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#mulch diggums
checkoutmybookshelf · 4 months
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I mean...this combination of depth and toilet humor is literally Shakespearean, so A+ for Eoin Colfer.
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liznfin · 7 months
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I can’t believe Artemis gets mauled by a gorilla in Time Paradox and it’s the least of his problems.
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af-answers · 10 months
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In celebration of reaching 1000 posts: lollipops for everyone!
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weeinterpreter · 11 months
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Mulch: Ah, hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.
Artemis: Maybe we would, if you would stop breaking into my house.
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scasmmm · 20 days
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Holly (exasperated): Do you even know what an amulet is?
Mulch: Of course I do! I eat them some times. I like the ones with cheese and onions!
Holly: Mulch those are omelettes.
Mulch: Oh. Then I have no idea.
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themisstresstm · 2 months
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Ah fuck it. Aroace! Mulch Diggums because I said so.
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abeehiltz1159 · 7 months
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“Artemis Fowl and the Lost Colony”: Stuff I Like So Far
ARTEMIS AND HOLLY’S DYNAMIC
No.1!!! He’s so!!!! Blorbo!!!!! 🥺❤️
Butler having a sense of humor
Artemis having a sense of humor
Artemis and Holly’s consistent banter
“Glad to hear it,” said Holly. “I had visions of you two drinking tea at the beach while I sweat it out here.” / Twenty yards from where Artemis was sitting, waves swirled along the beach like emerald paint poured from a bucket. / “Tea? At the beach? No time for luxuries, Holly. There is work to be done.” He winked at Butler. [Chapter 6, page 125]
Mulch actually being an honest being
Billy Kong. Not him as a character. Just his name.
“He’s crazy,” [Mulch] gibbered, . . . “The pixie is crazy! Give me your gun, Holly. I’m going to shoot him.” [Chapter 7, page 141]
the scene where No.1 tries speaking English!
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irunaki · 5 months
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he was defeated.
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fortisloid · 6 months
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like that one textpost.
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artemisfowlcodex · 8 months
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(Artemis, Butler, Holly, and Mulch walk through a security checkpoint) Checkpoint: [BEEPING] Mulch, without hesitation: I swear to god I didn't touch anything!
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ven-ugh · 3 months
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crossover bettween Gravity Falls and Artemis Fowl hehehehehh
(arty and bill would be besties fr)
Finally finished it🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
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It’s almost utterly another world so not all of them are exact characters from the original show
1. Artemis (as Dipper) 18 yo
— Artemis Fowl Senior is alive and never got kidnapped by Russians but>>
— parents sent him to Gravity Falls to Butler (their ex bodyguard so he could protect Artemis) because they started getting threats from Russian mafia
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2. Juliet (as Mabel) 20 yo
— she is Artemis’s actual bodyguard but due to her character they are more like siblings
— obviously she’s going with Artemis because she also knows Gravity Falls very well since she often visited her brother there
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3. Butler (as uncle Stan) 33 yo
— owns the Mystery Shack exept he doesn’t create any exhibits himself, they all are real
— actually retired due to their agreement with Artemis’s parents that they would probably need a place to hide someday so he went to his childhood hometown and also succeeded in business
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4. Holly (as mix of Wendy and Soos) 82 yo
— is actually an elf hiding her ears and working on Butler
— lives w Julius as her dad
— you could see her run away into the forest each night to visit her friends
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5. Foaly (the one and only) 245 yo
— one of the friends she’s visiting
— Foaly probably just created a safe place for himself in the forest and lives there
— Holly is bringing him food and drinks from time to time
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6. Julius (as Manly Dan ak Wendy’s father) 537 yo
— works in police
— when someone asks him about why he and his daughter are so different he just stares menacingly (tho in documents Holly is listed as his adopted daughter)
— also sometimes visit Foaly but they always end up in a fight
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7. Mulch (as Old Man McGucket but not crazy) 566 yo
— he’s still a criminal dwarf
— he has to spend a lot of stolen money on sunscreen even tho he usually wals around in the night
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8. Minerva (as Pacifica Northwest) 16 yo
— she’s done with her controlling father and is in her rebellious era
— she wears strange combinations of accessories clothes and makeup to make her father mad and because she likes them, so who are we to judge she just wants some freedom
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9. Opal (as Gideon) 250 yo (and ik she doesn’t look menacing at all)
— she did an operation on her ears and is always trying to expose Holly’s and Julius’s elfness so people would kill them or at least put them in jail and she would be praised as their hero
— she always loses and can’t do anything with them
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elfizchan · 4 months
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[PT/BR]
Da AU de banda metal/rock da @irunaki!!!!! (Me encontro obcecada-) 🍭
[ENG]
About @irunaki 's metal/rock band AU!!!!!(I'm obsessed-) 🍭
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aprill-99 · 2 years
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Say whatever you want about the science behind the time travel in “Artemis Fowl: The Time Paradox”, but it’s the only novel I’ve ever read where the main character does in fact, hatch a plan so complicated that he double crosses himself.
In 2 directions.
And that has immense literary value to me.
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af-answers · 9 months
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To anyone who'd like to answer, what little thing, like a minor inconvenience or an accidental misfortune, frustrates you the most?
Holly: Just missing the tube. It's so annoying when the doors shut right in your face. I get why they do but-- it tempts me to risk the traffic.
Mulch: Have you ever been eating something soft and then your whole skull shakes with an unidentified hard object between your jaws? That, but with soil.
Juliet: When any of the parents at the twins' school try to talk to me. They know I'm not their mom, and so they try to ask "friendly" prying questions. I've started telling them I'm not allowed to talk to civilians.
Myles: Yes, that approach makes us very popular.
Beckett: For real! Juliet is the most popular not-mom in the school! A lot of boys from school want to come over to meet her.
Myles: That's my annoying inconvenience.
Foaly: The lack of centaur-friendly seating-- anywhere.
Root: HR.
Butler: Mine is when boundaries I thought I'd established are breached without warning.
Artemis: Mine is passive aggression. On a completely unrelated note, because I cannot for the life of me conceive of a smooth segue: what are you wearing?
Butler: I found it in my room. I assumed it was part of some bizarre scheme you didn't tell me about.
Artemis (laughing): Bizarre scheme, assuredly, but not mine.
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weeinterpreter · 1 year
Conversation
Mulch: Are you reading fanfiction?
Artemis, reading an article about extremely rare diseases: Wh- No.
Mulch: Oh, is it on AO3?
Artemis: This is CNN.
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scasmmm · 1 month
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Artemis Fowl characters in one line (in the first book):
Artemis: I have money = i happy :D
Holly: Rulebook? what's that?
Foaly: i have cutting edge technology but the most reliable is still my tinfoil hat
Root: so angry hes turning purple
Mulch: i eat dirt 👍👍
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