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#mat barzal smut
theemporium · 15 days
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please im begging... thigh riding mat barzal smut.... please
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
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“Shit, baby, I gotta leave soon.”
“No, you don’t,” you mumbled defiantly, your fingers curled in his hair to tug his head back as your lips trace over his pulse point. “You have ages.” 
“I still need to get ready,” Mat murmured, but it was half-hearted at best. His hands were gripping your hips, his body sinking back into the couch as you continued to kiss along his neck. “The boys are gonna give me shit if I’m late again—”
“Tragic,” you retorted, though he could feel your smile pressed against him. 
“Baby,” Mat groaned before he ducked his head down, until his lips found yours again. “You’re a menace.” 
You pulled back, your hands dropping to rest on his chest. “Sorry for wanting to spend some time with my boyfriend after he’s been away for a week,” you grumbled but the smile remained on your face. “I think I need to have a word with the coaching team. It’s not fair that you have morning skate when you just came back from a roadie.” 
Mat raised his brows, amused. “Not fair for who?”
“For your lonely and neglected girlfriend,” you retorted.
Mat snorted. “My poor girl.” 
Your eyes narrowed. “Don’t mock me.”
“Never,” he grinned before he leaned back up to kiss you again. “Need some lovin’?”
“Don’t say it like that,” you muttered but you leaned into the kiss, your nails lightly scratching his chest over the material of his shirt. “Makes me sound needy.” 
“You are needy,” Mat countered, lightly pinching your hip. “And I love it.” 
“Then do something about it,” you retorted, hips rolling down to feel the bulge in his sweatpants. “Mat, baby, please…” 
Mat groaned, gripping your hips to stay still despite every cell in his body wanting to do the opposite. “Baby, I can’t.” 
You huffed, your hands on his chest as you moved to climb off his lap. 
“Hey, hey,” Mat murmured as he pulled you back down, your chests pressed together. “I said I can’t. I didn’t say you couldn’t.”
Your brows furrowed in confusion. “Mat, that doesn’t make any sense—”
“Gonna make you feel good, baby,” he murmured, lifting you up enough so you were shifted off his lap and left straddling one of his legs instead. 
Your cheeks warmed at his insinuation. “Mat—”
“C’mon, I gotta leave soon,” Mat muttered against your lips as his hands squeezed your hips. “Want my pretty girl to ride my thigh before I go.”
Your brain short circuited for a small moment. 
“S’hot, babe,” Mat continued like his suggestion hadn’t completely melted your insides and washed away any coherent thoughts with it. “Pretty sure I remember you said you wanted to try it back at All-Stars—”
“I was drunk,” you defended, but your body flushed at the reminder. “And it wasn’t my fault you had your thighs out like a slut.”
He grinned. “They are all yours, baby, use them as you please.”
Your breath hitched a little. “I don’t know…”
“Shhh, just relax f’me,” Mat whispered, leaning up to kiss you again. 
You sunk into his embrace, letting the whirling thoughts in your mind come to a halting stop as his tongue swiped along your lower lip before deepening the kiss. His hands gave your hips another squeeze before he started guiding, slowly rocking you back and forth until your body was moving on it’s own accord.
“Just like that, baby,” he praised, his forehead pressed against yours as your soft pants brushed along his lips. “That’s my pretty girl. Looking so fucking good riding my thigh like that. You look so gorgeous when you use me, baby.”
Your face flushed, a pathetic whine leaving your lips. “Mat—”
“C’mon, baby,” Mat cooed, his thumbs dipping under the hem of your shirt to swipe along your heated skin. “Give me something to think about during practice.”
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barzysunflower · 3 months
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enemies to lovers with mat with D 13 and D 22. media girl x star player where mat loves to get under her skin because he’s dumb and can’t admit he likes her. she breaks up with her horrible bf and one night when she is out with the team something changes
thank you so much for the request!! this turned out very smutty but also a long part of plot so I hope you like it <3
13. “Let me help you forget that jerk.” & 22. “Do you feel what you’re doing to me.”
word count: 6.5k
warnings: drinking, jerk ex boyfriend, SMUT (18+)
"Oh, hey guys." The elevator door opened and a bunch of laughing hockey players stumbled out.
"Hey, (y/n)! Not going back to your room are you?" Oliver broke from the conversation to greet you.
"Yeah, actually. Kinda tired," you replied, hoping the stained tears you'd just dried in the bathroom weren't that obvious.
"Oh, come on. The night is young. Come out with us." He pointed to the guys behind him, including Mat, who looked at you with an expression you couldn't make out.
"Had a bad night so far, I think I just want to stay in," you said, shaking your head and forcing a smile.
"Well, what a better way to end it with a drink?," Matt Martin chimed in, his charming smile almost convincing you.
"I think she doesn't want to come. So let her be," the other Mat said, not even looking at you, and turned away from you and started shooing the guys in the direction of the exit. The guys let it go and with a wave they started following Mat.
As you watched them walk away, the tone in which Mat had said it sunk in and the sadness you had just felt turned into anger. Looking back on the relationship you had with Mat over the past few months, you could tell you really didn't have any. You were friendly with all of the other guys, coming to work was always a blast and with being around the team so often you had developed many inside jokes and gotten to know most of the very well. Except Mat. You could tell he had a problem with you but you didn't know why when everyone else was so nice to you. When you walked into a room and Mat was joking around and acting goofy, this side of him immediately stopped when he saw you. He was always acting quiet and when it came time for you to film content with him, he was acting like his normal self when the camera was on, but the second it was off and it was just the two of you, he was back to quiet and mumbled backhanded comments.
"You know what," you snapped out of your thoughts. "I think this night does call for a few drinks."
Wally turned around with a victory shout and threw his arm around you when you caught up with them.
***
"Alright, now tell me why you're downing these shots like you want to black out." Wally's face was already a bit blurry when you moved your head too quickly, but you finally forgot your boyfriend. Sorry. Ex-boyfriend.
That's right. After three years, you finally saw through all of the red flags and gaslighting and had enough of his bullshit. Or maybe it was the fact that you caught him cheating that made you realize all of these things.
"Oh, no, no, no. I am not drunk enough to spill my secrets to you." Wally acted all offended and again tried to the information out of you and finally flagged down the waitress to get you more shots. She delivered quickly, placing four more shots in front of you.
The first went down easy, so the second should go down just as smoothly. But you never got to that. "I think you've had enough to drink," Mat's voice carried over all of the noise from the bar. Your head snapped in his direction and you saw him staring at you intensely.
"He speaks." You lifted the little glass in the air. "And who are you to tell me I've had enough to drink?"
"You couldn't even get that question out without slurring, so maybe that." His stare somehow got more intense the longer you stared back. It might have something to with the fact that you crept the shot glass closer and closer to your lips.
"You don't like me. And I don't listen to guys who don't like me." You closed your eyes and took the shot. "Anymore."
"And there it is. Boyfriend?" Wally got your attention again and slightly pushed him.
"I don't wanna talk about him." You pouted and while Wally grinned victoriously, the other guys went back to their own conversation. A few moments passed, where you started to fast track through your memories of your relationship. The good and bad ones, but the bad ones stood out. "Why are all guys such idiots?"
All six of the guys turned their head, looking at you with a playful smile. "Yep, I am suddenly extremely aware that I am sitting at a table with just guys. Excuse me."
You stumbled through the bar to the bathroom, your head was spinning like crazy, not just because of the alcohol but also because despite how your ex-boyfriend mistreated you these past few years, it was still a loss you felt deeply. He was an ass, but you loved him and that didn't just go away in a night. You had no idea how long you stood in the bathroom, trying not to fall over but also gossiping with a few girls that found you in the bathroom with whom you had now become friends with.
A loud knock and call of your name disrupted the rather nasty conversation about your ex-boyfriend. You slowly opened the door to reveal Mat standing there with a glass of water. "You ok?"
"Why do you care, Mathew?!"
"Oh my god, are you the cheating boyfriend? She told us how cruel you are so get the hell out of here! You don't deserve her!," the blonde girl, whose name you'd unfortunately already forgotten and who was one of the sweet girls listening to your little rant, pushed herself through the door and in between the two of you.
"What?," Mat said perplexed looking at you for help.
"No, that's just Mat. What do you want?"
"You've been in here for a while. Thought you might need some water."
"No, thanks." You turned away, walking deeper into the bathroom to sit on the little couch. Your head started spinning again. Why was he being nice to you?
"Here." When you looked up, the girls were gone and only Mat stood in the bathroom handing over that glass of water that looked absolutely delicious. You crossed your arms, pouting, to which he rolled his eyes and placed the glass on the counter. "He cheated? Don't tell me you're still with him?"
"No! I might have stayed with him longer than I should have, but I do have some self respect. And, again, why do you care?"
"Jesus Christ, (y/n), why the hell do you think I don't care?," he shouted at you to which you let out a loud chuckle.
"Are you kidding? You hate me. Fine. I don't care." You did. "But don't come in here pretending to care and make a fool out of me."
"What are you talking about?" You scoffed, jumping to your feet, the alcohol giving you the courage.
"What am I talking about? Are you kidding? You never talk to me. You never even look at me. You stop joking around when I'm in the same room. You're visibly in pain when I have to take some pictures and videos of you. I don't know what I ever do to you, but whatever. I don't care anymore. Clearly it's your problem."
He sighed, then took a deep breath. Still never looking directly at you. "See, you're not even looking at me now! So get out. Have a laugh about my little break down in here but leave me alone!"
"I don't hate you," he simply said, making you even more angry. He was so insufferable. Always brooding, giving you dirty looks and now he says he doesn't hate you? That's exactly what you told him, listing every time he made you feel small and unliked by him.
"From day one! I walked in, thinking this was going to be the best job ever and yes it is! But the one guy I actually wanted to like me turned out the best the biggest asshole. But that's not what everyone else says about you, so why are you so mean to me? You're not like this with the rest of the social team, so it must be me! What did I do to you? Why is it just me?," you continued to now yell at him. But he stayed silent. He was on edge though, itching to tell you but fighting to hold back whatever he wanted to say. "You know what? I have had too much to drink to have this conversation right now."
"No you didn't," he replied, pressing his lips together.
"What? Were you not there starring daggers into me while I took like six shots with Wally?"
"I had the bartender switch to water. Half the time you were drinking water. Not counting your Long Island iced tea, you maybe two shots." Hm. Maybe that's why you didn't feel as drunk as you normally would be after that many shots. Your surprised faced actually made him chuckle for a split second. "Yeah. Wally didn't notice either. On that, why the fuck were you taking shots with Wally?"
"Because he offered. And he likes me. And I like him." He looked like you just stabbed a knife in his heart. "Why? You jealous?"
He didn't answer and your heart skipped a beat.
"Why'd you do it?," you asked quietly, concerning the fact that he had made the bartender switch to water.
"Why do you ask so many questions?"
"Maybe if you would answer one once in a while I would have so many! So why did you do it? Why are you jealous?" Silence. Again. And you started to get annoyed again. "God, Mathew would you just answer the damn question! You are such a difficult person. Why did you-"
"Because I like you!," he yelled back, shutting you up.
"W-what?," you asked, very confused. "That doesn't even make sense."
"I know." At least he admitted it. His face grew soft and he closed his eyes for a second. "Let's go, I'll walk you back to the hotel."
"No! I'm not going anywhere with you," you protested, crossing your arms again. He rolled his eyes.
"Come on."
"No. Not before you explain to me why the hell you would say you like me when these past few months clearly state otherwise."
"I-." But he wasn't able to say more than that.
"Yeah, that's what I thought." Disappoint you brushed past him heading for the door, but before you could make it, his hand grabbed you by the arm, spinning you to face him. His large hands grabbed you by the sides of your face and pulled you into him until your lips met.
The act caught you off guard so it took a couple of seconds to react, but when you did you practically melted in his touch. All the pain you had felt from your breakup suddenly vanished and only warm fuzzy feelings remained. His lips were so soft and warm, you wanted to explore them further. He must have felt the same way as he began to open his mouth with a sigh. His tongue brushed over your lips and elicited a small whimpering from you in response. You quickly became addicted to his touch and lifted your own hands to feel him.
"Holy shit." You both ripped apart turning to the familiar voice. The bathroom door was open and in the frame stood Ryan who was desperately trying not to laugh. "Sorry." But just as quickly as he appeared, he disappeared again.
Stunned at what just happened, not only the kiss but also that you'd been caught, you stood in that bathroom silently. Your brain went 100 mph, but to your surprise after the eventful day you had, the only thing in your mind was that kiss.
Mat broke the silence first. "Will you let me walk you back now?"
You only managed to nod and let Mat guide you out of that bathroom. He went to go talk to the guys quickly, letting them know that you'd be leaving. You were too embarrassed to face the other, knowing that Ryan probably told them what he saw, so you awkwardly stood by the exit until Mat came back to quickly escort you outside.
"Your purse."
"Oh." You accepted it, hanging it over your shoulder. You didn't even realize you forgot it. "Thank you."
The short walk back to the hotel was silent, even the elevator ride up to your floor and up until you reached your room. "Thanks for walking me back. Good night."
You started closing the door, but Mat interrupted. "I don't hate you."
"Okay."
He chuckled. "That's it? No millions of questions?"
"You're confusing me. And I'm tired. It's late? I don't even-"
"It's 11:30," he answered your thought looking at his watch.
"Oh. What? That's it?"
He chuckled again. "Yeah you were drinking at lightning speed."
"Well, I was trying to forget a certain someone."
"I'm sorry," he said. "Sorry that he cheated on you. You don't deserve that."
You tried to smile as a thank you, but it turned out very sad. Mat's hand reached out to brush some hair out of your face and your heart clenched at that gesture. "Did it work?"
"What?"
"Forgetting him?"
"The alcohol? No." It was definitely not the alcohol that helped you forget him, but the person standing in front of you. You thought he understood what he meant when his hand came up again to brush that same strand of hair out of your face again, but lingered slowly creeping back to the same place it was nested when you kissed at the bar.
"Want some help?" He suddenly stood very close to you. In the last few minutes he had entered your room enough to push you in and have the door close behind the two of you. And you hadn't even realized. You only had eyes for him. Or his eyes, which sparkled a desire full green. The tension that had been building ever since your fight at the bar almost became unbearable, which is probably what gave him the confidence to ask the question and for you to reply as you did. "Will you let me help you forget that jerk?"
You took the last step needed to stand flush against him and within a second your lips were on his. This kiss may have started out as passionately as the one at the bar but it quickly grew into something hotter.
Mat pushed you further into the room until you stumbled into the dresser onto which he lifted you with ease. You legs wrapped around his hips tightly so he had no room to escape, not that he had any plans to do so as his tongue licked into your mouth. You couldn't hold back a moan as Mat devoured your mouth like he couldn't get enough of you, your fingers digging into his soft brown hair.
You kissed for endless minutes, but when Mat eventually pulled away, your chest heaved, lungs pulling in much-needed oxygen. He breathed harshly, his mouth not retreating too far so you could feel him breathing against your lips. He nibbled on your lower lip, the feel of his teeth sinking into your swollen flesh making you moan softly. "Such pretty sounds," he mumbled in between teasing bites. "All for me?"
"Mhm," you whimpered, nudging your lips closer to his, desperate for his touch. He chuckled, but couldn't help but kiss you back, him too needy to feel this passion again.
More kisses, moans, and whimpers passed until you slowly inched your hips to the edge of the dresser until you finally met his. A deep groan rumbled through Mat's body upon contact and with his big hands he placed on your ass he pulled you even closer, rubbing his growing bulge against your quickly heating center. The layer of both of your jeans got in the way of the best possible friction and both of you realized that the clothes issue needed to be solved as fast as possible.
His mouth broke from yours to explore your jawline and neck. Just as your hands moved from his hair to open up his jeans, one of his hands moved to pull you v-neck down one shoulder, exposing more skin. Small moans climbed up your throat as his tongue started nibbling and licking your skin. "Mat," his name was barely a whisper, but he heard it and picked up on the plea to speed things up. He stepped away just enough so you could comfortably take off your sweater and bra in which time he pulled his pants down.
You didn't have a lot of time to react to the sight of his erect cock straining his underwear that already looked too tight from his thick thighs before Mat stepped back into you capturing your lips for another intoxicating kiss. You arched your back when his grabby hands got ahold of your breast, massaging it and rubbing your nipple between his fingers.
"Do you feel what you're doing to me? How could you ever think I hated you?," he asked out of breath as he continued to rub his hard cock over your center.
"Well, there is the time you-"
"Let's not get into this now, eh?" You laughed, but agreed since what he was doing to you felt way too good to stop. "But let's get you out of the pants and onto this extremely comfortable bed."
With that, he lifted you in the air walking you over to the bed and throwing you onto the mattress. Before dropping to his knees with a mischievous grin, he tore his sweater off then got to work on tearing your jeans off as well.
"God, I have been waiting to get my hands on you since the moment you first looked at me," he groaned as if he couldn't believe this moment was real.
"Then why-"
"Shush, I wasn't being mean to you," he interrupted.
"I was going to say, then why are you talking so long to take me?" The right corner of his lips curled up and his eyes darkened before finally also taking your panties off and grabbing you by your ass pulling you to the edge of the bed.
"Oh, honey, you're so wet" Mat rumbled, his fingers exploring your drenched folds, spreading you open for him while you trembled. "And who are you dripping for?"
"You." The word only a whisper.
"No one else on your mind?"
"No," you moaned bucking your hips into his touch. "Just you."
"That's right." He finally circled your clit, dragging a strangled moan from your mouth, before spanking the little bundle of nerves, making you jerk and cry out. "So sensitive and responsive," he murmured. "I've dreamed about your pussy—and it's even better than I imagined," he confessed distractedly before ducking down, wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking until you were squirming beneath him so badly, he had to pin you down to the bed.
Pleasure washed through you in waves so overwhelming, your hands grabbed Mat's soft hair to keep yourself steady. Your whole body quaked, your hips bucking up against his face while he sucked your clit into his mouth, his tongue teasing the tip of it until you felt like you were going to shatter apart. But he wouldn't let you come so fast and continued teasing you. Mat licked at your pussy, his tongue digging into the depths of your hole as far as he could go, before using the tip of his tongue to tease your clit.
"Oh, god! Mathew," you moans grew louder at the sounds of him eating you out, something you ex never liked to do (not that you were thinking about him at all), and the thoughts of how hopefully he'd be fucking you numb in just a few minutes. If he was that good at foreplay, how good was he at the actual fucking part?
Just when you thought he couldn't get any better, he ripped his head out of your grasp and lightly slapped your clit, making you cry out. "So sweet," he mumbled, admiring your pussy again after having a taste. His fingers explored the sensitive tissue again before sinking one and then another finger into you. You moaned and squirmed, grabbing the sheets for some support.
"That's it. I can feel you squeezing me, you're close, eh?" You could only hum in response, still squirming beneath his touch. "Then come for me, honey."
Mat's fingers worked in and out of your hole slowly, dragging against your sensitive walls like he was reveling in how tight you were. His tongue brushed against your clit, making you moan and whine, the pleasure he offered so exquisite, you felt certain you were going to come soon. When his fingers pressed against that spot inside you, you abruptly screamed as you finally came. Your hands clutched the sheets then captured his hair again as you bucked your hips up violently against his face, his mouth never relenting even as your entire world shattered around you. His kept fucking you with his fingers, his mouth sucking on your puffy clit as pleasure coursed through you in wave after overwhelming wave. Your legs shook on either side of his head, the rest of your body trembling while Mat worked you through your orgasm.
Then, when the pleasure began to subside, Mat didn't relent. His fingers were still plunging in and out of your pussy while he licked furiously at your sensitive clit. You squirmed, whining at the overstimulation, but he only raised his head for a moment to stare up your body at you.
"One more," he rasped, pressing a kiss to your clit. "Gimme another one, honey," he said, greedy hunger in his voice. Then he spoke no more because his mouth was busy eating you out like a starved man. When he added a third finger to your cunt, fucking you harder with his fingers curled inside you, pressing against that spot, you felt the tension coiling inside you again. Mat was relentless, his tongue lashing against your clit, and it wasn't long before you came again.
If you'd thought your body had trembled and shook through your first release, it was nothing compared to the quaking shudders of your second orgasm. You screamed your throat raw at the overwhelming pleasure consuming your body and mind, and all you could do was hold onto his head and ride it out with him.
When you finally started to come down, you saw him licking your arousal from his fingers, his green eyes heated when he caught you staring at him. He smirked at your slumped, limp body and began to rise. He climbed on top of the mattress, pulling up with him, so your entire body now lay next to him.
"Gimme a minute," you huffed, still catching your breath, to which he chuckled.
"Take your time." With one hand under his head, he grinned at the ceiling. What he was saying earlier was the truth. He did like you and cared for you. He pinned for you and lusted after you. He just couldn't express that in the workplace and that somehow turned into passive aggressiveness. But he would apologize for that later. For now, he was just happy that after months of fantasizing you were actually lying in bed next to him.
"Thank you," you finally said waving your hand around. "For that."
Another laugh, one that made your heart skip a beat, left his mouth. "You sound like it was your first time being eaten out. And you're welcome."
When you didn't answer, only cringed, he sat himself up on his elbow looking down at you. You were strangely comfortable with being naked around him. With past boyfriends or hookups, you always quickly found something to cover up with. "How long were you with this jerk?"
"A few years."
"And he never once went down on you?" His perplexed face suddenly made you feel ashamed. Not about yourself but that you kept up with your ex for so long.
"Not never. He just didn't like doing it. And I haven't enjoyed it with others either so it wasn't a big deal," you admitted, though after what you just went through, you might have some reevaluating to do.
"Jesus Christ, (y/n)! You wasted your time with him. He should have been at your feet, worshipping you, thanking whatever god he believes in that you even looked at him let alone touch him. You especially deserve so much better." Your heart clenched and that fuzzy warm feeling in your belly returned. Since you had no idea how to respond, you kissed him. First softly, almost hesitant, but that feeling only grew stronger and within a few minutes you had pushed him back into the mattress and climbed on top of him.
You moaned into Mat's mouth, kissing him harder, your drenched center settling over the bulge in his pants. Your breath hitched in your throat and Mat took the opportunity to nip at your lower lip, making you moan again before you began rocking against his hardness. Renewed arousal flooded through your body, your skin heating while you kissed him until it became too much and you had to wrench your lips away from the handsome hockey player so you could gasp for air.
"Mathew," you cried softly, his name falling from your mouth in a whispered plea while your hips kept grinding down on his cock. He felt so big and thick beneath you and you didn't know what you wanted more, to keep grinding down against him or feel him fill you up.
Mat pressed his smile against your jaw, teasing your skin with kisses and little nips of his teeth, making you gasp and moan and clench down around nothing while you worked your pussy against his bulge.
"My mouth not enough for you, honey?" he rumbled teasingly in your ear, his hands sliding down your sides. He grabbed your ass with his big hands, kneading your soft flesh while helping you rock against him, dragging more moans from you. "Do you need my cock?"
"Yes, yes, please," you begged in a whining voice. Your pulse was thrumming beneath your skin and throbbing in your clit. Your hands pressed into the mattress next to his head and you used your grip as leverage to grind down harder on his bulge, pressing your clit against the fabric of his boxers until you were a whimpering mess. "Need it, please!"
"What do you need?," he whispered roughly.
"Your cock."
"Say my name. Who's making you feel like this?" His voice was rough in your ear sending more shivers down your body and directly to your clit.
"Mathew. You, Mat. Please, I need you."
His hands on your ass moved quickly to lift you to your knees just high enough so he could wiggle out of his underwear.
"Condom?," you whispered quickly before anything further progressed. His head dropped back in agony before he cursed. "Fuck."
Your head dropped to his chest, spinning as you considered the sides of the argument. "Sorry, I didn't actually plan on anything happening anytime soon."
"It's okay," you whispered, then kissed your way up his neck to his lips. "It's ok, we don't need one. I'm clean and on the pill."
"Me too. You sure?," he asked breathlessly in between more intoxicating kisses. "We don't need to do anything tonight."
"No, please, Mathew," you begged, lowering your hips onto his cock, sliding up and down his length. "I need you, please."
"Fuck! I would never say no to you, honey." Mat's gaze darkened before your eyes, a sound rumbling deep in his chest almost like a possessive growl. Then he was diving forward, capturing your lips in a searing kiss while his hands went back to your ass. He used his arm around your back to lower you down until the tip of his cock brushed against your dripping folds. "I'm gonna fuck your sweet pussy bare," he promised, bullying your clit with his tip until you were moaning and squirming on top of him. "I'm gonna fill you up with my come until it's dripping down your thighs."
Words escaped you, so you nodded your head, which felt light and fuzzy with how aroused you were. Your hands braced on Mat's shoulders and you stared deep into his eyes as he guided you to start sinking down on his cock. You gasped when you felt the head of his cock press inside your tight hole. You moaned when he was buried all the way inside of you, loving the feeling of his thick cock splitting you open, stretching out your little pussy. It was nearly overwhelming, just how much you had to stretch to accommodate him, but you enjoyed it too much to stop or protest. "So big," was all you could mumble, your lashes fluttering as you tried to keep holding his gaze through the feeling of his hardness stretching your inner walls.
Mat rumbled a pleased sound in his chest. "Ya like it, honey?" he asked, his lips curling in a devilish smirk that made you want to kiss his mouth hard. "Like feeling my big, fat cock splitting open your tight cunt?"
"Oh god, oh god," you mumbled, moaning while you slid down more of his length before lifting up and pressing down even further. "Feels so good—s'good, Mat," you muttered, still holding his gaze even as your eyes threatened to close from the overwhelming pleasure.
The moment felt too intimate to cut off the connection of your held gaze, so you stared into Mat's eyes as you worked yourself up and down his shaft, taking him impossibly deeper.
"F-fuck, oh fuck," Mat groaned, finally breaking eye contact to bury his face against your chest, like he was overwhelmed by the feeling of being buried inside you. His breath was hot against your breasts as he sucked in deep gulps of air, breathing in your scent while his hands gripped your hips so hard, you thought he might leave fingertip-shaped bruises on your hips—not that you minded. You shivered and clenched around his stiff cock, which only made him grunt in pleasure. "Feel so fucking good, honey," he rumbled, his voice muffled where it was pressed to your sternum. "So warm and tight and fucking perfect around my cock."
"Mhmm," you murmured, rocking your hips in small movements, feeling his cock drag against your sensitive inner walls. You were pressed so close together, you felt a shudder pass through Mat's body and continue through yours. It wasn't long before you were both writhing together, reveling in the feel of each other. "Feel so full—so full of your big cock, Mat," you said in a breathy whisper. You raked your nails through his hair, as he held you to your chest as your hips moved against his tiny thrusts.
"That's right, full of me," he mumbled possessively, nipping at your neck, moving back down to your breasts. He kissed your soft mounds while you rocked on top of him, his hands bringing you down harder and harder on his cock. Steve sucked on your nipple, lapping at the tight peak before giving the same attention to the other. "You feel better than I ever dreamed, honey," he rasped, looking up and catching your eye, depthless emotion filling his green eyes.
Shy heat filled your face and you smiled, warm pleasure curling through your limbs and pulsing insistently between your thighs. Your inner walls clenched down around Mat's cock, like your body was possessive of the feeling of him inside you and never wanted to let him go.
"I'm sorry," he whispered against your ear, pressing small wet kissed along your jaw. "Sorry I've been a bit of a jerk."
"So you admit it?" Your response sped up his thrusts to which you let out a surprised squeak which turned into a string of moans.
"Why don't you accept my apology for now and let me fuck you mindless like you deserve and we can talk about the rest later." His voice turned rough and possessive again, one you already loved as you pussy clamped down on his cock, so you nodded.
In a quick maneuver, Mat had turned the two of you around, lifting one of your legs. "Good girl."
He didn't give you a chance to react before he mercilessly started pounding into your sweet flesh. It was better than you ever could've imagined, the feeling of his hot, hard cock sinking into your tight cunt. His hips were smacking your thighs, his balls slapping against your ass with every thrust as he fucked you. You reveled in the feel of him, your arms and legs wrapped around him and dragging him deeper into the cradle of your body.
Mat's face hovered above you and you could see the way it was contorted with pleasure. The way he was fucking you—so possessively, you knew he was serious when he'd told you he had liked you all along. "Fuck," he choked out the whispered curse, pressing his forehead to yours. "Your pussy feels so fucking good gripping my cock."
You tilted your head up for a kiss, pressing your lips to his as you pulled him closer with your legs, rocking up against him. "More, please—need you, need more," you begged against his mouth, your breaths mingling until you didn't know where you ended and he began.
Giving you what you asked for, Mat pulled his hips back, dragging his cock along every sensitive inch of your cunt, before slamming back inside. His breathing was harsh in your ear as he let out stuttering moans, almost drowning out the sounds of his hips smacking against yours, his balls hitting your ass. "So good, so good, honey, so fucking good," he chanted against your check, his breath hot on your face.
Your face pressed into his neck, lips sucking on his skin until you knew you were going to leave marks, too far gone to care as your tongue darted out to taste him and soothe him. Your legs locked around his waist, your feet hooking behind his thighs so you could draw him deeper until he was fully seated in your cunt and he couldn't pull out more than an inch.
"Oh god, that's it. I'm so close," you mumbled as his thrust slowed but doubled in strength. Words escaped you, your lips forgetting how to do anything but kiss and moan and whimper and whine for Mat. Your head felt hazy, however not from the alcohol from earlier, but on Mat's cock and the dirty words pouring from his mouth.
"Yes, need you to come for me, honey. Need to feel you come on my cock," he muttered, picking up the pace of his slow grinding until he was rutting into you as much as your legs would let him. "Fuck, I can't stop, baby, 'm gonna come." He grunted and groaned, the sounds of his pleasure and his words filling the truck cab. "Come on my cock, baby," Mat rasped as he pounded his cock deep in your hole, grinding his pubic bone against your clit with every thrust, sending you careening toward the edge.
The desperation in Mat's voice and the way his cock pummeled a spot deep in your pussy that had your back arching into him, grinding your clit on him, pushed you over the edge. Your nails dug into his back, desperate to be anchored to him as it felt like you were free-falling through pleasure. Pressing your face into his neck, you muffled a scream, sobbing your release as your cunt rhythmically clamped down hard on his cock.
"Oh fuck, oh fuck, that's it baby, that's a good girl," Mat praised, rutting into you harder, fucking you through your orgasm as he chased his own.
His fingers dug into your soft flesh so hard you were sure he'd leave bruises and that thought only sent more warmth curling through you, joining the aftershocks of your orgasm. "Please," you begged, your mouth finally remembering how to form words. "Come in me," you whined, squirming beneath him.
"Fuck—yes," he grunted, thrusting hard and pinning you down onto the mattress with his hips. "Take it, honey, take my come," he bit out through gritted teeth as you felt him start to come deep in your pussy. You moaned when you felt his cock twitch inside you, his come filling your warm hole. He panted, as he thrust a few more times, shallowly, until he was spent. Mat collapsed on top of you while you reveled in the feel of his come coating inside you. "So good for me, baby," he praised, turning his head enough to kiss your cheek.
Your arms and legs felt heavy and loose as your full body relaxed, drifting in the aftermath of a mind-blowing orgasm, feeling sated and happy. Running your fingers through Mat's hair, you hummed in happiness. Unable to stop yourself, you planted little kisses on his neck. He made a contented sound in his chest in response, his thumb sweeping over the back of your hand.
He still stayed buried deep inside you, brushing his lips over your face, your neck and collarbones. You enjoyed it, almost more than what you just did, breathing him in, staying in your fantasy just a little bit longer.
You suddenly snapped back to reality, realizing that while he had just been very sweat and caring, he did behave like a jerk these last few months. You pushed him off of you, pretending you didn't feel the extreme emptiness when his cock slipped out of you. "Get off me."
Mat laughed, sitting up on his elbows as he watched you scramble to find a shirt to cover up with. "Oh, come on, honey. Can't we enjoy this moment?"
"One phenomenal orgasm does just erase these last few months and prove that you actually never hated me," you explained in a snippy tone, blushing when you realized you admitted how good he'd made you feel.
"I'm pretty sure I made you come three times." You rolled your eyes, throwing his sweater at him before finally reaching your sweater and pulling it over your head. "Should I prove it to you again?"
Let's just say that that night and many other nights he continued to prove to you over and over again that he did in fact like you. Maybe even more than like.
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sc0tters · 4 months
Text
The Bet - Mat Barzal
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summary: when Mat agrees to participating in no nut November, he didn’t think you would be his biggest problem.
request: yes/no
warnings: sexual themes, p in v, fingering, minor spanking, small use of degradation.
word count: 3.49k
authors note: this was so much fun to write! Literally loved every second of this. Reader was a little bit of a shit but we love her for it.
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When the boys came up with it Mat didn’t think you would care about it.
All it was meant to be was a fun way to do some team bonding, of course the team were participating in No Nut November. When Mat agreed he failed to remember that you had been in Germany working for the last three weeks and getting to use FaceTime and the sound of his voice made only got you so far.
So when you arrived back in New York with the message that he needed to see you it filled your mind with desire as your thoughts made your panties grow slick “hi Matty.” You smiled dropping your suitcase on the floor as Mat came to hug you.
The two of you were in the same apartment building and that’s how you met. Getting stuck in the elevator with a cute guy who lived on your floor meant you were going to make a friend. As the rents raised in the building making the place out of your budget, Mat offered the spare room in his place to you making you his roommate. Eventually one thing moved to another and then you ended up in his bed.
It was quick to become a reoccurring theme for the two of you and quickly your exclusively non exclusive relationship started “we can’t.” Mat sighed feeling your lips nip at the skin on his neck.
He wanted to let himself go as the hockey player missed feeling your touch, but as it was only the third of November Mat knew he had to remain strong even if it was only for a few more days “you okay?” You frowned furrowing your eyebrows as you pulled away.
The Canadian scratched his fingers on the back of his neck “boys thought it would be a good idea if we did No Nut-” Mat didn’t need to finish his words for you to let out a gasp “Mat!” You whined letting your lips form a pout.
Your body hurt as it longed for Mat’s touch, even willing to settle on his tongue or his fingers when you do badly wanted his cock “it’s just a month.” Mat reminded you as he grabbed your hands “we can make it through I promise.” He leaned forward to peck your lips.
Part of you tried to respect Mat and behave as you honestly thought that he was kidding, but as the seventh rolled around and Mat still avoided your bed, you succumbed to the truth.
However you were determined and that’s how you landed up on his couch in nothing more than his jersey “woah.” Mat felt his throat go dry as he caught you in the middle of eating a bowl of ice cream “how was practice?” You smiled dipping your spoon back into the bowl before your brought more ice cream to your lips.
Mat had a shaky walk over to you as he watched you reposition your legs so that he could see you were only wearing your panties beneath the jersey “it was um really good.” The Canadian coughed “are you sure it was hard?” A gasp left your lips as the cold melting ice cream fell onto your chin.
Your eyes sparkled as Mat’s locked with yours “I’m such a klutz.” You giggled using your finger to wipe the liquid from your chin before you wrapped your lips around it letting your tongue swirl around your digit “I’ll be in the shower!” Mat announced pressing his hands against his thighs as he got up and sped walked to his bedroom.
By the middle of the month you had looked to everything other option you had that wasn’t involving Mat. Each night the sound of your moans could be heard from your bedroom as your vibrator became your best friend. The way you’d gasp and whimper as you grew closer to your high and there was nothing Mat could do about it killed him.
So the time he was forced to spend away from you on the Islanders roadie did the remaining participants a load of good as they forgot about their partners. Yet the moment the door to the apartment opened and he was met with the sounds of your whimpers Mat was thrown right back into the bet “m-m-Mat.” You gasped as you pressed your vibrator against your clit as it brushed over the fabric of your panties.
You were in his favourite lingerie set, orange panties with a blue bra. It was a set that you surprised him in after he scored an overtime winning goal. Mat let his hand grip at your doorframe “please Mat.” You looked your eyes with him as he walked into your room not letting his eyes leave yours.
He crawled onto you bed wanting to take his mind off of the loss against the Canucks “let me make you feel good baby.” Mat pleaded wrapping his hand on yours as he guided the vibrator over your clit “let’s do this properly.” He proposed using his free hand to move your panties to the side “fucking missed you.” The Canadian kissed your lips as you moaned feeling the vibrator send shivers up your spine “missed this.” You agreed feeling the bliss bring you away like you were falling away from this all.
Your eyes screwed shut as your legs began to shake causing your heels to dig into the mattress beneath you “more.” Your hand reached down to cup Mat’s bulge in his jeans.
As your hand brushed over the fabric it caused his eyes to go wide. Within seconds Mat stopped the vibrator and set it on the mattress as he retracted himself from your bed “Mat?” You propped yourself on your elbows as you gasped watching him compose himself “I need a shower.” Mat announced running his hand over his face before he ran out of your room.
It had been another three days since that and you had decided to change your game plan “hey Mat.” You smiled as he was cooking dinner “how was your day?” He asked as you wrapped your hands around his torso.
You nuzzled your face in his neck causing him to smile “you tired pretty girl?” The pet name made your legs rub together “been thinking about you.” Mats hand clenched around the spatula as your breath fanned the shell of his ear “how big you are.” Your hand traced over his bulge as you gave it a squeeze.
As Mat remained still you continued to to try your luck “I know you want this baby.” You cooed continuing your actions as you moved your hand to slip into his boxers.
His cock throbbed in your hand “please.” Mat begged so close to accepting defeat as his eyes screwed shut.
It felt like your victory lap as you turned his head to help you kiss his lips “want me to suck you off?” Your voice was soft as you watched him nod “want to put it in your mouth.” Mat nodded watching you drop to your knees to the side of him as he turned his body to face you “please don’t tease me.” The hockey player saw how his erection stuck out as he was probably close to coming already.
When the string of saliva left your lips to coat his cock an alarm went off, most probably one for the thing in the pot that he was cooking “we can’t.” Mat was quick to shake his bad helping his wet cock back into his boxers that he protected with his shorts.
As you got up wanting to whine at him about it Mat instead pecked your lips “it’s just a few more days left baby.” He mumbled watching as you walked off to the where your bedroom was your door shut with a slam. Maybe you shouldn’t have cared that he was doing this, the cause should have warmed your heart. But instead as you had built up a reliance on Mat to help you come, you realised nobody did it better than him.
And for that and no matter how hard you tried, you simply couldn’t come.
So that was how you landed up at the teams mini party at a bar with a plan. As you complained to your friends about your predicament they reminded you of one key factor, you and Mat weren’t dating.
At the end of the day as much as you had a crush on him he wasn’t your boyfriend and you knew that there was someone on the team who did have a crush on you. That was how you ended up stood next to Pierre most of the night.
His touch was harsh but you figured if you couldn’t make Mat jealous enough for him to fuck you then you’d accept defeat. Mat was a good sport and tried to play along with it all for a bit biting his tongue whenever you’d laugh at the clearly not funny comments that Pierre made.
The Canadian was also struggling at this point in the month and you wearing his favourite dress truly didn’t help how his pants felt tonight. Mat knew you were trying to push his buttons as he’d catch your gaze every time you ran your fingers down Pierre’s arm, it was what you did for Mat.
But when he watched his teammate place on the curve of your ass the hockey player could no longer keep his mouth shut “Pierre I think Matt wanted to talk to you.” Mat lied through his teeth as he smiled like the Cheshire Cat “thanks bro.” Pierre nodding not picking up on it in the same way that you did “we can do this two ways.” Mat began the moment the older boy left you.
His eyes were already undressing you as they started at the loose collar line of your dress, Mat knew you hated wearing a bra “I take you into the bathroom or we go home and I don’t let you come even after November is over.” His warning sent shivers down your spine “what about the bet?” You stammered over your words as he laughed.
He ran his finger over the outline of your lips “I’m done playing good boy whilst you go around like this.” Mat explained leaning down to kiss the side of your lips making sure to miss where you wanted him “if you want to be fucked like a slut I’ll treat you like one too.” The irritation in his voice made you feel lightheaded as your panties grew wet “p-please Mat.”
You croaked out allowing your lips to form a pout.
It made Mat let out a laugh “maybe I should be leaving you here because it doesn’t seem you want this.” Fear went through your as your eyes widened “show me you do baby.” Mat mumbled as you took his hand and practically dragged him off to the bathrooms “look at how desperate my little baby is for my cock.” He teased as the door locked behind you both.
His hand rubbed your face as he pressed you against the counter “please Mat.” You begged puckering your lips as you tried to kiss him but as his hockey reaction times kicked in he instead dodged your attempts “maybe I should just go kiss Pierr-” Mat didn’t let you finish your sentence as his lips were forced onto yours.
You took a mere second to start kissing him back “fuck.” Your words were muffled as Mat pinched his fingers at the skin of your ass when he bunched up your dress around your hips “the way you fucking act I wouldn’t even be in here with you.” Mat grunted pressing his lips against your neck as he nipped at the skin.
The Canadian watched as your eyes fluttered as his hands cupped your breasts with the only thing between you and his hands was the fabric of your dress “but you’re too needy tonight to let me do that aren’t you?” The hockey player retracted himself from you as he was met with your silence “asked you a question.” Mat locked his hand around your jaw squeezing the skin of your chin.
A long whimper came from your lips “need you so much Mat.” You groaned trying to shift your hips towards the hockey player “but you’ve been acting like a brat.” Mat pulled you off of the counter as he spun you around. Your lips were swollen as you started at the two of you in the mirror “look at these little panties too.” The hockey player let out a dry laugh fiddling with the lace material of the white thong you wore.
He massaged the skin on your ass before he raised his hand to it slap the area “fuck!” You jumped feeling him squeeze the sore area of skin “you like that pretty girl?” Mat cooed kissing your neck as he repeated his actions “think the club wants to hear your noises baby.” The hockey player smiled as he brought his hand to cup your pussy.
It made you gasp as you pushed yourself up “god you’re soaked.” He clicked his tongue moving his fingers around the material so that he could tease your clit “please Mat.” You begged him as your body began to relax as his movements continued at the slow pace.
You whimpered feeling his fingers run down your slit before they thrusted into your cunt, his palm pressed against your clit “you’re so fucking good to me.” You croaked letting your head drop against his shoulder “I know baby.” Mat kissed your temple when your cunt clenched around his fingers.
He watched you gasp as your jaw went slack “god you don’t know how much I’ve been thinking about this pussy this month.” The Canadians words made you moan “thought about waking you up so many times during the night just by shoving my dick in to this hole.” You whined feeling his breath against your neck.
The hockey player smirked seeing how you watched the mirror “you’d like that wouldn’t you?” He asked nipping at your earlobe “waking up full of my load as it’s trapped inside of you.” Mat wasn’t usually possessive but tonight unlocked a whole new side of him “want that Mat.” You begged reaching forward to grip at the sink in an attempt to avoid how quickly your orgasm was approaching.
At that point Mat could feel his cock pressing against the fabric of his jeans “I’m gonna fuck you now.” He announced removing his hand from your panties as it caused to you whine “I’ll give you what you want in a second.” Mat rolled his eyes as he slotted his fingers into your mouth “taste yourself f’me.” Watching you swirl you tongue around his digits like it was his cock felt like you were teasing him.
It made him reach back down to your panties as he pushed them down “can’t wait to fuck you.” Your hands helped bunch your dress around your waist as you stepped out of your panties “don’t make me wait.” You begged feeling your legs ache with anticipation as the sound of him undoing his belt echoed in your ears “you’ll take it when I fucking give it to you.” Mat spat as his fingers dug into your hip.
Mat wrapped his hand around his cock pumping it a few times as he licked his lips “‘m sorry.” You apologised turning to lock eyes with him “I know you are.” The hockey player sighed bringing his cock to tease your clit “that’s why you’re gonna be a good girl and take it.” Mat ordered thrusting his cock onto your cunt as your head fell forward.
He smiled as you weren’t given any time to adjust to his cock “god you’re so tight.” The Canadian grunted as he kissed the back of your neck “you been missing this cock?” Mat asked as you moaned reaching up to pull the sleeves of your dress down so that you could pull at your nipples.
You moaned as his cock pumped into you “fuck yeah.” Your fingers tugged at your sensitive nubs “so big.” You blurted out as his fingers went to rub your clit “keep making those pretty noises for me baby.” Mat mumbled kissed your neck.
The hockey player watched in the mirror as his cock bottomed you out “don’t stop Mat.” You pleaded as you began forcing yourself back against his cock “to think I actually gave this cunt up for a month.” Mat laughed at his words as he clicked his tongue.
Your brain went foggy as not a single coherent thought formed in it “see why you tried so fucking hard.” You whimpered as he used his free hand to bring your back flat against his torso “‘m not an idiot.” You pointed out causing him to laugh “you forgetting that you went to Pierre?” Mat shot back as your teeth caught your lip as you held back a moan.
Mat tsked as his eyes caught your action “want to hear you baby.” He muttered into your ear as his hand squeezed around your throat “let him know just who is making you feel this good.” He hinted to the boy you had been stuck to your side the entire night “you jealous?” You teased with a smirk as you squeezed your hand around his causing the wrap he had go tighter.
The room felt hot as the sound of skin slapping echoed off of the walls “look at the mirror.” Mat barked making you look up at the glass causing him to look back at you “it’s my cock that’s fucking you.” He explained kissing your head “I’m the one who owns this cunt.” The hockey player spat making you moan.
You felt yourself grow close “all yours Matty.” You nodded as you let out a cry “I’m gonna come.” Tears formed in your eyes as your legs began to shake again “let it go baby.” Mat nodded giving you the green light to come.
It was hot as your cunt clenched around his cock as Mat fucked you through your orgasm “my pretty little girl.” He cooked quickly pulling himself out so that he could flip you over pushing you onto the counter “Ma-” you gasped feeling him thrust into you again.
Mat pushed his hand against the mirror above you “I’m not stopping until I come.” He explained making you moan “please.” Your voice was shaky as you felt your eyes roll back when his hand found its way back to your clit “god I’ve just given you one and now you want more?” Mat smirked as you tried to kiss him “I need you Mat.” You moaned using your energy to lock your hands behind his neck pulling him close to you.
He felt his cock throb as his movements became staggered “I’m close.” You hadn’t come down from your first orgasm and it left you close to a second “hold it.” Mat snapped quickening his movements on your clit causing your cunt to clamp around his cock.
Your throat felt raw as you whined “don’t push your luck baby.” The hockey player warned you “keep squeezing my cock like that.” As you tilted your hips to meet his it resulted in both of you moaning.
Mat kissed your lips to hold in his moan “Mat!” You huffed as your body shook “let it go baby.” He grunted as your second orgasm trigger his first of the night.
As his warm ropes shot into your cunt you tried to push him away as he slowly kept his hips moving “just making sure my come stays in you.” Mat smiled pecking your lips as he pulled out allowing you up. You reached for your panties on the floor but he was quicker “you aren’t going to need these tonight.” The hockey player explained shoving them into the pocket of his pants before he continued getting ready to go back out.
You two had gotten out of the bar unseen and as you got in the car you thought you finally had the chance to breathe “you look real fucking pretty tonight.” Mat smiled as his hand moved up your thigh “just tonight?” A smirk was quick to fall from your face as his fingers touched the lips of your cunt “Mat.” Your voice grew shaky feeling his fingers tease your slit.
The car came to a red light “just making sure you stay ready for when we get back home.” Mat smirked as he kissed your lips “no coming until we get home.” His words made you grow sick with fear as his fingers formed a scissoring motion in your cunt.
“You couldn’t have thought I’d let you get away with that behaviour all month, now could you?”
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drewsbuzzcut · 2 months
Text
Champion In The Bed
mat barzal x model!fem!reader
a visceral in doses fic
warnings: SMUT SMUT SMUT (very little spanking, teasing, and slightly edited) let me know if I missed anything
takes place February 2024
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You follow Mat’s gaze as you’re sitting, straddling his lap and leaning back on your hands. He ogles your jersey and backwards cap clad form, and it’s not just any jersey, it’s his all star skills jersey. The material hangs off your body as it’s too big for you, but it does a nice job at hiding your black lingerie. His eyes pick up on the way you come off shy, but your fingers fiddling with his happy trail tells him otherwise. His hands rub your thighs and he subtly goes higher until they’re hidden under the jersey. Your body breaks out in chills just from his touch alone.
Everything feels like it’s in slow motion. It’s obvious that it’s Mat’s goal to tease you until you’re at your wits end. You attempt remaining stoic so he doesn’t know just how bad you want him, but each time he licks his lips or lets his eyes dip down to your covered up cunt, you feel your resolve start to disappear. It doesn’t help that he’s completely naked underneath you. His length stands at attention, waiting to be touched by you.
“Maty,” you whisper and softly adjust yourself so you’re leaning in closer to him.
“What, pretty girl?” He tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear after pulling his cap off your head, and you so badly want to suck his fingers into your mouth.
“I’m so proud of you. My hotshot, hockey boyfriend who is an all star. Fuck the skills comp, at least you can get me to cum. Plus, you looked so sexy in your jersey,” you whisper the praise in his ear, nipping at the lobe to get a small moan out of him.
“Not as sexy as you look in it,” he compliments as the tip of his nose trails along a vein in your neck. Your smooth, sweet perfume consumes him.
“Let me show you how proud I am. Let me ride you,” you plead, letting your lips on his jaw persuade him. You slip his cap back onto his head, backwards of course. He’s the hottest person you’ve ever seen, and it makes you insanely wet, you can feel it pooling in your underwear.
Your hips start to move on top of him, but his hands quickly land on your hips to halt your movements. You let out a disappointed huff that makes him chuckle.
“I thought this was about me?” He tuts and you nod your head in agreement.
“Then you’re going to be my good girl and wait until I’m ready for you to show me just how proud you are,” he chastises with a spank delivered to your ass. You let out a faint moan and throw your head back in frustration. He’s touching you but not enough and not where you need him most.
He lifts the jersey halfway up your torso, fingertips gliding over your soft skin. He unveils your see through, lacy panties. You notice the way his jaw clenched and the way his hands gripped the jersey tighter. He is having a tough time, too.
“As much as I love you wearing my jersey, I prefer you naked,” he grabs your chin, lips encompassing yours.
Your hands press into his chest. The feeling of his strong muscles drives you crazy. He slowly pulls the jersey off of you, watching the way you shiver and the way your nipples grow hard.
“Fuck. Look at you. My girl is so sexy.”
He presses a kiss to your neck and softly sucks on your skin until his mark is left behind. His lips move down to the tops of your breasts while he thumbs at your nipples over your lacy bra. You subconsciously arch into his touch, getting him to unclasp your bra expertly with one hand. He sends you a cocky smirk and a wink, and if you weren’t already soaked, that’d probably do the trick.
His thumbs tuck into the thin straps of your thong before sliding back out. He drags a finger from your bellybutton down to the top of your underwear. Before you can even figure out what he’s doing, Mat rips your thong in half.
“That was brand new,” you gasp.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll buy you a lot more when we get home,” he shushes you.
He fiddles with your “13” pendant on the chain around your neck before he pushes you to lean back like you originally were.
“Baby, please. Let me fuck you, please,” you beg as he starts to fist his cock.
He bites on his lip -something he does when he’s being a tease- and nudges your clit with his angry and leaking tip. You let out the sweetest moan and try to move your hips for some kind of friction. Sadly, he stills your movements and shoots you a warning glare. He suddenly lifts you up, pulling you closer and slipping his length in between your folds.
“C’mon, pretty girl. Make a mess,” he instructs you, guiding your hips back and forth until you start to move on your own.
Your hips start slow, trying to get used to the pleasure of this type of teasing. The more wet you become, the easier it is to grind against his length. Your hands rest on his broad shoulders for support and you let your arousal coat your boyfriend.
Your cunt practically jerks him off without him actually being inside of you, and you make sure to rub your clit against the veins of his shaft. Your pleasure drags out along his girth, moans spilling from the seam of your lips. His eyes are glued to the way you work yourself on him, feeling himself start to pulse. Your sticky slickness is a good look on him.
The look of lust that washes over your features turns him on even more, because he’s the one who’s making you feel this way.
“I think I’m going to cum,” you whisper. The pressure on your clit and the fact that Mat’s letting you make a mess on him drives you fast to an orgasm.
“Not yet,” he says, lifting your body off his lap and placing you on his thigh.
Your body is already thrumming, and your orgasm is lingering in your stomach ready to burst at Mat’s signal. You grind against his thick thigh, the hard muscle stroking your clit just right. He flexes the muscles in his thigh and then relaxes them. The action sends a vibration through you and that electricity drives you to the edge. You're barely holding onto your release, but the sensation is quickly making you crumble. You buck your hips faster and you hear the blood rushing to your ears as you continue to throb on top of him. Your wet cunt contracts around nothing and you so badly want his dick inside of you.
“Please, Maty. I need you. I want you inside of me,” you plead and he quickly hauls you off his thigh and pushes into your pussy in a quick stroke.
Your arms lock around his neck as you bounce on his cock, body on fire with how deep he hits inside of you. Your breasts sway in front of him and he shoves his face between the supple flesh. His mouth ravages your skin until you’re left a whimpering mess.
You rut up against him, screams clawing up your throat each time his tip massages your sweet spot. Your hands grab onto the bill of his cap, pulling it back to make tufts of hair stick out and stick to his forehead.
“Yes! Yes! Oh my god. Right there, baby. Fuck yes,” you let the scream rip through your entire body as heat and tingles start to spread beyond your stomach. You bounce down harder as your pussy continues to take him deeper. His hands grip your ass to try to slow you down, but the way your arousal drips down his shaft makes him lose his sanity.
“You better not cum. I can feel your little pussy squeezing down on me,” he grips your throat and speaks into your mouth as you slant your lips over his.
“I’m gonna cum,” you cry, mouth opening in a loud moan during your wet kiss.
Mat abruptly pulls out of you, ignoring your whimpers as he rises to his knees. He loops his arms under your knees, picking you up so your body is completely under his control. He thrusts back into you, using his grip on your hips to slam you down on him.
“Harder,” you whine, throwing your head back. Your chest heaves and you try to match his thrusts but his grip is too tight. You’ll have delicious fingerprints on the dips of your hips later. You feel your body start to shake, your orgasm looming over you. The way Mat bulges in your stomach drags him to the brink of his orgasm.
“You’re so sexy, baby. My needy girl, you like the way my cock feels deep inside of you?” He questions cockily. He knows you're enjoying it by the way your eyes keep rolling to the back of your head and the way you quiver in his grip.
“Yes, Barzy, yes!” You shout, looking dazedly at your man. His cap sits prettily on his head, his chain bounces with his movements, and the way he glows in sweat makes you dizzy. A new flurry of fire rushes to the tips of your fingers and toes. Your pussy clenches in desire.
“I’m gonna cum,” you cry.
“Cum for me, pretty girl,” he grants your wish, pounding into your boneless body.
Moans spill from his mouth as your warm, slick walls flutter around his cock and your orgasm surges through your body. Your all star looks deep into your eyes as he continues to drill into you until your nonsensical mewls become mixed with his grunts.
“Cum for me, baby,” you rasp.
He pulls out, laying you back on the bed and strokes his cock. His fist moves fast. A red flush blooming on his neck and chest as he feels his balls tighten.
“Yeah, baby. Just like that. My hot ass, all star boyfriend. Just like that, baby. Cum for me,” you spur him on, circling your clit for extra motivation.
“Fuck,” he whimpers as ropes of cum squirt onto your stomach.
You scoop some of his expense with your finger and pop it into your mouth.
“I love you,” he says as you obscenely moan around your digit.
Mat pulls your finger out of your mouth and replaces it with his tongue, making you even more breathless.
“I love you, baby. I’m so proud of you,” you press a chaste kiss to his lips and chest. One hand rests on his back while your other rests on the back of his neck, fiddling with the hair hidden underneath his hat. Your legs tighten around his hips to keep him close.
“Never leave my side,” he requests, tracing the pendant of your necklace.
“Never,” you assure him, combing your fingers through his hair as he cuddles into you, head resting on your chest and a hand placed on your stomach.
There’s nothing that can be compared to this feeling.
a/n: This was written fairly quickly so sorry if it’s all over the place. Enjoy!!
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mendeshoney · 9 months
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don’t tell me you’re my heartbreaker
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Summary: You weren’t expecting Mat to come back to you.
Pairing: mat barzal x f!reader
Word Count: 10,251
Warnings: post breakup, verbal disagreement, angst, make up sex, angst with a happy ending, second chance romance
A/N: happy freaky friday, i have returned lol. thank you to @m00nlightdelights​ for beta reading this and being my hype person, ily<3
Why you had agreed to this, you had no idea.
Even now, sitting here, across from an unsurprisingly empty chair, every instinct, every nerve ending in your body is telling you to run, to flee, to get the fuck out of here and run down the few blocks it would take to get to the train station to get away from all of this.
From this, terrible, horrible, no good, very bad idea. 
You anxiously checked the time on your watch once more, the glaring 6:28 PM letting you know there were exactly two minutes till the agreed time of 6:30 pm, and once that time arrived, you would start the timer for what you were considering a generous fifteen minutes. 
If he wasn’t in this chair across from you at 6:45 pm, sharp, you would give into your body’s response and bolt. 
And then that would be it, right? You’d be able to put everything that had happened into a box sealed with a neat little bow, store it away to be forgotten and move the fuck on.
You could deal with that.
…Right?
You checked your watch again.
6:29 PM.
The waiter comes back to your table, dropping off the two glasses of water, a basket of bread rolls and a little dish of butter, along with the diet coke and glass of wine you’d ordered for yourself, and the whiskey on the rocks you’d ordered for him. 
You really shouldn’t have done it. 
Would it send him the wrong message?
No. you chided yourself. There's nothing wrong with being polite. Be the bigger person.
Besides, if his tastes somehow changed in a month and a half, and if he wanted something else to drink, he could get it himself once he showed up.
If he showed up.
Immediately after the waiter turned his back on you, you reached for your wineglass and took a large gulp, trying to psych yourself up. Trying to remind yourself that despite what you were feeling, you did have the upper hand here. He asked you to be here, and you could leave at any time you wanted.
You checked your watch again as you put your wineglass back down to the table.
6:30 PM.
He gets a generous fifteen minutes and that’s it. You reminded yourself sternly. 
The second the thought formed in your head, the door to the restaurant flew open and your eyes betrayed your attempt to appear nonchalant about all of this, immediately flying to the door and observing as Mat entered in a rush of limbs, pulling the toque off of his head and smoothing a gloved hand over his hair.
You continued to watch, keeping your expression blank as he weaved through the tables and straight for you, plopping down into his seat with a hushed but rushed, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t think traffic would be so crazy, had I known I swear I would’ve taken the subway or an Uber instead of taking my car, and-”
“Breathe,” you say gently, taking in the deepening flush of his cheeks. “It’s fine.”
Mat exhales, taking off his gloves and stuffing them in his jacket pocket, before shrugging it off and letting it hang on his seatback. He ruffles his hair anxiously one more time, then finally, finally looks at you.
Your stomach twists.
Shit.
You were worried about this. You’d managed to get over him - well, about eighty five percent of the way over him, at least - but you were worried that the minute he gave you his full attention, the minute you looked into his eyes, you’d be catapulted back into his orbit and it would be like the last month and a half you’d spent trying to exorcize him, your relationship, and all the memories tied up in between, would have been for nothing.
It’s not all of that quite yet, but your heart starts incessantly hammering against your ribcage anyway, and you fight to keep your expression blank, trying to resist the urge to be launched back into his gravitational pull.
His expression, however, falters, and the instant smile that spreads across his face when you manage to make and maintain eye contact for longer than a second is brilliantly bright. 
“Hi,” Mat breathes. “Sorry I’m late.”
“You’re technically right on time.” You counter, then lower your gaze to the drinks and bread in front of you, trying to look anywhere but at him.
Gorgeous fucker. 
Stupidly beautiful. 
Annoyingly perfect.
His eyeline follows yours, and he frowns for a second, before a look that you can only describe as fond takes over his face. “You ordered for me?”
“Just the drinks,” you clarify. “The waiter said he’d be back to take our orders once you got here.”
“Well,” he says, looking into your eyes, “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
You shrug, not really considering it a big deal and he leans forward, clasping his hands on the table when he says “It really means a lot that you agreed to meet me here.”
You assess him a little, and when you find he’s being sincere, all you can do is nod. There's still a ball of anxiety in the pit of your stomach, and your walls climb all the way up, barricading what’s left of your heart behind its stone barriers, and keeping it close. 
Mat can clearly sense this, can sense you keeping yourself at a distance if the small frown that starts to form on his lips is anything to go by, but it’s gone as quickly as it appeared, and he plows forward. “I know…I know that things didn’t exactly end well, and I wanted to apologize for that. I wanted…I wanted to talk this out. Talk about us.”
You nod again, because he’d said as much when he called you out of the blue this morning, but it’s what he says next that nearly gives you whiplash.
“I want to give this another shot.”
You blink, partially stunned.
That is…not what you expected him to say at all.
When he called, said he’d wanted to talk about everything, you assumed it was for closure, assumed it was so they could maybe finish the half-finished angry conversation you’d been having the day you broke up, when he called it quits out of nowhere and then walked out.
You hadn’t been expecting…this. 
“You…what?” You stutter out. 
He nods, vehement, grabbing a roll and his butter knife, stabbing a little ball of butter on the end of it and going about buttering a roll for you and then himself - a habit of his now, you’re sure - like this is all completely normal.
“Yeah,” Mat says, gaining confidence with each word he speaks. “I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said that day. About what you’d been trying to tell me this whole time, and you’re right. I wasn’t exactly the best boyfriend to you. I didn’t put you first, I took advantage of you, got scared, and when it mattered most to you, I couldn’t give you what you needed, but that’s not true anymore.”
He puts the roll on the little plate in front of you, then goes about making his own, continuing on like you’re not sitting there gaping at him. “I know I said a lot of things. A lot of awful things, no, horrible things, things that I didn’t mean. And I know I can never take it back, but I hope I can at least…try to make things better?”
Watching you, Mat takes a moment, gauges your reaction. You realize he’s waiting for you to say something, but the only thing you can manage is a small “huh.”
He swallows. “I uh, I know there's a lot to unpack, and I know I have a lot to explain to you, but I wanted to at least put all my cards on the table as to where I’m coming from.”
It’s all too much, and you feel like your body malfunctions a bit, your hands coming up to stop him from speaking any further. “I’m sorry…I just, I need a second to process.”
He closes his mouth, nodding, watching you closely, eyes getting a little wide as you grab your wine glass again to take another large gulp, nearly draining it before reaching for your buttered roll and taking a bite to try to calm your nerves. You both sit there, Mat watching you, and when you finish the roll after a couple of minutes and you manage to gather some semblance of sanity, you hesitantly meet his gaze.
“I don’t understand.” You say. “You…want to get back together?”
“Yeah,” he says, a little sheepish now. “I would like that.” When you don’t answer, or return his smile, it drops a little, only reaching the corners of his mouth. “Unless…unless you don’t want that?”
You grab your wineglass again, downing the last of it and trying to gather all of your thoughts.
There was…definitely a lot to unpack there.
You certainly hadn’t been prepared to discuss…getting back together with him. Even though there was a space in your still recovering heart that desperately ached for the prospect to be with him again, to go back to that little slice of paradise the two of you had managed to carve out for yourselves in the dreary winter of last year. 
To go back to spending snowy days cuddled up together in his bed, to return to your spring outings in the many parks New York had to offer, to go back to Summer with him in Vancouver and spending days at the lake, spend fall with him cozied up with warm cups of coffee or hot chocolate or spiked cider.
But that was…gone now. 
You’d worked hard in the last month and a half to convince yourself that this, him and you, your relationship and any chance of it coming back was gone. 
Because it was. You’d fought, explained that you loved him but needed a little more from him, wanted more from him. He fought back, he’d said things, called it quits and then walked out because that was what he said he wanted. And if he was willing to go that far, you need to believe it was what you should want, too.
You were right to worry about agreeing to meet with him for dinner.
I should have left at 6:25, you curse yourself. 
“I don’t know, Mat.” You say finally, honestly. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
The smile that had been lingering at the corner of his mouth slightly disappears. “What’s not a good idea?”
“Any of it,” you say honestly, pushing the words out of your mouth with a tired breath. “I just don’t think that’s a good idea.”
Mat’s quiet for a moment. You can’t read the expression on his face, can’t parse out what he’s thinking or what he’s feeling. It’s a little daunting, seeing as how you used to be able to read him like a book.
But trying to exorcize him from your mind when you were broken up meant forgetting, and you’d clearly managed to forget more than you originally thought. 
His whiskey on the rocks be damned. 
Said whiskey was still in his glass, untouched, and Mat stared at it for a second before looking at you, nodding. “Okay.”
You raised a brow in suspicion. “Okay?”
He nods, pulling out his wallet and flipping through a few bills. “Yeah, okay. I can respect that.”
You can’t help but stare at him, only a little confused.
When he’d called you out of the blue this morning, he seemed eager. He said he wanted to see you, have dinner, and talk to you about something important. You could practically sense the adrenaline running through his veins, could hear the hard thuds of his heartbeat through the phone. And while you knew Mat was always the kind of guy who was mature enough to take no for an answer, his response made you a little surprised that he wasn’t going down without a fight.
“Come on,” he says gently, placing a couple of bills on the table - more than enough to cover the drinks you’d ordered and a generous tip - before standing up, and extending his hand towards you. “I’ll bring you home.”
“Mat you don’t have to-”
“I’m going to,” he insists. “I asked you out, almost got here late. It’s the least I can do.”
With a moment’s hesitation you could tell Mat didn’t like by the flex of his jaw, you placed your hand in his, accepting his help as you stood up. Together, you both put on your own coats, gathered your things, and exited the restaurant. 
You follow Mat to his car, thanking him as he opens your door, making sure you were secure before getting in on the driver’s side and peeling away from the curb.
“Do you want me to stop to get you something to eat?” He offers. “I just realized I all but dragged you out of there, but you probably didn’t even eat yet.”
“No, I’m okay.” You assure him, albeit lying a little. You had been starving, but his choice of conversation curbed your appetite quickly. 
“Are you sure?” He offers. “I can stop somewhere, or order a pizza.”
You shake your head, “No, thank you. Just take me home.”
The rest of the drive is silent, save for Mat’s radio playing lowly in the background. You keep your eyes trained out the window, refusing to acknowledge Mat or his constant fidgeting. You know it’s a sign that he’s got something to say, probably wants to bring up your decision at the restaurant, or maybe insist on dinner, but thankfully, he keeps his mouth closed.
Once he gets to your apartment, he parks outside, making a point of saying “Stay right there,” as you reach for your door handle.
With a small roll of your eyes, you indulge him, waiting patiently for him to round the car and open your door for you. You take his outstretched hand, allowing him to help you onto the curb and dropping it the second you can stand upright.
He locks his car, escorting you into your building and following along with you in the elevator like he always used to.
“Always gotta make sure you get in safely,” he used to say when you chastised him about this before. “I need to see it with my own two eyes.”
When you finally reach your front door, you find that you just want him to leave, and can’t seem to get him out of your hair quick enough.
You reach for your keys in your purse, fumbling a couple of times trying to get the stupid thing into the lock. 
“Let me get it,” he offers, reaching for your shaking hands, but you snatch them away before he can touch you, taking a step back.
“I don’t need your help, Mat!” You nearly shout, almost regretting it when you take in his expression.
Almost.
“Hey,” he says, hurt lacing his voice as he frowns. “I was just trying to-”
“I know!” You sigh out, frustrated and exhausted. “I know what you were trying to do, Mat. I appreciate it.”
“Then what’s the issue?” He asks, hands gesturing between the two of you. 
“I thought tonight was about getting closure Mathew, not getting back together!” You exclaim, exasperated. You fall back against the wall closest to your door, head thumping gently back against it. “It took me by surprise and now I feel like everything is upside down.”
“It doesn’t have to be!” He counters, just as exasperated as you. “It can be simple, it can be easy, if you just let me-”
“Why would I let you say anything to me?” You snap, your angry gaze cutting him straight down the middle. 
“Because I still love you!” His confession takes you by surprise, and he crowds into your space, the heat coming off of his body in waves. “I love you, and I want this. I want us back, and I just want to work this out.”
You can’t find the words for a small moment, taken aback by the sincerity in his eyes, and how he’s behaving like nothing happened. “After the way you spoke to me when we broke up? After the things you said?” That seems to shut him up. “You really think you deserve another chance?”
At your words, Mat could see the wall you were slowly building up to keep him away, to shut him out and push him away for good. If he wasn’t upset before, he definitely was now. He feels so close to seething, his chest rising up and down with every angry breath. He is angry, yes, but not at you, never at you. At himself. He presses his hands on either side of your head, resting on the very wall he had your body pressed up against so many times before. 
Before, when he’d bring you home, press you against this wall by your door and make out with you for what felt like hours, before eventually dragging you inside when you could hear people coming up the stairs or when the elevator dinged. 
But now, he was so livid, so fucking angry with himself that he felt like if he tried hard enough, he could push his hands through the brick, felt like if he closed his fists, he’d pound into the masonry until it was rubble.
“Don’t shut me out.” He pleads. “I know what I said was awful, but-”
“No buts.” You respond. Your tone was dry, your eyes empty. You were looking right at him, but all Mat felt was hollow, like you were looking right through him instead. 
“Baby, I want to make you understand but-”
“No buts.” You repeat, a little firmer, a little louder. It took the breath right out of him. “Every time you say ‘but,’ it negates everything you said in front of it.”
You’d said that once before, he remembered. You were saying it to Tito, giving him advice on how to make up with a girl after they’d fought, explaining how to communicate better instead of making things worse. Mat remembers how tuned in he was to you talking to Tito about it, how he couldn’t help but feel like you were sharing a piece of yourself in turn, that he didn’t realize he was staring at you until someone cleared their throat.
Here and now, with your beautiful eyes looking through him like glass, he wishes he could’ve stayed in that moment. Wishes he listened to his gut all those months and didn’t take this risk.
That he didn’t risk losing you.
He was so sure all of this would have ended with him breaking your heart. 
Now you were breaking his.
“Baby,” he chokes out. “I just didn’t think that I could be what you needed back then. I didn’t think I was good enough to be what you needed, okay?”
“But if you loved me, you would’ve at least tried.” You reason.
Mat shakes his head. “I do love you. Love you. I just didn’t want you to get hurt, can’t you see that? There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re beautiful, you’re perfect, so perfect it makes my chest ache.”
“Is that why you called me clingy?” You deadpan, recalling his exact words the last time you saw one another. “Is that why you said my emotions were too much? Why you said I was asking you for too much? Is that why you said it felt like I was suffocating you by asking you for more? I’m so perfect that it makes you feel sick just being so close to me all the time? Is that the ‘ache’ you were talking about? There’s nothing wrong with me now, but you weren’t willing to try to do anything more to be with me back then? Is that why you did all of this? Because the whole ‘it’s not you it’s me’ bullshit you’re spewing right now contradicts that a lot, you know.”
“I didn’t mean that.” He pleads. “I didn’t, I swear. I just said all of that-”
“To make me believe it.” There’s no emotion in your voice or your eyes, no light, no wonder, no window into what you’re thinking. All the fire and molten heat that’s usually there is gone. 
It's all my fault. He thinks miserably. 
Mat swallows thickly, hoping he didn’t snuff out your flame and make you shutter yourself away, but it’s no use. He knows it’s his fault. “Well,” you begin, placing one palm flat on his chest and pushing. “Congratulations. I do.”
He goes easily, taking a step back even though it feels like he’s putting miles between you both. It dawns on him when his hands fall to his sides lamely that he could have touched you, kissed you one last time just then, and since he didn’t, he probably never will again.
“You were right.” You say simply. “That day, when you said that when people show their true colors we should believe them. And I believe you, Mat. I believe all of you. Especially the version of you that you really are. And that version of you? Doesn’t want to be with me.” 
After every word, all the fight dies out of him a little as you push yourself off the wall, not sparing a single glance at him as you walk away, dragging his battered heart with you as you enter your apartment, and lock him out.
~
Your heart pounds as you finally throw your apartment door shut behind you and lock it and struggle with everything in your power not to collapse to the floor.
Idiot.
Fucking beautiful idiot.
You can’t do this now, can’t cry and weep and mourn for something that was already over. But deep down, you still believed that what you both had was real. You hoped and prayed with the last shreds of positivity that you owned that for once, for one small moment, this thing with Mat would allow you to exist outside of yourself and have something real, something tangible. That he would fight for it.
And even that was taken away from you.
And yet, you should have known it was all too good to be true. Hell, you did know. And you hoped anyway.
A mild trill sounds from your purse - your phone - and you groan, trying so desperately to push the pain of your heartbreak away. 
You wipe furiously at your face, willing away tears that threaten to surface while trying to shove your emotions down. You tear off your purse, coat, scarf, and make quick work of throwing your hair into a bun before wrenching open the closet and stripping down, tossing your clothes into your hamper before stomping into your bathroom. 
Your phone rings again, and you let out a pathetic cry of frustration, stomping back to where you left it and fishing it out.
It’s Mat, and his name fills your screen with his text messages. 
Please baby, please talk to me 
Let me fix this baby
I need you to know how sorry I am
If anything baby, please believe I never meant to hurt you
I need you
You fling your phone toward your bed with an angry scream that turns into a sob, and you sink to your knees on the plush carpet of your bedroom. 
Isn’t this what you wanted, once upon a time? Someone to fight for you, fight to keep you, fight to win you back, to be lusted after, desired. 
You weren’t sure you wanted this anymore.
You’d dated others, but you never felt heartbreak with them.
You did with Mat, though. You felt every crack in your heart. Felt the sadness, the sorrow, the misery.
With Mat, he seemed to make you feel everything and more.
And that was why this hurt so bad.
Because you felt it all anyway.
You fell together anyway.
You loved him anyway.
Love him anyway.
Fuck.
~
It’s hours later, getting close to eleven at night and you’re sipping on your late night glass of wine when your apartment’s intercom buzzes.
Despite your better judgment, you get up from your spot on the couch to answer it, figuring it’s probably your neighbor two doors down who forgot her keys - again - after a night out.
You press the intercom to talk, saying “You owe me wine for this, Isabella.” 
The voice that comes back is not Isabella’s at all.
“It’s me.”
You nearly drop your wine glass, what little alcohol you’ve had tonight rushing through your veins and to your brain quickly, too quickly, and you’re pressing the intercom again before you can register what you’re doing.
“Mathew?”
“Yeah. Can I come up? I was hoping we could talk…talk again, I mean. I didn’t like how I acted earlier, and I-”
You’re pressing the buzzer to let him in before he can finish his sentence, not necessarily needing or wanting to hear the rest of his plea. The last thing you need is for anyone to spot him on your doorstep this late at night.
There was a small part of you that was grateful you’d managed to shower after the little semi-breakdown you had after getting back from dinner. Although now you regretted putting on the silky tank top and shorts pajama set.
Definitely can’t open the door wearing that. 
You quickly place your wineglass on your nightstand, running to your dresser fully intending to grab clothes to change, but then your doorbell rings, and, well.
You could stall, could change anyway, but you don’t need him in the hallway any longer than necessary in case your neighbors spot him.
So instead, you trod over to the door, opening it to find Mat standing there in black sweatpants and a black shirt, his hands in his pockets and his hair a little damp, though thoroughly disheveled, as if he’s been running his hands through it over and over again since getting out of the shower.
You step to the side, allowing him in, and he crosses the threshold, taking off his shoes and putting them next to yours like he’s done hundreds of times before. You shut the door behind him, taking your time locking it to try to catch your breath.
He goes to sit on your couch, then pauses halfway there, unsure. 
This was where it happened, after all. In your living room.
Where you’d fought, he’d spewed his venom, broke your heart, then walked out. 
Deciding you also don’t want to sit on the couch, you walk past him, leading him into your bedroom. It’s probably not the best idea, but it’s the safest alternative. 
You sit at the edge of your bed, and Mat leans himself against your dresser, feeling too antsy to sit down.
“I’m sorry,” He starts. “For how I acted earlier, I didn’t mean to make it seem like I had a right to your time.”
You shrug. “It’s okay.” 
Mat shakes his head. “It wasn’t. And it also wasn’t fair of me to ask you out to dinner and not explain my intentions behind it. Dropping that on you at dinner wasn’t fair either, and I didn’t mean to blindside you with it.”
You nod, reply on the tip of your tongue when Mat forges on. “I realize I have no right to ask anything of you, and no right to ask for the space to explain myself, but I’d like to, if you’d let me.”
It takes you a second, but you already know your answer before you’re speaking the words. “I’ll let you.” You say softly. 
This conversation has the beginnings of closure to it, and no matter what direction it goes in, you need to hear what he has to say if there’s any hope for you to either move past this, or move on from him.
So you let him talk.
Mat takes a deep breath. “I was feeling a lot of things that day. Frustration over the season, how it ended, and then family stuff, more stuff with the surgery. And you were there every step of the way, and I appreciated it, I really did. I guess I just felt…overwhelmed? Overstimulated? There was so much to do and say and I felt like I just needed to be alone for a second, just to breathe.”
He takes another breath, his eyes furrowing as he tries to recall how it was for him back then, trying to say the right things the right way. “You weren’t clingy. You weren’t suffocating me. You weren’t too much, and your emotions weren’t too much. You were always enough, you were perfectly fine. I know you just wanted to be there for me, to support me and help me through what I was feeling, but I’ve never had anyone do that for me before. Every one I’d been with before just sort of…left me to deal with it on my own.”
Mat sighs, chancing a look at you. You’re sitting there, listening to him intently, giving him your full attention like you always used to do, allowing him the time and space to gather his thoughts and feelings. 
When his gaze becomes too much, you find yourself tearing it away, staring at the floor of your bedroom instead. It stings, Mat realizes, not having you look at him like that, but he accepts it, knows he deserves it. 
“I didn’t know what it felt like to have support like that.” He explains. “I wasn’t used to it, and I was wrong to think even for a second that you wanting to be there for me, or you wanting more from me once things got better, was you just wanting my attention, or you wanting anything other than to remind me that you loved me and that you were there to help me, but that you also had your own needs, and that they weren’t being met.”
He sighs, disappointed in himself. “You poured all of yourself into my cup, and I couldn’t return the favor when it mattered most to you. I’m sorry that I didn’t see that sooner, and it shouldn’t have taken me a month and a half to come to you and apologize. I thought I was doing the right thing, walking away, but I can see now that I wasn’t. And I’m selfish enough to admit that I don’t want to let you go.”
There’s a quiet sniffle from you, and Mat feels his gut twist uncomfortably. “I understand if you don’t want this,” he says. “If you don’t want us. I know I was an asshole, I know I took too long to get my shit together and tell you what a piece of shit I was, and probably still am. I still meant what I said, though. I do want you. I want us. And I know I’ll have to work hard to get you back, and I will put in the work, I swear it to you, if you’ll still have me.”
Another sniffle, but no words. He can see you swipe at your eyes, but no words come out.
His heart cracks in his chest.
“Please, baby.” Mat says softly. He gazes down at you, from where you sit on the edge of your bed, and wishes in his head that you’d just look at him. Even if it was just for a second, even if it would be the last time.
You shake your head softly, still cast to the side, those full lips beginning to pout, your bottom lip starting to tremble, and Mat feels like a knife just plunged into his heart and twisted.
Even when you two went through rough times, even when you broke up, he never made you cry. 
And he wasn’t going to start now.
He takes a step forward, and then another, until he’s as close to you as he can be without touching you. He drops down to his knees then, and noticing there are tears beginning to well in your eyes, he decides he has to touch you.
Carefully, Mat reaches up with both hands, cupping your cheeks, and wiping gently at your tears with his thumbs. “I’m so sorry, baby.” He murmurs.
You let out a shaky breath. “It’s-”
“It’s not fine.” He insists. He applies gentle pressure behind his hands as he turns your head to face him. You blink when you meet his gaze, more tears falling onto Mat’s thumbs, and he wipes them away. When they keep coming, he lowers his hands a little and leans forward, gently kissing the tip of your nose, then the spots under your eyes, kissing your tears away.
“Tell me what I have to do, baby.” He pleads, moving closer, rising up a little on his knees to rest his forehead against yours. “I’ll do anything, I swear. Tell me what to do. Tell me what you need.”
There’s a small shake of your head, and he can feel you beginning to relax into him. “I don’t know.”
Before he can reason with himself if he should do it, if he’s lost the privilege to, he presses a soft kiss to your lips. He’s surprised when instead of shoving him away, or refusing his kiss, you kiss him back.
He can feel your hands move to his arms, gently pulling him forward, and he kisses you again, moving between your legs when you open them to press the two of you together. As the kiss deepens, he wraps one arm around your waist, banding the other across your back so he can gently grip the back of your neck, and your legs wrap around him, pulling him closer, your ankles locking at the base of his spine.
A small gasp escapes Mat when he feels you grind yourself against his shirt-covered abdomen, and the hand on the back of your neck creeps upward, grabbing a fistful of hair at the base of your skull, using it to anchor you both. At the tug of your hair, you moan, and Mat feels his whole body light up with electricity.
He murmurs your name against your lips, presses kisses there, to your chin, your cheek, working his way down to your neck, sucking little bruises into the skin. He releases your hair, trailing his hand down your arms, moves to your collarbone, sucking bruises, leaving little nips and bite marks as he goes, all the while you keep trying to tug at his hair to get him back to your lips.
Mat acquiesces once, brain going blank when your soft tongue grazes over his lips, and he accepts it, cupping the back of your head and sucking on your tongue lightly. Then, he’s pulling back just a little to kiss your lips, sucking your bottom one into his mouth, and then pulling it between his lips as he pulls away. You loosen your grip, but keep your hands in his hair, running the curls through your fingers. 
“I’ll do anything.” Mat repeats the words against your skin, his hands running down your front, settling on your hips. Picking up from where he left off on your collarbone, he presses a sweet kiss to the skin before sinking his teeth in gently, enjoying your little moans of surprise before using his tongue to satiate the little pain from the wound. “Anything to make you forgive me.”
He starts to work his way down, leaving a trail of kisses on your chest, pulling the strap of your tank top off of your shoulder before pulling the neckline down, exposing the top of your breast and immediately sucking the skin into his mouth, hard.
You let out a small whine, arching your back and pressing further against his mouth, your hands tightening their grip in his hair and Mat groans from where he’s latched to your breasts.
He tugs at the hem of your tank top, and you both part for a small, torturous second, for you to all but tear it off, flinging it somewhere to your bedroom floor before his lips are immediately back on your skin, his hands cupping your breasts in both palms, kneading them in his hands before sucking on one nipple, then the other. 
“I’ll do anything to have you again,” Mat begins, your nipple caught between his teeth. “To make you mine again.”
He rises up on his knees, his tongue purposely swiping over your nipple, your chest, your neck, and as he goes, your core throbs as you watch his tongue glide over your skin before he tucks it back into his mouth. 
“I’m so fucking sorry baby,” he says when his mouth releases your skin. “I’m so sorry.”
His eyes lock onto yours and you meet his gaze straight on, watching, waiting, until he tilts his chin just so and you meet his lips, kissing him once, twice, three times before he presses his whole body against yours, hands disappearing from your breasts to cage your body against his once more.
His tongue slips into your mouth, hands roaming over your bare back before sneaking into your hair, grabbing a fistful at the nape of your neck and pulling your head backwards. He chases your mouth, biting your lip as he pulls away slowly, trailing his lips down your chin and then latching onto the particularly sensitive part of your neck, sucking the skin into his mouth hard. 
You moan in response, can feel his tongue massaging over the spot as he continues to suck, and a sharp but delighted hiss leaves you when you feel his teeth scrape gently against the spot. His lips release you a moment later, and he eyes the blooming hickey with pride.
“Never should have let you go,” he murmurs, and then Mat’s arms move, releasing you from his caged embrace so his hands can coast down your sides, settling on your hips as he continues to leave bruising kisses on your neck, fingers dipping into the waistband of your silk sleep shorts. 
“Can I take these off of you?” He murmurs against your collarbone, and you nod, lifting your hips just so, and Mat wastes no time in tearing the material down your legs and off of your body, flinging the things to some spot in your room. 
Mat eyes your exposed pussy and can feel his heart thump against his chest. “God I missed you, missed seeing your pretty cunt every day.”
He moves to place his arms under your thighs, to pin them up next to you so he can devour you, right where you’re glistening and wet for him, but then you’re grabbing at his shirt. He thinks you want it off, so he complies, tearing it off and throwing it to wherever the rest of your clothes are, but then you’re beckoning him to you, reaching for him with your hands, and he smirks a little.
Mat presses a kiss to your pretty glistening heat, looking up at you from under his eyelashes. “I want to taste you baby, it’s been so long.”
You shake your head, a crease forming between your brows as you reach for him. He goes easily, reaching up to smooth that crease away beneath his thumb, and you cup his face, laying back on your bed and pulling him with you.
He climbs onto the bed, moving you both up the mattress until your head is resting on your pillows. He places his hands next to your face, propping himself up so he doesn’t crush you. Your legs wrap around his waist, pressing the two of you together as you kiss him, writhing beneath him like the hottest thing he’s ever seen in his life. 
“It has been too long,” you say in agreement, lips ghosting over his as you speak. He can feel you trying to use the heels of your feet to push the band of his sweatpants down. “I need you now, Mat.” 
“Okay baby, okay,” He acquiesces, repeating the word as he pushes his sweatpants and boxer briefs down just enough to free his cock, feels it throb once it’s pressed between the two of you, resting against the soft skin of your belly. 
An excited noise trills from your mouth as you reach between you both, lining him up with your slick folds and grinding against him. The feeling is overwhelming, blinding Mat as he shuts his eyes and groans, rocking up against you, delirious with the friction. “Condom?” He asks belatedly, trying not to choke on his breath when the head of his cock nearly catches on the entrance to your pussy.
You shake your head emphatically, watching completely dazed as Mat reaches a hand between the two of you. 
“No, it's just been you. Only you.” His head swims at your admission, and he dips a finger inside of you, then two, collecting the wetness before bringing his coated fingers to his mouth and sucking them clean. He groans, cock pulsing again as he grinds against you. 
You reach for his face, chasing his mouth for a filthy open mouthed kiss that he’s happy to give to you. 
“Had to taste you,” he explains. “Couldn’t wait another second.”
“Need you now, Mat.” You breathe against his lips, and he nods, pulling his hips back ever so slightly until the head of his cock rests against your entrance, and then he’s pushing forward, sliding inside of you slowly. Your breath catches in your throat, and Mat can’t look away, can’t stop watching the way your eyes glaze over before they roll back into your head. 
“That’s it baby, take my cock.” He praises, eyes casting down to where he’s pushing inside of you.
You take every inch of him perfectly, as you always have, and once he’s fully inside, Mat gets in close. He’s on his knees, positioning his thighs under your own to both keep you propped up and open to him, and to keep himself close to you.
Your eyes are squeezed shut, your body consumed by the white out pleasure of Mat’s thick cock sliding into you. Your fingers are tangled in the sheets beneath you, back broken on an arch, mouth open in a silent cry. It’s been so long since you’ve taken him, and your body’s reacting like it’s the first time you’ve been with him all over again.
You’re so focused on his cock, on how full you feel, that you can barely register that he’s speaking to you, calling for you. His voice comes back to you as pleasure ripples through your body. 
“-please honey. C’mon baby, breathe,” he encourages, cupping your face in his hands. “Breathe for me baby, you can do it.”
You inhale sharply, chest heaving, gathering air in your lungs as you can feel your body begin to adjust, the blinding pleasure of him being buried inside of you starting to replace the stretch and pressure of his welcomed intrusion.
“That’s it honey, that’s my girl.” He praises, thumbs caressing your cheeks as he slowly pulls his hips back, then pushes in again. His abdomen drags against your clit, and your eyes squeeze shut again, overwhelmed by everything Mat. 
His hips move like that once, twice, three times before your orgasm shoots through you like a rocket. It’s so sudden, so unexpected that Mat nearly loses his pace. He has to bring his hands to the back of your knees and pin your legs down so he can continue to drive into you, flexing his hips and fighting past the tight squeeze of your cunt on his cock, fucking you through your orgasm just the way you love as you cry out.
Your name falls from his lips, completely dazed as he watches you. Your cry evens out into a whine, your grip on him loosening a little, and Mat bends his head to kiss you, laughing softly as when your eyes slowly blink open as he pulls away.
“Good baby?” He asks, and you can only manage a small nod in response.
Your blood feels like syrup in your veins now that he’s made you come once, and Mat loves you like this. Loves when you go soft and pliant under him, loves that you trust him to make sure he takes care of you like this.
“More,” you beg, and Mat nods, bending once for another open mouthed kiss, his tongue dragging over yours before you part.
“Love it when you come for me,” he says against your lips, moving his hips so he can fuck you with slow strokes. “Have to fight my way in every time, just to keep fucking you, just to make sure you keep coming all over me.”
“Mat!” You cry out, his hips driving into that spot inside of you that makes you see stars. 
“You’re gonna deny me this?” He asks, a slight taunt to his voice, but you can hear past it, can hear the plea in his voice, the desperation. “You’re gonna take this away from me baby?” 
You’re shaking your head before he can even finish the question. It’s no use. 
While you were alone after dinner, you’d had way too much time to yourself, to think, to overthink, to mull over every single second from the fight, to the break up, to tonight, to slamming the door in Mat’s face. 
You knew, somewhere in your heart, that you’d already forgiven Mat before he came back. That whatever his excuse, whatever his reasoning, you’d forgiven him for what had happened.
And it wasn’t until he came back asking for a second chance that you realized you’d give him that, too. You’d give him anything he asked for. 
Because you loved him.
He drove you batshit crazy, but you loved him. 
And you hadn’t exorcized him out of your life, not really. No matter how much you tried to pretend like you had.
Maybe it was your greatest flaw, but you were too forgiving of a person.
You couldn’t deny Mat a damn thing if you tried.
And you didn’t want to deny him, not anymore.
“Answer me,” Mat demands through clenched teeth, pressing down on the backs of your thighs as he begins to drive into you, merciless and desperate. “Am I going to have to fuck you like this is the last time?”
He punctuates his question with a particularly hard thrust, pushing a choked sound out of you as your pleasure starts to build and twist. 
“I want to hear you say it,” he orders, pistoning in and out of you. You can only watch him, stunned.
It was no secret he was beautiful, no secret he was stunning. But only you got to see this, this moment where he looked like a god among men.
The sweat at his hairline, the pinched look of concentration, the veins along the muscles in his arms straining as he holds you down, holds you open so he can fuck you the way he knows you like, the way he pleases you best. The way his eyes flame as he watches your every move, tracks your face so he can be sure he’s bringing you nothing but pleasure.
“Tell me,” he insists, bending his head a little to press a kiss to the inside of your knee, and you don’t miss the way it still sounds like a plea. “Tell me you’re mine.”
You nod, brows pinching together as the delicious drag of his cock brings you higher and higher, closer to your next orgasm. Mat can tell, knows exactly what you need, but he won’t give it to you.
Not yet.
“You don’t get to come again unless you say what I want to hear.” Mat says, slowing his pace to emphasize his point.
A whine sounds in your throat, and he laughs a little, resting his forehead against yours. “I know baby, I know. I know exactly what you need, everything you need. In this bedroom, in this bed, and outside of it. I know everything that you need and I promise I’ll give it to you. But I need to hear you say it. Need to hear you tell me what I want to hear.”
You can only manage a whine, too focused on the slow drag of his cock, the way it feels like you can feel every hard vein and ridge of it slowly fucking into you. Mat shakes his head at your broken noises. “I know it feels good, baby, but you can do it. Use your words, pretty girl.”
“I’m yours.” It comes out as a whisper at first, too overwhelmed by the feeling of his cock, the friction of his solid abdominal muscles against your clit as he writhes against you slowly. 
“You’re mine?” He repeats, not even trying to hide the bit of disbelief in his voice, the uncertainty. “Yeah? You’re mine? Look at me baby.” Your eyes lock onto his, and he holds your gaze as his hips grind into you. “Are you mine?” He punctuates his question with a particularly hard thrust. “Am I yours?”
You nod again, crying out “Yes!” when he starts to fuck you again. His pace is unrelenting, his hips unforgiving as he moves, driving his cock in and out of you, consistently hitting that spot deep inside you that makes you see the sun, the stars, the moon, the whole galaxy with each thrust.
“Tell me what I need to do.” He says to you. You blink lazily at him, lost in the way he fucks you, and he crowds his body in closer, dropping your thighs and cupping your face in his hands, using the muscles in his hips to fuck you deep, grinding his cock into you some more. 
“What do I need to do baby?” Mat asks again, voice a little softer. His words are loaded, multiple meanings behind the question, and you know what to say to answer them all. He waits as patiently as he can, his mouth locking yours in a deep kiss as you start to squeeze down on him. He can tell you’re getting closer, can tell you’re right on the edge, but he still needs to hear you say it. 
“Need you to make me come.” You answer finally, lips brushing against his as you speak. He nods, forehead brushing against yours from where it rests. His hand snakes between you both as he circles your clit, applying just the right amount of pressure to the sensitive bud. Your back arches up in response, moving further into his touch.
“Come for me, pretty girl,” Mat pleads, keeping his hips in time with the circle he’s drawing against your clit, swallowing your cries with a kiss. “I wanna feel you come for me again.”
The dam breaks, your mouth opening on another silent cry as you breath gets caught in your throat, white light bursting as your eyes fall shut, cunt squeezing his cock impossibly tight.
Mat’s orgasm hits him like a freight train and he groans out loud, doing his best to keep his eyes open so he can watch every second of you coming all over him. His cock pulses, his come spilling inside of you in thick ropes, and he can barely breathe as your pussy squeezes around him, like you’re trying to pull him deeper inside of you.
When your orgasms subside, Mat goes to pull out of you so he can lay beside you, but your legs lock around his waist, and you pull him down to you, taking him by surprise with a sweet and gentle kiss. That gentle kiss morphs into the both of you making out lazily, you winding your hips, grinding against him while his cock rests inside of you. 
You both remain like that for what feels like hours, but is probably more like fifteen minutes straight, Mat’s cock getting hard all over again, and you can feel your arousal slowly returning, ready for a round two, if needed. Eventually, Mat’s lips trail lazily from your mouth to your cheek, chin, neck, shoulders, collarbone, moving across your chest to reach your other shoulder, other side of your neck, and so on then back again, leaving kisses in each place as he goes.
After a little while longer, your post orgasm high subsides a little and your head starts to clear bit by bit. When you manage to come back to yourself, you realize Mat’s been murmuring his apologies into your skin, over and over, only pausing when he gets back to your lips, then resuming his apologies as his lips follow the little trail he’s made.
On what you think is his eighth loop around, you tangle your hands in the curls near the nape of his neck and tug a little, removing his lips from their place against your shoulder, dragging him to your mouth and kissing him again. 
You roll the two of you so he’s on his back, his now half hard cock still nestled inside of you and your thighs bracketing his torso. Mat’s hands rest on your hips as he looks up at you, his lips a bright pink from all of the kissing. He looks dazed still, like he isn’t sure if this is all real, then his brow furrows, and regret slashes across his features.
He moves his mouth to form another apology, but you rest a single finger against his mouth, shaking your head softly. 
“I know,” you tell him. “I know you’re sorry, baby.” Slowly, you start to wind your waist, watching Mat’s eyes roll into the back of his head, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips and trying his damndest not to thrust up into you. There’s a hiss that leaves his mouth when you squeeze, and a harsh breath is punched out of his lungs.
“I’m sensitive pretty girl,” he says, definitely not half hard anymore. Mat can’t tear his eyes away from where the two of you are joined together, where he can see his own come starting to drip down his cock, watching as you fuck it back into yourself as your drop your hips down.
“Just need one more.” You promise, can already feel your body chasing after the next orgasm as you move.
Mat nods, pupils blown wide as he watches. “Take what you need baby.”
And you do, planting your hands on his chest as you begin to bounce. Your nails dig into his skin a little, dragging them down his pecs and to his lower abdomen, watching in delight as red marks bloom in their wake, Mat groaning out loud, low and deep, his hips bucking up into you. 
He always did love it when you scratched him up like this.
“More,” he pleads, and you slowly glide your palms back up to his collarbone, digging your nails in once more and dragging them back down in the same path. His body jerks a little when he moans, and then he’s grabbing your hips and sitting up, laying you down and getting onto his knees to fuck you all over again. 
Your hands move to his ass, pulling him in deeper, your nails sinking into the hard muscled flesh and dragging up to his waist, and Mat’s thrusts become harder, sharper, and your orgasm rips through you like a lightning strike.
He follows close behind, fucking past the tight grip of your pussy and coming with a hoarse shout, pinning his hips against you as his cock throbs.
You move your hands then, cupping his face and pulling him down to you, allowing him to bury his face into your neck as he tries to recover. You both breathe deeply for a while, heated skin cooling as the time passes. Eventually, Mat presses soft kisses to your neck, then shoulder, before propping himself up above you by his hands. 
“We should probably shower, shouldn’t we?” He suggests, and you nod. He carefully pulls out of you, but when you move to sit up, he gently pushes you back down, eyes glued to your pussy, where his two loads start to slowly leak out. Mat takes two fingers, gathering what’s coming out and pushes it back into you. Your back arches in response, a small hiss pushing through your clenched teeth. 
He removes his fingers, bringing them to his mouth and sucking them clean before leaning over you again, capturing your mouth with his, sharing your combined release. 
“Want some more?” He murmurs against your lips, and you nod, your eyes locked on one another as he reaches down, his fingers pushing back in, stroking you a couple of times before pulling them out. This time, when he brings his fingers back up, you grab his wrist before he can put them in his mouth, bringing them to your lips instead, sucking them clean. Mat’s eyes flutter, glazing over and you can feel his cock start to come back to life where it rests against your thigh.
Once his fingers drop from your mouth, he surges forward, kissing you again and you both fall back onto the bed, all thoughts of doing anything but making out leaving your minds for the next ten minutes.
Eventually, you manage to pull away, resting a hand on his chest as you part. “It’s getting late,” quickly adding, “we should probably shower now, so we can head to bed.” when you see Mat panic a little, thinking you were going to try to kick him out. 
He smiles a little, nodding. He gets up first, reaching out a hand for you to take. Once you’re both upright, Mat looks down at you and smiles a little, brushing some hair away from your face then pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You go first, I’ll gather up the clothes and get the bed ready.”
You nod with a small smile, heading into your bathroom to pee and start the shower as Mat busies himself with gathering up your clothes, tossing them into the hamper in the corner of your room. He feels his heart thump in his chest at the familiarity of taking your decorative pillows off of your bed, putting them on their designated shelf in your closet, then fluffing the pillows you actually use before bringing your comforter down.
When he finally makes his way into your bathroom, he finds you standing under the spray of the shower, watching through the glass as the water cascades down your body.
A body he almost let go, a body he knows he’s honored to be able to worship again.
He wastes no further time in stepping into the shower with you, wrapping his arms around you to pull you in close, resting his cheek on the top of your head. 
“I’ll do better, I’ll be better.” He swears to you.
Your hands rub up and down his back in a soothing pattern. “I know, Mat.” Your name falls off his lips in a soft murmur, and you pull away a little, tipping your head back just so to look up at him. “We’ll be okay,” you promise, nodding to reassure him.
He nods back, cupping the back of your head in his hand, resting it against his chest. “I know we will, baby. I’ll make sure of it.”
~
A week later, you wake up to soft and gentle fingers dancing up your bare back, winding into your hair and twirling a strand around it before working its way back down, gently stroking into the dip of your back. 
The sheets are tangled around you, the curtains in your bedroom drawn to let the mid morning sunlight pour in, and Mat is sitting on your side of the bed, his hand moving to gently caress your face when he sees he’s managed to cajole you into opening your eyes. 
“Good morning beautiful,” his voice is soft in the quiet of your room.
You smile in turn, rasping out your own “good morning” before turning onto your side to face him fully. “What got you up so early?
He shrugs, pulling your sheets down to your waist, running his hands over your skin. “Made you breakfast.”
“Breakfast?” You ask, playfully skeptic.
“I think I can manage a few eggs, bacon, and premade waffle mix pretty well, but that’s just my opinion.” He says with a small smirk, and your heart nearly leaps out of your chest.
The daylight surrounds him from behind, creating a beautiful glow around him and that’s a sign if you’ve ever seen one. You’ve always liked Mat best like this - soft and boyish in his features, but relaxed, a kind of comfort you’ve always felt from material things but never from a person.
It makes your heart skip a beat, and distantly you think, maybe this is what you’ll remember in the future - this moment, Mat surrounded by sunlight, soft skin, bed head, and waking you up for breakfast. 
Maybe you’ll remember this exact moment and know, that’s when you realized you’d always be in love with him, and neither of you ever stood a chance at anything different.
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ithinkimokeei · 17 days
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So It Goes... / Chapter 5: break from Toronto
Mat Barzal x Influencer!Reader
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summary: Y/N goes to Toronto to support Mat, but she faces an unexpected situation that makes her ask an important question for their future: are they moving too fast?
word count: 8,6k
genre: slow burn, kinda strangers-to-lovers; angst, fluff & smut
warnings: swearing, mention of alcohol consumption, mention of sex, mention of anxiety, NSFW; teasing, protected sex, unprotected sex (be careful pookie), oral sex (both receiving), fingering, slightly overstimulation, dry humping, shower sex, aftercare and that's it ig 🧍🏻‍♀️
note: Hi, everyone! Since they're finally together, this is the last chapter of So It Goes 🥹 I'm going to post blurbs about this series which would be more about how's their relationship going, their future, their past etc. (there are at least 10 blurbs that I'm planning to write!) I hope you like this series as much as I did, let me know what you think! (btw that's my first smut pls be gentle)
Enjoy xx
<- previous chapter
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The honeymoon phase. 
The phase in which you forget about reality and see life through rose-tinted glasses, you see your partner as the hottest person ever, you can’t see their wrongs, and all you want to do is be around (or on) them 24/7, make them feel special and pleased, touch them as much as you can, kiss them all the time, fuck like rabbits, you know, that’s the honeymoon phase!
And you’re so badly in it that you flew from New York to Toronto to support your 3 days long boyfriend with zero hockey knowledge. 
But on the bright side, now you’re in his arms - actually, under his heavy body - and gently scratching his scalp in the big hotel room with no disruption, just you and him.
“So what team do you wanna be in? Oh, wait, is it Bieber’s? I heard that you’re a fan.” you softly chuckle at the memory of the video his fans sent you, causing him to grunt at the crook of your neck. “Your lips are my biggest-” 
As soon as he picks up the lyrics, he gets up over your body like a shot and stares at you with the same expression you had when you watched the video for the first time: his eyes are wide open and jaw is on the floor. “You tricked me?” he gasps. 
You copy his expression as you bite your laugh back and say “No, I didn’t!” He cocks one of his eyebrows, you can tell he’s also holding back his laugh. “You said you won’t watch it, didn’t you?” 
You’ve been together for less than a week but you’ve been close for weeks now and one thing you love about him is that he always finds something to laugh at! It can be about himself, you, or something so irrelevant, but he manages to find something!
You tilt your head to his question and pout. “Okay, okay I said it, but you asked me after I watched it, so… But I swear I haven’t watched it since then!” you claim and open your arms widely, inviting him back to top off you. “Can you please come and hug me now, I’m getting cold.” 
“How can you get cold with that hoodie on you?” he takes his place on you again and presses a warm kiss to your pouted lips before resting his head on your chest and wrapping his arms around your torso, letting you feel his warmth again. “And don’t worry, I trust you.” 
“You know that you’re so cute when you fake mad, right?” you pout and continue, “By the way, it wasn’t that bad.” you coo as you try to get comfy under him, wrapping your legs loosely over his thick thighs, which makes him let out a guttural sound. “First, can you stop moving? You’re gonna wake him up. And, it wasn’t my best performance, I was tired and not ready, okay? But at least it wasn’t as bad as you singing ‘Baby’.” 
Who’s laughing now? 
“What?” you look at him with your eyes darted. He doesn’t look at you or say anything, but you can feel his shit-eating grin on your neck. “No… Please tell me you didn’t watch it...” you beg, knowing damn well he watched it. 
 
“And that’s the outfit of the day!” you show your outfit to your phone’s camera once more and finish the TikTok video. You have a pair of black, straight-leg jeans, a black long-sleeve tee shirt, and again, a black puffy jacket on top. You and Mat are going to grab some coffee… with his sister Liana! 
After that short Facetime in your apartment during breakfast, you got a text from Liana, saying that you should catch up before the game and hang out. You immediately said yes because, well, you’re not sure if it’s a Barzal thing but she’s as easygoing as Mat, which made you like her already, and you have no friends here. 
Alicia is in New York, babysitting Benji, Sydney is in the Bahamas with the other Isles WAGs, Zara is in Paris with Peter and even though you have Mat, it’s his week to shine so you can’t expect him to entertain you for the next 3 days. 
You just pray to whatever god or goddess hears you to not let you do something to make her hate you like your ex-boyfriend Jacob’s sister, Victoria. Even the name of her gives you goosebumps and you can’t prove it, but you’re 100% sure she still hates your guts even after years. 
Jacob was a nice guy, probably the nicest you met when you were at university. You started dating when you were in sophomore year. He was tall, brunette, and probably the most handsome guy for your 20-year-old self. He was the quarterback for the school’s football team, it was so easy for him to make everyone fall for him with his athletic body and his heartwarming smile. 
He was the one who encouraged you to start posting vlogs on YouTube, he was your first and biggest fan, and he was always there to support you no matter what. 
You never had dreams about getting married, having a fancy wedding, or having a big, perfect family, these weren’t your things until you met him. He was the guy who made you want to marry and have kids, you loved him that much and you know that he loved you as much. 
But you can’t say the same thing for his family, they didn’t love you even a bit and they didn’t try to hide this. They didn’t want you around their one and only son and they did everything to show this to you, especially Victoria, she was the evil queen of your relationship. It’s kinda funny but she was the reason why you broke up 2 months before your graduation. 
You still don’t know what made them hate you so much, for a long time you thought it was about him being their only son, they wanted him to focus on his athletic career and his studies instead of spending his precious time with a girl. You thought maybe they were always like this towards the girls around him until you got his wedding invitation last summer. 
You saw how happy they were with their bride-to-be, Lizzie, which means their hate was especially for you, especially for something about you! It’s not that you still think about them, obviously, you don’t care about them anymore, but the fact that you’re going to meet Mat’s sister in thirty minutes and eventually, if you’re lucky, you’re going to meet his parents makes you anxious. 
You fell in love once and lost him because of his family, you can’t let this happen again. 
“Did you steal my fit, Ms. Y/L/N?” you hear your boyfriend’s cocky voice, leaning against the door frame and observing you, he’s wearing the exact same outfit you’re wearing. “No way, is that the same jacket?” you ask in amazement. You look like the couples who intentionally match their outfits, but thankfully not that bad. “Oh my god, we look like Z and Pete right now.” you frown. 
He laughs at your expression and says, “I take this as a compliment because they’re the best couple I know- I mean after us, but still, that’s a compliment!”  
You listen to him with a smile on your lips, thanks to your 3-inch boots, you can admire the face you’ve been obsessed with lately. He is clean-shaven for today’s event, his face is bright and even though he still has little scars from the fight, he looks flawless, his lips look red and kissable as always while his eyes shine every time they meet with yours. 
You wrap your arms around his neck and give him a quick kiss. “Yeah, I think we look disgustingly cute like them. She’s gonna throw up when she sees us like this.” 
He rewards you with another laugh and kisses you back. “What were you saying? ‘That’s a couple shit’, eh?” you nod to him while gently biting your lower lip as he continues, “Even if we’re disgustingly cute, that’s a couple shit, baby, she better get used to it!”
 
You arrived at the café shop earlier than Liana and ordered your drinks, but she joined you as soon as your orders were ready. She ignored her brother and gave you a hug when she saw you. 
She’s nothing like you were scared of, she’s nothing like Victoria! 
She’s so chill and looks so happy to be there with you, also you’re not sure if it’s because you miss Alicia but she reminds you of her, from the way she talks to the way she jokes about things are almost the same. 
So, you like her very much!
“That’s your first All-Star, right? Are you ready for the week?” Liana asks with a smile as she takes a sip from her drink. You shrug your shoulders before responding. “I mean, I actually don’t know much about the drill but Maty explained to me as much as I understand.” 
She leans back on her seat and fixes her hair. ��It’s not that complicated, you’ll get it as you watch it, anyways that’s not what I’m wondering, are you guys ready for the dinner?” she asks, you can hear the excitement in her voice. “No offense but I’m more excited about that rather than the game!”
You try your best to keep that smile on your face as your glance goes between two siblings, when you hear your boyfriend clearing his throat, you ask him hesitantly. “What dinner?” 
“Family dinner..?” he says with a forced smile, Liana looks at Mat when she feels the thick tension between you. Now there’s a very uncomfortable silence among the three of you. “Wait, I’m sorry, haven’t you talked about it?” 
You let out a nervous laugh as you anxiously play with your fingers under the table. “What!? Of course, we did! I… I just forgot it was dinner, I thought it was going to be lunch, you know, before the game!” 
Mat grabs your hand and gives it a light squeeze as a ‘thank you’ that only you can understand. 
He knew that he should have told you about the dinner before you walked out of the hotel room, or even when they talked about this yesterday, but he didn’t, it’s not that he forgot or he didn’t want to tell you, he was just scared that you would turn him down. Well, the way you learned is definitely not better than him telling you, he knows that he also knows that you’re going to have a deep talk about this when you go back to the hotel room. 
 
Your way back to the hotel was tranquil, most of the time you just listened to both siblings yapping or, you just acted like you were listening because you were so lost in your mind, thinking about the worst possibilities about the dinner that you just learned. 
You said your goodbyes to Liana and separated to your hotel rooms to get ready for the evening. It’s a little over 1 p.m. and even though you don’t have to be ready just yet, you know that Mat has some interviews, photoshoots, and media stuff to do and you promised to help him get ready. 
As soon as you enter the hotel room, you take your jacket and boots off and make your way to the ensuite to take a quick shower, leaving Mat in the middle of the big room. “Baby, hey, what are you doing?” he asks when he understands you’re not planning to talk about what happened.
You walk out of the ensuite with a long, white bathrobe, your hair is finally freed from the tight ponytail, and it’s falling over your shoulders. “I’m gonna take a shower? You know, there’s an event about you tonight?” you answer ironically.
“I know, but can we talk first? We have lots of time to get ready, you know.” he begs. 
Okay, when you were in the ensuite, you wanted to avoid this talk at least until the draft was over and keep your cool but now he looks like a kicked puppy with his shiny hazel eyes and pouty lips and you’re not sure if you can avoid him!
You cross your arms on your chest and ask, almost sounds like you’re challenging him. “Exactly what are we gonna talk about? Your sister already said everything, we’re gonna have dinner with your family in two days like we’ve been together for the past two years. Can I take a shower now?” 
“Why are you acting like this right now? Look, I know I should have told you as soon as I could, you shouldn’t have learned this from Lia, but you’re making this hard for me right now.” Mat says as he sits on the edge of the bed, bouncing his right knee haphazardly. 
“Excuse me, how am I acting? Can you please open this up because that conversation reminds me of something else.” you ask, cocking your eyebrows. 
It reminds you of your fight with Alex the night he came over to your apartment and asked you why you were acting like a bitch as if he wasn’t the one who made you act like a bitch.
Mat takes a deep breath, runs his fingers through his dark hair, and speaks, “You’re acting the way you said you hate a lot! Aren’t you the one who said we should talk about our problems? We should communicate? I’m trying to talk and apologize but you’re saying you’re gonna take a shower, is your shower more important than us right now? Seriously? Look, if you need time to think, I get it, do whatever you want, Y/N, but please tell me what you want first!” 
You feel your eyes getting blurry when you hear the dejection in his tone, you walk in between his parted thighs with your head low, trying to hide your watery eyes from his curious ones. “I’m sorry…” That was the last thing you say before wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders, trying to hide your tears from him, but he can understand you’re crying from your arrhythmic heartbeats and hitching breaths.  
“Don’t be, baby- hey, don’t cry, Y/N/N, please baby…” he pulls you to sit on his left thigh, pressing your torso to his big one tightly. “It’s okay, don’t cry…”
Fun fact: if you tell someone who’s crying not to cry, they’ll cry even harder. 
And you start crying even harder, your tears wetting his black tee shirt and you try to catch your breath between your sobs. “Are we moving too fast?” you murmur towards his chest, not sure if you ask him or yourself. 
“What?” he asks, wishing he heard you incorrectly. You pull away from his chest and wipe away the tears under your eyes, clear your throat, and repeat. “Are we moving too fast? Last week we weren’t even talking and now I’m learning that I’m gonna meet your parents, don’t you think we’re moving too fast?”
“You don’t have to meet them if you don’t want to, I can cancel it with your one word, you know that, but if you want to keep this as a secret, if you don’t wanna be seen with me-” you cut him off before he finishes his sentence, before he changes the subject to a something that isn’t near to be true. “Mat, no! No, I don’t care about anyone else, okay? If I did, I wouldn’t be in this room right now, people already saw us today! I… I just-” You start crying again. “I don’t want them to hate me…”
“They’re not going to hate you…” he murmurs, cupping your cheeks and swiping your tears with the pads of his thumbs. 
“How can you know that?” you ask, your throat hurt from crying. 
“Because they’re my parents, I know them! Do you think your parents would hate me?” you shake your head side to side and mouth a ‘no’ for him to continue. “See, then they would hate you? Stop worrying!” he tucks your hair behind your ear and looks at your glazed eyes. “If you think that was my idea, it wasn’t! My mom insisted on this dinner, she wanted to see the reason why his son had been on cloud nine for weeks.” 
“Yeah?” you ask, your voice cracking a bit. He presses his soft lips over your plump ones, tasting your salty tears on his tongue like the very first time you kissed. 
“Yeah.” he murmurs onto your lips, feeling you get relieved with his words and soft kiss. 
He pulls away before you deepen the kiss and gets a groan from you as a protest. “Do you believe me or should I kiss you until you believe me?” he says as his eyes wander between your watery eyes and red lips. 
Okay, is that a threat or a promise?
“I might need more kisses…” you whisper to his lips before pressing your lips on them, you can feel him smirking but you don’t mind it. You kiss him with hunger, you suck his lower lip until it turns red and your tongue tries to find its way inside his mount, but unfortunately, he pulls away one more time. 
“We are gonna get late, baby.” he announces reluctantly. 
He’s right, you have to take a shower, get ready, and leave in an hour- well, he has to leave in an hour, so you still have time to get ready. 
You sigh and get up from his thigh, grab his hands, and drag him to the ensuite with you. “Join me?” you ask with your most innocent yet teasing tone. “In the shower?” he raises his eyebrows, you can’t tell if he’s actually surprised by your proposal or playing along. 
“Yeah, save the time, save the water.” you reply with a smirk, shrugging your shoulders. You turn over without waiting for his response and turn on the water the way you like it. You push your thong down your legs slowly and unwrap your bathrobe before stepping inside the cabin, you can feel his eyes on you as he takes his clothes off as if he’s in a rush. 
You get under the warm water and let it fall down your naked body, trying your best not to care about the body getting closer to you. Well, it’s somewhat difficult since you’ve been waiting to get that close for over a year and your body is craving his touch all over you. 
A squeak escapes from your lips when you feel him pushing your wet hair from your left shoulder and leaving kisses over the thin skin of your neck. You bite your lips and throw your head back to give him more space as he continues pressing his warm lips over your fragile skin.
“You good, baby?” Mat whispers to your skin, lips not leaving your neck until he finds that sweet spot. “Uh-huh…” you murmur in response. His deep voice and his hands wander on your ribs, softly brushing the sides of your tits as he pulls you toward his warm body making your knees weak. 
Your bodies are so close to each other, it’s like you’re in the same body, you can feel every inch of him pressing to you, his rapid heartbeat on your back, and his hot breath on your neck, all of these things send goosebumps down your spine. 
He spins you around in his arms, finally letting you see his darkened eyes and slightly wet hair, looking hotter than usual as if it’s even possible. He looks lost as he admires your face, which turned crimson red with his action, and your wet hair that stuck to your naked upper body, yet he can see the newly forming redness on your neck, his little gift from seconds ago. 
“You look gorgeous, Y/N…” he says, pushing a strand of your hair away from your face. 
You didn’t put heavy makeup on but still, you have makeup on your face, and your hair is probably not looking its best, so basically, you’re looking like a wet cat right now! But that man loves every version of you, he saw you in the morning when you just woke up, he saw you when you were so drunk that you couldn’t walk and he saw you when you were a crying mess, but he never saw you looking bad, you somehow manage to look breathtaking without even trying. 
You’re always gorgeous in his eyes and always will be. 
You gaze over his swollen lips, all red from almost making out with your skin, you get support from his shoulder and strong arms wrapped around you, you get on your tiptoes, and brush your nose to his, smiling unfeignedly. “You look gorgeous, Mathew.”
You lock your hands behind his neck, pulling him into a deep kiss. Your teeth are brushing and your tongues are fighting to get domination. You suck his tongue eagerly and taste him as much as you can, you can tell he likes your action as you feel him getting hard against your thigh. 
You let out a moan between your kisses when you feel him squeezing your soft flesh, reluctantly letting him take control of your kiss. He starts giving open mount kisses to your jawline, to your neck, and eventually down to your collarbone. You can feel the throbbing between your legs increase as he gets lower. 
He pulls away a few inches from you and looks up into your eyes, “Can I, baby?” You want to scream ‘YES’ but honestly, you don’t trust your voice at the moment, so all you do is nod your head. He doesn’t seem satisfied with that and asks your permission again. “Words, Y/N, use your words.” 
You gulp and push yourself to the cold wall of the shower behind you, feeling a little eased up with the chilliness. “Yes… Please…” you whisper. 
He sucks your right nipple in without wasting any second, making you whine with his sudden action. He never cuts eye contact as he licks and swirls his tongue over your hardened peak, stimulating it. He hums into your breast when you tightly grip the short hair on the back of his neck. He continues sucking and kissing your skin and then does the same thing to the other one while his hands run all over your body, gently teasing you.
You can feel your wetness spreading down your inner thigh as his kisses go down from your chest to your lower belly. He doesn’t want to miss any spot, he wants to kiss every inch of you and show his love and admiration to you. He wants to worship your body, make you feel better than you’ve ever felt before, but most importantly, make you forget about all the unnecessary thoughts in your beautiful head. 
Your chest lifts with deep breaths, it feels like hours and you feel like you can’t wait any longer. He is kissing and sucking but actually doing nothing except making you wetter, and no, this wetness has nothing to do with the water falling over you two! 
“I wanna taste you,” he kisses your hip bones between his sentences, getting closer to where you need him the most. “Can I, baby? Would you let me taste you?” 
“Mat, please…” you whine with excitement, “I need you…”
He hums at your response and starts placing kisses on your right thigh before throwing it over his shoulder, getting better access to your glistening pussy. You throw your head back with the feeling of his hot breaths that send you goosebumps. He licks a stripe before gently sucking your throbbing bud in, a moan escapes from your parted lips. 
His tongue flicks over your clit, sucks, and kisses it, giving it all the attention it needs before pulling away and giving kisses down your inner thighs. He, once again, licks all the way up to your clit and sucks it harshly before burying his face into your opening, eating you out like a starved man. 
You let out another moan when you feel his fingertips closer and closer to your aching cunt, fluttering around nothing with expectancy. He pulls away after another swirl and looks up at you, your chest lifts heavily, and your lower lip is trapped between your teeth, waiting for his next move with a haze. 
He traces his middle finger down to your dripping wetness, pushing it slowly without breaking eye contact, he doesn’t want to miss anything that comes out of your plump lips. He holds back his moan when his finger slips into your silky walls so easily, your walls hug his finger so tightly as if they don’t want to let him go. “You’re so wet, baby, so wet and tight.” 
He pumps his finger in and out until he finds a rhythm and slips another finger in, stretching you out nicely before messily licking your clit again, stimulating you until you buck your hips to meet his fingers.
You feel the coiling tension inside your core as he speeds up both his fingers and his tongue, he can feel the pulsation of your walls, begging for more and he’s here to give you more. 
“Babe… Keep going, please- Mat!” your pleas mire down with your own squeak, and your vision fills with white spots when he fucks you knuckles deep with his long fingers, his tongue slurping your sweet juice oozing out of your tight walls, helping you to ride out your high. 
He doesn’t stop until you whine out with overstimulation and try to push him away. He spreads kisses all over your thighs and your lower belly before rising to his feet, observing your fuck-out face with a proud smile. “You did great, baby, I’m so proud of you.”
You groan and finally open your eyes, meeting with his hazel ones beautifully shining. “If you show the same performance in the skills competition, no one can beat your cute ass.” you tiredly giggle at your own words and wrap your arms around his neck. 
He throws his head with a laugh after your words and now it’s your turn to observe the beautiful man in front of you, his chin glistens with your arousal and his spit, and his face and chest look so red with adrenaline running through his veins - and of course, the hot water still falling over your bodies. 
You still can’t believe you have this man all to yourself, looking like a fucking Greek god with his splendid face and well-shaped body! 
“I think we should keep it PG on the ice.” he says, pulling your face to another kiss. He knows that he’s probably going to get late but neither you nor him can’t get enough of each other. 
You break the kiss with a giggle, which makes him giggle too. “What’s so funny?” he asks, curiously waiting for your answer. “Your little man is poking me.” you gush as you try to hold back your nervous giggles. 
He’s making you nervous with his not-so-little man down there. 
“Hey!” he protests jokingly “He’s not a little man!”
You hum at his words, “Yeah, should I believe my eyes or your words?” you cock an eyebrow, trying your best to keep your straight face. “Do you want me to prove it?” he whispers to your ear, shaking your body with a new wave of euphoria.
“Y-yeah, that might be helpful.” you shutter, letting him wrap his big hands around your thighs. “Jump, princess.” he softly giggles. 
He lifts you smoothly and presses you to the wall, his red lips meet yours once more as you hold onto him tightly. You probably look like a koala hugging a tree with both of your arms and legs wrapped around your boyfriend’s toned body, but who cares?
When he pushes his tongue inside your mouth, you hum with your own taste. He runs one of his hands between your bodies while you’re so lost with the makeout and pumps his thick length a few times before running his pre-cum oozed tip over your slit, smearing your juice over it. 
“Are you ready, baby? You want him?” he says, lips brushing over yours. He’s going to make you eat your words, you know that when you feel his angry tip over your sensitive bud, making it impossible for you to think straight. “I want you Maty.” you whisper timidly, as if you weren’t the woman who teased him minutes ago. 
You close your eyes when his tip enters inside your silky walls, tightly hugging him. As he halfway sinks in, your jaw falls open with the intense feeling, he stretches you out so perfectly. He attaches his lips to your neck, waiting for you to relax and trying to focus on something else than your warmness that fits him like a glove lest he’ll cum in this second.  
A little while later, when both of you get used to each other, he starts thrusting in and out slackly until he finds the perfect rhythm that you can’t hold your whimpers and moans back. “Mathew!” you whine and pull his hair when you feel his sharp teeth on your collarbone, you don’t want to think what your neck and chest look like after all his kisses, sucks, and bites all over your sensitive skin.
Your walls clench around his thick member uncontrollably, driving him even closer to insanity every passing second. He pulls out almost all the way out, and only his sensitive tip nestles inside you before slamming you, causing you to squeak loudly, he does that a few times and starts pounding into you, almost choking you with his deep thrusts. 
Your nails claw his broad shoulder, probably scratching deeper than you should have that he lets out a groan to your action. The bathroom fills with unholy sounds of your skin slapping each other, water splashing everywhere, your moans and pants mixing.
He can feel you’re getting closer and closer to your high with every pound, your walls grip him tightly, it’s almost impossible for him to move, but your juice makes everything easier for him. His hand on your waist, holding you like a lifeline finds its way to where your body meets, the pad of his thumb draws circles on your throbbing bud, making your insides hug him even tighter if it’s possible. 
You feel the burning feeling in your lower stomach form again, this time quicker and stronger than the previous one. “Don’t stop, I’m so close…” you pant out, your legs around his waist quiver every time his tip brushes that sweet stop that makes you forget your own name.
The knot in your lower stomach snaps out as he increases his speed, your back arches from the wet wall behind you and your eyes roll back as you whimper out his name again and again, practically you can't control yourself anymore. The squelching sound coming from your pussy disgustingly increases as your juice oozes out of your opening, covering his member. 
The warmth of your silky walls, the way they suck him in, and flutter around him tightens his balls and makes his cock twitch with an intense need for release. He thrusts a few times before pulling out from your clinging walls holding him tightly, making him not want to leave, but he feels like he can’t hold any longer. 
A whine escapes from your swollen lips when he murmurs he has to pull out, you reluctantly loosen your legs around his toned waist to give him some space to slide out, leaving you with emptiness and you carefully sit on your numb legs to help him to chase his high. 
“Fuck…” he curses under his breath when you cup his balls, gently massaging them as he rapidly strokes his length which is covered with your wetness. Heavy breaths leave his open mouth with every stroke, he looks like he can faint away in this very spot, his attractive face is scrunched with his closing release. 
You leave open mount kisses along his rapidly rising chest and neck when he cums with a loud groan, painting both his hand and your lower bellies with his thick, white ropes.
Your face smushes in the crock of his neck, savoring the moment as his strong arms wrap around you, pulling you closer to his wet body, and kissing your wet hair. “That thing you did,” he starts, his voice is a little raspy, you tilt your head to look at him properly after a while. “That was insane!” he says, letting out a high-pitched chuckle which makes you giggle towards his chest. 
“Did you like it?” you ask as you run your finger through the chain around his neck, your lower lip is between your teeth, eyes are locked up his glazed ones with admiration. 
“Did I like it?” his eyes wide open now, looks at you with disbelief “I fucking love it!”
You timidly smile at him and card your finger through his dark, soft hair, dragging him closer to you and giving him a peck before speaking. “I have my skills, too”
A loud phone ring coming from the pile of clothes ruins your intimate moment, separating you from your kiss and bringing you back to reality: he's actually getting late this time!
“Oh, fuck me!” your boyfriend groans, “No time nor water saved!” he says before rushing into cleaning your cum, sweat, and spit washed bodies, trying to wash away the disgusting smell and liquids all over you as fast as possible. 
 
After your ‘time-saving’ shower, Mat got into his navy blue two-piece striped suit, did his hair, and rushed out before wasting any more time. Thankfully he didn’t lose anything, they rearranged his photoshoots and interviews after some other players. 
Meanwhile, you spent some time on your phone and called Alicia to help you choose a cute outfit that would look good both for the drafts and the little after-party. You wore your favorite pair of high-waisted blue jeans, a black, strapless corset, and a black leather jacket on top. It was a pretty daring choice for the cold Toronto evening, but at least you were looking good.
You posted a short GRWM video before leaving the hotel room and jumped in your Uber.  You’d like to go to the arena with Liana, but, as it should be, she was with her parents. After their son, you can’t steal their daughter too! You caught up before the event started, honestly, she was being a better friend than you expected, she was texting you about the things you should know as much as she knows, explaining some things they talked about, and keeping you entertained. Oh, by the way, at the end of the event, Mat was drafted to the team Matthews/Bieber as you wanted. 
Thank your lucky stars, your blue stars designed nails weren’t wasted!
Mat’s parents went to their hotel after they celebrated him and finally, you had the two siblings all to yourself. After Mat finished everything he had to, the three of you joined the after-party and enjoyed the moment. Surprisingly, Bieber gave a performance, sang one or two songs from all his eras, and of course, he sang ‘Baby’, too, which gave your boyfriend a great chance to mock you. 
And now it’s almost 11 p.m., and you just return to your hotel room, getting unready so that you can rest thoroughly for tomorrow while your lovely boyfriend yaps about tonight's event. 
“He only hugged me, right? Obviously, he wanted me too!” Mat says, pressing his hands to the countertop behind him, watching you carefully while you’re doing your night routine, you can tell how happy he’s with this situation by his tone. 
“Everyone would want you, babe. They did the right move.” you assure him calmly, you’re right, though, everyone would want him, both as a player and as a friend in their life. He is amazing on ice, you don’t have to be a hockey expert to understand that, he is so fast yet careful with his every move, and can be the saver of the team if it’s needed, that’s a fact. 
You finish your routine and get into the bed before it gets too late, you hold each other tightly as your legs intertwine and arms around each other, your head nests in the crook of his neck, tracing your fingertip on the bright chain around his neck. 
“I’m sorry for overreacting this morning, it was stupid.” you whisper in the dark, you know that your talk didn’t exactly end, you just put it off. “I just thought it would be like my past relationship- I don’t know, I was scared that this, us would be like it, they’d react to us like his family did.” you add. 
“Do you wanna talk about it? People say I’m a good listener when I don’t talk.” he jokes, trying to hype your mood up while he plays with your soft hair, wrapping it around his fingers. 
“There’s nothing much to talk about, you know, they didn’t like me and he wanted to listen to his family, that’s it. His name is Jacob by the way, he got married last year. I don’t know, I always thought they didn’t want someone around their son and their discomfort wasn’t about me, at least that’s what he wanted me to believe, but they were so happy with his new girlfriend, so basically it was about me! I still don’t know what I did to make them hate me!” you rant while still lying on his toned, naked chest, letting his warmth comfort you. “But you know what, it’s their loss.”
“That’s my girl!” he chants, kissing the top of your hair, drawing your delightful scent in. “Also, their loss is my win, you know.” 
You press one of your forearms to the soft pillow next to his head and look at his sleepy face, lit with the lights coming out of the room's big windows. “Is this a Biebs lyric?” you tease, lifting your eyebrows. 
“Yeah, we’re collaborating.” he rolls his eyes and adds “No but seriously, don’t worry about them, okay? If they don’t hate Maggie after what she did, there’s no way they will hate you!” his fingers tuck the strand that gently tickles his skin behind your ear, cupping your cheek with his big hand and drawing you into a slow, heartwarming kiss. 
You don’t know what happened between them, of course, Sydney told you that they didn’t end up so well, but until this time, you’ve never talked about your past relationships - unless you’re not joking about them - so you can’t exactly compare yourself with her and their relationship, but you trust him. 
Your prior fear was about Liana because of Victoria, let’s be real, she’s the one in New York and you’re going to see her more than their parents, so it’s important to get along with her! And, since she’s already one of the sweetest people you know, you should be relaxed about the parents, right? With two children like Mat and Lia, they can’t be like his parents!
“Okay,” you murmur against his lips, your eyes still closed, almost feeling like falling asleep on him as your bodies are intertwined and your heartbeats synchronized, giving you the peace you’ve always needed. 
“Okay.” he copies you, pulling you closely to himself with his strong arms wrapped around you, giving each other the comfort and the silence you need. 
 
It’s Saturday night and the All-Star game is over, even though yesterday’s Skills Competition didn’t end so well, Mat showed off with a splendid performance today and made the team’s way to the prize with five assists and a goal! The fangirl inside you wants to jump his bones right now, but you have to get ready for dinner with his family. 
You’ve watched 12 “GRWM to meet his parents” videos in the last 3 days since you learned the news. Yes, not 1, not 2, you’ve watched 12 videos! To be fair, you’ve learned many things like how you should be who you are, wear something appropriate, be polite and respectful- oh, and wait for the right time, don’t meet them too soon or too late! 
Well, is 6 days too soon? Hell yeah! 
But now, it’s too late to hide from them since they already saw you after the game with their son, and well, probably everyone who follows you on socials saw you together in the past couple of days, so you have no other choice but to meet them.
“You have time to find them, you know.” your boyfriend speaks from the ensuite, trying to hide his chuckle while making his not-so-short hair.
“Mat! I told you I can’t hide from your parents by acting like the fourth Hughes, I don’t even look like them, that’s crazy!” you grunt. Even though you said you’re okay to meet them after he reassured you that day, you’ve been ranting to him about how stressed you’re to meet them and ever since he understood you’re not going to relax, he’s been making fun of you about it. “You’re the step-sister, baby, that’s why you don’t play hockey!”
“I wish I had supported my brothers then.” you reply with an eye roll.
Mat tops his hair off and makes his way to you, standing between your legs. You tilt your head and admire the man in front of you: he looks breathtaking in his black, loose sweatshirt and black cargo pants, and his face lights up with a crooked smile. 
“Baby, I’m joking, I won’t let you be a Hughes, okay? Are you ready to go?” he asks, brushing the pad of his thumb on the edge of your chin. “Yeah, I think so, do I look good? Like family appropriate kind of good?” you stand up and spin around to give him a full view of your outfit.
You have a pair of wide-legged jeans and a white top matching your heels, you still have the same fresh makeup on your face, you just did some touch-ups, and you're done. 
“You look so pretty, Y/N, they’re gonna love this, but don’t forget to take something on, you’re gonna freeze. Seriously, Sydney would kill me when she finds out you’re sick.” he kisses the corner of your lips. 
You look gorgeous the way you are right now, and if it was up to him, he wouldn’t even leave this room. He can still feel the adrenaline running through his veins, making it harder for him to keep his hands to himself when you’re standing there with all your charm, looking at him with shiny, doe eyes. If it was a week ago, he would curse himself for thinking that way while you’re all looking innocent, just excited to meet his parents, but he knows that you’re not so different from him at the moment. He caught your eyes and your teasing touches all over him all day, you’re only holding back because you’re nervous but both of you know that there won’t be any holding back later the night. 
 
“Aw!” you yelp between your messy kisses when your back hits the door. You come back from the dinner, slightly tipsy and drunk on happiness, you’re not sure how you find your room or get inside but you are here now, your legs are wrapped around his waist, and hold onto him like a lifeline. 
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Mat coos against your skin, hands gripping your ass firmly as he makes his way to the bed. You never separate even when you get onto the soft bed, you straddle him, feeling his rock-hard bulge under you, gently swinging your hips to feel some relief on your throbbing clit. 
“I need you, Maty!” you whine, almost out of breath after the kiss. “I need you too, baby.” he responds, catching his breath, his swollen lips are apart, looking so red because of the kiss that it’s almost impossible not to kiss him back. 
You press one of your palms to his clothed chest while you continue humping against his bulge with the help of his strong hands pressing you on him, making your thong drench with your arousal. 
Your lips find his strong jawline and spread kisses all over it until you find the sensitive spot behind his ear, you suck it until guttural groans escape from his lips. “I wanna suck you.” you whisper into his ear, your hands sneak inside his sweatshirt, taking your time before taking it off. “I wanna reward you for today.”
You bite your lower lip when you hear him curse under his breath, and then he says, “I’m all your princess, do whatever you want.” 
Your lips find his again, pushing your tongue inside his mouth without wasting any seconds, your hands find the zipper of his pants, unzip it quickly, and start kissing all the way down to his neck, his chest, and his abs. You get on your knees and you lick his visible abs and V-line before he lifts his hips to help you push down the unnecessary clothes. 
You unconsciously lick your lips when you come face-to-face with his thick, veiny cock, his angry tip is glistening with pre-cum. He stops you before you wrap your hand around him, his voice makes you look up to him. “You’re not playing fair, take off your top!” he grumbles. 
You take your top off and give him an ‘Are you happy now?’ look before spreading the pre-cum all over his member to give you enough lubrication to pump him, running your thumb on the popping vein under it, making him lean back and closing his eyes with a groan. You run your tongue through that vein and start giving kitten licks to the tip, you hum with the salty and bitter taste on your tongue, which makes him go feral.
After some teasing, you swirl your tongue around the tip a few times and suck it inside before start bobbing your head around his length. You repeat your action until his tip hits the back of your throat, making you gag around him and dig your nails into his thick thighs. 
You clench your thighs for some relief at the sound of him whimpering your name and cursing, you’re pretty sure the wetness of your thong already ruined your jeans too.
“I don’t wanna come just yet, baby, c’mere, let me feel you.” he says, gently pushing you off of his twitching member. You wipe the spit off your lips and chin with the back of your hand and start taking off all your clothes urgently. Mat, also, pushes his pants and boxer all the way down and takes his shoes off, taking a condom from his wallet and getting comfy against the pillows. 
He gently strokes himself and wears the condom as he watches you taking your clothes off, showing him every beautiful inch of you. You crawl over him and straddle one more time, this time you have nothing that can stop you, just both of you in your birthday suits, eagerly waiting to feel each other. 
Your hands grab his cheeks, pulling him into another deep kiss while his hands run up and down your spine, increasing the burning desire inside you. You moan when he gathers your soft flesh, making you bite down his lower lip. 
When you feel like you can’t take it anymore, you grab his cock again and guide it into your dripping opening, groaning into his mouth when his tip brushes against your aching clit. You spread your wetness all over him and halfway sink in with a loud gasp. 
You take your time to get used to this amazing stretch, hiding your face in the crook of his neck as he holds you tightly. “Are you okay?” he whispers, feeling like he can just die in this position, feeling your warm walls around him as you hug each other. “Yeah.” you reply, start moving your hips up and down, taking him inch by inch as your hands hold onto his broad shoulders tightly, taking power from him. 
Mat savors the view in front of him, the most gorgeous girl in his life is taking him all the way in with whimpers and cries as her tits bounce on his face, giving him no chance but attaching his lips around one of her nipples, sucking, lapping and biting it until you’re a whimpering mess. 
Your silky walls clench around him every passing second, you feel your thighs burn and the knot in your lower stomach starts to tighten with your uneven bounces. Mat pulls your torso impossibly closer to his when he notices you’re getting closer to your release, setting his feet on the bed underneath you, and starts pounding with a firm rhythm. 
“Oh my god- I’m gonna- fuck, don’t stop.” you whine, you don’t even know what are you saying, your mind goes blank as your clit brushes up to his pelvis and the trimmed hair over there, that little friction and his thick cock stretching you out perfectly makes you go dumb. 
“Cum for me, Y/N, give it to me, cum for me.” he says, holding back his release until you come undone around him, literally screaming his name when the knot snaps out and drenches your lower half with your juice. He fills the latex right after you cum and keeps thrusting in and out until both of you whine with the overstimulation. 
You lay on his chest for a few minutes, your sweat-covered bodies holding each other tightly, whispering sweet nothings to each other as his softened cock nestles in your warmth, not wanting to pull away from you. 
Eventually, you throw yourself to your side and watch him as he pulls the used condom out and ties it up, making his way to the ensuite and coming back with a damp towel to clean you up. You separate your legs apart to give him space when he crawls in front of you, you giggle when he makes eye contact with you. “What?” he asks, smiling widely. 
“I think I just had the best day of my entire life. My boyfriend literally became a friend with Justin Fucking Bieber and made his team win with five assists and a goal, erm, he gave me one of the best orgasms ever, but most importantly, his family loves me!” you gush, almost kicking him with excitement. 
“I told you!” he says with a sassy tone before getting up from the bed, since he doesn’t want to make a mess with your suitcase, he grabs a boxer and a tee shirt from his messy suitcase and throws them to the bed next to you.
They really love you and Mat loves how they love you. 
When he saw you interacting with his family as if you had known them all your life, not even trying to act like someone else that you’re not, and just enjoying the moment with them made something click for him: 
He also loves you. 
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yelenasdog · 1 year
Text
vibrant, saccharine, his ☼ (fwb!mat barzal x fwb!fem reader) 
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genre: filthy smut, fluff, angst with happy ending
summary: pretending is getting harder, for both of them. and after a hard roadie, mat’s not sure if he wants to pretend anymore.
words: 8.7k (WOAH)
warnings: cursing, excessive use of parentheses, friends with benefits arrangement, smut, unprotected piv, oral (f and m receiving), fingering, blood (reader bit lip too hard oops!), pet names (baby, sweetheart, pretty boy), reader is described as having sisters and a dog, food mention, idiots to lovers, misunderstood situation, reader uses she/her pronouns, and i think that’s it.
a/n: when i started this, i originally was just writing a blurb and then it turned into a full ass fic with a plot?? and fwb??? idk man, im nervy to post this since ive never published for nhlers before but oh whale! and ty to @eminems-skittles for reading this for me and checking it over 🤍 love u
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“You played so good, baby.” She breathed, welcoming him home with open arms.
“Not good enough, apparently.” He responded, letting her fingers card through his raven locks. Soft, freshly cut. She loved when he grew it out, but yet again it was him, so anything worked.
She sighed, letting her thumb fall to his cheekbone, knowing what he was referring to. It had been the last stop of the road trip, he’d had a hatty and despite making it to OT, it wasn’t enough in the shootout.
He’d had to wait an entire flight and car ride afterwards to see her, only giving her a brief text when he got off the ice (“We lost. Had a hatty. Fucking Toronto.”) (like she hadn’t stayed up to watch the game) and another when he landed.
And after so long of whatever the two of them had going on, she’d known better than to try to send him some long and winded attempt at a pick me up message. She settled for just responding “I’ll be here.” She didn’t need to say it though, he knew she’d be there.
She always was.
To anyone else it would’ve been sad, how she waited up for him, late nights spent lonely with just her and her dog, as he jetted around North America. In her mind, he was no doubt giving himself away to whatever random puck bunny threw herself his way.
Despite this, she was loyal, even though she had her suspicions about what he did when they were apart. And frankly, it wasn’t a part of the “deal” that they had to be exclusive, and it was none of her business. But truthfully, after so long, she couldn’t count on some washed up juniors player to give her even a fraction of the satisfaction he had.
So, she did this whole routine, whatever this was. She stayed up late watching his games, sitting on her couch in his sweatshirt he left. She wouldn’t admit it out loud, but whenever she wore it, she liked to pretend.
Pretend that she was an obedient girlfriend wearing her loving boyfriends sweater. That as she sat curled up waiting on the corner of the beat up black sofa, 3 coffees in at approximately 1:37 am, she would be rewarded for her efforts come morning time.
That her and said loving boyfriend would lounge around together in bed (after he woke her up in the best way he knew how, showing her how grateful he was. Like I said, she loved when his hair was long enough to tug on, and even though she endlessly made fun of his patchy stubble, she couldn’t deny how delicious it felt burning between her thighs. Especially after they’d spent so long apart.) Then they’d go and grab late brunch, holding hands under the table as they sipped mimosas, which were Mat’s guilty pleasure only her and the waiter knew about, before heading home.
Maybe then they’d FaceTime his mom back in Coquitlam, an early riser with the 3 hour time difference. Mat had felt bad interrupting her morning routine, but she’d never pass up an opportunity to talk to her boy and the girl who she hoped was her future daughter in law.
After they got off the phone, she’d tell him how much she loved his mom, how her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. He’d tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, watching as she leaned into his touch.
“Missed you, Mat.” She’d say, closing her eyes.
“I missed you more.” He’d respond, his voice nearly a whisper. Her eyes would flutter open, and he’d recognize the look in them immediately. He felt his blood rush, and suddenly their proximity, which he’d never get used to, was very obvious.
“Oh yeah?” She asked. “I doubt that.”
He swallowed, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. Her eyes hungrily swept over them, wanting nothing more than to lean forward and capture them with her own.
But patience is a virtue, she supposed.
“Want me to prove it, pretty boy?”
Words failed him, and all he could do was nod. He relaxed into the sofa, watching as she dropped to her knees in front of him. Her hands were on either thigh as he fought the urge to lay his tired head back onto the beat up pleather behind him. It had been too long, he thought. And he’d be damned if he was going to miss out on seeing her do what he’d only imagined in the shower, or over the phone for the past 16 days.
She reached her hands up from the muscle of his thigh up to his tummy, her cold hands shocking him as she reached under his sweatshirt- the same one she’d been wearing before.
Her hands drifted, down, down, down, to the waistband of those damn Lululemon shorts she’d got him for Christmas. He held his breath, watching as they danced around where he needed her most and then-
The doorknob turns, and she’s brought back to reality. Sleep had almost claimed her, iced coffee left abandoned on the coffee table, a ring of condensation already drying on the glass. She attempts to smooth out her hair, hoping that her brief almost-nap hadn’t left her too disheveled.
Not that he’d care.
She stood to greet him as he opened the door, hockey bag, and garment bag, and duffle bag, and backpack, and- God, did he really need all that- and suitcase, dropped unceremoniously as he entered the threshold. He kicked the huge bag to the side, and it landed right under where her keys and her leash for her old mutt, Warrior, hung from the wall.
Above the leash hung a picture of her and her sisters, with her running shoes on the floor beneath it for easy access. They were nearly squished by the gear, and if it had been anyone else’s shit crushing her 160 dollar sneakers, she’d be angry. But the sight of his bag near her shoes was so weirdly domestic, she could’ve cried.
She, yet again, was snapped out of her fantasy by the closing of the heavy door, watching as the man in front of her shuffled forward, immediately allowing himself to be held by her. His head fell to her shoulder, and rather than the usual clash of teeth and shoving to get to her room, (they never went to never his place after a roadie. He needed to be away from the constant reminders of it all for awhile, just to be surrounded by her) she simply dropped a chaste kiss to his temple, letting her arm drop from his hair to his broad shoulders, squeezing once, twice, three times, on either one.
He stood up, and she led him to her room, though he knew the way well enough. Her hand in his felt nice, comforting, even, and he wasn’t going to complain. In the beginning of the arrangement the two of them had, touches like that had been normal. But as time went on, the barely there brushes and gentle caresses stopped all together.
He wanted to say something, wanted to ask her what was wrong, if it was something he did. But when he was off the ice, Mathew Barzal was not a man who liked to push his luck. So he didn’t. He let the touches slip away, and took what he could get from her.
Which right now, was toeing off his shoes, and crawling onto the plush comforter of her bed. It smelled like that sparkly ”fairy dust” shit from Lush he saw sitting on her bathroom counter once, cotton candy and bubblegum infiltrating his senses. That, and her favorite floral perfume he was all too familiar with on her pillow. A combination of scents he usually would find too much, sickly-sweet. But it was her, and that alone made it the most soothing aroma he’d ever known.
Initially when he’d gotten off the ice, the adrenaline had been pumping, and his anger had been rampant. All he’d wanted was to get home to her, have his way with her. To have an outcome he could control.
He’d kept himself relatively calm in the locker room, not having any outbursts towards Ilya, or anyone for that matter. If any of the guys had noticed he was uncharacteristically quiet, they didn’t say anything.
That is, until the bus ride to the airport.
He had been typing out his text to her, (Hatty, lost in OT, Toronto, you know the one), when he had felt a pair of peering eyes. Sitting in the back of the bus, he’d thought he’d done well to avoid such glances, but apparently not.
“Y’know, you shouldn’t be sulking so much.” A certain French-Canadian spoke, the brunette man’s tired eyes lingering over Mat’s hunched over form.
If there was one thing he didn’t need right now, it was more pep talks from Tito. He’d had more than his fill in the locker room. And though he loved the guy, he didn’t need to be told again how he “did everything right” and had a ”killer game”.
Because he knows, and that’s partly why he’s so mad.
Partly. As the other part is the fact that he wants more than anything to come back to NY to her arms. He was exhausted at this point, and rather than having his way with her, he now just wanted to be welcomed home into those ridiculously cozy sheets. He wanted her to light up all those overpriced candles she loved so much from Bath and Bodyworks, and for Warrior to snuggle up by him, stinky dog breath be damned. He wanted her to turn on ”Miracle” in the back as white noise, and laugh as she repeated all the lines from memory. (He may be Canadian, but he can appreciate a heart warming story told by Kurt Russell when he sees one.)
More than anything, though, he wanted her. And not just for an hour or two before he inevitably dragged himself out of those silky sheets that felt heavenly on his back, leaving her sleeping beside him. She looked peaceful in those moments, and he often wondered what she dreamt of. If she was dreaming of him as he did of her.
Bottom line was, Mathew was the victim of a series of unfortunate events. And the man to his left could recognize that it wasn’t just the hockey that was bothering him. (Though, that whole situation did suck pretty bad, he’d admit.)
So when Anthony told him he shouldn’t be sulking, he flashed him a tight lipped smile and a nod, before looking out the window at the Toronto sunset. The oranges and pinks were stunning, and more than anything their vibrancy reminded him of her. The smile she’d give him in her post-orgasm glow, or of the orange blossom on the bottle of perfume on her vanity. Beauvillier’s gaze never faltered, though, recognizing the deep train of thought his close friend was experiencing.
The screen of his phone had begun to darken, the draft of his message just barely visible. Tito’s eyes quickly shifted from the screen and back up to Barzy, opening his mouth and pausing momentarily.
“Who’re you texting?”
Mat quickly turned off the device, the “click” sounding out in the quiet bus cabin, most of the Islanders players catching some shut eye or watching that new Game of Thrones spin off.
Personally, Mat didn’t get the appeal.
“Nobody, just… a friend I’m visiting tonight when we get back.”
Anthony’s eyebrows went up, making a face of understanding as he slowly nodded three times.
“A friend, huh?”
Mathew nods, taking his bottom lip between his teeth and letting it go. “Yup.” He adds softly for good measure, popping the p.
“You visiting a friend after a game like that, this late, hm?” Another pause. ”Must be an important friend.”
“Yeah.” His voice is soft again, compassion coming across his features and he thinks of her again.
“Well“, Anthony starts, popping in his earbuds and opening his phone to his Music app. “I’d say whatever’s going on with this friend seems worth talking to her about.”
Mat‘s head snaps up, and he scoffs, shaking his head.
“I didn’t say that it was a she-“
“You didn’t have to, buddy.” Tito winks in the most annoyingly-Tito way, and chuckles to himself. He then lays his head back onto the navy material behind him. Mat “hmph”s to himself, doing the same. He turns his phone back on again, going to the chat between the two of them. The still blinking cursor seems like it’s mocking him as he runs a hand over his face, hitting send.
If there’s gonna be any deep, emotional shit, it can wait until he’s not 2500 miles away.
7 hours later when he finally crashes through her front door, he swears the relief he feels mixed with the sense of dread it all might be over in an hour, gives him whiplash. But nonetheless, she welcomes him in, and she feels like home.
Warrior watches from the couch, his tail lazily wagging as he observes his owner greeting the man who occasionally slips him bacon from his Starbucks sandwich. His old man (old dog?) body doesn’t find the arrival of the hockey player worthy of leaving his nest on the sofa, as to him that’s all Mathew Barzal is. The bringer of bacon.
To Warrior’s owner, though, he was so much more.
The trek to the bedroom felt like it took an eternity, and as he laid on her bed, he couldn’t help but wonder if it would be a bad idea to push his luck for once. Risk ending it all to gain everything.
She laid down next to him, and he shifted, going from laying with his arms crossed under his head, to one next to her head, the other keeping him stable from his position on top of her.
Her hand crept up to push an unruly lock out of his eyes, and she leaned forward, and he met her halfway. They paused briefly, taking each other in after so long, before finally closing to distance.
He tasted warm, like cinnamon and something she couldn’t place, and she wondered if at the airport he’d gotten one of those pretzels she knew he liked so much. To compliment his psychopath reminiscent black coffee, of course.
His hand went from where it had been cradling her face down to rest on her hip. The soft touch elicited a whimper, and at that he pulled away, resting his forehead against hers.
She recognized that something was off, swimming around in that pretty little head of his. A small frown etched its way onto her face, and she lifted his chin up so he had no choice but to look at her.
“What’s wrong, Mat?”
He took in a shaky breath, looking over to his left, where the TV was on some random wallpaper, a sunset, he realizes. He scoffs, looking back at her.
“Can you just- can we- can I- fuck.” He mutters, slowly falling down so his body weight is nearly on top of her.
“Can you just… hold me?”
She swears she’s never heard him sound so broken.
“Yeah, baby, ’course. C’mere.” She replies softly, allowing him to fully rest on her. It was a miracle that he didn’t fully break down right there, at the feeling of her fingertips dancing over his skin, under his pushed up shirt. His nose was cold against her neck as he dragged it up against her to come to her cheek, pressing a kiss there. His eyes never opened, afraid that if they did, it would all just be another elaborate fantasy he’d created to pass the time.
“Is this a good idea?” Came her voice, cutting through the silence.
He sniffles. “What do you mean?”
“This. Us.” She says, not able to meet his gaze where he’s lifted his head.
“We’re going to get hurt. More than we already have.”
Oh. Oh, fuck this was happening right now. Mat sat up, feeling like a scared teenage boy. Damn you and the way you read people, Beauvillier. Maybe this would’ve been easier from 2500 miles away.
“We don’t have to.”
“What other option do we have?” She said, sounding defeated, like she already knows her answer and she doesn’t like it. “I-I can’t keep doing this no strings attached shit. Not when you do this. Not when you come here all beat up like some sad puppy.”
“I’m sorry,” he said. And he was.
“Don’t be. I should’ve known this would happen.” Her voice was soft, her eyes distant.
“That what would happen?” He questioned. She looked at him like he had two heads.
“That you’d leave, Mat. That this whole pretending bullshit wouldn’t be enough for me.”
He leaned forward again, catching her off guard.
“I’m not leaving you. I’d never leave you.”
She looked away briefly, mentally cursing herself for being so emotional as tears began to well up in her eyes. He fell to her side, forcing her to meet his gaze.
“Do you really want this?” She asked, the tears rolling down her face illuminated a hue of pink from the salt lamp on the bedside table. Mathew reached out a hand, dragging his thumb over the droplet. He hated that she was crying, but fuck, she sure looked pretty while doing it.
His answer came without thought, he’d done enough of that on his way over.
“Yes. I want you in every way, if you’ll have me.”
A small smile came onto the corners of her face, and she nodded, shortly at first, but more exaggerated as they started laughing, a small “yeah?” escaping from Mathew. She responded with the same, and he took that as his sign to reach forward, closing the distance between them.
And like all the times before, they fell into their routine, her hands going down to his hips, lifting the gray material of his shirt over his head. He returned the favor, the two of them moving in sync as she lifted her hips and he gently slid off her shorts. He ran his palms along her bare thighs and she shivered at the feeling, a reaction that didn’t go unnoticed by Mathew.
“I missed you, y/n.” He admitted, running a hand through his, now, unruly hair.
Another vibrant smile came across her face, easing whatever nerves Mat had left over from his confession.
“I missed you more, Mathew.”
He shook his head, dipping down to leave sloppy kisses on her neck. Taken aback, she let a shaky breath escape. He pulled back, satisfied with the response he’d pulled from her.
“Not possible.”
In a moment of boldness (and a slight hope to allow a fantasy to come to life) she challenged him.
“Prove it, then.”
His eyes darkened, then, and he surged forward. Her remaining clothes, which was just his sweatshirt and a flimsy cami, were gone in an instant. She was left in just a pair of black undies, Mat nearly cumming on the spot at the sight, like he’s some horny teenager. His apparel soon joined the growing pile on the floor, as she made a remark about how it wasn’t fair he was still so covered.
She shamelessly raked over his naked form, save for the black boxers, with his firm muscles, sore from the roadie, prominent as ever. She might’ve been drooling, she wasn’t sure. He smirked, the effect he had on her not lost to him.
The two began to kiss again, and there was no other way to describe it other than that it just felt right.
Mathew wasted no time, allowing his hand to trail down and cup her clothed heat, his thumb passing over her clit and past her entrance with a feather light touch. She shivered, her hips lifting up to chase the brief sensation. He pulled her panties to the side, teasing her entrance with his middle finger.
It was immediately covered in her slick, as was the black fabric he’d moved aside. It made him groan just from the sensation alone, making her chuckle at his behavior. Her laugh soon was cut off as he sunk the finger in, giving her no time to adjust, not that she needed it with how ready she was for it, before adding another.
His palm just barely grazed her begging clit as he pumped in and out slowly. And as she continued to lift her hips trying to feel him deeper, push his hand closer to her clit, she fully expected him to push her down and put her in her place.
But this whole thing was about showing him how much he missed her, how much he appreciated her. To show her that he was staying. And him staying meant that he’d have plenty of chances in the future to be an insufferable tease, but right now wasn’t one of those times.
“Matty, please-“ it was more of a breathy whine, not intelligible to an untrained ear. But thankfully for her, that wasn’t Mat.
“You want more, baby?” He questioned, knowing the answer. She nodded, hair splayed around her like a halo on the pillow. She was still illuminated from the TV screen and the salt lamp, making her look like an angel of sorts, not of this world.
“Look at me then, sweetheart. Wanna see that I’m makin’ you feel good.”
Her eyes that met his were glazed over and doe like, and it melted Mat’s insides at just one look. He did his best to push down the mushy feeling that arose, before realizing he didn’t have to anymore. He could feel as sickeningly in love as he wanted, no consequences.
“You’re so beautiful, baby. So needy, fuckin’ perfect girl.” He remarked, adding in a third finger. She let out a borderline pornographic cry, and Mat picked up his pace. His gaze only faltered from her face, contorting in pleasure, back to where he was pumping in and out of her, unable to resist the urge to watch in amazement.
Though her legs were flailing, going from propped up to sliding down and spread, rustling the comforter, she somehow had enough mind to reach a hand down. She attempted to run tight circles around her clit, but not before her hand was pinned to her side by the center above her,
“No, baby. Lemme.”
His range of motion was wider and his thrusts harder as he curled his fingers to perfectly hit that spot inside her that made her see stars, fully trailing his hand over her sex. He repeated the action again, and again, and again- and fuck, she didn’t know how long she’d go on like this but she never wanted the feeling to stop.
He felt her tighten around him, and he picked up his pace, knowing she was almost there.
“Mat!” she managed to get out between strangled moans and panting breaths. He leaned down, kissing below her ear on the one spot he knew drives her crazy. She was halfway thinking, well, less than halfway with her state at the moment, that he would cruelly pull his hand away as she reached her peak. So she clamped her thighs together in an attempt to trap him, subconsciously more than not.
It didn’t stop him from grinding his palm against her like he had been, leaning down to capture her lips with his in a searing kiss.
Everything at once was just so much, the obscene sounds coming from both their mouths and her wet heat, the feeling of Mathew’s bare skin on top of her, the feeling of warmth radiating from his body, and oh my God, after so long it’s fucking finally happening-
He felt as her chest seized and she pulled away from the kiss, her head slamming back before falling to the side. She cried out, her orgasm hitting her like nothing had before.
He found her lips in the chaos beneath him, his hand parting her thighs as she went lax, lazily pumping in and out as she rode out her high. Her slick coated the inside of her thighs, and Mat pulled away momentarily and she whined, like the little brat she was allowing herself to be.
He only smirked, leaning down to kiss on her collarbone, letting his tongue sweep over the seemingly shimmering expanse of skin before him. He moved further down, savoring the taste of her, how it felt to be so close to her. No guards up, no shields, no screening involved.
She moved her ring clad hands to run fingers through his locks, that fucking smile coming across her face. He looked up from where his hands were holding either side of her waist, his fingers digging into the soft flesh just enough to not make it hurt, but to say “I’m here. I’m not leaving.” His chin rested above her bellybutton, and he felt suddenly seen, bashful almost. He continued his trail down in a half assed attempt to hide his face, her breath hitching when he made it to her mound.
Her breath barely returned to her as he skipped over where she thought he was headed, instead opting to take her right leg over his shoulder, moving down the expanse of it to her ankle. He brought his eyes to meet hers, and a tender hand ran up and down the distance of it. He kissed the inside of her ankle, making his way up to the skin where her thigh met her already aching sex.
He lightly nudged his nose against the area, before attaching his lips. He started sucking on the skin there, licking her clean. Satisfied, he moved to the other side, beginning his good work.
“Mat,” she broke her silence, her voice splintered and low, “don’t tease. Please.”
He raised his eyebrows, seemingly in jest.
“I think we’re a little far gone from teasing, eh?” He asked, and truthfully, one mind blowing orgasm later, they were.
She chuckled, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever hotshot.”
“New nickname?” He questioned. “I like it.” He huffed, returning to his place between her legs. “But I fucking love this pussy, baby.”
And with that, he dove in. He immediately groaned at what he had found. (Which, obviously, caused her to tug at that perfect head of hair, eliciting another groan.)
If possible, she had become even wetter with the mix of his spit and her nectarine juices. It dripped down his chin, and he wanted to stay there forever. He’d found solace there, he thought. No Maple Leafs, no Tito, no hatty that meant jackshit in the end.
Just her and her consummate being. Vibrant, saccharine. His.
He wasn’t sure how long he spent drawing her closer and closer to the edge, but somewhere between repeated chants of praises and whatnot, he’d slipped.
“Fucking love this cunt, fucking love you-“
He hadn’t realized what he said, and if he had, he didn’t seem to care. But his words alone were enough to rip an unassuming orgasm from her. She didn’t allow herself long enough to think about if he meant to say it or not, or even to ride out the aftershocks rolling through her nerves. She grabbed him by the shoulders, forcing him away from her glistening cunt and up to where she connected their lips.
A small sound of surprise, not reluctance, escaped from where they were joined. Her hands came to cradle either side of his face, and Mat thinks that he might’ve cried from the tender action. He wasn’t sure, but he wasn’t going to ask. Hey, it’d been a long day.
“You mean it?”
He realized what he had said, then, eyes wide and somehow his face even more flushed than before. He considered lying, like when Tito had asked who he was texting and he’d said a friend.
But where would that leave him, he wondered?
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, I did.” He added after a beat of silence.
And in those few moments nothing had seemed scarier.
Not when he was 18, getting skipped over by teams in the draft, and that voice in the back of his head had told him that, somehow, everyone had collectively decided to skip Mathew Barzal. Not when he was 19 playing in his first game for the Isles, having to follow up Auston Matthews first NHL game where he had four goals. Four. Fuck.
No, all that was topped by this. By the same fear he’d had earlier when he’d been on the bus, or when he’d arrived at her apartment.
But all of that fear was dissolved in a second after her laugh sounded out in the small bedroom, her eyes crinkling at the edges. She pulled him down towards her, and the sound of her laughter pulled a radiant smile from the hockey player that he felt like hadn’t seen the light of day in a long time.
She rolled over on top of his chest, leaning forward and throwing her arms around his neck. His chain was glinting, now, in the light she had previously been bathed in, and it caught her eye as it rested against his milky complexion.
“You looooove me.” She regarded in a sing-song voice, and Mat rolled his eyes despite the smile growing on his face. She leaned down, and Mathew’s grip on her bare hips tightened, all too aware of the wet spot left on his stomach from her leaking sex.
She mirrored his previous movements down his chiseled body, a regular Adonis in his own right. She left open mouthed kisses, the wet patches from them adding to the thin sheen that covered his body. She made her way down to his boxers, the obvious tent making her stifle a laugh. He caught it though, of course, and rolled his eyes for what seemed like the millionth time.
“Laugh it up, babe. Laugh at my misery.” He commented, to which she only shook her head.
“Patience is a virtue, Mathew.”
“You’re one to talk.”
Well, he had a point there.
So rather than talk, she decided she’d put her mouth to good use. She pulled down his boxers at a painstakingly slow rate, watching as his cock slapped up against his stomach. Her mouth watered at the sight, the tip red and weeping, begging to be attended to. He kicked off the boxers, paying no mind to how they slipped onto the floor, forgotten. She didn’t either, as she was sure he had to have some extra in one of his gazillion bags sitting in her entry way.
Her nails scratched down his stomach, angry red lines puffing up and decorating around the expanse of his skin. They were accompanied by freckles and marks and scars that she could have mapped together with her eyes closed. She knew Mathew like the back of her hand. And with that, came knowing how to make him come undone in her hands.
She started leaving small kisses at the base of his shaft, before swiping the bead of precum from his head down to the rest of him. She pumped her hand a few times, and Mathew let out a strangled moan. She thought he couldn’t get any louder, feeling bad for her neighbors at whatever hour in the night it was, but she was quickly proven wrong.
She licked a long stripe from the bottom to his tip, before taking as much of him into her mouth as she could. She bobbed her head a few times, jacking off whatever she couldn’t fit with her hands. She hollowed her cheeks, and the rise and fall of Mathew’s chest quickened. The sound he let out was animalistic, and it sent another wave of arousal through her body. She moaned involuntarily, and the feeling caused Mathew to buck his hips.
“You’re doing so good, baby. ‘M not gonna last with you going at me- shit- like that.”
He brought a large hand down to the side of her face, lightly stroking her cheek. It was a moment of wholesomeness that reminded them what they were now, what he had said.
Mat could tell she was tired, her pace decreasing. The look in her eyes never changed, though. And as he went to speak to tell her it was okay, and she didn’t have to (and because since it had been so long, he was scared he’d bust his load if she wasn’t careful), she pulled off.
A string of saliva followed, and the sight looked like a thumbnail of a shitty porno. Her eyes were droopy and glazed over, and Mat’s hypothesis was proven correct.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. You don’t have to finish. Let me take care of you.” He repeated his sentiment from earlier. She only shook her head, continuing to jack him off with her hand. Oh. He thought. That’s not what I was expecting.
“S’okay, Matty. Wanna make you feel good.”
She ran her thumb over his tip again, her glassy and swollen bottom lip hanging ajar as she concentrated. The moans he was letting slip free could only be described as pathetic, the 190 pound hockey player putty in her hands.
“I’m gonna cum if you don’t, God, baby, shit! I-If you don’t stop.”
And then she pulled her hand off, and he let out a quick breath at the momentary relief, if that was even the right word. But it was short lived, and she managed to hoist herself up, dragging her folds along his cock, before stabilizing herself with hands on his chest. He slid inside of her, and the sounds they both let out echoed off her walls.
She started moving, and then it was “You’re fuckin’ amazing, you know that? So fuckin’ amazing. My girl, my perfect girl.” He rambled, the events of just that day alone scrambling his mind trying to keep up. Similarly to how she felt earlier, everything was just too much for the poor man. She felt like Heaven around him, and he watched in awe from below her as she moved, enamored by the woman he loves.
As she became more and more tired, her movement slowed, reduced to her grinding herself down on his cock. Mat was barely hanging on, trying to make it last as long as possible. He could tell she was close too, as she squeezed him like a vice, and put her energy into picking up her pace.
“Fuck, Matty. Feels s’good. Love you- shit! I love you so much, baby.” She told him, her eyes closed and her face screwed up as she chased her high. But something snapped in Mathew at her confession, and with a quick “fuck” under his breath, he flipped the two of them without ever leaving her.
He was relentless.
He slammed in and out, and at the sudden change in position and pace, she was blindsided. She thrashed around him, her hands everywhere at once. Her hair, his hair, grasping at his shoulders, scratching down his back. She settled for his biceps, as his hands were planted. One on the right side of her head, the other gripping her hip bone so hard, she was sure it’d bruise.
“It’s only ever been you, baby. I promise you.”
“Shit, Mat!” She cried, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She loosely draped her legs around his middle, allowing him to reach new depths within her. He was fucking her senseless, and they fucking loved it.
“It’ll only ever be you. I love you. Fuck, I love you so much, Y/n.” His hair hung in his eyes as he fought to keep them open. He shook it out of his eyes, wanting to see her as she came in all her glory.
“Love you, Mat. So much, baby. You have no idea.”
His pelvis snapped harder against her, just barely reaching up and grazing her clit in the most exquisite way. The rope in her stomach began to tighten for the third time that night, so close to breaking she could almost taste it.
Actually, she could taste it, she realized. She had been biting down so hard on her bottom lip she could taste the metallic tang on her tongue, and fuck, it was all the more delectable.
“Mat!” It was another exclamation, followed by more babbles. “‘S too much, Matty, can’t do it.” Her voice was small, and despite the nature of the statement, Mat felt his heart flutter.
He shook his head. “Yes, you can, baby. I know you’re tired, but you can do it, Y/n. You’ve got another one in you sweetheart, pull through for me. I’ve got you.”
And never one to disappoint, especially not her Mathew, she did.
She came, and she came hard. But it wasn’t dramatic the way you’d think it’d be, at least not outwardly. Her breathing stopped, her toes curled, and her nails dug into the skin on Barzy’s arms. It wasn’t accompanied by a loud scream, or a drawn out, high pitched moan. It was a breath of relief that left her when she came, her head falling to the side and her eyes closing. A quiet moan of Mat’s name, and she was clamping down on him.
The sweet way his name fell off her tongue, mixed with how she was so damn tight around him as she came, and he was done for. It triggered his own orgasm, and he felt the same feeling of peace wash over him that she had as he spilled into her. He fucked her through it, soft thrusts calming whatever aftershocks they both were experiencing. She had gone limp under him, her eyes opening as she gave him the sweetest smile he’d ever seen.
He stayed in her, lowering himself onto his side, then maneuvering them so she was laying on him. They were a cliché and they knew it, but they couldn’t seem to care. A few moments passed in comfortable silence, before it was broken by Mathew’s scratchy post-sex voice. Swoon.
“So,” he started. She raised a brow, wondering where he was going with this.
“You looooove me, too, then?” He mimicked her tone from earlier, and they broke out in a fit of laughter as she slapped his arm and rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, yeah. I guess you’re alright.” She feigned annoyance, propping herself up on her right arm as she faced the man she loved. Mat scoffed, blowing a strand of hair from his forehead. “Just alright? You’re crazy, lady.”
“But you love me.”
Not a beat passed before “I do.”
She smiled softly, lifting up a hand to run a finger along his jaw. He caught it with his own, never breaking eye contact as he kissed her palm. Again, swoon.
“I know.” She responded, wanting to stay in that moment forever. But, she knew that if she stayed where she was too long, she’d more than likely fall asleep in record time. So, she pressed a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth, which he turned to catch before she could go, pulling her back for a “real” kiss at his protest.
A petulant child, that’s what he is.
She pressed one more to his lips for good measure, before pulling himself off of him. They both let out disgruntled sounds at the sudden losses, and it took all her energy to sit up on the edge of her bed. She felt a strong jaw on her shoulder, and she leaned into it.
“Where you goin’? Leaving me all alone isn’t very nice.” She could hear the frown in his voice, and even though she knew he was joking, it tugged on her heartstrings that little bit.
“Gotta pee.” She said, standing up and walking towards the connecting bathroom. “Sorry baby, no UTIs for me.”
The frown stayed cemented on his face.
“You should be grateful,” she threw over her shoulder, shutting the door. “No UTIs, more fucking, yeah?”
He chuckled at her bluntness, deciding to go and get her some water and maybe a snack. Shit, he didn’t know. What was he supposed to do? Usually when they fucked before, her or Mat would be out the door as soon as possible, still trying to ward off those pesky feelings. But now, he was allowed to feel said pesky feelings, and he’d be damned if he fucked it up.
So, snack. And water? Yeah, water, for sure. He was hungry and thirsty, why wouldn’t she be. He had no idea the way around her kitchen, nor how to, er, actually make anything, so this would be rough. But, first, a pit stop.
He would have walked butt-ass naked into her kitchen, really, but then he remembered Warrior was out there and he didn’t have a need to traumatize that dog any further than he already was.
(It was one time, okay? He didn’t know she had a dog, he’d been asleep on his bed by the TV when they’d gotten to her place. And at the time, Mat was too preoccupied to notice.)
He looked around on the floor for the offending clothing item, slightly grossed out when he did finally find them. It was only for a minute, tops, is what he told himself, as he pulled on the boxers from earlier in the night.
He tiptoed, for literally no apparent reason, through the dark apartment until he found the bag he was looking for. He grabbed what he needed from it, struggling with the zipper while trying to close it, before giving up. On his way back to her room, he gave Warrior a nod and smile, and he swore the mutt gave one back. Okay, actually, on second thought, he remembered the clock on her microwave saying it was 3:18 AM, so, maybe he didn’t.
It was late and he just had the best sex of his life with the woman he loves. Give him a break. So what if he’s delusional and thinks he can communicate with dogs? At least he’s pretty.
When he gets to her room, he pulls on the newer, clean, pair of boxers, setting the other pair he grabbed from his bag on the bed for her when she got out of the bathroom, along with an Islanders shirt that he’d secretly always wanted to see her in. Too soon? Maybe. But after so long yearning for everything domestic and wholesome and good that he was convinced he didn’t deserve with her, he was indulging a little bit. So sue him.
His next stop, snacks. And water, can’t forget the water.
The water was easy enough, he got lucky. He grabbed her “emotional support cup” as she’d called it before when she thought he wasn’t listening, and went over to the fridge. He got a few ice cubes and put them in, and then went over to her Brita. He stood there, pressing down on the little lever, watching the steady stream of water into the cup. It was almost laughable, how he stood there in the dead silence, concentrating so hard. He was determined not to somehow do something wrong, even though it was just pouring a cup of water. Cute.
He checked the pantry once the cup was full, with the lid safely screwed on top. The rustling about caught the attention of Warrior, who hopped down from where he’d been on the couch, moseying on over.
Mat, who still was slightly wary of Warrior, despite the fact the dog would cause him no harm, shook his head at the mutt.
“Sorry, buddy. I don’t have anything for you.”
He turned his head and gave him puppy dog eyes, pulling out all the stops. Mat sighed, looking back to the pantry. He saw a box of Milkbones, and looked back to Warrior, who was egging him on. (They’re telepathically connected, remember?)
He reached in the box, pulling one out, and tossing it down. Warrior gratefully accepted, taking his treat and waltzing off to his bed to chow down. Mat looked in the pantry, going to close the box, when he sees it, his saving grace.
White bread, hallelujah.
He can do toast. Mathew Barzal is a totally capable 25 year old man who can make toast. So, he takes the bag, going over to the toaster. And-
One look at all those fancy buttons, and he’s tapped out.
Okay, it’s okay, he can remember seeing a vending machine on his way into her apartment. Yeah, he remembers her telling him about having to sign off on some HOA form for it, even though she was just renting. Apparently, her landlord hadn’t signed, which made it her job. Whatever, that’s irrelevant.
He figured that there wouldn’t be anybody out in her hallway at 3:23 AM, so he grabbed his coat with his wallet, shrugging it on over his bare back. His slides were somewhere in his hockey bag and the last thing he wanted to do was stink up her whole place by opening that Pandora’s box. So, barefoot it is.
He does his best to sneak out the apartment, leaving the door ajar as he makes the short walk to the vending machine, grateful his search was over. He let out a long sigh as he stood, wondering what to get her.
For himself he decided on a bag of cool ranch Doritos, and a bag of those tiny cookies. For her, he racked every corner of his brain for potential options, before realizing how long he’s taking, and how long he’d been gone. So, not wanting to waste any more time, he elected for one of everything.
He punched in the numbers and paid, attempting to grab them from the machine. Trying to pick up the few that had fallen, he leaned down. His attention was called elsewhere by the ”click!” of a door a few units down. His head snapped to the source of the sound.
“You’ve got to be shitting me.” He muttered under his breath upon what he saw.
A man probably not much older than himself, suitcase and backpack in tow, donned in, you guessed it, a New York Islanders hoodie a lá number 13.
The man had yet to notice the star player down the hall from him, and Mat was considering just making a run for Y/n’s place. But either way, he would have to go past the man, or the man would have to go past Mat to get to the elevator. Maybe he’d take the stairs? He hoped. Shit, who was he kidding, he’s not taking the stairs.
Starting his walk over, the unnamed Islanders fan lifted his head, stopping in his tracks. His jaw dropped, and if it wasn’t purely because of being in the presence of Mat Barzal, he had a hunch what it was.
Said hunch, was that it was due to the fact Mat Barzal was standing in front of him, in an apartment complex definitely not boujee enough for him to be living in, at 3:25 in the morning, naked, except for boxers and some fancy trench coat, holding several bags of snacks.
Mat would’ve laughed at the guys face, but he thought he wasn’t quite in the position to do so.
“Hey, man. How’s it going?” And a stupid bro nod, was all Mathew could manage.
-
While he was facing that debacle, Y/n was having one of her own.
After she’d gone to the bathroom, she decided to try to do her nighttime routine, too. She put on her robe from where it had been hanging in her bathroom, beginning her little routine.
When she emerged 10 minutes later, Mat was nowhere to be seen.
His bags were still by the door, albeit one of them hastily thrown open. Was he leaving and had gotten some clothes and an Uber? Did he have last minute regrets? The door to her place was left open, and an overwhelming sadness began to take over her system. As the tears began to well up, she looked over to Warrior, only to notice him chewing on… a milkbone? How the hell did he get a milkbone?
She sniffled, wiping her sleeve under her nose. She sat down on her couch, looking at where her iced coffee from earlier was still sitting, ¾ of the way empty. The tears started to flow freely again after that, and she stood up, deciding that she should at least shut the door. She didn’t need to deal with a robbery, too.
As she stood and turned, she was met with a very discombobulated and very underdressed Mat trying to shove his way through the door.
“Have a good flight, man. Enjoy Miami!” Mat called over his shoulder to what sounded like her neighbor Gian, based off of the “Thanks bro, good luck this season!” she heard back.
She slapped a hand over her mouth, trying to not bust out laughing at the sight in front of her. Hearing her snickering, he looked up gesturing to the bags in his arms.
“Hungry?” He asked, the smile on his face falling when he saw the red around her eyes. He dropped all the snacks on the couch to his right, making his way over to where she stood.
“Hey, hey, why’re you crying? What’s wrong sweetheart?” He questioned, and his sincerity made her smile widely.
“Nah, I’m all good, don’t worry about it. Just thought you’d left, that’s all…” A pause. “But I see now that you just had a case of munchies, apparently.”
He wrapped his arms around her shoulders pulling her towards his chest. His chin rested on her head, and she closed her eyes, inhaling his scent.
“No, baby. God, no, I’m not leaving. I just wanted to do this whole thing right, and I thought you might be hungry, and I tried to make toast- your toaster is really complex by the way,”
She pulled away from him as he rambled, her smile reaching her eyes.
“And I filled your water and set out clothes for you and I really did try, baby. I didn’t mean to fuck anything up, really.”
She giggled again, taking hold of the shoulders of his jacket, shrugging it off. She folded it over the back of a barstool, then turned back towards Mat.
“And Gian?”
“Oh yeah, he’s cool. Ran into him in the hallway and introduced myself. Going to visit some family in Miami.”
She raised an eyebrow, nodding her head in understanding. She stepped closer, wrapping her arms around his middle.
“So, am I gonna have to compete with him for your attention now whenever you come over?”
He reciprocated the action, one hand coming up to rest on her chin.
“I mean, he’s gonna be gone for two weeks, but after that…” he shrugged, trailing off. She hummed, and he smiled at her, leaning forward. He searched her eyes for any remaining upset, unable to find any, before he pressed his lips to hers. It was sweet and gentle, with not a hint of rush or fervor.
When they pulled apart, she was smiling again. Her hands found their way back to his neck.
“And baby, you’re amazing. You didn’t fuck up anything at all, I promise.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” She whispered, leaning in again to connect their lips. She let her tongue sweep over his bottom lip, biting down just barely before pulling away. She pushed down the sleeves of her robe just a bit, exposing her shoulders. Y/n took his hand, and started walking backwards, letting it slowly slip out of hers as she did.
“Come on, hotshot. Come to bed. Snacks will still be there in the morning.”
She smiled again briefly, before walking towards her room, the robe slipping down as she went. Mat stood watching her in total awe, glued in place, until he was knocked out of his trance.
“Hurry up! And lock the door, too, please!”
He had never obliged to anything quicker in his life.
(And as for the snacks, they were not still there in the morning, thanks to a certain mutt who managed to rip open all the packets on the couch. The next morning was spent at the vet, who had told them Warrior would be fine, just fat. The vet had only said this, though, after Mat had consoled a crying Y/n, who was under the impression he was going to be poisoned.
The rest of the day after that? Making up for lost time.)
FIN.
YO idk if that was good or not i kind of feel like i imagined writing the entire thing and it was a fever dream. but. anyway! if you liked it, be sure to reblog <3 thank u i love u! go eat some protein and drink some water. 
xx, hj
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doc-pickles · 3 months
Text
watching him with those eyes | mat barzal x reader x anthony beauvillier
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summary: after you wear tito's jersey mat decides you need to be punished
warnings: mat is a little bit of an asshole, smut (spanking, fingering, p in v unprotected, degradation, threesome, voyeurism), brief blackh*wks mention
a/n: soooooo I wanted to do 12 days of smutmas but my brain no work so this is my last smutmas fic HAHA unless I somehow regain inspiration before christmas. but I really love this one so uhhhhh have fun and enjoy!
xoxo
nina
You knew it was a risky move, knew you’d piss Mat off. But you couldn’t help yourself, slipping on the #18 jersey before you left your apartment. The Islanders were facing the Blackhawks tonight and despite Mat being your boyfriend Tito was your best friend that you hadn’t seen in months. 
Tito’s face had absolutely lit up when he saw you during warm-ups, skating over to you with a grin. You’d wished him good luck and he’d skated off. 
Then Mat had seen you. And he was not happy. 
Mat wasn’t an overly jealous person but he’d always envied the bond that you and Tito had formed over decades of friendship. You assured Mat that he had nothing to worry about, Tito had introduced you two after all. But you knew that Mat was still on edge. 
After the game you waited for Mat, your feet tapping anxiously against the linoleum as more and more players trickled out of the locker room. When you finally spotted him you plastered on a smile but Mat didn’t return the sentiment to you. He accepted your chaste kiss before tightly gripping your waist and leading you down to the parking garage. 
“Mat-“
“Don’t,” he growls as he presses you into the side of his car. “You think you’re so cute running around with his number on, huh?”
You gasp as Mat’s fingers wrap around your throat, the pressure making you blink back tears. 
“You’ve been naughty baby. Do you remember what happens to naughty girls,” Mat asks as he squeezes just a bit tighter, your eyes rolling up to meet his. 
“They get punished,” you choke out just as Mat lets go of your throat. 
“Get in the fucking car,” Mat spits out as he gets into the driver's seat. You obey, silently following and buckling up as he pulls out of the parking garage. 
The entire drive is silent and seems to take twice as long as usual. There’s no casual conversation or music, just you and Mat as he drives you to his apartment.
You bolt from the car as soon as Mat puts it into park. When he catches up with you his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you into his chest. 
“Oh baby… You can’t fucking run from me,” Mat coos in your ear, his breath fanning across your skin. “You want me to take you over my knee?”
“Mat…” you groan as he slides his hand down to cup your heat over your leggings. “We’re in the hallway, anyone could walk by.”
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Someone watching me take this sweet pussy,” Mat growls and bites into your shoulder making you gasp. “Mmm, that’s my girl. C’mon baby, time for your punishment.”
Mat drags you down the hallway and makes quick work of unlocking his door. As soon as you’re inside he’s got you up against the wall, pressing his hips into yours as his hand finds your throat again. 
“My baby wants to be watched? Want someone to know how much of a whore you are,” you moan against Mat as he brushes his lips against yours. You can feel his fingers ghosting across your leggings, coming closer to the apex of your thighs. “Yeah, you’re a little slut, aren’t you? Wearing my best friend’s jersey? You want Tito to watch me fuck you so he knows you’re mine?”
“Holy shit Mat,” you cry out as he finally cups your pussy through your leggings and squeezes your throat tighter. “Fuck! Yes, I want it! Please, baby!”
A dark chuckle leaves Mat as he lets you go, your chest heaving as you stare up at him with wide-blown pupils. 
“Careful what you ask for baby,” he whispers against your lips before throwing you over his shoulder and walking you down the hallway to his bedroom. 
Mat sits on the bed, not giving you a chance to acclimate before he throws you over his knee. Your heart is racing as he harshly tugs your leggings and panties down, exposing your ass to him. 
“You’re so fucking wet baby,” Mat groans as he runs his fingers through your slick folds. “God, is this all for me?”
The only thing you can do is moan, savoring the feeling of his fingers teasing your entrance and the fact that you’re completely exposed as you lay across his lap. 
“Or is it all for Tito?” Mat asks as he shoves two fingers into your dripping cunt. “God I bet you’d love to be watched by him. Let him hear how fucking wet you are?”
“Mat,” you cry as he plunges into you again, his other hand coming down to slap your ass. Your body is already overstimulated and the night has just started. “Oh my god!”
Mat delivers two more smacks, his fingers still inside of you as he doles out your punishment. Your breath comes out in whimpers as he holds you in place, his hand continuously smacking your ass and sending electric jolts through your body. He pauses his slaps, instead moving his fingers in and out of your cunt making the most lewd sounds.
“So loud, so wet. You’re doing so good” Mat chuckles as he continues to fuck you with his fingers. A pathetic moan leaves you as you thrash around on his lap. “Putting on such a good show, showing Tito how wet you are for him, how you’re a slut for him. God baby he looks like he wants to eat you up.”
Your head immediately pops up at Mat’s words, stilling when you meet Anthony’s eyes from across the room. He’s standing in the doorway of Mat’s bedroom, eyes wide as he takes in the scene before him. You flung over Mat’s lap, your dripping cunt on full display, and his name on your back.
“Tito-”
Mat shoves your head back down before either you or Anthony can say anything. His hand comes down on your ass and you can’t help the whine you let out, “Love it when you’re loud, baby. Show Tito how good you are for me.”
The thought of Mat’s best friend watching you has you on full alert, your body thrumming with excited energy as your boyfriend continues to spank you. His fingers come back to your cunt, pushing in roughly and catching your breath on a gasp.
“So close, Mat,” you cry out, clenching around his fingers as he continued to mercilessly fuck you. “Please, baby!”
“Come for me baby, let Tito see how pretty you look when you coat my fingers with your cum,” Mat’s words trigger your orgasm, a series of moans and gasps falling from your lips as your hips jerk against him. “That’s it, baby. Doing so good for me. Fuck Tito, she’s so tight. Squeezing the life out of my fingers.”
A low groan escapes Tito and the sound makes your pussy clench against Mat. He lets a chuckle out before pulling his fingers out of you and giving you one more slap to your already red ass. Without warning he throws you onto the bed and you scramble to your knees before he can sit up.
“All fours baby,” Mat commands as he pushes your shoulders down. “Want Tito to see your face when I fuck you.”
Falling onto your hands you look up and meet Tito’s eyes. He’s sitting in the chair Mat has positioned in the corner of the room now, eyes never leaving you as Mat rips off your panties and leggings. His erection is straining in his dress pants, the sight fueling your aroused state.
“You eye fucking my best friend over here?” Mat whispers in your ear, his body encasing you as his hard cock ruts against your core. “Knew you were a fucking slut. You want him to fuck you instead of me, don’t you?”
“Mat, baby-,” you gasp as he pulls back, his hands gripping your waist tightly. His dick is prodding at your entrance and you thrust your hips back into him, eyes still locked with Tito’s. “Want him to watch you fuck me. Please, baby.”
At your words Tito groans loudly, hand coming to palm his erection as his head lolls backward in lust. Mat pushes his cock into you with a rough thrust and you’re crying out in pleasure. Your hips buck back into him as he bottoms out, his hands on your waist squeezing hard enough that you know you’ll have bruises in the morning. 
“So fucking tight, so perfect for me,” Mat groans as he thrusts into you, one of his hands slapping your ass again. “Look so pretty taking my cock with his number on your back.”
You realize that you’re still wearing Tito’s jersey and you let out a breathy moan of pleasure, your hips thrusting back into Mat. When you look up to meet Tito’s eyes you nearly collapse at the sight of him watching you and Mat with his hard dick in his hand. He’s not as thick as Mat, but his length makes up for it. Tito meets your gaze and you groan at the connection there.
“Beau, oh fuck,” you cry out as Mat slaps your ass again. “Oh my god, so good baby. Fucking me so good for Beau.”
Both men loudly groan at your words, Mat’s thrusts speeding up as Tito jerks his cock harder. The sight and feeling of both of them has you reeling, your overstimulated body bowing to Mat’s hold on you. Your eyes are locked on Tito’s as he watches the two of you fuck with reckless abandon.
“So close Matty,” you gasp out as Mat’s hand wraps around you to shove roughly at your clit. “Baby, I n-need Tito. Please Mat. Fuck! Want you both to cum on me.”
Carefully you watch as Tito meets Mat’s gaze. You can’t see your boyfriend from this angle but you know they’re silently deliberating something as Mat continues to fuck you. Without a word Tito stands and comes to the edge of the bed, hard cock still out as he jerks it roughly just inches from your face.
“I knew my little slut would want this,” Mat breathes out as he pulls your hips up, tugging at your hair with one hand so you’re face to face with Tito. “You want him so bad, you take him. Show him what I get every fucking night.”
There’s only a moment of hesitation between the two of you before you lean forward and lock your lips with Tito’s, one hand coming up to wrap in your hair while the other continues to jerk his cock. You moan into his mouth, reveling in the feel of him on your lips and Mathew pounding away at your pussy.
“Fuck,” you gasp against Tito’s lips. “So close… So… Fuck baby please!”
Mat works your clit furiously as you cry out your release into Tito’s mouth, his hand in your hair pulling your head back so you were facing him head-on. Suddenly he drops your hair right as Mat pulls out of you and both of their cries of pleasure fill the room. With a pleased smile, you realize that they’d both dirtied the back of your jersey with their releases, your knees giving way so you can collapse on the bed as they both finish themselves off.
You’re dazed for a few minutes until you feel a warm washcloth between your legs just as Tito crouches in front of you, wiping your hair away from your face, “Let me take this off of you, yeah?”
Tito pulls the jersey off of you, throwing it into the laundry basket as Mat finishes wiping you up. You reach up for Tito but he brushes you off, kissing your forehead instead of holding you like you had implied, “Early flight, I have to head back to the hotel.”
With a slow grin you watch as Mat and Tito say goodbye to each other, not an ounce of awkwardness between them despite what they’d just shared. After the front door closes Mat crawls into bed next to you and pulls your naked body against his.
“How you feeling baby,” Mat asks into your shoulder, lips brushing your skin. “Like your surprise?”
“Mmmm yes thank you,” you grin as you lean up to kiss him, one hand tangling in his hair. “But I like just having you here, baby. I love you.”
“Love you too,” Mat whispers as he strokes a hand across your cheek. “Should I just block off the whole weekend next time Tito is in town then?”
“Mathew!”
209 notes · View notes
abilouwrites · 5 months
Text
BARZAL BABY FEVER
Mat BARZAL 😻🤠
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“Oh lindy loulou” I grin sweetly at the three month old as I hold her into my arms, smothering the sweet baby in kisses, “oh ain’t you jus the cutest lil gumdrop to ever be”
I used to hate when my southern accent would shine through but I’ve grown to not mind it as much, “yes you are, yes you are!” I rock her slowly shuffling back and fourth, Noah looks at me and I know he wants his a baby back but I’m not ready to give her up just yet.
“Y/n please, Linds needs her nap” He begs quietly as I continue playing with his daughter, tickling her tummy and watching as she grins and laughs a little, “Mat tell your girlfriend to give me my baby back”
He doesn’t respond, sitting and staring as I let her suckle on my finger, “Noah, Shh” I whisper gently as I make my way back to the couch, once she starts to fuss I stand back up and keep rocking her, “she’ll nap, don’t you worry”
“Just support her head” He nervously goes to stand but I turn away from him, “y/n please”
“I have little siblings, don’t worry” I wave him off, bouncing her up so she’s got her head on my shoulder.
Mat comes over to me and stands behind me gently kissing her forehead and nose, “can I hold her”
I frown but reluctantly let him hold Lindy, even though she’s not my baby, “she smells so good” I whine out as Mat holds the small infant.
My heart swells as I watch him cradle the little girl, maybe because I’m ovulating or maybe because I saw the ring in the back of his dresser, “she’s just the sweetest lil gooseberry”
Noah nods and I watch Sarah slowly creep outside of the bedroom, “god I’m so sorry I slept through it all” she apologizes rubbing her eyes, “can I get you anythin? Water? Tea, maybe coffee” she asks
“No we’re alright, you sleep well?” I ask, patting down the couch for her to come sit
“Yeah, I needed that. If you two want to babysit”
“Yes” Mat and I say without hesitation
Noah and his wife look at eachother with an excitement and love I adore.
“Next Saturday?”
Lindy and I are laying on the couch of Mat and I’s apartment, she’s playing with the little gold shine on my earrings. Mat left for an hour to hit the gym but he promised to bring back lunch.
“Hey cuties” Mat fawns as he walks back into the apartment. Setting a bag of food down onto the island table, “when’s her nap?” He asks quietly as Lindy rests her head on my chest and sprawls out on me.
“In a few minutes, but I wanna get her sleepy before I put her down” I tell him. Mat nods slowly picking her up, whispering softly as he gently places her down in the little crib Noah lent us.
I get up and make my way to the food mat bought, “good workout?” I ask as he quickly devours a large fry and a few of my chicken nuggets.
“Ya” he whispers out, “so uh this is really out of the blue.. do you think kids are in the cards for us?”
“I think so, at least I would really.. really love to have my own baby. We can’t keep Lindy forever” I confess, “I’m sure once they’re back to a regular sleeping schedule they’ll miss her”
“With the way Noah’s blowing up my phone lately I think they already miss her”
334 notes · View notes
behoright · 11 months
Text
console me l m. barzal
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how it feels to rest / on your patient lips
summary: as angry as mat is after the season loss, he cannot hide it from you. mostly plotless smut
wordcount: 4.6k
warnings: minors DNI! 18+ only. smut, sexual situations that include rough sex, degrading language and behaviors, pain/pleasure dynamics, pet names, consent break/check, bodily fluids. mentions of size difference and love lol.
a/n: for all my sad, islanders girlies. masterlist is fixed! muah.
read me please:  i cannot say this any more clearly: this is not for everyone. read at your discretion. the warnings are stated as clearly as i can my loves. my inbox is always open to have any discussion about writing, relationships, sex, bdsm and kink. if this makes you uncomfortable or simply is not your cup of tea, move on my dear. love u guys always.
⊹    🎧     ⁾⁾ 
It really took only a day to figure out.
As much as he tried to hide it, leave it at the rink.
Anger. 
Mat had never been so pissed before. 
For once, he knew that he had given it his all. 
He had sacrificed, time and time again. 
Played through sickness, injuries, birthdays, and special events. 
Harder than ever before.
Despite knowing that everything passes, he couldn’t shake the thought, or perhaps the fact, that there had been other factors that cost the team the cup. 
Things out of his control. 
And it drove him to the edge every night.
Having to see his teammates get more disappointed with every passing second on the ice. 
Knowing that their dream was slipping away from them, no matter how much he had clawed and fought to hold on. 
He spent extra time at the gym, on the ice, hours after the last painful loss, just to attempt to get rid of the anger. 
But it wasn’t working. 
Instead, it just fueled the apparent neverending and burning cycle.
The last thing he wanted to do was bring his negativity home. 
Back to you. 
To the safe haven you had both built so meticulously. 
The only person that stood by his side, in every sense of the word, didn’t deserve to take the brunt. 
However, you could see the cracks. 
He was very good at veiling it, but not good enough for you. 
The past couple days had brought you a huge sense of gratitude, knowing you were in a relationship that stripped your souls and bodies. 
Fully being yourselves at all times. 
So, as you packed to begin your various summer travels, you knew you had no other choice.
Something was pounding, deep from inside you, to open this door for you two. 
You stood in your shared room, watching Mat’s muscular back crouched down in the walk in closet as he messily threw his shirts in his luggage.
“Mat?” you called him, voice shaky.
“Hmm, babe?” he asked, still packing. 
“How are you feeling?”
The question wasn’t anything new, a domestic ritual you two had to keep your connection based in truth wholly. 
Since you had both promised to listen without any stories or distractions in exchange for the complete truth, every single time, it had become easier to share.
“Well, love…” he sighed, not daring to face you as his face stiffened, your question bringing up his most repressed feelings. “I’m angry. I’m fucking frustrated at how it all ended, you know?”
“You are?” you said, walking towards him, picking at the skin on your hands nervously.
“Yeah, baby. It’s okay, I mean, it’ll pass. But I’m angry.”
“Take it out on me.” you blurted out, strong in your stance and words, now only a couple of feet behind him. “Fuck me as hard as you can.”
Mat stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widening as his mind emptied, only being able to stare at the half empty suitcase in front of him. 
Whether he liked to admit it or not, he knew that you could see right through him. 
There was no hiding from the woman he loved. 
“I know that we’ve talked about this before but… are you sure you can handle it?” he questioned, turning around to look at you. 
“I know I can, Mat.”
“Baby…”
The overhead warm light surrounded your head like a halo as he looked up at you. 
He wondered, during a poetic moment, how his angel could be giving herself over to him like this. 
“I’m asking for it.” you said, taking a step closer to him. “Can you handle it?”
For a moment he forgot that his sweet angel was no such thing behind closed doors. Ever since the first night, he saw that dark fire inside you, and it hadn’t gone out in years. 
Mat was the perfect fan to your flames.
“Oh, so it’s like that huh?” Mat answered, his lips curling up into a smirk as he stood up to tower over you. “Will you tell me if you need me to stop?”
“Yes.” you gulped as you two stood just inches apart. “I remember my word.”
“You do, huh?” he asked as you saw his feet take one last step towards you, the fabric of his shirt ghosting over yours.
“I can take it.” you repeated, getting lost in his eyes as you looked up into his dark eyes.
“Yeah, we can take it, right, baby?” he uttered, his fingers wrapping around the sides of your neck as his eyes looked down upon you. “We fucking can.”
His lips finally met yours, Mat’s tongue swiping feverishly on your bottom lip before invading your mouth, drippingly meeting yours in a heated makeout session.
The belligerence of his kiss sent a moan reberverating inside his open mouth. 
Mat loved to make out. He could do it for hours, until his cock began to twitch restlessly in his denim. 
He opened his mouth fully, letting you invade each other messily. 
Lately, he had taken it as far as to spit in your mouth. Not forcefully, but just letting a trail of spit drip from the tip of his tongue into your throat, the height difference coming to his advantage.
It felt so fucking primal to him that it always sent you flying against a wall everytime he’d see the look of passion and satisfaction in your eyes after you swallowed his saliva.
“Is this what you’ve been thinking about? All those times I was heated, venting at you?”
he asked, forcing you to take steps back into the bedroom, still holding you tightly, the tips of his fingers pushing against the ridges of your scalp. 
“Yes.” you whispered into a kiss. The sensual murmur drove him to bite your bottom lip, pull it towards him as he stopped your motions.
“Oh, what is wrong with you, baby? That’s so fucking bad.” he said, watching the bite swell up exquisitely as you smiled, enticing him into more kisses. 
More spit, boiling into each other and pushing each other unconsciously as you two ondulated in your heat. He began to shove himself intensely against you, getting more of those moans he loved so much. 
“You can’t even be quiet when I kiss you.” he said, shaking his head slowly as his hand came to rest on the front of your neck. He flinched backwards when you attempted to kiss him again. 
It was his bedroom now.
“Come here.” he barked, sitting down on the bed. “This will shut you up.”
He didn’t have to repeat himself before you kneeled in front of him, not even giving him a chance to undo his pants before your mouth salivated over him. He rested his long fingers on your shoulder, almost keeping you tamed as he pulled out his erection.
“Eager, eager girl.” he chuckled, watching you leap onto him.
You wished you could take him entirely the second your tongue met the salty precum that had dribbled down his shaft, but that had never been a possibility. 
Unbeknownst to you, Mat fucking loved it. 
He adored that you struggled to take him, that you wanted so hard to swallow him whole at a first try. 
His head fell back, exposing his thick adam’s apple as it thumped in his throat, Mat trying to hide his gulps every time your lips wrapped around him lower and lower. 
You knew just how to please him, swirling your tongue and hollowing your cheeks just at the right minute spots that still took his by surprise every single time.
Mat felt your desperation as you kept taking him down, so eager to please him. For a second, it enchanted him, filling him with gratitude that he had a partner that so badly wanted to destress him. 
However, it was short-lived.
It was not what you wanted, or what he needed.
“Fuck.”
It felt good, his toes slowly beginning to curl as he felt strings of precum coat the back of your throat, but the more he channeled the feeling that he had pushed away for so long, the more restless he became.
Every time you gagged, your muscles would clench around him, shocking him with exhilarating stimulation.
“Sit up. Now.” he said, strictly, jumping out of his experience. You tentatively moved away from him, the only thing connecting you two now being a sloppy trail of saliva.
“Baby, I-, I-...” you said, uncertainly.
“You what? Hmm?” he asked, undressing as you stared at him dumbfounded. 
Throughout the years, Mat had never sounded so stern in the bedroom as he did now. 
“You asked for angry Mat, didn’t you?” he continued, tapping your head demeaningly in an effort to sit you up. “Beggars can’t be choosers, doll.”
The register in his voice was forceful and humiliating enough to send your desire running down the inside of your thighs, his muscular hands working on practically ripping your clothes off so harshly that he had thrown you off balance a couple of times.
Your heart began to race in anticipation as he silently threw the half-trashed garments through the room. 
He was decisive, precise in his actions, and it made you slightly trepid.
Prolepsis and nerves mixing acidly in your stomach; you knew you had the choice to revoke consent anytime, but you were grounded enough to know that Mat was the safest man to do this with.
Apart from working up to it for months now, and seeing him slowly come out of his shell and let go further every time he got you to himself behind closed doors, you knew how much you wanted this. 
Your body knew as well, your blood rushing rapidly to your cunt as he kept grazing against your skin, snapping the back of your bra before discarding it mindlessly. You could feel the flames of his subjugated feelings simmering again, coming to the surface the more he got out of his head and into his body, his breath becoming deeper and hotter against your skin, breathing out frustration with low, vibrational groans.
“Get on the bed.” he yapped as soon as you were fully naked, his hand pushing you a tad bit too potently onto your bed; so much so that you naturally rested your sweaty limbs on the blankets on all fours.
“Look how wet you are. You’re not embarrassed?” he spit out, running his finger up your slit sloppily as he set himself behind you. “I haven’t even touched you, Y/N.”
He was just a hair over the line, authoritative in his colloquy and pinpointing his acts precisely to get you where he wanted. 
He didn’t care to run himself on your slit, not tonight, his cock still dripping with your thick spit. He thrusted entirely into you, his pounding head coming in contact with your cervix instantly, making your body barely jolt forward. 
“You should be fucking ashamed, Y/N, not moaning.” he barked, as he began to move painfully slow. His thick length, running in and out of your tight walls at a lethargic pace. 
Still, feeling every inch so powerfully split you apart with no preparation, the ridges of his member and his veins skimming your engorged insides ripped moans out of you like never before. 
“You just love being a fuck toy for me, don’t you.” he said, roughly intensifying the grip on your hips as he gradually sped up his movements. He sounded just as rough, doing his best to hold back any signs of satisfaction, but it wasn’t easy. He had made you into a mess so quickly and it mostly came down to his demeanor. 
Ever since he met you, he knew he’d treat you right and respectfully, only you.
He never cared to seem friendly to other girls, truthfully; because he had you. 
The only girl that had naturally commanded such a soft love and tenderness out of him. It was almost ironic to him how the tougher he was with you in between the sheets, the more you melted. 
And god, did he love to see you like this.
Spread vulnerably and already on the brink after a handful of thrusts. 
It drove him mad, struggling to keep any self-control just to have you on a tittering edge. 
But feeling you drip around him, your yearning for him ebbing and flowing out of your pussy as it mixed with the spit that you’d left on his cock, now all of it mixing and coating both of you. 
“Yeah, my little doll.” he said, masking his exasperation as he found a steady rhythm that made your ass recoil delightfully against his pelvis, the chiseled V that framed his cock pounding hard into your flesh as you began to see stars.
Your mouth was stuck open, wanting his call out his name miserably but finding it impossible as the tension kept building within you, tightening your pussy all around and sending shivers down his back as his legs began to tense, inch by inch.
He groaned deeply, squeezing his eyes shut and striving to pivot on that feeling he adored so much, all the sensations that came with being buried deep inside you. 
But all he found was that anger.
The emotion he had tried to leave at work, to get past.
The one that you had noticed.
For good reason, because it was unignorable.
And so he focused on it, the frustration that he had accumulated for months beginning to expand and find its way insidiously through every vessel, every corner of his being. His jaw clenched, the more he let it take over him, the more pleasure would grow, passing from you to him and burning brightly in his belly.
The hinges of the bed creaked and slammed against the wall, his bedframe scratching against his beloved wooden floor as his ears were blessed with your saccharine moans, leaving you unexpectedly and unplanned. 
Your body knew how to take him precisely as his thrusts moved you forward, encouraging all the natural sounds to come out of you instinctively. 
He was afraid that if he let go of your hips that he would lose it. 
He was afraid that he’d pound you right into the mattress; instead, he had a set intention to make this last, to see how far he could take you.
Mat had never heard you sound so beautiful, he thought, just as his rage came to a peak; he could feel his joints begin to sore as he gave it his all, unwilling to stop and let go, fully zoned into unloading his stress. 
He never knew it would bring you so much bliss as he looked down and saw the consequences, heavenly squelching echoing against his growls. He knew you were losing it, micro mannerisms in your body letting him see that you were reaching your orgasm hastily. 
He didn’t need to see your face.
He knew that that familiar blush had knocked at your door, covering your cheeks expansively as your moaning got more high-pitched and frenetic, your pussy twitching around his moving cock. 
“Slow down, you’re making a fucking mess.” he commanded, smugly knowing it would allow it to rip through you, just as it did. 
His knuckles turned white just as yours did, the grip on your sheets fatally unyielding as you let go, coming over Mat. 
The pleasure sparking every synapse in your brain, the cozy feeling flashing through you over and over again as he kept fucking, still roughly and aggressively. 
“You’re fucking gushing.” he said, brave enough to let a hand come down, hard on your ass. The nonchalant tone of disgust in his voice made your whole body light up, tiny bumps forming on your skin at his words as you began to come down from your orgasm.
Mat kept relentlessly, only speeding up, just edging at the border of being too much. As he hit the same spot over and over again, forcefully, your limbs became weak, succumbing to the tremoring that Mat was sending through your system. 
The more you came on him, the more degrading he’d become, periodically spitting onto your core. You knew it wasn’t for any functional purpose more than for humiliating pleasure, giving you everything you craved and more. You couldn’t ask for more, his groans and insults filling up the room; however, the needier you acted, the more Mat would crack under you. 
And the more you pretended you didn’t notice it, the harder your eyes would roll back. 
“You’re so fucking loud, god damn. I’d tell you to shut up, but I know you can’t do it, you’re so heated up.”
Your muscles started to twitch faintly as he snuck his hand around you to rub your clit vigorously, pushing against your skin with sadistic pressure. As much as you tried to get any words of warning out, your body betrayed you, falling pathetically flush against the mattress, the only thing leaving you a whimper. 
The movement wasn’t surprising to you; you had noticed the build-up and distress signals a while ago but had stupidly given in to the thrill instead. 
For Mat, however, it was a different story.
Seeing you tremble against his milky sheets, writhing around slowly and whimpering had him worried immediately. He pulled out swiftly before turning you around.
Thankfully, your eyes found each other, giving him an encouraging sign of lucidity from you.
“Look into my eyes. Are you okay?” he said, clenching his fingers underneath your chin. 
“M’kay.” 
Through blurry vision, you were able to find his dark gaze, regardless of how he was touching your face. The grip on your cheek was so protective and yet you couldn’t ignore the hedonism in his touch.
“What is it? I’m not going to keep fucking you if you’re lying to me.” he said, harshly.
Your brain had melted, completely caved into him, his energy and touch that had brought you to this place so quickly. The unfamiliar floaty feeling neighbored you as you began to tranquilize your boyfriend.
“I’m not lying.” you muttered lazily, gaining enough strength to prop yourself up on your elbows, your nose now touching his. “It just feels so good, Mat.”
Your confession took Mat by surprise. 
His worst fear was taking it all too far, unwillingly hurting you in any way, whether that be physically or otherwise. 
All the same, here you were, in all of your splendor under him, shaking from pleasure. 
It didn’t take long to realize that perhaps he had induced some sort of high, if that was possible.
“You need a kiss?” he asked, his eyes still diligently studying your face. “You need a kiss, don’t you, yeah, come here.”
It wasn’t frenzied or fiery, and still, it told him everything he needed to know.
“That’s all? Better?” he looked at you once more, running his mental checklist.
Eyes were good, skin not too flushed, she can kiss normally, and speak. Not dehydrated or pale.
“Much better.”
The transparency in your speech set in stone what he had thought of.
The words that so easily came out of him, his mannerisms and gestures had sent you haywire, quivering with vibrant intensity, the bliss forcing its way out of your pores, steaming from your skin.
“Good job.” he coaxed, mentally patting himself on the back with a smirk as you fell back down onto the cloudy mattress with a dreamy sigh, a hazy look fixated on him.
Drunk on pleasure, he thought, snickering.
“I bet you feel so dirty, don’t you?” Mat said, his chest heaving with warm sweat dripping from his stubble down onto his pecs. Vulnerability surrounded you both, your eyes running upon each other’s bodies. Taking this moment to pause made sure you were attending to each other fully and completely, the desire still consuming you thoroughly. In the quietness, Mat took his fingers and began running them down your abdomen, barely grazing your clammy skin. 
“I asked you a question, doll.” he said, moving his touch again up your centerline. You could only nod, his fingertips electrifying you with eternal bliss as they found their resting place on your plump lips. 
“Are you having trouble with your words?” he said, breathlessly mocking you before you stuck your tongue out, soaking his digits by letting them sit on you. 
After all, Mat didn’t think he could break any further. 
Until then. 
Seeing you embrace the feeling gave him the reassurance that he was subconsciously looking for.
He was incredulous at your actions, sticking your tongue out fully, with no shame or guilt, and only for him. 
Letting your spit absorb into his calloused skin, while more saliva pooled visibly at the back of your throat. 
Disgustingly.
And it made his throbbing cock twitch, heedlessly slapping against your cunt in a wet motion. 
“Fuck, angel.”
He pushed it further by entering your mouth and your pussy simultaneously, a choked moan surrounding his hand as your eyes flew back.
“That’s my fucking girl.” he said, his eyebrows furrowed as he wasted no time in his fucking, militantly filling you fully again. “Doesn’t it make you feel so good, baby?”
“It does.” you moaned, obediently answering his every question and request.
“Doesn’t it feel so fucking good to be so dirty for me?” he asked, flush taking over him again. 
It was so delightful to see him let go, fully, just as he thought the same about you. 
“So nasty, such a sick little girl.” he continued. “Turn around, come here.” 
Mat sat back on his heels, guiding you to sit on his cock. 
The will was stronger than logic, your thighs quivering as you sunk down on him. 
Mat always hit deeper at this angle, his cock bulging out on your lower tummy as your ass came flush with him.
“You’re so bad, so fucking bad. And look at you, you don’t even care.” he said, moving your hair to the side as his lips grazed against the shell of your ear.
“What would everyone say if they saw you acting like this, huh? Begging to take me after I’m so mean to you. After I slap you, choke you, and spit on you. After I say the most degrading fucking shit to you, you don’t care. It makes your panties drenched, doesn’t it?”
Mat’s hands ran up past your tummy and found a tight hold on your tits, variating between letting them bounce in his palm and gripping them so desperately that it left marks on you. Your chests moved in synch, up and down with your motions; you let your head fall back on his shoulder as you unavailingly rebounded briskly, tightening just at the perfect moment, when your opening came in touch with the delicious curve between his pelvis and the base of his cock. 
“Just as I fucking thought, you can’t even hold back.” he said, grinding ever so slightly against you. The recognizable feeling started to take over you for the millionth time, candied moans causing Mat to jolt against you unexpectedly and thrust deeper.
“You’re going to cum again, aren’t you?” he asked, slapping one of your breasts. “Your body gives you away so easily, angel face.”
He was solid under you, your loving foundation as more juices ran out of you, covering his thighs in sticky squirt, your whole being quivering in delight with his arms instinctively holding you through it. 
“That’s because you’re mine, yeah?” 
Your eyes, stuck on the ceiling, recognized just how close his face was to yours, gaze fixated on your expression as it furrowed and sweated the incessant orgasm. 
“Yeah, I don’t even have to fucking ask.” 
Mat kept talking, kept grinding, as his hands got more desperate, undecided between all the layers of skin and flesh. The more he focused on you, the more he felt like he couldn’t hold back any longer, and as much as he felt that most of the night, he knew that the simple intemperance that had built inside him was about to burst. 
“Look at you. You need more? You always fucking do.” he coaxed, settling his left hand on your throat as your whole body kept aching, spasming sweetly on top of him. 
Totally uncontrolled. 
Unaware of what liquids were leaving you and what noises you were making. 
Your brain only handling and pining for pleasure. 
More and more. 
“It’s never fucking enough for you, is it? You love it when I cross the line with you, you needy, needy girl.” he said, his grip on your throat tightening slightly enough to make your dotted vision fill with sparkles. 
Your head snapped up as your abdomen contracted, almost painfully sore, finally letting you breathe deeply as your body gave you a second to recuperate. 
Tears involuntarily left the corners of your eyes, perhaps from the delectation of it all, the intensity, the overwhelm, or the tiredness. 
“It feels so, so good. You make me feel so good.” you managed to find the strength to whisper against Mat’s lips before letting yours fall on top of his in a loving kiss. 
“Oh, god, you’re going to make me cum, baby.” 
Mat’s voice quivered, as he stared into you; he had never breathed deeper and yet hyperventilated at the same time, just as he'd never felt so much rage and frustration mixed with pleasure all at once. 
“Like that, like that, like that.” he said, through gritted teeth. “Fucking look at me.” 
He grabbed your chin roughly, your face pouting under his touch in the cutest way, he thought. “Like that, baby, fuck.”
Mat exclaimed loudly as he colvulsed forward, his cum filling your tight hole with a growl so deep that you felt yourself vibrate at the power in his voice. You sloppily kept jumping on his dick, every single muscle of his being flexing in concentration and gratification as his warm seed seeped inside you and overflowed, running down his hips before he had the chance to pull out. 
“Oh, fuck, baby.” he moaned, breathlessly. You finally fell, completely limp, into the puddle that he made you in since the beginning. 
“That’s okay, that’s okay, fall into my arms.” Mat reassured, still firing under you. “You did so good. You were so, so good, angel.”
Mat had enough of a size advantage on you to manhandle you, this time turning you both onto your sides after a couple of quiet moments, keeping his cock warm still inside your folds. 
“I love you, I love you, baby. So much. Thank you, thank you. Come here.” he whispered against you, running his hand through your locks as he pulled you closer to him by your waist. 
“Are you good, baby?” he said, watching you nod with a sweet smile on your face. “Why are you crying?”
“It just felt so good, babe.” you reassured him, turning slightly to play with his shining chain that sat damply on his collarbones. 
“I would never hurt you, yeah? You’re safe with me.” he whispered into your cheek in between kisses. “I got you always, babe. Nothing’s going to hurt you while I’m here.”
“I know, baby, I love you.” you said, your eyes into his. “Are you okay, Mat?”
“Oh, baby, yes, yes I’m okay don’t worry. Was I too rough? Too mean? You can tell me, love.”
“No, no, it was perfect.” you repeated. You’d say it as many times as it was needed. 
“Good. You were perfect.” he said. 
You didn’t know, but he thought the same. Reassurance had no limit for him.  
“I see you, I see you fully and I love you, I love everything about you.”
“I love you more, Mat.” you said in between kisses. “Do you feel better now?”
“Oh, baby. So much fucking better.”
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hazybisou · 7 months
Text
❛ DO THE WRONG THING ❜
💋👥 remove my ring, and do the wrong thing with you babe
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summary - y/n finds herself in a secret affair with her next-door neighbor mat, knowing her husband is the sweetest guy she’s ever met.
pairing - f!married!reader x mat barzal
warnings - cheating, alludes to sex, a little bit into a sex scene (just the beginning)
side note - this was based off of a song called do the wrong thing by trish toledo! i don’t support cheating but in this case i must 👍��� also the reader’s husband is a sweatheart so i feel bad for doing this to him and but he doesn’t really show up in this and ya know. yuhhh. also college is better then i thought and my roommate is really nice and chill like she’s amazing and a girl’s girl. (this shit went way too far during the first small sex part and i immediately regretted it and i hate it so much that i will never be writing like that again)
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the moment she saw him, she knew she was fucked. he was fine as hell so of course it was hard to resist him. maybe that’s why she would find herself in his bed every once in a while, his arm wrapped around her waist, the covers of the bed over them, only covering them up to their waists. she’s married for christ’s sake. yet she was here with a man who hasn’t her husband.
y/n had met her husband, nathan, during her freshman year of college. they were great friends at first and then they kissed one night at a party. y/n was tipsy while nathan was sober. he knew they shouldn’t have kissed, especially considering the fact that she was drunk but that they were friends. best friends. but she put her lips on his.
they began dating a year later, the kiss never spoken of until a couple months after it had occurred. nathan confessed to her that he had feelings for her and she told him she did as well. it was true. she loved him. she loved him so much that they went ahead and got married at the age of 22 and 23.
y/n hated herself for what she was doing. she knew it was wrong of her to go and cheat on nathan like he was nothing. but mat made it difficult to resist.
he charmed her when he first met her one morning, on his way out to practice. she was just arriving from her morning workout and he was leaving for his. he went over and introduced himself.
“i’m mat.” he stuck out a hand and she shook it.
“y/n.”
mat stared at her for a quick second and noticed the way her chest went up and down. his eyes couldn’t help but travel down to her boobs and the rest of her body. he looked at her in eye and smiled.
“you’re a very beautiful women, you know that?” mat told her and she froze.
she didn’t know what to say. “i’m sorry?”
mat chuckled. “you’re cute. listen i got to go but if you ever need something just knock on my door, alright? i’m just next door.” he walked away after that and y/n just stood there for a second before she shook her head and made her way inside where nathan was still asleep and awaiting her presence.
y/n had stayed away from mat for a while after that. she couldn’t see him after their interaction that had happened to go like that. she was married. she had a loving husband, a great job, and a great life. she wasn’t going to let some guy waltz into her life and ruin that.
she couldn’t let him get in the middle of y/n and nathan’s marriage. nathan was sweet and cared for her whenever he had the chance. although he had work trips, he always checked in on her. he loved her even if they were miles aways and she loved him back.
maybe that’s why y/n regretted the decision she made a couple weeks later. nathan was on a work trip and she was stressed. she had a ton of paperwork to be filled out by the next day and she couldn’t do it. so she marched on over to mat’s apartment and knocked.
biggest mistake of her life.
mat opened the door and saw her standing there. he smirked a little and leaned against the door a bit. “what brings you by?”
y/n didn’t answer. not verbally at least. instead she just leaned forward and grabbed mat by the back of his neck and brought him down towards her, putting her lips on his. mat was shocked for a second before he wrapped his hands around her back and brought her closer, their body’s practically glued together.
the kiss turned messy. y/n had opened her mouth to talk and it gave mat a chance to slip his tongue in. the two had fought for dominance over the kiss but mat had won.
he pulled them inside his apartment shutting the door behind them. they pulled away for a second to catch their breath, their lips kiss bitten and swollen, cheeks flustered. “y/n that was-”
“shut up.”
she grabbed his head and brought him back in for more. nathan was the least of her worries as she said her next words. “i need you to fuck me.”
mat pulled away after that. “what? y/n are you okay? is everything okay?” he pulled his hands away from her back and let them rest on her waist. “you’re married! you have a husband who loves you. we shouldn’t even be doing this!” he objected.
y/n shook her head. “he doesn’t need to know.” she leaned forward and began to pepper kisses in his neck along with suckling at it, making mat moan slightly. “a secret.” a kiss to his jawline. “let it.” a kiss to his neck. “be.” another kiss. “our.” kiss. “litte.” kiss to his apples bottom. “secret.” she whispered the last word against his lips as she placed a kiss to them.
he didn’t kiss back for a while as he thought about this situation. she was married and was over here kissing another man, in his apartment. but fuck, did she look hot. he began to move his lips at a faster pace then her making it hard for her to keep up. he began to walk backwards, the kiss never breaking apart.
he walked towards the couch and felt his knees hit the cushion, making him fall on it, y/n following suite. she pulled away and straddled his lap, a leg on either side of his own. the two returned back to their makeout session and y/n felt mat’s cold hands run over her stomach, under her tank top.
y/n pulled away and began to kiss all over his neck. he leaned his head to the side, allowing y/n to gain more access to his neck. she rested her hand on the other side of his neck as she began to suck on it slightly making mat let out a low groan as he ran his hands over her back all the way up and down. “fuck y/n.”
she felt her underwear get damp at the action. “you like that?” she breathed against his neck as she continued to suck and lap at his neck. he couldn’t help but nod as he brought his hands towards her boobs, feeling that she wasn’t wearing a bra. he couldn’t help but groan at the feeling, giving them a little squeeze. y/n moaned against his neck.
“take it off please.” she begged and pulled away from his neck. mat reached down and grabbed the hem of her shirt, pulling it upward as she lifted her arms, making it easier for mat to pull it all the way off. he threw it to the side. he looked at her chest and noticed her nipples had hardened from the slight breeze.
“shit, you’re beautiful.” he leaned forward and wrapped his lips around her boob, beginning to suck at them, licking the areola. y/n gasped and pulled at mat’s hair. he groaned against them and y/n couldn’t help but moan at the sensation and pleasure he was giving her.
after a couple of minutes of sucking and licking at her left boob, her moved onto the other, his hand coming up to squeeze and massage the one he had previously been sucking. y/n’s breathing was fast and her heart was beating quick. she was a moaning mess and tried to keep it down, careful to not wake up the other residents considering it was pretty late.
“take your shirt off.” y/n said and mat just looked up at her through his eyelashes as he sucked on her boob and y/n groaned at the sight. “please.”
mat pulled away with a slight ‘pop’ and began to massage both of her boobs. “you are perfect, i really hope you know that because if you don’t then i will keep saying it.” y/n laughed and just leaned down to kiss him as her hands ran down to the bottom of his shirt. she pulled away and stripped him free of it, throwing it behind the couch. he grabbed her face and began to kiss her, harshly.
mat moved her so she was laying down on the couch with him on top of her. his hands roamed all over he body, her boobs, stomach, legs, thighs, anywhere he could get his hands on.
he began to kiss down her body starting at her neck, spending a little time there in order to form dark purple bruises but soon remembered that her husband would see them and he didn’t want her to get caught so he just continued kissing down her body. from her neck to her boobs to her stomach and finally to her thighs.
the pajama shorts she was wearing were small, her ass hanging out a bit. mat began to pepper kisses all over before grabbing her shorts and pulling them down, along with her underwear, throwing them on the floor. she was bare before him. she had exposes herself completely to him and fuck, was she enjoying it.
mat began to kiss everywhere but where she wanted him. he moved upward and pressed a kiss to her lips. “if we do this, there’s no going back.”
y/n nodded. “i know. i know what i’m doing.”
mat’s eyes flickered between hers before leaning down and kissing her one last time before kissing his way down towards where she needed him the most.
y/n knew what she was doing was wrong. yet she couldn’t help it. y/n and mat had sex. even if she was married.
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the sun was up and the light came through the curtains that billowed softly thanks to the wind that came through the small space mat had left opened. mat laid in bed, his arm over y/n’s back, who was sleeping on her stomach. the two had moved to the bed some time last night.
y/n began to stir awake as she kept moving. she slowly opened her eyes and was met with the window and the sun rays that caused her to squint and close her eyes. she turned around and saw mat there, still asleep. she smiled softly as she saw his chest go up and down with eahc breath he took. he let out soft snores as he-
nathan.
y/n suddenly thought back to her love. her husband, the person she promised she would love for eternity and would never let go. yet she let him go in a way. he was to come back from his work trip the same day in a couple of hours and she sure as hell didn’t want him to find her here, in mat’s bed, naked.
she tried to unwrap mat’s arm fron around her yet his grip got stronger. he pulled her closer to him and just rested his head on top of hers, snoring softly.
“mat i need to go home.” she whispered to the man who snuggled closer. “mat i’m serious.” after getting no response she grabbed his arm and moved it with all the force she could muster.
mat whined, “noo. i was comfortable.” he opened his eyes and gave her a death stare. “come back.”
y/n shook her head and went into the living room where her clothes were before she put them back on and re-entered mat’s room. “i need to go home and you have a job to get to.”
“i don’t have to leave until later though and neither do you.” mat told the girl who stood with her arms crossed.
she walked towards the bed and began to crawl on top of him until they were face to face. “but i have a husband that is too be back very soon and will be waiting for me.” she whispered as she leaned down to place a slow kiss to his lips. “so why don’t you stay here and relax until you have to leave and i go home and wait for my husband to get home,” she pressed another kiss to his lips, “i’ll be back soon.”
mat stared at her for a while. “but soon won’t be soon enough. for all i know it will take you two weeks to come back to me,” he brought her closer. “i can’t wait that long.”
y/n laughed. “i promise you i’ll be back sooner then you think. patience, sweet boy.” she kissed him one last time and was about to pull away when mat pulled her in closer and deepened the kiss.
he sat upright and began to attack her neck with kisses and y/n let out a laugh but more of a moan. “m-mat i really have to go.”
“5 minutes. just stay another 5 minutes and then you can go.” he said as he began to reach under her shirt and squeeze her hips.
y/n pondered the idea, “5 minutes and that’s it mathew.” she let a breathy moan.
she felt mat smile against her neck, “i knew you wouldn’t be able to resist me.”
oh, y/n knew she was fucked.
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half the time i don’t even know what i’m writing, i js do it. also i will never be writing that detailed(ish) ever again. it is not for me. also mat barzal playing the electric guitar js does smth to me😫 the man he is i swear. (i should go to sleep since i have a morning class tmrw but i won’t so yayyy)
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brokenanxiety · 5 months
Note
imagine mathew fucking you after she came back from collage classes🤤
you hated night labs so fucking much but sucked it up because you wanted to graduate on time. class got out at 8 and you were home at 8:15 on the dot. perks of having a shared place with mat close to campus. he was inside on the couch waiting for you. he finished practice a couple hours ago and had time to make you two some dinner, which was waiting on the stove. "hi baby," mat says. you say nothing as you climb into his lap and squeeze him tight. "class was that bad tonight?" all you could mutter was a little "mhm." mat's hands made their way on your ass giving you a light smack. "baby, you know what might help? how about i treat you like a princess tonight and help you forget about your big girl problems? you would like that wouldn't you?" you could feel him get hard under you and all you could do was smile and nod. "you're such a good little girl and so responsive too. now why don't you start grinding that sweet little cunt on my thigh, yeah?" you do as your told and you could feel yourself get wetter by the second. you know you are about to leave a huge wet mark on his sweatpants but you were too blissed out to care. "awww look at my little baby, not a single big girl thought in that brain of yours. just looking to cum," mat cooed. and that's all it took for your to reach your first orgasm that night. once you come down from your hight, he takes this opportunity to flip you two over and to take off your pants and panties. he asks "what do you want princess? my cock or my fingers?" you could barely form a coherent response but he was able to make out 'please' and 'cock'. "anything you want princess," mat replies as he pushes his cock into your dripping cunt. "fuck baby, your cunt was made for me. it's perfect, just like you." you could only moan as a response. "you're doing so good for me. squeezing me just like that. im not gonna last much longer." mat knew you were close, and so was he. "mat im gonna cum," you choke out between moans. "me too princess, wanna cum in you," mat replies back. "yes mat please, fill me up. i wanna feel you inside me." a few more thrusts and you were cumming in his arms and he was not far behind. his cum painting your insides felt like heaven and you didn't want him to pull out not, not yet at least. you two lay on the couch for a few minutes before he pulls out to clean you up and so that you can go pee. after you two clean up and change you are both down in the kitchen eating over the stove. mat is hugging you from behind and feeding you the pasta he made for the both of you, enjoying the comfortable silence. when he says, "i love you know. you are smartest girl in the world and there is nothing you can't do. im going to the proudest boyfriend in the whole world during your graduation next year." you can help but smile and blush because you have the best boyfriend in the world, "shut up you sap, i love you too."
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barzysunflower · 7 months
Text
reconciliation — mat barzal
some barzy smut for you all :) wanted to wait posting this but those videos of him playing guitar just came out so we are all in desperate need for this rn!! as a reminder: video one two
word count: 2.9k
warning: SMUT (18+) & undisclosed fight (sorry I was too lazy to come up with a better backstory so just know it was fairly bad fight and this starts a couple hours afterwards)
You laid awake, desperately trying to fall asleep, but your fight with your boyfriend played in your head over and over again. It was so stupid and you hated that you were still mad, especially since he was leaving for a few days the next day. But you were too stubborn to be the bigger person and turn around and apologize.
Mat felt the same, though, the sleepless ness getting to him and turning around to face your back. He wrapped an arm around you and gently kissed your cheek. "Hey," he whispered, pulling himself closer to you until you were perfectly nestled to him. "We said we'd never go to sleep angry. I'm sorry. I love you."
You nodded, but didn't turn to face him. Your hand lifted to cradle his cheek and with an 'I love you, too' you both were finally able to fall asleep.
***
You spent the next few days alone, Mat being gone on a roadie. While you hadn't exactly talked about your fight, you mutually decided to just drop it since neither of you wanted to stay angry at each other. You face timed every day like normal, although there wasn't any spicy time that you would usually share. You saved that for after he hung up.
You could hear the music blasting from your apartment before you even stepped inside. Mat was back, since the early afternoon actually, but you were stuck at work. Yelling for him when you stepped foot inside the apartment wouldn't work, so after getting rid of you jacket and shoes you went to look for him. And what a sight when you did. He was dancing and singing along to the music, while attempting to chop an onion.
"Whatcha doin?" He jumped at your voice, dropping the knife and almost cutting himself.
"Don't scare me like that!" The shock on his face claimed after a second and he went to turn down the music and wash his hands before he pulled you in for a hug. "Missed you."
"Missed you." After a long kiss, you looked around to figure out what he was doing. "You're making dinner? For me?"
"Hey! I cook for you."
"Mhm."
"What? I do! You're just better than me that’s why I don’t do it so much." You patted his chest with a chuckle and kissed him again, shutting him up.
You helped him prepare the meal for a bit, before you went to go take a shower. Since seeing him today, especially in the kitchen, you had felt incredibly horny and devised a plan on how your night would go. But shower first.
After lotioning up and making you smell irresistible, you slipped into some sexy matching lingerie. You pulled on of his boxers overtop to be comfortable, but also show off your ass, and one of his white tshits that would show him exactly what was going on underneath.
You set the table when you came back and not long after you sat down for dinner. Throughout eating, you brushed your hair seductively and made some inappropriate noises, to get him riled up. And he did, but he could see exactly through what you were doing, so he didn't make a move. While he did want to flip this table to get to you, he just sat there staring at you, looking at wherever you wanted him to.
"This actually was pretty good," you said, taking a sip of you water. "I just hope desert is better."
His eyes darkened while you smirked at him. You were both staring at each other, fueling the heat in each of your bodies until you got enough.
"I must be getting my period or something, because I have been so horny these past few days," his body twitched, wanting to reach out to you. "Too bad you weren't there."
You got up to take both of your plates to the sink. "But don't worry, our pink friend helped me out a lot."
"What?!" You smiled at him from where you leaned against the kitchen island, showing off your legs. "And I didn't get a video or a call? Baby, come on." He was frustrated and tried to stand, but with a show of hand you got him to sit down again. You stalked over to him until you stood directly in front of him, looking down.
"I guess I was still mad at you," you said and slowly let you hands trace his cheek. Then you sat down on his lap where he immediately gripped your hips. Then you leaned down to whisper in his ear, "and I thought you should earn to see them."
"So... So, you did take a video?," he asked, his voice stammering.
"Maybe." You lips traced his jaw. "Maybe there's more than one." You let your hip roll, meeting his hard erection. "What are you going to do to earn the right to see them?"
He groaned as his head fell back. "Fuck, baby, anything. I'll do anything."
With that, you finally let him kiss you.
"Well? Show me what you got." And he did. You gave the control over to him and without hesitation he had you up and pressed down on the dining table. With a hard pull, your boxers and panties were off and he was staring down at you like a wild animal.
"God, you're so hot." His hands massaged your thighs before pulling your shirt up to expose your breasts contained in your black lace bra. He bent to to trace the outline of your tits with his lips. Swiftly, he ripped both cups down, exposing them all the way.
"Yes, suck them, Mat. Please ... please suck them," you begged, the sound so desperate that he complained immediately with a moan. He cupped your breast in his hand, squeezing it hard as he sucked your nipple between his lips. You moaned together and your hand got ahold of his head, pushing him into you. He played with both of your tits, sucking, nipping, licking, and squeezing, until you both got impatient and he got back down on his knees with a smirk. "Ready?"
His mouth descended onto your slick pussy, to which your pelvis shot up to meet his face. "Oh fuck." Hands still on your thighs, he took long, languid strokes with his tongue. You squirmed beneath him as he lapped away at you, never fully pushing all the way in against your clit, just staying around the outside, prepping you for what he had planned.
With two fingers, he spread you wide, exposing your clit, and then lowered his tongue to just above it.
And he hovered, letting you feel his heavy breath and the scruff of his jaw against your inner thigh.
"Mathew," you moaned. "Please."
With his hand that wasn't spreading her, he moved it back up your body, and just as he pinched your left nipple between your fingers, he press his tongue against your clit.
"Oh my . .. fuck." Your eyes squeezed shut, arching into him. He did it again. And again. And again. "More," you begged. "I need more."
In response, Mat pressed his tongue against your slit and lightly flicked at it, creating a vibration against the nub that caused you to grip his head and dig your fingers digging into his scalp. "Fuck, Maty. Oh my God . . . keep going."
His eyes lifted, to keep them on you to watch your reactions as he continued to pleasure you at a relentless pace. Your body grew tighter and tighter and your breath picked up as you got closer and closer to the edge.
His tongue attacked your clit more aggressively, pushing against it, sucking it. Your moans grew louder and your body tensed. Then your orgasm crashed over you, sending you into full body tremors. "Fuck... fuck." Mat sucked and licked you up until the tremors subsided and you laid there, limp, on the table.
Mat got back on his feet and bent over you to kiss you gently. His lips pressed small wet kisses along your neck and collarbone, until you had recovered enough to gain function over your limbs again. Your first act was to pull his shit off his chest, then you clung to him, wrapping both your legs and arms around him.
With his strong arms, Mat picked you up and set you in his lap when he plumped into your living room couch. "I love eating your sweet little pussy, feeling it clench around my tongue," he whispered into your ear as he pulled your hair. "But I love feeling it clench around my cock even more."
You moaned as your head fell into the crook of his neck. You were ready and desperate for him again and he knew immediately by the way you were rocking your hips, searching for his cock.
"You love that, too, eh? Feeling my dick pulsing deep inside you." You nodded quickly, hoping it would get him to do something faster. And he did, pulling his dick out of his sweatpants, pumping it a couple times in front of your eyes. Then he pulled on your hair, making you sit up straight while he leaned back. "Ride me. But don't let me inside you. I want to see just how slick that pussy is."
Your hungry eyes connected, but both of your heads soon fell back with moans as you slowly moved your wet cunt over his cock. "Oh my God, Maty, this feels... incredible."
"You feel incredible," he says in response as you fell forward, bringing your breast into him mouth. He focused on your nipple, swirling around it with his tongue, flicking and then nibbling just enough that you sucked in a sharp breath of air. With his hand, he did the same thing to your other breast as you continued to rock on him.
"I can come just like this," you say, your hands falling to his chest and your pelvis lifting just slightly to get a better angle. "Fuck, I'm already close."
"Then come. Use me, fuck me like this." His moans spurred you on, driving you closer to the edge. 
Your lips pressed together, as your eyes squeezed shut and your pace picked up. Your thrusts became more erratic until you reached your orgasm. "Fuck!" Your body shook and spasmed as you rode out your orgasm until there was nothing left to take. The you collapsed on top of him.
"That was so hot," he whispered, his voice raspy. "Now be a good girl and lie down." You obeyed, falling into to cushions exhausted. "Turn."
When you did, he gave your ass a hard slap, the echo of your skin filling the air. Then he moved a pillow under your pelvis and gave your ass another slap, before he moved his thumb over your arousal, swirling it around your entrance, and positioning his cock where he wants it.
With gritting teeth, he pushed his hips forward and with a hard thrust he pushed in his cock in your pussy until he bottomed out. You both moaned loudly and his grip got tighter on your hips as he tried to restrain himself. "More," you moaned as you started moving your hips.
"Babe, don't move. Please... fuck." You moved your pelvis anyway, and he matched the thrusts because he was as desperate as you. "I won't last."
"Do it, Mat. Fuck me as hard as you can." With a groan, the grip on your hips tightened again as he started pumping into you relentlessly. He had no control, all he was doing was fucking you chasing his release. Your pussy gripped his cock so tightly, spurring on both of your thrusts. He was pushing into you so hard, that the sound of your skin slapping was so loud, you thought the neighbors would be able to hear it.
"I'm right there. Fuck, I'm there," he groaned and moaned until he exploded inside you. Thick, warm ropes of his cum coated your insides. "Fuuuuck."
Out of nowhere, you started shaking as you reached your third orgasm. Your vision went black and your breath hitched while milking the last drops of his cum. Your body felt like jello as you came down from your high. Mat collapsed next to you, but you barely registered it. You were to exhausted to move or speak, so you laid there catching your breath.
Eventually, Mat's arm snuck around you and turned you to pull you into his chest. "Good enough to get that video?"
"Mhm," was all you answered and he smiled victorious, but little did he know he wasn't going to see it for a couple more weeks...
***
You had expected the call. After finally sending him the video of yourself playing with your pink vibrator, you had expected him to call you. For your own pleasure in the situation, like you hadn't had enough fun messing with him, you had sent the video at a time you knew he would see the notification but wouldn't be able to open it for another few hours. You reveled in the fact that he would be on the edge, dying to open that video, but couldn't because he was with his team in mandatory meetings.
You had expected the call. Which is why you were already ready and waiting in bed. What you didn't expect though, was to see Mat's fist wrapped around his cock moving up and down, instead of his face.
The camera flipped to show his face after a moment, revealing a very turned on Mat. "You little slut. You enjoyed that, didn't you? Torturing me even more by dangling that video in front of me?"
You smiled as you sank back into your pillows. "Yes."
"Turned you on, eh? Messing with me like that." He moved his phone so that you could see him from his thighs up and, god, nothing beat that view. "See what you do to me? Fuck, baby, that video was so hot. Screaming my name like that when I wasn't even there. All mine. You're mine." You were on edge and your hand itched to slide between your legs. "Did you have fun without me?"
"Wasn't that video proof enough?," you teased him again, but you knew it wasn't as good as it was without him.
"Tell me the truth or I'm hanging up."
You rubbed your hand over your panties and gave in. "Nothing feels right when you're not here." You need him and hear his voice to get off. "God, Maty, I'm so on edge right now. I need you." You positioned the camera so he, too, could see your body.
"Alright, I'll be nice. Strip. Take those fucking panties off and let me see your wet cunt." You did as instructed, even taking your bra off. "Now glide your fingers up and down your body and around your breasts without touching your nipples. Just like that, baby. Slower, I want you to feel how soft your skin is."
As your hand slid across your skin, you regretted teasing him for so long because you had a feeling he was going to do the same to you. "Slide your fingers closer to your pussy, tease yourself the way I'd tease you. Get close to your slit but don't touch yourself."
Your hand lowered and, when you got close enough, your pelvis lifted. "Don't fucking touch that cunt. It's mine."
"Don't make me wait," you groaned, throwing your head back in agony.
"Now who's talking."
"You liked it, I know it." You smirked, then dared to move your hand closer to your center.
"Shush. Spread your legs more and slowly spread those lips for me." You did, moaning at the sensation. "Fuck, look at you. I wish I was there, eating that wet pussy. Sucking on your clit, driving my dick so hard inside you that you can practically taste my cum in the back of your throat."
"Maty, I need more. Please," you begged as you breathing increased. You were so wet already and so close to your orgasm when you hadn't even really touched yourself yet. When you looked to your phone, you saw Mat started pumping his cock again.
"My dick is so hard, baby. Shit. Yes, go, finger yourself. I need to see you touch yourself."
Finally, you got two fingers to slowly circle your clit. "Oh, fuck," you yelled as head fell back again and your eyes rolled back in ecstasy.
"That's it, baby, keep up the pace. I need you to match my strokes. Pinch your nipple too. I want you to mark yourself."
Your hips lifted as your fingers sped up, chasing your release. And it was getting close. You looked to your phone, where Mat was still grunting while he worked himself. You saw a big bead of precum spill out of the tip of his cock, then he moaned loudly. "I'm there. Fuck, I'm gonna cum."
"Me too." You had no idea if he heard you, but your orgasm started crashing over you and you lost track of all of your senses for a moment. Your spams started slowly and then descended into full body shudders that left you screaming his name.
While you caught your breath, you turned to take your phone back into your hand. You saw Mat with a small smile looking at you, hand still around his cock, but his sticky cum spilled on his skin.
"You are an evil little woman," he said, which made you laugh. "But, god, what I wouldn't do for you."
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2-fast-2-curious · 1 year
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Christine.. do you have any audios for dom! vibe Matthew Barzal?? 🥺
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[M4F] Don't Tell Your Friends
[Gentle Mdom][Reassuring][Comforting][Virgin][Make Out][Instructing You][French Kissing][Whispering][Growling][Laughing][Teasing][Oral][Cum in my Mouth][25:29]
Creator Reddit: u/Qarnivore
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drewsbuzzcut · 2 months
Text
Standing On The Sun And I Don’t Feel A Thing
mat barzal x model!fem!reader
a visceral in doses fic
warnings: hospitals, miscarriages, mentions pain, nausea, and blood, mentions abortion, mentions panic attacks, grief, anger, some angst, and mat being kind of mean, also mentions trying for a baby and I think that’s all (pls let me know if I missed any)
this takes place september 2030
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“Where are the kids?” You ask, voice hoarse and eyes puffy.
“Shhh shhh. The kids are with Bev. Baby, what happened? I got a call from the hospital and I went straight to drop the kids off, thank god Beverly was home,” Mat takes a seat next to the side of the hospital bed. He brings your hand into his and you can tell he’s been crying.
“I-“ you start but stop as you start coughing.
“You need some water,” he presses the call button that alerts the nurse.
After a few sips of water, you close your eyes to try to gather your thoughts about all that you could remember.
“This morning, after I got to the photo shoot, I started feeling nauseous and my lower back was in a lot of pain. I just thought I was about to start my period. I don’t really remember anything after that. I think I remember seeing blood and then everyone started freaking out. Eventually everything went black,” you recall the foggy events that led you here.
“Do you know what happened? Did the doctor come to talk to you?” He asks but tries to hide his frantic state.
“I just woke up. I’m still in pain. I don’t know what’s going on. I’m scared, Maty,” you grip his hand really tight, bringing his palm up to your cheek for warmth and comfort.
“It’s going to be okay, baby. I love you. I’m here and you’re going to be okay,” he whispers against your forehead, willing his tears to go away.
A knock sounds on the door and Mat tells them that they can come in. The look on the doctor’s face makes you go pale.
“Is everything okay? Am I okay?” You ask warily.
“It’s nothing too serious, but I regret to inform you that you’re miscarrying at the moment,” the words fade out, your head fuzzy and heart pounding.
“I’m sorry what?” Mat says in shock.
You try to take deep breaths but everything feels shallow.
“Mrs. Barzal, you’re going through a miscarriage which is why you are experiencing severe pain and were bleeding earlier. We do, however, want to perform an ultrasound to confirm,” the doctor says in an eerie tone.
Tears spring to your eyes and you shake your head. This cannot be happening. The nausea returns and twists at your abdomen.
“That’s not possible,” you whisper.
“It’s what your blood test is telling us. We’re going to take you to a different room for your ultrasound,” the doctor says along with some other information before they leave the room.
“Oh my god,” you cover your face with your hands and throw your head back.
“I love you,” Mat kisses your forehead.
“This can’t be happening,” is the only thing you say.
An hour later it’s confirmed that your body is going through a miscarriage, and you feel like everything beneath your feet has been taken from you. You feel so empty and you didn’t even know you were pregnant.
You close your eyes and force yourself to fall asleep, but even then your mind still reels at the events of the day. Not even Mat’s hesitant touch can help you feel better.
“Y/n, wake up,” you hear Mat whisper softly in your ear a couple hours later.
You blink your eyes, the blinding light of the room making your head hurt.
“The doctor said that you will be discharged in about an hour,” he informs you, but you honestly just hear static.
Everything from that point on is a blur of unshed tears and horrific thoughts. The shrill sound of your babies wanting to be in your arms when you get home momentarily distracts you, but that emptiness lingers. You try to distract yourself with being a mom and setting up dates with your close friends. You move throughout the house, cleaning every surface over and over again to keep you sane. You go through about 4 wooden pencils as you write and write until you’re snapping each pencil in half with your strong grip. You take extra long showers to wash away each trace of grief that may be left on your body.
After a week of feeling like a robot, you start to feel every emotion you’ve been trying to push down come back up. It doesn’t help that Mat pulled himself away from you. You don’t remember the last time you had a full conversation that didn’t revolve around your kids or random topics that warranted a 30 second talk. You cancel all plans and lock yourself in the guest bedroom.
The empty feeling spreads from your stomach all over your entire body. How could you not know you were pregnant? Why wasn’t your body strong enough to keep them alive? Why did you feel so alone despite Mat being a father and a mother all while he’s trying to help you?
You sob your eyes out and twist in agony, because each time you feel like you might be okay, you’re reminded that your body failed you. No one prepares you for what it feels like to lose something you didn’t even know you could lose. You hate yourself for feeling this way, because it’s selfish when you already have kids and a husband. A family that’s already felt complete, but now it just feels broken.
It takes several phone calls to your therapist before you feel like you can function without your heart aching every second. You realized that you need your babies’ hugs and kisses. You needed to feel some kind of love.
You attempt to put back all of your broken pieces by playing with your children or napping with them. Simply just being around them puts a smile on your face. You start to feel yourself come around more. You start hanging out with friends again and laughing and feeling anything but sadness. You try to be more positive in situations you’d automatically become upset with.
The only thing that’s keeping you down is Mat. He’s become really good at being just a roommate. He’ll work with you when it comes to the kids, but other than that the space between you both feels like miles rather than inches. You’ve let him keep to himself, because you’re not sure how he’s coping with what happened- especially because you’ve locked yourself away for the past week or so.
Eventually you get tired of his silence and pressure him into talking to you.
“What’s going on?” You ask one night when he’s just getting out of the shower.
“What are you talking about?”
You stay silent for a minute and just watch him. His face conveys nonchalance, but his body is rigid.
“You know what I’m talking about, babe. Why have you been so distant with me? Is it because I’ve been sad? I’m better now and even if I wasn’t, you can still talk to me,” you say, walking up to him and putting a hand on his shoulder.
His body stiffens and he slowly moves away from your touch.
That really hurts.
“It’s not about that, Y/n. Believe it or not, I’m not feeling this way because you were or are sad,” he blurts out.
He continues to move around the room, getting dressed and putting on lotion.
“Okay. So what’s wrong? Why are you being pissy with me?”
“Like you don’t know,” he says.
“Obviously I don’t. Why do you think I’m asking?” He’s really starting to make you mad.
“How could you not tell me?” He finally asks.
“Not tell you what? I’m so confused right now,” you tug on your hair and shut your eyes, trying to come up with the missing details.
“How could you not tell me that you were pregnant? I had to find out by seeing you in the hospital because you were having a miscarriage,” he just about shouts and it makes you flinch.
“I didn’t even know I was pregnant. I was just as in the dark as you were. I would’ve told you if I was pregnant. I can’t believe you’d think that I’d keep something like that from you,” you explain with your voice and head low.
“Shit. I- I’m sorry. I just assumed that you knew and I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry. I love you,” he gathers you in his arms and just holds you.
“I’m sorry I pushed everyone away. I just needed some time to think about things and to be sad,” you say through tears.
“It’s okay. I love you,” he kisses your temple.
“I love you.”
Later that night you’re both in bed, cuddling and basking in the comfortable silence.
“Mat?”
“Yeah, baby?”
“I think you should get snipped,” you voice your most recent thought.
“What?” He questions because he’s not sure if he’s hearing things.
“I really think you should get a vasectomy,” you reiterate.
“Wait… why?”
You adjust in his grip so you can fully face him. Your hand goes to rest on his cheek and you thumb at his skin.
“I think I’m done with having babies. We have 3 and I think that’s enough,” you say.
“No. That’s not what I meant. I mean why do I have to be the one to get the procedure done?”
“Well why not?” You ask back.
“I can’t get that because I have to be sharp for hockey. I can’t spend weeks just lazing around during a recovery period, you know that. You should get your tubes tied,” he explains and you let out a scoff.
You move away from him and get off the bed in favor of pacing around the room.
“I’ve held each of our babies inside of me for 9 months. I breastfed all of them. I just had a miscarriage for a baby I didn’t even know existed. My body is constantly changing. That’s not always an ideal situation for my career, especially because my body is an important aspect of my job. Hell, I’m practically art! So, no, I’m not going to be the one to get my tubes tied,” you rant, eyes squinted and a frown wrinkling your forehead.
“I thought that’s why you started taking classes at Pratt, so modeling wouldn’t be the only thing you have going for you?” He replies, subtly putting words in your mouth.
Your every feature turns down in a sad and disappointed pout. You honestly didn’t see this conversation going in this direction. The whiplash is unreal.
“That’s not what I was aiming for when I decided to take some classes. You’re being a real ass right now,” you bite.
“I’m being an ass? What about you? You just assumed that I don’t want any more kids. You know, I want you to at least want one of them, because if you haven’t noticed you really didn’t want either of them,” he spits out, face red as a tomato.
That makes you cry. That assumption that you never wanted your kids makes you die on the inside.
“At first, you wanted to get an abortion with Nolan,” he says when you stay silent.
You cross your arms over your chest and cock up an eyebrow, daring him to continue.
“You didn’t really want Angel. I remember you saying that you didn’t want any more kids after Nolan,” he adds.
You glare at him in return.
“Lastly, you said you didn’t really like the timing of Sloane and I can’t blame you, because you went and broke up with me and then hid it from me. No wonder I thought you hid this one, too,” Mat rips into you, voice laced with venom.
“You listen to me, Mathew Barzal, if I really didn’t want to have our kids, I wouldn’t have had them. Believe me when I say that. Of course I wanted our kids. Was I scared out of my mind each pregnancy? Yes! Would I take them back? Hell no. I love our babies, so for you to say that really sucks,” you respond, wiping away your tears.
He just shakes his head in return.
“I’m scared of pregnancy. I just lost a baby and you expect me to want to try for another one? I don’t know if I can do that for you, for us,” you correct your last couple of words before he can turn them into something else.
He watches you, staying silent as you fall apart at his feet.
“Is this going to be the end of us?” You ask.
“Why is it always a breakup with you? Is that what you really want? Deep down, do you really not want to be with me?” He accuses.
“No! I just feel like you don’t love me, so I’m not going to beg you to stay if that’s not what you want. I can’t even give you a baby, so there’s that,” you admit.
“I lost the baby, too,” Mat points out.
“I know that, Mathew. I know, but you don’t understand what it’s like as a mother to go through a loss like that. My body should be capable of growing a life. Then you go and say that I didn’t even want my kids. You don’t know what it feels like to feel so utterly empty and alone. It doesn’t matter that I didn’t know that they existed, because as a mother, I should’ve known,” you whisper as your voice starts to become strained.
You feel your chest start to cave in on you and the lack of support makes your knees buckle. You go straight to the floor, tucking your knees into your chest for some kind of stability. You’ve never seen Mat so upset. You’ve never been on the receiving end of it. Part of you is mad at him for the way he’s talking to you, but another part of you understands. This whole miscarriage has turned your world upside down. You’d be naive to think that it wouldn’t affect him too.
“Baby, don’t cry. It wasn’t your fault. I love you, always. I promise it’s going to be okay,” he wraps you in his arms and squeezes you to his chest. He beats himself up for the way his words caused you to crumble. Seeing you break after already being broken down snaps him out of his anger. His word vomit just spewed out, but maybe it was a good thing because everything was out on the table.
You don’t blame him, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.
He doesn’t know it, but the beat of his heart does wonders to calm you down before you can have a panic attack.
“Do you hate me?” You lock your hands behind his neck, desperate to have him pressed to you in any way possible.
“Never. I’m sorry I made you feel like I did. I swear I would never hate you,” he rubs your back.
“You said I didn’t want our babies,” you get out through the remnants of your cries.
“Do you really feel that way? Be honest,” you speak again.
“Part of me used to feel that way, but every time I see you with our babies, I see how much you love them. You’re the best mama bear to our little loves. I wouldn’t have had kids with you, if I felt certain that you didn’t want them. I was just being an asshole,” he whispers into your temple.
You sniffle at his response, feeling another bout of tears ready to fall because you never knew he felt that way.
“Are you sad about the miscarriage?” You need his feelings to be transparent.
“Yeah. A lot more than I thought I would be. I’m also angry, because you shouldn’t have had to go through that. I should’ve known you were pregnant, maybe things would be different,” he answers honestly.
“It’s not your fault either. This is just a really sucky thing,” you try to comfort him, but you can see the tears in his eyes and the way his bottom lip wobbles.
“I’m sorry for being mean. I can’t take it back, but just know that I love you so much,” he finally cries.
You pull him closer, hand caressing his neck and back and you kiss his cheeks.
“We’ll work through it. We always do. Do you really want another baby?” You look into his eyes.
“I do. One more baby barzal, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to because I made you feel bad about an insecurity I have,” he admits, thumb wiping away your tears. His forehead leans against yours and for the first time in a couple of weeks, you feel whole.
“Insecurity?” It’s the first you’re ever hearing about it and it shocks you to your core. For as long as you’ve known Mat he’s always been the secure and stable one.
“I sometimes thought you were just having kids to please me and not because you were ready to have them. I guess I was feeling insecure about our age gap. I finally got somewhat of an understanding of what you used to feel like,” he explains and you feel guilty for never realizing.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me? I could’ve soothed your worries a long time ago. Like I said, I had our babies because I wanted to.”
“I thought I could get away with it, but I guess it just bubbled up until I couldn't hold it in anymore. I promise to come to you whenever I get an insecurity, or just any little problem really. You’re my wife, I need you all the time,” he pulls you in for a kiss. You try to kiss every single one of his worries away.
“I would like to purposely try to make a baby, but I don’t know when I’ll be ready. Just have some patience with me,” you say into his mouth.
He shakes his head.
“I don’t want to pressure you into having another baby if that’s not something you want to do.”
“Mat, baby, you’re not pressuring me into anything. I’ve been having some baby fever lately. Miss Sloane is getting older, so it’d be nice to have another baby,” you assure him.
“Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready,” he says, pulling you into a kiss.
“I love you. We’re going to get through this,” you promise him. And you will,, no doubt about it.
Being riddled with grief and guilt- that can only come from the way you both acted towards each other- will make you both stronger in the end. Stronger as individuals, as a couple, and as parents. You’re just glad you’re going through it all with your husband by your side. It’s Mathew or no one, and it’s safe to say that he feels the same way.
a/n: Looks like mat and model!reader have some therapy and lots of talking to do before they fix everything. As always, hope y’all enjoy!
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adorethedistance · 1 year
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Black and White - Mat Barzal x Reader
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Hockey Masterlist
Warnings: Swearing, mentions anxiety, almost pg13
Words: 1385
Summary: After attending one of the isles’ many fundraising events, a simple walk in the park turns into a moment the two of you will never forget.
A/n: I’m like 90% done with finals and so I’m filling this anonymous request  as a result. I hope y’all like this quick little fic and as an update there’s a fluffy Zegras fic in the works. 
“Thank you for coming with me tonight,” Mat says from behind a fleeting scoop of bubblegum ice cream. The Islanders fundraising gala was fun and all but Mat and I dipped out before closing remarks in favor of grabbing ice cream before Baskin Robbins closed. So now we’re walking around a random park, black tie attire, in the cold Long Island night.
“You don’t have to thank me, I’m your girlfriend. Being your plus one is part of the gig, and I’m more than happy to do it.” Mat lets go of my hand to lift his arm and gesture me over. I gladly accept the warmth as I’m nearly freezing from walking around at night in a light coat while eating ice cream. He hugs me into his side and kisses my cheek gently. I breathe a small laugh as his lips are still cold.
“How do you know if you want to marry someone?” Mat asks out of nowhere. I hesitate for a second, jarred by his candidness.
“Are you asking me specifically or like the general ‘you’?”
“I’m asking you specifically.” I pause to collect my thoughts and Mat watches me carefully.
“...Well…I think for me specifically…I want an equal relationship where I feel like I lean on them as much as they lean on me for support. I want someone who respects my boundaries and knows I’m their partner and not their therapist. Whoever it is will get along with my family and at the very least tolerate my friends,” we share a small laugh amidst the tense moment. “I want someone who understands how I give love and helps me understand how to give them love and- why are you looking at me like that?” Mat barks out a nervous laugh. He takes his arm off of my shoulders and messes with his hair a bit. One of his nervous habits that I’m not sure he realizes he has.
“Do you think… I meet those requirements?” I hesitate but only because I’m trying to remember everything that I said.
“Yes, I think you do.” Mat smiles relieved before taking my hand in his own once more, placing a kiss on the top of it. We continue through the park, heading back to the car when a sudden flash of light catches our attention. Looking to the source, we see that a gazebo covered in christmas lights had previously not been lit. I snap my head around to look at Mat and the look on his face tells me he already knows just how excited I am about it.
“I don’t know how I didn’t notice this before!” I say as I’m pulling Mat along with me. His pace was too casual for the kind of urgency this sight has instilled in me. As we get closer, someone stands up and I stop in my place. I don’t want to impose on someone else’s time with the pretty lights. Opening my mouth to speak, I immediately cut myself off when I recognize the not so unfamiliar stranger.
“Beau?” I ask when he turns around. He looks at me, slightly panicked. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh my god, no way!” I hear a woman’s voice from behind me and Mat. I turn around to see it’s Emma emerging from a weird angle. She’s coming at us from behind rather than from the parking lot or from the shops.
“Long time no see,” I joke, happy to see our friends despite just spending the last three hours with them. “What’s up? Are you guys also on a walk… at the same park?” Beau and Emma share a look before she gestures him over to where she’s standing.
“Yeah, I was telling him about this gazebo because I drove by one night and the lights were just so pretty I wanted to show him.”
“Gotcha. Well if you want, I can take some cute pictures of the two of you!” I offer happily and Emma and Beau share another look.
“That… would be great, thank you! Beau?” She looks at him and nods over to the gazebo. He looks at Mat with the most confused look I’ve ever seen.
“You okay?” I ask as Emma hands me her phone. She has to physically walk over and grab Beau which snaps him back into reality.
“Yeah I’m good,” he replies quietly and walks into the gazebo. Emma barely poses and I’m about to snap the third photo when she breaks away and walks over to get her phone from me.
“That should be good, thank you.”
“Are you sure? I only took like three-”
“Yeah, no, we’re good! Your turn!” She says urgently and nudges me toward the gazebo. I decide not to push back and when I turn to beckon Mat over, he doesn’t follow.
“I’ll hold your coat so you can get outfit pictures first.” I reluctantly nod and then shrug off my jacket. Why is everyone being so weird?
“You gotta hurry because I am FREEZING!” I instruct Emma and she laughs before nodding.
“Copy that.”
“Okay, I want full fit and shoes for some and then just waist up in the others,” I speak quickly before posing and trying not to shiver violently. “Fuuuuuucckk it’s so cold.” All three of them laugh at my dramatics. Mat shakes his head amusedly and then hands my coat to Beau so he can get in the pictures. He wraps an arm around my waist for a few pictures and Emma snaps approximately two before putting on her director hat.
“Okay, Y/n stay where you are. Mat can I have you stand to the side of her but take a tiny little step back?”
“How should I pose without him…?” I ask skeptically. I don’t think I can see the creative vision and I hope Mat is also a little lost so I don’t just look like an idiot. When I turn to see if he’s also puzzled, I don’t get the moment I’m hoping for. Rather than sharing a confused look and laughing about it, I find him placed just out of my line of sight on one knee with one hand tucked into his jacket pocket.
My eyes go wide for a millisecond before welling up so full of tears that I can no longer see. I hold my right hand over my mouth to keep myself from crying harder. Mat has small tears in his eyes as he holds a small velvet box the color of the Isles signature blue.
“Y/n… you are the love of my life. I remember the first time you came over to my apartment. It was date number four. I made us dinner and you went to the bathroom and when you came back you were very anxious.” I laugh through my tears as I recall the evening and how the story went.
“You were acting weird the entire night and when I asked what was wrong, you were silent for a minute before asking if I “actually” used 3-in-1 shampoo. I laughed so hard I nearly cried and from that moment on, I knew you were endgame.” His simple word choice makes me laugh and the swelling of emotions in my chest makes me forget just how cold I was before.
“Y/n Y/l/n, will you marry me?” I begin to sob so uncontrollably that I can’t speak so I just nod an emphatic yes. Mat smiles brightly before taking the ring out of the box and sliding it onto it’s permanent spot on my left hand.
I don’t even wait for him to stand up before grabbing his face and kissing him with the passion only two people madly in love could ever know. He kisses me back and places his hands on my waist. Emma and Beau cheer and I remember they’ve been here the whole time.
“You motherfuckers! You knew, didn’t you?” They laugh at my outburst and confirm my suspicion. Mat rises to his full height and when he’s standing I playfully shove his chest. “That’s why you were being so weird today!”
“How does it feel to be engaged, man?” Beau asks and Mat huffs a long sigh.
“I don’t know, I think I blacked out.”
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