Tumgik
#maybe ill do other drawings of her who knows
mmollymercury · 1 year
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Encantober, day 30 ~ Milk🍼🍼🤱🤱
Of course milk is a prompt😭😭 I mean, it was bound to happen. To all the new/unaware encanto fans, I'm seriously sorry, this must be so confusing😭
A continuation of yesterday's drawing! Dolores has given birth to her first baby👶👶 Breastfeeding is natural and beautiful so don't say anything otherwise or I'll scream😤😤
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+ I've been brainstorming on what the baby could grow up to be,, at first, I was just gonna draw a generic baby and not really think abt the character, but I had fun thinking abt all the different powers the baby could have, since I wanna make them autistic coded lol. Eventually, I decided on a girl, who like me, thinks visually and imagines up elaborate scenarios, but unlike me, has the ability to project those detailed, visual thoughts into reality💞 her name is: ✨Vera✨ Idk it just spoke to me lol. Yes she inherited the gap in Pepa’s teeth😭
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After the family started to work through their issues, I think they decided to be more,, laid back with the whole 'colour coordination' thing. Free expression and all that. Vera has some rainbow earrings from her grandmother and her first cousin once removed: Mirabel(who she just calls tia Mirabel), embroiders all her clothes, they brainstorm designs together😇😇 she loves colourful things!
Tomorrow is the final day. I'm so happy I've been able to draw EVERYDAY so far for this challenge, seriously, it blows my mind, I never thought I'd be able to complete one of these 'daily challenge' things. HOWEVER if you haven't done everyday, that doesn't invalidate the work you did or the time you put into that work, whatever people felt comfortable with doing is amazing and still a massive achievement! Same goes for if you didn't participate. All of you should be proud! Do something sweet for yourselves💖💖💖💞💞
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autisticaradiamegido · 7 months
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day 243
WE DID IT LADS
look at all these aradias that didnt exist last month!! u love to see it
thank u everyone who participated!! even if you just did one day i had a fun time checking the tags and seeing all the excellent aradia arts
i tried my best to put all the posts i found in my Aradia August Tag on my homestuck blog so if you would like to browse the other fine artists from this month i recommend checking there B)
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puppyeared · 2 months
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i wanna post my skip to loafer art but i cant do it knowing ppl are gonna put it on tiktok and pinterest bc itd be like. bringing an invasive species ykwim
#my meds just kicked in so im feeling talkative but truly idk how to explain it#its like. with anything else id be more than happy to introduce it to ppl like monkie kid and mp100. witch hat maybe but its personal to me#but skip to loafer is special to me. and i feel bad for saying this bc other ppl do deserve to watch smth they will enjoy#hell the reason i got into it was bc my friend was kind enough to lend me her copy and i got hooked#its so ironic im saying this esp given how insecure i am abt depicting characters wrong. but i really dont want to look thru the tags#and see them on a 'can i copy your homework' tier list. or ppl getting mad abt why egashira mitsumi and shima cant just be a throuple#its just!! i wont stop you if thats how you like to engage with the show or how you interpret it bc ill just ignore it and leave u alone!!#and theres no objective wrong way of doing it!! and i know that interacting with the work is what forms a community after all!!#but keeping it tight knit is just easier for me bc nobody has to worry abt making each other laugh and we can enjoy it for what it is#fully aware im saying this as someone whos drawn monkie kid art with text post memes and owl house draw the squad templates#but at the same time i just. dont want to explain myself or give ppl reasons why shima and mitsumi are ace coded just bc it 'feels right'#fandom is a communal thing and it feels so hypocritical thinking this. too many conflictng thoughts that idk what to act on#yapping
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ddejavvu · 6 months
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remus x animagus!reader where he doesn’t know it’s her yet, and there’s just always this random cat (or other animal) following him around the castle, and cuddling up to him in the hospital wing after full moons
<333
"You shouldn't be in here."
Remus's stern words hardly deter you, especially because by now he's got the strength to push you off of the bed, but he doesn't. Instead he watches warily, neck craned and rolled into miniscule lines of chub that you'd kiss if you were in your human form, as your paws trace a path up towards his head.
"You're some sort of creature," Remus decides, speaking aloud in the deserted hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey only has one other patient now, but they've been quarantined in a separate room due to the infectious nature of their illness. It means that Remus can speak at will, and you're happy to plant yourself over his chest to feel it vibrate at the sound. You're more accustomed to doing so with your human ears, but it's nicer to hear your boyfriend's voice with cat senses.
"You're too smart to be a regular cat," He lifts a shaky hand up to your head, offering you a chance to inspect him as though you haven't already splayed yourself over his chest, "But the castle doesn't allow many magical pets. Which means you're not supposed to be in here at all. Definitely not in the Hospital Wing."
You offer him a soft, plaintive meow, purring when he strokes his knuckles over the space between your ears.
"Maybe you're an omen," He muses suddenly, eyes narrowing, "No one else ever sees you. Are you warning me of some cruel fate?"
You blink at him, slowly, and he decides, "You're not very threatening for an omen."
Remus has professed the exact same observation about your attempts to be threatening in human form as well. Somehow, the tightening of your brows and the downturn of your lips aren't enough to petrify Remus, though it works rather nicely on errant second-years who find themselves confident enough in the castle to misbehave, but too terrified to face the consequences.
You draw back your shoulders and let your fangs glint in the low lights of the hospital wing, mouth open to hiss warningly at Remus.
Your cruel fate is a good night's sleep, you grouse at him, lamenting the fact that he'll never hear the words, you'd rest more if you weren't always dishing out inexhaustible wit.
"Oh, very scary," He chuckles, poking teasingly at your left pointed fang, "I'm not afraid of you, cat, you couldn't hurt me more than I've already hurt myself."
And it's true.
His limbs, long and lanky, bear the scratch marks of his own claws, gnarled nails that lie in wait under the surface to be beckoned by the moon's silvery siren song. There's a tear on his cheek, skin split and blood carefully wiped clean, where he'd fought with himself, with the will of the universe, and tried clinging to his human skin. He's nursing a rolled ankle from thrashing about during his transformation, and a patch of his hair is still reddened with copper no matter how many times Madame Pomfrey had washed it with a wet washcloth. He's barely a boy anymore, more like a string of injuries hanging together with sutures and dittany.
In hopes that companionship works just as well as Pomfrey's healing remedies, you wriggle closer still to his face, draping yourself over his neck and laying your face against his own. It's an awkward position for him, probably more pressure than he's used to on his windpipe, but you keep your weight off of him as much as possible, and purr like the motor of Sirius's bike against his ear.
He's hesitant to accept it at first, which you knew he would be. He needs to be sought out, he needs someone to hold out their hand for five seconds before he decides to take it or not. You wait, one, two, three, four, five, and he exhales, the air hitting your fur.
"Don't be here when they check on me," He murmurs, hand back at his side as your tail curls around his opposite ear, "Thanks, cat."
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rogueddie · 1 year
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"Something is really wrong with Steve," Robin says.
The party look up, startled. They wait for her to continue, but she starts pacing nervously. It immediately sets the kids on edge, glancing at each other uneasy.
"What do you mean?" Dustin eventually speaks up. "Is he... ill?"
"No, no, it's... his parents came home, right?"
"Yeah, we know," Max snorts. "Dustins mom had to ban him from the house because he wouldn't leave."
"He can't avoid them forever," Dustin points out. "I get that it's hard to talk to them when you have to lie all the time but they're, like, paying for all his shit."
"No they aren't!" Robins voice cracks. "They cut him off years ago! Dude, he hates them and now he's writing up a resignation letter so he can go work for his dad."
"Why is that a bad thing?" El asks, eyes a little wide.
"He'd have to train for a few months in New York for one."
"New York?!" All of them burst out. They all try to speak at once, loud and panicked. They're so loud that Hopper bursts out, confused and tired and panicked.
"What the hell is going on?" He snaps.
The kids all look a little guilty. El stands up so he looks at her. "We are worried about Steve."
"What? Jeez, that's what you're yelling about?"
"He's moving away!" Mike snaps. "To New York! For months!"
Hopper frowns at him like he's not making sense. "New York?"
"To work with his dad," Robin adds. "I didn't know if I should talk him out-"
"They're back?" Hopper asks. He's gone still, voice devoid of emotion and dangerously calm. "How long?"
"A month? Maybe more, it-"
"And they're home now? Do you know if Steve is there with them? It's not one of his shifts, is it? That'd make it easier."
"What? No, he's home. Make what easier?"
Hopper ignores the question, grabbing his coat and shoes. "Stay here, I won't be long."
He ignores the questions that grow frantic and panicked when he picks up his gun, stomping out the door at a fast pace. Robin is yelling from the door as he climbs into his car. She's too taken aback to even begin to think of how to answer to avalanche of questions the kids throw at her.
Hopper gets to the Harrington house in record time, having sped just a little to get there. Mrs Harrington is the one who opens the door and looks a little guilty when she sees him.
"Where is he?" Hopper asks.
She steps back, letting him in. "In his room."
Hopper pushes past her, taking the stairs two at a time. Steve is sat at his desk when he enters the room without knocking, head snapping up and looking startled. He looks a little ashamed when he realizes that it's Hopper.
"Hop," Steves voice is strained. He frowns when Hopper ignores him, pulling his closet open. "Uh, Hopper? What are you doing?"
"Taking you home," Hopper mutters. He pulls out the three bags he knows Steve has been keeping hidden, just in case. "Come on, pack up."
"I can't just-"
"Yes you can. Pack. Up."
Steve only hesitates for a moment. He slowly fills up one with his few sentimental things and some things he considers important (his scoops uniform, the drawings from Will). Hopper stuffs the other two with clothes. It doesn't take them long.
"I'll come back for the rest, if you want any of it," Hopper hands Steve his car keys, waving him toward the stairs. "Wait in the car. I'll be a minute."
Steve hesitates at the door, glancing between Hopper and his mom. He leaves though, doesn't say goodbye.
"Right, here's what's going to happen; I'm going to come back for the rest of his things. I've seen that room, I'll know if somethings missing. And that shit is his, don't try to bullshit me." Hopper eyes her with visible distaste. "He's an adult now. You can't take him back and if I hear that either of you've been trying to harass him again, I'll press charges."
She nods, which is enough of an answer for him. He throws the two bags in the back with the third before climbing in the drivers seat. The air is thick with tension as he pulls out the drive, starting the drive back to the cabin.
"Um... could you, uh, drop me off at the trailer park?" Steve asks, quiet and timid in a way that is horribly familiar to Hopper. "I, uh... I need to see Eddie."
Hopper grunts. He grits his teeth to stop himself snapping. It wouldn't be fair on Steve. So he drives him there, quiet and tense.
"Thanks," Steve mumbles.
But Hopper climbs out too, gently grabbing Steves jacket lapels to drag him over to the Munsons trailer. Hopper knocks.
"Oh," Waynes eyebrows raise. He looks Hopper up and down before turning his eyes on Steve, who he gives a soft smile. "Harrington, you doing alright?"
"No," Hopper answers for him. "Could we come in for a moment?"
"Sure?" Wayne shuffles out the way, shutting the door behind them. "Eddie's in his room, if you want me to get him?"
"You want your boy to see?" Hopper asks Steve.
Steve ducks his head, fiddling with the sleeves of his jacket. He mutters, "he probably will anyway."
"Ok. Do you want him here for this?"
"Here for what?" Eddie asks, hovering in the doorway, worried. "What's happened?"
"Nothing," Steve tries to say. "It's... really, it's nothing."
"Steve," Hopper calmly says. Waits for Steve to look back at him, simply raises an eyebrow. "Where?"
"Hopper, it's fine, really."
"Where?"
Steve tries to stare him down, unsuccessfully. He huffs, annoyed, glancing at Wayne and Eddie who, understandably, look confused.
He slowly takes his jacket off, keeping his eyes on the floor. There's a sharp intake of breath when the dark, almost black, bruises on his arms are revealed. They litter the entirety of both arms, the ones around his left wrist and right bicep standing out the most- the ones shaped like hands.
"Steve," Eddie whispers, walking forward slowly. He's careful, brushing his fingers against his skin. "Oh, baby, who did this?"
"It's fine," Steve tries to insist.
Hopper clears his throat though. "Where else?"
Steve doesn't try to argue this time. He grabs the back of his collar, lifting his top off. His ribs have the worst of his bruises.
"Fuck," Eddie carefully, gently, pulls Steve into a hug. Presses gentle, ever so soft kisses to his neck. His hand is just as gentle when he rubs his back. Steve clings to him, grip looking almost painful, but Eddie doesn't complain.
Hopper turns to Wayne, who is also pointedly looking away so the two can have their moment. "His parents are gonna try to find him. Direct them to me if they try here."
"Don't worry about Steve," Wayne glances at the pair, still wrapped around each other, at the bruises. "Worry about them. If they try to come by here, they'll be leaving in a body bag. I'm sick of assholes treating my kids like this."
Hopper looks over at Eddie, who's pulling back so he can hold Steves face, eyes painfully understanding. He nods at Wayne, pats his shoulder. "I'm getting the rest of his stuff, he's got no reason to go back there. It's my cabin he's coming home to."
"I'll drive him there myself," Wayne glances at the pair, who think they're being subtle and sneaky as they giggle their way towards Eddies room. "Tomorrow."
Hopper chuckles, glancing towards the hall the two disappeared down. "Tomorrow."
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woso-dreamzzz · 6 days
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Torn III
Kewis x Child!Reader
Summary: You're still sick
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Mommy doesn't get you dressed properly the next day.
She lets you stay in your pyjamas because you're sick. She's sick too but not as sick as you.
Mom, of course, still has her hurt knee but she's the only one not sick in the entire house.
Your head pounds and your nose remains stuffy even as you play with your dinosaur toys, making them attack each other because they're in a war and that's what things do in a war. They fight.
"Open," Mommy says and you firmly clamp your teeth together," Chook, I'm not joking. Open."
She's got a syringe full of medicine in her hands and you refuse to open your mouth.
You've never had good tasting medicine before and you refuse to believe that Mommy's gone out and bought some.
You keep your mouth shut.
"Chook," She says sternly," This will make you feel better."
You sniff, wiping your nose on your shirt and shake your head. You know if you talk, Mommy's going to dose you up so you settle on just glaring, puffing out your cheeks to show her that you're wise to her tricks.
"Chook," She says again," We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Either way, you're taking your medicine."
"Chook," Mom says from the sofa," Come here."
Warily, you skirt around Mommy and run over to Mom, who lifts you up to sit next to her. Immediately, she attacks your sides with tickles and you can't keep your mouth closed anymore, opening it to let out peals of giggles.
Mommy squirts the medicine down your throat and Mom's ticklish hands disappear.
You glare, eyebrows drawing together in outrage. "That was mean!" You say," You cheated!"
Mommy laughs, ruffling your hair. "It was sneaky," She says," Not cheating. You'll feel better soon."
You huff but know she's right, shuffling off the sofa to return to your toys.
Helen joins you, curling up next to your side. Her ear flicks a few times as you continue your dino war. You have to blow your nose a few times because it gets clogged but Mommy is right because the churning of your stomach settles and your head no longer feels like it does when you bang it on a wall by accident.
"What do you want to watch?" Sam asks, channel surfing as she keeps one eye on you playing with Helen.
Kristie sighs. She doesn't look as bad as you did but it's still clear she's sick. She's got a bit of a fever and the end of her nose is all red. "Something that requires me to not think," She groans, massaging her temples to stem off the headache. She's only recently taken her own painkillers so she has a bit of wait until they kick in.
"So trash reality tv?" Sam teases and Kristie whacks her with a pillow.
You're playing nicely on the rug with Helen and your dinosaurs despite how ill you are.
Maybe eating all that dirt gave you a stronger immune system than Kristie thought.
"There's Love Island," Sam offers and you whip your head around.
"No!" You say," That's mine and Auntie Millie's show! You can't watch it! It'll spoil it!"
You sound adamant and Kristie manages to get out a laugh that could have been a cough.
"It's not a new episode, Chook," Sam assures you with her own laugh," It's last season. It's not going to spoil anything."
Your brow furrows for a moment before you're up on your feet. You've got two dinosaurs clutched in your hands as you wiggle yourself between your mothers.
They're sitting close enough that their legs are touching so you make sure to force them apart so you can be comfortable.
"Last season was okay," You tell Kristie very seriously," I will watch with you so you know what's going to happen. Mom, you need to put on Love Island."
Sam keeps laughing. "Oh? I need to, do I Chook?"
"Yes. That's what I just said. You need to, Mom."
With the other options being Deal or No Deal and Flog It, Sam's pretty sure that Love Island was truly her only option and changes the channel.
Clearly, the medicine has perked you up a bit because Kristie doesn't get a moment of respite the entire episode as you narrate what's going on during every single little moment.
Somehow, you manage to put yourself to sleep during it until you're lying draped over Sam and Kristie's laps.
"And we just let Millie watch this show with her?" Kristie asks, dumbstruck and Sam chuckles nervously.
"I didn't think she actually absorbed this much of it," Sam replies," It's like she studied it or something."
You shift a little in your sleep, death gripping your plastic dinosaurs so hard that Kristie can't pry them from your hands.
"Well," Kristie says," At least she's taking her nap without arguing."
"You mean, at least you can take your nap without her interrupting," Sam teases and Kristie rolls her eyes.
She lifts your limp body easily into her arms as she stands up. "Well, just for that. I don't think you can join us for naptime."
"Hey...Kristie! Kristie, wait! I'm sorry! Wait for me!"
Kristie doesn't wait for Sam though as she makes her way to their bedroom.
She settles you in the very middle of the bed but slipping in next to you.
You wiggle a little bit as Kristie tugs you closer, laying a protective hand over your belly just as Sam hobbles in, taking her own place in bed on your other side.
Helen joins in too, leaping up onto the bed and curling herself up around your feet.
"You have to get her to take medicine when we wake up," Kristie says, already half asleep.
"No fair! She's wise to my tricks now!"
"Not my problem, Sam."
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asimpwithfreetime · 1 year
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Our baby (Yandere! Platonic! Sullys x sickly born! Daughter/sister! Reader)
Summary: Y/n was born sickly, scaring all her family a few times in her life with that condition. Now she is doing better but they are all overprotective of her now. (Just a bunch of cute fluff scenes with them and then yandere stuff)
General warnings: yandere behavior, yandere sully family, manipulating/ fear tripping yandere! Jake, violent! Neytiri, fights between Neteyam and Lo’ak, purring! Loak,
Content warnings: English isn’t my first language and this hasn’t been proofread.
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[ 3rd Person POV ]
The Sully family was really close, all of them orbiting around Y/n. Y/n was born sickly and usually got ill more times in a year.
Everyone took good care of her. From her protective parents to her little sister, Tuk. Do not forget about her three older siblings that would do absolutely ANYTHING for her.
Jake never let her do anything remotely dangerous, what if his baby got hurt? He wouldn’t survive it. Also, why did she need to know that, she already had him, right?
“You ready, baby girl?” Jake asked his daughter, bringing her close to his ikran. She wanted to fly with one but he didn’t let her. Instead, they could fly together. He helped her up and sat behind her. Once she steadied her posture, he held her in place and they started flying.
At first it was fun but suddenly, the ikran almost crashed into the ground a few times. Jake protected Y/n. She didn’t know he was doing it on purpose. She screamed and cried, holding her dad as a life line.
“There, there, my baby” he cooed once on land. “This is why I don’t let you fly, I don’t want you hurt” he said. She hugged him tightly in between sniffles.
Neytiri was at a whole other level. With a simple “NO” and a hiss she would have everything settled. She even blackmailed and threatened a bunch of Na’vi in the clan to tell her daughter off whenever she tried to sneak around. If other people convinced Y/n, she wouldn’t be the bad guy.
She would be always there for her. As the daughter of the Tsa’hìk she new a lot about medicine and she would cure her baby. She knew how fragile Y/n was and she wanted to protect her baby. She never got aggressive against her, but Neytiri would punch to literal pulp anyone who tried to tell Y/n she didn’t need her family on her all the time.
Neteyam needed Y/n as he needed to breathe. She was his everything. Jake was really stern on him and he could always run to Y/n and still be seen as a hero and a role model. He loved the way she admired her big brother. He liked being appreciated.
He has fought Lo’ak over who loved her more in the past, close enough to draw blood. Jake had stopped them but it was always the same. Neteyam would cuddle with Y/n whenever she was sick, even if it was contagious. He didn’t mind. If he got sick taking care and loving his baby sister, then so be it. Eywa sent him the mission of being there with her. And don’t even think about dating. Neteyam would get caught, but he would kill any boy that looked at her more than twice.
Lo’ak teases Y/n’s sickness sometimes, only if she was going to laugh or crack a smile. He loved her laugh, it made him fill useful. Y/n was his reason to go on. He would be lost without her. In a forest of darkness, she was his moon, his night sky and his guide. She didn’t know it, but she was.
He loved holding her close when she got better from an illness, hearing her heartbeat and purring happily lulling her to sleep.
Lo’ak loved to get on fights just to get treated by his sister, she had such a gentle care that he couldn’t deny it. And maybe he didn’t create fights sporadically. He would fight Na’vi he knew had a crush on Y/n. He would teach them a lesson.
Kiri wasn’t violent physically, but verbally. She had destroyed a lot of people just with the power of the word. And whenever someone made fun of her sister for being sickly or for being weak, or someone would DARE to be in love with Y/n, she would make their live a living hell.
With Y/n she was all soft and gentle. As Y/n wasn’t allowed out alone, Kiri would bring her flowers, rocks and everything interesting she found while going for a walk. That way Y/n could experiment the wonders of Pandora form the safety of her home.
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etherealising · 8 months
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interlude one | parle-moi
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↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣
pairing(s): carmy x claire | fem!reader x male!oc | carmy x fem!reader | platonic!mikey x fem!reader | platonic!richie x fem!reader | platonic!claire x fem!reader |
summary: a glance into the final couple of weeks of carmy and baby's senior year.
warning(s): 18+ | miscommunication | carmy | teenage angst | teenage stupidity | mentions of prom | vague mentions of terminal illness | steamy make out session | dry humping | mild petting | neck infatuation? | pining | semi-unrequited love | idiots in fucking love | please let me know if i missed something |
wc: 13.7k
song inspo: parle-moi
please don't let any graphics hinder your imagination of fem!reader/baby, you could imagine her as a fucking smurf for all i care. any pictures used are NOT a representation of baby they just fit the chapter!!!!
also i describe hayden as atj's character in kick-ass because that's what i was watching while writing this chapter but you could imagine him as rasputin or liteally whoever you're into.
but also like atj and jaw are literally the same person just different fonts ya know? happy reading!
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May 2013
Carmy watched as you manned the front of house at The Beef, you and Richie working seamlessly around each other as the both of you took turns at the cash register and running food to the customers who had decided to dine in. Carmy wouldn’t lie, he was a little miffed that Mikey had given you a job here but strictly forbade him from even thinking about working at The Beef, but it was okay because he had a plan. Carmy was going to pursue his dream of becoming a chef, not only that, he was going to become the best fucking chef he could be and prove to Michael exactly why he deserved to work alongside him at the family business.
It wasn’t necessarily fair for Carmy to be mad at you for earning yourself a job at The Beef, and he wasn’t. He knew you were only working there to save up money, he knew how badly you and your mom needed it. Things had gotten worse with your mom in the past two years. One of your aunts had come from the west coast to stay with the two of you as you finished up your senior year waiting to whisk the two of you away at the first chance she got. Carmy had met her a handful of times. She was nice he would give her that, but she always looked at him like she knew a secret he didn’t.
Leaning against the end of the counter as he waited for you to go on break, he watched as you made your way back from the dining area to the front, doing his best to capture your features. The slight sheen to your skin from running back and forth and the slight humidity that could be felt in the air. He took notice of the way your hair decorated your head, which pieces looked out of place. Carmy studied you with a curious eye, fingers drumming against the small sketchbook you had got him for his birthday. He had wanted to draw you for a while, and he tried once, but after picking out everything wrong with the drawing he decided that maybe your kind of features weren’t meant to be confined to the lines on a piece of paper.
Carmy watched as you laughed at something stupid Richie said, your laughter singing through the restaurant. Even as you turned to the window of the kitchen to share the joke with the rest of your crew, the large smile still hadn’t left your face.
You turned from the window removing the apron from around your waist as you approached Carmy, the remnants of laughter still on your face. You grabbed his hand pulling him along to the dining area where the two of you plopped down at your favorite corner table. The patrons are still there sending greetings to both of you. You nodded at Carmy’s sketchbook that now sat on the table, his hand lying flat atop it.
“Got anything new for me to look at?” You eyed the small book, always happy to look at whatever new drawing had taken over Carmy’s mind, even if they were of Claire.
Carmy followed your line of sight, a slight blush rising to his cheeks at your intrigue. He usually wouldn’t think twice about letting you parse through his artwork, your genuine interest always pushing him to keep up his hobby. “Uh, I’m not sure if you’ll want to see what’s in this sketchbook.”
Carmy’s fingers began drumming away again, the constant contact with the small book keeping him calm. You sent a teasing smile his way “Why afraid I’ll get tired of seeing your drawings of Claire?” You had meant for the quip to be a joke, although you were tired of seeing Claire’s face staring back at you through Carmy’s drawings, it wasn’t your friend's fault that she had stolen the heart of the boy you had been pining after for the better part of a year.
The frown on Carmy’s face told you that he may have taken offense to the slight joke, your teasing smile dropping as you felt the guilt creep in on you. “I don’t draw Claire that much do I?” The vulnerability in his tone catches you off guard.
You quickly shook your head wanting to appease him, “No Carm, guess I’ve just been around Mikey and Richie too much working here.” You sent him a small smile hoping to raise his spirits, “Word of advice though, some people might find it a bit weird if they knew someone was drawing them without their permission.” You leaned your head on the palm of your hand as you watched Carmy flush even more.
Carmy felt the heat of his blush rising on his neck and painting his cheeks an even deeper red, of course, you would think he was weird for randomly drawing your friend. His lack of experience and newfound fascination channeled into his drawings as he saw no other way to deal with his crush on Claire. He cleared his throat, eyes finding yours again, “Would you?” At the confusion on your face he swallowed, not wanting you to think him any weirder than he already felt, “Would you find it weird if I was drawing you?”
You watched Carmy sink into himself after asking you that question, your own heart melting a bit about the shyness Carmy exuded. “Carmen,” your hands reach out to clasp his between your own, “I would be flattered if you ever decided to draw me. Hell, maybe I’ll even commission you.” The ending joke is made to bring yourself back to reality, if Carmy was drawing you it wasn’t for the same reasons he was drawing Claire.
If it was possible for Carmy to blush even more, he was sure he would’ve looked like a tomato sitting in front of you. You always knew exactly what to say to stave his self-doubt, but recently your words had been more warming to him, something that he couldn’t explain. But he found himself hanging on to every word that left your lips a little bit more.
Before Carmy could get his response out Tina appeared by your table with two signature beef sandwiches for the two teenagers she had watched grow up. The two of you thanked her watching as she made her way back into the kitchen, not being able to spare a minute with the dinner rush starting soon.
You smiled up at Carmy before digging into your food, the warm bread and the seasoned beef caressed your tongue. You let out a sound of appreciation as you swallowed your first bite head tossing back to savor the flavors in your mouth. Carmy let out a small chuckle as he watched you, always finding your reaction to be overdramatic, he wouldn’t lie though, he was excited for the day he would earn that same reaction after you tried his food.
A content sigh escaped your lips as you wiped your mouth with the provided napkin, “I’m gonna miss this when I’m gone.” Carmy could hear the sadness in your voice, his own sense of sadness filling him as he remembered what fate held for the two of you after graduation. The two of you would be separated from each other in what felt like the first time in forever.
Carmy sat his sandwich down, slumping a little in his seat while trying his best not to bring the mood down, “You leave at the end of July right?” His question met your ears as you took in his kicked-puppy look, you remembered how well Carmy took the news when he found out. The betrayal on his face when he found out you chose to go to a college on the West Coast.
You nodded your eyes not meeting his as you tried to lessen the hurt in your heart. It's not like you wanted to be that far from Carmy but it really was out of your hands. Your mom and aunt decided it would be best to be closer to family amid your mom’s ever-declining health. “Yeah Carm, our flight leaves on the 31st.”
You took another bite out of your sandwich appetite dwindling, but not wanting to waste the food you know the crew loved making. The two of you finished your sandwiches in silence, neither of you wanting to talk about the future and more than happy just to sit in the other’s presence.
Reaching for Carmy’s plate you stacked your own on top of his before moving them onto the edge of the table, ready to take them when your break came to an end in five minutes. You sat up straighter in your seat imbuing yourself with confidence as you prepared yourself to broach the topic you weren’t sure Carmy even cared for.
“So Carm, prom is coming up, have you given it any thought?” Carmy knew you were trying to come across as nonchalant, but the gleam in your eyes told him otherwise. Hiding the small smile that graced his lips, he watched as you tried hard to act as though you didn’t care about prom. It was a bit funny to him.
“You know it's not really my scene Baby,” he watched as your shoulders slumped a bit. You had been expecting his answer so you weren’t sure why it affected you so much
You nodded your head, “Yeah, you’re right. Not sure why I brought it up.” You began playing with your fingers, you aren’t sure what you were hoping would be different this time compared to the other times you had brought it up to him. You knew Carmy wasn’t interested in you romantically, and you knew he wasn’t interested in going to prom, but you were holding out hope thinking he might pity you and join you at prom as your friend as one last hurrah before your big move.
Carmy felt bad, he didn’t mean to make you sad. He was just waiting for the right time to ask you. He knew how much prom meant to you, and had listened to you talk his ear off about going to your high school prom after your mom and his mom showed you pictures from their respective proms. He was still working up the confidence to do so though, every time he thought he was ready he would overhear the idiots in his homeroom with their own plans to ask you. Thankfully though you had rejected every advance, and what kind of friend would Carmy be if he asked you to prom at the dinghy sticky table in the back of his family’s business?
“I’ll think about it okay?” It was Carmy’s turn to reach for your hands, to assuage the sadness he could see overtaking your features. Your eyes met Carmy’s not sure if you had heard him correctly, you wouldn’t allow yourself to get too excited at the prospect that Carmy might want to attend the prom.
You sent Carmy a small smile and a nod before standing up from your seat and grabbing the two dishes still sitting on the table, “I’ll hold you to that Bear.” You headed towards the door to the kitchen disappearing from Carmy’s sight.
It was always odd for Carmy to hear you use that nickname for him. You had usually just stuck to ‘Carmen’ or ‘Carmy’ when you were feeling extra friendly. But hearing you call him ‘Bear’ always made his heart beat a little faster, the way the nickname left your lips making him feel warm on the inside. Knowing that such a special nickname had countlessly graced your tongue, a family name just for him that you had felt comfortable enough calling him always made his head fuzzy and his chest feel like it was on fire. The sound of the bell above the door snapped him out of his thoughts, he quickly gathered up his sketchbook, he didn’t know where he was headed, but hopefully, some fresh air would give him the courage he needed to finally ask you to prom.
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Your shift ended an hour ago, but you always stayed later to help the crew clean up. Mikey began giving you rides home as you took on more hours, the one plus side of working for your neighbor. At that moment Tina was helping you clean the front of the house her favorite oldies CD popped into the ancient radio, the two of you had created a tradition since you started working at The Beef. Tina would shoo Richie to the back to clean her area so the two of you could catch up.
Tina had taken you under her wing when you first started working there, teaching you what she could in her spare time. Although you had no plans to work in a kitchen anytime soon, you still cherished the time spent together taking what she taught you and using them in your kitchen. Happily sharing with Tina what your mom thought about a recipe she taught you and bringing one of your mom's famous recipes for Tina to try.
Being able to connect your mom and your work mom through food always brought warmth to your heart. The women in your life all doing their best to raise you to be the best woman you could be. As you and Tina finished cleaning up, the two of you headed to the dining area where you would usually wait for Mikey as he finished up whatever he was doing in his office and Tina would sometimes keep you company.
The two of you occupied the same table that had earlier housed you and Carmy. “So did Carmy get his head out of his ass and ask you to prom?” The smile on Tina’s face showed how excited she was to hear about your progress in getting Carmy open to going to prom.
You hid your face in your hands, your big smile hiding behind it, “He told me he’d think about it, which isn’t a no but, I’m too scared to get my hopes up,” You smiled in Tina’s direction watching as she nodded the smile never leaving her face.
“Mama, why don’t you just ask him yourself?” Tina questioned searching your eyes, your smile faltered as you listened to Tina’s question, why hadn’t you just asked Carmy? It would’ve given you a straight answer, and you wouldn’t have had to wait around while he was being indecisive.
Your eyebrows pinched together as you looked at Tina in earnest, “But what if he says no?” The self-doubt creeping in, of course, you would ask him as friends, you didn’t want to freak him out but insinuating you wanted something more, even though you did.
Tina shrugged her shoulders, a small warm smile decorating her features “You can’t control his reaction Mija.” She leaned forward to clasp your hands in hers, “If you don’t ask you’ll never know.” You could always count on Tina’s solid advice to ground you.
And she was right the worst thing that could happen if you asked Carmy to the prom was his swift rejection. But the answer would always be rejection if you never asked. Tina squeezed your hands as you nodded, letting her words sink in as you calculated the best way to ask Carmy to prom.
“I see the way you look at him mama, and listen,” one of her hands shot out to raise your chin so you were looking at her directly. “It’s going to hurt if he doesn’t feel the same way, but you can’t keep living ya life waiting for him. You can be there for him as much as you want, that’s fine ma, but at the end of the day you gotta remember you’re the only person who got you.”
You could feel the tears on your waterline threatening to spill out, leave it to Tina to serve you the most heartfelt advice on a random Thursday night at a dining table at The Beef.
“I’m not saying you gotta let go of your feelings for him, just don’t lose yourself waiting for that boy to come to his senses.” With that Tina patted your hands as she stood from her seat, coming to your side of the table and planting a loving kiss on your forehead.
“You get home safe now ma, a’ight, make sure Mikey ain’t driving all stupid with you in that car.” You laughed at the jab Tina made about Mikey’s driving.
Standing up the two of you embraced each other in a hug, you were grateful to have Tina in your, and you were grateful to have met the Berzattos because without them you wouldn’t have been able to make all the wonderful connections you have now.
You waited for Tina to grab her stuff so you could walk her out. The two of you exiting The Beef you stood outside the entrance watching Tina as she made her way down the street, waiting until her petite figure was officially out of your sight before heading back inside and locking the door behind you.
Venturing to the back you stopped in the office doorway, Mikey sitting in the desk chair as Richie leaned against the desk the two of them whispering fiercely between each other. You gently knocked on the wall hoping to catch their attention, you learned the hard way that being privy to any whispered conversation these two had was never worth it.
“Uh, I’m ready when you are Mikey,” you looked between the two of them, the two giving off a more sketchy vibe than they usually did.
“You uh, didn’t hear anything you weren’t supposed to did you?” Richie’s question caused you to frown. They were definitely doing some sketchy shit that you wanted no part in.
You rolled your eyes before bending down to pick up your backpack on the floor next to the door. “You two are so fucking weird,” you crossed your arms over your chest as you looked between the two of them. Mikey finally rose from his seat and tossed you the keys that were sitting on the desk.
“Hey! That’s rude you know, I think I’m fucking great,” Richie’s response caused a tired smile to form on your lips.
“Yeah Rich, you can be cool sometimes. Goodnight Rich, get home safe.” You sent a small wave his way before leading the way to the car parked in the back of the lot, wanting nothing more than to get home, shower, and bundle up in your warm bed.
You unlocked your door before quickly sliding in and reaching over to unlock Mikey’s door. Silently rushing him along and immediately turning on the heat as Mikey settled into his seat reversing out of the lot.
“What were you and Richie even doing anyway?” You looked over in Mikey’s direction as your hands were placed in front of the vents supplying warmth to your body.
Mikey smiled at you before facing the road again your curiosity was always something he could count on, “Just keeping the business afloat. Nothing to worry over.” You nodded along, no stranger to the many problems The Beef ran into. It shocked you sometimes that it was still up and running, but you knew Mikey always found a way to keep things going.
“How’s school?” The question gained your attention, one of these talks is almost mandatory between the two of you, Mikey checking in on you and in a not-so-subtle way checking in on Carmy through you. You couldn’t pretend you knew why it was so hard for them to just talk to each other, but you guessed any effort was effort.
“Alright, I guess, just preparing for finals. Oh, guess what?” The giddiness in your voice earned a chuckle from Mikey as he nodded for you to go on. “I’m planning to ask Carmy to prom, but like as friends you know?” It was a bit ironic that every Berzatto except the one that mattered knew about your crush, but according to them, you weren’t very subtle about it.
Mikey’s laugh crumbled your resolve a bit, you weren’t sure if he was laughing at you or your idea. You flicked his shoulder sure he couldn’t feel it through his jacket, he raised his hand as a way to ward off your attack. Not that it was doing anything to hurt him.
You watched as Mikey pulled into your driveway never forcing you to cross the street on late nights. His hand reached for the ignition turning the car off as he shifted to face you in his seat.
“You know I’m proud of you right?” you nodded as you listened to Mikey’s words. “You’re gonna do big fucking things, Baby, don’t forget about us little guys alright.” You laughed a little confused about where this topic of conversation was coming from.
“I could never forget about you Brother Bear.” You teased the childhood nickname you gave Mikey pulling his lips into a smile. “I’m gonna write about you one day Mikey, gotta remember you to do that.” You watched as he just stared at you eyes roaming over your face, you reached across the console pressing a quick kiss on his cheek before moving to get out of the car.
Mikey’s hand reached out to grab your arm, “You gonna look out for Carmy even when you leave right?” You nodded at the question, feeling no need to elicit a verbal response. “Just keep an eye out for me will you, you’re good for Carmy.” You had no plans to cut Carmy off after your move, the two of you already discussed the best ways to keep in contact, the best season to catch a flight in.
“Come on now Mikey, you Berzatto’s are stuck with me for life, you can’t get rid of me that easily.” You laughed as Mikey rolled his eyes
“Get your ass in the house, Baby, I told your mom I’d stop bringing you home so late,” you nodded, picking your backpack up from by your feet on the floor. You quickly walked to your front door turning back to send Mikey a wave as he watched you get in safely.
Mikey sighed as he easily parked the car in his driveway just across the street. It was selfish but he needed you to stay in Carmy’s life in whatever way you could manage. Carmy would need you, the role you played in his life making him a better person than he already was. Mikey just hoped for your sake that Carmy put in the effort to keep you in his life, his little brother honing in on the Berzatto family habit of self-sabotage.
Mikey would speak to Carmy about it, if there was one thing he would get his little brother to understand, it was that allowing you to walk out of his life would be a colossal mistake.
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Carmy was waiting for you in front of the school. Since getting your licenses the two of you had been taking turns driving the other to school, and today was his turn. He knew it would take you a good minute to make your way to the entrance since your class was located at the back of campus. It didn’t bother him though, it gave him a chance to try and calm his nerves. There was one week left until prom and he still hadn’t asked you.
He purchased the tickets a week ago. You had given him the perfect opportunity at lunch when you decided to spend the period getting help from your creative writing teacher.
Carmy just never felt like it was the right time to ask you, at least that’s what he was telling himself. In reality, he had plenty of opportunities, he just kept losing his confidence. Forcing him to constantly postpone the question he so desperately wanted answered.
For example, when he was visiting with your mom over the weekend and you were teaching him your mom’s famous peach cobbler recipe. He swore he was gonna ask you in the midst of baking, he knew you were into romantic gestures. Not that he wanted to go to prom with you romantically or anything like that. But then the two of you made a mess with the flour while trying to perfect your mom's homemade biscuits, flour getting everywhere including on the two of you.
Carmy decided as he watched you clean your face that right then was as perfect a moment as ever. The two of you were in high spirits enjoying each other's company, but then he watched as the evening light streamed through the kitchen window just perfectly. The sunlight lit up the features on your face he had somehow been overlooking for all the years he knew you. Your bright eyes and cheeky smile were solely trained on him.
And there he was standing in your mom’s kitchen, drowning in the attention you had always allotted especially for him. His smile faltered as he couldn’t help but just watch you at that moment, his breath hitched while his eyes skated over the planes of your face, the ache in his chest slowly dwindling his confidence. And Carmy decided he just couldn’t ask you that day. The timing wasn’t right. The two of you were a mess and he needed to find a bottle of Pepto Bismol asap.
So that’s how he ended up nervously waiting for you to exit school on a random Monday in May. Carmy made sure he was in the regular meeting spot as you two had dedicated it, out of the way of any other students. The two of you weren’t loners, well you weren’t, Carmy didn’t care too much for high school labels. But the two of you were fine being in each other’s presence with no need to include anyone else, and yeah sometimes you would run off with Claire or Hayden and try to invite Carmy, but Carmy didn’t need any of that. He got you and your attention every day of the week whenever he wanted, and for Carmy, that’s all he really needed.
Carmy finally spotted you making your way through the crowd of teenagers who were either waiting for their rides or just trying to prolong the day with their friends. An unconscious smile graced his features he had been waiting all day to finally just get things over with and pop the question. The two tickets held so tightly in his hands they were starting to crinkle. Letting out a deep breath, Carmy straightened up, wanting you to take his inquiry seriously, not sure his usual shyness would exhibit that he truly wanted to go to prom with you.
No longer able to wait, Carmy began walking in your direction, doing his best to avoid the bodies that didn’t care enough to pay attention to him. He made it halfway before the sight in front of him caused him to abruptly stop. Walking next to you was the tall boy he always felt himself feeling insecure around. Hayden had never shown Carmy any ill will and had even tried to include Carmy in conversation in the times he joined the two of you for lunch. But the teenager had something Carmy didn’t have; a reserve of confidence and natural charisma. The two of you had just met this year in your creative writing class and Carmy swore he would never hear the end of it.
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Hayden was drinking in all your attention right now, the two of you bouncing ideas off of each other for your creative writing final. You thought Hayden was cool since your first meeting at the beginning of the year. The two of you became instant critique buddies, always asking the other to analyze a class assignment before you submitted it. At times you had thought about inviting him to hang out with you and Carmy outside of school, but you didn’t want to make Carmy uncomfortable, so the two of you remained friends inside the confines of high school.
You laughed at one of Hayden’s outlandish ideas, knowing if he turned in a paper on the topic of whatever conspiracy theory he was into at the moment they would probably withhold his diploma.
“Hey, check it out,” your eyes followed the path Hayden’s finger was pointing at, a small scowl painting your face at the scene playing out in front of you. “Looks like Carmy finally asked Claire to prom.” The words made your ears buzz, and the tickets in your back pocket felt like they were on fire now.
The two of you watched in silence as Carmy and Claire traded shy smiles with each other before he handed her one of the two tickets in his hands. When he told you he’d think about it, you weren’t aware he would think about going with someone else. The hope in your heart immediately died out as you watched the bright smile overtake Carmy’s face. You didn’t blame him, if you had the opportunity to go to prom with your crush, you obviously would have taken it too.
“You good?” The nudge to your arm broke you from your longing gaze, eyes finding Hayden’s through his dorky glasses. You nodded trying to shake the sadness off yourself, Hayden was great at reading people.
“Yeah, actually,” you took a small breath before continuing. “I know this is kind of weird, and you’re totally allowed to reject me. But would you maybe wanna go to prom with me? It doesn’t have to mean anything obviously, just two friends having a good time together.” You slipped the two tickets out of your back pocket brandishing them to Hayden. Even if you couldn’t go with Carmy you still wanted to attend prom and Hayden was a great second choice.
“Hell yeah! I’ve been waiting for you to ask me.” The lame joke caused the both of you to laugh as you shoved Hayden’s shoulder. He took one of the tickets from your hand walking backwards while still facing you. “Don’t sell yourself short, maybe I want to go to prom with you to mean something.” His loud voice catches the attention of the teenagers surrounding you. A group of underclass girls fawning over how cute they thought the scene between you two was.
You watched as Hayden disappeared to his car, a small laugh leaving your lips at Hayden’s antics, a part of you feeling giddy at the idea that someone wanted to go to prom with you as more than friends.
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Carmy wasn’t sure how long he stood there staring at the interaction going on between you and Hayden, but it sure did suck the confidence right out of his insecure body. The thought of going to prom with you was just another failed idea as he was sure Hayden would ask you.
“You okay there Berzatto?” Carmy was snapped out of his trance by the presence that made their way to his side. His eyes shot to Claire’s, momentarily widening before he tried to calm his exterior. He nodded his head, giving himself a minute before even thinking of gracing Claire with an incoherent response.
“Ye-Yeah, just waiting for Baby,” his free hand raised to point in your direction as Claire smiled at him, eyes leaving him for only a moment. He dropped his hand not knowing how to continue the conversation, Claire was your friend and yeah he did have his fair share of classes with her, and she did only live down the street from the two of you. But he had never been alone with her on purpose.
The two of them stood in a stilted silence, both overcome by their shyness to say anything. Trying to ease the awkwardness Claire’s eyes landed on the tickets still tightly grasped in Carmy’s hands, finally finding an out to the silence. “I didn’t know you were into prom Carmy,” the statement reminded Carmy of what he had been planning to do in the first place.
One hand raised to run through his slightly grown-out hair, head nodding rapidly in response, “Yeah, Baby seems to be really into it.” Carmy didn’t notice Claire’s smile falter, of course, he was taking you to prom, you were the only girl that existed to him.
Carmy finally faced the girl standing next to him. The least he could do while waiting for you was hold a conversation with her. “Did you want to go?” Carmy watched Claire’s smile brighten, a confused look painting his features. Not realizing that with his overall awkward and shy personality, the girl in front of him thought this was his way of asking her to prom.
“With you?” She questioned the giddiness in her voice, easy to point out. Carmy’s eyes widened this time, this was definitely not his original plan. But he couldn’t just say no and turn her down he would’ve felt bad, plus he did have a huge crush on her, and Mikey and Richie had both told him to stop being such a pussy when it came to girls. So Carmy realized he had his answer.
“Yeah with me, i-if you want to I mean,” Carmy waited with bated breath hoping he hadn’t read the situation wrong. If Claire’s blush and wide smile were any indication he was on the right track. He raised the hand that contained the tickets between the two of them, plucking one out and offering it to Claire.
Their hands brushed as she reached for the ticket, Carmy’s smile matching hers as they fell into polite small talk about their day and their plans for after graduation.
“Don’t sell yourself short, maybe I want going to prom with you to mean something,” the sound of what they both knew to be Hayden’s voice drew their attention. They watched the fading interaction between you and Hayden, Carmy’s attention zeroing in on a laugh he heard over a hundred times.
The squeeze on his bicep removed his attention from you, eyes falling back to the girl he had just asked to prom, albeit accidentally. “They’re so cute! I can’t believe they’re going to prom together,” Claire’s excitement had somehow increased after Hayden’s obnoxious display. “Hey, maybe we can carpool,” It was wrong but Carmy couldn’t get himself to focus on the words leaving Claire’s mouth, too busy watching you watch Hayden.
“Oh hey, my mom’s here. We’ll figure it out later, see ya Carmy.” He sent a noncommittal nod in Claire’s direction, a slight wave sent to her mom who was patiently waiting in the car. Eyes immediately went back to your figure that had finally begun to make its way in his direction, the smile on your face confusing him. You didn’t like Hayden did you?
Carmy watched as you stopped in front of him before your hand reached out to shove his shoulder, “Why didn’t you tell me you were asking Claire to prom?” Carmy wasn’t sure why but your question irked him, the excitement in your voice crawling under his skin. It’s not like he had to run his whole life by you, you obviously didn’t.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were asking Hayden to prom?” The hostility in Carmy’s tone and the frown on his face confused you, “You just asked him to prom so he’ll sleep with you.” Your eyes widened at Carmy’s insinuation that the only reason anyone would go to prom with you was to fulfill their carnal desires.
You scoffed rolling your eyes at his immaturity, “You have an ugly fucking attitude, Carmen.” The shove of your shoulder into his as you stormed off to the car cooled his anger down.
Carmy had no clue what the fuck had been going on with him, with the two of you recently. But he knew he needed to cool it with these mood swings before you decided to leave him behind for good. He only had you for the rest of the summer before your constant presence in his life would disappear. He didn’t want to give you a reason to cease all contact after your move. Carmy followed after you knowing it would be a silent car ride home.
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Prom Night | Saturday
The week leading up to prom had been the most awkward week between you and Carmy since the dawn of your friendship. It's not like you were giving him the cold shoulder, but you sure weren’t as nice and friendly as you usually were with him. You only spoke to him out of necessity that week, your friendship with him on rocky ground after the accusation he threw your way.
It had gotten so bad that you had even begun inviting Claire and Hayden to your’s and Carmy’s self-proclaimed lunch table. You had told Carmy it was under the guise of figuring out the plans for prom night, but you just didn’t want to sit alone with Carmy as he acted like everything was fine between the two of you. And Carmy knew two, and if he was brave enough he would’ve admitted that it hurt to see you so upset with him to the point that you were no longer comfortable in just his presence.
He had even broached the topic to Sugar, hoping she would be able to give him advice since she was a teenage girl at one point, and probably understood your thought process better than he did. He regretted the decision immediately when she explained to him that because of the situation, he should be more worried about the way his words hurt you, rather than his feelings of you distancing yourself from him. She had gone on a long tangent about how you had every right to want space from him, the two of you were longtime best friends, and having someone you trust with your whole life deduce you to just your body would make anyone question the friendship. Carmy learned the hard way that Sugar wasn’t going to tell him what he wanted to hear just to make him feel better.
It was a tough week for Carmen Berzatto and it was nobody's fault but his own. Sitting on his bed he stared at the suit he would be donning tonight, the excitement he once held for prom, slowly dwindling with every smile you saved for Hayden that week. Every time you asked for Hayden’s advice before Carmy’s he felt his resolve cracking, for a constant time in his life your friendship with him was the only thing that truly belonged to him.
He wasn’t used to having to share your attention with anyone outside of his and your family. He wasn’t prepared for the smile he thought was reserved just for him, to so easily graced your lips when speaking with Hayden
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You and Claire were getting ready together at your house, you had invited the girl to join you after she explained her mom would be out of town for a business meeting. The friendship between the two of you was still rather new, you wouldn’t go as far as to call her your best friend, but she was your first close girlfriend and you thought that counted for something.
Claire was easy to be friends with. She was a sweet girl with a bright personality and the two of you wondered how you had lived on the same street all this time and never became friends before senior year. Claire was easy to be friends with; that is until Carmy decided he liked her. After that day it was no longer just you and Carmy, it was you, Carmy, and Claire. And Claire was never even actually physically there, she was just a topic of conversation that Carmy couldn’t go a day without somehow bringing up.
You didn’t blame Claire though, how could you? And just as naturally you watched as your new friend fell for your oldest one. It hurt in the beginning to realize Carmy would never speak of you the way he spoke of Claire, but as time went on you got over it, the mantra ‘if Carmy’s happy, I’m happy’ slowly getting you through senior year. But it was agonizing when Claire confessed to you she had fallen for your shy doe-eyed shadow.
Luckily for you though the two of them were too shy to ever do anything about it. And maybe you were a shit friend for not telling Carmy that he did have a chance with his dream girl, but you would’ve been an even worse friend for revealing Claire’s secret behind her back. It was a lose-lose situation. So now you were relegated to being the middleman, lending both of your friends an ear to talk about their infatuations with each other.
And that’s exactly what you were doing right now as you listened to Claire drone on about how sweet Carmy was. And how cute he looked when he asked her to prom, and if you thought he would look good in his suit tonight; which yes, you did but Claire didn’t need to know that. You were almost starting to regret inviting her over, but you had to remind yourself it wasn’t her fault that you were too scared to admit your feelings to Carmy, or that you should’ve just asked Carmy to prom yourself with no hesitation.
“Which color?” Claire’s voice broke you from your pity party, the two of you sitting on the floor in front of your mirror, your respective makeup set out in front of you. You looked at the two eyeshadow palettes Claire was pointing at, quickly pointing at the one color palette that would work best with her blue-green eyes.
“I think these colors will make your eyes pop,” the small smile on your lips encouraging Claire to take your advice. “Can I be honest with you?” You were unsure that you wanted to have this conversation with Claire, but you’d always have Carmy’s best interest at heart.
Claire shifted to face you, your serious tone drawing her undivided attention. “Just be careful with Carmy, okay?” Your eyes flickered between hers to make sure she understood the gravity of what you were saying. “Not in a bad way or anything, it's just…he really likes you. And he’s not that experienced in the romance department, so just don’t expect too much of him,” you paused, eyes going down to watch as your fingers picked at the hem of your robe.
“He’s shy, ya know, and he’s a little self-conscious even though he does not need to be because he’s so cool once you get to know him. But if he seems a little clueless or doesn’t pick up on your queues, just don’t hold it against him okay? I know he’s going to try not to mess things up with you Claire.”
Your eyes found Claire’s face again, a small endearing smile on her lips, “You care about him a lot.” You laughed not meaning for it to sound as sarcastic as it came across, you did a lot more than care about Carmy. “I’m glad Carmy has a friend like you in his life,” Claire’s hand patted your knee, the truth in her words causing your heart to sink a little in your chest.
“Enough about me and Carmy, I didn’t know you were into Hayden!” The two of you giggled about the fact you were talking about boys and getting ready for prom, neither of you thought you’d be in this situation right now.
“I’m not. We’re just going as friends,” you said as the two of you began to paint your faces. “Well make sure he knows that.” You put down the lip liner you were examining, eyes flashing to Claire as she shot you a goofy smile.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You watched as Claire rolled her eyes at your obliviousness, you threw a makeup brush at her that she easily swatted away. “I’m just saying” the other girl’s hands raised in defense, “Hayden has like the biggest crush on you, he’s just too nonchalant to say anything.”
“Really?” The surprise in your voice stole a laugh from Claire. “Of course! Look, you didn’t hear this from me but he had plans to ask you to prom. You just beat him to the punch.”
You watched Claire for a minute as she resumed doing her makeup. Your own eyes find your figure in the mirror, a shy smile curving your lips. Maybe your head had been so far up Carmy’s ass you were too blind to see that there was another great guy out there ready to make you happy.
You thought of the advice Tina had given you a few weeks back, you would always care for Carmy. But if he was getting his happy ending tonight, it was only fair that you tried as well. As you and Claire sat there chit-chatting and getting ready, you thought about how different your life would be if you set your feelings for Carmy aside, and tonight was the best time to figure it out.
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You and Claire made your way across the street to the Berzatto household where everyone was waiting for the two of you. Your mom and aunt left 30 minutes ago, Donna having invited them over for dinner while you all attended prom. You saw Hayden’s car parked in front of their house and couldn’t help but feel excited at the idea of spending such a fun night with him, you had only ever seen him as a friend but maybe tonight could change things.
You were pretty sure Donna was snooping through the windows excitedly waiting for the two of you to arrive because the moment your foot hit the sidewalk Donna threw the door open with a loud voice surprising the two of you.
“Oh my goodness! Look at you girls, you look beautiful!” Donna exclaimed as she made her way towards the two of you pulling Claire into a hug before throwing her arms around you, careful to mind the bulky Polaroid camera in her hand.
Removing yourself from the hug you peered behind her to see everyone else filing out of the house. Your aunt helped your mom as she talked Nat’s ear off about something you couldn’t hear. Mikey and Richie do their best to interrogate a calm Hayden, and Carmy awkwardly follows behind at the back of the pack, his suit hugging him well.
You were quickly pulled away from your assessment of Carmy as Nat made her way to you with a huge grin on her face. “Baby! Oh my goodness!” Her words became muffled as she pulled you into a hug. “You look so gorgeous, Carmy is such a tool. Well, no offense to Claire.” You let out a small laugh as you parted from Natalie, the two of you joining everyone else so the picture-taking could begin.
Before joining Claire and Carmy you stopped by Mikey and Richie to pick up your date, hoping they hadn’t gone overboard with the ‘intimidating older brother’ act. Squeezing in between the two older men you looped your arm around their torso pulling them into a double-side hug.
“Are tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumb giving you a hard time Hayden?” The words leave behind a mock pout on your lips. You gave Hayden a bright smile, easily taking his suited figure in, he had forgone his round dorky glasses. But his signature unruly dark curls were in their usual mess atop of his head, and you would admit you appreciated it.
You watched as the once apprehensive look on his face turned into a bright grin at your words, a pretty blush painting his angular cheeks. “Wow, you look uh-”
“She looks what buddy?” Mikey’s tone left no room for questions, his arms moving to cross against his chest widening his stance to appear more intimidating.
“You look pretty.” You weren’t even given a second to respond as Mikey started in again.
“I look fucking pretty to you? Richie, this boy just call me pretty?” Mikey’s eyes never left Hayden’s even as his question was directed at Richie.
You watched as Richie copied Mikey’s stance, your arms falling from their movements. “Yeah Mikey, I think he fucking did.”
“Richie’s a looker too, you gonna call him pretty?” You watched as Hayden fumbled with his words, eyes searching yours for any help.
“Yeah Curly Sue, I wanna be fucking pretty too.” You weren’t sure how the conversation had gotten so out of control but luckily for you, your mom was there to save the day. Pulling Hayden’s attention to a conversation so he could escape your two personal bodyguards.
“You two stop giving that poor boy a hard time.” Mikey and Richie having no defense against your mom, let him join her as Donna came up to the three of you for a picture.
You resumed your initial position with them, arms finding their way back around their torsos. The two of them leaned down to press a kiss against both of your cheeks, a cheesy smile taking over your features as the three of you posed for Donna’s camera.
“Okay Baby, grab your cute little date and take some photos,�� Donna motioned you over to where Nat was finishing up the couple photos of Carmy and Claire, now waiting for you and Hayden.
You maneuvered yourself from Mikey and Richie’s grip standing in front of them, the two of them looking at you with smirks decorating their faces. Although you found their antics to be stupid, you were glad to have people in your life who cared enough about you to try and scare your dates away.
“This kid not weird or some shit is he Baby?” Mikey scowled at you, arms finding their way across his chest. You shook your head, you thought you knew enough about Hayden to vouch for him. “No, he’s just a friend. It was a last-minute decision.” The two men stared at the boy who was waiting for you to take pictures with him, the pretty flower corsage in a box in his hands.
Mikey nodded in his direction signaling for you to go and join him, “You guys stop by The Beef after. Don’t want you and Carmy getting into any stupid shit.” You nodded before making your way to Hayden’s side. His smile caused one to grace your lips as well.
“Everybody wants pictures of us but uh, I need to give you this first.” You smiled as he shyly showed you the corsage, you watched as he removed it from its box. You held out your hand as he carefully slipped it on your wrist, surprised to see how perfectly the colors chosen complimented your skin tone.
You couldn’t help but share a small smile with him when the two of you caught each other’s eyes again. “Thank you, Hayden, it's beautiful.” The click of a camera drew your attention, eyes finding Nat’s as she looked at the image on her digital camera.
“Awe Baby! The two of you are so cute, okay give me a few poses.” Carmy couldn’t help but watch as Sugar gushed over you and Hayden, his mom keeping Claire’s attention as they discussed whatever it was they were so enraptured in.
He watched as the two of you took photos as if you were a couple and not just two friends going to prom. The two of you stood in the standard prom pose looking like the perfect match, Hayden standing behind you with his hands wrapped around your waist, the two of you smiling happily at the camera. The position changed slightly as Hayden rested his chin on your shoulder for one shot, slightly turning his head for the next shot so his lips caressed your cheek. From Carmy’s vantage point, you didn’t seem to mind.
Carmy was pulled into Mikey’s side as his older brother wrapped his arm around his shoulder. The two of them watch you and your date in silence for a moment. “Baby’s growing up isn’t she?” The question was not something Carmy was expecting from Mikey.
“Do me a favor and look out for her Carmy alright?” Carmy nodded, no one ever needed to ask that of him. “Better start treating her right before this becomes your feature.” Mikey looked down at Carmy hoping to drill the words into his younger brother, sending one more squeeze to his shoulder and an encouraging smile his way before leaving to join Richie in conversation with your mom and aunt.
Sugar caught Carmy’s eye, a melancholy smile on her lips, “Carmy come, let me get a picture of you and Baby together!” He looked to his mom and Claire, the two of them giving him nods of encouragement. He gently took the Polaroid camera from his mom's hand knowing you’d like at least one Polaroid of the two of you before heading in your direction.
He approached you and Hayden as the two of you were having a quiet conversation, “So if I potentially called you baby non platonically how would you feel about that?” Carmy wanted to gag and was relieved as he watched you roll your eyes at the cheesy pickup line.
“Eww, actually please don’t,” Carmy stood there in silence watching how chummy the two of you were and feeling awkward for just listening.
“You’re right, my girl has a better ring to it.” Carmy’s eyes widened he had no idea where the fuck this kid's confidence was coming from but it sure was starting to piss him off. He watched your mouth hang open partially at a loss for words apparently just as appalled as Carmy.
The hand reaching up to cup your chin almost sent Carmy into a full spiral, “Close your mouth, can’t have my girl swallowing flies.” Camry was about to blow his shit! Who the fuck did this model-looking motherfucker think he was?
“Hey, pretty boy! None of that slick shit in my yard!” Carmy had never been more thankful for Mikey’s obnoxious personality, watching as you and Hayden laughed together looking thick as thieves.
He quickly took his opportunity to squeeze his way into the space Hayden had once taken up. Carmy could feel the tension as he stood next to you, he quickly handed the Polaroid off to Sugar so she could take the picture before making his way back to your side.
Neither of you spoke a word as you got into position standing in a side hug so the awkward tension between the two of you wouldn’t be as noticeable in the final photo. As you fixed yourself to make sure you were presentable, Carmy found himself enraptured with you carefully sliding his arm around your waist.
The way you had chosen to style your hair was something he wasn’t accustomed to. The new style allows the angelic planes of your face to be showcased, the apples of your cheeks and your cheekbones catching his eye. The pretty sparkly stuff on your eyelids catching the dimming sunlight he was almost tempted to touch it. He liked the earrings you had chosen and the way the pearls sat so prettily around your neck he wanted to trace each one.
The square neckline of your dress showcased your perfectly sculpted collarbones. Carmy was so lost in his study of you he hadn’t thought twice about running his thumb across the one closest to him. The touch tickled you enough that your body was now slightly turned into his. Carmy cleared his throat, “Uh…um there was a bug.” He watched as you nodded along with his lame excuse.
Your hand came up to smooth out his pocket square that sat atop his heart. Carmy caught your eye before you could face the camera head-on, he gave your waist a slight squeeze to give himself a boost of confidence. Carmy watched as you stared up at him questionably the two of you just staring at each other for a moment.
Carmy’s eyes darted over your face, taking in your features before losing himself to the shape of your lips for a moment. “I think you look beautiful tonight Baby.” The words left Carmy’s lips with no sense of apprehension, no shyness. He was sure of himself; sure of his statement.
You had leaned into him a little bit more, your eyes rapidly blinking as your brain realized what he said. Carmy watched as a small shy smile graced your lips, his own soon following as he realized just how important it was to keep that pretty smile in his life.
Unbeknownst to the two of you Sugar had watched the whole moment play out, quickly raising the Polaroid to capture the intimate moment between the two of you. A moment she was hoping would finally lead to more between the two of you.
“Thank you Carmy,” Carmy watched as you leaned in slightly before stopping yourself and quickly readjusting so you were facing Sugar head-on. Carmy wasn’t sure what had changed between the two of you in these last couple of weeks but as Carmy forced himself to look away from you, he found himself thankful for whatever ushered in that change.
Carmen Berzatto knew at that moment, he would want for no one else the way he did you. And he would spend every day for the rest of his life proving that he was enough for you.
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You and Hayden were leaning against his car as the two of you watched Carmy walk Claire down the street to her own house. Hayden had volunteered to drive you all to prom, and when your fun was done there happily drove you all to The Beef, excited to try the sandwiches you couldn’t stop raving about.
And now the night had come to an end, the four of you all ending back up at your starting destination. You thought the media embellished high school prom a bit, but you hadn’t regretted your decision to go and were happy to have spent such a memorable night with people whose company you enjoyed.
Hayden’s arm was brushing against yours, his suit jacket almost swallowing you up. You were grateful for the jacket, the night growing colder as time went on. The two of you were calmly standing in each other’s presence, the silence not bothering either of you. Tonight with Hayden was fun, you enjoyed how goofy he was. Always doing what he could to make you smile and laugh, you were scared things might have been awkward due to the romantic undertone of the event.
“I had a really good time tonight Hayden, thank you for being my date.” You couldn’t help the shy smile on your lips, you were sure your cheeks would be sore from smiling the whole night away.
Hayden sent you a bright smile of his own head nodding along, “Me too, I’m glad you decided to ask me.” The two of you stood there for a moment just smiling at each other.
In the movies, this was usually the moment a kiss would happen. But you weren’t sure if you wanted Hayden to kiss you, you enjoyed his company and you thought he was a great guy but you didn’t feel anything romantic for him yet and didn’t want a single kiss to lead him on.
You leaned up slightly, your lips caressing his cheek as a form of thanks. “Maybe…we could hang out some other time?” If you were really going to put your happiness first it would be necessary to put yourself out there.
“I’ve got you till the end of July don’t I?” Your eyes find Hayden’s cheeky smile as his hand raised your chin. You nodded eyes searching his face, wondering what these next two months might hold for the two of you.
His thumb began to rub back and forth on your chin, your breath hitching as you watched him lean down. Mind going blank, panic filling you as you tried to figure out if this was something you wanted. You stood still, nerves racing through your body as you were about to have your first kiss.
You watched as Hayden’s eyes flicked to the side before he reluctantly stepped back, thumb brushing your chin one final time before his hand returned to its side. You followed his line of sight to see Carmy approaching, standing a little distance away to wait for you.
Turning back to Hayden you sent him one last smile, the boy pulled you into a hug engulfing you with a slight kiss pressed to the top of your head before the two of you moved apart. You quickly slipped off his jacket before handing it to him, moving back so he could get in his car. You watched as he sent Carmy a small nod in goodbye before his car disappeared down your street.
Letting out a small sigh you turned to where Carmy was waiting for you a shy smile on his face. You smiled back as you approached him the two of you walking up the sidewalk to his front door, you knew your mom and aunt would still be here at this time.
The two of you entered the house greeting the four women that were sitting in the living room having their small party. Questions were thrown at both of you about your time and making sure your dates made it home safe all the usual questions to be expected after prom. You listened as your mom told you that you would be leaving soon. Knowing that when it came to your mom soon could mean in the next five minutes or the next two hours.
Your eyes found Carmy’s as you let out a small yawn, his eyebrows raising in question before nodding towards his room. You made your way to follow him up the stairs too tired to contribute to the conversation happening in the living room.
Entering Carmy’s room you made your way to the foot of his bed to sit down, quickly removing your heels a sense of relief filling you. Dropping your heels you watched as Carmy stood by his door looking as though his mind was racing. You smiled at him patting the spot next to you, a sort of peace offering.
“How was your night, Carmy?” You watched as he made his way to sit next to you, head falling to rest on his shoulder as you awaited his response.
“It was fun, yeah, Claire was really nice.” You watched as he blushed, you might have felt a little sad any other night but right now you were too exhausted to care.
“Why didn’t you kiss Hayden?” The question hit you like a shot of espresso. You raised your head from Carmy’s shoulder trying to find his eyes as he kept his head focused on his clasped hands. “I don’t know, I don’t think it felt right.” You genuinely had no good explanation for Carmy, you didn’t even have one for yourself.
“Did you kiss Claire?” Your question came off a little more hostile than you had intended. Carmy sat up, eyes finally meeting yours as he shook his head. You felt guilty at the relief that flooded through you.
“No, it didn't feel right.” You let out a small laugh at the recycled explanation, a similar one leaving Carmy’s lips as he didn’t take his eyes off of you.
“Gosh we’re such losers,” you giggled, bumping your shoulder with Carmy’s. “I thought for sure you would’ve taken your chance to kiss Claire tonight.” You wiggled your eyebrows in a teasing manner, the ice that had been ruining your friendship this past week seemingly forgotten.
Carmy gulped as he continued to study you. “Maybe she wasn’t the girl I wanted to kiss tonight,” Carmy’s words caused your joking mood to quickly sober up, the smile disappearing from your face completely as you realized just how intently he was staring at you.
“Carmy,” your voice trailed off, not sure what the boy in front of you was getting at. You stood up needing a bit of space to understand the underlying message in Carmy’s words. “Carmy, what are you talking about?”
He followed your movements, the two of you both standing up now, faces inches apart. You couldn’t help but follow Carmy’s tongue as it quickly traced his lips, your own coming out to wet yours. The room was silent as you waited for Carmy to say something, anything. Your heart began to beat faster as the 10 words Carmy spouted in your direction gave you a sense of hope.
Your breath hitched as you watched Carmy’s hand raise, his eyes falling to your neck. You felt his fingers delicately trace the path of borrowed pearls, each touch leaving behind a whisper of something you couldn’t place. You allowed him to continue, too nervous to say anything at that moment.
His hand began to trace its way up the side of your neck, soft touch making your knees weak. He looked to be in a trance lost in the idea of you. A gasp escaped your lips as his hand gripped the side of your neck, fingers gently tugging the hair at the nape of your neck.
Carmy couldn’t explain it, but this, you standing so beautifully in his room right now, lips parted slightly as you waited for him to make the final move felt right. It felt so right it didn’t matter who either of you went to prom with, it didn’t matter that this would be the first kiss for both of you. What mattered was that it was you here with him; you who had always been with him, he would’ve given everything to be deserving of you.
The small nod of your head was the last sign Carmy needed before he surged forward capturing your lips in a harsh kiss. The two of you were so inexperienced your teeth clashed together. The roughness brought the both of you back down to earth, you couldn’t help but laugh at how awkward that first kiss was. You didn’t even think it could even be considered a kiss, more so a smack of lips against each other.
You watched the shy blush rise on Carmy’s cheeks, you could tell he was feeling self-conscious about the whole situation. Your hand raised to gently caress the hand that was still placed on the side of your neck.
Eyes locked you sent him a warm smile leaning in slightly a small whispered “c’mere” breathed between the two of you as you gently pressed your lips into his. Your eyes closed as you felt Carmy relax into the embrace, a sigh leaving his lips as he tugged you closer by the hand wrapped around your neck.
The two of you pulled apart eyes fluttering open as you drank in each other. Neither of you say anything for a moment, the room is filled with the sounds of your soft breathing. You couldn’t believe this was finally happening, all these months of unrequited feelings and secret pining, and here you were kissing Carmen Berzatto in his bedroom.
You watched as Carmy let out a shy laugh, thumb caressing the space behind your ear. Your smile matched his, the two of you watching the other with goofy smiles playing on your lips.
“Can I-,”
“Yes.”
Carmy gave you no chance to finish your sentence before he eagerly agreed and surged back in to kiss you. His lips felt like heaven against your own, you had wondered what this moment would feel like if it ever happened. If Carmy’s lips felt as soft as they looked, what would their natural taste be like?
The kiss continued as Carmy’s tongue poked out to shyly glide across your lips, you smiled into the kiss before parting your own. Easily inviting him in, the two of you languidly moved in sync, no battle to be fought as the two of you enjoyed the caress of each other’s mouths.
You couldn’t help but moan into Carmen’s mouth a hunger you didn’t know you had finally being satisfied. The small tug on your hair caused your mouth to open wider, the kiss becoming sloppy as the two of you gave in to your desires. You felt Carmy’s hand delicately trace your neck, his infatuation constantly leading him back to it.
The bite on your lip caused a harsh gasp to leave your lips, Carmy quickly pulling away at the noise. He looked at you with wide fearful eyes scared that he hurt you, ruining a good moment too soon.
“I - I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to.” Seeing Carmy so worried and vulnerable at the moment sent a thrill of warmth through your body. Your confidence grew as his faded, you took a small step into his space backing him up into the foot of the bed which caused him to resume his sitting position.
You could get used to looking down at Carmy.
You raised the hem of your dress so you could maneuver yourself into his lap, arms going to wrap around his neck. Carmy watched you like a deer in headlights, this new sense of confidence making you feel brave. As Carmy sat there like a statue you gently removed your hands from around his neck to guide his to your waist.
His hands squeezed your hips as you quickly adjusted yourself in his lap, Carmy’s eyes following the hem of your dress as it moved up more exposing your thighs. “Won’t you kiss me again Carmy?” The small whisper bounced off of Carmy’s lips due to your proximity, you watched as he rapidly nodded his head, hands squeezing your hips for dear life. You gave him a small smile before the both of you surged forward eager to be connected again.
As the kiss between you deepened you began unconsciously rolling your hips into Carmy’s the feel of his lips searing into yours making you want more. You listened as a strangled noise left Carmy’s lips before he pulled away again, you quickly stopped your ministrations.
“Is this okay, do you want me to stop?” The question caused Carmy’s head to rest against your rapidly rising and falling chest.
“No-no I-I just need a minute.” You were beginning to feel guilty, maybe you had come on too strong and Carmy was just confused about his feelings. You began moving to get off of his lap not wanting him to be any more uncomfortable than he probably was.
You stopped as a blissful sigh escaped Carmy’s lips, his eyes finally moving to meet yours. You sat there silently as the grip on your hips tightened a sigh parting your lips as Carmy bucked up into you while he guided you back and forth. The direct eye contact somehow increased the sensation between the two of you.
“I-I like it when you move like that.” You nodded along to Carmy’s words, continuing the movements yourself as Carmy’s lips found your neck trailing open-mouth kisses on any bare piece of skin he could. One hand quickly reached up, sliding the thin strap of your dress down, so he could finally appreciate your collarbones in the way they deserved.
In all honesty, neither of you had any clue what the hell you were doing, but whatever it was, it was working. No matter how messy the touches were, or how sloppily you were kissing each other every movement felt right.
Carmy was lavishing your chest and neck in any way that he could, kisses trailing over each collarbone. An impromptu bite in the space where your neck and shoulder met caused your breath to hitch. Your hips created a rhythm against his as the two of you lost yourself to the bliss.
A loud knock at the door interrupted the two of you. Carmy quickly removed his lips from your neck, doing his best to shield your body in case someone walked in. Neither of you knew how long it had been, too caught up in losing yourself to each other, too caught up to realize how far things had almost gone.
The knock sounded again as your aunt said your name, “We’re heading out, meet us downstairs.” Footsteps leading away from the door calmed the nerves both you and Carmy had been feeling, eyes peeling away from the door to match with each other.
No one said a word as the two of you stared at each other, you taking in Carmy’s flushed appearance. As he admired your disheveled figure above him, the confidence quickly left your body as you shuffled to get off of his lap.
The hand on your hip stopped you as you eyed him curiously, he slowly reached up to fix the straps that he had slid off of your shoulders, the slow shy touches caused your head to spin. He helped you stand up before adjusting the hem of your dress. You quickly glanced away as he tried to subtly adjust himself.
The shout of your name from downstairs forced you to rush to his bathroom mirror to fix any obvious differences in your appearance. By the time you came back, Carmy was holding one of his knit crew necks out for you to slip on.
His hand reached up to scratch the back of his neck, “Uhh, it's cold outside.” You smiled gratefully before slipping the crew neck on, quickly scooping up your heels as you made your way to the door. You turned around facing Carmy one last time with a wide smile on your face, you leaned in prepared to end the night with a sweet kiss.
Carmy leaned in pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead, the two of you scoring the intimate moment. Carmy couldn’t help but smile as he watched you leave wearing his knit crew neck, part of him hoping it smelled of your scent upon its return.
Carmy hadn’t expected the night to take the turn it did, but he was thanking his lucky stars that you went along, no questions asked. Neither of you knew what this meant for the future of your friendship, or if this would blossom into something more. But the two of you were both lost in the bliss of your actions to think too long on it for the rest of the night.
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Sunday Evening
You hadn’t seen much of Carmy over the rest of the weekend, instead spending the free time with your mom and aunt. You also weren’t quite sure how to approach him, and the fact that he hadn’t approached you either signified you were both at a standstill, neither of you sure how to broach the topic.
It was Sunday evening and you were on your way to The Beef picking up an extra shift after Mikey called to ask if you could come in. Richie had to leave early for whatever the hell he did in his spare time.
As you parked in the back lot, you were surprised to see Carmy sneaking through the back door. Your heart began to thud a little faster, it was stupid, but you hadn’t thought you’d be seeing him so soon. You sat there for a moment calming your nerves, you were sure the conversation wouldn’t be brought up while you were working, but maybe Carmy came here looking for you specifically.
You got out of your car, locking it behind you before entering the establishment. Quickly punching your time card before grabbing one of the spare aprons and heading to check in with Mikey.
The dinner rush would be starting soon and since Richie was gone you’d have to balance working the cashier and running food to the diners. You walked around, head popping into the office to let Mikey know you were there.
The two of you crashed into each other as he was making his way to the kitchen, arms shooting out to steady you so you didn’t fall.
“Thanks for coming Baby, but uh if you wanna go home I won’t stop you.” You watched Mikey awkwardly scratch the back of his head, eyes darting around the kitchen as he watched the controlled chaos ensue. Surprise etching your features, not used to Mikey being the awkward Berzatto in your life.
��No, I don’t mind kind of needed to get out of the house anyways,” you smiled at home before heading to the front to take care of the line that was beginning to form.
Most of the orders were for takeout so you hadn’t been rushing back and forth too much. But the Johnsons, an old couple who ate dinner here every Sunday, was your first dine-in order, the two greeting you before heading back to their favorite table.
You turned to the window waiting for the order you had already given, watching as Tina made her way to you apprehensively.
“I can run this for you Mama if you want me to.” You shook your head sending her a smile before taking the two red baskets from her hand and making your way to the dining area, eyes instantly spotting the older couple.
“Two famous Italian beef sandwiches for my favorite regulars,” you smiled down at the couple setting a tray in front of each one respectively.
“Say, honey, isn’t that your little friend over there?” You watched as the woman subtly pointed at another table, you and her partner both taking in the scene in front of you.
You felt a wide smile spreading over your face as you took in Carmy’s figure, the shyness exuding off of him. His lips brandishing a small smile, it took the laughter of his table mate to slap the rose-colored glasses off your face.
So caught up in your infatuation with the boy you’d been crushing on and finally got to kiss the other night, you hardly noticed Claire.
The two women sitting at the table in front of you sharing a knowing look, guilt seeping through as they alerted you to something you’d rather be ignorant to.
“I’m so sorry honey, I didn’t mean to upset you. Mabel been telling me I oughta learn when to shut my big mouth. If I ain’t listen 20 years ago I sure wasn’t gone figure it out by now.” You let out a sad pathetic laugh at Ms. Sadie’s explanation doing your best to compartmentalize your feelings.
“Shame though Baby, that boys missing out on something good. You looked at that boy like he parted the heavens and earth. My Mabel used to look at me like that, you know, the only thing she looks at like that now is cake and these damn beef sandwiches.” Ms. Sadie’s laugh unconsciously draws one of your own, finally taking your attention from Carmy and Claire.
“Oh hush up now Sadie and let the girl get back to work,” another watery laugh escaped your lips. “Talking this sweet girl's ear off like she wants to listen to you on top of watching the boy she loves on a date.”
Your head shot to Ms. Mabel’s slightly taken aback by her word choice, she settled you with a look. “Don’t go giving me that look now. You may be foolin' that boy and yourself but you ain’t foolin' anyone with eyes baby.” You let her reach out to gently pat your hand, the two women in front of you made it hard to keep your calm facade up.
“You gone on and head home Baby, and if Michael has a problem with it you let him know Ms. Mabel and Ms. Sadie said it was okay.” You let out a real laugh, the sound caught the one boy’s attention you didn’t care for right now.
“And tell your momma to stop by if she’s ever feeling up for it,” you sent the couple a small smile nodding your head. “Yes ma’am, you two enjoy the rest of your night.” With that, you began your journey out of the dining room.
You stopped as you heard Claire call out your name, turning inside the doorway as she sent you a wave, returning a small one as you purposefully avoided giving Carmy any attention.
You made your way into the kitchen no one needed to ask what was wrong as they took in your somber mood. You silently slid into the walk-in, maybe it was unsanitary but you didn’t think you could face anyone as you finally let the first sob wrack your body.
The fact that you knew this incident wouldn’t change your friendship with him irritated you to no end. But you cared for him so much that you just couldn’t force yourself to quit him. Maybe this move was what you needed, the time spent apart would allow you to discover who you were outside of Carmen Berzatto. You would do your best to allow the friendship between the two of you to keep flourishing, but whatever Carmy decided was best for him, you’d just have to live with it.
You hadn’t realized how long you were standing in the walk-in until Mikey entered. Body engulfing yours in a hug as his warmth radiated through you. The older Berzatto allowed you to stain his shirt in tears, neither of you saying a word as the sound of your sorrow painted the walk-in.
The youngest Berzatto’s hand stilled on the door handle as he listened to your faint cries. His own heart broke as he realized that he hurt you again. Head hitting against the exterior of the door, he didn’t deserve you, didn’t know if he ever would. Carmy forced himself to listen to your faint sobs wanting to console you at this moment but not knowing where the two of you stood.
Two friends stood on opposite sides of a steel door, hearts breaking in unison as it felt like everything was fighting against what they both wanted. July would come and they would part ways, promises whispered to stay in contact and remain friends, neither soul knowing what the years apart would have in store for them.
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a/n: i apologize if anything in this chapter doesn't make sense or is wonky, i've been editing for 3 days straight and i feel like i can't read english anymore. hope you enjoyed! i also have a whole playlist if anyone is interested!
taglist: @hawkins-2000 @elliesbabygirl @allbark-no-bite @anakinswh0re3005 @rexorangecouny @thecraziestcrayon @fruitcupsworld @nishinoyahhh @lilylovelyxo @ridingthehotmessexpress @noas-ark @jadeittic @hellokittyever @luvr-bunnyy @sxgees @fandomhopped @is-this-a-febreze-commercial @kravitzwhore @chanluuvr @readingwiththereids @chims-kookies @ladygrey03 @ferida-kahlo @wanderlustnightwanderer @how2besalty @armydrcamers @jointherebellion215 @jackierose902109 @blkbxrbie-esther @ajordan2020 @head-slut-in-charge @magnet-girl @thebookwormlife @sevikasblackgf @writers-hes @senassn
unable to tag: @khena @kailyn-g05 @ovaqma @fire-treasure-iii @frequentnosebleeder @gcidrvsh @awatt31 @cauliflowerpatch
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obsessedduh · 15 days
Text
previous part | part two —> here
cw: mentions of blood, gore, stalking, obsession, peverse and creepy reader, yander intendecies! implied fem reader but I tried to make it as gender neutral as possible!
MDNI – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
*✧・゚: *✧・゚
Careless!Simon 'Ghost' Riley who knows yandere!reader is stalking him. he's a military man, he's gonna hear you creep and watch him outside of his window!
simon who knows your the dirty little thief who's been stealing his clothes, mostly boxers. simon who keeps all your stupid notes that you write for him, they're normally weird but sweet in a really, really creepy way.
'si! you looked so pretty in the shower today, played with myself while looking at your pretty cock today! from your secret admirer ♡' you would leave him with a lazy drawing of a heart on his bathroom mirror.
'hey my love, you're finally home...look at the little gift i sent you on your phone!' he cocks an eyebrow, this was different? no, corny heart? no, 'from your secret admirer'? no weird, perverted stuff? just a simple note? that made simon confused, sure - the notes you give him were perverse and weird and should've made anyone who read them feel hella uncomfortable but the fact you didn't write anything odd in this specific note seemed a whole lot more creepy than it normally does.
he shrugs and takes his phone out of his pocket, clicking on the random number notifcation, as per usual, from how many times you've texted him he should really save your number. his eyes widen to see a picture of you, without your usual mask. wait a minute, he remembers you! you're the medic at work.
he couldn't believe it, you!? but your one of the sweetest and innocent people he knows there, in fact maybe even the sweetest. always treating solider's with care. always comforting soliders if they are surfering emotionally or physically. always cheering people up. always having a bright smile on you're no matter how shit the situation is. always putting a smile on people's faces.
he takes a good look at you, sheesh you were so pretty, he's finished staring at your face for a good long while, his eyes shift to the other side of the photo. his eyes shoot wide open again to see you next to a dead body of a blonde woman. a large cut in the middle of her stomach while organs hang out of her. gory much!
he groans out of digust until - wait a minute! he recognises theml? oh yeah, it's the girl from last week, the one who tried to get his number. his wide eyes slowly turn shift back into normal and he smirks and laughs. replying to your messages with:
mylove🤍: Was this out of pure jealously?
you hear a ding in your pocket while trying to dispose of the body. you gasp to see a message from simon, everytime you texted him, he would never reply always leaving you on opened. you were surprised when he actually did reply! you clicked on the notifcation, taking you to your chats. you giggle and immediately you realize how formally he texts, how boring until you finally read it, guess he's just as sane as you.
you: yup
he snickers at your childish reply.
mylove🤍: You gonna do this everytime a girl flirts with me?
you: yup
mylove🤍: Guess I should let girls flirt with me more often then, hm?
your laughed at the text, does he seriously not care that your literally killing people out of pure jealously!? i guess not, he's literally saying he'll let girls flirt with him just so you can slaughter them later.
you: dont tell me u want me to kill more girls for u si?
mylove🤍: Is that not what I've just implied?
you bit your lip at that, your crush is willingly let you kill people for him, it's like your dream come true.
you: i guess ill have continue doing it then
mylove🤍: I guess so.
your heat dropped at the next message he sent you.
mylove🤍: Also did not think you would be the cute medic from work though.
shit!
you forgot to blur out your face...
*✧・゚: *✧・゚
wanna know more about me —> here
masterlist —> here
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anonymousjester · 10 months
Text
You've seen one of my dumbass ideas, now get ready for the second one! Baldi's program, learners initiative! Baldi's school gets new students, all from places which are used to learn certain aspects! mostly kids shows, some disguised as such, All of these characters have their shows/games themed on learning! Dora - spanish Amanda - instructions and wordplay pibby - meaning of words Kai lan - chinese Doi, from DHMIS - a show disguised as a childrens puppet show! Now put in the school of baldi, where he decides to take them in and teach them!
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of course, when there are new students, there are new teachers! Introducing
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Monika, the schools english teacher. She's quite fond of teaching as well as seeing the poems that the kids make in their activities, she absolutely adores when they try their best and is the type to keep their works in her desk for safe keeping. She's also the one who usually keeps baldi at bay, especially in her own class hours.
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BENDY! The art teacher! He's a fun fellow that often teleports around the school using his ink abilities! He's often seen roaming the area, never being in one place for too long, even when hes teaching! He brings the kids outside to let their creativity flow freely as his activities usually make them play or draw whatever they wish! Theres no limits to creation after all!! Thats what he believes atleast.
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Baldi isnt a new teacher, of course not, but he is the new headmaster. Apparently, this school was entirely new, even for him. None of those from his world followed him to this new place as he just suddenly woke up in the school.. so he decided that he would be the one to take the role as headmaster, as well as of course the math teacher, who would he be if he wasnt? He still has his temper, but he actually has the restraint given by other teachers stopping him from going too far..maybe thats exactly what he needed.
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Gaster! the science teacher, one if not the most responsible of the bunch. He's very patient and understanding with the kids, after all most of them arent in the age to learn what he knows, and hes rather fond of them. The students are more open with gaster than with anyone else, as somehow he feels the safest out of all of them. They dont know why, he just emits this parental aura around him. They arent afraid to ask him about things they dont understand, and he'll continuously teach until they do ill definitely make more content of this, i do have a bunch of ideas for this silly crossover, hehe!
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sayafics · 7 months
Text
Dance of Shadows - Chapter II
Thank you to everyone who showed so much love to Chapter I and waited so patiently for this chapter! I do hope you enjoy it. Reading all your comments and seeing your likes and reblogs made me feel so appreciated, so thank you again!
This chapter will be very Daemon/Saenyra focused, but please presume everything else happens as normal <3
This is quite a long chapter, but I hope it's worth the read!
Next Chapter
Previous Chapter
Masterlist
The crowd roared in unison, a crashing wave of victory and excitement rolled through the tourney grounds as the people of King's Landing yelled in celebration - the tourney has begun, and so has Queen Aemma's labours.
Saenyra's father held the tourney in honour of her maybe-brother that was itching and turning to leave her mother's womb.
She wanted to be by her mother's side, to hold her hand, and ground her during the pains of bearing a child.
But Viserys had promised the girl Aemma would be fine, that it was of more importance she was to attend the tourney. As that was where her duty required her to be - an ornament, a prize placed at the forefront of a bloodied battle for men to lust for, soldiers to grovel for, and Lords to prepare bounties in exchange for.
Of course he had not said so directly to her, even his words, so gentle and kind, were not her's to listen to. Yet they were a silent command to follow.
Viserys had spoken the words to Rhaenyra, Saenyra had simply been there and nodded like the obedient child she was and obeyed an order they did not feel the need to grace her with.
In the back of her mind, Saenyra knew if her absence did not draw up the suspicions and whispers of the people, then her father would have paid no mind. Rhaenyra is heir, if not to the throne, then to Dragonstone.
She was simply a princess, with no power tied to her name nor land for her to cherish. All that came to her - all that would be her own, would first belong to the man her father asked her to marry. And, some nights, Saenyra feared she would not be able to deny her father's wishes, because she had always seen her father's words to her as they truly were - commands of a King, not the gentle whispers of a loving father.
The tourney had begun, and Saenyra sat next to her sister as she gazed upon the grounds, suppressing a flinch as she watched the men collide into each other with a violent crack. The sound was enough to snap her out of her reverie, realising she had already missed the introductions and did not know who was competing. She sat straighter, spine stiffening as she rolled her shoulders - it would not be good if the Lords and Ladies were to catch her ill-attention, cursing it as a lack of manners and a mockery to the Court.
She paid no mind to Alicent's and Rhaenyra's incessant whispers, knowing their words were not for her and to include herself would only lead to them drawing back until she stopped. So she sat, quiet and proper, eyes flitting over the game in front of her in feigned interest.
The man who had fallen was Ser Gwayne Hightower of Old Town, Alicent's brother. Saenyra remembers him well, recalls the whispers that Otto Hightower had proposed a marriage between his eldest son and one of Viserys' daughters, but it was Aemma who denied the match. She did not think it a coincidence when she had ran into the man the following evening in the library, and she was bound in suspicion when he offered to walk her back to her chambers.
To this day, Saenyra finds herself grateful that Ser Harwin Strong had found her in those moments, and she was gladdened to hear him offer to escort her back in his stead. Ser Harwin was a dangerous man, but he was also loyal to the crown and would do her no harm.
Ser Gwayne Hightower was his father's child, and Saenyra, despite all her years sharing the castle with him, had never known Otto Hightower enough to trust him.
She watched how Alicent held her breath as the armoured man knocked Gawyne off his horse with brutal ease. Ser Hightower conceded, and the man dressed in an armour of dark grey and riddled with red as dark as rubies cheered in victory.
Saenyra's eyes traced over the armoured man, following every curve and line that decorated the fine metal-work. She noticed him draw closer, and at his proximity Rhaenyra leapt up from her seat.
Rhaenyra exuded a familiar scent of childish glee at the sight of the man, and it was only then that realisation sunk in as gentle lavendar hues met the molten colour of vicious violet.
This was Daemon, dressed in armour fit for a dragon, so unlike the one she had seen him only before. He stood now, clean and shining. His eyes were bright, glowing with the fire of a new battle, his expression seemed eased, and Saenyra knew the tourney was nothing like the bloodbaths Daemon loved to seek.
"Nicely done, Uncle."
Daemon's eyes flitted to Rhaenyra, squinting against the sun as a pleased smile crossed his face. Saenyra couldn't help the jealousy that festered under her skin, to see her sister once again preen under the attention of their uncle who seemed to care for one sister more than the other - just like her father, just like her mother, just like the Kingdom and probably, just like her brother too.
"Thank you, Princess."
Daemon's words were spoken with a lilt, and any passerby would have assumed the man was enamoured by the girl who stood in front of him - the Realm's Delight.
Instead, his eyes bounced from Rhaenyra to her friend standing loyally beside her, and his mouth parted, ready to ask a question.
It was at that moment a glint caught Daemon's eye, and his eyes darted back to the quiet girl who sat in the shadows of her sister's tall and domineering presence. It was at that moment he remembered a call for a promise and a whisper to wait until the time came to be.
Daemon could have used such a promise to bargain some leverage, to gain the upper hand, and receive power or triumph in turn. But, eyes roving over the girl who avidly avoided his boring stare, he found he did not want to wait and see if a different opportunity arises. Not when he could live in a whispered moment of his desires right now.
"Now I am fairly certain I can win these games, Lady Alicent," Daemon watched how Rhaenyra's face fell as he addressed her friend instead of her, knowing what question lay on the tip of his tongue, and for a moment Daemon truly felt pity for the girl. "But having the favour of one so kind and gentle would all but assure it," he watched Alicent radiate a warmth of eagerness at his words, despite her attempts to stifle it in Rhaenyra's presence.
As a man who abhorred the existence of her father and his twisted words, Daemon could not help the thrill that wracked through him as he continued his words and watched the Hightower girl deflate.
"Would you send for my dearest niece? I have a question for her."
Alicent looked between Rhaenyra and her sister, pulling herself together as she deliberated her next course of action. Daemon raised a brow, and she nodded hesitantly in reply. She stepped backwards - once, twice. As though she was waiting for Rhaenyra to stop her - she never did. So Alicent turned on her heels and walked ever so slowly towards Saenyra who determinedly looked towards her fumbling fingers and avoided the eyes of her sister's friend, dread settling in the pit of her stomach at the sound of the approaching figure.
"Princess, your uncle calls to you."
Saenyra looked up with a frown, "what does my uncle want with me?"
Alicent looked over her shoulders for a moment, glacing at Rhaenyra's tense shoulders and Daemon's narrowed eyes - "I believe it is something you must ask him."
Saenyra regarded her with suspicion, eyes flitting over to see her uncle and sister locked in a bout of seething words. She found she did not want to approach, worried of what she may hear and what she may be asked.
Did Daemon want to ask for his favour now? Was it truly to do with Rhaenyra? Was that why she was so angry? Did Rhaenyra not want her to overhear what Daemon plans to ask of her?
Despite all the questions echoing in her mind like a deafening storm, she finds herself standing in a graceful manner and making her way to them with Alicent lurking a step or two behind.
When they approached the pair, Daemon and Rhaenyra were sharing a gaze heated by the fire of dragons - Rhaenyra glared at the man as though they had shared venomous words, despite them not being overheard by others.
Saenyra waited a few steps back, hesitance clouding her mind as she waited - hoping Daemon would call to her.
And he did.
"Saenyra," her name sounded so sweet, rolling off his tongue, his anger that flowed in steaming waves now seemed to lull in the air of her presence. "I have something to ask of you," a knowing look crossed his face, a sign that he was referring to their meeting by chance a few short days ago, and it was as though he knew she had not forgotten about it either.
Saenyra glanced towards her sister, but Rhaenyra simply avoided her gaze and stood with a passive expression painted along her face. Saenyra cleared her throat, her voice almost a whisper as she spoke, unsure of what to say, "of course, Uncle. What is it that you desire?"
She had stumbled over her words, cringing as she spoke faster than her mind had been able to think. But Daemon paid no mind, though his lip quirked with amusement as he thought of asking for her, then and there.
Alas, he knew he could do no such thing. So he commanded, an air of reverence in his words, "give me your favour."
His words were simple, so close to the words he truly wanted to say, but knew he could not with his brother's watchful eyes upon him.
Saenyra's cheeks heated at his words, but she did not miss how Rhaenyra's fingers tightened upon the railing, nor how her jaw twitched as she clenched it in irritation.
She almost said no, a part of her even wanted to - fearful of hurting her sister's feelings and possibly losing her in some way. But there was a selfish part of Saenyra, so young and wanting, that had craved for a moment such as this, where someone would ask for her in place of her sister. And she would truly be mad to deny this moment, regardless of how fleeting it came to be.
She bit her lip in feigned contemplation, and Daemon found himself growing warm in the confines of his armour at the sight. She glanced back at Daemon, unable to stop the teasing smile slipping onto her face as she leaned towards him over the railing - "only if you say please."
A flare of pure, unadulterated want radiated through Daemon at her words, and he found himself leaning towards her without a care for the watchful eyes of his audience - "please."
Despite all his savage glory, his plea was close to a whimper, and it seemed to ignite something in Saenyra he had never seen before. Her eyes glance to his lips before moving back, she pulled herself back with heated cheeks and laboured breaths as she clears her throat.
Saenyra turned to grab her wreath, only to find Rhaenyra stood infront of her with it in her grasp.
She stared at her sister for a few moments, unsure of what to do. It seemed even her father was not sure if he should intervene, and Otto simply watched with an interested gaze.
Rhaenyra held the wreath tight, her unrelenting grip causing the flowers beneath to crumble and give in. Saenyra glances back to Daemon's waiting figure, a shroud of determination settles in her as she regards Rhaenyra again, taking slow steps towards her before holding the wreath firmly and taking it from her grasp, she spares her sister a stiff nod - "thank you, Sister."
Rhaenyra doesn't move, nor acknowledge her. She simply waits to see if Saenyra would truly go ahead with this, and give Daemon what he seeks.
Saenyra walks towards Daemon, her steps much more sure and confident. She leans over the railing and gives him a shy smile. He returns it with his own - a broad and mischievous grin.
She reaches towards him to place the wreath, and just as the flowers brush the tip of his sword, he cants his horse to step back away from her as a glorious laugh escapes him. Saenyra can't help the way her heart flutters at the sound, but she rolls her eyes all the same - "Uncle."
Her words were drawn out in feigned annoyance, and he pulled himself back closer at the sound, waiting for her to reach out again before moving away.
"Ugh, Uncle. I swear to the Seven, I will simply take my seat again, and you can fight without my favour."
Daemon tuts, "we can not have that now, can we? Perhaps to make it easier, you can come onto the grounds?"
He raises his brow in challenge, so sure she would not heed. But a look over her shoulder, into the eyes of her raging sister, was all it took for her to move towards the stairs and duck under the arms of a cautious guard.
She ignored the calls of her father and his Hand, the indignant call of Rhaenyra and her friend. She stepped onto the grounds with a huffed breath, but her lips were stretched into a traiterous smile as she walked towards Daemon, who met her halfway.
Daemon unmounted his horse, leaving his joust on the ground as he moved towards her in slow, deliberate steps. He paid no mind to the baited silence of their audience nor the exasperated calls of the Court. He stood in front of her, his armoured boots brushing against the billowing skirt of her dress - a pale pink that stood brightly against the sun.
Saenyra held the wreath out towards him, a simple ring of flowers decorated in shades of blues and yellows - her favourite flowers, irises and begonias, formed into a colourful cluster.
Daemon reached out to accept it. His fingers, encased in his harsh and cold armoured gloves, brushed slowly over the petals to then skim the skin of her warm and delicate hands. Saenyra shivered, goose-flesh running up her arms as she repressed the tremble that silently wracked through her body. His touch paused as metal met metal, and his armoured fingers glided against a ring made of familiar steel.
A ring, so dark and grand, sat on the Princess' hand in place of where her future bethrothed's would. And it was made of Valyrian steel, a shared piece of ancestry.
Daemon admired how the ring looked upon her finger, how the blood-soaked jewel hammered into it radiated against her skin as though it was proud of its wearer and yearned to be showcased because of it.
A shared piece of him.
***
Daemon had avoided Saenyra after his trysts in Silk Street, unable to meet her eye or hear her voice without his mind flashing back to his escapade with Myseria, where all he could think about was Saenyra.
The lengths he would have gone to have her, or someone that simply looked like her.
His stomach would roll with nausea, and his mind was heavy with questions. He found himself needing to apologise with no true need except for the guilt that plagued his mind due to his traiterous fanatasies.
The night after his venture with Myseria, he found himself lazing away in his chambers as the sun fell into the arms of the night sky and the moon rose in its place.
Daemon found himself staring up at the ceiling, eyes tracing over every animate shadow and ears on alert for every step and whisper that sounded at his doors.
His heart beat at a calm pace, but every thud brought a sinking feeling of unease to settle in the confines of his chest. His mind began to wander, his thoughts flitting between images of his night with Myseria, to his gift to Rhaenyra, to walking into his little niece.
Daemon remembers how he struggled to force his gaze away from her bare neck - a princess of a Kingdom so grand and powerful, and yet her father would rather have the girl dressed as a commoner than royalty.
Daemon scoffed at the thought - oh, how he wanted to adorn her in jewels and diamonds, to weigh her heavy in the best of refineries so others would see just how much her beauty was worth. How much she is worth.
But he had already given Rhaenyra a necklace, and he wasn't blind to Saenyra's stares of sadness and envy. He knew to give her the same gift he gave Rhaenyra would be nothing short of an insult.
He would do no such thing.
He closed his eyes in frustration, his racing thoughts barely allowing him to catch a breath long enough to lull himself to sleep. He sat up stiffly, throwing his legs over the edge of the bed as he held his head in his hands.
A deep sigh escaped him, thumbs digging into his eyes as though he was forcing away the images of Saenyra - trying to forget her moonlit hair, her pale eyes, her murmured words and her hesitant breaths.
Daemon glanced towards the fireplace that now burned low, the heat had dampened down, and a cold chill filled the air. It was a feeling akin to flying Caraxes in the winter sky, a scathing feeling that somehow brought a warmth to him all the same.
His eyes rested upon his sword, which stood defiantly against the hearth. Dark Sister looked almost black in the shadows of a dying fire, the rain-guard glinting a violent gold against the blade.
Rhaenyra's necklace had been a piece of shared ancestry.
But Saenyra deserved something more. For all she had done to be a dutiful daughter, she had not shared the grace of being a true dragon despite the blood of one burning through her veins.
When she was younger, a hopeful child who was so sure her egg would hatch as she aged, Daemon had pitied the girl. Even now, his heart would clench in sympathy for her. But he could see how such a loss of an opportunity had strengthened her.
She was just as much of a dragon as he was, despite never having one to call her own. She was just not able to see it yet.
Daemon saw a fragment of his soul in hers. The part of him that yearned for his father's approval, his brother's love. The fraction of him who had ached and begged for a dragon before he made it his mission to tame his own.
Daemon had called for a blacksmith the next day before daylight had broken and offered a pouch of Gold Dragon coins with one hand and his Dark Sister with the other.
Daemon knew exactly what his sweet girl deserved - what she needed.
Saenyra was a dragon, through and through - she simply needed a reminder of such.
The blacksmith had returned before dark, standing nervously with trembling hands as he offered Daemon his sword with one hand and held forth a cotton bag in the other.
Daemon glanced over his sword, his eyes easily catching the part that did not belong. The pommel was the same gold as his rain-guard, but it seemed dainty in comparison. He longed to hold his sword and test it for deficiencies, but his eyes caught the ivory bag clenched tightly in the hands of the blacksmith.
Daemon laid out his hand, and the bag was placed upon it with hesitance. Daemon rolled his eyes at the man's slow movements and snatched the bag away, pulling the ties open and tipping its contents into the palm of his hand.
A bejewelled piece of metal fell with a light thump. The metal felt familiar, even though it had been melted and twisted into something he did not recognise.
The band was simple, engraved with vines and flowers that were so quaint yet so detailed. And fitted perfectly in its centre sat a timid, glowing jewel likened to a pool of congealed blood.
Daemon thought back to the necklace he gifted to Rhaenyra, how its jewels were a bright and lively red. A mockery of who Daemon pretended to be.
This jewel, this colour, this steel. It was a part of him - a reflection of who he was. It was admiration and bloodshed and protection all in one. It was a silent promise and a vicious outcry.
It was a gift, fit for a princess. Fit for Saenyra.
Daemon reached for his sword, turning it over to have a look at the pommel of his sword where Valyrian Steel had been replaced by something else - it was a worthwhile sacrifice, he thought. His hands fisted around the ring, relishing in the feel of it imprinting against his skin.
Daemon had walked through the Keep with the ring settled in the pocket of his chemise for days now, unable to bear the courage to face her in fear of what his desires may ask of him.
It was not until the day of the tourney that he found himself in front of the youngest Princess' chambers. He nodded in greeting to her guards, not waiting for them to announce his presence before he marched into her chambers - he could not risk allowing hesitance to cloud his decisions and walk away.
Daemon held his breath as he closed the doors behind him. Saenyra sat at her dresser, combing through her hair before the sound of Daemon's loud entry forced her eyes to meet his in the reflection.
She was still dressed in her sleeping gown, a sheer shade of pearl that hugged against her figure. Daemon roved his eyes over her by instinct, hungrily drinking in the sight of her whilst he could. Saenyra was not blind to his devouring stare, clearing her throat despite her skin flushing under his heated gaze - "Uncle, can I help you?"
Daemon's eyes met hers, and the desire that pooled in them began to wane as he pulled himself together into the semblance of a gentleman.
"Saenyra," there it was again, her name passing through his soft lips with a gentle caress, "I have something for you."
She raised a brow in question, turning to look over her shoulder at him instead, "and what would that be?"
Daemon did not speak further, he walked closer towards her before stopping at the foot of her bed. He sat cautiously, waiting to see if she would object and send him away, but the girl was much too curious to do such a thing.
He beckoned her forward, and she hesitated for a moment.
"Come."
His voice was firm, as though he knew she would obey without question, and as she stumbled to her feet, she had the fleeting realisation that she would do anything Daemon had asked. She would follow him to the ends of the world and more, if he so desired.
She stood in front of him, and still she felt so small despite the fact that he had to look up to her. Her hands fiddled with the ends of her gown, which brushed against her thighs lightly - the idea she was so exposed in front of her uncle sent a shiver down her spine.
Daemon forced himself to keep his eyes upon hers, to not disrespect his darling niece when she had so politely adhered to his wishes despite the burning temptation to drink in the sight of her bare legs only a hairs-breadth away.
If he leaned forward, he was sure he could run his lips against her bare skin, and his body heated at the thought of her trembling under his touch.
He shook himself from his thoughts, looking upon Saenyra with adoring eyes as one of his hands took hers. He tugged her gently, tempted to pull her onto his lap but knowing it was a move much too daring.
Instead, she fell neatly onto her knees between his parted legs, and Daemon had to hold back a groan. She eyed him with such trust, full of so much naivety and innocence he found himself intoxicated with the idea of corrupting her and taking her as his own.
But he couldn't.
Shouldn't.
"I have a gift for you."
His words were a gasped whisper, spoken only between their shared breath that she had almost missed it, becoming so distracted by his warmth - by his dragon fire.
She blinked slowly, as though she was confused, "for me?"
He smiled at her, kindly. Something so unlike Daemon that even he was struck with the oddity of their circumstances. Still, he nodded.
She frowned, "why?"
His head tilted in sympathy to see his niece so surprised by such an act - "why not? Anything for my favourite niece."
Her eyes widened in surprise, "I'm your favourite?"
He grinned, "who else could it possibly be?"
Her head became down-turned, "everyone knows you love Rhaenyra more."
Her words struck a cord in his heart, is that what she truly believed? "And yet it is you I brought a gift for."
She looked back up at him, her face dead-pan as she spoke, "that is because you already brought her one. This is probably something gifted out of guilt."
She was close to the truth, but not entirely. This was a gift out of guilt for his wreckless thoughts and violent desires, but it was also a token of his devotion. Not that his dear niece needed to know.
He shook his head in turn, "this is so much more."
His hand reached into the pocket of his chest, nimble fingers pulling out the jewel he held so close to his heart as he waited for this moment. Her lips parted at the sight of it, and Daemon was sure he saw unshed tears pool within her eyes.
"That's for me?"
"Just for you."
Her eyes flickered to meet his disbelief, painting her expression - "Daemon," she spoke his name as though it was natural to her, and it sang with melodic delight causing desire to curl in his chest and hum contentedly. "Daemon," she repeated, so sweetly and softly, "I can't accept this."
"Yes you can."
"It is too much. It would not be fair to accept such a prize with nothing given in return."
Mischief raided through his heart as though it was a second nature, it clashed with desire and became pronounced - "then take it in exchange for another promise. A bigger one," his voice dipped, lowering into a whisper, "a dangerous one."
Saenyra didn't let her gaze fall from his, she knew she should deny him and his gift. She should send him from her chambers and pretend nothing had happened, but to have him so close and to see him act so daring, to challenge her so openly - it sparked a burning fire within her, setting her dragon alight - "so, what is it that you want?"
Her words felt like an echo of the ones she had said to him only days ago.
"I guess you shall have to wait and see."
She couldn't help the shy smile that slipped across her face at his echoing words, nor the heated flush that painted her cheeks as she felt him take her hand and slip the ring onto her left hand. It sat snugly on the finger where her future bethrothed's ring would have sat. And a small part of Saenyra, the one so selfish and greedy, knew no other man would have been able to produce a perfect fit for her apart from Daemon.
Saenyra couldn't pull her eyes away from his, she watched as his eyes darkened under her curious gaze. His own glanced towards her lips that she bit anxiously, and a thumb came to brush across it softly as he pulled it out before she could abuse it further.
His thumb sat on the bed of her lip, and he kept her gaze with a new ferocity. She glanced to his now, watching how he wetted his lips under her watchful gaze as his head grew heady with desire.
A knock on the door, loud and harsh, startled her from his grasp. His hand was still outstretched towards her, and his eyes never left her, even as she stood and brushed the gown straight.
Ser Harwin entered the room, a curious gaze passed between the unusual pair, before he focused upon the simmering figure of Daemon Targaryen- "my Prince, the King calls for you. The tourney is to begin."
Daemon lets out a frustrated sigh as he pulls himself to his feet, he walks towards Saenyra and pulls her focus back onto him. He holds the hand bejewelled with a piece of him and presses a longing kiss upon her knuckles - "I hope to see you on the grounds, Saenyra."
She did not get a chance to reply. He turned on his feet and walked out her chambers - not without sharing a sharp glare with Ser Harwin Strong.
After he had left, Saenyra shared a nervous smile with Ser Harwin before he prompted her to get ready as he would send the handmaids to help her. She nodded in agreement, returning to her dresser to brush through her hair, but throughout it all, she was unable to tear away her gaze from the fine ring that adorned her hand.
A flutter sang within her chest, and a traiterous smile and bubbling laugh escaped her as she thought of Daemon's glimmering eyes and bright smile.
***
Daemon had been knocked onto the grounds by Ser Criston Cole, the man was skilled in tourneys but Daemon was better - more experienced.
He launched from the grounds, demanding his sword before slashing and swinging against Criston's flail. He sent a frenzied attack that was oragnised yet doused with the fire of unbridled rage.
He admired the man's strength and his stubbornness, but Daemon was not one to lose.
He had knocked Criston to the ground, Daemon's shield had been shattered to splinters, but he swung his sword with ease, his golden pommel a shining beacon for the girl who owned the original piece.
He turned towards the audience, towards her - cheering and celebrating. He searched for the missing part of his sword in the victorious cries of the Court, in their waving arms and broad smiles. His sword usually felt light in his hand, as though it was an extension of him, but the longer he struggled to seek her out, the heavier it felt.
She had left the tourney before he had even succeeded, she had not waited to celebrate his victory, she had not shared a parting goodbye or stayed for a boisterous celebration.
And with her, she had taken her favour.
Daemon had let his guard down, and Criston had taken advantage of his wavering heart and beat him to the ground whilst his back was turned - the act of a coward, but the rise of a victor.
Daemon yielded.
His eyes closed in frustration as his mind flooded with flashes of her once more - why had she left?
***
Within the walls of the Keep, Queen Aemma's cries sounded loudly. Saenyra had wanted to comfort her mother, but they tore her apart before she could reach her.
They let her mother cry and scream and beg until her last dying breath. And the babe followed shortly after.
Perhaps her mother did not care for her as much as she did Rhaenyra, but Aemma was her mother.
Perhaps the babe would have preferred his eldest sister, the dragon-rider, to his other sister, the timid. But Baelon was her brother.
She had gained the affection of her uncle, but lost her mother and her brother as consequence.
Saenyra felt as though her body revolted in the shadows of a dark and humourous curse, one that took and took and gave so little.
Saenyra stared at the ring Daemon placed upon her finger, her eyes were blank and her face was streaked with tears, her breaths were coming out short and panicked and she tried her best to avoid her mother's gasping breaths, her pleas for a daughter who was absent and not the one who was present, her last tear and her father's wails.
She stared at the ring, and a piece of her - the growing envious beast within - wished she had never accepted the token, believing if she did not, she would still have the half-love of a mother and the possible love of a brother, in place of a displaced infatuation of an uncle.
She wanted Daemon, but she was not sure how.
She wanted Daemon, but she wanted her mother more.
I honestly loved writing this chapter, it was like the words just flowed. I really do hope you guys like it! Please comment, like, and reblog! Every single one is so greatly appreciated <33
I have so many ideas for the next few chapters, I can't wait!!
Taglist: @marihoneywk @ahristata @gracielikegrapes @luanasrta @pet1t3
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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months
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hello! Im one(1) of the anons that requested the jane doe reader and i thought of a funny scenario
So the character of jane doe was basically decapitaded so, imagine if reader's head isnt atached to their body, and can take their head off .
The tadc cast react to the reader taking off their head and then putting It back on like nothing. Tyy!!!
( remember to rest and drink wáter) :)
TADC cast x a reader with a detachable head!
oh hoho this one is going to be fun because my TADC oc can do the same thing, can take their limbs and head off at will and as needed; so i may or may not let my excitement show in this post and use my oc as a placeholder.. i definitely will.. which reminds me, i have a sketch of my ocs human design as well as a messy ref of their digital body... i have got to draw them more.. maybe ill finish the human sketch sometime today after this post... speaking of this post! this is the last request in my inbox ! after this im gonna take a break for a bit then reopen requests! do not send in requests at this time, please! (this goes for everyone regardless of fandom </3)
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CAINE:
technically i think you could consider him with a detachable head... because i dont... think he has a neck... so technically.. not phased at all, he has seen things from various different circus members.. but lets say you came before zooble, and you were also the first circus member who could do that... i think he would be really into it and be amused. probably flies right up to you chattering about that little trick of yours
POMNI:
uncomfy by it, i think it would take her a while to get used to it... i think she would be the same with zooble thanks to the "these are people" thing, with the only reason she didnt freak out at zoobles dismemberment in the pilot being because she was preoccupied with her panic and confusion of this new setting
RAGATHA:
mildly uncomfortable anytime it happens but no where near as uncomfortable as pomni, since she has had her time to get used to a bunch of weird stuff in the circus; both from the circus itself as well as the people in it.. will guide your body to your head if theres ever a scenario where the two get separated.. hand holding... smiles
JAX:
probably tries to convince you to leave your head in someones room or in a box and have some poor unsuspecting person open it.. i think that would scare anyone, even if they were used to your headless activities... probably laughs at your body wandering aimlessly trying to find your head if theres an occasion where it was forcefully knocked off.. probably nudges your head away... this only really works if your body has to blindly fumble and you having to telepathically guide it towards you instead of it just going into autopilot and knowing where you are automatically and has zero struggle beelining for the head... but fumbling... funny
KINGER:
owoo!! jumpscare!/ref
honestly i think sometimes he just rolls with it and other times hes bothered by it; really depends on how hes feeling that day... but i think the majority is that hes used to it thanks to zooble... has probably run off with your head on accident when he meant to run off with you as a whole, usually in the face of danger during an IHA...
ZOOBLE:
completely unphased by it since they can pretty much do the same thing! there isnt really much to be said since zooble neither feels this way or that in regards to your little decapitation trick... if they couldnt mess with their own parts though i think they would find your thing cool, though
GANGLE:
depending on what your digital body is themed around i think this would determine how gangle would feel about it... like zooble is mismatched and is seen taking out their antennae as well as their limbs being snagged off by jax... with zooble, is makes sense, they look like a mismatched mess of different parts.. so if you were something that could reasonably do the same thing i think she can overlook it... now the first time would still be a shock, no doubt about it, regardless of theme.. very careful whenever theres a reason they need to get close to your head, she does not wanna knock it off and potentially upset you
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9w1ft · 14 days
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I'm a gaylor myself so this isn't coming from a place of hate but I really don't think karlie and taylor are still together, I think taylor still references her in her art and probably will for quite some time because that relationship -- whatever the nature of it was -- left such a deep impact on her. but I really can't see them still being together, I think she's forced herself to move on from karlie and has since dated a lot of other women. that doesn't mean her feelings for karlie have faded, just that they will probably always be there but they broke up for sure before 2019, I think. folklore and evermore, midnights even, are all breakup albums, I just can't see how they could still be together. especially all her anger and sadness in those songs that are thought of to be for karlie (like my tears ricochet or exile or mad woman) also the cover art being shoot in bedfords, new york, the exact same place where karlie got married feels more like taylor revisiting this place to really say goodbye and mourn her for one last final time so she can move on
sorry, this got a bit long, I just don't understand the appeal or the reasoning for lsk's because taylor has indicated so many times that they are over, she's been mourning her relationship with karlie quite publicly since 2019 (wearing all black during the lover era) so yeah
hi! i don’t usually respond to these but i’m not sensing any ill will so i’ve decided to give a reply a go.
first off, for me, i kinda just interpret her wearing black in the back end of lover era because her masters had gotten bought by scooter. and maybe the fact that she decided to not come out. there can be other reasons, but i really do not think that her breaking up with karlie has to be one of them.
another thing i can’t shake is the fact that it was a very notorious troll/manipulative person on tumblr who spread the first rumor that they broke up in 2019, a fact that is well understood by a lot of OG’s, and this troll got in the head of a few popular kaylor and gaylor swift accounts at the time and in doing so she got a lot of people to fold. she then went on to write all this progressively unhinged fanfiction about taylor and karlie trying to make one another jealous and sleeping with all these women, presented with the same level of seriousness with which she pushed the breakup agenda. even to this day, i see present day gaylors talk about stuff that stems from narratives this account and a few other power hungry accounts spread around many years ago and it honestly just goes to show how a lot of well known gaylors may be platformmed up but that don’t really know what they’re talking about.. i only write this because the troll deactivated about a year ago (maybe they’re lurking on platforms with more malleable minds—once a troll always a troll—but at least they’ve left here), they were a really dangerous person.. and several have wild receipts to prove it.
anyways sorry i recognize that’s a tangent, i guess what i mean to say by it is, a lot of the sentiment surrounding the idea of a 2019 breakup and the reinforcement of the narrative by a gaylor community none the wiser stems from the work of someone with disingenuous intentions. a lot of “masterposts” or “realistic timelines” draw from what this person made up and it’s gone through enough filters for it to seem like credible sentiment but like, if you were there and you read all of what she wrote you know how silly it all sounded and how incoherently it was all written.
okay so to circle back to more of a content-centric angle, in my interpretation of the events that gave us folklore, evermore, and midnights, taylor had so much to be sad about. her mom had been very sick, the pandemic arrived and she had to cancel lover fest, she had to come to terms with scott b having sold her work to her sworn enemy… songs on midnights and folklore, and on her lover era apple music playlist allude to certain other things that may have had her in a mournful mood. things were bad! and i don’t doubt that her and karlie have been through a lot. but for me, when you’ve got a ride or die love, you don’t just break up. this has been something frustrating for me and others, i think, to see so many people treat a relationship as either being all systems go or broken up, as if long term partners can’t experience sadness together, difficulty together, even heartbreak together.
i don’t like getting in to touchy subjects so much but there’s just been too much pointing towards what i consider to be a rather simple narrative that is a natural progression for people committed and in love. how did the lover music video begin and end? whats a randomly specific word in a song she performed at the grammys minutes after someone was announced to the world? what about taylor’s envisioned future stands out about the anti hero music video? i think i’ll stop here but idk man 😆 poke around my archive if you feel like wasting a few days of your life… there’s just been a consistent flow of the same kind of hijinks that we’ve seen from them for years, and i’d say that there are many songs that back up everything i’d want in order to stay invested in seeing if what i believe is true.
now, i know i just wrote what reads like a bunch of mumbo jumbo to people not following kaylor. but im okay with that. i’ve accepted that. and i know that the whole patterns and koincidences and twinning and symbolism beat isn’t for everyone and so i respect people’s decisions to believe they aren’t together, but in closing i’ll just say im sometimes at a loss to see time and time again people suggest that kaylors believe in kaylor because they find it appealing or because they want to ship it. when it’s literally not that— it just makes the most sense to a lot of us!
also, does this look like the face of someone mourning?
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echo-bleu · 5 months
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Disability pride request? Two characters of your choice hanging out, maybe one using two forearm crutches and one using two canes. They can be friends or partners - I just generally love seeing disabled characters interactng with one another!
How about three disabled characters?
Once upon a time @camille-lachenille sent me a prompt about Míriel having Ehler-Danlos Syndrome. I had already sketched a disabled Celegorm with EDS in mind and, thinking about how it's genetic, had an epiphany about Celebrimbor (and the meaning of his name) and I drew him as well. So I wrote a fic about all three of them dealing with chronic pain, but I still hadn't drawn Míriel. That oversight is now fixed!
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They have more in common than just chronic illness xD.
This is still titled "The EDS gang" in my files, I'm going to stick to it. Set sometime in Fourth Age Valinor, when most things are good again...
Disabled Tolkien characters series
(Feel free to send me more disability prompts! I love drawing them.)
More ramblings about disability aids that devolved into bullet-point headcanons under the cut. ID and transcription at the end, but they're also in alt text.
[CW: this is all fairly light but discussion of death and trauma and you know, everything that comes with these three.]
I do not know how to make comics. I'm sure that's very obvious but, you know, learning new things and all that. One thing I learned was that my usual style of rendering does not work with it as well so I rendered them entirely twice.
It was meant to be day 21 and 22 of my October challenge, because surely I can draw and colour a full page in a day (spoilers: no). In the end it was a combined 15 hours of work over 3 and a half days because I made it as complicated as I possibly could 😭 Still, I had fun and learned a lot.
Note: Ehlers-Danlos syndrome is a connective tissue disorder, affecting basically how your cells are glued together. There are a lot of different symptoms (and different types of EDS) but a frequent one is joint pain and hypermobility, and it's at least partly inherited.
Míriel:
Red was Míriel's colour first. She's not into gaudy things and rarely wears vivid colours, but almost always something red. She barely wears any jewellery since reembodiment, mostly for sensory reason (She is very autistic. That's something she gave Fëanor, Curufin, Caranthir, Ambarussa and Celebrimbor, at least.)
She died of post-partum (and general) depression and energy depletion from childbirth or something, but the chronic illness that was taking all of her energy and keeping her from her craft certainly didn't help.
Also pregnancy was horribly rough on her, partly because EDS can be affected by hormonal changes.
She's actually been better since reembodiment, because she has better accommodations (Finwë did his best but he was very lost) and also a Vala on hand who makes her very good painkilling tea.
She wears knitted compression gloves that she designed to help with hand pains.
Her wheelchair is of Noldor make, but I'm sure Celebrimbor will have suggestions for improving it.
The tapestry that she is weaving is actually this painting of Finrod that I did a while ago. I figure that she's representing calmer, nicer things now that she doesn't have to weave her grandchildren's downfall and deaths.
Celegorm:
He was in a relationship with Oromë before the Exile. After his reembodiment, it took them a while by they talked it out and forgave each other. Oromë doesn't quite get elves, but he's really supportive.
He has a pair of wolf-head canes carved by Nerdanel. He alternatively uses both, just one and sometimes none depending on activity/pain level.
He wears bandages as compression garments because this is a world without elastane. His leggings have reinforced knees for support.
He's always heard about Míriel having the same thing as he does from Finwë, and he knew that when he started showing symptoms, Fëanor was terrified that he'd fade too. So for a long time, Míriel's story was kind of hanging above his head.
That's why it takes him a while to go seek her out after he's reembodied. Celebrimbor understands why it's important to him and he pushed him to it a little bit, so Celegorm dragged him along.
They're going to get along great. Míriel is both the quintessential grandmother and also she has a twisted sense of humour that Celegorm will just love.
Celebrimbor:
Celegorm was always his favourite uncle, and they became very close when Celebrimbor started having symptoms in the early years in Exile, and Celegorm stayed with Curufin in Himlad for him.
It took Celebrimbor a while to forgive him after Returning (not as long as Curufin but still) but they've gone back to being really close.
He was really unlucky with reembodiment: while he wasn't reborn with the physical aspect of his torture, the memory of pain and the trauma made his chronic pain a lot worse than it was before, and he can no longer walk unaided.
He designed the silver ring and wrist splints back in Eregion with Narvi's help, and ended up literally living up to his name (which means "silver fist/grasping hand").
Paradoxically these were a great motivation for him to work through his trauma and go back to the forge, because he couldn't find a silversmith in Valinor who could make good enough ones for him, even with all of his sketches and specifications.
A lot of his work since reembodiment has been designing and making disability aids for people.
He uses platform crutches to spare his hands as much as possible. He invented and designed them, of course, as well as the KAFO brace that he wears here. He's also a part-time wheelchair user.
He is still wearing dwarven beads in his hair. He obviously didn't bring anything back from Middle-Earth but he asked Gimli to make them for him in remembrance of Narvi. His tunic is also dwarven-inspired.
He is pretty chill about Sauron here. I don't know if there was a redemption (I have feelings about @chthonion's The Harrowing and @mynameisjessejk's Otter Mayhem) or if he's just been through enough elf-therapy to be able to joke about it. Celegorm's sense of humour is just Like That.
Celegorm and Celebrimbor are about to try Vairë's special painkilling tea for the first time 👀
Between all of them they should really open a disability aids shop or something. They just might! Míriel doesn't really ever leave Vairë's house but I think Celegorm and Celebrimbor will keep visiting her a lot, and eventually all of the grandkids will as well.
Image description and transcriptions:
Two digital comic book pages.
Image 1: The first case takes the whole width, showing two pairs of feet with each two canes/crutches on a tiled floor, with a speech bubble saying "Do you think she'll want to see us?"
The second line has two cases in 2/3 and 1/3 format. The first shows two hands in red fingerless gloves working on a tapestry on a loom. The second shows part of a light-skinned face in profile, with curly white hair. Three speech bubbles say "My love?" "Um?" "There are people here asking for you."
The bottom part has one case off-center showing the same hand undoing the brake of a wheelchair, with a speech bubble saying "Your grandson and your great-grandson." above and one saying "I'll be right here." below. Then a full-length off-case portrait of Miríel, a light-skinned elf with shoulder-length curly white sitting in a wheelchair and pushing herself. She's wearing a pale pink embroidered dress with red accents, red fingerless gloves and elbow pad and brown boots and smiling.
Image 2: A single large case shows two elves standing in a room with a tiled floor, with a large door and two tables behind them. There are thread spools on one table and a tea set on the other. One elf, Celebrimbor, is brown-skinned and slightly chubby, with long black hair in a braided bun, wearing a red tunic and dark green pants. He is leaning on two decorated platform combo crutches made of wood and metal, with a KAFO brace on his leg. He wears finger and hand silver splints. The other elf, Celegorm, is pale and has long white hair in a high ponytail with small braids, he has tattoos on his neck and arms and he wears bandages on his shoulders, elbows and wrist. He wears a green tunic, leggings and wrap-around gaiters. He is leaning on a cane and holding up another cane, pointing at the first elf. Both canes have handles carved in the shape of wolf heads.
The speech bubbles are arranged around and below them, giving this dialogue, with the speakers distinguished by the shape of the bubble (the parts in parentheses are smaller text in the bubbles):
Celegorm: "My lady, my name is Tyelkormo, and this is my nephew Tyelpë." Miríel: "I know who you are, my wonderful children. Come sit." Celebrimbor: "That would be nice, thank you." Miríel: "Vairë, my love, would you make us some tea?" Celebrimbor: "My lady!" Celegorm: "A Vala who can make tea! (I could never get Oromë to do it.)" Miríel: "It was a long domestication process." Vairë (off screen): "Hey!" Celebrimbor: "Instant hot water! That’s nice. (I wonder if I could replicate that.)" Miríel: "She makes wonderful hot water bottles." Celegorm: "Oromë just uses his hands as hot pads." Celebrimbor: "Ew, I didn’t need to know that." Celegorm: "What? Just because your Maia burns everything he touches–" Celebrimbor: "Shut up." Miríel: "You must both tell me everything about yourself. And your partners!"
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diasdelfuego · 1 month
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Idk if there have been discussions before cause I am fairly new. But why the second interview? Why with a reporter who was made to forget the interaction? Why with someone whose career is lost? They are ill. It is covid. But mostly why revisit the interview?
ooh! i swear i have answered something about this before (there's definitely been some cool discussions, so, if you follow blogs with a tag for it, dig a bit through their meta tags!) but we do have a bit of new insight for season two, so it's a good a time as any to revisit the issue. it's one of my favorite questions too, so thank you!
have you read the first book? in case you haven't, and have managed no remain unspoiled so far, heads up that i'll mention events of the second half.
so, in the book, after wandering for decades with armand in a state of permanent divorce, louis finally revisits new orleans for the first time since he left with claudia, and that's what prompts his (disputed) encounter with lestat and his separation from armand. it feels to me that this revisited interview draws a parallel to that visit to louis' past. i mention this because we never get the impression, reading iwtv, that louis' return to nola was inspired by any one event, but rather a long accumulation of grief and time. but, of course, this possible parallel is extraneous to the story. similarly, i wrote about how the second interview serves to inscribe the whole show in a postmodern frame, and i think the choice to bring up covid in episodes one and two is more evidence of the show's claim to 'realism' than anything else; but i'm gonna try to keep the rest of my answer in the realm of the characters and what motivates them in the show.
one thing we were told during the recent tca panel is that louis is aware that he doesn't have the whole story, and he's counting on daniel to help him figure out the rest. i clapped and cheered at this, because it's what i've been saying since the first season ended, but it's nice to know i'm not completely off base.
we know louis knows —more consciously, less consciously, we'll see— that he doesn't have the whole story. the question of what, exactly, he's missing, is a complicated one, but i have my theories. i think what's most likely is that he suspects armand allowed claudia's murder but he's been unable to find proof, or he knows armand allowed it to happen but he suspects armand actually orchestrated the whole thing. there's other possibilities —i wrote something different in kidnaps!— but i have no doubt that, just like his contradictory memories of lestat's murder obscure his betrayal of claudia, what will come to light eventually will be related to her death in paris.
but why now? and why daniel?
well, i don't think the choice of daniel has much to do with daniel at all. i mean, maybe i was right all along and danlou had a torrid romance in the seventies and this is in part louis' attempt to cling onto that old affection despite the relentless wear of time. but i'm not holding my breath, and i think it's much more likely that daniel was just a guy.
i think (and that's how it is in the books, really) that daniel was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.
he went to a gay bar. it was september and claudia was a bleeding wound in louis' memory and the story came spilling out.
and i think daniel reminded louis of someone —of himself, maybe, guarded and in denial; of lestat, entitled and arrogant; even of claudia, a curious young writer who thought vampirism should give her freedom, should open the world to her. or maybe i'm wrong, and it was just what lewis says in the book, that it became unbearable for him to kill a person after getting to know them and so he could only kill strangers. in any case, i think it wasn't daniel himself, it was whatever louis was projecting on him at the time, that made it so daniel lived. i think louis probably begged armand to help save him, because it was so fresh in his mind, that other september decades ago begging lestat not to let claudia die, and armand agreed because it was what louis wanted. by the same logic, i think armand wiped daniel's memories because they would have led to madness and death, and it was probably because louis asked, not out of the goodness of his heart.
the question becomes, why would louis care about, or keep track of this random guy? and again, i don't think it was daniel that he obsessed with, but the memory of that night. i don't think louis had told that story before —not as fully as he told it to daniel, that's for sure. i don't think he had ever been able to talk openly about lestat. and, though i'm sure he remembered her every day, i don't think he could talk about claudia —certainly not to armand. he had been alone with his grief for three decades and daniel happened to be the one to open the door to it, by pure chance, and by listening to the story he became an integral part of it. i think, in the years since that first interview, louis tried to articulate his story again at least once, maybe in writing, maybe speaking to another person, but he couldn't quite hack it. and so, the more he failed to put words to his grief, and the more he spent revisiting the tapes of that first interview, the more that daniel became a stand-in for self-revelation, the key to some epiphany louis couldn't quite reach. maybe, if he could just talk to that guy again, if he could recreate the circumstances of that night, there'd be a spark, and he'd be able to make the shape of the story waiting for him in the dark.
maybe the interview, the olive branch, daniel's last hurrah, is louis' way of apologizing for almost killing the guy, or for whatever effect that first interview had in daniel's life, but i don't really think so. i don't think louis feels bad about it, beyond the fact that it reflects badly on him. however, i do think covid and daniel's parkinson's diagnosis are a big factor on why the interview is happening now.
daniel is the one human louis knows who's not his employee or his food, someone he met as an equal at a bar the way mortals do, the one living person who knows who louis was fifty years past. and what's more, he's a real flesh and blood mortal who has lived a real life. he's a father, just like louis, who has failed his daughters, just like louis. and he's dying. he gets to die. i like to think watching daniel from afar was a way for louis to get a glimpse of the life he didn't get to have, a way for him to live vicariously through someone else, and i think louis is miserably jealous of the fact that daniel has a chance to die of old age, unburdened by choice, while louis' only way out is a willfully chosen suicide.
when louis, in his letter, hopes that time has given them wisdom, i think he knows that he's painfully stagnant, that he's dead and unchanging, thats time's passing him by. going back to the same interviewer of fifty years ago, a man who has inevitably changed so much, means seeing in a human mirror the ways in which louis himself has changed, and the ways in which he can't. and, if daniel dies, then that door might be closed forever.
and this might be the danlou truther in me, but i think that daniel is the closest thing to a human friend that louis has ❤️ sure, he's a one night stand who louis almost killed and who he doesn't even particularly like, but for eighty years it's just been louis and armand, nobody else in the whole world but them, and daniel exists outside of that. once that last tether is gone, it'll be louis and armand again, alone together until the sun dies. if louis wants to tell his story to someone who knows him but doesn't know how it all went down, if he wants to look in that mirror again, this might very well be his last chance.
well, i'm never not longwinded, but i hope you found my conjecturing interesting enough. what are you thinking? what are your predictions and theories looking like?
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jungk0oksthighs · 2 years
Text
Pi Gasu | The New World
Pairing - jungkook x reader
Genre - smut, angst, E2L, vampire!jungkook
Word Count - 7.7k
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A surprise visitor makes a shocking confession that prompts you to visit Euphoria. Warnings: swearing, mentions of blood, terminal illness, violence, light smutty undertones, threatened suicide
SERIES MASTERLIST
“Your neighbour still reeks of the undead.” Hoseok shrugs nonchalantly into his shiny purple flask, heart-shaped lips tainted by his drink of choice. Donor number 101018. The donor is female, maybe a woman around her early thirties. The disappointing aftertaste of stale blood trickles down his oesophagus and dissipates into his body that died almost eighty years ago.
Across the neglected living space Yoongi’s icy glare sticks to his unconventional choice of roommate. The pair have co-habited for almost four years and yet Hoseok’s lack of empathy, lack of humanity, still manages to get under Yoongi’s skin.
It’s no secret that vampires lack basic communicational skills, empathy even more so, in a way Yoongi knows he shouldn’t let Hoseok’s offhand bitchy comments bother him. Usually they do go unnoticed, but when you’re the centrepiece of said comments he finds it difficult to see past them.
“Looks like Jungkook didn’t entertain your warning after all.” Hoseok’s white teeth bare in a sinister grin, one that spreads from ear to ear and would make any other human uncomfortable in it’s presence.
“Yeah but why would he?” Yoongi scoffs, brushing the long brunette hairs away from his forehead, legs bouncing anxiously where he sits, “I’m not a hunter. I’m not even remotely a threat to somebody like him.”
“Somebody like him?” Hoseok parrots, brow quirking curiously, “Do elaborate.”
“I don’t have time for this shit.” Yoongi rushes to his feet, a drawn-out exasperated sigh escaping him. “You know full-well what I mean.”
“A vampire?” His roommate’s tone oozes mockery when he swills the contents of his flask round and round with slender, veiny hands. “You can say the word vampire Yoongi, it’s not a slur. It’s simply what Jungkook and I are. What we’ll always be.”
At this Yoongi bites back the urge to roll his eyes, knowing how much it infuriates his best friend. Truthfully he doesn’t have the energy to argue with him right now, nor does he particularly want to draw a sword in a battle he’ll ultimately lose. “I’m not a threat to Jungkook, of course he didn’t take my threat seriously. Clearly there’s more going on between him and Y/N than she’s letting on.”
The sea of possibilities is endless enough for your neighbour to drown and struggle to breathe. What is going on between you and Jungkook? Everybody knows humans fornicating with vampires is heavily, heavily frowned upon – in some cases completely illegal. But who is he to judge? He lives with the undead, his only real ‘friend’ being a certified corpse of almost eighty years.
Yoongi met Hoseok while working as a paramedic, when he was called to the scene of a house fire where everybody trapped inside was announced dead on the scene, their souls claimed by the roaring flames heating the night sky. Save for one man. One ghoulish looking, freakishly well preserved and eccentrically dressed man.
Yoongi knew straight away he was a vampire, he’d heard all about them and how you can spot them from a mile away. The warm sunset glow beneath their skin, their flawless features, and of course – their wine coloured eyes. Did he expect to find a friend within the monster who survived a house fire without so much as a scratch? No, he did not. But he did take an interest in him, having heard all about what a drop of his blood could do for someone in need.
At first Hoseok was hesitant to befriend the human, understandably so, until Yoongi confirmed the foundation of their ‘friendship’ was solely curiosity. Hoseok would provide the paramedic with blood samples to help save his patients in near-death conditions. Yoongi had a spare room in a judgement free space. It wasn’t ideal for either party involved, but it worked. It still works, mostly. Despite the fact Yoongi was caught medicating patients with vampire blood and fired on the spot, the two still remain friends.
“You can deny it all you want but I know you like her…” Hoseok calls out from the lounge while the other man walks away, even with his roommate’s back turned to him he can sense the annoyance and disgust, “You don’t play nurse for just anybody.”
Yoongi stills, taking a deep inhale. He doesn’t bother to glance back at the loudest dead man he’s ever had the displeasure of meeting, “I don’t want her to die, that’s all.”
That’s not all, not by a long shot. Yoongi has secretly admired you from afar since you moved into the building, taking an interest in your daily routine and what colour outfit you wear each day. He likes the little smile you give him when you wave, he even enjoys hearing the sound of that ridiculous early 2000’s pop punk playlist that seeps through your walls whenever you’re having a bad day.
It wasn’t until he saw Jungkook enter your apartment that he took it upon himself to be more present in your life. According to Hoseok, Jungkook is a very bad man. Dead man. Vampire. Whatever you want to call him, he’s evil. Though Hoseok has never delved into the specifics of how the two creatures of the night know each other. Hoseok doesn’t share anything personal about his past, and truthfully Yoongi has never cared. Up until now.
“Who says he’ll kill her?” In the blink of an eye Hoseok is standing in front of Yoongi, his masculine features eerily tugged up, amused, “Maybe he’ll change her.”
“That’s illegal.” Yoongi scoffs, “There’s no way she’d let him do that—”
“I’m sure she lets him do all kinds of illegal stuff to her…” Hoseok’s chuckle echoes like a sadistic villain in a movie, his grin widening, “If you want to be romantically involved with her you should—”
“Wanting somebody to stay alive is not romantic.” His retort laced with poison, veiny fists balling either side of his denim-clad thighs. There’s a stand off happening between the two friends, both parties exchanging heated eye contact before Hoseok’s nostrils flare, head snapping to the direction of the front door shockingly fast.
“Seems like your neighbour has a visitor…” His tone lowers, smile fading, “One of Jungkook’s creations.”
A series of loud knocks on your front door wins you to jump, cursing under your breath when you accidentally smudge the white varnish you’re painting your toenails with. Begrudgingly getting up from the sofa you drag yourself to the front door, praying to every higher power it’s not Jungkook standing at the other side of the wood.
‘If I had a soul it would already be yours.’
Jungkook’s heart-breaking confession plays clear as day in your mind, winning you to swallow. You haven’t seen him since, nor have you replied to his messages about making donations. Truthfully you can’t wrap your head around the events that transpired in his basement last week. Jungkook kissed you. What’s worse is how much you liked it, and how much it’s haunted your thoughts ever since. His lips on yours, the taste of his blood, the way your toes curled when he pinned you to a wall so hard that it crumbled around you.
And the way his fangs scraped the skin of your neck, almost biting you.
It’s with a lot of hesitance and mental preparation that you finally swing the door open, equal parts confused and relieved when you catch sight of Jimin standing before you. Every hair on your body stands to attention, guarding your suddenly cold shivering skin.
“Hi?” You’re frowning, as is he when his stern gaze flickers over your pink striped Hello Kitty pyjamas. “What do you want?”
You didn’t intend to sound bitchy and rude, it’s just that the only time you’ve seen Jimin out and about he physically shoved you into his car and took you to Jungkook. You’re not particularly dressed for such occasion tonight. Nor do you really want to see the owner of Euphoria either, not until you figure out what the hell it is he wants from you. And what you want from him.
Jimin smirks, taking it upon himself to lean against your doorframe, “Can I come in?” His crimson coloured eyes zone in on his fingernails and plentiful aged silver rings. It’s when he tucks the stray shiny silver hairs behind his ear that he glances to you again, seemingly growing impatient. “Please?” He grins, and your stomach churns.
“Why?”
He rolls his eyes, pushing himself off the doorframe with an audible huff, “I'd like to talk to you.”
“About what?” You cross your arms over your chest, standing your ground. If you let him inside he’ll have an open invitation for as long as your name is on the tenancy agreement. But as you watch his snake print Doc Marten tap the ground somewhat restlessly, your curiosity blossoms. “Is… Is this about Jungkook?”
At this Jimin’s smile darkens into something… sinister. Much like the setting of a cliché Halloween movie, the lightbulb in the hallway flickers behind him and his shadow grows in size. Sighing again, more exasperatedly this time, he buries his fists into the pockets of his black fitted suit trousers, visibly tensing his shoulders. There’s a mutual understanding between you, his crescent-like eyes already answering all your questions.
This is definitely about Jungkook.
“So. Can I come in?”
Much to the disappointment of your better judgement you find yourself nodding, lips pursing into a flat line before you pluck up the courage to speak. “Uh-, yeah come in.” You stand to one side, watching determined footsteps bring the first vampire you ever encountered into your home.
Despite the fact you weren’t expecting company tonight you still feel underdressed. Currently dressed in comfy pyjamas that drown your figure half-way through a selfcare evening, while Jimin’s wearing a snakeskin patterned shirt tucked into his slacks, perfectly matching his choice of footwear. His shirt sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, revealing tattoos you didn’t realise he had before. Much like Jungkook almost all his skin is littered with artwork, you catch yourself staring before he edges closer to your sofa. Sitting down.
“You know there’s a long term solution for remaining young and beautiful...” Jimin hums, taking your skincare products from the coffee table between his fingers with a scoff, “Does any of this actually work?” His eyes find yours, brows raised expectantly.
You bite back a laugh, not having expected such a normal conversation with the blood sucking demon currently wedged between two fluffy pink cushions on your sofa. “Umm. I think so, I mean I hope they do some of that stuff is expensive…” Your tongue awkwardly rolls over your teeth, “So… Is this about what happened when I visited—”
“Jungkook’s drinking your blood.” Jimin looks at you, through you, waiting for any kind of reaction.
“…What?” You whisper, heart hammering inside your chest strong enough to mistake the beat for palpitations. Palms sweaty, mouth dry. “What do you mean Jungkook’s drinking my blood?!”
At this Jimin audibly pops his tongue to the roof of his mouth, a distraction from the fact he’s rolling his eyes into the back of his skull again. Bored looking, unphased. “The vials of your blood you’ve been giving to him.” A single brow quirks, “He’s been drinking them.”
“H-how did-, how do you know about—”
“I found the empty vials.” He shrugs, chuckling softly to himself while adjusting his position, until his ankle rests on his knee, leaning back with a grin, “I could smell your blood in a blind line up without trying.”
“You’ve got it wrong,” You’re shaking your head, jumping to Jungkook’s defence a lot faster than you should, “He’s not drinking them, he’s running tests on them to see why my blood is… Different.”
Jimin loses it, throwing his head back in a fit of loud menacing laughter that makes you uneasy. He’s laughing so hard that he’s struggling to breathe properly, slapping his palm to his forehead. “The curse of humanity never fails to amuse me.” He snorts, too busy judging you to look your way. He continues, “Humans… So naïve. So painfully, obnoxiously ignorant to the world around them. Life isn’t a fucking fairy tale sweetheart.”
It's with a heavy heart and a sour taste in your mouth akin to battery acid that the penny finally drops, “There… There are no tests, are there?”
“Jungkook is many things, but a scientist?” Jimin’s still laughing, borderline hysterical at your naivety, “He’s no saint either, don’t act so surprised. He doesn’t have a soul much less a conscience.”
Anger floods your body like a roaring fire, prompting you to shift your weight between your legs, physically unable to hold still. “Why are you telling me this?” You snap, eyes glued to the man, the monster making a mockery of you in your own damn apartment. Pushing down your own emotions; the betrayal, the fury, the confusion. You try to keep your head blank of any incriminating thoughts about kissing Jungkook, knowing they’d be violated instantly.
The giggles stop, and Jimin’s voice deepens into something much more frightening.
He cranes his neck, hunching his muscular body forward on the sofa as if to get a better look at you. A look is an understatement. The way his icy glare drags up your pyjama clad body forces you to look away, until he’s standing before you faster than you can process. His nose is a hair away from your own, winning you to stumble back a few steps into the coat stand, knocking it over in a hurry.
“Sometimes it’s fun to play with your food.” A bloodthirsty smirk tugs the corners of his plump lips, “Nice seeing you Y/N.” A dreamy, satisfied sigh slips from him before he disappears.
That liar. That evil bastard.
You feel violated, disgusted and scared. Why would Jungkook lie to you about testing your donations? Why would he? Why would he ask you to you touch yourself? In his presence none the less.
‘Arousal makes the blood… sweeter.’
His words torment you like a painful mantra, like a sad song from your past. It all makes sense. The need, the urgency, the demand for you to keep donating. You feel like a fool for not connecting the dots sooner, but why would Jimin come directly to you with this information?
Unless he really is just a bored, ancient demon hellbent on causing trouble...
Sleep doesn’t come easy to you that night, you’re tossing and turning, back damp from equal parts sweat and blind hatred. You simultaneously want to confront Jungkook about this and never wish to see him again. But what’s bothering you more is the fact that… Had he simply told you the truth about drinking your blood, you genuinely don’t think you would’ve cared.
But he didn’t.
--
You’re sitting in the campus library revising for a big exam you have coming up, it’s nearly Christmas break and you’re almost done with college for a whole three weeks. That’s the only thing that makes sitting here for hours on end with your nose buried in five textbooks at once remotely worth it. You need a break. The plan is to go and visit Eddie and spend Christmas in your nightmarish childhood home. Frankly it’s better than being here, the prospect of seeing Jungkook equally as daunting as your mother. Maybe more so.
It's been all of twenty eight hours since Jimin showed up to your apartment unannounced and uninvited. Though technically the silver haired vampire is eternally invited into your home now. But it’s not like you gave him a spare key and orange juice on arrival, no, all you did was invite him inside. A mistake in itself.
Maybe you should move away after graduation? It’s not for another two years but it beats staying here in a spooky city riddled with crime and vampires. Two of which can stop by your place any time they’d like. Let’s be honest, it’s not like a simple lock and key would be able to stop them from getting inside.
“You’re Y/N, right?” The female voice drags you from your daydream. Peeling your stare from the book in hand, you turn to the owner of said voice.
A wave of recognition washes over you, it’s Betty. You’d met her at your first ever night at Euphoria, the same night Jungkook had sent you home for being ‘too good’ for his vampire customers. In reality he probably just wanted to control the situation, control you, keep you to himself. Keep your blood to himself. Swallowing, you physically shake the intrusive thoughts from your mind and offer the girl a small smile.
“Hey, yeah… It’s Betty, isn’t it?” You gesture to the empty green fabric seat ahead of you, and she slips into the space effortlessly despite her very big clunky black boots and oversized knitted dress.
“Yeah!” Her teeth are pearly white, contrasting against the red lipstick she’s showcasing. She really is beautiful, the epitome of lust even when dressed casually. If you had to describe her you would use the term ‘poster girl for pornography’. She’s a woman written for people who love women, who want to fuck women and repopulate the earth with them. Spend their lives with them, celebrate them.
Or to put it simply: she’s a hottie with the best damn body you’ve ever seen.
“I haven’t seen you since my first day at the club!” She whispers, briefly glancing round the busy library in search of nosey students, “You… You quit, right? That’s what Jungkook said.”
At this you fight the urge to scoff, she doesn’t deserve your venom after all, “Mmm. Well don’t believe everything Jungkook says.” You mumble, pawing at the stack of books between as a distraction.
Her pretty features tug with something quizzical, brows pinched, “Oh? Did something happen between you guys?”
“Nope.” You emphasise the ‘p’ with a loud popping noise, offering her a fake grin that she can clearly see right through, judging from the way she sits back in her chair and watches you even closer.
“I didn’t think he was like that…” Betty admits hastily, tapping manicured fingers to the table edge seemingly deep in thought, “I mean-, he’s hot! He’s sooooo hot. Like S tier hot, yknow? But I didn’t think humans were his—”
“Nothing happened. Honestly.” You lie, the truth being far worse.
It’s not about the morally grey fact you gave him your blood willingly. You’d met Betty at Euphoria – she’s doing the exact same thing every single weekend, as she was hired to do. Of course her donations were a little more intimate than anything you’d done with her boss but- well. Almost more intimate.
It was just a kiss. It was just a kiss. It didn’t mean anything to either of you.
‘If I had a soul, it would already be yours.’
“You should come to the party tonight!” Betty gasps as though she’s just had the eureka moment of the century, leaning forward, “There’s a huge party at Euphoria tonight for Taehyung’s birthday! You met Tae Tae, right? The blonde guy… Always sucking a lollipop. Or someone’s neck.” She giggles, adjusting the turtle collar on her dress. Telling you everything you need to know.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” You say cautiously, though you appreciate the invitation none the less, “Thanks though, I’m sure you’ll all have a great time.”
Betty waggles her slender index finger, flaunting a small dark snake tattoo that looks freshly done on the digit, “No no no no, you should definitely come. I know things didn’t work out work wise but it’d be nice to hang out with you!” She smiles, a single dimple piercing her left cheek, “Please? I only moved here recently and I don’t have any girl friends… Girls are usually intimidated by me.”
Maybe it’s the genuine desperation weighing her eyelids, or maybe it’s the idea of blindsiding Jungkook and confronting him about your donations. Whatever the reason, you find yourself crumbling and nodding along with her words, sighing. Quickly exchanging phone numbers and planning the night ahead.
Truthfully you don’t have many friends here either, and while your intentions may not be entirely genuine Betty does seem like a good person.
--
It’s almost 10PM later that night when you arrive at Euphoria via a very expensive Uber. It’ll be worth it, you mentally justify the money spent. It will be worth it. As will the goose bumps gifted by the cold winter air scraping your exposed skin. You’ve opted for a very revealing dress for maximum damage. The strapless black velvet dress plunges at the middle of your cleavage, leaving very little if nothing at all to the imagination. The swell of your ass is barely concealed, legs appearing a whole lot longer than they actually are with some assistance from your stiletto heels.
Is this what self-sabotage looks like? Jungkook could crush you like a grape juice box in hand, as any of his immortal staff members could. You know it’s a bad idea, but like you’ve told him before – it’s not like you have much to live for. You’ve nothing to lose at this point.
The security guard checks your ID and allows you to slip inside, you promised Betty you would meet her here at ten which makes you right on time. You’re surprised yet relieved when your purse goes unsearched, giving that you’ve brought a little insurance to keep you safe.
Truthfully ever since Betty invited you here tonight you've had one hell of a realisation. Jungkook could very well be the cure for your brother's rapidly approaching demise... You just need to keep your mind blank of any thoughts of your plans beyond the threshold of the club. They can read minds, and you won't fall into that trap again. While your chest bubbles and squeezes with something strange whenever you think about the last time you saw Jungkook... You push that down, deep, deep down until it's almost forgotten about. You're here for one reason and one reason only.
Euphoria is in full swing when you make it inside, the sexy bass-dominant song vibrating your bones, it’s deafeningly loud in your ears and you ponder if wearing a high ponytail was the right move to make. The fifty shades of red strobe lights are blinding, almost painful to look at and you can't quite make out the faces in the crowd. But you’re here. Full of adrenaline and a desire to piss off Jungkook. Another terrible, terrible idea.
It's when you make your way through the busy floor, ignoring the intense stares bruising your body, that you find Taehyung sitting on what can only be described as a throne in front of the main stage. You swallow a chuckle, vampires really know how to party.
“Hey, Taehyung?” You call out a little louder than you intended, winning every pair of fire-engine red eyes to snap towards you, like a vengeful moth to a vulnerable flame. “Have you seen Betty?” You feign confidence, feeling smaller than small when you catch sight of the birthday boy grinning wickedly. Removing a cherry lollipop from his plump lips with an audible pop.
Taehyung stands, adjusting his shirt with long fingers before his thick brows raise with something akin to genuine, human surprise. “Y/N? To what do I owe the pleasure?” He’s making his way over, lazy footsteps carrying his leather-clad legs your way.
“I’m looking for Betty, she said she’d be here…” You reiterate, swallowing your nerves. Useless really, giving that Taehyung and every other creature of the night can sense your inner turmoil from a mile away. “Have you seen her?”
“No, I haven’t.” His voice is deep, slightly croaky and albeit a little endearing to listen to, “Aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday?” His smile broadens, his pink tongue rolling over his teeth salaciously. As if he’s staring at his next meal, feline eyes flickering to your exposed neck before settling back to your face.
It’s the shiny gold crown atop of his hair that you focus on, perfectly matching the long gold chain sitting behind the collar of his black silky dress shirt. “Happy birthday,” You offer him a closed smile, “How old are you?”
“Twenty nine if anyone else asks. I'm technically one hundred and seventy nine.” He hums with pride, returning the sticked candy to his mouth, crossing his muscular arms over his strong chest, “You know Jungkook won’t be happy that you’re crashing my party little one.”
“Betty invited me.” You mirror his movements, accidentally pushing the swell of your breasts up by doing do. The ancient yet well-preserved vampire notices, his not-so-subtle stare lands on your cleavage and stays there. He’s smirking.
“Betty’s not here right now.” He wets his lips, heavy eyes slowly trailing back to your face.
Right. Betty isn’t here right now when she said she would be. Less than ideal, giving that you’re in a vampire nightclub and know full-well how much everybody in here wants to kill you.
You nod, attempting to act indifferent, “She’ll be here soon…”
“And in the meantime,” He edges closer, until he’s less than arms-distance away from your body, “What do you say we have a little fun?” He grins, looking like the epitome of sin when he sizes up the pulsing vein on your neck.
That’s when your knight in shining armour swoops onto the scene, knocking Taehyung to the ground and keeping him there with a foot firmly pressed to his throat. The atmosphere shifts immediately. It’s intense, dark and frightening. But that doesn’t deter Taehyung, not in the slightest. In the blink of an eye Taehyung rushes to his feet, pinning up the other vampire to a nearby wall, vice-like grip crushing his throat. Jungkook doesn’t do as much as blink, nor does he fold.
Maybe knight in shining armour is an overstatement. More like your favourite blood thirsty enemy showing up and making a scene. Winning you more attention than you'd ever expected. Or wanted.
You’re standing there wide-eyed and frozen in place, like stunned frostbite has enveloped your senses. It’s a moment later when Taehyung is thrown to the other side of the club, his back slamming against the silver edge of the main stage – prompting the dancers to stop what they’re doing. Had Taehyung been human his spine would’ve shattered like a mirror, this being a brutally strong reminder he’s not. Nor is the creature responsible for such violence.
“What are you doing here?” Jungkook’s tone oozes wrath when his dark eyes snap to yours, teeth bared in an angry snarl that has you regretting the decision to come here immediately. He’s going to kill you.
You blink at him, astonished by his strength and burly behaviour, “I-, Betty invited me—”
“Now is that any way to treat the birthday boy?” Taehyung taunts as he jumps back over, scoffing when he’s squaring up to Jungkook right in front of you, “Maybe if you kept your pet on a tighter leash she wouldn’t be here.”
That’s when Jungkook loses what little remaining self-restraint he had left, delivering an uppercut punch to Tae’s sharp jawline so strong that he flies up to the ceiling, crashing into a luxurious chandelier. Sparkles fall from the impact, like beautiful glimmering raindrops scattering over the crowd. It’s like everything happens in slow motion, it’s gorgeous, until the screams of the customers remind you that the shimmers are nothing more than broken glass.
Jungkook’s inked fingers grip your wrist tight enough to snap bones, and quicker than you’re physically and mentally capable of processing you’re standing in a secluded room you’ve not seen previously. It’s a luxurious VIP room of sorts. There’s a bed adorned with plentiful red velvet pillows and an aged, steel medieval-looking pair of shackles tightly connected to a strong hook on the wall above the wooden headboard. Much like the rest of Euphoria this room has the undertone of seduction. Causing your heart to stutter twice as hard as it had just moments before.
It's dark in here, the only other person in the room barely visible under the dim burgundy lights that scream sex.
“I’ll ask you again,” Jungkook locks the door behind him, turning to face you with sharp features contorted with thunder, “Why are you here?”
“I was invited.” You bite between clenched teeth, ignoring the way his muscles flex beneath the very sheer black shirt he wears with every angry breath he takes. There's an almost floral-like pattern weaved into the mesh material, but it's very much the visibility of his tattoos and beefy body that you're looking at.
It seems as though everybody has dressed in all black today, something you’ve only just registered looking at Jungkook’s fitted black slacks and smart shoes of the same colour. Perhaps it’s a cynical joke within the vampire community. While they treat birthdays as a cause for celebration, maybe they’re all secretly mourning their stolen humanity.
Tousled hair frames Jungkook's jarringly handsome features, drawing attention to the way his expression drips with equal parts disgust and fury. “How many times do I need to tell you? You don’t belong here.” He takes a small step closer, cold stare burning a hole in your skull, “You shouldn’t have come here.”
“Yeah well I shouldn’t have done a lot of things.” You bark, trying to steady your shaky breaths. “Why are you so pissed that I came?”
The raw intent behind Jungkook’s eyes deepens with something indescribable, he’s slowly closing in on you like a lion would its prey, “When are you going to stop being so reckless with your mortality? You could’ve been killed—”
“If you wanted me dead I would be by now.” You mirror his previous words against him, fighting the urge to think of anything Jimin told you in private. Burying the real reason you came deep within the walls of you mind. He’s not going to find out you know by invading your mind, no, nor is he going to know why you're here until you want him to. You’re doing this on your terms.
“That’s beyond the point.” He scoffs, dragging his heels across the glossy tiled floor, it's shiny enough to mirror the reflection of his body, “Had I not been here to protect you Taehyung would’ve ripped your heart out without hesitation.”
“Protect me?” You chuckle humourlessly, holding strong eye contact and a proud spine when he’s no more than ten inches away from you, “Why do you want to keep me alive? Why don’t you want me dead Jungkook? Hm?” You frown, feigning confusion, “Is there something I don’t know? A reason my life is so damn important to you?”
Before you can spare a thought for Betty's whereabouts, for Jimin's confession, for anything beyond this moment, Jungkook’s heavy arms are around you. His tattooed hand gently tugging your ponytail back until your bare neck is exposed to the demon. He swallows, darting his tongue over his pierced lips to wet them.
"There's a reason I haven't killed you, the only reason I don't snap your neck where you stand." He hisses.
"Enlighten me then."
"It's selfish."
"I expected nothing less." You scoff, line of sight flickering to his lips on it's own accord. As much as you want to hate him, as much as you want to never see him again... You're drawn to him. You always have been.
Jungkook pauses, smirking slightly when he notices where you're looking, "Why are you here?"
You deadpan, "Why am I still alive?"
"Because it's in my best interest that your heart keeps beating." You're lost in his eyes, unwillingly, but they're so intense and haunting that you can't bring yourself to look away.
"...Why?"
“Because you make me feel like the man I never had the chance to become.” He lowers his face down, until his lips are brushing the skin of your cheek, barely a touch but it still earns shivers to run down your spine, your whole body trembling with anticipation, “The years I’ve spent thinking my soul was lost forever were nothing but a journey to find its other half…” His lips glide to the shell of your ear, his words barely audible when they fall from his mouth, “Right here, inside you.”
They’re just words. They’re nothing but words.
There’s an uncomfortable lump of yearning deep inside your throat that you’re struggling to swallow. The anger, the betrayal, the blood-curdling disgust at his lies is dissipating into your veins. Replaced by tingles and butterflies, a feeling so intense it’s as if every nerve in your body is aflame, every line of defence melting from the unmistakable fire of passion.
His lips are a hair away from yours, the soft bend of his nose resting on your cheek, face slanted, his eyes fluttered shut.
“To lose you, is my only fear.”
“You can’t lose something you never had.” You whisper back, and Jungkook’s heavy eyelids open just enough for him to analyse your reaction.
His breath is warm on your lips, contrasting against the coolness of his silver lip ring that’s somehow even closer now, “Having you would be an extraordinary honour, but my intention isn’t to seduce you.”
“Then what is your intention…?” You gasp quietly, thrown off-balance by the unexpected heat of this moment. Without realising it Jungkook has walked you back to the bed, allowing you to fall onto the mattress before he’s caging you in. His immortal being on top of yours, holding himself in place with one hand as the other trails the naked skin of your collarbone.
His eyes are stuck on you from above, messy hair tickling your cheeks when a gentle smile creases his supple skin. “Over the centuries I’ve seduced countless women, but now I’m forced to accept that you’re the only one to seduce me. My only intention is to finally submit to that feeling.”
Overwhelmed by this moment of forever, the white hot disgust in him long forgotten - you kiss him.
Your bodies mould against each other's, fitting together with a stunning perfection you’ve never felt before. His pouted lips are soft against your own but desperate, moving so quickly that the air is knocked from your lungs. Your tongue slips into his mouth and is messily greeted with his own, the two muscles working in perfect sync when a blissful sigh fills the otherwise silent room.
“But... What if I want you to seduce me?” You pant between a string of kisses so hungry your whole body feels starved of touch. The mutual greed for each other is unsatisfiable, your fingertips are buried in his long raven locks, his free hand exploring your curves with so much pressure that you know you’ll be bruised.
But you don’t care.
Jungkook pulls back with long fangs, a heaving chest and a voice so horse and thickened by lust that it sends a pang of heat straight to your core, “I’ll have you in every way I can get you.”
He kisses you again, and this time there’s a familiarity of his lips brushed against yours that consumes you. Like two halves of one whole finally shredding their pride and submitting to their fate. He takes you by the waist and flips your bodies atop of the mattress, until your legs are straddling his thick thighs and he’s laid flat on his back.
Leaning down you crush your lips to his, physically incapable of breaking the bond between you. Jungkook’s hands fly up to the headboard so strongly that he breaks the wood, it’s crumbling between his fingertips but he never stops kissing you back. Not once. Not even to stop you from pushing the thin material of his shirt up his body, until every bump and crevice of his taught abdomen is hit with cold air.
Busying his hands with tearing the throw pillows apart he deepens the kiss into something more. Something that has your body screaming for him to be closer, something that ignites your body from your scalp to your toes.
“Even in death, I’ve never felt so alive.” He heaves against your mouth, distracting himself from the desire to feed by gripping your hips and pulling you closer to his noticeably growing anticipation.
“Ah.” You hiss, wincing in pain when the hold of your bones is harsh enough to crush them, “Jungkook…” You whisper, breaking away from his mouth, “You’re hurting me.”
With no hesitation spared Jungkook removes his hands, snaking one up to his fangs where he plunges them deep into his wrist. The eternal crimson liquid stains his lips before they find yours again, the taste of his blood providing you with a rush of euphoria. The ache in your hips seemingly never existing to begin with.
All you can think about is his nearness, the fact your bodies are writhing around so fearlessly swept up in each-other’s presence. Nothing else matters. He’s addicting. His body, his lips, and dare you say it even his blood.
Reality wins you to pause, take a beat away from him to catch your breath. This is the same vampire that lied to you about your blood donations, the same vampire who has been slugging back shots of your DNA as if it were the most normal, mundane thing on earth.
“I want you,” Jungkook pants, showcasing his inhumane strength when he’s flipped your bodies until you’re the one pinned down. There’s a loud snap from beneath you and you’re almost rolling off the mattress before he catches you, adjusting your positions until you’re at the other end of the bed. The wood crumbles beneath your weight, feathers exploding in the air when he takes a fistful of pillow beside you.
“All of you. Your mind, your body… Your soul.” He pants, lips trailing down your neck in a string of wet kisses that make your head spin, “My deepest desire is to conquer everything you have, everything you are. Until you’re mine.”
But his list is one detail short. Your blood.
A surge of arrogance rushes through you, prompting you to push him back and climb on top of him. To your equal parts surprise and relief he allows this, his body shuddering with something you feel too. Unmistakable, undeniable, uncontrollable lust. You distract him with your kiss, not missing the way a low moan slips into your mouth along with his tongue. Your body is desperate for more, as is your heart. But much to the disappointment of your libido you listen to your brain and restrain him. Binding his hands with the shackles you spotted on arrival.
As soon as they click into place you find the strength to peel away from Jungkook, after one final kiss. A kiss you’re certain will be your last, so you make it count. You kiss him again and again, until the remains of his blood is smeared across both your lips. Until you’re gasping for air. Until he registers where his hands are placed and what you’ve just done.
“Don’t be scared,” He coos, leaning forward where his tongue meets the structure of your jawline, licking the skin so sinfully you have to bite back a groan, “Untie me, I want to feel your body writhe beneath mine when I annihilate you.”
Despite the overwhelming urge to see his words through, you stop. You muster the strength to get off the now very broken bed and stand before him. Adjusting your dress that apparently was pushed up to reveal your underwear merely moments before. Glancing round the room in search for your purse you find it, holding it between your fingers when Jungkook’s deep voice catches your attention.
“Did I hurt you?” The guilt in his voice is enough to tug at your heartstrings, and you have to remind yourself of the lies he’s told you. Where your donations were really going all this time. You swallow, finally looking his way.
He’s a mess. A heavy breathing, pornographic looking mess. Raven wayward hairs tickle the bridge of his nose, but it’s his blood-stained lips and prominent fangs that remind you that ending this here was the right decision. No matter how badly you want him, how much you crave his touch, his body, his heart. He’s a monster. A vampire. A liar.
“No, you didn’t.” You mumble, swallowing.
It’s now or never, you’ve managed to keep these thoughts at bay this entire night. The whole reason you came here to begin with. You never intended for it to go this far, you didn’t plan on anything like this happening at all. But once again you found yourself caught in the sticky web of the most handsome demonic spider you've ever encountered.
“What’re you doing? What’s in the bag?” His angled chin tips to your purse, noticing that your anxious gaze keeps flickering between him and the accessory.
“Insurance.” You whisper.
“Insurance for what?”
The sexual tension has shifted into something much, much darker. Now that your breaths are steady and your mind de-clouded from the spell of Jungkook’s lips you know what you have to do. You think about Eddie, his condition, how much pain your twin brother is in every single day.
And how you can stop it.
“I need a vial of your blood.” Your eyes snap to his, and he looks hurt. The calmest expression haunts his handsome features, but in spite of the fact he doesn’t visibly seem angry – you’ve never been more terrified of him. “My-, my brother is terminally ill. I need—”
“Untie me.” He growls, the chains clanging against the steel hook on the wall. You recognise the scripting of the shackles, they're identical to the ones in his basement, you know that for whatever reason he’s bound by them until you say otherwise. “So that’s why you came here tonight, hm? For my blood.”
“It’s the least you can do for me.” You sniff. To bring up the lies, or to leave them in the dark? Now that is the question.
“I’m not giving your sick brother my blood. I don’t give anybody my blood, it’s mine.”
“You gave it to me.” You remind him, reaching into your purse for your ‘insurance’ that he will do as you say. One way or another you’re going to use him exactly how he used you, and hopefully save your brother’s life in the process.
Jungkook’s features drop until no emotion remains, “That’s different. You're different. You can take me in every way imaginable.”
“I won’t ask you nicely again.”
“I implore that you don’t.” He scoffs, “It’s never going to happen. You’re the only exception.”
With a pounding heart and sweaty palms you peel the gun from your purse, clicking the safety off before you aim it toward the one thing standing in the way of Eddie’s recovery. Jungkook is amused to say the least, a sinister grin tugging the corners of his blood-stained, pierced lips when a light-hearted sigh escapes him.
“Do you know anything about vampires? That won’t kill me.” He chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief, “Either stop talking nonsense and untie me, or get over here so we can finish what we started. I’m willing to overlook your little outburst just this once.”
Ignoring his pleas you nod, slowly, calculatedly, “I might not know much about your kind but I do know one or two things about you…” You whisper, flexing your wrist until the barrel of the gun is pressed tightly against the hollow of your temple. The temperature of the cold weapon shocks you enough to drown out the sounds of Jungkook battling with his restraints, snarling and swearing that you release him immediately.
“I have no reason to live, yet every reason to die.” Your eyes well up with tears, you’ve ingested vampire blood. Jungkook’s blood. If he doesn’t give into your commands you’ll be one of his kind for eternity… It wasn’t the plan, but it’ll have to suffice, you know you won’t get this chance again.
“Give me your blood Jungkook. Or you’ll lose your pet blood bag forever.”
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