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#not many people would be able to swipe like 10 different artists' songs and make them sound the exact same
pharahsgf · 20 days
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also what's up with the current epidemic of soulless edm slash dance pop regurgitations of beloved classics? did some producers just wake up one day and say yeah let's make gangsta's paradise except bad and about nothing? did the logical song really need to be remade with some nightcore'd white girl and a bass drop? are there actually people out there who would rather hear ava max mumble her way through whenever wherever than listen to shakira's iconic original? did we run out of music
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duhragonball · 5 years
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[FIC] Luffa: The Legendary Super Saiyan (💯/?)
BIG 💯th Disclaimer: This story features characters and concepts based on Dragon Ball, which is a trademark of Bird Studio/Shueisha and Toei Animation.   This is an unauthorized work, and no profit is being made on this work by me. This story is copyright of me. Download if you like, but please don’t archive it without my permission. Don’t be shy.
King-Sized 💯th Continuity Note: About 💯decades before the events of Dragon Ball Z.
All 💯 chapters conveniently available here.
[10 October, 234 Before Age.    Planet Archeo.]
"The mighty Blintz!   A warrior of immense power, he went into seclusion to train his body to even greater heights.   The people of Minot VII were to be the first victims on the day he returned.   For years they waited with dread, knowing that it was useless to flee and pointless to fight.  It was said that Blintz gained power from Minotian blood, which was why he always began his campaigns there.   Whether or not those stories are true, the massacres were always fact.   Blintz would cut a swatch across the galaxy, and always start at Minot VII.   Until now."
Ydnar Notro, Illustrious Phyper of Archeo stood up from the head of his conference table and approached a woman seated next to him.   Her wrists and ankles were chained to the chair, and she stared mournfully at the tabletop, even as Notro placed his hand on the back of her head.   To the amazement of the others seated at the table, an image suddenly appeared over the woman's head, large enough to be seen by everyone in the great hall.  
At first, the image seemed to be only abstract swirls of colors, and then it coalesced into the shape of an alien being.   He resembled a humanoid with four arms.   The top of his head was bald, with long red hair hanging from the sides.    His thick eybrows and beard, also red, concealed most of his face, save for the bloodthirsty gleam in his eyes, and the contemptuous sneer evidenced by his nose.   His body was stout and covered with metallic armor.   In one hand he held a cudgel, adorned with cruel spikes on one end, and a length of chain on the other.    His large boots were covered with dried blood.
"An artist's representation of Blintz," Notro explained.   "My artist.   Uchida here comes from Planet Abaj, where the people possess thoughtforms that can manifest certain abilities.   Her own thoughtform is capable of creating images directly from her own imagination, and translating them into digital format.    Observe."
Suddenly, the image of Blintz seemed to be pulled into a small computer terminal on the table.   A moment later, the same image appeared on a viewscreen mounted on the wall behind Phyper Notro’s chair.
"Uchida's never seen Blintz, of course.   Fortunately, her ability also allows her to adapt the imaginings of others through telepathic contact.   What you see before you is an image she created based on my own memories of reports and accounts of what Blintz used to look like.   Let me show you what he looks like today..."
Uchida closed her eyes tightly as she worked, and when she was finished, the onlookers saw a very graphic representation of Blintz's corpse.    His red mane had been burned away, leaving only a few singed hairs on his face and head.   One of his right arms was bent and twisted at an awkward angle, indicating a broken bone.   There were dents in his armor, many of which resembled impressions made by humanoid fists.   In the center of his thick torso was a hole three inches in diameter.    He was lying in a pool of his own blood, his fearsome cudgel broken into pieces and scattered beside him.
"Blintz emerged from his seclusion and met his match," Notro explained.    "The Legendary Super Saiyan was waiting for him, and this was the result of that encounter."
He withdrew his hand from Uchida's head and turned to his viewscreen.   With a swipe of his hand, the display changed to reveal charts and photographs from his files.  "I despise legends," he went on.   "They've a kernel of truth to them, hidden behind layers upon layers of rumor and hearsay.   The facts are clear: no ordinary Saiyan could accomplish what Luffa has done.    In less than five years, she... or he... has managed to alter the balance of power in this galaxy.   The Federation was once an assortment of planets constantly warring amongst themselves.   Now, they stand united as a major power to rival the Camelian Empire.   Planet Saiya lies completely deserted.   Luffa's own people had seemed on the verge of a diplomatic and cultural renaissance, and now their kingdom has vanished without a trace.   Monsters and tyrants across the galaxy lie dead and defeated on a thousand worlds.   An army of Saiyans couldn't have managed all of this.  So I believe that the Super Saiyan truly is an invincible warrior.    That seems to be the only detail that I can believe, but it isn't enough!   I need more!"
"Is that why you brought us here, Mr. Phyper?" asked one of the men sitting at the table.    "You've paid each of us a king's ransom to come here, but you've hardly explained what it is you expect us to do.    Honestly, with the resources at your disposal, it's hard to imagine you needing help from anyone."
"Imagination is precisely what I need from all of you!" Notro replied.   "Yes, I have wealth, and power, and agents who can enforce my will in almost every way imaginable.  Uchida is a perfect example of the range of my influence.    When I decided I wanted permanent access to her talents, I simply arranged to have her brought to me.    Archeo doesn't command the vast territory of the Camelian Empire or the Federation, but our enemies know better than to underestimate my domain.   And I have maintained this prestige by knowing my enemies.    What they can and cannot do, and more importantly, when they will or will not strike.   I knew the Abaji government would not dare to fight to retrieve Uchida, because her planet's leaders would never risk a war for a single citizen.   What is an artist next to the survival of their entire world?    I knew their answer before they did, and that was how I was able to act so boldly."  
He snapped his fingers and a servant girl approached the table with a goblet, and stood patiently as she waited for him to drink it.   She was dressed in a brown uniform, with a headscarf concealing her scalp, and a sheer veil obscuring her eyes.   Other women in similar dress served refreshments to the rest of the group at the table.
The problem with Luffa is that I can't even be certain that the Super Saiyan is an enemy or not.    I only know that she could destroy my domain easily, but I don't know what would drive her to do it.   I need to understand her motives, so that I can avoid her wrath or direct it at a more satisfactory target."
"But we're only writers, Mr. Phyper," said another of the guests seated at the table.   "Fiction writers, at that.   What can we give you that your spies and informants can't?"
"Inspiration!" Notro answered.  "My intelligence people are useless where Luffa is concerned.  They can only give me bare facts, and only about where the Super Saiyan has been, and what bystanders see and think.    I need someone who can connect all the rumors and speculation into a coherent narrative, one that will reveal the kernel of truth behind the legend.   That is why I've brought you here to my stronghold.   The fifteen of you are the most acclaimed science-fiction/fantasy authors in the galaxy.     I have provided Uchida, to lend illustration for your imaginings.    Before this night is over, I plan to understand Luffa completely.   Now, begin!"
*
[Hal Ruthefordium, author:  The Builder's Song Pentalogy]
"Everything I've heard about the Super Saiyan is contradictory.    No one can even agree on her gender.   She's a Saiyan, but not a Saiyan, and her tactics and missions seem completely at odds with everything we know about that warrior race.   A lot of people insist that she's an alien posing as a Saiyan, but what would be the point of doing that?   No one trusts the Saiyans as it is, and even if the deception were useful, half of the galaxy has decided that they've seen through it.  
"I think the key here is to embrace all these contradictions.   The universe isn't as black and white as we might like to think.   Quantum mechanics teaches us that much, so why not a quantum Saiyan?   Suppose we're talking about an alien and a Saiyan merged into one?   Perhaps one is female and the other male, or their union allows some sort of genderfluidity.  Well, let me show you."  
He stood up and approached Uchida's seat, and tentatively placed his hand on the back of her head.    "Am I doing  this right?    Yes?  All right then.  The Saiyans themselves are walking contradictions.  They can transform from humanoids into giant apes, and a lot of the lore I've read comes from sources that couldn't seem to keep those forms straight.    How do they transform?   Moonlight, of course.   But not sunlight, which doesn't make sense, seeing as moonlight is nothing but sunlight reflected off the surface of a moon.   What's the difference?"
Unchida winced, and then an image appeared of a Saiyan woman being bathed in golden radiation.    This changed into a new image, showing the woman struggling as she was engulfed in what looked like glowing yellow syrup.   Finally, Uchida showed a third image, with the woman's form completely covered in a glowing golden skin, her face altered from what it had looked like before.
"See, I'm thinking there could be an alien presence in the Saiyan's body.    Not a corporeal life form, but a creature of living energy, that encountered a Saiyan while she was looking at the full moon.    They merged together-- maybe accidentally-- or perhaps the alien was curious about matter-based life forms.    A Saiyan's body metabolizes moonlight to increase their mass, so maybe the alien's energy was metabolized into something else.    The result is a creature of two minds, and conflicting agendas.    Maybe people think she's a man because sometimes the masculine side is more dominant, or vice-versa.  Well, it's a thought, anyway.   They're stuck like this, or maybe they see it as a partnership.   At any rate, their joint actions would be a mixture of their separate natures.   One side being carnal and violent, the other noble and curious."
**
[Dubnium D. D. Durkshire, author: The War of Storms.]
"The pattern I see is one of righteousness," Durkshire said as he thoughtfully stroked his voluminous grey beard.   "Every story I've come across tells of a warrior of immense power who helps those less fortunate, because let's face it, to someone that powerful, almost everyone is less fortunate.    Forget the Saiyan part of the equation and think about what it means to be super.   We're like sheep to such a being.    He can either slaughter us all or he can become a shepherd, and use his gifts to make the world a better place."
He approached Uchida and placed his hand on the back of her head, muttering an apology for the inconvenience, and within seconds the image was there for all to see.    A humanoid man with ape-like features, wearing in a yellow dogi, surfing through the skies on top of a cloud.   In one hand, he held a staff, while his free hand pointed at the setting sun in the distance.  
"Maybe that's a bit too fantastic," Durkshire said after looking at the image for a moment.  "Maybe something more like this..."
Uchida worked again, and the image that appeared above her swirled and reshaped itself into a new figure.   It was still a man, but this time he wore a black bodysuit covered with a gold toga and matching boots and gloves.    A visored helmet covered his head and eyes.   He was posing awkwardly in front of a pile of colorful villains which he had just defeated in battle.
"Hmm... Well, I'm not sure about the costume, but I think you see what I'm trying to say here."  He stepped away from Uchida and shuffled back to his chair.   "To be sure, the Saiyans have a certain reputation for wickedness, but I think we're dealing with a unique situation.   Anyone can turn to righteousness if properly inspired, and I suspect that getting those kinds of enormous powers would inspire almost anyone.   The trick is that he can't be everywhere at once.   How do you use those immense powers for the best?   He would have to pick his battles very carefully.    I think you must have someone very cautious about where and how they spend their time, so as not to miss a greater opportunity when it comes around.     This isn't someone who would fool around with bank robbers, not when there are terrible monsters and merciless warlords lurking in so many dark corners of the galaxy."
"Then you don't think the Super Saiyan would trouble Phyper Notro at all, then," Ruthefordium asked.
"No, I don't," Durkshire said.   "He defeated Blintz because he represented a clear and present danger to billions of people.   If you want to avoid the Super Saiyan's wrath, I'd say that's the key.   Don't threaten large populations.    But anything less than that?   Well, he has bigger fish to fry."
***
[Ernst Seaborgium, author: Dethkyll vs. Eliminator Rex: Requiem -- The Falling Star Crisis: The Search for Lady Dethkyll]
"That's too simplistic.    A hero doesn't have to be so pure.    What if he was once a terrible villain, and the power changed him?"
Seaborgium stood up and nudged Durkshire aside so that he could take his turn with Uchida's power.    Unlike the others who went before, he used both hands, using his second hand to somewhat inappropriately caress the back of her neck.
The resulting image showed another man in a bodysuit, though his expression was far more sinister.   His golden hair floated from his scalp like a crown
"I'm thinking he might have started out as a great conqueror," he said,  "but when he achieved this kind of power, he found that ordinary plundering couldn't hold his interest.   So he started looking for other conquerors that could challenge him."
He glanced down at Uchida and said:  "No, no, he needs to be more muscular.    Do it again."
She complied, and the image floating over the table changed, making Ernst's vision of the Super Saiyan look bigger and stronger than before.  
"He's seen how far raw power takes him, and now that he's fought other brutal conquerors, he's forced to look back on his own evil deeds.    Over time, his quest for worthy sport will become a search for redemption.   How many monsters must he slay to make up for the monster he once was?"
"It sounds to me," Durkshire said, "like you're just coming at the same idea as me, but from a different vector."
"Not at all," Seaborgium insisted.   "Your 'hero of light' tries to use his power wisely, like a philanthropist trying to keep a charity from going over budget.   My version is more selfish than that.   He does the right things for the wrong reasons.   He wants the best fights, first and foremost.   If he could save a billion people from a ferocious monster, he'd do it, but he would fight that same monster even if no lives were on the line.    If a billion people were dying of starvation, he might abandon them to fight a war to save a paltry million."
"I see," Durkshire said.    "Well, that'd change things, wouldn't it?"
"That's just for openers," Seaborgium continued.    "What's he do when he's hungry, or if he wants some company in the bedroom?   He might save your planet, but he wouldn't think twice about helping himself to some spoils.   Even if he did turn over a new leaf, old habits die hard, and even a good man can turn to iniquity with enough temptation."
He decided to try to use Uchida's powers once more, and generated an image of his Super Saiyan lying on an expensive looking bed, flanked by a pair of attractive alien women.   He smiled and chuckled with approval.
"Hey, this lady's pretty handy," Seaborgium said as he patted the top of Uchida’s head.  
****
[Bilbo Bohrium, author: Timmy Titmouse and the Funderful Fortress of Whimsy.]
As Seaborgium and Durkshire chattered about Uchida's powers, Bilbo Bohrium cleared his throat to speak.   He was small by humanoid standards and his bare feet didn't quite touch the floor from his chair.  
"I say, why should he be a hero of any sort?" he asked.   "I reckon that sort of power would drive a person insane.   We're going on about motives and patterns, but perhaps there isn't any to be found.     The Super Saiyan just goes on these mad rampages, and woe be to anyone who gets in the way."
Bohrium shooed the others away from Uchida and they went back to their seats.    With some effort he barely managed to reach Uchida, touching the tip of his index finger to the base of her skull, and a few seconds later she created a new image, one of a hulking brute, screaming as he charged an energy blast with his left hand.  Behind him, a comet loomed over the horizon of the wasteland he stood upon, suggesting that he would soon meet his doom unless he noticed it in time.
"Hal had a whale of a point, though," Bohrium added.    "I mean, when he said there are a lot of contradictions in the eyewitness accounts.  I was thinking that maybe that's a feature, and not a bug.   This person clearly has the means to travel through space.   He isn't just traipsing about, slaughtering nonstop.   There must be a cooldown period where he's lucid enough  that he can charter a spaceship and move on to another place."
He used Uchida once again, and this time the image showed the same Saiyan brute, only much smaller in build.   He was curled up in a fetal position on the floor of a passenger transport, staring into space.   Clumps of his black hair lay around his head, suggesting that he had ripped them out in his distress.  
"To answer Phyper Notro's question," Bohrium went on, "maybe Luffa's motive is a lack of motive.   We can't predict what the Super Saiyan will do because even he has no idea until it happens."
"But if you're right," Ruthefordium said, "All you'd need to do is figure out his itinerary, and attack his ship while he's powerless to defend himself."
"Yeah, I suppose that'd be your only chance," Bohrium agreed.   "Otherwise, there's no telling when or where he might snap, and once that happens, well it's just too bad, isn't it?    Still, at least some of the time,  he'd be docile, maybe even manageable.   Gives you a bit of room for negotiation, at least."
*****
[Colby F. Hassium, author: Shadow's Edge]
"No, let's not forget the Saiyan part of the equation.  Dismissing this as some alien or mythical creature misses the point.  It's a Saiyan legend about a Saiyan warrior.  Why call them 'Super Saiyans' if they aren't?"
Colby Hassium was a tall, thin woman from the Stikkles Cluster.  When she rose from her chair, it was with an air of royalty, though she might have found such a comparison to be beneath her.  
The others were flustered by her statement.   "But the hair, and the powers--!" Rutherfordium protested.
"Yes, they may be beyond other Saiyans," she said, "but why assume that they no longer resemble their kin?  What if they represent the quintessence of everything the Saiyans represent in the universe?"
"And what would that be?" Phyper Notro asked pointedly.
"A savage killer, more violent and terrible than anything we've ever known," she replied.  "Instead of pillaging cities or nations, the Super Saiyan would ravage entire star systems, looting and conquering without end.  Where his brothers merely lust for battle, he would be obsessed with it, almost to the point of addiction.  He would demand tributes of food, treasure, and women."
"Women?" Bohrium asked.    "According to the accounts I've read, the Saiyans rarely take prisoners."
"How naive," she said.  "Naturally, the Super Saiyans would rape their female captives.  All males are driven by the same basic urge to mate.  It's simple evolutionary biology.  Saiyan men being even more bestial and cruel, the Super Saiyan's urge to force himself on women would be insatiable.  He would be unable to think of anything else.  All that raw, elemental power, completely unchecked by the trappings of civilization... there would he no limit to the atrocities he would leave in his wake."
"You sound almost thrilled by the notion," Phyper Notro observed.  
"And why shouldn't I be?" she replied.  "My stories are popular because they confront the brutal truths of power without restraint.  My readers enjoy the glimpse into the psyche of someone who would do horrible things.  The Super Saiyan is the ultimate example of that principle.  A man who can defeat any enemy, take anything he desires, anyone he desires, and answer to no one but his own depraved mind."
She put her hand on Uchida's head and created an illustration of her interpretation of the Super Saiyan.    It was a horrific sight to behold, and most of those seated at the table chose to look away instead.    The Saiyan in the image was covered in blood, and surrounded by mutilated corpses.    Kneeling before him was a blue-haired woman presenting a crate of treasure before him.   The way he touched her chin and the ravenous look in his eyes suggested that he had other ideas.    
******
[Meitnerium Smith, author: The Unhumanoid Situation.]
"What a load of crap!"
Meitnerium Smith smelled of petroleum oil and an unmet need for a shower.   As his seat was located next to Uchida's he didn't bother to get up.    Instead, he simply reached out to the woman, uncurling the long, boneless forearms he normally kept concealed in his jacket.  
Uchida's thoughtform went to work almost immediately after he made contact with her.    A moment later, an image appeared of a Saiyan man clad only in linen breeches.   He was perched in the branches of some enormous tree, his muscular limbs tensed and ready to strike at any moment.    The eager grin on his lips was belied by a sober, almost thoughtful look in his dark eyes.    
"A savage, yes," Smith said, "but not an amoral bully!  Maybe being apart from civilization would make him less cruel, not more!  A wild animal is only violent when threatened.  Otherwise, they carry themselves with a special kind of dignity, untainted by so-called 'modern society'.  The Super Saiyan might be the noblest being in the universe, precisely because he embraces the wildness that we all repress and deny.   I envision him as in perfect harmony with nature.  His power makes him immune to the fears and threats that define others.  If he wears clothing at all, it must be simple raiment, made of vines and leaves, or animal skins colored with ochres and charcoal, like his ancient ancestors once wore."
"You make him sound like a throwback," Phyper Notro said.
"He's come full circle," Smith corrected.  "We all carry genetic memories passed down from our ancestors.   Luffa simply tapped into those memories somehow, unlocking the knowledge of some distant ancestor, a warrior of greater purity than any living in this benighted era.   By attaining this invincible power within himself, he's learned the Great Secret that we 'civilized folk' forgot when we began to huddle around fires.  But instead of driving him mad, the revelation makes him gentle and nurturing.  His only enemies are those foolish enough to resist his primordial wisdom."
"If he's so primitive," Durkshire asked, "then how does he manage to travel from planet to planet?"
"Time and space are but illusions," Smith replied.   "Given the proper frame of mind, a being could be anywhere at any time with less than a footstep.   Perhaps the Super Saiyan learned this frame of mind from his ancient forebears, or he just used a spaceship like everyone else.   I never said he couldn't use technology, Mr. Durkshire.   I'm saying that he isn't corrupted by the society that created it."
"But if you're right, and there is some ancient wisdom that was long since forgotten," Bohrium pointed out, "then that would mean everyone must have possessed Super Saiyan powers at some point in the distant past."
"Maybe so," Smith said with a shrug.  "In that case, I'd say that enlightened folk had the collective decency not to abuse that kind of might.    Or perhaps the powers you're speaking of have been exaggerated by the stories."
*******
[W. Cole Darmstadtium, author: Spake the Flames of Infinity.]
"Why stop there?  If we're questioning her power, perhaps her entire reputation is a fabrication as well!"
Darmstadtium held out his hands in a gesture that seemed to suggest he had figured out the whole thing.   He scooted out his chair and walked over to Uchida's seat.
"I see an opportunist," he said, his antennae twitching excitedly.    "Saiyan or not, whoever is behind the Luffa phenomenon is exploiting the public fascination with mighty warriors and epic heroes.    They believe what they want to believe, and she feeds into their cravings.
He approached Uchida and when he touched the back of her head, she produced an image of a young woman who looked more like a pop star than a Saiyan warrior.   She flashed a smile at a crowd of adoring fans, while in the background an army of faceless soldiers marched into battle to fight in her name.  
"It's a perfect public relations stunt.  Whoever's behind it all sits behind a desk somewhere, pulling all the strings.  When Luffa wages war, they call in an army to fight in her name.  When she dabbles in politics, they call in diplomats and statesmen.  When she appears in public, they hire some felinoid actress with a charming smile to wear a glowing wig and an anti-gravity belt.  All the while, the real Luffa is sitting in a boardroom, chuckling quietly as her machinations translate into profits somehow."
"Public relations for what?" Smith asked.   "Who would bother with such an elaborate deception?   If ‘they’ have this kind of power, why not just use it openly?"
"Oh, you're a passable writer, Meitnerium-- Can I call you Meitnerium?-- but you don't know the first thing about marketing," Darmstadtium replied.   "Corporations don't always benefit by putting everything under one brand.   Sunny Skies Eggs and Earwig Meats are owned by the same company, but they don't necessarily want you to think about that.    That way, if Sunny Skies gets bad publicity, the meat business is relatively insulated.    You said it yourself: You consider the Super Saiyan to be pure and noble.   An enlightened savage possessed of ancient wisdom.  If she's just a mascot for a trade consortium, that glowing fantasy falls apart.    Her wars aren't heroic crusades, but proxy wars financed by ruthless profiteers."
He pointed at the girl in the image.  "This is a face people will look up to.    These," he moved his finger to the soldiers in the background, "are the side of war that the public doesn't like to think about when they're deciding what brand of eggs to buy.    So you hide the army behind the girl, and you name her anything besides 'Sunny Skies', and you mitigate your risks.  The rest, as they say, is legend."
********
[Arthur X. Roentgenium, author: Dauphin's Precipice, a Slab Bulkhead Adventure]
"That's much too cynical.   There has to be some truth to the legends, or why else would they be told at all?"
Arthur Roentgenium was an old man by the standards of his species, and he had the wrinkles and white hair to prove it.    Even so, his face and his body language still clung to the idea of a young man's enthusiasm and vigor.    
"Now suppose it was all real.   What if they only call her a Saiyan because that's the closest thing to a description they can manage?   There are thousands of religious texts that refer to supernatural beings, and the descriptions almost always resemble a patchwork of different animals.   The head of a lion, the tail of a scorpion, eyes like hot coals, and so on.   Why not the form of a man and the tail of an ape?"
He went around the table until he arrived at Uchida's seat, then placed his hand on her head, and the image that formed was one of a vaguely humanoid figure, with multiple faces that seemed to overlap one another.    The figure was circumscribed by a number of glowing golden rings, and plumes of fire shaped like wings floated behind their back.   A disembodied eye was positioned just behind the figure's head, shining like a radiant halo.     A fiery tail hung near the being's left hip.
"You can't be serious," Phyper Notro said.  
"And why not?" Roentgenium replied.   "There's plenty of stories of angels descending from the heavens to mete out divine justice, or to usher in the end of creation.    Who's to say we're not witnessing the same thing?   It's all mythology until you're the one living it.    Why don't we try for a more conventional look..."
He put his hand on Uchida's head again, and the image changed, this time showing a figure that was more clearly humanoid.   It was a woman with flaming hair and a monkey's tail to match.    A pair of "wings" were on her back, though these were nearly transparent wisps of golden color in the shape of wings.  The woman was dressed in a long white dress of what appeared to be the finest silk.   And she carried a weighing balance in her right hand.    In her left, she held a sword that appeared to be red hot.    
"This is how they imagine angels on a lot of planets," Roentgenium explained.   "The iconography varies, but the concept is the same.   They are charged with a divine mission, and they do not stop until that mission is complete."
*********
[Copernicium Jones, author: The Vertebrate Conundrum]
"Angels?  Pfah!   Why stop there?"  said Copernicus Jones.    He had already stood up before Roentgenium had a chance to return to his seat.    "Maybe the gods themselves have decided to take matters into their own hands."  
He shooed Roentgenium away, and put his own hand on Uchida's head, mussing her hair in the process.    "The angels have already come and gone, and so have the prophets.   In our arrogance, we mortals failed to heed their warnings, and now they've come to execute their final judgement."
Uchida complied with the whims of his imaginations, and the image that appeared was of an alleyway in a great city.    A single traveler was surrounded by heavily armed soldiers.   It changed, this time showing the soldiers fleeing in terror as the traveler was transfigured into a being of brilliant white light.   Overhead, the night sky was a grim shade of maroon, illuminated by meteors of brimstone raining down over the land.  
"We've all heard the myths of gods posing as mortals, then punishing cities for treating them poorly," Jones explained.    "The Super Saiyan might be that very story playing out for us, only we have no idea what the gods want from us.   Some clergymen might say 'love' or 'piety', but how would they know?   I don't know about the rest of you, but I seriously doubt Planet Wist was decimated because they didn't put enough money in the collection plate!"
"Then what was it?" Phyper Notro asked.   "Why were they made to suffer, and why at that moment?"
"You might was well ask an amoeba to explain why I stepped on an ant," Jones replied.   "Perhaps the reasons are so far removed from our comprehension that we can't begin to guess!   Even if we could understand, what good would it do?   If the Super Saiyan really is the wrath of the Almighty, then we're well past the point of repentance.    You're either with her or against her, and it's entirely up to her which side you're on."
He crossed his arms over his smoking jacket, and laughed.    "Maybe it's not the end of the world, though.   I just remembered an old poem, something about justice striking like lightning.    Some of the wicked are destroyed, but only enough to put the fear of god into the rest of us.    Maybe it's just a warning shot from the heavens.    In that case, maybe the only thing you can do is fear.    
**********
[Zeppen S! Nihonium, author: Finality Friday.]
"What you're describing sounds more like a devil than any god I've ever heard of," Nihonium said.   "Maybe it's not about repentance at all, but deliverance!"
"Meaning what?" Notro asked.
"If we're taking this legend in a religious context, then we should consider the possibility that the Super Saiyan isn't the hero.    A lot of religious mythologies depict a final battle between good and evil, and the villain isn't always obvious to the people.   Think about it.   You have a charismatic, invincible warrior, hailed as a messiah, or a great leader, but what do they really offer society?  It's all temporal power.    Military triumphs, political upheavals, but nothing to enrich the soul."
He went to Uchida's chair and placed three fingers on the back of her head.   The image that resulted showed a woman with gold hair sitting in a chair, looking almost bored, as men in fine clothes waited in line to kneel down and kiss her right hand.  Her bangs were curled in such a way to resemble an arcane symbol of demonic evil.  
"At the time, it seems like the right play," Nihonium explained.   "She's winning, she seems to have all the right answers, and everyone who stands against her is mercilessly cut down.   Joining her only makes sense.    But what's the price?    She can protect you and give you peace and prosperity, but in the end, she owns you, body and soul."    
He threw out his arms, gesticulating wildly with his hands.    "But then!  What happens?   Then the Almighty shows up, and shows the devil what real power is.    She can marshal her forces against the faithful, and it looks like a mismatch, but in the end she’s the one who's doomed.   All her strength and money and weapons are useless.  She's doomed and so is everyone who threw in with her."
He leaned forward and tapped his index finger on the table, with enough force that even those seated on the far end could feel the vibrations.   "That's the key," he said.   "That's what makes it such a compelling story.   The winners are the ones who resist the easy path.   They have to see the strongest cat in the jungle, and decide not to serve her.   They have to fend for themselves and live with the consequences, and in the end, they're finally rewarded for making the right choice."
"So what, then?" Jones asked.   "You're saying all of Luffa's enemies should just... wait for someone even stronger to come along and finish her off?"
"It sounds pretty crazy, but that's what makes it so engaging," Nihonium said.    "It's a reassurance for the weak and the downtrodden, the ones who can't fight for themselves.   All they can do is wait for someone to save them, so the story tells them that it's the smartest possible move."
"That's compelling," Jones said, "Unless Luffa isn't the devil in your analogy.   What if the devil was someone else, and she's already shown up to beat them?    How do you know whose side to be on?"
Nihonium shrugged and smiled.   "Well, that's what different religions have been trying to figure out since the beginning of time, isn't it?"
***********
[Sargon Flerovium, author: Red Arcosia, Blue Arcosia.]
"And that's exactly why I'm an agnostic," Flerovium said.  
"All right, Sargon," Nihonium replied with a laugh.   "What's your version?"
"Not so different from yours, honestly," Flerovium said.    "Manipulative, charismatic, powerful, inspiring, but does she really have to be a supernatural being to fulfill all of those qualities?   There's plenty of charismatic strongmen in the galaxy, and all of them got there without being the literal embodiment of evil." 
He stood up and slowly made his way to Uchida's seat, occasionally stopping to savor another puff on his electronic pipe.    "Let's say she is a woman, not that it really matters.  But not a god or an angel, or even a corporate facade like our friend Cole is proposing.    There are powerful creatures in the universe.    The Saiyans themselves are proof of that.   Whether the Super Saiyan is one of their race or not, it's hardly unnatural for such a creature to exist.   On my own home planet, they thought the South Pole didn't exist until someone went there and found it."
He arrived at Uchida's chair and planted his hands on her shoulders.   "Plausibility.   That's the loamy soil in which legends take root," he continued.   "A Super Saiyan could exist, and could do the things she's said to have done, and so forth.    It isn't about being true; it's about being just possible enough that it can't be immediately dismissed as untrue."
"Then you think Luffa is an elaborate hoax?"  Notro surmised.
"Not quite," Flerovium replied.  He took the e-pipe out of his mouth and began pointing with it, though at nothing in particular.  "I think she's someone powerful enough to seem to be able to do the things she's said, but not powerful enough to have actually done them.   The founder of Ancient Camelia was said to have been nursed by a wild animal.  Now feral children are known to exist, and Camelia certainly was founded, but one doesn't prove the other.    I think this Luffa has taken credit for things that have happened around her.   Perhaps she contributed more than we know, perhaps less, but I believe she was given more credit than she was due, and used it to make herself seem greater than she truly is.    It certainly fits the pattern of the Saiyan ego.   Can they all turn into giant apes, or is it just some of them, while the rest are bluffing?"
"Then you're saying that she has no agenda, beyond her own aggrandizement?"  Notro asked wearily.
"Oh, she may have an end goal in mind," Flerovium said.   "Lining her own pockets, for one.   A mercenary with a reputation can charge more than one without.    But you won't be able to predict her next move based on her last.    She mostly just waits for things to happen, and then inserts herself into the narrative after the fact."
He turned to go back to his seat, then stopped.   "Oh, right, I almost forgot."   With that, he place his hand on Uchida's head and closed his eyes, apparently thinking that would help.  The image that appeared was of a woman raising her hands in triumph, celebrated by her admirers.    This didn't really convey Flerovium's premise very well, nor did he seem to care.
************
[Moscovium Tubal-cain, author: Tanks for the Mammaries! (And Other “””Hilarious””” Stories Based On Cheap Wordplays.)]
"I don't know, I kind of fancy the supernatural angle myself.   The way I've heard it, there's a new Super Saiyan every thousand years.   It reminds me of an old ghost story I heard as a child."
Tubal-Cain carried a copy of his most recent book on his person at all times, just so he would have it ready to promote in case someone happened to take a video recording of him.   In spite of the remote odds of this, he still made sure to hold it as conspicuously as possible while he rounded the table to get to Uchida's seat.  
"I'll try to keep this brief," he said.   "I don't have my watch on me.   You know, I once saw a Saiyan eat a watch.   It was time consuming."  
He was the only one who laughed.   If this discouraged him at all, he didn't show it.  
"I've been thinking, what if the lack of apparent motive is actually a pattern that the rest of us can't understand?   It doesn't have to be part of some religious cosmology.    Maybe it's more like a poltergeist banging on a tin can in the middle of the night.   If the young lady will cooperate...?"
He put his hand on Uchida's head, and an image appeared of a Super Saiyan--such as Tubal-cain imagined one-- fighting a war on an alien planet.   A caption at the bottom announced that this scene took place "thousands of years ago".
"Once upon a time, maybe there was something important on this planet, something a Saiyan might have thought worth fighting for.   Only he lost, somehow."
He put his hand on Uchida's head again, and the scene changed.    It was the same warrior, and the flora on the planet was familiar, but the scene had changed.  
"But his spirit wouldn't admit defeat, and so he haunts this battlefield, trying to win a campaign that was already decided long ago," Tubal-cain explained.  
He used Uchida's power once more, and the image transformed, with the Saiyan still fighting on the same world, only now there was no flora, or any of other sign of life.  
"Civilizations rise and fall, populations move from one planet to another, but the Super Saiyan keeps fighting the same wars, again and again, unaware that anything has changed.    Maybe he possesses a new Saiyan each time he emerges, and assimilates new wars with each iteration, but he still can't let go of the past.   Like a spectre, he haunts the galaxy, a prisoner of time itself."
*************
[Anne Livermorium, author: The Crimson Ratio]
"What about a prisoner of technology?  Not a ghost, but a ghost in the machine."
Anne Livermorium's exoskeletal joints creaked with each step she took around the table.   One hundred fifty-one years old, she lacked the flexibility of younger members of her species, but none of their strength.   And so, when she arrived at Uchida's seat, she simply lifted the Abajian by grabbing one of her shoulders, rather than bending down slightly to reachback of her head.   There was just enough slack on her chains to accommodate this, while Uchida herself made no effort to resist.  
"The Super Saiyan doesn't have to be a vengeful spirit or a demon to be powerful," Livermorium explained.   "She doesn't have to be a ghost to re-emerge every thousand years.   There are androids out there designed to last decades on a single power supply.  Who's to say the Super Saiyan isn't just an android based on Saiyan physiology?"
The image finally coalesced over the table.   At first glance, the figure in the scene looked like a Saiyan woman, but a closer inspection revealed seams running along her bare arms and legs.   Some of these seams were opened in places, with dark grey cables inserted into the opening.    These led to a variety of grim devices in the Saiyan's surroundings.   One of her eyebrows was adorned with a silver object that followed the curvature of her orbital bone, and the eye it surrounded glowed a cold, clinical blue.
"Or better yet, a cyborg," Livermorium said.   "Maybe there really is a Saiyan in there, or the remnants of one.    I can't imagine why a Saiyan would willingly subject themselves to such a procedure, but maybe she had no choice.    Maybe someone did this to her, and she's been lingering on ever since."
Still holding Uchida, she used her power once more, this time creating an image of the same Saiyan character wreaking havoc in an amusement park.    She was dressed in civilian clothing: a jacket, skirt, and dark leggings.  Aside from the destructive power she was unleashing in this scene, there was no obvious indication that she was anything but an ordinary tourist.
"It's a cycle.   Every thousand years, she awakens and goes on a rampage.   or what we would call a rampage.   To her, it might make perfect sense, or perhaps her programming is corrupted.   Or maybe she's just bored.  Everything that appealed to a flesh-and-blood Saiyan would have become pointless to her after the first few centuries.   She doesn't know what to do with herself, and she's running out of answers.   Toppling nations and routing armies is the closest thing to amusement she can find.    Then it all... stops.
"I think this is the part that interests me the most, actually.   Not the Super Saiyan part of the legend, but the thousand-year gap in between.    What's going on during those intervals?    It can't be a new Saiyan every time.   What are the odds of only one Super Saiyan birth every thousand years on the dot?  No more, no less?   And while I like the rest of your ideas, I don't see how an alien or supernatural explanation fits either.    A demon decides to menace the mortal world, or a vengeful god passes judgment on us, but only on a strict timetable?    Once a milennia, like clockwork?   I don't claim to understand how God thinks, but I doubt She uses our calendars, or anyone else's, for that matter.
"But maybe the reason it's like clockwork is because it really is a clock.   The Super Saiyan runs loose for a while, then she starts to burn out.   Maybe the power supply needs recharging, or her mechanical parts can only handle so much strain.   Let's suppose some ancient, advanced civilization created the technology that makes her run, and it has self-repair systems, and a self-renewing energy source.   She can rejuvenate herself, but it takes a long time."
Livermorium used Uchida again, and this time the scene depicted the Cyber-Saiyan lying dormant in a darkened room.   Her eyes were wide open, one of them still glowing red.    Parts of her skin had been ripped away, presumably in some great battle.   This revealed mechanical components underneath.   There were skeletal remains beside her, and the amount of dust in the scene indicated that it had been a very long time since she had been disturbed.
"On second thought, maybe the dark centuries are her way of coping with immortality.    Yes, she can't die.    Nothing in the universe is strong enough to destroy her, so she intentionally strains her design to the point where she needs a thousand year nap to recover.   It's not true death, but the closest respite she can find.   Each time, she awakens, desperate to resume her slumber.    The rest of us, in our ignorance, we marvel at her power and wonder about her true nature, but if we knew the truth, we might pity her instead."
**************
[Tennessine Ernie  Ford, author: The Sixteenth Ton]
"A machine?   I could see that, but not the kind with circuits and motors."  
Ford left a trail of viscous liquid behind his long dark robe as he moved.   Even by the dim firelight of the candles and hearth, one could track his path from the entrance of the hall to his chair.   Now, as he stood and moved around the table, he left a new trail, accompanied by the clack of his shoes on the stone floor, and the squish off his feet inside of his shoes.
"I consider myself to be more spiritual than religious," he said, oblivious to the cliche of that sentiment.  "I study comparative religion as a hobby, and more often than not, I find certain cycles, themes that show up in multiple mythologies from an assortment of planets.   Floods are a well-known example.    Just about every mythology has a flood story.   Even some of the desert planets have them.     Many creation myths also share--"
"Get to the point, Ernie," Flerovium called out.    
"All right, all right.   Patience, children," he said.   "The point, aside from the one on Sargon's head-- little joke there-- is that so many of these myths and legends attempt to explain grand phenomena in nature, but the storytellers only think that these are grand wondrous things.    Floods, sunrises, the changing of the seasons, they happen everywhere, routinely.    From a galactic standpoint, they're mundane.   He finally reached Uchida and placed one of his three hands on the back of her head.   "Lucky thing I don't have to use my feet for this," he chuckled.   "Otherwise, it might make a mess."
The image that sprang from Uchida's thoughtform was of a starfield, with a lone figure streaking through the void like a speed skater sliding across an invisible plane of ice.   In her wake was a gleaming yellow trail, like a comet's tail, only crackling with energy.     She held her arms out in front of her, fingers outstretched, as though she were desperate to reach out and touch her unknowable destination.  
"Yes, yes, we all know about your speed skater fetish,  Ernie," Flerovium heckled again.    "I don't think Phyper Notro is lending us his private artist to add to your personal collection."
"Well, I suppose no illustration would really do the idea justice," Ford said.   "Or rather, no imagination could do it justice.   What I'm talking about is a cosmic phenomenon, as inevitable as a flood or hurricane, but on a universal scale.   Just as our ancestors personified concepts they couldn't comprehend--a man in the sky who makes it rain, a woman in the ground who makes plants grow--so we too are unable to perceive these cosmic manifestations as anything more than avatars.    That's why the accounts are so varied.   No one can agree on the Super Saiyans species or sex, but the Saiyan part of the description always remained.   It's not a Saiyan at all, of course, but that's what everyone sees when they look at it in action.  It's no different from how we think of gravity as a tug from an imaginary rope, or a depression in the fabric of space.  We look at this force and our minds, unable to process it, interpret it as a Saiyan."
"You call it a force, Ernie," Meitnerium Smith said.   "A force for what?"
Ford shrugged.   "Destruction, maybe.    Perhaps she's the universe's expression of violence.   Not a 'god' of violence, or anything like that.    I mean violence personified, or destruction personified, or whatever.    That's why it's impossible to defeat her.    She can't lose.   She doesn't know how.    One might as well ask a tornado to kindly come again another day.    No, you're better off seeking shelter and riding out the storm."
***************
[Roy Oganesson, author: Mondo Cool, A Novel.]
"No, it's too abstract," Oganesson said.  "A force of nature I can see, but you're taking the soul out of the legend.  If it's not a person at all, then what's the point?"
As he rose from his seat, his prosthetic leg whirred and clicked quietly beneath his pant leg.  He was seated very close to Uchida, but he insisted on taking the long way around.   He limped for most of the way, and those close to him knew that it was due to injuries in his real leg, rather than any malfunction in the mechanical one.  
"It's a lovely castle, Mr. Phyper," he said as he took in the scenery.   "A bit gloomy for my tastes, and a little too drafty for my joints, but just the setting for a true crime yarn.   Now then, where was I?"
He touched Uchida's head, and the image that resulted from their contact showed a Saiyan male, leading a crowd of other Saiyans onward.   He pointed triumphantly into the foreground, leaving the destination of their journey for the viewer to speculate.    
"I'm just thinking that the reason the Super Saiyan doesn't quite line up with the reputation of other Saiyans is because he's not meant to be like his brothers.  Maybe the Saiyans themselves don't realize who he is.    It's the same with many visionaries and revolutionaries.   The truly special ones often go underappreciated."
He looked to the others.  "Now, when I say 'special', I don't mean supernatural, or paranormal, or metaphysical.   Maybe that does play into it, but I think there's plenty of room for wonder in mortal beings.   Whoever founded the Camelian Empire was special, even if they didn't get raised by wild animals.    The woman who invented the superluminous drive was special, even if she didn't predict the Third Hyperspace War like the stories say.   The fellow who realized that benzene molecules have a ring structure, he was a genius regardless of whether he actually dreamed of a snake eating its tail.   I think the Super Saiyan is cut from the same cloth.
"As far as what he's meant to do, I couldn't say.   I don't understand the Saiyan people well enough to even guess at what they need, and they probably don't even know themselves.    But I think Luffa's destiny is to meet that need, to give them whatever they've been lacking until now.    It might not be a pleasant transaction.   They say a starving man has difficulty eating because his stomach isn't used to dealing with food.  Babies cry when they're born, and I don't think it's because they're grateful to be free of a womb that met their every need.   The Saiyans may not know it's for their own good at first, but one day they'll look back on Luffa and thank him for whatever he's done."
****************
"Enough!" Phyper Notro suddenly shouted.  "None of this is telling me anything!  I expected some common truth to emerge, but your stories are all completely contradictory!    How many different interpretations of one Saiyan can there be?!"
"As many as there are storytellers," Durkshire replied.  "You asked us to speculate, and there's plenty of room for that.  As a matter of fact, listening to some of the others gave me some new ideas of my own that--"
"Get out!" Notro screamed.  "All of you!  This was a fool's errand from the start, and I won't indulge it any longer!"
"That's your choice, Mr. Phyper, but my agent was very clear about the terms of our contract, and I'm thinking that goes for the others you invited--"
"Yes, yes," Notro growled.  "You'll be paid.  I hardly need anyone to explain your motivations to me."  He turned to his servant and barked:  "Make the arrangements, and see to it they get off this planet as quickly as possible."
The hooded woman suddenly crossed her arms over her chest.  "Do it yourself," she said.
Most of Notro's guests paid little attention to her defiance, though a few of the more curious writers slowed down or stopped to watch the drama unfold.  
"What did you say to me?!" Notro roared.
"Maybe you have a contract with them," she said, pointing her thumb at the crowd of writers, "but not me."
"You forget your place, lackey!" Notro snarled.  He rose from his chair and grabbed her by the face, squeezing the arrogant smirk out of her lips.  "The terms of your indenture were very clear, including the penalties for insubordination!  But if you need a reminder, I'm more than willing to demonstrate personally.
He raised his other hand to strike her, but before he could bring it down again, he was knocked backward by a force powerful enough to send him tumbling over the table and onto the other side.
By now, the scene had captured the everyone's attention.  The writers who hadn't already left now stood transfixed, or circled around for a better vantage.  
The servant hadn't moved her arms, but her robes had come apart, and a furry tail now emerged from her cloak.  Once Phyper Notro rose to his feet, he spotted it too, and then he saw the woman remove her hood, revealing a head of short, unkempt hair.
"I was waiting for you to give me a turn, Mr. Phyper," she said with a cruel smile.  "I didn't need a picture, though.  I've already got one."
She ripped the robes off of her body, revealing a black, sleeveless shirt and loose yellow pants.  She reached into one of her pants pockets and unrolled a piece of paper, which bore a sketch of a woman with glowing yellow hair.  
"Not a bad likeness, huh?" she asked as she showed him the drawing and then pointed to her own face.
"You...!" Notro said as the color drained from his face.
"I get a lot of fan mail," Luffa said.  "Sometimes, they draw pictures of me, which was kind of weird to me at first.   Some of it doesn't always look much like me, but it's not like I stand around in one place for very long.   This one kid sent me a thing where I was dressed in red, and I couldn't figure it out.   Then I read the letter attached, and he said my clothes were soaked in 'monster guts', and that was awesome.   Kid's probably got a Saiyan or two in his family tree."
"Don't... don't just stand there!" Notro shouted to his guards.     "Kill her!"
The guards managed to draw their firearms and advance three steps before Luffa raised her clenched fist, and they were all knocked down by an unseen force.
She approached Notro slowly, as if the altercation with the guards had never even happened.  She gestured to the picture in her hand.   "Now this one, it didn't stand out much at first, but my friends thought it looked a lot like me.   One friend in particular... well, she used to handle all my fan mail before she... before she died.   I finally went through some of her things, and I found this.  She must have printed out a copy to hang on to."  
Notro backed away from the table, but the hall was only so big, and there was only so far he could go.  
"I don't normally write back to anybody, but I thought I should say something.   Only when I finally sent my reply, I found out Uchida was missing.   I made a few calls, and it didn't take me long to figure out that you were behind it.   Maybe that's why you were so nervous about me coming after you someday.  You probably heard I was asking about you, but you didn't know why."
She circled around the table, kicking over Notro's chair as she passed by, and made her way to Uchida's seat.    There, Luffa snapped the chains like they were made of paper.
"Sorry for dragging this out for so long," Luffa said to her.   "I had to play it carefully in case he tried to use you as a hostage.    Are you okay?"
"Yes," Uchida said.    "It's just... you're much shorter than I expected."
"I get that a lot," Luffa said with a laugh.   "Listen, are you hungry?   I've got some Abajian shark eggs on my ship.   Thought I'd make omelets for dinner."
"You cook?" Uchida asked.
Luffa shrugged.   "Never tried Abajian ingredients before, so we'll see how it goes.   First thing's first, though."
She looked back at Notro, who had picked up a candelabra in a desperate attempt to arm himself.
"I'm shutting you down, Mr. Phyper," Luffa said.   "I've seen how you treat your prisoners and your subordinates, and it kind of pisses me off."
"Wait!" Notro said.   "You have the girl!  Just take her!  We don't have to fight--!"
"Now see, that's exactly what Blintz said when he realized he couldn't beat me," Luffa said.   She began cracking her knuckles.   "But he still gave me a decent workout.   I'm thinking your military could amuse me for an hour or so.   Either way, by the time I'm finished with your planet, the next Phyper will know better than to go around kidnapping people to get free art."
"That... that's insane!" Notro said.    "You came all this way over an old scrap of paper, and now you want to fight a war when you've already won?"
"What's wrong, Mr. Phyper?" Luffa asked.   "You said you wanted to know the truth behind the legend."  
She tensed up and her entire body glowed with an ethereal yellow flame.     Her black hair turned bright gold, and her eyes burned green.   Notro felt his knees going weak, and as he dropped to the floor he found that he couldn't look away from Luffa as she glared down at him.  
"Well," she said gravely, "now you know."
NEXT: The Jindan Way
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almonstro-blog · 6 years
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From A’s and B Flats to Ones and Zeros: Injecting Technology into Today’s Music
Most millennials will never know the glory of unwrapping that CD that they have waited in line all night to buy on release day, nor will they feel the crushing defeat when the cassette player in the station wagon finally eats their favorite mix tape.  Nowadays, we can seamlessly move our favorite songs from the office to the car or from our jog to the patio with the swipe of a finger.  Musicians who once needed a pile of money and experienced engineers to record an album can now record everything on a laptop in mom’s basement. This is the digital revolution, and technology seems to be moving at an exponential rate. With recent advancements in technology along with a little help from a few key innovations, the past twenty years has changed the way we write, record, and listen to music today.
Looking back to October of 2001, a struggling company by the name of Apple decided to swing for the fences. Co-Founder and then CEO Steve Jobs announced a small personal music device called an iPod, which he believed could compete with personal CD players as a mobile device used to store and play music.  The key difference with this player is that it could take digitally compressed music files and store many more songs on the hard drive, saving consumers the hassle of carrying all their CD’s around with them.  This technology would allow the freedom to bring an entire music library on a device smaller than a pack of cigarettes.  Nobody at the time could imagine the implications that this would bring to the future of the entire tech industry.
           Fast forward to 2007, the year of the iPhone, which laid the foundation for the smart phone industry.  Data could be stored and moved quickly, thus creating a transition from personal computers to handheld devices as our primary source of absorbing and dispersing data around the world.   It became much easier to share music peer to peer through the internet, and album sales in the records were falling fast.  Even with the introduction of iTunes, the average consumer would only purchase their favorite songs by an artist rather than entire albums.  This became a primary factor in the way the consumer, and in turn, the music industry evolved to survive these changing times.
           Many musicians could no longer pay the high costs that came along with recording an album.  On the low end, recording costs for a major release could total well over $100,000. With the influx of digital technology came the ability to write and record these albums at a much lower cost. With the improved processing power of computers, a home studio could be built for around $500 and can fit within right on the desk where the computer sits.  This gives any musician the ability to record on a budget, as well as the flexibility to record intermittently when it is convenient or when inspiration strikes.  Every idea can be recorded to a computer the moment that sweet riff hits the stings; which can then be tweaked with drum sounds, horns, or even a full orchestra at the tips of your fingers.  The internet also gave the ability to share recordings or portions of recordings with friends or strangers across the world who could add their own spice to the tune in real time.  With the new additions of Apple’s Garage Band and other mobile recording applications, one could even jot down an idea wherever inspiration may arise using their smart phone.  Any musician can tell you they’ve thought of an amazing idea for a song in the car that has completely evaporated into the ethers of the universe by the time they stepped into the house to grab an instrument.  
           This wasn’t all gravy for the starving artist however.  As the well was beginning to dry up from the struggling labels, even popular artists were finding it difficult to fund their projects with little cash from album sales and downloads making it back to their pockets. Bands found that the only tangible paycheck for their profession had come through merchandising, which was primarily sold at their concerts.  More and more acts would have to tour constantly to keep the lights on, many spending as much as three-hundred days a year on the road.  Luckily, due to the nature of a musician, the became very creative with different marketing strategies beyond selling t-shirts to cashing in on the experience itself, by selling original art or VIP experiences before shows to supplement their income and get them to the next city.  This was not a sustainable lifestyle however for musicians who have families and other responsibilities at home.  The use of technology through the introduction of social media, was a cornerstone for artists attempting to make a living creating the soundtrack to our lives.
           The immediate spark of social media gave artists a medium where they could speak directly to their fans, unadulterated and unfiltered.  There was no boss to tell them what they could or could not say.  From a fan’s perspective, they could follow not only the band, but the intimate details of their lives.  For the first time ever, fans didn’t just know the band member’s names, but what they did on the weekends, when their kids took their first steps, and why they can’t stay out of target for more than 5 days in a row. There was a connection with these artists now, and fans instantly felt tied to the band in a way that had not been experienced before.  The psychology behind these connections is very powerful, and the importance at the time was grossly understated.  
Crowdsourcing, which is a way of collecting money from large groups of individuals, became an integral part of funding albums for independent artists.  Not very many people would buy an album from a stranger before a note was ever recorded.  However, these personal connections (albeit these were still one-way connections) gave fans the sense that they were part of the process, which made donating to these projects an investment.  That’s exactly what was happening, and more and more established artists could start to sever ties with the record lables and go at it alone, reaping the benefits of retaining the profit for themselves as well.
Record labels had thrived for decades on the premise that artists would need promotion as well as financial backing to succeed in the industry.  As time went on and technology advanced, artists became more independent, finding creative ways to succeed in an industry that was shifting as quickly as albums were written.  With the changing environment, record labels who had been suffering financial losses every year weren’t able to sign major talent and in turn many had to close their doors.  The biggest conundrum here was that consumers were listening to as much, if not more music on their phones and computers so there was still money to be had.  This is when new applications such as Spotify, Apple Music, and Pandora stepped in to capitalize on these markets.  What these companies did was to create a subscription based fee structure whereas for a monthly charge of around $10, a listener would be able to stream radio and albums with some of these services, as well giving the ability to download the songs they liked.  It quickly became apparent that services like these became beneficial for both the consumer and the record labels.
           A consumer would have to pay approximately $10 to purchase an album or $.99 per song on iTunes and other online retail platforms.  By paying a subscription fee, one could access a library of millions of songs through online streaming or download as many as their computer or smartphone will allow.  This became advantageous for the listener who would like to grab an album they may not be immediately in love with, or allow them to try new bands or new styles of music that they wouldn’t have been willing to invest in prior.  These services also utilize a vast amount of data the streaming services collect based on what consumers are listening to, while creating algorithms which make it easy to recommend new artists to accurately accommodate to taste.  With the ease and flexibility of these services, popularity has increased to 90 million paid subscribers in 2016, and the record companies are finally cashing in.
           These streaming services initially looked like competition for the record labels, capitalizing on the income that was being lost from physical and digital sales.  As it turns out, 2016 has treated major record labels to the largest profits in the past decade thanks to these services.  Record labels may only receive around a half cent per listen, but with Spotify reporting a billion streams per day, revenue can quickly add up.  This, in conjunction with the reduced costs of recording and advertising, has turned a corner for record companies’ ability to profit and again find and fund new talent.      
Every generation experiences a revolution by way of technological innovation that changes the way we exist. With the creation and expansion of digital technology, we will be lucky enough to experience it first hand, as well as share it with friends, family, and strangers on the same medium that was created for us.  Music has been profoundly affected by technology in the way we write, record, and listen; however music is still the basis of how we communicate universally, an idea as primal as hunting and gathering.  So long may be the days of putting the needle to wax (albeit some of still partake for sport), but the culture of music is cyclical and as Les Guêpes said, “the more things change, the more they stay the same.”  With any major shift in culture, many will struggle to adapt, but at the end of the day our artists are making money again, the record companies are making money again, and we will gladly give it to them for a little inspiration.  
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iamilettswriting · 7 years
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Millennials on Tinder (long article)
Iamilett Picon
March 7, 2017
Millennials on Tinder
Word Count 1,452
 You are sitting in a coffee shop and your phone buzzes once. It is a flirty message from someone who just came across your Tinder profile and could not help but swipe right. Instead of trying to start a conversation with the handsome stranger sitting across the room you cringe at the message on your screen. Of course it’s nice to know someone finds you attractive, but does it count when you do not even know if the person is real?
Millennials’ lack of social skills come from the fact that this generation has grown up on social media and they have learned to connect with people via text better than face-to-face. This lack of social skills is not only affecting millenials in job interviews and their workplaces. Their inability to effectively communicate and express themselves is especially hurting them in the world of dating.
This generation has a long list of amazing personality traits. They are creative, determined to make an impact on the world and interested in social change. However, they are also quite independent. It is not to say millennials are anti-social, necessarily; they are actually quite social. Yet, their ability to communicate with the people around them is lacking. Nowadays, approaching someone at a coffee shop to pay him or her a compliment is perceived as “weird” or “creepy.” People are not used to interacting with one another anymore; at least not to the extent they once did.
Not only can millennials not properly communicate, but also because they are not keen on social interaction, many of them do not know how to act appropriately on a date.  In fact, millenials are paying upward of $75 for etiquette courses. These courses are designed specifically for men and women in their 20s looking to expand their knowledge on date etiquette in hopes of becoming more desirable. During the length
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of one course the participants are taught that, while on a date, body language and eye contact are as important as using the proper utensils and holding a wine glass correctly. Nevertheless, no amount of etiquette courses will change the fact that millennials do not seem interested in meeting potential partners if it is not through an app.
In a recent survey of 20 to 25 –year-old Tinder users, 91 percent of them said they would rather meet someone, for the first time, face-to-face. They claim it would be a better way of feeling out the other person’s “vibe” and getting a sense of what they are really like. This would then help them come to a conclusion about their compatibility, or lack thereof, sooner.
However, several of the survey participants also expressed they simply do not feel comfortable approaching someone if they find them attractive. “Some people don’t have the mental stability to walk up to someone and make the first move,” said one Tinder user who was interviewed. The fear of saying the wrong thing and having to face instant rejection is far too great.
Along the same spectrum, there were participants who believe getting approached by someone who finds them attractive, in person, is “creepy” and “just weird”. Instead people resort to dating apps, such as Tinder, where they can craft their profiles and message responses and completely avoid people with which they do not wish to connect.
Launched in 2012, Tinder is now one of the most popular dating apps in the world. Its simplicity and free features allows users to swipe right (on people they like) or left (on people they do not like) on hundreds of users without putting much effort into their decision-making process. If a user swipes right on someone who has already right-
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swiped him or her, that person will match and be able to communicate via direct message. However, if a user swipes right on someone who has not yet right-swiped him or her there is an equal possibility of the other user seeing them and swiping or just getting lost in the sea of profiles and never seeing the other user again.
Although Tinder is available to anyone from 18 years old to 55-plus years old, the app is most popular among millenials, or those in their 20s and early 30s. Tinder’s website claims they “empower users around the world to create new connections that otherwise might never have been possible.” As of 2016, Tinder’s website also claims their statistics to be as follows: 1.4 billion swipes per day, 26 million matches per day, 10 billion-plus total matches, and the app is available in 196 countries.  
        Due to the nature of messages that are most commonly exchanged on Tinder, there is a social stigma attached to using the app. If a person is asked what Tinder is for, he or she will most likely describe it as a “hookup app,” a place where you can find a one-night stand. And although the earlier survey revealed that 31 percent of users are on the app to find casual sex, 27 percent are actually trying to find a serious relationship; the rest are simply using it as a way to pass the time and boost their self-confidence.  
According to one Tinder employee, who wishes to remain unnamed, Tinder is a place where people can “find love connections, make friends and network.” While that is not true for everyone, Niomi, an ex-Tinder user, was indeed able to find a love connection.
In an interview, Niomi explains joined the world of Tinder in 2015, after a rough breakup, with no intentions. She saw it as a fun game, a self-confidence booster and “just
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expected to talk to some hot guys”. The thought of finding a serious relationship never crossed her mind.
Before meeting in-person, Niomi and her now-boyfriend Anthony were messaging via Tinder for exactly one month.
“Tinder (made) it easier to start the relationship because we had gotten the chance to get to know each other a lot before meeting face to face,” Niomi explains, “I was more comfortable with meeting him in-person the first time just because we had talked so much before our first date.”
Despite having a Tinder success story, Niomi expresses many of the same concerns as the general population does about how the app might be negatively affecting millennials.
“What if you’re talking to someone and they just tell you things you (want to) hear, in person they could be completely different,” she supposes.
Two millennials, Elizabeth and Walter, who just celebrated 10 years of marriage, shared similar thoughts. Although they never used the app, they understand the appeal.
“(People) don’t have to be face to face the first time and feel intimidated,” says Elizabeth, “but that’s how you know if you click or not. It’s a different feeling when you like someone online and in person.”
“People have the idea of connecting but can’t actually connect,” Walter added.
In an effort to make users feel more “connected” to their matches, Tinder is giving people the option to connect their Instagram and Spotify accounts to their profile.
This feature creates the false sense of connectivity by letting people look at their match’s
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life in pictures and by notifying them of any favorite artists they have in common. In reality, looking at some extra pictures and knowing what a person’s current favorite song is does not make you any more likely to fall in love. This is generally how it goes: You meet someone on Tinder, you follow his or her handles on Instagram, Snapchat, maybe Twitter, and then you never meet. Instead of meeting in-person you use those other social media apps to develop a relationship based on the mutual understanding that despite the fact you met on a dating app you do not actually want to date. Then, you end up with a new online friend.
Meeting someone online is more convenient, but less personal. Online you cannot figure out the things about the other person that annoy you and the things about them that make your heart skip a beat.
People are not used to being approached in-person; online is less threatening. Surely a message that reads “sup cutie” will not make your dopamine levels rise as much as they would if someone approached you in-person to tell you that, theoretically in a room full of people, they found you attractive. As one Tinder user explained, “Technology takes away from the experience of actually meeting someone. There’s no ‘spark’ when you're staring at a laptop screen. You can't read someone's body language through a phone call or sense their vibe through a text.”
Maybe it is the fact that millennials are too busy developing startups and rallying for equal rights that is making them settle for the convenience of Tinder. They have hundreds of potential partners who are sitting in their pockets waiting to be judged on a
couple of pictures and the profile they built to make them sound interesting enough to
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talk to but not like they are trying too hard to be noticed. There is no need to go out into the world and actively look for someone to love anymore.
With the rise of online relationships comes the loss of importance given to human communication, which is something that should be far more valued than it currently is.
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avaliveradio · 5 years
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9.30 New Music Monday Release radar with Jacqueline Jax
When an artist creates music, it’s driven from passion. When done effectively, that energy transfers to the listener creating an emotional response. Listening to new music is an experience. Explore some exciting new music from creators all over the world recently discovered by our host Jacqueline Jax as she searches the far corners of the globe for talented songwriters and music creators who are telling their truth to bring the listener a unique experience.  
SUBSCRIBE to our broadcast here: www.wavve.link/avaliveradio
Listen to the Show: https://anchor.fm/ava-live-radio/episodes/9-30-New-Music-Monday-Release-radar-with-Jacqueline-Jax-e5mkhg
Sponsored by : Headline Music App
"Tired of hearing the same music over and over again on a playlist?  Is your music not being heard because celebrities are taking all of the streaming space?  The day of the Youtube rabbit hole is over. Headline Music streamlines the process of connecting undiscovered artists to users looking for new music.  Artists upload a 30 second clip of their song to Headline Music and using a simple swipe to like feature finding new music has never been easier.  With no preferential treatment, artists are finally on a level playing field.  Download the Headline Music App now on the App store.  Website- www.headlinemusicapp.com
Featured Artist:
D’Z:
Artist: Kerry Kathleen
New Release: “Reverie” 3 track EP
Genre: Indie pop
Located in: Santa Rosa, CA
Reverie is about a dream state, and being able to come alive and be yourself in the nighttime . This song will lift people up and make you feel sexy. This EP has just released (September 27th 2019) and is a milestone for me. I’m so proud to finally be able to release these songs to the world. Reverie, Homegirl, Bright and Right back are all better than I could have imagined. The music..
Music is able to get us out of our funks, lift us up, and remind us that life is beautiful. It has been a constant in my life and it is a creative outlet and it makes me feel so happy and can be healing after a stressful day. My lyrics are always from the heart and I believe that rawness from true vocals is the most powerful part of songwriting. For me, It has to come from my own experiences.
LINKS:  Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/54RpjtwYQn71QiYVdQaCjQ?si=59ASuxu5RWmxTkROW5_-cg https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/reverie-album/pl.u-e98lkVlTZ5rPdm Twitter @kerrykathleenn Facebook @https://www.facebook.com/KerryKatheen Instagram @kerrykathleenmusic
Artist: Beautiful Things
New Release: Hey Hey Hey (Electric Mix)
Genre: Alternative Rock
Sounds like: Garbage, Placebo, Curve
Located in: Los Angeles, CA
Creating music has also been a coping mechanism for me when life gets overwhelming. It’s an outlet for all the complex feelings inside my heart.
Our band creates ethereal pop-rock with deeply personal lyrics. We are very influenced by 80s alternative artists like The Cure, Peter Murphy, and Kate Bush. 
I wrote this song about my experiences with the music industry, looking back to a time when I was much younger and more trusting. I let people guide me and represent me who didn’t have my best interests at heart – only their own. I learned so much from these experiences about human nature which ultimately strengthened me and made me a smarter, wiser person. 
I wanted this song to be empowering, hence the lyric “I won’t be a victim, no never again.” I’ve since chosen the people I surround myself within all areas of my life very carefully and have learned to trust my intuition. It’s made all the difference. Our new Dream World (Revisited) EP is made up of re-imagined songs from the first Beautiful Things album released 10 years ago, called just Dream World. I became curious about what could happen creatively if I let fresh ears take some of these songs apart and put them back together again in a new way. We were inspired to re-do this song from its original version because we thought it would sound great with more electronics and heavier guitars. Many of the ideas on this one came from our bass player Billy who spent lots of time in his studio experimenting with new sounds for it.
The music...
We used more electronic elements and atmospheric sounds than before, which our band loves to experiment with, and we hope to incorporate more sounds like these in our future releases.
Creating music is something our band feels compelled to do because music is very fulfilling for us. I personally get inspired just from listening to other musicians, past and present. There's nothing like the feeling you get when your mind is blown by a melody, guitar chord, lyric, performance, etc. That feeling stirs my soul and compels me to keep creating even when it seems like no one is listening or no one cares. As a musician, you always hope that something you create will conjure those magical feelings in others.
What’s next… We are working on a new single and will be making a video to promote it.
LINKS:  https://open.spotify.com/track/0G9QeybSCD1SYCIpr6vrA6 https://twitter.com/officialthings https://www.facebook.com/beautifulthingsmusic https://www.instagram.com/beautifulthingsmusic
Artist: Ugly Melon
New Release:  Rainbow in the Dark
Genre: Hard rock / Metal /Rock /
Sounds like: Black Sabbath / Disturbed / Shinedown
Located in: Toronto Ontario Canada
Ugly Melon comes from an era of classic hard rock from the 70s Black Sabbath to today modern edge of Disturbed. We mix yesterday's writing style with today's modern sound. 'Rainbow in the dark' is a song written by Ronnie James Dio back in 1983 from the Holy Diver album, the Original song was an up yet simple song. 
We put our Ugly Melon twist to it and made the song a more Modern ballad anthem. 
The Song is as relevant today as it was yesterday. The feeling of being alone and rejected but your really a rainbow in the dark. When doing such an epic song like this that was a huge hit for Dio, you've got to make sure you don't butcher the song. 
When I was thinking of the arrangement I was thinking about how I might make it different, Stairway to Heaven came on the radio and that was it. 
The Music we create comes first off doing the music we want to do and not thinking about if it's going to get signed or get airplay. We want to be real and say here it is to enjoy. Our new album 'Just a Man' is a piece of work we are proud of and love hearing it every time.  
Being real with your music is key. People will hear that and climb aboard for the ride to become fans and spread the word. 
Music is medicine for the soul, the escape from reality for a while, the vision of a live epic performance with visuals on a big screen making it a rock concert to remember that's what inspires us.
Right now we are...
Ugly Melon will be releasing a video soon probably on Halloween song called 'If You're Wrong'. A song about questioning and challenging religious beliefs and to be open-minded to others beliefs. 
LINKS:  https://www.reverbnation.com/uglymelon/song/30535606-rainbow-in-the-dark https://open.spotify.com/track/6jkS0MMp6jl45iyjO3xNE5?si=6aXL5FW2QrWHm_ofcGZ7Iw https://twitter.com/Ugly_Melon https://www.facebook.com/uglymelon Instagram @Ugly_Melon
Artist: Dream Eternal Bliss
New Release: Circling
Genre: alternative rock
Sounds like: Berlin, The Cardigans, Garbage, Duran Duran
Located in: Franklin Lakes, NJ
This song is a moody ballad about your life being stuck in a holding pattern. Challenges we face tend to provide great songwriting material when you want to craft truly personal and heartfelt lyrics. If you’ve ever felt like time is passing you by and you’re sort of immobilized by your situation, powerless to take control and make a change, whether it’s a relationship or work or something else, that’s exactly where “Circling" came from. I find that the happiest times in my life are the most challenging times in which to write personal lyrics.
This song encapsulates a variety of musical influences. It starts with a synth-meets-U2 vibe over some electronic percussion that evolves into something dark and somber, and then in the second half, big drums and heavy guitar kick in.
Right now we are...
shooting a video for this song! And we're beginning our next writing phase, continuing to evolve and refine our sound. I think people will be surprised by the evolution of our sound moving forward as we embrace more of our rock and guitar influences in some of the new material. No specific date is set yet for recording new material, but we’ll start to share some of it at live shows in late 2019.
LINKS:
https://www.reverbnation.com/dreameternalbliss/song/30421617-circling https://open.spotify.com/track/1cqQihDUv9ZInj9Qpeh9jh https://www.facebook.com/dreameternalbliss https://www.instagram.com/dreameternalbliss
https://open.spotify.com/track/1cqQihDUv9ZInj9Qpeh9jh?si=lYo_C_owSxKfpwC1p0h3og
Artist: Chanidu
New Release: Make a better world
Genre: folk pop rock
Sounds like: Cat Stevens, Peter Gabriel, Peter Tosh, Drake.
Located in: Edison, New Jersey USA
'Make a better world' is about developing affiliation and affinity towards others who do not have the same privileges as you do. Treating people the right way you will want to be treated. Caring for and making appropriate changes that can provide a good environment for everyone in the world.
The music we are creating is...
I am always magnetized to this love ambition which I think no one can find unless they have it in their heart. It must be real, cannot be exploited or taken advantage of. When the world starts thinking in the same direction of purpose, the world will be close to achieving happiness and then peace.
I do this because...
Songwriting is within you and it is surrounded by influences gathered from those you listened to and admired. Today's love and hate can be expressed with music. Feelings can also be expressed in terms of empathy or observation. Having the ability to do this anytime, any day is awesome.
Right now we are...
I would appreciate it if people can take the time to listen to all the songs on my current album and leave comments. I will be back in the studios in the first week of October to start recording a single.
LINKS:  Facebook.com/chanidumusic
https://www.facebook.com/chanidu005 https://www.instagram.com/chanidu.music
https://www.instagram.com/Chanidu1 https://twitter.com/chanidu005 https://www.reverbnation.com/chanidu Reverbnation.com/Chanidu005  Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2CaxmqQwziSBeaZ9CTwAb5
Artist: Cabela and Schmitt
New Release: Into Your Hands
Genre: Contemporary Christian
Sounds like: : In particular or specifically... I can't think of any
Located in: : Colorado and Nebraska USA
https://open.spotify.com/track/4skCWnF5cvZgEkwpe4MbyM?si=7joZAQ1FRVaRC5l2KQ6a9A
‘Into Your Hands’ speaks to the struggle within and needing that power and love to help you get back on your feet when everything you do turns into a disaster. He takes his loving hands and brings you out of misery and into happiness. Who wouldn't love to have that kind of person in your life. 
The music we are creating is important because every song we are given to relate is a gift to be shared. A musician never knows where the music comes from, it just comes and it's their obligation to pass it on. 
We do this because it is inside us, it's a part of who we are, it's as much us as any other part of our being. When inspirations come to you in the form of music at any time in any situation, at any given time... it is a gift worth sharing with others.
Right now we are...
We're excited about our new album DANCING SHOES that will officially be released on the 1st of October.
LINKS:  http://www.cabelaandschmitt.com https://open.spotify.com/track/4skCWnF5cvZgEkwpe4MbyM?si=eyYw5yigSQK47AJmxU8-jA @CabelaSchmitt https://www.facebook.com/cabelaschmittmusic https://www.instagram.com/cabelaandschmitt
Artist: TODD BARROW
New Release: Hell and Back
Genre: Country, Traditional Country
Sounds like: Hank Williams, Johnny Paycheck, Charley Pride, George Jones
Located in: Burleson Texas, USA
This song is...
a real country song about real-life situations. The way the musicians play on the track is spectacular. They pour their hearts into this tune because the message is serious with a twist of humor. The song is about when a man cheats on a woman then later regrets it. Don't go down that path, my friends!!!
The music we are creating is...
the direction of traditional country and back to the roots of artists like Patsy Cline, Johnny Cash even some blues like BB King. Trying to pave the way for the old country in a new format! More challenging works of art that have longevity in the music industry.
I do this because...
 #1 I was called to do it. I've tried to give it up several times but it seems to hunt me down. I enjoy writing a song with a theme in mind kind of like putting together a movie but in 3 minutes maybe more. Creating something that is not there is fascinating to me. Taking an idea from the brain with notes and casting out there for the public to enjoy!!! Most of all its fun. Performing the songs before an audience is intoxicating!
The future... 
I'm currently working on a new album/EP for 2020. Very excited to get some fresh country music available for my fans. Currently doing gigs in Texas but recently played at the George Jones in Nashville. Trying to branch out in my touring even possibly UK & Italy.
LINKS:  https://open.spotify.com/track/5X14W5OuEZxmPqUtpQxloJ?si=QRGLT9MvS9--Q3FmVknxcA http://www.twitter.com/ToddBarrowMusic  http://www.facebook.com/ToddBarrowMusic  http://www.instagram.com/ToddBarrowMusic1
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hellofastestnewsfan · 6 years
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By the time I moved to Chicago’s North Side, true dive bars had become rare as pearls in a sea of fakes. The wood paneling, fluorescent beer signage, and Spartan restroom facilities of the imitators conjure the working-class homeyness of the American classic, while the prices, clientele, and subsequent atmosphere undermine that nostalgia wholeheartedly. The transformation—from earnest to faux—is, of course, not unique to Chicago’s gentrified North and West Sides, but is a broadly urban phenomenon synonymous with the rise of brunch culture. Nearly two years ago, in Eater, Matthew Sedacca mourned the decline of the “great American dive bar” as it once existed in urban environments, hustled on as neighborhoods get hipper, rents go up, and middle-class patrons care more about a working-class aesthetic than the down-to-earth folks and cheap beer that occupy true dives.
On either side of economic crisis, dive bars traffic in fantasy. The supposed relic of Americana purity still exists in solidly ethnic neighborhoods and across the massive rural swaths of this country. Dive bars are romantic like pickup trucks are romantic, cherished as a symbol for a certain national way of life presumed to be fading. The fakes capitalize on this rosy vision, trotting out yellowed baseball memorabilia and putting American lagers front and center (never mind that that lager will run you $6). In turn, these icons have begun to suggest something different than what they previously stood for. The distinct blue and yellow of an Old Style sign, for example, was once a beacon for a certain kind of chill, affordable, neighborhood establishment, and sometimes still is. But now, it might also hang outside the type of bar where one would only order Old Style ironically, but more likely not at all.
Another increasingly common feature of these establishments threatens to further unravel the dive-bar aesthetic—the digital jukebox. More specifically, the TouchTunes digital jukebox. By no means the only digital commercial jukebox (other brands include AMI Entertainment and NSM Music), TouchTunes made itself a visible front-runner in a jukebox revival of sorts, in part because it allows users to choose music from their phones. In March 2016, the company—which has since merged with PlayNetwork—debuted an overhauled version of its mobile application which now “allows users to be the DJ and take control of TouchTunes’ jukeboxes” in 65,000 locations across North America. Through the app, these locations delegate musical, and therefore atmospheric, control to patrons and profit in the process. For dive imitators, these devices make it harder to maintain their neighborhood-bar veneer, while actual dives start to resemble their faux peers. TouchTunes erodes the premise of quaint regionalism as bars of all kinds transform into Top 40 danceries.
TouchTunes began simply as a more convenient version of a pay-for-play jukebox. Launching its first prototype in 1993, by the late ’90s TouchTunes distinguished itself as a leader in digital jukeboxes, anticipating the MP3 as the next wave in music storage and playback. “We at TouchTunes envision a world in which the hassles of operating a jukebox become a thing of the past,” said the company on a 1999 version of its website, “where operators effectively manage their jukebox and use that information and free time to really do business, to watch it grow, sit back, and enjoy music once again.” Compared to the CD disc-changer standard, with selections limited by available space, TouchTunes jukeboxes allowed businesses to download and store hundreds of songs for a lower cost. “You guessed it—THERE ARE NO CDs,” TouchTunes enthused in 1999, “(that is what we mean by digital).”
Decades later, the jukebox remains a visible feature of the brand, upgraded and multiplied across a range of fluorescent-lit products, which sometimes include additional features like a photo booth or karaoke, or perhaps the thing that most sets the company apart—integration with its app.
The TouchTunes app, working in conjunction with its jukeboxes, allows users to pay-for-play from the comfort of their barstools. Users “check in” at an establishment with the assistance of a Foursquare property called Pilgrim SDK that’s integrated into the app. Pilgrim SDK is a sophisticated approach to location intelligence more precise than just GPS that uses time stamps and foot traffic to determine a user’s likely location. Pilgrim SDK also allows TouchTunes to send alerts to users in range if the app’s location services remain enabled when the app is not in use (“There’s no wait! Play your songs now and see what’s hot at Generic Tavern!”). The check-in requirement forbids users from, say, fiddling with a jukebox several states away. (Not that anyone would want to do such a thing ...) From there, patrons interact with the playlist much the same way they would with a physical jukebox, purchasing credits and using them to add songs to the queue. Credits can be purchased in $5 (12 credits), $10 (24 credits), or $20 (48 credits) increments via credit card, PayPal, or Apple Pay. Song prices (in credits) are set by the venue and credits purchased are limited to that venue. (So if you purchase $20 worth of credits and your group decides to hop over to the next bar, you’re out of luck until the next time you visit the first bar.)
Like so many apps, there’s an obvious convenience to doing a seamless transaction via device that once would have required cash or a card swipe as well as actually standing up. Aside from in-app control, “I also like the anonymity of requesting a song on your phone,” Jessica Slavik, a 26-year-old account manager living in Lincoln Park, told me via email, instead of “walking up to a jukebox where everyone can see exactly which songs you’re requesting.” However, the anonymity works better in theory than in practice, I’ve found. (It’s hard to remain anonymous when you’re the only table belting the lyrics to Celine Dion’s “That’s the Way It Is,” to use a hypothetical example.) The app does consolidate the time otherwise spent flipping through the catalog, or waiting for someone else to finish their turn. Many customers can have the app open at once, purchasing credits and adding to the queue when it suits them.
Other in-app exclusives include bonus credits rewarded to frequent users and foresight into upcoming songs in the rotation. Slavik, at “Emerging Artist” status (achieved after playing 100 songs through the app), can see the next five songs queued at a given venue and considers this her favorite feature. “I am a Headliner,” a frequent user of the app, Patrick Murphy, a 27-year-old accountant who also lives on Chicago’s North Side, told me via email. “Is that good?” At his current status he can see the next six songs. (An “Opening Act” like myself, meanwhile, can only see the next three. Users begin as “Debut Artists” only able to see the next song in the queue.) This is a useful superpower to have, as anyone who’s ever been stuck in the bathroom just as a certified jam began to play can imagine. Users can avoid jostling the vibe by interrupting a series of soft-rock anthems with something from the party-rock family (or vice versa). It also helps avoid a close-quartered set of repeats, in the case of users who might otherwise request the same song. “Sometimes if I like the songs I won’t have to actually buy my own credits,” says Slavik. The curatorial responsibility becomes an exercise in communal playlist management, not unlike the jukebox of old.
An app, however, unlike a traditional jukebox, introduces a tension between the cooperative end result and an interface primed to make things personal. Accounts keep a running archive of prior check-ins, plays, and favorited songs, organized in the proprietary folder “My Music.” The app can also sync with users’ Spotify and iTunes accounts. These “personalization features,” says TouchTunes, are intended to “combine each user’s play preferences with the venue’s vibe to help users discover the music they have in common with each location.” The admixture makes itself known in a folder called “Hot Songs You Like Too,” popular songs at a given venue that a user has also favorited. But for the most part, users’ personal tastes outrank whatever “vibe” they’ve checked in to. Below the “Now Playing” queue, a hierarchy of scrolling rows sort activity into sections like “My Recent Plays” and “My Top Plays,” with “Hot At [Whatever Venue]” third in the list. Unless user and bar are already a match made in heaven, it takes real effort to attenuate one’s inclinations to match the location at hand—though what incentive is there to subsume your preferences to a greater vibe when you’re paying for the playlist?
With the older jukebox model, selection was necessarily limited but in tune with the character of a place. “No matter how much work was put into choosing a bar’s jukebox music, it was a selection. Certain music fit in certain bars,” Philadelphia magazine’s Dan McQuade lamented in 2012, after his favorite watering hole fell to the TouchTunes revolution. “Every bar’s jukebox is becoming the same.”
In an October 2009 column, The Bollard’s Chris Busby had a similar gripe: “TouchTunes dictates and homogenizes the experience of listening to music,” much like commercial radio.
But something about the nature of Busby and McQuade’s complaints smacks of rock-ist romanticism. Music is never a neutral topic and the staunch protection of a certain way of doing things resists cultural evolution and can amount to a subtle form of discrimination. The songs played on jukeboxes, be they radio hits or dad-music antiques, are selected by real people. But even with TouchTunes installed, some bars have found ways to protect their vibes—or seen another way, filter out certain clientele—with the targeted exclusion of certain genres. Last year, Gina Heeb of the University of Wisconsin at Madison’s The Daily Cardinal found that over a dozen popular rap artists—such as Drake, Lil Wayne, Kendrick Lamar, and Kanye West—had been deleted from the TouchTunes listings of prominent, campus-adjacent bars. One owner didn’t want “gangster hip-hop” at his establishment, which was, as he told Heeb, a “safety-driven” decision—a not-so-subtle implication that black music, which attracts black patrons, means danger. Not all vibes are good vibes.
But if there’s a happy collaboration between past and present, old and new regulars, I’m still not sure TouchTunes is it. The very features that make the app feel liberatory transform it into an un-fun experience for the bar at large as selfishness takes over the deeper into the night you go. Murphy admits he likes to “feel like the bar is at my mercy” when using the app, and while Slavik will defer the playlist when the songs align with her interests, “on the other hand, if I hate the songs, I’ll often spend extra credits to jump the queue and have my songs played first”—a feature called a “fast pass.” On a slow night, this places the song up next, but as the queue grows longer and these fast passes accumulate, you might still have to wait a while, even if you pay extra. “It does get annoying when so many people are also fast-passing that you get added to a 15-song fast-pass queue, which defeats the purpose of spending the extra money,” says Slavik. Fellow bar-goers can turn to adversaries, each one trying to get their songs played first. Sometimes a fast pass is the only way to ensure a song will be played before closing time.
While it’s a comfort to know that you will not be at the mercy of one bartender’s iPod, playing DJ isn’t all TouchTunes promises it to be. The app replaces the predictable rhythms of a local bar environment with the possibility of something choppier, if or when someone decides to supersede the sonic lay of the land. The classic contract between bar and patron is dated, but practical. You provide liquor and ambiance, I offer legal tender and agree to not make a mess. But while TouchTunes undermines that agreement, the most disruptive force is enabling people’s own desires. The age of social media and customized entertainment primes users to expect their tech to adjust to their habits and preferences. Just as auto-fill in web browsers intuits our favorite websites and Netflix adjusts to our tastes, TouchTunes most simply makes the personal more immediate.
Unlike its peers, however, TouchTunes projects the personal into a physical space, a synecdoche for the ongoing instability of what it means for a space to be “private” or “public.” Private enterprise is enfolding many once-public spaces—schools, transportation, and public-works projects, for example. Meanwhile, many private businesses, while not exactly making themselves more accessible, foster choice in a way that at least suggests an individualized experience—letting a public made of walking personal brands assert their tastes in privately owned places. But the ability to “build your own” sub sandwich or playlist comes with a surcharge. It seems many are willing to pay it. A new contract is at work here. They who fill the space control the vibe.
from The Atlantic https://ift.tt/2HXILOI
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iamilettpicon · 7 years
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Millennials on Tinder
Iamilett Picon
March 7, 2017
Millennials on Tinder
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 You are sitting in a coffee shop and your phone buzzes once. It is a flirty message from someone who just came across your Tinder profile and could not help but swipe right. Instead of trying to start a conversation with the handsome stranger sitting across the room you cringe at the message on your screen. Of course it’s nice to know someone finds you attractive, but does it count when you do not even know if the person is real?
Millennials’ lack of social skills come from the fact that this generation has grown up on social media and they have learned to connect with people via text better than face-to-face. This lack of social skills is not only affecting millenials in job interviews and their workplaces. Their inability to effectively communicate and express themselves is especially hurting them in the world of dating.
This generation has a long list of amazing personality traits. They are creative, determined to make an impact on the world and interested in social change. However, they are also quite independent. It is not to say millennials are anti-social, necessarily; they are actually quite social. Yet, their ability to communicate with the people around them is lacking. Nowadays, approaching someone at a coffee shop to pay him or her a compliment is perceived as “weird” or “creepy.” People are not used to interacting with one another anymore; at least not to the extent they once did.
Not only can millennials not properly communicate, but also because they are not keen on social interaction, many of them do not know how to act appropriately on a date.  In fact, millenials are paying upward of $75 for etiquette courses. These courses are designed specifically for men and women in their 20s looking to expand their knowledge on date etiquette in hopes of becoming more desirable. During the length
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of one course the participants are taught that, while on a date, body language and eye contact are as important as using the proper utensils and holding a wine glass correctly. Nevertheless, no amount of etiquette courses will change the fact that millennials do not seem interested in meeting potential partners if it is not through an app.
In a recent survey of 20 to 25 –year-old Tinder users, 91 percent of them said they would rather meet someone, for the first time, face-to-face. They claim it would be a better way of feeling out the other person’s “vibe” and getting a sense of what they are really like. This would then help them come to a conclusion about their compatibility, or lack thereof, sooner.
However, several of the survey participants also expressed they simply do not feel comfortable approaching someone if they find them attractive. “Some people don’t have the mental stability to walk up to someone and make the first move,” said one Tinder user who was interviewed. The fear of saying the wrong thing and having to face instant rejection is far too great.
Along the same spectrum, there were participants who believe getting approached by someone who finds them attractive, in person, is “creepy” and “just weird”. Instead people resort to dating apps, such as Tinder, where they can craft their profiles and message responses and completely avoid people with which they do not wish to connect.
Launched in 2012, Tinder is now one of the most popular dating apps in the world. Its simplicity and free features allows users to swipe right (on people they like) or left (on people they do not like) on hundreds of users without putting much effort into their decision-making process. If a user swipes right on someone who has already right-
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swiped him or her, that person will match and be able to communicate via direct message. However, if a user swipes right on someone who has not yet right-swiped him or her there is an equal possibility of the other user seeing them and swiping or just getting lost in the sea of profiles and never seeing the other user again.
Although Tinder is available to anyone from 18 years old to 55-plus years old, the app is most popular among millenials, or those in their 20s and early 30s. Tinder’s website claims they “empower users around the world to create new connections that otherwise might never have been possible.” As of 2016, Tinder’s website also claims their statistics to be as follows: 1.4 billion swipes per day, 26 million matches per day, 10 billion-plus total matches, and the app is available in 196 countries.  
        Due to the nature of messages that are most commonly exchanged on Tinder, there is a social stigma attached to using the app. If a person is asked what Tinder is for, he or she will most likely describe it as a “hookup app,” a place where you can find a one-night stand. And although the earlier survey revealed that 31 percent of users are on the app to find casual sex, 27 percent are actually trying to find a serious relationship; the rest are simply using it as a way to pass the time and boost their self-confidence.  
According to one Tinder employee, who wishes to remain unnamed, Tinder is a place where people can “find love connections, make friends and network.” While that is not true for everyone, Niomi, an ex-Tinder user, was indeed able to find a love connection.
In an interview, Niomi explains joined the world of Tinder in 2015, after a rough breakup, with no intentions. She saw it as a fun game, a self-confidence booster and “just
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expected to talk to some hot guys”. The thought of finding a serious relationship never crossed her mind.
Before meeting in-person, Niomi and her now-boyfriend Anthony were messaging via Tinder for exactly one month.
“Tinder (made) it easier to start the relationship because we had gotten the chance to get to know each other a lot before meeting face to face,” Niomi explains, “I was more comfortable with meeting him in-person the first time just because we had talked so much before our first date.”
Despite having a Tinder success story, Niomi expresses many of the same concerns as the general population does about how the app might be negatively affecting millennials.
“What if you’re talking to someone and they just tell you things you (want to) hear, in person they could be completely different,” she supposes.
Two millennials, Elizabeth and Walter, who just celebrated 10 years of marriage, shared similar thoughts. Although they never used the app, they understand the appeal.
“(People) don’t have to be face to face the first time and feel intimidated,” says Elizabeth, “but that’s how you know if you click or not. It’s a different feeling when you like someone online and in person.”
“People have the idea of connecting but can’t actually connect,” Walter added.
In an effort to make users feel more “connected” to their matches, Tinder is giving people the option to connect their Instagram and Spotify accounts to their profile.
This feature creates the false sense of connectivity by letting people look at their match’s
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life in pictures and by notifying them of any favorite artists they have in common. In reality, looking at some extra pictures and knowing what a person’s current favorite song is does not make you any more likely to fall in love. This is generally how it goes: You meet someone on Tinder, you follow his or her handles on Instagram, Snapchat, maybe Twitter, and then you never meet. Instead of meeting in-person you use those other social media apps to develop a relationship based on the mutual understanding that despite the fact you met on a dating app you do not actually want to date. Then, you end up with a new online friend.
Meeting someone online is more convenient, but less personal. Online you cannot figure out the things about the other person that annoy you and the things about them that make your heart skip a beat.
People are not used to being approached in-person; online is less threatening. Surely a message that reads “sup cutie” will not make your dopamine levels rise as much as they would if someone approached you in-person to tell you that, theoretically in a room full of people, they found you attractive. As one Tinder user explained, “Technology takes away from the experience of actually meeting someone. There’s no ‘spark’ when you're staring at a laptop screen. You can't read someone's body language through a phone call or sense their vibe through a text.”
Maybe it is the fact that millennials are too busy developing startups and rallying for equal rights that is making them settle for the convenience of Tinder. They have hundreds of potential partners who are sitting in their pockets waiting to be judged on a
couple of pictures and the profile they built to make them sound interesting enough to
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talk to but not like they are trying too hard to be noticed. There is no need to go out into the world and actively look for someone to love anymore.
With the rise of online relationships comes the loss of importance given to human communication, which is something that should be far more valued than it currently is.
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