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#my doctor went ‘I don’t fucking know what you have but you have something I’ve seen it with my own eyes’
oceandriveab · 2 days
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how do you think rafe would react if jack got mia pregnant???? cause i feel like he’d flip out and be angry at her, then feel like he failed as a parent if his daughter got pregnant even tho she’s 18
he would freeeeeaaaakkkkkkk the fuck owt😭
i think u sent another ask w the same concept and i’ve been teetering on it bc i’m not sure if i wanna add ANOTHER baby to the mix LMAO but i still wanna talk ab it because i think it’d definitely be interesting !!!!!!!!!! cw: teen pregnancy, rafe is pissed (like actually pissed off this time. like he is shouting) that’s ab it!
we will not see any more of mia’s baby past this BTW, i just wanted to write an this!
she’d tell rhett before she told mom and rafe because that’s her little brother and despite them being kind of close in age (if she’s 18 here then he’s 16), they’re actually super close <3 so she’d tell him when they were home alone one day and he’d be like 😦WHAT????!????? and she’d just be like “I KNOW!!!!! what the FUCK am i gonna do??!?” and then they’re both freaking out and pacing around the house bc what the fuck are they gonna do?!?!!??!!!!!! and how is rhett gonna keep this big secret when he runs his mouth 25/8?!?!!!!! (😭😭😭)
that night or a day or so later, she’d finally tell mom and rafe. she’d sit them down in the living room and they’d immediately be on alert because they could tell something was wrong.
she was wringing her hands and fidgeting with her rings and not holding eye contact- which is so unlike her!!!
“what’s goin’ on, sweetheart?” rafe asks, all concerned.
“i, um, oh my god.” when mia starts hyperventilating and crying, mom and rafe immediately pull her into a little group hug, shushing her and telling her it will be okay.
“mimi, it’s alright. just tell us what’s going on.”
“i don’t know how.” she cried out, breaking your heart at the way her voice broke.
“what do you mean?” you brush her hair away from her face and bring her chin up to look at her eyes.
“i’m pregnant. i-i took a test and-and i went to the doctor and they saw the baby and everything and i don’t know what to do. i’m sorry. i’m so so sorry.” sobs wracked mia’s body as she buried her face into your shirt.
rafe blinked very slowly, trying to process what she just said.
you saw the way his jaw clenched and it made your heart race. he’d came a long way from the way he was as a teenager, but certain situations could still provoke that temper- and this was definitely one of those situations.
“mia, baby-“
“go to your room.” rafe told her, sternly.
mia clenched onto your shirt tightly and you looked at rafe, silently pleading him to relax.
“dad, ‘m sorry! i-i didn’t-“
“what did i just say?” his booming voice made both you and mia flinch.
“just go to your room, baby girl. i’ll be up there soon.” you kissed her head comfortingly as she nodded and got up, running into her room.
“rafe-“
“don’t.” rafe was standing up now, pacing around the room with his hands pulling at his hair.
“rafe, you need to-“
“y/n, fucking stop. just-just stop! i don’t wanna hear it!”
“she’s-“
“she’s fucking pregnant! do you realize that? did you hear what the fuck she was saying while you were sitting there coddling her, huh? she is fucking pregnant. our daughter is having a baby, y/n.” rafe stared at you incredulously as he waved his hands around.
“i know, rafe! i fucking know! but, the last thing she needs is for us to freak out on her! she is fucking terrified right now and she does not need you making that shit worse!” you rose from your seat, standing across from rafe.
“you know what the last thing i need right now is? a fucking grandchild! and-and what the fuck does this say about me, huh? about us? she knows this family has a reputation to uphold and she’s out here getting fucking pregnant?! after i told her and told her and told her, i don’t know how many goddamn times, that she had no fucking business having sex but if she chose to, she needed to be extremely fucking careful! you-you’re too fuckin’ soft on her, y/n! i shoulda’ wore her ass out when we caught her with that fucking hickey that day. but no! no! you were all ‘it’s okay, rafe!! she’s just a teenager!!’ look at her now- fucking pregnant at eighteen! guess we’ve both fuckin’ failed her.” rafe’s shouting made tears roll down your cheeks.
you understood his point, but you also knew how mia was feeling- causing you to have mixed emotions about the whole situation.
“rafe, please-“
“no. i-i need to get the fuck out of here.” you tried to rush after him when you saw him grab his keys but by the time you reached him, the door was slammed in your face.
you stood at the shut door and cried silently.
what the fuck are you going to do?
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pierregaslyliked · 2 years
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wait but why did you have to get off of SSRI’s?? it sounds like you wanted to stay on them?
As my psychiatrist says, I’m medical mystery and worst case he has ever seen. (He then went on a rant how it’s not my responsibility to have common symptoms and how he’s gonna work hard to find anything that works around my extremely weird symptoms <3 love him so much). I’m extremely pill resistant and I have fuckload side effects. If the pills DO work (so far in 10 years of medication only 2 have worked ): it’s that bad), I get side effects that shot down my quality of life in different ways ): I need a dr house basically 😂 rn we decided to take me of what I was taking before bcs of headaches I was getting if I missed even one day of medication. We only really decided I need to start something else bcs one week, I called too late and I was on my last pill, he forgot to fill my prescribtion and after 3 days of no pills I was literally crawling on floor, looking for any pill, even one outside a casing, anything to stop the headache and I didn’t call an ambulance only bcs I found 2 pills in a casing under my bed ): next day I went to emergency psychiatrist and after that me and my doctor agreed it’s too dangerous to keep me on cymbalta ): so I’m going from massive withdrawal + side effects from starting new pills (new approach! Idk where it’ll take me!) and just bleghhhhh it’s not gooooooood
But it’s ok!!! Bcs I’m extremely powerful and unsinkable! Ptsd and mdd can bite my ASS bcs we WILL find something that works, something that won’t give me massive side effects and I’m already SO extremely much better then where I was 10 years ago!! It’s a war I will win!! It’s a question of when, not if!!!
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#don’t read this if you don’t want to hear about weight loss (unintentional due to health issues)#i’ve been struggling really bad to eat for the latter half of this year which is something i’ve been having issues w the last couple years#but with weed i was still able to eat decent meals and snacks in the evening and i had been slowly gaining weight until this summer#and i’ve always been a little chunky#but i’ve lost at least 30 pounds in the last ~6 months bc i am just unable to eat really at all#everything makes me nauseous or want to gag and when i cook meals i can make myself eat a couple bites so im not starving any more but#i can’t finish anything#and i can only eat in the evenings#from the time i wake up till about 8pm i maybe have a box of apple juice#and ive had a couple appts w my primary care dr and she straight up doesn’t care i asked for an appetite stimulant previously and she just#upped my migraine med instead….and then when i went back and had lost more weight she said she couldn’t even give me#an appetite stimulant and that i would need a referral for a nutritionist…….#and that she wouldn’t be concerned at all if i weren’t losing weight…#and today i was complaining to my mom about how loose my leggings were and i really don’t want to buy new clothes and she was like you know#that’s actually a good thing#you starving every day for fucking months is a good thing actually :)))))))#i’m just so sick of it…i’m sick of my coworkers complimenting me when i am starving and can’t do anything about it….sick of my doctor not#caring bc im still overweight so since i don’t look like im dying it must not be a problem#i don’t know what’s causing this and i don’t know what to do……i miss enjoying food it was one of the very few pleasures i have in life#im tired of unintentionally being an asshole at work bc im so hungry and i feel like shit but if i try to eat ill vom#cant watch food videos on youtube anymore bc they make me ill#cant read anything that mentions food or describes what people are eating anymore bc it makes me gag#im just sick of this#maybe i’ll try to find a new doctor#as if i can afford to go
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Guerrilla
serialkiller!dr.yunho x writer!reader
he is a serial killer with morals okay almost a vigilante
dni if you're not comfortable with this trope.
genres and warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive, violence warnings, atz as doctors cameos, some gory descriptions, twisted morals, past trauma, questionable stuff honestly esp yunho's intrusive thoughts, read at your own risk.
word count: ~27k
synopsis: you're a crime fiction writer and you move in with dr. jeong yunho despite his strange, strict house rules. he's very private and you don't mind that, but he's also very cold and unapproachable and you're determined to crack through his walls. little did you know your obsession with gore and crime would melt his heart. Soon, you find yourself tangled in lies, secrets and a detective from your past who suspects yunho and his gang as you navigate thru your relationship with him.
manager-nim: @eightmakesonebraincell (i had a dream. we talked about it and this happened-)
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“You know, if you could just help me bring my bags inside instead of staring at me like I’m about to commit a homicide, maybe you wouldn’t have to complain about the noise and not being able to focus on… whatever the heck you wanted to do.”
Yunho blinked. Was he hearing you right? When you cocked your head waiting for a response, he licked his suddenly dry lips. “I’m just worried about the amount of bags you’ve brought at this hour of night.”
The ungodly hours after midnight. You tucked your hair behind your ears before dragging one of the heavier bags to your room, the floorboard creaking unceremoniously. You heard the groan of your house owner who finally got up after a solid ten minutes of judging you and went to the porch to pick up a bag-
And almost fell on his knees.
“What the fuck did you put in here?” 
“What do you think?” You asked, throwing the bag in your room and going to the porch, snatching the bag and dragging it yourself. 
“A body?”
“Or two,” you muttered under your breath and again, Yunho thought he was hearing things. “It’s just my books. I thought I mentioned in the form that I’m an aspiring writer and would be coped up in my room reading or writing most hours of the day. I really won’t bother you much, just help me get my bags inside before the rain gets any worse. I don’t want my books getting ruined.”
Begrudgingly, Yunho obeyed, dragging two bags at once just to show you he wasn’t weak. You, however, did not bat an eye, much to his annoyance. After bringing in the last bags, he stood in your room looking around.
“I’m not sure this room is big enough for your books…”
“Don’t worry, I’ve lived in smaller rooms with more books,” you finally cracked a smile. “Nice to meet you, Dr. Jeong. I thought you’re usually doing night shifts?”
“I had a day off today and planned to sleep, but unfortunately, you disturbed my sleep.”
“You’re welcome,” you weren’t going to let him damper the mood. “Since you’re awake now, might as well tell me any rules about the house so I can finally go fix up a meal for myself. And an apology meal for you, though, as the owner of this house, you should be in the kitchen fixing something for your newly arrived housemate. But… I won’t complain.”
Yunho folded his arms, considering you. There was something about you that didn’t make him want to kill you in the most painful way, which was odd for him. He recalled the last time someone moved in with him and he almost dissected him alive. “Nice to meet you too, y/n. I’m trusting you read the rules before you decided to move in?”
“‘Minimal noise especially during the day, no intervening in each other’s business, an absolute no to bringing over people even if they are your family- if you have to, on a three-days notice, and… no getting to know each other. The workshop in the garage and the upper floor is off-limits.’ I believe I got them right?”
“You have an exceptional memory,” Yunho was impressed for once. “Why did you move here?”
“I’m sure you read my response in your form too, but to put it simply, I can’t afford a nicer place, though I’m curious why a doctor is living in such a dodgy little house in a shady town-”
“I, too, need to make ends meet,” Yunho explained even though he could have easily ignored your question. “Circumstances. Besides, I get a whole house instead of a cramped apartment in the city, and my workplace is close.”
“I know! Cramped apartments are suffocating. Even though I’ll only own a room here and share the floor, at least it’s a… house.”
Yunho nodded. “I’ll give you three days to settle down and break any rules except the ones mentioned in the form. Now, I understand that you can cook?”
“Always been a good cook,” you said proudly. 
“We can share the kitchen expenses and if you cook enough for the both of us, I can take 40 percent off your rent. Fair offer, isn’t it?”
“Peculiar is what it is,” you told him. “But I won’t question you. If I have to cook, might as well for the both of us. Saves me money in the long run, and I need to save every penny I can.”
“Right. There are a few cabinets locked in the kitchen, please don’t try to open them. I can’t think of any other rules right now, but try to keep it down, will you? And again, the upper floor is absolutely off-limits.”
“Got it,” you nodded. “Let me know your usual schedule so I don’t think there’s a serial killer entering my apartment in the middle of the night.”
Once again, Yunho had to stop himself from twitching in surprise. “What’s your obsession with serial killers and murders? You’ve mentioned them numerous times in the past half an hour.”
“I think the rules go both ways, Dr. Jeong Yunho,” you smiled teasingly, opening one of the bags and taking a deep breath at the amount of books in it. “But if you have to know… my genres are crime fiction and mystery. I hope I don’t scare you away, especially if I ask you something odd about human anatomy.”
Yunho almost gaped at you before shaking his head and exiting your room, absolutely unnerved by you in a mere half an hour. It was crazy- usually, he was the one making people feel alarmed or discomposed, but you were an odd one for sure. However, as with every past housemate, he was sure you were going to get on his nerves and he would have to either bury your bones in the backyard- consequently breaking the ‘code’- or plan something elaborate and chase you out. 
It wasn’t that he didn’t want you to be a pleasant person to share the house with. But when he opened the door at about 1am to a distraught looking girl that didn’t even reach his shoulders carrying six bags, some bigger than her… he wondered if he should kick you right out and remove the ad he had put in on a few websites looking for a ‘peaceful’ housemate. He was sure you must have some thoughts about him too- he wasn’t the most welcoming person and people would eventually get curious about his closed-off personality and start snooping around.
For now, Yunho peeked into your room from the stairs- you had your hands on your hips and were assessing the room, probably planning how you could fit everything in there. He checked the time- he needed to leave soon. Praying silently that you would just fall asleep or something instead of snooping around, he went to his room to get ready.
You, though, had no plans to sleep tonight. You needed to set your room and get some sleep so you could meet the deadline of your draft that was due this weekend- only three days away. You assessed the space in the room again- if you could move the bed to the corner, you could place your computer table and chair there which would be arriving in the morning. You could line the books along the rest of the walls on the floor. You didn’t need any fancy shelves. Thankfully, this room had its own closet so you wouldn’t need to worry about where to fit your clothes. 
You exited the room into the living room space, wanting to get the bearings of this house. The toilet was right in front of your room and one of the reasons you moved into this dodgy house was that it was… a good house. A toilet all to yourself was a blessing, and upon checking it looked clean. 
The living room wasn’t too big but it looked cosy. You noticed a lack of personal belongings and decided to add a few potted plants on the windows soon. There was no TV but you had a projector and if you moved the couch, you could have a whole plain wall which was perfect to watch dramas when Yunho would be away. The kitchen space was at the opposite end with a large countertop in between and it looked like Yunho had most of the kitchen appliances already. 
And at the end where the main door was, there were stairs leading up to the doctor’s space. Off-limits. You wondered why he was so uptight but you figured that as long as he was letting you live almost for free in return for home-cooked meals and maintaining the house, you could tolerate him. It was strange if you thought about it but you didn’t have the luxury to overthink right now.
You finally had a place- better than an apartment, yet something you could afford. You found yourself smiling. You just need to meet your deadlines now and hopefully publish your book by the end of the year- before the publishers change their mind. 
But first… coffee.
You went to your room to get the bottle of your favourite coffee blend, which was really a mixture from a few different brands that you had come up with after years of experimentation. You set two cups on the counter and checked the fridge for milk. You weren’t sure about the doctor’s preferences so you made a simple latte like your own. You were just finishing up when you heard the dull footsteps of him descending the stairs. 
“I made coffee…” you trailed off- now that he was in a white button down and black slacks with his hair styled, it finally settled in.
Doctor Jeong Yunho was pretty damn attractive.
“Uh…” he looked around awkwardly before grabbing the mug and taking a sip, raising his brows in surprise. “This… is actually pretty good.”
You grinned. “My own blend.”
He made an impressed face and you took that opportunity to ask. “You don’t mind if I make a few changes to this floor, right? Nothing major, just a few plants here and there, maybe get a chair or two, move the furniture around to make space for the projector?”
“Isn’t it too early for that?” Yunho frowned. “I might kick you out before that. Or you might end up leaving-”
“I’m sure we’ll be fine,” you dismissed. “What I mean is, I’m staying out of your way so you would have no reason to kick me out because I really, really cannot get a better deal than I got with you.”
“Sure, then,” he finished his coffee. “Do whatever you like as long as you stick to the rules. I’ll be on my way then.”
You relaxed, mind already buzzing with ideas as you headed towards your room to fix your draft.
—-------------------------------
The trial period Yunho had given you was over and you were now seated in the kitchen with your third cup of coffee since midnight, awaiting your judgement.
Really, you were telling yourself that you shouldn’t worry. If you had to be your own judge, you had done a spectacular job of staying out of the doctor’s way except when unavoidable- which was usually right before he left for work around midnight when you would both eat dinner, or his usual shift in the later hours of morning. He insisted that he was fine eating alone and you didn’t have to wait for him to eat your own dinner, and yes, he sounded like he could be anywhere but there, but you told him that if you were cooking for him, you’d rather he eat at least one meal with you. For what reason, you didn’t give and he didn’t ask.
You didn’t give because you may be a self-proclaimed good cook but you were also someone who was sensitive. And that meant that if Yunho didn’t like something you cooked, you would be ready to take constructive criticism and improve. 
And he didn’t ask because he could see that you were a sensitive one. He knew the moment he told you off for filling the house with potted plants within one day and you almost teared up asking if he didn’t like the signs of life around the house. He actually almost laughed at that but when he realised you were serious, he told you he wouldn’t take care of the plants. You told him you wouldn’t expect him to because the plants were ‘your babies’ and had moved two houses with you already. 
So yes, you stayed out of his way. You cooked for him. You cleaned the house quite a bit- so much that Yunho almost didn’t recognise his own porch because of how different it looked in the span of a few hours that he was absent from the house. He made a point of telling you right after that your trial period wasn’t up, and you made a point of retorting with how you were just waiting for him to give in, to which you earned a scowl. By now, you knew that the doctor was not very friendly- at least not immediately. You wondered if that was the reason why he had troubles with his past housemates. 
When you heard the sound of keys jingling and the door unlocking, you straightened and started heating up the dinner- you kept it traditional today- rice, beef and a lot of side dishes. Perhaps, it was your last attempt to win him over, and your heart was beating loudly with anticipation. You never waited for him to come home and share a meal in the early hours of morning but today, you made an exception. You turned around to greet him-
Finding his clothes stained with what had to be blood. His hair was all messed up as well and he had a bruise on his cheek. You exhaled. “Looks like somebody had a long night shift.”
“What are you doing this early in the morning?” He took off his shoes that you noticed were quite muddy. It hadn’t rained in a few days so you briefly wondered where he had been, but you shook your head.
No questions asked. That was the rule.
“Prepared breakfast? For you,” you scratched your suddenly itchy neck. “For obvious reasons. Last attempt to bribe you before you announce your decision.”
Yunho scanned you for a few moments before he said, “I should change first.”
“Of course,” you nodded. “I’ll set the table in the meantime.”
Yunho nodded and went upstairs, going to the room at the end of the hallway and dumping his shirt and trousers in the washing machine, turning it on. He needed to get rid of the blood as soon as possible and detergent wouldn’t be enough so he grabbed a soap and rubbed the stains on his shirt for good measure- now, the clothes would wash themselves. 
It was almost a mechanical routine now, he scoffed at how his hands worked on their own now. He went to his room, unlocking it and changing into sweats. Usually, he didn’t eat much before sleeping- after all, due to his night shifts, he slept for most hours of the day and breakfast wasn’t something he cared about, but the smell of beef was making his stomach rumble. He figured he could make an exception today.
By the time he joined you at the table, there were a variety of dishes in front of him and he raised a brow at you. “You really went all out, huh?”
“Of course I would,” you shrugged. “But I’ll be honest. I got most of these side dishes as a gift from one of my friends from work.”
Yunho nodded, thanking you for the meal and eating silently, waiting and waiting but you never asked him about his bloody clothes. Did you dismiss it because you thought it might be from a patient? Or because you simply didn’t care? Was he lucky then, having found you as his housemate? Because one of the qualities he needed in his housemate that he simply couldn’t have stated in the form was a lack of curiosity or inquisitiveness. It was different than being nosy- he could deal with nosy but not someone who would overstep their boundaries because they were curious.
It was why he was apprehensive of you at first. You were a writer. Writers had to be curious and inquisitive, and you were. He knew you were only beginning right now, but the few occasions you had been curious, he was thrown off. And for the right reasons-
“As a doctor, do you think it’s more painful to bleed to death or to drown?”
“As a doctor… do you think a sharp pencil stab to the jugular vein could be fatal?”
That was really all you ever asked him. His opinion as a doctor. You asked with such simplicity that he couldn’t help but stop whatever he was doing and really think about the answer-
“I personally think it’s more painful to drown. The water burns you from the inside. Bleeding to death… you stop feeling things at a certain point and it gets easier from there.”
“Well, it depends on the location of the stab but I reckon if it’s around the base of the neck, it could be fatal. But it would have to be embedded quite deep, and then extracted so a person can bleed to death. If it stays in, there’s no point.”
And his answers would earn him your satisfaction and suddenly, you would be muttering to yourself and going for your room, probably to note it down. He had done his research there too- if he was going to have you as his housemate, he needed to do a background check on you. He didn’t find anything odd in your socials- you tended to stay anonymous and most of your blogs were writing-focused. And when he snooped in your room while you were away grocery shopping, he only found various notes and books on crime and methods of serial killers. He was ashamed to admit he spent quite some time on that book and learned a lot.
So now, having finished the delicious breakfast (you really were a good cook) and finding you uninterested in his whereabouts and the aching bruise on his cheek, he finally cracked the first smile in three days. 
“I’ll let you live if you take care of the house like you have been so far. And you really don’t need to wait for me during meals. The rules are still the same.”
You let out a breath you didn’t realise you had been holding and laughed in relief. “Thank you. I’ll stick by the rules, and I’ll probably have dinner with you if I’m not busy- I don’t like eating alone, to be honest. You can pretend I’m not there if that’s what bothers you. Also…”
When Yunho urged you to continue, your shoulders relaxed in relief but your brows crunched in annoyance. “Do you have to bring your muddy shoes inside? I just cleaned.”
Yunho looked towards the doorway. “I can’t leave them out.”
“Well, I can’t have muddy shoes inside, so you’ll have to do something about it yourself or else I’ll be annoyed and have to clean them myself and you do not want me cleaning your shoes-”
“Okay,” Yunho waved a hand to shut you up. “I’ll take them off on the porch next time.”
“Good,” you folded your arms, considering him. “I think we’re good then.”
Yunho narrowed his eyes. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be saying that…”
“Well, now that we’ve settled everything, I hope you and I will get along,” you extended your hand and he warily shook it, aware of how small your hand was in his. “Now, since you’re a doctor, I must ask if you’ll take care of the loud bruise on your cheek before you sleep. We don’t want it looking worse than it already is.”
“I’ll take care of it,” he assured, and he couldn’t help but continue. “Aren’t you going to ask?”
“I’ll admit that I’m curious, but I won’t break a rule- and I won’t be tricked into breaking one either,” you winked at him and once again, he found himself smiling. “I’ll just assume you had a bad day at work or a rough case. You must often get them as a… surgeon?”
He nodded and you started stacking the dishes. “You can go rest now. I’ve installed a clothesline in the backyard- I really wonder where you’ve been drying your clothes all this time, but I won’t ask. You should try hanging your clothes outside this time.”
For a moment, Yunho wondered if he should have kicked you out.
“I just have a question before you disappear,” you turned and he paused in his tracks, wondering if his stealth was worsening. “It’s an odd one, for my book, but… approximately how long would a healthy man suffer with a stab wound to this area-” you rubbed the left side of your stomach, “- given the weapon is an old 12-inch kitchen knife that’s been sharpened way too many times?”
For a moment, Yunho wondered if he had forgotten to lock the cabinet in the kitchen that contained all of his knives. “You’re uh… oddly specific.”
“I have to be,” you shrugged.
“Well…” Yunho rubbed his chin, thinking of all the patients and victims he had dealt with so far. “Can I sleep on it?”
—-----------------------
Your life was finally not falling apart, for once.
In fact, perhaps this was the calmest that things had been for a good few years now, you mused to yourself as you mopped the floor, your usual instrumental playlist on a considerable volume playing in the living room. Ever since you graduated and had to face the reality of navigating through life as an adult, mostly on your own, you had to tackle a lot of struggles and obstacles. Sure, things got better when you finally signed a contract with a publishing company and started writing for them, but whenever you thought things calmed down, there was always something happening to make you feel like everything was falling apart once again.
Like a few weeks ago when you had to move out of your apartment that you had lived in for three years because the owner decided to sell the building and every tenant had to empty their apartment on a rather short notice. You were compensated but that wasn’t enough because everything was so expensive now. You couldn’t go back to your hometown- if you went back, you would never be able to leave again. So you scoured the internet and found your current place.
And things were finally okay. You did not have to worry about rent- you were doing a good job at maintaining the house and feeding the owner proper meals and so far, he had no complaints with you (he told you if he ever did, he would make sure you knew). You were now able to keep up with your weekly deadlines and finally able to overcome your writer’s block- all thanks to Yunho.
Over the past two weeks, while you could not say that Yunho had warmed up to you, he was getting there alright. You could tell because he stopped complaining about you overcleaning- or perhaps, he admitted defeat. He also stopped protesting when you joined him for dinner before he left for work at night and it was then you would ask him all the questions you had- mostly injuries related, sometimes medical law, but you found that he was knowledgeable in legal law as well. He was never curious about why you asked him all your odd questions, but one day, he asked you what exactly you were writing.
“I’m writing about a female detective who’s assigned to a case of serial killings in her precinct. The serial killer is a strange one because he does not have a fixed method of killing and his victim pool has no pattern, and at first the detective believes that there is a group of them which may or may not be working together, but towards the end, I reveal that there was only one… and the serial killer was from the same station as her so he always knew what to avoid.”
And that was the only time Yunho looked remotely impressed with what you did- if you didn’t count the time he saw you carrying a tower of books and wondered how a tiny thing like you could carry so much. After that, whenever you told him about your progress during dinner (you insisted you needed to talk out loud about it and if he didn’t want to hear it, he could say so because you were used to talking to the walls) he would offer clarifications at least about the things that concerned him. You asked him if he had dealt with a lot of fatal wounds in surgery.
“When I was a beginner, that’s when I got the worst of them,” he admitted. “But I don’t work in the fancy hospitals anymore. With some of my colleagues, we opened our own private clinic. The hospital life wasn’t for me- at least not right now.”
That was all he offered about his personal life and you didn’t ask why he couldn’t handle a hospital life right now. Perhaps, he was going through some of his own troubles like you were too. He tended to spend most of his free time out anyway so you figured that medical practice wasn’t the only thing he was doing.
Plus, he had a thing for cars- old, beaten up cars that he would fix in his garage that he called his ‘workshop’. He would dedicate his weekend to those cars and would become so absorbed that he would forget to eat. One time, you made a smoothie for him because he had skipped his meal and when you went to the garage and cleared your throat, he appeared in your vision, all rough and messed up. You stifled your smile and raised the glass in your hand. He simply asked you to leave it in the corner and go away. 
He forgot to drink that and you found it the next day in the same spot, to your dismay. 
You sighed to yourself when you recalled that day, placing the mop next to the wall while you cleaned the window in the living room. You spotted a car in front of your neighbour’s house where the old couple lived and you figured it might finally be their son paying them a visit. You had actually met the couple while on your way to the convenience store and they asked you if the doctor was giving you any trouble.
“I don’t know why he couldn’t have a housemate for so long,” the old woman shook his head in worry. “He’s such a kind young man. He checks on us every weekend even though he is busy and he makes sure we go to our monthly checkups.”
“Really?” That was unexpected. “Sounds like a kind young man indeed.”
She laughed. “You must be a good person if you’ve stuck around for this long. If he gives you any trouble, just let me know and I’ll give him an earful, yeah?”
You let out a short laugh, wanting to tell her that it was probably the other way round, but it had you wondering why his previous housemates didn’t last long enough with him. He wasn’t a very strict person and the rules weren’t something one couldn’t obey. Was it because of his cold demeanour? You had to admit that he was very mysterious and sometimes, you wondered just what exactly he did other than his medical practice. 
Maybe curiosity does kill the cat, so you would let it go.
You were just stacking the mops back in the shed when you heard the sound of Yunho’s bike- you could recognise the sound of his bike now- it wasn’t too loud like other bikes but had a deep sound. You turned to find him parking it in the garage and you checked your wristwatch.
“You’re… early today.”
It was half past four, the sun just starting to illuminate the sky. He usually came back when the sun was fully out. He took off his helmet and ran his hand through his hair, scanning you.
“Yes, I am,” he got off the bike, not offering an explanation. You didn’t need one either. He simply nodded at you once in greeting before going inside-
Leaving a trail of muddy boot prints again.
Cursing at him, you grabbed the mop and started cleaning after him, noticing he took off his shoes on the porch this time. You made a face at the shoes, wishing you could have made it at him and picked them up and wiped them on the grass to get most of the mud off before setting them back on the porch. When you got inside, Yunho cleared his throat.
“You don’t have to take care of my shoes, I’ve said it multiple times-”
“I just cleaned,” you clenched your jaw, turning to him. “Look. You’ve got rules in this house, and as your housemate, I’ll state my rules too.”
“Oh?” He looked amused. “Please, carry on.”
“Wipe your shoes on the grass before you take them off on the porch,” you exhaled, a weight off your shoulders. “I hate it when I have just cleaned the entire house and you come from work with your muddy shoes trampling all over my hard work.”
“Trampling might be a strong word…”
“You get my point,” you glared at him and he straightened, nodding. This was the first time he saw you angry and-
He was trying his best not to laugh right now.
“Any other rules?” He managed to ask without cracking up.
“Just…” you looked around. “Oh yes, I’ve got one. When you wash your hands in the sink, you should wipe your hands with that towel-” you pointed at the twin bunny hand towels hanging by the hook you attached on the wall next to the sink. “You can use the blue one. I have the towel for the purpose that you don’t go around spreading a water trail after yourself.”
This time, Yunho turned around and finally let out the laugh he had been holding back and you stood gaping at him, wondering if you should congratulate yourself for finally making him laugh or if the bubbling thing in your throat was your anger worsening. “What? If you don’t like that, you can kick me out.”
“No,” he turned around to face you, looking down. “I’m… sorry. I won’t do that again, I’ll abide by the rules. You don’t have to get so angry-”
“I’m not angry-”
Yunho stifled another smile, shaking his head as if to stop himself from laughing again and you narrowed your eyes. 
“You can laugh in front of me. I don’t bite.”
But perhaps, that was the wrong thing to say. His smile faded and he went back to being the same, cold doctor. “You should go to sleep now.”
Just like that, he dismissed you. He dismissed you like any other time you almost cracked through his cold, mysterious demeanour. And just like always, you let him dismiss you and left him alone.
He might not kick you out for setting these rules but if you continued to try to get him to break this wall he had built all around him… he would have no other option. Curiosity could kill you, you knew, but you were so curious about what kind of a person he was. You didn’t have many neighbours but the old couple insisted he was very kind and friendly when Yunho had been anything but friendly to you. He had been distant, unapproachable, sometimes talkative but rarely smiling like he had today. You refused to believe that this was who he was. He had the brightest smile and the most heartwarming laugh that you heard today, and you vowed to yourself that even though he might kick you out for crossing boundaries…
You would make him laugh. Slowly, and surely, you would break him.
—--------------------------
Yunho had had a few eventful days and perhaps, work was the only place he felt at home now, surrounded by all of his friends who knew him. Knew who he was. Knew and didn’t judge him for being the kind of person that he was. Sure, in his own home, he felt comfortable too (except for when a certain someone started nagging) but his true home was with his people.
And to find you pop up at his workplace without a notice made his eyes twitch in annoyance and realise that the urge to kill you might not be as strong as before but it was there alright.
“What are you doing here?” He said through gritted teeth, surprising not only the old lady from next door but also the staff who walked past you. 
“Jeong Yunho, that is no way to talk to a lady!” The woman said, shaking her head in disappointment and when you saw Yunho’s features soften when he met her gaze, you scoffed. “She was kind enough to walk me here- I’m having a lot of trouble with my vision all of a sudden.”
“You should have called the ambulance then,” Yunho frowned, taking the woman’s hand and guiding her across the hallway, disappearing at the end and you pursed your lips, deciding to take a seat in the waiting area.
You looked around- the clinic was big enough and the staff had been kind. It looked like it ran well. There weren’t many people here right now- only a few patients in the waiting and you read the board to see that there were a number of doctors available- a gynaecologist, dentist, paediatrician, psychiatrist, nephrologist, eye specialist, ent specialist and orthopaedic surgeon. You were reading the names of all the doctors when you felt eyes on you and you saw a man in a lab coat watching you with mild amusement. You looked away but when you realised he was still staring, you raised a brow at him and he finally approached you.
“I happened to see your interaction with Yunho earlier, and couldn’t help but wonder if you were the new housemate we’ve heard so much about?”
You were rendered speechless- first of all, he seemed to be pretty damn close with Yunho. Either that or he was nosy, but you knew Yunho wasn’t the type to keep nosy people around. And then… 
The housemate ‘we’ had heard so much about?
“Uh… You’re telling me that Dr. Jeong Yunho talks about me? Here? At his workplace? Who might you be?”
“I’m Dr. Jung Wooyoung,” he extended his hand and you shook it. “I’m the dentist here, and an old friend of Yunho’s. I don’t know if he mentioned but our friend group opened up this clinic here.”
“He mentioned colleagues, not friends,” you told him and he shook his head in disappointment. “But nice to meet you, doctor. I’m y/n, the housemate Yunho talks about a lot- all good things, I hope?”
Thus, Wooyoung started retelling every conversation he had with him about you and you found him very easy to talk to. There was just something about him that invited you to relax and let loose, and soon after you heard that Yunho had told them all about you being a nagger and a clean-freak weirdo writer, you were complaining about how Yunho was borderline mean to you and you found it hard to believe that he was the warm, kind and funny person that Wooyoung insisted he was.
“I mean… the lady that I brought with me? Our neighbour? I told her she was wrong when she said that Yunho was a kind young man, but you’re saying he’s the funny one? I haven’t seen him smile in days, Wooyoung.”
“He’ll get used to you in no time,” Wooyoung waved his hand in dismissal. “You just gotta keep trying. Me? I cracked him in two days.”
“No way,” you laughed. “I’ve only made him laugh once and it’s been about a month-”
“Haven’t you got patients waiting for you, Dr. Jung?” 
You froze, turning around slowly to see a tense Yunho standing at the corner, watching you two for god knows how long. You were about to apologise to Wooyoung for keeping him back but Wooyoung scoffed at Yunho.
“I expected better from you, mate. I like this one- I’m taking her to Hongjoong’s room,” Wooyoung said, getting up and helping you up too, steering you by your shoulders towards the hallway even though you protested and when you looked back to catch a glimpse of Yunho, you caught him shaking his head in disappointment-
But he let out a chuckle. He probably thought you couldn’t see him. He probably laughed because of Wooyoung. But he was going to get so mad at you-
“Don’t worry, he won’t kick you out,” Wooyoung almost whispered, winking at you. “If he tries anything, you come to me, okay? I’ll handle him.”
“Thanks,” you smiled awkwardly. “Where exactly are you taking me?”
“I would have taken you to Mingi, who’s Yunho’s oldest friend and would have given you tips on how to make Yunho give you the princess treatment, but he’s a little occupied right now so I’m taking you to Yunho’s second-oldest friend, Hongjoong.”
“When I accompanied the neighbour lady, I didn’t mean to intrude,” you paused in your tracks, looking at Wooyoung. “I’m not sure I should be here-”
“It’s okay,” Wooyoung assured you with a wide smile. “Relax. Yunho is not some big angry dude who’ll give you an earful at home. I’ll explain- and by now, he probably knows that I’m the one who’s basically kidnapped you.”
You laughed, allowing him to guide you to the eye specialist’s room and when you went inside, you saw the doctor packing his belongings. When he raised his head and brushed the dark strands away, he frowned at Wooyoung. 
“The guest doesn’t look too pleased to be here, Wooyoung.”
“This is Yunho’s housemate,” Wooyoung grinned cheekily and Hongjoong said a loud ‘oh’, greeting you. “She’s the writer, Hongjoong. The crime fiction writer.”
“Ah,” Hongjoong nodded. “I read your book when Yunho told us who you were- ‘In the Silent Hours’? Amazing read.”
You were genuinely touched. “Thank you so much. I wish I could say something, but Yunho hasn’t told me anything about you all.”
“We know,” he laughed. “He can be like that. I hope you had a good experience visiting us, though, and if you have any concerns, you know where to come.”
You looked at Wooyoung who was smiling proudly. “I have way too many questions but I won’t ask- Yunho has a ‘no interfering in personal lives’ policy,” you said and they laughed as if that was the funniest thing Yunho could have done. “I’ll drop by with cookies some day, if you’re okay with that?”
“Sounds great!” Wooyoung clapped. 
“I should really get going now and catch up with Yunho on our neighbour’s condition,” you said, excusing yourself and they enthusiastically said goodbye, making you unable to contain your smile as you made your way back to the entrance where Yunho was discussing something with a nurse-
Goodness, he looked so fucking hot in that lab coat with his hair done. You were positive his outworldly proportions were what made a boring lab coat look so attractive-
He caught you staring and when he finished talking with the nurse, he slowly made his way to you.
“Where’s grandma?” You asked. “Did you find out what’s wrong?”
“We’ve referred her to the nearest hospital and called her family- it seems to be a case of infarct and she’s lucky that she’s still walking and functioning like normal save for her eyes.”
“Oh-”
“And thanks to you bringing her so soon, we’ve managed to minimise the damage,” Yunho actually smiled this time and you let out a breath you didn’t realise you had been holding. “She’s resting right now- they’ll take care of her until her family comes.”
“Thank you,” you smiled. 
“Well…” Yunho checked the time and you did the same- it was almost 2 which meant he would be off soon. “It’s almost time to go home. You walked here?”
“Yeah,” you said. “I should get going then.”
When Yunho didn’t say anything, you said bye and turned to leave but then you heard the familiar voice of Wooyoung shout ‘take her home, don’t be an ass!’ and you stifled a grin, facing Yunho to assure you that you would be okay walking-
“I mean… we’re going to the same place, so… I could make an exception this time- like the other exceptions I’m making,” Yunho narrowed his eyes at you. “I will pretend today didn’t happen.”
“Oh, please, I’ll walk myself home-”
“I’m kidding,” Yunho smiled and you wondered if it was the place that made him comfortable enough to joke with you. “I would have considered dissecting you alive if you dropped by for no reason, but really, you did a good thing today. Think of it as returning the sentiment.”
“I really don’t get you,” you said, ignoring the reference he made to your last inquiry about dissections, waiting for him when he said he would get his things from his room. When he returned with his bag, helmet and without the lab coat, you followed him outside, repeating that. “I really don’t get you, Yunho. You seem like two different people in one body.”
“Perhaps, I am,” he mused. “And perhaps, you’re lucky I’m in a good mood today. Here, wear this.”
He handed you his helmet and you took it, watching him get on his bike. “What about you?”
“I’ll be fine.”
“No, you can wear this, I’ll be fine-”
“Y/n,” he warned, the sudden change in his pitch sending butterflies in your stomach. “Just do as I say. Now, get on and hold on tight. I’m not slowing down for you.”
And perhaps, you should have insisted more on walking back home because he sped through the streets, making you grip his jacket tighter with each passing second, but it was so thrilling that when you reached home, you almost asked for a second round. You took off the helmet and laughed out loud, shaking your head.
“It’s not my first time riding on a bike with someone, but it’s been ages. Can I get another ride one day?”
“Don’t even think about it,” Yunho warned, helping you get off and then parking the bike in his garage. “And I hope you don’t have any questions regarding my workplace today.”
“Oh, I have many, but…” you motioned to your lips, zipping them shut and Yunho nodded in approval, unlocking the house and going inside first. You muttered ‘ass’ and went to the kitchen, heating up everything you had made today, mind still plagued with the events of today.
—-----------------------
You finished plating the steaks, satisfied at your presentation, the cheese perfectly melted on top of the fried crust. It smelled heavenly and since you now knew that Yunho was an actual food enthusiast and a surprisingly gentle and constructive critic, the simple chore of cooking became something you started looking forward to.
When you lived alone, you never made much effort to cook for yourself, but now, things were different. Your house owner was reducing your rent in exchange for home-cooked meals and you could deliver, so you waited for Yunho who would be coming downstairs any minute- he had informed you that he had to leave for work early today so you prepared accordingly, though anyone could tell you were putting more effort into the meals now.
And that was because ever since the day in Yunho’s clinic, it looked like he was finally starting to consider you more than a housemate. You couldn’t exactly call yourselves friends- the rules were still the same, but perhaps, Yunho liked that you were a person of your word. You never talked about that day in the hospital, neither did you ask him about his friends. You never asked him what happened if he came back home at an odd time or if he suddenly went out in the middle of the night. You both respected each other’s boundaries and perhaps, that was what made him start opening up to you.
It wasn’t much, no. It was the little things- him offering to help you arrange the grocery or join you when you watched netflix. He would scroll on his phone, occasionally comment on whatever you were watching and then leave. It was him actually cleaning after himself when he accidentally brought his muddy shoes inside- you gave him a thumbs-up to acknowledge his effort and even that got him flustered, which you thought was cute. And it was him actually taking interest in what you were writing instead of giving answers to the questions you asked. 
When you heard his footsteps down the stairs, you pretended to be busy setting the table and he made an impressed face as he took a seat. 
“This is new,” he commented, waiting for you to sit before he could dig in.
“I’ve had this recipe for a while and finally felt the urge to try it,” you told him. When he took the first bite and nodded in approval, you relaxed and began eating yourself. 
“It’s been about two months. You don’t have to worry about what I think about your cooking. I’ll have it even if it doesn’t taste like something straight out of a restaurant.”
“Can’t tell if it’s a joke or not, but I like it when the other person starts first- when I cook,” you said. He understood. He always seemed to understand where you came from, which was why you both rarely ever disagreed on things.
“It’s really good,” he said. “Also, I wanted to, uh, inform you- there’s a fundraiser happening at the clinic to help the patients who can’t afford to pay their bills. If you would like to participate…”
You passed him a side-eye. “That’s not you talking, is it?”
“You’re right,” he looked guilty. “Wooyoung and Hongjoong forced me to. Something about… cookies?”
“Oh? They remember?”
“They said it’s a good opportunity to flaunt your baking skills if you’re up for it,” Yunho shook his head in thought. “I personally think it’s okay if you don’t want to bake for strangers-”
“When is it?”
“This weekend.”
“I can do it,” you said and when he looked like he was regretting asking you, you continued, “If you have some qualms about me personally attending it, I could just bake the cookies and you could take them with you.”
“No, it’s not that,” he scratched his neck. “It’s…”
“I know, and I don’t mind,” you assured him. “I agreed to your terms when I decided to move in here. I won’t interfere in your workspace if that is what you want-”
“No, it’s okay. It’s just… new for me too,” he admitted and you paused, a bit surprised to hear that. “I’ll let you know the timings-”
His gaze stuck on the kitchen counter for a few moments, prompting you to follow it and see that he was staring holes into the knife holder. You looked at Yunho again to make sure if that was what he was staring at and then his gaze went to the cabinet at the left end of the kitchen-
“Where did you get those knives?”
For a moment, you wondered if his change of tone was something you were imagining until he got up and slowly walked to the counter where the knife holder was, taking out one of the knives and examining it and then almost rushing towards the cabinet at the left end and opening it-
“I told you not to touch the locked cabinets, didn’t I?”
You would have perhaps trembled under his dark gaze if you weren’t so confused right now. “The locked cabinets, yes? But that one was unlocked?”
Yunho glared at you, knife still in his hand. “When did you check it?”
“I was looking for a knife strong enough to cut meat and I found this cabinet unlocked-”
“You used this knife to cut the meat?”
You could feel your hands get clammy by now, lower lip almost quivering and you hated how small your voice sounded when you said yes. He turned around and almost grunted in pain and you wondered just what you had done so wrong. Almost mechanically, you took another bite of your now cold steak. Yunho came back to his seat but instead of sitting, he dropped the knife on the table with a clang.
“You knew that cabinet used to be locked, didn’t you?” His loud voice shook you and you wondered what effect he would have if he shouted. “You keep breaking rules without breaking them-”
“Well it’s not my fault it was unlocked, okay?” You shouted this time, dropping your utensils on the table, frustrated. “You should have locked it properly then!”
Before he could respond, you stormed off to your room, shutting your door with a bang and he slumped down on his chair, trying to take deep breaths, trying to suppress the feeling of disgust he got when he looked at his half-eaten meal-
Because you fucking used his knife to make a meal for him.
The knife he had killed several people with.
How could he forget to lock it? He couldn’t recall not locking it, but still, how could he be so careless? How could he-
He heard a muffled sound- it was hard to miss because the house was usually very silent, but it had to be the sound of you sobbing and to his surprise, despite everything, something in his heart ached at the sound. Now that the cloud of anger was disappearing, he realised he had reacted irrationally. It was his fault for not making sure the cabinet with his murder weapons was locked. He kept them in the kitchen so it wouldn’t be suspicious if someone saw, but still, he should have hidden them well. And then what he said about you continuing to break rules when he himself invited you to the fundraiser-
Yes, Wooyoung suggested it but it was ultimately him who invited you. Yunho shook his head, disappointed in himself and wondered what to do. He came to the conclusion that for now, he needed to collect his thoughts while you sobbed. Shit, he thought. He must have scared you a lot. He had been told way too many times that he was a scary person when angry, and you did not have to see that when you spent an hour making him such a good meal. 
So, disappointed and praying to the heavens above that you at least washed the knives properly before you used them, he resumed eating, almost gagging through the rest of the meal and when he was done and had one glass of cool water down his system to calm himself, he finally mustered the courage to get up, be a man and apologise to you.
The thing about you, he realised since you moved here, was that you were odd in a charming way. When he was looking for a housemate who would maintain the house and cook, he didn’t expect someone who was so dedicated to the task. You were busy too, but it looked like you had shifted your schedule to adjust to his. When he was gone to work, you slept, and when he came back, you would be waiting for him. You had added life to this house and he couldn’t believe how much his mood had changed now that the house looked like a home and he ate well. 
You always gave and gave, expecting nothing in return. Perhaps, that’s just who you were. A good person, someone he could only wish to be. Someone who only wrote about horrible crimes instead of actually committing them. Someone who believed that her house owner was a respectable doctor and not a part-time serial killer as well.
That was debatable too. He had a purpose- he didn’t kill randomly. He only killed the people who deserved it. But that was a story for later- he couldn’t come into your room and tell you that reason, so what the hell was he doing standing in front of your door?
Yunho knocked gently and when you fell silent but didn’t respond, he knocked again. 
“Y/n? Can I come in?”
Silence.
“Please?”
It was the gentleness in his voice that made you mutter a small yes, but only after you wiped your tears away. Truth be told, you weren’t that sensitive. You weren’t sure why you ended up throwing a tantrum and crying tonight but you figured it was long due now. You just wished you could explain to him without becoming a mess again-
And then he opened the door, looking worriedly at you. Worriedly, with his brows scrunched and actions hesitant and you found your vision getting blurry with tears again. 
Dammit. 
You looked away but from the corner of your eye you saw him look around the room once before hesitantly walking to where you were- on the floor, back resting against the bed. To your surprise, he sank down next to you, mirroring your position.
“I don’t know how to say it, but I’m sorry,” he almost whispered. “I shouldn’t have reacted that way. It’s my fault.”
A fresh stream of tears left your eyes and you weren’t sure if it was because of what happened earlier or what he said now. He couldn’t simply come inside your room and apologise and act like it wouldn’t affect you.
“Will you look at me?”
You wiped your tears and turned to face him, hesitating to meet his eyes. He understood. He shifted a bit towards you. “No explanation will make it better, and I’m ashamed that I reacted this way when it’s my fault that I left that cabinet unlocked. I shouldn’t have gotten angry at you when you do so much for me without asking.”
“Yes,” your voice was quivering as much as your lips. “It’s your fault. I mean… I won’t ask but they are just knives, Yunho.”
And then you were crying again at the absurdity of it all and Yunho decided to take responsibility. He patted your head awkwardly and when you buried your head between your knees, he drew closer and wrapped his arms around you, rubbing your back.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” he attempted to sound sincere- he was, but you didn’t need to know that he was also stifling grins. “I scared you, right?”
“You did!” You cried. “Do you know how awful you look when you’re angry? And holding that knife? I thought you were going to stab me, Yunho.”
And this time, Yunho laughed heartily, making you laugh as well and push him away. He put a hand on the side of your face to cup it, still laughing as he said, “Please. Who would cook for me if I killed you?”
“I don’t know,” you pouted. “You have a lot of friends. Maybe one of them could cook for you.”
Yunho smiled at that, wiping your tears away and you suddenly felt conscious of the position you two were in, though he didn’t seem to realise it yet- or he was ignoring it, for once. “Sorry for almost yelling at you. And sorry for saying everything that I did.”
“It’s okay,” you assured him, scanning his features now that you were looking at him up close for the first time. You noticed how warm his eyes could look, how soft his features actually were. He looked perfect, and if it weren’t for all the rules that would cost you a living space, you would have crossed a lot of boundaries by now. “I’m sure you had your reasons- and I should have asked when I found the cabinet unlocked.”
“But that doesn’t justify my behaviour one bit,” he shook his head. “Now, will you come out and finish your dinner?”
“But-”
“I have finished mine,” he told you. “And now you should too. I’ll go heat it up.”
With a pat to your cheek, he left the room, leaving you wrapped in his clean and manly scent. You sighed deeply, avoiding the mirror but wiping your face before taking a seat back at the table. You watched him set the table for you. 
“You should go now,” you said. “You had to leave early. I’ve probably held you back a lot, I’m sorry-”
“I’ll go when you finish eating,” he insisted and you shot him a glare before picking up your fork.
“Just so you know,” you said as you took a bite, Yunho watching you earnestly. “I don’t usually become a crying mess like I just did. I’m stronger than that.”
“Whatever you say.”
“I am,” you glared at him again. “But I have my limit too. And today was all the pent up emotions from the previous two months.”
“All because of me, huh?”
“Don’t think too highly of yourself,” you teased. “I have other things to worry about too.”
“Of course you do,” he smiled.
“Yep. Like deadlines. And chores.”
“I hope the fundraiser won’t conflict with your deadline?”
“It won’t,” you told him. “You’re assuming I’ll attend.”
“I’ll make sure you do,” he said as you finished eating the last bite. “Because I’m the one who’s inviting you.”
Perhaps, this was another step towards a relationship more meaningful than housemates. Perhaps… 
He was finally starting to consider you a friend.
—-------------------------------
Sometimes, Yunho wondered if it was a good decision to have you as his housemate.
It wasn’t that you were doing anything wrong, no. You were perfect. Goodness, you were perfect and he both loved and hated that. He had no idea how he got lucky with you- and he was not thinking about the fact that he got to have delicious meals at home or his place looked maintained. 
It was about the things he could talk to you about, and hell, he didn’t even talk to you much. You probably had no idea how much he enjoyed your little questions about what was the most painful way to die or how you would kill someone in a certain context- it was the only time, perhaps, that he could be himself. He had spent a long time being convinced by his friends that he was not a bad person inside, and perhaps, they were right. But if they were…
Why did he enjoy talking to you about this stuff so much? Was it because these secrets were a burden to him, even though his friends knew? He never told them the details so perhaps, talking about killing people and hurting them in detail with you helped him in some twisted, cathartic way. Whatever it was, he was certain that he was getting addicted to watching you get impressed by his knowledge about such things he claimed was from years of his surgery practice, and he was also ashamedly addicted about how unhinged you sounded when you talked about the criminals in your fiction.
He was positive you couldn’t be an undercover-something. You couldn’t even hurt a fly, let alone a human. But the way you got excited when you talked in detail about a certain type of wound or method of torture… he often found himself zoning out and simply staring at you while you talked. Perhaps, he was the unhinged one, but he found you so attractive when you talked about what you loved writing about, and he was very close to asking you about what made you write such gory crime fiction novels. He would be breaking his own rule of not interfering in each other’s personal lives, but all rules be damned- he had to know what drove you to write all of this.
He was also pretty sure you weren’t as naive as you looked and probably found his habits weird. There was no way he could look redeemable after the knife incident. While you were gone the next day, he personally sanitised all of them because he was sure you were going to keep using those knives. He figured it turned out to be okay in the end- he had to change his murder weapons and method soon anyway. The police were starting to connect a few dots and he was sure they would come with a search warrant any day.
But perhaps, it was a good decision to have you in this house. If the police ever came, you could help with Yunho’s image. He felt guilty for using you for that purpose now that he was almost starting to care about you despite his principles but… in the end, it was all turning out to be good. All was well.
A bit too well, if he had to say, as he watched you get a little too chummy with Mingi and Wooyoung. You had done a good job at the fundraiser, having baked dozens of cookies and with some strange ribbon packaging you claimed was cute. He took care of the stall but you still brought a lot of decoration from the house to give it a personal touch, and not only the visitors but the staff were also impressed by your skills. Now that the event was done and you were wrapping up everything, Mingi and Wooyoung had casually joined you to help and to praise your work. Yunho didn’t miss the subtle glances they threw in his direction as if to tease him, and what could he say?
It was working.
“Are you gonna keep watching her like she’s your next target or are you going to make a move?”
Yunho shut his eyes in mild annoyance before looking to his right where Seonghwa stood with his trademark smile, nodding at the visitors who greeted him before they left. If anyone knew that behind the kind smile of the paeds doctor was one of the masterminds of their team that essentially rooted out the evil from the society… 
“I’d rather watch. I know Mingi or Wooyoung will say something stupid if I approach them now.”
Seonghwa chuckled at that. “She’s done a good job today. She’s extraordinary, Yunho.”
Yunho narrowed his eyes. “Don’t tell me that you two were discussing her novel when you took a break in the cafe.”
“You know what I think?” Seonghwa almost whispered as if letting him in on a secret. “If she was a part of our team, we could actually succeed in working with the police.”
“How?”
“Think about it,” he bowed at one of the elders who passed by. “Imagine her next work is about what we do. Crime fiction to others, but something the police could use to clean up our mess, yeah?”
Once again, Yunho was in awe of the way Seonghwa’s mind worked. “The police would use that to arrest us.”
“Or they would turn a blind eye and let us do their dirty work. Two sides of the coin,” Seonghwa patted Yunho’s back and left to join Hongjoong and Yunho considered what he had said. When he saw Mingi pick something out of your hair, though, he decided he’d had enough.
“Ah, you’re here,” Wooyoung had a shit-eating grin on his face. “Y/n, now is your time to tell us if you’d like to change your houseowner.”
“Nah, I’m good,” you grinned, meeting Yunho’s eyes who looked pleased to hear that. “This one is good at pretending I don’t exist so sometimes I feel like I own the house myself.”
Mingi laughed loudly at that and Yunho smiled in embarrassment. He was guilty, yes. When you noticed his ears getting red, you laughed. “I’m just kidding. I really couldn’t have a better person as a housemate.”
“You’re lying,” Wooyoung smacked your arm playfully and you put the last of the things in your duffel bag.
“You won’t understand,” you simply told Wooyoung and chanced a glance at Yunho who no longer looked embarrassed and offered to take your bag. You let him and said your goodbyes to the two, waving at the rest of the staff who told you to come again (with baked treats) and you followed Yunho to the parking lot. This time, you had made sure he had a spare helmet and when he noticed you grinning, he asked you what was so funny.
“Nothing, I’m just excited to ride your bike again,” you giggled like a kid. “I kind of have a thing for bikes.”
And there it was. Another reason Yunho felt his heart pound rather uncharacteristically. 
Perhaps, that was what prompted him to break one of his biggest rules and ask, “Would you like to have dinner somewhere… with me? You must be too tired to make dinner at home, and I know a quiet spot if you’re up for it- if not… that’s okay too, we could order something instead-”
He paused when he noticed your smile growing and he raised a brow in question. You wanted to tell him that he was rambling (which was cute as hell) but you only nodded. “I’d love to. You’re right, I’m tired- and a quiet spot sounds nice at this hour. I won’t say no to a longer bike ride too.”
Yunho chuckled at that as he put on his helmet. You followed and got on the bike behind him. “It’s not gonna be a short trip if you’re okay.”
“I’m good!” You assured and he told you to hang on tight as he started the heavy bike and started driving towards the darkening horizon. You put your hands on Yunho’s shoulders but as he sped on the emptier roads, you resorted to clutching the sides of his jacket and rested your head on his back, watching the view. You loved how quiet it got in your head at times like these and it almost made you wish this moment would never end.
You didn’t know how much time passed but finally, Yunho started slowing down and you looked up, finding yourself at the riverside. When he parked in an empty space, he got down first and helped you down. You took off your helmet and smoothened your hair, looking around. It seemed to be a remote spot that the tourists had not yet discovered and the pretty lightning bordering the sidewalk illuminated the benches at the distance and-
“Fried chicken!” You grinned. “I didn’t know what I was craving until I smelt it.”
Yunho smiled, motioning you to follow him. He led you inside where you placed your orders and you both decided to take one of the tables outside. There weren’t many people here anyway so you were going to enjoy the cool river breeze.
Now that you sat in front of him, it finally settled in that you were outside with Yunho for the first time. That he offered to take you out for dinner. It didn’t help that he looked absolutely dreamy with his dark hair falling messily on his forehead and his shoulder looking even broader in the black jacket he wore, and when he ran a hand through his hair, swiping it away from his forehead-
He met your eyes and you realised you had been staring. You awkwardly sipped your water and looked towards your left, urging yourself to focus on the sound of the waves instead of the sound of your erratic heartbeat. You cleared your throat. “How did you find this spot? It’s beautiful.”
“I used to live near here when I was little,” he smiled and you thought there was something sad about it. 
“Oh, your parents must still live around here then?” You wondered and when his smile fell, you knew you had asked a question you shouldn’t have. 
But to your surprise, he answered, “They passed away when I was in highschool. I had to move out soon, so I couldn’t come back here for a good few years.”
“Oh, I’m… sorry to hear that,” you said and he told you it was okay. “I can tell why this place is close to your heart though. It’s wonderful here.”
“Yeah, it is,” he said and you were glad your chicken arrived at that moment, breaking the awkwardness from your conversation. “How did today go? You’re quite popular at the clinic now.”
You grinned, “Nobody can resist chocolate chip cookies, apparently. Wooyoung said I helped raise a lot of money.”
“You did,” Yunho confirmed and you both took a bite of the chicken. You groaned in appreciation.
“I don’t know if it's the river or the vibe,” you said after swallowing the first bite. “But doesn’t the chicken taste so good here?”
“There’s a reason I brought you here,” he laughed at the way you stared at the chicken. “Good food and a killer view.”
It took you both a few pieces to get comfortable and this time, when you asked him about the clinic and all his friends, he answered all your questions. You learned that Yunho and Mingi were school friends and Yunho met Hongjoong at the end of highschool. Their group expanded over the years and today, after years of studying and working together, they had their own place. 
Yunho also asked you about your recent progress and you complained about your publishers. He then asked where you were originally from and he learned that you were from a small town at the outskirts of the city and had a younger brother but your relationship with your family was a bit strained so you didn’t visit them often. He also found that you didn’t have many friends, just a few you met annually. He realised then why it was so easy for you to get comfortable with Wooyoung and Mingi- perhaps, they reminded you of your friends, or maybe you missed normal human interaction. 
As you finished eating, you asked him what urged him to really bring you here tonight. Yunho looked at you as if to make you reconsider your question but when you held your front, he finally gave in. “Just wanted to say thanks.”
“For what?”
“For everything,” he shrugged. “You do a lot. I haven’t done anything in return.”
“Uh, forty percent off?”
“Yeah,” he laughed. “Just accept the sentiment and shut up.”
“Yes sir,” you saluted and he paid the bill, insisting it was his treat even though you asked to split the bill. “Well, if you won’t let me pay, maybe we can walk a little before we go?”
“That makes no sense, but okay,” Yunho said, shaking his head in amusement and you took the lead, going towards the edge to peek down at the river and then you started your stroll.
“Isn’t it nice to get some fresh air?” You commented, taking a deep breath. “No worries, just the river and us.” 
Yunho nodded silently and you grinned. “If you have more spots like these… don’t hide them from me.”
“Just this one,” he admitted and you nodded, satisfied. “What about you? Do you have a spot like this?”
You had… until everything went horribly wrong. You had a place so close to your heart that you hadn’t visited in years-
“You okay?” Yunho asked worriedly, having noticed your smile drop.
“Uh, yeah,” you pursed your lips. “I had one. I don’t go there anymore- bad memories.”
“Ah… sorry I asked-”
“It’s okay,” you assured. “If I grow the guts one day… I’ll take you there.”
“You don’t have to-”
“Just shut up and accept the offer,” you winked at him and he grinned at your statement. You noticed you had already walked around the area, the parking lot in your vision now. Before you could walk towards it, Yunho called your name, making you pause in your tracks.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure?”
“Did you mean it when you said… earlier at the clinic…” Yunho put his hands in his pockets awkwardly, trying to phrase it better. “When you-”
“When I said you were a good housemate?” You asked, internally smiling because you just knew he would end up asking you to elaborate. “I meant it.”
“Why? I have been anything but nice.”
“That’s a lie,” you pointed out. “Just because you have a few rules you’re strict about doesn’t mean you’re not nice company when you’re in a good mood. And you answer all my weird questions without judgement!” You clapped your hands. “What more could I ask for?”
When you saw that he didn’t look convinced, you took a deep breath. “To be honest, my life was falling apart before I moved in with you. Everything started going wrong at the same time. It was too much and I really thought I would have to go back to my hometown- and I would go anywhere but there. So when we made a deal? Yes, I thought you were strange at first but I couldn’t complain, and now that we’ve… warmed up to each other a bit, you’re not bad company at all, Yunho. You may still be an asshole about your rules,” you laughed and he joined, the corners of his lips curving downwards- was he flustered? “But I can see why the people at the clinic like you. You’re quite dependable.”
“That’s…”
“Too much?” You laughed. “In short, you gave me a nice deal and my life is finally back to normal, and you’re a good person, you idiot. That’s all I’m saying.”
“I think you’re getting a little too comfortable with me though…”
“Yeah?” You walked towards the bike. “Says the guy who basically took me on a date.”
And there it was again- the flustered smile of his that was so endearing, the ears turning red and the nervous laugh as he wondered what to do, where to look. You laughed out loud, finding it quite funny.
“You’re a very easy prey, Dr. Jeong,” you teased. “Quite easy to get to.”
“Did you really think of this as a date?” He held his helmet, waiting for your answer and you thought about it.
“Platonic date?” You wondered. “Outing? Icebreaking party? Whatever you wanna name it…”
You faltered when he stepped closer and looked down at you, scanning your face. Suddenly, you were so conscious of the proximity between you two. The dim lights made his gaze look darker and you wished you could take a peak in his mind. He brought his hand up and tucked your hair behind your ear ever so gently, lightly caressing your cheek-
And then he poked you in the middle of the forehead, making you wince out loud.
“I’m still the grumpy mysterious owner,” he quoted what you had said to Wooyoung today and you gaped at him, wondering if he had heard the entirety of the conversation. “So don’t get too ahead of yourself, okay?”
You rubbed your forehead, muttering okay and complaining about how he could have just said so. But when you wore your helmet and settled down behind him, clutching at the sides of his jacket, he held your hands in his and you couldn’t even digest how his big hands engulfed your small ones before he wrapped your arms around his waist.
“It’s better this way- I’m speeding,” he said.
“I really don’t get you, Yunho,” you told him and he cast you a glance before starting to drive, speeding as promised. You were pretty sure he wouldn’t have cared if you held on to the sides of his jacket like earlier or his shoulders for dear life but… 
But you wouldn’t complain. So you rested your head against his back again, bodies flush against each other and you let yourself feel whatever you were feeling for the ride back home.
—---------------------------- 
It was a good day today- somewhat productive because you were almost done writing your book and the editor was pleased with your work too. Yunho was having dinner with his colleagues tonight so you decided not to cook and just have the leftovers from yesterday for dinner then and went to your room to finally sort out the mess you had been avoiding ever since you moved in-
The books.
While you had lined all your books along the walls, creating towers of them that you were scared would one day fall on you if you ever made a clumsy mistake, you had realised that perhaps it was time you let go of some of the books. You could already feel your heart being broken at the thought but your room was starting to look too congested compared to the rest of the spacious house so you would have to make a little sacrifice. 
So you spent hours sorting through the books and almost didn’t hear Yunho coming downstairs until he knocked on your room, eyes widening at the books around you.
“Yeah, I know I’m a mess,” you said. “Are you leaving?” 
“Yeah,” Yunho nodded, laughing in what seemed to be shock. “Do you need… help?”
“No, I’m just sorting them out,” you dismissed, though surprised at the offer. “I’ll be fine.”
“Okay,” Yunho was still lingering at the doorway. “Well, I don’t know when I’ll be back, so…”
“Have fun,” you looked at him, grinning. “I’ll be fine. This is something I do annually.”
“If you say so. Don’t get lost in there,” he teased and you rolled your eyes, shooing him away. 
And that was that. You didn’t even realise how much time passed- you kept getting distracted as you held each book in hand and recalled the memories associated with it. It was only when the doorbell rang that you frowned, checking the clock. It was 09:47 pm- who could it be? Not Yunho- he had his keys. Maybe the woman from next door?
But when you opened the door to two grown men with badges around their necks, you did a quick scan, realising two things- that they were detectives, and one of the faces was way too familiar.
“Good evening, miss,” the younger one said. “We’re Detectives Lee and Seo from the station-”
“Y/n?” The older one- the familiar face called your name and suddenly, it clicked-
It clicked. Everything you had buried deep inside you, somewhere so deep that you hadn’t thought about it in perhaps a year, was suddenly out and washing over you like a wave of cold water. Everything from about two decades ago started flashing in front of your eyes and you gulped down the thing stuck in your throat with immense effort. 
“Detective Seo?” Your voice sounded small even to your ears. 
“It’s been a while,” he looked as confused as you. “I didn’t expect to see you here- doesn’t this house belong to a Doctor Jeong Yunho?”
“You’re right,” you told him. “I live on the first floor on rent.”
“I see… Can we come in then?”
“If you’re here to meet Dr. Jeong, he’s not home right now-”
“We can wait,” he told you. “Besides… it’s been a while- won’t you invite us for tea?”
“You can’t just visit so late at night and expect tea,” you folded your arms, finally getting a grip. “What is the purpose of your visit, really?”
“We really needed a statement, or anything from the doctor,” Detective Seo said. “Let us wait for him for half an hour, and then we’ll leave.”
You considered kicking them out but then figured they could wait. Yunho would probably be late and they would have to go back after half an hour without anything. Plus, it didn’t look like Detective Seo was about to budge anytime soon. The other detective also looked intrigued and you gave in, allowing them to the living room though just like two decades ago, Detective Seo made a point of roaming around-
“That your room?” He pointed at the mess of books and you stifled the urge to pass a biting remark.
“Yes, I was a little busy as you can probably see. Please, take a seat.”
While you asked Detective Lee if he would like some tea, you kept an eye on the older detective who was now looking around the living room. You turned on the kettle- there was no way you were going to serve them the fancier teas you had. They would have to make do with teabags.
“How long since you moved here?”
“Is that related to your current investigation?” You asked and he scoffed.
“Come on, y/n. Don’t act like we’re strangers here. Are you still in contact with your family?”
And there it was.
“Not really,” you simply said. “I moved out for college and only visit annually.”
“How’s your mother doing?”
Your mother. Your brother. The people who destroyed you.
“She’s okay, probably,” you said. Your voice was already starting to crack, and that was not a good sign. The kettle turned off and you poured the boiling water carefully into the cups, wondering if Yunho returning early would make things better or worse.
“I moved here around that time too,” he said, taking the cup from you with thanks and after giving the other to Detective Lee, you went to stand near the kitchen, folding your arms again. “I visit a lot though. I heard your brother got into a good college.”
“Yeah, well,” you pursed your lips. “I suppose he did.”
“Do you still blame yourself for what happened back then?”
You pretended to not hear that question and asked the detective to take a seat. It was getting annoying now that he walked casually towards the kitchen, scanning the notes stuck on the fridge- Yunho’s “eat your dinner pls” that you only noticed now, your to-do list and grocery list, and the silly magnets. He made a face and placed his empty cup on the sink-
And then he spotted the knife holder.
“That’s a lot of knives,” he commented.
“I cook. A lot,” you said, wishing you had made that teabag tea for yourself too- anything to keep you from squirming. The detective looked at you suspiciously before taking his hand out of his pocket-
“Do not touch my knives, Detective,” you glared at him. “Can you please get out of the kitchen and wait in the living room?”
“I’m just looking,” he dismissed you and to your annoyance, took out one of the knives to examine, and then the other, then the other-
“I said, do not touch my knives.”
Yunho, who was standing outside the house near the kitchen window that was slightly ajar so he could hear everything, felt his heart swell in pride and admiration- he had never heard you state anything as strongly before. He contained in his sigh of relief, wondering if now was the right time to barge in.
Truth be told, he had spotted their car as soon as he entered the street and at first he thought that you had broken one of the rules and invited someone but upon a closer look, he realised with dread that the car belonged to the detectives who had just recently connected one of the cases with his clinic. He parked his bike in the garage and when he heard voices from the kitchen window, he went to eavesdrop and realised that they had just entered.
“No need to get so angry over some kitchen knives,” Detective Seo’s voice was stern. “What do you need so many for anyway? Are they yours?”
“I’m the only one who can cook,” you were seething now. “And what’s it to you?”
“Well, this one looks oddly familiar.”
“Yeah? It’s for cutting vegetables, Detective. I bet your wife owns it too- if you have one. That one’s for dicing, the one on top for fish because I feel like it remains stinky so it’s only for fish. You have a problem with that?”
Yunho stifled a smile- you were rambling now. He wondered why you didn’t simply tell them that they were his knives originally. He was positive the detectives would be connecting the dots right away and going back for an arrest warrant-
“Well, you see,” Detective Seo picked the longest knife out. “This one?”
“For meat,” you muttered. 
“This one matches the murder weapon in the case we’re investigating,” he looked at you. “12 inches, dull but sharpened far too many times.”
“Yeah?” You scoffed. “So someone’s committed murder with a kitchen knife? They’re a genius.”
“How so?”
“Who doesn’t own a kitchen knife?” You almost cried. “They’re probably making a fool out of you, go back to your home and look in your kitchen. You probably have a 12 inch dull meat knife too.”
“How would you know?” Detective Lee asked this time. “That they’re making a fool out of us?”
“Why else would they use such an inconvenient weapon? Either for the thrill, or to make a fool out of you. Or both. Just… put the knife back, okay?”
“You’ve always been an odd one, and you always knew way too much,” Detective Seo put the knife back but narrowed his eyes at you. “Where were you on the 17th around midnight?”
“Around midnight, every day of every year for the past few years, I’ve been home. And I hope you go raiding everyone’s kitchen now that you know what your murder weapon looks like. Also, why are you even here? To investigate me? Again?”
“We came for Dr. Jeong-”
“You think he goes around committing murder only to operate on them later in his clinic? He’s a doctor, for Christ’s sake,” you shut your eyes, feeling a burning sensation in both your throat and eyes. “Please, leave. You can meet Dr. Jeong elsewhere- I’ll ask him to contact you.”
“And why are you getting so jittery?” Detective Seo asked. “Is there something you’re hiding again? Someone you’re protecting again? Or are you just protecting yourself-”
Yunho couldn’t take it anymore- he’d heard enough, and the whimper that left you made his vision dark for a moment. Rushing to the front door, he unlocked it and entered, shutting it a bit loudly to prove a point-
And saw you standing in the middle of the room, curling in on yourself, eyes weary. If hearing you sound like that wasn’t enough, having to look at you in this state was worse and he wished he had acted earlier. He didn’t know what took over him but he rushed to you and wrapped you in his arms-
And when you buried your face in his chest, relaxing instantly in his grasp, red hot anger ran through his veins as he assessed the detectives who stood awkwardly around him.
“How dare you make my girl cry?” He almost growled, wrapping his arms tighter, almost possessively around you. “What are you doing here?”
Detective Seo shook his head in disbelief and Detective Lee took the lead. “We came to talk to you about a few things- it’s very hard to reach you-”
“So you come barging into my house and bombard someone unrelated with questions and make her cry?” Yunho scoffed. “A phone call? Summoning me to the station? Or at least a search warrant, which I bet you don’t have, just like before. Shall I report you for misconduct?”
“Come on, don’t be like that,” Detective Seo finally butted in. “Y/n and I were just catching up- we’re actually acquaintances-”
You shook your head in Yunho’s grasp to let him know that you did not want to be a part of this ‘catching up’ and Yunho patted your back.
“She says otherwise,” Yunho caressed your hair. “I don’t care if you’ve met before. You’re clearly unwanted. Please, leave. You have my number, you can contact me later, but do not make the mistake of coming here again. And do not try to make contact with her again.”
Shrugging, the detectives left, Detective Lee muttering a silent apology on behalf of them both. When you heard the doors sound shut, you tried getting out of Yunho’s grasp to let him know he didn’t need to do that anymore-
But he only deepened the hug, leaning down this time to hold you better and you sighed at that. He rocked you gently back and forth, all the while caressing your head gently as if he meant to lull you to some calm space- and oh, was he successful. You were no longer crying.
Hesitantly, he broke away a bit to see if you were okay. Your eyes fluttered open, a bit red from crying and he cupped your face, wiping your tears.
“Why did you let them in, y/n?”
“I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry-”
“No, it’s okay,” he assured you. “Did they force themselves inside?”
“Not really, but they were insisting on coming inside and waiting,” you sniffed. “Detective Seo- the older one… he knows me from when I was a kid and he started to get a bit too comfortable-”
“I know,” he told you and when you frowned in confusion, he said, “I actually heard a bit of it while I was parking.”
“A bit?”
“Most of it,” he admitted, breaking into a smile. “You did not have to defend my kitchen knives with all your might, y/n.” 
You chuckled at that. “I don’t know, I got so angry! He kept walking around and it was annoying me so much- I thought giving him tea would make him sit, but no, he had to walk around with a cup in his hand-”
Yunho shook with laughter, shaking his head. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you’re too adorable at times.”
“And… I can’t believe I’m hearing the word adorable come out of your mouth,” you looked at him in disbelief. “Who are you? And where is Dr. Jeong?”
“It’s just Yunho,” he smiled and you smiled back, spending a moment just looking at him and realising that you were still way too close, in his arms, your heart fluttering uncontrollably. 
“Well… just Yunho,” you said, your hands on his waist feeling clammy. “Thank you for coming at the right time. And thank you for… what you did.”
Yunho took a deep breath. “Are you okay?”
You pursed your lips, looking away. You could not answer that, because even if you lied to him, you would break down anyway. Detective Seo had opened the dam of unwanted, ugly memories and you were definitely not okay. You wouldn’t be for a while now-
But it looked like Yunho had made it his life’s mission to make sure you would feel okay. He brought you back in a hug and this time, you didn’t cry. You simply wrapped your arms around his waist better and listened to the sound of his heartbeat which somehow calmed you. To your surprise, he planted a kiss on the top of your head before he squeezed you in assurance.
You broke away to look at him. “What’s got you so… clingy and fluffy all of a sudden? Not that I don’t like it, but…”
Yunho tucked your hair away from your face, kissing your forehead this time and pretending he hadn’t heard that. It wasn’t the first time he got a closer look at you yet he committed everything to memory as if it was his first time seeing you. He couldn’t answer your question either, because…
He was pretty sure he had fallen for you a little when he heard you earlier. The way you never let the detectives think about him for even a second when you were being cornered with the knives- he was absolutely sure that you had not done that unintentionally. Sure, he had initially thought that if he ever got in trouble with the police, you could make a good cover, but now you had protected him on purpose. He would ask you about that, but first…
“Did you eat dinner?”
“Uh… no. I forgot.”
Yunho shook his head in disappointment. “I go away for one meal and you forget to eat.”
You pouted and he led you to the chair, making you sit. He poured a glass of water for you and after you drank it, he asked if you made something today. You told him you didn’t cook today and he sighed.
“So you only cook for me?”
“I like cooking… and I like cooking for you,” you pouted again, feeling exposed.
“But not cooking for yourself?” Yunho asked, making you look at him. “Why won’t you cook for yourself?”
You shrugged. You didn’t have an answer for that. 
“Well, I’m not a good cook, but I’ll see what I can do…” he got up and you told him he did not have to, that what he did for you tonight was enough, but he told you to shut up and opened the fridge, taking out the kimchi and then looking through the cabinets-
“Ramyeon sounds good? That’s one thing I can cook well,” he grinned.
You nodded, getting comfortable and watching him roll his sleeves before he washed his hands in the sink, drying them with the blue bunny towel and then you stopped noticing what he was doing and instead noticed the veins on his arms, the faded scar near the elbow that probably ran up his upper arm, his broad shoulders and narrow waist, the dark hair that curled at the nape of his neck-
And those beautiful, beautiful hands that were now setting the pot on the table. You blinked, coming back to reality, and thanked him for the meal. He watched you eat for a few moments before he said, “I’m sorry you had to go through what you did today. It’s my fault.”
“Yunho,” you sighed, “It’s not.”
“It is,” he shook his head. “The detectives seemed to have created some ambiguous connection between me and their recent murder case. The victim used to be my patient, so they’ve been trying to visit me for a while but I kept putting it off- I really don’t like when they visit my workplace-”
“Of course,” you nodded. “No one would like that. You don’t have to explain it to me, Yunho. You don’t have to tell me anything-”
“Forget the rules,” he clicked his tongue in annoyance. “I want to explain because you can’t just put yourself between me and the detectives. How could you try to protect me without knowing what’s going on? And don’t try to deny that you weren’t doing exactly that.”
You took a bite and thought about it while you chewed. Once you swallowed, you answered. “I’ve known Detective Seo for twenty years. I’ve known you for what? Four months? Five? Guess who I trust more out of the two.”
Yunho looked away, somewhat in disbelief but again, overwhelmed by the way his heart was fluttering and his stomach was in knots. “Even when I’ve given you nothing?”
“It’s enough- I don’t need to hear your life story to trust you,” you finished eating the noodles. “I know who you are, and that’s enough.”
Yunho sighed internally- Wooyoung had warned him of this. He had practically manifested it. He had told Yunho that the way he talked about you and the way he treated you were very different and he needed to start manning up and ignoring whatever he was feeling inside. That had been in the earlier months. And now?
You claimed you knew him. What did you know, really? The person who set strict rules and got angry when he thought you broke one of them and made you cry? The doctor who got angry at you for bringing a patient to his clinic and later thanking you because you saved her from something worse? The person who took you to the place he loved yet told you nothing about it? What did you really know-
“I know you,” you began and Yunho wondered if he had said those thoughts out loud. “You’re the person who I thought was an asshole but I trusted because you… you have the kindest eyes. Even when you almost stabbed me to death-”
“That’s on you overthinking-”
“Yeah, I’m joking,” you laughed. “But… you get what I mean. I don’t need to know who you were, I know who you are. The doctor who’s too busy to take care of himself and his space. The person who’s everyone’s favourite at the clinic. The house owner who’s actually quite funny but takes a while to open up. The friend who helps me with my work in so many more ways than he realises. And… the man who is surprisingly protective and caring.”
Yunho buried his face in his hands- he couldn’t look at you now. He couldn’t-
“I don’t know why you keep holding yourself back, but can I ask what prompted you to do whatever you did earlier? You didn’t have to hug me like that,” you drank the rest of the water in the glass, waiting but he didn’t look at you. “You didn’t have to call me ‘your girl’ and shoo them away. You can’t just do things like that and expect me to remain normal and pretend it didn’t happen the next day- because I’ve had enough too. I’ve had enough of you staring at me like I’m either someone you want to kill or someone you want to… do things to. Also, while we’re talking about that- and yes, I’m rambing, but you really need to stop touching me so casually- I hope you have a rule about that somewhere too-”
Yunho finally removed his hands from his face and locked eyes with you. When you didn’t look away, wondering if you were going to regret this, he got up, making your heart sink thinking you really had made an awful mistake this time-
And then he leaned down towards you and to your utter surprise, he pecked your lips gently- once, twice. And then he pulled away to lock eyes with your wide ones. 
“Can I take responsibility then? For my actions?”
When you nodded without realising that you had, he smiled, going around the table and sinking down to his knees. For you. You found your hands moving of their own accord, cupping his face with almost trembling hands for the first time and running a hand through his hair, finding them softer than you had imagined. You laughed in disbelief and knelt down to kiss his forehead- you didn’t have to kneel down much thanks to him being so tall. You joined your foreheads and just let that moment sink in, waiting for him to do something but it was as if he had completely submitted himself to you.
“Yunho,” you breathed, “Won’t you kiss me?”
All Yunho wanted was to obey. He tilted his head, your lips brushing and then he brought his hands to your bare knees, sending shivers through your entire being. While he caressed the skin, he pecked your lips cautiously and you almost cried at how hesitant he was. You took it upon yourself to lock your lips with his and that was all he needed to kiss you back, immediately taking lead and kissing you almost desperately as if he had waited a lifetime for this moment. You moved your lips along his, settling in a comfortable rhythm and you realised you quite liked the position-
But Yunho had other plans. He broke apart, gripping your legs in one arm and getting up, making you latch on to him with a squeal which earned a laugh from him as he settled you on the empty kitchen counter, now able to meet your eyes better. He stared at you intently for a few moments, his arms caging you between them and brought your arms to rest on his shoulders, linking them around his neck.
“I’d say something about how it took you way too long,” you kissed the tip of his nose. “But I’m afraid you’ll think I’ve always fantasised about this and leave me here and go in your cave.”
“Never again,” he promised, capturing your lips in a slow and gentle kiss. You had all the time in the world now and a morbid part of your mind wanted to thank Detective Seo for paying a visit tonight even though you despised him. Yunho swiped his tongue across your lips and you gladly opened up for him, the kiss getting heated as his tongue explored your mouth, clashing with your tongue. You couldn’t help but marvel how you both fit with each other so well. 
You didn’t know how long you made out like that. Neither did you care, but naturally, you both broke apart and shared a giggle. He opened his arms for you and you gladly hugged him- his hugs were probably your most favourite thing about life now. He laughed at how you wrapped yourself around him like a cat so that he didn’t even have to hold you, simply wrap his arms around your back as he walked to the living room but you muttered ‘my room’ and he obeyed, walking in that direction-
And halting.
“What do you want me to do? Throw you in the pool of books and make out? Might hurt a little…”
“Oh, goodness,” you twisted in his arms to see the mess that your room was in right now. “I was sorting out books because I really have no space anymore and I was going to give away some tonight-”
“But you could put them in the living room? The shelves have some space?”
You hadn’t even considered that. You looked at him. “Can I use that space?”
“I mean… you’ve taken over the whole floor anyway,” he shrugged. “What harm a few books are gonna do?”
You smacked his arm and he laughed, putting you down on the floor. “Well, I should clean my mess then. Don’t want you complaining about how unruly your housemate is.”
“I’ll help,” he insisted and you scoffed.
“There’s no space for you to set a foot-”
“Then make some.”
“Oh?” You shot him a dirty look. “No plans to leave?”
“Do you want me to leave?” He asked cockily and you shook your head, immediately shoving a few books away and making space on the rug where he settled down and pulled you down in his lap, snuggling his face in your neck.
“Tell me about these books,” he muttered, his breath caressing your neck and before you could comment on the position, he kissed your neck lazily.
Well… perhaps it was better to shut up and obey.
“They are a part of me,” you smiled, picking the nearest one and reading the title while he continued kissing and sucking at your neck. “This one I read recently. I think you’ll like it- it’s about doctors- ah.”
Yunho smiled against your neck when you squirmed in his grasp. He had been teasing your sweet spot for far too long now and finally got to hear your pretty moan. “Really? What’s it about?”
“Doctors,” you muttered, tilting your neck and he dived back in. “And the problems they face, the power dynamics- Jeong Yunho, I swear to god-”
Yunho laughed deeply against your skin, drawing away to observe the reddening spot. You tried shifting in his grasp but he held you in your position. “Tell me about another book.”
“Yeah?” You scoffed when he started peppering kisses along your shoulders. “What if I just smack you on the head with one?”
“Tsk, tsk. Already?”
You shifted in his lap successfully this time and before you could yell at him, he was kissing you on the lips again and as you melted in his hold, you tossed the book in your hand away to cup his face.
Sorting the books and cleaning the mess could definitely wait.
—-----------------------------
Though you and Yunho had crossed some obvious boundaries now, you were unsure how that would affect the rules of living in his house. You weren’t only his housemate now, so perhaps, the rules could change? 
You started wondering about that after a few days. You hadn’t made anything official yet- he was still working a lot and barely had any time for himself but whenever he got home, he would find you and wrap you in his arms while he asked you about your day. When you asked him the same, he would simply smile and say something like ‘just the usual’ or ‘busy day today’.
Nothing more. He probably recognised the look in your eyes- the look that said that you wanted more. Perhaps he ignored it on purpose. Perhaps, whenever he kissed you after, it was to make up for the lack of an answer.
If you thought about it objectively… you didn’t really mind. Work is work- what could doctors really share about their work? But you knew he wasn’t simply going to work, especially when  he sometimes came home looking like he had been running for miles or with blood on his clothes. Surely, doctors wore a gown or something while operating or handling patients. His lab coat never had blood on it, so why would he have blood on his clothes and why would he sometimes look like he got in a fight? He could definitely feel your apprehension even though you pretended to be okay about it. 
Perhaps, he liked you because you didn’t ask. That didn’t mean you weren’t curious- now more so than ever. It wasn’t like being whatever you were to him now gave you any right to probe, but you couldn’t help pay a visit to his clinic tonight and see if he was really working a night shift- he had gone out in a rush earlier muttering something about an emergency. You only went to make sure he was okay, was what you told yourself-
It was certainly not because of your growing suspicion of what he really did. Nor was it because you wanted to double-check how Detective Seo told you that Yunho’s clinic had separate staff for night shifts and he definitely didn’t need to be present every night. It definitely wasn’t because Yeosang slipped when he accidentally told you Yunho had no shift a few nights ago when Yunho himself had told you he had one. And it definitely was not how you suddenly realised one day while writing your novel that Yunho’s answers to your odd questions were a bit too specific- like when you asked him about being stabbed in a certain location with a certain weapon and he slept on it and had a rather specific answer the next day. His answers were always a bit too detailed.
You would have ignored all of it but you found yourself inside the clinic and learned from the kind lady at the reception who thought it was cute that you came to check on him that Yunho only had one night shift a week. But according to what he told you, he had night shifts five days a week. 
Just what was he doing?
You absently walked home and instead of writing, you just mindlessly cleaned the nooks and crannies in the living room, your mind too numb to think of possibilities. Perhaps, you needed to start defining things with Yunho- beginning with what your relationship was, exactly, and if it was more than housemates you both definitely needed to talk about a few things-
When you heard the door unlock, you looked at the time- it was almost 4 in the morning. You hadn’t realised how quickly time passed. Yunho entered, looking pretty much the same as he did when he left. You managed a smile and he told you he would be right back, rushing upstairs. You went to wash your hands in the meantime, wondering if you should ask him- would he be angry to learn you went out looking for him? Would he appreciate your concern, or would he shut himself away like he has always done-
“Y/n?” Yunho’s voice brought you back to your senses and you realised you had been zoning out in front of the sink, the tap still running water. “You okay?”
“Yeah, just tired,” you told him, drying your hands and going towards the kitchen to get yourself water. You needed to get a grip.
“You don’t look okay,” Yunho’s brows were furrowed in concern. “Did something happen while I was away?”
“I promise I’m fine,” you said, though you were sure your smile was still unconvincing- or maybe Yunho was just too good at looking right through you. “How was your night shift? Did you get a lot of patients tonight?”
“It was okay,” Yunho exhaled deeply. “A few. Not too busy.”
You nodded slowly. For a moment, you wondered if he was doing night shifts in a different workplace. Perhaps, he had never lied and you just hadn’t figured out that he had jobs at two different places-
“You’re staring,” Yunho commented, tilting his head in thought. You broke eye contact, scanning his clothes- as neat as when he left for ‘work’. “You didn’t meet Detective Seo, did you?”
“No, why?”
“That’s the only time I’ve seen you look like this. Come on, you’re making me worried,” Yunho took a step closer, tucking your hair behind your ear. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s stupid,” you laughed, deciding to tackle at least one thing tonight. “You’ll make fun of me or you'll shut yourself in your cave.”
“You need to stop calling it a cave,” Yunho laughed a bit.
“Until I see it, it’s a cave to me,” you shrugged. “Who knows what you do there?”
“You want to see it?” He asked, absently caressing your cheekbone and your eyes widened.
“That… is not what I meant- I’m curious, yes, but I don’t want to invite myself up there.”
“Well,” Yunho put his hands on your shoulders. “It looks horrible right now- it’s messy and if I bring you upstairs, you’ll forget you’re tired and start cleaning the mess. Some other day?”
“Whenever is okay, it’s probably boring and plain,” you said dismissively and he nodded in satisfaction. 
“Then what is really weighing on your mind?”
“Shit, I thought you forgot about it,” you muttered but he wasn’t going to let you go. His grip on your shoulders tightened a fraction. “Look, I’m not trying to be that person and I really, really don’t mind how we are and what we are-”
“Get to the point-”
“What are we?” 
Yunho blinked. “Sorry, what?”
“What are we?” You sighed. “I love what we are. I don’t mind it one bit, but I feel like we’re still housemates and there’s still this wall between us and if that’s how things should be… I can work with that. I just… I wish there wasn’t such ambiguity- stop grinning like an idiot, will you?”
“Well,” Yunho stifled another grin. “What do you think we are?”
“I don’t know,” you pouted. “That’s what I’m asking.”
“I don’t know,” Yunho shrugged, straightening and bringing you closer so you were almost flush against him. “I don’t think we’d be doing this if we were ‘just housemates’.”
“My point exactly,” you muttered. “I’m confused. What rules still apply? Can I interfere in your personal life? Can I ask you more than I should? There’s still so much I don’t know about you and sometimes I feel like you’re miles away, Yunho.”
Yunho’s heart ached- he wanted nothing more than to bare his entire soul in front of you. He had considered that seriously over the past few days. He was pretty sure if anyone in this world would understand his reasons for what he did and still want to be with him, it would be you, but what if he was wrong about you? What if he had signed himself to an inevitable heartbreak? If so, how could he ever recover?
“I’m right here,” Yunho kissed your forehead. “You can ask me anything but can I answer at my pace?”
That was enough. You nodded and he smiled, pecking your lips. “Thank you.”
“I’ll wait for you,” you told him. “And I know you’re curious about a few things too- you can ask me anything and I’ll answer at my own pace. Okay?”
Yunho couldn’t help it- he cupped your face and kissed you, wondering how you were so perfect. How could you trust him like this? He sometimes wondered if he was dreaming- there was no way you were real. And he told you that every day, just like he did now, and just like always, you smacked his arm as you blushed.
“You should tell me something else- I’m kind of tired of hearing that,” you laughed. 
“Nothing else makes you laugh like this,” Yunho kissed you again, lingering. “You know I love it when you laugh.”
You kissed him back, forgetting all your worries and you felt the exhaustion wash away from your bones as he bent down to pick you up so he could kiss you better. You wrapped your arms around his neck and let him take you to the living room- to the couch which was probably your favourite place in this house now, where Yunho and you would spend hours with each other.
As he settled you down on the couch, he broke apart and locked eyes with you. “Well, do you still think we’re just housemates?”
“God, you really got stuck on that one, huh?” You poked his chest. “Okay. You’re what? My boyfriend?”
Yunho’s lips parted and a smile crawled on his lips. “I kind of like the sound of that.”
“Geez, have you never been in a relationship,” you teased and he laughed out loud. 
“Just not like this one, no,” he traced your lips with his thumb. “You’re… different.”
“Bet you told that to everyone before me,” you scoffed and he pecked your lips to shut you up. You smiled into the kiss, your hands wandering down his chest and stopping at his hips, snaking up his shirt on his bare skin which earned a light groan from him. You instinctively squeezed his side-
And he stopped kissing you right then. You wondered if you had done something wrong and when you drew apart, you realised he looked as if he was in pain. You frowned, your hands still there while Yunho stifled another groan and when you pressed on both his sides, he finally exhaled-
“You’re hurt, aren’t you?” You whispered, drawing his shirt up without permission and gasping when you saw a big red bruise on his right side as if he had been punched.
“Y/n,” Yunho called in warning but you weren’t having any of it anymore- you pulled his shirt up and if Yunho hadn’t been bracing himself up on either sides of you to keep himself from falling on top of you, he would have stopped you, but now you were staring at his upper body in horror and worry.
You let go of the shirt and it fell down to cover his secrets. You looked at Yunho who couldn’t meet your eyes. “Won’t you let me help you? Won’t you let me take care of you?”
Yunho simply sighed, wondering what to do, what to say. He knew this day would come eventually but he hadn’t imagined it to be like this. He let you gently push him back on the couch and without a word, you went to your room. He slumped down, rubbing his face-
Of all the days, it had to be today. Had to be tonight when he made a mistake and hurt himself. You reappeared out of your room with a medical kit and settled down next to him.
“You’re the doctor, Yunho,” you said and showed him the ointments and medicines in the kit, noticing a number of scars on his body and finally getting a good look at the scar that ran up his arm all the way to the middle of his upper arm. “Tell me how to take care of you.”
Yunho passed you a look, finding the lack of expressions on your face kind of disturbing. Just what were you thinking? He sighed and took out the ointment for the bruise- one he had in his room as well and would have used had he not been distracted by you. You nodded and took the ointment, spreading it along his bruise and gently rubbing it in. Once done, you got up and inspected the rest of his upper body.
“Are you sure that’s the only place you’re hurt?” 
“Yep,” he assured you. “You can relax now.”
You scoffed at that, putting the kit aside and folding your arms as you looked at him. “Look… If you don’t want me to, I won’t ask, but you’re not just a doctor. I’m right about that, aren’t I?”
When he didn’t respond, you understood. You were right, and he probably couldn’t say anything. “Do you trust me, Yunho?”
“Y/n, it’s not about trust-”
“Just tell me- do you trust me?”
He locked eyes with you. “Of course I do. If I didn’t… I would have kicked you out long ago, y/n, and I would have never....”
That seemed to satisfy you and when he found the faintest hint of a smile on your lips, he finally relaxed a bit. “I trust you, but there are things I cannot tell you- not right now.”
“I know,” you nodded. “You can stop lying about your night shifts- just say you’re going somewhere. I won’t ask until you tell me.”
Yunho blinked in surprise- just how long ago had you figured him out?
“Also… I would appreciate it if the next time you get hurt, you let me know instead of surprising me like this.”
“Do you… know something you’re not telling me, y/n?”
You smiled at Yunho. If he wasn’t so genuine with his words and his feelings, you would have demanded answers, but what you had with him was special in its own way. No questions asked wasn’t such a bad rule- because you knew that when he answered your questions, you would have to answer his too.
“Do I? I don’t know,” you shrugged. “But I have a feeling that you and I aren’t so different, Yunho.”
Yunho wished he could tell you who he was- his friends insisted he was not a ‘murderer’ like he would often call himself but a vigilante. A hero to most, an enemy to the others- especially the police who had been on his tail for a while now. How could you possibly be the same as him? He had killed people with his own hands, and though it could be argued that he only killed the worst of criminals, if Hongjoong hadn’t been there the night his parents were killed, he could very well be in prison for attempted murder or worse. 
All these years, as he killed one corrupted individual after another, he was convinced that he was the one who was truly corrupted inside. He was the one who needed to meet the fate that anyone who encountered him did. His friends, especially Hongjoong, were aware that there was a twisted part inside him that took joy in the simple act of killing people- people who stole from others. Stole their loved ones, their life, their hard work. You couldn’t possibly be as bad as him, could you? There was absolutely no way-
“Stop thinking so much,” you whispered, placing your hand on his and he immediately shifted so he was holding your hand, squeezing it as if he needed some assurance. “I just want you to be careful, okay? Whatever you do… stay safe, will you?”
“How can you trust me so blindly?” Yunho asked. 
“I told you, right?” You smiled. “I know who you are- at least to me. That’s enough for me.”
Yunho smiled back, burying his face in the crook of your neck and you wrapped your arm around his bare shoulders, burying your hand in his hair and caressing them gently. You let go of Yunho’s hand only to trace the long scar on his arm, wishing you could ask how he got it but you would wait. You kissed his temple and he sighed, nuzzling against you. 
“I’m afraid…” Yunho confessed in a voice so small you were wondering if you were hearing things. “I’m afraid you’ll run away when you learn who I am.”
Your heart sank at his words. He was just like you. In all your previous relationships, you made people run away from you. You could never give them what you wanted. They would find you too secretive or too accepting. Little did they know that you were only hiding your ugly past and trying your best not to let it interfere with your life. 
“You couldn’t possibly be worse than me,” you told him and that prompted him to lift his head to look at you. “I’m convinced I’m a monster. Could you love a monster, Yunho?”
Yunho took in your blank gaze as you said those words and he realised that perhaps, you were right. Perhaps, you were just like him too, with some twisted part inside you, something that had you convinced that you were a monster. 
And if that was the case… he could love you. He wanted nothing more than to love you and tell you that you made him feel human even at his worst, so he leaned forward to kiss you slowly, letting you know what he felt through the way he held your waist and brought you on top of him, through the way he held you so close to him and sighed when you wrapped your arms around his, through the way he started trailing kisses everywhere on your skin. And when you gave him more, he accepted it. If that was the last time you would ever look at him and not feel horrified, he was going to make sure he made you feel loved so he forgot about all his worries and smiled at you playfully, beyond relieved when you bit your lips in excitement.
“You’re going to be the death of me,” Yunho whispered, sucking at your neck- he had a thing for that certain spot, you had realised now.
“We haven’t even begun, though,” you commented and Yunho paused, considering your words. He experimentally snaked his hand up your thigh and when you only kissed his temple in response, he understood.
An invitation.
“Shall we take this to bed, then?”
You nodded, sharing an open-mouthed kiss before he got up and started going towards your room.
If only he knew that your invitation was for the same reasons as his.
—---------------------------
For all your talk about trust, you sure were walking on the fine line that marked trust from betrayal. 
And if things hadn’t turned out the way they had been turning out for the past two weeks, you would have never been here. You scoffed internally as you took another turn into a dark alley, a safe distance behind Yunho so he wouldn’t notice your presence- anything to convince yourself that you were only doing this to make sure he would be safe. To make sure he wouldn’t hurt himself again-
Because you had a gut feeling that something was going to happen tonight, and your gut was never, ever wrong. Your gut had saved (or doomed, it could be argued) you two decades ago. You could trust yourself with that.
Though, again, that was debatable as well. Was it your gut that had you all nervous and hypervigilant or was it the growing suspicions about Yunho?
Because a few days ago, Detective Seo called you and requested that you visit the station. You would have ignored him had he not been so polite for once. Ultimately, the reason you visited him was because you wanted to clear his suspicions of you and get him off your tail- you had finally settled in this town at peace and you couldn’t have the detective ruining that. 
And also, a small part of you wanted to learn more about why he suspected Yunho. 
You discovered during your visit that you were right- your involvement in his investigation of Yunho made him suspicious of you. You learned that the reason he was so intent on having Yunho come to the station and give a proper statement was because a few of his alibis no longer held any validity- he had said something about a night shift when he had none. The detective didn’t like how the doctors and a few of the staff members around him were so uncooperative and secretive. If that wasn’t enough, the detective was still curious about the 12-inch knife in your kitchen. 
He joked about how he or his colleagues didn’t own a 12-inch meat knife at home- apparently a non-professional one was usually 7 to 10 inches long. You told him that it was irrelevant but when he mentioned how his suspect had stopped using kitchen knives a few months ago and switched to a dagger of a unique built, it had you wondering-
The detective didn’t know those knives actually belonged to Yunho, which was why he was also suspecting you now. What if you told him? What if the timing of the change of the murder weapon matched?
You only asked the detective if he really believed you were capable of wielding daggers and he shook his head in denial. You then asked if he really thought the surgeon could be a suspect in his case.
“I can’t tell you what it is, but we have substantial evidence to keep an eye on him, at least. If it’s him, he’s not alone.”
And that’s what got you thinking if you were wrong about who Yunho and his friends were. Especially when only a couple days later you went to visit them at the clinic with some fresh cookies and you got a peek at the register at reception that had a schedule of all doctors and you learned that Yunho had no night shift for the rest of the week-
Only to find him lying about it and hearing the news about the murder of a renowned politician while he was god knows where.
You didn’t ask Yunho why he lied about the night shift because he had agreed not to make up that excuse again. You casually confirmed with Wooyoung if he had really been at the clinic that night and he told you he had, but you weren’t done there. You double-checked with the young girl at reception in the clinic- she was quite a fan of your cookies and now that she knew you and Yunho were close, she willingly confirmed that Yunho had indeed not been at the clinic that night. Neither had any of his friends. 
You wished you could simply confront Yunho and ask but he was still hesitant. And really, you would have let everything be. You would have waited for him, but tonight? 
Tonight he told you he was going to the clinic to meet up with Wooyoung and give him some company during his boring night shift. Pretty believable, but your gut twisted as soon as he stepped out and you knew that you just had to make sure that he was going to the clinic. You covered yourself with a jacket and scarf, grabbed the keys and wore your shoes-
Changing your mind and going to the kitchen to grab a little something before finally stepping out. 
And that’s how you got here, one bus ride and a good walk later, deep in some abandoned part of the town following Yunho through the alleys until he stopped abruptly, making you take a few steps back and hide yourself in a corner. Strangely, Yunho seemed to be inspecting the area. What for, you didn’t know. He looked around and checked if the gate at the end of the alley was really locked. After thorough inspection which made you wonder if he was looking for someone or something, he started walking in your direction, probably to leave. You discreetly slid down and away so he would cross you without looking in your direction, and thankfully, he did. 
You sighed, wondering if tonight had been a waste in which case your guilty conscience wouldn’t let you sleep for a good few days unless you came clean to Yunho. You were just following him back because you were pretty sure you would get lost otherwise when you spotted another man at the opposite end of the street. Instinctively, you hid again and waited for the man to continue along that street and get out of your way-
Except he turned in the street in Yunho’s direction.
You made a face and decided to fall behind the two- surely the man would be on his own way soon, except there was something odd about the way he was walking-
He was walking just like you had been- short, quick and silent steps, a good distance behind Yunho to avoid encountering him. Was he following Yunho too? How did he know Yunho would be here? Had he seen you- did he know you were here? It was too dark to make out who he was.
The two turned to another street and the man kept following him even after the crossroads, confirming your suspicions that Yunho was being followed. Perhaps, Yunho had been waiting for this man when he had been looking around the alley-
A sharp glint near the man’s thigh caught your attention and with a sinking heart, you realised-
The man was wielding a weapon. Something sharp that looked an awful lot like the very knife you had hidden inside your jacket.
You froze for a few moments that you knew would cost you something. There was just too much to consider- the feeling of impending doom, the worry for Yunho’s life, the fight-or-flight response making its way to control your future actions and worst of all, the feeling that you were back where you had been when you were still a child trying to protect your father from a situation just like this.
And as the man’s pace quickened and the distance between him and Yunho got shorter, you let the child that had murdered a grown man to protect a loved one take over. Just like that night, you raised your knife in the air without realising when you actually took it out of your jacket. And just like that time, you found yourself running towards the man- this time, experienced and calculating. You would have to congratulate yourself for being so certain about what you were doing-
“Yunho, watch out!”
Though Yunho recognised your voice immediately, the fear in your voice was unfamiliar and he turned around with dread pooling in his nerves, his eyes widening as he tried to process an unfamiliar face of a man with a weapon aimed at him- way too close- and then your figure, perhaps as unfamiliar this time, running towards the man. Yunho instinctively dodged the attack and before he could react further, you collided with the man, crashing on the floor with grunts.
Every nerve in your body screamed as you both clawed at each other while trying not to hurt yourselves, getting nicked here and there and before the man could actually think and overpower you, you buried the length of your knife between his collarbones, effectively disarming him and the man’s eyes widened as he whimpered in pain-
No.
“Y/n,” Yunho almost cried as he sank down next to you, spotting the horror in your eyes and in that moment, he knew only one thing- that he couldn’t let you burden yourself with having to live with blood on your hands. He inspected the stab on the man’s neck, sucking in his breath when he realised the knife in your hand was from your kitchen- the same damned knife he had spilled blood with. The man coughed blood and your grip on the knife finally loosened as you realised just what you had done. 
While you remained frozen in your spot, Yunho realised that the man was beyond help though with the current position of the knife in his throat, he was going to bleed to death for a long while before he could let go. So Yunho made a decision and gently unwrapped your hands from the knife, squeezing them to make you look at him.
“Y/n? Are you with me?”
His voice felt miles away, drowned by the ringing in your ears and you could only blink. Yunho took a deep, shaky breath. “Do you trust me?”
You didn’t know how long you stared at him but he gently shook your shoulder, making you crawl away from the shivering body of the man. “Y/n, do you trust me?”
This time, you did hear him and you nodded slowly, still in a trance. “Yunho- save him, please-”
Yunho had his answer. He slid the knife out of the spot between his collarbones only to stab him on another spot in his neck not far from the original and you watched in horror as the man groaned once before falling limp. Yunho put a hand over the wounds as if that could possibly stop the bleeding and then he asked you to take off your scarf. You weren’t sure you heard him right but with his free hand he started to unwind the scarf from around your neck. You didn’t make any effort to help him- you simply watched him wrap your scarf around his neck to stop further bleeding-
“He’s dead,” you practically spat out. “Why do you need to stop the bleeding now?”
Yunho didn’t answer. Once his hands were free, he bent down to pick the man and started walking back to the alley, stopping when he realised you weren’t following him. He turned to look at you, eyes void of emotions. “Aren’t you going to come?”
You got up with immense struggle, looking around- why was there no one to help? Why was this abandoned area so empty in the middle of the night? You grabbed the man’s knife and started following Yunho, your hands and legs shaking uncontrollably and each step got harder to take. When you reached the spot Yunho had checked out earlier, he laid the man’s body down and you finally sank to the floor, drawing your knees to your chest and trying to breathe. You could hear him talking into the phone to someone, giving them the address. 
All you knew was that you had killed someone. Again. And this time, your father wasn’t there to protect you and take the blame. This time, you weren’t a child who needed such protection. You were an adult and you had killed-
You felt arms wrap around your figure and you finally let out a shaky sob though your eyes remained dry. Yunho rubbed your back and asked you to breathe with him, drawing away and rubbing your cold hands in his to share some warmth- though his were just as cold. You could only see the blood on your hands, on your clothes-
“Y/n, listen to me carefully,” his deep voice echoed inside you. “You didn’t kill the man, okay?”
“You’re lying,” your teeth were chattering with cold and fear now. “I killed him.”
“No,” Yunho shook his head. “You protected me. I killed him.”
“You can’t do this to me, not you too,” you finally cried. “Not you too. I killed again, and this time, I’ll take responsibility.”
Yunho took a moment to process what you had said as he scanned your figure- everything finally started to make sense though there was still so much he needed answers to. “Listen to me. You didn’t deliver the killing blow. I did. I’m the one who killed him.”
“You and I both know he would have died anyway,” you locked eyes with him and Yunho knew then that it was no use trying to convince you that you weren’t to blame. “You just made it easier for him.”
Yunho didn’t respond to that. He simply kept rubbing your hands as if that could turn back time and make things right. When you heard the sound of footsteps, you got tense and almost panicked but Yunho assured you it was just his friends and everything would be okay soon. You watched Wooyoung and Mingi assess the situation, not reacting much and numbly, you let Wooyoung accompany you to his car. You kept looking for Yunho though and Wooyoung smiled a bit despite the situation, assuring you that he would be right there. 
While on your way, Wooyoung made sure you were warm and made you eat a few bites of chocolate, telling you you would need it. You asked him how he was so calm right now- was it not his first time that something like this happened? 
“Something tells me it’s not your first time either, y/n,” he simply responded and you fell silent after that. 
You shut your eyes and let your mind wander about what was going to happen next. Sure, you felt a sense of security being around Yunho- he had done something you could never have imagined- but there was still a small part of you thinking about how this was the end for you. You were going to go to prison. Perhaps you would meet the same fate as your father. Your mother and brother would certainly be pleased to see you behind bars. You could hear their laughter and the ‘I told you so’ even now-
“Y/n?” Yunho’s gentle voice made you open your eyes. “We’re here.”
You looked at ‘here’ which was another abandoned area with dimly lit streets and a warehouse which Hongjoong was unlocking the doors of. Yunho helped you out of the car- you definitely needed that since your legs were still wobbly. You noticed that not everyone made it back and you asked him where they were.
“They’re taking a detour- they’ll be here in a few minutes.”
You nodded and followed him inside and if the circumstances would have been different, you could have appreciated how well organised the inside of the warehouse was, looking like a home with couches and games and fridge and enough space to do anything and everything. It looked like a hideout and you smiled faintly before sitting on the couch. Hongjoong brought you beer and you gladly accepted, taking a few gulps and letting Wooyoung wrap a blanket around you, letting Yunho clean the blood off your hands and spotting the cuts littering your hands and arms. Now that there was enough light, he could spot the numbness in your eyes.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, suddenly breaking out of your trance. “Are you? Did he hurt you?”
“I’m okay,” he breathed. “Do you need anything?”
“No, I’m good, I…” you looked at your scarred hands. “I’m… okay.”
“Y/n,” Yunho took your hands in his again and you met his worried eyes. “How did you know? Why did you follow me?”
“I… I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry,” you sighed and he squeezed your hands. “I’m sorry-”
“It’s alright, but I need to know what happened tonight so I can help you, okay?” Yunho said and you nodded, straightening. 
“I knew you had no night shift today- I saw in the register by chance,” you told him and he nodded. “So when you said you were going, I knew you were lying. I would have let you go, trust me, but… I had a feeling something was about to happen. Or maybe… maybe I was just too suspicious- because Detective Seo said if it was you, you weren’t alone-”
“You met Detective Seo again?” He asked, his tone still gentle but you spotted Seonghwa looking at you apprehensively. “Why?”
“He called me to the station a few days ago because he was suspicious of me- the knives,” you let out a nervous laugh and Yunho nodded, understanding. “He told me his suspect’s murder weapon and method had changed and the timing was just a bit off. He knew it couldn’t be me but we have history so he just needed to make sure.”
“Did you tell him about Yunho- or anything?” Seonghwa asked.
Yunho gently warned Seonghwa but you told him it was okay. “He doesn’t know the knives belong to Yunho and he is just suspecting him because apparently your alibis are invalid now. That’s all he’s got on you, actually.”
They all sighed in relief and you heard the doors open, the rest of them joining you and exchanging drinks. “You’re all oddly calm about all of this.”
“We’re doctors,” Yeosang commented. “We have to be calm at times like this.”
“You’re oddly calm too,” San noticed.
“That’s what I said,” Wooyoung quipped in and Yunho asked you if the boys were overwhelming you but you shook your head no. 
“Can you tell me what happened next? Why did you follow me?”
You took a deep breath. “I said Detective Seo and I have history. When I was little… about two decades ago, I… we lived in a small town, the four of us. My father was in debt and he often had to run away from gangsters and loan sharks. One day, he got cornered by one of the men and he had a gun- he looked like he was about to shoot my dad. My mom was protecting us- me and my brother, but I… I did what I could to protect him. I went to the kitchen, grabbed the first knife I saw and stabbed that man multiple times in the back.”
“Oh, y/n,” Yunho’s voice sounded pained and you heard a chorus of sucked breaths and exhales. Your hands started trembling again and Yunho squeezed them, planting a kiss to your knuckles which just made tears pool in your eyes. 
“I did that to protect him,” your voice was just as shaky as your hands now. “That man died and my father ended up taking all the blame to protect me from the police. Detective Seo was in charge of that case and he always suspected me- especially because my mother and brother started hating me for putting my dad in such a situation. He found all of it odd. So tonight… I had a feeling just like that night- like something bad was about to happen. Or maybe I’m just making up that excuse to cover the fact that I betrayed your trust and followed you to see just what you were up to-”
“No,” Yunho embraced you, planting a kiss on top of your head. “Even if you followed me because you were suspicious, you were right to do so. I shouldn’t have lied about the night shift- anyone would have suspected me after that. It just slipped- it’s my fault.”
“It’s not,” you wiped your eyes, drawing away. “I shouldn’t have followed you-”
“You saved me,” Yunho smiled at you. “Your gut feeling, your suspicions… they were right. If it weren’t for you-”
“But I killed him,” you cried. “You cannot take the blame for it now.”
Seonghwa cleared his throat. “We’ve uh… identified the man. Yunho, you might want to tell her who you really are.”
Yunho nodded, wiping your tears away. “Do you want to stay here? Or do you want to go home?”
“I think I’d like to go home… if that’s alright with you guys,” you said and the boys assured you that it was. Yunho got up and took the car keys from Seonghwa, sharing a few words with him and Wooyoung and Mingi asked you if you needed anything. You told them you were fine but you would like to be in the comfort of your own home right now and they understood.
“If Yunho bothers you too much, you can call us,” Mingi teased. “We’ll take care of him.”
“I think it’s the other way round, but thank you,” you finally laughed. “Can I ask- what will happen to that man? The body…”
“Yunho will let you know- you don’t have to worry about anything,” Wooyoung assured you and when Yunho extended his hand, you took a deep breath and took it.
You were going home, and you were finally going to learn who Yunho was.
—--------------------------
It was surreal to enter your home now, Yunho by your side and the weight of the events from the past few hours hanging over your shoulders. You both went to change first and you found yourself unable to look at your reflection in the mirror as you washed your face and hands. You took a few deep breaths to calm down, as best as you could manage in that moment before leaving and finding the smell of chamomile tea in the living room. Yunho motioned for you to join him on the couch and you passed a tight-lipped smile before obeying. You sipped the tea and waited for Yunho to gather his thoughts.
“When I was in high school,” Yunho finally began and you shifted towards him to watch him. “One night, a serial killer decided my parents were his next victims. He followed my mom home and killed both of them, and I… I wasn’t home- by the time I came home, he was done killing them.”
“Oh, dear,” you held Yunho’s hand. You couldn’t imagine what he must have felt. 
“I saw him leaving,” Yunho sighed deeply. “Hongjoong was with me- he witnessed everything. He tried to stop me from going after the killer but I grabbed a metal rod and went after the man. He had a knife and that’s how I got this scar,” Yunho pointed at his arm. “Hongjoong saved me that night but I lost a part of me that night. A part that was human. I became almost animalistic, trying to find the killer.”
“Did you ever find him then?” You asked.
“I did, but after he died,” Yunho slumped back on the couch. “I couldn’t get my revenge. It wasn’t long after that incident. I lost my mind and was about to become the very killer I hated. Hongjoong saved me yet again- he knew that I wouldn’t stop at anything now. I was getting into a lot of fights and basically ruining my life.”
“How did he save you then?”
“He handed me a dagger and told me to do what I must with it,” Yunho admitted. “I was shocked because usually he was the one hiding anything that could become a weapon from me. But then I realised that I was only trying to protect innocent people like my parents. I would aimlessly walk the streets and help anyone who needed it.”
“That’s… very you,” you smiled and Yunho shook his head.
“I’m not a good person, though,” he said. “Somehow, we found each other, the eight of us. We select targets- corrupt politicians, rapists, offenders… especially the people who are public figures and lead double lives. We send hints to the police so they can do their job but when they don’t… we take the matter into our own hands.” 
“Oh,” you frowned. “The politician a few days ago-”
“Not me,” Yunho shook his head. “Though he was my next target.”
“So you… kill them?”
“We only kill when someone is powerful enough to get away with all their crimes,” Yunho admitted and your heart sank dangerously- hearing it from his own mouth now, it finally started to feel real. 
“Isn’t that… okay?” You wondered. “The police can’t do anything and they would only cause further harm if they are alive.”
“Yes, but…” Yunho tucked your hair behind your ear. “I shouldn’t enjoy it so much, should I? I think I’m twisted like that, y/n. I feel no remorse.”
You looked at him- how could you tell him that you understood? That you were okay with that? He would tell you over and over again that it was wrong, because he knew that too. You knew that too, yet… 
“It’s kind of ironic then, that you all are doctors, right?” You finally said and he coughed, making you laugh a little- more in disbelief than in amusement. “So all your night shifts…?”
“We meet up at the warehouse to plan and work on new cases,” Yunho said.
“And the man that I…”
“We identified him- the boys are digging up further but we’re suspecting he’s the copycat killer.”
“The copycat killer?” You repeated in disbelief. “Copying who- oh.”
Yunho pursed his lips guiltily. “Those kitchen knives… they were murder weapons. Now you know why I got so angry when you used them to cook.”
“Oh, goodness-”
“Don’t worry, I sanitised them,” he said as if that could make things better. “When I stopped using them, someone kept murdering people with similar weapons. And not just carefully selected scum- innocent people. It was why Detective Seo suspected me at first and then let me go easily because it just didn’t match. He probably figured out that someone is copying the real killer.”
You took a deep breath. “I killed… a serial killer?”
“Yes,” Yunho held your hands, making you face him. “Do you know how badly the events of tonight could have turned out?”
“But he was going to kill you,” you said. “He had it all planned- he was waiting for you, Yunho. You could have been seriously hurt tonight- do you realise that?”
“I can’t believe you’re still worried about me,” Yunho almost cried. “Do you have any idea what went through my head when I saw you throwing yourself in the way to protect me… I thought I was going to lose you, y/n. Why did you do that?”
“I can’t lose you,” you simply said. “It felt like I was back to being that kid trying to protect my father. Why did you kill him without knowing who he was? Why did you try to take the blame, Yunho? Do you know how scared I was when you did that?” 
When Yunho didn’t respond, his eyes tearing up, you continued. “I thought it was happening all over again. You would take the blame and I would have to live with the guilt. I’ve lived with guilt for far too long, Yunho. My father… he never made it out of prison. He was never a criminal and I guess the other prisoners found out, and they… they killed him. My mother and brother never forgave me after that. Do you think I could live with something like this again?”
Yunho wiped his eyes. “I understand, y/n, I really do,” he nodded. “But you have to understand that I was scared for you tonight. You shouldn’t have done any of that- the police will find the man’s body with all his crimes soon, but even if he was someone innocent, you shouldn’t have done that-”
“I did that to protect you,” you smiled. “What’s so hard to understand about that? Just like you delivered the killing blow to protect me, yeah? Why did you do that?”
“Because I love you,” Yunho breathed. “And I couldn’t bear to see that broken look in your eyes.”
“But we’re both broken in our own ways,” the tears finally rolled down your cheeks at his confession and he laughed a little, wiping them away as he cupped your face. “Is that why you’ve been so distant? So unapproachable? You thought you were broken and no one could love you?”
When Yunho nodded, you shook your head. “Well, I might be just like you then. And I love you for who you are. I love you for the way you tried to protect me, and I love you for still loving me when I told you who I am.”
Yunho finally relaxed and laughed, bringing you in for a hug and you got in his lap, wrapping your limbs around each other. You hugged him good and tight, telling him that he didn’t have to be so guarded anymore- he could be himself with you. He kissed you and told you that you could stop being so scared as well. You found yourself content in his embrace as you both shared your pasts and concerns, assuring each other that everything would be okay and helping each other process the events of tonight, Yunho treating the various places you got nicked and patching you up. You were still scared and anxious but he was there for you, holding you even as you fell asleep.
There was no place he would rather be anyway.
—----------------------------
“The snake in the suit was cornered now. With a grim realisation, he wondered if he should have listened to the lanky cop on his case that he couldn’t even bother to remember the name of– he probably meant well when he suggested the snake be careful now. What would the snake need to be afraid of? The snake was a predator. It only needed to worry about finding prey. 
However, the predator had become the prey now, defenceless in front of the masked spider who wielded his weapon of justice- a beautifully carved dagger with a golden hilt. For the first time in his life, the snake wished it had been a gun instead so his end would have been quick. However, just like the snake had enjoyed wearing the face of justice to the public while circulating drugs to the desperate, the spider enjoyed wearing no mask when he prosecuted his targets. The spider had one purpose to serve- so why not enjoy it?
The spider leaned into the snake’s ears, holding the tip of his dagger under the snake’s chin as he whispered, “I sent you countless warnings, didn’t I? I told you what fate you would meet if you continued down this road. Prison would have been a playground for you compared to the hell I’m about to show you.”
Any ramblings of mercy went up the spider’s head- he couldn’t hear anything anymore. With a kick to the snake’s stomach, he made him sink to his knees before he swiped the dagger along his cheekbone, producing a spurt of blood. The snake let out a choked whimper and the spider cocked his head, wondering which part of his body to ruin next– hey, y/n… I’m pretty sure it’s not that deep.”
“It’s fiction, Wooyoung,” you simply winked but Wooyoung wasn’t having any of it.
“Yunho, tell me, did you really cock your head and wonder which part of him you’d like to ruin next?”
Yunho only bothered shooting Wooyoung a dirty look in between arguing with San and Jongho about a recent case they had at their clinic- something about how to perform a specific type of stitch that would be seamless. 
“What do you think, Yeosang?” Wooyoung elbowed the man next to him. “Don’t you think she’s overdoing some of it?”
“Well, what do you want me to write? ‘Yunho went and killed the politician who had been circulating drugs all around the province’. Plain and simple like that?”
“I think she writes gore to cope,” Yeosang commented. “I’ve been seeing a pattern and- wait, was I not supposed to point that out?”
You looked at Mingi for help who looked moments away from bursting into laughter. “You might want to switch your psychiatrist, y/n.”
“I think I’m good with you,” you grimaced at Yeosang who looked like a deer caught in headlights. “This one should stick to the kidney stuff instead of treating the mind.”
“You heard her,” Mingi clapped, finally bursting out laughing. “Stick to being a nephrologist.”
“I don’t even know how people can have you as their psychiatrist,” Yeosang narrowed his eyes at Mingi and you shook your head in amusement- this banter wasn’t new. “What do you tell them? This too shall pass?”
Wooyoung snorted at that while Mingi raised his finger at him, trying to come up with a retort but failing and sulk-walking to Yunho, resting his head against his shoulder. You smiled at how Yunho naturally adjusted to have both of them in a comfortable position while continuing arguing with the Chois. 
It had been a couple of months since that fateful night. You were still trying to process most of what happened that night and the boys were always there to help you with that, going above and beyond. While at first you had been apprehensive of them- rightfully so- now they were almost like family to you. You found that all of them were extremely hardworking and ambitious, but also very gentle and kind. Or perhaps, you were receiving special treatment as Yunho often joked. 
Yunho gave you all the time and space you needed to sort your thoughts out while continuing being there for you- you were amazed at how good he was with that balance. He never let you feel overwhelmed or alone. He answered all of your questions about him and he just knew when you wanted to talk about your own feelings. He would ask you what you were afraid to find the answers to and then help you navigate through the tangled web that your thoughts were. When he suggested you go to Mingi for ‘therapy sessions’, you asked him if he genuinely thought you needed therapy and if Mingi was really the right person to go considering his role in what they did.
“I mean… Mingi is sort of my therapist too,” Yunho admitted to your surprise. “One thing about him is that he understands. No matter how sick or twisted you think you may be, he understands and he guides you to your own solution to that. Surprisingly, he’s the one who helped me overcome my rage and trauma of my parents, not Hongjoong.”
That really got you thinking and when you went to your appointment with Mingi in his clinic, he asked you what role you would like him to play- a stranger and just a therapist, or who he really was. You preferred the latter and soon, you found yourself looking forward to going to those sessions. You could now talk about what happened with your father without feeling an immense sense of guilt because even though all this time you knew it was not your fault, you simply hadn’t made peace with that. Mingi also helped you realise that what they did- the ‘vigilante’ stuff- it wasn’t lawful. It might even be wrong and you needed to acknowledge and remember that.
And you did. So when Seonghwa and Hongjoong came to you with an odd proposition, you took your time thinking about it. You spent a few days away from everything, back in your hometown to visit your mother and brother and this time, you could actually talk back to them when they mocked you about going to your father’s grave when, according to them, you were his murderer. That time away helped you sort through the final knots in your mind.
And when Yunho came back home that day to the smell of a freshly cooked meal in his house, he had to take a moment for himself. He spread his arms as soon as he saw you and you crushed him in a hug, giggling like kids. You were back in his arms and that was all that mattered to him. You informing him that you agreed to Hongjoong and Seonghwa’s proposition was a bonus.
“She’s a crime-gore fiction writer, Wooyoung,” Hongjoong finally said. “You can’t expect anything less from her. Besides, the details make it look less believable, which means less people will suspect that what she writes is not wholly fictional.”
“Exactly,” you nodded. “Good one by the way, Yeosang.”
“Yeah, I was going to say that,” Hongjoong laughed. “I once went to Mingi too. He told me that exact line and that’s when I decided I didn’t really need therapy.”
“Ah, I didn’t know that,” Yeosang laughed. “No wonder he’s sulking so much.”
“He’ll be fine,” Seonghwa chuckled and you didn’t miss the adoration in his eyes as he glanced at Mingi. Seonghwa turned to you, closing your book and placing it on the table in front of him. “I think you did a great job. It’s a very engaging story and the facts are present for the wise ones if they can connect the dots. I quite like it, y/n.”
“Thank you,” you smiled. “I owe it to you both. You’re really good editors- it’s too bad you both refuse to take credit.”
“It would only raise suspicion,” Hongjoong dismissed. “You’re the writer. We’re only, uh… inspirations?”
“Inspirations,” Wooyoung repeated. “I know exactly who would be pleased to hear that. Our favourite detective.”
“I heard from a source that he spent two hours trying to convince his coworkers that what you were writing wasn’t fiction,” Hongjoong scoffed. “He’s been quite silent lately.”
“The excitement must have dulled now- it’s been weeks since this book has been out,” you said. “I think he might be starting to take pointers now. He texted me a few days ago asking which politician he should keep an eye out for next.”
“What did you say?” Yeosang asked.
“I told him the next book could be about a detective who refuses to leave a poor girl alone,” you grinned, the group bursting into a chorus of laughter. “He enjoyed that joke, actually. I think he’s warming up to me now.”
“He better not,” Yunho finally joined, putting his hands on your shoulders from behind you. “I don’t want him obsessing about what kitchen tools we use these days. Shall we go home now?”
You nodded, saying goodnight to the boys and exiting the warehouse with Yunho. A bike ride later in the chilly night, you were home and just like always, grinning as you entered- you still loved the bike rides.
“Oh, tomorrow’s Sunday,” you clapped, suddenly remembering. “We get to sleep in. What do you wanna do tonight? Movie?”
“Hmm, let’s see,” Yunho pretended to think, a grin creeping up on his face as he tackled you in a back hug and swung you around once, making your laugh echo in the house. “I think I’ll skip.”
“What’s got you so mushy tonight?” You asked- Yunho was swinging you both back and forth, his cheek resting against yours.
“Nothing,” he muttered. “I just still can’t get used to the fact that you’re real.”
You chuckled at that- you knew that Yunho absolutely loved the sight of you getting along with his friends, working with them, and actually supporting them. You insisted it was because the world really needed less criminals prowling around and while Yunho agreed, he also knew that part of the reason you agreed in the first place was because of him and he told you that he sometimes couldn’t believe that you could love him despite what he did.
You only told him once that a sick part of you definitely enjoyed killing those men if that meant you got to protect your loved ones. He remembered what you said- that everyone had something ugly like that in them- they just hadn’t been desperate enough to realise it yet. And thanks to you, Yunho was discovering a new side of himself- someone passionate and gentle and human. Sure, he had been that with his friends before, but with you, it was definitely different and new.
“Says the 6 foot tall handsome doctor slash biker slash vigilante. It can’t get hotter than that,” you teased. 
“Bet you moved in because of that.”
“Maybe I did,” you teased. “Wasn’t it the best decision you made, agreeing to let me move in?”
Yunho thought about it for a few moments, humming to himself. “I could think of a few better decisions I’ve made-”
You smacked his arm, getting out of his grasp and muttering you were going to bed first and Yunho laughed loudly at your antics, following you as you walked towards the stairs and when you noticed him, you sped up, giggling when he started running after you. You barely made it to his room when he had you in his arms again and was peppering kisses all over your face.
“You didn’t let me finish,” he said. “The best decision I made was probably letting Detective  Seo rattle you out while I stood outside and listened.”
You gasped loudly. “You did all of that just to have an excuse to kiss me, didn’t you?”
“Who knows?” Yunho shrugged teasingly. “Might not have gotten a better chance.”
“Come on, say it,” you started unbuttoning his shirt. “When exactly did you fall for me?”
“Let’s see…” he thought about it while you took off his shirt and ran your hands across his toned chest, tracing all his scars like you always did. “Could have been when you scolded me about the boots and the water trail and ordered me to use the bunny towel.”
“Sheesh, you’re that easy?”
“Yeah, I’m simple like that,” Yunho muttered before drawing in to capture your lips in a slow, sensual kiss. “It’s the little things you did that made me a mess way before you defended me with all your might.”
“That was the first time you laughed,” you smiled at the memory, turning him around so you could make him sit on his bed. You got in his lap and he squeezed your thighs in appreciation. “I think you had me right there too.”
Yunho shook his head at your confession and you grinned, pushing him to make him lie down. He loved it when you did that and took your time appreciating him, kissing all his scars and massaging his scalp as you drove him a little crazy, rolling your hips on his crotch suggestively once in a while. And he let you take your time because once he took charge, once he flipped you so you were under him and let his hands run all over your body as he kissed every inch of it, and once you were skin to skin-
That’s when you were done for.
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quantumfeat72 · 2 years
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for the past few years i’ve had a personal rule that i do not sign anything i haven’t read - mostly because i genuinely think it’s a good idea, but also as a kind of social experiment - and i wanna share some observations
when i worked at an amusement park, i was one of like two or three people in a group of around twenty young adults who read the employment contract
i gave up on reading every TOS and privacy policy early on - now i only read them if it’s a website or company i’ll be giving personal information to (and even then i only skim them) - but i’ve never found anything super suspect in one
i also have an exception for when i’m made to feel like i’d be an asshole for stopping to read something. notable examples of this going into effect include the patient-intake paperwork at the ER when i went in a few months ago. (i really wish i’d just gone ahead and been the asshole in that situation, even though i have no reason to think there was anything bad in it)
i think the only time i was the only one to read something that the people who gave it to us actually wanted us to read was the waiver at a cat café, which included a lot of safety information about how to interact with the cats
one time i was approached by a guy with a petition who told me it was an anti-fracking petition (which was a real petition that was going around at the time), but the paper he handed me was a petition to instate a “citizenship requirement” for voting. i pointed this out to him and he tried to convince me that even though that’s what it said, it’s not really what my signature meant, and then named the university he graduated from as though it gave him some level of extra credibility??
i have more than once been given a HIPPA form at a doctor’s office where my signature certifies that i’ve been offered a copy of their privacy practices, when i had not, in fact, been offered a copy of their privacy practices. the last time this happened, the receptionist didn’t actually have a copy of their privacy practices, and had to get me to me sign it several days later once she got a copy from her manager
99% of people are very accommodating when you tell them “i want to read this before i sign it,” but it’s never what they’re expecting
on a related note, if someone thinks it’s important that you know what’s in something they’re giving you to sign, they won’t wait for you to read it - they’ll go through, point to each section, and tell you what it says. this is what happened when i signed my lease, and it’s actually a pretty common instance of using my asshole exception, because then i feel like i’m calling the person a liar if i stop to read it myself
the moral of the story is... like... we treat a signature like it’s the absolute most surefire way of saying “yes i understand this and agree to it,” but in practice there’s not even a pretense that a signature means you’ve READ whatever you’re signing. in fact, handing someone a piece of paper and saying “sign here” is one of the LEAST effective ways to make sure they understand and agree to something, and PEOPLE KNOW THIS, and we do it ANYWAY because what else are we gonna do? notarize it??
i don’t have a solution but like. that’s kinda fucked up, you know?
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Some things I’ve noticed on my second viewing of “Five Nights at Freddy’s” (2023)
(Some of these are obvious, don’t @ me, I’m autistic and I had work the day I first watched the film so my brain was all over the place)
Once again, SPOILERS ARE UNDER THE CUT, PLEASE DONT READ IF YOU ARE AVOIDING SPOILERS!!!!
On my first viewing I thought that showing the security guard at the very start loosening the bolts of the chair straps was a fake out to make us believe he’d escape, but actually he loosened the bolts which is how Mike was able to escape later on
Just want to say that the opening credits are fucking cool and I love them so much
In my previous post about things in the FNAF movie, I incorrectly said there was no Golden Freddy - Golden Freddy is in fact in the film, he’s the one who goes to the house/kills Aunt Jane/is in the taxi
Following on from the above point, I said last time that I thought the cupcake was the fifth ghost child but I actually think it’s Golden Freddy to be honest - the blonde girl was obviously Chica, the boy with the bunny ears was Bonnie, the ginger boy was Foxy, and then there was the blonde boy and another boy with a top hat on. I originally thought that the blonde boy who wore the brown shirt was Freddy because he seemed like the leader, but now I’m wondering if the boy with the top hat was Freddy and the leader boy was in fact Golden Freddy (given his blonde hair)? I’m interested to hear what everyone else thinks
This is obvious but the doctor foreshadowed the ending because she told Mike that drawings are powerful tools for children to express things and understand things, and that’s exactly how Abby communicated to the gang at the end that Afton was responsible for their deaths
^side note but as an early years practitioner at a nursery/for preschool children, it’s actually true that pictures are used to help children learn things even before they can read, write or talk. I don’t know, it just interested me to be like “oh yeah that’s true!!”
There was not that much focus on Mike’s dad, like he was seen so briefly compared to his mom, which makes me wonder if there’s something to it that might be revealed in a future film. Like maybe his “dad” isn’t his dad or something? Because in the game canon, William is his father, so… I don’t know. I also saw someone else point out that in the training video Mike watched, there was a man working on the animatronics who maybe looked like the actor playing Mike’s dad, so maybe his dad worked there with the animatronics?
The film appears to be set in 2000; I’m 90% sure the security cam of Mike in the careers office showed the date as being in 2000, but if someone else can clarify or confirm the exact date then that would be great. It would make sense though because Garret presumably went missing around the same time as the ghost kids (in the 80s), so the film being set in the present day (meaning Mike would be in his 50s) would make zero sense. Also the mobile phones/computers all seem like they come from the early 2000s
Someone on Twitter pointed out that one of Abby’s drawings on her wall appeared to be a red airplane, which could just be an indication/foreshadowing of her knowledge of Garret’s disappearance (his toy airplane) but also someone else said it could have been 9/11 which….?!?! If this film is set in 2000, then that’s FUCKED
(I think it’s either a random drawing or to do with Garret’s toy tbh but the idea of her having foresight of 9/11 is fucking horrifying)
I’m still not totally sure which animatronic the gang were going to force Abby into, like it’s one with spring locks and at first I thought it might be Circus Baby but it doesn’t really look like her. It looks almost like a marionette or something? And I mean, yeah, it could be that they changed the design a bit but they literally stayed faithful to the designs of all the animatronics in the series so… you know.
Desperate to know if Matthew Lillard is aware of the fact that his DILF status has been multiplied by one hundred after this film like can someone check in on him and see if he’s alright? 💀 the FNAF girlies fans are frankly RABID about Afton
On that note, I wonder if Josh Hutcherson or Matthew Lillard have ever played any FNAF games, like were they fans before being cast or…? I really wish we could have content of them talking about the film or promoting it, but Hollywood refuses to pay their actors fairly so 🤷‍♀️
Listen, I ADORE both Josh and Matthew anyway but in this film I feel like Matthew especially stood out??? Maybe it’s just the character he’s playing but he ATE this role up (so did Josh but still)
I feel like the springlock scene was actually more terrifying upon a second viewing like at my first one I was like “that’s not as bad as I imagined” but this time I was like “holy shit he’s in agony” like his screams were PAINFUL to listen to
Speaking of painful to listen to, Freddy gave this really guttural and pained roar/scream at one point during the ending and it really made my heart hurt, it’s like the child inside of him was reliving the memory of their murder or something??? I can’t describe it but it was such an intense moment
I honest to god feel like I enjoyed it more on a second viewing and I don’t know why??? Maybe it’s just because the other people in my cinema weren’t laughing every five minutes but still.
I now have the urge to rewatch ALL of Markiplier’s playthroughs of ALL the FNAF games so… yep!
Once again begging for people to talk about FNAF because I’m not the most knowledgable on the series but I do enjoy it!
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heesbaby · 10 months
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doctors orders! - sim jake
appointment twenty eight.
doctors orders! masterlist
previous | next
make sure u read the texts + written part!!!
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The moment you stepped foot in the cafe you felt like something was going to go wrong. Locking eyes with your dad, he had hardly changed in the last ten years, you felt uneasy and suddenly you didn’t want to be there.
“Y/N,” he stood up to greet you but you made no move to reciprocate his hug, instead opting to take a seat opposite where his was. “I’m glad you agreed to see me.”
You just smiled and nodded, not really sure how to respond. Luckily a waitress came to take your order pretty quickly, the two of you both ordering coffees before an awkward silence took over again.
“So, how have you been?” He asked once the mugs of steaming coffee had been placed in front of you.
You raised an eyebrow in disbelief, “how do you think I’ve been? My mum died and then six months later you pop up out of the woodwork.”
“Look, I know it’s weird, and these last few months must’ve been hard on you,” he said, drinking from his own cup. You took a moment to look at him properly, in a way you were glad you looked more like your mum than him, you didn’t want to know the man in front of you anymore. “But it was hard on me too, she was my wife as well as your mother.”
“Oh fuck off,” you spat. “You don’t get to be upset after you left us, you left the both of us and never looked back once.”
“You have to remember that it wasn’t an easy decision for me,” he tried to reason with you. “I didn’t just leave, I had been thinking about it for a long time. You have to see it from my perspective, I never wanted kids and I was trying my best to be a father to you, but it was too hard.”
“And that makes it any better?” You wanted to laugh, it made you feel sick to your stomach that you’d even agreed to see him. You felt stupid to think that it would be a good idea.
“Can’t we leave that all in the past? I want to move on, try and rebuild our relationship,” your dad said, brushing off all your concerns as if they were nothing.
“Rebuild what? You just told me you never wanted me in the first place, surely never talking to me again is what you want? God, make it make sense because right now you’re giving me a headache,” you downed your coffee in a few large gulps, not even registering the burn as it went down your throat. You just wanted an excuse to leave.
“I realized my mistake Y/N, you and your mum meant a lot to me and I hate myself for ruining it,” he leant back with a long sigh. “I want to make things right, and I was hoping you would be open to that.”
“You thought wrong,” you stood up from your seat, already having heard enough. “It was a mistake to come here, and I’d appreciate if you didn’t contact me again.”
You went to leave, tucking your chair in behind you. You dad caught your wrist but you quickly shook him off, giving him the most displeased look you could manage. The tears were already threatening to fall and you really didn’t want him to have the satisfaction of seeing you cry.
“Please Y/N, just hear me out,” he begged. “I’m the only family you’ve got left.”
“I’m done hearing you out, you’re no family to me,” you turned away before the tears could fall. “Thanks for showing me how truly shit of a person you are, at least now I can move on.”
And as he called your name, you felt a sense of deja vu, your dad watching your retreating back as you left the store. You finally let the tears fall when you were out of sight and ear shot, wiping harshly at your cheeks as you hailed for a taxi to take you back to Wonwoo and Mingyu.
You didn’t even need to speak when you entered their house, your face said enough for them to engulf you in a warm hug, their soothing words doing enough to calm you down.
“It’s ok Y/N, everything will be ok,” Mingyu mumbled into your hair as he tucked you into his neck. Wonwoo had left to go make you a drink, the taller boy taking over the job of comforting you.
“I fucking hate him Gyu,” you cried into his shoulder, the tears soaking his shirt but he didn’t care. “Why does no one want me? What did I do wrong?”
“Nothing love, you did nothing,” he felt that there was double meaning behind your words. “They just don’t deserve you, no one does.”
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ereardon · 26 days
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Before I Knew [Jake Seresin x Reader] Chapter Six
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A Jake Seresin unexpected pregnancy fic
Overview: On your first night after moving to San Diego to spend more time with your brother Bob, you unknowingly have a one night stand with his teammate Jake Seresin. For the first time in his whole life, Bob has a closely knit friend group and you’re desperate not to rock the boat. But an unexpected and unplanned pregnancy upends your world, forcing you and Jake closer together, against Bob’s wishes. What will happen when you find yourself actually falling for the father of your unborn child? 
Pairing: Jake Seresin x Reader; Bob Floyd x Sister!Reader 
Warnings: Pregnancy, cursing, eventual smut, angst
Chapter summary: Ducky goes to her first doctor's appointment; Bob and Jake fight it out; Jake makes a staggering proposal
WC: 2K
Masterlist here; previous chapter here
You caught the bus a few blocks from the library and rode it across town to the doctor’s office. Waited in the front area with all the other women in various stages of pregnancy. Your heart sank as you watched woman after woman file in with a partner at her side or a friend. 
You felt utterly alone as they called your name and you stood up alone. 
The sonographer pushed off of her stool and smiled. “The doctor will be in soon.” 
You nodded, laying back against the paper-coated exam table. When the doctor entered, she smiled softly. “Hi there, I’m Dr. Whitman.” She took a seat on the stool. “Let’s take a look here.” She pulled up the sonogram charts. “Everything looks good. You’re measuring at eight weeks and three days. How do you feel?” 
“Nauseous,” you replied. “Tired.” 
She smiled. “That’s par for the course, unfortunately. The second trimester gets better for most patients.” 
“Thank God.” 
The doctor clicked off the screen and folded her hands in her lap. “Y/N,” she said softly. “A core part of a pregnancy is a support system. Are you married?” 
You shook your head. “No.” 
“Do you have a boyfriend or family to lean on?” 
“It’s complicated,” you whispered. 
“I understand.” There was something so soothing about her. “But I also know that what many people don’t realize is that a core part of a healthy pregnancy is having people to lean on. Stress is not good for the baby.” 
“I barely know the father,” you replied. “And I’ve been staying with my brother. But he’s not happy about all of this.” 
The doctor nodded. “No pregnancy is easy to plan for,” she replied. “But keeping your stress levels low is critical, especially during this first trimester. Do you have any friends who can help support you?” 
You thought of Phoenix. So far she was the only one who seemed to want to help. You nodded. “Yeah, I think so.” 
“Good.” The doctor scribbled on a pad. “I’m going to write you a prescription for an anti-nausea medication. Take it once a day for at least a week to see if it helps.” She ripped it off and then handed you the sonogram. “And here’s a photo of your baby.” 
You held the black and white photo in both hands, choking on air. For perhaps the first time, it dawned on you. 
You were going to be a mother. 
***
“Fucking shit, Floyd, what the hell was that?” Jake whipped off his helmet the moment they stepped foot on the tarmac. 
Bob grunted and turned to storm away. Phoenix put one hand on his arm and he shrugged her off. She looked at Jake and raised her eyebrows. “Above my pay grade.” 
“He’s your back seater, Natasha,” Jake said and Phoenix’s lips pressed into a fine line. Jake only called her by her first name when things were serious. 
“He has his own mind,” she hissed back. “I can’t help it that you knocked up his sister.” 
Jake’s green eyes went wide with anger. Bradley stepped between them, trying to diffuse the attention. “Alright, hold on. Let’s just take a step back here before we say things we don’t mean.” 
“I meant it when I said you only think about yourself,” Phoenix said. Her words landed on Jake with a solid delivery. It had been three years, but their last fight still stung. 
Jake shook his head, heading toward the locker room where Bob had disappeared. Behind him, Bradley held both of Phoenix’s arms, keeping her back, his whispers blending into the whirring background noise of jets landing on the tarmac. “Floyd!” Jake’s voice rang out in the empty changing room. He was quiet for a moment before a clang caught his attention, the sound of a locker door slamming. He moved further down the halfway, rounding the corner where Bob stood wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of jeans, a frown laced over his delicate face. “Floyd, listen–”
“I pretty much raised her,” Bob interrupted. Jake frowned, but stayed silent as Bob laced his shoes, refusing to make eye contact. “Our dad left. Our mom worked all the time to put food on the table. So that left taking care of Y/N to me. And I did it, because I loved her. I did it because I wanted what was best for her.” He looked up, blue eyes hollow against sullen skin. “And now you’ve shown up and ruined everything.” 
“I didn’t know she was your sister,” Jake said. “And we didn’t mean for her to get pregnant. It just happened.” 
“But it happened to her!” Bob shouted and Jake took a step back. There was something unhinged about angry Bob. So different from the wallflower that he had always been. You were the one thing that he cared enough about to pick fights over. “You happened to her. You ruined her fucking life, Hangman.” 
“But that’s just it, isn’t it?” Jake said. “It’s her life, Floyd. Not yours. It’s hers. You’re acting like I did this to you as a personal attack.” 
“She was just starting to get her footing,” Bob said quietly. “And you took that away from her. You took away her future. Everything she worked so hard for. Everything we both worked so hard for. To get out of Chattanooga. To not end up like the rest of them.” 
Jake sighed. “So that’s what this is about, isn’t it,” he said. “It’s not about me. And it’s not even really about Y/N. It’s about you.” 
Bob squinted. “What?” 
“You’re mad because you think this foils all of your plans, all of your work, everything you did to get the two of you out of that small town life.” 
“She deserves better.” 
“I agree.” Jake shook his head. “Listen, man, I’m not going anywhere. This might not have been what I expected. Hell, it might not even be what I want. But it’s where we are. I’m not going to leave her alone in all of this.” 
“She isn’t alone,” Bob said. “She has me.” 
“Does she?” 
***
A little girl set a pile of library books on the counter in front of you. She was barely tall enough to reach, her thin arms struggling beneath the weight of the books. “Hi,” she chirped.
You turned and smiled. She had big ears and a wide, uneven grin. “Hi there,” you said, scanning the first book. “Wow, you scored big.” 
“I like bugs,” she explained and you slowly noticed every single book was about snakes or bugs. You could feel bile creep up your throat as you nodded. 
“That’s nice.” 
“Do you like bugs?” 
“Not really.” 
She frowned. “That’s too bad. Do you like puppies?” 
“Yeah, puppies are better.” You finished scanning her books. “Do you need a bag?” 
She shook her head. “No, my mommy is over there.” She pointed at a pregnant woman standing next to the door looking at her phone. The little girl cocked her head to the side. “You look like her.” 
“Really?” You squinted. The woman by the door was taller, with different hair. “How so?” 
“You’re going to be a mommy,” the little girl said. “All mommys look like that.” And then she grabbed her books and jogged off toward the door. You had to practically pick your jaw up from the ground, hands dropping to your barely visible bump. How had she known? Then again, kids were like animals. Sometimes they knew things. You watched the little girl hand the books to her mom, who slid them into a tote bag before grabbing her hand tightly. 
Something stirred inside of you. It was too soon to be the baby, realistically you knew that. But somewhere, deep down, you knew it was the baby making their presence known. 
“Hi there,” you whispered, one hand over your belly button. 
***
It was late. You were asleep on the couch when the door opened. You opened your eyes wide, watching as Jake and Bradley dragged a barely coherent Bob through the door. You stood up, wiping at your eyes. “What the hell?” 
“He’s wasted,” Bradley said. “We tried but we couldn’t stop him.” 
You put your hands on your hips, turning to Jake. “Did you do this?” 
“I’m so tired of everyone blaming me,” he replied. 
“I’m sorry,” you whispered. 
Bradley cocked his head. “Here, let me take him.” Easily, he slung Bob over one of his shoulders, carrying him straight into the bedroom. You dragged your hand over your face, turning to Jake. 
“What’s going on with him?” 
“I was going to ask you the same thing,” Jake replied, looking at his feet. “He and I, we uh, we had a fight.” 
“About what?” 
He lifted his gaze to yours. “You know what.” 
“Oh. That.” 
Jake nodded as Bradley stepped back into the living room. He looked at you, and then Jake. “I'm going to head out.” 
“Thanks for bringing him back.” 
“Any time.” Bradley paused by the door. “Hey Y/N?” 
“Yeah?” 
“Be patient with him. He’s still processing.” The door shut softly. 
“He heard me say that I hate him,” you whispered, moving back onto the couch, curling into a ball. Jake followed, sitting on the other end of the couch, a safe distance away. “Maybe he hates me, too.” 
“He doesn’t hate you,” Jake replied. “He wouldn’t act like this if he didn’t love you.” 
“Then why is he hurting me?” you whispered, a tear slipping down your cheek. 
“Because he’s hurt, too,” Jake said. “And it’s easier to be mad.” 
You tipped your head to one side. “That night we met. You had no idea I was Bob’s sister?” 
“Fuck no,” Jake replied and you smirked. He shook his head. “You’re gorgeous, but I never would have looked at you, let alone did what we did if I had known.” 
“So it wasn’t some ploy to get back at him for whatever the hell you two have beef about?” 
“This has become a lot bigger than I ever imagined.” 
You sighed. “I’m sorry I wasn’t a cool girl you met in a bar and had sex with and never saw again. I’m sorry I’m ruining your whole life.” 
“Maybe it’s not so bad,” Jake whispered and you looked up, surprised. “Maybe I needed something to change.” 
“So you’re not upset?” 
“I’m upset,” Jake clarified. “This isn’t at all what I expected. But it’s done, right?” he asked. “We just have to deal with the consequences.” 
“How romantic.” 
“Fuck.” He leaned back. “Shit, I, I didn’t mean it like that.” 
You shook your head. “It’s OK, it was a joke.” 
“But is that what you want?” he said quietly. “Something romantic?” 
“No. I don’t know.” You pulled your hair back into a loose bun, fighting for words. “I don’t know what I want. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t know anything.” 
“Are you happy here?” 
You frowned. “What do you mean here?” 
“Staying with Bob.” 
“He’s my brother.” 
“I know, Y/N.” Jake rolled his eyes. “That’s why we’re in this lovely predicament. I’m asking if you feel safe here.” 
“Bob would never hurt me.” 
“I think he already has.” Jake’s words stung and you realized for the first time that hurt was much more than just physical. “I was thinking. There’s an apartment across the hall from mine. It’s two bedrooms.” 
“Are you asking me to move in with you?” You practically scoffed. 
Jake shrugged. “Why not? At least for now. Until he cools down.” 
“That’ll only make him angrier.” 
“I don’t give a shit about what makes Floyd happy,” Jake said. “I care about what’s best for you.” 
“Do you actually?” you pressed. “Or is that just what you think you’re supposed to say and feel and do? Take away all of the outside voices and opinions. What do you, Jake Seresin, want?” 
He was quiet for a moment. Then, in the smallest voice you had ever heard, he replied, “To be a good dad. To do the right thing.” 
You nodded. “OK. I’ll move in with you.” You looked up into his clear green eyes. For the first time in weeks, you felt hopeful.
Please follow my library page @ereardonlibrary as that will largely serve as my tag list. Anyone I previous promised to tag is here:
@bobfloydsbabe @blue-aconite @wkndwlff @mamachasesmayhem @mandylove1000 @djs8891 @clancycucumber230 @rosiahills22 @buckysteveloki-me  @kmc1989 @gigisimsonmars @eloquentdreamer @mjisbby @shanimallina87 @seresinslady @seresinhangmanjake @blackwidownat2814 @yanna-banana @bbyvanessaa  @mrsjobarnes @midnightmagpiemama @ingoaliesitrust @rockbottomphilosophies-blog @iangiemae @joaquinwhorres @boiolay @sometimesanalice @spinning-away @mycobrakai1972 @xomrsalliej4787xo @na-ta-sh-aa
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helios-writings · 1 month
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Headaches
Roronoa Zoro x Sanji x gn! Reader
wc: 1.3k
warnings: none
Sanji and Zoro have been fighting a lot more lately, and you’re determined to find out why
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You were tired of stopping fights. It seemed almost every day at this point that it was happening, you wake up, Sanji and Zoro are bickering. You make port, they’re fighting. Even Chopper was getting tired of patching up their bruises.
You knew they bickered, you saw it from the very beginning, but you have no idea what could’ve made it worse. So far, it’s been a normal day on the Sunny, heat bearing down and the ocean carrying a cool breeze, one that leads you to a small town.
It’s as you’ve gathered your things that you hear a loud crash from up on deck, and you rush upstairs, fearing the worst. But when you reach the top, it’s Zoro and Sanji again, the former having shoved the cook so roughly into the taffrail that it’s broken.
Franky and Usopp both let a bewildered cry, but you? You’re steaming. A scuffle here and there is one thing, but this has gotten out of hand.
You storm up to them, pulling them apart with the help of Robin before practically getting in both of their faces. “What the actual fuc- no, you know what, let’s go somewhere else.”
You drag the two men below deck by their arms, not struggling to break free even though they could. You shove them both down onto two separate chairs.
“What the actual fuck has been wrong with you two? I know you bicker, but this is out of hand!”
They - well, Sanji, - look sheepish, but stay silent. You look at them both and then the nearby window. Luffy won’t even notice if one of them goes overboard, right?
The swordsman cracks under the weight of your glare. “Fuck, alright. Tell her, Curly.”
The chef gawks. “Me? What about you?!”
“It was your idea!”
“The hell it was!”
You pinch your nose bridge. “One of you just spit it out. Now.”
They explain the situation, leaving you wide eyed and jaw open by the time they’re done.
“You just decided to fight over who gets to go out with me?! You didn’t even ask me!”
“We thought-“
“Well, please never think again if that’s the kind of ideas you two are going to come up with.”
“We’re sorry.” Sanji tells you, elbowing his partner in crime in the side.
“Yeah, sorry.”
You know that Zoro is just annoyed, so you don’t take his half assed apology to heart. You do level with them, however.
“You’re both insane if you think I’m dating either one of you after this.”
Both of their eyes widen. “But-“
“I’m serious. What would you have done if one of you had won and I didn’t even like you? You didn’t make any efforts to win my affection, you didn’t take my feelings into account at all. The only thing either of you gave me was a headache.”
“Well, then tell us how we win you over.” Zoro says, a fierce look in his eye.
“Oh, so you don’t even know how, okay.”
“I’m serious. He’s serious. Tell us what to do.”
You sigh. Knowing Zoro, you know he’s not likely to do anything halfway, and Sanji is sure to do the same. Headaches, the two of them.
“Well, for starters, no one likes breaking up fights everyday and hauling you to the doctor. So start there, start trying to get along.” You think, oh there’s no way they go along with this.
But the two men just sigh with sad acceptance. “Alright. What’s next?”
You truly don’t know what to say, you didn’t think you’d get this far with them. “Being helpful would be nice. Uh, I hear people like gifts.”
“Don’t tell us what other people want,” urges Sanji, “tell us what you want.”
You groan. “I don’t know, okay? I’ve been on the sea with you two for years, so I don’t have a lot of people trying to woo me. Just….I don’t know, be nice to me or something. Talk to me. Make an effort to actually get to know me.”
They both nod and you dismiss them from their seats. After Sanji leaves, Zoro turns to you.
“Hey. We really are sorry about what went down.”
You just nod. “I know.”
***
There really is a change in the air over the next few weeks. The fighting between the two isn’t gone, but there’s less of it. Sanji asks for your help in the kitchen and Zoro often asks if you want to spar with him. When you go into town, one or both of them follow you, bickering over who gets to carry what. It really is sweet to see, and it does flatter you. You’re almost surprised at how much you like being around them.
“Hey, come look at this!” Sanji calls over to you, Zoro already standing close beside him.
You walk up to the little stall. “What's up?”
The chef grins, holding up a few bracelets to you. “Which one do you want? Fair warning, Mosshead wants the black one even if he says he doesn’t.”
Zoro lets out a protest, but you can tell he doesn’t mean it. You settle on a green and yellow one that looks pretty enough, the elaborate braids combining the colors in a way that you enjoy. That leaves Sanji with a black and blue one.
Sanji ties the bracelet around your wrist, his deft fingers making quick work of it. “There. Nice, right?”
You nod, feeling your face get warm. “Do you need help with yours?”
“I’ve got it, but between you and I, Zoro might need help with his.”
You shoot him a puzzled look, but walk over to the swordsman, who is indeed struggling to fasten the small bracelet.
You laugh quietly and take the bracelet from him, he then hands you his wrist. His skin is warm to the touch in your hand, this close you can see the calluses and scars from the many years of sword fighting. You fasten the bracelet for him.
“There. Now we all match.” You tell them.
They both turn red.
***
That night, as you venture into the kitchen after everyone’s asleep, you stumble upon quite a scene. Sanji is pressed against the counter, Zoro against him, pressing kisses into his neck and hair.
You gasp in surprise and they turn, mortified and jump apart.
You go to walk away but Sanji practically leaps across the room to stop you.
“W-wait! Let us explain.”
You still and let Zoro guide you to a chair. Sanji slides a cup of warm tea over to you before they both sit in a chair.
“We do like you.” The chef supplies before you can say anything.
“But, spending time with you and getting our own shit together….well. Curly’s insatiable.” Zoro has a smug grin on his face, which makes Sanji smack him.
Your head, however, is spinning. “Wait. Explain one more time.”
“We,” Sanji starts, gesturing between the two of them, “want to date you. Together.”
“How….how would that even work?”
“I don’t know,” Zoro answers, “but I want to try.”
You nod. “Okay.”
Sanji grins before leaning forward, only stopping when you nod. He kisses you softly, it makes warmth blossom from your chest and you smile into it.
“Okay Curly, my turn.”
The chef rolls his eyes but pulls away, kissing Zoro briefly before the other man does the same to you.
Zoro’s kiss is different. Where Sanji was soft, his was almost desperate, lips pressing fervently against yours. Sanji laughs softly in the background.
“You’re going to suffocate them if you keep that up.”
Zoro flips him off, but lets you go almost reluctantly.
Your head is spinning, but you smile. “Well, you two can get along.”
“It’s hard work, but it paid off I suppose.”
You took their hands in each of your own. “I think this’ll work out.”
They grin back at you. “I think so too.”
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intotitties · 5 months
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mm maybe a hazel x cheerleader!gf!reader where reader is a little taller than hazel and usually wears heels and that makes her taller and more intimidating, as if the majority of the school pisses themselves in fear every time she passes by except for hazel who only looks at her with heart eyes. Obviously all this if you feel comfortable!
Hazel Callahan x reader
warnings: cursing, mention of broken bones
a/n: it took sm time to write this bc i had 72817938 ideas at the same time but i love the idea
-ˋˏ ༻❀༺ ˎˊ-
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You were one of the popular cheerleaders who has always been told that she looks scary. When people in the school hear a characteristic noise of heels they immediately get out of the way, knowing that you are coming. Everyone feared you.. except for her.
— Morning Hazee - you hugged your girlfriend from the back in front of the girls from the fight club that she was a member of.
— O-oh good morning - she blushed at your gesture.
— Are we still up for tonight? - you pecked her cheek.
Hazel nodded slightly, her friends from the fight club looking at you both like they couldn’t believe their eyes.
You ran your hand through her hair and left to the class with a smile on your face. The only thing you could hear was Hazels friends whispering behind your back.
— I don’t know what you see in her - Britt said as she sat down on her table.
— Good, i hope no one else than me does - you winked at her.
— No but really, she’s a weirdo - said Isabel.
— You’re literally crushing on Josie, you don’t have the right to speak up - you giggled at which she just rolled her eyes.
— Anyways, are you going to train the choreography with us later? - Brittany asked.
— Isn’t the gym taken by the fight club after lessons? - you looked at your friends.
— We can just tell them that we need to practice, gyms big I’m sure we won’t be disturbing them a lot - she answered before the class started.
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As soon as the lessons ended, you, Brittany and Isabel went straight to the gym.
Girls from the fight club had already started and you could see Hazel and PJ throwing punches at eachother.
— Hi girls! - Isabel came closer - Would you mind if we use the corner to train our choreography? - she smiled.
— No! - Josie answered immediately - I mean.. go ahead, please - she corrected herself nervously.
She’s such a simp.
You sent a smile to your girlfriend and went to the corner with your friends.
The time passed quickly and in nice atmosphere. You noticed a lot of looks in your direction, which made you smile a little bit.
You were doing the last step of the choreography - backflip. You’ve always feared it the most of all the acrobatic stuff you’ve learned.
But instead of landing on the ground, you tripped on a ball and fell down with a scream.
— Oh my god ladies i’m so sorry, it was supposed to be them! - Tim ran to you immediately.
Of course, he wanted to eliminate the club members.
— You’re pathetic Tim - Isabel said while helping you to stand up.
— Fuck! - you hissed - I swear if you broke my arm, i will end your sad little life.
— Slay girl! You tell him! - Sylvie hyped you up.
— I said that im sorry, now you’re just being dramatic - he said.
— Yeah? So im gonna tell you something - you said quieter - I’ve got videos from the last party and guess who’s the main character? - you looked at him with a smirk on your face - you. so you better leave the club alone, and be more careful next time - your smirk disappeared with the end of the sentence.
You waved him goodbye as he left without any words.
Before you could say anything you felt Hazels body crashing into yours and her messy kisses on your lips. It took you a while to turn it into a gentle yet passionate kiss.
— Thank you so much for dealing with him for us! - she wanted to hug you but you stopped her.
— Please call a doctor first.. im gonna pass out - you said as you looked at the bone sticking out of your arm.
-ˋˏ ༻❀༺ ˎˊ-
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tiddygame · 1 month
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i’ve stared at this for so long that i now hate it and think ive lost all concept of how to write so take this and get it out of my google docs
the introduction is rough and the medical depictions (and accuracy/realism) could use some (a lot of) work but whatever! here it is, my vague yet still oddly specific idea of how the face reveal would go in @myriadblvck ’s streamer au:
tw: description of a panic attack? i think?
[this takes place post first irl meet but before they’re officially together]
imagine ghost has a glasgow smile but on one side they carved a little too deep and left some nerve damage. time and surgery helped, after which he could eat unimpeded and talk without a lisp, but there's still some facial nerve damage and/or skin contractures from scarring, specifically around the corner of his mouth.
now, everytime he smiles, be it shit eating grin or a full genuine joy filled smile that not even grumpy mcgrumperson could hold off, it always looks wrong because one corner doesn't raise fully like the other.
everything else is fine, there isn’t any facial paralysis, he just smiles… wrong. especially since only one eye properly squints when he smiles, giving him the look of someone who got stuck mid wink.
if he wants to look “normal” (or as normal as he could get it) he has to manually squint his other eye. still, it always felt weird; you don't realize how much those muscles affect the rest of your face until they're gone.
it's why he learned to always wear the mask.
when his expression is neutral, you don’t really notice it. if you can see his mouth when he talks however, it’s obvious that there’s something wrong. he wouldn’t say he’s necessarily ashamed of the scars and damage itself, but it’s the stares that are the worst. before he started hiding behind it, people would openly gawk or even glare at him as if he was some ne’er-do-well gang member that got what was coming to him.
he still remembers the cosmetic surgeon that had been talking to him about fixing the contractures— the whole appointment was a fucking nightmare. the cuts had healed nicely enough especially considering how bad it could have been; he was lucky to only need a little cosmetic help. the only reason he was there was so he could fucking eat food without struggling to open his mouth.
the doctor spent god knows how long breaking down everything wrong with his face like he was a fucking car mechanic lying about how dirty your filter is. the guy constantly mentioned that while he was under, they could also fix his jawline, do a rhinoplasty, trying to break him down to agree to more work.
he was already fuming my the time the doc brought up how kids would react. asking ghost if he wanted to scare children since “you cant expect the little youngins that are still learning about the world to not get scared by something scary,” and that “even some adults would cringe at the scarring.”
what stuck out most was the condescending smile he had when he said it. as if he was pointing out the obvious and ghost was being stupid and shortsighted by not agreeing.
he declined everything except what was medically necessary. the procedure went fine and after an aggravatingly long recovery period, he could eat solid foods again without issue. but the comments still stuck with him.
…okay, maybe he’s a little ashamed.
scaring kids with your face doesn’t feel good and being reminded of everything you’ve lost when you try to smile can really fuck you up in a way words fail to describe.
so yeah, he hates it. he’s gotten used to the mask, both skull clad balaclava and simple medical mask, being a permanent layer of armor. even now that he’s a bit more comfortable in his own skin it still feels wrong to pull it off.
when he gets close to soap, it still feels like a layer of vulnerability that he’ll never be prepared for.
the first time he let soap see his face, there hadn’t been any grandiose build up, no extravagant planning.
simon had arrived just a few hours earlier. he hated commercial flights with a burning passion but it was always worth it to see johnny.
with soaps twin out of town for the week, he had decided to take leave to spend time with his friend, a friend that he most certainly did NOT have a crush on (a disclaimer roach and gaz heard everytime they started snickering over ghost taking leave.)
johnny had cooked something nice and simple for dinner, saying that simon had spent too long with MREs and deserved real food (ghost only agreed if he was the one washing the dishes, soap had laughed and told him he's not so kind as to let him off the hook for chores).
when they ate, it was always in the living room with johnny taking care to always stay angled away from simon, never trying to catch a glimpse, regardless of how much he wanted to see what was under the mask. the obvious gesture of kindness and respect for his boundaries always left him feeling all weird and fuzzy inside. but, then again, johnny seemed pretty good at triggering that feeling in general.
their finished plates were on the coffee table and johnny was watching whatever dumb movie he had put on. he was pretty sure the man spent more time talking over it and making fun of everything than he did actually watching it (it was simon’s favorite way to watch a movie.)
ghost however, was watching soap. thinking.
in the end, it was an impulsive decision made after a strong three seconds of consideration.
“you uhm— you can look by the way,” ghost stared at the can of soda in his hands, immediately regretting the words.
“what?” soap didn’t fully turn, just shifted slightly to hear him better. a simple gesture to show he was listening without turning to face him. it normally made simon happy to see that johnny was more than willing to accommodate for his boundaries. now though it made him feel stupid for robbing johnny of a normal face to face conversation, a normal human interaction, just over his idiotic insecurities.
“my face, you—,” he felt his heart block his airway and tried clearing his throat before continuing, “you can look if you want,” christ he wanted the ground to swallow him whole. why was he getting so fucked up over this?
“are you sure?” he hadn’t turned yet, but ghost could see his pensive expression from here. this should be nothing. realistically, he knew johnny seeing his scars wouldn’t suddenly make him hate him… right?
“yes.”
but it was more than the fear of hatred, wasn’t it? he was scared that johnny would see him. see more than just the scars, see all of the ugly idiosyncrasies and insecurities laid bare. afraid that johnny would see the truth of how unlovable he was.
jesus he was getting so fucking worked up and dramatic over nothing.
ghost didn’t look up. he made an effort to not focus on his peripheral vision. he heard soap turn, heard the intake of breath. the silence was loud only for a second. then, deafening white noise surrounded him, inescapable, suffocating.
fuck.
he didn’t regret giving permission but god did he regret everything else; the stupid scars, the stupid nerve damage, the stupid way he had managed to fall for someone so fucking good like johnny while he was unequivocally unworthy of his love.
stop being so fucking dramatic. you are not together, never have been and never will be. reality was blatant in front of him but it didn’t stop his heart from foolishly hoping.
he heard soap stand and walk closer. saw from where he was still staring a hole in the can his feet step in front of his. saw johnny’s hands raise. he took a deep breath in, closed his eyes, and with a great deal of effort didn’t flinch when soaps fingers grazed his cheek.
both of his hands came up to cup his face, holding him and ever so slightly tilting his face up, giving him the chance to pull away. he didn’t. he may be a coward but he wasn’t backing down.
ghost eventually opened his eyes to see soap staring at him with wide eyes. he looked away, staring off to some point on the right. he hated not knowing what soap was thinking.
they stayed there for a while before soap broke the silence, muttering, “i fuckin knew you had freckles.”
it was stupid but it shocked a laugh out of ghost. he meant to drop his head, embarrassed that something so dumb made him laugh, but accidentally just pushed himself further into soaps hands making him blush.
he looked up and saw soap staring even harder than before. the chuckle died in his chest.
“do that again.”
ghost just gave him a confused look.
“smile.”
such a simple request, a one word sentence, but it set his face ablaze. his breath caught in his throat, somewhere around where his heart was still trying to choke him.
…he hadn’t thought it was that bad but soaps reaction indicated otherwise. fuck. was his it that awful? he wanted the ground to swallow him whole. this was stupid. he was stupid.
“simon,” of course, one word from johnny and it felt like he could breathe again.
“please?”
fucking goddamn soap and his stupid fucking puppy dog eyes and the way he has ghost wrapped around his fucking finger without even realizing.
ghost smiled. there was no real mirth, more a grimace than anything else. he just wanted to get this over with.
soap was still staring at him, his thumbs tracing his lips, following scars, drawing imaginary lines between freckles… if he wasn't so terrified it might have felt nice.
“Christ,” ghosts heart cracked more, “you weren't lying when you said you were beautiful.”
ghost huffed a laugh and went back to staring off to the right, the fake smile dropping. of course soap would try to lighten the mood with a joke.
his panic fled as quickly as it had consumed him, now just left sitting in soap's living room, face still cradled in caring hands, resigned to his mistakes.
he felt so tired and johnny's hands felt so inviting.
“i wasn't joking,” soap looked…upset? angry? wait— fuck, what’d he do?
ghost stared back at soap, confused and tired. soaps nails felt the grooves of the scar, catching where the skin was raised and lowered.
“you don't have to lie, soap. im a grown man. I'm not fragile. you don't need to coddle me,” ghost said it like it was a joke, hoping soap would laugh along and that this would all just blow over. that tomorrow morning they could forget this ever happened.
“are you calling me a liar?” soap’s brow furrowed. great. instead, he had managed to make everything worse and piss off soap as well.
ghost took in a deep breath, giving himself another shot at calming things down, “no, I'm not. I think you're lying, but you're not a liar,” he stood and stepped to the side, grabbing their dirty plates and walking them to the kitchen sink, “you just don't want to upset me, it's fine. I get it. you're a nice person but you don't have to lie to spare my feelings.”
“I am not fucking lying!” as per usual, all ghost had managed to do was make things worse. there’s a reason he had decided to stick to the battlefield and give up on domesticity.
“well alright then. agree to disagree,” he turned the kitchen tap and started rinsing the dishes, waiting for the water to heat up. just walk away. end it there. let us forget about this stupid blunder and move on. please just leave it. please, please, please—
“no.”
the force behind it damn near made ghost drop the plate he was holding. he managed to set it in the sink carefully and turned to face soap, who was now in the kitchen as well.
“i— I'm not just gonna fucking— simon,” soap took in a deeper breath and went to continue but ghost was faster.
“johnny,” he interrupted, walking forward with his hands up in a gesture of surrender, approaching slowly.
one last chance to not fuck everything up.
“the fact is they're called deformities for a reason. they're not cute. they're not pretty. they're your body’s way of healing what it can and protecting what it can't. it's not meant to look nice, it's just—”
“bullshit they’re not pretty! says fucking who?” the genuine distress in soap’s voice and force behind his words caught him off guard. “simon—”
he huffed and ran his fingers through his hair roughly, pulling slightly at the strands. christ, ghost needs to shut the fuck up. every single time he speaks he just upsets soap more and more.
he needs to retake his hostage negotiations courses. clearly he has forgotten everything about how to diffuse a situation.
johnny takes another second to breathe and collect his thoughts before he speaks.
“simon. I know that— that ‘this’ isn't something that's going to fix itself overnight and I don't expect it to. but, ‘the fact is,’ I think you're pretty.”
ghost opens his mouth to disagree but johnny doesn’t let him.
“no no,” johnny put his hand over simon’s mouth, shocking him into silence. he blinks twice, stupefied.
“i think— no. I know you're pretty. cute even. beautiful is a given but obviously worth mentioning.”
his hand moved to cup simon’s cheek. ghost grabbed his wrist but didn’t stop him, wether it was a warning or encouragement he himself didn’t know.
johnny continued, unperturbed, “you disagreeing doesn't change that, right?”
there was a pause and simon realized he wanted an answer.
“johnny-”
“ah ah!” his hand moved back to cover his mouth, grabbing his face and shaking his head back and forth, over accentuating his words, “you disagreeing doesn't change that, right? yes or no.”
he stopped shaking him and moved his hand back to simon’s cheek. simon sighed, defeated, “yes. you are right.”
johnny looked smug, “good. and what do you say when i give you a compliment you don’t agree with?”
simon sputtered, “wha— i don't fucking know—”
“nothing! you don’t say anything!” soap looked way too proud of himself and he continued, “or thank you if you feel so inclined.”
“that was a trick question,” simon replied eventually.
johnny thumbed over his scars once more, again tracing them, “sure it was. now go take a shower.”
he patted his cheek twice and walked to the hallway.
“wait,” johnny probably shook the few remaining brain cells out of his head. “this whole conversation ends with you telling me that I stink?”
“yes. rancid,” johnny opened the door to the linen closet. simon was still in the kitchen. the tap was still running.
“no dipshit, do you not remember telling me that commercial planes makes you feel gross?” johnny threw a towel at him, which he caught just in time for johnny to hit him with a bath rag.
ghost had mentioned that… ages ago, he thinks. on facetime with each other, discussing the merits of bathrooms on public transport. he had said that enclosed, crowded spaces like commercial planes or buses made him feel, well, gross. how—or why—did he remember that?
“but… I’m supposed to wash the dishes?” a weak argument against the stubbornness he was faced with but simon had officially lost track of his mind and this conversation.
johnny shot him a weird look as he walked back towards the kitchen sink. simon still hadn’t moved.
“did you think i was being serious earlier?”
“yes???” he felt like he had been given a lobotomy.
johnny decided to take pity on him and explained in a soft voice that felt out of place, “i was being sarcastic. i’m not going to make you wash the dishes, simon.”
“but that was the agreement: you cook and i wash the dishes.”
johnny laughed as if he remembered something funny, “yeah, i lied.”
simon still stood there, trying to figure out if he had a stroke. johnny had been angry, completely pissed at him, but now was letting him off the hook and calling him pretty? what the fuck is happening?
johnny turned him and pushed him towards the hallway. simon could have resisted but his resolve always seems to crumble around johnny mactavish.
“now go shower, you beautiful bastard,” soap grabbed one of the plates out of the sink and started washing it with water that had probably heated ages ago.
ghost walked towards the bathroom, feeling like he was on autopilot, limbs disconnected from his brain. his cheek still felt… odd? weird? tingly?
it felt something from where johnny had grabbed it. ghost thinks… he thinks he likes the feeling, whatever it is.
he needs to sleep.
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sassysaxsolo · 10 months
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The Heart Wants What the Heart Wants Part Two (Yandere! Poly! Kyojuro x Mono Reader)
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Tw: Blood, cheating, attempted rape, mentions of suicide or thoughts of suicide, reader being treated like an animal.
Synopsis: Kyojuro has made swell recovery and finally comes home so he can marry the girl of his dreams, you! However, its easy to lose whatever feelings you had for your former fiance after his polamorous partner's kidnap you and lock you in a basement for a month
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“Hey!” Kanae cheered as she opened the door to her house as Kyojuro and Tengen got out of the car. She hustled down the steps to give him a kiss before wrapping her arms around him. He too embraced her, just happy to be with his partners once again. “I missed you guys so much.” He said.
“Come on big man, everyone is inside, waiting for you!” Tengen exclaimed as they made their way inside. Everyone gathered around him and greeted him, a hug, a kiss and telling him how worried they were about him. He was just so happy at that moment. To finally be back with his loved ones after being in intensive care for over a month. The doctors deemed him healthy and it helped his parents pay off the hospital to release him early.
“So, we have everything planned! The wedding venue, the dj, the photographer and we’ve ‘helped’ pick out your special girl’s dress!” Mitsuri exclaimed, happy she got to help plan a wedding that wasn’t hers. “I’m so happy you guys have helped out on such short notice. My wedding day will be all the more special now that I know you guys helped..” Kyojuro smiled.
“So? She’s down stairs in the basement- don’t worry! We’ve kept her safe, warm and well fed. I’m sure she’s dying to see you again.” Shinobu said, standing up and setting her cake down.
“Y-Yes! Where is she? I’ve been dying to see her!” He exclaimed, the thought of seeing you again had been on his mind since the last time he saw you. He never meant to hurt you the way he did, you just didn’t understand how it was for him, being a polyamorous man.
But you would soon see, when he becomes your husband, he’ll do a better job as your partner. You’ll never be hurt by him again.
“Great! We’ll go get her then.” Hinatsuru said as she stood up with Makio and Suma and left the living area. “Are you sure you’re ready to see her? After the hurt she put you through?” Obanai asked.
“Of course I am. During my stay, I’ve had to realize my own shortcomings. She must have felt second to you guys hence why she left me.”
“Nonsense, you didn’t do anything wrong!” Kanae said, grabbing hold of his hands.
“Yeah, she was just acting like a jealous bitch.”
“Please Sanemi. Don’t call her that. Though, I must admit, I like the thought of her being jealous. It only means she really loves me.” Kyojuro smiled.
Suma peeked through the doorway. “Um.. guys..” She said anxiously. Everyone had their eyes on her. “Suma? What’s wrong?” Tengen asked.
“U-Um… Well..-”
“She’s gone! She’s fucking gone!” Makio screamed passing Suma, everyone had panicked looks on their faces. “WHAT!?” Saenemi shouted.
“Who let this happen?!” Obanai exclaimed.
“How did she get out?!” Shinobu yelled.
Kyojuro got up from his seat and went down to the basement where he found Hinatsura trying to clean up the broken glass on the floor and a hefty amount of blood smeared on the wall.
“(Y/n)... why must you fight with me..?” He said, a tear running down his face, more distressed by the fact that you’ve once again tried to leave him than that you're hurt by the blood covering your cell.
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“Huhh….” You were so weak, so terribly weak. Your escape plan was not one that was well thought out, but one rather acted with haste and recklessness. But you overheard your captors talking about your Ex Fiance being released from the psych ward, meaning you had little time to spare before you were married to him.
The idea was stupid, you found something you were able to hide in your inner thigh, a butter knife.  They always had Shinobu or Kanae watch you eat so you didn’t hide anything, but that morning, they told you Kyojuro was coming home that day, they didn't check your tray. You bashed the knife against the window until it shattered. Your feet were cut up and bloody and you accidentally impaled yourself on a piece of glass, but only enough to break the skin.
You tried to jog through the forested area but you were becoming dizzy. You were losing too much blood. “Fuck….” You muttered.
“(Y/n)!” Giyuu cried.
“Does anyone see any blood?”  Mitsuri asked.
“Nah! The rain is washing away her traces! I can’t see any tracks!” Sanemi yelled.
You felt your heart race, they were on to you! “Gagh!” You lost your footing and slipped, landing on your side. You were lost, you had no sense of direction and you were bleeding out. At this point, you released a fury of tears, it was unfair! It was so unfair! What did you do to deserve any of this?
“(Y/n)?” Said the familiar voice of your fiance. You look over and see his blurry figure approach but you knew it was him. “N-no…”
He kneeled down and held you in his arms. “My love, let's stop fighting, this is only hurting us both..”
“N..No.. You did that to yourself… the only one who got hurt was me..!” You argued, but you felt a finger intrude your wound. “Mmmhhhaaagggghhh!” You wailed in pain.
“Please dear, don’t say things you clearly don’t mean.” It wasn’t too long before you saw spots of black in your vision, passing out from the pain.
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“I’ve cleared out the dirt and sutured up the wound, however, she needs to rest, she lost a lot of blood..” Shinobu said, as she stood beside Kyojuro who sat by your unconscious form. “This isn’t anything serious though… not something that would require her to go to the hospital…” He asked.
“Kyojuro, you know better than anyone here that I’m the top of my class in the field of surgery, no matter how big the wound, I can handle it, no hospital required~” She purred, making him smile. “Thank you Shinobu, how can I ever repay you..?”
“I think of a few ways~” She sang before leaning onto his lap, he pulled her in for a kiss.
You just happened to wake up as the kiss initiated but you hadn’t dared to speak a word. They carried on as if you were there which only made you wonder, how could god create such a selfish man. He wanted to marry you while seeing other people too while you didn't.
You turned your head so you didn’t have to look at them, but Shinobu noticed your movement. “She’s awake.” Kyojuro looked your way before Shinobu pulled away to give you two space. “(Y/n)..! My love! How have you been?”
You didn’t say anything, you didn’t want to say anything, you didn’t want to look at him, touch him, be anywhere near him but here you were. “My darling, please talk to me. It's been too long since we’ve spoken…”
“Ah… well, she hasn’t really spoken at all since we took her…” Shinobu said.
That was true, your heart was filled with nothing but contempt and disgust for these people. Only giving short answers where needed. You’ve seen too many horror movies to know what would happen if you acted out. You remained as docile as could, trying your best to not let your frustration out whenever they were around.
“Ah? Okay. Thank you Shinobu. I hope you don’t mind, but I think (Y/n) would be more comfortable if it was just us talking.”
“Of course, you know where we are.” She kissed him on the forehead before exiting the bedroom. He sat further on the bed, to see your face but you turned it some more so it was out of his gaze. “(Y/n), please talk to me, do you know how upsetting this whole ordeal has been for me?”
“You..?”
You looked at him, a face of pure revolt looking him dead in the eye. “You’re upset?”
“(Y/n)-”
“I’M THE ONE WHO GOT FUCKING KIDNAPPED YOU PSYCHOPATH!” You roared, sitting up. 
“(Y/n), your wounds-”
“I broke up with you because of your unfair treatment of me! Then instead of fucking getting over it and excepting any sort of responsibility, you try take the cowards way out and your fuck buddies blame me! They came after me! Knocked my fucking door down and took me away! Gagged me, blindfolded me. Made me sleep in the cold fucking basement with thin ass clothes and a single blanket to my name, kept me to a single meal a day and if that wasn’t bad enough, had someone watch me bath and shit! I was afforded no privacy, no fucking decency or respect. I was treated like a fucking animal for the past month so don’t your dare tell me YOUR upset!” 
You looked down and saw some blood leaking through your clothes. “Fuck me..”
“I’m sorry you feel that way my love… but I swear on my life, I’m going to fix this. Fix all of this and we can be happy…!”
“Kyojuro. If you have any love for me in your heart, you’ll let me go.” 
“I… I can’t do that (Y/n).... I’m weak without you..” He mumbled.
“Kyojuro, you have ten partners… you don’t need me, you never had.”
You tried to look away but he pulled your face towards his and leaned his forehead against yours. “You're wrong, I do need you, I need all of you in my life. I’m sorry I made you feel second to my partners, even though you’re going to be my wife.”
“Then why do you not give me the same treatment? You don’t touch me how you touch them, why did I have to feel more passion from a dickhead like Akaza then with you-”
“I’m sorry! Okay..?! I’m so sorry….!” He cried, holding your hand tightly. His tears looked real, you couldn’t tell if they were crocodile tears or not. “When you told me you liked him more than me, I felt so inadequate as a partner! That you preferred the touch of another man than that of your own fiance, it broke me. I feared… that you would actually consider… being with Akaza…”
“Do you have any idea how hypocritical you sound..?”
“What…?”
“You get with other people everyday without any cause or concern for my feelings! Do you have any idea how inadequate I felt as a partner? Say if we do get past this and our supposed future kids see that I’m unhappy every single fucking day because you’d rather go and spend the evening fucking Uncle Obanai and aunty Mitsuri?”
“I would never put my partners above my kids! Everyone here is like you and me, they all want to get married and start their own families, it's a conversation we’ve all had before, that our relationship never comes before any of our children! It's a mistake many polyamourous partners make and one that we don’t intend on doing!”
“But what about me? The woman you want to marry? At the end of the day, I’m going to be the unhappy one in this relationship because you atleast have ten partners to turn to when you're upset, I have no one.”
“But I’m going to be your husband!”
“What do you suggest then? Huh? How do you plan on keeping me happy? What's to stop me from taking a knife while you're away one day and slitting my throat just so I could end it all?”
“You….. You wouldn’t do that to yourself..”
“We’re all capable of depravity… Kyojuro. I would let you see how vicious I can become but I think we both know who the bigger person is in this situation. “
He exhaled, very frustrated and anxious he was by your threat alone, he stood up and pulled your shirt up, revealing your soaked bandages. “You need to change these, otherwise you’ll bleed out.”
“That seems nice.” You said sarcastically. 
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“I don’t know what to do with her…. She hates me..” he said sadly as he kept his head on the table, not looking at anyone. 
“Is she still being a meanie?” Mitsuri asks.
“She’s a bitter envious woman, it can’t be helped.” Obanai said.
Kyojuro looked at the couple, a thought coming to his head. “I have a question for you both, and I want you two to answer me as honestly as you can.” They both looked at each other before back at him. “What is it?" the smaller man asked.
“Have either of you put the group before each other?” He asked.
The two looked at each other seriously, but Mitsuri spoke up first. “I love all you guys, all of you are important to me,I couldn’t imagine my life without any of you in it, but Obanai is my number one, if… I was ever forced to pick… and I know it sounds cruel of me… but I’d probably pick him… he is going to be my husband soon..”
“Yes and your going to be my wife…!” Obanai said, holding Mitsuri’s hand tenderly before looking at Kyojuro. “Not that we don’t love everyone even less, but Mitsuri will always be my most special person…. As (Y/n) is to you..”
“That’s where I went wrong, You guys would never make each other second because you both understand one another more than anyone else. I was supposed to be that for (Y/n) but I have neglected her in that aspect, She must have felt so left out…”
“Then why not bring her into the circle?” Suma asked, carrying a tray with a good china tea set.
“That's the problem, (Y/n) is a monogamous person, she only agreed to date Kyojuro on the condition she’d never have to see us with him intimately.”
“But it was bound to happen eventually… it's hard to hide such things from your partner…." Mitsuri whined.
Hinatsuru entered the room and hummed a bit. “I’m gonna try to put myself in (Y/n) shoes for a bit… she’s a monogamous person so as a monogamous person, she’d probably much rather be with someone who is also monogamous. Someone from outside your relationship could say that you're cheating on her, not just physically but emotionally.”
That’s what Kyojuro needed to hear. Cheating. He was cheating on you, even though he polyamorous, you would never be okay with it.
“But……! Hear me out!” Suma said, setting down the tray and sitting down. 
“What… if we made her think… this is what she wanted too?”
“How would I ever get her to come to that mindset?” Kyojuro asked, rubbing his eyes.
“Simple, we just need her to fall for everyone here.”
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Kyojuro thought about it. He sat by the edge of the bed, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. You were his perfect little darling. He was your first everything.  He loved his partners but he could dream of a life with you, where he would come home to the kids playing in the back garden while helping you with dinner. Both of you would be involved parents and give your kids the best of the best, there was the matter of his partners where he kept you away from the group.
He liked the idea of him being your one and only, he never anticipated on you being a virgin when you first met but it dragged him into a delusion that he could protect you. His pretty, innocent wife. The pure and great mother of his children who can do no wrong. He can’t leave his partners, never, but he can’t expect you to be the perfect little doll he always envisioned. You were your own person.
You had fallen out of love with him but he needed you to refall in love with him again…. But this time, the others were going to help him.
He’d make you part of the group whether you wanted it or not.
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“My dear~, Time to wake up~” Kyojuro sang as you were shaken awake, you didn’t want to deal with him. “The hell do you want?”
“All I want to do is pamper my beloved fiance, is that so wrong?” He said as he went to the end of the bed where he lifted up your feet, still healing from the cuts and massaged them. It's something he always used to do when you both woke up, he was always one to smother you with affection when you two were together. “I don’t care… go away..”
“Come now, my love, we’ve all prepared you a lovely breakfast and the girls want you to try on the wedding dresses you selected!” Wedding dresses? If you remember correctly, they did ask for your input when talking about your wedding but you refused to speak to them so they must have made the decisions on your behalf. “No, I’ll hate what they have picked out…”
“Nonsense! I gave them access to your pinterest! You know, where you gathered all your ideas for our wedding, along with some input from me! It’ll go splendidly!” 
That pissed you off. “You gave them my access to my pintrest!? I had private shit on that!” You barked.
“Don’t worry, they were utmost respectful when looking for your wedding board, they only needed what was important.” You could only scoff at his answer before looking away from him, holding in any sounds that might have given away the pleasure you were receiving from the foot massage.
“You are so beautiful, you know that? One of the most gorgeous women I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing, I knew when we first met, I had to have you, my little firelily.” The door to the room opened and in walked Mitsuri and Suma with a tray full of food. “Good morning~” The pink haired girl sang.
“See, they made this all for you- for us!” 
‘Strange’ you thought as he helped you sit up, stuffing pillows behind your head. He put out a little fold out table onto the bed, over your lap as the girls loaded everything on. Heart shaped pancakes with powdered sugar and syrup. A bowl of your favorite fruit, cut up into little pieces and a plate of sunny side up eggs, bacon, white pudding and sausage. 
Along with a cup of juice.
“We have all the dresses ready for you when you're done eating, we have at least twenty five to choose from and they’re all the types of dresses you had saved to your pinterest board!” Mitsurii sang, patting you on the head.
“Yeah, and then afterwards, we’re gonna discuss the songs you’ll have at your wedding and make the final menu.” Suma smiled before looking at Kyojuro. “I can’t wait for you two to see the venue we found, this will be your dream wedding!” 
“You two are the best!” Kyojuro gave them each a kiss on the forehead and they left the room. You look at him and pale. “Twenty five?” 
“Of course! We don’t want to force you to wear a dress you don’t like! He argued.
You ate your food in silence as he did his. There was something you wanted to ask him, but didn’t know how to say. But you decided you say it without it seeming like it was a question. “This won’t be a legal marriage, you know that, right?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been missing for a month, I have no doubt I’ve missed my exams and I’ve had no contact with my family. People should be wondering where the hell I am and when people find out what went down here, you and everyone in this house are going to jail.”
“Hahaha! Oh, my love. You really are a silly goose.” he said, rubbing your head before you knocked his hand away. “Don’t give me that fucking shit.”
“Well, your family may not have had contact with you but let me assure you, they know where you are and we have assured them you are safe. Also, don’t worry about our exams, as far at the university is aware, you and I have suffered terrible injuries from a car crash after we were hit by a drunk driver and are working toward full recoveries, they were so kind as to let us reschedule our exam dates so by the time we do them, we’ll be both mental and physically prepared!”
“What the fuck did you do…?” You growled.
“You and I both know how close our families are with one another. My mother practically sees you as the daughter she never had and your uncle and my father became business associates years ago, they’d never anything like our….. disagreement ruin things between us all. Besides, my brother Senjuro was so relieve when he found out we made up and are getting married after all-”
“You fucking prick-!” You screamed, knocking the table out of the way and jumping onto him. Food and liquid spilt as you climbed onto his lap and proceeded to strangle him as hard as you could. “Turn my entire fucking family against me?! Hide from everyone what your fuck buddies did to me?! I swear… one day- I’m going to kill you in your sleep…!”
He moaned.
He fucking moaned.
“My dear…. It was wrong of me to never allow you to experiment- I can see all your pent up frustration, One of my biggest regrets… but don’t worry-”
He easily removed your hands from his throat and looked you in the eyes. “I will give you the experience and the fantasies you’ve always wanted to do~”
He picked you up off the bed and carried you to the bathroom where he set you down in the tub. “Now, think about what you’ve done while I clean the bed up~” He turned on the shower, the water splashing on top of your head as you began to get drench. It was luke warm too.
“KYOJURO!” You screamed.
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“Ah, this is much better.” He smiled as you sat on the ground while he sat on the bed, brushing your hair, after having washed it for you, however-
“MMMMmmmmmhhhhh!”
He duct taped your mouth shut and bound your wrists together because you wouldn’t stop screaming and thrashing about. You hated him. You seriously fucking hated him. You’d get him eventually and he’d never see you coming.
“There, now, let's get you down stairs.” He pulled you up and gently pulled the tape off your mouth. “Feeling better now dear?”
“I’m gonna fuck your dead corpse with a strap on when this is all over.”
“Hahaha! What an imagination you have, my dear!” He put his hand around your waist and led you into the hallway, scanning and memorizing your surroundings. You haven’t really been in the house at all, they always kept you in the basement. You walked down the grand staircase before he led you into a large room.
“Ah! Kyojuro, (Y/n). There you guys are, we’ve been waiting for you guys to show up!” Kanae smiled as she tucked you into the lounge where Shinobu had been going through all the dresses on the rack. “And here we thought you wouldn’t be coming, busy last night?” She said, giving a suggestive look while looking at the tape on your wrists.
You always thought it was weird as fuck that two sisters were in the same polyamorous group.
“Haha! Unfortunately not, I’ll trust you girls to keep her occupied.” He pulled out a knife and cut the tape off your wrists. You rubbed them as he closed the door where you heard a loud “Click!” The bastard just locked you in here with these she devils.
“Alright then, Lets begin!” Mitsuri giggled, leading you into the center of the room where you saw Hinatsuru, Makio and Suma sitting on the lounge seats. “Ah! There she is, the woman of the hour!” Hinatsuru cheered.
You always dreamed of looking at dresses, but with your friends, your mom and other female members of your family, not these strangers… It felt wrong.
“Now, let's get started, let's start with… this one~!” Kanae said, pulling a random dress from the railing. It was a pretty dress. Definitely one you would have had an eye out for selection, but still
“Oh! That's a really cute dress! Try it on!” Makio said.
Kanae led you behind the dressing curtain where she assisted you. You slowly removed the shorts and top you wore as you slid into the dress. This particular one had long ruched sleeves so you pulled them on. Kanae buttoned up your dress. “I remember the first time Kyojuro told us about you, if only you could have seen his face, he was lit up like a lantern. He was so happy and we were so happy for him.”
“Why does he need me when he has you guys…?” You said harshly.
“W-Well… as you know. We all want to start families and what not.. But sometimes it's hard to do that with polyamory. We know its something Kyojuro has always wanted since we met, a happy marriage and kids-”
“Then why couldn’t he find someone else who was polyamorous?”
She was silent, you thought you had one, when she responded back.
“We don’t choose the ones we love. Kyojuro loves you…. That man would kill someone if you asked him to-”
“Really? What would he do if I asked him to kill one of you?” You look back at her with a disgust riddled face. “That's the thing, no matter what, you guys will always take priority in his life, not me. I very much believe you’ll take priority over any kids we have but that doesn’t matter, I’ll-!”
“That’s enough!” Kanae yelled, forcing you to turn around and face her. “He is a good man! He would never do that! Is it so hard to believe that he has enough room in his heart for all of us or are you so bitter with jealousy that you can’t stand the thought of him with another person?!”
You nearly laughed. “Well that's the thing, I don’t love him-”
“You've been with him for four years and wanted to marry him! You do love him!”
You were done with this conversation. “No, I had no idea what love is, I thought I did because all he did was shower me with special treatment. But here's the thing, Kanae. As far as I’m aware, in order for any successful marriage to work, both people in the marriage should want the same things. He wants his cake and to eat it too, I just want a man who sees me as enough.”
“Honestly, you are so bitter~” You look around to see Shinobu there with a smirk on her face, like something she was hiding for a long time. “So jealous that Kyojuro wouldn’t touch you the same way he touches us. Tell me, did it hurt your feelings knowing it was our backs he was blowing out or that we were the ones he liked to choke while he just gave you a boring missionary?”
Now that was a low fucking blow.
“Thats why I fucking broke up with him, if he couldn’t be that intimate with the woman he wanted to marry, then why the fuck did he want to marry me.”
“Because he loves you!” Kanae argued.
“You know why he didn’t touch you like he touched us…? Cause you didn’t deserve it.” Shinobu taunted.
“What the fuck is that suppose to mean?” You barked.
“All you ever did was be bitter that you couldn’t have him all to yourself, you were never grateful that he chose you to be his partner for life. We all know what you really think of us, we could see you looking at us in the corner of your eye, looking your nose down at us as if we were disgusting. The only disgusting one here is you for not being able to accept him for who he truly is.”
“Have I not?! All these years!?” You screamed, tears in your eyes. “All I did was hold myself back because I convinced myself that at the end of the day, I’m the one he wants to come home too! But it's not enough, so sorry that I seem like a bitter cunt but I deserve someone BETTER!”
“Ha! Someone better than Kyojuro? You're lucky he even looked your way.”
“If you guys want him so fucking bad then fine he’s all yours! You’re the ones who fucking kidnapped me and are forcing to me to marry him. I only wish I could go back in time and reject him when he asked me out, my life probably would have been so much better if he was never in my life!”
“(Y/n)!” Mitsuri gasped.
“You're the woman he wants, so we must respect his wishes. However, since you will be married to Kyojuro, we’ll have to train you.”
“Train me…-?!”
You were tossed onto the floor, in front of the other girls, Shinobu had a surprising strength you had not thought possible with her tiny body. “Girls, let's undress her…” Shinobu cackled.
“No! Stop!” You screamed but they all ganged on you, pulling you out of the wedding dress. “She wants to be roughhoused with, let's show her what it's like!”
You felt fingers pull your hair, a hand wrapped around your throat. You were forced on to your back as you felt someone slap your face. You were gasping for air “This is how you want him to treat you? Like a whore? You're not good enough to be his wife, you're more of a dog than anything else, begging and whining for all his attention.” She sneered.
“Probably because she’s never had the touch of many others, right? She’s just ignorant to what true love feels like!” Mitsuri boasted.
“That's right, let's give (Y/n) here all of our love~” 
They all began to undress, you were frightened, were they really going to rape you? Here?! Did Kyojuro know about this….. Did he set you up..?
Mitsuri pulled her sweater off quickly before grabbing your face. “Stop being mean to Kyojuro and accept this is your life now!” She gave you a smooch on the lips, you tried to pull away but she was ridiculously strong, her tongue invading your mouth. Your arms were seized as your legs were forced open.
“Please don’t! Don’t do this to me!” You begged, trying to free yourself from their hold but they refused to let go of you. The only face you could focus on was Shinobu who continuously glared at you with malicious intent.
“Someone bring the the box of toys, get me the largest strap on we have~”
You were mortified, your life was over. At that point, you had just given up.  You couldn’t breath, you couldn’t think. You just wanted to disappear.
Instead, you blacked out.
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Sobs, that was the only sound you woke up to as you lifted your head from the pillow. Kyojuro sat beside you on the bed and noticed you move. “Oh (Y/n)! Thank god you're awake-!”
“GET AWAY FROM ME!” You cried, falling out the bed and backing up into a corner, you were shaking, tears falling from your eyes as you grabbed a standing lamp and held it out like a weapon. “Get away! Get away from me! You monster!” You cried hysterically.
“My love, listen to me! Shinobu and the others weren’t going to hurt you! It was a joke! It went too far-”
“FUCK YOU! They tried to rape me and you set it up!” You roared.
“NO! Never, we just wanted you to understand our ways! So you could understand me-”
“NO! You don’t understand me! You never did! If you did you would have realized how unhappy I was this entire time! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! Why couldn’t you have just fucking died!?”
He froze.
“You…. You don’t mean that…. “
“My life is a living hell! I mean every word of it! I despise you so much, I would rather get with that ugly bastard, Gyutaro than spend another minute with you! You're repulsive and all your partners are self righteous narcissists!”
He smacked the lamp out of your hands and held you close. “I don’t care…. I love you… You're the reason I live and breathe…”
“I hate you…. I hate you….. I hate you…..!” You sobbed, struggling in his arms. He brought you over to the bathroom where the tub was in the process of filling up, you could smell bath salt and scented candles wafer in the room. “Please, just relax…. Take a bath while I’m gone…. But please. Just don’t do anything you’ll regret.” He locked you inside
You didn’t feel comfortable getting fully naked, no after what happened. So as the bath finished filling, you just stepped inside and sat down in your underwear. What could you do? You were literally stuck.
Between a rock and a hard place. Kyojuro and his psychopathic lovers.
What could you do? So far, you’ve been playing too carelessly… What could you do?
What happened earlier, it was so traumatic, even more so than what Akaza did to you… You were terrified…maybe.. 
Just maybe…
You can play your new found fear against him… but what could you do to make him stop these advances? Before, he avoided doing that kind of stuff with you because he only reserved it for his partners. But now, he wants to do it here, where they could all watch and here you..
You had an idea.
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“You guys went too far.” Kyojuro stated, pouring himself a glass of scotch as the girls sat in the living room. Most of them seemed kind of remorseful for their actions. Except Shinobu of course.
“We were only giving her what she wanted. Not our fault she couldn’t handle it.” She cursed.
“Shinobu, with all due respect…. What you guys did was really fucked up.” Obanai said, sitting beside Sanemi who had an arm around him, cuddling on the couch. “Yeah, like, you were supposed to go in, seduce her while making her think it's her idea to get intimate with you guys.”
“You weren’t there! She said the most awful things about Kyojuro! We were defending his honor!” Mitsuri cried, getting upset.
“Yeah, well know she thinks you guys are narcissists and she hates me even more now, she thinks I set her up to get raped, do you how bad that is?!” Kyojuro shouted, finding it hard to contain his anger. You feared him, his partners and somehow, hate him even more now.
“Kyojuro, I think we should have this conversation while sober, it's not good that you're drinking. We’ll discuss what to do in the morning.” Giyuu said, putting his hand on Kyojuro’s shoulder while gently pulling his glass away from him.
“You're right….. I’ll head in for the night… put first… I think we can all agree we owe her an apology for what went down today..” Kyojuro mumbled. He didn’t bother waiting for a response before he left the living room and headed back upstairs and unlocked your bedroom and bathroom door to find you silently crying into your knees.
“My love… it's time for bed….” He said in a defeated voice before he walked over to the closet, pulling out a nightdress and some new underwear and placing it on the bed before pulling out his own pajamas and taking his clothes off. He didn’t look at you, strip off your wet undergarments and put on you fresh clothes. The least he could do was give you some privacy after you hadn’t been afforded any over the month.
He had to find a way to fix this, he had too.
“I’ll marry you.” You said in a silent tone, but loud enough for him to hear. He whipped around, wondering if his ears were deceiving him. “A-are you serious..?” He asked. Walking over quickly and taking your hands in his.
“Yes-”
“Oh (Y/N)!” He wrapped his arms around you and cried. “I thought I had lost you for good! I’m sorry! I’ll never do anything like that again! You have my word, I’ll do better, I swear!”
“Kyojuro!” You squealed uncomfortably, signaling for him to let go of you as you gave him a shaky look. “My love?” He asked, as you slowly rubbed your arm. 
“I’ll…. Marry you…. Under one condition.”  you said nervously, like you fear what his reaction would be if you said it, but you should know by now he would never hurt you! “Oh course my beloved! Just say it and it’ll be done!” 
You took a deep breath before looking him in the eye.
“I-.... I never want to have sex again…” You said.
He felt his whole being crumble. You don’t want sex? But the reason why you broke up with him in the first place was because your sexual desires weren’t being met, now you don’t want to have sex again, full stop? “What..? B-But why..?!”
“I thought…. I wanted what you gave them…. But after today… I realized you were right..! I don’t want it! I was so scared! And now… every time I think back on when we were intimate…. I can’t see the joy or happiness in it anymore.. Sex isn’t the beautiful act we used to do when we used to convene our love to one another. It's… It's horrible.. It's dark and dirty..! I’ll never be like them… I’m- I’m weak…” You sobbed.
Kyojuro felt so broken at that moment, they only said that they stopped the minute you passed out but…. Were they lying? Did more happen in that room then what they were willing to let on? More on the fact, you were so traumatized, you no longer wanted to have sex ever again, even with the man who’s going to be your husband!
“But what about children?” He asked.
“There's always I.V.F….. I swear… I’ll carry our children myself… but please! Don’t make me go through that again Kyojuro! I’m beginning you!” You cry, crumbling to your knees and bowing your head to his feet, holding him closely as if you were his lifeline.
He hated seeing you like, you shouldn’t be at his feet, he should be at yours. He fell to his knees and held you closely. “I-I promise my love…. I’ll never hurt you again.”
All the while you smirked into his chest. 
Now this idiot believed you were so traumatized, you were gonna withhold sex from him. What kind of wife withholds sex from her husband? A Conniving one. But he won’t blame you. No. He’ll blame his so-called beloved partners who traumatized you in the first place.
You’ll blame this game. You’ll be his perfect wife. You’ll do everything to make him happy and you bide your time. Those partners of his were bound to slip up eventually and soon, Kyojuro will have to come to a decision.
You or them.
Tag list: @lickmytoesgirl @sanelilpatato @rosierose2156 @leviadarling @ledafox @spitfire759 @bookandstar @sugaremedy @zeniin @dead-fish-soup @rottencoreflesh101 @i-simp-for-giyuu
@sublieu @dragonjimin @aputura-ires @kyojuro-my-wuv @ghostlyforxst and @rose4958
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crazyk-imagine · 10 months
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Mended Relationships and the Future
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Pairing: Jamie Tartt x Fem!reader Characters: Fem!reader, Ted Lasso, Coach Beard, Keeley Jones, Jamie Tartt, Rebecca Welton, Isaac Mcadoo, Colin Hughs, Sam Obisanya, Dani Rojas, Jan Maas, Roy Kent, literally all of the players (I just can’t think of their names) Warnings: Slight angst, fluff, cursing, mentions of pregnancies, mentions of reader not taking care of themselves (don’t do this), Jamie being sweet, reader and Jamie being dummies for a second, the team being so goddamn adorable, the team gives such family vibes, Jamie pretending the reader and he are engaged so he can stay with her, Ted and Beard are a powerful duo, this is my favorite TL fic that I’ve written Word Count: 3,783
A/N: Bits and pieces are based on this post
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You walk into the coach’s office with your hands in your hoodie pocket, clutching onto your phone to keep your hands busy. "Why did you wake me up and force me here, Ted?" 
"That's not a can-do attitude." 
Your expression doesn't change, if anything, you look more tired and drained. Another reason why the mustached man got you out of your home. "Ted." 
He sighs. "I wanted to check in on you, haven't seen you in a minute." 
You sigh. "I would prefer it if I were in my bed right now to be honest with you." 
"After we go out to lunch." 
"I want to be out of here before I run into..." You pause when you almost say his name. "You know what- I'm just- I’m gonna go." You barely turn around and hear the door open. 
It takes you less than a second to duck, which makes Ted feel a little bad but doesn't change his mind. 
He knows you two need to talk, especially when neither of you want to admit who broke up with who... or why it happened. 
Your emotions take a toll on your body again and you crawl towards the trash can, dry heaving until you feel it coming up (again). 
Beard kindly closes the door before anyone could walk in or hear you as Ted rubs the space between your shoulders. 
"How long have you been feeling like this?" 
You shrug. 
"How long?" He asks again. 
"A few weeks." 
Ted glances over at his long-time buddy with wide eyes. "Please don't get upset or take offense when I ask this but have you-" 
'Play dumb. Play dumb.' "Have I what? Use words, my brain isn't functioning off your noises." 
"Is there a possibility that you could be, you know, with child?" 
Your head snaps up. 'He knows.' "Why would you ask that?" 
"You have a few of the signs." 
"When was the last time you went to a doctor?" Beard chimes in. 
"A while ago." 
"So, you know?" 
"Whether or not I'm pregnant with my ex-boyfriend’s baby, who coincidentally told me he doesn't want kids just as I wanted to tell him I do. Yeah, it was right as I was about to tell him I am with child, which is why I've been dodging all of you but you and Beard here," you point to Ted's sidekick, who waves. "Dragged me out of my house." 
"Oh, honey." 
"Does he know?" Coach beard intervenes (again). 
"What do you mean?" 
"You said, you wanted to tell him... did you?" Ted politely asks. 
"He broke up with me, so I didn't give him my surprise, but I tell people it was mutual because he asked me if," the tears roll down your cheeks. "If it was okay. The fucking ex-cockiest player of all, asked me if I was going to be okay, so of course I said yes and then he left. We haven't spoken since." 
"He should know." 
"I know but he is scared to death to have his own kids. Why would I-" You scoot back and rest your head against the wall. "I want to go home. I have a few things coming later today and I need to be there for them. It’s time I start," you take a deep breath. “Getting things ready.” 
"We can get those later, I've gotta make sure you're okay right now." 
"I'd be better if this nausea, vomiting combo would go away." 
"Do you want me to have Keeley get you a ginger ale or something?" 
"Yeah." 
The door opens and there she is. She stares at you with the same look she gives you every time you throw up. "I had a feeling you were going to need this." 
-
Jamie sees what he imagines is a glimpse of you sitting in his coach’s office. He furrows his brows, wondering if it was really, you or if it's a figment of his imagination... again. 
It wouldn’t be the first time this week. 
-
"What?" She practically screams when Ted tells her on behalf of you, the Jamie not knowing part; she already knew you were pregnant, but she thought he knew and decided not to be in either of your lives. Now she feels a little bad about not being nice to him. 
You bury your head in your hands. "Shut up. Don't shout anymore, please." 
"Can you blame me? That's big fucking news babes. I thought he already knew." 
"Yeah, I know. Just, shut the door please." 
She doesn't, so you push yourself up and close the door. 
You sway as you take a step back, “oh, boy.” You can hear their voices but not hear their words. You feel yourself falling backwards before it fades to darkness. 
Ted and Beard catch you, carefully laying you down so the latter can call for an ambulance. 
Jamie steps closer to the office, sensing something’s happened. He opens the door and his jaw dropped as he’s about to ask what's going on until his eyes land on you. 
He immediately falls to his knees beside you, holding your face in his hands, not caring about the rug burn that’s going to ache later. "What happened?" 
No one responds. 
"What fucking happened?" 
Ted doesn't feel he should be the one to tell him and does all that he can to try and calm down his player. "She's fine, she probably didn't have enough to eat for breakfast, is all." 
"Bullshit. She's done that before and never fainted before." He stares down, studying your face. "So, why is she fucking unconscious?" 
-
You don't know anything that happened within the last few hours. 
All you know is that there is an annoying beeping sound coming from the side of you and your one hand is warmer than it normally is. 
You slowly open your eyes, blinking multiple times as you try to adjust to the lighting. You look for the source of the warmth and find Jamie, holding your hand with his head rested on his arm with his head facing you. 
The door opens and you find Ted peaking in. 
The way his shoulder sags in relief makes you feel bad. 
He tiptoes closer and lets you know what happened. 
"Why is he here?" 
He smiles as he peaks over at the sleepy man. "He didn't leave your side." 
"How did he know?" 
"He came in as we were calling for an ambulance. You scared him, he would barely let the paramedics help." 
"Isn't family only allowed in here?" 
"Apparently you two are engaged." 
You owlishly blink. "What?" 
"He said you two were engaged and he needed, no, no. That's not right, he demanded, there it is. He demanded to be in the room with you. I wasn't here for most of it. In the room I mean but I think he knows because he looked very shocked and then came in here when they told him he could and hasn’t left since." 
The coach ignores the fact that your heart monitor spikes as you ask, "he knows?" 
"I think so." 
Jamie moves a little in his sleep. 
"That's my cue to leave." 
"Wait- no. Ted. Come back." You glance between him and Jamie. "Ted," you hiss. "Come back here." 
Jamie squeezes your hand as he slowly begins to wake up. 
You look back at him just in time to hear the door close. You throw your head back and sigh. 
"Sweetheart?" 
You slowly turn your head to stare at him, your eyes becoming sad. 
His shoulders sag in relief as a slow sigh escapes his parted lips. "How are you feeling? I should- I should go get the doctor, shouldn't I?" 
You reach for him, grabbing onto him before he could leave. "Jaim. Jaim?" 
He doesn't turn around but settles back into his seat. 
"Jam-Jam?" 
A sniffle fills the room. 
"Jamie, look at me." 
He shakes his head. You tighten your grip on his arm, ignoring the familiar burning sensation in your nose. "Jamie, I need you to look at me." 
"Why?" He sniffles, staring at you with his now, bloodshot eyes. "Were you ever going to tell me?" 
"Don't throw that question my way, Tartt." 
"No more, Jam-Jam?" 
"I was going to tell you." 
"What? After the birth?" 
"I'm more tempted to now." You wipe the stray tear that tipped past your eye lid before he could see. "I initially planned on telling you right when you broke up with me but, we see how well that turned out." 
“Wh- is that what you had been trying to do the whole time?” 
You nod and lean forward, drawing him into you; needing to comfort him and be comforted all at once. 
He moves closer to you, closing his eyes at the feeling of your hand against his face; something he hasn’t felt in what feels like, forever. He hadn’t realized you were wiping away his tears. 
“I wanted to figure out the best way to tell you because, I mean we hadn’t exactly talked about us having kids before and I kind of figured that with everything that went on with your dad. I thought it was going to make it hard for you to think that you could be a good dad. Which, I think is stupid.” 
He opens his mouth to ask what you mean until you continue. 
“I mean, how could you not be a good dad because personally I think you’d be absolutely fucking phenomenal.” 
“Yeah?” 
You nod, “big time. You’re already doing better than your dad.” 
“What do you mean?” 
You smile and sniff. “You’re not making any of the stupid decisions he has.” 
“I made one.” 
You tilt your head. “What was that?” 
“I broke up with you. I just-” He pulls back from you (something he does when he feels like he’s undeserving of something). “I thought- I thought you were pulling away to break up with me and you couldn’t figure out how to do it, so I-” 
“So, you thought breaking up with me first, was a better option?” 
He nods, scratching his head. 
“Come closer.” 
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he weakly argues. 
“Come here.” 
He scoots the chair closer. 
“I need you to be honest with me when I ask these questions, okay?” 
He nods. 
You sigh through your nose and reach for his hand. “Is there any part of you that does not want to be a part of either of our lives?” 
“No.” 
“Do you want to be with me?” 
“Yes.” 
“Are you going to leave any time soon?” 
“The fuck do you take me for? I’m not going to leave you ever,” he stands up and bends down, staring into your eyes before leaning down to kiss you. “Okay? I love you too fucking much to let you go again. I hated being away from you.” 
“Same here but, I’m really happy you’re here… even if it was because I fainted.” 
“Speaking of, why did that happen exactly?” 
“I- well- I hadn’t had anything-” 
“Let’s just cut the bullshit, have you been taking proper care of yourself since we were separated?” 
You shamefully shake your head. 
He doesn’t show his disappointment, but you know it’s there. 
“I’m sorry,” you sniffle. 
“Hey, hey. Don’t cry. Isn’t that- crying is stressful on the baby, ain’t it?” 
“Not so much- I mean, maybe?” 
“Okay, well.” He grabs your hands, bringing your attention to him. “Let’s take a few deep breathes so we can calm down for Baby Tartt.” You can’t help but chuckle. “Do do do doo.” 
“Listen to you. Guess I rubbed off on you, eh?” You roll your eyes, not believing that for a second. “Does any of what you’ve said within the last two minutes sound anything like what your dad could say?” 
“Not in the least bit.” 
“See, exactly. It further proves you’re different and how much you’ve grown from the cocky man who couldn’t care less about anyone else.” 
“Hey. That’s someone we don’t speak of.” 
“Of course,” you salute him. You two can barely keep your amusement to yourselves and break into a fit of smiles and giggles. 
He stares at you, watching as you wipe your cheeks and leans up, kissing your forehead before placing his on top of your head. “I was,” he hesitates to finish his sentence. 
You nod and cup his cheek, letting him know you’re there, a simple gesture to let him know you want to hear what he has to say. 
“-so scared when I saw you lying there unconscious.” 
Your heart drops at the way his voice cracks. “Jaim. Jaim. Look at me.” 
He shakes his head. 
You don’t push any further and instead opt for bringing him closer, letting him rest against your chest, squeezing you in a hug. 
It takes a few minutes before Jamie manages to calm himself down enough to revert back to your adorable boyfriend. “Oh, shit. I didn’t hurt the baby, did I?” He asks, now scared to touch you. 
“No. You didn’t.” 
You hold out your hand for him, “do you trust me?” 
He nods, “’course I do.” 
“Give me your hand.” 
He slowly inches his hand closer and closer to you. 
You huff and reach for him. “Are you ready?” 
He doesn’t move or make a noise as you place his hand over your belly. “Am I supposed to be feeling anything?” 
“Other than knowing the fact you are going to be a father soon enough, no. I’m not that far along for us to feel any kicking.” 
He bends down as a breath of relief escapes him. “Thank god, I thought I was supposed to feel kicking or something and I didn’t, which scared me the hell out of me because I thought he already hated me.” 
“He?” 
“I mean, hello,” he gestures to himself. You roll your eyes and take your hand back from him. “You’re so going to be cursed with girls.” “How can you say that?” 
“Have you met yourself?” 
“I have and we’re actually quite happy together, sorry for the late notice, sweetheart.” 
You close your eyes and let out a dramatic sigh. 
Ted peaks his head in through the door. “I see you two have talked things out? Hopefully, if not. No pressure. Well, maybe a little seeing as I have everyone waiting in the hall.” 
“Everyone?” You repeat. 
The coach nods. “Give me second.” He looks back over his shoulder, pretending to count, “one, two, four. Yep, everyone.” 
You place your hand on your forehead. “Suddenly the thought of everyone knowing makes me nauseous.” 
“Hey, hey. Look at me.” 
You turn your head and look at your favorite person ever… for now. 
“If we can get through the team being little shits and the press making unnecessary comments about our relationship, we can get through the team knowing.” 
“We can?” He gives you an affirmative nod, “we can.” 
“We can.” 
“Atta girl.” 
“Alright, guys. They said okay,” Ted waves everyone in. 
“I suddenly realize how many of you there actually are,” you comment. 
Sam, Dani, and Colin chuckled. 
“As captain, I feel like it’s my duty to ask,” Isaac leans closer to you, talking to you in a softer tone than his normal one. “How are you?” 
You smile, “I’m better now.” 
“Good, that’s what we like to hear. Ain’t that right, team?” 
“Yes, coach!” 
“And now I’m scared.” 
“Oh, don’t be scared especially when you’re carrying a special bundle of joy,” the mustached man points out. 
“Oh fuck.” 
“Something the matter, Roy?” Ted asks. 
“Yeah. She’s carrying Tartt’s baby.” 
“I’m pretty sure they covered that topic back in school but continue.” 
“There’s going to be a baby brought into the world soon.” 
“Yeah?” Ted glances over at Beard, who shrugs. 
“With his blood coursing through its veins,” he points to your ex-not-ex-boyfriend. 
It’s quiet for three seconds before everyone groans and rolls their eyes, they think about what it could be like with a baby Jamie. 
“Hey, hey now. Let’s not think about something as crazy as that because this baby is a good thing.” 
“Yeah?” Jamie whispers, glancing back at Ted, not letting go of your hand. 
“Yes, it is,” the coach nods. “You’re going to go through one of the many joys life brings you.” 
“What’s that?” 
“Fatherhood… that, may or may not mix with a lot of uncles and two aunts who decide they want to spend time with the little booger.” 
“Would one of those many figures happen to include you, coach?” 
“No,” Ted shakes his head. 
“Not at all, Beard.” 
The door opens and heads turn. 
“Hi, I’m just here to-” The nurse takes note of the number of people in the room. “I’m sorry but I’m going to have to ask anyone but the father and mother of the child to leave.” 
“Is it not believable that a woman could have this many boyfriends?” Jan asks. 
“Shut up.” A shoe aimed at his head, hits the wall and lands on the floor with a thud. 
The guys decide it’s time for them to leave, which lets you two see the few things the team has gotten, and it makes you tear up, freaking Jamie out. 
And he doesn’t want to admit it out loud, but it was really nice of them team to do. 
“Should we open some presents?” Ted softly asks, placing one in your lap. 
“Didn’t the nurse just kick you out.” 
“I’m your dad.”
 “We’re your dads,” Beard adds. 
You glance over at Jamie. 
He shrugs, not completely hating the idea of having these two around. “I would’ve liked to know about my new parents beforehand. What’s next? Roy’s my uncle.” 
“No, he’s a granddad more than anything,” Jamie chimes in. 
You wipe your cheeks and smile at him before gently pulling the tissue paper out of your way. You pull out a onesie that looks normal, until you unfold it and inspect it. You sniffle as you hold it up for Jamie to see. 
He doesn’t realize why you’re crying until he reads what the back of it, “Tartt 9”. He doesn’t feel the tears trickling down his cheeks until you wipe his cheeks. 
“Jaim?” 
He shakes his head and pulls you in for a hug, kissing the top of your head, over and over again. 
Ted smiles behind his phone. 
“We should probably give them some time alone.” 
“You think?” He asks. 
Beard nods. 
Ted sighs, “okie dokie.” 
They hold their hands up to wave, only to find your face squished against Jamie’s chest, barely able to wave them off. 
You and Jamie wind up opening every one of the other gifts, enjoying each other’s company after being apart for so long. 
“I think we should name it Jamie.” 
“Baby Tartt is not an it, it’s a baby,” you argue. 
“And we’re not naming them Jamie.” 
“Why not? It’s a good name.” 
“I’m not saying it’s a bad name but, we want our little pumpkin to be able to grow into their own, right?” 
“We-” He sighs, thinking about it, already knowing you were right. “Yeah.” 
“Good.” 
“Was that everything?” 
“I don’t know.” He glances over, finding a bag left on the floor, partially hidden so you couldn’t find it unless you were really looking. He grabs it and sets it in your lap. “What do you think it is?” 
“I don’t know,” you shrug and move it closer for him to open (feeling you’ve done enough of the unveiling with presents). 
He pulls a figure out of the bag. “A bike?” Jamie brows furrows together in confusion until he thinks about it. The light bulb goes off in his head, everything clicking together, and he smiles. 
“Is there a card?” 
“I hope so.” 
Now you’re confused. 
He pulls out what looks like a plain index card. “Free one learn how to ride a bike pass.” He chuckles. 
“I’m lost.” 
“Remember how I told you I had something funny I wanted to tell you a couple months ago, but I couldn’t because the shithead was making me train, even though Ted gave us the night off.” He huffs and sits back in the chair. 
“Okay, I don’t need the background information, just give me the synopsis.” 
“Right,” he straightens his back. “I taught Roy how to ride a bike in memory of his granddad.” 
“You did?” 
“Yeah,” he nods with a smile. 
“And he let you?” 
“Not without trying to hurt me but I did it.” 
“I’m so proud of you.” 
“Yea- really?” 
“Of course, I’m proud of you. You taught the world’s grumpiest man how to ride a bike and lived to tell the tale.” 
“I guess you’re right.” 
“Of course, I’m right.” 
“I hope the baby doesn’t get your cockiness.”
“My cockiness? What about yours?” 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, sweetheart.” 
“You lie.” 
He fake gasps and slaps his hand on his chest. “I take offense to that.” 
“I’m not sorry.” 
“You should be. We don’t want this one’s first word to be a lie.”
“It wouldn’t, don’t be mean,” you whine. 
“I’m not. I’m just being me.” 
“Yeah, and that’s mean.” 
He smiles and shakes his head. 
You start folding a few of the blankets the guys got, feeling the need to do something. “Hey, look. They got one with sharks.” 
“We don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl.” 
“Girls can like boy things too.” 
“Do you really want to be asked if we have a boy or a girl every day.” 
“Don’t be mean.” You smile, holding it close to your chest. “I like it. Baby Tartt, do do doo doo. Baby Tart, do do doo doo.” 
He groans, “please stop.” 
“Never.” 
You stiffle a yawn. 
“Come on,” he takes away the few things on your lap and blanket from your hands. “You need to rest.” 
“But I don’t want to.” 
He smiles at the whining tone in your voice. “I know but it’ll do the two of you well.” 
“Fine,” you tell him with a pout. “But sit by me. I… I’ve missed you.” 
“How can I say no to my girlfriend?” Jamie settles beside you and lets you lay against his chest. 
As you sleep and he’s bored, searching through the hospital’s shitty channels, he stumbles upon something interesting, an old childhood show he used to watch. 
You open your eyes to hear the song you briefly sang earlier. 
“Doo doo. Baby Tartt, do do doo doo.” 
“Jam-Jam?” 
“Hey,” he clears his throat. “How are you feeling?” 
“Better. What were you doing?” 
He shrugs. 
You smile and snuggle back into him. “I won’t tell anyone.”
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quite-right-too · 4 months
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Bitter Taste
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Dark!Tenth Doctor x GN!Reader / requests are open
Summary: When the Doctor meets your ex-boyfriend, he reacts in a way you really should have expected.
His name was Jason.
You didn’t tell the Doctor much about your ex-boyfriend. Mostly little details regarding his treatment of you. Not that he was necessarily a bad guy, just that he was pretty distant and cheated on you with some girl he’d met at a bar one night during his shift.
Yet, here you were. Standing directly in front of the bar where he worked, hand in hand with the Doctor.
“It’ll be fun,” he said when he’d mentioned a visit home to see your family. “I can see little bits of your past.” You knew the real reason he wanted to go to Brook’s. It was just a shitty little dive bar in your city, nothing special — aside from the fact that he knew your ex worked there.
He reached for the handle, opening the door for you and pulling you in. His eyes scanned the faces of everyone in the room, keeping his hand in yours while doing so. “Why don’t you go get us some drinks?” he murmured, leaning down so his breath puffed against your ear. “I’m going to the loo.” And off he went, walking to the back where the sign for the restrooms was.
At the bar, the bartender walked up. “Welcome to Brook’s, what can I get you?” She had a nice smile — genuine and kind. You couldn’t help but smile back.
“I’ll take a-” You couldn’t even finish your order before you locked eyes with the other bartender. Piercing blue eyes bore deep into your soul as you felt a sense of dread in the pit of your stomach. He set down the glass he had been drying and began to walk to your side of the bar.
“Oh, hey! It’s been a while. Fancy seeing you here,” Jason chuckled. “I'll be right back, Jess.” He placed his hand on the woman’s shoulder and walked around the bar to be at your side. “How have you been?”
“Hello, Jason,” you spat. “I’ve been busy. Travelling, you know?” 
He reached out, grabbing your arm before you could move and pulling the two of you into the corner. “I’ve missed you. A lot, actually.” Your arm was stuck in a vice grip as he continued. “I tried to call but you never answered. I want to talk. I want us to be an us again. I’m sorry and I’ve changed, I swear.”
Yanking yourself away from him, you took a step back. “Thanks, but no thanks. You cheated on me, remember? You can’t just play the ‘sorry’ card and think you’re still welcome in my life!”
“Oh please, you miss me. I know you do.”
“I really don’t. Fuck off and find someone else who will entertain your bullshit.” Swallowing hard, you moved away from the bar and glanced nervously towards the bathroom. The familiar shape of the Doctor emerged through the doorway and looked around until he spotted you.
It was like he sensed it. The Doctor’s eyes narrowed as he pushed his way through the crowd. The Time Lord Victorious did not appreciate Jason talking to you, especially after what he had heard about him.
Standing next to you, his hand gripped your waist hard, pulling you against him possesively. “Sorry, love. Just needed a minute.” His cold gaze looked Jason up and down. “I don’t believe we’ve met.”
You ex didn’t flinch. “No, we haven’t. I’m Jason,” he hissed, holding out his hand. The Doctor reached out and gripped it with a strength Jason wasn’t expecting, smirking at the wince he pulled from the other man.
“While I do love a good chat, I’m afraid we’ve got to grab something to drink and actually enjoy our night.” His comment caused Jason to scowl, backing away. “Nice to meet you.” His tone was anything but friendly as he released you and took a step forward. His fist clenched in the front of Jason’s shirt, yanking him to the side and slamming him against the wall. “And don’t you ever think about fucking coming near us again, got it? Otherwise your brains will be splattered across the concrete outside.” He released his grip, letting the other man move again.
“Sure, whatever.” Jason huffed, brushing himself off, and made his way back to the bar.
You turned, burying your face in the Doctor’s chest. “Thank you.”
He held you close, not taking his eyes off the man he had just chased away. “I’ll always save you. You’re mine.”
Not long after, he grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the bathrooms. “Where are we going?” you questioned. He didn’t say a word, continuing on through the back door and into the area behind the bar.
It wasn’t anything special. Just an area where they had some tables for large parties. However, since nobody in their right mind would use a bar like this for a gathering, it was just used by the employees for smoke breaks.
The Doctor dragged you over to a table on the end of the line, but still close enough to the back door that there was a chance of being caught. “Mine,” he growled against your lips as he kissed you greedily, lifting you by the backs of your thighs onto the edge of the table.
“Fuck, Doctor, what if we-” You didn’t get a chance to finish before he was grabbing at your waistband, forcefully ripping your jeans down your legs. The realisation hit that he was going to take you right here, right now.
You had no intention of stopping him.
As soon as you were naked from the waist down, you reached for the buttons of his trousers. He slapped your hands away, glaring at you from above. This was not the Doctor, this was the Oncoming Storm. Rough and reckless; a man who will fuck you until you can’t stand.
“No touch.” He reached for his tie, keeping his eyes connected to yours with a searing gaze. Pupils blown with lust, the Doctor pulled his tie off his neck and reached for your arms. “Now you get to be punished.” Your hands were quickly bound behind your back.
His trousers dropped to his ankles as he pulled you against the edge of the table and wasted no time slamming into you. “Oh, fuck!” you moaned as he began to set a punishing rhythm. One of his arms wrapped around your torso, the other around the back of your head, to keep you as close to him as he physically could.
“All mine,” he grunted as he kept his fast pace. “Nobody else’s. This is all for me. Mine to use. Mine to ruin.” His babbling continued as he fucked into you. “If anyone ever tries to flirt with you again, I’ll rip their heart out with my bare hands. I will make sure you never want anyone else’s cock in you for as long as you live.” He nipped at your neck, claiming you further.
Your arms fought against his tie as you tightened your legs around his waist, rotating your hips to spur him on further. “All yours. Please, use me,” you choked out. When like this, the Doctor was absolutely ruthless. It was almost as if you could see delirium swirling in those deep brown eyes of his. “Oh, god.”
“That’s it,” the Doctor snarled. “I’m your god.” He kept on for several minutes before you felt him look up and his jaw tense against your temple.
“Moan my name, love. Let the world hear whose you are. Make sure that bastard knows that it’s only me in your mind. Do it. Moan for me. Come for me.”
He released your torso, allowing you to fall backwards onto the table. His hands moved to grip your hips tightly. “Oh god, Doctor. I’m yours! I’m all yours, Doctor. Please, I’m so close!”
Your eyes met his as a sickening grin crossed his face. “Come for me, now,” he growled before he glanced up. 
It crashed over you like a star exploding. “Fuck, I’m coming! Doctor! Doctor!” You chanted his name like a prayer. As you were pulled into absolute pleasure, your back arched and you finally realised what he had been staring at.
Standing frozen outside the employee door was your ex-boyfriend, eyes wide and cigarette hanging out of his mouth as he watched the Doctor absolutely rail you.
The Time Lord staked his claim, all right. Especially as he locked eyes with Jason, sneering at him. “All mine,” he shouted as his thrusts became choppy. “This is all mine!” He tensed up, thrusting hard into you once more before you felt him pulse inside you.
The door slammed shut as you laid there, unable to move as the Doctor pulled out of you. “Now,” he murmured as he pulled his trousers up and rebuttoned them. “You’re going to put your pants back on and we’re going to walk back through that bar, in front of him, and go home. Got it?”
You nodded as he pulled the tie from its knot and freed your arms. This wasn’t what you’d planned when he suggested the possibility of seeing your ex at his place of work, but it was singlehandedly the most satisfying thing you’d done as revenge. And the best part?
As you left and turned down the alley around the corner to enter the TARDIS, the Doctor told you to stay there and said he would be right back. He reassured you that he would make sure he left Jason a nice tip.
It didn’t take long before your phone rang. Your mom informed you that your ex-boyfriend was found dead behind the bar. Beaten bloody until his brain haemorrhaged. No evidence as the cameras inside had been mysteriously deactivated.
A nice tip indeed.
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nburkhardt · 7 months
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This is something that hasn’t left me since I read a fic from fucking glee years ago. It’s haunting me and goes away only to come back and swirl in my head so I’m just gonna write it out.
Saying this now, i remember a lot of season 4 but I’ve blocked out the Stancy parts hahaha so it’s not completely accurate to the show I don’t think. Also a quick heads up, I skip a lot of what happens in the show because it’s taking up too much brain power remembering those things lol (ps: if you see typos, no you don’t)
~
“I always pictured you, just, wanted to let you know before we head straight into danger”
Something inside of her wants to break and yet all she can do is nod at him and immediately head into that danger. Not wanting to look to closely at it right now, there’s more important things going on right now.
Takes her shotgun and decides she’s ending this once and for all.
It feels like an eternity passes before she finds herself in the hospital. One second she’s ruining her eardrums using the shotgun right next to her face, the next she’s following the emt’s light.
Surprisingly all of them has made it, she doesn’t know how but they have. It’s all she knows, couldn’t hear properly and too out of it to really follow anyone anyway.
“-eler, ms? Hello, Ms. Wheeler? Can you hear me?”
Nancy blinks hard and looks around to find a nurse standing next to her, “oh, sorry. What did you say?”
The nurse smiles softly at her before shaking her head, “I was asking if you wanted to call your parents now? Our generator finally kicked in and we’ve already asked your friends”
That makes her blink again, her ears still somewhat ringing, “yeah- yeah! I’ll, um, do that”
The call with her mom she barely hears, but she knows that they’re on their way. As she hangs up the phone she looks around and doesn’t see any of her friends, it makes her nervous.
“Hey, where are my friends?” She asks the same nurse and catches her surprised look, “did- you already told me didn’t you?”
The nod is enough but the nurse still says, “Yes, two of them got admitted, the other two are in there with them. They didn’t want to be separated so they’re in room 130, just over there”
She knocks once before opening it to find what she expected, Steve in one bed with Robin clinging to him and Eddie on the other with Dustin sitting next to him.
It shouldn’t be surprising but it is.
“Nance! Heyyyyyy, welcome to the party!”
Robin snorts, “don’t mind the Dingus Duo, the doctors gave them some strong medicine for the bites”
She shakes her head, smiling just a little at them. Steve’s mumbling about Robin ruining the party, Dustin’s laughing and Eddie has his eyes closed either falling asleep or already there. She takes a seat on the extra chair, opens her mouth but lost her words. The room is filled with beeping, Steve and Robin whispering and Eddie snoring.
It’s nice, this is nice.
A pleasant change from the chaos they went through just hours ago.
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Seeing Jonathan is amazing, he pulls her close and presses a kiss to her forehead. Her arms are wrapped around him and she can’t stop the tears from falling even if it’s a happy moment.
Because it is, actually seeing him in person and not just hearing his voice.
He holds her close and it feels great, it does. But there’s Steve’s words echoing in her head. It makes her hide her face in hopes to cancel them out, she’s with her boyfriend. The boy she loves with all her heart, and yet, yet she’s thinking of the one she broke at sixteen.
Those words swirl, rattle and settles in her head as she helps fix the cabin up. They burn when Jonathan jokes about Steve being in charge, she huffs a laugh but disagrees.
She sees the confusion on Jonathan’s face. That doesn’t surprise her. Instead of continuing, they’re interrupted.
Seeing Joyce and all of the Byers reunite brightens the moment of confusion, seeing Hopper is a massive shock but a welcomed one.
Fixing the cabin is a process, but with the actual adults back, they decide to stop for the day and make their way home.
She watches as Mike clings to El and Will, watches as Joyce holds Hopper’s hand in a death grips. Sees Jonathan hovering and she’s on the outside.
There’s those words making her stay on the outside.
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There’s static in her ears, her vision blurry, heart beating fast and she can’t figure out what happened. How did this happen? They were fine, Jonathan promised. She promised.
“I’m really sorry, Nance. I just can’t be in a relationship anymore, I love you. I do, but my family needs me and I, I need them more. You have to understand” he’s holding her close and she can feel his tears fall onto her, “I won’t ask you to wait, you deserve someone who’ll love and focus on you.”
All she can do is nod as tears go down her face.
They share one last kiss before separating for good. He hugs her close and she squeezes her eyes shut.
It’s several hours later, having spent most of the day in a haze. She’s sitting at her desk, trying to get her focus back, when those words from months ago start to swirl back in.
“I always pictured you, just, wanted to let you know before we head straight into danger”
“-just travel across the country, with my family”and “always dreamt this” filters in with it, she doesn’t know what she’s feeling, she shouldn’t be thinking about her first boyfriend like this.
Jonathan just broke up with her, not even a full twenty four hours yet.
But the words are swirling fast and she can feel her stomach flutter suddenly remembering that feeling those emotions Steve used to give her.
It was nice, even if sometimes she had to be away from him. He did treat her like she was his world and it felt like it. Nancy goes to sleep with a plan set in mind.
Tomorrow, she’ll go to Steve’s and hope he still wants that second chance.
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Dressed in her best clothes, wearing pretty make-up, she makes her way to the Harrington house.
Seeing Eddie’s van parked outside doesn’t surprise her, not really, what does make her pause is when she walks by a bike and skateboard on the porch.
Seeing that makes her doubt the timing, Eddie there is alright he shouldn’t know the history between her and Steve. She also swears she heard him talking Steve about lost loves and second chances.
The bike can only be owned by Dustin and he definitely knows the history and Max well, since Spring Break, has been particularly living with Steve at this point. Stating a number of times that Steve is her brother, she might not know the story but she’ll be questioning.
But she’s here now and Steve’s words are on fire in her head.
So, she moves ahead determined. She knocks on the door and takes a few deep breaths to get her composure.
The door opens and it’s not Steve answering, it’s Dustin and she blinks. Losing that composure she just gained, it’s quick and she’s quick to get it back with an easy smile. “Hi Dustin, can I come in?”
He’s been hanging out with Eddie too much lately, since he is loose with his posture now and opens the door with an exaggerated smile and waving his arm as he opens the door more.
“Nancy?”
She looks around, sitting on the couch is Max who’s got an eyebrow raise and frown.
“Hi Max, I wanted to speak with Steve. What’re you doing here?”
Both of them shrug and Dustin moves to sit next to Max, “We have plans with Steve and Eddie, we got tired of waiting outside”
“So we broke in”
She rolls her eyes, moves to stand closer to the stairs, “Are they awake? Where is Eddie?”
The two share a look and she can’t figure out what it means, Dustin has a mischievous smile once he’s looking back towards her, “Upstairs”
A little suspicious at the look, but the words in her head has her pushing forward despite the alarm bells ringing that something is up.
Steve’s house has changed since the last time she was here, there’s more life within it and old family portraits are gone, photos of friends in their places instead. There’s a door with a sign saying ‘Dustin’s room’ on it, and she passes an open door that was originally Steve’s. It’s cleared out except for the desk and the plaid wallpaper.
The next room is opened just a bit, she itches closer and pushes the door to see more and her whole body freezes.
There on the bed is not only Steve but Eddie too. From where she’s standing, Eddie’s pressed up against Steve’s back and has an arm around him; keeping him close.
She tears her eyes away from them and immediately regrets it.
On the floor is a mix of Steve’s clothes and Eddie’s, that’s not it though. Sitting directly next to bed is ripped condom packaging and by the trash bin is a poor attempt at throwing away a used condom.
It brings her attention back to the bed, in the short glance away, Steve has moved in his sleep. Instead of facing away; he’s now facing Eddie and nearly on top of the other. She tenses up as Eddie tightens his arms around Steve, then she pulls the door shut before moving quickly down the stairs.
Without acknowledging the two on the couch she makes it to the door, just as she pulls it open the door she’s stopped.
“They’re asleep still? We could tell Steve you stopped by” she can just hear smugness coming from Dustin and Max sniggering.
Shaking her head, she refuses to look back at them, “no, no, it’s fine. Have uh, have a good day!”
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“It doesn’t make sense! I, I thought- he” Nancy mumbles to herself, trying to collect her thoughts. She didn’t even bother moving yet, still sitting inside her car mumbling and trying to figure this out.
She could’ve sworn Steve was flirting with her, she knows she was a little during the fight. It felt natural and right. Even though it was wrong, very wrong. But- it was potentially the end of the world, they could’ve died! Everyone involved would understand her lapse of judgment.
Steve had told her, admitted his dream with her in it.
Him and Eddie? Steve likes boys? Since when? Was- was it a lie then? Was she being led on? Maybe even being used?
She’s so in her head, she doesn’t notice anyone walk up and only realizes when her whole body jolts at the knocking on her window. Shaking her head and reaching for her glove box, looking over her eyes widen at Steve standing there.
He’s wearing sweatpants with only a jacket over his bare chest, he looks worried, confused and most importantly; scared.
Taking a breath, she rolls her window down before looking at him, “Steve, hi.”
“Nancy, what are you doing here?”
Frowning, she looks away from him and startles at seeing Eddie standing there by the door also looking scared. Her eyes must be wide, because Steve clears his throat and she immediately looks back at him. “I- I”
Steve sighs, dropping his arms to run a hand over his face and hair, looking away from her, “Nancy, what you saw- you can’t tell anyone. Okay? Please. I don’t understand why you’re here right now and I really don’t want to know rig-” he shakes his head, “just, please don’t tell anyone”
She opens her mouth, but the words get caught. Steve’s look is haunted, even more afraid then a few months ago. Closing her mouth, taking another look at Eddie by the door before focusing her attention back on Steve.
“I won’t. I promise, Steve. I won’t tell anyone, just- maybe we can talk sometime? All of us?”
He clearly wasn’t expecting that, she can tell by his eyes and how he glances behind him, before looking at her again. “I’ll have to talk with Eddie first, but, uh yeah sure.”
Steve gives a weak smile at her that she tries to match, despite her racing thoughts. He steps away from the car and she starts it, nodding her head before driving away. She watches in her rear view mirror as Steve walks over to Eddie and only squeezes his arm before leading him inside.
Imagines that once inside, Steve pulls Eddie close and holds him tight.
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Three Days Later
It wasn’t avoiding them, she really wasn’t. She had to collect her thoughts, really figure out what she absolutely wanted in life now.
Which, she still doesn’t know, at least relationship wise.
Thinking back on the last few years and how they’re finally no longer fighting for their lives and the world, she can go for her dream of becoming a journalist. Which is exactly what she realizes, two days into her thinking, that’s what she actually wants in life. Not a relationship with Steve. Not even a relationship with Jonathan at this point, she doesn’t need that right now.
By the third day, she realizes how selfish she was acting and how much she actually scared, maybe even hurt Steve and Eddie.
That’s what brings her back to Steve’s front door with an apology and some cookies. There’s no bikes or skateboards this time around, just Eddie’s van and it’s not first thing in the morning.
Knocking on the door is quick and as she wants gets her composure and tries to relax. It’s not long before the door opens, Steve standing on the other side and her mind flashes back to the night in 83. Shaking her head to get rid of it, smiling she raises her hands up with the plate.
“I bought cookies”
Steve smiles a little and let’s her in, “you didn’t have to, Robs and I had a baking spree last night”
“Yeah and it’s all delicious!” Eddie shouts out, from somewhere.
It does some a little like a bakery in here, she notices. Placing the plate on the table before looking at Steve, “no, my mom insisted I bring them.”
Steve just nods as he closes the door, “It’s fine, we love cookies and if we don’t finish them, Eddie’s friends and Robs is coming over later anyway”
He leads her towards the kitchen and she’s not surprised to find Eddie at the table with paints and figurines, “Elder Wheeler, good afternoon on this fine day”
A laugh bubbles out of her, as she takes a seat across from him and she watches Steve take the seat right next to Eddie. Eddie looks towards him and she gets to see a silent conversation pass between the two, it’s not like the ones she’d see between Steve and Robin or even the ones she’d have with Jonathan.
It ends a second later when Steve looks towards her with a tight smile, “Nancy, I’m sor-”
“No!” She’s a little loud but it makes his mouth snap shut and Eddie to widen his eyes, “sorry, but you don’t have to apologize to me. If anyone should, it’s me. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you guys or to make you uncomfortable. I, I wasn’t thinking straight”
Eddie snorts, “couldn’t imagine how to do that”
It makes both her and Steve break into a smile, she’s quicker at sobering up though, sits straighter and clears her throat before settling her eyes on Steve, “I was being selfish, that’s why I came over the other day. Your words were in my head and I thought, maybe they were telling me that we could have a second chance. But I realized, I don’t want it anymore.”
Steve looks confused, “my words? Wha- my old dream? That thing?”
She nods, “yeah and I didn’t think things through, came here and found you both in bed and, scared you”
“You did” Eddie nods, dropping a hand to Steve’s, “When Dustin and Max mentioned you were in the house and looking for Steve, it really did scare us”
“I know, and I’m truly sorry for doing that to you both.” She looks away from them and sees how tightly Eddie has Steve’s hand in his, “You’re-”
“Relationship,” Steve interrupts her, “our relationship”
She nods, “it’s yours and I shouldn’t have even thought of you the way I was.”
They both nod and it’s quiet for a moment.
“Can, can I ask you?” She doesn’t know how to approach this, this isn’t something she does a lot. This is completely different from anything she’s done before, “You don’t have to tell me anything”
The couple share another long look before looking back at her, “I’m gay, I only like boys.”
“I like both. I especially like Eddie” Steve’s smile is bright and aimed completely at Eddie, “before you ask, we’ve been dating since we got out of the hospital.”
It surprises her, it’s been months.
“Yeah, I was surprised too. Thought Stevie boy was still high off the pain meds, turns out he was completely serious” Eddie laughs, “We haven’t told many people, gotta be careful with this”
She’s not surprised by that and nods, “I understand, I’m just a little confused- if you liked him and why give me hope? Why tell me that dream of yours”
“Nance, we were in the middle of a war,” Steve squeezes Eddie’s hand before letting go and reaching over to take her hand, “I wasn’t lying, I did dream of having a future with you. I thought we weren’t going to come out of it, didn’t think I’d have even a chance of growing up. That dream was from a little lonely boy who loved you with everything, I thought you should know that before something happened to us. But that wasn’t my only dream, and I know that’s not the kind of life you’d want, right?”
Her eyes are watering and nods, “You’re right, it was nice though”
It makes all of them laugh and Nancy feels like she knows him better, “I really am sorry, not just for scaring you. But for what I did back then”
“I’m sorry too”
There’s tears falling from both of them and she can see Eddie wiping away his own eyes.
A laugh bubbles up out of her, then Steve and lastly Eddie. It’s tears and laughter between them now.
~
Okay, look I’ll be completely serious right now. This wasn’t supposed to be this long, honestly. That’s why it ends the way it does, because it could go on even more. But I’d be repeating myself I think. Also, all of this just for the image of Nancy finding out about Steddie in like the most awkward way possible. (Without it being completely explicit 🤣)
Hope it reads okay, I had some help from the discord babes, @i-less-than-three-you & @strangersteddierthings! Love you both lovelies 💜
Information that isn’t in the fic: Robin and Wayne are the first ones to know about Steddie. Dustin, Max & the CC boys are the only other ones that know (besides Nancy) everyone else doesn’t. Also this takes place over a span of a few months. The very first part is directly after vecna (max isn’t hurt) and jumps to the “two days later” after that. But Jonathan and Nancy break up is about two months later.
TAGLIST! (If you want to be added, let me know!)
@spectrum-spectre @itsfreakingbats @mysticcrownshipper @artiststarme @thereindeerlady @justforthedead89 @ronniescontinuum @freyaforestafay @littlewildflowerkitten @estrellami-1 @gregre369 @zerokrox-blog @bookworm0690 @flustratedcas @carlprocastinator1000 @marvelmwah @solliesolesito @navnae @grimmfitzz
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rinrinx2 · 7 months
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My brothers wife
Part 6
Ran x reader
Warnings:SMUT, Inappropriate language, Mature themes, Affairs, Cheating, fighting, pregnancy, mentions of miscarriage , mentions of abortion
Text like this indicate that a past event is occurring
My brothers wife <3 Masterlist
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Each tick of the clock sounded louder than the next and every breath you took you could feel in detail as a loud silence festered in your hospital room as the man you called your husband sat parallel to your hospital bed.
Rindou sat in the worn in chair, hands on either leg with clenched fists and eyes starring into yours as he tried to decipher what thoughts your mind were littered with.
You watched Rindou taking in how his eyes burned into you only for you to look ever so slightly to his left to see the massive bouquet that sat on the table beside him.
‘Magenta Lilacs’
Your mind wondered off to the flowers beside him as you began to recall the events of a few days ago.
“I got you these” Ran said as he placed the flowers into the vase on the table besides the beaten up looking chair.
“They’re pretty, what are they?” You asked as you analysed the flowers carefully.
“They’re magenta lilacs” Ran said as he tried his best to arrange the flowers in the vase.
“They symbolise the first emotions of love”
“Thought they’d be fitting for our predicament you know I’m trying to make lemons out of lemonade here and also they’re kind of the colour of my hair so when you see them you’ll think of me even more” Ran said with a smirk as his eye now looked up catching yours.
You starred into Rans eyes taking in how even his eyes matched the flowers that he had placed in the vase. All other thoughts fled your mind as you focused on Ran, nothing but Ran.
“So urhm talking about predicaments, how is yours and baby’s going ?” Ran asked a bit more seriously but trying his best to conceal the worry laced in his words.
“Oh urhm” you stuttered out as Ran’s question finally soaked into your mind breaking out of the stupor Ran had put you in.
“Doctor says baby is fine” you said as you began to fiddle with the edge of the blanket your eyes tracing every fibre as you spoke.
“And what about you?” Ran asked walking over to your bed slowly as to not startle you.
“I’m okay Ran, just okay”
And for a moment a silenced washed over the two of you as you continued picking away at the blanket while Ran quietly watched your ministrations.
Even now while your guard was up and you eyes were rimmed red from crying he still thought you were as beautiful as ever. With his child living inside you and his love for you blossoming within him.
But before long Ran realised something.
“He’ll come visit you know” Ran said taking your hand in his.
“I know” you replied.
“If you want me to stick around and wait till he comes to tell him to fuck off I will I don’t care really about missions that Mikey has me doing I’ll take the scolding if it means I can make you feel at ease I really don’t -”
“No it’s okay” you butted in before Ran could finish his sentence.
“I know you take your job very seriously so go I’ll still be here when you get back, and him don’t worry I can handle myself …. I’ve got mini Ran to help through it” you said as a small smile crept onto your face.
“Mini Ran huh” Ran joked as he poked your side.
“(Y/N)” Rindou said loud enough to break you out of your memories as your eyes went back into him.
“I just wanted to start of by saying I’m sorry for everything”
“I’m sorry for not being there more for you and neglecting you and just overall not being a good husband. I thought about coming here and lying to you about everything about the secretary and all that but I want to be honest with you I want us to start fresh. I already told the secretary to get an abortion and about Ran he doesn’t have to be in our picture anymore; we’ll move abroad you, me and baby. The three of us, I don’t care if it’s not mine I just need this to work. It has to”
You looked at Rindou watching as the desperation clung to his face. Before you could even begin to think of a reply to Rindou he began to speak again.
“Please we can do this (Y/N)” Rindou said standing up from the chair now walking over to your side as he reached for your hand without you even realising.
“I’ll let Mikey know about my plans he can give me all the dead jobs no one wants as long as it’s away from here, just say the words and we’ll be gone by tonight” Rindou said as he grasped your hand tighter his eyes begging with an answer he hoped for.
You eyes peered over to those magenta lilacs and then back to Rindou.
“I’ll think about it Rindou” you said as you gently pulled your hand out of his.
Rindou looked at you before standing to his full height as he peered down to your figure. Taking one final look before he headed to the door.
“Let me know (Y/N) - chan”
The loud thud of the closing door made the vase slightly shake on the table and you worried for a moment that it would cause the vase to fall of the table and shatter.
But those Magenta Lilacs did not fall they stood strong and proud in their vase not failing to capture your attention throughout your stay.
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“Told you I’d be back before you left” Ran said as he grabbed your bags.
“You just made it”
“Oh come on, I’m still here even if it’s your last day” Ran joked.
“Aren’t you happy you’re leaving?” Ran asked.
“Of course I am, extremely happy now I can go …”
You stopped speaking realising you weren’t sure where you’d be going and Ran realised that too as you gaze began to drift off.
“You’re rooms already set up don’t even worry about it, I don’t have goose feather mattresses but my cloud soft mattresses should do just the same job” Ran said grabbing your last bags as he began heading to the door as you followed him.
But before you allowed to fully exit the room you quickly grabbed at the now dried up bouquet of magenta lilacs.
Your actions catching Ran’s attention.
“You know I’ll buy you new flowers you don’t have to hold onto a dead bouquet”
“I know but” you said trying to come up with an explanation but Ran already knew what you wanted to explain.
“Fine just don’t get dead flower all over my car”
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“So you like?” Ran asked as he showed you, your room.
“I mean it’s something” you replied looking about the completely red room. Looking at the rose red rugs to the red decorations that littered the room.
“I didn’t know you took the whole red room so seriously” you joked as you picked up some random red nik nak.
“Sorry I didn’t know you didn’t have a favourite colour besides the real red room is down the-”
“I don’t wanna know” you said cutting Ran off before he could finish his sentence.
“Oh come on don’t act all disgusted, you know how that baby was made right” Ran said with a raised brow.
“Oh whatever get out” you said gently nudging the tall male away.
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The fluffy red covers did little to keep you warm as the cold evening air seemed to seep through every crevice possible, and as much as you wanted to just endure the coldness of the night you knew your son would retaliate against your actions.
So without a second thought you began you ascension to Ran’s room.
The journey felt never ending if Ran’s room was just down the hallway from yours; your nerves were shot and you felt the heat rise to your cheeks as if it would be the first time sharing a bed with Ran as if the child growing within you wasn’t due to the past actions of you and Ran in a bed.
“You gonna stand like a ghost at the door or you gonna get into bed” Ran questioned rhetorically, as you still stood dumbfounded for only a minute longer before you walked over to Ran’s bed carefully slipping into his covers to not alert him any further.
But all your advances of trying your best not to disturb Ran further we’re ruined when you felt him move himself over to you.
“Do you feel comfortable now?” Ran asked as his arms wrapped around your waist lazily.
“Mhmm” you hummed as you remained as still as a statue as you lied on your side.
You remained in Ran’s arms hearing his soft breathes as he ventured back into sleep and as tempting as it was to follow him but your body still held some energy that kept you awake.
“You’re still awake” Ran said with his eyes closed as he still felt your stiff body in his arms.
“I don’t feel that tired yet” you replied honestly.
And then Ran went quiet for a moment more before you began to feel hands at your side pulling your nighty up as finger went to your pantie pulling them to the side.
“What you doing?”
“Helping you feel tired” Ran replied nonchalantly as you felt his member tickle at your entrance.
And the blunt dullness of his head that teased your entrance brought back memories of how he’d fuck you to sleep just as he was about to do now.
And it didn’t take much of those memories to get you soaked. Ran’s tip began to gather slick from your dripping cunt as he slipped his member between your folds massaging his cock through your puffy folds.
The pressure that your clit throbbed with hoping Ran would finally sink into you was driving you wild and Ran knew it was he could tell from the way your nipples were pebbling underneath your silk nighty as his hand now toyed with the harden nubs.
Ran’s one hand remained on your nipple as the other travelled to your swollen clit. Rolling his fingertips over the bundle of nerves as he applied pressure to it that had you buckling into his hand.
“Ran” you moaned out as his teasing was becoming to much, from the feeling of his cock head playing at your entrance and his one hand pinching at your nipples while the other pressed on your clit, the feeling starting to have you see stars but just as you fell of the edge you felt that blunt tip split you in half as Ran shoved his cock in without warning.
“Fuck” Ran moaned as he felt you cum hard around his cock without warning.
Ran felt as your walls hugged him trying it’s best to milk him, Ran let out a soft laugh at your pussys action.
Slowly Ran began to thrust into you fucking you through your pleasure as a new wave of pleasure was beginning to build.
The sweat between your breast dripped down your body, while Ran’s hands grasped at your hips as he fucked into you like he was thirsty for your pussy to drench him. The sheets feeling more heavy as you tried your best not cum as Ran began to thrust harder and deeper hitting that spot deep within your pussy that only he knew.
“You’re gonna cum” Ran stated already knowing from your high pitched moans that you wouldn’t be able to last a minute longer.
And from his load grunts you could tell he was close too.
Ran began to fuck you now like a feral animal, the need and urge to feel that gripping feeling around him again to finally have your pussy milk him and him to give you that seed, that seed that if you weren’t already pregnant he was sure that you would be after this.
The sheets finally felt to heavy and your nipples to sensitive as Ran thrusted once again and suddenly it all felt to much again as that feeling bubbled over again. You gripped the sheets as you came feeling your pussy wrap around Ran suffocating his cock.
And Ran gladly allowed you to take his cock as he shot hot white seed into you letting you take all that he gave you.
Loud heavy breathing echoed throughout the room as your hands loosened from the sheets.
“You should be tired now” Ran said with his cock still buried in as he hugged you tighter, and within 3 minutes you once again heard those soft breathing as if Ran wasn’t fucking you not to long ago but this time you followed him in sleeping.
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Ran sat on the opposite end of the small kitchen table as he sipped on his morning coffee while you ate your no named brand cereal.
The scene felt like something out of a dream, like the man across from you was your husband and the child that merrily resided in you was yours, like a child you had planned.
And that feeling continued for what felt like forever, just you and Ran, the post love making glow still settled onto your skin as every now and then Ran would look over at you basking in your beauty.
You could get use to this and you’d hoped that you would that was until you heard a knock at the door, that hard shrilling knock that crushed your dream reality with Ran.
Because you knew who was knocking.
You knew it was the man you were actually married knocking the man who had cheated on you before you began your affair, the man who had neglected you to the point that you sorted comfort from his own brother it was Haitani Rindou.
And yet when that door opened you were shocked to find a woman.
A short, brunette, that dawned a heavy coat covering most of her body. Her facial expression was that of relief and worry. Like she was relieved to see you yet prettified by your presence and the tremble in her voice confirmed these feeling when she spoke.
“Good morning are you, Haitani (Y/N)?”
“I’m your husbands secretary”
.
.
.
Taglist : @reiners-milkbiddies
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