#okay most of the time i dont't feel normal | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lydiablackblade · 6 months

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I'm getting up from the chair and taking a deep breath. I'm fixing my eyes on the old, faded posters on the wall in front of me.

Hello, I'm Lydia and I'm crowleysexual

My gaze is swapping through the empty room, through the empty chairs which are formulating a small circle. But no, no miracle has happened in the last five seconds. No one's answering back a "Hello Lydia". This is still a one-person support group. This one person is me.

I'm taking another deep breath then making a chuckle. Why am I so nervous? No one is here. I'm finally blurting it out.

Okay, look. I know this is stupid. I really do know. I just don't... Ehh. I know, when it comes to physical aspects, it's all David, okay? Those are David's legs, those are David's hips, hands, chest and neck, David's jaws and nose and hair. Just... just... when they belong to David, these are all just simply okay. Don't get me wrong, I do adore David in general. He's a handsome, kind, funny and sexy man, I would be fool to deny. I like him very much. He's my generation's Doctor. I liked him in Broadchurch and I liked him as Kilgrave, however it's creepy to say that, I admit. But he's not doing things to me.

I'm stopped for a moment. I'm looking down to my interlaced fingers in my lap. I'm starting fidgeting with my thumbs then I'm going on.

Whereas when those legs and hips and hands and chest and deliciously long, bitable neck, and kissable jawline and nose and those gorgeous eyes and (preferably long) ginger hair belong to Crowley, well... I feel myself like a horny teenager. Like I haven't felt for a long time now. It makes me feel like I have never felt this thing to anyone before. It doesn't even matter if the represenation is femme or male. All I need to know that's Crowley and I'm in. Really don't know how David did it, made this character so irresistable. I'm falling for Crowley's gloomy mood and smirks and his rare laughters. For his cynicism and kind heart. He's such a dork, such a silly, goofy, cartoon-character entity and in the same time has this sex-on-long-legs, ginger-goth-mistery-man attitude. And that works. How how much it works on me! I could watch just how he walks for hours.I could do so many other things...

Suddenly I'm stopping to speak. I'm panting and blushed. I'm clearing my throath. That is enough for today. It was overwhelming to say all these things aloud. No need to rush.

Thank you everyone attending to the first meeting of Crowleysexuals Anon Support Group. See you here next week at the same time.

Oh, I'm so stupid, I told my name...

#sorry brainrot #but it's true #oh my pretty pretty boy #what are you doing to me #sometimes i really don't feel myself nomal when it comes to these ineffable idiots #okay most of the time i dont't feel normal #i need help #crowley #anthony j crowley #crowley good omens #good omens #david tennant

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heyitsbia · 2 years

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Lizzie and the Mystery girl ( Part 2 )

"How is it complicated..you eather like parties are you don't!" There she went again, pushing people! She just couldn't help but argue, to debate! It was the very reason that Florence was her only friend..no one else could stand her. Though she didn't seem annoyed by her commnet, she seemed bewildred. Though she didn't say anything. For the first time, she looked in her in the eyes, and she could't help but gaze right back into her. They were suprisingly green. And not the loose green that seemed to be in most eyes, but green that made you question the reality of what you're looking at because nothing that perfect could be of existence. Also, Lizzie had never seen a blond green eyes. She was rare. She liked rare.

"What?" she asked, feeling a little insecure about her stare. She squinted her eyed, and Lizzie felt her mood drop a little because seh coudn't see as mush of her eyes anymore.

"It's just that, no one has ever talked to me like you are."

"Well, no one has ever talked to me. Period," she said and as soon as she did regret it. But flet relief when a smile appeared on her face and she heard the now familiar chuckle of her.

"I don't see why?"

"Let's just say normally i'm not exactly Mrs.Popular."

"You sure look like you could be. I mean this in every good way, you're kinda hot!"

Lizzie laughed. "No, i'm not!"

"Okay you're not hot." the girl said. "You're beautiful."

She opend her mouth to retaliate but was suddenly stopped by the feeling of something warm touching her hand.

"And don't try to fight me on it." the girl continued.

This was crazy! She didn't even know this girl and she was holding her hand!

"You know normally, I wouldn't ever get this cloce to a girl i did know, yet alone a girl i didn't."

she smirked. "It seems like you are doung a lot of things you don't normally do."

"That's because normally i'm a straight line." she looked at her in cofusion.

"A straight line?"

"Yeah, you know..i do what i'm supposed to..i dont't break any rules."

"Why not?"

"Because it's what i supposed to do. It's just who i am. And right now i am being the furthest thing from who i am!"

"So what!? Maybe that's a good thing. Like you said, normally people wouldn't talk to you. Well, i;m loving the conversation i;m having with you right now. Maybe it's because i;m talking about the rule breaking you, not the normal you."

Lizzie stayed silent still thinking about what she had said.

"Look here's my mission for you." the girl started, "Break more rules. Live a little."

Lizzie looked her in the eyes again. "I will if you will."

"That's a deal i will make." the girl said with a smile.

they stayed like that for what seemed like the longest time.

"You know you have a really pretty eyes." she said as her blood rushed to her cheeks. When she didn't say anything back she started to worry the she was being a creep.

"Sorry?!" I didn't mean that! Gosh, I'm a creep!" She exclaimed.

"No," she laughed," It's not that! Not at all! you're just so..different." she manage to get out. "I've never met anyone like you."

she was so close that she could feel her breath prickle her skin.

"I'm going to kiss you." her hand made their way to the sides of her face.

"But i don't even know you! And i don't kiss a girl that i don't know!"

Our lips were inches apart.

"I thought you are breaking our normal rules?" And with that, her lips were on her before she could argue. It was everythinh she could imagine and more. Her lips were icy but felt fresh on her wich were warm from the rush of blood. Her hands made their way down to her neck, as she started to rise from the swing, trying to get closer to her. For some reason, her touxh felt familiar, yer they had just met? All too soon it was over.

She was the one to break the kiss, but she kept her grasp on her attention. She looked her deeo in the eyes and thought to herself on how she definitely picked the right time to go for a walk.

Lizzie smiled up at her, half of her stick on the fact that she just kiss a stranger, and the other half stuck on the fact that she liked it!

when she finally cought her breath and broke the silence. "What now?" she asked.

the girl smirked. "Now, you leave this party with this memory. And next time you feel like you're a 'Straight line', you can think bavk to this moment when you feel curved and broke a rule."

- end -

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