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antheiasvase · 11 months

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Andreil says the big L ;)

ALSO POSTED ON AO3!! (link below)

It's quiet. It's always quiet these days. So serene it's almost sickening, like an unfinished peach pit sinking slow to the bottom of his stomach.

He stares out of the rain soaked window, book dipping downwards in his lazy hands. His fingers itch for something to do, picking at the pages, flicking at his fraying sweater, teasing at the tags of his cushions.

He's restless, he knows. He's waiting. For something, anything. A declaration, a speech, a symphony. Just something. He's tired of the known. So used to spending his days in a haze, the clarity of his mind leaves him dizzy and desperate for anything to dull down his nerves.

His phone begins to ring, an annoying screeching sound playing the chorus of Lover, You Should've Come Over, in an awkward stilted way. He knows who it is, he remembers when they had painstakingly figured out how to program it, the phone clunky an awkward in his bandaged hands. Andrew had laughed then, a small huff, when he had excitedly called him, so pleased, like the cat who got the cream, when he had finally figured it out.

That was before all the travelling, the distance, the gap that felt unreachable between two souls which had once known each other so deeply but now could barely stand to speak a few words before descending swiftly into silence.

Despite knowing how this conversation would go, Andrew still reached out, still desperate to hear his voice, desperate for his laugh, desperate for the minute escape from the sickening quiet of his empty apartment, desperate for the comforting silence from his lover.

He couldn't do without it.

"Neil," He breathed when he picked up, clutching the phone in both hands.

He heard the hitched breath on the other line, before they spoke, "Andrew," He whispered, he sounded like he was hunched over the the phone. Andrew could imagine him, curled close, under his covers which were pulled over his crimson curls, providing a cocoon of privacy for their conversation.

"I've missed you," Neil said, he sounded quiet, oh so quiet. A whisper on the breeze of life.

"As you should," Andrew lightly teased, immediately regretting the words as they slipped, unprompted from his tongue, wishing he could swallow them back and replace them with something much sweeter, dripping, 'I missed you too,'s like syrup from his lips.

Syrup slow, and tense silence expanded and made herself comfortable following his comment.

Neil hesitated, but laughed softly, despite this Andrew could hear him swallow. Andrew wished he could see him, he could always read his expression, and understand, but over the phone, it was as if a brick wall had been built up slowly between the two, and despite his shattered bones and bruised knuckles, Andrew wasn't able to punch through the wall.

Andrew cleared his throat, "I do too. Miss you. That is," It sounded awkward and uncomfortable, and mentally Andrew berated himself.

"I know that," Neil said, this time, Andrew could detect some form of pleasure in his tone, pleased that Andrew missed him too, as if Andrew could not miss him. Andrew missed him in every moment apart, every breath he breathed that was not mingled with Neil's own exhaled sigh, every cigarette he smoked not lit by Neil's spare lighter, every exy game he couldn't look to Neil and smile triumphantly as Neil cheered at their win.

"You should," Andrew said, softly, his voice barely louder than a whisper. He heard Neil move slightly on the other side of the call, as if he flipped onto his back to stare at the ceiling.

"Yeah," Neil muttered back, and Andrew clenched his eyes shut, so tight spots danced like every memory he has ever had with Neil in his vision. They flitted through his brain like a slideshow, up until when Andrew left for the true adult life of taxes and jobs and the slide show slowed to split seconds, stolen at airports, mere hours in between practices, budget airlines, and clenched fists on arm rests.

"I-" Neil faltered, and sighed, "Never-mind,"

Andrew picked up where he left the tentative attempt at a conversation, "How was practice?" While he loathed exy, in its every inexcusable shape and form, it was safe. A blanket that Neil could cover himself with and talk about till even he tired from the topic.

He could feel Neil grin, "It was good, uh, the newer kids are still shy, surprisingly, a few stand out but most are quite secluded. It's just me and Robin left, from the old foxes you know, and we're keeping the team together quite splendidly, I think Robin is a little sad, considering the year is almost over for me, but Wymack told me that he's officially upgrading her to Team Captain next year. I thought it was obvious, but he said, considering Robin's character, he figured she'd prefer some official confirmation," Neil rambled.

"He would be right," Andrew interjected, he leaned onto the couch, arm resting on the back.

"I suppose," Neil said, "Either way, there's nothing really interesting going on here, preparing for the finals, and such."

"You prepared well?" Andrew asked, toying once again with a thread from his top.

"Somewhat, we'll see how it goes. It's not like I'll do anything with this degree so I'm not all too worried,"

"Been scouted yet?" Andrew said, he could feel the mood slip slightly in the call, but he bit his lip and waited for Neil's answer.

"A few offers, here and there," Neil said vaguely, "I'm going out to check out a potential team in the weekend. I'm not sure yet, but it might be it,"

Andrew felt a tightness begin to coil at the base of his ribs. He could already see how it would play out, Neil would move, far and far and farther away and soon the phone calls will dwindle to a text every two weeks.

"That's good," Andrew muttered, clenching his fist tightly around a poor defenceless cushion.

"Yes," Neil said, somewhat hesitantly, "It's good,"

Silence fell once again. As expected.

"Neil-" Andrew began to say.

"I have to go," Neil suddenly interrupted, "I just heard a crash from Robin's room," The phone call ended, abruptly and on time with the dread that poured out of every pore in Andrew's body.

⭐️

Saturday practices were the worst, Andrew determined as he trudged across the field, heading back to the locker rooms. He felt disgusting, sweaty and gross, the strikers had been eager to prove themselves, some rumours had been circulating about upcoming transfers in the next season and as it was already confirmed that one of their senior strikers was retiring, the subs were desperate to show that they were ready to take on the tasking position.

Andrew wished they had gone a little easier. He hadn't slept since Neil and his call, and he'd been too apprehensive to call back afterwards. His whole body felt muted, and slow, like a mound of rotting flesh piled on top of his cracking and badly taped together skeleton. He sighed. He did that a lot lately.

"Minyard," He heard their coach call out to him, "Join me in my office for a second," For a moment Andrew considered turning away and going to shower instead, but in a rare display of obedience he found himself walking towards their coach's office. She was a harsh woman, with an even harsher last name to fit the bill, Coach Sauvage, Neil had thought it hilarious when Andrew first told him, as he stumbled over the pronunciation. She was half French and tended to cuss her team out in the vicious language when they pissed her off with their idiocy.

Andrew stepped in, glad for the air-conditioning, it was boiling hot outside. She sat down at her desk, her hands folded neatly over one another, and she pointed her fierce look upon him.

"You may sit," She said gesturing to the plastic chair across her desk. Andrew sat and began unstrapping his protective gear and dropping it to the floor as she began to speak.

"As you know, Richie is retiring out this season, and the role will be filled with one of the strikers we have, however this will leave an empty place in our striker roster. I was more interested in having some new blood contracted, rather than transfer in a more experienced player. However, in this special case, I felt it was more important to speak with you first." She paused and stared at him.

Andrew stared back, thinking about the relieving shower he would have after this dull conversation was over. "How exactly does this pertain to me?" He asked, she seemed amused at his question.

"I'm thinking of contracting Neil Josten, an old teammate of yours from college." She said. Andrew sat up a tad straighter, his eyes slightly wide. He thought back to his conversation with Neil,

I'm going out to check out a potential team in the weekend. I'm not sure yet, but it might be it.

"I know you two had some sort of rivalry back in college, so I need to know if this will or won't mess up the climate in the team. So far you've adjusted well, and I was hoping we could keep you for a while longer. That's why I first wanted to make sure you were okay with this. I would like to remind you however, you should perceive this as more of a fore-warning as it is very unlikely, unless under some extreme circumstance, that my mind will be changed if you happen to make an argument as to why he should not join the team," She said.

"He's here?" Andrew said instead,

"He arrived a few hours ago to watch practice, as it is most likely he will be signed I wanted him to meet the team,"

Andrew stood, abandoning his gear and rushing out of the office, he heard some loud conversation coming from the locker rooms and headed that way, knowing that Neil would most likely be there.

He banged open the door, and there he was. He was standing by the benches, speaking with Richie the retiring striker.

"Josten," He said, he knew he stumbled over the word in his rush to get Neil to notice him. He felt a light flush rise to his ears.

"Andrew," Neil said, taking a few steps towards him. Andrew met him halfway, and in front of the eyes of his entire team he pulled Neil, his Neil, his Junkie, into a tight hug. Neil seemed to sigh into the contact, sagging into his arms, like a lax puppet on strings.

"I missed you, I missed you," Andrew mumbled into his hair, quiet as a church mouse, solemn as a hymn, sincere as a prayer.

"I know," Neil whisper back, one hand twisted into the nape of Andrew's neck, his blonde hair tugged so tight it almost burned, the other curled into the small of his back.

He heard someone drop something to the ground in the background, and he almost jumped back from Neil, instantly aware like a rush of sound, that the entire team had just witnessed that act of passion.

"So," Richie said, biting the inside of his cheek, "That just happened," Neil laughed uncomfortably, but didn't step too far away from Andrew.

"I supposed that's confirmation that you have no issue with Josten joining the team," Andrew heard Coach Sauvage comment from the doorway.

Neil hung his head in embarrassment, but Andrew could smiled, a small one, simple and discreet. Sauvage took a note in her clipboard and said, "All right you losers, clear out and rest up, I'll see you all back here on Monday," She tapped her pen against her clipboard in an air of finality and swiftly turned and left the locker rooms, leaving her bewildered teammates and a love struck couple behind.

When she left, Andrew tugged on Neils arm, "Let's go," He said. Neil nodded, and waved a quick goodbye to their teammates and they followed Sauvage's quick getaway.

Andrew dragged Neil to the car, and pressed him up against the cool metal, it was dark out, and quiet, but this time, it was just them and the moon and stars as their witness.

Andrew tipped his forehead against Neil's, and breathed, he could feel Neil's own exhales puffing against his lips, and he revelled in the mingled air he breathed in.

"Andrew," Neil said softly, lifting his hand up and twisting his fingers into the back of Andrew's hair.

"I know," Andrew muttered, not exactly sure what he knew, just that he knew that this moment was perfect, and belonged to them.

Neil huffed a laugh, and Andrew silenced it by pressing his lips against Neil's soft and gentle, cupping Neil's face in his palms, as he tried to express what he felt without words. Neil responded in kind, and he could feel him slightly grin against his lips. With that smile, Andrew felt the words, sizzle up, saccharine and sweet, resting just behind his teeth, and pushing through the slit of his lips. He leaned back just slightly, Neil attempting to chase his lips, before Andrew spoke.

"I love you," He whispered. Neil froze between his hands, his eyes wide and almost glassy.

"Yeah?" Neil said, his voice watery.

"Yeah," Andrew said, rubbing his thumb over Neil's cheek, covering his twisted circle scars with the shield of his thumb.

"I love you too," Neil said, blinking rapidly after he said it.

"I know," Andrew teased, and this time it felt right.

Neil laughed, and it filled the quiet night and Andrew held him close, his arms finally feeling full again.

Me while writing this ^

But jokes aside, I did write this with an impending deadline, a huge art history paper I have to hand in in 40 minuted, with only 90 of the 1500 words written. Well. I felt at the time this was more important. I'm probably going to eat those words in a few. BUT you know, when inspiration strikes, you must grasp it with both hands and get to work, because inspiration is not a frequent visitor. I might post this to ao3 when I finish my project ;) I hope this was enjoyable and nice to read. I KNOW it was kinda angsty at the start but I hope the end makes up for it :))))

LINK FOR AO3 :)))

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lssugaluv · 2 years

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“I missed you.”

( Kuroo x Female reader. )

This is my first fluff. There’s a quick make out sesh, touching, and lots of reassurance.

Long distance relationships. Reassurance. Fluff. Love. Cuddles.

Bear with me please! Lol. Btw, I love Kuroo . <3

Keep in mind that this is Kuroo at age 20* lol. College Kuroo.

You walk in to your small apartment that you’ve been living in since last year. Due to your college being 10 min away, you chose it was best to stay there. Sadly, you had to sacrifice your relationship with your soulmate Kuroo. His university is 3 hours away from yours. You were going to school to become a nurse while he was going to work on being a sports promoter. You both agreed to keep in contact as much as you can but respect when you guys couldn’t.

What hurt the most was that you wouldn’t be able to see him as much as you used too. You two were front neighbors back in high school. You guys will always be together including with Kenma. You guys knew this was beneficial for your futures and promised to get married as soon as you guys finished school.

Today was a difficult day for you. You sat on your couch staring at the blank tv screen. You failed a difficult science test. Even though you studied, you wished Kuroo was there to help you. He is very intelligent and both science and math were his strong subject. You were upset with yourself and was afraid to tell him. You didn’t want to be scolded by him. But you wanted the most was to be in his arms. You wanted him to tell you it was all okay while he gave you small kisses. All you wanted was your boyfriend physically there with you.

You check your phone only to see the wallpaper of you and Kuroo. It was Kuroo kissing the side of your forehead with a blushed face. You were smiling straight at the camera. There was no message from him, just an email from your professor. You were so over today, you decided to read that email for later. The time was 6:30 p.m. You decide to take a nice warm shower and get ready for bed. You weren’t in the mood to eat, to speak, and especially to go out and socialize.

You grab your oversized t-shirt pj dress that has small black cats all around it. You then decide to skip out a bra and grab black laced underwear. You leave your phone on your bed and head straight to the shower.

As you were showering, Kuroo opens your apartment door. You two gave each other copies of your apartment keys, so whenever you guys had the chance or missed each other, you guys will go see one another. As he walked in, he saw the empty apartment. “Y/n? Are you here?” He saw your bag and keys on your coffee table so he assumed you were home. He walked to your room and heard the shower. He figured you were hungry so decided to cook a small meal for the both of you.

He had a break from studies and school so decided to stay over with you for the weekend. He was tired of missing you and tired of the lack of communication. He decided it was time to visit his girl.

He cooked some chicken fried rice with a small salad on the side. He fixed the table for the both of you and waited on the couch for you.

As you exited the shower, you blowed dried your hair, added scented lotion, body spray and deodorant. You then put your hair in a small braid and finally exited the bathroom. As you entered your room, you smelled a faint smell of chicken. You were very confused and decided to walk to your living room.

As you walked, you saw your boyfriend. Your heart started to race of so much emotion you felt. You saw him laying on your couch talking a small nap. You then glanced to the table to see that he had cooked a meal for you two. You couldn’t help but feel small tears come out your eyes.

“Tets?” You say in a gentle voice. You walk over to him and he immediately stands up and met you halfway from your living room. He picked you up and gave you a swirl. “Hello beautiful. I missed you.” He says as he gave you a small peck on your cheek. You couldn’t help but giggle and also tell him that you missed him. “Let’s eat and then we can talk.” You guys eat, clean and decided to watch a movie in the living room.

You guys sat on your comfy couch and you tell him about your test. You told him how you struggled and how hard you thought you have studied. “I’m sorry a failed.” You say with a small pout. “I feel like I not only failed myself, but I failed you.” Kuroo grabs your cheek to have eye contact. “Baby, it’s okay. We can’t always guarantee to pass. It’s okay to fail. All you need to do is try again. It’s okay to commit mistakes.” You decide to sit on his lap, both of your legs on each side of him. You press your face in the crook of his neck as he was caressing your head with one hand and had his other around your waist. “It’s okay baby, I’m here now.” You look up at him and gave him a sweet kiss. “You don’t know how much I needed to hear you say this. I missed you Tets. I missed you so much.”

Using the hand that was caressing your head, he grabs your chin. He slowly pulls you forward without breaking eye contact. He locks lips with you as your arms go around his neck. Both of his arms go down to your lower back. You began to kiss him a bit desperately. You wanted your boyfriend. Not in a sexual way, but just wanted his presence. You finally had him there with you. This. This is what you needed. For some, a test is a test. But for you, it meant a lot. He was your best friend, your back bone, your strength, your headache. He was your everything. To have him here with you in this very moment was something special to you.

You slowly break away as you look at him and go back to hugging him. Your face back at the crook of his neck. You got to get his scent. That sweet scent he always had. “Baby. Baby look at me.” You go back to look at him and he puts his head on your shoulder. “I love you y/n. I’m sorry we can’t always talk, we can’t always be together, but know that I love you. I’m here for you for anything you need. If you need help studying, I can still help you. You’re no bother, you’re my priority.” You gently grab his face and give him one kiss on the fore head and the other on the lips.

“I love you Tetsu.” And you reach in for one more kiss. He gently smiles as he caresses your cheek with his thumb. Let’s go to bed princess.” He picks you up without breaking the position you were already in. You wrap you legs around his back and burry your face back into his neck. He gently lays you on one side of the bed and tucks you in. He then lays down next to you. “How long will you stay? Please don’t say you leave tomorrow morning.” He giggled and said, “I’m staying for 3 days. So we will be together till then.” He grabs your hand and kisses it. “Let’s rest and be ready for our day tomorrow.” You agree happily and scoot next to him. You lay your head on his chest as his arm freely goes to the low of your back. You put your right leg on his leg and couldn’t be anymore happier than this. He gives you one more kiss on your forehead and then kisses you one last time on the lips.

“Good night beautiful. I love you.”

Afterthought:

Sorry if it was all over the place but hope you guys enjoyed! I know long distance relationships are difficult. Especially when something is going on in one’s life. But nothing like cuddles and reassurance to help. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks <3

#kuroo fluff #kuroo tetsurou #haikyuu fluff #haikyu fanfiction #female #female reader #long distance boyfriend #college #studies #cuddles #fluff #kawaii #wattpad

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