It's over now, my lovely friend
I take back a lot of what I said, as I sift through everything. My mind has flowed with question and doubt, but now it's sorted out.
There are many other things I never said, and perhaps that's for the best. Now the wool is lifted from my eyes, I see with fresh perspective and there's no regret, for once.
You've slipped away now. I woke you already and as we left the underworld, I mistakenly looked back at you. Oh cruel coincidence, how you hamper my pursuit of certainty.
You did think of me, but didn't act and it's ok. You did leave clues, and that's fine. You were you, and we can all empathise with that.
If I doubt you ever existed, it's because it would be easier to resolve the loss. But I know you did, because my inspiration flowed.
So I read back my poems, and what do I find? A chronicle of pain. My own attempts to resist an almighty temptation are there. I feel proud; I did us both good stead.
Your subliminal messages flowed from my pen, so now they will flock into the wild.
I wonder if it's a curse and feel concern for myself. But I'm not afraid. Not yet at least.
And there it is: time. If you'd said, I'd have come. Fine, maybe it was denial and you would never have known. Lucky you.
You watched your love die and cursed your luck. I empathise. But you were also angry at her for leaving you. That's how I understand your fate, sweet angel.
But I was too at fault. My fear of stepping over the line we discussed in mythical terms prevented me from getting down to brass tacks. The taboo I should have broken, but didn't, walking as I do on eggshells. Perhaps there's one regret, that I might have brought you sweet release.
We could have played it all differently, but what it would have changed is now academic. You're no longer, I'm carrying on.
Ink would flow ad infinitum were I to let it, but what inspiration would pump heraldic messages of platonic love two years from now? I refuse point blank to purvey your memory if it would serve to cast you in any other light than the one you deserve, for being you.
You were so gentle and light, so humble and polite. Self-effacing, yes, but at heart as solid as a rock. Concessions, humility and understanding: you could do it all.
Next time we'll be butterflies and we can try again and do better still. It was a success; you did me right. I'll always remember you for that. And you know how my memory performs.
So slip now silken angel, for I fear you're gone for good. Let go now once and for all, please, for me. For all the world who will find love, just let go and forgive.
Above all forgive yourself, because you held on too long, you didn't release your tension and it lifted from a child her mother for a second time. That can't be easy and everyone will understand that it's hardest for you.
Just as your love would have suffered the most at watching you remain without her to comfort you, you have watched your joy and thought the same.
Next time we'll talk that through too. I'm sorry I missed some subtle hints, that we could have picked up and explored, because you had so much to say, all blocked up inside.
Your only friend was gone, and her friends seem to have been like mine. So I understand. There's so much that wasn't done, but it must rest now.
So slip away velvet vixen, your time has come. Embrace the ether, give yourself to entropy, ascend to your cloud and rest a while.
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Heyy bestie! Ik this isn’t a minghao ask but I just wanted to say… I loved your Dino imagine and I NEED a part 2 😫🙏 ❤️
first of all, thank you! i'm glad you loved it!
secondly, omg i forgot i put that! i didn’t think anyone would send an ask so i put it as a joke. please feel free to ask anything :)
honestly i intended for it to be only one part but since you asked, my brain already has some ideas so i’ll try my best to fulfill your wish!
[ 05:41 ]
"love?" a deep, husky voice groggily whispered into your ear. you tried to roll over unto your back but a muscular arm wrapped around your waist held you tightly back against a hard chest.
"hmm? it's too early chan, go back to sleep."
you felt chan mutter against your hair and you smiled.
it was the morning after your second anniversary and you could feel you lower region ache from the strenuous activities the two of you participated in last night. you had been a little to excited and chan being the whipped man that he was, complied with your every whim.
in all honesty, ever since your divorce from your ex-husband, you were hesitant to start dating again, especially when chan was too eager to "court" you, as he liked to call it.
however, you were more than glad that chan was willing to wait for you to be ready. he never pressured you to rush things, even if that meant he had to start from square one.
"chan look out!" you exclaimed right as chan was about to be shot down by the enemy in call of duty. he screeched as he ducked behind you, causing you to die in place of him.
you felt your eye twitch.
"lee chan! if you don't stop being a coward and hiding behind me every time you are about to be killed, i'll tell wonwoo to replace you as my gaming buddy."
chan immediately clung unto you like a baby, looking at you with puppy eyes and pouting at you.
"but y/n!" he whined, "you promised to protect me from anything!"
"that does not include video games, you small otter!"
you gently slapped his arm and attempted to remove his grip on your waist but he only wrapped his arms tighter around you.
you looked at him, a feeling of fondness washing over you as you saw how this adult-baby clung unto you almost 24/7. you would have thought that from your first meeting, that chan would be against any type of physical affection but he proved you wrong when he would constantly shower you with hugs and cuddles whenever he could.
you smiled as you remembered the beginning of your friendship with chan. back when you were still reluctant to accept any type of physical contact, let alone a confession from him. and yet, you were beginning to fall for him even if he was oblivious to it.
"chan, i want to say first and foremost, thank you for being so patient with me when you could have just left me to deal with my heartbreak by myself and find a significant other that isn't as broken as i am—"
"y/n, i'm going to ask you to be quiet for a moment." chan grabbed your hands, forcing you to stop blabbering as his warm fingers wrapped around your cold ones.
"but..." you traced off when you saw the stern look chan sent you.
"you are the most wonderful person i have ever had the pleasure to meet. yeah, you're right. i could have left you to alone and find someone who wasn't so persistent on being slow with things but the truth is, the moment we met, i fell for you. i couldn't stand the sight of someone so vulnerable crying by themselves so i decided to invite you over to my apartment because i wanted to be the one to comfort you. i wanted to be the one to hold you close to my chest as you cried to let out your negative feelings. i wanted to be the one you chose to live your life with. so never speak so bad of yourself, you provided me with a ray of hope in this cruel world and i want you to know that if it weren't for you, i'd probably be homeless right now."
by the time chan stopped speaking, your eyes were already brimmed with tears. your heart swelled at the words chan spoke. you couldn't believe you have been given a second chance at love. and with a wonderful man at that.
"thank you so much chan."
you leaned forward and pressed your lips against his in a chaste kiss.
"sometimes i wonder why you chose to wait for me, but i'm glad you haven't given up on me. chan, would you be willing to accept me as i am? are you willing to start a new chapter of my life with me?"
chan smiled warmly at you and replied, "y/n, no matter how much you have gone through or how much you'll continue to change as you grow older, i'll be willing to be there every step of the way."
tears ran down your face but you didn't care as you leaned forward once again and pressed your lips against chan's, your salty tears falling in between the kiss.
"y/n? why are you crying?" chan's groggy voice brought you back to reality.
you wiped your tears, surprised you started to cry at the memory.
"remember when i asked you to become a part of my life? not as my friend but as my lover?" you sniffled.
chan nuzzled into your neck as he hummed.
"i remember. that was our first kiss and i remember feeling so happy finally being able to be with the person who mattered most to me."
you giggled from his nose tickling you. however, there was something you wanted to ask him.
"don't you ever wonder what would have happened if we never met?"
chan grunted, "no."
"how come?"
chan let go of your waist and turned you around, the two of you finally looking at each other.
"because there's no need to dwell in what could have or could have not happened when i have finally found the happiness i have been looking for."
you couldn't help but to let a few stray tears fall, chan wiping each one away lovingly.
"in case i haven't told you already, i love you chan."
chan chuckled but nonetheless replied, "not today you haven't."
"meanie," you gently slapped his chest and started to turn around again when he pulled you forward and pressed your head against his chest.
"i love you too, y/n. today, tomorrow, and forever."
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