can’t help but let that shred of doubt nudge it’s way into my mind.
Can he accept me completely? Will he judge me for what I’ve done? Will he hate me for lying? Or will he still want to help me?
I was too lost in my thoughts, I wasn’t alert enough to notice I was being watched, and also being followed.
I felt a hand grab my arm in a painful grip as I was yanked into a dark alley, a second hand covered my mouth before I had a chance to scream for help.
Oh god. He found me! How the hell did he find me?! He’s gonna kill me before I can even tell Matt how sorry I am. I didn’t even get to see Mom. I wish I had actually spoken to her-
My thoughts were cut off when an unfamiliar voice growled from my captor. “Give me your money now, and you won’t get hurt.”
Oh thank god, it’s only a mugger! My body sagged in relief.
The man then held a knife against my throat, causing me to stiffen up again. Oh shit, it’s a mugger!
I started to panic as I struggled to get out of his grasp, biting hard into his hand in the process.
The mugger growled in anger as he moved his now free hand into my hair, yanking it to the point where I feared it would be pulled out of my scalp.
“You fuckin bitch!” He sneered as he shoved my face against the wall.
I was hyperventilating at this point, unable to hold back the tears that flowed down my face. “Please let me go! I don’t have any money!” I pleaded desperately.
The mugger then pressed himself against my back, pressing his groin into my back.
“Then I’m just gonna have to get something else from you, huh?” He replied as he licked my ear, my body shivered in fear and disgust.
Then suddenly the pressure from his body was lifted abruptly as he was pulled off me and thrown against the wall.
I quickly turned around and was staring in stunned silence as I saw my mugger getting his ass handed to him by a mysterious man dressed in head to toe black. The man in black moved with speed and grace as he punched and kicked the mugger around like a ninja. The mugger tried to get some hits in, but he never stood a chance. The man in black hurled him against the wall, landing a foot away from me.
I shrieked in surprise as the mugger grabbed my ankle. I kicked and stomped repeatedly on his wrist, but he wouldn’t budge. The man in black rushed to my aid and pulled the mugger away from me. He let out a growl of anger as he threw him against the opposite wall.
“Keep your hands off of her!” The man in black threatened, his voice low and deep with rage, sending thrilling shivers down my spine.
He knocked the mugger out with one last anger-fueled punch, causing said mugger to collapse like a jenga tower. He squatted down towards the mugger and proceeded to restrain his hands and feet, causing the mugger to start twitching back into consciousness, prompting the man in black to deliver one more knockout punch to the face.
My breathing slowed down as he stood up and turned to face me. My heart started to beat faster as he started walking tentatively towards me. I took in his full appearance before me. He stood almost a foot taller than me, his fitted black outfit did nothing to hide his muscular build that my eyes struggled to stray from. The top half of his face was covered by the thick black fabric that tied around his head, leaving the bottom half visible; which of course drew my attention to those perfect full lips of his.
Perfect full lips that started speaking.
“Are you okay?” His deep voice was gentle with concern.
I shakily nodded, taking a deep breath as I replied. “I am, thanks to you.”
He tilted his head as his hand reached toward the side of my face that had been shoved against the wall. Even though his hand was gloved in thick material, my cheek came alive with a spark of electricity at his gentle touch.
“Are you hurt?” He asked with genuine concern.
My heart skipped a beat as his kindness reminded me of a certain neighbor, causing my eyes to water. “No, I’m fine.” I replied.
His head tilted once more as he asked with uncertainty. “Are you sure? He made you hit that wall pretty hard.” His thumb gave gentle feather light caresses across my newly bruised cheek.
I gave a shrug and replied tensely, “I’ve had worse.”
His whole body stiffened at my answer, he was close enough for me to hear him grind his teeth. I could just barely hear him mutter angrily under his breath, “I know.”
My brows wrinkled in confusion at what he could have meant by that. Before I could question him, though, he slowly began to step away from me, his lingering fingers grazing my cheek until he dropped his hand completely.
“You should go home.” He declared when he stood an extra couple feet away from me. “And be careful. The city’s dangerous at this time of night.”
“Okay.” I readily agreed. He started to turn around to walk away, prompting me to call out, “Hey!”
He abruptly stopped in his tracks, tilting his head once more to patiently listen.
“Thank you. You saved my life.” I finished, my voice heavy with gratitude.
I could just barely see the side of his mouth rise into a small smile as he replied, “You’re welcome. Please be safe.”
And with that, he disappeared into the shadows. I didn’t waste another second to bolt out of the alley and rush home.
I finally made it back to the familiar apartment building and didn’t stop running until I made it safely inside the elevator. Now that I had stopped and taken a breath, I began to feel the lead weight my legs had become; along with the exhaustion from lack of sleep and the series of events from this long day hitting me all at once. I definitely needed to go to sleep.
I got off the elevator on my floor and tiredly stumbled to my door. Before I unlocked it, I turned my attention towards Matt’s apartment. My run in with the mugger gave me a serious wake up call. I can’t keep wasting time being miserable and alone like this. I need to talk to Matt and tell him the truth, or forever wish I did. But not tonight. Not when I already felt dead on my feet. Tomorrow. I’ll tell him first thing tomorrow.
With my decision set in my mind, I entered my apartment and locked the door before I stumbled to my bed and finally succumbed to sleep.
I woke up the next morning feeling far more rested than the day before. I slept so heavily, I couldn’t even remember if I dreamed, much to my relief. I got up to brush my teeth and get dressed for the day, but not before texting Lucy to let her know I needed an extra day off, which she happily replied was no problem at all.
I could feel my stomach twist and tangle in anxiety at how this conversation with Matt can possibly turn out; I was ready to throw up. I was determined, but still terrified to tell him everything. I hate how scared I am about this. Matt has been nothing but sweet to me, I should feel comfortable enough to talk to him. But with the way I’ve acted towards him, and the weight of my secret, will he even want anything to do with me again?
My thoughts were interrupted by music playing muffled through the wall connecting my apartment to Matt’s. It was the beginning notes to The Four Tops’ “Reach Out I’ll Be There”, as if he knew what was going through my mind
Now if you feel that you can't go on (can't go on)
Because all of your hope is gone (all your hope is gone)
And your life is filled with much confusion (much confusion)
Until happiness is just an illusion (happiness is just an illusion)
And your world around is crumbling down, darlin'
(Reach out) Come on girl reach on out for me
(Reach out) Reach out for me
Hah, I'll be there with a love that will shelter you
I'll be there with a love that will see you through
My eye started tearing up again as I paid attention to the lyrics. Was Matt trying to tell me something through this song, or am I just reading too much into it?
When you feel lost and about to give up (to give up)
'Cause your best just ain't good enough (just ain't good enough)
And your feel the world has grown cold (has grown cold)
And your drifting out all on your own (drifting out on your own)
And you need a hand to hold, darlin'
(Reach out) Come on girl, reach out for me
(Reach out) Reach out for me
Hah, I'll be there to love and comfort you
And I'll be there to cherish and care for you
(I'll be there to always see you through)
(I'll be there to love and comfort you)
My heart was beating uncontrollably, my skin riddled with goosebumps. Matt doesn’t usually play music out loud, and now he plays this song. He was definitely telling me something, and the song couldn’t spell it out anymore clearly.
I can tell the way you hang your head (hang your head)
You're not in love now, now you're afraid (you're afraid)
And through your tears you look around (look around)
But there's no peace of mind to be found (no peace of mind to be found)
I know what your thinking
You're a loner, no love of your own, but darling
(Reach out) Come on girl reach out for me
Reach out, just look over your shoulder
I'll be there to give you all the love you need
And I'll be there you can always depend on me
I'll be there
Don’t worry
More determined than ever, I finished getting dressed and bolted out the door, and walked straight to Matt’s door.
My palms began to sweat, but I forced myself to stay strong as I rose my hand up and knocked on the door. The footsteps I could hear coming towards the other side of the door matched the heavy heartbeat within my chest. The door opened revealing Matt, dressed in grey sweatpants with the ends tucked into his grey tube socks, a navy blue hoodie zipped up but revealing a peak of a white t-shirt, his hair combed back and slightly wet from the shower he must’ve just taken; and for the first time since I’ve met him, his eyes were free of his usual red sunglasses, revealing his deep soulful brown eyes. He looked more beautiful than ever, and it simply took my breath away.
“Hi, Matt.” I spoke before I lost my nerve, keeping my focus on the task at hand.
Matt’s perfect lips rose in a soft and sweet smile. “Hi, Iris. Are you okay?” He asked, being the sweet gentleman he is.
“Yeah, I’m-” I started to automatically say before I cut myself off. Honesty. I have to start with honesty. I took a deep breath before I continued meekly, “No. I’m actually not okay. I haven’t been for a long time.”
Matt frowned in concern and sympathy. I spoke up once more, “That’s actually why I came to see you. Can we talk? I mean, if I’m not taking up your time of course. I can always come back later if this isn’t a good time.”
Matt rushed to respond before I considered backing off, “You’re not taking up my time, I’d love to talk to you. Please come in.” He opened his door wider to welcome me inside.
I stepped inside the apartment for the first time and noticed the space was almost identical to mine in terms of size, minimal amount of furniture as well.
“Would you like anything to drink?” Matt asked, being a gracious host. “I don’t have much except for beer and water, or I can make some coffee if you’d like.”
I shook my head with a smile, “No thank you, I’m fine.”
He then directed me towards the couch in the center of the room and took a seat with enough space apart to face each other. My hands started shaking as I tried to figure out what to say first. I decided the best to start with was an apology.
“I’m sorry.” I began as I shifted to face him. “For yesterday. The way I acted was inexcusable.”
Matt shook his head, “You don’t have to apologize, Iris.”
I fervently replied, “Yes I do. You’ve been nothing but kind and gentle to me, and I’ve been so terrible in comparison. You were so concerned about me and wanted to help me, and I repaid you by pushing you away and being so rude to you. You deserved better than that, and I’m so sorry, I’d understand if you didn’t want anything to do with me ever again. I wouldn’t want anything to do with me either-”
“Iris, stop.” He cut me off as he grabbed my hands in comfort. “I hate hearing you degrade yourself like that. You’re not a bad person. You’re a sweet and wonderful person, who has clearly been through something painful. And as long as you’ll let me, I’d really like to stay by your side more and help you in any way I can.”
My fingers gripped tightly to his hands, my eyes powerless to keep the oncoming tears at bay.
I took another deep breath before I finally got to the point. “You were right.” I started. “I am in trouble. I did go through something painful. I…”
Matt squeezed my hands slightly tighter in reassurance. “It’s okay, you can tell me.” He spoke with the utmost gentleness.
I used that bit of encouragement to finally reach the point of no return.
“His name is Paul.” Matt cocked his head in curiosity before I continued.
“My husband.” There it is. No turning back now. “He was hurting me. All the time.” My throat began to tighten at the memories. “At first he was so charming, sweet, loving. I thought he was so handsome and mysterious. He swept me off my feet instantly. Always doting on me, gave me gifts. I never really cared that he had money though, I just cared that he made me feel so loved, like I was all that mattered. When Mom had her stroke, I was devastated. It was just her and me, she was the only family I had left and I didn’t know how to take care of her. I was 20 years old, working minimum wage, I had no idea what to do. And Paul came in like a knight in shining armor. He paid for Mom to stay in one of the best nursing homes, he proposed to me and promised to move her in with us and provide a nurse to help me take care of her. He promised to make me so happy and loved.” I let out a scoff at my naïveté from back then. “I believed him of course. I married him in this big, expensive, show off ceremony he insisted we had to have. I was so in love and stupidly happy. I thought, ‘Life couldn’t possibly get any more perfect.’ And it didn’t.”
I looked away from Matt with a frown as I delved even further into the worst years of my life. “As soon as we came back from our honeymoon, everything changed. He had little obsessive compulsive quirks I didn’t know about before. The towels always had to hang perfectly neat and even on the rack. The cans in the cupboard had to be stacked neatly with the labels facing out. The house had to be completely spotless. The table had to be set appropriately. I learned the hard way how much he hated rules being forgotten.”
Matt’s body tensed up and his hands started shaking over mine. I continued further. “You could probably guess that he never followed through on his promise to move my mom in with us. His reasoning was that he loved me so much that he wanted to keep me all for himself.” I shook my head in disgust. “That’s also the reason we never had kids. He hates kids and hates the idea of someone stealing my attention away from him even worse. He got a vasectomy a month before we got married.” I cleared my throat to swallow down the lump of tears in my throat. “He took away my mom, my chance of being a mom, my music, my spirit. It didn’t take much to set him off and punish me as he saw fit. I was dying in there. He had been killing me slowly for three years.”
Matt’s voice cracked as he finally spoke up. “Oh god Iris, I’m so sorry.” He shifted a hand to intertwine our fingers together. “How did you get out of there?”
I knew he would ask me that. This was the part I dreaded. “I tried calling the police. A lawyer too. They were no help whatsoever. The best they offered was a restraining order. As if that would keep him away. I realized the only one who could help me was me. So I made the necessary arrangements I needed to make, and I escaped.”
Matt looked skeptical like he knew I wasn’t elaborating enough. “Is he looking for you?”
I shook my head, “No. He couldn’t possibly be looking for me. He has no idea what I did.”
His face scrunched in confusion. “That doesn’t make sense. How could he not be looking for you? How could he not know you left?”
My heart was beating rapidly as I took a deeper breath and replied.
“Because he thinks I’m dead.”
A/N: Annnnd that’s chapter 7! Chapter 8 will come A LOT SOONER this time around and it’s gonna be a flashback chapter. It’s gonna be rough, so be ready. I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, I hope it was worth the wait. PLEASE comment what you thought of the chapter and reblog, be sure to follow me and hit me up if you wanna get on the taglist. Thanks for your patience, I love you all! Until next time...*kiss noise*
Taglist:
@jobean12-blog @cametobuyplums @tomhollandeu @emilymarie0422 @lullabylike
#Every Breath You Take#daredevil fanfiction#matt murdock x iris#matt murdock x oc#matt murdock x reader#Daredevil#Matt Murdock
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What Hurts the Most
Featuring: Matt Murdock
warnings: Angst and sadness
summary: After a rough night Matt goes to the one girl who always takes care of him.
an: this was requested by @nkalli “Can you do an sad angsts matt murdock x reader?” I realized writing this all my Matt stuff seems to be angsty.
It had been a rough night to say the least. They laid in the same bed with a foot between them and the room was so silent it seemed to leave a ringing sound in the room. Matt wore nothing but his boxers that sat low on his hips. He was laying on his back with his hand holding his side that had a pair of cracked ribs. His breathing was pretty uneven because he was in so much pain. The night had left him stumbling into her apartment with a deep gash on right below his collarbone, that she had to stitch up as he sat at her kitchen table.
Biting her bottom lip, she stared at the man who seem to easily hold her heart in his hand. Luckily, he wasn’t careless with her heart, he was well aware she was in love with him. He went out of his way to make sure she didn’t get hurt, but knew at some point he was going to break her heart without even trying.
Laying on her side she reached her hand out slowly as it shook. She wanted to touch him to pull him close to her, but she knew she shouldn’t do. He wasn’t her boyfriend, and probably was never going to be. A normal friendship between a boy and a girl normally didn’t involve the boy getting the shit out of him and then crawling through her window beaten. Normally the girl wouldn’t have to stitch him up and then beg him to spend the night so she would know he was safe.
His eyes were closed as he attempted to get some sleep, but he wasn’t going to be able to sleep, at least not until him and the girl he was lying in bed with had a very important conversation. She was well aware he wasn’t asleep even with him laying there with his eyes closed. It was moments like this she was happy he couldn’t see her. Her eyes were puffy as tears gently slid down her cheeks.
Her hand reached out a little more so she could touch him, but before she was able to touch him, she pulled her hand away. She needed to tell him that she couldn’t take this anymore, but she was terrified.
“Matt?” her voice was shaky as she was unsure of if she should even be speaking.
“Yeah?” his eyes opened up as they blankly stared at the ceiling.
“What is going on here?” she whispered as tears continued to slide down her cheek.
“I’m a selfish asshole,” he groaned as his head moved so he was blankly looking in her direction.
“Why did you come to me and not Foggy?” she needed to know if he returned her feelings.
“Because for some reason even though I know I need to leave you alone, I can’t seem to stay away,” he sighed. He knew he was being selfish, that he was well aware of her feelings, and that he should respect them and stay away from her since he couldn’t give her what she truly deserved.
“I don’t want you to stay away, but I need you to know how I actually feel.”
He nodded his head and moved his arm from his stomach where it was resting onto the bed so it was about an inch from her hand.
“Matt I’m in love with you and I hate seeing you get hurt, but what hurts most of all is that I know that no matter how much I actually love you…” she hesitated knowing that no matter what was said right now she was never going to be able to take back anything she said. “I’m never going to be able to actually be with you. You won’t ever feel the same way, and I understand but I just need you to know that it hurts loving someone who doesn’t feel the same way.”
There was a silence between them as Matt was taking in everything, she had just said to him. He had known for a while that she was in love with him, and he had even let her know that he couldn’t be with anyone as long as he was the Daredevil that he couldn’t actually be with someone.
“Okay I regret saying all that,” she mumbled at the fact that he hadn’t even said anything in response.
“Hey,” he reached out and rested his hand on top of hers as he laid still on his back. “Give me a second to take in everything you just said to me. I know that you’re in love with me, and believe me I turn the feelings. I have for a long time, but…” he paused knowing that what he was about to say was going to hurt both of them. She attempted to brace herself for what ever was going to come after the “but”. “I can’t be selfish and put you in harms way. I love you too, but if someone finds out that I have someone that I love, you would be the first person that take to try to get leverage. Fisk knows who I am, and I couldn’t live with myself if you got hurt because of me.” His hand that was resting on top of hers gave it a gently squeeze.
Everything he had just said to her made her world feel like it was spinning. He knew Matt might have some sort of feelings for her, but she never actually expected him to say that he was in love with her too. As her brain was attempting to process the fact, he said he was in love with her, she was also realizing that it didn’t matter that they were in love, because they couldn’t be together.
“What happens here then?” she sighed.
“I’m not sure exactly, I should probably give you space,” he moved his hand away from hers.
She shook her head to herself refusing to let him walk away from her right now, “Matthew Murdock you don’t get to tell me you love me, and then say you should give me space.”
He slowly moved so he was sitting up and she laid next to him still in bed wondering if he was actually getting up to leave. He stood up and groaned as he grabbed his side.
“Are you seriously getting up to leave?” she asked quickly getting out of bed. He groaned as he reached on the floor searching for his suit that was on the floor. “Matt,” she got up and ran to the other side of the bed so she was standing in front of him. He didn’t say anything as he reached his hand out so he was cupping her round face. He stepped forward a little so there were on a couple inches between them, she looked up at him as he held her face with one hand. The tension between them seemed to grow even more she licked her lips as her breathing seemed to pick up. “Please don’t leave, I just poured my heart out to you,” she whispered.
“I’m so selfish when it comes to you, and its not fair to you,” he sighed as his thumb brush a tear of her cheek. “I want to give you the world, but I can’t.”
“I’m not asking for the world,” she reached up so her hand held his wrist. “I’m just asking for you to show me that you actually love me.”
“I can’t let you get hurt because of me,” he sighed. “I should start going to Foggy when I get hurt,” his hand was still holding her face as he attempted to convince her and himself that he needed to give her space.
“Matt, please don’t pull away from me, if you do that it will break my heart,” her hand held onto his wrist not wanting him to leave.
“We can’t be together, not right now at least,” he sighed.
Her breathing seemed to catch in her throat for a moment at what he had just said. The tears seemed to slide down her cheek even harder suddenly, and it was as if he held her heart in his other hand, and that he just crushed it.
“Okay,” she pulled away from him shaking her head. “You can have your space if you want it,” her voice was shaky has she was trying her hardest to not sob.
“You mean the world to me, and I don’t want to hurt you, but being me with me isn’t safe.” He reached out to grab her wrist. He needed her to know that he wanted to be with her, but it just wasn’t an option. “I already lost my first love, I can’t deal with losing you too.”
“Why does it feel like I’m losing you right now,” the tears continued to slide down her cheek.
“I’m sorry that can’t you everything,” he took step closer to her. She reached out and rested her hand on his chest and looked back up at him knowing that he was right. That even though she wanted nothing more then to be with him, she knew deep down inside that it wasn’t safe. She had watched him lose if first love, and she knew how much that destroyed him.
“I understand we can’t be together, but I can’t deal with losing you as my friend too,” she sighed.
Silently he nodded his head and leaned forward so his for head was resting against hers. She took a deep breath taking in their sudden closeness.
“I want to kiss you so badly, but I shouldn’t,” he mumbled.
Without saying anything she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. She kissed him as if this was going to be the only time ever that she was going to be able to feel his lips against hers. His strong hand moved up and rested on her cheek holding her close to him as their lips moved together. Pulling away slowly she let out a sigh.
“What happens between us Matt?” she asked wondering if things would ever be the same after tonight.
He sighed and said, “we attempt to be friends.”
“Okay,” she said softly. She didn’t want to be only friends but she knew it was for the best. “If one day you are the Devil in Hell’s Kitchen, would you actually give us a chance?” she asked needing to know if maybe one day they stood a chance.
He nodded his head and gave her a sad smile, “I’m not going to ask you to wait around for that day, but when I’m finally no longer the Devil I want to be with you.”
“Let’s go back to bed,” she reached down and laced her fingers with his. She led them back together the bed. Stood at the side of the bed as she crawled across the mattress. He slowly got back in bed groaning at the pain from his cracked ribs.
They laid in the bed they had been laying in the same positions they had been laying in before. Her hand was resting on the bed between them, slowly he reached over and laced his fingers with hers.
“Thank you for always taking care of me,” he said softly.
“I’ll always take care of you,” she said knowing that no matter what happened between them that she would always care about him.
“I hope one day that I’ll actually be able to give you the world,” he said gently squeezing her hand.
She couldn’t help but smile at the possibility that maybe one day they could be together.
All my taglist are open
@greenhouse-nurse @jobean12-blog @minahraven @lokilvrr @breezy1415 @tina8009 @theonelittleone @angelus320 @thisismysecrethappyplace
#my writing#marvel fanfiction#daredevil#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil x reader#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock imagine#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#requested#matt murdock fanfiction#marvel
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Masterlist of Karedevil moments - Daredevil Season 2
[Season 1] [The Defenders] [Season 3]
It took me long enough, but here it is: the masterlist of Karedevil interactions for season 2! I did that for season 1 and didn’t do it for S2 because there were so many more scenes, and pretty self-explanatory, “canon” as some would say. But I figured it’d be great to have one for S2 as well. Season 3 is coming soon, as well as the one for the Defenders. I hope this will be of use to vidders, gif makers, or simply Karedevil addicts! If you do use this, please let me know, like, reblog or tag me so that I know it’s actually useful to someone :)
Episode 1 - Bang!
Scene 1:
○ When: around 6′55
○ What: Foggy tells Matt Karen’s being suspicious about his... physical state.
○ Main quotes:
Foggy: "You know Karen’s been asking questions? The cuts, the scrapes, the bruises?”
Matt: “What did you tell her?”
Foggy: “You’ve a drinking problem.”
Scene 2:
○ When: around 8′50 (until 11′00)
○ What: Matt & Foggy get to the office, Karen’s already there taking care of the clients.
○ Main quotes: “And [we have] each other” (Karen)
Scene 3
○ When: 17′29 - 20′20
○ What: Foggy, Karen and Matt are at Josie’s. Foggy leaves and Matt and Karen chat and play pool together.
○ Main quotes: well, it’s more a scene to watch than to listen to.
Episode 2 : Dogs to a Gunfight
Scene 1:
○ When: 4′25
○ What: Foggy’s taking care of Matt after he was beat up by Frank Castle.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Where’s Karen?”
Foggy: “We’ve been through this!”
Matt: “Oh yeah that’s right. You... You sure she’s okay?”
Scene 2:
○ When: around 24′30 to 29′30
○ What: Karen pays a visit to Matt, who took a “sick day.” She tells hims she’s not that okay, he hugs her. Karen then tells him he can tell her what’s going on with him, anytime. They also talk about the Punisher. Karen thinks they all created him, and that he and Daredevil are not that different.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Come here. I’m glad you’re okay.”
Later
Karen: “Okay, let’s say this. When, or if you ever feel like you can tell me what’s really going on with you, I promise that I’m here. Is that a deal?”
Matt: “That is a deal.”
Later (29′10)
Karen: “Wait... Matt, I... We care about you. You’re worth... keeping around.”
Episode 3 : New York’s Finest
None
Episode 4: Penny and Dime
Scene 1:
○ When: 7′20-8′50
○ What: Karen helps Matt tie his... well, tie.
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “But... You’re feeling better?”
Matt: “Yeah... Now... with you.”
Scene 2:
○ When: 9′38
○ What: Karen, Matt & Foggy are seating next to each other at Grotto’s funeral.
Scene 3:
○ When: 14′55-16′50
○ What: Karen, Matt & Foggy are talking about the Punisher at the office. Then, Foggy leaves the two of them to talk.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “I think... You are...”
Karen: “Oh my God, you think I’m insane?”
Matt: “No, I’m kidding. Compassionate. It’s a good quality Karen. The stuff of saints.”
Karen: “Yeah, but I’m no saint.”
Matt: “I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear that.”
Scene 4:
○ When: 52′15
○ What: The trio is at Josie’s. Foggy leaves to order some drinks, so Matt and Karen are alone. AGAIN. (I see a pattern here, don’t you?) Matt asks Karen about her brother.
○ Main quotes:
Scene 4:
○ When: 53′59
○ What: Foggy and Matt are alone outstide of Josie’s, waiting for Karen.
○ Main quotes:
Foggy: “Careful, Matt.”
Matt: “What’s that?”
Foggy: “Keep going like this, you might just end up happy. And for a Catholic boy, it’s a pretty dangerous thing.”
Matt: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Foggy: “God speed, Matt Murdock.”
Scene 5:
○ When: 54′38
○ What: THEY KISS IN THE FUCKING RAIN
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “Do you mind the rain?”
Matt: “No.”
Karen, taking his hand: “Then I’ll walk you home.”
THEY KISS I REPEAT THEY KISS
Matt: “Can I take you to dinner?”
Karen: “Yes.”
Matt: “Tomorrow?”
Karen: “Yes.”
Matt: “Goodnight, Karen.”
Karen: “Goodnight, Matt.”
Episode 5: Kinbaku
Scene 1:
○ When: 5′57
○ What: Karen comes into the office carrying coffee. Matt and Foggy are there. It’s the first time they see each other since their kiss.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Is that coffee I smell?”
Karen: “What? Oh, yes, arabica for all!”
Matt: “Wow, thank you, you’re a goddess!”
Foggy: “Ok you two...”
Scene 2:
○ When : 9′50- 10′25
○ What: Karen and Matt talking at the office, the day after they kissed (and after Elektra came back into Matt’s life).
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “I don’t think you’re wrong about Castle, but it’s really simple, Karen. Just, I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Karen: “So, hum... Last night...”
Matt: “Last night? I don’t, what happened last night? At Josie’s? With Foggy? Something happened? Anything else?” *smiles like a goofball” Yeah, it was great. And I’d like to think I can do better, if we’re still on for dinner?”
Karen: “Hum, yeah, it’s a date.”
Scene 3:
○ When: 33′47
○ What: their first date *_* They’re at this fancy restaurant, they talk about work and are both being very awkward. Karen leaves for a few minutes, and meanwhile Matt gets a call from Elektra.
○ Main quotes:
Matt, to a waiter: "If I had to seem like I know everything there is to know about wines in the next 60 seconds, what would I order?” (it doesn’t seem like a very interesting quote BUT IT’S SO FREAKING CUTE BECAUSE HE WANTS TO IMPRESS KAREN)
Scene 4:
○ When: 40′10
○ What: Matt & Karen are eating at the Indian restaurant.
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “I wish you could see this place.”
Matt: “I can, if you describe it to me.”
Karen: “So, anyways, my favorite part is the ceiling. So it’s literally dripping with thousands of lights. They’re shaped like chilli peppers. It sounds really tacky, I know, but it’s not, it’s just... it’s magic.”
Scene 5:
○ When: 42′30
○ What: The end of the date, and the second kiiiiiiiiss
○ Main quotes: they sit, and...
Matt: “All right, I’m gonna kiss you.”
Karen: “You could come up... if you’d like.”
Matt: “I would love to...”
Karen: “But you won’t.”
Matt: “Not tonight.”
Karen: “It’s okay.”
Matt: “Can I tell you why? Because, I have this... incredible ability to bring disaster to the best things in my life, and tonight has been perfect. Don’t you think?”
Karen: “Yes.”
Matt: “And if I stop now, then I get to keep this one perfect night, and also I have the chance of keeping it going tomorrow *kisses her*, and the day after...”
Karen: “And the day after that...”
Matt: “Exactly” *kisses her forehead*
Karen: “Then I guess it’s good night, Mr Murdock.”
Matt: “Good night, Ms. Page.”
Episode 6: Regrets Only
Scene 1:
○ When: 9′50-12′18
○ What: at the office, Christopher Roth (Castle’s lawyer) is talking to Karen about her deposition.
○ Main quotes: Just a conversation between the trio!
Scene 2:
○ When: 13′48-18′34
○ What: Foggy, Matt & Karen pay a visit to Castle at the hospital + Karen and Matt hold hands at 15′58!!
Scene 3:
○ When: 18′44
○ What: Still at the hospital. Karen’s admiring Matt, as usual.
○ Main quotes:
Matt, to Karen: “We’re on shaky grounds, you need to be very careful.”
Scene 4:
○ When: 21′59
○ What: Matt kisses Karen on the cheek before he leaves to meet Elektra, the “new client that pays”.
○ Main quotes:
Foggy: “Woah, okay. Is this officially happening? Are you guys dating?”
Karen: “Hum... Ah...”
Matt: “Hum, we’re...”
Karen: “Not... labeling it.” Pause. Then, to Matt: “You know, why don’t I, why don’t I walk you out?”
Scene 5:
○ When: 22′27-23′40
○ What: Still at the hospital. Karen and Matt are talking outside the room.
○ Main quotes (aka the whole fudging dialogue):
Karen: “You think he’ll be okay, with this?”
Matt: “Yeah, I mean, it’s a pretty small office, it’s gonna take some getting used to.”
Karen: “Yeah, I guess.”
Matt: “But, I’m not misremembering, am I? It really was the best... curry on the planet?”
Karen: “Mmmm, yes. Great, great curry. Even better company.”
Matt: “I’ll try to make this [appointment] go quick.”
Karen: “You know what, Foggy and I have got our hands full with everything here, why not just make dinner for tomorrow night?”
Matt: “Yeah, can we?”
Karen: “Yeah.”
Matt: “And, thanks for backing me up earlier.”
Karen: “Well, I didn’t do it for us, I did it because helping Frank, getting to the truth, that’s the right thing to do. *Matt chuckles* What?
Matt, after he kisses her: “I know. All right.”
Karen: “Okay.”
Episode 7: Semper Fidelis
Scene 1:
○ When: 4′03-6′44
○ What: Talk at the office. Karen is going to visit Castle on her own. Yet another kiss (4th one)!
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Karen? You know you don’t have to do this by yourself.”
Karen: “It’s okay, Castle doesn’t scare me.”
Matt: “Maybe he should.”
Karen: “I can take care of myself.”
Matt: “I know. But I’d be saying it to Foggy. Or a Navy SEAL. *smiles* “Just watch you back.”
KAREN KISSES MATT.
Karen: “Promise.”
Scene 2:
○ When: 35′10-36′50
○ What: Matt arrives late to Frank’s trial... They all chat and Foggy leaves.
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “You let him down, Matt.”
Matt: “I know. Hey, I know. But I’m gonna make it up to him. And I’m gonna make it up to you.” *kisses her on the forehead*
Scene 3:
○ When: 36′51
○ What: Karen and Matt are getting dinner at his place.
○ Main quotes:
Matt, about the preparation for the trial: “It could take all night.”
Karen: “Well, I don’t mind. What?”
Matt: “You ever considered law school?”
Karen: “Oh, I don’t know...”
[...]
Matt: “Just thinking Nelson and Murdock might be more fun as... Nelson, Murdock and Page.”
Karen: “Ugh, you’re sweet, uh... I don’t know, I don’t know if law school is really the right fit for me. I guess there’s just something about the rules and the loopholes. I just feels like the truth gets lost a little bit too often.”
Karen: ‘You ever think back to the night we first met?”
Matt: “Yeah, all the time.”
Karen: “Will I sat in that police station, alone, I was afraid of the whole world. Well, at least until you and Foggy came into my life, and... you trusted me, you gave me hope. And then we came back to your place...”
Matt: “I offered you Thai food.”
Karen: “Yeah, God, I remember everything about that night, ‘cause it’s... not everyday your life is threatened, then saved by a man in black. Hey you, you believe in what he does? You know, the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen?”
Matt: “I, mmm, uh, I... I believe in the law. If, that’s what you’re asking.”
Karen: “Yeah, right. No, but... but what about when the law fails? Like it did with me, like it did with Frank? You know, what are we supposed to turn to? What sould we... what should we believe will protect us then?”
Matt: “See, you’re asking a Catholic lawyer.”
Karen, laughing: “I know...”
Matt: “What do you want me to say?”
Karen: “I don’t know, I guess it’s just...
ARGUE ABOUT FRANK, then call it a night.
Karen: “I don’t know, maybe after the trial’s over...”
Matt: “Yeah, real date next time.”
Elek*tra has been there all along, so Matt tells her: “She [Karen] is important to me.”
Scene 4:
○ When: 50′11
○ What: Shit’s going down after a big reveal in Frank’s trial.
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “No, no, no, no, you don’t treat me like I’m just you secretary, I’ve done more work on this case that you have!”
Matt: “I can’t get into this right now, Karen.”
Karen: “No, enough of the dodgy bullshit. I deserver to know what is going on with you two. With you.”
Matt: “You asking as my co-worker? Or my girlfriend?”
Karen: “Both.”
Matt: “Yeah. I am sorry you’re caught in the middle of this, but right now I have to go.”
Karen: “Where?”
Matt, leaving: “I’ll see you tomorrow, Karen.”
Karen: “Yeah, maybe” (Matt hears her, close up to his face)
Episode 8: Guilty as Sin
Scene 1:
○ When: 24′04
○ What: Matt is with Elektra, at his place, and Karen shows up unexpectedly.
○ Main quotes: well, it doesn’t last long enough really, Karen is shocked to see Elektra, she just tells Matt Foggy could use his help with Frank’s trial and leaves.
Scene 2:
○ When: 32′00
○ What: Frank’s trial, Matt shows up and tries to apologize to Karen..
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Karen, I’m so sorry about...”
Karen: “Uh, Foggy wants to walk through some things with you.”
Scene 3:
○ When: 39′21
○ What: After they lost Frank’s trial, outside of Court. Matt & Karen get into a fight.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Karen, let him [Foggy] go.”
Karen: “I don’t wanna hear it.”
Matt: “Karen, can I talk to you for five seconds-”
Karen: “I don’t want to hear another bullshit excuse. Maybe you are an alcoholic . Maybe you’re in a fight club. Maybe you are sleeping with a whole harem of women. I don’t care, I’m done. You’re right. This city really needs heroes. But you’re not one of them.
Episode 9: Seven Minutes in Heaven
Scene 1:
○ When: 23′50
○ What: Indirect scene, as Karen’s not there. Foggy came to see Matt at his place.
○ Main quotes:
Foggy: “What am I supposed to say to Karen?”
Matt: “I don’t know, same thing I’m telling you. [that he’s done apologizing for who he is]”
Episode 10: The Man in the Box
Scene 1:
○ When: 9′13
○ What: Matt & Karen meet outside of Court. It’s Karen who talks to him, he was just gonna climb the stairs without stopping. Well, he can certainly pretend he did not see her...
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “I, uh, see Reyes dragged you in too.”
Matt: “Karen? You all right?”
Karen: “Other than being hauled in as a suspect in the escape of a confessed murderer? Yeah, I’m great.”
Matt: “Yeah... This whole case has been a disaster. I’m sorry I pulled you guys into it.”
Karen: “Don’t be sorry.”
Matt: “How are you otherwise?”
Karen: “Good. Yeah, I’m good.”
Matt: “Good.”
Scene 2:
○ When: 15′39
○ What: Foggy, Matt & Karen are summoned by the DA. They all meet her in her office + gunshots, Matt shields Karen with his body.
○ Main quotes:
Matt, whispering to Karen: “It’s probably not a good idea...”
Karen: “Trust me.”
Episode 11: .380
Scene 1:
○ When: 8′28
○ What: yet another fight outside of the police station...
○ Main quotes:
Karen: “Matt.”
Matt: “Karen?”
Karen: “What are you doing here?”
Matt: “Brett reached out, something shot at you?”
Karen: “Yeah, it’s okay, I’m fine.”
Matt: “Why didn’t you call me?”
Karen: “Would you have answered? Look, Matt, I know you mean well, but I can take care of myself.”
Matt: “No you can’t, Karen! Not if Frank Castle wants you dead, no one can.”
Karen: “You’re right! You’re right! Castle’s dangerous, and maybe I can’t handle this, but I don’t want your help.”
Matt: “What’s going on with you? What are you holding back?”
[...]
Matt: “Then you need to back off.”
Karen: “No, Matt, you need to back off.”
Matt: “This is not a game, Karen, this is dangerous!”
[...]
Karen: “Look, I’m gonna, I’m gonna go...”
Matt, making a move: “I'm gonna come with you.”
Karen: “No! Matt, I'm.. I'm not yours to protect.”
Scene 2:
○ When: 21′20
○ What: Indirect scene, the friggin dialogue between Frank & Karen at the diner.
○ THE WHOLE DIALOGUE BECAUSE JFC:
Karen: “You're honest. You never lie to me.”
Frank: “Does he?”
Karen: “Who?”
Frank: “Come on. Let's not do that. Okay, the lawyer. Not the other one. Murdock.”
Karen: “Um... Yeah... He's got issues. It's complicated, like most people. Hard person to get to know. I just think that inside he's...”
Frank: “You love him, right?”
Karen: “You can't know that.”
Frank: “I'm sorry, can't know what?”
Karen: “You can't...”
Frank: “Come, we're in court, all that shit going on, it's all over your face. You can't hide that. You love him.”
Karen: “I might have... feeling for Matt Murdock, but it's just... it's just a swirl, it's a lot of things. Like, ingredients, not love.”
[…]
Karen: “He's the kind of man who hurts people. Not like you, but... he damages them. Breaks them.”
Frank: “Sorry, is that supposed to mean something?”
Karen: “So those are the people that you get out of you life.”
Frank: “Is that right? Look, I might be generally considered out of my skull, so this might not mean much, but this could be the craziest, most batshit thing I've ever heard in my life. People that can hurt you, the ones that can really hurt you, are the ones that are close enough to do it. People that get inside you and... and... and tear you apart, and make you feel like you're never gonna recover. Shit, I'd... I... I would chop my arm off right here, in this restaurant, just to feel that one more time for my wife. My old lady, she didn't just break my heart. She... she'd rip it out, she'd tear it apart, she'd step on that shit, feed it to a dog. I mean she was ruthless. She brought the pain. But she'll never hurt me again. You see, I'll never feel that. You sit here and you're all confused about this thing, but you have it. You have everything. So, hold on to it. Use two hands and never let go. You got it?”
Scene 3:
○ When: 48′16
○ What: Indirect scene, Karen comes to the harbor after Frank has supposedly been killed. Matt’s there, as Daredevil, and he listens to her heartbeat. They don’t speak, but they breathe the same air.
Episode 12: The Dark at the End of the Tunnel
None
Episode 13: A Cold Day in Hell’s Kitchen
Scene 1:
○ When: 17′10
○ What: Matt learns Karen’s been taken. AND HE LOSES IT.
○ Main quote: “He wanted to know the names of everyone you ever saved.” (Brett)
Scene 2:
○ When: 18′10
○ What: Matt goes to Karen’s place, she’s not there, he’s FREAKING OUT
○ Main quote: “Karen” (I am not kidding you)
Scene 3:
○ When: 21′31
○ What: Matt just learnt that Karen has been taken. He’s on the rooftop, trying to hear her, but he can’t focus.
○ Main quotes:
Elektra: “You can't just take the bait.”
Matt: “I know but I can't abandon them either.3
Elektra: “I know.”
Matt: “We gotta get ahead of this thing before any of them get hurt.”
Elektra: “Slow your breath. Focus. Okay. Focus. You'll find them. You'll find her, Matthew.”
Scene 4:
○ When: 27′30
○ What: Matt saves Karen, touches her face.
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “You're okay?”
Karen: “Better, now. Oh god... ”[seeing he's wounded]
Matt: “Go, go, go!”
Karen: “No, no, no, wait, wait...”
Scene 5:
○ When: 47′05
○ What: Karen and Foggy are having a drink at Josie’s.
○ Main quotes: “And now, not Matt...” (Karen)
Scene 6:
○ When: 54′05
○ What: the big reveal...
○ Main quotes:
Matt: “Thanks for meeting me.”
Karen: “What am I doing here, Matt?”
Matt: “I, uh, I have something...”
Karen: “No, I, I don't want it...”
Matt: “I have something... that I need you to see.” pause “I'm Daredevil.”
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Bad Habit 7-Don’t Ask Don’t Tell [Billy Russo x Reader]
A.N.: Your feedback means the world to me, my lovelies! Thank you so much!
Characters: Billy Russo x Reader, Karen Page, Frank Castle, Matt Murdock
Summary: Late night romance can be sweet. Or sarcastic.
Click here for: Bad Habit 1, Bad Habit 2, Bad Habit 3 Bad Habit 4 Bad Habit 5 Bad Habit 6
Click here to see the playlist for the first 4 parts!
Warning: Explicit language, cussing, mentions of sex.
Word Count: 3862
Please tell me what you think
Gif’s not mine!
You stared at the tiny paper, black dots starting to fly in your vision due to the throbbing pain in your stomach, but even that couldn’t get you to move. Your brain was working nonstop and you skimmed the two sentences, then gawked at the gun as Billy read it over your shoulder.
“Your brother?” he asked, his voice laced with fury, so much that it made you look up, “Your brother did this to you?”
You licked your lips, and turned around to walk back to the hall, gritting your teeth to hide the pain before you ran your fingertips over the wall that the bullet was stuck in.
“Y/N.”
“Yeah,” You got on your knees to touch the bullet, then tried to pull it back using your fingernails, “My brother.”
“Your brother tried to kill you?”
“He didn’t try to kill me,” You pulled the bullet back and put it into your pocket, “He tried to hurt me.”
“That’s fucking-“
“Billy,” You cut him off, surprised at your own calmness, “Look at the wall.”
“What?”
“Look at the wall.” You leaned your back to the wall, “And look at my height.”
“I don’t follow.”
“So if you didn’t tackle me down,” you motioned at the hole in the wall, then pointed at your leg, “The bullet would go through here, my leg, instead of anywhere fatal.”
Billy frowned, and crossed his arms, “How do you know?”
You shrugged, “I know how he thinks. This-“ You held up the paper, “This just means he’s in one of the closest hospitals now, waiting there to-“ You paused, “To talk to me.”
“Tough shit,” he said through his teeth, and his frown deepened as he eyed you up and down, “You’re bleeding.”
“I popped my stitches.”
A dangerous, almost feral shadow passed through his eyes, but it was gone so quickly that you couldn’t even be sure that you had seen it in the first place. He ripped the string off the door with an unnecessary force and grabbed his phone,
“Where is your stuff?”
“What?”
“Never mind, just get your meds, we’re leaving.”
“Leaving where?” You asked, completely confused while you grabbed the medicine bottle from the small bowl by the door as he texted someone, then turned to you with an impatient look in his face,
“You don’t really think you’re staying here tonight, right?”
“I’m not going to a hospital, I’d rather bleed out than see his face-“
“I’m not talking about the hospital,” he said as he tossed you a towel so that you could press it on your wound, “Go downstairs and get in the car, I’ll be there in a second.”
You snorted, “You left your car unlocked in this neighborhood?”
“Y/N,” he looked like he was at the end of his patience, “You’re losing blood, okay? It’s not the time to get smart, go downstairs and wait for me.”
You rolled your eyes “Only because you said please.”
“I didn’t say please.”
“I’m assuming you said it silently.” You shot back, and pressed the towel on the bleeding wound, then made your way to his car. Your hands were still trembling but you flexed your fingers, leaning your head back to the car seat and closed your eyes, trying to fix your breathing in hopes of calming yourself down and lessening the pain just a little. It wasn’t long until Billy opened the door to the driver’s seat and started the car.
“Now are you gonna tell me where we’re going?”
“My place.”
You sat up straighter and turned to him while trying to move as slow as possible, “Say what?”
“You don’t wanna go to a hospital, fine. You can’t stay in that dumpster after someone broke in and tried to shoot you.”
You shook your head fervently, “Just… just drive me to Karen’s, I’ll be fine.”
“Y/N-“
“I can’t stay at your place, don’t be ridiculous!” You cut him off, “What if- what if I rob you? What if I steal all your expensive suits and coats? Are you really sure you can trust me?”
He shot you a sideways look, “Jesus…”
“Billy, I’m serious!”
“So am I.” He said calmly, his voice didn’t waver, not one bit, as if you weren’t currently bleeding on his passenger seat, “We gotta patch you up.”
“Who’s we?”
“Me.”
“Are you secretly a doctor or something?”
“You really don’t know a single thing about the army, do you?” he asked, a note of disbelief evident in his voice as he made a turn, and you leaned your head back again, heaving a deep sigh.
“I like naughty doctor roleplay as much as any girl, but it doesn’t mean you actually have to do it.”
“Are you capable of saying anything that isn’t sarcastic?”
“No,” You deadpanned, with as much sarcasm as can be put into a word, making him shake his head a little but he kept his eyes on the road.
“I’m not paying for the car cleaning.”
“Oh no, how will I survive?” Billy said as he pulled over in front of a huge building and you let out a whistle, the throbbing pain in your stomach slowly reaching your head and you gritted your teeth as you pushed open the car door, and stumbled a little as a spark of pain shot through you as soon as you stepped outside.
“Motherfu-“
“Easy,” Billy rushed to help you and you pulled back slightly,
“I can walk.” You said through your teeth, still pressing on the wound and you both walked into the huge building. He steered you towards the elevator by placing his hand on the small of your back and the elevator doors opened with a small ding. He pressed the top button and you snorted,
“Why am I not surprised?” You mumbled as you leaned back to the mirror in the elevator, stubbornly ignoring your reflection. Why was it that every time Billy saw you, you had to be a mess?
The elevator opened and he walked to the door to unlock it. You stepped into his house, for some reason this felt way, way more intimate than anything you had ever done with him. You looked around with your brows raised, the huge living room on your right catching your attention immediately. It was minimalistic, but had an air of elegance still. The open kitchen was integrated with the living room, and to your left you could see a door that probably led to his bedroom.
“Get on the table.” Billy said, making his way to the bathroom and you walked into the living room, feeling out of your element.
“Can’t we just put a band aid on it?” You asked hopelessly as you pulled yourself over the table, cussing under your breath. The jet black table felt smooth under you and you dragged your fingernails on the surface, trying to ignore the sudden insecurity crashing down on you. Compared to your crappy apartment, this place looked like someone had pulled it out of an interior architecture magazine. Not that you expected him to live in a shabby apartment, but this…
This was way too much.
You were pulled out of your inner monologue when he walked inside with a wet cloth, and what looked like an army surgical kit, busy with the needle and you gawked at him, clearing your throat.
“You, um- you’ve got any chloroform?”
He looked up, biting the thin thread between his teeth, “Huh?”
“Nothing. You got booze?”
“You’re gonna go into a coma.”
“Fuck yeah I’m gonna go into a coma because you’re gonna be stitching me when I’m conscious.”
“It’s not gonna hurt that much.”
“Why do I feel like your ‘much’ and my ‘much’ are leagues apart?”
“Lie down Y/N.”
“You’re this bossy with every girl you bring home?”
He managed to shoot you a smirk for the first time in the last half an hour, still holding the thread between his teeth, “This is me being polite.”
You rolled your eyes and lay down to the smooth surface as he approached you and pulled your shirt up slightly so that he could pull the bandage and see the wound. As soon as his fingertips touched your skin, you felt goose bumps rising but you managed to bite your lip and looked at the ceiling, trying to distract yourself.
“Are you always this good at drawing danger to yourself?” he asked as he pushed the needle through your skin and you hissed in a breath, clawing at the surface of the table and tried to breathe through it.
“Hey, believe it or not, I actually had a boring life until you came along with your coat, being all mysterious and shit,” You gritted through your teeth as you blinked back the tears, “I suppose I should thank you though. I could have a shot leg right now.”
He shrugged silently and you winced at the sharp sting, then licked your lips.
“Billy?”
“Hm?”
“I almost got shot, fine, are you sure you’re okay?”
He shrugged again, “Stop fidgeting.”
“But it hurts!”
“Almost done.” He drawled out and you took another deep breath, and exhaled in relief when he ripped the thread with his teeth, then pressed a small kiss to your stomach, making you giggle, your cheeks burning as he looked up at you, his eyes shining mischievously.
“Done.”
You reached out to run your fingers through his slicked back hair and he abstractedly leaned into your touch, closing his eyes as if he was slowly losing himself in the feeling.
“Thanks.”
“Anytime,” he murmured, “Just…not anytime soon, please.”
You scoffed, “I’ll try my best at not getting shot.”
He opened his eyes but this time, the look in his eyes was less fiery, may it be because of your touch or your low voice. For the first time since you had met him, he didn’t look smug, but somehow at peace, as if your mere presence calmed him down a little. You pulled back your hand to sit up on the table carefully, and looked down at yourself, making a face.
“Um- You have anything you can give me? I gotta wash these, I can’t go to work tomorrow all bloody.”
“You’re going to work tomorrow?”
You shrugged, “Don’t blame me, blame the capitalism,” you said, “A sweater or something? It’s gonna be big anyway.”
He nodded slowly and pushed his chair back before standing up to walk to his bedroom. You pressed a hand over your chest to calm down your heartbeat a little, then ran your hands through your hair, trying to make yourself look at least presentable. He came back with a gray sweater and handed it to you.
“Bathroom is right down the hall.”
You nodded and walked to the bathroom, and closed the door behind you, looking around. It looked cleaner that your own bathroom, and more organized. You slowly got out of your shirt and jeans before you turned the water on, and kept them under ice cold water, trying to rinse off the blood. You pumped soap into your hands and onto the clothes and scrubbed at the blood stain until you were satisfied and it was all gone, then twisted the fabric to get rid of excess water before you pulled back to look at yourself in the bathroom. Your knees were already getting bruised from falling on them too hard, the stitches were very visible on the side of your stomach and overall, you looked really messed up. You shook your head slightly and wiped your hands, then got into Billy’s sweater, the warm fabric feeling nice on your skin as his scent reached your nose, making you smile. Even if you knew you weren’t supposed to, you couldn’t resist the urge to snoop around and you grabbed his cologne, smelling it for a second before checking the cream pomade, touching it with the tips of your fingers. You put it back to the sink, biting at your lip before pinching your cheeks to get at least some color on your face, and opened the door.
“You okay?”
“Mm hm.” You nodded, rolling up the sleeves over your wrists “So how much cash am I wearing right now?”
He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, “You hungry, Great Depression?”
“Starving.” You said, “Escaping bullets makes you hungry I guess.”
“Pizza?”
“Oh my God yes.”
The following hours went in a blur, which happened a lot when you were with Billy. Before you knew you had eaten a whole pizza by yourself and you were arguing with him over nonsense.
“That’s bullshit and you know it, Russo!”
“Seriously, if you’re gonna be defending teenagers who think they’re in love-“
“Excuse you, did you just say think they’re in love?! It’s Romeo and Juliet we’re talking about, of course they were in love!”
“He loved Rosaline and the next second the dude is all over Juliet, you’d call him a manwhore if he actually existed-“
“That’s true love!” You cut him off and he shook his head,
“You’re impossible to argue with.”
“I’m not gonna let you badmouth the greatest love story in the world.” You yawned and he tilted his head to the right.
“Sleepy?”
“A little, what time is it?”
He checked his watch, “4 in the morning.”
You shut your eyes and groaned, “Jesus, I have work tomorrow…” You whined and stood up, “Okay so… do you have like a blanket or something, I’ll just curl there.” You motioned at the couch and he pulled his brows together.
“Don’t be ridiculous, you’re hurt.” He said, “You’re sleeping in my bed.”
Your heart beat sped up almost immediately, “Billy, I… um-“
“I didn’t mean it like that.” He said calmly, “You really need to be careful with those stitches so I didn’t mean…“ he cleared his throat as you gawked at him, “It’s not like we could, even if-“
“Wait, what?”
“Y/N, you can’t pop your stitches again, so you need to-“
“So no sex?!” You blurted out, “What?! Dude, are you serious?!”
He looked somehow amused by your outburst and you shook your head slightly,
“Unbelievable. No sex, at all? What am I, in high school?”
“You didn’t have sex with anyone in high school?”
“No one had sex with me in high school.” You corrected him, and let out a whine, “But I was really looking forward to it!”
“Yeah I could tell.”
“With you!”
“I could tell that as well.”
“So we’re- what, we’re supposed to wait like an 18th century couple?” The words left your lips before you had any chance to stop them and your head shot up as you realized what you had just said, “I didn’t mean- I didn’t imply we were a couple. I just- like two people, in a non-couply way, not having sex- are you sleepy? I’m sleepy. Like very sleepy, maybe we should go to sleep. We should definitely go to sleep and not have sex.”
He just stood there, enjoying your visible nervousness and stumbling over your words and licked his lips.
“You’re done?”
You gulped “Yeah.”
“So yeah, you’re taking my bed.” He said, as if you hadn’t just cut him off and made a fool of yourself, but you shook your head.
“Okay, I’m just pulling this idea out of thin air, but what if we both sleep in the bed and no one sleeps on the couch?” You asked, your heart pounding in your ears and he raised his brows,
“You sure?”
“We’re both responsible adults.” To that, he snorted and you rolled your eyes, “Moderately responsible adults, whatever.” You stated, “I mean, why not? We already…kiss and stuff, why don’t we roleplay an old, boring cou-ehm, people.” You changed your mind mid-sentence and he shrugged,
“We already kiss and stuff?” he repeated, and you glared at him,
“Offer going once, going twice-“
“Fine. That is, if the 18th century lady won’t be scandalized?”
You flipped him, making him laugh and turned to walk to the bedroom. “Shut the fuck up.”
“See, we already sound like an old boring couple.” He called out from the living room and you opened the door to his bedroom, taking a tentative step into it. It resembled the rest of the house, simple but luxurious. The bed in the middle of the room was huge, which meant there was more than enough space for both of you. You slowly got into the bed to hide under the covers and almost slipped off the bed but managed to find your balance as he walked inside.
“Silk sheets?”
“Satin.”
“There’s a difference?” You asked while he flung himself on the bed, making you laugh as he pulled you closer.
“Hey,”
“Yeah, fancy boy?”
“Any pain?”
You shrugged slightly “Just a bit. I’m getting used to it, I think.”
He nodded, his fingers brushing your hair off your face and you sighed as he kissed you softly, making you close your eyes and drag your fingernails on the nape of his neck before he pulled back to peck you on the tip of your nose, making you giggle.
“Why did he do it?”
You opened your eyes “What?” You asked, still feeling all giddy inside and he brushed his knuckles against your cheekbone, making it very hard to focus.
“Your brother. Why did he do it?”
And just like that, the warmth inside of you was replaced with an ice cold stake. Your smile faded and you pulled back slightly,
“Billy…”
“I know, you don’t want to tell me. Figured as much.”
“It’s my mess,” you said slowly, “I don’t want to drag you into it.”
“And if I want to be dragged into it?”
You shook your head again, “You can’t be a part of this,” You mumbled, “My brother… he’s the type of a person you need to stay away from.”
“I think you and I both know that I can take care of myself.”
You bit inside your cheek, “My brother can be worse than war.”
“You haven’t seen the wars I’ve been in.”
“Neither have you,” You could feel the tears burning your eyes almost instantly, “Listen I…” You cleared your throat, “The only thing you need to know is that, he’s a horrible person. He got mixed up in some serious shit, and he broke my mom’s heart. My dad’s heart.” You paused, “My heart, I guess. He, um… The last time we talked, he said he’d actually kill me the next time he saw me.”
His jaw muscle twitched as he clenched his teeth, the familiar fire starting to burn in his dark gaze, but when he talked, his voice was controlled.
“He can try.”
You let out a bitter laugh, “He’s not gonna kill me,” you pointed out, “He will just… hurt me. I guess you understood that very clearly, tonight.”
“Y/N…”
“So if he’s that willing to hurt me, his actual sister, I really don’t want to see what he would do to you.”
“Do you honestly think he could hurt me?” There was something in his voice, something much deeper and more dangerous than just arrogance, as if he would actually dare him to even try, and you took a deep breath.
“I don’t…want to see you getting hurt.” The confession left your lips in a whisper and a silence fell upon both of you, until you cleared your throat.
“I really don’t want to talk about this right now.” You mumbled, drawing shapes on his chest with your fingertips, “I can only take so much in a day, and I just- I need this day to be over.”
He looked like he wanted to say no, but in the end he looked defeated by the look in your eye and nodded,
“Sure.” He muttered and pressed a kiss to your forehead and you relaxed in his warm embrace, “Go to sleep. You’re gonna feel better in the morning.”
“Do you swear?”
His low chuckled vibrated through his chest, making you smile slightly.
“Cross my heart.”
“Fuck!” You cussed under your breath as soon as you woke up and grabbed your phone to see the time. You were supposed to be at work fifteen minutes ago, so you pushed yourself off the bed, ignoring the sting in your stomach and rushed to the bathroom to get your clothes. Billy wasn’t in bed, so you figured he must’ve gone out or to work. You quickly got into your clothes and left the bathroom in a rush but stopped dead on your tracks when two figures in the living room caught your attention. Billy and an older man both turned to look at you, and the man frowned slightly, looking between you and Billy, who seemed intent on ignoring him even though he was in his living room.
“Hi,” You tried to smile, catching your breath, “I, um… I’m late for work.”
Billy nodded slowly, “Yeah, sorry. Forgot to wake you up.”
“No problem,” You said, stealing a look at the man and even if you wanted to kiss Billy goodbye, you figured it would be awkward in front of the other man, so you just nodded at him, “See you later.”
With that, you walked out of the apartment and took the elevator. Even if Billy had warned you about the stitches, you figured it was better to have popped stitches than being unemployed, so you ran all the way to the subway, took the train and jumped two steps at a time on your way out, and when you finally reached the café, you were out of breath.
“Dude, you look like a mess.” Vicky commented as you shed your coat and walked to the kitchen.
“I spent the night at Billy’s.”
“Oh really?” Liz asked, walking into the kitchen as well, grinning and you rolled your eyes.
“We didn’t do anything.”
“Why not?” she asked, following you as you walked to one of the tables and you shrugged,
“I have stitches, so we’re supposed to be careful.” You used air quotes, “It sucks.”
“I’d jump on him, stitches or not.” Vicky commented and you scoffed,
“Hurts like a bitch,” You muttered as you walked back to the counter and two policemen walked into the café, looking around before approaching you.
“Can I help you, officers?”
One of them nodded, “Yes. Y/N, Y/L/N?”
You frowned slightly, “Yes?”
“We need you to come to the police station with us, ma’am.” He said, and you pulled back slightly,
“Um-why?”
“One of your neighbors said there has been a discharge of arms in your apartment last night.”
You gulped, adrenaline filling your body before nodding and grabbed a paper and a pen, scribbling down the numbers as Vicky gawked at the police officers.
“What-“
“It’s okay.” You said, even if you felt far from okay and pushed the paper in her direction. “This is Karen’s number, and this is Matt’s. Call them after I leave.”
“Matt?”
“Matt Murdock.” You said as you walked towards the police “My lawyer.”
Part 8 is up!
#billy russo#billy russo imagines#billy russo imagine#billy russo x reader#billy russo reader#billy imagine#billy imagines#billy x reader#ben barnes#ben barnes imagine#ben barnes imagines#punisher#the punisher#netflix's the punisher#marvel's the punisher#marvel#netflix#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#frank castle#karen page#jigsaw#daredevil#the punisher imagine#the punisher imagines#punisher imagine#punisher imagines
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Inktober for Writers/Fictober:
Day 8- Impasse (Darejones)
Yikes, down to the wire with his one. And how do these keep doubling in size?! Oops. I still need to edit it, but I think I like where it went. Hopefully you do too. As usual, prompt list here, and links to previous days at the bottom. Thanks for reading! Also, sorry I didn’t add a read-more, but I’m posting on mobile because I Am lying in bed, trying not to fall asleep. And as far as continuity goes, could really fit with any of my other stuff, after they’ve gotten together. Enjoy!
Day 8- Impasse
Their first real fight is a bit of a doozy. And it hits him out of nowhere. For a while, he even worries that it might mean the end for them.
They are laying in her bed on a Saturday night, having just had some pretty damn good sex, talking and laughing and generally enjoying themselves. She’s getting sleepy, he can hear it in her voice, and the warmth radiating off of her is starting to make him sleepy too, like it’s trying to convince him to stay. But he takes a deep breath, trying to force himself to leave, because if he doesn’t get up now, he’ll stay until the morning, again. And that wouldn’t be bad, except for the fact that he hasn’t been to Mass in weeks, in so long that he’s forgotten just how long it’s actually been, and it’s starting to eat at him.
Her breathing is evening out, and he knows it’s now or never. So he inhales one last breath of her hair, and rolls to the edge of her bed. “Call me tomorrow if you want to get lunch. Or a drink.”
She groans and rolls toward him. “I didn’t take you for the ‘love ‘em and leave ‘em’ type, Murdock. What gives? I was just getting comfortable.”
He chuckles softly and stands, beginning the search for his clothes. He finds his boxers and steps into them as he answers her. “I need to get up early, and I thought it would be easier for both of us if I left now.” He bends again, this time grabbing his shirt and shrugging it on.
He hears the springs of the mattress wine faintly as she props herself up on an elbow and rests her head on her palm. “Must have a hot date. Should I be jealous?”
He can’t help but smile at that, laughing brightly as he finishes buttoning his shirt. “Nah. Father Lantom’s not really my type.”
She snorts a laugh as he bends to pick up his pants.
“Going to church, then? Huh.”
He raises an eyebrow as he steps into his pants. “Was that a good ‘huh’ or a bad ‘huh’?”
She shrugs. “Neither. Just an expression of my surprise.”
A frown furrows his brows as he buttons and zips his pants. “My going to church is surprising? I was under the impression that you knew I was Catholic.”
She heaves a heavy sigh at that. “No, I knew that. I just didn’t think you were a particularly … good one.”
He blinks at that, unsure of what to say, in no small part because she’s unknowingly given voice to a worry that plagues him constantly. An uncomfortable silence descends upon them as he struggles to find words, and he can hear her pulse rising with each second that passes. Finally, she can’t take it anymore and sits up, pulling the sheet around her lap.
“Look, I’m sorry. That didn’t come out right. I didn’t mean th-“
The sound of her voice breaks him from his trance, and he shakes his head, cutting her off. “Didn’t mean that as an insult?”
Her teeth grind the slightest bit as she sets her jaw, and the sound sends a shiver down his spine. Her tone is low and begrudging when she answers him. “Yeah.”
He raises his eyebrows once, then hangs his head. “It’s okay, I know. And even if you did, you’re not wrong. But that’s part of the reason that I need to go. It’s been too long.” He bends to pick up his tie and starts threading it under the collar of his shirt.
She licks her lips and turns away from him, her pulse speeding all the while, as though trying to decide whether or not to ask a difficult question. As he finishes tying his tie, she speaks, voice hesitant.
“So does that stuff really work for you?” She turns her head back toward him, and he can feel the look she’s giving him- like she’s scrutinizing him.
He can’t hold back a chuckle at the way she phrased that question. “What do you mean?”
She lets out an exasperated sigh that would make him laugh if there wasn’t suddenly such tension in the room.
“Does the stuff that you do- like going to church and being a Catholic, believing in God, and whatever else- actually help you?”
Her skeptical tone takes him aback almost as much as the question; he can’t seem to wrap his brain around it. His answer comes out sounding like a question also, because he’s still confused about what she’s asking him and why she’s asking it.
“Yes… otherwise I wouldn’t be going.”
The disgusted scoff she gives him at that sends a flare of anxiety up in his stomach. His heart starts to race because he doesn’t know where she’s going with this, but it doesn’t seem good.
“Don’t be an asshole. I’m serious. Do you honestly believe there’s a god out there, even with all of the suffering and pain and bullshit that exists in this world?”
Wow, he really didn’t expect that. Her words hit him like a punch to the gut. He hears accusation in her tone, as well as incredulity, and a hell of a lot of pain. A beat passes and he can do nothing but gape at her as his anxiety skyrockets.
But then he blows out a long exhale to try to calm himself, and puts his hands on his hips to help him feel more grounded. He can still feel her staring at him, and he has to work to regulate his breathing as he opens his mouth to answer her. But his answer is clear.
“Yeah, I do.”
But that doesn’t seem to be the answer she was looking for. He can’t understand why, but suddenly fury is radiating off of her like heat from the sun. Her voice is harsh, a mix of confusion and frustration as she pleads with him.
“H-how? How can you think that? You’re not a dumb guy, Matt, so explain to me how that makes sense.”
But he’s just as confused and frustrated as she is. “Jess, what is this really about? Because I don’t think those have to be mutually exclusive things. I don’t see why the existence of suffering is counter to the idea of God. We all have free will, and sometimes the decisions we make cause pain and suffering for others. That’s why it’s important that we try to follow God’s teachings- so we don’t end up hurting other people.”
Somehow, he keeps picking the exactly wrong things to say to her. Because now she’s seething. He thinks that, if she were clothed, she’d be pacing the floor and pushing into his personal space.
“Right, right. So, let me see if I have this straight- it’s all God’s plan until it isn’t, because of good ol’ free will. And the truly evil people in the world, well, they just need to learn to make better choices. But that’s totally on them, no responsibility at all for the guy who allowed the situations to occur that taught those people to make bad choices. It all makes sense to me now.”
The more she talks, the more his hackles are rising, but he doesn’t want to fight with her. Hell, he’s still unsure of exactly how this fight started in the first place. He takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of his nose as he lets a beat pass. Then he speaks to her in a soft, calm voice.
“Jess, I’m sorry I upset you. I don’t know how we got here, and I really don’t want to fight. So maybe we should both just take a breath and agree to disagree for now. We can save this conversation for another time- when it’s not almost midnight and when we’re both … dressed.”
He hears her scoff at that, but counts it as a win, because she seems much calmer when she answers him. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have-“ she heaves a sigh, and her hands shift on the bed, as she takes hold of the sheets, as though they are her anchor. Then she tries again.
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to start a fight, either. And I’m not angry at you. But I have a lot of problems with religion and the idea of God because… I’ve seen the actual face of the devil, and I can’t imagine a God who would allow anyone to be subject to his torture if he actually cared about anyone on this piece of shit planet.”
And just like that, the final piece of the puzzle clicks into place. No wonder she has such strong feelings about this topic. From what he’s read, Kilgrave is the closest thing to the literal incarnation of the devil he’s ever heard of, even more so than Fisk. And that’s saying a lot. Her arguments make a lot more sense when he’s considering the lens through which she views the world. But it’s still not a problem they’ll solve tonight.
“It’s okay. Those are discussions I would be happy to have, at some point. But Jess, please know that just because I believe that we all have free will doesn’t mean that I think you deserve what happened to you. Because nothing could be further from the truth. And a part of me wishes that bastard was still alive so that I could give some of his own medicine, Catholic or not.”
She’s silent for a few moments, and his heart threatens to hammer out of his chest because he’s afraid that for the third time tonight, he’s said the wrong thing to her. He really didn’t mean to add that last part, even though it’s true, for fear that he might frighten her with the intensity of his reaction to that bastard, Kilgrave.
But then she breaks the silence, voice flat and nonchalant. “I guess that’s what confession is for.”
He chuckles in spite of himself and gives her a smirk. “Something like that.” He crosses the few steps back to the bed and traces the line of her cheek before he moves his hand to thread through her hair and pull her closer so he can place a kiss on the crown of her head. She sighs softly at the gesture, and he says a silent prayer of thanks that he did not see to ruin things between them.
He steps back, but she grabs his hand before he can step out of her reach. “Have fun being a good little Catholic boy.”
“I will. Call me tomorrow if you want to talk. Or if you’d rather do something more enjoyable.”
She chuckles and squeezes his hand once before dropping it. He turns and heads for the door. She calls to him before he reaches the threshold.
“‘Night, Murdock.”
He turns to call back to her over his shoulder as he crosses to the front door. “‘Night, Jones.”
And then he’s leaving her apartment, mind going a million miles a minute as he processes the last half-hour. They survived their first fight, though it was touch and go there for a bit. And even if they weren’t able to settle their argument, they were able to reach an understanding for the time being. And maybe it’s better this way, because it will give both of them time to formulate their thoughts for the next time they have the chance to discuss the issue. But until then, he’s happy to know that she cares enough about him to have broached such a personal and intense topic. And he’ll use whatever opportunities he is given to remind her of the fact that what happened was not her fault.
If he can convince her of that, maybe he can get her to consider his perspective a little more seriously. But in the end, all that he really cares about is that she is able to work through her feelings about the awful things she has experienced and find peace. And he’ll do whatever he can to help her with that process, impasse be damned.
Day 7 | Day 9
#inktober for writers#fictober#my fic#a prompt a day#matt murdock x jessica jones#matt x jessica#mattjess#darejones#messica
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