This was literally the first thing I thought of the moment I found out that the adopt mechanic was a thing.

THE SMOOTH TASTE OF [NEO]

Why I draw Spamton the way I do and in defense of the "Tumblr sexyman" Spamton G. Spamton. An ESSAY.

EDIT 2/3/24 - Fixed some grammatical errors, changed font colors to make them easier to read against a white background, and reframed some of my arguments, especially regarding the "Yaoi style" portion, as it came across as ignorant and spiteful.

I follow the #spamton tag here, and I hate to say it, but it's full of artists jabbing at other artists who so happen to draw Spamton handsome. I see comments like, "No, he's a middle-aged sleazeball who is grungy and dirty." Often, these depictions show him with graying hair, ratty clothes, and covered in filth and grime. While there is nothing inherently wrong about drawing him this way, I find it disingenuous that the same people who draw him this way criticize people who draw him more handsome and or clean-cut because this depiction is even less based on his canon appearance than someone simply drawing him more realistically proportioned and with a pleasing visage (the definition of what this is varies by artist, but they're all often reduced to just "tumblr sexyman.") I see similar comments by people who draw him in what they may describe as "disgusting" or a "dirty scammer."

If Toby intended for Spamton to look dirty and gross, he would have simply gone with a similar design route to this character as an NPC in Undertale.

Toby or other official arts never depict him with the following, even though I see it in fan art all the time:

Ball-jointed hands. Some artists draw them properly and make them look super cool. Simple lines aren't how they look in reality, but I get why people do that. Either way, it's not canon.

Dirty with tattered clothes. Spamton is only ever shown with a black blazer. It's debatable if he wears pants, but Toby has also drawn him with a collared shirt and tie.

Graying hair. Should be obvious. He's only ever seen with jet-black hair.

Overweight/Fat. While some fan depictions of this are cute, it's not canon. Spamton is always drawn thin but not necessarily in shape.

Buff. Same as the above. It looks really good in some fanart but is also not canon.

Tail. It can look really, really cute, but not canon for him or any of the Addisons.

Feathers. Only Swatch and the Swatchlings are depicted with feathers in Cyber World.

"40+ years old" - There is zero evidence of this in-game or in official merchandise or media. This assumption apparently comes from people assuming that his birthday would be the same as the first "spam email," which (at the time of this writing) was 46 years ago. This is a false equivalency since there is no indication that Spamton has any associations with our real-world history of spam emails. It should also be noted that this was not a true spam email. The only thing closest to Spamton in association with real spam email history may be his favorite year, 1997, in which spam marketing emails became frequent nuisances. However, actions to stop spam mail started in 1996, and it was by the 2000s that they became a serious concern because technology had since advanced. If he were truly born in 1978, he would only be 19 by 1997. While not impossible, it's not how most people see him in his Big Shot years of barely just entering adulthood. Also, as someone who has lived through most of the 90s, I can attest to a lot of this. Spam stuff existed, but news reports only heavily got into it by the 2000s.

100% Inorganic or Robot. While a cool idea, there is more evidence against this, like his ability to eat, sleep, and genuinely feel pain.

Boobs. I get most people who do this are doing it for fun, but it's not canon to his design, lol.

Tall. The most obvious one. Spamton is below average height, as made evident by his nearly 1:1 scale with Kris, a teenager.

Toddler-sized. Same as above. I won't lie that it can be drawn super cute, though. Haha!

With all that being said, why is it such a contention among his fans to depict him as handsome?

There is evidence to support that Spamton is at least, to some degree, good-looking but unconventionally attractive based on several sources. It should be noted that people often use his shop sprite as the best representation of his head, but this isn't accurate, either. In Undertale and Deltarune, because of its cartoonish sprites, it shouldn't surprise anyone that Spamton's are the most inaccurate and change frequently. Another user posted an entire comparison of all his sprites and how drastically inconsistent they are. I tried searching through my likes for this, but I can't find it. If anyone finds this, please link or reblog it to this post. Anyway, the intent of the post was to show artists that there are numerous different ways you can interpret Spamton's design with what's provided in the game, alone.

Stuff people often miss that is canon:

Lips. Believe it or not, this bastard's got kissable lips. Toby's recent art and his Neo attack are proof of this.

Eyes under the glasses. Seen in his sprite of going "BIG SHOT" the first time with Kris. It also hints at heterochromia because they contrast in color with yellow pupils under the pink and pink under the yellow.

NEO has no visible jaw hinge line. Only puppet Spamton does. Big Shot Spamton doesn't have one, either.

NEO's glasses' colors are reversed, and they are pince-nez style.

Androgynous sense of fashion. This is the least missed one, but it's worth mentioning. Spamton has no issues wearing pink, a color nowadays associated with women, and the NEO body has fabulous heels in addition to mostly being a magenta pink. The dress on the mannequin that greatly resembles him (and may hint at him being a white Addison before) shows a pretty dress that mirrors the one Mettaton wore in Undertale.

So then, WHY is he being depicted as handsome or unconventionally good-looking a BAD thing?

There really shouldn't be an issue with it at all. It's less offensive and technically more canon than many of the supposed depictions of him being a sleazebag who looks like he hasn't showered in a century and is hooked up on drugs or booze. You don't become a media darling without a charming personality. Mettaton only got successful in Undertale before he got his EX body because there was literally nothing else the people could watch. Spamton, on the other hand, was competing against many, so he had to stand out and look good even with the help of Mike (and possibly Tenna).

I often see people make this very reductive argument that it's a "yaoi style." This is by far one of the stupidest arguments I've ever seen. Drawing good-looking men is NOT equivalent to liking Yaoi. There are plenty of other genres of Asian-origin or Anime-styled media that feature pretty boys that have nothing to do with Boy's Love. Even Shounen anime has some bishies. Drawing bishounen-style male characters is a design choice and does not indicate someone's interest in Yaoi media. I swear, I have never seen this problem with Eastern fans. It's rude to lump people with similar art styles under something most people who make this claim don't even understand. I've seen people make upset comments about other people calling their style stuff like "Cal-Arts" even if they never went to Cal-Arts or like the media produced by them. It's the same principle. Stop lumping entire artists under one umbrella.

I draw him handsome because it's simply the way I see him. I love many other depictions of him, undoubtedly, and I even have a sticker set that depicts him with the graying hair, but it looks really good anyway. My point is, the fact that people who draw him dark and handsome shouldn't be scrutinized any more than people who draw him way more off base.

My personal contentions with the assumption he is a "dirty sleazebag old man."

I find this absolutely hilarious because this is a genuine stereotype and stock character of people similar to him. The douchebag salesman is a trope that's been around for a long time, but people don't seem to realize that this is a caricature and not representative of real salespeople.

Go to any @$%^ing department store or even an electronics one. Do you ever see anyone selling you stuff looking like they crawled out of the trash? Most are lower-class people who can't find any other job, meaning they are stuck with sales. It takes skill to be a good salesman, and I hate to brag, but I can probably sell you a #@$%ing soap bar and convince you that the extra $10 you're spending on it over a drugstore brand is better for your hands by deeply moisturizing them through herbal extracts and only "naturally" derived cleansing agents. Your hands are dry from the cold, drawing moisture out of them, so the investment would be worth it for the health of your skin during this harsh winter season. Why risk a drugstore brand that will only make your hands feel even rougher, flakier, and cracked? Stuff like this requires you to look someone in the eyes and observe who they are—their body language, way of carrying themselves, and the cadence of how they respond to your words. Does it always work? No. However, do you think anyone would $%^&ing buy ANY LEGAL PRODUCT if a salesperson looked like they were a shady crack dealer who was suspicious as %^&( to deal with? NO. It's a stereotype caricature for a REASON. It's meant to demean the reality of the salesperson who is forced to peddle a stupid product for a living. It's hard, and if anything, GET MAD at the people who are the ones making the crappy product! Yeah, some salesmen are bad at their jobs, but do you really believe that Cyber City's #1 RATED SALESMAN got there from being mediocre?! He may have gotten outside help for something that Toby never made clear, but he definitely does NOT lack the personality to make a great salesman. And believe it or not, there is plenty of evidence to prove he WASN'T bad at it! The other NPCs sell stuff that was once his goods but with his labels removed, and based on his statement of wanting to "make his own deals," this heavily implies he was NOT selling products he wanted to sell before he became a Big Shot. He has a strong sense of pride in the way he sees and presents himself, and I think this may be overlooked by people who make him look as ratty as possible.

I will also CLEARLY state this but this depiction overall does several of the following, which I KNOW many people will say is bad:

Ageism. Why do so many people, mostly Zoomers, assume that a man in his 40s is washed-up, gross, or even considered old? I've seen hotter men in their 40s than some young men in their early 20s.

Downplays his mental health struggles. One of the best things about Spamton is how he DOESN'T play into just the "sleazebag" stereotype. Once we go into his shop, we see that he is truly just a very broken man. His theme song is a FARCE to try and convince you that he's tougher than he really is.

Classist/Poor-Shaming. The assumption that a homeless person has to have no sense of cleanliness. Please, for the love of all that is good, meet actual homeless people. Not all of them are like this. Spamton clearly keeps himself rather clean for someone who dumpster dives. He is trying to stay true to himself, and his sense of self is one of pride. There is no dialogue or description to imply he smells or lacks proper hygiene.

Again, while there is nothing inherently wrong with drawing him this way, I just want people to be more aware of why they draw him this way. Think of it like a thought experiment to reflect on why you see him the way you do. How I draw Spamton comes from a place of deep empathy, love, and life experiences I've had in sales in addition to ALWAYS being customer-facing, meaning I know what works and what doesn't for over a DECADE. It's rather bizarre to me that people who claim to be big fans of him draw him in such a demeaning way that goes beyond the canon depiction and lowers him to absolute dirt, almost like beating this character with the ugly stick just because it's "funny." Is he a tragic character to you? Or is he simply a clown to laugh at for his failures and hardships? How we depict and see people is utterly fascinating because it reflects in real life, too.

You can take the exact same person and show them to different groups of people, and they will all see the same person differently. They don't have to be artists, but they tend to vary if you ask their opinions. For example, I think the actor Mads Mikkelsen is very attractive, but I know many who wouldn't understand why. A guy I've had a crush on for years is one of the hottest men ever to me, but a friend of mine called him "just a guy."

I fully understand that some people find the way I draw him stupid. It is what it is. I can't force you to like it.

I'm simply trying to point out my reasonings for why I draw him this way, and I would like others to think about their methods, too, and NOT to bash other people outright or go "ewww Yaoi tumblr sexyman" just because someone doesn't depict him with stereotypical traits or as "100% canon style" (which is mostly just copying the game's sprite style.)

Available on muse-europe.com

wait cause jon bernthal.

mikey, ethan from those who wish me dead, frank castle, oh my gOD frank castle.

blood + hot men

Portrait of Sarah Harrop (Mrs. Bates) as a Muse, 1780-1781 Angelica Kauffmann

Yasuke would be SO upset with his research being used as a foundation for Neo World, though.

Yasuke's entire purpose in going into neurology was to help people regain memories, to fight what is implied to be early onset Alzheimer's (from which his mother is implied to have died). His entire thing is about helping people to remember and maintain the memories their mind wants them to lose.

(In this case, the implication that this was used to help the survivors regain their missing memories is on point.)

But the idea that his research would be used to literally strip people of their memories to make them live new lives and then rewrite over those memories is such an affront to his research. It is the exact opposite of what his research was for.

And he would hate both it and everyone who used it for that purpose.

“…”

Wobble.

Narrator voice: She has forgotten why she was mad in the first place.

This is a piece I commissioned for. Do not steal, do not edit, do not use, and do not repost. I was given permission to post this onto my blog. Okay to reblog.

Haru Miura and Gokudera© Akira Amano

Artist is Fluffypepole from dA

How is N Brio?

“So when MATT says that the Calamity killed 2/3s of the population it’s good story telling, BUT WHEN I, BRENNAN LEE MULLIGAN-“

Is for me. Don't mind me.

Did you know? They had made a promise a while back. Haru promised to let him know if she was interested in someone so that he could judge them for her. At the time, Haru had been avoiding everyone else under the premise that she was busy with her studies when she was really needing some space to organize her thoughts before she moved on from Tsuna. Lambo being Lambo, he’d gone to visit her despite the others telling him to be patient.

Lambo-san + Patience = impossible.

In Lambo-san’s defense, he was lonely! He liked playing with Haru! Can’t she just study with everyone else? You know, Haru likes to cry in secret a lot. Lambo has seen it before, so he could tell she’d been crying when he went to visit her. Lambo-san doesn’t like to see Haru cry, so they made a promise that she’d tell him if she liked someone… BUT she lied!

Just yesterday, he heard Haru talking to her friends, and they asked her about a person she liked. Well, clearly Haru forgot their promise, so he’s going to remind her! “Oi! Haru! You broke a promise!” Lambo runs up to her and takes hold of her hand, an old habit hard to break. “You promised to tell Lambo-san if you like someone. You can’t tell your friends and not Lambo-san.”  

N/TWEWY: Joshua’s Mother & Father

In NEO, Joshua’s introduction follows a similar structure to how it does in TWEWY in English, so I was curious if it was the same in Japanese.  

They turned out to be similar, the only difference is how Joshua refers to his parents. And in the animation, Joshua doesn't get time to bring up his parents.

English

TWEWY

The name’s Yoshiya Kiryu. But Mother and Father call me Joshua. I guess you can call me Joshua, too - Seeing as how you’re my dear, dear partner.

NEO

Heh. The name’s Yoshiya Kiryu. But Mother and Father call me “Joshua”. I suppose you can call me “Joshua,” too.

Joshua's introduction is pretty much the same. If it's not just how Joshua likes to introduce himself, then it seems like a callback to how he introduced himself in TWEWY.

Japanese

TWEWY

僕は 桐生 義弥（キリュウ ヨシャ） I'm Kiryu Yoshiya パパとママは僕のことをヨシュアと呼ぶんだ Papa and Mama call me Joshua 君もヨシュアって呼んでいいよ You can call me Joshua too 大事な僕のパートナーだからね since you're my important partner

Already compared to the English version, Joshua refers to his parents in an interesting way, and in a different order. The use of パパとママ, “Papa and Mama”, sounds about how you would expect in English. It's one way for children to refer to their parents, like saying "daddy and mummy".

Similar in English, it's not likely to hear daddy and mummy from someone who's older.

NEO

僕は I'm 桐生 義弥（キリュウ ヨシャ）  Kiryu Yoshiya ヨシュアって呼んでくれていいよ You can call me Joshua うちの両親もそう呼ぶんだ My parents call me that too

In NEO, Joshua says うちの両親, “my parents”, instead of パパとママ, “Papa and Mama”. Using 両親 (parents) is the usual way to refer to your parents.

So then, in English Joshua refers to his parents the same way by using "Mother and Father", but in Japanese it changes from an unusual way to a normal way. In their own ways, Joshua's introduction changes from being odd in some way to being more normal.

Extra Musings

For me, it's interesting that he brings up his parents when he introduces himself, and then says he's the Composer.

You may not know this, but I'm Shibuya's Composer.

僕は渋谷のコンポーザーを務めてる I'm serving as Shibuya's Composer

(Aside: "serve", like a job or a role. Previous discussion about that is over here.)

Is how Joshua introduces himself just a thing he does? Is family important to him? How much impact do his parents (related or otherwise) have on him? Are they still around? Is it just a quirk left over "from before"? Whatever that means.

How important are names to him?

Maybe it's a neat callback to his OG introduction. But it caught my curiosity.

Master Post of EN/JP Comparisons

*smug Neo noises* "can't believe these suckers let me in here!" Neo smirked after sneaking her way into one of the most exclusive and sophisticated clubs in all of remnant.

"BWOOMPH! BLFFFOOOOOOOOOOORT!!"

"BRUUUUUP! Duuh... What was I doin' again?" Neo asked head spinning after her drink with her body having fattened into the form of a much older slobbier woman.

"Oh bo-BWURRRP-other! Looks like I split my dress again~"