“I would describe myself as a human being who couldn’t become a complete puppet, I am an unfinished puppet, whose lifeless frame still contains a beating heart at it’s core. I am neither dead, nor am I alive.”
-Sasori
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I don't think I care much about anything now.
Anthony Trollope, from Can You Forgive Her?
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229. Spark Hatred Fire - Nihilistic Warfare (Death/Doom Metal, 2022)
Art by Egbert Lievensz van der Poel: "Plundering in a Burning Village", 1662.
After the gunpowder explosion in Delft on the 12th of October 1654 (Delftse donderslag) where his daughter and more than 100 other people were killed, his art changed dramatically - from this point on most of his paintings were filled with made up catastrophes and burning buildings by night.
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I love being a nihilist. Nothing matters!!!! There is literally NO point in living. Do whatever the FUCK you want!!! Be a little goofy!!! Be a little silly!!! it does not matter at all to me. Once I stoped caring my skin got more clear.
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“In the end most of us make no difference in the world at all. We are all high on something to get through it whether it’s drugs or hope and for what? To work just so we can live in a gilded cage and watch our dying world.”
- My WIP
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The nihilistic best friend
on the girlfriend ‘s archetypes files.
The nihilistic best friend is not a good person. She is unpredictable. You never know whether she will show up overdressed or on her pajamas; if she will arrive too late or too soon; if she will say she loves you or push you away. She drinks coffe every opportunity she has, and is always on diets even though she doesn’t look like she cares about appearances. You’ve heard at least two stories about her breaking someone’se heart, but once you get to know her, you realize she is the most broken one.
The nihilistic best friend is only your best friend because she will never admit being anything more than that. And not because she does not like you, but because she always end up feeling like something is wrong, and is afraid of hurting you.
The nihilistic best friend harms herself. But she does it so subtly no one realizes. She hates life and sees no meaning in it, but she laughs when with her friends. She loves music, reading, movies and games. She is used to being called a nerd and smart. Still, she would rather be dead. She likes playing solitaire and feels loveless.
The nihilistic best friend is so familiar to me.
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He experienced, as in a mystical vision, the infinite wretchedness of the whole of creation, its cruelty and its pain, the pointlessness of life, the pointlessness of his life, his shame, his defeat, his condemnation, his death by torture.
Iris Murdoch, from The Book and the Brotherhood
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