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keyotos · 9 months

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loved you every single day

summary ⎯ what is love for the xianzhou guys? that's basically it. very sappy and tender and sentimental.

includes ⎯ dan heng, blade, jing yuan

tana's words ⎯ hi...

dan heng

⎯ dan heng had a vague understanding of what love felt like. before the astral express, he never really knew what love really felt like due to memory loss. but he learned, eventually.

⎯ he found love when himiko always offered to make another coffee cup for him (this time, with the blend he enjoys). he found love whenever march/stelle would check on him during the late hours of the night, knowing he'd be buried in books. he found love whenever welt offered to shoulder the burdens of keeping watch during trailblazing missions.

⎯ but he has never felt love like this before. not with you anyway.

⎯ there was a sense of loyalty he had for you. of course, he was obviously also loyal to the crew, but it was different with you.

⎯ you made him want to follow you towards the end of the universe. you made him want to run with you into the light or whatever awaits the both of you later on. he was willing to do all of it.

⎯ why? a lame question to ask, he thinks. there are hundreds of reasons why, and he could list them easily. was your smile and the way it instantly warmed an entire room enough reason? or should he add onto the fact that you were practically made of stardust and cosmic radiance? that you have some kind of miraculous or even transcendental ability to string words so brilliantly that it manages to calm the harshest of voices down?

⎯ and love was scary for dan heng, at first. there were too many hindrances and difficulties in his life. for one, he could not let you get caught up in his past. he wouldn't: he would make sure of it. for two, he wasn't very used to love.

⎯ yeah, there was the express crew. but there was also you. dan heng thought that he would spend the rest of his life alone. he still has not settled into his room on the express because he reasoned that he'd stay until the archives until he was ready to leave. but you challenged all of that.

⎯ how is it that one person could make him want to stay by their side forever? how is it that you have such an enormous effect on him, yet you aren't even aware of it? every wall or barrier he's put up, you've always managed to erode it down. you allowed him to be vulnerable and you allowed him to be carefree. you allowed him to relax. to breathe.

⎯ loving you, was to breathe, for dan heng. you were the gasp of air that he needed while he was drowning beneath the waters. finally being able to decompress and unwind; he felt lighter around you. less stressed, less worried. less stoic. less somber.

⎯ he has never even thought of love like that before he had met you. but you changed him. and he is eternally grateful for that. eternally grateful for you. you are his home, his safe space, his sanctuary of security.

⎯ so he repays you often. he knows what kind of tea you drink and how to make it by heart. he makes a cup for you every morning. you have your own shelf in his archive. hell, you have your own damn space in there as well. there's an indent of you in every corner of every room.

⎯ or maybe, dan heng is so accustomed to you that he sees you in everything.

⎯ he lets you read from his shoulder. he has a shelf filled with all your favorite books from various worlds in his archives. he lets you sleep on his body rather than the flacid mattress on the ground, because he wants to keep you as comfortable as you've kept him. his fingers trace your body every night you stay with him, to ensure that you are safe and you are here, and he is home.

"are you sure you're comfortable like this?" you ask, situated on top of dan heng's body. you're partly afraid that you'll crush him with your entire body weight on him, and that his back would hurt after tonight, "wouldn't it just be smarter to crash in my room instead?"

his chest rises and falls underneath you, getting slower and slower as time goes by, "if you'd like. we can go."

you bite the inside of your lip in thought. it would be safer to do so, for both your and dan heng's safety. but, to be honest, you were very comfortable and tired. "is your back gonna be okay after this?"

"it'll be fine," he brushes off, "besides, you've been sleeping on me for the past few nights now. i can handle one more night."

"huh???"

blade (contains lore spoilers)

⎯ love was something blade has always lived without. as a child, with war and battles as a constant on his homeworld, there wasn't any room for affection or anything similar.

⎯ but then you came along, practically shaking his entire world. there you were, dragging him off to drink god awful mung bean soda. to force him to go outside on days where he was over-occupied with work. to let him enjoy something for once in a while. to let him rub his thumb over yours in the quiet hours of the night, forgetting about work and all other duties.

⎯ he had never thought that loving could be so easy until he met you. it seemed as though time would stop in his tracks whenever he saw you. blade thought it was a myth coming from romance novels (one he had heard from you, ironically enough), but it proved to be, in fact, real.

⎯ and everything was easy. up until everything wasn't. it was one thing, then the other. baiheng passed, jingliu was extremely distraught. it was wearying to see everything go so downhill, so fast. nobody was ever the same after that period.

⎯ yet even after all that, you still had the same look in your eye. you looked at blade the same way you looked at him all those years ago. so much has changed between the both of you, and you know that the both of you would never be able to return to the past.

⎯ though, even after all of that, some things remained the same. for example, the way you never failed to take his breath away. seeing you for the first time in years had him going through a plethora of feelings: distraught, appalled, and slightly less dejected.

⎯ but most importantly, there were still parts of the other's heart still beating for each other. even if you couldn't love him anymore, you still cared about him. you cared about him the same way you did all those years ago.

⎯ you went out of your way to find him. you went out of your way to offer him solace, even if it was for one last time. why? he didn't want to know, he didn't want to ask. he has a mission: he has to pursue it, always. nevertheless, he still found himself underneath the sun's rays, as it managed to follow him wherever, saying, "i'm here. even if you don't see me sometimes, i am still here."

⎯ and if you still cared... well, there was still hope, right?

he's leaning over a rail, looking over the xianzhou skies and the starskiffs racing by. he hasn't been back in ages. it feels... strange; it feels as if he's experiencing his first day all over again.

blade is so fascinated by the sight that he fails to hear your footsteps come closer, now reaching his side. he only hears you after you clear your throat. he's startled, for obvious reasons: but, when he sees you hold up a mung bean soda in surrender, he's surprised at how fast the panic dies down.

"aren't you going to arrest me?" he took a step back from you. you didn't move, but instead held out the drink.

"i could," you dragged out, checking your watch, "but... i'm not on duty," the corners of your lips turn up ever so slightly, like you were happy at the fact that you were having a drink with a criminal. you pull open the tab and take a sip, then offer it towards him.

he blankly stares at your hand. remembers the feeling of it in his. now, his mind is skewed. maybe even grotesque if he wanted to sound dreadful about it. but there are few happy memories he can recall, as well as the feelings during them, and it seems like you are recreating one of them currently. and oddly enough, there are no feelings of bitterness that follow him this time.

he takes and drinks the mung bean soda, and to his surprise, it’s not as bad as it was many years ago. maybe it was because your lips were on it, or maybe it’s because the once atrocious drink did get better. and when he looks up and is greeted by your curious face, he hopes that love is like that as well.

jing yuan

⎯ years ago, if you had asked jing yuan what love was, he'd say something benign: love is indescribable. a simple answer for a simple man in love. but oh, has time took its toll.

⎯ it isn't to say that love isn't indescribable. on some days, he finds it worrying that he may love you too much⎯that his willingness to give you the world was a bit concerning at times. others point it out, but jing yuan chooses to be blindsided. but he is always aware.

⎯ aware. jing yuan is nothing short of perceptive. he has been around for centuries. he has been there for wars, for battles, for decrees. and it sticks with him: forever. he does not simply forget, yet he is forced to stay in one place forever. immorality may be a blessing for others, but a curse for xianzhou natives.

⎯ he does not give himself a moment to fully relax. even if it seems that way a lot (the dozing general needs his power naps), he is always back to his duties.

⎯ however, it's different with you. with you, he has no burdens to shoulder. he has no secrets to keep from you. there is no wall of tension blocking between you. with you, everything is for grabs. his feelings, his emotions, his heart.

⎯ vulnerability. many look down at the vulnerable. and in jing yuan's line of work, the cost of vulnerability comes with a substantial price. his guard has to be up at all costs, because if not, there would be another catastrophe. his act as a lazy general is just a rouse, because there is so much that's weighing on him inside.

⎯ in a city that flies, jing yuan feels rooted by the weight of the luofu.

⎯ so imagine the amount of unconcern he feels when he's around you. the feeling of rocks suffocating him has subsided, and you are here to remove them. and one by one, he begins to feel lighter and lighter as you hull them off.

⎯ and you don't get tired. you're still here. you keep picking off the rocks, even the smallest ones. you relentlessly continue until everything is gone, and the only things left are just you and him.

⎯ by now, he understands what love is. it's when he knows how your fingers have ran through every crevice of his brain, every knot in his stomach, every knot in his soul. it's understanding. it's being able to shoulder the weight of the world with another. it's someone staying to help you get the rocks off of your body.

⎯ love is being met with soft touches instead of daggers. love is being met with mhms and reallys while retelling a story from this morning. love is being able to speak about the past, the truth of it all, and allowing the light to peek through instead of the darkness. that is what love is.

"and then, get this, i found him in the midst of a fight with blade," jing yuan throws his head on your shoulder exasperatedly, disregarding the fact that you were halfway through your novel.

"well, he was doing his job," you counter, looking back towards your lover.

"i know," he slides a hand across his face, "it's just tiring. and i don't want him to get hurt." like others, is the unspoken phrase here. it's on the tip of his tongue, you know it.

you place a bookmark in your book before shutting it. you finally turn your full attention towards jing yuan, "he's strong. you trained him."

"but," he sighs, "what if it's not enough?"

you decide the mood is a little too melancholic, so you decide to lighten the mood a little bit, "then i'll take over as general of the luofu," you grinned. jing yuan smiled as well: your smile was infectious, how could he not?

you ran a hand through his hair, "you are good enough. i hope you know that. you won't fail yanqing. he's tough and stubborn... he sadly gets that from you."

jing yuan chuckles, a real chuckle, and pulls you closer to him as you grab your book once again. he presses a chaste kiss to your temple as he reads along to the same words on a page as you.

yes, things will be okay, he thinks.

hi y'all! i have been sooo busy w sm stuff lately, like i've been preparing for college and i've been going to the gym and i've been doing sm. updates have been scarce except like the 3 alhaitham posts (i couldn't resist). but hopefully during these last few weeks of summer i can get my grind back on!!!

#tana writes (∗´ ᨔ `∗)#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #hsr #hsr x reader #dan heng x reader #dan heng x you #blade x reader #blade x you #hsr blade #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan x you #im back from the dead #ive had sm stuff to do like i had the college talk td and man o man o man #tbh some of my metaphors DID NOT make sense. i wrote this at 3 am like all my other fics #missing when i used to pump out hcs before 12 am 🙁🙁🙁#honestly blade's is a little short but i'm still trying to figure out his character so i promise u blade lovers i will feed u soon hehe

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bangtaninborderland · 8 months

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JJK-SEVEN

Summary: you know it isn't healthy, you know you should leave, but you can’t and neither can he.

Genre: hurt/comfort, angst.

A/N: self indulge from my own experiences

BTS MASTERLIST.

JK POV

You get home a little past 6 pm, Jungkook isn’t there, he is always busy though so that’s normal. You set your bags down, slip your shoes off and head straight to change into some comfy clothes. You loved the confidence you felt ready for the day, the way you felt a little braver as you applied a hint of concealer under your eyes, masking the lack of sleep you’d had but your favourite time of the day was the moment you could come home and remove it all.

It doesn’t take you long to dress down and situate yourself on the couch. You eye your phone a few times, debating whether or not to call Jungkook ultimately deciding against it. He would probably be upset if you called in the middle of a schedule especially if he was in a meeting or something. You settled for a simple text:

You: I’m home, will you be here for dinner?

J🩶: No, working late, don’t wait up.

You: Okay, Love you.

Message Read 6:48PM

The message is left unread but that’s okay, Jungkook is a busy person with things to do. You don’t take what you have for granted so instead of mourning the time you don’t have you focus on the time you do have. Which albeit isn’t much, even when he isn’t working he finds better things to do.

You’d never stop him though, he worked hard, and he deserved that time for himself. You couldn’t be a burden.

You settle on ordering takeout for dinner, it was pointless cooking a meal that would never get finished. The leftovers from three days ago are still in the refrigerator, untouched, despite the note you’d left telling your boyfriend that they were there.

The food arrived an hour later, you turned on the TV and tucked in, letting yourself be drawn into the world of another sappy drama but not even that could keep your mind from wandering, from thinking about how everything got so messed up.

You’d started out years ago, two young kids just wanting some affection and care. Jungkook had just left another relationship, being three years older than you it was safe to say you’d had significantly less experience in the dating department but you fell hard and fast. You’d call all the time, things were busy then but never as busy as now, he would often wait up until late at night when everyone else was asleep to call you from the shared Bangtan dorm room, even if it meant he was a little more tired the next day. He would write you sweet messages whenever he had time, a few words that you would cherish and reread anytime you missed him.

Sure there were rough patches, fights, disagreements, the distance was hard whenever he was on tour and even though it hurt you, really hurt you, there was something always holding you in place so you never left, you couldn’t even imagine it, the few times Jungkook had proposed a break-up or a break you’d denied, argued against it, plead your case as though you were on trial because you couldn’t lose him. He was all you had.

You had friends sure but none that you were actually close to, family wasn’t something you found comfort in, and the arguments that came with being around them were something you’d rather not experience so you stayed away, stayed alone. Maybe that’s why it was so easy to adapt to everything Jungkook was, there hadn’t been a single thing you’d done without him in mind.

You’d been his place to let out everything he felt, most of his emotions bottling up until it came out as a wave of evil anger, words that lacked truth still tearing you apart piece by piece. Still, his apologies were sweet, warm, and soft, they gave you comfort. So you smiled and said it was okay, smiled and tried to ignore the list of names and backhanded comments you’d heard.

Besides, the next day everything was okay, everything would always be okay eventually.

You’re still sitting on the couch when Jungkook gets home, he walks straight into the bedroom, ignoring your presence as though you don’t exist but you remind yourself it’s dark, you didn’t have the lights on so he probably didn’t see you.

“Marco?” He called out and you couldn’t help but smile at the silly American game he had taught you a few years ago.

“Polo.” You called back, unable to hide your grin.

As he came closer you smelt the soju on his breath. “I thought you were working late?”

He groaned, slumping against you on the couch. “Yeah, well we finished around 7 so Mingyu asked if I wanted to get drinks.” He shrugged. “Don’t get all mad.”

“I’m not mad Kook.” You were thankful no lights had been turned off, although you could cover up the shake in your voice the sadness in your eyes was significantly harder to rid yourself of. “I just missed you.”

“Fuck I know okay, I know but I don’t need you putting pressure on me too I’m already working hard twenty-four seven, you want me to come home and be the perfect boyfriend to you but where is my time? Where is the time for me? It’s selfish of you to always put your wants first.”

“No I just meant that I missed you I didn’t-“ you sighed, the argument dying on your tongue. “I’m sorry.”

“You always say that. You just ruined a good day…god” he huffed, a hand running through his hair. “I’m going to shower and then I’ll sleep.” With that he was gone, his footsteps retreating.

A coldness settled over you, an unspeakable pain simmering in your chest. He had misunderstood, the words you’d said with honest intentions had been taken out of context and twisted to portray you as a selfish person.

As much as you loved Jungkook he had one flaw, he failed to see what wasn’t directly In front of him. He wouldn’t ever be able to realise or understand the extent to which you’d given up everything of yourself to be with him. The friends you couldn’t have because you felt awful having such an important secret that you couldn’t share with them, the fact Jungkook was…Jungkook meant the relationship you had couldn’t exactly be paraded around, your own paranoia preventing you from having friends in case they found out and shared it with the media. You’d hidden your own dark days whenever something was troubling him, you chose your words carefully to prevent him from worrying too much. You’d always hold off discussing things that had been awkward or uncomfortable until it was suitable for him and by then those feelings and situations were too far gone to bring back up.

It all piled up and then what was once a small ball of insecurity, sadness and longing had grown into a boulder, one that you carried around on your shoulders every day, the weight crushing you slowly.

Still, you didn’t pick a fight, you let it be. Tomorrow would be better, you wouldn’t talk about it, not seriously, you never did.

You waited until you heard the shower switch off, giving him time to fall asleep before joining him in bed.

Maybe it was just habit, something that you’d both done for so long it happened involuntarily but Jungkook reached out for you, tucking your body under his as he whispered a soft “I love you” with a kiss to your head.

The next day things were better, Surprisingly you found him at the stove, singing along to some slow song, probably something Taehyung had sent to him. “Good morning baby.”

You smiled at the term of endearment. “Good morning.”

“Come here.” He called out to you, turning the stove down before opening his arms for you. “I’m sorry about last night.”

Your heart ached at the reminder of his anger the night before, his misunderstanding of your words, his lack of understanding of how you felt. “It’s okay.”

He pushes you back a little, observing your face. “Is it really? Do you forgive me?”

“Always, I’ll always forgive you.” You smiled back and it wasn’t a lie. You would always forgive him, regardless of what he did, or how he hurt you, you would always forgive him because you simply could t live without him.

You both knew it wasn’t healthy, knew it wasn’t okay to act this way, to brush over the misunderstandings you dealt with daily but you couldn’t help it. Facing just how bad things were between you, facing just how poor your communication and trust was meant facing the reality that there was no way to fix it.

The only fix would be to separate and you knew, you knew without a doubt you wouldn’t take that step and neither would he.

So you both held on, ignoring the boulder because you couldn’t let go, even if it was just attachment, you’d let yourself be safe here in the familiarity of everything you shared together for a little longer, even if the boulder was killing you.

You held onto the false reality you’ve created between yourselves, you were sure you always would even if it was insincere because the pain of being the person who took every negative emotion out on was nothing compared to the pain and emptiness you’d feel if he wasn’t there with you, if you no longer had him to hold you and brush your tears away.

“I’m in love with you.” He leaned down to kiss you, tilting your head upwards for easier access.

“I’ll love you for the rest of my life.”

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wttcsms · 7 months

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i can walk you home and practice method acting ; satoru gojo.

pairing satoru gojo x f!reader word count 1.3k synopsis saying goodbye. content contains hurt/probably no comfort, bittersweet ending, allusion to character death, jjk 236 leak inspired author’s notes gege needs to sleep with both eyes open, no sweet dreams 4 him >:(

“You know, some people consider coffee dates as not real dates,” you point out. “Very cheap—”

“—your coffee was eight dollars, don’t start with me—”

“—low-effort—”

“—you don’t even wanna know what I just went through before meeting you here—”

“—shows no interest—”

“—I’ve been interested in you since before I even knew you.”

You pause your half-hearted attempt at teasing him. The truth is, there is nothing cheap, low-effort, or uninteresting about Satoru Gojo. No one has ever held your attention and your affections for as long or as strongly as he does. The world is reduced to nothing more than the cafe the two of you spent a lot of time frequenting beforehand. It’s why everything is in such startling, vivid detail. Some of your best memories are here, and it shows from the warm scent of coffee wafting in the air, and how you got his complicated frozen coffee order just right.

“Smooth. You use that line on all the girls you buy coffee for?”

“Oh, other girls exist?” Satoru’s bright, cerulean eyes widen in mock surprise. If there’s one thing that your fiance is good at, it’s committing to the bit. No one gets into character as well as he does.

No one ever will.

Trying to keep your darker thoughts at bay, you try to think of a retort but fall short, settling for, “How can you even be interested in someone before you even know they exist?”

“Because everyone was boring to me ‘til I met you. All my interest was reserved specifically for you.” He hums. He doesn’t tell you the really sappy stuff he holds inside his heart, like how he thinks his soul knew that it belonged to you and that’s why he could never connect with anyone else. He figures, foolishly, that he still has time to bring it up later.

Later, when he’s not choking on his own blood and lost in the illusion you have shrouded the both of you in.

My beautiful, delusional girl.

He says it to tease you, but the fondness with which he laces the words in only further proves how completely, utterly whipped he is for you. Somewhere deep inside of him, he’s well aware that he’s in your domain. That he is not sitting inside the cafe he nervously took you to the first time he got the nerve to ask you to hang out. He knows that this is nothing more than a cleverly crafted illusion used to make saying goodbye a lot easier for the two of you.

Everything is just so vivid. The colors, the scent, you. He knows it’s selfish to want to drag out this process even longer. It must be tiring for you, to have to mentally strain to maintain this realistic illusion while also tricking his mind into ignoring the pain he’s actually in. He can see it in your eyes; the ones that never seem to want to leave his face, almost like you’re scared you’re going to forget him the moment you blink.

He stretches, fakes a yawn. “It’s getting kinda late, don’t ya think? I should probably head home.”

“I’ll walk you there.” You say, getting up from your chair.

“You think a man like me can’t defend himself?” You want to remember Satoru like this: messy hair, eyes brimming with mischief and life, cocky grin. Maybe it’s your heart acting on its own accord, altering reality for your own benefit, but Satoru looks younger in this lighting. Happier. At peace.

“I think you’re the type of man people need to be defended from. It’s my civic duty to make sure you’re not wreaking havoc.”

You know that time is limited. You know that neither of you really want to acknowledge what’s truly happening. Satoru has to go, and all that he’ll be leaving you behind with is the aftermath. If you try hard enough, you can manipulate your minds into thinking that these seconds are much longer than they actually are, but—

—he deserves to rest.

That’s why walking him to his front door is an ordeal that lasts a total of two seconds. One blink, and the cafe has vanished. Now, he’s standing in front of his apartment door, still smiling, still bright, still alive.

“So, you going to invite me in?” You tease him, keeping your tone lighthearted, as if he doesn’t know you well enough to know how you’re truly feeling.

“After just the first date?” He pretends to look offended. “I don’t know what kind of man you take me for, but I don’t let just anyone spend the night, especially only after a coffee non-date.”

“Fine.” You pretend to contemplate, the smile on your face perhaps the only real thing here. “Will you let me hit on the second date, at least?”

“I’ll think about it.” And then, Satoru cocks his head to the side. “I’ll see you the same time next week?”

You don’t want to think about the real world. In this world, it’s just the two of you, and that’s all that matters.

You swallow back any sadness; Satoru swallows back any blood.

“Text me where, and I’ll be there.” You say this, knowing that you would gladly follow Satoru right through the door that beckons for him. He’s smiling, like he knows what you’re thinking about.

“I’ll pick you up when it’s time. But, uh, if I don’t text you back soon, sorry in advance.” He gives you that boyish look of his, the face he always makes when he’s about to make an incredibly stupid joke. “I have a bad habit of ghosting people.”

A kind of guttural sound leaves your throat; a choked up laugh and a barely concealed sob. Ghosting, really, Satoru?

“It’s okay. I have a bad habit of liking guys that are bad for my health.”

“If you don’t hear from me, just know that it’s me and not you.”

“I love being fed cliche lines like this. Tell me some more.” Tell me everything, you want to beg him. Let’s just stand here forever, and you’ll drag out the time, and he can talk for as long as he wants to about anything and everything.

“Feeling a bit sleepy. The cliche lines will have to wait until next time.” He clears his throat. “Hey, I know we just had our first date—”

“—coffee doesn’t count, you still owe me a real first date.”

He sticks out his tongue, childishly, at your interruption. “Is it too soon for me to tell you that I love you? I don’t normally move this fast, but I really do love you. Hope this doesn’t scare you away.”

He could never scare you away.

You should tell him that, but something in his eyes and in his smile let’s you know that he’s already aware.

“Is it too soon for me to tell you that I love you, too?”

“Yeah, it’s kinda crazy. Lucky for you, I like crazy girls.”

“Please don’t go to sleep yet, Satoru. You haven’t even walked through the door yet, and I already miss you.” In the illusion you’ve created, you can take away that door from him. It won’t change the truth, but it can certainly prolong the pain that comes with it. You don’t, though. Even if his hand wasn’t already reaching for the doorknob, you would never take the choice away from him.

“Yeah, I have a lasting effect on women, what can I say?” He laughs, but there’s none of his trademark humor woven in it. The world goes quiet. “I’m feeling really tired, [Name]. I’m gonna head to bed now.”

“Goodnight, then. Sweet dreams, Satoru.”

He looks at you. Really looks at you, like he’s trying to embed the memory of your visage on his pupils, to have it so permanently etched in his mind that he’ll still be able to remember you every time he closes his eyes.

“As long as you’re in every single one of them, they will be.”

He opens the door.

a/n: reader's cursed technique is the ability to use cursed energy to "manipulate" reality; in all actuality, you create illusions, able to trick others into seeing whatever you're crafting. it helps in trapping curses, and letting gojo say goodbye to you without making you look at him choke on his blood

#satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #jjk 236 #jjk x reader #angst #jjk angst #gojo angst #gojo x reader #one shot #drabble #imagine

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suggiesug · 6 months

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"choke me?"

gn reader x jjk men: asking him to choke you characters: satoru gojo, suguru geto, kento nanami, toji fushiguro, choso content: EXPLICIT NSFW (MDNI), choking, dirty talk, roughness, possessiveness, aftercare, praise, body worship, overstimulation

SATORU GOJO

Satoru likes to treat it like some kind of challenge - for both of you. He likes to see how long you can hold your breath, or see how long you can go before the lack of blood to your brain almost makes you pass out. He likes seeing how red your face gets, and he's so snarky and mean with his little comments. He calls you his little cherry tomato once, and you threaten to call the whole thing off if he doesn't stop killing the vibe.

It's a challenge for him, too, because he's always struggled with self-restraint when it comes to you. When you get all red, and out of breath, and teary-eyed, and drooling, it's difficult for him to not just let go and fuck you into the mattress with his hands permanently cuffed around your neck. He doesn't always stop himself from giving into that desire, though, and it leaves you sore but satisfied on the bed's covers. For how much of an asshole he was during, Satoru's fairly sweet afterwards. Your neck is sore, maybe a little bruised, and while he enjoys the look, he doesn't like the idea that he struggles to hold his strength back so much. At the end of the day, he's the strongest: it'd be easy for him to kill you doing this. So he treats you gently afterwards, massages your neck and loosely wraps a warm, damp towel around it. He cheers you up with annoying quips and jokes, and you fall asleep with his long arms wrapped around you, chest-to-back.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

SUGURU GETO

It's a surprise to him: he's no prude (far from it), but he's still a little shocked when you ask it of him. Surprise aside, he doesn't hesitate to not only indulge, but enjoy.

Your pulse is his favourite thing about it. Maybe it's partly for sappy reasons, partly for power reasons, but he enjoys being able to feel your pulse beneath his fingers. Enjoys letting you breathe so that you can make pretty little noises for him, and his grip isn't all too tight. It won't bruise. Just a red mark. That's more than enough for him. He prefers his bruises to be in the shape of teeth, anyway.

Suguru's a tease, though. The redness of your face is just as much from his words as it is from the restriction of blood to your head, and he barely touches you besides the grip on your neck. His words are enough to rile you up, make you squirm beneath him, and that sly smirk on his face lets you know that your reactions make him more than happy. You're so dirty, asking me for this. Do you want me to fuck you while I do it? I bet you'd be so tight around me. I can see how much you're dripping. So desperate.

Suguru touches you more, eventually, but he doesn't fuck you. He's too much of a tease. But he gets you off, one hand on your neck, the other hard at work pleasuring you, and the yell you release sounds broken up when you finally tip over the each. Suguru thinks it's one of his most favourite sounds you've made.

Of course, he's sweet in the aftermath. Attentive and knowledgeable on the aftercare of such a thing. A warm, damp towel, a cup of tea, and plenty of kisses pressed to most parts of your body. He plays with your hair in bed, your head resting against his broad chest, and he enjoys watching you fall asleep with a peaceful and content expression.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

KENTO NANAMI

Kento is hesitant. Not due to a lack of interest, but because he's never done it before. The last thing he wants is to seriously hurt you, and he makes sure the two of you have a nice talk beforehand about letting each other know when it becomes too much. A visual safe "word" is established, and then Kento feels more than comfortable to proceed.

He has strong hands. It'd be easy to hurt you, if he tried, but Kento is as gentle as can be. Especially at first. It's intimate: his hands are everywhere but your neck at first, and it's like he's introducing you to them before he wraps his fingers around your throat and administers a light squeeze.

Even for a well-composed man, Kento's visibly affected by the state of you. The shaky, almost-wheezing breath you let out when he holds onto your neck for the first time, and his hand finds a comfortable, safe grip easily enough. He'd done his research beforehand. He wants you both to enjoy this, and he talks you through it with such kind, sweet words that it makes your head spin.

"You're doing so good, baby. I love the way you feel in my hands. I love making you feel good like this. Do you want to come with me?"

Through and through, Kento is attentive, and your mind spins as he gently fucks you toward a slow, satisfying climax. His hands rarely, if ever, leave your neck. He gives you plenty of breaks, but his hands still linger during them. The pads of his calloused fingers caress your skin, sometimes tracing the shape of your jaw, and his lips can never stay very far away from yours. When you come, it's with his dick buried deep inside you, and his lips against yours to swallow your moans.

He makes you tea, and asks you if you're alright. Gently, he massages your neck. There's barely even a red mark to be seen, but he knows you don't mind the lack of roughness. Maybe, in the future, he'll be more comfortable with it. Right now, he prefers to treat you like fragile porcelain until you build up to more. You fall asleep with your head in his lap, and he reads a few pages of the book he's currently working through as you drift away.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

TOJI FUSHIGURO

It's nothing Toji hasn't done before. If anything, it's tame, and he makes fun of you a little for asking him like that. As if you need to ask me.

Toji is rough, and he fucks you like he's claiming you while his hands grip your neck. It seems wild, but it isn't: he knows when to loosen his grip and let you breathe, and he's paying attention to when it looks like you might be getting close to passing out. There's bruising, clear as day, far before the end of your little session, and you have a feeling your neck won't be the only thing bruised by the end of this with how hard his hips drive against yours. The room fills with the sound of grunts, and choked moans, and skin harshly hitting skin. When Toji speaks, it's low against your ear: You like that, don't you? You wanna get treated rough? Like the slut you are? Want me to break you?

When the two of you come, Toji makes sure his grip on your neck is the tightest it's been. Not a single noise comes out of you, and if you weren't currently barrelling through one of the roughest orgasms of your life, you'd worry he might've fucking broken something. But everything winds down, the two of you panting and drenched in sweat, and while you certainly feel sore, nothing's broken. Thankfully.

The aftercare is a little lazy, if only because Toji gets tired after sex. He can go as many rounds as you want, but if you're done? He's passing out. So while he does give your neck a small rub and gives you a limp pat on the shoulder, he's just as quickly flopping down next to you on the bed and sleeping within the minute.

Oh well. At least it was fun. He'll make you a cup of tea come morning, when he wakes up before you and makes breakfast.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

CHOSO

He doesn't get it. In all honesty, sex is pretty simple for him. You feel good together, get off, and then cuddle for a while. For him, it doesn't need to be any more complicated than that. But you suggest it and, while he doesn't really get it, he's willing to try anything. Though, he does look it up a little first. So he doesn't do it wrong.

Choso is infatuated once he does it, though. He's so painfully aware of your pulse, of the way your blood struggles to travel to your brain, and it makes him hard as a fucking rock. More than that, he looks at your face, and you're loving it. He almost looks nervous as he stares down at you, but you know what that expression means: it just means he's struggling to hold back. That he's probably feeling just as good as you right now, and he's not even being touched.

Of course, he eventually fucks you while he chokes you. How couldn't he? The way you twitch and tighten around him is so unique from the way you do so when you usually have sex, and he's so clearly revelling in this new experience. He's losing himself to it, and you can feel the movements of his hips grow sloppy the further along you two get. Embarrassingly enough, he realises too late that he hasn't kissed you this whole time, and he makes sure to lock lips with you right before his hips stutter and press flush against yours when he comes. He swallows your moan just as you swallow his, and from where your hands have founds their place on his chest, you feel him tremble and fall apart on top of you.

Aftercare is late, tonight. Usually, you don't need much of it. This is the first time you've tried anything on the kinky side of things. Choso's always so overwhelmed when you fuck: he gets too into it, too worked up, and he ends up with his face hidden in the crook of your neck while you play with his hair. When he pulls himself together, though, he takes note of the redness on your neck. I'm sorry. You laugh, and tell him that's normal. Don't worry about it. He takes your word for it. Gets you some tea when you tell him your throat is sore, and he holds you gently to his chest that night, making fall to fall asleep after you.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

#SUGGIE✧; post #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jjk x gn reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #satoru gojo #suguru geto #toji fushiguro #kento nanami #choso #satoru gojo x reader #suguru geto x reader #toji fushiguro x reader #kento nanami x reader #choso x reader #gn reader

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kyhgwts · 2 years

Text

summary: when y/n thinks doms are just assholes and so her best friend Draco teaches her what a real dom is like. (2.4k)

WARNINGS: SMUT! VERY MATURE CONTENT! please do not proceed if you are not mature enough. Dom/Sub, Daddy kink, squirting, rough sex(but like… soft in a way? and AFTERCARE) Unprotected sex(please do not do this😁) (the pictures shown are not meant to be what the reader (or Draco) looks like, just the vibe of the story!!)

PAIRING: Soft!draco x Fem!reader

Ky: did i think of this while masterbating… yes yes i did.

‘Why do you think so?’ he says coming from his bathroom as you were laying on his bed.

‘because they just want an excuse to control a woman and have her all sappy for them while they go and fuck multiple bitches’ you said shrugging, Draco’s jaw dropped.

‘Why do you say that?’ he asks, you look up at him to see his dangerous look.

‘because i’ve been with one? remember?!’ you ask, Draco rolled his eyes.

‘he was not a ‘dom’ y/n. He in fact was just a dickhead’ Draco said, you look at him thoughtfully.

‘well obviously there’s no difference’ you say, Draco snorted.

‘you’ve been with a guy who claimed to be a dom, when hint mother fucking hint he was not. And then you base all of them off that one guy?’ he said curiously, you shrug.

‘i mean what else am i supposed to do? i’ve only ever been with him so…’ you trail off.

‘i’m an asshole then?’ he said, you gave him a confused look.

‘no i didn’t say that’ you say quickly before realizing what he meant. ‘well maybe you are.’ you back yourself up shrugging, he grins.

‘there’s a difference between someone who actually likes to control woman and hurt them than a guy who is actually a dom y/n.’ he said, you roll your eyes.

‘yeah okay, i’ll just have to wait and see then’ you said, he paused your movements.

‘or you don’t have to’ he said with a ‘obvious’ tone.

‘there’s no way in hell i’m letting you fuck me’ you say, he glared at you.

‘wow. what’s that supposed to mean?‘ he said, you just sigh.

‘i don’t know, having sex with your best friend means your not best friends anymore.’ you say, he narrows his eyes.

‘if we say we’re best friends then we are’ he said, you chew at your lip considering it.

For one, you know Draco would never hurt you and for two you could really use some sex right about now.

‘fine’ you say, he stills as if he didn’t think you’d say yes.

‘come on then’ you gesture to his bed, taking off your shirt with no hesitation. He smirks walking over to the bed while taking off his shirt.

‘if after this, you still don’t like it then that means you just don’t like it, it doesn’t mean doms are assholes.’ he said you notice the seriousness in his voice and you nod taking off your shorts you had on.

He was now on top of you and you just knew by that second that he was right. The feeling of him on top of you was so comforting and it felt like warm hug. And as if a switch had changed in him…

‘are you sure?’ his voice was soft, his voice was normally soft towards you different from when he was talking to his other friends but it was never this soft.

‘yeah’ you whispered watching him with curious eyes, it was crazy how he already put you under a spell not even 2minutes into it.

‘do you want me to take off these first or do you want to wait till after i do the other stuff’ he asked, you look in his eyes.

‘other stuff?’ you ask, he gave a look that showed he was disappointed.

It was in that moment that he realized, you deserved so much better than what you had got.

‘foreplay’ he whispered lightly, you just stared at him.

‘i want to keep them on’ you say, testing to see if he would protest against you but he didn’t and you can tell… tell that you were so wrong.

‘ok,’ he said, leaning down to your neck he began to kiss and bite on it making you shudder.

‘are my hands alright?’ he asked, you nodded. His hands were placed on your hips sending a heat to your core.

‘make sure to tell me what you don’t like ok?’ he said, oh… he was much different than your last.

‘ok’ you respond mind hazy and voice breathy.

His mouth traveled down to your exposed breasts since you never really wear bras, he took a nipple into his mouth making you tense and your hands fly to his hair.

A moan you’ve never heard escapes you mouth, you didn’t understand.

‘first off, a dom takes time with you. an asshole just fucks you and leaves. Hence not a real dom’ he said, you nod in understanding.

‘good’ he said, you whimper at the praise before you could catch yourself making him smirk.

His lips travel slowly down till their at your panty line, his hot breath hitting your stomach.

‘Can i take them off?’ he asks, you nod furiously.

‘yes please’ you whispered.

He leans up and hooks his fingers into you panties before pulling them down with the help of you lifting your hips up.

You feel his fingers swipe down your core making you whine, he looks up at you and grins.

His finger enters you making you pull at his hair letting out a moan, he starts to thrust his finger making you squirm.

He works you up until you feel your end, right over the hill. He pulls his finger out of you making you gasp.

‘Draco!’ you freak, he just begins to take off the remainder of his clothes.

You eyes glue to him, quidditch certainly pays off. Genes? maybe his dad has that big of a-

‘red. that’s your safe word, if you want to stop at any point you use the word red. understand?’ he says, you nod.

‘i wont stop unless you use red because i’ll think you like whatever i’m doing, on the other hand if you just don’t like it tell me, alright?’ he says, you nod again.

He pulls you closer to him, and before you can even think he is splitting you open making you cry out his name.

‘I still don’t get it, it seems like you will just use me, your rough you know’ you say, and although you liked it, you just wanted to get him irritated.

‘oh? alright’ he begins to slowly drag himself out and slowly back in making you shudder.

He begins to move in and out making you whimper but he’s going incredibly slow.

‘ugh y-you’re so annoying’ you mumble pushing your hips down, he shakes his head.

‘and you are hard to please because you’re telling me you don’t like something when i know you do.’ he said, you groan.

‘f- fuck you’ you say intending it to come out warning but it came out breathy and whiny.

‘ok… if you really want to’ he shrugged, before you could comprehend anything he was smashing into you, beginning a rough and fast pace.

Your eyes rolled back and you moaned so loud you knew someone had to of heard you, your hands fall from his hair laying limp on either side of your head.

You’re breathing became quick and fast and your mouth hung open, he leaned down to your ear biting at it before talking to you.

‘you really don’t get it huh?’ he said his voice dark and deep, you shake your head.

‘you want to know what a dom is? someone who yes technically likes to take control but it’s because they want to care for you, and make you feel good. They’ll fuck you till you’re limp and crying, and then they’ll give you a hot bath to help with you’re sore limbs’ he says, you listen to his silky voice as he doesn’t stop his assault on you.

‘that’s what you call a manipulator’ you mumble, he lets out a chuckle.

‘remember that safe word i gave you? baby i’m not talking about sad tears i’m talking about good tears, tears because it feels so good.’ he said, you go wide eyed at the name.

‘if at anytime you say red i’ll stop immediately. You have the upper hand not me.’ he says.

‘mhm’ you mumble in understanding, you felt too good to respond, too good to fight.

‘A dom is supposed to make you feel safe under their arms, not scared. They bring you warmth, they’re there to protect you.’ he says, you moan when he hits deeper.

‘I like to be on top, not because i want to boss woman around. Because i want to take care of woman, i want to make you wither and cry because you feel too good to take anymore. And after i’ll put us both in a warm bath to help ease your body. After that i’ll cook you some food, and then i’ll make sure you sleep well.’ he said, the whole thought of what he was saying making you even more wet.

‘How are you feeling baby?’ he says, you whine body shaking.

‘g- good’ you say, he hums pulling your leg and putting it over his shoulder making you go wide eyed and cry.

‘So you do like this? hm? being under me, withering and begging, you like someone to be controlling you and fucking you so good that it hurts’ he said, he was so right and it made you mad.

And something that has been shot down since your last relationship when he said he hated it, something you do without noticing. Something you knew you had but kept it a dirty secret.

‘daddy’ you moan, you freeze in his hold. He could tell you didn’t mean to let it slip, and he smirked to himself.

‘yes baby?’ he says, and you absolutely melt into him. It’s like he was meant for you, you knew you wouldn’t be able to be just friends after this.

‘oh god,’ you whine, pushing your hips down to meet his. Your hands spread wide and close then spread wide again, grabby hands as you would say. You needed something to hold.

He noticed your gesture grabbing both hands and linking them with his own slamming them down onto the mattress, above your head.

‘ugh’ you throw your head further into the mattress, whole body tensing waiting for your release.

‘a dom is supposed to stay loyal to their sub, and they are supposed to care and love for you.’ he whispered into your ear, his voice hoarse but still so soft.

‘do you understand now love?’ he said, you nod your head furiously.

‘yes! yes! i do’ you shout, he was so close to your lips.

‘draco’ you whine trying to move your head up but failing miserably, he stares at your lips before crashing his own onto them.

His arm moved down to hold under your stomach keeping you stable as he fucked you into the sheets, his other hand then grabbed both of your hands pinning them above your head.

You make a audible noise that you’ve never even heard out of yourself before, he smirks into the kiss backing away ever so slightly.

‘you’re very whiny’ he said, you furrow your brows moving your head up to catch his lips not caring.

‘I’m close’ you whimper when he hits a certain spot in you.

‘I know baby, let it go. Cum for daddy’ he says right in your ear making you groan.

‘oh my-‘ your whole body tensed locking all your limbs, your held your breath in anticipation.

‘AH FUCK!’ you cry out as you came, he didn’t stop though.

‘come on give me another one’ he whispered, you shook your head.

‘i can’t!’ you whine, he gave you a stern look before hitting deeper and faster making your mouth hang open and your eyes roll back.

‘you can y/n.’ he said, you whimper squeezing his hand.

Your vision begins to go blurry and your body shivers when you let out your release, but there was a new sensation and you didn’t know till you saw Draco’s lower half wet.

You go wide eyed, and he just laughs at your reaction.

‘good’ he says, you moan at the praise once again and he knows that you’re a praise freak.

you feel him shoot his cum into you riding out his high your body twitches.

‘no no too sensitive!’ you plea, he shushes you falling on top of you making sure he didn’t crush you.

You were too tired to talk, and so was he. The silence was comforting.

You feel his arms picking you up and you whine, you were too tired.

‘i’ve got you’ you could hear it from somewhere.

somehow you ended up in a hot tub with a body behind you, who washed you off. Your mind was hazy, and you couldn’t think straight.

‘where are you baby?’ you hear whispered, you hum.

‘i’m here just too tired to talk’ you mumble, he kisses the back of your neck making you melt further into him.

‘you know… i’ve never felt this way after sex, like i can’t think straight i just want to curl in a ball and sleep’ you whisper, he lets out a soft laugh.

‘Hm… so how’s your opinion now?’ he asked, you snort.

‘i think you know’ you say, he grinned.

‘you sleeping here tonight?’ he asked, you nod.

And once you both get out wrapped in fresh warm clothes and new sheets and blankets, you relish in the fact of how safe and comforted you felt. His arm holding you close and his nose nuzzled into your neck.

‘goodnight, love ya’ you whisper throwing your hand back and tapping his head full of hair.

‘goodnight i love you’ he whispered back, but you knew and he knew that you knew, that ‘i love you’ was different from all the rest.

You guys have been best friends since you were little so ‘love you’ was thrown around all the time, because it was true you did love each other. But ‘i love you’ was a whole different meaning it meant that he loved you.

‘i love you’ you whisper back knowing he wanted to hear it.

A/N: pov me being a die hard sub bitch😰🤞and i think this is my new favorite one shot i’ve made… IT MAKES ME MELT.

#draco lucius malfoy #draco x y/n #draco imagine #soft!draco malfoy #smut is life #fluff #foryou #draco malfoy smut #dom/sub #big dick draco🤞#wait did i mention smut?#i’m horrible at this

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fizzigigsimmer · 2 months

Text

I’m in my Billy feelings and I need comfort. So have some fluff.

Billy’s not the anxious one. At least not outwardly. That’s all Harrington. It’s like Steve’s on overflow - when it’s good you know it cause he’s all over you. Touching, kissing, fucking tickle fights like they’re eight years old. He’s in Billy’s space 24-7. Plays it off like ‘I study better with you there’ and ‘I was just in the neighborhood so I thought I’d climb through your fucking window.’ Jesus. And when it’s bad - when things are off - Steve’s the one who panics like some pussy bitch. Checking in half a dozen times, overcompensating with all the bullshit games that are just an excuse to touch and sappy together time. In a different place and time, Billy would have really hurt him with it. He doesn’t say it but Billy hears it, the stay stay stay, love me, love me, love me. Harrington’s bent up and bruised inside and Wheeler’s only partly to blame for it. Steve knows it too.

Harrington worries he’s too much, but they kind of balance each other out because Billy - he worries he’s not enough. He worries with every absent streak and shrug of his shoulder, every ‘Whatever, I don’t care what we do’ or ‘Grow some balls and pick Harrington, it’s not like it’s a date’, that one day Steve will realize this fragile thing between them- that isn’t a fucking relationship but Billy still can’t wake up another morning without- is not enough for him. Secretive fucks and handjobs by the quarry are not enough for anyone. And isn’t that Billy all over - selfish.

He’s trying to be better these days about the selfish part. He can’t think in terms of permanency because he can barely think in terms of tomorrow, but he knows he wants tomorrow to look like today. Like bumming cigarettes that Steve swears he’s given up, and pushing smoke between his lips. Like milkshakes and burgers and, he still can’t believe it, fucking tickle fights! Like Steve, and this flat earth backwater town. And maybe someday - a mercurial thing like all his dreams - like the rock of waves and a board beneath their bodies, hands intertwined to keep from drifting.

Billy is not the anxious one. Not outwardly. But sometimes when Harrington is doing his whole thing - yapping about something dumb one of the kids did or some new music video on MTV, smiling and smirking, and knocking knees beneath the table - Billy will grab his hand. Just to have it. Just to feel the flutter of Steve’s pulse in his wrist. Won’t say a damn thing - his glare warning off anyone who might comment on it. Steve never does after the first time. Barely even pauses in his conversation.

Just turns his wrist over, until their fingers brush and then tangle. Until they intertwine.

#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington

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brownskinlemon · 3 months

Text

Deal (d.f.)

pairings: dom/reader

word count: 4,061

summary: You've never experienced the big O, and a night with your best friend Dominic turns into more than you planned

warnings: smutty smut, mentions of smoking, unprotected s3x, cr3ampie, multiple orgasms, some sappy emotions

authors note: this is my first ever story, and I hope you all enjoy :)

!! do not repurpose or repost as your own for any reason on any platform without credit !!

The shuffling of feet was all that could be heard as you and your best friend Dominic paced the grocery store aisles. It was nearly midnight, the store getting ready to close soon. The munchies had taken over earlier in the night, which led you two to an hour's journey around this store, baskets full of junk food in both your hands.

“Y/N…bro” You turned back to his mouth agape, eyes fixated on a mega-sized Ben n Jerry’s tin. He toyed with his lip between his teeth for a moment, before swinging the door open and obnoxiously tossing it into his already overflowing basket.

You snorted quietly to yourself, quickly turning back around before you ended up staring at his pink lips for far too long for your own comfort, far too long to be considered platonic admiration.

The streets of Naples were empty and dim, headlights dancing across you in the passenger seat of Dominic’s car as you sped down a main road. Your eyes were glued to the moonlight dancing across the thrashing waves across the shore out of your window.

“So beautiful” He mumbled to himself.

“ I know right?” You responded without looking at him. Your head whipped around to him, surprised to find his brown eyes already fixated on you, making your heart drop suddenly.

He coughed to himself, straightening up in his seat and turning his attention back to the road, his lips once again being caught in between his lips. Those perfect fucking lips.

With his looks he could easily have every girl in Naples on a leash, but chooses not to, you never understood why. You would like to think he had commitment issues, but it seemed to be pure disinterest in dating at all. You had been friends since middle school, and though you had been in so many friends and “relationships”, your friendship stayed the same. As close as you had been, there were lines you wouldn’t dare to cross. These lines became blurry in your mind as of late. His figure, eyes,lips, voice had all been so…enchanting recently. Staying up till late overthinking every little interaction was excruciating to say the least. You’d rather die than let him know a word of it.

You snuck glances at him as his ring-clad fingers drummed on the steering wheel to whatever song was currently on. His apartment came into view, and he skillfully maneuvered into the parking deck. After he parked, you hopped out, grabbing the 7 bags worth of snacks you had bought earlier.

“You really think we can actually eat all this?” You huffed as you made your way down the hall to his apartment.

“ I know I can, especially that ice cream.” He nodded, a small smirk pulling lightly on his face.

“Ok so out of all of them, who was the best in bed?” Dom quipped, eyes fixated on the rolling tray in front of him on the bed, hands skillfully pearling one of several blunts that night.

You were both clad in a hoodie and pajamas, sitting on his bed. A fiery orange light danced across the dim room from a lamp, “Who Hurt You?” by Daniel Caesar playing lightly in the background.

“Hm…maybe that one soccer guy. But he did the bare minimum and didn’t even make me cum.”

“Well at least you’re able to get yourself off right? Who needs em anyway.”

“Yeah…” you trailed off quietly, eyes locked on your fiddling hands which had now become the most interesting thing in the world. You could see him stop his actions out of your peripheral vision.

“Y/N”

“Dom”

“No way you’ve never…finished? Like ever in your 20 years?”

You sighed, eyes squeezing together. “I have not.”

Tears begin to burn at the brim of your eyes, threatening to fall with each second of embarrassing silence that follows. Sure you had discussed…sex,all bestfriends do, but there were lines you didn’t want to cross. Dom knowing about your lack of ability to orgasm was one of those lines.

Without looking up at him you jumped up, rushing past him to the bathroom across the hall, slamming the door behind you. You sighed deeply as you leaned on the counter, locking in on your eyes in your reflection that were reddened, caused partially by both the weed and your now falling tears. It didn’t help that weed always made everything you felt even more intense.

“Get it together. It’s not that serious.” You repeated like a mantra quietly until a heavy knock interrupted your thoughts.

“Y/N come out…I didn’t mean to make you cry.” You couldn’t see him but you knew he was doing that thing where he tapped his feet when he got nervous or worried.

You nibbled on your bottom lip, pausing in the silence.

“You didn’t- I mean- you didn’t Dom. Shit’s just embarrassing.”

“There’s no point in being embarrassed. Why would I care if you’re not like a sex god or something. In fact that’s pretty normal for women to have that..blockage you know?”

You chuckled lightly to yourself, amused at the way his version of comforting you. You breathed out loudly, nodding to yourself in the mirror before swinging the door open to find Dominic leaning on the doorway, running right into his chest.

You were taken off guard as his arms wrapped around you, your tense shoulders relaxing as you embraced him back.

“You ok?”

“Yeah..don’t rub it in.” You said muffled into his chest.

His arms loosened around you as his tall frame loomed over you. His brown eyes bore into yours from above, rendering you silent. You watched as his eyes snuck a glance at your lips, quickly snapping back up to your eyes.

“Y/N…I-”

Before he could get a word out you moved around him, walking into his room and turning over your shoulder.

“That blunt and ice cream won’t finish itself Dom!”

You watched him smirk to himself, shaking his head as he made his way back into his room with you

After several blunts and snacks, you two found yourselves wrapped up in blankets on your second movie of the night: The Breakfast Club.

“This movie is amazing.” You quipped up with a mouth full of ice cream, eyes not leaving the screen. You heard him hum in agreement, eyes sneaking a quick glance at him as he leaned back, shifting his hips underneath his blanket. My god, if I was on that lap I would-

“Y/N”

“Dom” Your eyes were glued to the screen as you pretended to be completely invested in the film, and not as invested as you were intently ignoring whatever conversation he was about to start.

“About earlier…you know I’m not good with emotional sappy conversations so..bear with me...” He trailed off, pausing the movie with the remote and forcing you to find another object in the room to fixate on.

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry they didn’t..care enough to make sure you were good. I know I clown on you alot but you don’t deserve that shit.”

His hand gently made its way under your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“You hear me?” His eyes searched yours valiantly.

“Yes.” You breathed out, freezing at how intense his gaze fanned over your features.

His eyes dropped to where he began to cup your hands gently in his, as your eyes followed. You two were never touchy, and the frequency of physical touch tonight was stoking the already intense fire that was stirring in you for him.

“Fingers crossed the next man that gets the honor of touching you is caring, and gives your body the respect it deserves. Hm?”

“Fingers crossed” you said quietly, trying to hide your breath that was now ragged from the little contact.

You looked up at him, surprised to find his eyes already fixated on you. His teeth caught on his full bottom lip, his chest heaving silently. The lighting in the room, combined with the way his hair fell over his face made your body run warm. The sweet smell of his cologne mixed with weed filled your lungs and made you dizzy with desire from how close you were sitting.

Fuck it.

“Dom”

“Y/N?”

You leaned over quickly, smashing your lips into his. It took him no time to connect your lips, hands snaking around your waist. A moment later, you pulled away, leaning your forehead against his, eyes filled with desire as they met his.

“What was that for?” He breathed in and out, attempting to catch his breath.

“I…I want to try it…with you.” Your voice faltered as your sentence went on.

“It? What’s it?”

“Sex.”

His eyes danced back and forth between yours searching for any doubt.

Your hands covered your face. “Its okay if you don’t we can go to bed and pretend like this never happened I just-”

You were cut off by his lips smashing into yours again, and he flipped you two over so he was hovering on top of you. His hips grinded into the heat between your legs as they wrapped around him . You whined into the kiss from the friction as he pulled back, his hand placed under your chin.

“Are you sure you want this? With me I mean?”

“Yes Dom. Please. I need you.” you whimpered out as you grind your hips up into his to emphasize your point.

A quiet groan fell from his lips. “If you ever…and I mean ever want to stop you tell me okay? I want you too but this is about you. I want you to feel good but I need you to let me know what you need more or less of. Deal?”

You nodded silently, eyes boring into his.

“Words Y/N.”

“Yes- I mean deal” tumbled from your lips that had already begun to darken from his kiss.

He chuckled to himself, diving back in to connect your lips again. His lips danced their way from your mouth, across your jaw, and down your neck, deciding on a particularly sensitive spot to mark. Your breath began to waiver and small whimpers caught in your throat as his mouth left marks across your neck, surely to be a sickening purple in the morning.

“You sound even prettier than I had imagined.” He whispered near your ear, making your stomach turn in the most amazing way.

As he continued his attack on your neck, his long fingers began to toy with the hem of your hoodie, dipping his hands underneath to run his hands up your stomach.

“May I?” He asked, referring to your hoodie that had been pushed above your stomach by now.

“You may.” You smiled shyly at him as he gently pushed your hoodie off your body, exposing your baby pink bra to him . He met you in your bareness, leaning back to pull his hoodie over his head. Your teeth bit down on your bottom lip at the sight of his chest, the sharpness of his abs that were littered with tattoos had made you clench your legs together in a fever of need.

He leaned back into you, finding his place once again between your legs as his lips kissed across your chest.

“Arch up for me” He muttered.

You obeyed, arching your back up as he unclipped your bra with his free hand, sliding it off you gently. A gasp from your lips broke the thick silence in the room as his lips gently wrapped around your nipple, his large hand twisting your other nipple gently in his hand. Your hands rushed to loop into his unruly curls.

He continued his descent down your abdomen, leaving open mouthed kisses on his path until he reached the waistline of your pajamas. He sat up, kissing your forehead as he massaged your hips.

“Lift up.” He breathed out. Your hips lifted in response as he pulled down your pajamas in one swift motion. He toyed with the hem of your panties, eyes catching onto yours as you stared at him.

“Remember our deal okay?” His eyebrows raised.

“Okay.” You responded shakily. Although you were not a virgin, the line you were crossing was enough to leave you in shock. You had reached a point beyond return and there was something about the sheer size of the tent in his pants that did not lend to not being overcome with nervousness.

He hooked his ring clad fingers into the loop of your panties, pulling them down gently. He sat back on his knees, admiring you completely bare to him, your body running hot from his gaze.

“Good god you are so beautiful..” He shook his head in disbelief. You looked up at your best friend, and saw everything that love could offer in human form. It was almost comical how whipped he had you from a few touches. He slid down between your legs, flat on his stomach and wrapping his arms around your thighs.

He peppered open mouth kisses and hickeys between your thighs, getting dangerously close to where you needed him most. He blew a cool stream of air over your clit, causing you to jolt your hips trying to chase some type of sensation, in response he pushes your hips down gently, readjusting his grip on you.

“Relax baby, I got you” He quipped before suddenly wrapping his lips around your center. A silent moan lodged in your throat at the sudden contact. He began to work over you with his tongue, humming in pleasure as your moan finally released from your chest, echoing in his small room.

Your hands searched the bed wildly for something to hold onto, one of your hands settling deep in his curls while the other gripped tightly on his bicep. You grinded up into his grip, breath labored and laced with ongoing whimpers. Just then, Dominic pulled back from you, earning a whine of frustration from your needy lips.

“Shh…I’m gonna add a finger now, okay?” He asked gently. You nodded fervently, desperate for him to touch you. Your body tensed as his digit slid into you easily thanks to the wetness that had pooled between your legs. He thrusted gently, making your mouth fall open as he repeatedly brushed over your g-spot.

“Can you add a second?” You labored out through heavy breaths.

He silently obliged, sliding a second finger gently inside of you, earning him a gasp and a mantra of his name tumbling from your lips like a broken record. A high pitched sound that he had never heard before left your bruised lips as he returned his mouth to your clit while still pumping his fingers into you.

Everything felt more intense, and it was making you dizzy. You felt pleasure running through your veins, making your eyes roll back and your nails dig into his bicep. Your hips jolted up and in response Dom wrapped his hands tightly around your thighs, locking you in his grip and keeping you from moving. You felt an unfamiliar coil in your stomach, and it was almost too much for you to handle.

“Dom I-I can’t” You whined out through eyes that were squeezed closed, attempting to loosen his grip on you and run from the intensity that he had built up between your legs.

“Yes” He peppered in between kisses on your center, his fingers not letting up their pace. “You can. That’s an orgasm baby, I know you can get there for me. Breathe.”

It was almost like your body was programmed to his words, because just then the coil in your abdomen had snapped. Your vision went white and you could hear nothing but your own pulse in your ears, you were sure you could faintly hear Dom’s voice in the distance. A surge of pure unadulterated pleasure rushed through you, paralyzing you in his grip while rendering you speechless except for the screams of his name that echoed in the tiny room.

As you came down, you slowly opened your eyes to find Dominic staring at you with the goofiest smile one could muster. He looked so innocent as if he wasn’t covered in your juices and hadn’t just performed witchcraft between your legs that were still shaking.

“Dom, what the fuck.” You heaved out.

“I know right?” He quipped while massaging your hips. He leaned over to kiss your forehead.”Do you still wanna continue? I know that was…a lot, or at least it seemed like it was. I don’t wanna push you too far if not.” Your eyes raked over his frame, nodding enthusiastically.

Your confirmation was all it took for him to remove his pajama pants in one swift movement. He followed by slowly removing his boxers, groaning as his dick sprung free from its confines. Your mouth fell agape. You had always had a guess that he was well endowed, and yes he was, but you never thought that a dick could be..pretty?

“Don’t stare, it makes me nervous.” He mocked with a small chuckle, earning a small exhausted smile from you. He found his place between your legs, his dick rubbing lightly between your wet folds, making you both groan. His free hand dipped between your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“Let me know if you want me to stop, okay? I never wanna make you feel anything other than good. Deal?”

“Deal” You nodded. He pecked your lips, dropping his head to look at where you two connected between your legs. He massaged his tip lightly between your folds, letting his tip gently slip inside, as you held your breath and his own ran shakily. Your eyes squeezed together and your hands gripped his biceps.

“Breathe, don’t go blue on me baby.”

You tried to remember how to breathe, but all you could think about was the delicious feeling of him gently stretching you out. His thrusts stayed slow as he practiced getting deeper and deeper until your hips met each other. You arched your chest up until it met his tip as his tip began to massage deeply against your g-spot.

In no time, he had worked up to a decent pace after you gave him the okay, your body running hotter than ever as he worked into you while latching his lips onto your already decorated neck. The room felt like it was spinning in the best way, and the groans he elicited into your neck made you wanna explode. You were ripped out of your trance after he suddenly pulled out and flipped you onto your stomach.

“Dom what are you-” Your sentence was interrupted as the feeling of a cold liquid ran up your spine from base to tip. You whined at the sudden temperature change, whimpering as the cold was replaced with his warm mouth that had begun indulging in the ice cream off of your back.

“Tasted even better off of you than I imagined.” he commented, following his words with immediately slipping back into you completely, snatching your already ragged breath out of your chest for the thousandth time that night. Your nails clawed into the sheets under you, searching for a grip to cope with the rush of pleasure that had overtaken your body. He trailed his hands up your torso and arms, stopping at your hands as he interlinked your fingers with his own, not relenting on his pace inside of you.

The room was filled with the melody of your collective moans paired with the harsh colliding of your ass into his hips. A thin blanket of sweat covered both your bodies, and once again he had brought you to a point where you were thrashing underneath his touch.

The whispers near your ear were driving you insane, and he began snaking his hand down around you and between your legs, using the wetness there that had pooled to his advantage. His fingers were now circling your sensitive bundle of nerves. That familiar coil tightened again in your lower abdomen, leaving you biting down into the pillow and arching up into his thrusts.

“You think you can be a good girl and give me a second one?” He toyed.

All that left your mouth was a string of desperate whines.

“I can’t hear you baby…” He trailed off, thrusting particularly deep at the end of his words, leaving your mouth agape.

“I..I can’t…too much”You forced out between moans.

“I think…” He increased his pace between your hips and rubbed deliciously fast around your clit “You can.”

Your eyes squeezed together as he relentlessly worked at the coil that had tightened beyond belief in your abdomen. His lips trailed up your ear, and soon that coil had snapped, making your legs lock and a string of incoherent moans tumble from your lips as he brought you to your peak for the second time that night.

“Fucking hell…” He groaned at the sight of you coming undone and the way you were relentlessly clenching down on him. He pumped a few more strokes, pushing one last time into you to a hilt until you felt his warm release pooling your insides.

He suddenly pulled out, making both of you gasp. You were flat on the bed now, eyes fluttering as you felt the bed dip and his footsteps leave the room. You looked over your shoulder, wondering where he had trailed off to with such urgency. You heard the water run in the bathroom and he returned moments later with a warm wet washcloth.

“You think you can flip onto your back for me?” He asked as he stood above you.

“Mhm” You begrudgingly obliged. “What are you doing?”

“Cleaning you up duh” He said, shaking his head.

He spread your legs, trailing the washcloth down to your stomach and thighs. He gently brushed it over your center and beyond, earning a whine from you at the sensitivity.

“Shh I know, but you quite literally made a mess. And I hate to be that guy, but you’re gonna have to come pee baby” he cooed, earning a groan from you. He stood up, slipping on his pajamas before lifting you up and placing his oversized hoodie over you, flooding your nose with his scent. He suddenly lifted you up into his arms. You felt him walking out the room, placing you down on the toilet making your feet come in contact with the cold tile.

He leaned up against the counter, looking down at you with a big dopey smile as you waited for your center to stop pulsing so you could pee.

“You’re just gonna, stand there and watch me?” You quipped, raising your eyebrow.

“Yeah unfortunately, for you.” He fake sighed.

A moment of comfortable silence passed before you broke it suddenly with your thoughts.

“Dom that was…I didn’t know I could…that it could feel like that.” You shook your head in disbelief before continuing. “I thought I was like..broken.”

He smiled softly before leaning over to kiss your forehead. “You did great. And you know, I’d like to think I know a few things.” You snorted in response to his cockyness.

After you had finished and gotten cleaned up, you stumbled your way back to the bedroom with his help, flopping onto the bed.

He brought the covers over you, tucking you in and sliding up behind you to hold your frame to his chest.

“Y/N…I love you.” He whispered, in a tone that made you understand that he wasn’t just saying that as your best friend.

“I love you too.” You hummed contently.

“I know this is probably a weird time to ask seeing as you actively have a little of me leaking out of you..but…” His voice ran shaky “Would you…and I understand if not I just wanted..for you to be my girlfriend.

You turned in his arms, eyes searching for any sign of a joke, to no avail. “Deal.” You smirked at him, knowing he understood.

“Deal.” He kissed you, smiling into the kiss, before you turned back into his arms. His curls tickled your neck as he feathered tender kisses down your neck before he finally settled in the pillow and fell asleep.

#dominic fike smut #dominic fike #naples #fanfic #first blog

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cinnamostar · 5 months

Text

02: self-fulfilling prophecy

part one.

pairing : jisung x gn!reader

summary : han jisung, the man who is incapable of maintaining a relationship for more than a few months. han jisung, the man who is in complete denial that maybe he is the problem. han jisung, the man who has convinced himself he isn’t meant for love.

wc : 4.6k

cw : not proof read, nonidol!au, angsty, sad, discusses insecurities in romance, sappiness, very dialogue heavy

a/n : if you haven't read part one, pls do! i hope you guys enjoy part two :') i didn't have a p2 planned when i originally wrote this, so i hope this is still good and an ending you guys will be happy with! <3 as always feedback is appreciated

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Tears rolled down your cheeks as you exited Jisung’s apartment building, your body on the verge of collapsing as your emotions choked your breathing, your heart feeling as if it had just fallen and shattered inside your chest. Each breath you took caused the emotional pressure on your chest to hurt more, feeling as if your airways had been constricted by your own agony.

The dreary, rainy weather matched your mood as your legs carried you into the direction of Minho’s apartment, knowing it was the only place close enough for you to walk to at this time of night. The rain began to strengthen, the drops attacking your skin as your hair and clothes soaked it all up, a cold wind causing your body to shiver as you stumbled up the steps to Minho’s apartment. Your fists hurriedly knocked against the door, hoping Minho would somehow be able to sense the urgency behind it as your lips trembled in a poor attempt to stifle your cries.

Minho opened his door, his eyes widened at the sight of your distressed face, grabbing your hand and pulling you inside his home without a second thought, “Y/N? What happened? Are you okay?”

You tried to respond, but all that came out of your mouth was a gut wrenching sob, your body finally deciding to give up on maintaining appearances as you conceded to the stabbing pain your heart just suffered.

Minho stood there with panic rising in his body as he tried to piece together what could’ve left you in this state, unsure on how to comfort you in this moment. “Hey, it’s okay now, I’m here. Why don’t you take a shower and I’ll let you borrow some clothes? I’ll make you some tea in the meantime and then we can talk.”

You nodded thankfully at Minho, sniffling as he led you to the bathroom, handing you a bag to place your drenched clothes in, as well as a neatly folded pile of fresh clothes and a towel.

You entered the shower, letting the water warm your shivering body that had just been brutalized by the cold rain. Your tense muscles slowly began to relax under the heat of the water, giving you a much needed respite from the weight of your emotions. Despite the momentary calm the shower gave you, tears still escaped your eyes, blending in with the water that cascaded from the showerhead.

After drying yourself and changing into the clothes Minho had given you, you found him sitting at the kitchen table with two mugs of tea waiting to be drunk. He smiled when he noticed you approaching, almost relieved to see how significantly calmer you had looked. As you sat down, he slid one of the mugs towards you, motioning for you to take a drink.

“Did the shower help?”

You brought the mug to your face, blowing it gently to cool it down while nodding, “It did, thank you,” tears still pricking the corners of your eyes.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

You placed the mug down on the table, taking in a sharp inhale as your chest tightened at his question as you recalled Jisung’s words, tears, once again, making their presence known. You did your best to get through your words, but your quivering voice revealed the hurt you were experiencing, “Well, I was with Jisung before I came…”

You squeezed your eyes shut in a feeble attempt to hold back a sob, “And I thought everything was fine, but out of nowhere,” you tried to rush through your sentence, but the overwhelming anguish you were feeling took control as you began to bawl.

Minho instinctively reached for your hand that was resting on the table, rubbing his thumb on your hand to soothe you, “Take your time, we have all night if you need, okay?”

Taking a few more moments to collect yourself, you continued on, “Out of nowhere, he told me he didn't think we were going to work and I… I don’t know, I just left. I feel so stupid right now,” you cried, your eyes puffing up from all the tears you were shedding.

Minho remained quiet for a moment, confused at his best friend’s actions while trying to find the right words, “Did he say why?”

You sighed while shaking your head, feeling guilty that you had let your panicked mind take control of you in that moment, “N-no, I didn’t even give him the chance, I just… Left… I don’t know, I just didn’t want to hear it. It was only going to make me feel worse and it just felt like he led me on, like all the rumors were true,” you weeped, “I should’ve listened to Hyunjin and Seungmin.”

“I’m sorry Y/N, it must’ve been a lot to take in at once,” he spoke softly, still leaving a comforting hand atop of yours, “But I don’t think you’re stupid, there’s nothing wrong with taking a chance at love.��

“I don’t know, I’m just really sad right now.”

“That’s okay, you’re allowed to be. Is there anything I can do that would help you? Do you want me to call anyone over? Get you something to eat?”

You sniffled, nodding your head, “Could you see if Hyunjin and Seungmin can come over? But please tell them what happened, I don’t wanna say it again.”

“Of course, I’ll do that right now.”

“And can you check on Jisung? He was… he was crying a lot when I left. I want to make sure he’s okay too.”

Minho smiled, “Okay, I’ll have the boys come over and then I’ll head over to his place once they get here. Sounds good?”

You nodded, feeling grateful for Minho’s kindness and patience, but also relieved to know that Jisung would have someone to talk to soon enough.

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Minho lightly knocked on the door of Jisung’s apartment, anxiously waiting for the younger boy to open the door, his phone in hand ready to call if he took too long. From the other side of the door, he could hear hurried footsteps scramble towards the door as Jisung swung the door open, his face red and swollen from crying.

Jisung’s eyes widened in surprise and confusion, the hope he had in his eyes disappearing, “Minho? What are you doing here? I thought you were Y/N-”

“That’s why I’m here.”

“Huh?”

“They showed up to my place crying and told me what happened.”

“Oh,” Jisung’s face fell into a somber expression as he tried to stammer out an explanation, “Look, listen, please don’t be mad-”

Minho shook his head, letting himself in and gestured to Jisung to follow him in as he sat on the couch, “I’m not mad, I’m worried.”

Jisung gulped, unsure where this conversation was leading as he sat next to Minho, his brain exhausted from the millions of emotions he had been flipping through.

“Jisung, I thought you loved Y/N-”

“I do! I really do, I love them more than anything and anyone, I know that for a fact,” he sighed heavily as he felt his heart tremble in his chest, the pit of guilt growing deeper and deeper, “But I’m scared, I’m really scared.”

Minho let out a deep breath as he ran his hands through his hair, perplexed at his best friend’s words, “Of what exactly?”

“Of hurting them! Of not meeting their expectations, failing them, all of it. I’ve never been a good partner in the past, everyone knows this,” he muttered out each word with shame, “And I just didn’t want to ruin their image of me, I didn’t want to risk hurting them like I’ve done to everyone else… They’d be much happier if we were just friends.”

Jisung tried to blink away his tears, struggling to put in everything he was thinking into a coherent string of words as he nervously scanned Minho’s face, trying to figure out what the older boy was feeling.

“Okay, I can see where you’re coming from, but didn’t you just hurt them anyway? Didn’t you just do the opposite of what you wanted to?”

Jisung stood silent for a moment, not being able to deny any of Minho’s words, “Well, yes, but it was for the best. It’s better to end it now than later because it would hurt more then, right? I would rather hurt them like this than fail them as a partner.”

“I say this with all the love in the world, but Jisung, you’re being an idiot.”

The two stared at each other, waiting for one to make a move. On one end, Minho was hoping Jisung would be able to realize the stupidity in his behavior, while on the other, Jisung was completely dumbfounded and awaited Minho to further explain himself.

Realizing Jisung was too wrapped up in his own thoughts, Minho continued on, “Jisung, look. Everyone knows how much you love Y/N, okay? It’s so obnoxiously obvious, plus I’ve never seen you be so caring and attentive to anyone before. Clearly, they hold a special place in your heart, right?”

Jisung nodded timidly, letting out a small hum in agreement as that was all he could manage while he silently wept.

“It’s okay to be afraid, especially with what you’re struggling with, but just because you’re afraid doesn’t give you the right to make that decision for Y/N,” Minho leaned forward as he looked into Jisung’s eyes as he tried to convey the importance of his message, “Did you even think to consider how Y/N would feel? They know about your past, Jisung. Even Hyunjin warned them about you, but you know what? They still took that risk with you, and you were quickly proving them wrong before now.”

Minho sighed once more, “Jisung, it’s okay to be afraid, but you cannot make every decision so selfishly when there are other people involved. Y/N isn’t dumb, but they like you and want to take that chance with you. They like you despite your insecurities and flaws. You should’ve told them how you were feeling, but most importantly, they’re allowed to make their own choices. Let them choose to love you, don’t take that away from them.”

Wiping his tears away with his hands, Jisung jutted out his bottom lip in a pout as he sniffled, “They… they probably hate me now, I think it’s best I leave them alone.”

Minho rolled his eyes as he got up from the couch, still looking at Jisung, “Jisung, why don’t you stop assuming things for other people and find out from them directly?”

“But-”

“Y/N told me to check on you because they were worried. Just talk to them. If you truly love them, you’ll talk to them.”

With hands in his pockets, Minho made his way to the front door, “I have to go home, but you better talk to them. I’ll be really disappointed in you if you don’t.”

After Minho’s sentence, all that followed was the sound of the door shutting and the soft cries of Jisung, who was being eaten up by both guilt and anxiety, fearing how angry his friends must be at him. Part of him felt relieved that Minho was the first person he spoke to as his words brought him some sort of comfort, yet the overwhelming remorse and humiliation roared loudly in his mind.

Doubt and confusion lingered in him as he processed Minho’s words, unsure if you’d even be willing to talk to him after this. In his world, he thought after the hurt he had just inflicted on you, he was even less deserving of you. His irrational behavior and his instinct to react based on his fears and insecurities served as more proof that he was not fit for a relationship, that you were better off with someone who had a better grasp of who they were and what they wanted.

Yet, while he thought what he was doing was for your benefit, he hadn’t considered once how you’d feel and how this would impact you, especially considering how you both were practically acting like a couple at this point. Especially after he told you he needed more time, but then completely flipped that on its head and left you out in the cold with no real explanation. Minho was right, he was only thinking of himself, this wasn’t him being merciful and saving you from him, this was entirely him avoiding to confront himself. He was fleeing his own vulnerability and masked under some sort of self-righteous sacrifice for you. Much like in the past, he allowed his own selfishness to blind him from reality of his emotions and actions, but at least he was somewhat aware of it.

While Jisung cannot find it in him to forgive himself, he wondered and hoped whether you would, whether you’d look past his mistakes once more and accept him for who he was. He prayed silently that you’d still give him the chance he so desperately craved, yet so foolishly pushed away in the name of fear, wishing you’d still choose him when he didn’t know how to do that himself. Maybe what he needed all along was your neverending affection to finally learn how to love the parts of himself he hated, maybe he needed your gentle hand to guide him through love, maybe he should’ve trusted you while he learned to trust himself again. Just maybe, he would be able to learn what love was truly about if he had just listened to his heart, not his own negative self-hating mind.

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Meanwhile, an extremely rageful Hyunjin and Seungmin sat with you on Minho’s couch as they tried to comfort you in sweet, hushed voices, doing their absolute best to keep their anger to themselves. Hyunjin held you in a tight hug as you cried into his chest, his chin resting on top of your head as a comforting hand rubbed your back in gentle circles. Despite the kindness of his actions, his face was a stark contrast as a scowl painted over his features, mentally cursing at himself for letting you get involved with Jisung and not doing a better job at deterring you from it.

Seungmin, on the other hand, was holding back as he bit his tongue, keeping any thought he had to himself because he knew if he opened his mouth, a fountain of expletives would pour out. He knew the last thing you needed right now was him speaking poorly of Jisung, even though he thought he deserved every angry world he had in his arsenal right now.

Through gritted teeth, Hyunjin softly mumbled, “I’m sorry, Y/N, this isn’t fair to you. You deserve better than that.”

Hiccuping, you whispered, “But I don't want anyone else, I still want him even if he’s being a stupid idiot.”

“Well, he made his choices. A bad one, but all you can do is move forward from it,” he sighed, silently communicating with Seungmin through indignant looks.

All Seungmin could do was hum in agreement, not trusting himself enough to keep his thoughts to himself as he cracked his fingers in frustration, thinking about how he was going to rip Jisung a new one the next time he saw him.

The front door clicked open, signaling that Minho had gotten back which caused you to sit up from Hyunjin’s embrace as you looked at Minho, tears staining your cheeks. The sight of your face had only made the flames of anger flicker more, serving as the perfect fuel for his seething body.

“Before you ask, yes, he’s okay,” Minho ressaured you as he made his way to the living room, shooting both Seungmin and Hyunjin a warning look as the two boys quickly hid their vexed expressions from you. You gave Minho a grateful smile as you, for the nth time that night, wiped your tears away.

“I talked to him too, he’s probably going to message you sometime tomorrow to talk things over if you’re open to that.”

You were about to respond, but Seungmin spoke before you could, “Is that a good idea?”

Minho glared at him, “Seungmin, think before you speak.”

Seungmin shrugged, choosing to look down at his phone, but then Hyunjin added, “I mean, he isn’t wrong… I think Y/N should have some time to process their feelings at the very least.”

“Are you Y/N?”

Both Hyunjin and Seungmin shook their heads nervously knowing they’ve upset the older boy, “Then that isn’t your decision to make. Let Y/N do what they feel is best. We all know how you guys feel about it, so please don’t make this any more difficult for them than it already is.”

The two boys muttered a quick apology to you, not wanting to add any more stress to your current situation, but you knew they only had your best interest in mind and wanted to protect you from any more hurt.

“It’s okay, thank you for caring for me, but I’d like to talk to him,” you said gently, giving the two boys a reassuring smile, “I’ll be okay, I can hold my ground.”

Seungmin sighed, “Whatever, just say the word and I’ll beat the shit out of him if it doesn’t go well.”

“I’ll verbally beat him,” Hyunjin added, causing you to giggle at the seriousness of their tones since you could never imagine them physically harming any living being.And, as if on cue, your phone vibrated, lighting up with the message:

hi, im sorry about earlier. can we talk tomorrow?

┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈

Across from you sat a nervous Jisung, who was fidgeting since the moment he entered your apartment, his fingers tapping the table anxiously as he struggled to find the words, not knowing if there was anything he could say to truly convey how sorry he was. You stared at him from his seat, arms crossed with an expectant - yet patient - look on your face. Ten minutes had gone by since he had arrived, and not a single exchange of words had been made, and you were growing tired of it.

“Jisung, please say something.”

The boy froze his seat, his body tensing, not expecting you to say anything to him, “I-...” he paused for a moment, taking a shaky breath in, “I just do not think there are enough words in the world to express to you how sorry I am and how ashamed of myself I am.”

Tears began to well up in his eyes, his legs once again bouncing as he tried to get the words out, “It’s just a lot for me, I don’t know. I know my feelings for you are like nothing I’ve ever felt before, I know that I want to be with you more than anything in my heart, but…” he sighed heavily, running a hand through his soft locks, “I’m really scared,” he whispered so softly, you barely caught it.

It was your turn for your eyes to water, your heart taking a hit as your eyebrows furrowed sympathetically at Jisung’s words. Although you can recognize his fears and could only guess where he was coming from, it didn’t take away from the pain he caused you and how much it affected your trust in him.

“Could you explain to me what you’re scared of? I want to understand.”

The concern etched on your face and the genuinity behind your eyes makes Jisung fall in love with you all over again, seemingly making him melt under your gaze as his heart swells. But just as quickly as the affection rushed into his heart, also came the insecurity and negative thoughts that endlessly reminded him how undeserving he was of someone so considerate and selfless.

Jisung shook the thought out his head, reminding himself of what Minho had told him the day before, “I’m scared that I’ll hurt you. I have… well, you know, I’ve hurt my previous partners in the past and I’m terrified I’ll do the same to you,” he murmured, guilt lacing each word, “I’d hate to do the same thing to you, I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself and even now I don’t know if I can.”

Part of you felt relieved to hear those words from Jisung, now knowing his reasonings were not due to a lack or loss of feelings, or did it have anything to do with your looks or his attraction to you, but rather he was battling his own bouts of insecurities. The other part of you felt guilty for assuming the worst in Jisung and not giving him a chance to explain himself initially, you felt terrible for thinking he was only having fun with you and leading on. The expression on his face told you everything you needed to know about him, and that was him being sincere with every word he spoke. He truly did care for you, he wanted the best for you, and was genuinely struggling with his own complex emotions.

“Jisung, it’s okay to be afraid. Trust me, I am too. I know about your past, even way before I even met Minho or you, but the person I’ve come to know is nothing like that. You’ve changed in the best way possible, I fell and still am falling in love with you everyday.”

Jisung’s eyes widened in shock when he heard your words. All his mind could focus on was how you heard about him way before you joined the team, you knew about every horrific thing said about him when you two first met, yet… You didn’t treat him any differently like others had, you gave him a chance to fully know the kind of person people thought of him as, you still… fell in love with him? Wait, did he hear that right? You love him too? Love?

How could it be possible, how could someone like you possibly love someone like him? How did you manage to see past all his ugly personality traits and still managed to fall in love with him? Oh, no. Did he trick you? Had he accidentally fooled you into thinking he was a better person than he actually was ever capable of being? Oh my, Jisung’s brain was short-circuiting as he started to panic, losing any sense of rationality he had.

Your warm hand resting on top of his caused him to break out of his stupor, his wide eyes softening around the edges at your loving expression and oh, how much he adored seeing himself in the reflection of your eyes filled with affection, a sight he swore he could die in.

“Talk to me, Jisung. Tell me what you’re thinking. I’m here for you, I won’t leave your side as long as you let me listen.”

“I… You’ve heard about me before you even met me?”

You laughed, “Yes, I did. Honestly, I thought you were a real asshole, but I’m glad I gave you a chance anyway. I don’t regret meeting you for a moment.”

His mouth fell open, still processing each word, “Even after I hurt you?”

“Well, I know now you meant no harm. This is hard for you, I can understand that. I also understand being afraid. What you did hurt me, but I love and care for you too much to let that ruin something between us so long you give us the chance too.”

Each word you spoke was as if a love spell was being casted on him, bewitching him completely as his heart began to pound faster, butterflies warming up the pit of shame he had been carrying with him this whole time. Your words enveloped him into a gentle embrace, so tactful and ginger with his soul, so perfectly chosen that it felt like you were healing cracks in his heart he didn’t even know existed. Oh, how could he have ever been so stupid to push away love so saccharine and addicting? He never knew love was truly like, but now he didn’t want to ever let it go, he wanted to relish under his warmth as long as he possibly could.

“Really? Do you really mean it?” Of course he knew the answer to that already. Just one look into your eyes, and he could see that you were offering him every part of you and a lifetime of love, and he’d be a fool to ever doubt you.

“I do. I mean it with everything in me.”

Your honey-coated words left him in a blushing mess, nervousness still present in his body, but all for a much different reason. Your sincerity excited him, yet it also filled him with anxiety, the fear of disappointing you looming over him, convinced he had tricked you into falling for a false image of him.

“But… What if I hurt you again? What if I disappoint you? What if I turn out to be as bad as everyone said? I’m not as good as you think I am, Y/N, really I-”

“Jisung.”

He stopped in his tracks, biting the inside of his cheek as he felt your hand squeeze his reassuringly.

“We are two different people, with two entirely different life experiences. Yes, eventually, you’ll hurt me, and I’ll hurt you too. In relationships, we are bound to upset one another, but what matters is how we approach those situations,” you whispered softly, scooting your chair closer to him, “I don’t care who you think you are because I love you for you, and I think you’re the most wonderful experience I’ve had. You can be afraid all you want, but I promise I’ll hold your hand through it and show you that you’re worthy of that love.”

As you scooted your chair next to Jisung’s, both your hands reached to cup his face, wiping away the tears he had shed, “I promise. As long as you let me, I’ll be here for you. Even if you don’t trust or believe in yourself, can you trust me? Will you believe me when I say you’re an amazing human being? Will you let me teach you how to love and be loved?”

All Jisung could do is marvel at the sudden closeness, his cheeks and ears flushing the instant he felt your touch. Your words only sent him further down into a frenzy, goosebumps forming at your declaration as he felt himself swoon in his seat, his head dizzying from the overwhelming sensation of both nervousness and affection. He had so much to say, yet his mouth could barely utter out a sound as he shrunk in his seat, your boldness taking him aback.

Even though he hadn’t moved from his seat once, he felt himself become breathless as he admired each of your features, he swore he heard wedding bells in the background as you spoke. Oh, c’mon, Jisung, you need to say something. He was panicking, much like he was during your first meeting, struggling to find the words as he became entranced with you, capturing every detail of your face in his mind so he’d never forget this moment.

“I love you.”

That was all he could say, all he could muster up, but that was enough. That was all you needed to hear as you let out a giggle, your eyes crinkling as you smiled, “I love you too.”

“I’m sorry for being an idiot. I want to try my best for you. I promise I will.”

“It’s okay. You don’t need to apologize, and I know you will.”

“Can… Can I kiss you?”

His question caught you by surprise, heat rushing to your cheeks while nodding, mumbling a quick ‘of course you can,’ as you pulled his face to yours, planting your lips onto his.

Maybe Han Jisung wasn’t so bad after all.

191 notes · View notes

shadesoflsk · 5 months

Text

A glimpse in Leon's life.

PAIRING: Basically just DI!Leon with few mentions of GN!Reader but nothing much.

NOTES: This is just a little drabble I had on my mind for some days. This is my first work so please forgive if this is so shitty. :P

WARNINGS: Mentions of alcohol, blood. But mostly slice of life!

Leon is a simple man, really. No matter how horrendous his missions could be, how bloody and gruesome the scenario might be — his mind and lifestyle remained the same.

Given the nature of his career he couldn't stick to a specific routine. "We need your help." That simple sentence would wake him up almost immediately (not a difficult task since poor guy is a light sleeper) and drop everything that he had planned for the day ahead — not that he minded, though. For almost twenty years of his life, he's only known that.

Yet, the comfort of coming back to his home, to his sacred place made up for every gunshot he had to fire and for every bloodshed he had to witness. Heavy footsteps echoed through the vast living room filled with cinnamon candle lights — not his but theirs. A nice reminder that he wasn’t alone. At least not anymore. Years made him a sappy man, reminiscing about his younger self. Bright eyes with a noble future. The latter has never changed no matter the situation. He loves helping people — he loves people.

That’s why he always indulges in conversation with the same old lady at the supermarket, just like he’s doing right now. “How have you been young guy?” The lady would always ask even though Leon wasn’t young in the slightest sense of the word, but hey, he gratefully takes the compliment. “Nothing much.” He lies; his back was hurting as hell. Being thrown around was bearable when he was 27. Now, he worries he might not be able to crouch and pick up his cellphone whenever he drops it (which it's a rather common occurrence for him.)

He walks through the alcohol aisle. His eyes gazed along the wide-ranged options of booze. He was proud of himself since he grew out of that deadly addiction of his. He used to drown on it whenever he could, morning, afternoon and specially on nights when his own mind would play dirty tricks on him and display the various scenarios where he would blow the brains out of a zombie. Or when he was taken away from a normal life that dreadful night of September.

Now, instead of reeking of alcohol and sweat, he much prefers to smell like home. His partner loves candles — so does he. He picked up on a habit which he would take a quick sniff from the scented candle. He is a simple man; he likes what his darling likes. Cinnamon and apple was his favorite. “Jesus… the prices these days.” He muttered under his breath as he looked at the price. Life as an agent was tough, but well rewarding. A black card was always in his wallet, yet he barely used it. He could basically buy the whole supermarket in the blink of an eye, but he decided to follow a humble life. Too humble.

Leon was a simple man, he loved cleaning things. A cleaning freak some would say but he paid no mind. He likes tidying up his house — apron and everything. “Kiss the cooker.” “Housewife.” He had many of them, too many of them. Dad’s jokes were a daily thing throughout his life. Even when he was fresh out of college, he would drop some jokes expecting everyone to laugh at them. No one did. But he never stopped, it wasn’t in his nature to give up on his personality or something so essential about himself. And maybe that’s why he's a living proof of his everlasting identity.

#leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy fluff #leon kennedy x reader #resident evil #leon kennedy drabble #resident evil drabble

159 notes · View notes

deepseaorchid · 3 months

Text

Stay With Me - Sejanus Plinth x GN!Reader

Summary: An eventless walk to your mentorship duties at the arena ends in catastrophe. When the rebel bombs in the arena severely injure you, you find your legs trapped under rubble. Fortunately, your sweet friend Sejanus Plinth arrives to help you and carry you to safety. Emotions are high between you and Sejanus, resulting in a teary-eyed confession from him that provides you with an answer to a mystery that has occupied your thoughts for months.

Pairing: Sejanus Plinth x Gender-neutral! Reader

Warnings: Romance / Comfort / Fluff / Angst / Hurt / Blood / Brief graphic violence / Canon deaths / Slight canon deviation for plot purposes / Injury / Angst with a happy ending

Word Count: 4.9k

A/N: This was a request from @flutteringphalanges

Thank you so much for requesting! I had a lot of fun with this. I really hope you like reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

The pink morning sun shone through the curtains of your bedroom window. You woke up before your alarm, not that you managed to sleep much last night anyway. The events of this week plagued your thoughts too much to sleep easy. On the day prior to the Hunger Games, the mentors were required to show their tributes around the arena, where all but one will die. A lump formed in your throat. You were mentoring the District 6 tribute, Ginnee. She wasn’t a fighter, none of them were. They were children.

Ginnee was a nice girl, and you like to think that if the circumstances were different, maybe you could have had a chance at being her friend. You had almost no hope she would survive the games, which made seeing her difficult. What do you say to someone who you know will likely not live to the end of the week?

You pull back the feathery covers of your bed and put your feet on the cold floor, stretching your back. You lean to the side, pulling open the crystal knob on the ornate bedside table. Your cold feet tap on the floor as you reach into the draw. Within the small table held a collection of love notes with smudged, blocky handwriting. You pick one up, turning it over in your hands. You’d read each letter a thousand times over now. They were sappy and saccharine sweet. They spoke of kissing cherry lips so gentle and a burning desire to hold you forever. It was silly and poetic but it kept you going on hard days like this. It showed you someone was looking after you, even though they wouldn’t say who they were. The only indication of the sender was a squiggle at the bottom of each note.

You stand up, putting all the letters away but one and moving towards the large wooden armoire. You open the door, pulling out the same scarlet uniform you wore every day. You grimace at the colour. You used to like it, but now the colour reminded you of blood. Blood you would inevitably see tomorrow. You tuck the love letter inside the breast pocket of the uniform.

The radio in the living room crackles softly, and a gentle tune begins playing, drifting down the hall. Your father was awake. You dress quickly and fix your hair, finishing getting ready for the day. Walking down the hall, you spot your father in the dimly-lit kitchen cooking breakfast. Following the war, you had to lay off your poor cook, unable to afford him anymore. Your father took up cooking and while his dishes were experimental at best, you appreciated the effort.

“Hey Bud!” Your father chirps, he looks up only momentarily from the cast iron skillet. You smiled at the nickname he had used for you since childhood. You walk up to him, glancing over his shoulder to see what he’s making. Eggs again. The yellow, runny mess dances around the pan as your father stirs lazily.

“Want some?” He asks, holding the pan up to your nose. You do your best not to grimace.

“No thanks, I’m walking to school with Sejanus,” you sigh. Your father seems displeased with that answer, his silver eyebrows furrowing slightly.

“Is that the Plinth boy upstairs?” He asks. You roll your eyes. No matter how often you brought Sejanus over to study or just to hang out, your father seemed to forget who he was. You couldn’t decide if he was messing with you, or if he simply did not care enough about Sejanus to learn his name.

You mumble an agreement. Your father shrugs his shoulders.

“Have fun, I suppose. You really should eat something. I made these with you in mind,” he says, pointing to the yellow slop in the pan.

“I can tell.” You chuckle quietly. Your father feigned a look of shock. “I am trying!” He gasps, he clearly had much more energy than you had this morning. You probably might have eaten the eggs if it were not for the knot forming in your stomach over your task as mentors today. It was a solemn event, and for some reason, it felt inappropriate to be eating breakfast when your tribute would likely have nothing today.

You glance at the grandfather clock pushed against the wall. 6:50am. It was probably time to head out soon. You quietly excuse yourself, saying goodbye to your father on your way out of the heavy black front door. You walk down the hallway of the apartment building. Once grand and elegant, the pinnacle of Capitol sophistication, the building now stood in a state of disrepair. Hallway lights flickered and blinked, and a suspicious mould had begun forming around parts of the ceiling. You push the white button for the elevator. After releasing it, the button pops off and clatters to the floor. You sigh, leaning your head against the elevator wall. You hate it here.

The rickety elevator pinged, announcing its arrival. The golden gates open with a metallic rattle.

“One of those mornings, huh?” Your friend’s voice rang out. Sejanus stands with his back to the far wall, a smirk on his face that did not reach his eyes. You step in beside him. You knew that the Hunger Games were tough on him. You had no clue how he was managing even a half-smile for you at this time.

What started as simply work partners for a project in an earlier year had evolved into a quiet friendship between yourself and the District boy. You would occasionally meet in the lobby of your apartment building to go on runs through the Capitol. You were each other’s first choice for everything. School projects, lunches, a shoulder to cry on, you both had an unspoken and quiet trust in one another. It was not a particularly showy friendship, but he was your friend nonetheless. A friend who made your heart beat just a little faster.

“You know it,” you sigh in response. You reach out and rub his arm as a comforting gesture. The elevator lurches forward as it begins its descent to the ground floor.

You study his face. Sejanus’s jaw is locked in place, eyes hard and skimming the passing floors in front of you. He was vocal about his dislike for the Hunger Games, and you understood where he was coming from. Had the hands of fate played differently, it could have been him at the reaping every year.

He swallows hard. “How’s Ginnee?” He asks, turning his head to you.

“She’s about as well as you can imagine,” you say, averting your gaze. The guilt you felt over the situation hung thick over you like a cloud.

“Figures,” Sejanus mutters before the elevator pinged again, stopping at the ground floor. You step out of the elevator first, striding across the marble floors over to the large glass doors of the apartment lobby. The bellhop hadn’t made it through the war. Sejanus took his job over for a moment, rushing ahead of you to hold the door. You muster a small smile for him in return.

The walks to the Academy were usually calm. The morning traffic would just be getting going. Shops with faded displays would open their doors to customers - not that there were many anymore, and you and Sejanus would go over the material for the day’s classes.

This was not the usual chatty, happy morning you had grown accustomed to. Both of you had no real desire to talk, opting to walk shoulder-to-shoulder instead. Your steps fall in sync and your breath hitches in your throat, terrified of what was to come with your tributes. Maybe it was just the city smog, but your breathing became shallow and you find yourself gasping against the wind.

Sejanus picks up on this and wordlessly wraps an arm around your shoulder. He pulls you into his chest, squeezing tight. You glance down at his large hand on your shoulder.

“It’ll be fine,” he mutters against your hair. His words feel forced, things wouldn’t be fine. Nothing about this was alright. But it was all he could manage at this time. You close your eyes and try to just focus on your breathing and Sejanus’s arms around your shoulders.. Things would get better one day. ‘It’s like ripping a bandage off,’ you think to yourself.

‘Once it’s done, it’s done.’

…

“Enjoy the show!” The turnstile chimes. A lump forms in your throat. Ginnee’s lip trembles, tears welling in her eyes.

“Enjoy the show!” In front of you, Sejanus turns around, meeting your gaze. He offers you a tight-lipped smile. You couldn’t bring yourself to smile back. You swallow hard.

“Enjoy the show!” You and your tribute walk through the gate. The grating voice continues to chime as you enter the arena. You look up, glancing around. The dome covering the arena hangs above you, letting in a small amount of natural light. You examine the pedestals where the tributes would stand before the games started. The walls were entirely smooth, impossible for a person to climb. You begin to sweat. Your main strategy was to tell Ginnee to hide during the initial bloodbath, and then pick off the stragglers. You hoped this would be enough to bring her to victory, but your heart sinks seeing that there isn’t even a place to hide.

You glance back over your shoulder towards Sejanus. Marcus is walking as far away from him as possible, Sejanus trailing after him, trying to get his attention. You turn back to Ginnee, who is observing the walls, craning her neck for a better angle. You call her name to get her attention.

“Ginnee, c’mere for a second,” you say, trying to formulate a new plan with her. She takes a few steps forward. Within an instant, the wall behind her explodes and a devastating BANG fills your ears. You’re knocked over from the force of the impact, flying several feet before sliding and rolling. The only thing you hear is ringing. You cover your ears, locking your arms in front of your eyes. The ringing doesn’t stop as more dirt and smoke kick up. Your head spins. Where’s Ginnee? Where’s Sejanus? You scream, hoping someone, anyone will hear you. The ringing begins to subside. You glance around. Your dull screams mix in with that of others. Someone near you is crying. Ginnee? You reach out, trying to find someone amidst the smoke. There’s blood on your hand. Who’s blood? Yours? You try pulling yourself forward on your stomach. Pain shoots through your body and you almost pass out. You cry out in agony and turn around. A huge slab of concrete from the wall had fallen on top of your legs, crushing them.

You reach down and try to get purchase of the slab with your fingertips. The mixture of sweat and blood on your hands makes it impossible to grab. Your hands kept slipping, slicing your palms and fingers deeper.

Another explosion went off at the far end of the arena. You see a figure - a boy, fly back. His body slams against a pile of debris with a sickening crunch, and he lays limp on the floor like a ragdoll.

You scream in horror, trying harder to lift the rubble off your legs. You alternate between lifting with the palms of your hands, and trying to grip with your fingers. Nothing worked. You yell in frustration, your palms sliding off the rubble and tears completely blurring your vision. You should have had your father’s disgusting, runny eggs this morning. You should have reread the love note. There was so much you should have done differently.

“Help me!” You scream as loud as your lungs will let you, the sound reverberating in your brain.

You keep pushing, changing tactics to slide out underneath it.

A rough hand wraps around yours pushing up with you. Your head snaps up. Covered in ash, dust and blood is Sejanus. He bites his lip in concentration and strain, a deep frown etched on his face as he pushes. Gradually, the concrete begins to lift.

“I need you to run,” Sejanus yells over the sound of gunfire. The Peacekeepers had entered the arena, opening fire at tributes attempting to escape.

“I can’t!” You sob, grabbing your legs and trying to move them out. Sejanus bites his lip again, drawing blood. He looks up.

“I’m going to let go on the count of three,” Sejanus gasps.

“What? No! Please don’t leave me!” You beg. Sejanus lifts higher.

“One, two,” he starts. Another explosion. You cover your ears and brace for impact.

“Three!” He yells. Before you have time to react, Sejanus shoots behind you and hooks his hands under your armpits. Your body slides back as he practically throws you out of harm’s way.

Sejanus had lifted the slab of rubble you were trapped under upright, helping you escape. It wobbles back and forth, shedding grey rocks as it tilts. Gravity quickly causes it to lean forward again, slamming back down onto where you just were. The impact kicks up a cloud of dust around you. Grit and dirt enter your eyes and you cough hard. Two large hands reach around your body. Sejanus wraps one hand around your shoulders, pulling you close to his chest, and reaches the other under your legs. You scream at his touch, white-hot pain shooting through you.

“I know, I know,” Sejanus says, voice shaking. “But we’ll get you to a hospital, alright?” He gasps. Your head lolls back, fading in and out of consciousness from the pain. Sejanus hoists you higher in his arms, tilting your head onto his shoulder.

“Hey, hey, stay with me here,” he pats your arm hard, leaning into you as he stands. He touches his cheek to your forehead.

“Please,” he chokes out. Your eyes roll around in your head trying to focus on your surroundings.

“Is it bad?” You moan against his skin, gritting your teeth. “My leg?” You cough. You feel Sejanus tilt his head to look.

“No. It’s fine, you’re fine.” He breathes. You feel yourself getting jostled. The agony that courses through you from the sudden movement is unlike anything you felt before. You can’t even scream, your vision immediately fades to black.

…

The linen surrounding you smells stale. Hushed whispers bounce around you. You crack your eyes open. You need a moment to let your eyes adjust. As shapes came into focus, you see a row of neatly-made beds to your left lined up one by one. There is an arched doorway, with people dressed in white clothes and strange hats scurrying to and fro.

To your right, a pale blue partition. A pair of boots sticks out from the side, resting on the bed. Who was that? You look down. Your feet are encased in thick white bandages. You try to wiggle your toes. Nothing. Your eyes trail up to the figure perched at the side of your bed. Sejanus held a ceramic bowl filled with clean water. In his hands, a wet rag dabbing carefully at some wounds on your fingertips.

“Hey,” you croak out. His head snaps towards you.

“Oh my god you’re awake,” He cries out. His eyes were red and puffy, like he’d been crying for hours. You try to reach up to him, but he catches your hand in his, clasping it firmly.

“How long was I out?” You ask, rubbing your eyes with your free hand. “About 12 hours,” he whispers, voice shaking. You study his face. Dirt and grime are still smeared across his face, whereas the exposed parts of your skin are clean, small bandages covering all your cuts. His injuries remain untreated. Had he been caring for you all this time?

“You’re hurt,” you say flatly.

“M’fine,” Sejanus smiles, eyes welling up. “I was looking after you,” He forces a laugh, looking away. You hold your breath. He stares fixed at the peeling wall in front of you, shoulders and head turned to you. You reach a shaky bandaged hand out and rest your fingertips atop his. His head snaps back, looking down at your hands together. A tear falls onto the back of your hand, splashing your knuckles. That’s why he turned away from you. You pull your hand out from under his and try lifting it up to wipe his tears. He catches your hand midair, gently pushing it aside.

“I should be the one comforting you,” he chokes out. Your eyebrows furrow. Classic Sejanus, always putting you before himself, even when he shouldn’t. You squeeze his hand hard. He bites his lip and looks down, inhaling sharply.

“Marcus escaped.”

“What?” You try to sit up. Sejanus places a hand on your shoulder, gently easing you back into the pillow of the hospital bed.

“He has a better chance out there in the Capitol than he does in the arena.” There is a twinge of anger behind his words.

“They’re still holding the Games?” You raise your voice, shocked. Sejanus only nods. Your stomach knots with anxiety. There was a pregnant pause.

“And Ginnee?” You ask after a moment. Sejanus hesitates.

“There was a parade,” he speaks slowly. “And they brought out the dead tributes on the backs of horses…” You gasp at the implication, covering your mouth with your hand. “What was left of them, at least,” He finishes. You feel sick. You must have looked sick too, because Sejanus calls a nurse for a bucket.

“I’m fine, I’ll be okay,” You say, holding your hand up to the nurse. She struts off out of sight again. You pull your forearm back for support as you try maneuvering yourself upright. This time, Sejanus didn’t stop you, moving his hand behind your back and holding your outstretched hand to pull you up. He doesn’t remove his hand from your back after sitting up, opting to rub gentle circles into the small of your back. You lean your head onto his shoulder, letting your eyes glaze over. All that for nothing. It was better her death was quick than drawn out in the Games. She didn’t suffer.

You point a shaky finger at your legs wrapped up in two neat white casts. Your toes poke out from underneath the bandages.

“Still got them, huh?” You exhale softly as a sort of half-laugh. Sejanus lets out a low chuckle.

“Yeah. They’re pretty broken though. You’ll be in a wheelchair for a while.” He glances down at you. You lift your head off his shoulder, gazing up at him. His eyes flick towards your legs, not meeting your gaze.

“Actually, in the arena…” he hesitates. “In the arena, you asked if your legs were alright when I got you out of the rubble.” You nod your head slowly at his words, recalling that moment before you lost consciousness.

“And I lied. They looked really bad. I didn’t want to scare you, so I lied and said you were fine. I could see the bone though,” his voice is little more than a whisper, lip quivering slightly. You grimace at the gruesome mental image. You feel Sejanus’s shoulders shake, and just like that he’s crying again. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, running your fingers through his soft brown hair. You feel his body tense up momentarily, before relaxing into your touch. You don’t know what to say, so you choose silence. He sobs quietly into your neck, tears wetting the collar of your hospital gown. You just keep ghosting your nails over his scalp to calm him.

“I thought you were dead,” he chokes out against your neck. “I thought you died in my arms.”

You squeeze him tighter at this admission.

“I’m not going anywhere,” You whisper in his ear. He squeezes you back, not as hard as you did. It was as though he was afraid of breaking you even more.

Sejanus pulls back from your embrace, wiping his tears off his cheeks with his hands. His gentle brown eyes are bloodshot.

“I’m sorry,” he sniffles. He stares down at his knee for a moment. You tilt your head, trying to get a better look at his face. You have never seen him like this before.

Before you can ask him what was on his mind, he reaches over behind you to the stand beside the hospital bed. You hear metal clinking and something shuffling, before he sits in front of you again.

“Here’s some of your stuff,” He says in a hushed voice, placing the items softly in your hand. He runs his large hand through his curls.

“I thought maybe you’d want it back. When the doctor gave back your uniform, I took the stuff out of your pockets. I didn’t mean to snoop, I’m-”

“Thank you.” You gaze into Sejanus’s eyes, interrupting him. He glances down, shying away from your words. You comb over the items in the palm of your hand. Your small gold watch’s face is cracked, but the seconds hand still ticks. You could get that fixed.

There’s the small teddy bear keychain - the one Sejanus bought for you on the way back from a study session.

“It reminds me of you,” he had smiled at you on that warm, sunny day. You kept it in your pocket ever since that day. Now, it is missing an ear, covered in dirt. Your eyes well up with tears.

You pick up another item. The matching friendship bracelet you made with Lysistrata Vickers when you were 12 years old is broken. The pink thread holding it together had snapped in two parts and some of the beads were missing. “B-st Frien—” it reads now. Had you been standing any closer to Ginnee, you would have met the same fate as her, scattered across that arena in several pieces.

You’re crying now, you wipe your cheeks frantically, trying not to show it. You catch Sejanus staring at the wall across from you, pretending not to notice your tears. You silently thank him for allowing you to have a moment to gather yourself.

The last item is a tattered piece of lined paper. You unfold it with shaking hands. It’s smeared with your blood, and is torn in different parts. Some of the words are missing, but the messy, blocky scrawl instantly brings a wave of peace over you. You read what you can, holding the paper together in some parts.

You smiled at me today,

My head spins as if I’m drunk when you look my way

Your sweet lips - the word is smudged with blood, you can’t make it out.

I dream of kissing your soft cheeks

I know you don’t think of me that way

But I can’t help but wonder what your hand feels - the paper is torn

For now, I’ll hold my own hand and pretend it's you,

And my broken heart will - the mangled paper cut off the rest of the words.

There were supposed to be an additional four lines to the note, you remember that much. The bottom of the paper is mangled and tattered, the words lost in the explosion. The contents of the love letter were terrible, truthfully. Barely even poetry. But someone loved you, someone thought about you enough to write consistently, and they tried. That was good enough for you. You close your eyes, allowing yourself to cry as you kiss the paper lightly.

“I don’t even remember what it said,” you laugh through tears. Sejanus’s head turns towards you.

“Can I see?” He asks. You hesitate for a moment. You never told him about the letters you’d been receiving. You figure it couldn’t hurt to show him. Gingerly, you hand the letter over with shaking hands. Sejanus skims the contents.

“And my broken heart will always love you. I’d follow you to the ends of the earth if you let me. We could build a house by the sea together. You have my whole heart, and I hope one day I’ll have yours.” He finishes, receiting from memory and choking slightly. The memory of the letter comes crashing over you.

“How did you-” You stop mid-sentence. Oh.

Sejanus stares wordlessly at you, lip quivering. A tear rolled down his cheek before he buries his head in his hands and sobs. You quickly lean forward and wrap your hand around his strong arm, stroking it gently.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Sejanus repeats over and over through tears. You reach up and pull his hands from his face. His tears had mixed with the dirt still caked on his cheeks.

“Why are you sorry?” You ask gently, trying to meet his eyes. He averts his gaze.

“M’sorry you found out this way,” he hiccups. “I didn’t want you to know until I was ready. It was supposed to be special. I was going to bring you flowers,” he says, wiping his red eyes.

You feel your stomach drop a little. You barely even had time to process the fact that you now knew who wrote the dozen letters stacked in your bedside table at home. And finding out it was your sweet friend? You’re torn between feeling elated and heartbroken for him.

Not wanting him to take your silence as rejection, you lift up a bandaged and bruised hand and touch his chin, gently turning his head towards you. The low light from the hospital wing casts a shadow over the right side of his face. He looks incredible. Your heart hammers in your chest. You study his face for a second, an unreadable expression across his soft features. Quickly, you lean forward on the bed and kiss his soft cheek. You press your lips against his soft skin long and hard, trying to put months-worth of unspoken feelings into one kiss.

You pull back. His mouth hangs slightly agape and his bloodshot eyes glaze over.

“I read those letters every night before bed,” you whisper. “I always carry one with me. Now you know what my lips feel like against your cheek,” you giggle softly, referencing the letter. His big dark eyes twinkle a little and he laughs.

Your eyes flick down towards his lips for a moment. Sejanus swallows hard.

“Can I kiss you properly?” Sejanus asks quietly, his voice barely audible. You hum a response in agreement. He tilts his head slightly and leans forward. The casts wrapped around your legs prevent you from moving any further, but he meets you all the way. His lips ghost yours gingerly, before meeting fully. Just like that, the pain in your legs and the hospital scene melts away entirely, and all you can focus on is Sejanus. His lips are slightly chapped, scratching yours lightly. He kisses you hungrily, wrapping an arm firmly around your waist and pulling you in closer.

Your hand trails up his chest and finds a home in the crook of his neck, stroking lightly. He tilts his head, meshing his lips with yours. His tongue swipes across your bottom lip. You gasp, your open mouth allowing him entry. He deepens the kiss, reaching a hand up to stroke your face. You squeeze the back of his neck gently, continuously running your fingers through his hair. Your lips are numb as he kisses you hungrily. He exhales, pulling back from you slowly.

You touch your nose against his, rubbing softly.

“So, does this mean you like me back?” Sejanus breathes. You giggle against his mouth, pulling him in by the shirt collar.

“Yes Sejanus, I thought it was obvious.” You smile. He pecks your lips, letting out a low hum. He presses his lips against yours harder and harder with every additional kiss.

The click of heels against marble floors interrupts you both. You hesitantly pull back from Sejanus and crane your neck. Peering over his shoulder, you watch your father stride through the tall arches of the hospital, trailing behind a nurse. He pauses upon seeing you.

“You’re awake!” He calls with outstretched arms. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” His tone is playful.

You laugh, shaking your head and embrace your father as he walks up to you. Sejanus shuffles out of the way. Your father hugs you tightly, squeezing your shoulders. He pulls back, turning to Sejanus.

“And you must be Sejanus, my future son-in-law! Thank you for helping,” your father beamed. His tone was still as teasing as ever, but laced with sincerity. Both you and Sejanus blush a deep red at his words. Sejanus looks down at his hands, wearing a grin that meets his ears.

“I just did what I could,” he says quietly.

“Nonsense, my boy! We must have you over for dinner soon. I’ll be in debt to you for as long as I live,” your father’s voice shakes slightly. Sejanus smiles softly, saying nothing, only nodding.

Sejanus and your father help you gather your belongings, easing you into a wheelchair and leading you out of the hospital to a waiting car. Sejanus helps maneuver your legs into the black vehicle safely and sits beside you on the red leather seats. Little star-like lights twinkled above on the ceiling, and your father enters the front to sit by the driver. The car slowly pulls out of the hospital parking lot, driving past high-rise buildings and sparkling city lights in the night. Sejanus’s warm hand wraps around yours. He leans his head closer to you, his dark brown curls tickling your skin.

“I’m happy you’re here with me,” he whispers.

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ghouljams · 7 days

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I simply adore your Dad!Ghost posts, like on one hand I 100% see the vision with Ceil’s absentee dad version but also I just…..I love the idea of him being so, so happy as a parent, being able to care for someone despite thinking that he won’t be able to. Not to project too much, but he kind of reminds me of my own dad - he’s there for every event that he can manage, he’s the one helping make Halloween costumes, and he’s the one who his girls come to for comfort. My dad was that way, and because of his deliberate effort in being a good parent we still have a close relationship, and I think Ghost deserves that - to grow old with his sweetheart and his kids (and grandkids, if they choose to have them. He’s more than happy with what he has, but I do think he would be an awesome grandpa)

Sorry to get all sappy, it just makes me wish my dad lived closer lol

I think Ghost has a hard wired switch for taking care of people. Maybe not in a way anyone but him can notice, but I think it's there. He dropped everything to get his family right, to kick his Dad's ass and get Tommy into rehab, he was best man at his brother's wedding, he loved his mom! He may have a little trouble adjusting to life with a family, maybe he runs back to the 141 the first time they call, but he gets there.

I love Ghost healing his own childhood wounds through his own kids, making sure they have everything he didn't have, all the love and comfort in the world. Again, I think it's a hard adjustment for him. There are times when he leaves the house and is just gone for a day or two early on, but he always comes back. You don't worry he's going to leave you, that's just the way Ghost is, he always comes back with some new parenting book or class that he's working on. He just needs time to do some recon, he'll be back.

He's a "shovel talk" kind of dad, you hurt one of his kids and you got a whole world of pain coming your way. Oh did one of his girls break some kid's nose? Was he the one snapping her bra strap? Yeah? Good he's never been more proud.

Ghost deserves a soft epilogue, and I'm going to give it to him.

#simon ghost riley

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ria-ragdoll · 6 months

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small things

small things that they do

cw: mentions of narcissism & the red flags of them

feat; bsd characters. (ada ver.)

nakajima atsushi.

dear darling over here will show his love to you through the little things, like simply asking if you're okay or if you need a hug. usually most of the time when he asks if you want any sort of affection, it's his silent way of saying that he wants your affection as he's just too shy at times to voice his love to you. but at times he will get enough courage to say that he loves you, but with him it's like sharing a secret in the dark night, where it's simply just the two of you and sappy feelings that make his heart jump in excitement. sometimes he'll even crack a joke if he feels up to it, sweet boy thrives off of seeing that people feel better because of him. he wants to see just how much he can do to help others, even in the expense of his own happiness, so as long as you're with him and happy, he wouldn't need anything else in the world. atsushi is hurt, causing him to be needy and clingy, he'll stick around you for a while but then suddenly distance himself, not wanting to be a nuisance. it's an annoying process, but it's a way that shows that he cares and loves, even if it's manipulative in a way. he'd do anything for you to the point of leaving you if it made you happier. so if you show your love to him in a faint way, a faint touch or simply just a smile, it's going to remind him that he's doing the right thing, and that he's doing good. atsushi is simple but sweet, a true romantic at heart, some flaws too, poor boy is trying his best. but, atsushi would do anything for you, you're truly the only thing that matters to him

dazai osamu.

dazai is a very narcissistic person, manipulating others for his own gain, it's in his port mafia black blood. but he's been trying to better himself, ever since he was given the chance to abandon the port mafia for a better life. the love he tries to show you is like being vulnerable with someone who won't criticize you for it, it feels good, maybe even a little forbidden at some times, but you enjoy it. dazai will whisper sweet nothings in your ear as you pass each other during work, he'll annoy you as you work, but it's his way of showing love, very tough love. there will be scarce touches throughout the day, sometimes even risque ones, another way of his love. but there will be times where in the comfort of your home will his heart be shown barren to you, blood, guts and all the other crap he has piled on him. he'll wear less layers as your relationship progresses, leaving him in his striped blouse and khakis and less bandages. it might not seem like much, but it's like walking around naked, you'd have to be comfortable to do that, it's a silent way for dazai to show that he trusts you. his way of love is truly silent, it might seem like he would scream out to the world that he loves you, but he also loves you enough to say it to the person who matters, the person who gave a faint reason to live in his dull life.

edogawa ranpo.

ranpo is obviously very clingy and high maintenance from first impressions, believing that just because he's smarter than everyone else he then deserves special treatment. he's very narcissistic in his own way as well, but it's mainly unintentional, he lacks the normal amount of care and love he should have been given. that then causes his over clinginess and over exaggerated personality, he lacks attention and he found that being like that then gave him the attention he looked for. he's not above becoming better either, it's how he's grown up and still has that child like mentality, but there are times when he's truly vulnerable and acts like his age. when he puts on his childish front, he'll cling to you as if you're the thing keeping him tethered to the world, maybe even share a snack if he deems that you're deserving of it. he'll drag you away from your work, so days like these are never productive, even when you whine and beg for him to let you go he won't listen at all, throw some praise in the mix and he might think about it, only if you promise to praise him more. but then during the times of solitude when it's just the two of you alone, no longer in the agency for the day, he becomes silent, quietly doing things and staring blankly at walls or even his snacks. the atmosphere of being around others fuels him, causing his loud and childish nature, but the moment he's alone he then acts his age. he'll actually be more bold as well, telling you softly to not go when you're about to go grab something from the kitchen. it's almost like he's in a state of depression, but it's just how he truly is, silent and soft. it's like watching the sunset with the person you love most, it's a soft moment, sometimes even useless to some, but in the end it's a sense of vulnerability where you share secrets without any words. his true love is like that, quietly looking out for you, using his insight to subtly help you. love is a very foreign topic for him, he used to view it as useless and unnecessary, but with you he's slowly warming up to the idea of loving someone.

i was gonna add fukuzawa but i gave up .⁠·⁠´⁠¯⁠`⁠(>⁠▂⁠<⁠,)⁠´⁠¯⁠`⁠·⁠.

— r

#bsd #x reader #open requests #— ria talks!#ranpo edogawa #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs x reader #dazai osamu #atsushi nakajima #atsushi x reader #dazai x reader #ranpo x reader #ughh its basically just a char analysis but the fandom has got to accept the characters actual personalities:(((

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lauraneedstochill · 1 year

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The Greens headcanons (modern!au)

I was inspired by @phiasaban post. the second I saw these photos I had an idea for the modern au and just wrote it all down in 10 minutes (this has nothing to do with the show! it’s just me looking at the photos, mind you):

Alicent is a single mom. loves to cook (def cooks when she’s nervous or upset), has a record collection, loves to dance when she’s tipsy. can be a strict parent when she’s pissed (or really tired) but overall is a mama bear (to the point of getting into arguments with teachers — "yeah I think I know what's best for my kids"). she's an angry driver, keeps her car super clean. dresses casually (plaid shirts and jeans), but whenever she puts on a dress she looks so smoking hot it makes every man turn around after her. tons of them flirt with her but she mostly looks uninterested. deep inside is afraid to get her heart broken again. makes friends with her neighbor Cole (he let her borrow flour a few times). he is totally in love with Alicent and everyone sees it but her. he's okay with her taking all the time she needs.

Aegon is a fuckboy but a very apologetic one. has no cruel intentions, he just “loves women so much, he can’t help himself”. either writes songs or poetry. has the weirdest captions on instagram. drinks wine 24/7 but manages to look sober when needed. ends up falling in love with one of his closest friends who’s been tolerating him for years, helping him sober up, making him breakfasts, giving cruel reviews of his sappy poems. one day she just casually picks him up in her car, they’re driving in comfortable silence, she asks him how his day went — and it suddenly strikes him that she’s the one. he’ll probably tell her right away ("I think I'm in love with you" — and she sharply presses the brakes). but it will take a couple of weeks for him to fully sober up, convince her to go on a date with him and then to give him a chance. will plant kisses all over her face whenever she’s upset. he loves movie dates, but his sense of humor is questionable.

Aemond is into sports (pick whatever you like, but he doesn’t look like a team player to me lol). very competitive, self-disciplined, doesn’t talk much. girls swoon over him and he ignores them completely. secretly is a nerd, reads a lot (and pretty much anything). falls in love with a girl who challenges him but will also stand by his side in every situation imaginable even if he’s wrong (she won’t shy away from telling him the truth when it’s just the two of them, though). he’s incredibly protective yet very gentle. it's all about forehead kisses, leaving sweet notes for her, buying flowers for no reason. not a fan of PDA's but will hold her hand every chance he gets. remembers every single anniversary. they’ll probably adopt a dog. he gives the best hugs and loves when she plays with his hair. they can talk about their favorite books for hours and she loves being the only one who gets to see that side of him.

Helaena is into astrology and tarot cards. has a cat (or three) and probably a little pet snake. talks to animals (I also think she’ll be vegan but don’t quote me on that). buys a lot of plants (and gives them names), maybe in attempt to compensate for her smoking. some may say she has a resting bitch face, but those ppl clearly never saw her smile, 'cause it lights up her face and she looks absolutely adorable. she’s the first one to steal their mother’s car (Alicent is not surprised and just texts her "no smoking in the car!"). annoyed with her brothers most of the time but god forbid someone dares to hurt them. carries a pocketknife (it looks very pretty, decorated with crystals and stuff), wears long t-shirts. adventurous but it takes time for her to trust people. will fall in love with someone who’s kind (and maybe introverted?). they’ll get matching tattoos (smth very small and simple), go on road trips and music festivals. yes, I can totally imagine her being queer.

➡ next: modern!Aemond Targaryen, college au part 1 — “All yours” part 2 — First time for everything 💌 my masterlist you can also check out the playlists I made for Aemond and Aegon 🎵

#house of the dragon #my stuff #house of the dragon modern au #modern hotd au #hotd modern au #hotd #hotd fics #hotd imagine #aemond targaryen #aegon targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #helaena targaryen #alicent hightower #house of the dragon fanfiction #alicent hightower imagine #helaena targaryen imagine #aegon targaryen imagine #aemond targaryen imagine

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anyasathenaeum · 11 months

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*KICKS DOWN DOOR* YOU ASK FOR ERIKS AND I SHALL INDULGE ok so what im gonna need is some where the reader thinks Vash (they were dating before everything went to shit) is dead until they blow into town with Woofboy and they do the whole Recognition thing yknow. Ok and so after all the Bad Shit gets dealt with and they have a moment alone to talk, he thinks that they're not gonna be in love with him anymore after all this time and might even be pissed at him for sort of "abandoning" them but they just express nothing but joy at having him back in their arms again and how they're soulmates and sappy stuff like that and its very sweet and emotional and raw because they missed each other so so much. And if you sprinkled just a little spice at the end I wouldn't mind cuz the long hair and stubble is so sexy on that man. Maybe it would be great part 2 bait idk I don't wanna put too much on you. Might be best to play that by ear.

Sorry this is so long I got excited when I saw ur post ily bye.

Across Time and Space (Part 1)

A/N: HECK YEAH ANON I AM SO HERE FOR THIS. ERIKS!VASH HURT COMFORT LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I'm mostly going off of 98!Eriks with some Stampede!Eriks mixed in hehe and this is gonna have to be split into 2 parts because I'm INSPIRED. This part is mostly set up and some hurt in the hurt/comfort part of things. :P Read the continuation in part 2 here!

Pairing: Eriks!Vash x reader

Warnings: Some slight violence, mention of nudity, literally just going off episode 18 of Trigun so potential spoilers, potential spoilers for episode 12 of Trigun Stampede, the "hurt" part of "hurt/comfort"

You brought your hand up to shield your eyes from the glaring sunlight as the tiny town came into view, the bus you were on finally arriving after what felt like an eternity and a half.

"Remind me again why we chose to come to this tiny town, Wolfwood," You grumbled under your breath, grabbing your backpack and strapping it to your back as you started to get ready to disembark from the bus.

"Cause we gotta see if we can find the Humanoid Typhoon here," The priest replied, shooting you a smile that you couldn't bring yourself to return.

"Vash is dead, Wolfwood," You snapped back, your heart tightening in your chest as you said his name for what felt like the first time in forever, "He's dead, and we're not finding him."

Wolfwood just stayed silent, watching you carefully as you let out a deep sigh, rubbing your face with your hands, trying desperately to brush off the pain that the mere thought of Vash had brought you.

Wolfwood wasn't a fool - he knew you and Vash had been in love with each other. He knew that you and Vash were more than friends, that Vash was everything to you. Wolfwood remembered how you seemed to stop living after the disaster in the city of July, when the city was turned into a crater and Vash was nowhere to be found. You had watched the man you loved fall from the sky and the city cave in on itself in a massive explosion of energy - there was no way Vash could've survived that.

When Vash died, so did you. You existed, sure - you walked and talked and drank and ate, but you had stopped living. It was heartbreaking to watch - both Wolfwood and Meryl couldn't stand to see you so broken, but nothing they did could bring Vash back. And so, you became silent, closed-off, and you never smiled anymore.

"I'm sorry, Wolfwood. I just... don't see the point in hoping for what can't be," You apologized, your voice quiet as you stared down at the floor, your heart aching in your chest as Vash's smiling face appeared in your mind.

Wolfwood sighed a bit and just stepped forward, throwing his arm around your shoulder casually. However, when he spoke, his tone was surprisingly gentle.

"It's okay. You're still hurting, (Y/N). Let's just get off this bus and settle in, yeah?"

You nodded, pulling up your hood to cover your head as you followed Wolfwood off the bus, shoving through all the people who were fighting to get on the bus you had just arrived on.

"What the hell is all that about?" You muttered, glancing at Wolfwood in confusion as you both watched the crowd of people swarming the bus, many of them shouting at the driver to let them on.

"No clue, but I have a feeling we'll find out real soon," Wolfwood replied, his shades glistening in the sunlight as he turned his head, gesturing towards a building not too far away, "Let's start at the saloon. If anybody's got information, they'll likely be there."

You just nodded and followed Wolfwood, keeping your head down and your face hidden - you didn't feel like starting a conversation with anybody who recognized you as new to the town.

However, that plan immediately went out the window the moment you and Wolfwood stepped foot into the saloon, as you suddenly found every person in the saloon pointing their guns at the two of you. You let out a stifled yelp and threw your hands up, your heart beating fast in your chest. You heard Wolfwood let out a small sound just like you had, his hands up in the air, too, sweating slightly as he glanced around.

Thankfully, after a few seconds, the townsfolk decided you weren't a threat and lowered their weapons. With that, you and Wolfwood slowly approached the bar, and you could hear Wolfwood chatting with the bartender. As he did, you walked over to the window of the saloon, gazing at the people walking by and watching the mob chasing after the bus you had arrived on.

'Man, what a weird place,' You thought to yourself, 'Feels so tense here.'

Suddenly, you watched the ground near the bus explode, sending people flying through the air and causing Wolfwood to exclaim, "What happened over there?"

The bartender explained that the town was overrun with bandits, and then you heard the name "Vash the Stampede" escape his lips and your heart just about stopped in your chest. However, you immediately recognized that the kind of violence being orchestrated by this gang being run by "Vash the Stampede" was everything Vash opposed. There was no way this was Vash's doing.

'Like it matters, he's been dead for almost two years anyway,' You thought to yourself bitterly, your mouth pressing into a thin line. You weren't listening to whatever the bartender was telling Wolfwood, but you found yourself glancing over at the entrance as you heard the door swing open.

All the patrons immediately had their guns pointing at the intruders, which in this case, happened to be a tall man with long, blonde hair wearing glasses, holding a young girl with short, brown hair in what almost looked like a chokehold. You found yourself reaching for your own weapon, readying to fight the man until you heard the girl speak.

"Uh oh. Hey, what's the big idea you guys?!"

You jumped a little at how loud she was, and you heard the patrons mumbling to themselves, "Oh, it's only Lina."

"What do you mean "only Lina"?! Let go of me, Eriks!" The young girl, Lina, shouted, freeing herself from the grasp of the tall, blonde man who simply let her go and watched her walk towards the bar, his expression surprised.

"Lina, what's the big hurry?" The bartender asked as the girl walked over, standing right next to you and Wolfwood. You studied the girl carefully, deciding that she couldn't be older than 12 at the most.

'She's very brave, I gotta give her that,' You thought to yourself, your lip twitching upwards a bit.

"I was wondering if you could hide me somewhere," Lina asked, a sheepish smile on her face as she asked.

The bartender looked a bit concerned as he inquired, "What did you do this time?"

"She doesn't know when to quit."

You jumped out of your skin at the sudden, new voice - the tall, blonde man, Eriks, had walked up to the bar without you noticing. You physically jumped, your hood falling from your head and revealing your face, not that it mattered - you weren't trying to hide anymore.

"Oh, sorry! Did I scare yo-?" Eriks began to apologize, turning to look at you as he did so, but his sentence died in his mouth as he looked at your face, his eyes widening behind his glasses.

"It's okay," You let out a jittery half-chuckle, just trying to recollect yourself, "I just didn't hear you walk up to the bar, just startled me a bit."

Eriks didn't say a word - he just continued to look at you, his eyes almost owlishly wide. You couldn't decode the expression on the man's face, and you began to feel uncomfortable at the level of intensity in his gaze.

"Um... is something wrong?" You asked, your voice making it clear that you were becoming uncomfortable.

That was enough to snap Eriks out of whatever stupour he was in, with him shaking his head a bit as though trying to clear it, his tone a bit embarrassed, "S-Sorry! No, nothing's wrong, you just... you look like somebody I knew once."

You found yourself wanting to smile a bit, but the words struck pain into your heart again and you just nodded, your lips pressing into a thin line once again.

"I see."

The man, Eriks, let out a nervous laugh before extending his hand to you for you to shake, "I'm Eriks. Sorry about startling you...?"

It was clear he was asking for your name. You just extended your hand and took his, shaking it firmly, "(Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N)."

You thought you felt Eriks' grip on your hand falter for half a moment, but you brushed it off - probably nothing of note.

"N-Nice to meet you, (Y/N)," Eriks replied, his voice breaking slightly. He was evidently very, very nervous.

"Are you okay?" You asked bluntly, "You look ready to pass out."

Eriks just nodded before letting your hand go, "Y-Yeah! I'm good, I'm fine. Just, um... Lina's in trouble."

You didn't entirely buy that sudden excuse, but you decided to go with it, "Uh oh, what did she do?"

That's when you heard Lina explaining that she thumped a bandit across the face and that the bandit was coming after her.

"What are you telling me?" The bartender asked, his voice full of worry and his expression becoming one of horror, "Oh, my dear..."

"Yeah... I'm afraid so," Lina confirmed, leaning on the bar with a sad expression on her face, "And they weren't real happy about it. But, at least I don't think they saw me come in here."

The bartender immediately began to yell, and before you had a second to process what was happening, the wall next to you exploded, causing you to cry out as you got thrown across the room.

"Hey... I wasn't done eating yet," You heard Wolfwood complain, and you groaned as you sat up from the floor where you'd landed. You could've laughed at the image of Wolfwood holding his knife and fork over his plate, which was now crushed by a piece of broken wall.

"(Y/N)! You okay?"

You looked up to see Eriks standing above you, offering you his hand to help you up, which you took gladly.

"Yeah, I'm okay," You replied, brushing yourself off as you got to your feet, wincing slightly as your back ached from the impact, "I'm probably badly bruised, but I don't think anything's broken."

The look of relief on Eriks' face didn't feel like it matched what it should've been for a stranger he had just met - he looked relieved as he would look if you had been one of his closest friends. It was weird.

However, before you had a moment longer to think about it all, you heard yelling coming from outside the bar - the bandit who Lina had hit, yelling to give her up or that he'd shoot again if they didn't.

You grit your teeth, anger surging through your body - how dare this bandit threaten a child? She may be feisty and fiery, but she was still just a child. You grabbed your weapon and began to walk towards the hole in the wall, but somebody stopped you in your tracks, putting their arm out in front of you - Eriks.

"No, wait. Let me handle this," He spoke, his voice quiet but very sure. A surge of familiarity coursed through you - where had you heard this before? That tone... that calmness... it unsettled you as you knew you'd heard it before, but where? You couldn't pin it.

That split second of you being thrown off by the sudden feeling of déjà-vu was all Eriks needed before he walked out of the bar, his hands in the air, trying to appease the bandit and stop him from doing further damage to anybody or anything.

"Wolfwood," You mumbled, coming up to the priest, "Is it just me, or does Eriks feel... familiar to you?"

The priest just looked at you carefully, "Familiar? Familiar how?"

"I don't know," You confessed, "Just... the way he spoke to me just now reminded me of-"

Your eyes widened and your words died on your lips as you realized exactly who Eriks had reminded you of.

Vash.

You didn't need to say anything - Wolfwood could see the immediate look of shock on your face, the realization dawning on you. You could feel your breathing picking up and your heart rate was starting to go through the roof - why did Eriks sound so much like Vash? Hadn't you suffered enough? To lose Vash once was agony. But to be reminded of him now? It was unbearable.

"Woah, (Y/N), woah, calm down, breathe. You need to breath."

You could hear Wolfwood's words, but you couldn't understand them, couldn't process them. You were bordering on a full-blown panic attack. The world suddenly became quieter, all sounds muted, as though you were underwater. You couldn't process anything else going on around you right now. All you could do was stumble to your feet and run to the hole in the wall of the saloon, your eyes landing on the blonde man who reminded you so much of the love of your life.

You didn't really understand what was happening - you could vaguely hear the tones and timbre of Eriks' voice and the voice of the bandit, but you couldn't make out the words. You watched as Eriks bowed to the bandit all the way to the ground, trying to apologize on Lina's behalf and diffuse the situation, but it apparently hadn't been enough.

The bandit yelled something at Eriks, to which he apparently agreed. To your surprise, you watched as Eriks suddenly... began to take off his clothes?

"W-What?" You mumbled, not understanding what was happening. All you could make out was the sound of Lina crying next to you, and Wolfwood comforting her as Eriks defended her, even at the cost of his pride.

When you looked back at Eriks, you suddenly felt as though you had been hit by a truck.

Those scars... that body... the missing arm replaced with a prosthetic...

All you heard before the ground came up to meet you and the world went black around you was the sound of Wolfwood exclaiming your name - "(Y/N)!".

You don't know how long you'd been unconscious for, but when you found yourself waking up, you didn't recognize your surroundings. You were in a rather large room, laying on what could've only been a hospital bed, right next to a large window. There were no other beds or patients in the room with you - it was just you. And-

"Morning, sweetheart."

You jumped, turning to see Wolfwood sitting at your bedside, a smirk on his face as his cigarette dangled between his lips crookedly.

"W-Wolfwood," You spoke, your voice strained, "W-What-?"

"You dropped like a stone," Wolfwood explained, standing from his chair and walking over to sit right next to you on your bed, "You saw Eriks' scars and I guess the realization of who he was was just too much for you to handle. Can't say I'm surprised, it's not every day you learn that supposedly dead love of your life isn't actually dead."

Wolfwood just grinned at you, but you just sat there, unmoving, eyes staring forward like you were a statue, not really seeing whatever you were looking at. The memories of what had preceded your passing out came back to you in flashes, and before Wolfwood could continue speaking, you were suddenly sobbing as you had never sobbed before.

All the pain, the sadness, the grief, the loneliness, the feeling of having part of you missing for so long overwhelmed you, making you feel every bit of emotion you had been repressing over the past two years. You sobbed and sobbed and sobbed, crying your eyes out as you buried your face into your knees, unable to comprehend what was happening. Surely you were dead, or dreaming, because there was no way that Vash was really alive.

Unless...

"I'll leave you be," You heard Wolfwood say gruffly, before he stood up, patting your back and leaving you alone to confront your emotions.

After that, Wolfwood walked over to another patient's room - that of Eriks, or rather, Vash the Stampede. He had already spoken to Vash earlier, telling him about the fact that Millions Knives was still at large, but now... this was going to be a very different conversation.

Wolfwood didn't even bother knocking, just letting himself right into Vash's room, walking over to where the blonde young man sat in his bed.

"You know, I'm surprised you didn't straight up kill (Y/N)," Wolfwood started, a small smirk on his face as he sat next to Vash, who was just watching him carefully. He watched Vash's expression become one of concern the moment your name left Wolfwood's lips.

"What do you mean?" Vash asked, eyebrows furrowing at Wolfwood's statement - the last Vash saw of you was when he stopped you from taking on the bandit yourself, and you were fine, then.

Wolfwood sighed, "(Y/N) saw your scars, Stampede. It was too much for them to handle and they passed out cold. Smacked their head pretty bad on the way down, but that was my bad, I didn't expect them to go down."

"What?!" Vash exclaimed, his blue eyes widening in worry. He immediately began to try to get out of his bed, but Wolfwood stopped him.

"(Y/N)'s spent the last two years grieving you, Vash. They believed you were dead. This is a bigger shock than you know. They heard nothing from you and the last thing they saw of you was when July city imploded on itself."

Vash's eyes somehow managed to widen even more, and tears were beginning to well in them as Wolfwood explained the situation to him. Wolfwood told him everything he knew - about how you'd essentially become a living statue, not truly living beyond basic existence, about how broken you'd become, how closed-off and sad you were now. You'd been changed so badly that neither Vash nor Wolfwood were really sure if you'd ever rebound from this.

By the time Wolfwood was done explaining, Vash found himself crying silently, his heart torn to pieces at the thought of what this had done to you.

"They loved you more than anything, Vash," Wolfwood stated quietly, standing up as he went to take his leave for the second time that day, "I think you owe them an explanation and a very big apology."

With that, Wolfwood left Vash to his own thoughts, just as he had done to you earlier.

Vash sat there, just replaying everything Wolfwood had told him in his mind. He was telling the truth, Vash knew - he had seen the look on your face when he initially saw you as Eriks. Vash had been so taken aback by you when he took a good look at your face - you looked so much like yourself, but simultaneously so different.

Your face had new scars, and lines engraved in your skin from frowning and worrying rather than from smiling, as you used to in the past. Your expression was tired and somewhat empty, even as you greeted him, and your tone was dull and serious. And your eyes...

Tears began to course down Vash's cheeks freely, soft sobs escaping from his throat as pain jolted through him as he recalled your eyes.

Your eyes were utterly lifeless. Like you had died in every way except physically.

Vash had had to restrain himself from gasping loudly, sobbing his heart out and begging you for forgiveness when he'd looked at you for the first time in two years. He had wanted nothing more than to pull you into his embrace as he used to do before July then and there, but when you failed to recognize him, Vash knew that he couldn't do that to you.

'There's no way they still love me now,' Vash thought to himself, his pain intensifying and his cries becoming louder as he sobbed into his hands, 'I've destroyed them, too.'

You were the love of Vash's life. Nobody ever meant more to him than you did, and after the destruction of July city... Vash couldn't face you. He was a murderer, while you were innocent, pure, and good. He couldn't bring himself to look for you, or try to reach out to you, because he had wanted to keep you safe. Especially now that his bounty was 60 billion double dollars and everybody was hunting for him.

But when he saw you in that saloon... and he saw how damaged you'd become... he realized that he'd done had been wrong. So, so wrong. You'd loved him all that time, to the point where his supposed death broke you beyond repair, and it was all Vash's fault. In trying to protect you, he'd been the one to hurt you worse than anybody ever had before.

And now, he had to find the strength to face you. But how could he?

"Your gun! Give me your gun, hurry!"

Vash suddenly heard the frantic, panicked voice of Lina's grandmother, Grandma Sheryl, coming from downstairs. He focused in, wiping the tears off his face as he listened.

"It's Lina, they got her!"

The arguing continued, and Vash knew what he had to do then. Once he'd rescued Lina, he'd talk to you. He'd face you, and finally pay for his mistake.

As Vash dressed and exited his room, he found Wolfwood standing there, leaning against the wall, a cigarette between his lips once more.

"They got (Y/N), too, it seems like," Wolfwood stated, looking surprisingly calm despite having to deliver terrible news, "Guess they thought (Y/N) was a worthy hostage."

Vash's eyes widened, and his gaze hardened slightly, his heart twisting hard in his chest at the thought of you in danger - despite the two years that had passed, Vash still loved you more than anything in his life, and he still sought to protect you. He had thought of you every day, wondering where you were, what you were up to, if you'd missed him...

He had to rescue you and Lina as soon as possible.

With his teeth gritted and his gun holstered, Vash headed out with Wolfwood trailing in his wake.

"Then, let's go get them."

Wolfwood just smirked.

"There's the Stampede I used to know."

#anya's athenaeum #trigun #trigun stampede #trigun stampede x reader #trigun x reader #vash the stampede #vash the stampede x reader #vash x reader #eriks!vash #trigun eriks #eriks x reader

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