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babydollmarauders · 6 months

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TOLERATE IT — JOHN MARINO

john marino x fem!reader

summary: in which y/n’s love is tolerated at best, and she wonders what ever happened to her loving boyfriend

warnings: not much dialogue in the beginning?, happy or sad ending depending on the way you look at it, not proofread.

notes: i love writing angst but as a john girlie, this hurt me— but i did this to myself

the page turns, John’s fingers skimming it gently.

his head is dipped low, one leg perched on the other. he’s sat on the other end of the sofa, engrossed in his book; whereas i pay no attention to the movie that plays on the tv, rather watching him instead.

his demeanor is peaceful, and i know better than to actually disturb him. this is some of the only time he gets to relax, and i don’t want to take that away from him. so i sit quietly instead, just enjoying the rare company.

but i can’t help but wish he would actually do something with me. watch a movie, cuddle, talk, anything. instead i’m subjected to medium silence and the sound of paper flipping.

i turn the tv off, rising from the couch, and his eyes flicker up at my movement, but he dismisses it quickly, going back to his book.

“i’m going to bed.” i tell him softly, quietly yearning for him to join me, but instead he just hums in acknowledgment. “are you gonna join me?”

his eyes scan the page for a few more seconds as i stand before him, waiting for his response. finally, he looks up at me properly, shaking his head.

“no, i’m good.”

my heart sinks at his reply, but i nod, “okay.”

i spend my entire bedtime routine hoping that he’ll walk into the room. that maybe he’ll change his mind and for once, we’ll go to bed together; like we did early in our relationship. but when i climb into an empty bed and he’s still in the living room, i have to accept the fact that it’s not happening. that those days are apparently over.

i stir in my sleep, shifting under the weight of an arm draped over my waist, and for a second my heart leaps in my chest, thinking John has decided to cuddle me as i slept. but when i turn under his touch, my eyes fluttering open, i find him asleep. the spooning an unconscious movement, and as soon as it’s started, it’s already over, his arm drawing back as he moves in his slumber to lay on his back.

i settle on my side, resting my head in my hand as i watch the steady rise and fall of his chest in the darkness of the room. the silence piercing as i watch him breathe.

what ever happened to the boy who held me as we slept? the same one who comforted me when people criticized our five year age gap. the one who told me he would do anything to keep me happy.

***

my heart races in my chest as i set the dining table.

the usual plastic plates and cups being replaced for fine china and wine glasses. a singular candle is lit in the middle of the table, next to the steaming pasta that waits to be served. homemade french bread sits beside it, a dish of herb infused butter resting atop of the wood as well.

i spent all day in the kitchen, making everything from scratch. the noodles, the sauce, the bread, the butter, all done today by me. as well as John’s favorite chocolate cake, in which i got the recipe from his mother.

it’s officially our two year anniversary, and i took advantage of the fact that John had practice today and then was going to the gym. i figured a slightly early dinner and then dessert would be a good plan before i gave him his present and then hopefully we would make our way to the bedroom.

but now i sit in my seat at the table, awaiting his return. he had told me he would be home by six, but the clock on the dining room wall displays that it’s a quarter past seven and he still isn’t home.

i’ve stuck the food into the oven to keep warm at this point, but the empty chair across from me and the soft music that floats through the house taunts me.

“alexa, stop the music.” the instrumental cuts off abruptly, tears welling in my eyes at my boyfriends absence.

i’m just about ready to eat by myself and call it an early night when i hear the front door open, footsteps echoing through the house, getting closer and closer. they halt when he reaches the dining room, and i look up to find him standing in the doorway.

his brows are threaded together, his gym bag slung over his shoulder.

“you made dinner?” he questions, setting his bag on the ground beside him.

i perk up immediately, disappointing myself with how quickly i’m ready to move past his lateness.

“yeah.” i smile, motioning toward the empty seat. “take a seat, i’ll go grab it out of the oven! i was waiting for you to get home.”

he nods, sitting down as i scurry towards the kitchen. i bring the pasta and bread and butter out one at a time before taking my seat across from him.

i’m on the edge of my seat, eagerly awaiting his praise for my cooking and the setup, or even just a ‘happy anniversary, baby.’ but it never comes. we eat silently as he scrolls on his phone, and when he finishes his food, he quickly stands to dismiss himself.

“wait!” he stops at my shout, furrowing his brows at me. “i made cake.”

my eyes are soft, silently begging him to stay.

despite the fact that he evidently forgot our anniversary, i’m still eager to please him; vying for his attention and love, the best i can.

he nods, settling back down in his seat.

“dinner, cake, wine, and glass plates?” he laughs, “you were feeling fancy tonight.”

my heart shatters in my chest. even though i know he forgot the date, it still hurts to hear him speak like it’s just another day. proving even further that he doesn’t know how special today is.

“well, yeah, it’s-” i’m so close to reminding him, but then i think of how guilty he’ll feel, and i stop. “it’s just been a good day.”

i plaster a smile on my lipstick covered lips, hoping he’ll buy it; and he does. he gives me a small smile back and i excuse myself to the kitchen, taking a moment to blink back tears before i cut into the cake, setting a slice on a plate and hurrying back to him.

i place the dessert in front of him, before sitting back down, just watching him as he eats. i’m no longer in a cake mood, my appetite gone as i push my still only half eaten pasta around my plate.

“Jack said hi, by the way.” he speaks between bites and i hum.

“that’s nice, i’ll have to text him.” i acknowledge. “i talked to your mom today.”

“you did?”

“yeah, i called her for the cake recipe.” i explain. “she said to tell you to call her.”

maybe she can remind him what day it is, seeing as she remembered it as soon as i called her.

“okay, i’ll call her soon.” he tells me, finishing his last bite before he stands once more.

“anything else, or can i take a shower now?” he asks, as though i’ve inconvenienced him somehow.

“you can shower.” i wait until he’s walking away, heading down the hallway to our room before i speak again, lowly whispering. “happy anniversary.”

i know i deserve better; that my love should be celebrated. i know that i deserve someone who will remember our anniversary; maybe even someone who will get me flowers just because and who will spend time with me and appreciate my love rather than tolerate it, but i love him.

***

i sit backwards, on my knees on a chair in the living room, facing the front door. i wait eagerly, checking the time on my phone religiously.

i know John should be home soon. a week long roadie finally ending with his long awaited return.

it’s half past two in the morning, much later than i normally stay up, but i refuse to let him arrive home without a proper welcoming.

my eyes are half lidded, but excitement still courses through my veins, remembering his three goals and seven assists in this past four games.

i perk up at the sound of the front door unlocking, watching with baited breath as it creaks open. John steps through the doorway, looking exhausted, slipping his shoes off and dropping his roadie bag on the floor.

i squeal excitedly, gaining his attention as i hop off my chair and run straight into his arms.

“welcome home, Johnny!” i cheer, snaking my arms around his neck, and jumping up to wrap my legs around his waist.

he stiffens for a split-second, letting out an ‘oomph’ before his hands fly to my butt to hold my weight.

“jesus, y/n, warn a guy, would you?” he huffs out a laugh and i lean back to look at his face, expecting a smile but all i see is a blank expression and tired eyes.

i give a sad smile, unwrapping my legs and letting my body slide down his.

suddenly, i feel incredibly insecure, my happy mood diminishing and quickly being replaced by regret.

“you’re right, i’m sorry.” i breathe out, backing away. “i guess i was overly excited.”

i turn quickly in order to keep him from seeing my now glassy eyes, tears threatening to spill as i retreat down the hall to our bedroom.

i don’t expect for him to accompany me, but suddenly i can hear his footsteps behind me, slowly following.

“what was that?” he questions as we reach the bedroom.

i can feel myself reaching my boiling point, choosing to ignore his words as i walk into the en-suite bathroom. i turn the shower water on, but he follows me into the bathroom too.

“y/n.”

y/n. not ‘babe’ or ‘love’. just y/n.

i swallow the lump in my throat before i turn to face him.

“aren’t you gonna go to bed?” i ask in attempt to avoid his question. “you seem tired.”

“aren’t you?” he raises a brow, and i shake my head.

i jab my thumb towards the shower behind me, “i’m gonna shower first.”

“i see that.” he huffs. “what was that? you just walked away from me.”

i sigh, knowing what’s finally coming, and turn to shut off the shower water before facing him again.

“doesn’t feel good, does it?” i walk around him, back into the bedroom, but he’s hot on my heels.

“what?” his hand grips my wrist, spinning me back around to look at him. “what are you talking about?”

“look, if this is all in my head, tell me now.” i start, only confusing him further by the looks of his expression. “but, you don’t love me anymore.”

tell me i’ve got it wrong.

he closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before he opens them again. “what are you even saying? i’m dating you, aren’t i?”

“are you?” i laugh bitterly, taking a couple steps backwards. “or are you tolerating me?”

“y/n,” he sighs, shaking his head. “you’re tired. and i must’ve upset you somehow, but you’re not making any sense.”

“you don’t appreciate me!” i shout, my hands gesturing wildly in the air.

“i cooked a nice dinner for our anniversary and you were late and forgot the date! and while you’re off playing hockey and winning games, where am i? here! i sit here and polish plates until they gleam and glisten. i clean the house and sit and wait for your return, and then when you do get home, you don’t even seem happy to see me! at all!”

John blinks in surprise at my outburst, his lips parting to speak, but i cut him off before he can get a word out.

“i made you my everything and you don’t even seem to care! i’ve been begging for you to love me again but i’m done! what happened to the man that assured me that my past relationships didn’t define me? the you that actually spent time with me?”

my chest heaves as i regain my breath, watching his expression change from confusion to defensiveness.

“i spend time with you!” he huffs and i roll my eyes.

“no, you sit and you read or you watch games or you do something by yourself on the other side of the couch.” i clarify dejectedly, nearly ready to give up. “you don’t do things with me. and if i try, you wave me off.”

“i just- i don’t understand where this is coming from.” he tells me, and i slump on the end of the bed, furiously wiping away tears that have begun to fall.

“that’s just it. you assume i’m fine with this, because i’ve let it go on for too long. i’ve sat here, and i’ve painted you in the best colors, and i’ve put you on this pedestal. i told myself that if i just did more- if i just did anything you could ever hope for- then we would be fine. that eventually you’ll love me again and you’ll treat me how you used to and we would be happy. but instead i watch you live your life and i’m delegated to the sidelines, begging to be even a minor part of your life. you tolerate me living with you. you tolerate my existence. and you tolerate my love.

“but i’m done. i can’t do it anymore.” my face falls in my hands, sobs wracking my chest.

i’ve finally given up.

John is quiet, but i can hear his feet padding against the floor for a moment, moving farther away before he comes back.

his fingers spread across my thigh, and when i drag my hands away from my face, opening my eyes to look at him, he’s kneeled on the floor in front of me.

“i’m sorry that you feel i don’t love you anymore. i never meant to make you feel like you’re just tolerated in my life. but i promise you, i see you. i do appreciate everything you do for me, and the love that you give me.”

his hand leaves my skin, fumbling with something in his grasp before holding it up.

my heart skips a beat, those butterflies returning in my stomach as my lips part in surprise. my eyes lock in on the diamond ring that sits in the little black velvet box in his hands.

“i promise, you’re not just going tolerated. i love you, and i want you in my life forever.” my gaze flickers up to his face, and i already begin nodding my head. “will you marry me?”

i nod even faster, an excited grin spreading over my lips, and he smiles softly, removing the ring from the box and slipping it onto my outstretched finger.

i admire it for a second, appreciating how right it looks to have a ring on my finger.

this is it.

this is what i did it all for.

what i’ve waited my whole life for.

my hands cup his face, pulling him in to press my lips to his.

“i love you.” i whisper, my lips still burning for his, and in response, he pulls me in for another kiss.

when we finally part, we begin to get ready for bed, effectively ignoring the outburst i just had. and once we climb into bed, i kiss him once more, melting into his touch like i used to.

“i’m sorry, you must be tired. i took up so much of your time tonight, you could’ve been asleep by now.” i mumble, listening to his heartbeat under the weight of my head.

“it’s okay. don’t apologize.” his fingers run through my hair and he turns off his bedside lamp, blanketing the room in darkness. “i love you.”

i fully plan on responding, but amongst the comfort, my eyes have already turned heavy, and speaking feels like too much work. my breathing evens out as i bask in the closeness of this moment.

i love him.

#john marino #john marino x reader #john marino imagine #john marino fic #john marino blurb #nj devils #nhl fic #nhl imagine #faithlynn’s writings <3

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disillusioneddanny · 1 year

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The Savior, The Reaper, and The Champion

Today was a bad brain day. That was the first thing Danny had realized as he laid beside Tim and let the other man rest his head on Danny’s bicep. On the other side of the human, Conner laid down, wrapping his strong arm around the man’s waist and burying his face in between Tim’s shoulder blades.

No one ever tells you that being a supervillain is so fucking hard. That there would be days where you struggled to even get out of bed. When they had each chosen this life, they knew it would be hard. That there would be days where they questioned if what they were doing really was for the greater good of the world–even if the Justice League didn’t see it that way.

That was the biggest thing, Danny had mused. They weren’t really villains, not to anyone except for the Justice League and the eyes of the government. Most of the citizens in this world loved the duo.

“It’s okay, we’re here,” Danny whispered as Tim let out a sob. He ran his fingers through his hair as he and Conner held their little super genius close. Today was one of the harder days. It was the anniversary of the day Bruce Wayne had officially disowned Tim Drake. It was a bittersweet day considering how it had ended between them. On one hand, Tim had felt liberated, no longer under the thumb of Batman, the World’s Greatest Detective and Control Freak. But on the other hand, he had lost the only real father figure he had ever had.

The day Tim had gone on his own, he had lost practically everyone. Danny wanted to hate Bruce for it, but it had also been the reason he had met Tim in the first place. It had been just five years ago now, the day that Tim had first summoned Danny.

He pressed a kiss to Tim’s head as another sob wracked through his lithe frame and Conner’s arms tighten just a bit around Tim as the man buried his face in Danny’s chest.

“We’re here, we love you,” Conner whispered in Tim’s ear, voice hushed, calming.

They had met just a few days after Tim had gotten into a screaming match with Bruce–a fight that Conner and Danny still didn’t have all the details for. He had gone off on his own, determined to destroy the League of Assassins once and for all and to have Ra’s Al Ghul die by his hand. He had summoned the Ghost King to find out about the secrets of the Lazarus Waters. Upon learning about them and Ra’s, though, Danny had decided to help get rid of them for good. No one was meant to live forever, not the way Ra’s was doing it at least. It was easy to say that once Danny learned of how the assassin cult was using the corrupted ectoplasm, he was more than ready to help take them down.

Between the two of them, they had completely destroyed the League and Ra’s. Upon learning about it, Tim’s family had been horrified. Apparently they had been holding out hope that he wouldn’t go through with his plans, that he wouldn’t fall so far and fast from the pedestal he had once stood on as Red Robin. They had cut him off, decided that Tim had crossed a line and they were unwilling to forgive him for it. Surprisingly, the only one who had stayed in touch was Jason.

“Family pariahs have to stick together,” he had said. It also hadn’t helped that Danny had managed to heal the pit rage inside of him and supplement it with a healthy ghost core.

The others, though, had declared Tim a rogue for his actions. Dick had even gone as far as saying that Tim had hit supervillain status and was on the same level as Lex Luthor. Danny didn’t see it that way. In his opinion, all they had done was get rid of an organization that would never truly stop killing, no matter how many times Batman and co. fought them.

“I just want to forget about it,” Tim whispered, his fingers bunched in Danny’s shirt.

After they had destroyed the league, the couple had fallen in love, they had finally found someone who was at the same level. They were the perfect puzzle pieces for one another. And once Danny had felt close enough to Tim, he had told him his trauma, shared with him the pain he had never told another living soul.

And Tim? Well he went out that very night and placed a few explosives in just the right spots. And they had done their jobs. The GIW and the Fentons would never harm Danny again. He had the vivisection scars to remind him of the pain that they had caused but he would never see them again. It was then that the young ghost king had decided that he would follow Tim to the ends of the earth, do whatever Tim wanted from him.

He may have been the Ghost King but Tim was his monarch and he was prepared to worship him any time and any place, prepared to do whatever bidding he desired. And it was then that Savior and Reaper had made their names known far and wide.

Tim had declared himself the savior, promising to destroy those that the Justice League were too cowardly to fight, and he had declared Danny his loyal right hand man, his knight to command, his reaper.

The people saw them as heroes, finally doing what others wouldn’t. Everyone else saw them as supervllains. TIm liked to call themselves the necessary evils. Conner liked to say that they were just doing what the heroes were too cowardly to do. They were willing to darken their own souls if it meant saving others.

They had run into Conner shortly after Reaper and Savior had killed the Joker and sent his soul to the Nightmare Realm where he would suffer for all of eternity. He had known Tim from his heroes days and knew that if anyone would help him, it would be Tim. Soon Savior, Reaper and their newest member,Champion, had made their move and Lex Luthor had become their newest target. For a man who had done so much damage, it had been laughable at how easy it was to kill him once and for all. Danny had made sure to give him a special place in the Nightmare Realms for the pain he had caused Conner.

The team had made a name for themselves, they hadn’t come up with a name but Danny had heard the whispers of stories and myths, of how others would reverently call them the world’s new furies. They had become gods of vengence. Tim had been likened to Alecto for being unceasing, Danny had been compared to Tisiphone for being avenging, and Conner had been dubbed Megaera for being grudging.

So they had taken it for themselves, the Furies of the New World they were called, or just Furies for short.

“I know you do, baby,” Danny murmured. “But it’s a part of you, it’s who you are.”

“I miss them,” Tim said with a whimper, curling in on himself. Oh their fearless leader, Tim who had called himself Savior and swore to protect the world from injustice, who despite himself being powerless himself, kept two of the most powerful beings on tight leashes behind him, ready to unleash them into the world on his command. And yet he still was just so small, he trusted Danny and Conner so much that he allowed them to see through the facade, to force their way through the cracks and see the broken man he had become.

Some say that you have to sell your soul to become a fighter for the people. Danny was pleased to say it wasn’t true, he saw Tim’s soul, saw his love to his bones and knew him better than anyone in the world.

“I miss talking to Alfred, sparring with Bruce, late night Bat Burger with Dick–I miss my life. I just, was this all a mistake? Is Bruce right? Did we go too far in our mission? Did I lose my family for nothing?” Tim whispered, wracking his fingers through Danny’s hair, petting him slowly. The ghost nearly purred at his lover’s touch.

“We can stop if you want,” Danny offered quietly. “I can get Clockwork to reset time, let us start all over, let you decide-”

“No,” Tim said sternly. “I don’t want to forget what we’ve done. We’ve helped too many people for that. I’m just being a baby,” he said softly, folding in on himself slightly.

“We can have Danny take us to a completely different dimension,” Conner offered, his thumb rubbed along Tim’s hipbone. “We can make new lives, leave all of this behind. We’ll make you happy, Tim, happier than you can even imagine.”

“We’re still needed,” Tim said, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “We still have so much to make right, to fix. I just miss the life I had, it doesn’t mean I hate the new one. I’m sorry-”

“Don’t be,” Danny told him seriously, moving to rest his head on his hand and looked down at Tim. “We all have our days. Timmy, my parents cut me apart limb from limb and there are still days I miss them, where I miss the life I had before all of this. It’s how the world goes.”

“The two of you make life so much easier,” Tim whispered, looking between his two lovers, tears collected in the corners of his eyes. Conner swiped a thumb across both, wiping them away. “I’m glad I have both of you here with me, I feel less insane, less out of control.”

“You’re not insane or out of control,” Danny murmured before he pressed forward and kissed Tim’s pouty lips softly.

“Yeah,” Conner murmured, pushing Tim’s shirt up slowly so that he could tweak a nipple softly. “You’re our fearless leader.”

“And we’re your strong henchmen,” Danny finished, and nipped at Tim’s nose, making his precious lover giggle.

“You aren’t henchmen, we’re partners,” Tim argued, glaring at both of them. Danny and Conner just grinned at one another before they looked at Tim.

“Nope,” Conner said. “You’re the brains and we’re the brawn.”

“We’ll follow you anywhere,” Danny said reverently. “Why do you think I call you my Northstar?”

#dp x dc #dp x dc au #dc x dp #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp crossover #Tim x Kon x Danny #super dead tired #superdeadtired #diswrites #dis writes

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ugly-pickle · 4 months

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you will always come first ☆ ayato

CHARACTERS: ayato x gn!reader

SYNOPSIS: you start to think that he values his duties more than you… but you are proven wrong

GENRE: fluff 💿

W/C: 0.5k

C/W: kissing, physical touch, cussing, and if you squint your eyes you can see some neglect (if theres anything ive missed please let me know!)

A/N: i finished my scara angst at 4:30am… it is currently 7am and i have JUST voted on my own poll……… i have not slept yet. not proofread!

it’s been a while since youve went on a date, or at least do something romantic with ayato. i mean, you both have many duties, with your husband being the head of the kamisato clan, and you being his wife.

today, you both have your day off, but ayato still decides to do paperwork on his rest day, and his only break days comes in once a blue moon. youve been hinting at him, youve been sighing a little too loud and pointing out the lovely couples that come to the estate just to drop off MORE paperwork.

even after your attempts to try to let him know, he still doesnt get it! and now hes talking to an official so you cant even talk to him… youre sick and tired of how dense the head of the kamisato clan can be! it breaks your heart not being able to have some one on one time with your beloved.

you head to your shared bedroom, while walking there you see ayaka and thoma, “oh hello y/n,” says ayaka, “hello ayaka, hello thoma” you say, your tone being obviously depressed. “are you okay y/n?” thoma asks you with a worried face. “well… it’s been a while since ive been on a date with ayato and…” you look up to see ayaka giggling, “w-whats so funny?” youre a bit offended, youve just told the two about your troubles and now ayaka is giggling? “oh youll see,” thoma tells you before he walks away with ayaka.

what the fuck just happened. whats going on? maybe hes finally gonna take you out? “y/n?” you you jumped a bit at the sudden surprise, but you quickly regain your composure, “oh hi babe!” he puts a hand on your shoulder, “are you okay y/n? youve been acting strange all day, have i done something wrong?”

you feel guilty for making your beloved feel sad, “well, uhm… look ayato, it’s been ages since we been on a date together and i kinda feel like you forgot about…” you advert your eyes from his, he puts his fingers under your chin and lifts your head. "of course i didnt forget our anniversary, thats what i was planning all day, im sorry for not planning it earlier."

what.

oh shit, that was today? youve been so focused on going on a date with ayato that the thought of your anniversary was completely forgotten. ayato sees the slight panic in your eyes, "i dont need a gift, just being with you is the greatest present ive ever received." you feel a your shoulders relax but can still feel a tinge of guilt.

ayato presses a kiss on your temple and says "no matter if it's my day off or if im drowned in work, you will always come first my love."

A/N: all of my brain juices were out by the time i started writing this. very very cringe but i didnt know what to write ૮ ⸝⸝o̴̶̷᷄ ·̭ o̴̶̷̥᷅⸝⸝ ྀིა

@justaxiaosimp @mommykukki @xdrin @midnight-pluto @boomie-123 @scaramochies @dnsuhwr874y @hopefulceladon @yukinenikora @akusiapaakudimana @mai-yay @uhfhfhfhf @petitte-writer

#fluff #genshin impact x reader #genshin #genshin fluff #genshin impact #genshin x reader #pickle #ayato #kamisato ayato #ayato x reader #genshin ayato #ayato fluff #uglypickle #ugly-pickle

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whiskey-tango-matcha · 7 days

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Then & Now (M, cold)

Hiii, hope you like A LOT of hurt followed by 2-3 sentences of comfort lmao. This is Greyson fic - Grey is sick on a day he and Reed are supposed to have a date, and he's sure Reed is going to be angry with him because Trauma(TM). It's told in a flashback sort of format which I really enjoyed because I love writing blurbs of colds at different times in life lol. I hope you guys like it, please let me know what ya think, good, bad, or otherwise :)

CW: Male snz, cold, pneumonia mention, coughing, contagion mention, lots and lots of whump lmao. A little over 4K words under the cut.

Then & Now

Now

“Morning, Chef.”

“Huh-! HhITSZHH-ue!”

Elijah turned towards Greyson, who was doubled over into his hoodie sleeve, and gave him a sympathetic grimace. “Cooks finally pulled you under, hmm?”

“Ugh, like way fuckin’ under,” Greyson muttered, rubbing his eye and sucking in through his nose. “I feel like ass.”

“Sorry, dude,” Elijah said, tossing his counterpart a box of tissues. “Sucks.”

Greyson caught the box and pulled out a few just in time. “HITSZHZH-uhh!” This one, he managed to catch in the handful of tissues. He wiped his nose and shrugged. “Yeah,” he said, tossing the used tissues. “Mbostly because I was supposed to have a date tonight.”

Elijah smirked at his friend, who was pushing past the GM into their shared office. The two of them sat in unison. “Do you guys still call them dates? You’ve been official for, like, six months.”

“It’s our six-month anniversary,” Greyson said, his voice flattened by congestion. “We were going to do EMP.”

“Awww, now I’m depressed,” Elijah said. “Also, why didn’t you tell me earlier you were going to Eleven Madison? I still know people there.”

“So does Reed,” Greyson said, massaging his temple. “That’s why we were goigg. Fuck, mby fuckin’ head is pounding. Do we have any -?”

Elijah placed the ibuprofen in front of the chef before he could ask, along with a bottle of cough syrup and a decongestant. “You know we have it all,” he said, pushing an old cup of water across the desk for Greyson to swallow his arsenal of pills. “And fair enough. Well that fuckin’ sucks, dude, I’m sorry. Hey, at least you can leave early, right? Matt’s closing?”

“Yeah,” Greyson said, unwrapping a cough drop and popping it in his mouth. “I’ll head out once the rush is over. I still have to text Reee – hh...hhNTSHH-ue! HGTSHH-uhh!” Greyson doubled over, sneezed into his arm, and groaned. “I’mb gonna kill the guys when they get in,” he said, mostly to himself.

“Don’t do that,” Elijah said, placing a hand on Greyson’s shoulder on his way out of the office. “Then you’ll have to stay all night.”

Greyson huffed out a laugh and pulled out his phone. He clicked on his conversation with Reed, sighing. He did not want to have this conversation.

Greyson

9:31AM

hey babe. gonna have to cancel tonight, the cooks infected me w their plague :( im rly sorry.

The chef set his phone on the desk, prepared to either be ghosted or gaslit – two of Collin’s favorite pastimes whenever Greyson had had to cancel their plans during their relationship – and was shocked when the phone buzzed with a text almost immediately. He was almost afraid to look at his boyfriend’s response.

Reed

9:32AM

Oh, baby don’t be sorry!! what time are you off? I’ll pick you up and take you home :) we can do a sick day little date night instead!

Greyson stared at the phone, stunned. He couldn’t help it; he read the message again, then out loud said, “What the fuck?”

Then – Ten Years Ago

“Chef?”

The Executive Chef looked up from his paperwork at Greyson and sighed. “What is it, Abbott?”

“I, um – hh! HTSHH-uh! HGXTSH-ue! Snf. Umb, I just wanted to see if it was okay if I… left a little early today?” Greyson asked, his voice barely above a whisper. His chef raised his eyebrows and put his clipboard down. Oh, no, Greyson thought.

“Leave...early? And leave your clean up and prep to whom, exactly? Me?” The Executive Chef huffed out a laugh. “That’s rich, Abbott. Why the fuck would you need to leave early?”

“I…” Greyson started, but his voice gave out on the single syllable. He attempted to clear his throat. “I just… I really feel like shit? I was hoping I could, like… sleep it off, I guess. I mbean, I wouldn’t want to get anyone else sigck.” Greyson felt a cough bubbling to the surface; he tried to quell it, to no avail. The younger man collapsed into a coughing fit that felt like it lasted a lifetime.

The Chef remained unmoved. “My guys,” he said, placing a hand on his chest as Greyson attempted to compose himself, “don’t get sick, Abbott. And if they do, I don’t fucking hear about it. Understand? Because I really don’t give a shit. If you’re here, you’re here. If you decide to leave early,” he shrugged, uncaring, “then you leave for good. And Abbott, if you try to get a job after walking out of my kitchen, I promise you I will make it impossible. I know you’ve only been here a couple months, but here’s what you need to learn: put your head down and do your fucking job, and you can work anywhere in the world after this. Be a whiny piece of shit who tries to walk out on his shift, and you’ll be working at McDonald’s for the rest of you life. Got it?”

Greyson, too shocked to rebut, just bobbed his head up and down.

“Let me hear you say it,” the Chef said. Greyson cleared his throat.

“Yes, Chef,” he said. The Chef nodded.

“Now get the fuck out of my office.”

Now

“Elijah. Look at this text.”

The GM looked up slowly from the iPad where he was going over reservations for the evening. “...Why?” he asked, taking the phone from Greyson’s hand.

“Just look. Tell mbe that’s ndot weird,” Greyson said, crossing his arms over his chest. Elijah looked down, confused, and read the text. He pinched his eyebrows together just a little, and read it again. “See? Isn’t that weird?”

“Greyson…” Elijah said, handing the phone back. “That’s not weird.”

“Seriously?” Greyson asked, reading the text yet again. “It’s bizarre. He’s ndot even a little mad? C’mon. That’s weird.”

“He’s being sweet,” Elijah explained, slowly, as though he were talking to a toddler. “Did you want him to be mad? Because that’s bizarre.”

“Ndo I don’t want him to be mad. I jus – HTSZHH-ue! HRRSHH!” Greyson wrenched to the side to sneeze, which sent him into a fit of hacking coughs. “I just figured he’d want to, like, yell at mbe or something. For canceling,” Greyson finished, his voice strained against another cough. Elijah didn’t respond, not at first, and instead pressed a hand onto the chef’s forehead.

“I think you’re sicker than we thought, because you’re acting fucking delusional,” he said as Greyson slapped his hand away. “Greyson, normal people don’t yell at each other for getting sick, or having to cancel a plan. That’s, like, really twisted.”

Greyson rolled his eyes. “It’s ndot twisted, Lij you fuckin’ drama queen,” he said, then held up a finger. “Onesec – hh! Hh...hnn.” Greyson sniffled, a let out a little irritated cough. “Lost it.”

“Go back to the kitchen,” Elijah said, pointing towards the swinging doors. “Sit down. Rest. Let your medicine kick in. I don’t want people seeing this -” he gestured to Greyson, as if to allude to his entire being – “when they walk past the restaurant. Alright? Text your boyfriend something nice. Not something unhinged.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Greyson muttered, turning toward the kitchen, his phone still open to the conversation with Reed. He turned towards Elijah again before pushing through the kitchen doors. “I still say that this is the unhinged thing.”

“Go to therapy, Greyson,” Elijah said, not looking up from the iPad. Greyson rolled his eyes, pushed into the kitchen, and regarded his phone once again.

Greyson

10:07AM

thanks, babe. it’s ok, I can take care of myself. it wont be a long day, ill just grab some nyquil omw home and sleep it off. ill reschedule our rezo too, don’t worry about that. im really sorry again for canceling. if I could taste the food id still go lol.

Figuring that sounded at least relatively normal, Greyson hit send. He sat down at his desk once again and placed his head in his hands. No way he’s not pissed, Greyson thought, and he really believed it. In all his years of dating, he’d never met anyone who would respond that way; they’d at least have a snippy remark about the last-minute nature of the cancellation.

Greyson’s phone pinged once again, and he couldn’t help but grab it right away to assess the damage.

Reed

10:08AM

honey, please don’t apologize, seriously. youre sick, it happens, its no biggie :) I already moved the reservation to next week but if we need to ill move it again. james at emp said to tell you feel better btw.

Greyson blinked, dumbstruck. He started typing without thinking.

Greyson

10:10AM

you REALLY arent mad? seriously?

Reed

10:10AM

im really not mad. who gets mad at someone for being sick…? is someone at work mad at you? am I supposed to be mad..? lol

Greyson

10:11AM

I mean its a last minute cancellation. id understand if u were mad.

Reed

10:11AM

welllll….im not. is that ok? haha

Reed

10:15AM

grey…? you believe me, right?

Reed

10:21AM

greyson..?

Then – Seven Years Ago

He was moving through molasses.

Greyson placed a sluggish hand to his own forehead – you can’t check yourself for a fever, dumbass – and blinked painfully. He’d made it to work, he’d made it through the day, and he’d made it back home, against all odds. Now, he was stuck on his couch, unable to even crawl to the bathroom for a thermometer.

It had all compounded on him, was his guess. The endless fourteen hour days for the better part of two years at his thankless sous chef job. The shitty Chicago-suburbs apartment with no heat, where he froze for the few hours a week he slept. The near-constant drinking. Sure, he was only twenty-five, but what was it they said about this industry? It ages you in dog years. Yeah, that was it.

“Hh-! Hh...ITSZHH-ue! HTSHHH-ue!” Greyson sneezed helplessly into the blanket he’d wrapped around himself, and groaned. This was not what he’d imagined when he moved here from Minnesota. He’d thought it would be glamorous, working as a sous chef at a high-end hotel in a big city. He thought he’d have friends, or a girlfriend, or something. Instead, he was trapped on his couch, benched by a sinus infection and seasonal depression that seemed to last the whole year round. Fuck this, Greyson thought. He couldn’t get off the couch, but he could reach his phone; Greyson pulled up Indeed and changed his search parameters.

Actively searching for work. Location: Any.

Now

“Um… Chef? What’s, uh… what’s going on?”

Greyson paused for a moment, a crate of spoiled food held on his shoulder. He turned towards Matt, keen to answer, but instead held the crate tighter and wrenched to the side. “HRTTSHH-uh!”

“Bless you,” Matt said, an automatic reaction. Greyson nodded, turned towards the dumpster, and dumped the food in before beginning the cycle anew: pick up crate. Turn to sneeze. Dump old food. Matt wasn’t sure if he should help his boss, or go inside for backup.

He chose the former, picking a crate filled to the brim with rotten tomatoes off the ground and hoisting it into the trash. “You gonna tell me what’s up?” he asked as the two of them continued gathering and tossing.

Greyson sighed, pulled a hand down his face, and shook his head. “I thingk Reed and I are over,” he said, voice soft and throaty. Matt’s eyebrows shot up.

“What? Seriously? What did you do?” Matt asked, prompting a stuffy laugh from his boss.

“I just don’t thingk it’s going to work,” Greyson said, shrugging. “I… I don’t want to, like, play gambes. I can’t do that again, ndot after Collin.”

“Chef,” Matt said as he gathered and tossed the last milk crate, “what are you talking about? Reed is, like, the most straight-shooting guy I’ve ever met. How is he playing games?”

Greyson, left without anything to occupy his hands, just shrugged and pulled out his phone. He handed it to Matt without explanation, and the sous quickly read through the text conversation Greyson and Reed had going. Matt furrowed his brow.

“I don’t get it,” he said, handing the phone back. “He wants to take care of you, what’s the problem with that?”

“He doesn’t want to take care of me, he wants to have the upper hand,” Greyson explained, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and sitting on the step just outside the back door. “Want one?”

“Sure,” Matt said, sitting beside his boss. “I mean, you shouldn’t be smoking if you’re -”

“HTSHH! Hh-! ITZSHH-ue!” Greyson turned into his elbow, taking a long moment to gather himself before handing Matt his cigarette.

“-sick,” Matt finished. The older man shrugged, and Matt plucked the lighter out of Greyson’s hand to light both of them up, not daring to push his boss any closer to the edge. For a moment, they smoked in silence, only Greyson’s sniffles and coughs interrupting the quiet.

“Boss,” Matt said, finally, “I think you need to talk to Reed.”

“I did,” Greyson said, stubbing out his cigarette. “You saw.”

“No, I mean actually talk to him,” Matt said. The two of them stood, looking at each other – a face-off without the malice. Matt continued. “Not ignore his texts and clean out the walk-in.”

Greyson scoffed. “Matt, just because you have sombe fairy-tale love story doesn’t mbean everyone else does, too. Okay? If it’s over between me and Reed, it’s fine. I’mb better off alone, anywaa – hh! Hh… Hhhii-!” Greyson stood with his elbow poised at his face, stuck in pre-sneeze agony for what seemed like an eternity. While he was incapacitated, Matt took his phone and typed out a message that his boss couldn’t see. Finally, Greyson lowered his arm and sucked in, fruitlessly, through his nose. “The fugck are you doigg?” he asked, snatching his phone back from his sous.

“If you’re not going to talk to Reed,” Matt shrugged, unapologetic, “I will.”

Greyson looked down at his phone, which buzzed twice in his hand. Reed’s face popped up on the screen. Call from: reed <3

Then – Three Years Ago

“HTSHH! Huh! ETZSHH-ue! HRTTSHH-ue!”

“Bless, bless, bless you. Allergies?” Collin asked, not looking up from his phone. Greyson sniffled in vain, and coughed painfully.

“Ndot exactly,” he croaked from the doorway to Collin’s living room. “Baby, do you thingk you could drive mbe to urdent care, actually?”

Collin looked up and slowly raised an eyebrow. “For what?” he asked, obviously annoyed. Greyson swallowed as best he could and placed a hand on his throat.

“I thingk… I mbight have strep. Or bronchitis, or sombething. I, uh… I’ve had a fever for like. A week.” Greyson had to stop to close his eyes and grab onto the door frame, a sordid attempt to keep from hitting the floor like a rotten sack of potatoes. Collin rolled his eyes.

“You’re such a drama queen. You seemed fine when you came over last night.”

“You were asleep whend I came over,” Greyson said, his eyes still closed. “Did you ndot notice that I haven’t been over in like five days?”

Collin shrugged. “I mean, yeah, but I figured you were busy with work. You’re always busy with work,” he said, the venom in his voice making clear that he wanted to fight.

Greyson, physically incapable of fighting at that moment, just slid slowly to the ground and nodded. “Yeah. You’re right,” he said. “Ndow I’m paying the price. Please, baby. Can you please just take me? I… I really don’t feel well.”

It was pathetic. He knew it, but he couldn’t stop himself; he was fairly sure he was moments from passing out. Collin turned and made himself comfier on the couch.

“I’ll call you an uber,” he said, pressing some buttons on his phone. “You barely make time for me, and now you’re asking me to be your chauffeur? Please, Greyson.” He showed his ailing boyfriend the phone. “He’ll be out front in five minutes. Better make your way down.”

“Okay,” Greyson said, pulling himself slowly to his feet. “Thangk you.”

Collin didn’t say a word as Greyson let himself out of the apartment. He made it downstairs, and into the uber, and into the waiting room at urgent care. He made it out by himself, too, with a laundry list of prognoses – strep, sinus infection, walking pneumonia – and a handful of prescriptions. When he texted Collin later to fill him in, his boyfriend didn’t text back.

Greyson fell asleep on his shower floor and awoke to freezing water pounding on him, and a courier pounding on his door. When he toweled off and answered it, chicken soup from the local bodega and a note that read feel better -c sat at his feet. Greyson breathed a sigh of relief; at least he had been forgiven.

Now

Reed had dated plenty of men is his thirty-five years of life, and had found that there were two general categories when it came to sick men: there was the Baby, and there was the Don’t Look at Me.

Greyson though, an enigma since the moment they met, seemed to fall into a third category, a category that was, to Reed, yet undiscovered: the You Hate Me.

Reed was good with the first two categories; the Don’t Look at Me, you left medicine outside their room and texted them funny memes. The Baby, you laid in bed with them and spoon-fed them soup. Easy. Understandable. Truthfully, this was one of his favorite things about men: they were easy to crack. He figured Greyson would likely fall into the Baby category, which was fine by him – there was nothing he’d like more than to look after an ailing Greyson, to be honest. This third category he seemed to embody, though, was not something Reed knew what to do with.

“He didn’t answer when I called him,” Reed said into the phone receiver. “I just want to know what’s going on, I mean, did I say something wrong?”

On the other end of the line, Elijah sighed. “No, you didn’t do anything wrong. This is just… it’s just Greyson being Greyson.”

Reed wasn’t about to take this lying down. “Hey, are you guys super busy tonight? I mean, I don’t want to be that boyfriend, but, like, can I come get him? We really need to talk, and if what Matt said is true he probably shouldn’t be, like, working anyway, right?”

While Elijah paused, Reed pulled the phone away from his ear and once again re-read the text Matt had sent from Greyson’s phone: hey reed, it’s matt. grey is sick as hell, so DO NOT take any of the crazy weird shit he says seriously, k? his temperature needs to lower by like 5 degrees before you do this, but u guys need to actually talk. he’s being stupid.

“Please,” Reed heard Elijah’s tinny voice on the other end and put the phone back to his ear. “Please, come and collect him. I’m begging.”

Reed stood from the couch and grabbed his keys. “Give me twenty minutes. I’m on my way.”

Then – Two Years Ago

“Heyyy, baby, cand I buy you a dringk?”

The girl leaned back, her face marked by disgust. “No, thanks. Save your money and get yourself some NyQuil,” she said, disappearing into the crowd. Greyson huffed out a sigh and coughed into his hand – a long, crackling sound that made the other bar patrons inch their chairs away.

“She’s right, you know,” the bartender – Skip, Greyson had learned his name was a few weeks back when he had started coming in every night – said, filling Greyson’s shot glass yet again. “You need to go home.”

“And yet you pour mbe another drink,” Greyson said, knocking back the shot. “The duality of mban. NGTXSH! HTSHH! Huh-! HRRSHH-ue!” Greyson covered his mouth lazily with one hand, wiped it on his pants, hand held the glass up to indicate ‘another’.

“Bless you,” Skip said, not pouring the shot. “Greyson, seriously: go home. You sound fucking awful.”

“Are you cutting mbe off?” Greyson asked, his rheumy eyes meeting Skip’s over the bartop. “Because unless you are, I’mb staying.” He coughed again, into his elbow; the cough was quickly becoming a problem. He’d had a cold two weeks ago; the symptoms had been mild, but the cough had hung around. When he caught whatever-the-fuck this was two days ago, the cough had turned from an annoyance to a pressing issue; he should go home. He should go to the doctor, he should take a day off, he should, he should, he should.

But he wouldn’t. He would stay, and he would drink until he was kicked out, then he’d pass out on the train and not make it home to sleep. He’d go to work at seven AM and stay until midnight and do it all again.

“I’m not kicking you out,” Skip sighed. “I’m just saying… you should take care of yourself.”

Greyson blinked slowly. He could feel his lungs, heavy with fluid, gearing up to cough again; his head, pounding in spite or because of the alcohol; his heart crushed into a million, Collin-sized pieces. Take care of yourself. It felt impossible, when you’d never been shown how.

“This is mbe taking care of myself,” he said, clearing his throat. “I’ll have another.”

Now

Greyson rested his head on a case of lettuce in the corner of the walk-in. He knew he should be continuing his madness of cleaning, but he’d accidentally sat down on his fifth trip into the refrigerator, and now he wasn’t sure he’d be able to get up again.

Fucking Reed, Greyson thought as he allowed the cold salad box to sate the fever he had burning in his brain. Why can’t he just be up front with me? If you’re mad just say it, don’t fucking torture me.

Perhaps deep down, he knew he was being ridiculous; Matt and Elijah were most likely correct. The simplest answer – that Reed truly was just a good guy – was probably the right one. But he just couldn’t get out of his mind all the times he’d reached out, needed help and asked for it, and been shot down. He certainly couldn’t allow himself to believe that the person he was dating was truly good; he knew he’d never deserve that.

“Greyson?”

Speaking of Reed, that sounded a lot like him – was Greyson hearing things? Had he, in his fever-addled state, conjured a hallucination of his boyfriend to have a fight with? Bizarre, Grey, he thought to himself. That’s really fucking bizarre.

“Grey? Elijah said you were in here but I don’t – oh!”

Either this was a really crazy hallucination, or that really was Reed standing over him, in the walk-in. Greyson blinked hard, then blinked again, and suddenly Reed was on the ground next to him.

“Babe...it’s really cold in here. Do you think we can, um, leave?”

Greyson furrowed his eyebrows together. “Leave… and go where?” he asked, his voice cracking. “I have to… work. What are you doigg heeee...HRTSHH-ue! Huh -! HTSHH! NTSHH! IGXTSH!” Greyson attempted to stifle over and over, until Reed gently took his hand and pulled it away from his face.

“That has to hurt,” Reed said, his voice quiet and calm. “You can just… sneeze, you know. Like, regular.”

“Tryigg ndot to get you,” Greyson croaked, his eyes glazing over once again. “Youbettermov – HRRETSZCHH-ue! ITSZZHH-ue! Fuck – NGTSHHZ-ue!” Greyson sneezed into his lap, then coughed until his lungs felt sore. Reed didn’t move; he came closer and rubbed Greyson’s back.

“Bless you, baby,” Reed said, eventually.

“Thangks. Sorry,” Greyson murmured, pushing his hair out of his face and turning to look at Reed. “Why are you here?” he asked, levity out the window.

Reed let out a little laugh. “Umm, why do you think?” he asked. “You’ve been ignoring me since this morning. I got worried, since Matt said you were super sick – no lie detected, by the way, you sound truly awful –”

“Sorry,” Greyson said again, wiping under his nose. “I kndow, it’s gross.”

“Please, Grey,” Reed said, taking both sides of his boyfriend’s face in his hands and looking him in the eye. “Please. Stop apologizing. It’s okay to be sick. I don’t understand why you think I’m angry at you. I’m not.”

Greyson swallowed, painfully, and gave a little nod. “Okay,” he said, finally.

“Okay,” Reed repeated. “Anyway. I called Elijah. He said to come and collect you.”

At this, Greyson couldn’t help but cough out a laugh. “Collect mbe?” he asked. Reed smiled a little.

“Yeah,” he said. “His words, not mine.”

They both laughed, softly at first, then ramping up to near-hysteria. They only stopped when Greyson started coughing again and couldn’t seem to stop.

“Let’s go get you some water,” Reed said, helping his boyfriend to his shaky feet. Greyson allowed himself to be pulled out of the walk-in, and given a bottle of water that was sitting on his prep station. Greyson drank until the fit subsided, then regarded Reed once again.

“So… you really aren’t mbad?” he asked, rubbing his goosebumped arms up and down. Reed shook his head and shrugged off his windbreaker. He draped it over Greyson’s shoulders.

“I’m really not mad,” he insisted. Greyson nodded, seemingly satiated. Reed sighed through his nose and slipped his arms around the chef.

“Life’s done a number on you, huh?” he asked, quietly enough that it could’ve just been to himself. Greyson huffed out a sad little laugh.

“Like you wouldn’t believe, baby,” he murmured, pressing his hot head into Reed’s hair. “Like you wouldn’t believe.”

#whiskeyswriting #snz #sickfic #snzfic #coldfic #snzblr #snez #male cold #male snz #this was a fun one!#whump #h/c #but mostly hurt lol #i know it's a lot of dialogue. my apologies i just love to write dialogue and HATE to write exposition lol #which is Not Good Writing but whatever #this is my horn snz blog not my doctoral thesis lmao

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stylesispunk · 5 months

Text

"I couldn't want you anymore" | part 9

Artist!Joel Miller x florist!reader

series masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

summary: when Sarah's mom comes back into Joel's life to fight for their past relationship, Joel needs to convince her he is in a happy relationship with the florist next to his gallery in order to make her go away. The problem is, that he and the florist can't stand each other's guts or that it's what he thinks.

warning: time jump, age gap (8 years), remember bee is reader's nickname, reader overthinks a lot in this one, unnecessary angst(because sad me, sad writing) fluff.

a/n: Okay, chapter 9 is here! The last chapter flopped so bad, so I hope you like this one because is more than 7k words, so give it love, please. It's kinda sad when there's no feedback at all. Reblogs and comments are appreciated. The next chapter may be the last one. Happy reading.

masterlist

One year later,

You and Joel have been dating for a year and have lived together for two weeks. You've enjoyed a lovely year together. Cooking together in the kitchen, quiet Sunday mornings with breakfast in bed, and the simple delight of coming home to one another after a long day had become treasured in both of your routines.

You couldn’t lie. You wouldn’t imagine this thing happening. Five years ago, you and Joel couldn’t even spend a minute together without wanting to murder each other, and now you were so in love that both of your hearts could burst into flames.

And today, on your first anniversary as an official couple, the day had started wonderfully okay. Joel surprised you with a beautifully arranged bouquet he made himself with flowers from your shop, a delicious breakfast in bed for you, and a promise of a dinner at night in a restaurant he had reserved for you to enjoy a romantic dinner.

He left a little earlier than you this morning since he needed to finalize some negotiations with some prominent and important painters who wanted to exhibit their work in his gallery. You were proud of him, so you didn't reach for him as much as you normally did because this day was also significant to him. So, you went about your business as normal, selling flowers and delivering a wonderful cup of tea or coffee to passers-by, occasionally stealing glances at the gallery, hoping everything was going well for Joel.

So as the evening started to envelop the clear sky, and you were closing the door of your shop, you noticed Joel’s truck was missing. You thought he had maybe gone home before you to get ready, but as soon as you arrived there, he wasn’t there. You called him, but the calls weren’t answered, and the messages neither. Still, not thinking negatively, you went upstairs to get ready.

You choose a black silky fabric flowing elegantly around you that you bought just a few days ago for this night. Despite the excitement of the evening, a flicker of concern about Joel's absence lingered in the back of your mind. You dismissed it, attributing it to the busyness of the day. As you applied a touch of makeup and styled your hair before heading to the restaurant, perhaps he was already there waiting for you.

But as night arrived, you were alone in a restaurant where you were both supposed to have dinner to celebrate your anniversary, and he hadn’t shown up.

The restaurant's ambient lighting cast a soft glow on the empty chair across from you. The anniversary celebration that started with a beautifully arranged bouquet of flowers had taken an unexpected turn as the minutes ticked by, and Joel was nowhere to be seen. The anniversary celebration, which had begun with a beautifully arranged bouquet of flowers, had taken an unexpected turn as the minutes passed, and Joel was nowhere to be seen.

Doubt crept into your mind, and you found yourself checking your phone for any missed messages or calls. The disappointment grew with each passing moment, and you couldn't shake the feeling of being stood up on a day meant for celebration.

The waiter approached with a sympathetic smile. "Is everything alright, miss? Would you like to order or perhaps wait a bit longer?"

You sighed, your faint smile masking your disappointment. "I'll give it a bit more time, thank you."

The restaurant's vibrant ambiance became a backdrop to the quiet anguish within as you waited. Your mind raced with questions: was there an emergency? Has he forgotten? You tried calling Joel, but his phone went directly to voicemail.

The minutes felt like hours, and the celebration, which was supposed to be full of joy and shared memories, became a lonely wait at a table set for two.

You eventually opted to leave, with the burden of disappointment weighing heavily on your shoulders. As you paid for the untouched dinner, the server showed real concern, giving gentle words of comfort.

The city lights seemed to blend as you stepped out into the night, through a mix of crystal tears and unresolved questions.

You paused at the door when you arrived home, unsure of what to expect.

You looked at your phone, expecting a message or call with an explanation. Nothing. When you entered the house, the lights were still turned off, so you walked to your shared bedroom, but Joel was not there. You took off your clothing, grabbed your pajamas, and walked to the bathroom to remove your make-up and go to bed. Just as you were finishing, the sound of a close downstairs interrupted your thoughts.

Joel entered the bedroom and smiled at you, visibly drunk.

The air in the room shifted with relief, guilt, and possibly a hint of defiance from your side as he took in your gaze. Joel stumbled slightly as he approached you.

"Love” he slurred; his words not entirely coherent. "I'm sorry. Lost track of time”

Your disappointment transformed into hurt and frustration, and a growing concern for the person before you. The scent of alcohol clung to him, and the Joel you had known, thoughtful and present, seemed distant.

"Why didn't you call?" you gently asked, yet your voice was cold as ice.

He attempted a nonchalant shrug, but it was unsteady. "Phone died. It's just a celebration, Bee. We can have another one."

As you looked at him, all the beautiful moments of the past year felt overshadowed by this moment.

You took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. "Just a celebration?” you asked, clearly hurt. “You understand that we hated each other's guts for years and now we’re together, even living together.”

“Those artists want to display their work on my galley, Bee. I wanted to celebrate because it is important to me.”

“And I’m not?” you asked, feeling small. “Am I not important to you?”

Joel's unsteady behavior appeared to grow worse as your questions hung in the air. Your words sunk into the silence, generating a noticeable tension.

"No, Bee, that's not what I meant," he mumbled "Of course, you're important. It's only... This offer surprised me, and I got carried away. "I made a mistake."

Your heart ached at the disparity between your expectations and the reality of the situation. The celebration you had envisioned, a symbol of your shared journey, now lay in fragments.

"But why didn't you communicate?" you pressed; your voice filled with hurt. "A simple call, a message. I was waiting, Joel. I was excited about tonight."

He ran a hand through his hair, a gesture that usually conveyed frustration, but now it seemed tinged with remorse. "I know, Bee. I messed up big time. I'm sorry."

The distance between your expectations and the reality of the situation crushed your heart.

"But why didn't you tell me?" you pressed, your voice tense. "A simple phone call, a message. Joel, I was waiting for you. I was looking forward to tonight."

He ran his fingers through his hair, a usually impatient behavior that now appeared tinged with guilt. "I understand, Bee. I made a huge mistake. I apologize."

You didn’t say a word. He knew it was better to have you shouting at him than giving him this cold silence. If he had only told you about it before acting so careless about your feelings. If only he weren’t the person who always messed up with your heart.

“Where are you going?” he asked, as you grabbed your pillow.

You turned to face Joel; pain still fresh in your eyes. "I don’t want to sleep next to you tonight.”

“Can we talk in the morning?” He quietly asked.

The weight of unspoken words and not resolved emotions weighed heavily on the silence that followed. You shut the guest room door behind you, leaving Joel alone in the quiet bedroom.

When he woke up the next morning, the first thing he noticed was the absence of your warmth next to him, and his heart hurt because of how thoughtless he had been the night before. His head was killing him, and when he eventually opened his eyes, he found a glass of water and a pill next to him, along with a message:

"Take them, so your stupid head doesn't hurt anymore."

He grinned, knowing that even when you were upset with him, you still found a way to take care of him.

After some time, he was freshened up and dressed. He made his way downstairs, finding Sarah pouring a glass of orange juice,

“Good morning Dad,” she said.

“Morning baby girl”, he kissed her temple. “Where’s Bee?”

“She left earlier. She left breakfast done for us though, especially for you” she said, signaling at the pancakes and orange juice on the table.

“What did she say?”

She grabbed the piece of paper with the note you had left for Joel about his breakfast.

Sarah handed the note to Joel, and he read your words:

“Breakfast is ready for you, even if you're a big dummy sometimes. Make sure to eat. We can talk later.

-Bee"

Joel sighed, realizing the gravity of his actions. The note reflected a mix of care and disappointment, a sentiment he knew he had to address.

"Thanks, Sarah," he said, genuinely grateful for the effort you had made even when upset. "I'll talk to Bee later."

“So, what did you do?” she asked,

Joel hesitated for a moment, choosing his words carefully. "I made a mistake, Sarah. I let something else take priority over what really matters. It wasn't fair to Bee.”

Sarah's expression was a mix of interest and concern. "Is Bee mad at you?"

Joel gave a sad nod. "She is, indeed. She has every right to be so. "I ruined our celebration and hurt her feelings."

Sarah crossed her arms, thinking about her father's behavior. "What are you going to do about it?"

Joel groaned, with an enthusiastic look in his eyes. "I'm going to apologize and make amends." I care deeply about Bee, and I don't want to mess things up."

Sarah smiled encouragingly at him. "Have you noticed she seems more sensitive these days?"

Joel rubbed his brow as he considered Sarah's observation. "Do you think so?" "Why did you say that?"

Sarah shook her head. "I'm not sure, just an observation. Perhaps it's because you and she are becoming more serious, and she is becoming more invested in everything."

Joel nodded "You could be right. That is something I need to be more aware of. Thank you for bringing it to my attention, kid."

"Oh," she remembered, "she was throwing up in the morning, maybe she is sick?"

Sarah let out a sigh. "I'm not sure, Dad. Maybe she didn't want to bother you after last night."

Joel's expression was a mix of concern and sadness. "I messed up big time."

Sarah stroked his shoulder. "Go talk to her, Dad." Make everything right. And perhaps you could bring her some soup or something. Isn't that what you do when someone is sick?

Joel laughed. "Right. Thank you so much, darling. "I'll take care of it." With renewed enthusiasm, he set out to find you and talk.

Sarah continued, encouraged by her father's acknowledgment, "Just make sure she knows you're sorry and that you care about her." You can't afford to make a mistake here, Dad."

Joel chuckled at his daughter's insight. "You are completely correct. I'll do all in my power to set things right." He then excused himself to find you and deal with the mess he had made.

Joel returned Sarah's smile, acknowledging her perspective. "I am, kid. More than I ever imagined I could be."

Once he arrived at the gallery, he got out of the car. The first thing he did was look at your flower shop. And there were you, outside, laughing at something an old lady was telling you while you were serving her some tea at one of the tables you had outside of the flower shop.

As you were there, he couldn’t help but think how lucky he was you that loved him. You were effortless, beautiful and a kind soul he sometimes thought he didn’t deserve.

Joel took a moment to observe you from a distance, a small smile playing on his lips as he watched the interaction between you and the old lady. He felt a mixture of warmth and gratitude, knowing that you were a significant part of his life.

He approached the flower shop, gathering his bravery. You looked up from serving tea as he cleared his throat, your gaze catching his.

You smiled politely, but your eyes were a little unsure.

"Who is this handsome man?" the old lady asked, seeing you two connect.

Joel laughed, enjoying the playful interruption. "My name is Joel. I'm her boyfriend," he said, hoping his introduction wasn't too bold.

The elderly lady's eyes twinkled with delight. "Well, Joel, aren't you a lucky man? This lady has a golden heart."

The compliment made you blush, and you were happy for the distraction. "Oh, Mary, please stop. This is Mary, a regular customer and close friend."

Joel returned his gorgeous smile as he offered a hand to Mary. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mary." Bee frequently mentions you."

Mary placed his hand in hers, shaking it firmly. "Oh, she does? So, young man, you'd better take good care of her."

Joel nodded; his gaze fixed on yours. "I plan to."

Joel returned his attention to you as Mary excused herself. "Can we talk, Bee?"

You appeared conflicted for a moment, then you relented and guided him into the shop.

The aroma of fresh flowers enveloped both of you once you entered. Although the tone was light, there remained an undercurrent of unresolved anxiety. You stepped behind the counter, raising an eyebrow at Joel.

"What kind of flowers are we looking for today, sir?" you asked politely.

Joel grinned, appreciating your willingness to play along. "I'm thinking about something bright that says 'I'm sorry for being an idiot'?"

You chuckled, grabbing a mix of vibrant blooms. "Ah, the classic apology bouquet. Popular choice."

Joel leaned on the counter, watching you work. "So, Bee, about last night..."

You interrupted, holding up a finger. "Let me finish this one, and then we can talk. You're not off the hook just yet."

He nodded, a playful glint in his eyes. "I'm at your mercy, flower queen.”

Once the bouquet was ready, you handed it to Joel. "There you go, the 'I'm Sorry' special. Now, talk."

Joel took the bouquet, his eyes softening. "I messed up, Bee. I should have prioritized you over the gallery celebration. I'm truly sorry."

You sighed, leaning against the counter. “It’s not about that. You could have told me, but instead you treated our anniversary as nothing important to you.”

Joel's expression turned more earnest as he listened to your words. "Bee, you're right. I should have communicated better. I didn't mean to make you feel unimportant. Our anniversary means everything to me."

You looked at him, the frustration giving way to a softer understanding. "I just want us to be on the same page, Joel. We're in this together."

He nodded, his eyes shining with sincerity. "I understand, and I apologize for my error." I promise I'll make it up to you."

You cracked a little smile at him. "Actions, Joel, speak louder than words. Remember? I know that living together is something different now, and maybe you felt a little stifled by my presence at –

"Don't you ever say that again," he interjected seriously. The increased passion in Joel's voice surprised you. His eyes pierced into yours. "I don't feel suffocated, Bee. Not even for a second. It's what I want to have you here, sharing our lives. It's something I've always wanted."

His sincerity resonated, and you felt a warmth spreading in your chest. You nodded, the unspoken understanding settling between you two. "Okay, Joel. I believe you."

He reached for your hand; his grip gentle yet reassuring. "I love you, Bee. And I don't want you to ever doubt that."

A soft smile played on your lips.

“Come here” he said.

You walked around the counter to be close to him and allowed him to put his arms around your middle, you kissed his neck.

“Sarah told me you threw up this morning, are you sick?” he questioned, worried.

You sighed, feeling the warmth of Joel's embrace. "I think it's just a stomach bug or something. It happens."

He tightened his grip on you, concern evident in his voice. "Have you seen a doctor?"

"Not yet," you admitted, "but I'll schedule an appointment if it persists."

Joel's fingers traced comforting circles on your back. "Take care of yourself, Bee. I hate seeing you unwell."

You chuckled; the vibration felt against his chest. "I'm a tough. A little bug won't bring me down."

He kissed the top of your head. "Still, let me know if you need anything. And about last night..."

You looked up at him, and he continued, "I'll make it up to you, Bee. I promise."

You nodded, feeling grateful for his understanding. "I know you will, Joel."

A few days later, Joel kept true to his promise. He had planned a surprise meal for you at a nice restaurant, and he led you inside with a slight smile on his lips. The atmosphere was cozy, with soft lighting and a bouquet of your favorite flowers on the table.

As you settled into your seats, Joel took a moment to gaze at you, admiration evident in his eyes. "I've been thinking a lot about us," he began, sincerity lacing his words. "I know I messed up our celebration, and I want to make it up to you."

"It's okay," you murmured as you took his hands in yours as you smiled at him.

Joel had chosen a dimly lit restaurant for your date, with a pleasant setting that set the tone for a romantic evening. You and Joel shared a lovely supper while telling stories and laughing. You couldn't help but feel a sense of warmth and connection as the night proceeded.

Joel made every effort to remain attentive throughout the meal, engaging in significant conversations and making you feel appreciated. You felt a wave of nausea as dessert arrived. Excusing yourself, you dashed to the restroom, hoping to alleviate the bad feeling.

While you were gone, Joel recognized one of the artists he had celebrated with the night before. She was seated at the bar when she noticed Joel and decided to start a conversation.

The artist, an attractive and confident woman, started to flirt with Joel. He tried to keep the talk light and professional, but the girl appeared determined to inject a little humor into their conversation. You came from the restroom just in time to see their conversation, unnoticed by Joel.

As you approached, you noticed the exchange between Joel and the artist. Your brows furrowed, and a tinge of jealousy crept into your heart.

“Excuse me” you interrupted as the woman caressed Joel’s arm, “What’s happening here?”

Joel turned, a slightly surprised expression on his face as he saw you standing there. The artist, still oblivious to Joel's relationship status, greeted you with a friendly smile.

"Oh, hi there! she said, extending a hand. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize Joel was here with someone."

You shook her hand, trying to maintain composure. "Hi. Who are you?"

"I'm Michelle, one of the artists from the gallery," she replied. "Joel and I were just chatting about some upcoming exhibitions.” She smiled at you through her teeth, not happy about the interruption. “Who are you?”

You glanced at Joel, who seemed to sense the tension. “His girlfriend” you said, simply.

The woman seemed speechless for a moment. “I didn’t know he had a girlfriend” she said.

“Well, you know now.”

“How long have you both been dating?” she asked, mostly to Joel.

“A year” he said, proudly, smiling at you.

“It’s not a long time” she said.

You raised an eyebrow, unamused by her comment.

"It's long enough for us." Joel said.

“And- “

“Oh my god, if you have so many questions why don’t you sit with Joel and talk” you spoke “I’m going home” you said, already walking out of the restaurant.

Joel hastily followed you out of the restaurant, catching up with you just as you reached the sidewalk. He grabbed your arm gently, turning you to face him.

"Bee, wait. I'm sorry about that. I had no idea she'd do that."

You sighed, looking into his sincere eyes. "I know you didn't invite that. It's just frustrating sometimes."

"I get it," Joel said, running a hand through his hair. "But you didn’t have to act like a child, bee. She is a really prestigious and important artist for the gallery”, he added, acting angrily.

You felt a twinge of frustration at Joel's comment. "I'm not acting like a child, Joel. I just didn't expect to see you being flirted with so blatantly, especially on our anniversary celebration. It caught me off guard."

"Let's just go home and forget about this, okay?"

“No” he said, grabbing you from your wrist, taking you off guard. “You have been overreacting lately, what’s happening to you?”

You winced at his sudden grip on your wrist, the unexpected force surprising you. Joel's frustration was evident, and you could feel the tension building.

"I'm not overreacting," you said, your voice steady but trembling with your own frustration. "I just didn't like seeing you getting flirted like that. Maybe I didn't handle it perfectly, but it bothered me."

Joel released his grip, "Bee, I just want you to trust me. Nothing happened, and I wouldn't let anything happen. You don't need to get defensive."

You took a step back, rubbing your arm where he had held you. "I trust you, Joel. It's not about that. It's just... I don't know. Maybe I'm more sensitive lately."

“Why?” he continued.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, okay?” you sobbed, ashamed of yourself. “Can we just go home?”

Joel nodded, realizing that pressing the issue any further might not be the best decision. He unlocked the car door for you, and you both climbed inside for the ride home. The mood inside the car was tense, due to a mix of unresolved stress and an equal need to move on from recent events.

However, during the drive, you started feeling a bit dizzy. The events of the evening, the unexpected encounter, and the rush of emotions seemed to take a toll on you. You leaned back in the seat, closing your eyes to quell the uneasiness.

Joel noticed your discomfort and became concerned. "Bee, are you okay? You seem a bit off."

You took a deep breath, trying to shake off the dizziness. "I think it's just everything catching up with me. I'll be fine."

But as the car continued its journey home, the dizziness persisted, and you couldn't shake the feeling that something more than just the events of the evening was affecting you.

Joel's worry deepened, and he reached over to gently place a hand on your shoulder. "Maybe we should stop by the hospital, just to be sure."

You shook your head, attempting to muster a reassuring smile. "It's probably just fatigue. I'll rest when we get home."

However, Joel wasn't convinced. As you pulled into the driveway, he helped you out of the car, supporting you as you walked into the house. The uneasiness lingered, prompting Joel to insist on seeking medical advice.

"Let's at least call a doctor, Bee," he suggested, his concern etched across his face. "I want to make sure you're okay."

“I’ll go tomorrow,” you said.

Joel nodded hesitantly, knowing your hesitation. He led you to the couch and urged you to rest while he went to get a drink of water. The room appeared to spin as you sat there, and the unease in your gut continued.

When Joel returned, he handed you the water with concern in his eyes. "I know you're tough, but this isn't normal, Bee." Please have you checked out by a doctor tonight."

You took a sip of water while you pondered his statements. The dizziness and discomfort were fading away.

"I told you I'll go tomorrow. I'm better," you said with a faint smile.

"Okay"

After a few hours, in the middle of the night, Joel woke up to your absence beside him in bed. Instant worry creeped up in his body. Where would you be at this time of the night? He made his way downstairs, finding the little dim light of the kitchen on with no sign of you.

Joel's worried expression transformed into a mixture of relief and amusement as he saw you on the kitchen floor, eating ice-cream.

"Love, what are you doing down here?" he asked, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Caught in the act, you looked up at him, your eyes wide with surprise. A moment of silence passed before you burst into laughter, the sound echoing through the quiet kitchen.

"I couldn't sleep, and I was craving something sweet," you explained between giggles.

Joel chuckled, joining you on the floor. "In the middle of the night? You're a true midnight snacker, aren't you?"

You nodded, still laughing. "Guilty as charged." You smiled at him again. “I didn’t get to finish my dessert at the restaurant.”

He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a warm embrace. "You never cease to surprise me, my love."

With a playful grin, you held up the ice cream container. "Want to join me?"

Joel shook his head, feigning seriousness. "I'll pass. It's past my bedtime, you know."

“Are you going back to bed?”

Joel nodded, his playful smile lingering. "Yeah, I should. But if you're going to stay up, I might make an exception."

You laughed, shaking your head. "No, go back to sleep. I'll join you in a bit."

He pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead. "Alright, but don't stay up too late. I'll be waiting for you."

As Joel headed back to bed, you enjoyed the solitude of the quiet kitchen, savoring the ice cream. You didn’t know why you have been craving sweet snacks so much lately.

After a while, you decided to join Joel in bed, carrying the warmth of the content feeling you had after enjoying the midnight snack. The soft glow of the moonlight seeped through the curtains as you quietly entered the bedroom, finding Joel peacefully asleep.

Slipping under the covers, you cuddled up beside him, savoring the warmth and familiarity of his presence. As you closed your eyes, you fell asleep into the peaceful dream you have had in a long time.

In the following days, your unease persisted, prompting you to make an appointment with the doctor, as Joel had suggested. The clinic was calm, with the soft hum of medical equipment in the background. The scent of antiseptic filled the air, making you a bit more uncomfortable.

Joel accompanied you to the doctor, his hand reassuringly holding yours throughout the process. As you anxiously waited for the results, your mind raced with thoughts about what might be causing your recent discomfort. The doctor, a friendly and reassuring figure, led you through the examination.

Finally, the doctor returned, a warm smile on their face “Congratulations, you’re pregnant.”

The news hung in the air, filling the room with a mix of shock and thrill. Tears flooded into your eyes as you realized the new life growing inside you, triggering an eruption of the mix of emotions.

As you left the clinic, a myriad of thoughts and emotions swirled within you. You decided not to immediately share the news with Joel, you were scared all over again.

You had recently passed your first year of a relationship and you were both adjusting to your life living together. You felt anxious as you walked through the hallway of the hospital

the weight of the revelation settling in your mind. The hallway seemed longer than usual, and the white walls closed in on you, echoing your internal turmoil.

Joel, sensing your unease, gently placed a hand on the small of your back as you walked together. "Are you okay, Bee? How was it?”

You forced a smile, though your eyes betrayed some tears. "Yeah, just a lot on my mind. Let's talk about it later."

“Are you sure?” He stopped in his tracks to face you. “Love, don’t scare me”

You faked the best of your smiles and nodded “I’m sure. Just a stomach bug. Let’s go” you said, walking ahead.

What if he didn’t want to have a baby with you?

Later that evening, as the three of you settled on the couch to watch a movie, the atmosphere was relaxed. Sarah, snuggled between you and Joel, seemed in high spirits.

"This is always fun, guys," she exclaimed, eyes flickering between the screen and both of you.

You and Joel shared a smile, enjoying the simplicity of your movie’s nights together. However, the air started to suffocate you. The characters on the screen welcomed a new baby, forcing Sarah to speak up.

"Hey, Dad," she began innocently, "wouldn't it be cool if Bee had a baby? I'd love a little sister."

You exchanged a glance with Joel, the topic catching you off guard. Joel's expression shifted, his features revealing a mix of surprise and hesitation. You sensed a sudden tension in the air.

"Uh, well, Sarah," Joel started carefully, "I think we're good as we are. Being a father again... it's not something I'm looking for."

Sarah's brow furrowed, processing Joel's response. "But you'd be such a great dad, and I'd be an awesome big sister!"

You placed a hand on Joel's arm, offering silent support. "It's okay, Sarah. Not everyone wants the same things in life, and that's perfectly fine."

Joel's comments had a heavy weight on your chest. Your thoughts raced as Sarah began to explain her naïve hopes for a new addition to the family. You weren't expecting this topic to come up tonight, and Joel's reaction left you crying with the silent secret growing within you.

The movie was playing on the screen, but your attention was wandering. You felt a rush of emotions, including disappointment, worry, and an increasing feeling of guilt for not telling Joel about the baby. The conversation had taken an unexpected turn, and you could feel the weight of the unspoken truth suffocating you.

Joel noticed the change in the mood. He looked at you with concern on his face. You had a decision at that point: tell the truth and or continue to bear the weight of the secret.

Once you were snug as a bug in bed, Joel was finishing putting on his t-shirt to join you in bed. The weight of the previous conversation was still pressing your heart.

“Would it be so bad, tough?” You asked, breaking the silence without glancing at Joel.

“What?”

“Having a baby with me” you said.

Joel paused, the significance of your words sinking in. He sat down on the edge of the bed, facing you. "Bee, it's not about whether it would be bad or not. It's just unexpected, and I didn't know you were thinking about that”

You two fell into a tense silence, the weight of the unspoken lingering in the air. You met Joel's eyes, searching for any sign of his feelings.

"I should have told you earlier," you admitted, your voice carrying a tinge of shame "I wanted to be sure before bringing it up."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "It's a big decision, Bee. We need to talk about it, consider everything."

Joel looked into your eyes, his expression earnest. "Bee, you're my future. I love you, and I want to build a life with you. But having a baby is a big step. We need to be sure we're ready for it."

There were no more words after that, so you chose to pretend you fell asleep feeling the weight of your thoughts; the words he had told and the secret in your belly settled in the middle of your two bodies. For the first time since you moved with him, he didn’t place his arm around your waist.

The next day wasn’t any easier. You woke up feeling nauseous, as your body had started signaling the beginning of changes. The morning light streamed through the curtains, casting a gentle glow on the room. Joel was already up, preparing breakfast in the kitchen.

As you walked into the kitchen, the aroma of eggs filled the air. Joel turned to greet you, but his expression was a mix of concern and uncertainty.

"Morning," you said, attempting a smile.

"Morning," Joel replied, setting a plate of pancakes on the table. "How are you feeling?"

“Good” you replied shortly, “I think I’m heading out earlier to the shop” you said, trying to escape from the uncomfortable conversation you were avoiding.

Joel nodded, his eyes lingering on you. "Alright, but we can't keep avoiding this. We need to talk about what's happening."

You sighed, knowing he was right but not ready to dive into that discussion just yet. "I know, Joel."

You said before heading out to the shop, you tried to focus on your daily tasks, but the undercurrent of tension followed you. The shop's familiar surroundings felt different, as if the walls themselves were aware of the unspoken secret.

And the smell of flowers was making you vomit, but you had to keep this hidden for a little bit longer.

Your thoughts kept returning to Joel and the talk you both needed to have while you arranged flowers and assisted clients, but because you were concealed in your shop, the chiming of the door distracted you from your own demons.

“I’m coming” you said, faking a happy tone. Just as you appeared in sight, you went frozen.

“This place looks as nice as I remember.”

"Connell?!" you exclaimed; your surprise evident.

"In person" Connell replied with a gorgeous grin.

The doorbell chimed again, and a customer entered, giving you a moment to compose yourself. You exchanged pleasantries with the customer, all the while glancing at Connell.

Once the customer left, Connell took a step closer. "Surprised to see me?"

"More than surprised," you admitted, a mix of emotions bubbling inside you. "What brings you here?"

Connell's gaze travelled around the shop. "Just passing through town and thought I'd drop by. It's been a while." He smiled.

“I thought you hated me” you spoke.

Connell's smile faded, and he looked at you with sincerity. "Oh my God, I could never hate you. You just followed your heart but I never hated you.” A smirk creeped on his lips “Besides, I met someone, you know?”

You felt happiness at his revelation. "Really?" you exclaimed "I'm glad. Lucky person" you replied genuinely. "I hope you're happy."

Connell nodded. "Yeah, she's great. We met at the hospital, and things just clicked. Life has a funny way of working out sometimes."

Connell leaned against the counter. "So, how's life treating you? And Joel?"

A part of you hesitated, unsure of how much to share. "Life's... complicated. Joel and I are okay, I guess."

Connell raised an eyebrow. "Trouble in paradise?"

You sighed, choosing your words carefully. "It's not that simple. We're just figuring things out, you know?"

Connell nodded, a knowing look in his eyes. "Relationships are never easy. If you ever need to talk, I'm one video call away" he said.

He genuinely cared for you. He had always had, and even now, when you weren't connected in a romantic way anymore, you were still a friend he was always going to protect.

"Thanks, Connell. I appreciate that," you said, genuinely grateful for his support.

“But you look gorgeous. You’re glowing” he said, happily taking your form. “It’s like you-

Your smile faded a little at that.

“Are you…?” He asked.

You took a deep breath, hesitating for a moment before responding. "Yes, Connell, I am."

Connell's eyes widened in surprise, and he took a step back. "Wow! Well, that's... unexpected."

"Yeah, it is," you admitted, a mix of emotions coursing through you. "I found out yesterday, and I haven't told Joel about it yet."

Connell's expression shifted to one of concern. "Joel doesn't know?"

You shook your head. "Not yet. It's complicated, Connell. I-He said he doesn't know if he wants to be a father again." You felt a lump in your throat, and you started crying without a reason. Connell hug you tightly immediately, without hesitation.

As you cried on his shoulder, the door chimed.

“What’s going on here?” Joel’s voice broke at that moment. He wasn’t happy about the scene unfolding before his eyes.

“Is this why you had been acting so weird?”

Joel's eyes narrowed as he took in the scene. Connell released you from the hug, and you wiped away your tears hastily, a knot forming in your stomach.

"Joel," you stammered, "it's not what it looks like."

Connell stepped back, giving you space to explain. Joel's gaze shifted between you and Connell,with confusion and concern on his face.

"What's happening, Bee?" Joel asked, his tone demanding an explanation.

You took a deep breath, trying to compose yourself. "Connell came to visit me, we were just catching up, and, well, emotions got the best of me."

Joel's expression remained stern, and he crossed his arms. "Catching up, huh?"

Connell, sensing the tension, spoke up. "Joel, I didn't mean to cause any trouble. I was just passing through and thought I'd say hi."

Joel's gaze didn't waver. "I think it's time for you to leave."

Connell nodded, shooting you a sympathetic look before heading toward the door. "Take care, Bee. I'll be around if you need to talk."

"Don't be an ass to her, you promised me that, remember" he warned, before stepping out.

As Connell left, the atmosphere in the room remained tense. Joel turned his attention back to you, waiting for an explanation.

You took a deep breath, meeting Joel's gaze with a mix of vulnerability and determination. "Joel, I didn't plan for Connell to show up like this. We were just talking. I didn't mean for it to become emotional."

Joel's expression remained stern, his arms still crossed. "Emotional? What kind of emotions are we talking about here?"

You hesitated, searching for the right words. "Connell noticed something, something I wasn't ready to share yet."

Joel's eyebrows furrowed. "Share? Bee, what are you talking about?"

You glanced away, a knot forming in your stomach “If I tell you I may lose you.”

“You’re losing me now, bee.” he warned.

But you didn’t say anything, you were afraid.

“Then fuck you, Bee.”

Joel turned and left the room, leaving you standing there with a sinking feeling in your chest. The once warm and hopeful atmosphere had turned cold and uncertain, and the road ahead seemed daunting.

Later that evening, you arrived home to find Sarah and Joel sitting at the dinner table. The atmosphere in the room was tense, and Joel's eyes held hurt and frustration. You took a deep breath, knowing the conversation couldn't be delayed any longer.

"Hey," you greeted, your voice carrying a hint of apprehension.

"Hey," Joel replied, his tone not better than yours.

Sarah glanced between the two of you, sensing the tension. "Is everything okay?"

You hesitated for a moment before responding. "Joel, we need to talk."

He nodded; his expression guarded. "Yeah, we do."

"I'm not staying tonight," you informed them. "I need some time away from you, and I'll be at Lily's."

Sarah's eyes widened, and she looked from you to Joel. "What's going on?"

You shot Joel a quick glance before turning back to Sarah. "It's just something we need to figure out, Baby girl. Don't worry"

Without waiting for a response, you headed upstairs to pack a bag for the night. The weight of the situation pressed on you as you grabbed a few essentials, unsure of what was going to happen tomorrow.

Joel followed you upstairs, the tension in the air palpable. As you started packing a bag, he stood in the doorway, unsure of how to approach the conversation. The atmosphere in the room felt heavy with unspoken words.

"Love, please," Joel finally spoke, his voice filled with a mix of frustration and concern. "You don't have to go."

You continued packing, avoiding eye contact. "Joel, I need some space to think. I can't stay here tonight."

He stepped further into the room, his gaze pleading. "I'm sorry for how I reacted. I shouldn't have said those things."

You sighed, pausing your packing but not turning to face him. "Joel, this is bigger than just tonight. We need to figure out what we both want and if we're on the same page."

He took a step closer, his hand gently resting on your shoulder. "Bee, I love you. I don't want you to go, especially not like this."

You met his eyes, seeing the sincerity in them. The conflict within you intensified, torn between the emotions inside you.

"I need time, Joel," you whispered, your voice shaky. "I need to understand why you don’t want the same things for us."

Joel's features softened, and he removed his hand, allowing you the space you needed. The room was filled with an uneasy silence as you zipped up your bag, your mind racing with thoughts and emotions.

"I messed up," Joel admitted, his voice carrying regret. "I love you, Bee. I don't want to lose you."

You closed your eyes, the weight of the situation pressing down on you. "You won't lose me" you clarified.

As you made your way to the door, the heaviness of your decision bore down on you. In your hurry, you stumbled, almost losing your balance. The bags in your hands threatened to spill, but just in the nick of time, Joel's strong arms caught you. His reflexes kicked in, and he steadied you, a mixture of concern and confusion in his eyes.

"Bee, be careful," he urged, his hands still on your arms. The warmth of his touch, even in this moment of tension, sent a shiver through you.

You winced, feeling the impact of the close call. The realization of your vulnerability sank in, and you instinctively placed a protective hand over your belly. Joel's eyes widened as he followed the movement.

Concern etched across his face; he gently placed a hand on your stomach. "Are you okay? What's going on?"

Your eyes met his, and in that shared gaze, Joel sensed something deeper. A silent understanding passed between you, and he connected the dots. It was like all his life passed in front of his eyes.

With a soft gasp, Joel whispered, "Are you...?"

You didn’t respond, instead you hold his hand placed over your stomach and gripped tightly as if this was the decisive moment in the course of your relationship.

but still, his features on his face were unreadable. You knew what those moments meant between you. The words say but nothing back in return. It was like all that night all over again and you couldn't bear silence once again. You weren't alone this time. Unable to endure the quiet any longer, you broke it with a whispered, "Joel." Your voice carried a mix of vulnerability and hope, seeking connection and understanding.

At that moment, Joel let go of you carefully, creating a bit of space between you two. His eyes continued to hold a mixture of awe and realization, and it was clear that the weight of the revelation was sinking inside him.

What he had to say was going to define the rest of your story.

a/n: Reader loves self-sabotaging.

tags 💌: @joeldjarin @borhapparker @fatima-marisa @kirsteng42 @paleidiot @harriedandharassed @runningmom94 @pedr0swh0r3 @ssacharcoalgrey @missladym1981 @littleshadow17 @sevillagrenada

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rafesbabygirl · 4 months

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One Month Anniversary

Rafe Cameron x Latina!Gf

Summary: It’s yours and Rafes one month anniversary and you want to make something special and cook one of Rafes favorite foods.

Word count: 1.1k

You can proudly say life has been really great recently. You and your boyfriend Rafe had been official for a month now, and you had been planning to surprise him for your one month anniversary.

You roll out of bed still tired then ever since last night you stayed up late planning everything for today to be perfect. You walk in to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

After getting ready you check your phone and see a message from your boyfriend telling you good morning. A smile is set on your face and you can’t help but squeal a little since you’ve always liked Rafe and now he was finally yours.

You text him to come over since you have a surprise for him and he gladly says he’ll be over in the afternoon. You head down stairs to get everything ready.

“Good morning ma” you say are you see your mom at the kitchen table with your dad.

“Good morning hija. Is Rafe coming over today?” Your mom always liked you and Rafe together and she loved having him over cooking for him since she loved cooking for the people she cared about.

“Yeah todays our one month anniversary. Also I was gonna ask you if you could give me the recipe to make caldo de res? You know how Rafe loves eating it so I wanted to make it for him.”

“Of course I can, I’ll go write it down for you .” Your mom says with a big smile on her face.

After your mom gives you the recipe you head to the store to pick up the things you need to make the soup. You also grab some desserts,flowers and candles for the table so you could enjoy.

Once you get home you immediately start making the soup. You couldn’t lie and say you weren’t nervous about cooking for rafe, your love language was always doing stuff for the people you love, so you really wanted to make the soup perfect for rafe.

Once you finished making the soup you start warming up the tortillas and cut up some limes. When you were finished with everything you go outside to set up the table with decorations and to lay out the food.

After you finish setting everything up for Rafe to come over, you check your phone and see Rafe texted you he was on his way.

You quickly went upstairs to freshen up your look by fixing your makeup and hair. You changed out of the outfit you wore for the day into a cute white dress with some sandals.

You hear the doorbell ring and go downstairs where you see your mother and Rafe hugging and talking.

“Hey baby, wow you look beautiful.” Rafe says as you walk downstairs.

“Thank you mi amor.” You say as you finally reach downstairs and hug him and leave a peck on his lips.

“You guys remind me so much of me and your dad Y/n.” Your mom says while looking at you and rafe with admiration in her eyes.

You and rafe look at each other and smile while he grabs your hand and interlocks your fingers together.

“Let’s go to the backyard I wanna show you my surprise” You say smiling and drag him outside to the back yard.

“Okay so I know one month may not be a big deal to other people but I still wanted to celebrate because I love being with you and I love being your girlfriend.”

“I love being your boyfriend, and one month is a big deal to me and I love that you wanted to celebrate today.”

He leans down to kiss you and you instantly melt into it. One of your favorite things on this earth is kissing Rafe.

“Okay take a seat please.”

He pulls out a chair at the table where you set up the food and decorations.

“Alright so I know one of your favorite things to do while you’re over is to eat and one of your favorite foods is caldo de res, so I asked my mom if she could give me the recipe so I could make it for you.”

You start taking the lid of the pot with the soup inside and Rafe immediately leans in to smell it.

“Mm baby that smells good as fuck, you know you didn’t have to do all of this.”

“Yeah I know but I wanted today to be special and besides I was craving this anyway.”

You start serving the bowls of rice and put the soup on top with everything Rafe likes.

You sit down and look at Rafe nervously as he starts to taste it.

“Holy shit baby, it tastes so fucking good. I could eat the whole pot right now i’m not even kidding.”

You laugh as he starts hyping you up and hide your face in your hands since you get shy easily.

“Come on now none of that, come here.”

He leans closer to you and places his lips on yours repeatedly whispering “I love you’s” against your lips.

Once he leans away you see him reach in his pocket and pulls out a small black velvet box and places it in front of you on the table.

“What’s this?” You ask looking at him confused.

“Well it is our one month anniversary so I got you something.”

You feel your heart melt instantly at his words. Rafe was always so sweet to you.

“Aw baby you didn’t have to buy me anything.”

“I know but I wanted to. Come on open it.”

You smile at him and grab the box and open it. Inside was a gold necklace with a letter “R”. You grab it and look at rafe with your mouth slightly open in shock.

“Rafe I- I don’t even know what to say.”

“ You don’t have to say anything baby. Come on let me put it on you.

You both stand up, Rafe gets behind you and you pull your hair up so he can put the necklace on. Once it’s on he sets his hand on your waist and leaves a kiss on your neck.

You place your hand on the necklace and look up at him with slight teary eyes.

“Thank you so much Rafe, te amo.” You say while throwing your arms around his neck and he puts his hands on your waist and holds you against him.

“I love you too baby” He whispers in your ear while hugging you tighter.

You guys sit down and finish eating and end the night in your bedroom showing him how much you love him.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x latina!reader #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron fic #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x latina!gf

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berenwrites · 3 months

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Arms of Love - Stranger Things - Steddie - G

Rating: G| cw: none | tags: eddie lives, little bit of angst – lot of fluff, post season 4, pre-Vecna being finished off

Prompt: Love is the heartbeat I can feel when I hug him.

A/N: Written for @steddielovemonth day 8. It’s my wedding anniversary today, and my husband bought me two plushy otters cuddling, so of course I had to pick this prompt. Sorry, no beta today - no time, going out to dinner in an hour.

Also on AO3 | All My Other Stranger Things Fic

Arms of Love: Whatever You Need

Steve woke up with a start, breathing hard as the tendrils of the nightmare curled around his brain. The golden sunlight coming through the window helped him push it away as he lay there just breathing for a little while.

It was nearly July and apparently his unconscious mind was determined to celebrate the anniversary of Starcourt, even though he was studiously ignoring it when awake. He hadn’t been sleeping well, so he’d come up to his room to take a nap in the middle of the afternoon. He’d hope the timing would help. It seemed it hadn’t.

The dream hadn’t been Starcourt exactly, but a mishmash of that and their latest encounter with the Upside Down. His mind’s eye was full of Robin and Eddie, both bloody and dead, with the background of the mindflayer and the Russian bunker. It chilled him to the bone.

Robin was at Vicky’s on their third official date, so he could not go and find her to banish the horrors in his brain, but Eddie, lately exonerated, graduated (Steve was not asking how Owens had managed that), but still staying with Steve until Hawkins caught up, was downstairs. The town had decided to hunt him in no time, but it was taking longer for some of the worst culprits to admit their mistakes.

Eddie had been staying with Steve since they’d found him half-dead, spat out by one of the fissures. No one could explain how he was alive, but the latest theory was bat venom and luck. Given how fast Steve’s own injuries had healed and hadn’t gone septic either, Owens had a whole new line of research involving what Dustin and the other kids had christened demobats. Steve didn’t want to know about that either unless he really had to.

All he knew was that something had given them back Eddie, and while getting to know the outspoken metalhead properly as Eddie recovered, Steve had fallen hard. Luckily for him, Eddie had smiled at him, dimples and all, when he had finally confessed, and kissed him until he couldn’t breathe.

Climbing off the bed, Steve headed downstairs.

Eddie was facing away from him, standing, and leaning over the grand dining room table at the end of the living room. There were D&D manuals and bits of paper everywhere as Eddie prepared a celebratory campaign as his farewell to Hellfire.

Without pausing, Steve walked up behind his boyfriend, wrapped his arms around Eddie’s waist, and plastered himself over Eddie’s back, the side of his head pressing against the soft material of Eddie’s Metallica t-shirt.

“Hey, Sweetheart,” Eddie said, straightening up a little, but not trying to escape his hold, “everything okay?”

“Need to hear your heart,” Steve admitted, listening to the regular thump below his ear.

“Nightmare?” Eddie asked quietly.

“Uh-huh,” he replied, letting the rhythm settle into him and calm his own heartbeat.

They both had more than their fair share of trauma to deal with and Eddie didn’t question him, just standing there and letting him do what he needed to do.

“I love you,” he said eventually.

“Love you too, Sweetheart,” Eddie told him, rubbing one of his arms.

“Sorry for…” he started to say.

“Na-ah,” Eddie interrupted before he could get anymore words out, turning in his embrace. “No apologies necessary. Feeling better.”

Steve closed his mouth and just nodded. When Robin came over to tell them all about her date, she was going to get hugged within an inch of her life too, but for now he was okay.

“Good,” Eddie said, smiling at him with those killer dimples he was helpless against, “then I want to know what you think of this hideous trap I just thought up. I need your paladin brain.”

“I still don’t get why you call me that,” he complained with absolutely zero heat.

“That’s just what a paladin would say, Sweetheart,” Eddie told him, kissing him on the nose. “Now, come look.”

Steve’s chest swelled with love. He had no idea what he had done to get so lucky.

All My Other Stranger Things Fic

#stranger things #stranger things fanfic #fanfiction #steddie #steve harrington #steve x eddie #eddie munson #eddie lives #post season 4 #steddielovemonth #eddie x steve #steddie fic #steddie fluff #steddie ficlet

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marchenmusika · 1 year

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For more context on the Re:vale marriage thing, from Tachibana-san (Yuki’s Va) and Hoshi-san’s(Momo’s va) talk on tha ainana expo, Tachibana actually just straight up decided that ‘today Re:vale got married and may 6 is their wedding anniversary’

And no, this isn’t a joke. We all know just how professional the voice actors of i7 are especially these two, so ofc before Tachibana said that he asked for the staff’s approval first and asked if it really was okay to say that, and the staff actually did agree🥹 Ofc they know the risks that comes with it but i7 is not just some regular franchise, they openly include controversial topics regarding sexuality and gender, we have Kaoru, a canon trans character, as a concrete proof to that. So yeah this is real as it can get. Re:vale is now officially married, it may not be mentioned that they’re married by i7’s main story but this is actually said by the actual va with an actual approval from the staff, and the staff are the ones who make the last decisions and are majorly involved in the making of i7. Also, if you’ve read and understand their story, you’ll know just how much these two truly loves each other. So yeah, congrats everyone, this is not just some fandom joke anymore!!

Happy Marriage Re:vale!💚💗

#idolish7 #re:vale #I just summed up what I got from twt so if u want a more detailed report just look it up on twt #I can’t believe this is actually happening😭😭#Congrats momo and yukiii!!

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pretty-idol-hell · 4 days

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youtube

The PriPara 10th Anniversary video and Tweet is up again! I believe this information wasn't supposed to be released until after the concert, but someone released it early. Oops.

I also noticed that the official Idol Land Twitter name and avatar has been changed. The name of the Twitter is now "Idol Land PriPara and PriPara 10th Anniversary", the new avatar features the 10th Anniversary logo, and the description explains that this account will be covering both Idol Land and the 10th Anniversary while it is ongoing.

(It's hard to imagine Idol Land ending during the 10th Anniversary, but having the official account being used for something else and the lack of a season 2 announcement today is a little concerning I have to admit.)

Okay, so about the actual announcement:

There will be a PriPara exhibition held this August 9th-25th 2024 in Tokyo, specifically Shibuya. They are also planning to bring the exhibition to Fukuoka and Osaka as well.

Having been to the Rainbow Live 10th Anniversary exhibition this past March, this honestly sounds very similar. They mention displaying PriPara's chronology (the Rainbow Live one had an episode-by-episode guide on the wall) and photo spots of Making Dramas and other scenes (same, we got a Prism Jump and Prism Stone shop as well as a bunch of mini ones), as well as stage costumes (well, we didn't get that at the RL one, instead we got merch and a guitar). The Rainbow Live one was cute, but very small. I was curious if this one might be bigger since they are taking it on tour but looking up the venue (地下1階, where it says "Event Space") this one looks equally small. So, perhaps not worth flying to Japan for, but be sure to check it out if you'll already be there!

Now, she's already made the rounds but the video also announced a brand new character. Not just for the 10th Anniversary, but the 1000th Anniversary!

Laalulu! She is a transfer student from the future, come to study about PriPara at the exhibition.

So... This is very funny for several reasons.

First of all, celebrating the 1000th Anniversary at the same time as the 10th is very on brand for PriPara considering it's long been canon that PriPara has existed for thousands of years, so why wouldn't it exist for thousands more?

And of course, although they don't acknowledge it directly, Laalulu is very clearly a fusion of Laala and Falulu.

Thus suggesting that Laala and Falulu's families become... intertwined at some point, somehow.

But at the same time, they are safeguarding themselves from suggesting she's a direct descendant since she's from so ridiculously far in the future. Yes, I know that vocal dolls, if she is one, can live for thousands of years. But, if she was already a thousand years old, why would she need to study PriPara in our age? So, I think she must be relatively young.

Or is she even a vocal doll at all? Because... not sure how that would be possible either.

My personal headcanon on this would be that perhaps Falulu or a Falulu clone becomes a real girl at some point, and meets up with a descendant of Laala.

Which, if true, would mean that they not only stole @moonlit-angel-serenity 's OC but mine as well, since that's what happens to Hinode in my canon LOL.

Haha, who knows. I'm pretty sure they will never explain it.

But, it seems to me this character is a character specifically made for the exhibition (especially since the logo features Laala and Falulu). Unless a voice actress is announced for her soon, I don't think they will be doing much of anything else with this character.

(In the video, Laala speaks to her and Laalulu replies back with text only, so it seems that she does not have one at this point.)

#Youtube #idol land pripara #pripara

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goldenseresinretriever · 15 days

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This feels so surreal to say but it’s been SIX MONTHS since the start of the SDDU????? Okay yes the official concept turned six months old on the 7th, BUT Snitches Get Stitches is officially six months old TODAY, and we wouldn’t have the SDDU as we know it if I hadn’t decided to start writing SGS, so here we are!!!

These past six months have been so so surreal and I am so thankful to every single person that’s ever read anything I’ve written. For those who were there from the beginning, you know that there wasn’t originally going to be an SDDU, it was literally just going to be moodboards and some fun concepts and then people actually latched onto the concept and wanted more and to those people, just know that you’re the reason that these fics exist. The fact that I can say not just fic but FICS PLURAL??? We’re on the third installment of the series and still going strong??? I’m so proud of the world and characters I’ve created and the stories I’ve been able to tell.

As someone who grew up writing and loving it, this has been such a surreal experience. I always hoped but never truly dreamed that people would want to engage with my stories. When I first starting writing fanfiction years ago, I was writing for an audience of one. Now the fact that HUNDREDS of people have read and are reading my writing my work every day is insane and I can’t believe that this is my life. The fact that I’ve completed two fics that are the equivalent of two novels is something I never thought I’d be able to do.

I’m going through it irl right now and I wish I could say I have a more comprehensive list of exciting things to announce today but instead I’m going to say that I have some really fun stuff cooked up for the anniversary that I’m excited to share and while I’m disappointed that I can’t share them as soon as I want to, they are coming soon! I’ll add them to this lovely post as they do! But for now, I’ll just list them out:

SDD Press Conference, 6-month anniversary edition: ONGOING! Let’s celebrate the anniversary in traditional Dogfighter fashion of a good ole press conference! Send in your questions for the characters (and me if you want to) and they’ll answer them! Serious or silly, all questions are welcome! Runs from now until next Tuesday so feel free to go ahead and start sending stuff in!!!

SDD Jerseys First Group Order: PRE-ORDERS ARE OPEN UNTIL MAY 1!!

Want to rep the Dogfighters in real life? You’ll have the opportunity to order your own San Diego Dogfighter’s jersey! These will be available for a limited time through a group order system! All six guys will be available! (If there’s an interest, I could absolutely look into making jerseys for the girls as well!)

Muscle Memory Masterlist Announced and Posted: As usual the fic won’t be starting yet since I write one at a time but some of you have been asking about this fic for a while and I think it’s time to share the title and the summary

ALSO!!! I just hit 500 followers????? If you read this far, stick around for a separate post detailing some exciting celebratory events for that!

As always, I love you all!!!! And thank you all so much for getting onboard for this crazy journey!!!

- Ruthie 🩵

#san diego dogfighters au #san diego dogfighters #san diego dogfighters hockey au #snitches get stitches // sdd #you catch more bees with honey // sdd #sgs // sdd #ycmbwh // sdd #sdd press conference #false confidence // sdd #fc // sdd #the long game // sdd #tlg // sdd #don’t wake the dragon // sdd #dwtd // sdd #muscle memory // goldenseresinretriever #mm // goldenseresinretriever

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lookismaddict · 5 months

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Happy 1-Year Anniversary to Rendezvous 🎊

Hey guys, it’s been a while. 😀 (I can now see the flaming torches and pitch forks heading my way… 🔥) I decided to come back because today marks the actual 1-year anniversary of when I joined the Lookism community and posted for the very first time on Tumblr, which is none other than Rendezvous’s Introduction. The story that started all of the chaos. 🖤 And yes, I posted it on Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving to those who celebrate! 🦃💨

I’m so sorry for leaving all of you for almost half a year, and I missed you all dearly. There has been many ups and downs in my life these past few months, and I could safely say that I’m okay, and that I have healed from the loss of that one person in my life. I’m also happy that I have grown as a person. Not just my age (I’m 21 now, and I’m officially an adult. Woo!) but also, this sense of maturity that I have acquired from opening myself to new surroundings. I got the opportunity to reconnect with many people in my life socially, while I have developed many new relationships with others over the span of four months.

To be frank, the reason why I had to take a huge break from Tumblr wasn’t just because of my mourning period of a past loved one. It was so that I can mend myself mentally, physically, and socially. Tumblr was my escapism, and it’ll always be there whenever I feel like coming back. But being away from Tumblr made me realize that I should cherish the people that I have in my life more, than just pushing them off to the side and remain anti-social for my own personal enjoyment. And it also gave me some time to think and heal. It refreshed my mind greatly, and I might be coming back more frequently (if school wasn’t being such a pain).

However, I will try and be active again. It’ll take time for me to get rid of this uncomfortable awkwardness from me, and I will eventually go back to my usual unhinged self. 👍🏽 (Plus, I have no idea what’s been going on in Lookism and I’m not updated, but I have seen some spoilers on other social media outlets.) So, I will dive back into the Lookism rabbit hole sometime soon.

As for my writing, I plan on continuing them again and I need to take care of those drafts. (Yes, I will be continuing Rendezvous and my other works. Don’t worry about it.) Again, happy anniversary to my baby, Rendezvous. I’m proud of myself for pressing that “Post” button a year ago, on this very day. (With my finger hovering shakily over the button and all. 😭) You will surely see more of Gun and (Y/N) sometime in the future, including other characters too. Until then, Cat is off and ascending to reply to everyone’s messages, comments, and asks! 😼👐🏽 (Descending. Most likely in he-)

Just beat me up already.

#rendezvous 1st anniversary #lookismaddict #Cat is back (again) 😸#I surely missed a lot #I feel like a veteran coming back 🧍🏽‍♀️#hoping all of you have been doing good

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iluvshinytwink · 1 year

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Glue Song - Jude Bellingham

"I've never known someone like you. Tangled in love, stuck by you from the glue."

Summary: Jude takes the time to remember the tender moments of when he fell for you.

A/N: GIVE IT UP FOR BEABADOOBEE!!! glue song's officially out and im gonna celebrate it by doing what i do best: being delulu :)

i wanted to stay up and wait until glue song was coming out but i fell asleep 💀💀

sorry for the late valentine's special, happy late valentine's day to u guys, thank u for all the support u've given my delulu hour oneshots <33

Now Playing . . . Glue Song by Beabadoobee

Today marks the first year anniversary of your relationship with Jude. Today was a special day, not only for couples but for you, specifically for you. Today marked the day that love binded two people. Today was the day you and Jude spent as a couple, officially. The memory was enough to send butterflies in your stomach and a bashful smile on your face.

Jude invited you for a late night walk in the park. It was silent, there were no cars roaming by, the sky was was but the moon shined brightly, stars scattered everywhere. You mindlessly walked around the park, looking up above and desperately tried counting the stars. Jude trailed behind you, his heartbeat accelerating. His hands started accumulating sweat and his eyes fixed on the ground. Jude wanted to confess to you today. Valentine's day.

You suddenly stopped and Jude's eyes peeled from the ground and looked at you. You turned your back and looked at Jude with a smile. "You okay? You're so silent." you joked. Jude's heart skipped a beat, his eyes slightly widened. "..Sorry." he softly responded. You faced your friend completely, hands in front of you. "What's on your mind?" you asked. "You really do know me, don't you?" Jude chuckled, finally feeling at ease. You smiled. Your eyes were on Jude's eyes, the moonlight bounced off him, his face was highlighted thanks to the moon. Your heartbeat quickened, he was beautiful, ethereal even.

"I just.. want to tell you something." Jude sighed. Your mind began wandering of what he wanted to ask you, possibilities ran through your mind.

You didn't say anything. Your eyes looked at Jude with intent, that alone was an answer.

Jude's eyes met yours, there was a nervous expression on his face. "I like you. More than like.. I think I--" Jude stumbled, his eyes met the ground once more.

You quickly hugged Jude. You hugged him because you knew you felt the same way. Jude was shocked but he gladly hugged back. A smile painted your face. "I take that as a.. yes?" Jude chuckled. "More than you believe." you said, squeezing him tighter.

Life ever since that late night turned for the better.

Don't forget to kiss me or else you'll have to miss me.

Since Jude was a professional footballer, he'd leave the house while you were softly sleeping.

The first time he did this, he almost overslept! His arms were wrapped around you and your arms were wrapped around his, your face faced him and his face faced yours.

His eyes flutter open, immediately being met with your face. He felt a tired smile creep his face, his hand gently touching your hair as he pulled you closer to him. The room was cold but thanks to your body heat he was warm. He placed his chin on top of your head, his eyes closing again.

He then remembered he had practice..

His eyes shot open. He looked at the curtains and the sun was already peeking out. He was gonna be late. He felt a rough sigh escape his lips as he began slowly removing his hands from you. He tried to do it as quiet and nonchalant as possible as to not wake you up.

He wrapped the remaining blanket around you so you would still be warm. His warm feet touched the cold ground and a shiver went through his spine.

When he entered the shower he remembered your soft skin against his, your hair tangled around his fingers, your tired eyes meeting with his, your soft lips on his. He felt his heart skip a beat and his the memory of last night played on repeat, your face imprinted on his brain.

By the time he entered back into the bedroom, dressed and ready he saw you, sat up with a foul expression on your face. He chuckled at the sight. "Jude..?" you groggily mumbled. "Morning, hon." he smiled. "It's so early.. where are you going..?" you asked, rubbing your eyes. "I'm off to practice, bae." he explained, tying his shoes. You grumbled a response, going back underneath the sheets.

Jude quickly took the blankets from your body, sending a cold breeze to your body. Your knees were tight to your chest as he looked at your boyfriend with an expression that said: "What the fuck." Jude giggled. He bent down to you, your nostrils being filled with his gently cologne. He puckered his lips out and planted a kiss on your forehead, hands on your cheeks. You groaned in response which made him laugh even more. He looked at you, face smooshed by his hands, he smiled once more before planting a kiss on your lips. "Asshole." you mumbled out.

"Bye, hon!" he announced.

I guess I'm stuck forever by the glue, oh and you.

Finding the right words to use for this song, I have you in mind so it won't take so long

Until now, he still manages to find himself tongue tied when talking or looking at you. He's so mesmerized by your honey-sweet voice of a part of you facial feature that his tongue is quite literally caught by a cat.

His eyes physically soften when you're rambling, his ears turn red and he's focused on you and you only.

You glanced at your boyfriend, stopping during your rant. His chin rested on his hand as he stared at you mindlessly with the goofiest smile on his face. A smile creeped on your face before bursting into laughter. Jude snapped out of his daydreaming and immediately got flustered.

"You looked so dumb!" you cackled. "I wasn't even looking at you!" your boyfriend protested.

You laughed on an on and eventually he just stopped defending himself knowing that you caught him in the act looking like the most hopeless romantic you've ever seen.

Never thought I'd find you but you're here and so I love you

During harsh nights after a rough game, Jude's always tired and rarely speaks. He keeps to himself after rough games. When this first happened you were concerned-- more than concerned. It was a bit rare to see your boyfriend so silent and zoned out in front of you and you were worried for him.

Jude lays down on the couch and a harsh sigh escapes his lips. He closes his eyes, in hope to forget what happened during the game, to forget the outcome.

You walk in the living room, seeing your boyfriend's things scattered on the floor and a pair of feet hung from your couch. You neared the couch and found your boyfriend with his eyes closed but his eyebrows were knitted, making him look like he was mad despite looking like he was sleeping.

"Jude?" you murmured. Jude's eyes slowly open, his eyebrows finally back to normal. "You okay?" you asked, sitting on the floor. Jude turned to you with a nod, his eyes drooped and his were lips cracked. You felt bad for your boyfriend, both of you know that he can't win every game but this particular game took out everything he had. You connect your soft lips into his cracked ones. Jude was momentarily shocked but quickly kissed back. You pulled away after a few seconds. "There's always another match, don't dwell too much on this one, okay?" you soft voice reassured. He felt himself smile for the first time during the night. "10 more minutes, okay? Then I'll be back to drag your ass to bed." you got up, pinching his ear jokingly.

Jude was thankful that even during these times where he didn't want to talk, you understood him, you spoke to him softly and warmly. He wouldn't want anyone else to be his.

Feb 14. 4:35 pm

Jude was driving around since his practice was done, you were in the passenger's seat, softly sleeping. Jude parks at a local park. You felt your eyes pry open due to the sound of the car suddenly coming to a stop, the aircon slowly vanishing. "Jude? Where are we?" you yawned, unbuckling your seatbelt. "Let's go for a walk, it's boring in the car if you just sleep." Jude joked, getting out of the car. You didn't quite hear what he said because you quite literally just woke up but followed him out the car.

At this point, Jude's already a few feet away from you and you jogged to be level with him. "Where are we?" you grumbled. Jude didn't respond to your question, instead he offered his hand to you. You stared at it for a few seconds before intertwining your fingers with his. His thumb rubs your hand, almost reassuringly. At this point.. you didn't really care where you were walking to, as long as you were hand in hand with your lovely boyfriend.

You looked at the ground, seeing that both you and your boyfriend's shoes were walking rhythmically. Suddenly, you see your boyfriend's shoes disappear. You stop for a moment and your eyes began scanning for him. He was on top of a sidewalk. "Are you just gonna stare at me?" he joked, squeezing your hand. Jude continued walking and you quickly jumped on the sidewalk before continuing your walk with Jude.

Your feet were met with patches of grass, the sound of your shoes crinkling against the grass was a bit comforting to you. Jude let goes of your hand, leaving it warm. You looked for your boyfriend once more and see that he's situated himself on a bench. You followed your boyfriend and sat down beside him, a few inches away from him.

Your eyes wandered around the park and found your eyes pinned on the sky. The clouds were scattered and the sky was painted in yellow, orange and a tinge of red.

"Happy anniversary." your boyfriend suddenly said, slipping in a flower into your fingertips. You felt yourself flinch for a second. Your eyes connected to the flower that was slipped into your hands. It was beautiful. You looked at your boyfriend with a loving smile and a blush on your cheeks.

Jude scooched himself beside you, your arms touched by the contact. "Thank you, for everything." he whispered. With your vacant hand, you reached for his hand and taking in two of his fingers. "You're such a hopeless romantic." you commented, looking at your boyfriend with a cheeky smile. "Only for you." he chuckled, looking at you back with a soft smile. "That night.." you mumbled. You looked in front of you, finally remembering this is where he confessed. Jude rested his head on your shoulder. "To be honest, I don't know what to say." Jude chuckled nervously. "You didn't know what to say that night either." you joked, referring to the night when he confessed. He stumbled on his words as his cheeks were red because of embarrassment, nervousness. "But you liked me back." Jude said, inching near you. "How couldn't I? You looked so cute trying to find your words." you laughed aloud. "Mean." Jude plainly commented, squeezing your hand. Jude's eyes closed, drifting into momentary sleep.

You were thankful for him and he was thankful for you. Everyday was something to look forward to. You woke up everyday knowing that your boyfriend would have his arms all over you. You lived every night knowing that he'd tangle himself into you.

The both of you were stuck to each other, by the glue.

I'm not wrong when I say I've been stuck by the glue. By the glue onto you.

I've been stuck by the glue, right onto you.

I've been stuck by the glue.

I've never known someone like you.

I've never known.

(THIS EXCEEDED 1500 WORDS.. WHY IS THIS SO LONG.. 😧💔💔 anyways 3 POSTS IN A DAY?!??!?!!?!! so slay, u guys are fed for the entire week. At this point, please anybody send a request and you'll have it in 2-3 business days, pinky swear!! ANYWAYS HOPE U ENJOYED THIS AND MAKE SURE TO SMASHSHSHSHS THAT LIKE BUTTON AND SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE BANGRS LIKE THSESESEEE!!!)

also if there's any goofy grammatical mistakes, ill prolly fix it in a few hours, i like really need to piss.

#jude bellingham #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham x you #jude bellingham imagines #iluvshinytwink #imsoslaying #Spotify

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