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#not for lack of outlets shes just Like That and it's a mood tbh
astraltrickster · 2 years
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Hello random tumblr users! I paid tumblr $4.20 to show you my cat
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Enjoy!
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cowboyshit · 3 years
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twenty questions
tagged by: @dustofinsanity (thank you so much my dear!!!!!!)
what do you prefer to be called name-wise? honestly I’ll probably answer to most things as long as they aren’t mean. but ash, ashley, doe, those seem to be the solid three I’m known by around here when is your birthday? november 30th!  where do you live? in a tiny, backwoods cow-town smack dab in the middle of california three things you are doing right now? filling this questionnaire out, eating dinner I just finished cooking, and petting sadie with my foot since she’s curled up at my feet after she finished her dinner four fandoms that have peaked your interest. I guess I can go with four I’ve been heavily involved with, even though there’s plenty more than that since I’m a little fangirl at heart, but wrestling (obviously), black sails, the night shift, and pirates of the caribbean how has the pandemic been treating you? uh, I mean, it hasn’t been great and I’ve had to deal with some pretty bad shit as all of us have, and probably some of my worst mental health battles I’ve had to face in about a year or so, but honestly? I just kind of count my blessings these days. lucky to still be employed, even if my pay got a little cut it was nothing that keeps me from paying my bills. all I had to do was take away a few luxury things to make ends meet, and that’s a lot, LOT less than other people have had to do. so yeah, it’s been pretty shitty, this year has been bad news after bad news both personally and globally, but whatever. it could be worse. a song you can’t stop listening to right now? it is no-joke like a four-way tie. a bunch of good songs were in my discover weekly and I’ve been playing four of them on non-stop repeat one after the other. oh! and one my best friend showed to me. this baby don’t cry by k. flay, rock bottom by grandson, ok ok by hoko, and insurgents by the poolside by denny recommend a movie. i’ve jumped into holiday mood early af because tbh I need the holiday cheer, so keeping in that theme, I suggest the holiday with jude law because DUH how old are you? thirty! school, university, occupation, other? had some college, been working in my current career for the past ten years. hoping to pursue a promotion finally since my supervisors have been telling me for the past eight years that I need to promote do you prefer heat or cold? cold pleeeaaaase! I’m a radiator and put off heat like nobody’s business. I’m always warm. name one fact others may not know about you. this is hard because I just constantly blab everything about me, and I have two people who literally know EVERYTHING about me lmfao uhhh I guess... something people may not know... uhhh... on my dad’s side of the family one half was ashkenazi jewish who had to flee germany to avoid the holocaust, where they went to live in italy, while the other half were nazi’s committing some pretty bad stuff that my family won’t talk about, even to this day. funny how two descendants eventually met in america and fell in love, huh? and when they DID fall in love one of them was half italian and in the mafia! so I always joke that my bubbly cheerful self is a descendent of some pretty evil shit, and it feels like a nice little stab at those shitty ancestors of mine. are you shy? uhhh yeah and no??? like. I think I’m shy, since all interaction terrifies me and exhausts me, but everyone tells me I’m a social butterfly? and I’ve noticed in places I’m comfortable and confident, I do tend to be less shy and more involved and interactive? but I think I can be shy. a lot of waiting for other people to initiate because I’m too afraid to, struggling to talk or carry a conversation at times... I don’t know I think I’m overcomplicating this answer LOL preferred pronouns? she/her!  biggest pet peeves? gatekeeping, to be perfectly honest. I stopped following wrestling back in 2014 because when I first tried to get into the fandom, someone was trying to gatekeep a wrestler I also liked and had started making content for and they made me feel like shit for liking them, and I absolutely hated it. that’s why it took me an entire two years of quietly lurking in the wrestling fandom before I finally got brave enough to come out of the woodwork, and I’m grateful I’ve been so well received this time around. but now I’m hyper-sensitive to gatekeeping and I fucking hate it. no joke. and since it’s a pet peeve and I’m irked just remembering all that bs I went through, ima say I’m only a part of fandom to share my love of whatever that thing is with other people who love it too. I can’t stand anyone who thinks they have some sort of “claim” over a celebrity or a show or anything. get a different identity that isn’t wrapped up in that thing and stop seeing it as a threat when other people like it. be happy someone else is as passionate about that thing as you are and make a friend. damn. what is your favorite “dere” type? I’m pretty sure this is something with anime or that originated from anime, right? unfortunately I don’t know what they are so I can’t say LOL I don’t even know if I’m right about it coming from anime tbh rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be. 4, 5, but I’m putting in the foundation now and working to make it a 6, 7, or possibly 8 by a year or two from now. what’s your main blog? funnily enough? this one. my OTHER blog that was my main blog since I joined tumblr in 2009 got shoved to the side for this one last year LOL I assumed I’d log onto this blog once in awhile, but now it took over my whole damn life so here I am I guess list your side blogs and what they’re used for. I’m going to be fair and ONLY list my active ones because I have a few side blogs from when I role-played on tumblr that I haven’t touched in over a year. @doedreamss is my non-wrestling blog that WAS my main blog before this one, @cowboysht is my archive where I am ONLY putting my original gifsets/analysis/fanfiction so that one day I can offer people a blog of just my original work and no other posts (the queue is very slowly catching up I think I’ve queued posts up until june this year), @illfatedandstarcrossed is just a non-frequently used outlet for me to mope and dump emotions when I get sad about my relationship things (like a diary! but... public? and not my original thoughts? LOL), and then I have one more blog but it’s locked and private and it’s LITERALLY my diary where I can just vent when I got shit I wanna get off my chest but don’t necessarily want people to see it. Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends? I probably won’t talk to you daily, tbh. I may not even talk to you weekly. socializing takes a lot out of me, on top of an already energy draining day-to-day in my personal life. I have a handful of people I connect with who I talk with frequently, but unfortunately as much as I’d love for it to be endless, I have to keep that list short for my own sanity. my infrequent conversations mean absolutely nothing about my lack of interest in you or how much I care about you. my granny once said I would be the perfect friend for someone you only want to talk to twice a month and she thought she was insulting me, but deadass I just said “YEAH! EXACTLY!!”
tagging: I really like this one so I WANT to tag people, but I feel braindead and also just want to post it cause I feel like I am definitely gonna forget to tag someone tbh aaaaahh okay okay I’m just gonna throw some names out there but please don’t feel pressured to do this (it is TWENTY questions) @kennyhoemega, @champbucks, @superkickparty, @adampage, @hintsofsunshine, @audreyhrnes, @sheslikealostflower, @lancearchers, @champnick, @janelanutella, @edgecution, @superrezzy00, @wardl0w, @writinglionqueen, @orangechuckiet, @hungmanhorsecarriage, @icouldbesus, @thatnerdwriter, @rampagewriting, @snarkandsarcasmftw, @tetsuyainthesky AND I DUNNO JUST ANYONE WHO WANTS TO OK I LOVE YOU ALL BYE
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florbelles · 4 years
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otp questions meme
tagged by @nightwingshero and @returnofthepd3​, thanks loves! doing this for john x lyra since that’s the shared fandom
tagging (and i sincerely apologize if you’ve done it or been tagged several times i haven’t been online today) @overboss @fillianore @callmeredhood @sharky-broshaw @chuckhansen @softmillers @tommymillers @spicevalleys @chyrstis @theoutlawdiaries @stvnningstrike @risenlucifer @smithandrogers and anyone else who has otps to talk about (let me know if you would or would not like to be tagged in these things, i feel like pretty much revert to the same list)
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DISAGREEMENTS
who is more likely to raise their voice? lyra’s usually the first but both of them do it who threatens to leave but never actually does? neither during arguments tbh who actually keeps their word and leaves? neither who trashes the house? lyra while john just stands back pointing screaming WRATH. WRATH WAY TO GO WRATHY NICE JOB do either of them get physical? not the way this means  how often do they argue/disagree? at first they're both kind of constantly testing/pushing each other because the concept of unconditional love is foreign to them so there's a constant undercurrent of deliberate provocation or extreme overcompensation but it's something they learn to move past. by the time they're well established and comfortable in their relationship it becomes a fairly rare thing who is the first to apologize? they would both claim the other person does but they usually just end up blowing off steam and circling back to it when they can discuss things more calmly (but tbh most of their fights are incredibly petty have you met them)
(full questionnaire under the cut -- cw for sex, drugs & alcohol references)
SEX
who is on top? either/or who is on the bottom? same who has the strangest desires? lyra tends to have the more inopportune impulses or ill-advised ideas but that’s more of a “no lyra we are not having sex right now you are severely injured that is an entire gunshot wound what happened” “well clearly i got shot john take off your clothes” than anything else  any kinks? i mean. nothing that would be unexpected. since it’s them. who’s dominant in bed? it’s either/or tbh they’re both enthusiasts is head ever in the equation? of course if so, who is better at performing it? they’ve both been around the block many many times sex isn’t a problem for them ever had sex in public? yes, occasionally to unfortunate results. rip to that resistance man who walked by at the wrong time who moans the most? the guards at the ranch hate their job next question who leaves the most marks? both of them honestly they’re rabid who is the more experienced of the two? john (because, lyra would explain, he’s older, he’s an old man, not for lack of effort on her part) do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? fuck initially because it’s what they’re used to, make love later, still do both rough or soft? it’s situational tbh, softer when they’re lazy in the mornings and just want to be together and rough when they’re in the mood how long do they usually last? it’s more a matter of how long they have honestly is protection used? lyra has it covered iud wise does it ever get boring? like i said this is like the one (1) intimacy area they’re fucking great with so no where is the strangest place they’d have sex? i mean. they’ve attempted most places tbh their family and flock live in constant fear of what they’ll walk in on at any given moment
FAMILY
do they plan on having children/or have children? in the alternate cult wins the holy war timeline only; lyra didn’t really want to have them before they left the bunker but it ended up happening five years in anyway since she ran through the preventatives if so, how many children do they want/have? they have twins and a younger son, so three; in my main canon they have none
AFFECTION
who likes to cuddle? both but john’s needier about it who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? both of them  who struggles to keep their hands to themself? both of them, have you met them, they’re not chill dudes how long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? it’s much easier for lyra to express affection physically than verbally so it’s their main outlet honestly, comfort is secondary who gives the most kisses? like i said it’s really the only way lyra can say i love you so it’s definitely lyra what is their favourite non-sexual activity? hot baths, they’ve had a long day harvesting saving souls where is their favourite place to cuddle? they like to sit in those stupid rocking chairs outside the ranch, by the fire pit in their yard or on their couch by the fireplace how often do they get time to themselves? less as the conflict they call the holy war escalates tbh, but they take it where they can
SLEEPING
who snores? john if both do, who snores the loudest? if lyra’s snoring it’s because she’s sick and she’s an entire freight train do they share a bed or sleep separately? share a bed if they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? they fully sleep on top of each other, NO breathing ONLY crushing weight of partner >:(((( what do they wear to bed? they don’t tbh, unless they’re trying to nap in the middle of the day because their sleep schedules were ruined by that pesky war they started are either of them insomniacs? sleep is increasingly a luxury for them but no, not really. lyra has more trouble sleeping alone/in general because she’ll down like five cups of coffee immediately before bed and then be like why is sleep evading me. how could this happen what kind of twisted joke is this i cannot believe the heretics have done this can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? no do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? they’re a tangled mess lbr who wakes up with bed hair? both but lyra has a ridiculous amount of hair so she’s more visibly A Mess who wakes up first? lyra but she usually immediately wakes john up so everyone loses who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? neither. lyra will bring coffee up for both of them and then get back in bed with him and end up passing out so. thanks for the cold useless coffee lyra good job what is their favourite sleeping position? i think i’ve established “position” is an optimistic way to describe the twined up sleeping mess that is them do they set an alarm each night? not usually, lyra’s up with the sun no matter what so it’s only if they have to be up earlier than that for something project-related can a television be found in their bedroom? no tbh who has nightmares? john about the past, lyra about the future who has ridiculous dreams? lyra  who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? this usually isn’t an issue tbh. they’ll accuse each other of it but if it happens it’s usually more of a “someone shifted in their sleep and took the sheets with them” situation who makes the bed? neither of them, lyra’s more likely to remember to strip the sheets off what time is bed time? oh to have a consistent bed time again. they sleep when and where they can, honestly. neither of them are proud of the desk incident. or the fire pit incident. or -- any routines/rituals before bed? they’ll wash up while they recap but nothing unusual (if you ignore the blood they’re scrubbing out of their nail beds) who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? john because if he’d known he was signing up for sadistic disney princess leaning her head out the window at 5:30 am every day he might have reconsidered the sleeping arrangements
WORK
who is the busiest? both of them have a lot going on, who rakes in the highest income? john. lyra was also rich before the cult but if Most of john’s money came from ethically questionable means nearly All of lyra’s did. does pawning the apology diamonds you stole off a philanderer count as ‘income?’ are any of them unemployed? no, the sinners keep them busy who takes the most sick days? john. lyra shows up holding her guts in with her hand like heyyyy who we hunting!!! oh this no it’s fine i’m fine who is more likely to turn up late to work? if they’re late they’re both late, you get me, but it doesn’t happen since work is a life or death situation for them who sucks up to their boss? john. lyra respects joseph but she isn’t desperate for his love and approval, so. you know. what are their jobs? the baptist & judge of eden’s gate. insert truly horrifying job descriptions here who stresses the most? john about the short term (joseph’s disapproval, lyra got stabbed again and decided not to mention it), lyra about the long term do they enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? they love what they do! how lovely for them! ignore the screaming and the antlered corpse you get used to it are they financially stable? yes
HOME
who does the washing? neither. out of the generosity of their hearts they give others the chance to atone by doing everything for them! acts of service! yes! who takes out the trash? their kindness and generosity knows no bounds who do you think takes out the trash who does the ironing? oh lyra actually does this sometimes because she doesn’t trust anyone else with an iron around her clothes who does the cooking? all jokes aside, neither of them, the project takes care of that who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? neither, they’re more likely to burn the house down because they got distracted~ and left the oven on who is messier? i mean have you seen the ranch have you seen the bunker they live in chaos but lyra carries the added threat of lipstick and mascara and bleeding on the table because she’s trying to stitch herself up who leaves the toilet roll empty? neither  who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? they both shed them in a hurry but lyra i guess who forgets to flush the toilet? neither who is the prankster around the house? lyra’s more likely to start it but honestly they do so much shit to fuck with each other who even remembers how it began at this point what matters is lyra’s wanted: sinner poster was over the fireplace for a week who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? lyra is more likely to lose the key to john’s hangar oh no baby guess you can’t fly today (i jest, the answer is neither, they care deeply about their vehicles and more importantly need to be ready to Go at any given moment) who mows the lawn? the peggies. the flock, i mean. their beloved flock. bless them. who answers the telephone? either. usually john. who does the vacuuming? neither who does the groceries? neither, but since lyra’s undercover she can smuggle things back from town sometimes who takes the longest to shower? both of them are menaces but lyra’s hair weighs two tons soaking wet so the whole Process is a bit longer for her (but not by as much as it should be)
MISCELLANEOUS
is money a problem? not at all how many cars do they own? they have their personal cars and then de facto ownership/use of any of the project’s vehicles so. too many do they own their home or do they rent? they own their home and one way or another they’re gonna own your home, too do they live in the city or in the country? country do they enjoy their surroundings? they do now. they’ll talk about their favorite places that are tragically going to get toasted by god’s cleansing fire but they’re happy so it doesn’t matter what’s their song? rabid by nicole dollanganger but don’t tell them they will be deeply offended what do they do when they’re away from each other? when they’re not together they’re usually either working or catching up with their other family members. un project-relatedly, lyra sends a lot of time with faith or going for walks across the henbane (often both), john pets affirmation lovingly where did they first meet? an eden’s gate service lyra attended because she wished to be a menace to scope the situation out, it was very brief and john was extremely wary because joseph was very intrigued by this rando who spends the most money when out shopping? both, someone help them who’s more likely to flash their assets? lyra, but both lbr who finds it amusing when the other trips over? ten minute montage of them pointing and laughing at each other’s failed dramatic exits and getting salty about it any mental issues? oh my god. oh my god who’s terrified of bugs? they got bigger problems who kills the spiders around the house? both their favourite place? the ranch, the yes sign because they’re like that who pays the bills? john deals with the accounts do they have any fears for their future? they’re not overly Worried about the collapse honestly they think they have things more under control than they actually do and in many ways are looking forward to it and that sweet sweet vindication but john is chronically worried by joseph’s concerns about him not making it to new eden and lyra is checks notes chronically worried by joseph’s concerns about john not making it to new eden who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? lyra and it’s a surprise because wtf you’ve been able to cook this whole time we’ve been eating lyle’s food for months who’s the tallest? john when they’re barefoot but i mean. lyra loves her heels who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? they both do this pretty much any time one’s in the shower tbh who wanders around in their underwear? lyra. she loves clothes for the aesthetic but she lives in lingerie and dressing gowns at home who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? lyra always what do they tease each other about? lyra teases john about being older like ah yes john, how is at 32, the age that you totally are, the actual age of 32 called and it’s holding your ass hostage. makes fun of oh john, thinks it’s ridiculous. pitches her voice three octaves higher when she repeats anything he says to anyone. john makes fun of her impractical hair and that time she killed a dude in idaho for threatening her at a gas station and then threw together the worst cover up known to man like wow lie-ruh what a great serial killer you are whoa your competence is astounding your sheer talent your brilliant mind you planted your own gun at the scene iT dIdnT hAVe sERiaL NumBERs JOhn pffffft ridiculous  who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? they’re glorious extra dramatic disasters with their fashion sense and they embrace it in each other tbh who crushed first? john but he was desperately gathering dirt on her to be like “see joseph she sucks 0/10 we do not need” so it was a complicated process for him any alcohol or substance related problems? oh yeah i mean they both have a history of addiction (john moreso than lyra drug-wise, she used them but it didn’t get to his level since seeing seeing how it affected her mother made her wary) and harmfully self-medicating so while they’re theoretically clean(er) they’re never going to have healthy relationships with addictive substances who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? lyra. i had to johnatthew the rethitanth wath takin shots i’m undercoverrr who swears the most? john when he’s upset, lyra in casual conversations
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softpine · 4 years
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i’m sorry i got so behind!! i separated this into sections so you can find your ask easily 💖 also the rest of the what-if questions are in here if you’re interested!
STORY QUESTIONS:
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she would definitely feel guilty still, for letting aileen leave even when she knew something bad would happen :( but at least she wouldn’t have the guilt of “failing” as a mom on her shoulders (i don’t think she failed, it was a mistake anyone would make, but that’s how she sees it)
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omg i love leppelier!! but there probably won’t be anymore characters inspired by a separate peace (even finn has taken a life of his own and i see less and less similarities to finny every day), mostly because i like to think of my own characterization!! but everything i do is a tiny bit inspired by all the books/shows/movies/games that i love, so i’m sure there will be some inspiration thrown in there from a separate peace 💖
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originally i said he was bi, but i realized it makes way more sense in the future if he’s gay!! so yeah he’s gay lmao!
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that’s a really good question!! and it’ll actually be partly answered in the future, so i don’t want to say too much!! but ummm perhaps... maybe... asa DID hear finn.... 😬
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i know right, poor bby :( if jo & owen hadn’t stayed together, i think they all would’ve been happier in the long run. it would’ve been hard at first, trying to figure out visitation & making sure owen has time to actually bond with jett, but once they got that figured out, they could’ve been great coparents and friends :/
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fjksjd i hope you’ll like how everything happens either way!! 💗
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it would be an entirelyyy different story sdjkdj i actually don’t even know what the story would be about if he couldn’t see spirits... i was tossing around the idea of having a gen focused on depression (i have depression and i thought maybe it would be nice to have an outlet to express it) but i realized it would’ve been too hard for me to write about on a daily basis. soooo yeah i have no clue what asa’s story would be without ghosts lmao!!
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YESSS that’s describes her 100%!! 💖💖
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@killjoytrait​ god i know right!! literalite blessed us all with an angel :’)
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jksjd you’re actually the second person to guess this, but she’s just a random model sim! sorry to disappoint 😭 but i did make a hypothetical danny/mikaela baby here if you’re curious!! 
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when i got this notification all i saw was “i don’t want it to sound like i hate asa” and i was ready to FIGHT 🗡️ but this is totally fair!! i also love complicated family dynamics, and whenever i can make it complicated, i do sjdkjd but yeah it’ll definitely be interesting!! also fun fact, originally i planned for casper to be really jealous of asa once he found out that danny was asa’s “real” dad, not casper’s (especially since he wasn’t even legally tied to danny at the time). but as i developed casper’s character i realized it just wasn’t in his nature to be resentful like that. but i’m excited to get into the dynamic between casper/asa/Baby because of the age differences (casper will be 16 years older than Baby) and like you said, asa will have to adjust to being the middle child!!
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thank you!! 💖 and mood sjdjkd
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omg ofc i care!!! this is so cute!! i tried to find the song you mentioned, but it’s greyed out on spotify and it’s not on youtube as far as i can tell :( but i’ll try to buy the digital movie version when i can! anyway this made me really happy that you thought of them jsdkj ily 💖💖
HELP/ADVICE:
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hmm well i kinda feel like i don’t have any right to talk about this subject, but at the same time it’s important, so... i’ll just say my opinion lmao but i’m not trying to talk over POC at all!! but honestly, diversity is a requirement for me to follow you. i don’t trust people who, like you said, will create all white sims and a couple racially ambiguous sims and then complain when people accuse them of a lack of diversity. using the excuse of “it’s just a game / it’s just my preference” doesn’t work for me lmao, it just makes me wonder why you would PREFER to play a game entirely devoid of people of color... there’s just no reason for it. i’m not creating diverse sims for “brownie points” or to please people, i’m doing it because that’s the world i live in? imo you shouldn’t have to think about it, you should just... do it.... lmao. and if someone calls you out for not being diverse, you should hear them out instead of getting defensive. like for example, a few months ago someone sent me a message asking if i would have any asian characters, and that was eye-opening to me because i hadn’t realized i was lacking in that area. so i made elaine and found a way to work her into the story, which ended up adding a lot of good stuff to my future plans!! so yeah that’s my opinion lmao sorry for the ramble!
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i’m sorry, i don’t know what you mean? i don’t make build cc :( sorry!!
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hey! you can definitely merge them! i merge almost all of my build/buy cc, just make sure that the packages aren’t too big (s4studio always gives me an error if if the file is too large, and if that happens i just split it in half). you can merge all of your custom content, but don’t merge your mods! (ie. you can merge hair/clothes/makeup/accessories/etc. but don’t merge game changing mods, like mc command center, ui cheats, etc.) i hope that helps!! and you’re not annoying at all bby!! 💖
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i do!! it’s here! it’s not super detailed though lmao, feel free to ask if you need something specific 💖
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hey!! i have some various advice here! but if you’re worried about copying... honestly don’t be lmao. since the dawn of time, we’ve all been recycling the same few plotlines & character types. as long as you put your own original spin on it (and you’re not directly copying someone’s story) i see nooo problem with using similar plot devices!!
NICE PEOPLE :’)
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lmaoo thank you!! i actually love my supernatural posts, and i’m trying to keep loving them even when they aren’t as popular. but anyway, i really appreciate this!! sometimes i feel like a loser for how much time & thought i put into this silly story sjdkjd but then asks like yours make it all worth it!! thank you so much 💗💗
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@carmeldreams​ ILY EM!! 😭💖💖💖
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yes PLEASE come get this kiss....... sjdkjds 💗
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@astralani​ YOU FIRST jskdjd ily 😭😭💖
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@thesimparrot​ thank you so much zoe!! you’re so sweet 😭💖💖 i’ve been hoping that you’re safe and doing well 💗
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@simsnectar​ thank you for thinking of me!! the same goes to you! 💖
MISC:
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that’s true, i didn’t think about that 😭 you can see that i’m a pessimist lmaoo
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@killjoytrait​ oh my god yesss this is literally what i believe! i don’t have a religion so i gotta believe in something, and the multiverse theory is so interesting lmao!
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that’s very true lmao, there are some objectively bad choices for sure. i was thinking more like... what if my entire life would be different because i walked a different route to school in 9th grade or something fjskdj and what if my life would be way better in that case 😭
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is this about the two trucks having sex meme sjdkjd
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lmaoo i do the same thing, the office has taken over my life jsdkj
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thank you for the recs!! 💖 i actually watch bella fiori sometimes, but sometimes i wish her videos were more detailed :/ she’s so cute though i love her sdjkd and i don’t know why i stopped watching eleanor neale?? i used to watch her all the time but i think i started disliking how sensationalized her videos were getting. like the one video where she put a picture of a suspect in the thumbnail, but that man was cleared of all wrongdoing and his name & face has been dragged through the mud for years... so that just put a bad taste in my mouth lmao but i’ll have to check out bailey sarian!
COVID-19 (you can skip the rest of this if it makes you anxious!)
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i’m sorry you’re going through this :( i’ll be thinking about you 💖💖
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yeah exactly!! i’m not worried for myself at all, i’m healthy and active, but i’m very very worried about accidentally transmitting it to one of my immunosuppressed relatives :(
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thank you for this!! you take care too bby 💖
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yiiiikes yeah it’s really scary!! every day it feels more and more dystopian here, and i’m in a state that only has 20-ish cases right now, which isn’t a lot. but our whole school system is shutting down, all the government buildings are closed, all activities/shows/movies are closed, people are clearing out entire grocery stores, etc. it’s freaking me out tbh.... i’m just hoping that if we all can quarantine ourselves properly, the hospitals won’t get overfilled, so everyone will be able to get the care they need :(
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entriesfromangels · 4 years
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Journal Entry (#5) ~
Oh the times we are living in right now.
It’s crazy how a virus is changing our daily lives. How it affects people mentally and physically. But we have to do what we can to keep others safe. Stay home y’all. It’s the best we can do!
Staying home is ideal for anyone who is an introvert at heart. I am but I do like to go out from time to time and socialize with others. Its weird not being able to do that right now.
Lately I’ve been struggling. Not with the whole quarantine stuff but with family. As y’all know, I’m living with my fiancé and his family or my future in-laws.
My MIL (mother-in-law) and I are not in the best situation. Our relationship is complex. There is respect there but right now its not anything more than that.
We had a talk a few days ago about where we stand. I have had previous talks with her but it involved me writing things down that bothered me and after she told me to place myself in her shoes... i realized I’m going about this all wrong.
She felt i was ambushing her with all the negative things i don’t like that she does. After sitting down, hearing how she felt, it really hurt me to know i have been treating her so poorly. I also have a bad habit in venting about my issues with her to my fiance and my parents. My MIL sees it as talking s**t and obviously... that wasn’t my intention but i see where she is coming from.
I’m Hispanic. Our culture involves gossiping and venting thoughts and emotions to ones we are the closest to. All my life, i never saw it as an issue because I’ve always done it. My family does it. My friends do it. I was bound to pick it up.
My fiance is white. Obviously their culture is different and gossiping is seen as a harmful thing. After hearing what she felt about me doing this, potentially damaging her having a future relationship with my parents, painting her in a negative light and just overall not feeling good about herself and how she’s portrayed to others, has been a negative impact on her self-esteem.
Another issue that had been bothering her is when i vent about her to my fiance. Things she does that bothers me, things that annoys me and things that make me angry. She mentioned, in order to maintain a positive relationship, i need to go to her for any issue i may have with her. I don’t know why its taking me so long to understand and realize that's what i should be doing but I am doing that now.
There is also a lack of trust. I promised her i wouldn’t tell my fiance about our talks and continue to complain about her. After our last talk before our recent one, i did the opposite and told him everything we talked about. Big mistake.
She saw it as backstabbing and from then on, has slowly lost trust in me. After she explained that, while crying, i was starting to realize how my actions are affecting her.
Being from a different culture isn’t an excuse. Being used to how i handle things and express myself when it comes to difficult situations isn’t an excuse. I have been treating her basically like a piece of trash and i feel so f***ing terrible about it........
All my life, after coming out of treatment, i have embraced positivity and wanted to live my life with no negative people or negative thoughts. Since living here and getting to know my in-laws better, I have done the complete opposite to my MIL and i just feel like the worst person...
She told me it will take time before she can fully trust me again and i totally understand. I’m 24, going to be 25 in June and i am acting like a child tbh.
Sometimes when you go about things a certain way for so long and don’t think anything more about it, you don’t really realize how someone else, who might not be used to that, may feel.
I have so many positive people in my life, i do but we gossip. Not always but it does happen. That may not be positive to someone else and you know what? It really isn’t. I saw a normality behind it and didn’t think it would be harmful to someone else.
My MIL can get on my nerves and i know i get on hers. That is bound to happen. The way i have been handling our conflict has not been the best. I know i can do better. She said she was going to watch and see if i do hold up to what i said i was going to do and with time, slowly grow her trust back with me.
I have been so blessed to have a wonderful fiance and a great MIL. She has done so much for us and is a literal angel for her efforts. I just haven’t been showing it... my actions haven’t spoken for my words and that is a real problem.
I know deep down I’m not an awful person and i know she isn’t either. How can she know that if all i have done is gone behind her back and vent about all the things i think she is doing wrong. That isn’t right and it hurts to think i have affected someone else in this way.
Since our talk on Saturday (3/28), I haven’t spoken to anyone about what we specifically discussed. The most i have said is our talk was good and we are doing okay moving forward. I have not even mentioned it to my fiance and honestly, we have been more playful and loving without me spreading negative feelings towards his mom. If he gets annoyed with her on his own, i have just been comforting him and reminding him that she loves him and talk her up instead of agreeing and making him think worse about her.
I never in my whole life considered gossiping or venting as being a negative thing or impact on someone else. I’ve always done it. It may seem odd to someone else that it has taken me this long to understand the dangers of this. Especially when i have experienced it on the other end. Its not fun, it makes you feel helpless since you cant defend yourself when the gossiping takes place. So you may ask, “if you understand how this can be negative to someone else, why are you still engaging in it?” My answer is, i don’t know.
Gossiping is a very social thing. Your friend brings up something someone else did and complains. What do you do? Agree with your friend and comfort them. If its about a friend, we bring in what also bothers us about them and continue with that. It seems harmless but you might also think, what about the person you are talking about? What is this issue that annoys you so much that you can’t bring it up to the person being talked about? How would that make them feel if they knew you were talking about them in a negative light?
And you know what, that's true. How would that make the other person feel? The answer to that is, not very good. I saw it with how hurt my MIL was about it. How she tries so hard to please others and make others feel happy and comfortable. I was so heartbroken to see that i caused her to feel so bad about herself, made her cry and loose her trust with me.
She also mentioned if this is how i really am as a person, that she doesn’t want to be involved in that. The truth is, i am not that person. I love people. I love my family/friends and i want nothing but for them to be happy and feel loved. I just haven’t properly given my MIL the love and respect that she so greatly deserves and for that, i will always feel terrible; even when things get better.
Moving forward, she said she will watch to see if i fulfill my promise to not vent or complain about her and if there is an issue, i come directly to her instead of being a chismosa (gossip in Spanish). So far i haven’t complained, vented or talked about our whole conversation to ANYONE.
Instead, i’m writing it on here. My positivity blog where i feel the most safe with my thoughts. This is better than spreading gossip and bringing others into a situation when its just between the two people involved.
Everyday since our conversation, i have been feeling lighter and happier with my surroundings. One thing that won’t change is my mental health struggles with anxiety and depression; having thoughts and needing an outlet to let them out. Thanks Tumblr! Lol
I will continue to post how our relationship progresses and my feelings/mood since giving up gossiping. To tell you the truth, I feel so much better and understanding about the situation knowing what i did wrong and how that affected someone else I love/care about.
You are never to old or young to better yourself and improve relationships.
I hope for nothing but positive feelings and thoughts moving forward and if i do have something negative to say, its better to not say it at all.
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invelleity · 5 years
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psst. be honest. all of the questions. go.
i can’t believe jeanette is tryina kill me in public and i’m still love her??? | not accepting anymoooore | @ltbroccoli​
cracks knuckles here we go ( odd numbers 1-9 are here )
2. Are aesthetics important to you? If they are, why?
Not very. It’s fun and cute and all, but I care a whole lot more about “clicking” with people and having fun writing with them.
Exception: If someone’s aesthetic is so overblown that I can’t even find the pages on the blog or read the text, I.....won’t interact with that tbh.
4. How do you explain rp to someone in the real world?
(kicks down my roommate’s door at 10pm) “OK so I’m writing— stop screaming, it’s me,— I’m writing a character in Security and you’re like a double black belt or some shit, can you explain how—”
( My roommates all know it’s a thing I do but I’ve never sent them a link or shown them any of the actual writing. They’ve met a bunch of y’all over like Rabbit streams and @rumdaydreams​ irl though so like.... They Know. )
More under the cut
6. Do you prefer writing male muses or female more? Why?
Ehhh, depends on my mood. I lean towards female muses in general ( definitely got a bigger chunk of ladies on my list, for sure for sure ) but I love my boys.
8. Name any three things about the rpc that bother you.
Uhhhh A) We’re all such dumb socially awkward blobs so it’s often hard to get to know new people.
B) The feel that if you have a good relationship with one person who writes a canon muse, it’s some kind of lowkey betrayal to write with other people who write the same muse??
C) How much I, a certified card-carrying dumbass, stress myself out about posting on a “regular” schedule. Does that count? Like I want the blogs to look “presentable” lmao and me@me Calm The Fuck Down.
10. Have you ever had a bad experience with commissions? As either someone who makes them or as someone who buys them?
N / A
11. What do you know now about rp that you wish you knew when you first started?
Uhhhh, when I first started was long enough ago and the community was so different a lot of those lessons no longer apply. I wish when I finally jumped over to Tumblr I’d realized quicker how the new like....basic ways of meeting people and posting and all worked, which was mostly just a “calm down and go with the flow more, let go of your stupid rigid old habits” lmaooo.
12. Have you been involved in drama? Do you regret it?
yES. Yeah. Hahaha ha h. 
But ummm, not usually. No. Most of my drama has been either A) me posting the very very softest, most diluted version of barely-touching on my politics and my real goddamn life and people being fuckin butthurt as hell about or B) cutting people who were toxic and draining out of my life. So.
13. Have you ever thought about leaving rp? What caused it? What changed your mind?
cw suicidal ideation ment
Yeah. Once I actually did — when I started college I just didn’t have the time, so I peaced from the larger community to just write with close friends for a while. I’ve also considered leaving the T.umblr RPC a few times, but really only because of long bad depressive episodes. Coming back and “not wanting to literally die irl ha Ha” and catching up with my drafts gets me back on track lmao. 
14. Do you think rp has had a positive or negative affect on your life or you as a person?
Positive! Sometimes I worry that I spend too much time wrapped up in fiction and miss my real life, but I’ve learned to keep my time more separate so now it’s just good to have a healthy hobby that makes me happy. Also I’m definitely a much better writer for it, and there a lot of networking skills I think translate to real workplace skills so it’s 👌
15. How has rp changed you personally?
See above, tbh. And it gives me a lot of good outlets for writing ideas that would otherwise stew in my head until I hated myself for never ever writing any lmao. It’s good.
16. If you could change one thing about rp on tumblr, what would it be? Why?
Oh, I dunno. I wish I could post replies from mobile more easily, god. That’d keep me a lot more on top of my drafts lmao.
17. Have you ever sent a message to yourself on anon? Why?
Not on any of the rp blogs. ;^)
18. Have you ever sent hate to yourself on anon? Why? 
No, wtf
19. Do you delete anon hate or post and address it? Why?
Depends on the hate — things I feel need to be addressed or I want to be clear about not tolerating I’ll post. Personal hate and mean shit I delete.
Or if it’s stupid and makes me laugh I will definitely post that shit.
20. Have you ever felt pressured to write something you weren’t comfortable with?
Sometimes. If a partner is actually pressuring me I’m real good at saying uhhh hey, fuck off about that? but sometimes partners will perfectly-innocently be enthusiastic about things I’m not super comfortable with and that’s harder to bring up. So it’s..... more like I pressure myself, whoops.
21. Have you ever followed someone because you felt like you had to, not because you wanted to?
Ehh. Not really. Sometimes I’ll follow a friend of a friend despite lack of interest just because, like.... My friends are smart and good, maybe I’m just not getting the right “vibe” from their blog as who really they are. Sometimes that just means we never click and I unfollow them later. Or sometimes @rumdaydreams​ drags me straight to mutual hell and we write 20,000 unfinished bullshit and meet irl and she actually talks me into wholeass new blogs and muses. So, you know. Mix bag.
22. What would make you block someone?
Red flags for manipulation and lowgrade emotional a.buse, especially ones I viscerally feel in my stomach from previous experiences. Obvious r.ight-leaning politics ( Weirdly, I’m not particularly comfortable around people who don’t think I or my friends deserve to be treated like human beings! A character quirk, haha! )
Also ngl sometimes I block people just to remind myself I’ve followed them before and I don’t wanna re-follow them six times and look like I’m trying to intentionally harass them. My memory is bad but the block button always knows, lmao. 😅
23. Have you ever stolen something from someone else?
Not intentionally — I try very hard not to steal hc from duplicates or take plots without asking. But, y’know, sometimes an idea sticks in your head and you eventually just forget where it originally came from.
24. Have you ever had something stolen from you? If so, how did you handle it?
Not that I’m aware of.
25. Are you open to duplicates? Why / why not?
Absolutely, for the most part! I like seeing other perspectives, and especially since @thewrongsorts​ is such a bigass multi it lowkey just makes my life easier.
There are a few exceptions — less because they’re duplicates and more because there are hc/fanon I just......dislike enough I don’t wanna write with them. Not a feeling that’s limited to duplicates tbh.
26. How do you feel about vague posting? 
Ehhh. It’s like not a great thing, but I get the appeal. I tend to unfollow if someone posts a lot of it because then they’re just passive-aggressive as a person, but the occasional vagueblog I don’t mind. Sometimes you gotta get shit off your chest but you don’t wanna make it a wholeass call-out, I get it.
27. Do you follow people even if they don’t follow you back?
Generally I unfollow. I’m here to write, if we’re not interacting it’s clogging my dash. ( Honestly I unfollow mutuals eventually if we never write.... ) But very occasionally someone’s got such good #takes and hc that I stick around just bc I stan.
28. Do you read people’s rules before following or interacting?
A l w a y s.
29. What is your opinion on “reblog karma” and do you practice it?
It’s nice! Like.... I wouldn’t require anyone to do it, but it makes people feel better about their blogs, it’s polite. I know I’m happier getting memes as well as passing them along. You know, be social. Connect with people. I always try to practice it, yeah.
30. How have you responded to popular slang used on tumblr? Do you use it in every day life? Do you use it at all?
Uhhh, yeah. My irl social circles are a lot of dumb gay millennials, we use a lot of dumb internet slang.
31. Is there something you don’t know the meaning of but you haven’t asked anyone because you think it’s supposed to be general knowledge?
Oh yeah! Joined Tumblr rpc ten years late with Starbucks! But also like.... I’m a web developer. 90% of my irl workskills are being good at Googlin’ shit. So I’ve pretty much always found the answer on my own, at least. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
32. Was there ever something you had to ask someone to explain? 
( See above. )
33. Have you ever experienced discrimination? 
Here or irl or....? I mean yes in any case, but much less often in the rpc specifically. This blog is a lot less outspoken ( both about politics or about who I....am....generally ) than most of my others or me irl.
Shoutout to that time I complained one (1) time about how copacetic the H.arry P.otter rpc is and an actual irl n.eon.azi jumped in my inbox lmaooooooo.
34. How do you feel about personal blogs following your rp blog?
Uhhh, I don’t love it? But if they mostly chill and don’t fuck with my actual threads I usually ignore them. ¯\_( ‘ ‘ )_/¯
35. Have you ever cried while writing a reply?
No. I’m not like......good at crying. 😐
36. Do you read other people’s threads or do you only read your own?
Depends on the blog. Some multis I follow are in fandoms I just like don’t even understand, so I don’t read those. Sometimes I just don’t got the energy. But I read a lot of my friends’ other threads or threads on blogs I stan.
Good writing is good shit and I’m.....a big 👀 bitch. Tbh.
37. What’s one thing that other people seem to hate that doesn’t bother you?
Call-out posts, bringing real life politics into rp, generally acknowledging that we have lives outside of the fictional world that affect how we read and interact with fiction.
( 👏 The O.rder 👏👏 of the 👏 P.hoenix 👏👏 is A.ntif.a 👏👏👏 )
I don’t want to ever push that onto other people though, definitely. (Especially people affected by terrifying irl politics and coming here for escapism. )
38. How do you feel about tagging triggers? Do you tag them? How do you determine what is triggering content and what isn’t?
Always 👏👏 tag 👏👏 fucking 👏 triggers 👏👏👏
I tag things that are common or obviously upsetting, and if someone asks I add whatever tags they need to my list — the “list” is mostly a mental tally so I occasionally fuck up, but god I feel strongly about triggers.
Let 👏 people 👏 who are hurting 👏👏 live. 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
39. What advice would you give to someone new to rp?
Poking around to see how other people seem to “operate” and scrolling through posts about how to get started is so so so fucking helpful! Don’t be afraid to do it!
Also reach out to people as much as you can work up the spoons to. If they’re rude back to you, like..... They were never worth your time anyhow. You dodged a bullet.
( Value yourself 2k19 )
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bugheadfamily · 6 years
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Bughead Family Discord Member Spotlight
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Graphic by: Katie ( @betty-cooper )
This week the spotlight is on Bridget (@duskyblossom)! Click the read more link below to get to know our member!
Spotlight by Mila, @jughead-jones
Bridget | @duskyblossom
Name: Bridget
Age: Old enough to do Lego.
Location: Somewhere in this crazy universe.
Any other languages aside from English people can contact you in?: I would say a little bit of French but probably best not to haha.
Favourite Riverdale characters and ships?: Betty, Jughead, Cheryl (after she reconciled herself), Mary, Midge (rip), Valerie (somehow fell off the face of the earth?), Fred! My favourite ships are definitely Bughead and Choni, they’re just so adorable!!
Favourite moments from S1 & S2?: My favourite episode was 2x09 because of how the writers executed it, I know a lot of people disliked it but I thought the storylines in that made sense (Not because of the lack of bughead, I liked the actual CONTENTS and not just the shipping aspect.) 2x12 was also really good! In terms of bughead content,obviously 2x12 and 2x14 were the most bughead filled parts of Season 2, but I really liked 2x05 because man, that pulled at the heartstrings. Stuff like the ‘I believe you, Jughead.’ scene was what made Season 1 really cute in terms of Bughead. I also really liked the dynamic they had between Betty and Jug in S2.
What are your hopes for S3?: In terms of Bughead, I really want to see RAS giving them a chance to act like real teenagers not 25 year olds. I want to see them being all cuddly and just being happy for once!! I’m also super intrigued to see where the serpent storyline will go, and how Betty will interact with Gladys and Jellybean.
Other fandoms you’re into?: Nothing, really. I used to be a huge Hunger Games and Harry Potter nut, so you can still talk to me about those! I also LOVE The Office, it’s my other favourite TV show!
Something non-fandom you love?: Reading, art, and baking!
What are some of your favourite movies/TV?: Oh, BOY. This question is really hard. For TV, obviously Riverdale is my number one, but The Office US comes a close second. I got so invested in The Office and it was so difficult to see it end. For movies, the Sound of Music can’t really be beat in my books. It’s such a timeless classic that i’ve loved forever. La La Land is my VERY close second, that film was and still is the death of me. Lady Bird was an INCREDIBLE film, I really related to it and its bittersweetness and sentimentality! And classic musicals like Mamma Mia and Grease.
Favourite books?: I read a lot, so I’m so excited to share some of my faves! Obviously the Harry Potter series, that influenced me a lot. The Hunger Games trilogy was also really gripping and I loved that. The Sun Is Also A Star by Nicola Yoon was so enlightening and I loved that. The Catcher In The Rye by J.D. Saldinger, such a classic and I loved the way it was written. Turtles All The Way Down by John Green is a really good book that brings light to mental health in a less harsh sense which is perfect for me. I’m also reading The Circle by Dave Eggers at the moment which is great so far!
Favourite bands/musicians?: I don’t really listen to anyone in particular, but my 2 favourites are Adele and Sam Smith.
If you could live in any fictional world which one would you choose and why?: I feel like everyone says this, but probably Harry Potter. I wouldn’t want to risk the chance of getting murdered in Riverdale tbh!
Favourite food?: This question is so so SO difficult but I’d have to say shoestring fries with aioli and a huge side of salad.
Favourite season?: Spring! All the flowers bloom and all the baby animals are born, it’s starting to get warmer but it stills rains! Everything about it is just wonderful.
Favourite plant?: Baby’s breath! It’s so delicate and sweet.
Favourite scent?: Starfruit or vanilla bean. Starfruit is such a fresh and pleasant scent, while vanilla makes me feel all cosy and calm.
Favourite colour?: Pink, pink, pink!! I love it so much.
Favourite animal?: Can I be boring and say dogs? I just love them.
Are you a night owl, an early bird, or a vampire?: Can I say none of these? I love sleep so mornings are not for me, and being a vampire is a big no-no. So I guess I would say night owl, as I’d rather go to sleep late than wake up early.
Place you want to visit?: All over Europe - it’s such a beautiful and interesting continent.
Do you have pets?: If you do, tell us a little about them: Yes I do! I have a schnoodle (schnauzer + poodle cross). He is the cutest little thing and always gives me snuggles even though he really just wants food haha. I love him to death.
Tell us a little about yourself?: I mean, what’s there to tell? Hmm… I guess I could say I’m a creative person. Work that I’m not inspired by is really difficult for me such as areas like mathematics or science. I’ve always been a creative soul, I much prefer the arts over sitting at a computer and typing equations or finding out molecular structures. That stuff just doesn’t interest me! I’ve always been a girly girl at heart, as I said before I adore the colour pink and cutesy things. Tying in with being a girly girl, I’ve been a hopeless romantic since I can remember. I feel like I always look at the idealistic side of things, which doesn’t help me being a perfectionist. To all the people who aren’t perfectionists, lucky you. It’s beyond frustrating when something isn’t how I want it to be. Making art and other things is a challenge for me, if I’m not completely happy with what I’ve done, I will throw it out. There’s a running joke that I’m not allowed to give up on a piece anymore because I’m that bad! I’ve always been super academic, I’ve never been one for sport as it doesn’t activate my mind as such. Although I must say, swimming is something I’ve always been good at. I’m such a water baby! I’m super in to fashion and photography, it really interests me how you can express yourself through simple things like what you wear. I think that’s it!
Fun or weird fact about you?: My pinky finger on my right hand moves completely on its own. I can move it up and down without any of my other fingers moving. I haven’t met one person who can do it too!
Asks for fanfic authors:
How long have you been writing?: About 3 years now!
Which is your favourite of the fics you’ve written?: Well I mean My Muse Yet My Saviour as that’s the only thing I’ve done in the bughead fandom so far!
Favourite fic/chapter/plot-point/character you’ve ever written?: Probably Chapter 9 of MMYMS. (Spoiler if you haven’t read it!) I was really glad I got to incorporate Jellybean into the story and write her out in my own way as I’ve seen other writers do before. I can’t wait to see how she’s portrayed in S3!
Which was the hardest to write, and why?: All of it, to be honest. Writing is difficult for me as I get bored easily with a lot of things and I have to push myself to put out the best content I possibly can.
How do you come up with the ideas for you fic(s)? (examples: Do you draw inspiration from real life? Listen to music? Get inspired by TV/movies?) Do you have an process to your writing?: Can I say my brain? I just make stuff up as I go along, and somehow make it work! There’s no rhyme or reason to my writing either - I just word vomit onto my document and then organise it!
Idea that you always wanted to write?: Just normal, teenagery bughead. I think that’d be adorable!
Favourite character to write?: Betty - she has so much versatility and you can create a lot of dimension with her!
Best comment/review you’ve ever received?: All of them. I’m so appreciative of all the praise I get, it really motivates me to create more content. Thank you to anyone who’s ever commented, I appreciate you!!
Best and worst parts of being a writer?: Best is probably having that creative outlet to share your work and ideas. It gives me a chance to share all my thoughts and feelings in a way and I love it! Worst is probably the time it takes. Mostly I don’t have enough free time to write and when I do I’m not in the mood. Finding that balance is really difficult.
Do you have any advice to offer?: Keeping working hard! If you don’t push yourself, your work won’t be of your best ability. Giving yourself a challenge shows off your skills and makes you work harder than before, which really pays off.
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This is the second instalment of Bughead Family’s Member Spotlight series. Each week, a member’s url is selected through a randomizer and they will be featured in a spotlight post. In order to participate, please join the Bughead Discord (more information found here). Thank you.
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