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#no dialogue because i was only doing this as practice and I am very bad at dialogue @.@
papenathys · 1 hour
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Mahashweta Devi and Sharankumar Limbale low key changed my life and the way I look at "aesthetics" of literature and palatability politics. I remember how when we were really young, growing up in Bengal, a pretty popular consensus among the upper and upper-middle classes (even among some lower middle classes of savarna Hindu Bengalis) was that Ashapurna Devi is the go-to author for Bengali feminism and feminist themes, while Mahashweta Devi, outside of selective circles of academic and scholarly vested interests was seen more in an "inappropriate"/"controversial" or grimdark sense. Her novels and short stories always raised eyebrows among the cushy Kolkata babus, who felt "uncomfortable" with the coarse language and explicitly gratuitous details she provided in her work. When I read Shekhar's The Adivasi Will Not Dance when I was 17, I also thought, was it necessary to portray these brutalities so graphically? I was in high school, I did not know about palatability as a concept, and how it plays into dominant-group narratives back then.
And then I grew up, and read Limbale's text, and it was pretty much an eye-opener when he noted that savarnas judge all literature, including the literature of marginality, relative to their own specific lived contexts. This is not just for literature, but all aspects of Indian identity in practice, and it's not, to me, simply an indictment of the alt right, but the left too. Note that even the most self-congratulating Bengali (or Indian in general) leftism is imbued with respectability politics– no wonder, you wouldn't catch your average Kolkata babu mentioning Marichjhapi without crying about how it was all some intentional plot to deface Jyoti Basu.
What I'm trying to say is, if Mahashweta Devi made any "respectable" Bengali uncomfortable, wasn't that the point? Why must she depend on dominant-group aesthetics and mainstream ideas of "literary fiction" to depict military violence against Adivasi people or the Kolkata police brutalities during Naxalbari? Why must her dialogue be "polished"- aka a dialect comprehensible to majority groups? Why should she shy away from depicting abuse, rape and violence when the mainstream Indian media and the govt are doing their utmost best to erase such accounts when it concerns Adivasi or Dalit people?
And here's a twist: Mahashweta Devi was herself a Brahmin, she wasn't an Adivasi or a Dalit voice. So the whole Left condemning her works + BJP removing her writing alongside Dalit authors from university curriculum is just a testament to how fucked our literary scene is. No matter how much we are torn by party politics, two very different political ideologies came together to condemn one writer because God forbid she chose to portray Dalit and Adivasi resistance and rage. You can only imagine how India treats its Dalit authors too.
Anyway, this rant was brought to you by a recent literary discussion with some Bengali elders who were hellbent on convincing me that Mahashweta Devi isn't worth my time and I should pick up an Ashapurna Devi novel instead. So much for playing comrade comrade. No matter how much theory you can spout, it doesn't change that most Indian mainstream savarna politicians, writers and political ideologies are extremely hostile to anything that might remotely posit that they are not perfect in their victimhood. It is true, we do see everything in India from a point of "how does this oppress/marginalize me specifically" rather than "from what privileged perspective am I speaking on identities that my dominant group oppresses". The same is true for literature, and art. This is why we keep yapping on about the British Raj and reclaiming our lost jewels from the Museums but lose our heads when it comes to realising they are not the only Big Bad in Indian history.
Texts mentioned for anybody interested:
Sharankumar Limbale, Towards an Aesthetic of Dalit Literature: Histories, Controversies and Considerations, 2004
Hansda Sowvendra Shekhar, The Adivasi will Not Dance, 2015
Mahashweta Devi, various works including The Mother of 1084 and Draupadi
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fisheem4mmal · 2 years
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Short little thing of when Malleus first met Silver
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bruisedboys · 9 months
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❛ here, give this a try and tell me what you think. ❜ may i request baker reader who teases miguel by giving him a sweet kiss after trying what they made :)
thank you baby for the ask! I had heaps of fun writing this :) also I cheated and changed the dialogue a little bit oops
miguel o’hara x fem!reader, fluff, spoiler free!!! (also not proofread very well)
Miguel’s not an overly affectionate guy. He likes you, sure, but he keeps the physical affection to a minimum — he kisses you and touches you minimally when there are others around. He’ll hug you if you ask for it, he’ll hold your hand too, but only when it’s just the two of you alone. It’s not that he doesn’t like you, because he does, a lot, it’s just not his thing. Neither of you mind.
When it comes to your affections, however, Miguel is practically bombarded with them every waking second. And he says this in a very affectionate way, mind you. You’re always telling him he looks handsome. Always touching his chest or his arm, putting your hand in his hair (when he’s low enough that you can reach it). You’re not afraid of letting him know just how much you like him. It makes him weak in the knees, if he’s being honest.
You appear in Miguel’s lab slash office with the air of someone who’s excited and can barely hold it in. You’re bouncing on your feet and you’ve got your hands behind your back, hiding something.
“Hi, handsome,” you say, a happy lilt in your voice as you skip towards him.
Miguel bites back a smile. If he smiles, you’ll tease him for it, for sure. He tries not to sound too lovelorn when he says, “Hi,” back.
It doesn’t work. It’s probably the sappiest he’s ever sounded saying one single word. It’s hardly his fault. You’ve caught him at a bad time — he’d just been thinking about you and then you’d appeared. Very inconsiderate of you.
You stop a little way’s away from him and then make a show of pushing whatever you’ve got behind your back further out of sight. Miguel raises a brow.
“What are you doing here?” He asks.
You roll your eyes. “Am I not allowed to visit my boyfriend at work?”
The way you say ‘boyfriend’ makes Miguel’s heart feel funny. You’ve only just started calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. Before that it was coworkers, then acquaintances. then friends, then friends who kiss. Now he’s your boyfriend. It’s a new feeling. Not bad, just new.
“You’re allowed,” he says. “Of course you are.”
You beam then. It makes you look even prettier than you already are when you’re neutral-faced, your cheeks appled and plump, your eyes all crinkled at the corners. Happy you is his favourite you.
“Good,” you say. “‘Cos I brought you something.”
You take another step forwards and finally pull out the thing you’re hiding behind your back. It’s a Tupperware container with a blue lid. It’s decidedly ordinary, in Miguel’s totally unordinary work place. You step closer still and curl your fingers around the lid, pulling it up gently to reveal its contents.
Inside are a dozen or so chocolate chip cookies. Miguel looks at them, and then looks at you. You’re smiling shyly.
“I made them,” you explain, a shyness to your words that Miguel thinks is awfully adorable. “Thought you might be hungry.”
Miguel gets a very clear picture in his head of you in the kitchen, scooping cookie dough onto a tray, and thinks that maybe next time he’ll have to be there when you bake so he can kiss you stupid.
“Here,” you say , reaching for a cookie and breaking it in half. “Try this and tell me what you think.”
You hold out the cookie half to Miguel and he’d be an asshole if he said no to that. Plus, he can smell the sugar and the butter, and you’re right, he is hungry.
“Thank you,” he says, taking the cookie from your, his fingers brushing the back of your hand. You’ve got unbelievably nice hands. He thinks about it as he takes a bite of the cookie. Then he thinks about how good the cookie tastes. It’s caramel-y like you put a lot of butter in it, but he can taste salt too, and the chocolate is just dark enough that it’s not too sweet but still totally delicious.
“Good?” You ask, looking up at him hopefully.
Miguel swallows, then takes another bite pointedly. You giggle.
“It’s good?” You say excitedly. “I didn’t know if you liked dark chocolate, but it was all I could find.”
Miguel shakes his head. “It’s good,” he says. “Really good.”
You beam, looking like you can’t contain your glee. “Really? You like it?”
Miguel smiles at you. He’s feeling very fond right about now. And there’s no one around, so he reaches for your face and cups your cheek in his big hand. He stands over you and smiles in a way that Peter B. would definitely make fun of.
“Thank you,” he says, taking a step closer to you. “You don’t have to be so nice to me all the time, you know. Have you tried one?”
You shake your head. You’re decidedly silent, like you’re thinking about something but not saying what it is. You shuffle closer to him, the Tupperware container squished between your bodies.
“Lean down, would you, handsome?” You ask, a playful undertone to your soft request.
Miguel obliges. He’s pretty sure he knows where this is going. He leans down to a point where he knows you can reach and waits.
You look up at him for a moment. Then you push yourself onto your toes and kiss him, your hand pushing up against his chest to anchor yourself. Miguel’s hand latches onto your waist, fingers curling, subconsciously pulling you in. It’s a sweet kiss and Miguel wishes it would go on longer but you’re pulling away after only a few moments, smiling like a fool.
“What?” He asks, and your smile has caught on his lips, too.
“You taste good,” you say, giggling. “I think I did a pretty good job with the cookies.”
Miguel grins. “Really?” He drawls in a low voice, his tone borderline teasing, and your giggling subsides as he inches his face closer to yours. “Want another taste?”
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writingonleaves · 2 months
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things you never said (things you'll never say to me) - nico hischier
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pairing: nico hischier x original female character
warnings: swearing, sadness, angst, not my traditional fluff folks, very little dialogue, kinda a ramble disguised into a piece lol, google translated german, projection?? is that a valid warning
inspired by + title: "things i wish you said" by sabrina carpenter
word count: 2.8k
author's note: got into my feels randomly for this (incredible) song and decided to write something with it. also a part of @wyattjohnston 's lowkey loverfest 2k24!! hope you all enjoy this melancholy ride and please let me know what you think <3
*****
Nico Hischier has always been a leader. 
You ask anyone in Naters or Bern who knew him growing up and they would say the same thing — he’s a polite, young boy with so much talent and a sensible mind. He may be the youngest of three, but everyone’s always turned to Nico for guidance. With a calming voice paired with a warm smile, it’s rare for Nico to steer anyone wrong. 
And he sees it in himself too. Even when he was a rookie, when the C stitched into his jersey was only a blurred dream, he still felt like he had to lead by example. No one was expecting that of him, he knows that now, but he was a first overall pick, the weight of a losing team’s hopes on his shoulders. If he crumbled, those supporters’ hopes fell with him. His own hope would fall with him. 
It took a few years, a pandemic, another first overall pick, a shit ton of roster changes, a new coach and other things to walk into a locker room that wasn’t used to losing. And Nico prides himself as being a leader in that transition. C on his jersey or not, he would’ve done it. Because he doesn’t know how not to.
Leanna always said he didn’t know how to turn it off. 
When Nico had first met Leanna Spritz, it honestly was one of the worst first impressions he’s ever given. It was the morning after a brutal 6-1 loss against the fucking Flyers. The final score itself was bad, but the fact that it was against the Flyers rubbed more salt into the wound. He knew Lindy was gonna bag skate them all to hell and back the morning after and he just really wanted his cappuccino before to take away some of the bitterness. 
All up in his head, he had crashed literally into Leanna. Before they both could comprehend, her cold brew had spilled. Somehow, Nico got away with an unnoticeable splash on his hoodie and no spillage from his own drink. But Leanna wasn’t so lucky. Her brown sweater wasn’t dark enough to hide the fact that half of her cold brew was on it while the other spilled to the ground. 
“Fuck,” Nico had exclaimed, eyes widening and darting between her now coffee stained sweater, the empty cup on the ground and her red hair that only glistened with the sun rays. “Shit! I am so sorry. That’s totally my fault.”
Leanna had waved him away with a small chuckle as she dug into her purse for stray napkins. Far too nice for someone who now had coffee all over them because of him. “It’s okay. Mistakes happen.”
Nico looked at his watch and grimaced. Shit. He was going to be late to practice. And that would be even worse than usual with their horrible performance the night before. “Listen. I really want to buy you a coffee to make up for my clumsiness, but I’m gonna be late to work and-”
Leanna had nodded in understanding, lips quirked up. “Don’t worry about it. Promise. Go. Don’t be late for work.”
He had been so frazzled that all he remembered doing was blurting out another apology before practically running away, partially from embarrassment but also because he really did have to go. 
A week later, Nico went back to the coffee shop. In the back of his mind was the redhead who he still owed a coffee to. But Nico’s also realistic and he knew he’d probably never see her again. 
While he was patiently waiting in the long line, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He braced himself to interact with a fan, but turned around and was pleasantly surprised by who he did see. 
“I thought that was you,” she had said, pink beanie over her hair and a twinkle in her eye. “Not going to spill coffee again on me, are you? I’m wearing white today.”
Nico swallowed before his brain turned back on and he grinned. “Good eye. And no. I promise I’ll be less clumsy today. And I’m less in a rush.” They were next in line to order and he ordered first before turning to her. She had tried to deny him but he just raised an eyebrow until she gave the barista her order. 
“I’m really sorry again,” Nico said as they had shuffled out of line to wait for their drinks. “I hope the sweater didn’t stain.”
Leanna waved him off with her bright smile. “That sweater has been through too much for some coffee to ruin it. You don’t need to worry, Captain.”
Nico had been shocked that she knew who he was, which, in hindsight, is dumb. He’s not Jack, but he gets recognized a good amount around New Jersey still.
He cleared his throat. “Nico is fine.”
She smiled. “Okay, Nico. Well, I’m Leanna. Thank you for paying for my coffee. You didn’t have to, by the way, especially to clear your conscience.”
“That’s not why-well, it is. But I also, uh, are you in a rush?”
Nico remembers that day so well still, his English failing him despite living in North America for over five years as he basically asked Leanna on their first date right there and then. He remembers being thankful that she took some pity on him with her sweet smile and led them to a table. He probably would’ve stood there stuttering like a fool if she didn’t cut in.
“Nico?”
Nico blinks himself out of his memories as Jack walks into his living room. Sometimes he questions if he should’ve given Jack a key. 
“Hey. What’s up?”
“We have skate,” Jack gives him a look. “Dude, take a shower. Quickly. Or we’ll be late.”
“Right,” Nico says, stumbling over to the shower. As the water’s warming up, his eyes stop at a purple bottle tucked in the corner of the sink. Hair oil. Leanna always joked that she couldn’t live without it. His hands twitch to reach for the bottle just so he can smell the grapefruit scent, but he forces himself into the shower instead. 
He can hear Nina’s voice so clearly. Throw it away, she’d say in their mother-tongue that realistically Nico will never not be fluent in but sometimes is scared will slip away. Nina liked Leanna a lot, actually, the one time they met when she came to Jersey to visit last year. But Nina is also Nico’s sister, and cursed her name many times when Nico called her crying, waking her up in the middle of the night. She had stayed on the phone with him for three hours, letting him cry.
He forces himself to take a shower. To wake up a bit and shift his focus to the upcoming skate and game tonight. They’re playing the Rangers, which is just always a grind. He needs to be all in.
Nico keeps to himself while getting ready for practice, putting on his gear quietly while his teammates chatter about something or another around him. He speaks quickly to the equipment team about his skates and smiles in thanks. He catches a whiff of the perfume of their head of PR as she walks past in the hallway, and Nico swallows. 
Realistically, he knows it’s not the same one. But it’s floral and smells like jasmine, so it might as well be. 
As he’s driving home, he has the radio down low. He was never the one to fuss about putting his music on in the car. Because the world just works like that, a song that he doesn’t know the title to comes on. He hums along, because Leanna always played this song.
Instinctively, his fingers twitch to reach out to someone who won’t ever be in his passenger seat ever again. He can hear her voice, her thigh under his palm. It’s not safe to drive with one hand, she’d say with an amused laugh interlaced in her voice. He would always roll his eyes before giving her thigh a squeeze and keeping his hand there for the majority of their journey. 
He remembers that sentence bringing him comfort when they were driving to her sister’s house in upstate New York. He was scared shitless to meet her whole family for the first time to celebrate her cousin’s birthday. It was below freezing point outside, but his hands were so clammy that one would’ve thought it was summer. 
Leanna had put her hand in his hair at the nape of his neck. He had immediately calmed down. 
He swears if he focuses hard enough he can still smell the green tea shampoo Leanna used. It was always interesting to him, because the first thing he would think of when he saw her flaming red hair wasn’t green tea. It deserved something more bold attached to it. Like orange. Or vanilla. Or coconut.
Because Leanna was exactly that. Bold. Bright. Crashing into the lives of everyone in her path with her bright smile, loud laughter and a personality that sucked you in. 
Nico stops at a red light and absentmindedly looks to the right. His breath catches at the sight of a woman walking a beagle. Leanna always said that once she was more settled down, a beagle was the kind of dog she wanted to get, just like the dog she had by her side throughout her whole childhood. 
At one point, Nico had thought she meant settling down in Jersey. Never did she give the indication while they were together that she had meant London. 
He couldn’t force himself to unfollow Leanna on Instagram after the break-up. He catches himself way too often seeing if she still follows him. She does. And she even likes his posts most of the time. He checks.
Nico shouldn’t be surprised. Even though she cried so much when they broke up and he couldn’t handle it, through tears, she wished him nothing but the best. Even as she was actively breaking his heart.
As he pulls into the parking garage for his apartment complex, he kills the engine and just sits there. He should be focusing on the game tonight. Focusing on how they need to stop taking stupid penalties. Focusing on their positioning in the offensive zone. 
You think too much, honey. Leanna would say, kissing his forehead twice, something she started doing to calm him down. You just need to play hockey. Least that’s what you always tell me. Everything else will follow. 
And he would never admit it out loud — especially to Jonas — but he still repeats those words in his head. He’s not sure if it works, but it’s like a mantra. A routine. And hockey players know more than anyone how important routines are and how difficult they are to change. 
It’s been two months and three days. It’s annoying that Nico can still hear her voice in his head, clear as day. He hopes one day he’lll never be able to remember. But he also dreads the day that he’ll forget what she sounds like. 
He walks up into his apartment and pours out a glass of water, downing it in one go. The sun’s out for the first time in two weeks, and a small smile spills on his lips as he admires the sunlight through his glass windows. His eyes shift to a spot on one of the tables by the window on the right, where it seems like something is shining. His curiosity takes over and he walks over, a reminder popping into his brain that he needs to dust his apartment. Why does dust accumulate so quickly anyways? 
His stomach drops. One of her combs placed nonchalantly behind one of his plants. The shine is coming from the light hitting the red hair caught between the bristles. 
What the fuck?
Nico closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before hastily grabbing the comb and tossing it into the trash. She never officially moved in with him, but she was around the apartment enough to leave some things lying around here and there. He thought he had thrown everything out. Or more accurately, he trusted Jesper, Timo and Jack to do it for him during a particularly bad Saturday afternoon two weeks after everything fell to shit. 
He checks the time and sighs. He needs to nap or else everything will be thrown off. Checking his phone to make sure no one needs him, he plugs it in to charge by his bedside, ignoring a text from Nina he’ll answer when he wakes up.
It’s a text she sends a few times a week when she senses that her younger brother’s having a harder day. From almost 4,000 miles, she still knows. Nico’s always loved his sister, but he’s never felt more grateful to have her as he has in these last few months. 
eins zu zehn?? ❤️
One to ten, it translates to. On a scale of one to ten, how shitty or good are you feeling about it today? 
Nico sighs, responds back with a 6, and wills his mind to rest. 
Somehow, he wakes up decently well rested to his alarm. He stays in bed a few extra minutes, getting his mindset ready for gametime. He chooses to wear the gray three piece suit tonight. One of his more fancier fits. It is the Rangers, after all. 
It was Leanna’s favorite suit of his. She always joked he “ruined the look” when he slapped on his beloved white beanie. I love your hair. I wish you’d show it off more, she’d say.
He digs out the beanie from his clean laundry. 
He always leaves an hour or so to himself before he has to go to the rink. He usually spends it tidying up or doing things around his place to clear his head so he can come back after the game and just crash. 
Today, he replays the breakup in his mind. Or what he remembers of it, since he blocked a lot of it out. 
When you picture your future, do you see me in it at all? He had choked out, holding Leanna’s hands in his for what was the last time. 
It hadn’t helped that she had also been crying as she said her next words. Neeks, baby. It’s not you, it’s me. And I hate that I’m pulling that out, but it’s true. Maybe this isn’t the right time for us. 
Why can’t it be? Nico had said. Why can’t we make it work?
Maybe in the future, if things are different. She had said, biting her trembling lip. But even then, Nico knew they were empty promises. She’s too stubborn of a person to not bend the world her way. She just doesn’t want Nico to be a part of that world.
It’s not fair, he knows that realistically, but oftentimes he wonders if she ever loved him at all. That thought especially rode his mind after he saw her post a story on Instagram earlier last week. It was clearly a soft launch, with her hand in the hand of some faceless guy over dinner. Nico ended up scoring two goals that night out of sheer adrenaline and anger. 
Because all he’s ever wanted was for Leanna Spritz to be happy. Even now. Even after all of this. Even if it’s not with him. 
But fuck, she’s clearly moving on. Why can’t he?
He blinks, collapsing on his couch in the living room and staring at the wall. The last time he heard from her was a month ago, when he had gone down after a rough hit during a game against Minnesota. He ended up only being out for the next two games, but the hit hadn’t been pretty. His chest had taken the brunt of the damage. Everyone, including him, had been relieved that it wasn't more serious.
While he was getting checked out by the trainers the next morning, his phone had buzzed and he almost threw up. 
Leanna Spritz✨
I saw the hit last night. Hope you’re okay. Listen to the trainers. 
Nico was angry. What right did she have to text him that? 
But then, he just felt sad. That bottomless pit in his stomach opened up. He felt nothing but emptiness. 
His phone buzzes, this time with a text from Timo, and Nico takes a deep breath. It’s game time. No more crying over his ex-girlfriend. 
As he’s sliding on his beanie in the bathroom, he catches sight of the hair oil again. He picks it up, smells it, before throwing it in the trash. It lands on the bottom of the can with a final thud. He clicks all the lights off, makes sure he has everything he needs, grabs his key off the hook and shuts the door. 
Two hours later, everyone’s getting hyped up. He gives a mini impromptu speech, Jack slaps his back way too hard and Nico smiles, dimples and all.
He takes a deep breath before his blades touch the ice.
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slayingfiction · 1 year
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What would your advice for just-starting-out young authors be?
I love new writers! I’ve never known a better way to escape my reality and live a thousand different lives.
I started writing when I was young, maybe 12 or 13 years old. I am now 25, and very much consider myself to be a child, but still, in my 10+ years of personal writing and classes, here are some of the best tips I can give anyone who is new to writing, regardless of age.
Read. Read. Read. Then read some more. The easiest and fastest way to learn how to write is by reading and studying how other people have written their stories. Study their balance of dialogue vs description vs action. Study the words they use and what they’re choosing to describe. Study the scenes that make you feel something, or pull you to the story even more, and dissect it until you understand how to do it.
Daydream. At night, in the morning, before and after school, during school, during work. When people are trying to talk to you, just daydream. Image worlds with populated moons. Imagine worlds with multiple human-like species all living in the same area. Image a boy who goes home and cries to his adoptive vampire parents, and girls who practices knife throwing every night to prepare for the apocalypse that no one sees coming. Dream of everything and anything because that’s how you keep and improve your creativity. Eventually you may even write something with it.
Write for yourself. Always start by writing what you enjoy, and love your characters and your stories. Everything about your first draft should be because you love the story, not what other people like. You will never please everyone, so start with yourself, and build a community with the ones who love your story as much as you do.
Do it on your own timeline. If you want to write a book in a month, edit the next and publish right after, do it. If you want to write the first five chapters of 8 books without finishing, do it. If, like me, you want to write your first novel at 18 years old, and 7 years later still not feel ready to publish, that’s ok! You are not falling behind anyone else, you are exactly where you should be on your own path.
Practice. Your writing will improve with practice, that’s how it works, it’s how it always works. No way to skip right to publishing a first draft and becoming famous for it. Practice and just keep writing, you will improve.
Challenge yourself. While you may love fantasy or romance, or maybe all your story ideas are too big for only one book and they all end up being series’, you need to try new things. Write a mystery short story. Write poetry on how you feel. Write one page on how you could survive a zombie apocalypse as long as you have your coffee in the morning, it doesn’t matter, just try new things. Trying new things is how I wrote this haiku: Take a deep inhale, Breathe fresh air into my lungs, I savorfreedom. Is it the greatest haiku ever? No, but it makes me happy, and reminds me that I can write, good or bad, and still be proud of myself.
Keep all your projects. Good or bad. Look back on them years later and think, yeah that was terrible, at least I’m better now. Or maybe think, this wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. It’s a progressive journey. You can take your time. DONT EVER SHAME YOUR YOUNGER SELF FOR THEIR WORK. THEY TRIED THEIR HARDEST AND WROTE AS BEST THEY COULD. WE ARE PROUD OF OURSELVES, NOT EMBARRASSED OR SHAMED. Whether the work is from years ago or days go. Be kind to yourself, no one else owes you that.
Compare. Compare to popular novels, compare to your friends stories or to people online. Compare and see if your character are developed enough, or if your story makes sense, or if it’s relatable. When comparing however, keep in mind that your written style will be different than all others writers. Your first novel will not be the same as an author’s 10th book that just went viral on TikTok. It takes practice and time. Compare for style, technique, structure and plot. Not for popularity, worth, importance, and don’t feel down thinking that someone writing at a higher grade level makes them better, it doesn’t.
Share your work. If you are embarrassed, use a pen name. That’s perfectly fine. Put your work out there and get feedback. Having one person saying your story is (negative criticism here) is going to happen, don’t freak out. It doesn’t mean your story is flawed and should be tossed. If most people are saying that, then maybe it’s time to revisit the story and plot. Getting feedback from people reading your story is important, you want to ask specific questions so you don’t get generic answers. Get real reviews from real people, the mean voice in your head doesn’t get a say.
Learn the difference between perfect and done. I know, I know. Perfectionists around the world just scoffed and thought ‘I would if I could’. Here’s the thing, it’ll never be perfect. A word won’t be right, you can’t find the right way to convey an emotion, your choice of vocabulary isn’t up to your standards, I get it. You want your work to be absolute perfection so that everyone loves it and no one can say a bad thing about it, but it doesn’t work that way. Instead make it to ‘complete’, then nitpick some details, then it’s done. Done is good, it’s where you want to be.
Self-publishing? Pay for a professional editor and a graphic designer. It makes a difference, I promise.
There’s lots of others, but I would say as a writer-starter-pack, these should get you started, then you will learn lessons all on your own, or find them as you’re writing later on. Truly, just have fun, and the rest will come with time.
Happy Writing!
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Oppenheimer / immediate thoughts
ok nolan fans let's talk, i just got back.
i am very well acquainted with 20th century american history but i did not do any additional research on oppenheimer the man or the trinity test because i wanted to be surprised by the movie's narrative and imagery, so keep that in mind as you read. i'm not fact-checking for the time being... i want to go do my own reading at my leisure when it's not past midnight.
DON'T GO SEE IT IN IMAX. SAVE YOUR MONEY AND A HEADACHE. it's not inception or dunkirk or the batman films or interstellar. just go to your local theater or wait until it's available to stream. trust me on this. i'll explain why in the spoilers section below.
YOU'RE BEING WARNED. SPOILERS AHEAD.
-this was the least nolan-y film that nolan has ever made. i see more of following in it (his very first film) than i do any other project. it was definitely a bit of a different direction for him.
-this is basically a biopic of sorts about oppenheimer. it's not about the war nor is it really about the bomb. it's about an awkward, conflicted, and possibly mentally ill physics genius who seems to not know how to do much in life beyond quantum physics theory. like yes, he's got a brilliant mind, but he's far from a well-rounded, impressive human being. the guy was a hot mess long before anyone mentioned the word bomb.
-taking that into consideration, i can see how the suffering of humans (whether the navajo nation in new mexico, or the japanese people) doesn't play a role in the film. japanese victims are mentioned, but briefly in one scene. that doesn't make any of this right. in fact a more entertaining, eye-opening, and timely film should have included more of both - but i see now that nolan wanted to focus on ONE man and cillian is indeed in practically every. single. scene.
-cillian should be nominated for an oscar and win it.
-humans are very complex and you CAN both build the bomb AND feel bad about it, yes it's entirely possible and normal, but the film is still 3 hours of white guilt. i'm openly saying it. the reason you shouldn't see it in imax is because it's 3 hours of middle aged white men sitting around making terrible decisions. it's SO MUCH TALKING, jesus.
-IMAX cameras are stupidly loud, which is why most filmmakers don't use them. you can't hear dialogue. they're for action scenes. so that very much explains why i was just ITCHING for subtitles on this. so many different accents and everyone mumbling and the score was louder than their voices and ARGHHH nolan why.
-female characters are unremarkable and underused. i know nolan and i know how he uses female characters. at this point i'm convinced he just doesn't know how to write them, and he can only work with male-driven stories and you know what... fine. it is what it is. unless he brings female writers on board, nothing will change, because he can't do it himself.
-why are there sudden bare tiddies in a nolan film. fanboys, did u love it? did u get what u wanted? was that it? finally, a sex scene in a nolan film? it added nothing and i could argue it took some things away. sorry folks. entirely unnecessary.
-ok THE BEST PART was the surprise cameos. cillian was in every scene and yet he was the least famous person among big oscar winners sometimes! it was wild! i was internally screaming at gary oldman as harry truman. excellent choice to play him like the clown he was. AND EINSTEIN??? did y'all catch that or no??? i knew it right away from the voice and the kind eyes. it's the GUY FROM THE PIT IN THE DARK KNIGHT RISES. he helps bruce recover, and narrates the ascent of "the child". terrific casting! and i haven't checked IMDB yet, but is borden (not named after the character from the prestige!) played by the arkham patient from the dark knight? the one who gets shot in the leg and interrogated by harvey dent?? tell me i am recognizing the right guy! and then we had matthew modine... casey affleck... rami malek who appeared for like 3 mins maybe?! AND Y'ALL, JOSH HARTNETT????????????????? OMG my biggest crush when i was 15. that was craaaazy. but i do like seeing nolan bring back his friends... it's very much a nolan circle as we all know. and once you're in it, you're in it!
-the use of sound was VERY GOOD. the explosion actually being silent, because light reaches us before sound? but also the way the buildup was so intense and so hyped up and then just.... complete silence to reflect on the monstrosity being produced, and how nothing will be the same.
-there was a lot of train sounds to emphasize the railroad, but also... anyone notice that the stomping noise in oppenheimer's head almost felt like a train was coming through? TELL ME YOU DIDN'T THINK ABOUT COBB'S GUILTY CONSCIENCE IN INCEPTION, and how a train would ram through the dream. nolan doing an homage to himself is absolutely hysterical and i am here for it i guess.
-i'm not sure how audiences abroad will feel about all the scenes in washington with congressional testimony. does that stuff carry over well? do you get the references? it's such inside baseball, i know, and it adds so much time to the film, and yet MORE scenes with middle aged white men talking. i could have done with less of the black and white "present day" scenes and more about the impact of the bomb, or maybe more about kitty's life and how she overcame her (presumed?) alcoholism and depression.
-the casual discussion about the 11 cities shortlisted to drop the atomic bomb "but not kyoto because of its cultural importance" made people laugh in the theater as intended, but honestly like... nothing in the movie is funny. it's really heavy stuff and i still stand by the fact that the bomb should never have been produced, despite what oppenheimer and others tried to say. because even its production is incredibly dangerous. it's not just about where you fucking drop it.
-did i mention there is too much matt damon. like, too much.
-rami malek is the only person of color with a speaking role in this film. that's right.
-ok what else guys??? i wanna hear thoughts. there's a lot more but i'm so tired at this hour
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Note
Hello:)
so I was looking thru ur pinned post and saw that u wrote for Harry Potter and was wondering if you would do a fic for George Weasley? ( fem reader pls) but basically, I was just kind of thinking of an introverted Gryffindor who loves books and George meets them and they both (very obvious to others) have a crush on each other? Maybe George just asks them for book recs even tho he had no interest in reading before just so he can find a way to talk to the reader? I know you have a lot of fics in the making so take ur time please<3
A HP REQUEST?? This is amazing I'm so excited to be branching out from maze runner again, and I absolutely love this request it's super cute ❤❤. Ty for being so kind and sweet as well :)
Umm :D So I wrote the above ^^^ response as soon as the request came in and now... IT'S BEEN TWO MONTHS IM SO SORRY ANON!! Hope you're still out there to read 😭
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It's a love story
George Weasley x fem!reader
I am not British *thumbs up in australian* so prepare either for out-of-place non-british dialogue or cringe attempts to fit into the universe. idk which one it's gonna be so I guess we'll find out
3.1k words
Warnings: language (swearing)
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You turn the corner and register a flash of red hair before colliding hard with a body.
"Shit!"
You groan as you sit up, staring around to see your books have been knocked out of your arms and onto the floor.
"Fuck, sorry, listen I've gotta-"
"Weasley!"
You turn in surprise as Filch marches down the corridor, fist raised with an expression of rage on his face.
"Shit," you whisper.
"Yeah," says the person who knocked you over, who you've now found is none other than George Weasley. Of course, the guy you've kinda sorta maybe liked for years is only talking to you after literally bowling you over.
"Here." He points his wand and charms all your books into little palm-sized rectangles, before gathering them up and stuffing them in his pockets. "We've gotta go."
"Where?" you stare around the empty corridor, unable to find a decent hiding spot.
"Follow me." George leads you over to a dusty-looking tapestry and ducks behind it.
"What the-"
"Come on!" he reaches out and grabs your hand, tugging you in.
You stumble through the gap between the tapestry and the wall, practically falling into George's chest.
"Sorry," you mutter, and you're glad it's dark because you can feel your face blushing like crazy.
"I know you're 'round 'ere, Weasley," you hear Filch snarl from outside.
You hear him muttering to himself as his footsteps eventually recede, and you let out a breath. "He's gone."
You turn to push through the tapestry to get out, only to be met with a thin slab of solid stone. "What-"
George winces. "Yeah, once you get in here it closes for about half an hour."
"Half an hour?" you repeat incredulously.
You can barely see his nod in the dark. "I mean, one of them closes for two hours once you get in, so half isn't too bad."
There's beat of silence, before, "Lumos."
The tip of George's wand lights up, illuminating the small space. "Oh, it's you," he says, seemingly on instinct the moment the light appears.
"Pardon?"
He seems to catch himself, shaking his head. "Nevermind, just- Here, sit down."
You sit down on the floor with your legs crossed, heart skipping a beat as your knee brushes against his in the cramped space.
"We're in the same Transfiguration class, aren't we?" asks George.
"I- yeah." You're pleasantly surprised by that. You tend to be pretty quiet in class, mostly keeping to yourself.
"You're always the first person to get a new transfiguration successfully. Bird to glass on the first try, right?"
"I- yeah," you say, warming at the recognition of the hard work you've always put into Transfiguration.
He nods. "Took me the whole lesson to get that one right. Hey, I never caught your name in class?"
"It's L/n," you say. "Y/n L/n."
"Good to meet ya, Y/n," he grins. "I'm George."
"I know," you can't help but say, smiling slightly.
"Oh, your books." George empties his pockets of your miniaturised books. "Engorgio." He waves his wand over them, changing them back to their normal size.
"Thanks," you say, pulling them towards you and stacking them up.
"You read a lot?"
You smile to yourself, picturing the dozens of books you go through in a term. "Just a bit."
"Sure," says George, eyeing the four novels sitting in front of you now.
Before long, you reach out and push against the tapestry, finding it to be cloth again instead of stone.
"Time to go?" George stands and pushes through, and you follow him into the corridor.
"Finally," you say, stretching before grabbing your books.
"Sorry about earlier," says George with a sheepish smile. "And for trapping you for half an hour."
You shake your head. "It's okay."
He grins at you. "Alright then, see you 'round Y/n."
You stand still, rooted to the ground as he leaves, waving behind him, and something in you clicks. Oh shit.
⭒----⭒
Any thoughts about George a put aside for the night when you settle down with your book.
The common room late at night is your happy place. Most people are sleeping in the dorms, save for a couple 6th years finishing their assignments.
You tune out their little whisperings as you sit beside the crackling fire, and you can just pretend you're alone in the common room, getting lost in your book.
Before long, you're actually alone, with the remaining people all retreating to their dorms - except for one that you haven't noticed.
George is sitting across the room, barely paying attention to the essay he's meant to be editing. Every so often, he glances up at you without you noticing.
After years of sharing the same Transfig class, something about you has piqued George's interest, though he's always tried to mark it down as pure curiosity.
He can't believe it's taken literally knocking you to the ground to get your attention, and he doesn't understand how he hadn't properly met you before earlier that day. But now, he can't seem to resist the strange pull you have on him.
Get yourself together, you've only met once, idiot. George frowns as he silently berates himself, but he can't help but watch as you repeatedly flick away a strand of hair that keeps falling into your eyes.
Fuck it. Go talk to her.
George stands abruptly, nearly knocking over a goblet in the process.
You, the oblivious centre of all his thoughts for the past few hours, are still just sitting beside the fire, reading your book.
"Hey."
You jerk slightly in surprise, grabbing your book as it starts sliding out of your lap.
"Um, hi. What's up?" you manage to say coolly.
George blanks. He hadn't exactly come in with a plan. He glances down at the assignment he'd been working on; good enough. "Did you finish that work Flitwick gave us?"
"I haven't yet," you say slowly, slightly confused as to why he's here. "I've just gotta write a conclusion and edit the rest."
"I haven't got a clue how to write the damn conclusion," says George, flopping down beside you and complaining about the rigid essay structure.
You realise as he's talking that it's strangely intimate. Earlier, you'd been sitting on the floor with your back leaning on a couch and your knees up, braced against the coffee table.
Now, you're both wedged between said couch and table, and despite the generous space between the two of you, you feel oddly close to him.
"Can I read yours?" he asks, pointing to where your assignment has been sitting since you gave up and decided to just read your book.
"Sure," you say, sliding it to him.
He leans against the couch as he skims your work, fingers tapping absent-mindedly.
"God you write like a professor, Y/n," comments George. "...the fuck are all these words- incandescence?"
"I... read a little," you say with a little smile, cheeks warming at the way your name sounds in his mouth.
He glances up at you. "This is brilliant. So you've just got the conclusion to do?"
You nod, taking back the assignment as he pushes it to you.
You end up staying up way longer than you'd intended, talking to George as the conversation topic quickly strays away from any Charms essays.
By the time you go to your dorms, you haven't even finished your conclusion.
⭒----⭒
"Mate, you're not nearly as subtle as you think you are," says Fred, elbowing his brother.
George elbows him right back. "What're you on about?"
"The staring," says Fred, grin teasing. "It's getting embarrassing. If whatever little crush you've now got starts affecting my reputation, we're gonna have to have a chat about this twin thing."
George rolls his eyes. "Git."
"So..." Fred drags out the word. "Who is it then?"
He jerks his chin towards the group of girls on the other side of the Gryffindor breakfast table, where George had been conspicuously staring at you all morning.
"The one on the left - Y/L/N, she's in our Transfig class."
"Oh!" says Fred, eyes lighting up in understanding. "Oh she's great, I did a project with her once. Quiet type, bookish. Fun, though. Pretty, too," he adds, raising an eyebrow at George.
"Shut it," retorts George. "What should I do then?"
"I don't fuckin' know Georgie, just go talk to her. Ask for book recommendations or something."
"That's... actually a decent idea."
" 'course it is," says Fred. "Anything to get you guys together as fast as possible so I don't have to deal with your lovesick horsecrap."
⭒----⭒
A Quidditch game has just finished (Gryffindor victory, of course), and you're avoiding the inevitable party in the common room. You can enjoy parties on a good day, but you're just not feeling it right now.
So you're in the library, wandering around as you wait for dinner.
"Y/n!" You turn to see George doing a weird half-run toward you, not wanting to be yelled at for running in the library.
"Oh, George. Hey."
"I figured you'd be in here," he says.
"You figured...?"
"Well," he raises an eyebrow at you. "Since you read a little."
You huff out a soft laugh, shaking your head. "So why were you looking for me?"
You try to listen as he speaks, but you're immediately distracted by just about everything about him.
His cheeks are flushed red, probably cause he just transitioned from the cold outside to the heated library, and his hair is windswept and slightly wet from melted snowflakes.
He's gotten rid of his Quidditch gear, but it's strange to see him in just the casual clothes students usually wear in the dorms and common room again.
And he's still speaking. Pay attention, Y/n.
"Anyways, I just wanted to find you, cause you know, hobbies... and literature, are really... important. And the Christmas holidays are coming up. So I just wanted to ask if you had any recommendations."
You frown slightly as you remember it's only the start of November, and he barrels on, almost seeming nervous.
"For books, I mean. To read, over the holidays. I don't, uh- come in here very often, so I don't know what's good. You seemed like a good person to ask." He scrubs a hand over the back of his neck as he speaks, giving you a hopeful smile.
"I am," you say with a smirk. You straighten up confidently, banishing any nervousness because books; books you can do.
"Great," says George. "What've you got for me, Y/L/N?"
"Well what kind of books do you like?"
His grin falters. "Um-"
"Fiction, non-fiction, stories, biographies?"
"...stories?"
"Sure." You navigate to another aisle, moving into the more fiction-y section. "Action, ooh- historical, adventure, romance?" You lift an eyebrow at the last one.
"I-" He clears his throat, and you smile slightly to yourself. "Action is good, I think," he says uncertainly.
You scan the shelf currently at your eye level, before picking out a book. "I love this one," you tell him. "Pretty fast paced, which might be good for you. Also, dragons."
"Dragons," he repeats. "Great."
"How many books are you looking for?" you ask.
"Just one, I think. I wanna... get into reading, before the holidays start."
"Sure," you say, holding the book out to him.
It's like sun breaking through, when he smiles in return. "Do you think we could meet up?" he begins. "To talk about the book once I've read it?"
"Yeah, I'd like that," you smile. "And you have to tell me what you like, so I can recommend you the next one."
"Excellent."
⭒----⭒
Ever since giving George that first book you've started seeing him almost every day.
The two of you can be found huddled together in the little nooks around the library, or behind the greenhouses, or down by the lake, talking about books and school and everything in between.
But soon the holidays arrive, and you're saying goodbye to him and the rest of your friends.
Your parents are being forced to travel a lot over Christmas for work, so the first month of the holiday flies by in a whirlwind of tea in the morning with the few remaining students in Hogwarts, long peaceful walks on the grounds, and lots and lots of reading.
You've devoured a row of books in the library by the time Christmas has passed, and you've planned to go through another row, when George materialises in the common room one day, two weeks after Christmas.
"George?" you exclaim, spotting him in the common room.
He turns as he hears your voice, and his face splits into a wide grin. Without hesitation, he runs up to you and pulls you into a hug, lifting you just slightly above the floor.
Your heart swells as his laughter rings in the air, and suddenly everything is complete.
"I missed you so much," you tell him, almost surprised at your own admission. Truth is, Hogwarts is beautiful during Christmas, but it's a little lonely with everyone else having gone home.
George's responding smile is worth the wait though, and he tosses an arm around your shoulder as he leads you out of the common room.
"C'mon, it's a Hogsmeade day. No time to waste!"
⭒----⭒
The two of you settle down at a table in the Three Broomsticks, grabbing Butterbeers as you go.
"Alright then, Weasley. Did you get through the holiday book I got you?"
He smiles. "I did. And you know what I was thinking when I read it?"
"What?"
"Y/n would hate Chaolie, and she'd love Alosia."
You blink in surprise. "I- yeah, those are my exact thoughts on the book."
George smirks. "See? I know you."
"I mean yeah, I loved every chapter Alosia was in; she's my favourite. Typical, I know, everyone likes the side characters, but god, Allo would've been so much better as a main character than fucking Chaolie. G.T.L. is brilliant- we know that, she fits insane arcs and storylines into a single book, but please,-"
George listens, a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth, as you continue rambling animatedly about the book, your hands gesturing enthusiastically as you speak.
"And the cover: gorgeous. You know stories like this can have the silliest cover art if they're not done well, and the choice to go almost muggle-style with a non-moving cover is perfect."
You brush a stray piece of hair away from your face, oblivious to the way George tracks the movement, desperately wanting to reach out and tuck it behind your ear for you.
The bell on the door chimes and you look over George's shoulder to see a bunch of familiar redheads walking in.
"Ah, Y/n," says Fred, floating towards your table. "Lovely to finally see you again after having to hear so much about you over Christmas."
You giggle as George thumps his brother with his book, face turning almost as red as his hair. "Stupid- git."
"This is the Y/n?" says Ron, another one of George's brothers.
His sister joins in too. "Ah, so you're the reason we had to come back early."
"Early?" you repeat, confused.
"Enough," snaps George. "Piss off, all of you," he says, fruitlessly shoving his siblings away from your table.
He groans. "Come on Y/n, we're leaving." He tugs on your hand, and you snort as his family's antics as you down the last sip of Butterbeer and hop off your seat.
"Until we meet again, Y/n." Fred salutes you as you exit, and you laugh as you wave to the rest of the Weasleys.
"Sorry about them," says George, slightly pink in the cheeks.
"Don't worry," you laugh. "It's fine. But what did Ginny mean when- hey!"
You're cut off as George yanks off his scarf and starts wrapping it around your neck and face. "...It's cold out," he explains weakly as you give him a look.
You pin him down with your gaze, and he sighs. "Fine."
He grabs your hand and leads you away from the Three Broomsticks, brushing snow off a park bench before sitting down.
Every memory he's had with you, every moment he's spent falling for you, flashes through his head.
The shy smile you had in your first few days of meeting, which he could only describe as cute, the mischievous glint in your eye when you'd almost recommended him a romance book, your laugh that he's memorised the sound of... damn it, he better not fuck this up.
You sit down beside him, giving him a concerned look.
"Okay, here it is," he says abruptly. "I like you."
You blink, caught off guard.
"You're so- you're bright," he says. "There's this light in you, and it's so fucking bright, and people don't see it. I don't get that. But whatever, they don't matter. I just mean, I've been pretty much blinded by you since we met... well, since I knocked you over running from Filch. I- god, fuck this metaphor. The point is, every time I'm not with you, I'm just wishing that I was. Cause I like you, and I wish- I'd hoped, that maybe you like me back?"
You're still silent, your brain trying to catch up with what your ears are hearing.
But George takes the silence differently. "It- it's okay if you don't. You know, I don't want to pressure you, at all. It's completely-"
"George." You take his hand. "I like you too, so damn much. I was just... I've never done this before. I didn't know if I should ask you out, or confess, or anything."
George lets out an incredulous breath. "Oh. Well then."
He rests his forehead against yours. "Y/n, will you do me the great honour of becoming my girlfriend."
You're smiling so much it almost hurts. "I'd love to," you whisper.
⭒----⭒
It's only on your first date, that you realise; "You know, we've practically be dating this whole time."
"What do you mean?" asks George, digging into his icecream.
"Meeting up, just the two of us. We've been doing it for ages, except we thought it was just book meetings."
The spoon stills halfway to George's mouth. "...fuck."
You snort, "We're both idiots, aren't we."
"Could've saved me so much grief if I'd known we were already dating. It was well shit, overthinking everything over the holidays."
"You mean when you missed me so much you convinced your whole family to come back to school early?"
"Sod off," he replies, nudging your foot and grinning. "You thought it was cute, anyway."
"I did."
There's a beat, before; "Kissing," you say, pointing your spoon at him. "We weren't totally dating, cause we didn't kiss."
"Right," agrees George, nodding. "Speaking of..."
You let out a laugh, setting your icecream down on the table, and then you let him pull you in.
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Silly details cause I can't help myself: Alosia is a music project by dodie, Chaolie is based on Chaol from tog (sorry), and GTL is the fictional author from Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. Thank you for tolerating my self-indulgent easter eggs.
Thank you for reading, everyone! Hope you enjoyed my first fic in the HP universe <3
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icarusallusion · 17 days
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Gray Fox's last words in both games will always be so important to me in understanding him as a character in whole. Especially his relationships with war and people and how he views them
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Starting with this dialogue about Big Boss.
These are Frank's dying words and he uses them to praise Big Boss. These lines and their relationship shows Frank's devotion and loyalty on it's own. Countless times he has left friends, family, and lover behind to pursue Big Boss and his goals. This, while not a very healthy attachment, does speak greatly about what kind of a man Frank is and how devoted he can be.
Because he is not just devoted to Big Boss, he is also devoted to Solid Snake, he doesn't want Snake to die, he feels bad about betraying FOXHOUND, and he feels bad about lying to him in general. He pretended to be "#1 Fan" just so he didn't have to fully betray Snake. Not to mention Metal Gear Solid, but he's practically overjoyed at the chance to die in front of Snake and for him to be his means of death, while sickening in context with the experimentations it's incredibly showing how much they mean to each other. Also his clear devotion to Gustava, He risks getting arrested or killed just to be with the woman he loved. Frank is a character that is immensely devoted to people, but it does tend to rule out to Big Boss being the most important it still says a lot. It is also something that ruins him in the process, he dies for Big Boss and he destroys the relationships he has outside of Big Boss, which is also why I think he's so attached to David as well but I'll save that for some other post.
These lines also show Frank's values towards morality and loyalty, before this he says along the line of "I am in an awkward position [unlike snake]" he is pretty much saying that he's in-between peace and Big Boss. These, combined with the dialouge after it, imply that Frank fully understands Snake's amnesty towards Big Boss. He does see that Big Boss is bad, and why people do not like him. This shows off his devotion can cloud his morality, he still fully believes in a what's right and what's wrong but that dependency on Big Boss stumps it.
Scooting away from his last words to talk about his second last moments in Metal Gear Solid.
Fox : Snake, we're not tools of the government or anyone else! Fighting was the only thing... the only thing I was good at, but... At least I always fought for what I believed in.
This is almost a clearcut show of his morale, he fought because he was desperate to cling to war but he never lost sight of his values. While his values aren't very expanded on in themselves, the fact he clings to them as much as he does, does stand out to me. A clear show of determination that's been muddied by violence. He sides with both FOXHOUND and Zanzibar in his own way, as he understands the good purpose of FOXHOUND but sees Big Boss in Zanzibar and ultimately that loyalty makes his morality hazy and destroys the relationship he had with FOXHOUND.
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Frank shows a very heartbreaking attitude towards war and also furthers the last point.
that he fully knows war is bad, Big Boss is not good, etc. I am always so glad when bad guys aren't written blind to the good in the world 🙌
Frank outright says he despises war, he shows this attitude a lot throughout his life. Even as a teen, he expressed his disgust at the death caused by war. He takes in a young Naomi to prevent the war from making an influx on her. He is incredibly caring to those suffering from battle filled places, yet due to the constant conditioning he has faced he's forced to constantly bring himself back into battlefield.
To Frank, war is an addiction. As a baby, he's in wartorn Vietnam kept in a camp, as a child he's in wartorn Africa trafficked as a soldier, and as a teenager he's in wartorn San Hieronymo memory wiped. When he is saved by Big Boss all these times, he ends up scooped back up into war anyway. When he's an adult and with Big Boss, he still chooses war. It's an incredibly saddening cycle that his character goes through.
However, to Frank, conflict and battle acts as a comfort to him. It's all that he knows and all he's grown up with that he cannot bring himself to separate from it.
When he's happy with Gustava, he still finds a way to break the law and accidentally ruin Gustava, still thinking like a soldier. I think this behavior also stems to Big Boss as well, Frank is happy with Big Boss, views him as his hero, but when describing him, he's just his CO that saved him a few times when there's so much more to their relationship. It makes me think Frank, as a soldier, already regards CO as an important role because he's stuck with thinking like a soldier that he can't see Big Boss past military ranking. Same with Solid Snake, Snake regards Frank as his best friend, while Frank always sticks to calling him Snake or rookie. It's always codenames or ranks for Frank.
Comparing himself to the children of Zanzibar also stuck out to me. While, Gray Fox is certainly not childish, he does have some child wonder and impulsivity that undoubtedly stem from the fact he'd never had a chance to grow up properly. He makes several impulsive decisions where he doesn't think about the consequences of what he does, this could also come from that same exact soldier mentality.
Also on the topic of the kids in Zanzibarland, the small dialogues they have about Big Boss is something that reminds me of how Gray Fox himself speaks about Big Boss, albeit he says it in a more jaded way but I feel that's really only because we see him as a teen and the Zanzibarland kids are like five.
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Into the suicidal behaviors of Frank. In his life, he's on autopilot for most of it and when he's not, he's hurting others or he's hurting himself. He shows a deeply depressive attitude in life.
Within Portable Ops, he says: "You help me fill the void inside" towards Big Boss, describing his own self as a void showed how he felt his life had no meaning, including the whole null motifs, literally calling himself nothing always stuck with me. His impulsive behavior also stands out. While his impulsivity probably comes from the instinct of a soldier, sometimes it comes across as just suicidal. Piloting and fighting with a metal gear when he's never done so in his life, trying to elope with a woman in an authoritarian Czechoslovakia, killing Gene's staff, etc etc. Some actions he takes could end up killing him, having him tortured and he doesn't care about consequences.
Scooting away again to mgs1..
Liquid says this: "Foolish man! He prayed for death and it found him." While Liquids words can't express Frank's feelings it is a generally accurate statement, throughout his life Frank finds death and destruction and it follows him everywhere. This leads him down his own path of wanting to die, not actively but a passive auto pilot thought of knowing one day he will die and hoping it's in battle. While not a typical suicidal thought, hoping for death in whatever way definitely counts.
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Onto more with his relationship with David, because it's always the moments when Frank is the realist. David is highly impressionable when he first meets Frank, probably one of his first few real friends after foster care and green berets. Frank himself regards their friendship highly. The last few words exchanged between them before they talk about Gustava: "I will never be like you" it always struck me and the way Frank just accepts that, he knows he's not a good role model anymore, not to anyone by how he talks about Naomi in MGS1.
David looked up to Frank, that much is evidenced by Kasler saying how everyone loved and looked up to Frank in FOXHOUND and how every opportunity he can Snake brings up Frank's advice. Metal Gear 2 shows the final crumbling of Frank, he's tries his hardest to have that moral compass, to be a sense of good to the war orphans he comes across, to his peers, and to his subordinates in FOXHOUND, but then in 1999 it fizzles away and he's fully accepted the fate laid out for him.
It's incredibly depressing but accurate. Frank is a veteran, he's fought enough wars and solemnly accepts his death. I think killing Gustava, and fighting Snake were turning points for him. Especially realizing Big Boss was most likely going to die in Zanzibar. He forces himself away from all parts of his life that made him whole so that he can accept death.
All in and all, Frank's last words in both Metal Gear 2 and Metal Gear Solid crack open a lot of depth into his character that so many people I've found ignore. The original Metal Gears tend to get overlooked but dive so deep into the characters that it's so shocking when so many fans haven't played or watched it. MG is the baseline for understanding Gray Fox and I find so many people boiling him down to himself in Metal Gear Solid when he's so impactful in Portable Ops, in Metal Gear 2, like please show Frank love because he will always be one of the most impactful characters to me
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cerastes · 8 months
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While I agree on her leveraging parental responsibility and collaterals as a threat (plus Doctor is pretty much stated as being able to live with very few comforts despite their love for them meaning material things at the end of the day matter mostly from practical standpoint or from general QoL motive but not something they care about), at this point it is not "just" a funny threat. It is Kal'tsit bringing out big guns. (Plus Doctor can point out that she provides a bad example with her downright self-destructive working habits and Amiya is no immortal Probably A Cat or something along these lines. It will not soften the blow but at least provides an opportunity to drag Kal'tsit down with them, if only a little)
Oh no yeah I am fully on board with Kal'tsit not being infallible in the slightest, despite what some ardent fans will have you believe (and she's one of my favorite Arknights characters, I just don't like this flawless Kal'tsit others lie to themselves about), the other posts have an explicit comedic nature to them and I expect you to read and treat them as such, but if you want to be serious about the topic at hand, then I don't think they threaten each other in any serious way unless it's a big, BIG fuck up. A BIG fuck up is what happened during The Great Chief Returns: The entire plane got shot down, and it was technically Doctor's responsibility. Yes, this was treated as a comedic mishap, but it also illustrates how it works. There's also their arguments as seen in the Main Story, where, after a certain point, Doctor's dialogue options all go from choices between confusion and an apologetic nature to blunt, all-business and outright being able to shoot back at Kal'tsit, showing how Doctor in-universe has grown pretty damn tired of the barbs she's shot at them ever since they've gotten back, without even knowing why she's behaving this way, doubly so because Kal'tsit IS a very kind, helpful and loving person to practically everyone else.
Kal'tsit obviously holds resentment for the events we still don't have full clarity on, and she's entitled this anger, but she also understands that, yeah, this amnesiac currently in front of her practically didn't do those things she resents. These two are realities she lives with every day of her life now and it frustrates her. Realistically speaking, unless it's absolutely necessary or unavoidable (like a plane getting shot down), the two of them probably steer clear of each other in terms of reproaching each other unless absolutely necessary. It's a complicated relationship, after all.
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differenteagletragedy · 4 months
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i was reading through your blog and omg musicals!!!! a theater kid, myself, i'd love if you'd write some headcanons about a broadway/musical star mc, if its not too close to your famous mc headcanons! also, i'd love to hear if you think the ol1 boys can sing and who would help mc practice (both lines and singing)! also who would sing along with mc while they're doing chores/housework/etc or if they'd just listen/hum/etc! you can just assume theyre poly with mc for this, if it makes it easier! :)
Listen. Listen. I love this so much. I am also a theatre kid (so much that I am forced to spell it with the "re" at the end) and I have many thoughts.
Also, Bobby from Company is Baxter after he reconnects with MC and friends, with an MC that ends up with Cove or Derek and this is just a fact. Evidence:
youtube
This is a video of single Baxter with his ten friends in five couples: Cove and MC, Derek and Tamarack, Terry and Miranda, Jude and Scott, and Qiu and OLNF MC.
ANYWAY.
-- Cove is such a fanboy. He's there to see your shows literally every time he can make it and will be disappointed if he can't come. He knows all the words to all the songs and a lot of the dialogue too. He is so proud.
-- Did you get to make a recording of your show? Try to get Cove to play something else in the car, I dare you.
-- Derek is also a big big fan, he is telling anyone who will listen about how he's your friend/boyfriend/husband. Jorge might have to tell him to chill a little bit but he's just so EXCITED.
-- He will make a point to pick you up after your evening shows. The crew knows him, so he just comes backstage after and will walk with you out the stage door. It's late and people are unpredictable, and he wants to keep you safe.
-- Baxter, surprise, also a big fan! If you started Broadway after the breakup in Step 3 then he may not figure it out, Broadway stars aren't as mainstream as movie or pop stars, for example. But he'll obviously find out when you're brought back together in Step 4 and he'll have some much research to do on you during those lost years!
-- He'll be streaming your recordings and just feeling so many things.
-- But maybe in Step 3 you've decided to pursue your theatrical dreams! A last summer at home before you move to New York, perhaps. Let Baxter take your headshots for you! He will be so good at it. He will also style you.
-- If this is the case, that you move after Step 3, I don't think Cove will move too. He could! But I can't picture him leaving the California coast. Long distance love. He and Cliff come in to see your big shows.
-- Cliff cries. Cove does too, he got it from his dad.
-- Maybe Derek will blow off a big game because it's his only chance to come see you. He feels bad about it, but he's not going to miss your big moment.
-- I haven't thought about this too much shut up
-- Boys at the Tonys! Baxter is going to KILL IT. I've talked about this with the general famous MC stuff lol, the awards show stuff, but he's going to dress to impress. So will Derek, this is very important and the boy who wore a polka dot bowtie at 13 isn't going to pull out any stops.
-- You're going to have to tell Cove to button all his buttons though, it's not the time for your cleavage baby
-- I think Baxter is the only one who could carry a tune, but he wouldn't try to get technically good. Cove is bearable with his singing. Derek really is not, but he has so much fun with it that no one would ever tell him to stop.
-- They'll all help you with your lines. Derek might actually learn lines instead of reading them from a script so he can help you practice while he's driving or something. And yeah, that's a lot, but that's just who he is.
-- If you're just having fun singing, in the car or doing chores or whatever, then they'll all sing with you. But if they catch you really going for it in the shower or something, they will all just stop and listen because oh my GOD
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wingsonghalo · 3 months
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by @cnnmonbimee! Thank you for the tag!! Read her awesome answers here!
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 66! More than I thought were on there tbh!
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? Uhhh apparently it's 684,757! Less than I thought!
3. What fandoms do you write for? In order of most fics to least: Ace Attorney, JSHK, My Hero Academia, Mob Psycho 100, Homestuck, Hunter x Hunter, Phineas and Ferb, and Supernatural. I've also written a lot of Pokemon stuff, but somehow that has escaped Ao3 despite it being my longest fandom LOL. Working on a Pokemon SV one currently though 👀
4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Project: Matchmakers (shocker, I know), Sleep (Too) Tight (It's always been slowly but steadily popular), Force of Habit (bit of a surprise there honestly), Project: Matrimony (less surprising), and The Stuff of Dreams. So what I am seeing here is that no one leaves kudos on my JSHK or MP100 or MHA fics :') Some of these fics are one-shots, so it's kind of surprising! I wish PlayWright had gotten more attention; that fic killed me while I was writing it. I'm not giving number of kudos because I'm not comfortable with that and it makes me feel bad about myself haha,,,
5. Do you respond to comments? I try to! I've fallen behind on responding to them in the past 2 years or so because life has been so busy, though…
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably A Practice, For Now?? LMAO it's also my first JSHK and the one with the most kudos HMM COULD THIS FANDOM BE ADDICTED TO ANGST PERHAPS??! I don't write angst a lot!! What can I say, I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Almost all of my fics end happily, LOL. Pick any of them that actually has an ending.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Not commonly. I've gotten anon hate before about them on tumblr on rare occasions, but usually my comments on ao3 stay pretty nice.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do sometimes, but I'm so shy about it that I rarely ever post it /)//w//(\ Usually I just share it among friends, haha!
10. Do you write crossovers? Nope, and I never will!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yes. Someone tried to run Project: Matchmakers through a translator to hide the word matches and sell it as an ebook on Amazon, but they only bothered to hide it for chapter 1 so someone reported it to me and then in retaliation I started actually selling it on Amazon for the lowest price I could because the thief was trying to sell the shittier version for like 7 dollars LSFJ;AKLD. Read about the whole debacle here.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, quite a few! People have been great about asking me for permission! 💖
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, here and there! Usually it's either fics where I have written one part and someone else has written another scene, or someone had me look over something they'd written and I added so much commentary or threw additional ideas at them so much that the story ended up changing and I somehow became a co-author, LOL.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Oh my god don't make me answer that ;alskdjfl;k. If I wrote a fic for them ever, they're my favorite. I have so many favorites that I've never written fics for, too.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? THE UNDERCOVER FIIIIIC [sobs] and also Left on Read hnnngh
16. What are your writing strengths? Emotions!! I'm super good at those! I'm also really strong at dialogue and banter, and making my writing kinda witty/funny.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Describing settings ;w; I write my scenes like I draw my art: in Descriptionless Blank Voids lkas;dlkf. I also struggle with the flow of action scenes sometimes, though I think they usually turn out okay if I spend enough time on them. I also probably use too many adverbs and adjectives, but y'know what? Fuck it I like my descriptive words thank you very much
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? As long as you're checking that it means what you think it means, or possibly asking a native speaker if you're unsure about context or need a sensitivity reader, I think it's fine. It annoys me if I have to check a footnote every other line, but if you can mostly understand it without a translation in context, it can be kinda nice! At least it says you're trying more than phonetically spelling out an accent, which--remember, kids!--is always cringe! 👍
19. First fandom you wrote for? On Ao3, it was Homestuck. On the internet in general, it was Animal Crossing and Pokemon, LOL.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Don't make me cHOOSE BETWEEN MY BABIESSS 😭 I dunno man! Project: Matchmakers is my magnum opus, but the PlayWright is lowkey kind of a masterpiece, I love so many of my JSHK fics to bits and pieces, a lot of my MP100 and MHA fics are very special to me, I've been trying to write a HxH one for YEARS and have poured my heart into making it beautiful, just UGHHH every single one of my fics I have vivid memories of conceptualizing and working on and most of them are my favorite to some degree!
I tag @carochinha, @kittykatz009, @toastytoaster22, @ittybittytoostormy, and anyone else who would like to answer these questions!!
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hannahssimblr · 5 months
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Chapter Three (Part 3)
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The crowd in the bar erupts into a cheer, and I crane my neck to see Kelly standing at the karaoke machine, clutching the microphone. She waves over at us and blows us a kiss, and then the speakers start playing euro-pop synthesiser music. Claire returns from the bathroom and turns towards the stage incredulously. “Is she going to sing Barbie Girl?”
Kelly holds the mic up to her lips. “Lads,” she says over the opening dialogue of the song. “I didn’t realise this was a duet when I picked it, so eh… I’m going to attempt both parts on my own.” Everyone cheers and laughs as she launches into the chorus. 
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I’m a Barbie Girl, in the Barbie world… Life in plastic, It’s fantastic…
The whole performance is hilarious. Everyone in the pub loves it and they all laugh and clap as she switches voices between both parts, doing a squeaky ultra feminine voice for Barbie and the lowest, grumbliest baritone she can manage for Ken. I can’t believe she’s up there doing that in front of all these people, and I’m in awe of her charisma. Say what you like about Kelly, but she really shines in moments like this. 
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We are wiping tears from our eyes when she returns to the table beaming from ear to ear. She knows she was a sensation. 
“Kells, that was amazing!” Claire exclaims. “Nobody’s going to be able to follow that”
“You all have to sign up now.” Kelly says “It’s only fair.”
I’m still laughing. “I don’t think so Kelly, there’s no way I’m getting up there.”
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“You especially have to do it now that you’ve said that.” I can tell she’s joking, but only partially. “It’s not even that bad once you’re there. You can’t really see the crowd with the lights in your eyes.”
“I’ll do it with you if you’re nervous.” Liam says to me suddenly, and everybody, even Kelly,  looks surprised. “Come on up, we can choose a duet.”
“I… no, I dunno.” I start to protest and he plants a hand heavily on my shoulder and looks right into my eyes. I wince. They’re crazy blue. “I’ve done this so many times, Evie. It’s grand, I promise nobody is going to be laughing at you, we’re all just having fun. You’re going to enjoy yourself.”
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I am swept up towards the front of the room all of a sudden, and as I go I look over my shoulder desperately one last time to see Claire and Kelly giving me thumbs up and a cheerful wave goodbye. 
We sit on a couch together and start looking through the song book. I’ve placed it on my lap, and because the lights are so dim in this corner of the pub Liam has to lean in closer to me to help choose a duet. I’m distracted by the feeling of his breath on my shoulder, fully aware of the heat from his body and the part of his leg that rests against mine. 
“I don’t know what to choose.” I say, flustered. “There’s so many options.”
“Not really when you eliminate all the solo ones.” He says and starts running his finger down each page until he finds ones that say DUET. He has very nice hands, I observe. Long, slim fingers and pronounced knuckles like a pianist. He stops his finger under an Elton John song. “You’re bound to know this one.” and I do. 
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My legs are trembling behind the karaoke machine, but it turns out that Kelly was right. I can’t see anybody in the pub for the lights shining in my face, and I realise then too that most people aren’t even paying attention to us. The pub is filled with a cacophony of noise, clinking glasses and laughter, and I relax as I realise I’m going to more of a fade-into-the-background kind of act. Just the way I like it. Liam smiles at me reassuringly and then the music kicks off, pounding through my body. 
Liam starts off. “Don’t go breakin’ my heart…”
I squint at the lyrics screen and lift my microphone to my face. “I couldn’t if I tried.” Oh no, my voice sounds wobbly. I know I have no choice but to continue. 
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“Oh honey when I get restless…”
“Baby you’re not that kind.”
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When we finish our song Liam is practically skipping behind me. “Evie!” He exclaims “You were brilliant!”
I laugh. “I wasn’t really, but I admit it was fun.”
“No no, you were, I swear to God I wouldn’t lie.”
“That’s very nice of you to say.” I smile and shake my head incredulously, but he goes on. “You can sing, you can draw, what else can you do?”
“Hah… Thanks. I think you were great!” I pause, taking everything in for a moment. “I can’t believe I did that.”
“I know, I didn’t think you would either.”
Prev // Next
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My completely unprofessional review of Mary and George
On the whole I had a lot of fun watching this series. While I disliked some things about it, it certainly was always interesting and never boring. I found it both infuriating, but also deeply emotionally affecting.
I think we have to face the fact that this is not a retelling of history, but a TV series inspired by a (fictional) book - as it says in the title sequence.
I will only very superficially touch on historical accuracy here.
I am not well read enough on the history (1 and ½ books on James I) to truly pick this story apart with regards to historical accuracy (I'm sure historians will do that and despair in the process :D)
I tried to go into Mary and George with the aim of being swept up in a piece of fiction and will be trying to review it as such.
English is not my first language so please excuse possible mistakes in grammar and awkward sentence structures. I'd like to think this review is, while messy, always coherent.
What I disliked or feel conflicted about:
1) The dialogue (my biggest Issue):
Some of Julianne Moore's lines, in the first two episodes in particular, sounded incredibly clunky and obviously expository. She's constantly explaining how society works. Stressing over and over and over how she intends to make opportunies for herself.
The dialogue writing often draws attention to itself in a way that takes you out of the story. I wish they'd done it more elegantly.
It got better from episode 4 onward (I suppose I also got used to the style), but some of it is just bad writing.
Thankfully king James and prince Charles were largely spared the bad lines. It was mostly Mary, Francis Bacon, Katherine Manners...
The swearing (I'm really not a prude, 'The Thick of it' is one of my favourite TV series):
I think it's a bit overkill and sometimes less would have been more.
Expletives can wonderfully enhance drama or comedy if used right. However, if you use it all the time, it loses its impact and just becomes background noise. Maybe that's exactly what the writers wanted to achieve? I don't know.
Or is it a lazy attempt at edge to compensate for bad dialogue writing? Or was the issue that it just didn't feel believable to me out of some of the characters mouths? (For example Sir David Graham, Francis Bacon)
2) DRAMA BABY:
Sometimes this series just veers off into the ludicrous.
Two suicide attempts and two central characters (+a dog) murdered by episode two.They are trying so hard to make DRAMA happen that none of these events get a chance to sink in or register emotionally. By the time the Overbury scandal happens, it barely registers as a dramatic peak, because so much STUFF has already happened. Again, less would have been more.
Imho the suicide attempts were uneccessary and the audience would have sympathised with George without seeing them. Is it melodramatic writing to make the difference between pre-France-George and post-France-George more obvious? Or were they trying really hard to stress that mental illness runs in the Villiers family?
3) Logical flaws:
Why would a king be staying at the house of a minor knight? It felt like a plot device and I found it very unbelievable. (History experts correct me if I'm wrong)
The king's party also felt rather small and low on security for a king who's had that many attempts on his life.
Nevertheless, it did give us Thomas Compton's hilarious 'renovations'-excuse and Sean Gilder the chance to deliver some very funny lines the way only he could.
The Hunt: Without dogs. Makes no sense. (It must have been a logistical issue when filming) Do they circle the prey and then jump on it with a knife??
With a little suspension of disbelief the story still told itself though. And George throwing himself off his horse and then deliberately (?) running into a tree was insane enough that I didn't care.
George having become a brilliant cellist in France eventhough we never see him practice the instrument. When it's necessary for the plot, he suddenly comes out with that skill. Actors being suggested to be playing instruments on screen, while they clearly aren't, is kind of a pet peeve of mine.
4) Editing
I have to say when I was watching the first two episodes I wanted to shout at the screen: Why is it edited like a bloody music video? Why the endless slomo shots?
After I'd seen the rest of the show however, I did change my mind on that. Firstly, because the other episodes were not shot in the same way, secondly, because in hindsight it made sense as a tool to tighten up and speed along a lot of the exposition, while still taking time on central scenes like the banquet disaster.
5) Clichés
The debauched and fickle king.The wasteful ruler, who's moods and allegiances change by the hour, is such a tired old cliché. However, I think they did enough to subvert the trope and make the character more nuanced. On the whole I think the character was well written for this show. And to me it felt almost like they put more effort into writing the characters of James and Charles as they did into the other characters, as well as made sure that their lines rang true. (Or maybe Tony Curran and Samuel Blenkin are just that good...)
Some very heavy handed metaphors about hunting and George being allowed to do the final kill. (foreshadowing and all that)
George Villiers, the ingenue that gets corrupted in his ascent at court.
6) The Harem:
You could ask: was it really necessary to suggest that King James had a harem of pretty guys (which is nonsese historically)?
Or necessary to suggest that that's what 'gentleman of the bedchamber' really meant?
Or am I just gonna be honest and say I'm happy a hot old man got his kit off on screen? (Being a certified old man fucker since my early 20s)
Can I both criticise it and be here for it?
Straight relationships and especially women have been sexualised gratuitously in period and fantasy drama for literal decades, so....
That being said: I don't think within the context of the series any of the sex scenes were even gratuitous. Each of them told us more about a character or moved the story along.
I still would have loved it if they'd managed to fit in a bit more of James I's intellectual side. He was well educated and well read aswell as a published author. He did take an interest in politics and influenced law-making. I'm trying to be charitable and say that most of this side of the king happened pre-canon.
7) Mary and George, the characters:
I suppose they deliberately set this in a universe that was somewhat less homophobic (literally everybody and their dog knows about the king's homosexuality) and less misogynistic than history?
I get that they deliberately put a modern spin on this story and in a lot of ways they made it work (a lot better than 2018 film Mary Queen of Scots, for example), but there were a couple of things that grated on me.
When adapting historical figures for TV/film I guess you have to adjust certain things. Make changes, so the audience is able to at least on some level relate to the characters and to keep the audience engaged.. Otherwise what's the point in writing fiction. However I could not help thinking the following:
When historical women are written like Mary - as in leaning really heavily into her being a ruthless opportunistic girlboss in a society that allows her no agency by birth - the negative side effect is that it always involuntarily implies that women of the time (or other women within the universe of the period drama) were somehow cowardly for conforming to society, or not imaginative enough to think outside the box and achieve more than their lot.
The thing is: the historical Mary Villiers clearly did make it into the King's closest cirles and gained his personal confidence! She didn't need to be a cutthroat #girlboss to achieve it, but did so in partnership with a very ambitious and intelligent young son.
In the show they kept stressing George's inability to stand on his own two feet.
I wish George's 'descent into ruthless ambition' (independent of his mother) had started earlier in the story and been a bit more gradual.
While handsome and well educated, before the time-lapse, he still feels insecure and in over his head when not guided by his mum. They show him at an execution, struggleing not to throw up. I found that to be hard to believe, considering how common public executions were at the time. It felt clearly put in there as a 'look he's sensitive deep down inside'-moment for the audience. (It's a surprising angle even in comparison to every other English 16th/17th century period drama I have ever seen – brutal executions are usually shown almost casually)
When we see him after the time-lapse long haired and fully corrupted, it feels a little abrupt.
I wish they hadn't made Sir John Villiers into quite such a cliché villain. They tried so hard to make him the big bad abuser that it stretched believability. (Or maybe it wasn't their take on the character itself but just bad writing again)
At the same time I think there are a lot of wonderful female characters in this show (Lady Hatton, Sandy, Frances Carr). It's not like this version of Mary doesn't kind of work for this modernised universe, it just occasionally stretches believability.
Mary is supposed to be woman hardened by life and abuse. I wish we had gotten a bit more nuance in her character at times. I liked the invention of Sandy and loved the scenes between them where Mary was allowed to be vulnerable.
What I Liked:
1) Entertainment value:
Every single minute of it was entertaining. Even if I was angry at the writing, I was certainly never bored.
2) The humour:
Some of the dialogue is just laugh out loud funny. Not least because it is delivered perfectly by great actors.
Examples: Thomas Compton's description of the king (delivered by Sean Gilder like only he can – he is tired™️).
Some of Mary's lines to George. Lady Hatton and Mary Villiers sniping at each other. Lady Hatton bullying her husband. Lady Hatton about Elizabeth I ('magic hymen saviour...')...
The guy who's clearly made a life out of picking up desperate men who failed to make it to court, trying to pick up George at the road-side ...(„I can pay...a bit...“)
Francis Bacon complimenting Buckingham on his style at the privy council (basically whispering to him the 17th cenetury equivalent of: „Dahling, you look fabulous. I don't know how you do it!“). Later to be seen picking up a prostitute that looks like George.
Sometimes the edginess and dark humour really works...when they stike the balance between funny and sad:
The Villiers family being a chaotic, feral mess.
The king biting and cheek licking scenes. It came so out of nowhere and was such a wonderful, yet dark quirk. It really made me laugh.
King james being a cringey but loveable drunk mess (these scenes are a thing of beauty to me.)
3) The deep, deep sadness that the whole show is drenched in:
Episodes 4-6 had me crying, rocking back and forth.
John Villier's story. Poor Maid Jenny.
Queen Anne and Charles in the backs of shots just looking absolutely done with everyone's (mainly the king's) shit.
Laurie Davidson was so, so good in that scene at George's sickbed – a desperate man that has run out of options. The way Carr's huge eyes filled with tears, the little shit. Btw: I refuse to believe that his 'love confession' and the sex (this is a guy who's spent his life using sex to get what he wants) was anything but one last desperate attempts to save himself.
Robert Carr selling out his own wife and partner in crime.
I love that they managed to feature some of King James I's depressing backstory without it feeling shoe-horned in or like a history-lesson.
Didn't shy away from his alcoholism.
The sad intimacy of the scene at the end of Episode 4 with George hugging the king, who's holding the embalmed heart.
Compared to the sinister vibe of the scene on the floor in episode 5. George gently holding the king, stroking his hair, while advising him on the benefits of war with Spain.
That scene in the corridor between Charles and George after the king has just had an angry fit.
Sandy becoming the victim of political backstabbing.
James and Charles, while the queen's dead body is rotting away in the palace.
Charles and George carrying the coffin of the queen to the king. TV MOMENT OF THE YEAR! I'm calling it now.
4) The score and editing:
I can not stress enough how beautifully the music works in conjunction with the editing. The way it underlines the story and moves it forward. There is a coldness and melancholy to the theme music that foreshadows what's to come. (I'm gonna download it and cry again right away)
There's a nice rhythm and momentum to this series – I think it plays a big part in why it is gripping.
5) Costumes/Hair/Make-up
Mary's, king James's and Francis Bacon's wardrobe being a particular highlight to me. Julianne Moore in those blue- and green-toned gowns and intricate collars is just a visual you can't forget. The countless gorgeous different-textured fabrics! The countless delicate collars and ruffs.
Giving the king bright ginger hair. It's a beautiful highlight of colour that draws attention in every shot.
6) The locations:
I love, love, love how much nature is in this. But then, there's also the Jacobean mansions, the darker vibe of the Villiers' tudor house and the castles. This is where the budget of this series really shows itself. The black and white checker-board floors of these Jacobean mansions are such a strong visual.
7) The cast:
Easily the series' biggest strength - there isn't a single weak link. It is packed to the last role with the best of British character actors (Sean Gilder, Angus Wright, Joseph Mawle...)
Particular highlights to me: Nicola Walker, Niamh Algar, Laurie Davidson (aside from the weak scottish accent) and Pearl Chanda (wish she'd gotten more to do). Trine Dyrholm, without having many lines, was 100% regal and believable as the queen .
Samuel Blenkin as Prince Charles:
He is just so perfect in this role. The stutter, the constant look of repressed despair on his face. His terrified, indignant anger and resigned sadness.
I hope this young actor's career really takes off after this. I kept thinking he would be a great Hamlet!! Or even better: a spin-off series about King Charles I with him in the lead role.
Nick Galitzine was sensitive and effective as the sympathetic POV character who turns anithero. Any problems I had with George were problems with the writing, not his performance.
I loved Julianne Moore's energy – she is radiant as Mary and just commands your attention. Unfortunately she had the thankless job of delivering most of the exposition. Her dialogue writing was (imho) often so clunky and bad, that it's hard even for a great actress to make that work. I feel sorry for her because of that.
Tony Curran embodies both the entitled, arrogant side of the character, the bawdy and disastrous side (drunk shenanigans my beloved), his sensitive and innoccent side (the first scene at court right after the Carr's conviction where he tearfully apologises to George was so beautiful), his playful and innocent side (the scene where George sits behind him on the horse and he tries to flirt by saying: „you are proof gallantry isn't dead yet at my court.“ And then smiles to himself), his angry outbursts, the scary edge, the physical and mental wreck of a man, the sweet side that is obviously desperate for love, and at times he just manages to look like a man who's carrying a lifetime of pain around on the inside.
I'm actually wondering how he managed to make me uncomfortable/made me laugh and made me want to just wrap him in a blanket and tell him it's going to be alright - all at the same time.
Give him a BAFTA already.
8) The Ending: (both negative and positive)
At first I was very angry at it because there is no proof that this happened. It is unlikeley that Mary or George murdered the king. It also makes me hope even more intensely that none of the cast and crew suggested in the media that this series was in any way historically accurate. (I largely steer clear of interviews and Q&As in general, because they destroy the illusion of the story for me)
However, if you accept the show as a piece of RPF, the sheer Shakespearean drama of the ending is great. It completely bowled me over.
If you think about everything that has happened in the show up to that point:
multiple suicide attempts and murders by episode 3, followed by more executions and hangings. The ending how it probably happened in real life would not have suited this show and would have felt anticlimactic.
I would really like to hear what you guys thought and discuss :)
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high-dragon-bait · 2 years
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How Fenris and Anders’ dichotomy is demonstrated through their romances
Hello lads, I’m obsessed with some dudes that glow
Fenris and Anders are two of my favorite characters in the Dragon Age series, and it helps that the two of them are deliberately written as foils to each other. The most blatant is the mage debate, with both of them having lived through the worst of opposite systems, but it’s there in all aspects of their character.
Fenris begins as closed off and shut in, and ends more open, with friends who care about him, and never missing a game night at the Hanged Man.
Anders begins funny and charming, if still passionate about mages, and ends entirely withdrawn, not speaking to his friends, nothing.
And of course they’re as defined by their similarities: they were both chained and oppressed by horrible systems for most of their lives, they witnessed atrocities as the result of that system, and had to escape while always living under the fear of being hunted and recaptured. 
AND ALL OF THESE TRAITS are also seen in their romances, something I’ve surprisingly never seen discussed before because it’s genuinely fascinating.
Quick disclaimer, please remember this is my interpretation of these characters and these romances, and it’s okay if they don’t match yours. Given how I just wrote an ENTIRE THING on how I believe the Anders romance is unhealthy, it’s going to become very clear which one of these romances I think is “healthier” BUT both make for very interesting stories.
Okay? Okay, let’s go
Let’s begin with their approach to a romance with Hawke
Anders and Fenris are both the only characters that initiate flirting with Hawke. In that, they are both the only characters that flirt with you, and your only response is to flirt back or tell them to stop (only symbols on the dialogue wheel are hearts or broken hearts) without you initiating first. No, this doesn’t happen with Isabela, it’s literally JUST them. In both cases it happens just after you recruit them, towards the end of the conversation, and THIS is where dichotomy begins, literally instantly
Fenris is actually pretty casual about it? He flirts with you, and you respond or you don’t, it’s not treated as a big deal either way. If you do respond though, he invites you back. Telling you he’ll “practice his flattery” for your next visit with a smile. It’s a little thing, but let’s look at what Anders does.
Anders flirts with you, and if you reciprocate, he IMMEDIATELY pulls back. Tells you that actually, no, being in a relationship with him is a bad idea and he’ll only break your heart. But he will continue to flirt with you, and will continue to have the same response if you flirt back
This continues throughout act 2. If you flirt with Fenris during his “speak to Fenris” quest he’ll ask if him being an escaped slave as well as an elf, living in an abandoned mansion bothers you, if you say no it does not that’s about as close to “discouraging” you that he ever gets (outside of the end of act 2 but we’re getting to that). He repeatedly states that he’s considering a relationship with you, and is open to finding out if it would work. And eventually, he approaches you to do just that
We’ll pause there and look at Anders
Act 2 is more of the same with him, while there is some more casual flirting for the most part, he continues to beg you not to enter a relationship with him. Yes, he’ll say that he loves you and thinks of you all the time, but you shouldn’t be with him, because this will only end badly.
Fenris spends the romance set-up pulling you closer
Anders spends it pushing you away
So why am I bringing all this up? You’ve played the games, you know how this goes, why’s the set up so important?
Well, who ends up leaving at the end of act 2? Is it the guy who’s pushing you away, or the one that’s pulling you closer?
Yeah. So... why is that?
It has to do with their emotional states, what they both want out of this relationship, and how they see Hawke.
That first and last point are where Anders and Fenris, as they so often do, line up the same. I believe that by the end of their act 2 personal quests Anders and Fenris are both in the same emotional state. Both are tired, both have had earth-shattering revelations about themselves, and both of them have been driven to a very low point thanks to it.
And, they are both equally as in love with Hawke.
It’s the middle point that leads to the shift in act 2
Because that whole “same emotional” state thing? It wasn’t a GOOD emotional state to be in, for either of them, especially not for getting into a new relationship. They were both looking for an oasis from that, a way to just be happy, to distract them from all of it.
Fenris realized you couldn’t be that, it isn’t fair, he still has so much to work on and discover about himself and he can’t do this now. So, he leaves
Anders... doesn’t care
I know that sounds mean, but stay with me.
I used to think that Anders wanted Hawke to save him, while Fenris understood that Hawke never could. I don’t think that’s it anymore. Anders knew from the start that Hawke wasn’t going to save him, but that wasn’t the important part. The important part is he knew full well how this was going to end and lets HAWKE believe they can save him, because he wants to be in a relationship with Hawke.
That’s why he spends all the lead up pushing you away, that justifies it to him, he warned you and you still came so he can use you as that oasis and still hurt you in the end. If he truly was looking out for what’s best for Hawke, he wouldn’t have entered into a relationship with them at all, but he is ultimately thinking about himself first.
Fenris isn’t willing to hurt you to make himself happy, Anders is.
He might be sorry, he might hate doing it, but he’s still willing to do it. That is the fundamental difference between Fenris and Anders, because even though Fenris does hurt Hawke when he leaves, he is actually being more selfless than Anders in that scene by hurting himself leaving.
And in the end what happens? Who gets the happy ending?
I understand that the “happy ending” and “Anders lets Hawke believe they can save him” thing are kinda subjective as everyone has their own canons. Plenty of people have their Hawke and Anders have happy endings! Which is great! But it doesn’t negate my points: Anders is willing to hurt you if he gets some happiness out of it, Fenris is not.
And it does make sense for Anders. How much happiness has he gotten in his life? Of course he’d grab it if it offered itself and of course he’s thinking about himself first, that’s how he’s stayed alive! Anders doesn’t know if he’ll live to see tomorrow, maybe the templars come, maybe he dies fighting alongside Hawke, maybe they both die, so he’ll be happy today. Loving Hawke IS rebelling in a way, even if he knows it will hurt them, its his act of rebellion because it just wasn’t allowed to him before. So he does the best he can.
But... all of that remains true for Fenris.
Anders and Fenris have a lot of similarities in their experiences, and in some cases even their values, but are ultimately very different people. It’s why I don’t think they’d ever be friends, they’re just too different in their fundamentals to get along.
And speaking of them being fundamentally different people let’s talk about how they view Hawke getting into a relationship with the other over them!
Oh boy.
I think Anders and Fenris are both fully aware that the other has strong feelings for Hawke, it’s kind of impossible for them NOT to know especially considering how loud at least Anders is about it. They... deal with this in different ways. 
(Note: We’re discussing this in the context of Hawke having shown some interest in both cause it’s pretty much the only way for the below conversations to happen btw)
If you spend the night with Fenris and do not move onto Anders, Anders does not take it well
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Anders cannot FATHOM Hawke choosing Fenris over him and he wants Fenris to know that. He does not respect Fenris nor does he really respect Hawke’s decision to pursue him.
And then- there is Anders’ response Hawke moving on to him if they slept with Fenris first.
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He is rubbing Fenris’ nose in it. He’s gloating. He is FULLY aware of how much this must be hurting Fenris, and he loves it. He WILL use Hawke to hurt Fenris because that is just how much he dislikes him.
But Fenris is equally as aware Anders is in love with Hawke and how much Hawke being with him must hurt Anders, and he hates Anders just as much, so what does he do?
Nothing.
There is no equivalent dialogue like this for Fenris. At no point does Fenris question what Hawke may see in Anders, at no point does brag to him that Hawke has chosen him ultimately. Yes, perhaps this is because of the act 2 breakup, but I don’t think so.
If Hawke slept with Fenris but then moved on to Anders, Fenris brings it up once, here
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Three lines of banter, and it’s just Fenris asking Anders to take care of Hawke. No questioning of why Hawke chose him, no “you don’t deserve them”, just “be good to them”
This is not to paint Fenris as a saint! Just look at this dialogue!
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This happens after Anders has a total breakdown over losing control and nearly murdering or actually murdering a young girl he wanted to save. Here, Fenris is making light of that to hurt Anders. That’s fucked! It’s SUPER not okay!
My point isn’t that Fenris is never needlessly cruel or petty towards Anders, it’s that he never uses Hawke as a weapon.
And it’s all because of why he leaves in act 2: Because Fenris thinks about what Hawke wants and what is best for them first. If they chose Anders over him, so be it, it hurts, but they’re happy “Be good to them”
So there you go! You read the whole thing! Again, please remember I ADORE Anders and all of this is my personal interpretation that may not align with yours, and that’s fine. The Anders/Hawke/Fenris love triangle is very important to my Hawke’s story and also a huge DUMPSTER FIRE of a dynamic that my Hawke was far from an innocent caught in the crossfire in, so that has def colored this reading. Still, I think it’s interesting, and I hope you did too!
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shitouttabuck · 5 months
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20 questions for fic writers
tagged by @thewolvesof1998 thank u bud i’m procrastinating packing and this was fun
1. how many works do you have on ao3?
seven!
2. what’s your total ao3 word count?
129,484 which is a fake number to me
3. what fandoms do you write for?
nothing has made me as insane in my life as network television procedural drama 911 on abc, so
4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?
you can start a family who will always show you love
let the world have its way with you
my hearts over-pumping and your mouth is an ambulance
like a dog with a bird at your door
i like the summer rain (i like the sounds you make)
5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?
i try very hard to because they make me so happy and it’s unbelievably kind of people to take the time to leave them!!! However i sometimes leave it too long and then worry it’s weird to reply after like. a month. which as a fic reader i wouldn’t give a shit about so idk what my problem is!!!! i will reply i will just maybe take a hot sec to do it
6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
i don’t have any i’m a happily ever after or bust kinda guy in my own head if nowhere else…… angstiest is probably the sound of love astounds me if only because it ends post-feelings realisation but still pre-relationship
7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
they’re all so happy omg. i will say with great personal bias it’s my heart’s over-pumping but also i have. a sequel in the works….
8. do you get hate on fics?
no people have been very very very lovely but also sjjsjsjs i’ve not been here super long. the funniest comment i’ve gotten was on my first fic where someone was like i liked this but it is jarringly inaccurate as mcdonald’s in california doesn’t have a veggie burger option 😭 i cried laughing im so sorry to u americans. pls petition your local mcdonald’s to stock the mcplant it slaps
9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?
have written two e-rated fics….. it’s very fun but i don’t think i’m very good so i’d like to practice actually (maybe some sexy prompts after i finish the bed-sharing ones?) just the regular kind for now like i love buck and eddie desperately and am myself into a million things but i don’t know how kinky they would actually get in my own head. so just a little gross with it for now i guess
10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?
nope!
11. have you ever had a fic stolen?
nope
12. have you ever had a fic translated?
no that would be SICK. @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove is podficcing bucket list fic which is so very cool of her!
13. have you ever co-written a fic before?
no omg i don’t know how y’all do it i’m bad at group projects but also this sounds soooooo fun. if also deeply stressful
14. what’s your all time favorite ship?
if that’s synonymous with most likely to get you institutionalised, uh. gestures around us. otherwise mulder/scully and i am just now right as i’m typing this realising i’ve never ever in my life actually read x files fic what the fuck. also steve/bucky but i haven’t read fic since 2017 probably
15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
listen i have not written a word for x files au past that one snip i shared forever ago. i want to soooo bad i’ve talked about it to some of you very rabidly but. it does not want to be written and if it did it would have to be so fucking long which is very daunting to me. not saying i’ve put her in the ground yet but. we might need some necromancing
16. what are your writing strengths?
i think i’m pretty good at writing in character? mostly? sometimes i struggle with buck just because i think we’re very similar and i project a little and then have to go back and fix it lmao but for the most part i think i’m good at that! and i have a lot of fun writing dialogue
17. what are your writing weaknesses?
plot!!!!!! and pacing!!!!!!!!!!! also my inability to write non-linearly omg if i get stuck i just get Stuck i can’t jump ahead
18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
oooh i love it and would love to include more than the teeniest bits i have but i’m so conscious about it sounding natural and not stiff to people whose language it actually is (shout out and a million kisses to @eddiebabygirldiaz for fixing the spanish in i love you like a dog!!!!!)
19. first fandom you wrote for?
911 babey!
20. favorite fic you’ve written?
my heart’s over-pumping and your mouth is an ambulance !!! not just because it was the first fic i posted after joining tumblr fandom but. idk it is so so so special to me like it makes me so happy and when i think about it i’m like. hey u wrote that. good for u my dude. and also maybe i just associate it with meeting a bunch of you whjsjssjsj
tagging @callaplums @eddiebabygirldiaz @housewifebuck @rewritetheending @try-set-me-on-fire @onward--upward @anxieteandbiscuits @devirnis @athenagranted if anyone wants to do this i’m nosy soz if you already have !!!!
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agent-cupcake · 11 days
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any advice to a new fanfic writer? i love to write but i feel like it takes a ton of energy. is that just because I’m new? thanks in advance, i am equally inspired and intimidated by your work!
AH YES another episode of the blind leading the blind let's goooo
Writing does take a lot of energy like I imagine any art does. For me, it still does, I'm just a tiny bit better at managing that energy because I've been at it for five-ish years.
Taking inspiration is good, very good actually. Read, watch movies, listen to music, absorb art and let that fuel you. BUT BUT BUT the only person you can be compared to is your past self so if you're just getting started you're actually beyond comparison.
There is no reason to care about what people say about the type of stuff you want to write, they have ant opinions and you are the god of a new world.
When you open a blank document, do not have a stare down with that endless white oblivion and contemplate why you're even alive. Make it your bitch. Write out everything you can with the incoherently drunk violence of a deadbeat boyfriend whose TV just broke, really let her have it. Are they good words? Who cares! You have defeated the snowstorm purgatory that is an empty doc, now you can try and forge something out of that chaos.
Look. I don't think people recommend this and maybe it's bad practice but find a thesaurus you like and use it. I'm giving you permission. Those "said is dead" posts are a bit cringe and I think using action tags between dialogue or describing the tone of voice/expression is more effective but sometimes you really reach a point where you've used "splendid" like six times in two paragraphs and you gotta move on. Personally I like Power Thesaurus. There are also websites you can use to check for repeated words which I find helpful.
If you can, find somebody to help read your stuff with you. It's super cursed but I've also plugged stuff into AI reading websites just to try and check for errors. Listen to the robot read your smut. Let your spirit leave your body. Suffer. I am a terrible editor (lazy editor) though so take that as you will.
Write as much as you can. That's it. You could get all the advice in the world and it won't matter unless you're doing it.
Good luck!
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