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#marisha's face journey was just too good
otterlyart · 2 years
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Jealousy is a purple-haired sorcerer
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darkdisrepair · 1 year
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cr meta: laudna, imogen, and rebirth
hello hello here are today's friday topics: SPOILERS OF COURSE
imogen's ritual contribution | laudna and growth | changed group dynamics | our father who art in heaven, [redacted] | and probably some miscellaneous things too
imogen's ritual contribution
first of all i will say that sam's idea to compel laudna back was smart mechanically, if it had worked, but horrible (not a horrible from him, but from fcg) to take away the agency they had just worked so hard to gain for laudna.
i'm glad imogen called him out on that, and gave laudna every choice she could have. i'm glad she didn't try and force her to come back (which, as debated by many critters) could have been very real as well. and very in character.
but no. she leads with this beautiful perspective of love, and purpose gained, and without saying it that is so much worth living for.
but with her low roll- i'm almost positive that laudna would not have heard her. yes, she heard them in the dreamscape. she remembers that. but i don't think she heard everything imogen said in the ritual, and that's so so so sad, though the sentiments of "i'll be there for you" rung so true throughout their time in whitestone.
imogen's "you know you saved my life," more than her "i love you," was heartbreaking and has stuck with me for so long.
it says more than i love you- it says in so many ways i love you and more, it says the same as percy's plea to pelor- "she is my heart and my judgement and the future i have chosen" because what is more romantic than being the person who helped someone find reasons worth living for?
but also- it's a glimpse into the huge breadth of sadness imogen carries with her, and continues to carry- the solitude. and i think we have a lot to explore with her mental health moving forward.
also, god bless critical role for letting marisha and laura hug each other and hold each other i just ;-; i was sad when they switched back but the CONTENT WE GOT when it was happening was perfection. a beautiful layer to the story.
laudna and growth
back when laudna said "the worst thing that could happen to me has already happened" it felt like she had processed a lot of her trauma- but seeing the episode today, i think this was her chance to make that sentence really ring true.
watching her walk through whitestone, and repaint those memories, holding the hands of her friends, feeling their support as she faced where she died- all it was beautifully done by matt and marisha and such a beautiful tribute to sharing trauma, but not letting it bury you- to let that growth take you further.
seeing her connect with whitestone, with the sun tree- it's a step in the right direction.
there are a lot of conversations that should be had. i wish the group had talked more, and dealt with shopping and catching the de rolos up less, but that means that there will be plenty to pick apart later.
but i can name so many conversations that will be heartbreaking later: laudna/fearne, laudna/ashton, laudna/orym especially. seeing fearne and ashton's quiet, almost timid love for laudna was a great touch as well.
it's interesting that as it stands, laudna's backstory, if it had a progress bar, is probably the closest completion. she's on the path to processing her trauma, and delilah lacks a connection she once had (whether she's still around is a great debate). i can see the last checkpoint be sealing delilah away for good, or restoring laudna's body to how it was before she died originally.
but that being said- she is also undeniably tied to imogen's journey. i can see her becoming a mentor, of sorts. they've been to laudna's home, and imogen was there every step of the way. when they travel to the taloned highlands, and imogen has to face her father, and the plains where she stands in her dreams, i know laudna will be there.
changed group dynamics (i lied it's mainly about imogen and laudna lmao i'm nothing if not an imodna stan first)
as a little aside to laudna's return- the group feels so complete and yet so different. especially laudna and imogen's relationship.
in many ways, they've switched places. laudna is the one outwardly showing her hurt- struggling to process trauma right in front of her eyes, needing support from her friends, reticent and unsure of herself.
and it's imogen, who provides the comfort. imogen, who advocates for laudna in the castle where she died, imogen, who holds her hand, imogen, who checks up on her.
imogen, who hides her pain from laudna.
because she doesn't tell everyone about the dream, at first. she hides her terror, of seeing eshteross in her dreams, because there is so much to do and people to contact and she can't let herself cry, because how could she put all of her sadness on laudna, when they're still in whitestone, when she was only dead a day ago?
she leans on fcg, this time, with her dreams, and it's strange, and laudna sees this and she's quiet. because she sees how imogen has grown. she can see that the group did things and grew ties to each other when she was gone, and it makes her wonder- what place does she have in the group, now?
finally:
our father, who art in heaven- lord eshteross
i love our orc grandpa and ill miss him so terribly. what a way to close out a halloween episode- i was terrified.
kudos to him for putting up a good fight, and for being so generous, and compassionate, and i hope he rests peacefully.
cr needs to post the cookie recipe though.
but more than that- otohan is becoming so SPOOKY, with her assassinations. she's so terrifying. so powerful, and deadly, with the toxin, and it's terrifying not knowing when she'll appear again.
because she's such a source of group pain. i don't think she's the BIG bad, because i think they'll be playing around with gods at some point, but damn she's putting up a good fight for that title.
overall, my favorite parts- imogen and laudna reunion, laura and marisha reunion, our milf lady vex'ahlia.
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nochiquinn · 2 years
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campaign 3 episode 25: fresh cut grand theft auto
mala: happy pride month...?
"sorry max"
ANIMATE?
okay that's sick as fuck
"fire" jglkdfjgkldf
I somehow forgot about taste of tal'dorei
I JUST noticed what sam is wearing
matt is going a face journey with everything erika says about this place
robits
I have missed the last ten minutes bc I was getting a screenshot of the last time sam wore that
Who Just Burped
"sephora-like blast"
oh look my secondhand embarrassment says it's time to go make food
also 90% of this is absolutely wasted on me bc I've never been to Medival Times and I don't drink
like I appreciate a good lore drop but the spa in EXU Kymal hit more for me
"lore! lore! lore!"
okay I'm paying attention now
birdie and ollie
apparently this episode is ~5 hours long but after the last episode of calamity it's a baby
"does she feel real?" "yeah, sure"
"it says fuck"
shoutout to me after I gave birth angrily stating the year and who the president was to prove I was cognizant despite my 103F fever to get them to listen to me
(it didn't work)
the disappointment
"and drink heavily"
travis
chetney
[kanmi voice] fuck you, you're not a royal
"and he's also here"
oh she's trying to butter imogen up, 100% forgot they're in a fight
"you do not have a flesh tongue and I do not cross my eyes"
oh shit oh shit
Meet At Joe's
"I know you're going to anyway, but try not to look like tourists"
"why not"
fearne
FEARNE?
fearne has a vex commemorative plate lksdjflsa
"would you like anything in return?" ashley
"comic sans is an odd choice"
laura's gonna kill sam in the parking lot
delilah go bllleahhhh
I can't believe dwayne johnson would do this to imogen
right after I typed this someone made the exact same joke in discord skdfjsl
"a heartbeat or something" fcg
fcg are we projecting
laudna :(
someone hug the dead lady
tot holder
everybody trying to get imogen and laudna back together
twitch I'll kill you
"that lady's got a lot of love in her"
"I SAW THIS. POTHOLDER. AND THOUGHT OF YOU."
"whitestone is for lovers" skdlfjslk
JOSTENS IS NEVER DOWN
("quinn nobody's gonna get that" that one was for high-school me)
HE PAWNED THE RING
fdlskj dorks
sergeant slaughter
SLEEPY OMAR that's all I need
gonna beat up fcg until he admits he's a person
I have straight-up zoned out for 20 minutes
"furiosa style" caleb style
"I'll figure it out" she will not, she will pop out of polymorph and lie badly
chetney calling fearne princess is giving me grunthor calling rhapsody duchess and if you get that reference I'm so sorry
Big Fearne Energy
YEET CHILD
Mike Hunt
matthew say the names out loud BEFORE the game
the spirit of purvon
I just realized this is literally just chorizo from far cry 6
"he's got LITTLE WHEELS"
erika ishii, known chaos goblin
taliesin jaffe, known erika ishii enabler
I didn't think he was actually gonna go in but he did
"let her step on me" marisha no
A Rock-Based Apology
....pebble and the penguin
"I've definitely learned my lesson" immediate hysterical laughter
"I really wanna steal a crawler machine"
ashton is proud of you, better reload
grand theft fcg
travis is a combination of "WEREWOLVES GDI" and "STRATEGERY GDI"
laura ur vex is showing
liam hears it too
wait what happened I zoned out again
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wizardnuke · 2 years
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rewatching c2 from the beginning. I missed molly soooo much also I love seeing the early dynamics as a whole it's so fun. they're all so mean and suspicious. except for jester ofc
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realtalk127 · 2 years
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You know what has me absolutely losing my mind after CR 3x17?
Orym says to Laudna: “After everything you’ve been through, you’re the happiest one in this bunch.”
To which Laudna says: “Of course. The worst thing that’s happened to me has has already happened.”
Which – just at face value – is such a devastating line. (Like, holy hell, Marisha. How long have you been sitting on that one?) BUT ALSO… what Laudna doesn’t know (and neither does the audience at this point) is that Orym is probably sitting there internally going, “Yeah. Me too.”
What’s remarkable to him is not just that Laudna is so happy despite it all, it’s that Orym himself isn’t. How can Laudna be happy when he still feels the melancholy of his own loss every single day?
And THEN - as if that wasn’t heart-wrenching enough - when Orym tries to prod Laudna, looking for any sadness to be found (even grieving on her behalf and apologizing for her loss), Laudna says, “It was a long time ago.” And Orym responds with, “Respectfully, so fucking what?”
Orym’s own journey with grief and loss is so loud, it comes across loud and clear even before we get his backstory drop. Sure, it hasn’t been as long since he lost Will as it’s been since Laudna lost her own life, but everything in him is screaming, It’s not fair! I’ll never get over this. No amount of time would be enough.
And Laudna’s final comment: “Not worth being sad, about what can’t be changed.” and Orym’s response: “I know that to be true.”
To be fair, Laudna has had a lot more time to process the trauma in question - not to mention there have been indications that Laudna maybe isn’t handling this as healthily as she likes to project - but I just love these two characters watching each other deal with very different losses in different ways. It’s just *clenches fist* so fucking good.
Marisha and Liam playing characters who are two sides of the same coin, my beloved.
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cadaceus · 3 years
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C2E134
The dungeon crawl continues but this time with some serious lore (no, not just Nord lore, though we’re knee deep in that too.) We got to see so many different parts of Aeor (and met a new buddy!) and I feel as though things are this close to being put together... I’m so excited to see what’s next! But until then here are my liveblogs for Campaign 2, Episode 134 of Critical Role! Spoilers below, so beware.
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- Travis is the Chosen One in every universe... first Yeehaw Game Ranch verse, and now the Nordverse fghjkg
- Oof, are we going to have the angsty talk about Fjord’s decision with the rangers this early on or...?
- DAGEN’S OKAY THANK GOD
- I have no idea where we are because I was too busy arguing with my friend about whether or not Shaggy from Mystery Inc has a secret weed business (he doesn’t) but all I know is that there is SOMETHING within a structure and that scares me
- Matt’s creepy laugh into decomposed body was way too realistic, Mr. Mercer I have some concerns
- CADUCEUS AND YASHA TAKING IMPROV TOGETHER IS SUCH A FUNNY IMAGE
- “Mausoleum of the Forgotten”..... oof 
- Fresh blood.... so did Lucien and Cree come through here, or is this like left over from something else somehow?
- Liam’s facial journey throughout this throuple conversation is so funny
- "DON’T WE NEED TO BE STOPPING THE END OF THE WORLD??” fjord sghjgkdhls
- To beseech Brasharr to protect us... what does this mean
- “Look around you” is such a poignant and spooky way to end that conversation (but also: LORE TIME LORE TIME)
- Essek has never rolled well once in his life and I respect him for that
- MY INTERNET CUTTING OUT DURING AN ESSEK SCENE IS A PERSONAL AFFRONT
- AEORMATON???
- “I will die for this creature” me tooooooo Sam
- Genesis Ward?? This is so much lore omg
- “This is Essek” “I don’t trust it” Stop I love himmm
- “Be careful of trusting anything at face value” “I haven’t done that in a long while” okay I got emo quick  😭
- I love how Sam/Veth always checks for the NPCs pronouns, it’s so sweet
- Every time Beauyasha kiss I gain three years to my life, I’m so used to surviving on mere crumbs and now we get so many lovely moments every week.... this is the true Hero’s Feast!
- “[Ashley], you’re just the cutest” big mood Marisha 🥺
- ruh roh Caleb is getting truly messed up right now is the wizard still alive??
- SHADOWGAST GRAVITY SINKHOLES IN BATTLE.... WHAT IS SEXIER THAN WIZARDS...
- why dex save??
- “DARKNESS POURING DOWN HIS FACE???” Matthew Mercer what to HECK does this mean.....
- HAIR??
- Ooh, so it must be if they roll a 17 or higher for that Aeor f*ckery?
“Caleb, are you alright?” yes I will be taking these Shadowgast crumbs once again, please don’t judge me at this time of vulnerability djhfjkf
- YES NATURAL 20 JESTER!!! AND THE HDYWTDT THAT’S RIGHT
- bald fjord hjghsjklsflj that’s better than i thought it would be at least!
- Oh phew, Lucien and Cree are resting too, that’s some relief at least since I thought they might just forge on ahead
- WAIT WHAT DID HE SEE AS A GIANT APE? LIAM OBERON THATS SO OMINOUS.... It must have something to do with Artagan right? And/or Artagan’s interactions with Jester? Is he losing his powers or something? Why would Caleb specifically get a Perception check and no one else though?
- Another Beau and Caleb dream woof here we go
- “I’m here to take my reign, long may it be” THIS MOTHER FDJHGDKFDJGF THAT TOOK ME OUT IN ONE HIT NO ONE SPEAK TO ME I’M KFJKDBMFNMDS.,
- Okay so that wasn’t as emotionally charged as last week thank goodness, but I have a feeling we’re going to continue building up to something extremely harrowing. But until then I love you all, and is it Thursday yet?
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bimney424 · 3 years
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“But Beau's body is a weapon.”
“Yeah. Damn straight.”
 Episode 124 started out pretty tumultuous with them being chased by Lucien & the TombTakers. So close in fact that magic missed them on a few occasions but does manage to hit Jester who is an owl & pulls her back 10 feet. That to me is just a little too close for comfort. I won’t lie, was a little nervous that the TT would actually catch up to them & finish the fight. Glad that they used some evasive tactics to gain some ground & give them a little time to figure things out & get the stone teleported to wherever it went cause it missed Yudala by a bit I think. Them getting to Essek was a good move for them as well. Even though I have some reservations about the whole teleporting in & out of Eiselcross, they really have no choice but to leave & come back. Regardless of what risks they may face in the journey, stopping the TT from completing their mission is more important. It is interesting that Essek is in the position that he is. Instead of having him jailed or even executed, they send him to a desolate ice hell even though he is technically a spy who committed war crimes. Why send a good person when you can send a criminal? He will prove to be a valuable asset in the fight against Lucien, but still not a trustworthy individual. Depending on who the gang gets to help them, it will be a very interesting next few episodes.
The main thought that is on almost everyone’s mind though is with the prospect of some down time in Nicodranas, will Beau & Yasha take advantage & go on their long awaited date? It would be nice for these two to have some alone time together. If that be a date or a conversation somewhere uninterrupted, that would be amazing. And since it is the same week of Valentine’s Day, that would make it even better. I am not expecting anything outside of those two things because getting one’s hopes up & then having them dashed is horrible. I do see them getting some alone time since Veth will be able to see Yezza & Luc. Jester can go see her mom & drag Fjord with her since she does have news & a need to explain her longer horns. Cad did say he would check with the Wildmother everyday until he found out if the TT found another crest. Caleb can try to discover some new spells. With everyone out doing their own thing, why wouldn’t our favorite little lezs have some much-desired alone time? No pressure on Marisha & Ashley to roleplay the fuck out of this time in Nicodranas though. Only 2 days left to see!!
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beetlemancy · 4 years
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what about top 5 Marisha RP moments
1. Keyleth vs The Illusionist    You might think this is an odd choice for number one. It’s not so much that its my favorite RP moment, so much as it just embodies everything I love about Marisha’s RP. You could argue that her and Liam are the most In Character 100% of the time, even during ‘joke’ scenes. This is sort of an example of this. Marisha got a lot of shit, like more than she usually does, over this because a lot of people thought it was super out of character or that she was playing Keyleth way too ‘dumb.’ But it was actually perfect. They had been through such hell recently! She had legitimate PTSD she was working through, and at this point Kiki didn’t have as much worldly experience at all. Yes, it was played sort of in amusement overall, but Marisha played this straight as Keyleth and allowed everyone else to impart the scene with comedy. She does this a lot too - she trusts her friends to do what they do best, and so she does what she does best - she fucking believes it and sells it.
2. The Letter     Although this scene didn’t have too much actual RP from Marisha herself, you can see how deeply she is in it. How deeply she felt for Keyleth and for her journey and for the deep friendships she made along the way. Keyleth was becoming a leader and gaining her confidence, but there’s something unbelievably validating about hearing it from a mentor and a friend too. Marisha’s tears were our tears. It was extremely cool of Pat to do this, but it was even cooler of Marisha to absolutely face it head-on. 
3. Beau and her Family     First of all, the incredible difference between Beau and Keyleth is just endless. She has the range.      If you have any experience with family like Beau’s, this was painfully familiar. Everything about this scene was visceral and grounded in an uncomfortable reality, and yet the dedication Marisha has to that truth is one of my favorite things about her. She never backs down from the tension or shys away from showing the ugly parts of relationships. She’s a truthseeker in every sense of the word and this scene really brings that point home. We can see, feel, and hear in the way she moves and talks how Beau feels about each person in this house, and how she feels about her new family in comparison. We see how hard Beau is trying to keep it together while still having a few of those walls broken in a bit from having a safe space for awhile. She put a few back up, but perhaps not enough, or not as much as she used to for her home-life. We see the cracks, and we see her struggle against the urge to run. It hurts, but its also kind of cathartic to see it played out with such honesty.
4. Beau and Caleb (uhh. x , x, and x)     Speaking of uncomfortable, nothing is more fun to watch from an acting standpoint than Empire Siblings. Both of these people know what it means to create conflict and they savor it. Marisha’s dedication to Beau’s specific mindset is never more clear than when she’s talking to Caleb. It would be an easy choice to have Beau understand him fully, but that’s not where Beau’s head was for a very long time. Beau is a character that had/has things to prove and who throws caution to the wind. Caleb and her could not be more opposite, and Marisha clearly relishes the difference. All of their conversations are SO incredibly uncomfortable, but in such a RIVETING way. And the progression! Slowly, steadily, Marisha has Beau understand her friends more and learn to speak their languages. Its so good and its so fun to watch play out in essentially real-time. The scenes where Marisha has Beau apologize or come to characters directly in order to help them out?? Amazing mixture of old!Beau and new!Beau. Such a good portrayal of someone who still feels uncool doing it, but knows its the right thing to do and is willing to give it a shot.
5. Beau Gets High    Marisha is another that is so much fun to watch at live shows. Theatre kids, man. The choice she made here was so perfect and so not what Taliesin expected, which is funny on its own, because this seems like such a quintessential Marisha choice. She is SUCH a good physical comedian because, again, she sells it. And! And! She’s so fucking smart too because the tension of the Essek confrontation really needed this scene! The audience needed this scene so that we could be punched in the gut later. She made the choice to play the comedy up in order for the rest of it all to come down even harder than it would have normally - and to give us some much needed reprieve. I just... like, the TIMING of all of it, from what she was saying to how she was moving her head to follow the invisible fish? Brilliant.
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readbythestarlight · 4 years
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c2e97
Live showwwwwww
Live... show?
Live show where are you??
Oh boy here we go!
He absolutely looks like a youth pastor on the first night of camp
"If a room is 50% laughs and 50% groans Taliesin adds 5 years to my life."
[[MORE]]
I’m not gonna be able to make it even to break at this point but I’m glad they were cool and got everyone seated
Okay what do they look like
ayyyyy cute!!
I like the matching robes
Ashely is stunning as always
That cloak is too short for attacks lol
Goddamn Marisha
Liam going with a proper Caleb cosplay
Sam the leprechaun man
That most normal he’s ever looked at a live show xD
Matt looks good in the cloak
Taliesin’s hair is amazing
There’s a little pirate leaking into his leprechaun
....I’m gonna miss Nott
"You’re such a smooth talker Fjord"
"....Yeahhhh..."
My full expectation: Caleb: "I wpuld like to cast fireball at that ship"
lol Nat1
petting a pupper
Y: "it’s not a journey unless people are... killed... along the way?"
This is quickly devolving into more stupidity than usual :P
They are all in the mood to be little shits tonight xD
OOOO they didn’t think the M9 would show up and
NO
Matt
You wouldn’t
NOT ESSEK
fuCK YOU MATT
conflict is good at least he feels bad about it but FUCK
affection is good but I’m SAD
"Maybe you should try friends sometime"
Oh god but now Caleb has heard and everything sucks
J: "and he said we were friends!!"
My heart
Even if they forgive Essek he’ll be doomed if the Dynasty ever finds out
C: "I feel like a fool."
God Caleb what a mood
Just as I relaxed and felt safe
I’m genuinely hurt and it’s so dumb but
Okay... okay I’m glad they’re not judging him so hard
Er. Well. Most of them.
Like Cad and Fjord and Jester at least are trying to give him the benefit of the doubt
I have to go to bed now so I can work tomorrow and this is just going to weigh on me
This Marion bit is cracking me up but my heart is still broken
lol Marion freaking out about the Traveler
Beau lol
Marion lol!!
Cad’s like we do NOT want to bring mom to this
Awww Marion’s going out!!
C: "are you sure you are ready?"
N: "no... but I’m gonna do it anyway."
Now I really do have to go to bed ugh
Okay here we go
Back just in time for Nott’s sweet sad possibly goodbyes
Goodbye Nott, hello Veth!
Skslajdkwks omg Sam
I’m so emotional!!
The golem they all forgot they had? Sure why not xD
Oh no all dressed by Jester?
Yasha xD
I feel BeauYasha in this fish market tonight
Okay Caleb’s sounds SEXY I need ART
Oh sweet baby Jesus Beau’s outfit help me
Now THAT’s sexy
Yaaaas Jester
This old creep can choke
jeSTER
ROAST him girl ROAST HIM GOOD
Oh my GOD
You two
“Your teacher is a disappointment to many others” nICE
Guys don’t
Don’t paralyze him what are you doing
Oh Caleb no
Matt: WELCOME TO THE MIGHTY NEIN TRAVIS
Leave him aloooooone this is not how I want this confrontation to happen
“Friend” ouch
He sounds so sad
I’m so sad
Essek they love you and I love you
“I am but a humble, selfish creature.”
Babyyyyy
Babe they’re offering you a chance please take it
He had better get his journey to redemption because if he doesn’t I’m just gonna be heartbroken forever
I’m literally crying Caleb getting on his knees and turning Essek to face him
Like not even in a shippy way I don’t even care about that but I was worried they would all be so mad at him
Caleb acknowledging that they’ve made very similar mistakes
Okay Liam you’re just looking to kill me huh
“You were not born with venom in your veins. You learned it. You LEARNED it.” Oh. Oh, Caleb, sweetie.
I
CANNOT
WITH
A FOREHEAD KISS
Goddamn Liam O’Brien
This is everything I wanted ever
Yes hold is hand hug him give him the affection he deserves
“You are... a broken person......you sound like all of us. Welcome to the Mighty Nein.” Oh god here I go crying again
I’m destroyed
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loquaciousquark · 5 years
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E58 (Apr. 16, 2019)
Gooooood evening, everyone! @eponymous-rose may have social obligations she was actually looking forward to tonight, but I had a birthday party I was desperately trying to get out of, and so I am here, and Henry is also here, looking immensely put-upon at this human flopped on his pillow.
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Tonight’s guests: Liam O’Brien & Taliesin Jaffe. Liam’s shirt is remarkably Tal-ish tonight. Rep it, boys.
Tonight’s announcements: New campaign journals available at therooktheraven.com/criticalrole. They’ll be at Denver Pop Culture Con next week MONTH! sorry!--Ashley will be there too! It’ll be the first time everyone’s been at a con together...possibly ever! Liam: “Four years in the making.” Everyone’s sick & Brian took Nyquil thirty minutes ago. This should be an interesting evening. Three days left in the Kickstarter campaign! Earlier today, they cracked $10 million, which means Travis’ll be filming himself traipsing through a haunted house. Good heavens. This Thursday, about half an hour after CR ends, Joel Hodgson from MST3K will be coming on the show to hang out with the guys & celebrate.
And now...Episode 58: Wood & Steel
CR Stats: briefly derailed by accusations that Brian’s hair looks like a shark fin. Caleb’s spent 1475 gold on paper and ink so far. Liam: “God, grad school, man.” Caduceus has used Eyes of the Grave 13 times. “It’s a little panic spell, really. Every now and then it helps. It’s nice to be able to walk into a room and go, ‘hey, is there anyone undead in here?’“ This episode was Yasha’s first natural one stealth check. “Not Ashley’s, though.” “No.”
Tal’s shoulder is still peeling from Ashley’s roast of Sam pre-show last episode. Neither Liam nor Tal think Sam was really prepared for it, and now Sam’s working overtime to make up for it. The president we deserve, honestly.
Re: Cad’s check on Fjord: “Clay loves these people. On the other hand, he also has a sense about what an addict is. I love you, I trust you, and I’m gonna go through your wallet real quick.” He was trying to validate his own trust in Fjord just in case he needed to stop him doing anything dumb later.
Taliesin is REALLY excited (one might say gleeful) about making Travis’s haunted house experience as terrible as possible. Brian suggests tasers in case Travis starts barreling through walls in panic.
Caleb is feeling as if he’s blown a bit of his cover lately; the filthy disguise that he’s maintained for so long is pointless now. He’s expecting someone to come “knocking at the door soonish.”
The whole idea of consecution really, really messed Caduceus up. “Clay doesn’t know what to think. This is definitely a...bedouin monk having someone try to explain the flying spaghetti monster to him. It feel offensive and yet harmless...something’s rubbing him the wrong way and he doesn’t know what it is yet. He’s not really about the souls--that’s not what his order is about. His order is about flesh & what happens to the remains; the souls are the souls’ business--that’s what the Raven Queen is for. He’s not sure if it’s his own prejudices.”
Caleb has to think of Nott as a totally different person now. He doesn’t know what she wants, if she wants to run off with her husband now. His feelings for her haven’t changed. He thinks they were codependent for a long time, but now he’s faced with the reality that she doesn’t need him nearly as much as he needs her anymore. He hasn’t even had a chance to talk to her lately “because he’s not even sure if the script is the same.”
Marisha bombs the set with a laser pointer nerf gun. I am so happy I’m not kidding.
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They discuss who did the laser pointer addition (Christina) and attempt to shoot off Brian’s hand. It misses & hits a plush. Brian: “You almost hurt Molly. Oh, wait.”
Clay hasn’t quite figured out the interpersonal relationships of the group yet. He’s kinda noticed the Caleb/Nott relationship (although it doesn’t make much sense to him), but he has figured out he and Yasha have the most in common. He first thought he’d get along most with Jester because they were both clerics, but now knows they’re completely different people who heal for completely different reasons (one out of enjoyment of healing, one forced). He really wants to keep Fjord & Caleb on the straight & narrow, and he sees his relationship with Yasha as more straightforward “I’ll help you, you help me.” Brian’s interested in hearing what Cad thinks Caleb’s right path should be. Me too!
Tal talks about how when they’re traveling at cons, he sits & thinks about other people’s characters and how he/Clay relates to them.
GIF of the Week! Big Shaft. What more needs be said, really. The winner gets a Cobalt Soul journal which Brian says is available on shop.critrole.com as well as the UK store which is A STRAIGHT UP LIE, BRIAN, THEY ARE 100% SOLD OUT, I LOOKED EARLIER TODAY, WHY DO YOU TAUNT ME WITH THESE LIES. >:((((((
Caleb didn’t ask Waccoh about dunamancy because it wasn’t the right time. Cad is very interested in the staff. Liam likes the Ring of Evasion.
What did Tal think of Fjord’s very Percy-esque intimidation in the last episode? “Take it! Run! Murder them all!” Percy loves the dodeca & would have loved to play with it. Both Liam and Tal marvel at how easily threat came to Travis.
In terms of the broken sword, Cad’s hoping for a lemonade-out-of-lemons situation. Brian & Liam switch seats so Liam can pet Henry. Understandable, really. He feels like it’s the world communicating to him that it is meaningful. “He always moves forward to something that feels meaningful. His job was to speak to people about their lost loved ones. He ran a funeral home. So while he doesn’t entirely understand how people relate to one another, he understands how people function, and he’s fascinated by that.” Tal constantly has to weight if his decisions are based on gameplay or something about Cad’s observations. He’s very acutely aware of the difference between his intelligence and wisdom scores.
Liam dabs & regrets it. Then he talks about how that’s why Cad makes Caleb nervous. It’s like talking to a human lie detector. Tal keeps talking a bit about how Cad sometimes spooks Caleb, but I’m 100% distracted by Henry jumping up & sitting between Brian & Tal. Poor Liam.
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Everyone worries a bit about Ashley’s low AC, except Liam, who worries sarcastically. Ya jerk.
Liam answers an interesting question about Caleb’s selfishness--is his generosity this last episode a show to prove to the group that he’s a team player or is he just genuinely caring more about the entire group? Porque no los dos--he’s trying to keep them alive and working well together, and now he has different reasons to do what he’s doing. “Everything’s changed for him” over the last few episodes.
Everyone discusses how motivations change slowly over time and how it’s not a smooth journey--sometimes they’re selfish one day and selfless the next, and sometimes the “shitty purpose on the macro scale” still has “good happening on the micro scale.” It’s not a straight road and people can backslide. Taliesin: “I love something that’s complicated.” Liam talks about how Percy freed Whitestone and did some very dark things on the way there. Dani: “It’s all part of being one person with lots of facets.”
Fanart of the Week! I really hope it’s that GoT video! Ahh, it’s @morphenominal12′s portrait of Yasha. Okay okay okay, this is pretty good. Respect. At least Liam doesn’t taunt me with a journal I can’t buy. Why do I keep thinking it’ll stop saying “Sold Out” if I keep refreshing the page?
A question points out that all three of Taliesin’s characters come from large families (even if those families are dead or adopted). Tal says he doesn’t know much about being an only child & is from a large family himself. It’s part of starting from what you know, and he likes having a few pre-built relationships that he or the DM can build on later. He says maybe being an only child will be his next challenge.
Very, very belatedly, the crew adds a graphic of dollar signs falling from the top of the screen. They do it three times before everyone realizes it’s because Tal said he’d do only-child plots for money. “And on this show, we spend five minutes deconstructing a bad joke from the tricaster.”
Cad doesn’t know how he feels about consecution. They’re not undead...but what are they? It’s making him a little queasy but he can’t put his finger on it. He’s spent a lot of time thinking about how a nature cleric relates to larger heroic destiny, and about his need to see the kiln.
They tuck in a sleepy Henry. I would die for this dog.
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Liam signs us off with all of Brian’s catchphrases. What a nerd.
And we’re out! Is it Thursday yet?
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arodrwho · 4 years
Text
cr 2.96 lb
nott what the heck u doing
oh man taliesin’s face rn
oh fuck this thing has legendary resistances??
well!! at least that’s one of them gone!!
turn invisible….. :(
scary green gas :((
disintigrate !!!!!
“beau just turns towards caleb with a little bit of her hair burning” [caleb salutes] ldkjgkdhfg
[disbelieving/mocking laura voice] twentY THREE DOESN’T HIT!!
oh no
ohhhhh no
beau : ((
“i look at my arm that’s slowly petrifying & i’m like ‘mm! mm-hm!!’” god i love beau
n ice yasha goodjob
“it is a wall of angry mutated beast” oh dear
oh shit!! she can do that??????
god damn!!!!
oh no
man tal’s Face
who got exploded
oh god another one
oh god.
thank god for relentless endurance
god i love these losers so much
“this’ll kill me it’s fine” sdhgkjfdgh
“i’m just gonna stop, and get off the bull [wide eyes] and that’s my turn” “just like night at the ranch!” dklkjdfhg
oh god. sam why. why always the explosive arrows
there goes another legendary resistance
just 1 more?
“she’s going to throw out her hand and look at fjord and say ‘....get up man’”
oh no.
i love watching ashley do things, it’s great, she’s great
marisha’s math face journey there was. a delight
there goes the third save! nice
oh SHIT
caleb got the hdywtdt!!!
oh shit!!!!!!!
“i’m running immediately to my family members”
i didn’t even realize beau was petrified lmao i was distracted
 “c’mon i have—caduceus?” “one moment. i’ll explain”
“her arm in mid-swing with what looks to be a heavy mace. ‘son of a—!’”
“caduceus?” “it’s been a, it’s been. so long”
oh man
oh MAN
“they’ve also been weaponized in the past. but this one’s heavily twisted, mutated, in ways that remind you of tales of wide corruption utilized by xhorhas” oof
“how, how did you get here, what happened? i see you managed to deal with that thing right over there, thank you for that, hi i’m cornelius, i’m caduceus’s father” gray hair, braided in two sides down the front, tusts at the bottom, kind of a little bit of jewelry
“caduceus’s younger sister” yeah man are we gonna hear, about,, why the younger left home before he did,,,,
“caduceus. thank you” “you were both gone a very long time. i waited and uh. no one returned. and uh. and i know i wasn’t supposed to leave, but i left. was anybody else here?” “i think somewhere around here i saw your mother” :(
oh good constance is still around
“woah, what. hhh—” oh gosh
“picks him up a little bit” go  s  h
“i’m so happy to see you” “i was. i was so worried, i. that thing. where’s, uh. where’s corrin, where’s—” “i came here with corrin—” they weren’t together at the kiln, when did
oh god
oh god his aunt
oh no
: (
colton, clarabelle, calliope--is that all? is that all??? caduceus i’m dying
you only have three siblings?????? hello???????????
i’m cackling
“ok, so that’s uh… 29?” “jesus christ, you guys are level 11??”
h’ohhhh
hey i love cornelius
“oh well that is good news. that is great news. you did this?” “group effort” “but he did the glass part” dlkgfdkjg
“a bit of time has passed since then” “two-hundred years”
“see, it’s not as bad now is it?” dgkjhdf i love jester
are these nerds all adopted into the stone family…. do i have to love them eternally…………
“i take the uh, dragonborn head i’ve been kinda carrying round and i just kinda chuck it in the ocean” b EA U
“how long have your parents been stone” “i don’t know. it was. it was quite a while when they first left, when you arrived, when did you arrive?”
i’m pretty sure they weren’t together, matt said? but--oh maybe they meant that colton didn’t arrive with those two. i see
“we’re. we’re stalwart. we’ll be fine, whatever happens”
“i think i got confused” “me too, a couple times. honestly i thought calliope was gonna be the one to do it” “calliope reaches into her pocket and pulls out a similar piece of crystal” “i would’ve beaten you brother i’m just saying” “would you’ve?” “[pinches fingers]” lskdlgkjdhfg
“and who are you?” “i’m beau i’m not important” “i’m yasha i’m very important” skdgkjdhfghfgh
calliope is vry queer isn’t she
this wordplay is befuddling him so much
i love it
“ah...you’ve made some friends” “i’m aware. it’s. it’s a lot”
CUPCAKE SANDWICH
“about a quarter of them are dragonborn” ah
yeah i love this
i was holding out for the clays to be mismatch bunch, but this is vry nice
“i’ve roasted fjord a bunch of times” lkhgk nott oh my god
“super macabre and kinda fucked up” “hey that’s mighty judgmental of you” “i’m just sayin”
“i like her” gjdh she queer
“colton and clarabelle” god heck the damn bro
that’s ?? everyone????
whaaaaat the fuuuuuuuck
i wasn’t expecting that, i thought there’d be like
a whole thingummy?
“i’m fine sleeping outside the dome, i don’t need the—” oh caduceus
buddy………….
“don’t do it, but if you do do it, do it to colton. don’t do it, but if you do do it” cad u c e u s
“are you a follower of the traveler yet” goodness
caleb is encouraging this because…?
“this other...this ginger elf man thing” ldkhg
“he does. i do like him for that” “he’s a little creepy” “well if you’re being honest,s o is she sometimes. but in the sweetest way” “if i am being honest she is occasionally creepy. i have seen her do things with an axe that make even me blanche and i am a twisted individual” ldkhg
“where are you at?” o man
“you don’t want to be a goblin?” “i don’t” “what’s going on in here has nothing do with what’s going on in here, so [words]” “the outside has no bearing on it” “self, what is self?” caleb u are saying good things
“but is a reality you must deal with” gosh
“i don’t know how much it’s had an effect on mine” :(
“and if u change back do u know when you’re going to go home or to your family?” “i think i’ve decided, i think i’ve made a decision. but that’s two decisions. i’ve made the first. i think i’m ready to change back. but what happens afterwards, i won’t know until i get there i think” “i support whatever you choose. and i will miss you if you go” “i’ll miss all of you, if i go. i’ll miss you most of all. our time together has been so dangerous and deadly and incredible and it’s been, it’s been wonderful saving your life again and again” “i appreciate it” “i know you’re going to use your life to do godlike things and i hope i’m there to see it” “can i admit something to you” “go ahead” “it is a blessing i have family again. i mean that in the realest sense of the world it has been a blessing to me and i am so grateful for your presence next to me on the road” “i feel the same, i. i don’t know what. what our family is” “mm, work in progress, fair” “yeah. you’re not my. hm. well, baby steps i suppose” “sometimes words ruin it” “and i don’t wanna make anyone shovel 50 pounds of clay while we’re here” “soon” “soon and you’ll be there for it” “of course” “maybe for the last time, good night caleb” “good night nott. the brave” “you two still up” “so much going on caduceus”
“i got a thing i need to do, ignore anything you hear in the next 5 minutes” oh shit boy!!!!!!
“we have a rare gift upon us right now. an empty town, with a bunch of unlocked doors. and no consequences” “oh my god” “we could get into every single one of these huts” “i can learn so much about people i could put dildos over everybody’s bed” lkdghlkdjfhglkjdhfk god i love these guys so much
“so we can ask him, but don’t let him talk us out of it” fjgkfhg
“i.. i am curious about people’s homes” slkhdglkdjfhg ya sha
hey
hey guys
let taliesin do his thing
let him do his thing y’all!!!!
OH GOOD RETURN OF MAIL THEFT
thank u matt
“very very gently quietly walk up to her without disturbing her” ok are u going to apologize or shove her in the lake
ur gonna push her in the lake aren’t—
OHHHH THAT IS SO MUCH FUCKING BETTER
i’m so happy
i’m SO happy
this
is so
fucking good
VERY GOOD
i love this so fucking much
and this is how the crystal falls in the lake
“i run” sdhgkdhfgh
“she knocks ur ass to the ground” sdkjghdlkjrgh
god i love her
“it’s mine now” skdgjh “till you EARN it back” dhg
“be a shame if something happens to colton tomorrow. just sayin” hWAT. oh. ohhhhh
“oh man i missed you” gosh
“i missed you too” gosh
g o s h
“you’re such.. you’re such a you” “i think i’ve gotten weirder” “that’s not even possible” “i know” “what’ve your friends done to you” dfhkg
“maybe some family time will do you good” hmmmmm SHHHH
“you were right about a lot of thigns” ohh??? :)!!!
“i was supposed to stay so the rest of you can leave” mmmmboy
“i may not be done. i don’t know how to tell mom and dad yet” mmmmMMM!!
o shit boy they’re doin this
“i owe such a debt, and i don’t—i don’t know if. i don’t know if i’m ready to plant”
“and then you can leave” :(
“and she pushes you into the pool” lsdhghdg
“i make a grab for the hand” lm a o
ksjhfdjhghg hgdshf kldsgj df;a ks gf
W H Y
holy shit y’all
“the exact moment i lost control of” LIKE YOU DIDN’T DIRECTLY INSTIGATE THIS WITH THAT ANSWER MATTHEW
“well,,, i’m asking you to open your heart to chaos” dlkgkhf
“you’re chaotic and i love you?” “you’re very attractive right now” oh incredible
hgkjhg this dragonborn…
amazing
“and may she always give you plenty of milk” oh my GOD jester
“clarabelle and colton in that order” WELL.
i take it colton’s the one you had “issues” with?
ok so cad is actually 2nd-oldest? what
i thought u said he was on the younger end of the kids
what
guess u were still formulating him at the time tho
oh very dear
hi colton
are u gonna be pleasant
“d’you save me?” “sure” did he curse?? or
“the word una” how dare you.
how dare you mr obrien.
“together once more” ohhh boy
“and i don’t care for the food, to be honest” dkgf
yea i was gonna say. u got an uthodurn circle y’all
god this episode is so long
nyooooom they’re gone
god i would die for cornelius clay
i would DIE for cornelius clay
yeeeee reani!!
moss cupcakes.. for the hag…..
“blind...sided by.. bias” god i love beau
“he has a face i want to punch” skdhgj
“you’ll punch him the next time you see him right?” “of course” god i love beau
ohhhh caduceus was the reliable one even before all this
oh no
oh No
i’m. sad
i’m SAD
“they’re very weird. …..like us” i love
“i will admit, i wish some of them would choose to come back when it’s time. i would love to see what grows” god i love caduceus. he’s so fuckin weird
“i’m gonna say goodbye to the idiots and uh, i’ll be home soon” god i  l o v e  him
“she also kinda weird? ….i’m excited” god i fucking LOVE cornelius
“she means you’re her favorite” “i know, it’s going to be so hard no to tell them” dkjhgldfkjhgh
ohhhh buddy
they’re all so goddamn weird i love them
calliope has the patience of a saint
“the whistle tonight. for me” lskgkhf
ouch
no gift for colton
“you have a lot of siblings dude. fuuuuuck” dude
that’s only 3
3 is not a lot siblings
…..jester what are you doing
what
...no like for real what the fuck
??????
what the fresh hell are you doing
?????????????
oh dear
yeah what taliesin said what’s that smile for
no like what IS this for though
why are you requesting, this
OHHHHHH
OH I SEE
CUPCAKE DELIVERY!!!!!!
god i love jester so goddamn much
shit boy i die
goodness gosh
eyyyy nicodranas!!
kldgfdkjhgjf rip yussah
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marishasscott-blog · 7 years
Text
The beginning of the End "o"
This is my story.
August 2016, I had just launched my first business & secured a great career in banking. All was going well. I was working, parenting, working out, flourishing as a young woman making a world for herself and child.
Every week I was teaching twerkout classes alongside my former partner, going to workout boot camps, doing private events, using coconut oil, hair was long, I was skinny, booty was getting bigger, no man problems. I was healthy. I was young. I was growing and flourishing. So I thought. Every week I was also bleeding until no end. I’m thinking yea, here we go again, just my period. Until 14 days later and I’m still playing peek a boo. One week I had gotten really sick and just wasn’t feeling my best. My former partner, who wasn’t the most emotional being, was even concerned so I knew it had to be serious. I remember sitting down on the toilet, during a really heavy cycle of course and when I wiped myself after going to the restroom, I looked on the handful of toilet paper and it was the biggest clot of blood I’d ever ever seen in all my years of wiping myself during my cycle. I panicked. I texted my former partner and one of my best friends Brittany Hart (who by the way makes any type of cake you could imagine and they taste amazing considering cake is all I could just about eat at this point <—– shameless plug ) at the same time telling them about the clot. All three of us are freaking out like OMG! We all immediately get on google and the first thing that pops up is miscarriage **stale face**. I’d only been dating my then boyfriend for like a month BARELY and he was on his way out the door, I immediately apologized to God for not making the best life decisions in men and then realized at that point, I HAD to go to the doctor. I hate the doctor. They just get too personal — much like this tea I’m spilling.
I made the doctors appointment and I go. As the doctor is all up in my grill, by that I mean I’m sure his whole hand was in my vagina while pressing on my already enlarged uterus **face palm**. He lets out a small sigh, “My dear, I believe you are pregnant”. I looked in disbelief. There’s only one way this could have happened. The doctor wasn’t sure, but was sure. He gave me some prenatal vitamins (I kept in my trunk because I didn’t want my mom to know) and told me to come back next week to get the results of the blood work and to go next door and get an ultrasound. When I went next door, I was expecting to see a baby. Yep. Nope. So I got confused. With my son, they couldn’t find him either so I was like great. This is happening all over again. The tech took pictures of nothing (so I thought) because my uterus was seemingly empty and I went home. Brittany was on my tail like tell me tell me tell me. I regretfully told her what the doctor said and she was like, “what are you going to do with two babies? Are you ready for that!?”
A week goes by. Yes I had been sneaking and taking the prenatal vitamins just in case. I have my follow up appointment. Where I thought my life was about to change because of one reason, a totally different one ensued. The doctor explained to me that my left reproductive side was completely destroyed. It was full of clusters of ovarian cysts, infection, my Fallopian tube was so enlarged because of all the infection trapped around it and the only thing he could do was remove it. And soon. I asked how soon (by this time it was September) and he said as soon as he could find an open surgery day. His next date was September 21 ! It had to be like the 11th already. Two weeks!
I had never had any major surgery before. Especially not one where he had to open me up right below my abdomen from side to side, the scar I still have to prove I’m a ninja warrior ! I was nervous! I was also excited that my problem would be solved. Ha! Pinned ya again!
Sept. 21 came and before I knew it I was in the recovery room. I was cured!!!!!!! I was noooottttttttt *sad face*
My doctor told me while performing the surgery, where he had already removed half of my baby factory, he found ENDOMETRIOSIS. I already knew OF it because of a friend who “mentioned” having it (in college I wasn’t worried about someone cramping, doubled over in pain because of her period – I now know) and because a family member has it as well. My OBGYN told me, its bad. It’s nothing I can do besides put you on a treatment called Lupron. I had NO more choices. Even with the Oophorectomy (removing ½ of my baby factory not that I had anyone to reproduce with) he said it was NOTHING he could do.
I was off work about 8-11 weeks recovering and I progressively got worse. I remember crying to my mom, standing in the shower screaming, I JUST DON’T FEEL GOOD! I could see the discomfort in my moms eyes, for she too had dealt with this and knew this was something I’d have to figure out on my own. It wasn’t like she could open up my scar and climb in there and massage my insides or have an Indian styled come to Jesus meeting with my hormones to tell them to leave me alone! I felt like I had been chopped open for nothing. I was still sick !
During the recovery and “getting used to” period, I was still trying to work and parent and I transitioned to Nashville for a job in what I thought was my career. Banking. I kept getting sick. I kept bleeding. January rolls around and I know I was in bed the whole month. I found a new OBGYN and asked a second opinion about the Lupron. She then told me first, she wanted to do ANOTHER surgery. To actually remove as much Endo as she could. Here we go again. Through call outs, pain killers, doctors appts, I made it through to February (the next available) and went under the knife AGAIN! In all I have 5 scars and I still have the endometriosis. That recovery from the laparoscopic surgery was the WORST! And I STILL have the endometriosis.
After the recovery, the Lupron was ordered. I was told it can go two ways. Either it helps and no symptoms or it can help and make you feel the worst you’ve ever felt in your life. I guess you can decipher between the two and figure which side of the spectrum I’m on. Blah. I’ve been on treatment for 4 out of 6 months and it’s been the hardest of my life. I can’t work. I’m always sick. I’m always moody. I’m always crying. I’m always hungry but I’m limited to only eating air if I don’t want a flare up. I’m always dissatisfied with weight. I’m always tired. Im always hot and having a hot flash. Im always telling people I’ll call them back. I’m always taking medicine. Im always calling the doctor. I’m always always always! Lupron is a form of chemo. So only imagine how strong this medicine is. Everyone says “IDK why u out yourself through that”, “That’s why I can’t take medicine”, “I wouldn’t do that to myself”. Well, when it’s the only option besides ANOTHER surgery, I can only pray and take my chances. Endometriosis has stopped me from doing everything. I’m literally a living vegetable. Ironic ! It’s too late to turn back now and too early to tell if I’ll ever be normal (one of my daily prayers) again, so I’m stuck in the middle. Only way to know if it works is to keep following my journey with me as I keep torturing myself each month with treatment ! *fingers crossed* And before you say it, yes I’ve tried natural self care remedies.. natural isn’t always the answer. Especially at stage IV (4).
Endometriosis is more than a period. It’s a disability. You can’t look at someone and tell they have Endo, but you can have more compassion for them when they are “just cramping”. My journey is far from over, and it’s a struggle I deal with by the minute ! It will get better !
My name is Marisha, and I have Endometriosis.
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Quote
  #IMWAYR is a weekly meme started on J Kaye’s blog and then was hosted by Sheila from Book Journey. Sheila then passed it on to Kathryn at The Book Date. What I Read Last Week: Neverworld Wake by Marisha Pessl I’ve heard good things about one of this author’s other books, Night Film but I haven’t had a chance to read it. I chose this one first because I fell in love with the edition’s cover on Barnes and Noble and the premise sounded interesting. I wasn’t sure at first that I would like it when I first started reading (which seems to be a common thought lately). It’s a very unique read to say the least. It could have a genre of its own …. thriller/time warp/sci-fi or something. But the more I got into it the more I ended up really loving it. And by the end… well I was crying. Which I hate, but it usually means I really enjoyed the book.  Rating: 4.5 of 5 Stars! The Sea of Lost Girls by Carol Goodman I picked this one up on a whim after Amazon recommended it to me while shopping for other books. I’ve never heard of the author before or read any of her previous works. Just like Neverworld before it I wasn’t sure I’d like this book at first. Tess is the quintessential helicopter mom and let’s face it, Rudy is weird. We’re drawn into the mystery when Tess picks her son up at 3am on a Point surrounded by water that’s off limits to students at the fancy prep school Rudy attends and Tess and her husband teach at. He’s sopping wet and he’s just had a fight with his girlfriend…. A girlfriend who is found dead early the next morning. Tess is drawn into a web of secrets and lies as she attempts to protect her son from falling under suspicion. But as the reader follows Tess down twists and turns and learns of her own sordid past you’re kept guessing until the breathtaking end. I wouldn’t say this book is perfect, but I couldn’t put it down. I finished it in a single day.  Rating: 4 of 5 Stars Currently Reading:  The Night Swim by Megan Goldin Okay, say it with me… I wasn’t sure at first if I’d like this book when I started reading. I’m actually still not sure I want to finish it. Rachel (the main character) is not the problem. Neither is half the plot… the true crime podcast, the trial, even the subplot of Jenny Stills’s death so long ago. It’s Hannah and her psycho-stalker ways of trying to get Rachel to help find out who killed her sister. Any sane journalist would have had Hannah arrested for stalking by now. I guess we’ll see where it goes and if Rachel and Hannah ever meet face to face.  The Night Swim releases August 4, 2020 -  Next Read: The Wife Who Knew Too Much by Michele Campbell I’ve been waiting to read this one until closer to the release date (July I believe) but I can’t wait any longer. Ms. Campbell is one of my favorite thriller authors and I’m ready for her next twisty read.  *** What have you been reading lately?
http://taylorfenner.blogspot.com/2020/06/its-monday-what-are-you-reading-1-june.html
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beetlemancy · 5 years
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amusingdisplacement replied to your post “xombigirl replied to your post: an interesting...”
it seems to be a function of people pushing back against (the perception of?) caleb as the most loved/shipped character (which...is he? widomauk is (was?) the biggest c2 ship, but that seems to have far more to do with molly tbh? that's a whole other tangent though). people seem to think one of the reasons caleb fans like him so much is because he/liam is hot and so then seem to find satisfaction in going "but he's not really!!"
this is actually an interesting take - i was thinking this, but you put it into much better words than i could. i have Thoughts, and they are L O N G: 
i think all of fandom is a reaction. a lot of the Caleb love, at least in the tags, is often in response to the Caleb hate. and a lot of the Caleb hate is in response to the Caleb love. but then again ... IS that where it comes from? maybe for some people.
i was just talking with someone over pm about this, but i think its relevant : there is a lot of marisha hate in this fandom. we all know this and acknowledge it and actively try to beat it back. but i think we all focus too hard on the obvious hate and not the insidious hate. 
the biphobia in this fandom during CR1, for instance, was hella strong and was leveled down on Vax. It was said, by people who hated him, that he “stole” Keyleth’s story and that he forced himself into a relationship with her. That he should have stuck with Gilmore and that he wasn’t really good LGBTQ rep because of his relationship with Keyleth. These were things said by people who claimed to be Keyleth fans.
Two things about that: 1) they took away Keyleth’s agency, the agency that she canonically had in the story, and MARISHA’S agency too,  in order to spin it so Vax was Bad and 2) By definition they implied that Keyleth/Marisha was at fault for “ruining” Vax’s bisexuality. 
Obviously this is incredibly unfair and half the time they don’t even understand that’s what they’ve implied. Marisha-hate has many faces.
Here’s the relevance: I’m seeing a repeat of that shit in CR2, just minus the romance. The “liam character hate squad” tends to really pull for Beau. (also, disclaimer, I am NOT saying that if you don’t like caleb and do like Beau that you are automatically in this group - its more nuanced than that) But often what I see and hear is that Caleb’s story doesn’t matter. Their reasoning for this could very well be because he is “too loved.” But what does that mean for the other characters? What does that mean for Beau’s story? They are ENTWINED. He is like a brother to her. He supports her, she supports him. She has admitted to loving ALL of the M9, including Caleb, and she goes out of her way to hang out with him now. So why ignore an entire aspect of Beau’s journey just to spite the fandom who likes Caleb? Why ignore Marisha’s RP? She’s actively seeking Liam out as scene partner - why would the people who claim to love her be so adamant that those interactions are wrong?
Again, I’m just talking about the people who take it all a step too far. We can react to things in fandom. This entire post is a reaction. But the push-pull of fandom has to stop SOMEWHERE, and I think when we hit “I hate this character and therefore will hate everything about him including aspects of his character that exist in real life and I’m gonna talk about how I hate those aspects in the main tag/feed” territory, we’ve gone too far. 
Which is, I suppose, how I’m bringing it back to Caleb’s appearance. To ignore canon, to ignore other characters, and to edge (and in some cases blatantly hop) into antisemitism just to spite a character you think gets too much attention seems unbelievably gross to me. 
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loquaciousquark · 5 years
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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E56 (March 26, 2019)
Gooooood evening, everyone. @eponymous-rose is taking a well-deserved break, so I’m stepping in to ruin reputations and botch direct quotations all over the place. Here to give us the appropriate gravitas and fear for the evening is the Chamber of Chairs:
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Tonight’s guests: Liam O’Brien & Marisha Ray. Dani flips Liam off to start the show and it’s pretty funny. “What did I doooo?”
Tonight’s announcements: Last night was the season finale of Between the Sheets, featuring Ashly Burch, who is shockingly short in person. The VOD’s up for subscribers now, and it’ll be posted on YT tomorrow for everyone else. The Ashley Johnson episode will be up soon! Yay! Remember, no new episode of CR this week, and no new episode of TM next Tuesday as a result. Normal CR broadcasting resumes April 4. The Kickstarter hit $8 million today. Liam: “Oh boy oh boy oh boy it’s fine it’s fine IT’S FINE.” The final goal is $8.8m with 23 days to go, and a behind-the-scenes filming of the theme song was posted today on the KS. The video’s actually pretty cool & features Ashley in a feather boa!
Anyway! Episode 56: The Favor
CR Stats! This was the shortest episode of this campaign at 2h19m15s of gameplay. Only Shopping and Shipping from C1 was shorter. This episode tied for the fewest spells cast in one episode (six) and all were cast by Caleb. Over the 44 episodes & 136 days the M9 had the dodecahedron, they gained 25 fragments of possibility and actually utilized 13. 
Liam and Marisha talk about having a timer in the office: “It has been 27 days since the last Holy Fuck ending.”
None of them thought Matt was going to cut it off at that point, but when he explained he wanted Taliesin there for the next part, it made sense to all of them & they all agreed it was for the best.
Beau has four thousand thoughts racing through her head right now. One of them is excitement about getting to learn the Kryn more, but she’s also terrified. Henry interrupts with the most adorable baying howl and he walks offstage. What a good pupper.
Liam describes the moment as everyone frozen in amber as they wait for the next episode. Beau will figure out something to her advantage between now and then.
Marisha likens this moment to the Emon attack and the Lorenzo fight with Molly in terms of emotional shock. Brian remembers Sam was in a tux that night; Marisha: “I knew it was going to be a funeral tux.”
There’s another question about how Marisha/Beau feels about the dodeca handoff, and both Liam and Marisha start laughing about how this entire TM episode is just going to be about the ramifications of Caleb’s decision. Liam: “No regrets,” but he understands there’s going to be a lot of fallout. They talk about how the ramifications will depend on how public the Krynn make their gift: will it be parades in the streets, a handshake and dismissal from a private room, etc? What if there was a Dairon-type spy in the room who’ll tell people they don’t want to know about their actions? They’re eager and afraid to see the fallout.
Brian points out everyone could see on Travis’s face he would rather have gone to jail, but further discussion is derailed by questions.
The group had discussed the possibility of handing off the dodecahedron in the past, but he hadn’t considered ever handing it off until the last sixty seconds when “everything was going to shit. It was more mathematical than anything. It felt a lot like Avantika. We’ve got a plan, the plan’s broken, but we can get away, no, we can’t get away, now this is changing--I don’t want someone outside our group to control the situation if I can act first, if I can punch first. Everyone’s trying to negotiate and it’s failing, I don’t want to give up this thing either, I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die, here’s--this.” Caleb wanted to save the group. He wouldn’t have taken the gamble even two minutes earlier. Then, suddenly as it began to work, he & Caleb began realizing that not only did it work, but it worked very well and now his brain had split into two: “oh, thank God, I care about these people, I can save them,” and “how do I use this to my advantage.”
Caleb was quiet through most of this episode because he really wanted to discuss several things in private with other group members--that’s what he was thinking about for most of this.
Dani points out everyone expected physical travel between this fight & the audience with the queen where there would be downtime to discuss things. None of them expected immediate teleportation.
If Beau had been in a position to stop Caleb from giving up the beacon, she would not have stopped him.
Beau was wincing as Nott & Jester asked questions they should have already known the answers to. Liam points out it’s the war room in Dr. Strangelove--only the most powerful people would have been there. Beau dislikes authority but doesn’t think she’s stupid enough to have gotten herself seen as an obvious traitor.
Everyone revels in Matt’s Caduceus impression.
GIF of the Week: Liam pulling the dodeca out of the haversack by Will D. Brian singsongs “Travis is tilted~, Travis is tilted, look at his face~” over the GIF playing. Haaaaaahaha, poor Travis.
Liam: “I think I’m just in the shithouse.” Marisha: “You blew the shit whistle.”
Brief hilarious aside where they discuss Tetanus Terry (ft. on Travis Willingham’s YeeHaw Game Ranch) & Caleb Widogast getting fully replaced by Terry as a backup character if he gets assassinated.
On a scale of 1-10, Beau is following Dairon’s advice to a 7. She’s trying not to get attached, not to die, to listen, to not get impatient, to not be biased. She’s probably going to get closer to people than Dairon would suggest, but thinks she’s trying pretty hard.
It wasn’t cathartic for Caleb to renounce the Empire like this. His parents were very pro-Empire, and now that he’s on this journey to atone for his parents’ deaths, he’s done exactly the last thing his parents ever, ever wanted him to do--walked into the heart of the enemy and gave them everything they wanted. (Brian, Liam, & Dani briefly rag on Tumblr still having faint life somewhere. “Female-presenting nipples” comes up. It’s funny and also very sad.)
Brian discusses how it’s a big moment, but it’s not a victory for the group. Caleb was just shooting for a short-term immediate solution. Marisha: “It feels like a sitcom bait-and-switch. Nah, it’s cool, guys, we’re gonna pretend to be waiters and we’ll sneak into the kitchen,” but then they sneak into the kitchen and the cook laughs that the sous-chef is out today, and “now we’re in over our heads!”
Brian reveals dramatically that last night he came out as a supporter of Liam for President of D&D Beyond. Liam: “Beneath all the chicanery & hair product, there is common sense."
Liam & Marisha talk about the difference between Nott/Caleb’s original first podunk jail and this potential maximum security prison.
Caleb imagined the BDSM straps over his shirt and coat. Apparently most of the fanart generated this week has failed to include them. 
Both Marisha & Liam VEHEMENTLY agree they hated not being able to be main parts of the Brightqueen talks. They also talk about how they both are far better at CHA than Nott & Jester, though they point out in fairness that Matt’s told them he always adjusts the social DCs based on the arguments they make.
As far as the slavery part of the disguise, Marisha: “Marisha has laughed at every piece of fanart. Beau was surprised. Beau’s gonna have a talk.” She (Beau) felt they had discussed the costumes, the pretense--but not the bullying & active degradation her group put her through. It was huge, an eye-opening moment for Beau in a way she (Beau & Marisha) absolutely did not expect. She never thought they would abuse their status over her in that way.
They discuss how on a meta sense, they all knew that the scene was just Travis and Laura trolling them and having fun at their expense, but at the same time it’s still happening in game and will have in-game consequences. Marisha: “It’s like at a party where your good friend starts getting a little too drunk and starts making fun of you a little too much--it’s a little too real.”
That said, one of Marisha’s favorite fanarts from this week was Beau (as a table) swearing under her breath at Jester with her feet up. It’s an interesting juxtaposition.
Fanart of the Week: The Brightqueen by Nikki Dawes.
Beau does not feel she’s betrayed anyone by being present at this event. She knows where her allegiances lie, so just because this happened doesn’t mean it’s changed anything about what she believes. That said, she has no love for the Empire. She’s very personal with whom she cares about. She doesn’t have as much obvious disdain as Caleb does--she’s just more indifferent.
Caleb has a high CHA that he just doesn’t use anymore, because the people he knew with high CHA that used it did so to do bad things. Liam thinks when Caleb was young he was very gifted, charming, and attracted people to him; now it’s all gone. He can hold it together like a sandcastle by the tide for an hour, but in the end it always washes away.
On Nott speaking for the group: Marisha always likes hearing Sam talk. In some ways Marisha felt it was the same thing she used to get for Keyleth-- "why are you talking? You shouldn’t be talking. You shouldn’t be the talker.” Everyone should have their own voice, regardless of the scores on the page. “Your stats are there to influence the effects of what happens; they’re not the Bible. They’re not law.” She reminds us Vex once entered an arm-wrestling contest with a strength of 7.
How does Beau feel now that Caleb’s made another huge decision without consulting the rest of the M9 (i.e. Bowlgate)? It’ll play out in game. It’s a big deal. Liam admits he loves it. “The whole point is conflict resolution, so you need conflict.” He loves things like this, like the Astrid letter, because it opens opportunities to explore characters. In some ways it’s the same thing: they were in an impossible situation and Caleb sees it as protecting his friends, but that’s not how it read to anyone else. Marisha points out that once again he made himself the authority to make this huge decision without discussing it with anyone else in the group.
Marisha and Liam start talking about the decision more, decide it should wait for the game, but then keep talking despite themselves. Marisha points out that on top of his (once-again) unilateral decision, his speech was also framed selfishly (”I did this thing, I brought this back to you,”). To her, it still feels like the same thing with Caleb deciding things with major consequences for the rest of the group without their input, though she admits it’s colored by their (Beau’s & Caleb’s) history. Liam talks about how in the moment he was scared of deception checks, so he just tried to be as truthful as possible--nothing he said was false because he was only speaking for himself. He could not have spoken for the group & still been truthful. It’s a really interesting dichotomous discussion, both of them talking about what they felt in the moment versus how it came across to everyone else.
Liam feels it’s more like seeing someone dying in front of them & wasting time discussing whether they should do CPR or not, rather than him making decisions for the whole group. Marisha’s face obviously disagrees (so do I, ahaha). Liam also thought they were going to continue the episode & talk more, which would have kept it from being as much about him. This is gonna be super interesting when it actually plays out, for sure.
Once again, no new CR this Thursday or TM next Tuesday. Most of the rest of the programming will stay the same. This Tuesday’s Mame Drop will feature Max James of CR production fame.
We end on this eldritch horror:
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"Weuuuh, Caleb knows best! Caleb will make the decisions for all of us in this D&D game!”
Aaand we’re out. Stay turnt.
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nochiquinn · 5 years
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campaign 2 episode 58: the shade of it all
know what's cool about recurring chronic pain is when you wake up and you just HAVE IT and then you have it ALL DAY
ASH O LEE
sam's voltron shirt is swank
all I heard of that was "vote with your johnson" but apparently sam is dead now
"sleeping in" immersion broken
"you seem more alert than usual"
corpse disposal for rent
cad: I'm going with me
"does he need to shave?" "he always needs to shave."
"You're very portable; you can walk yourself anywhere you want to go"
"that's a stick"
it's mcree
travis' eyebrow is trying to escape
travis/fjord's face at "runt"
travis/fjord's whole face journey
fjordie
fjord is rude
orcdad
"even his advice had abs"
I want to know what's in laura and marisha's glasses, it looks fancy
I don't care how much art comes out for this character, I will picture Little Washu and nothing else
it's better than before when I was picturing wakka from ffx
mala: tw humans
is this sam's shark voice
what's in the book caleb
use ur abs to get work
laura and sam pay attention challenge
"roll high. ...I said high."
tal's face at that staff
gems good
angry pigeon
robe of vantablack
"I will PIMPSLAP YOU" "it was him!" "...you'll earn it at some point."
(what did tal say tho; he was very proud of himself)
"I got in the dick"
fuck yeah yeza
"meta medicine" where is sydnee mcelroy
they end up buying horny goat weed
a goblin a halfling and an aasimar walk into a shady potion shop
"matt made them himself!" "he has no life!"
man I wanna try to make those
I love one (1) halfling alchemist
rogues are whatever
mala: I too would give Ashley a 50% discount just bc she asked
THE BAILEY BRIG
"four men named bodo"
"I go extra" that's it, that's the campaign
it was "poof", wasn't it?
this will end poorly
luke baBY
"miss jester" <3
if nott dies after this I will fly to la and fistfight literally everyone
not just the cast. the whole city.
"a little all over the place but alright" my online dating profile
"I haven't looked in my bag in a while" me finding four-month-old recepits
ONE LAST TIIIIIME
everybody getting those mid-season character-development wardrobe changes
that is no one's reaction to biscuits ever. they use CLAWS to make biscuits.
I desperately need art of jester as a camp counselor
matt pls my drowsy pill is kicking in
it's that forest from the Frozen sequel
nott: this is your home. I have decided.
travis you've slept like twice in this episode alone, update your dingdang hp
fjord
FJORD
"I love you so much"
when your district manager starts chewing out your shitty store manager
liam why are you always like this
clay talking to the moorbounders is my new favorite interaction on this show
INCLUDING the five kobolds in a trenchcoat
do NOT goddamn start combat at 1:30 in the morning I will abandon this episode and go the fuck to bed
I dozed off. I warned you, bro, I warned you about 1:30 am
"I rolled a one" "SHE'S BACK"
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