I was training a really bitey, feisty, blue bird today- so have this Google parrot

So so excited to share my @mcytblrholidayexchange gift for @follow-the-compass-home! My concept was to combine a bunch of prompts together into one AU.

The premise is a modern-fantasy roommate situation where Tango, Bdubs, and Etho live together in an apartment. The only issue is that none of them are human, but they're all trying desperately to blend in, even though they don't really understand humanity as a concept.

More information can be found below the cut, and an introductory fic snippet can be found here (x)!

Downstairs Neighbors AU

Prompts used as inspiration:

Focus on Tango, Etho, and Bdubs

Include Boatem

Story told from Grian's perspective

Hybrid/inhuman AU

Angst with a happy ending

Emphasis on character dynamics

Here's a summary!!!

Tango, Etho, and Bdubs found each other by looking for roommates on Craigslist. They live in a 4-bedroom apartment together.

Tango is a spirit who wanted to interact with the world in a physical sense, so he built himself a body. He's basically just a ghost possessing an android (but unlike ghosts, he was never alive; he came into being as a fully-formed spirit). He doesn't adhere to normal bodily necessities like food, water, or sleep, which is convenient but also heavily concerning from an outsider's perspective.

Etho is a specific kind of shapeshifter called a mimic. He doesn't have a true form, but can copy the shape and mannerisms of most living creatures. The only constant across all of his appearances is a scarred left eye and white hair. Unfortunately, it takes practice to nail specific species characteristics, so he often forgets what he's supposed to look like and falls into uncanny valley. He wears a mask to cover his more noticable facial slipups.

Bdubs is some sort of plant creature (he doesn't really understand it himself). He has a perfect internal clock and sleeps, without fail, for 12 hours every night. He spends a lot of time in the unoccupied bedroom-- he uses it as a makeshift greenhouse, and it's filled with grow lights and humidifiers. He loves taking care of houseplants, but it's also a cover for him to spend time under the grow lights. Without enough light & water he gets lethargic.

Bdubs, Etho, and Tango, henceforth referred to as BET, all assume that the others are human. But since none of them know how to act human, they continuously pick up stranger and stranger habits from each other.

BET are close friends with Impulse & Skizzleman, who live together across the hall. Their upstairs neighbors are Grian, Pearl, Mumbo, and Scar, who are also besties with Imp & Skizz. BET and Boatem don't know each other well, but Grian especially thinks his neighbors are really odd.

Like BET, Grian is not human, and neither are the rest of his roommates. But they all know about each other, and Grian especially is really good at knowing how to act natural in public places. He's an avian shapeshifter, who can take the form of either a scarlet macaw or a human. Unlike Etho, both forms come equally naturally to Grian, and the shapeshifting process is a lot easier for him.

(Imp & Skizz are not human either-- they are a demon and an angel respectively. But, like Grian, they're really good at blending in when in public.)

One day, Grian gets injured on a flight and accidentally ends up on BET's balcony instead of his own. He's too disoriented to shift back into his human form or fly away, so Bdubs and Etho find him outside their door. Tango calls Impulse over in the hopes that he knows how to fix the random-injured-parrot crisis, but the only result is that Grian and Impulse start to truly take note of how strange their neighbors' living situation is. Incidents like the one pictured above arise (i.e. everyone finding out that there is not a singular scrap of food to be found in the entire apartment).

Ok that's all the rambling I'll do in this post, but I hope you enjoyed! Happy holidays!!

Animal of the Day!

Cuban Macaw (Ara tricolor)

(Painting by Jacques Barraband)

Extinction Date- 1864

Habitat- Cuba

Size (Weight/Length)- 50 cm long

Diet- Seeds; Fruits

Cool Facts- The Cuban macaw was widespread throughout Cuba but, unfortunately, little is known about their behavior. They were thought to have nested in hollow trees and live in small flocks. They most likely ate hard seeds, like palm nuts, and tough fruits, crushing them with their beak. Cuban macaws were originally hunted for their feathers and meat by native peoples but when Europeans arrived in the 15th century, they were prized cagebirds. The macaws were captured alive and shipped off to Europe to be sold as a pet. A massive hurricane was the nail in the coffin and the rest of the macaws were wiped out. Scarlet macaws remain as the Cuban macaw’s closest relative. While scarlet macaws are considered least concern, they are still threatened by the pet trade and hunting in a similar manner to the Cuban macaw. Conservation efforts to prevent illegal poaching for both dead and alive macaws is in effect throughout their native range.

Rating- 11/10 (One of the smallest macaws and one of the most brilliantly colored.)

All I want to do is teach the birds to pick up the dice and toss it on to the mat, if the series takes off I’ll invest in a dice tower and I can teach them to pick it up and drop it in the tower

Realistically it’s likely not any more hazardous than the macaw shows that take money out of peoples hands. Or the number of birds that chew off people’s nail polish, or the dyes and materials used in things like various piercings and jewelry.

They aren’t going to be chewing it, honestly it’s probably not even something I need to be worried about doing

At this point it’s more a moral decision of “if I make a video showing my birds doing this meticulously trained behaviour with dice will it influence people in to interpreting that as ‘all dice are parrot safe chew toys’” which would obviously not be a good result. Disclaimer perhaps, then that opens the door for people to be like “if you need a disclaimer maybe just don’t do it!”

But a highly trained bird with a prop is a very different interaction than Chew Toy

Moral conundrums

If each of the dragon tribes shot commercials

WARNING: A teensy bit of dark humor related to the mistreatment of a disabled dragon (in the SandWing section)

Skywings: *ultra-manly SkyWing roar voice* DO YOU LIKE BLOOD?? Do you like MEAT!? Are you a TRUE SKYWING and NOT A COWARD??? Come to the Meat Shack and prove your SkyWing toughness by trying out the Meat Shack Meat Eater Challenge!!! Find out if you're a TRUE CARNIVORE by downing this huge array of meaty prey in less than an hour! If you prove yourself to be the biggest, baddest predator in the Sky Kingdom, you'll win this LIMITED EDITION BRONZE ARM BAND that says TRUE CARNIVORE on it, and you eat here FREE for a month!!!

SeaWings: *ocean wave sounds* *video shows a SeaWing couple dancing dramtically on the beach*

SeaWing guy: Mariana...there's something about you I can't resist.

SeaWing lady: I'll tell you my secret...it's the new Citrus Breeze perfume by Pearlescent.

*cuts to showing a bottle of the perfume* *soothing SeaWing lady voice* Pearlescent. Be irresistible.

NightWings: *informative sciency NightWing voice* tired of getting your claws messy when handling prey? You catch an animal and tear it open, and after you eat it, they're covered with blood, hair, and animal fluids. Studies show that having animal residue on your claws can easily make you sick! Well, worry no more! *holds up the new invention, a fork* this device can get rid of the hassle! Simply stab your prey with this thing and avoid the messy talons! Order now, and you get an additional one FREE!

SandWings: *mysterious voice* have you ever seen real magic? Bet you've never seen a dragon pull a jackrabbit out of an empty bag! Or a crow fly out of someone's mouth! Do you want to know your future? Or see a dragon tame the formidable dragon bite viper? What about an adorable lion jumping through a hoop? Or gaze upon the incredible display of a real Color Changing RainWing, and the ridiculous Flightless SkyWing! All these things and more can be seen at the Roadrunner Theatre! Watch dragons do the impossible, right before your very eyes! Do you believe in magic? *poof of smoke as the speaking magician dragon disappears*

IceWings: Are you better than everyone else? Of course you are; you're an IceWing. If you are better, you deserve better--you deserve the luxury of being treated at the Windchill Salon. Get your scales and nails shined, buffed, and polished to look like the glimmering diamond you are! Get a massage, to allieviate the stress of being so much cooler than any other dragon! Take your dragonets here to get their ears pierced, too. Get treated like a royal at the Windchill Salon!

RainWings: *chilled out RainWing voice* Hiya! My name's Budgerigar. Do you ever feel lonely, like you could use a companion that will listen to you, and that you can always have with you? A pet might be the right thing for you! I have a collection of animals in my hut that you can choose to have for yourself! I have birds, sloths, cats, nonvenomous snakes, and some tarantulas! Look, the birds even talk! Say hello, Rainbow Bird!

Scarlet macaw: Rainbow bird!

Budgerigar: That's you! Anyway, I hope to see some RainWings or even NightWings in my shop! I can help you choose your perfect companion. But warning to NightWings-if you eat your pet, I won't give you another one ever again. Come to my pet shop!

Species Notes!

Because I like to creature-fy people

Joey is a humanoid griffin with combined features of a human (most of head), a scarlet macaw (chest and wings, and arms like parrot legs), and a tiger (lower body and tail, and eyes and ears)

Gem and fWhip are children of an unusual couple, they are half fae and half mountain troll

Since they are twins, each parent chose one of their names, so fWhip has a fae name and Gem has a troll name, while a single child would have received a double name

fWhip gets his love and talent for engineering from their mother, while Gem takes a bit more after their father, with a strong penchant for fae nature magic, but shares their mother's love of the mountains

Being fraternal twins, they inherited differing physical traits from their parents as well, for example, Gem gets their mother's thick, smooth hair and short, goat-like tail, while fWhip has their father's long, thin, tasseled tail and fine, more textured hair

fWhip is a bit upset that his hair isn't as strong and won't grow as long as Gem's troll hair, but he much prefers having their mother's short, thick finger nails over Gem's longer fae claws, which he thinks might make it difficult to handle some of his tools

They both have excellent dark vision and are great climbers, as well as both having their mother's tusks and their father's hooked nose, they also both have pointy ears, which is a trait trolls and fae share

Katherine is fully fae, but from a different community than Gem's and fWhip's father, her nose is more cat-like and her ears have fur tufts

Pearl is fully human, but grew up in a fae and human mixed community, so knows and observes a lot of fae cultural customs as well as human ones

Sausage is a human who grew up in a somewhat isolated community, and is initially a little clueless about cultures other than his own, but very willing to learn

Pix is a sand sprite, a pile of sand held together and animated by strong magic. He can add other materials to his form, so long as they are in small particles, he can phase through sand, dirt and even porous stone, and can shape shift to an extent, although he prefers to be broadly humanoid for ease of existing in a humanoid-centric environment

I've already extensively talked about Joel's species here

I've also talked a lot about Lizzie and Jimmy, and Scott and Xornoth, in various other notes posts

And unfortunately, I haven't got many thoughts about Shrub right now, but I might write something about her at a later date

In summary:

Scott and Xornoth: Winged Mountain Elves

Gem and fWhip: Fae/Mountain Troll Hybrids

Pearl: Human

Sausage: Human

Katherine: Fae

Pix: Sand Sprite

Joey: Parrot/Tiger Griffin

Shrub: Gnome

Joel: Clay Folk

Lizzie: Axolotl Merfolk Goddess

Jimmy: Cod Merfolk Demon

Hullo!!! It's not really an idea, I am just blurping a small part of a hurt/comfort desert duo (taking place in third life) fic I'm writing, and I decided to give you Grian comforting Scar :D (also content warnings for mild ableist language)

--

His throat clogged at the thought of Pizza, petting her fuzzy fur, already infested by sand and dirt, feeding her carrots they had stolen from the village, calling her a good girl, and adjusting her headband and her saddle. He missed Pizza. He missed her so much, she didn’t deserve all the hate and the teasing the others inflicted upon her. He just wanted his llama back. His mind wandered back to his nightmare, and he pulled his hair to stop thinking about it, it was only a dream, she didn’t die. 

A sob escaped his mouth and he let his head fall on the table. His shoulder blades and hips complained, a gnawing feeling between them and on his waist. He really didn’t know how he should sit. Should he slouch? Should he roll his shoulders back and sit up straight? Maybe he needed food and water. Should he yell at Grian to wake him up? No, the avian needed sleep, who knew at what time he went to bed. 

“Scar?” A rough voice called. 

Scar froze. Did he wake up Grian? He turned his head slightly to the entrance of the kitchen, not too much so that it required all of his lasting energy, but enough to see one macaw wing stretching out, looking fluffier than the last time he saw it. Grian sat down and inspected him, arms crossed against the table. Scar barely moved. 

“What are you doing sitting here, looking into nothingness?” Grian’s face lightened up a bit, slightly amused. 

Now that Scar thought about it, it was kind of silly sitting here, doing nothing. But he did not appreciate the lighthearted remark when he was hungry, frustrated, thirsty, boiling, and cursing at his body for making his life ten times more complicated. 

He simply sighed in reply, looking at the table instead of those lightning green irises. Grian hummed and stood up.

“You hungry?”

Scar hummed. He wasn’t sure if he simply didn’t have the energy to form words or if the morning dryness in his throat clogged the words in it. He did cry, it might’ve contributed. He heard Grian rummaging in their food barrel. 

“What do you want?”

Scar did not reply. He was simply hungry. He would eat anything at this point. He was mostly thinking how to relieve this ache, this soreness in his muscles. It was slowly beginning to hurt and he did not want to deal with that. 

“I’m making applesauce, the apples are getting bad.”

Grian showed him the apples, asking him if he was actually holding the fruit, and Scar nodded. Grian squinted his eyes as he concentrated on making them food. Scar focused on the noises Grian made around the kitchen. The pots and pans clanging together, the harsh chopping noise, the swish sound the knife made against the peel, the bubbles of the boiling water, anything to distract him from the muscles spasms and the weight on his shoulder, the tension around his neck. 

He didn’t know how long he sat there, listening, picking at his nails, while Grian cooked. His head perked up when the bowl clanked against the table. Grian sat down and started eating, eyeing Scar. Scar tried to pick up the spoon, he really tried. His upper arm didn’t stop spasming, he couldn’t control his movement, so he kept his arm close to his side, letting it pass. He looked at the applesauce and just wished his body could fulfill its own needs without throwing a fit. 

Grian stood up, placed his chair next to Scar’s, and sat down with a big thunk, making Scar jump in surprise. Grian took his bowl and almost shoved the spoon in his mouth. He moved back, a grunt bubbling in his throat and his muscles whining at the sudden movement. Grian rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Scar, you need help and I am offering said help.”

Scar glared at the spoon in Grian’s hand, wishing all the deadly curses at it.  Grian huffed, frustrated.

“Sometimes you just need a break and there’s nothing wrong with that. Look, nobody is gonna come bother us if you don’t want to see people. Heck, I’m sure if I explained the situation to the others, they would totally understand.” Grian’s shoulders slumped, and Scar wondered if that’s how puppy eyes looked. “Please, Scar?”

Scar hesitated. He was hungry, but he really didn’t want Grian to actually be his servant. It was a fun concept, at first. He really hoped Grian was doing this out of the goodness of his heart. He cleared his throat.

“Not part of the debt,” he murmured, making sure to look deep into those electric green eyes, even if they intimidated him. 

Grian blinked at him owlishly. “Of course not!” His accent was more pronounced than usual. “You’re not well, let me help.”

Scar shifted his gaze to the bowl and nodded. Grian fed him, making sure he wouldn’t choke on the applesauce. It was quite good for smashed boiled apples. He could taste some of the sugarcane they started cultivating close to the edge of the roof of the mountain. It sweetened the aftertaste of the acidic flavor the apples left. Scar was quite impressed, and it did fill a hole in his stomach, even giving him a bit more energy. 

After being satiated, Grian moved behind Scar, rolled up the sleeves of his red sweater and dug his thumbs on Scar’s lower neck. Scar winced and inhaled through his teeth, making Grian stutter in his movements.

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

The movement became gentler, rolling his thumbs against the tense part of Scar’s neck. It was quite relaxing, but a lingering pain made the gesture quite uncomfortable, as if someone was applying pressure to a fresh wound. Scar didn’t complain though, he appreciated the physical touch and was glad to know Grian became comfortable with him enough to touch him like this. He hummed in pleasure when Grian’s thumbs massaged his shoulders and traveled against his biceps, feeling the tension loosen up. Grian let out a chuckle.

“Jeez, Scar, are you stressed or something?”

Scar tensed, immediately thinking of his nightmare. The thumbs stopped circling his deltoid, and Grian’s long nose appeared in his peripheral vision. 

“What are you worried about?”

Scar sighed and looked up at the ceiling. Grian’s right hand left his shoulder while his left hand rounded the other before squeezing it reassuringly. His gaze landed on wide bright emerald eyes, on a slightly freckled nose that almost looked like a beak without looking crooked, on rosy cheeks, on dirty blond curls that frame a concerned face. Scar never realized how majestic Grian looked.

“Scar?” Grian inquired.

Scar put his hand on the one holding his shoulder, to touch where he was permitted to. 

“Pizza,” he let out. Grian quirked an eyebrow. “Had a nightmare about her dying,” he confessed, closing his eyes and rubbing his thumb against Grian’s knuckles. 

“Oh, Scar.” A warmed hand wormed itself close to the base of his hair. He shuddered.

“I miss her, G.”

“I know.” The hand nested itself in his hair, bringing his head to Grian’s shoulder. He stuttered a breath.

“Why did they take her away? She didn’t do anything, she didn’t deserve that.”

Scar let out a sob, his body slack from easing tension out with his crying. Grian shushed him, playing with his hair, scrubbing his scalp. It felt amazing, even if the tension in his neck was back. He grabbed the hand that was playing with his hair, stood straighter on his seat, and brought the hand closer to his chest, letting his other hand fall and grasp Grian’s thigh. Grian’s hand was now slowly rubbing circles, and Scar couldn’t be more relieved to receive physical touch.

-- bloop anon who feels less intimidated :D (not enough to go off anon)

ANDNDKDKDKAKA YOOOO THIS IS SO GOOD OMG ANDJDSKSK I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS

I have come with more hurt/comfort 3l!desert duo!!!! This fic has taken over my brain (so has those two tragic drama queens) and I have written a kiss scene for the first time. pls no judgy...

--

“Scar?” A rough voice called. 

Scar froze. Did he wake up Grian? He turned his head slightly to the entrance of the kitchen, not too much so that it required all of his lasting energy, but enough to see one macaw wing stretching out. Grian sat down and inspected him, arms crossed against the table. Scar barely moved. 

“What are you doing, sitting there, looking into nothingness?” Grian’s face lightened up a bit, slightly amused. 

Now that Scar thought about it, it was kind of silly sitting here, doing nothing. But he did not appreciate the lighthearted remark when he was hungry, frustrated, thirsty, boiling, and cursing at his body for making his life ten times more complicated. 

He simply sighed in reply, looking at the table instead of those black irises. Grian hummed and stood up.

“You hungry?”

Scar hummed. He wasn’t sure if he simply didn’t have the energy to form words or if the morning dryness in his throat clogged the words in it. He did cry, it might’ve contributed. He heard Grian rummaging in their food barrel. 

“What do you want?”

Scar did not reply. He was simply hungry. He would eat anything at this point. He was mostly thinking how to relieve this ache, this soreness in his muscles. It was slowly beginning to hurt and he did not want to deal with that. 

“I’m making applesauce, the apples are getting bad.”

Scar concentrated on the noises Grian made around the kitchen. The pots and pants clanking together, the harsh chopping noise, the swish sound the knife made against the peel, the bubbles of the boiling water, anything to distract him from the muscles spasms and the weight on his shoulder, the tension around his neck. 

He didn’t know how long he sat there, listening, picking at his nails, while Grian made them food. His head perked up when the bowl clanked against the table. Grian sat down and started eating, eyeing Scar. Scar tried to pick up the spoon, he really tried. His upper arm didn’t stop spasming, he couldn’t control his movement, so he kept his arm close to his side, letting it pass. He looked at the applesauce and just wished his body could fulfill its own needs without throwing a fit. 

Grian stood up, placed his chair next to Scar’s, and sat down with a big thunk, making Scar jump in surprise. Grian took his bowl and almost shoved the spoon in his mouth. He moved back, a grunt bubbling in his throat and his muscles whining at the sudden movement. Grian rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Scar, you need help and I am offering said help.”

Scar glared at the spoon in Grian’s hand, wishing all the deadly curses at it.  Grian huffed, frustrated.

“Sometimes you just need a break and there’s nothing wrong with that. Look, nobody is gonna come bother us if you don’t want to see people. Heck, I’m sure if I explained the situation to the others, they would totally understand.” Grian’s shoulders slumped, and Scar wondered if that’s how puppy eyes looked. “Please, Scar?”

Scar hesitated. He was hungry, but he really didn’t want Grian to actually be his servant. It was a fun concept, at first. He really hoped Grian was doing this out of the goodness of his heart. He cleared his throat.

“Not part of the debt,” he murmured, making sure to look deep into those obsidian eyes, even if they intimidated him. 

Grian blinked at him owlishly. “Of course not! You’re not well, let me help.”

Scar shifted his gaze to the bowl and nodded. Grian fed him, making sure he wouldn’t choke on the applesauce. It was quite good for smashed boiled apples. He could taste some of the sugarcane they started cultivating close to the edge of the roof of the mountain. It sweetened the aftertaste of the acidic flavor the apples left. Scar was quite impressed, and it did fill a hole in his stomach. 

After being satiated, Grian moved behind Scar, rolled up the sleeves of his red sweater and dug his thumbs on Scar’s lower neck. Scar winced and inhaled through his teeth, making Grian stutter in his movements.

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

The movement became gentler, rolling his thumbs against the tense part of Scar’s neck. It was quite relaxing, but a lingering pain made the gesture quite uncomfortable, as if someone was applying pressure to a fresh wound. Scar didn’t complain, though, he appreciated the physical touch and was glad to know Grian became comfortable enough with him to touch him like this. He hummed in pleasure when Grian’s thumbs massaged his shoulders and traveled against his biceps, feeling the tension loosen up. Grian let out a chuckle.

“Geez, Scar, are you stressed or something?”

Scar tensed, immediately thinking of his nightmare. The thumbs stopped circling his deltoid, and Grian’s long nose appeared in his peripheral vision. 

“What are you worried about?”

Scar sighed and looked up at the ceiling. One hand left his right shoulder while the other rounded his shoulder before squeezing it reassuringly. His gaze landed on wide obsidian eyes, on a slightly freckled nose that almost looked like a beak  without looking crooked, on rosy cheeks, on dark blond curls that frame a concerned face. Scar never realized how majestic Grian looked.

“Scar?” Grian inquired.

Scar put his hand on the one holding his shoulder, to touch where he was permitted to. 

“Pizza,” he let out. Grian quirked his eyebrow. “Had a nightmare about her death,” he confessed, closing his eyes and rubbing his thumb against Grian’s knuckles. 

“Oh, Scar.” A warmed hand wormed itself close to the base of his hair. He shuddered.

“I miss her, G.”

“I know.” The hand nested itself in his hair, bringing his head to Grian’s shoulder. He stuttered a breath.

“Why did they take her away, G? She didn’t do anything, she didn’t deserve that.”

Scar let out a sob, his body slack from relieving tension with his crying. Grian shushed him, playing with his hair, scrubbing his scalp. It felt amazing, even if the tension in his neck was back. He grabbed the hand that was playing with his hair, stood straighter on his seat, and brought the hand closer to his chest, letting the other that was holding Grian’s hand on his shoulder (it was slowly rubbing circles now—Scar couldn’t be more glad to receive physical touch) fall and grasp Grian’s thigh. 

Grian shushed him again, whispering “I know” over and over, reassuring Scar that Pizza was alive, that she probably got lost. He took his hand out of Scar’s grasp and brought it to his cheek, whipping the tears away as they came. He leaned in closer and Scar could smell the faint applesauce in his breath.

“I’m so proud of you, Scar,” Grian murmured, landing his forehead against Scar’s. Scar did a whole body shiver at the praise, not realizing his cheeks got warmer with the already warm room. Obsidian eyes locked on his, barely an inch between their faces. “Can I kiss you?”

It was so quiet, but it echoed in Scar’s ears. He slowly nodded, not knowing what to expect. Grian wiped dry his cheeks and leaned his lips slowly against Scar’s. When their lips met, Scar wasn’t sure how to respond, what he was supposed to do. Grian’s lips were warm, chapped by the dryness of the desert, and were pressing harder. In order to not lose balance, Scar pushed back and wondered what was the purpose of this action.

Grian pulled back and surveyed Scar’s face. He smiled, placed his hands on his hips and hair, and hugged Scar, face buried against his neck. Scar was taken by surprise and placed one hand on Grian’s waist, while the other rested on his shoulder blade, not sure how far or how close his hand should be to the wings. 

“We’ll find her, Scar. We’ll find her and prove to everyone to never mess with us, and that’s a promise.”

Scar sniffed and let out a choke sob, circling his arms around Grian’s waist and muffling his cries of joy in Grian’s sweater. Grian petted his hair once more and they stayed there in a long silence, sometimes interrupted by Scar’s sniffles and Grian’s reassurance and praise. 

-- Bloop anon

BLOOP

I am on the floor in a puddle of my own tears. THEY SO IN LOVE IT HURTS- but ykno..death games an all... WAAAAH IT WAS SO GOOD- YOU'RE WRITING IS SO *chefs kiss*

Uncharismatic Fact of the Day

What do hair, skin, nails, scales, horns, claws, hooves, and feathers have in common? They’re all made of keratin! Keratin is a fibrous protein produced by every vertebrate on earth. It is highly versatile, lending itself to a wide variety of uses; it can be hard, forming protective scales or sharp horns, or soft and flexible to make hair and feathers. In the latter example, this protein is incredibly unique, as no man-made substance can match it for insulation or generating lift.

(Image: close-up of scarlet macaw (Ara macao) feathers, by Ana Cotta)

Random Villain Recruiters Headcanons:

Hook knows how to cook. Pirate life dude. So she cooks a lot of the food for the recruiters with Apple, Joe, and Jack since they also cook

Pretty Scar can make a tail and a pair of ears appear at her will to connect with her and sometimes when the Recruiters find a lost child she would let them pet her ears to calm down

Both Malfie and Apple tend to care most about their appearance, so skin/hair/nail routines a norm, especially when their recruiter days are on one day of a year

Speaking of Halloween in Disney, the group tend to act like they won't care if they don't see each other but on the day before the big day when they meet up to know groups and schedules they all basically tackle hug each other screaming about how long it's been. Like Apple, who doesn't seem to the type to hug for more than three seconds, picks up the first one he sees and spins while giving a big tight hug.

A shipper version is Mr. V is so nice enough to allow the lovers to spend this day catching up on a date...or other things since I don't believe a lot of the Disney Villains would approve of relationships between their recruiters

They do go into their human forms when they're back with their villains or if another thing happens

I love the cute headcanons that the villains are basically parents/mentors to the recruiters but to me Captain Hook seems the most fatherly to his recruiter. I don't know why but he just gives me the vibe of dad energy when Lady Hook comes to mind. Like a supportive dad or dads if you want to count the crew who most likely helped raised her

Cruella would be kind of a sucky mother due to her crime against animals and Dalmatia being a dog, but she's learning for the sake of him and that she actually likes him

Sadly I think Frollo is kind of a father figure to Veil but not the best kind... Frollo seems the least reformable in the villain group but Veil talks so highly of him, so I sadly end up headcanoning that if Veil and Lady Hook ended up dating or if Frollo heard about Veil's fascination to the pirate he would spit some religious stuff which would be hypocritical to him since of what he had done. I by no means hit religion as bad, you can like and do whatever you want as long as you're not hurting yourself or others

Jack Heart and Lady Hook play cards together when they have break and get along, both are crazy for different reasons

They all know when Veil is sad if she's not humming or singing

Therefore singing to her cheers her up right away, even if you can't sing!

If they were doing a dance party/contest it's not really a lot but if you get to choose a partner to dance with then do step down since Farja and Malfie seem to have it down perfectly! They work so well together and tend to look like they're flying when they dance together, mixing each other's hometown and magic in their dances as well Close second always is Ms. Hades and Joe, both working so well together despite being so different like water and fire and some how the dancing turns to a tango of sorts

Since apparently Farja is a scarlet macaw (what a pretty bird) she loves pets

Also based on her true form she tends to mostly eat nuts and seeds so the shops have a special health like bar ready for her and Ms. Hades has one in her pocket always

Since "Ms" means someone who either was married once but not anymore or you're unsure if she is married or not, I have a headcanon Ms. Hades was like Meg and she was married but her lover abandoned her and Hades took pity on the girl, which explains why she's kind of a boss-ass-bitch

Jack and Dalmatia cuddle. Ship or not they straight up snuggle if one of them is cold as best friends do

Joe has a habit of chewing on pens if he's stressed

Farja has a hair stim where she runs her fingers through her hair, twirls her hair, etc. But if for some reason she can't do her hair she seeks other's heads and do it to them

101 Dalmatians take place in England so Dalmatia has a English accent that switches from Cockney and Posh depends on who he's speaking to

Sadly like other Disney workers they get hit on a lot and it's usually Joe or Apple who get it worst. But one time Joe saw a customer being too flirty to Farja and she's really uncomfortable he stepped in front of the customer and gave them the scariest look ever and kicked them out

Pretty Scar secretly has a good voice, just lacks confidence that she's good at anything

Apple gives his coat to those who need it no matter who it is or gender

Amazon: Monkey Island/Animal Sanctuary

I was starving by the time lunch was ready at 1:30pm - golden catfish with rice and peppers which was pretty tasty. After lunch I went for a little siesta for an hour and then regrouped with Rodrigo and the Puerto Rican family (minus the mother) and we took the boat out to spot some birds and dolphins. There were glimpses of dolphins but I was always too slow to get a good look at them, and when I did see one pop up it always looked grey - they get more pink the more active they are. There was a massive deerfly (dragonfly/horsefly type creature) that landed on papa’s leg and was smacked off him by Rodrigo! We arrived shortly after at Monkey Island, guess what was in store for us there? A little capuchin monkey was waiting at the dock for the boat to get close enough to where it could jump aboard and check for snacks. The family bought some guava fruit from the owners of the island and then some big hefty boys climbed down from the trees and climbed onto papa’s shoulder to sit there and eat their fruit. The girls also took turns holding the monkeys and feeding them fruit but they were quite big and intimidating so I didn’t want to have it climb on me. I wouldn’t have minded one of the smaller capuchins on my shoulder but they weren’t so friendly and kept a bit of a distance. There was also a tiny malnourished puppy on the island and it seemed like the monkeys tormented him. They’d run up when he back was turned and grab his legs, or smack his head, and then run away when he turned around. The boat driver was laughing and joined in with the torment, touching the dog’s back when he was looking at the monkey. The boat got a bit stuck on the island so the owners helped us push off back into the river and we continued down to San Juan de Huashalado village where we visited an animal rescue sanctuary. A young guide took us around to show us the parrots, macaw, sloths, matamata swamp turtle, caiman, and boa constrictor. He encouraged us to all hold the caiman and the sloth and pose for a photo. I did these and felt guilty about it but I could barely take any other photos as I was being completely eaten alive by mosquitos in this humid swampy area even though Rodrigo had bought me an emergency repellent packet from a small shop to try and stop them. We hopped back in the boat and I was glad for the breeze blowing the mosquitos away from me, we stopped at the pink dolphin viewing area again and the girls and papa went for a swim. I stayed in the boat not wanting to swim in this dirty water or get my clothes dirty since I didn’t have too many things remaining clean for this hot weather. Rodrigo set all of our minds at ease (at least it was after the swim) about the piranha-ridden water and told us about when he was 10 years old and had his nail chomped off by a piranha. The people on the other boat stopped there were detailing stories of river fish swimming inside people’s bodies and eating them from the inside out. I was glad I didn’t swim! This time of the day was better for the dolphins being active and I was able to see some that had a pink belly as they dived out of the water. On our way back to the camp, Rodrigo pointed out the markings on the trees where the water level had been about 2m higher in the rainy season a month prior. The water was getting much more shallow and our boat actually wasn’t able to make it all the way in so we stopped at another bank where the water was high enough to get us close enough to clamber out onto a bridge. I  took a shower and was feeling very refreshed for about 20 minutes before Rodrigo, the girls, and I headed out with our boots and flashlights into the humidity and darkness. We walked the same path as earlier and it was a totally different experience. We saw spiders, tarantulas, frogs, fireflies, and some birds asleep up in a tree – luckily no snakes! When we got back, a chicken and pineapple dish over rice with egg was waiting, there was also a picked over salad that I could take a few pieces of lettuce from, and an empty plate that had once offered up slices of pineapple.

Night walk: sleeping birds, tarantula

If eurovision contestants were birds

Ft. Eurovision 2021 top 5)

Damiano gives off either wren or Robin vibes

Barbara reminds me of a dove for no reason

Gjon is a Bluejay (or a fairywren) because I said so

Dadi Freyr is a rainbow macaw for obvious reasons

Katya is definitely a raven no explanation needed, it's obvious

you nailed it

there could be no better explanation

Most birds go about preening their chosen mates, would your boys do so as well?

A good many of them, yeah! Specially with human mates, hair and skin is so NOVEL to them!

Macaw- Gentle touches, mainly plays with hair

Lupo- Plays with hair, messes with their outfit, wiping smudges from their face

Falcon- Hair, petting soft parts of his mate. Scents them for sure

Jackal- Outright chooses outfits for them, helps do nails and makeup, helps do up their hair, also pets along their arms/thighs.

Jay- Might play a little with their hair.

Fox- Pets face, scritches scalp, brushes their hair for hours. Plays with fuzz if hair is buzzed, he's VERY tactile. And once he feels comfortable enough to touch he is touching always.

Crow- Similar to Fox, he will always want to touch. But he's also very anxious of having his gloves off. Compromises with scenting lots, rubbing his cheek to s/o's and nibbling a little. Helping with cloths and makeup.

Hound- Faceplants into hair. He's no help at all.

Vulture- Much preening, much grooming. He will use tongue... Will need a shower after lol

Hyena- Same as his brother. Much grooming and cleaning. At least he does so WITHOUT slobber! ... Most the time. Maybe a liiiittle nibble??

Robin- Will complain about his mate's appearance but not help.

Dingo- will try to help, and get distracted squishing soft spots on mate. Hehehehe... soft❤

(Adding a Record of Ragnarok Verse!)

Name: Melosa, but she prefers to just be called ‘Mel’. Age: Golden age is 30′s Born: June Death: 1950′s-1970′s Nationality: Brazilian Gender: Female Sexual Orientation: Demiromantic/demisexual/semisexual (Ace Spectrum.)

Personality: She’s defensive and nervous by nature; Mel is normally very suspicious of strangers to start due to some mixed reactions to her in the past. (Reactions from humans ranged from Adoration to wanting to pick her apart) While she recognizes it’s not all humans, after Death she’s even more wary of humans/human souls due to an unpleasant death. However she’ll warm up to most anybody - especially if they have something to eat! She eats a lot! She had to when she was alive to keep up the energy to keep flying; But now it’s mostly just habitual eating. She is very diligent with her job; regardless of Soul, Spirit, God or Deity and will happily deliver any sort of package or message that she can carry!!!! Positive Traits: Friendly, honest, open-minded, Loyal Negative Traits: Incredibly Stubborn, self-indulgent, nervous, and easily startled

Eye Color: Yellow/Green

Hair Color: Black

Height: 5'3  

Weight: 130 lbs (Without Wings) 155 lbs w/ wings (They are fairly heavy!)

Weapon of Choice: Wings & Talon like nails

Dominate Hand: Ambidextrous  

Likes: Flying. Animals. Doing impressions (She’s good at mimicking voices/vocal patterns) Food. Candy! Dancing.

Dislikes: Storms, thunder and lightning, flying at night (poor night vision) Being yelled at/being called clumsy.

Weaknesses:  Poor Night Vision. Fragile: Wings are susceptible to breaking if she crashes too hard. (Previously - High metabolism - She needed to eat often especially if she’s flying.)

Scars: Nothing notable

Tattoos/Piercings: Earlobes are gauged.

Powers: Wings. Similar in color to a vibrant macaw. Approximately twenty foot wingspan (10 ft per wing Approx) She is able to put them away - magically tuck them into her back so long as they are not broken or injured. This does cause her significant and chronic discomfort though so she prefers to not do this.

More aura memes that no one asked for

muses: the Sullivan family

liam & cara: ivory

lace, marble, china dishes, doves, paper, bones, vanilla shakes. your essence is ivory: you are a piece of history, sturdy and eternal. others believe you to be gentle; they don't see the pressure that is threatening to crack you. you seek control and organize your life into rows. you are the overseer. you are the porcelain. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of grey, noir, pearl, and ashen, who share the pressure you put on yourself. you are also drawn to the expressive rose and lilac, who will help you grow and learn that things will be okay even if they don't go right. however, you may struggle to get along with the indulgent personalities of sky and apricot who need too much stimulation and decadence.

declan: crimson

rose vines, blood, apples, velvet, sharp nails, galaxies, dripping jewelry. your essence is crimson: you are the strong, defiant and avoidant. you crave some sort of deviation; to walk in another's footsteps feels mundane, a waste of your time. you are possessive and never look back at the things you've lost or forgotten. you are the rebel. you are the one who will change the world. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of red, blush, garnet, and bronze, who share your impassioned existence. you are also drawn to the confident souls royal and gold, who will help you grow and show that not everyone seeks to break you. however, you may struggle to get along with the slow-acting personalities of navy and umber who never seem assertive about anything.

brooklyn: blue

blueberries, canals, gatorade, denim jackets, stationary, coastlines, bluebirds. your essence is blue: you are as deep as the seas, but sensitive to the slightest ripple. you attach meaning to your emotions; they guide you, but also blind you to how things truly are. you act misunderstood but shy away from telling anyone who you really are. you are the poet. you are the sorrower. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of sky, navy, mauve, and jade, who share your need for authenticity. you are also drawn to the self-actualizing green and orange, who will help you grow and open up during hardship. however, you may struggle to get along with the linear personalities of grey and red who seem overly focused on structure.

colleen: indigo

cold water, tile, masks, constellations, dyed fabric, macaw feathers, night sands. your essence is indigo: your emotional depth consumes all who dip their toes. you are sensitive but enigmatic; you project an air of mystery, and deep down are confident no one could ever solve yours. you are darkly romantic and mesmerizing. you are the mystique. you are the widow. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of periwinkle, mauve, royal, and navy, who share your quiet intuition. you are also drawn to the driven souls amaranth and garnet, who will help you grow and learn how to leave your mark on the world. however, you may struggle to get along with the uncommitted personalities of bronze and hickory who seem to lack true depth.

finnegan: yellow

daisies, road signs, bumblebees, lemon merengue, bicycles, polaroids, awnings. your essence is yellow: you are precise yet shy, putting band-aids on your cuts alone. you demand much of yourself; your self-expression feels tempered by a mold you're intended to fill. you seek an anchor to hold and keep your doubt at bay. you are the dutiful. you are the one who rises after you fall. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of cream, gold, honey, and chartreuse, who share your loyalty and compassion. you are also drawn to the sturdy red and brown, who will help you grow and learn to not question your own judgment. however, you may struggle to get along with the overly-involved personalities of pink and green who are unconscious of their own feelings.