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#lmao vader your anakin is showing
ensomniaa · 1 year
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Lowkey, Filoni is kinda annoying me the more I think about it lmao
I saw the interview where he’s talking about Luke and him not AcTuAlLy being knighted and I just - come on really?
And the whole thing where he breaks down the ot and pt as essentially being a story about father-son relationships and all Anakin needed was Qui-Gon as a father figure that’s why it’s duel of the fates and Luke and Vader and all that.. idk i just feel like there's too much self projecting going on
It never even fully crossed my mind to simply take away father-son relationship meanings from the movies. It was always about good vs evil, evil being something that’s within a person, concealed by negative emotions and characteristics, that one must try to control and overcome lest it controls you, because it’s right there in all of us, and basically the jedi showing us how it’s done, how to face your fears and your darkest parts and how to love healthily and stick to the light and good cause that’s what will prevail no matter how bad the situation may seem, and how miserable the dark side truly is, and all that jazz.
But it was always more than just about nuclear family type of stuff. It was so metaphysical and intricate and yet so simple at the same time.
I don’t know, but him explaining the meaning as that, downgrades it a little in my opinion and also misses the mark. I feel like he did too much flipping and spinning around to come to that conclusion, instead of just facing the meaning that’s right in front of him.
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mandalhoerian · 2 years
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Death Before Dishonor | 1
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Pairing: darth vader x reader, anakin skywalker x reader
Notes: fem!reader, mandalorian!reader, inquisitor!reader
Summary: You have become the young war hero Anakin Skywalker's right hand in his pursuit to reunite the galaxy in Emperor Palpatine's reign. It's the rumored aftermath of the war between dark and light, but you are a Mandalorian, Jedi and Sith don't mean anything to you, in fact, they are the same existence that led to the destruction of your planet a millennia ago. Their war is something you don't care to know about, you're aware you won't understand anyway, there is a lot you're told to keep your nose out of as just a soldier to obey commands.
One of those things is the distinction between Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker; you weren't told why they must be addressed as two separate beings. Who he is really and who he appears as to the HoloNet confuse you endlessly when they are the same in your mind: both look at you in secret mourning.
You can't afford to find out why.
Warning(s): the reader is fucking UNHINGED, like there's barely any fluff and plenty of dark stuff in there. mentions of death, violence, allusions to smut/sexual relationship. it's a vader/reader story and both of them are twisted. the bond between them is not funny haha its funny weird. ur kinda (!!!) emo yikes sorry abt that lmao but hey at least you have gaslight gatekeep girlbossed your way into inquisitorship, you also respect vader the same way markiplier respects lady dimitrescu, aka "its not a sexual thing its about power" . i love this dynamic hhh
Author's Note: this is like my first story/post on tumblr and the prologue got 60 notes, I'm so happy, thank you to all those who showed their support, honestly I did NOT expect it!
Please don't hesitate to send me any asks/submissions if you'd like to talk more, I would love to hear feedback and your thoughts! I hear there's something called "tag list" and everything, so if you'd like to be notified when dbd updates, please contact me! Happy reading!
Word Count: Over 10K im so fucking sorry
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prologue | 1
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You had fought by Lord Vader's side for as long as you can remember. It was the clearest memory you have in your life. Only through experience would someone come to know purpose is something this addicting, it really left nothing in a person unrelated to anything other than what it desired. And right now it desired to serve Vader until your last breath.
You didn't lurk in his shadow like a hidden tool to be used, no, but went out of your way to bare your teeth at any kind of threat he pointed his sizzling lightsaber at.
You slashed your way across the stars, blinded by the red bloody victories vibrating the ever-treacherous life in your veins, only to be satisfied with them in a span short as the blinding explosion of a supernova. Yet they seemed to be more addicting in the aftermath of a star storm, leaving an emptiness ravenous for more━━always hungry for more.
Even though being a prisoner of war has elevated you to stand with a strong warrior like no other as him, you believe it is an honor to be allowed not just a few steps behind him, but standing right by his side. Not everybody is strong enough to desire that position. Only the ones who don't owe anything to death itself would do what you do, and oh what an old friend of yours death is.
After Galactic Empire's foundation, the darksaber, the sign of the Manda'lor, has been cemented on your hand as the greatest mockery to your planet, crowning you as the one representing Manda'yaim, and keeping you as a hostage to ensure their loyalty. The Mandalorians may have been engaged in a never-ending civil war to bring the other party down for years, but they didn't take kindly to outsiders trying to bend the knee of another Mandalorian, even when it was their enemy. 
However, the outsider they sent to do the job was different. 
You remember Vader descending on your planet of desolation, to crush their necks into submission like a blackened god of war carved from soot-black diamond dissatisfied with his subjects; ardent, burning breaths branding the fear of oblivion on all of the clans. He was a mighty, volatile dragon.
You remembers the awe, the catharsis striking your heart like a bolt of thunder, that this creature of pure force and vigor is the true warrior you had been looking to fight for all your life. Most importantly, the honor.
You, despite your identity of a true Mandalorian, once upon a time might have been betraying that heart by keeping a dream of spring instead of wild flames of rebellion; you might have been having visions of a peaceful family tinkering in joy with laughter, with light━━however, those mirages were soon shattered by the ruthless claw of that black dragon the moment he set his eyes on you. The same dragon that clenched your respect and loyalty and in an iron grip, gave you the pain of having ambition and woke you up to the unnamed potential lying deep within you. The shapeless darkness swirling inside your guts like newborn worms turned into snakes, turned into basilisks, and snuffed out even the tiniest specks of hope and light you had for your clan. They didn't deserve your loyalty, they were nothing compared to the almighty strength he radiated like a whole galaxy burning away just like that.
And you happily knelt, instead of cowering in fear, you embraced the slithering, domineering dragon as the one who you wanted to serve, wore his mask as his Inquisitor and in the competition of being the best, stroke down every single Jetii he showed as a target. Your Mando'ade heritage gave you the best advantage of them all, and you fought not because you were told to serve the empire, but because you wanted to wage war under Vader's glory and honor your roots in your own way.
Now they sneered at your name, whispered traitor behind your back, yelled dar'manda at your face as they challenge you to duel after duel to take the darksaber back. They had turned their backs on you right after you were taken to Coruscant, and yet they saw the righteousness in themselves to smear your name in the dirt? 
Wear your anger as you gird on your armor, says Vader, and you do, you never forgive them, give them the fury of a thousand dying, screaming stars and continues to maul the galaxy for fugitive Jedi. Every time you succeed, you can feel Vader's respect growing ever so slowly, and that feels like a rare treasure every bounty hunter, pirate and scoundrel is after in the galaxy.
You may have been just a failure as a Mandalorian in the eyes of your clan leader Pre Vizsla, but you will bring no dishonor to Darth Vader.
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Inquisitorius was silently protesting you.
What a shocker.
The hidden part of you seeking for acceptance wanted so badly to get to the root of the problem and discard it entirely upon solving it; however, the current you who had bathed in the flames of your master's enlightenment desired to crush those who even dared to attempt disrespecting you —— and that dominant part was feeding off of the shadowy, putrid abomination of a thousand years old primeval suffering of the former, mutating the weakness into something monstrous.
Even though you had shed your skin like a snake and had become a completely different kind of reptile, it still hadn't changed what remained inside and it would never change the attitudes people were going to have towards whatever you liquified yourself to take the shape of. What more did they want from you?
It felt degrading to admit that you would be forever hurt over never being acknowledged, all you ever knew was shame over rejection and homesickness for something more after all. Having bled into your shadow, it was still haunting you to this day like an archaic curse.
Nobody would listen to your voice back at Concordia, you always felt like weak embers of a trampled campfire, barely able to lit yourself back on again with the help of an occasional gust of wind. The loneliness of an entire galaxy —— the empty blackness that laid between stars and planets would fall upon your shoulders, and you would feel as tongueless as The Force, ever-existent but never able to directly make yourself be heard.
Being entirely powerless against a society you were secretly a nonconformist in crumpled your already defeated heart, it was always hell under the sky for you on that Force-forsaken moon. Not only were you a muted oracle, but you had to witness your people perish at the hands of what you had constantly warned them about as well —— had to see your closest family's head roll off his shoulders with what he stubbornly refused to let go of.
Now seeing you were stuck in a cycle just frustrated you. The reality that you still got the same treatment like it was out of some dumb history repeating itself cliché from a holodrama stung you unexpectedly when you had first noticed it, but all it did at the moment was to pour hot oil on your anger. Especially when you finally had someone who accepted you for who you were and more, a person who you harbored unbreakable respect for and would follow to the ends of the galaxy with inexhaustible loyalty.
And some silly childish boycotting by power-hungry ex-Jedi was enough to tip the glass of your sanity and make you plan an entire massacre, just because they were a possible threat to you bringing honor to this man.
Vader looked like an obsidian statue with his unmoving black-cloaked figure standing right in front of the entire window wall, facing the black vastness outside, gazing at the planet engirdled by his hive-like fleet. The Emperor had ordered a siege, and as much as you majorly operated as an Inquisitor, you were also Vader's right hand, meaning your aid was consistently needed aside from Jedi hunting conquests. However, you couldn't even solve one single problem to give your full attention to the current case on your hand.
Your helmet under one arm, contempt-flushed girl that you were tried your darnedest to stop your teeth from loudly gritting as you voiced the unnecessary question as an affirmation of his already established rules. "We are still working on dealing with the holo-faker, my lord."
A couple of heartbeats long of time filled the silence in Vader's headquarters in the spaceship before he slightly turned his head around as if he wasn't sure he heard you correctly. "The holo-faker? He is supposed to be six feet under at this very moment. My orders were crystal clear. What is the meaning of this?"
You wanted to bury yourself in a hole at how his eyes narrowed at the irrelevancy - because he was right. Former golden politician of the previous Galactic Republic, the marvel woman of Naboo, Padmé Amidala, had kicked off the decision to close all the military bases the empire had on capital grounds, thereby triggering the emperor's impatience over silly power games. They were to stand their ground until further orders came from the imperial senate and block all trade and travel routes.
And you were talking to Vader about the holo-faker they were already done working with.
You weren't fretting over having had not obeyed him, but because of not having control over the other inquisitors even about getting the smallest job done —— it affected and delayed everything.
If you were hiding under the cooling steel of your mask, it would be easier to hide the exasperation you were trying to suppress in front of Vader —— even though he always seemed to be aware of what even you yourself didn't know were feeling, as if they were color-coded and were displayed with labels right in front of him waiting to be read aloud. Yet, you still tried to hide away the displeasing details you found would be gum under his heavy metallic boots, so that you could deal with them on your own and your lord wouldn't bother himself with them at all.
He was meant for the glory of the battlefield, the ashen scented blood-red victories waiting for him across the galaxy, Vader was made out of the infrangible amalgamation of sun-soaked gold and black Mandalorian iron —— he certainly was above the clownery happening in his ranks.
He turned to you suddenly. The little hairs on your neck stood on their end with a sudden, blinding flash of a spike in the Force, right after the realization dawned on him, he didn't need to hear from you what went down. Though an endless ocean of stars illuminated him from behind and reduced his form into a shadowy blur, you could easily tell his burning yellow eyes apart.
Shame cascaded down and you had to anchor your gaze down at your feet to remain stabilized. "My apologies, I shouldn't have dared to busy you with trivial matters such as this. I——"
You heard his loud footsteps slowly approaching, each sounding like pillars of concentrated iron thundering down on the ground belonging to a titan.
You didn't fear what his reaction to was going to be to your failure, an army of furies were batting their wings violently in your stomach at the very notion of disappointing him. "Forgive me for my ineptness, I should have done better."
His warning as he reached you felt too feathery for something meant to be alarming. "There is nothing to forgive. Raise your head."
Golden mist clouded your brain upon the close proximity, chilly air of the spaceship turning lukewarm on your skin like you had been resting in a sunbathed arbor for a while.
It was foolish to think this way about a man as lethal as him; bravery and fearlessness were two different things and you were sure you were neither of them.
Your heart betrayed you by humming sleekly whenever he was close and you sometimes wondered if it was because you had become as terrifying as of an abomination just like Vader —— perhaps both of you were tuned to a beastly kind of menace in your ways, who knew?
When you remained succumbed into silence, Vader put his non-mechanic fingers under your chin and raised your head to look you straight in your eyes. The rush of sparks spreading on the skin there shocked you slightly, flinching at the never-ending coyness that washed over you every single time something like this happened. "Never bow to me like that again. You aren't on the level of those incompetent fools."
Vader was nothing but a vengeful, flame-drowned dragon of darkness, extinguishing novas sprouting in the galaxy with void-dipped fingers tasting of sin —— yet, there was undeniable tenderness blossoming as asters and starflowers in his gaze, affection of a primeval being of colossal chaos trying to be so careful in his way of reaching out to not swallow up the subject of his deepest admirations.
It was directed at you and shook you to your core every single time.
You would drown in that bottomless well, not knowing what to call the waters, for never had anybody ever looked at you that way before, you didn't know anything like it, as if you didn't have red on your armor —— as if you were an entity created to be loved and loved only; a starseed of the universe, darling, beloved, dearest.
Like all things truly evil, born from pure star-white innocence.
"I won't idly stand by when petty attempts of competition are slackening my troops." Vader sighed, anger creeping back on his spine as he pulled his hands away from your skin, eyebrows pulled together in contempt.
His inquisitor found the decision unwise, not wanting him to exert himself with idle subjects, for he was a Lord of the Sith. "Lord Vader, you do not need to waste precious time with getting involved in this, you are above that. Leave this to me."
Something in the sentence ticked him off, and you knew very well that Vader never held back when he found disrespect directed at him, but you didn't understand whatever you could have said that upset him this much.
"Very well, then," he said, turning his body back at the glass wall, and both of them stared in silence at the horrid portrait of Naboo, resembling a dead animal surrounded by hungry wasps.
He didn't dismiss you, and he explained the reason why soon enough. "However, it seems that order needs to be brought to my chain of command. You know what you have to do."
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Sometimes you couldn't explain some of your own behavior in a way that made sense. Like while sleeping, you always seemed to curl into yourself like an animal would preserve body heat, always clutching your abdomen to yourself instinctively. Acute longing for something so delicate would seep into the hard ice surface of your stinking rotten soul; sad, sad, endlessly melancholic for an unknown loss.
You mused it was for all the things you never had and what they turned you into; the regret it stank with. But that was not it. Your arms would itch to hold, your heart would expand like you had been a saint all along, but as the dawn brought the deepest darkness along with the cold, you would cast those pitiful vulnerabilities down to the hell of your sins and emerge as the newly appointed Supreme Inquisitor.
A durasteel fist of the Galactic Empire never wept, so you turned to scorching hot anger and let the flames evaporate them, relishing in the burning pain bringing sense into you.
Pain was the most uncomplicated emotion of them all, such primitiveness and simplicity eliminating anything that tried to get close, so you only allowed it to be a part of herself. There was no going back anymore. You had already made your choice and it was to fight for Darth Vader, rejecting your entire Mando identity and embracing being a dar'manda —— a state of not being Mandalorian; not an outsider, but one who had lost your heritage, and so your identity and your soul, regarded with absolute dread by most traditional-minded Mando'ade.
You were a Mando'ad no more. To your people, you had no soul. Perhaps that was true, you had sold your soul to the dark dragon to gain power, yet you were still holding onto the darksaber which belonged to your people to spite them all, trapping the souls unfortunate Jedi and traitors to the empire in the pitch-black blade —— unconsciously trying to fill the void where your soul once shone like a lone star with them, but none of them fit. None of them ever would.
It only ever felt mended when you had him. When he had you.
All locked within those moments of heavy hot air, damp breaths, sparks popping on lips stained with burgundy and sin-heavy with unsheathed words, freezing dew clinging at the back of two intertwined bodies, earthquake tremors running down your limbs as you yearned and ached. Furnace hearts pumped lava into the cracks webbing your skins, purified black eyes with the universe captured in them clashed in the dark with a sky blue like it has never met one before —— like two suns crashing into each other and burning everything, melt any darkness, painting you with molten silver and gold so that in their journey the touch would sing and chime with murmurs of starlight.
It is the only light you know, the only light you have ever felt, all of them coming from a darkling; steely pristine skin that crackles with electricity when you touch, a lion's mane for hair and merciless pools of inflamed despair for eyes surrounded by tired black and purple —— an ugly fireborn dragon wearing a celestial's face.
Endlessly pained for something you can't look directly at.
It taught you that fire does not only burn, but it is also a source of light as well.
However, that last part was only for you, who (foolish, one might think) had never feared the flames and pain, who didn't hesitate to soar in the skies, aiming for the sun itself with wings made of feathers and wax, you persisted. And not even once did you feel anything other than admiration, respect and desire to be close for him.
Your eyes are not their former color anymore anymore, you knew, they are as sulfur as his, as if to reflect him somehow, to reach him —— yes, to catch up to him, you didn't want to lose that feeling of destiny, the immeasurable amount of raw strength pouring into your soul through the unexplainable yet tangible bond connecting you to Vader.
You couldn't name it, maybe it was delusional and drunken of you to feel like you were dipped in a novastorm whenever you fought back to back, ever the addictive sensation, but that thing enveloping you in a blanket of apricity and curiously, home, would make the unshaped words hanging about meaningless in the end.
It didn't need to be said out loud, monsters of the same kind would stay with each other nonetheless —— and you were delighted, it was serendipity that he found you, even his acceptance was more than enough.
So you got up, as long as you were needed by him, you would always get up, no matter how deep you had fallen.
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Standing around a giant bulky holotable, three inquisitors of different races and genders had their blank eyes on the three-dimensional map of Naboo in front of them, having just been informed by an imperial attendant of the latest news. The silence fallen upon them was swallowed up by the near bustling stormtroopers and anxious military officers attending to their duties, going around the main bridge of the unmoving Star Destroyer one hundred kilometers outside of the planet.
First Brother, a well-groomed Miralian male with shimmery pink skin and diamond-shaped light purple tattoos scattered around his nose area, was the first one to shake off his speechlessness. The luminous blue of the hologram map glinted in his eyes, reflecting a welcome surprise. "The Supreme Inquisitor. Huh."
Third Sister retaliated, the iciness of all the metal surrounding them had seeped into her limbs, she stood motionless but her anger was an alarming red. "I can't believe this."
Eleventh Brother was playful, the shade of the hologram painting his mischief-holding yellow eyes blue like his skin. He was bulkier than the other two, however, the way he spread his palms on the edge of the table and put his weight on them and leaning over made him look smaller than he was. "How well do you think she screwed Vader to swoop the rank from him like hair out the butter? The man must have been to the neighboring galaxy and back."
The female inquisitor's frustration was dripping into the Force. "He is thoroughly blinded. I can't believe it. The Emperor must know about this."
The Miralian, however, was annoyed and uncomfortable in his own skin, imagining a thousand eyeballs materializing above their heads directing their unblinking gazes at them. It was a touchy subject. They were treading on thin ice by talking about it in an open space like this, he knew very well of the infamous temper of Vader when he even felt like his decisions were being questioned. "You metalhead, of course he already knows about everything. Who do you think Darth Vader is?"
The Pantoran tilted his head comically to agree with him, while the sister crossed her arms, taking a more defensive stance. It had fueled her forward, not even close to stopping her. Third Brother had to press on. "You're also forgetting who she is."
Her fingers were twitching slightly. "She charmed you as well."
"Charmed?" His voice got unconsciously higher and he heard Eleventh Brother taking in a long, exhausted breath, this was quickly turning into a heated conversation. "All the girl does is completing the missions she is given. Why are you so agitated?"
Third Sister suddenly opened her arms wide. The respect for Supreme Inquisitor obviously ticked her in the wrong way. "Because she gets undeserved favoritism!"
"I just told you why it's not undeserved. You're really letting your reason fly away like that?"
Eleventh Brother, then, physically came between them at the disdainful non-verbal mention of dark side, eyeing the officers slowing down to take a look at them now fully shouting at each other. "Come on, don't get heated up both of you." A lazy smile spread over his face. "Let's agree to shag Skywalker and get ourselves some well-deserved vacation, huh?"
But it did nothing to calm Third Brother's nerves, he wasn't overly relaxed like the other guy. "Ssshhhhh! Do not address him like that! You're going to get blasted in the head."
"I don't think he's that strong in the Force to pick up whatever comes out of people's mouths. At least not yet anyway," was his response. The Miralian knew he was doing his best to lighten up the mood so this didn't end up as a mistake getting one of them in trouble in the end, but calling Vader by that name anywhere, even in secret, meant a direct death sentence, it wasn't something to be joked about.
"It's Lord Vader to us, be careful."
"Relax, I'm not that dumb." The sudden emotion showing itself towards the end and curtaining over his face shocked the other inquisitors. "It's just. . . I find it hard to get used to. He was someone else before, you know?"
They were all flashing back to the same day, who the most called Great Jedi Purge. The silent Third Sister had been the one to speak first, after a while of solemn quietude. "New meditation techniques not working for you?"
"Not in the slightest. If he found out I am behind on this, Vader would chop off my left hand as well. . ."
"That is meant to teach you loss and pain, it's not a punishment," Third Brother intercepted, ignoring the slight humor his fellow inquisitor was using to mask his weakness. He was a guy that followed orders, and it was very pristine to the eye. Dark Side hadn't been able to purge that out of him.
"I think we've experienced enough loss and pain, don't you think?" It was a throaty murmur that came from Eleventh Brother. "The absence of a limb means nothing."
When a surge in the Force came the Miralian's way, it was too late for him to stop Third Sister from continuing to ramble on. "Speaking of which, did our Supreme get any of her limbs cut away?"
"Oh for the love of —— drop it."
"No, listen. This is not fair."
"It's about individual progress, you can't put her and yourself in the same equation, it doesn't work like that," he whispered, getting hurried and irked with each word mainly out of fear. The holomap was already forgotten. They looked suspicious, huddled up together like that. "We were Jedi, it's hard for us to leave the old ways behind. She only has been exposed to the dark side. It's natural that her advancement is different."
It was logic. Though it penetrated her ears, the meaning never reached her completely. "The way she fights —— I can't wrap my head around it."
Her eyes moved left and right, erratic as she remembered, countless battles coming one after the other, lining up in her head. Each one of them focusing on one pair, always together, never going the opposite way in a clash. Moving in complete harmony and sync, reminiscing one superior mind controlling two separate bodies. "She completely parallels Vader, it's like they are parts of the same machine and I think I'm going crazy sometimes when I think about it."
One hand was holding onto her elbow tightly, the other hand moved up and down, vertical to the ground, to emphasize her words. "There's no way she could have picked up on the technique that fast without getting special treatment is what I'm getting at. It's the main thing that infuriates me."
"Is it?"
"What are you suggesting?"
"It is because she became more masterful in a matter of months isn't it?" First Brother said, not holding back in the slightest, calling her out on it. The way her chin moved in a circle with a completely closed mouth gave her away. "Her achieving that level of skill and leaving the rest of us behind pisses you off because you're envious of that power. It's the greed talking, not you."
"But you can't say that I'm wrong," she shook her head, raising her eyebrow with a smile like she was proud of a secret. "The Al'Verde, Unifier of Mandalore or whatever the kriff her other titles are, I don't care. She can't be capable of this much."
In the corner of his eye, First Brother saw the burly Pantoran getting very shifty on his feet, a sign of anxiety from him.
Then he noticed why, as the sign hit him too, a chip in the force, like a faraway warning.
Third Sister was getting too vexed to notice it as she didn't stop talking for one second, and Third Brother was lost in the moment once again. "She's meant to be a pawn to the empire, a hostage, because all those helmetheads only seem to get smart when it's about war. The idiot had it coming for getting involved with the Rebellion. Everybody knows this, yet we still have to pretend."
She was talking about how Mandalore was forced to make a treaty with the Galactic Empire. This event, even though it led to her eventual arrest and recruitment into the military, had made way to Imperial Initiative in which the newly started empire went on a treaty spree to collect all the Separatist, Neutral and rogue planets without violence. This was of course a plot to force the planets into peace, but it was still effective.
"Now, compare that to me, do you get the picture? I deserve to be in a superior higher-up position, don't you think?" Third Sister almost commanded, the corners of her eyes crinkled, eventually turning into a full-on glare. "Even if we leave this all aside, she doesn't even know how to use the Force that much and here she is, the great Supreme of Inquisitorius. This is not fair."
"It doesn't matter. Do you want me to flash the headline on HoloNet or something?" Frustrated, he raked his fingers through his hair. "The number of successes you bring to the empire decides your worth. Last time I checked, Mandos were on a different tier considering the warmongering past."
"So? That doesn't prove that she isn't privileged."
"Maybe because being a political figure requires the empire to make her look good." Once again, Eleventh Brother tried to sweeten both of the worked up Inquisitors. He thrust his fists into the air in a caricaturish, slow victorious manner.
Third Brother wanted this conversation to be over, the unrest pooling in his stomach was too alarming to be ignored. "It's because she's better at our job than you are. Face it. There is nothing else to it."
Third Sister's arms, untangled from their lock earlier, now dangled down her sides. She gave a bitter laugh. "It's not exactly encouraging motivation-wise when you feel like you're disposable."
Eleventh Brother snorted, his usual mocking still there, but now molded with irony. "I thought you already knew we are expendable to the empire."
But the person who responded wasn't either one of the three. "You are."
They didn't even feel her coming, gliding up to them from the shadows. And suddenly, the famous darksaber was peeking out from just beside Third Sister's neck, the inquisitor's face contorted in raw shock before she dropped to the ground, trembling and clutching the raw burn. It was the loud sound of her hitting metal that made the other two scramble back in panic, their hands hanging afloat.
"Stars!" was the only thing coming out of the Miralian before he had literally jumped out of his skin, the Force hadn't even poked one of them, not a last-second warning at all too. Third Sister was about to be executed just like that.
Inside of his skull was white. Void of any thoughts. Nothing came to mind. Third Sister literally laid violently trembling at their feet.
Supreme Inquisitor's force signature slammed on their faces much later, like the heel of a foot descending on a bug, the faint crunching sound got to him in his imagination and he looked at Third Sister once again, sprawled out on the floor. He felt an entire wall of frosty fury pressing down on his body, and not even a smudge of remorse was there for almost taking a life.
Eleventh Brother was just as horrified, his cowering stature resembling a frightened child's, which was ironic because the woman in front of them, standing silent and mute while waves of danger rolled intensely out of her through the Force, was much smaller compared to his species.
The Pantoran and he held eye contact for a fleeting second. The former's face held a fear of death while Third Brother was still thinking about the current overwhelming presence being entirely missed by all three of them, how long had she been listening to them for?
Her T-shaped eye lenses, contrasting with the black of the mask she had on was hiding her expression; but the almost glowing red, accompanied by the white glow darksaber flared, was more terrifying than any emotion her face could contort into. "Get up."
Third sister stammered, none of her previous vigor present. "What?"
"Get up. I see you have complaints, I want you to walk me through them."
First Brother had to do something. "Supreme Inquisitor, please overlook her childishness just this once - "
"I am not talking to you." The blood red lens of her helmet stayed focused on her target. "Sister. Take out your lightsaber and feel free to test my skills to your liking. But know this. If you do, I will treat you like as you'd like me to, and we will go at it until the end. You know our ways."
Stuck right where she was lying on the floor, her eyes momentarily met First Brother's, who mouthed, "Don't," at her behind clenched teeth without any sound.
She ended up saying, "Forgive me." The haunted look in her eyes was avoiding directly coming to contact with the Mandalorian woman. Upon the crackling silence that followed, Third Sister tried again, higher-pitched and a slight panting in her breath. "Please forgive my impudence."
"Anyone else that wants to question my credibility further?" was what Supreme Inquisitor asked, not a declaration of Third Sister's death sentence, thankfully. When she was met with silence, she turned off the darksaber, yet didn't put it away. "Anyone else that wants to stay and gossip instead of doing their jobs?" 
Silence. 
"Anyone else that volunteers to do as they were ordered and get rid of the holo-faker?"
Third Brother and Eleventh Brother stood straight. "We will get to it," the Miralian said shakily.
"You better."
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A bottomless pit of abiding nothingness was expected to be cold, but sometimes you would think it could be a bit warmer because of the stars it was pregnant to burned with all their might.
Myriads of stars and suns, withering away and blossoming at the same second were furious in their hearts beat to the rhythm held the balance together, yet the universe remained colder than beskar still.
It was proof no star could ever be enough to warm up their home, not even the supremest of them all. And perhaps in their sorrow, they all ended up as black holes, swallowing up anything in their way to fill the hole where their burning souls once stood brightly as the hearth for the planets under their wings. 
But you could never be cold. Not when even the spaceships were perpetually freezing. Your fire sang too vigorous for that. There was a furnace akin to a star at its prime nuzzled inside your ribs constantly keeping your palms unusually warm, especially when you were sent to planets with chilling climates for a mission. Your peculiarly high temperature made so you uncomfortable sometimes that you wore so little while physically training. It was unnerving for those under you that you could withstand icy environments so easily. Some even thought you were half-robot as Lord Vader and couldn't even feel physical contact anymore.
No, you experienced pain on a different reality than others did. You were sure Vader did as well, it was your fuel to the Dark Side. So much so that it was addicting at times to inflict it to other people and yourselves. You fed on it as if you were one of the Anzati preying on the life source of others to survive. It was necessary. It was vital. One could never get used to pain, but to accept it as a fundamental part of the path to the dark side had done the trick for you.
That's why you could understand why Lord Vader bit back complaints about his steel arms and legs never seeming to fit and holding him back from his full potential. They hurt him immensely,  although his face in plain sight didn't even wince you could feel it; his yellow eyes didn't sour over with pain yet nevertheless, you felt it in your own body - even when he kept it from pouring into The Force itself, you felt it as if you were being hurt.
But while you didn't know what to do with it, Vader used that agony, he internalized it and brought forth an entirely different kind of might that terrified down to the bone whoever dared to cross him. 
Vader always knew what to do.
But you couldn't bring yourself to tell him the things you had heard the last day. Rebellion was ringing in her ears wherever she went and whatever she did. Mand'alor.
Among other insults hurled at her, nothing had bothered her as much as nobody disagreeing with the late Third Sister. All the briefings, all the reports, all the patrols during this past couple of days were all spent on thinking about what in the hell they were talking about. You were none of the things Third Sister had claimed her to be.
You were the last remaining kin of Pre Vizsla he had adopted into the clan, wasting away in your atelier with your stupid idea of reconciling with the current government of Mandalore, daydreaming about it while fixing weapons and armor. The girl who had never been able to become a full-fledged Mandalorian smelled of oil, dust, metal, shadows, and underground, she was too weak to even talk back to her blood. She wanted to run and fly but was chained to a dustball of a rotting planet moon. She was nothing before Lord Vader had found her. 
However, you couldn't forget about it. It was constantly in your head, like a damned bug crawling through the curves of your brain and scratching away at the flesh walls of the organ, it kept slamming its way right in front of your skull, pounding in her temples as a persistent headache.
Why did they call me that? Why did they say that?
Was it sarcasm? No, it couldn't have been.
It was scary how obsessed you had become with a tiny minute detail when it meant nothing at all. You had sat down and thought about what you were expecting but there wasn't anything you could grasp at. You just couldn't get it out of your mind and that was it.
So you trained. For hours and hours a day, you practiced and meditated. There was nothing else to do. You were ordered to lay low and wait at Naboo's door, no one could go anywhere, so you did the best with what you had.
There was only so much you could do in the limited area of the training ground they were spared in the main spaceship. The floating metal monsters were made for combative military purposes and not military drill ships used for education and field practice after all. If they were informed of a blockade of this kind beforehand, the preparations would be more suitable for their situation.
Therefore you ended up requiring a partner to work with, granted that training equipment was not present.
A partner, being the partner, who had always been the only opponent you had sparred against, Darth Vader of course. 
Maybe you couldn't tell him what had you fearfully hypnotized for so long, but you could use him as an anchor to clear your thoughts and achieve lucidity that way. Vader was an in-and-out kind of one-man army with no distractions whatsoever and that had inspired you in your own way of handling work. Not only did straightforwardness find a new meaning in him, but you felt closer to clarity by his side as well, it gave you a refined sense of strength.
When you came together blade-to-blade instead of back-to-back, you and Vader were identical if not paralleled, one the hands and the other the legs of the same body, you were like the complementary halves of a single warrior. Vader, due to his overly bulky cybernetic limbs, moved with the power of roaring ocean waterfalls, he was unstoppable; meanwhile, you were the shadow and the wind, the sacrificed speed and mobility completing him in a different body - you appeared out of nowhere, struck, and disappeared.
Despite having the chance to spar with Vader himself after a long time spent with deeds for the empire, you didn't manage to clean her mind off the noises repeating over and over again right in the middle of your nervous system. It was reflecting on your motor and reflective abilities, you couldn't keep up with him today.
"You came here to clear your head but your mind is still distracting you," was Vader's eventual response after wiping the lusterless steel floor with your backside for the nth time.
You always got up whenever you fell, having a feline's agility and swiftness akin to lightspeed but he was not having any of it this time, it was obvious from the dismissive frown distorting his youthful face. The red glow of his lightsaber was gone in an instant.
Calling your own lightsaber back, you didn't have any difficulty in extending the Force as a limb to retrieve it whenever it had flown off to. As soon as the hilt caressed the skin of your palm, your fingers closed down on it as if you wanted the crush the useless thoughts plaguing you.
Darksaber's idiosyncratic sound was higher pitched than any other used by the Jedi and the Sith, but it had the peculiar ability to respond to its wielder's emotional state. You had noticed the erratic electrical effect pulsating like a heightened heartbeat, but you didn't want to stop due to accumulated frustration. If you were indeed a machine, there would be smoke surrounding your burning limbs from clashing with the cold atmosphere. "I can keep going."
There was no way Vader was not aware of the emotional storm raging inside of you, he even sank his hook into the tiniest of specks you went out of your way to hide, yet he was calmly observing at where he stood. "I'm not enjoying myself anymore, this is pointless. So how about you tell me what's been bothering you instead?"
Of course he goes for that, you sighed. Always straight to the point. You couldn't confront the root of her problem at hand, you didn't even know what was bothering you this much. It was obviously speculation on their part of something. The whole Inquisitorius may have been informed that way to help you assert your superiority, but you still couldn't bring yourself to at least investigate it.
You had forgotten this part of you existed at all. It had been buried deep down the seven circles of your soul where even the Force itself couldn't shed light upon it. Your weaknesses: hesitation, coyness, pudency, dastardness - your old needy self who was always pushed into the shadows. Remnants. They deserved to rot in darkness; crumble away until they were nothing but ash and dust under your feet. The old you of Clan Vizsla, who would tremble and scream and grieve in terror if she ever knew the person she would become was the infamous tyrannical Supreme Inquisitor, needed to die.
A warm campfire singing with the dancing fireflies wouldn't stand a chance against a devourer wildfire raging against the night; it just didn't work that way. You needed to kill it.
Your head twitched up when the darksaber turned off by itself. You felt Lord Vader's extended power return back to his shadow after lingering for a little while, thinning the oxygen around her by its mere presence. "You know I'm not one to waste my time."
"Too much waiting," you blurted out when it became evident if you were to stay silent, he would try to pry into your mind, he kept staring at you without moving a muscle - like he was one of the unsettling ginormous milky alabaster statues standing tall in front of the Imperial Senate Building.
Vader rarely ever did disturb the privacy of your inner world, he didn't need to, he just knew you like the inside of his palm, and you never hid anything from him either, you trusted him more than you trusted yourself.
Your obstinacy tended to keep things away from him whenever failure stamped itself right on your forehead - because you were ashamed.
But this was different. You could tell Vader had noticed as well.
You were simply very tired, the black spandex of your training wear was sticking to your skin because of the sweat and the braid you always kept long to wrap around into a circle at the back of your head so it could fit inside your helmet was a messy bird's nest. You couldn't find the strength in yourself to weave an intricate web of lies to keep Vader away from your worries, so you opted to only reveal some of the truth as you took a few steps back to wipe your forehead and the back of your neck with the towels neatly folded and laid right beside a variety of weapons ranging from target blasters to melee weapons such as techblasters.
Later on, as two black silky cloaked-figures stormed through the deck like flowing gravity-driven drops of ink to get to Vader's quarters, tearing seas of white armor and black uniforms apart as they glided along in sync, you finally voiced some of your worries but not the entire truth. Your mask caused your voice to sound artificial and monotonous enough to hide the intent behind. "Why is Naboo special? There were other planets to try the boundaries just like this before. What are we doing here?"
The man's booming steps didn't falter, he kept on power walking as he usually did. The only giveaway to his surprise was his golden gaze immediately getting drawn to your frame. "That's unusually curious of you."
"I suppose it is."
Corridors of the metal maze they were in curled in different directions as you talked, occasionally wrought with artificial white, red and blue lights blinked and streamed past you in streaks. It was all in the background, as you were only awaiting Vader's response. "The Emperor has not said anything yet. We are to stand our ground."
He was tight-lipped when it came to The Emperor. Tenuous shadows obscuring his reflection in The Force, meticulous and ten times more intimidating.
Beings with no force-sensitivity perceived it as Vader holding their necks tight in a noose, or perhaps an unsteady sword floating right above their heads. He was at his most merciless when he was escorted by The Emperor's words. It was hard for even you to speak your mind freely, not because of the fear, but because deep in your soul, you sensed a fresh, gaping wound, and it had The Emperor's handprint next to it.  
Not lingering on it, you uttered your evergrowing uneasiness snowballed with the word Rebellion about the task given to them. "Lord Vader, this looks like a false cover-up for an intended invasion to me. Why else would we be here?" Your job didn't end with supervising the Inquisitorius as Darth Vader's right hand, you also participated in keeping the order in the empire. Those required having to always keep moving and never stopping in one place for too long. Even Vader couldn't stay at his castle in Mustafar to rest for more than days between the duties. The wait for something from Naboo had been unnervingly delayed. It had rightfully taken its toll on your agitated state of mind, and you thought maybe relieving herself from at least this distress might give her more control.
"No need to think about those things. We will do as we are ordered. The battlefield is our only concern." An automatic response, usually given to his inferiors. What followed after was not. "Why is this bothering you so much?"
You started speaking only when you arrived at Vader's dull grey quarters separate from the superior officers at the bridge tower, it was similar to an antechamber in emptiness and size, the only difference was the massive cell-like cut windows circling in a flat arch showing the blue-green and occasionally violet planet of Naboo. "Queen Amidala should pose no threat to him, but for some reason he doesn’t trust her now that she is not present on the Imperial Senate and is out of his reach, there’s something going on here," you pondered, taking your mask off and staring at it for a while. "It goes against the relatively peaceful route he has trekked on until now, but I don't believe we are here for another treaty."
"I was not aware of your interest in politics. This was what had you so scatterbrained you couldn't even focus on combat." Vader slowly approached the glass window closes to him and stood still, his eyes on the planet. He had his hands folded behind his back. His side profile was illuminated by the faint translucent lights of the space from where you were. "Why the sudden curiosity, have you received intel?"
"It's not like that. I‘ve just had more time than necessary to think."
"And the thing you chose to think about was the Emperor not trusting Queen Amidala?"
"I’m thinking about how a possible invasion would go. The Emperor looked for the perfect opening to do so, and now that he has it, he won't let go. It feels like the era of treaties is about to be over." After placing your mask on the table where Vader usually kept the tools he used to modify his limbs, a feeling of nakedness washed over you as you looked at the view it created, it was not the Supreme Inquisitor talking at the moment, but simply you. "But I do have a bad feeling about everything in general, I can't get it out of my mind."
"Is that what The Force tells you?"
Gloved fingers gliding on the smooth arch of the top of the inquisitor mask, you kept your gaze on the T-shaped lens. Your lashes were heavy on your eyes, the words were weighing down on your entire face so they couldn't escape you it seemed. As ironic as it was that you were covering your real troubles with half-truths, you had never been this honest about your opinions before, only ever obeying whatever Vader had asked you of. "I'm not sure. I can't distinguish my instincts from the will of The Force yet. I don't think I ever will. Precognition is beyond me, I am but a Mandalorian, physical use is the only thing I really am good at. Still, there are times in which even I can feel it physically in my head. I know we are only soldiers, I know not to concern myself but The Force is. . . weird these days. That's why I'm not dismissing these thoughts."
"Perhaps what you used to call instincts is The Force talking to you. You are still fighting the Dark Side, that's why it's constipating you like this. Let the power guide you. Don't be afraid of too much."
"I have dedicated myself to your ways for a reason, I know what I have to do. I'm just a slow learner, but I do learn. Even if I can't fulfill your expectations, I won't ever disappoint you, Lord Vader."
Tingles traveled down your spine in warm waves, Vader's stare was definitely on you. "I will look into this as well, you keep focusing on the present." Then, a soft sigh dissolved in the air, so unnoticeably gentle that it had your eyebrows pulled together in surprise. "Anything else you wish to inform me about? I still feel heavy conflict clouding your mind."
"I don't wish to bother you with insigni—"
"When I ask questions I expect them to be answered."
He had seen it. The certain worm clogging your brain. Something was pushing you to squish it back in the darkness so he would forget about it. Not knowing what it was made you try to cover it up, words you‘d kept to yourself all this time poured out like hot-flowing blood out of a raw wound. "The thing is, why would Queen Amidala make a predictable and unnecessary move such as this when she is aware of the emperor's intentions in the first place? It doesn’t make sense."
"What do you know about his intentions?" It came sharp and quick. When you let go of the mask grounding you and turned to him, Vader's stiffness and slight tenseness caught you off guard; just as he had never heard a single peep of doubt from you, you had never seen Vader defensively alarmed as well. "You're basing this all on a single assumption. According to that then, how would Queen Amidala be aware of this so-called everything?"
"I told you it was insignificant."
"No. Explain it."
Hurried steps brought you right at Vader's side, aestuous eyes of his followed your almost apologetic state. The stars were witnessing a rare occurrence that day, the ice-breathing iron dragon was reduced into a young man, simply because he allowed anxiety seep out the cracks of his persona of The Dark Lord Darth Vader. Yet, they were merely only talking. You were pulled to him like a piece of metal caught into a magnetic field, wanting to clear his face from shadows. What had him this tense was a mystery that piqued your worry as much as it did your curiosity. 
"I meant absolute control when I said intentions, it wasn't something mysterious at all." You said, fighting the instinct to comb his wavy locks away from his face when you noticed his arms twitch forward towards you in a split second, stilling quickly right after that. "Queen Amidala, well at least Naboo has been cooperative and obedient so far, it is the Emperor’s home planet. It's illogical for them to make a move, without even sending a report of protest first about the Stormtrooper bases." Your voice was calculative and calm so that Vader would remain composed as well. "To be honest, every bone in my body is screaming trap at me. But I don't know what they would gain from laying a trap for us — or the empire."
A blank look.
Then a weak smile so twisted and bitter that the hairs on the back of your neck and the baby hairs framing the shape of your face stood up.
"I do," Vader said, triumphantly. Catharsis was etched into his tremulous voice, his pupils were dilated. "Have spy droids decode their hologram satellites immediately. I especially want the transcriptions of ghost calls, doesn't matter if it's from the palace or not."
At a loss for words, you couldn't catch up to his thought process but you had your orders, Vader's word came first. "Whatever we're looking for -- what if they chose to transport it manually as a message rather than transmitting it?"   
"I hope they did." The smile on his face didn't reach his eyes, his tone was low and dangerous when he answered. "Then we get to use the easy way to restore the peace."
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When you retired for the day, the shadows whispered all that you have been reduced to, and all you will ever be is eternal yearning chasing your tail, forever stuck in a circle, doomed to be your own destruction.
They swirled heavy and languid around where you laid folded into yourself, in your most vulnerable state —— closest to the ghost of the girl fron Clan Vizsla, the girl with tender flames that couldn't and wouldn't burn. They pooled in the hollow of your stomach, filled your womb with molten tar, and blotted your veins; until you became nothing but a vague shape in the dark.
The moderately average resting chamber in the giant Star Destroyer closed in on the you, only armored with a thin layer of sweat covering your heated skin. Darkness was a place you were your most comfortable in, but shadows drowning you were the servants of light —— the light that flowered from the warmest, the most cowardly of fires that was afraid to burn people.   
"Remember," the shadows murmured. The smell of beskar and ash was sticky on the wall of your nose, thickly dropping down to the lungs. Within the withering clouds of duskiness, two little marbles with the color of abysmal space stared back, the tiniest of shine reflecting like miniature novae. Black eyes like obsidian. "As no star is enough to light up the galaxy. As no star is enough to warm up its home. Remember who you are."
Supreme Inquisitor killed that treacherous girl every single night, but shadows were immortal nonetheless, you couldn't possibly reign victorious over them. The girl of Clan Vizsla, aware of that mostly overlooked knowledge, had always hidden her essence in the shadows; and now even her biggest nemesis was unable to snuff out the weak embers left of her. The ashes somehow managed to rekindle their spark.
The girl just refused to die and turned herself into invisible heavy shackles on your ankles.
Shadows caught up to you in oddest circumstances these days. Contrary to Imperial Officers and most of the Inquisitorius like the fallen Grand Inquisitor, respect out of obligation and orders did not sit well with you, you enjoyed proving yourself someone to be dreaded over and over again just to smell the satisfying presence of horror, yet sometimes you (momentarily) felt unaccomplished when people couldn't look you in the eye as they spoke.
The Mandalorian in you wanted to earn respect instead of forcing it out of somebody —— annoying, really, it was like an itch right in the middle of your back where you couldn't reach to scratch, and it never went away either. No matter what you did, you couldn't get rid of the leaden disappointment and dejection shooting up your spine at the sight of forehead-on-the-floor submission even if it lasted shorter than a blink.
The moment of humanity made you sick. You enjoyed being feared and bowed to, that meant you were stronger than them, that you were better, yet the tiny itch made it seem like you were some kind of noble character deep down when your aim, in the end, was establishing strength and demanding respect in exchange —— not honorably gaining it through charity work.
That's why you were feeling grumpy at yourself as you left First Brother behind in hurried steps after the report given to you in trembling fingers hid behind his waist in a grip, and a voice strained to control a slight shakiness. The Miralian was covered with a thin layer of sweat across his pink skin, the purple diamonds etched onto his nose area almost appeared a dark ultramarine as he stood with an imaginary walking stick shoved down his throat, he didn't move from his position until Supreme Inquisitor had completely disappeared from his sight.
He was your favorite Inquisitor to work with, mainly because he knew respect. You knew it was a Jedi habit, but you were in no place to complain about it, only focused on getting results and finally, your patience was rewarded —— not even the annoyance at your prolonged unstable emotions could get in the way of your enthusiasm. They were one step closer to ending this blockade and you were itching to return to your routine of hunting Jedi and getting rid of this mess of a state of mind. Things would soon return to the way they were. They had to.
With that in mind, you all but rushed to deliver the news to Vader, practically running to the safety of an end goal having formed in your mind. He was receiving some kind of report in the bridge part of the Star Destroyer, but immediately dismissed the two officers when he saw you approaching him with hurried steps. The T-shaped visor of her matte black helmet was reflecting light like flashes due to your speed.
Vader had the tendency to have conversations with you alone, even when you absolutely had to be in public he would maneuver to the most isolated place where they could speak privately, and his utter discontent at people coming at their way would immediately have effect in making them go the opposite way. If he was just done with having to deal with Imperial Officers and saw you as an escape, you did not know.
"It's done, Lord Vader," You reported with a datapad in your right gloved hand, the other was clutching the hilt of darksaber tucked away in your belt as you retreated to the giant windows looking directly at Naboo. Crowds would part at the sight of you together, as if leaving you to your solitude was a rule, so nobody was in the perimeter to hear the conversation. "Spy droids are on the job right now. The decryptor team is simultaneously working with incoming data. The droids can only do so much, so for the sake of both speed and efficiency, the only solution I had was this."
You handed him the datapad, his yellow eyes were dull as he scanned the incoming information. "Nothing looks particularly off as of now."
"I told them to look out for suspicious behavior as well. Could be a part of their cipher system."
"I would rather have direct contact with the senator, per protocol." Vader's hawk-like gaze turned almost condescendingly to the mostly purple planet as if he could spot the object of their conversation right away. The corners of his lips twitched upwards for a millisecond. "Compared to the queen, he is surprisingly easier to crack."
He peculiarly allowed himself to be human around her, occasional boyish grins and smirks found their way to his face often when you were near. It wasn't a first-time realization but very much a reassurance every time it occured. The thought, this time also as well, managed to ease your overheated mind and you allowed herself to relax a bit, removed your hand from darksaber, and clutched them on the back of your waist. "Which is why Queen Amidala insists on being the mediator."
A scoff came from him. "She knows even the person they chose has certain weaknesses."
A wave of bitter taste washed over your mouth. "We do have to wait for Emperor Palpatine's orders about entering their planetary space. . . to exploit those weaknesses."
"I don't need to be right in front of him to do that."
He was capable of doing unspeakable things to people deeming they were safe from him just because they were seperated by monitors and screens, there was nothing surprising about his ominous declaration. Yet, something akin to an irritating feeling peeling away from your skin and an itching weight being lifted off of your gut made you blink strongly. You had to swallow because inside of your mouth felt like you had just stuffed a handful of sand down your throat. Of course. This was it. This was why Inquisitorius had to be here. How could you have been so oblivious?
"How inconvenient," you said, fully turning to him sharply. An excitement that would put the one you felt when you got the report from First Brother to shame was pulsating in your temples and ears. "It would have been better to have the excuse to see him directly."
Vader's eyebrows twitched downwards slightly. He must've had noted the change in your demeanor. "Why?"
"Because I just figured out why we're here." Your hands jerked to point at Naboo. It was clear as day to you now. You were so buried in your own mind to see what was right in front of you! "To give The Emperor an excuse for the order. This is our mission."
Vader, contemplating your discovery, hummed before speaking. He didn't look baffled at all. "You're saying this is an investigation."
"Disguised as an embargo." You nodded. Even the voice warping planted in your helmet could hide your emotions. You were more than happy to push all of your turmoil this far on this reason alone. "I can't believe I figured it out so late.“
"You weren't supposed to figure anything out." Vader, opposed to you, was very discontent with your state and you had failed to notice it from how his eyes had narrowed before he spoke. "Our input in political matters is not needed. It isn't our place."
In this light, he almost looked like he was leering down at you and that made your heart jump to your throat. Maybe you shouldn't have expressed your mind so openly like this. You weren’t one to mix personal opinions with orders in the first place. This... The chaos you were in as of late had made you slip up. You had had done your best to remain as a blank slate while putting only your lord's agenda and wishes before anything, and it truly was the only thing you cared about — that you should have cared about.
You had to pull yourself together.
"I apologize," you said, now more focused and professional to show you didn't mean any disobedience by your words. "Of course I will follow only orders, Lord Vader. I haven't forgotten my place."
That earned you an unexpected tut. "That's not——" He shut his mouth with an audible click coming from how hard his teeth had snapped together. Your eyebrows, not visible from your helmet, shot upwards at Vader's incomplete sentence. The Dark Lord of the Sith would have never held his tongue back in any occasion and he never entertained idle chit-chat, yet. . . He had briefly lost control there. He did manage to school his tone back into place, but you were already too shocked. "Just remember we will only do what is necessary. The Emperor always has a higher purpose we're not meant to know."
You had forgotten you were surrounded by the crew of the bridge, the mention of The Emperor brought back some clarity to you, as the rehearsed words of self-evaluation slipped past your lips. You had autopiloted into a submissive soldier stance. "I see now that lack of clearance has got the best of me. I meddled in matters simply not my business at all."
You didn't dare to look up at him, too immersed in trying not to spark his anger. Direct defiance was never your intention and deep down, you were already ruthlessly scolding yourself for it. You should have never opened your mouth. That's right. You were never supposed to open your mouth ever. You would only be good to go when you listened and followed orders. Opinions and thoughts were not welcome. Not that you had problems with them in the first place, but you did have to teach yourself again.
You hadn't noticed Vader's silence and his golden gaze scanning you up and down as if you were a book to read, it only became apparent to you when he started speaking again, his voice was heavy and gravelly. "This kind of thing will put a target sign on your head. You must stay out of The Emperor's sight, I will handle everything. All you have to do is follow orders."
This was the perfect chance to both change the subject and deliver the other updates you got from earlier, and you took it. He would be displeased because of the delay, but you couldn't skip on your duty either, it was with heavy heart that you gave him the news. "Speaking of orders, First Brother reported to me before our meeting. The holo-faker will be dealt with shortly. They are working on locating her."
"You mean to say she’s not dead yet?" As expected, sourness had immediately settled on his face.
"Unfortunately."
"Shortly doesn't cut it. You and I both know these adverbs only exist to buy more time." An exasperated huff, like burning steam on your skin, cut his sentence. His artificial hand's fingers had started flexing and you knew from this that his first instinct in handling this was violence - and rightfully so. If it was up to you without any interventions, the holo-faker would have been dead for the seventh time now. "Who is this holo-faker, why is it taking so long? We have more pressing matters at hand."
Your chest swelled up with the acidic breath she took in for that answer. "Her name is Bo-Katan Kryze——"
"What?" His blaster shot of an interruption was almost high-pitched and even further, your heart rate picked up because of how Vader's normally controlled Force presence had crackled like a sudden whip lash against the air. "Repeat that name."
The way he said that was stone cold and had sunk on your chest as dead weight.
"Bo-Katan Kryze." It was too hard to keep your voice in a flat tone, so it appeared very tense in return. He can misunderstand, you thought to yourself, and fumbling words pushed through your filter without warning. A loss of control on your part, no matter the form it took. "A Mandalorian like me, I know. However, my judgment is not affected. I will have her eliminated."
"We will speak no more of this here. Come."
Everything happened in a flash. His unwarranted, lightning anger blended in with their literal teleportation to the official meeting chambers reserved for the inquisitor team aboard the ship. It was like you had been wounded, but the adrenaline and shock holding your body together was holding the pain back.
You had killed fellow Mandalorian kin before. You did it every time one cane to take darksaber away from you for honor. Vader knew you didn't hold any affection or lingering attachment to your roots. Your only relief would be accepting you were uninformed, or simply not smart enough to understand what had him angered like a dragon preparing to wreak havoc over his gold hoard having been barely disturbed by an outsider.
After the sliding metal door closed behind them and trapped you in a dimly steel, ever-shrinking room due to his sizzling Force presence, with only a giant holotable to display maps in the middle, his heaving back slowly regained back a stable breathing rhythm, and he turned to you much more composed, the powerwalk they had here probably having taken some of his bottled up agitation. "Did you have an audience with her?" he said, the sentence more of a domineering demand than a question. There was a distant fire in his eyes.
You did your best to remain calm to not provoke him in any way, and obeyed. "Yes, it was required."
"Did you speak with her directly?"
"Yes, since I had the recordings of the Jedi had to deliver them personally." One of your canines caught the inside corner of your mouth. "Is something wrong——"
He ignored your remark. "Has she said anything to you?"
Have I failed? How have I failed? Why am I being interrogated right now? "Apart from business, no."
"That can’t be it. Are you lying to me?"
That sentence was straight up a punch to your ribcage, you were breathless as you answered that question. "No."
But that did not satisfy him. He was a predator pacing left and right upon hearing it. The lampdisks were full on and the meeting room eerily bright, but his darkening presence was casting a shadow over everything. "Out of all the beings in the galaxy, how did she end up being——" He was mumbling to himself in a mildly manic state, and when he suddenly shouted, the already panicking you almost jumped out of your skin. "Damn it!"
Vader's entire self-control was gone like the wind, a catastrophic hurricane in the Force is what he was. Rumbling and roaring with no restraint, no restraint. It made your hands tremble uncontrollably and sucked the strength from your core entirely. And all it took for the leash to snap was not The Emperor, not the missions, not the imperial officers and not the incompetent inquisitors, but a single name of an insignificant Mandalorian holo-faker.
You had to fix this somehow. You had to do something. You didn't understand your mistake but you had to put enough effort to get back on your feet. "Lord Vader, I don't follow——"
"Don't call me that!" You had never heard him yell before. Always the silent and obscure, actions-over-words commander that he was, Lord Vader did never need to raise his voice to get what he wanted, he simply didn't bother with that. Yet that was a broken shout at the top of his lungs; a shattered clap of thunder, yet it was a piercing shriek of a wounded animal enough to make your ears go numb for few seconds. Bleeding. A cascade of emotions were bleeding out of him.
Silence fell between you like the hammer of a giant.
Your insides churned and twisted and crushed until all you could feel was just a mash of mixed goop flesh filling you like cotton and only a void in the middle of your skull, as if you had jumped out of hyperdrive with a damaged deceleration equalizer.
A shiver shook your shoulders.
There was a man in front of you, not Lord Vader, and certainly not a Lord of the Sith. An upset, disturbed and disordered hot mess of a young man, with eyes  the color of cold dark blue before the sun appears in the horizon, swimming in the agony of an entire sunken star, was despairing over his subordinate addressing him as the superior he was.
What did he want from you exactly? How did you end up in a conversation webbed with lines that should never be crossed?
"Call all the inquisitors involved in the operation and leave us."
"As you wish." You kept your voice carefully blank and monotone, but the emotions were as scattered as a star cluster. Despite that, as Supreme Inquisitor, your instincts knew the need for professionalism to be restored back, but it was actually cowardice that made you lean entirely on respect to gain much needed stable ground. "Do you want me to send out a scouting team to find out if she has reached Mandalore? They could look for a way to cheat the treaty."
"No. You're off the holo-faker case."
It was a small command, a simple order, a rightful decision really, but that still felt like stun blasts exploding inside your brain that left it ringing and the room spinning around you. "Why? I can fix everything, I can go personally——"
"No." To your own ears, to your heart, the voice that came from his lips didn't sound like his own. It was deeper, darker, clipped and oiled, resonating from the depths of the Dark Side he tapped into whenever he was facing enemies and allies alike. It didn't sound like him at all, he didn't direct that tone —— that stance to you ever, and it smoked with fury. "You'll remain here with me."
You stood welded to the floor, motionless. You weren’t even truly aware of speaking. It was as if someone else were using your mouth. "I have met her face to face, I'll get it done faster, let me go to Mandalore——"
"I said no! That's an order!"
A hiccupping gasp rose out of you that the mask didn’t pick up.
And, now, finally, you recognized the voice that had came out of you in utter desperation.
It belonged to the shadows. It belonged to gentle melodies of the benevolent hearth. It belonged to the girl who was afraid of being cast away.
You could only stand there, sick at heart, stunned with helplessness, the fatigue in your guts turning heavier and heavier.
". . . Understood."
Lord Vader passed his flesh hand over his eyes and drew a long, heavy breath.  In a much lower, calmer, quieter tone, he said, "You won't get involved with her. Promise me." He looked thoroughly miserable, but you felt too numb, so numb that you were looking at the world behind iced glass. It stung even to stand here.
"I have received your orders.” Your lips, conditioned only to speak of duty, fulfilled their responsibility. "I'm calling the inquisitors immediately."
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spacelizzbian · 6 months
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Ahsoka s1ep7
That guy be like: false Jedi? Witches?? Space whales??? In my star wars?¿?¿? Unheard of.
Respectfully, please stop wasting precious time from these last two eps on this new republic nonsense 😭
Omg please let it be an audio recording of Leia saying "fuck off" in pg way
Do you think Carrie Fisher would've been on this show as a cameo if she could? Would've loved to see her say fuck off (in a pg way)
You can tell Ahsoka hasn't put these recordings on in forever...the little bow?
She be healing 🥺
I also like the tone Ahsoka used in "he was a great master" cause you get the sense that she mourns for him.
Idk I think that's a neat way of her moving forward regarding her feelings on Anakin/Vader (though I still wish they acknowledged it more in ep 5 but I'm still chewing on my thoughts on that whole episode)
Ahsoka really out there pretending she doesn't give a shit if they're in the wrong galaxy lmaooo such a troll, I love her
NO ARE THEY SHOOTING THE WHALES?!?!
NO STOP NOOOOOO
IF I SEE A WHALE DIE I WILL CRY I LOVE WHALES SO MUCH
The relief I felt when they all jumped thank god
Poor Morgan, she's so aware of the nonsense the good guys get away with when defeating their foes but she comes off so paranoid in universe. Doomed by knowledge of star wars' silly narrative quirks 😔
"Put her on a path of her own choosing so that no matter what direction she takes, we'll always be one step ahead of her"
That makes no sense
Just cause Thrawn says it and it's briliantly acted does not mean that was sound logic 💀
Huyang is me, I too find it bs that they sensed Ahsoka coming for their asses via space whale
Love how Ahsoka and Thrawn are out here playing 3D chess while Sabine and Ezra are just vibing in these big pods lmao
"The emperor died" "that's what people say"
Ahaha don't remind me of that, I will start biting
Omg Sabine being so offended and Ezra being so confused has me in stictches haha
Same bro, wish they showed us how exactly that happened
Fellars, when she says "it's complicated" she means "I saw my master get murdered before my very eyes and disregarded the last thing she said to me all in a desperate move to find you"
WTF WAS THAT SHOT TO THE SCARY WITCH RIGHT AFTER AHSOKA IS LIKE "I SEE HER" 💀💀
Sabine upon seeing Shin and Baylan: "NYO" 😡
Baylan, tf do you mean Shin's path leads her in a different direction?!?! All I've gathered from the 5 lines of dialogue she was allowed is that she wants to be on top, secure.
She did not seem too keen on joining the witches and sees the Empire as a means to an end. What's stopping her from just outright joining the new republic if you leave her on her own?! Seemingly the only thing stopping her was her connection to you and your teachings, ya dingus.
I like this show, but this makes no sense for the characters they've set up, why wouldn't he take her with him so they can both wield the ancient superweapon?? 🙃
Wait. The raiders in this whole different galaxy shoot normal ass blasterfire?¿?¿?
Come on, that's so boring
(They do look cool if not like normal star wars bounty hunter types)
Huyang is such a little shit, honestly his banter with Ahsoka has been one of the highlights of this show for me. Especially now that Ahsoka seems to have regained some of her original snark spark
DEAD ASS
Ahsoka dropping out of that ship RIGHT where Baylan is, IS THE FUNNIEST SHIT 😭
He really be like "huh, was sure I killed you 🤔"
"The Force is my ally, it's all I need" very Jedi of him, Kanan would be so proud
That shot of the hermit alien headbutting a raider with a pot is my fav thing ever
Yooooooo, seeing the saber actually lose some of its form when being pushed back with the force was sick
That piano 👌
Did Huyang just know Ahsoka was in trouble and instinctively thought "guess I'll shoot flares at her" 💀
Ahsoka is riding a space wolf, Filoni can finally rest
Sabine getting flipped was such a funny shot
Fight choreo go weeeeeeeee
Ok this guy really embodies Ezra well, this is EXACTLY how he would bs his way outta this pickle lmao
Props to Shin, if I saw Ahsoka barreling in like that smirking like a real psycho I'd have noped the fucke outta there instantly
Did Ahsoka just kick a hand that was swinging a lightsaber at her?!?!?
Truely deranged behaviour, pop off queen 😌
Why did Thrawn have a whole ass ppt prepared 😂
Ah yes, time, the thing I feel like this whole show did not know how to spend correctly
I can feel this season ending on a cliffhanger, I don't even know if a second season was announced beforehand but ain't no way all of this is concluding satisfyingly in one more ep
Ahsoka seeing Shin looking like a wet stray cat and going pspspsps is so her
Not Ahsoka being 110% aware she must be immortal or smth and using that knowledge for trolling 😂💀
That was such a good hug omg
And the laugh?!? I dont think she's laughed since rebels 🥺😭
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kenobster · 7 months
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@ahsoka-ina-hood replied to their post: "So what is your number 1 draw to watching the Ahsoka show?"
@kenobster I am asking I yearn to know
Oh god lmao. Okay.
First of all, I would like you to know that I answered an anon's ask for the sake of describing the Vader Mpreg AU just for you lmao (and anon, ofc). Otherwise, this post would've been WAY too long.
Second of all, part of what I liked about The Rise of Skywalker is that Palpatine only ever thinks of himself. His creation of Snoke and the other strands is very ego-driven and selfish — to his own detriment. Palpatine's strands are always derivative and flawed from their original template. In other words, the only successful strand (aka Rey) occurred when someone else's DNA mistakenly got involved. I found that very in-character for Palpatine, very fascinating, and... well, suffice to say... unsurprisingly important for later. :)
In the Vader Mpreg AU, lizard brain has regrettably tasked me with coming up with a justification for one of Palpatine's unique modifications to Vader's body. Maybe Vader starts miscarriaging (he is going through an awful lot). Or maybe Palpatine is testing some new method of strand creation. Whatever the case, lizard brain would like it if Palpatine found it annoying to have to insert the uterus via surgery every time. Since Vader's already pooping out of a bag, Palpatine finds it Convenient™ to detach Vader's bowels from his asshole entirely. That way, the butt canal can instead be hooked up to the uterus with a synthetic cervix.
Is the butt canal stretchy enough to poop out a baby? No.
However, Palpatine can create some pre-fertilized clone-baby eggs and slingshot 'em up Vader's butt canal like merch from a t-shirt canon. :)
Maybe one day, Palpatine decides that preparing fertilized eggs in a laboratory is not perverse enough. Maybe he decides that it'd be fun to implant a synthetic ovary next to Vader's uterus that is genetically engineered to produce unfertilized eggs with Palpatine's DNA. Once complete, Palpatine can then fuck Vader's butt and make his clone babies the good ol' fashioned way.
With a touch of Jurassic Park Science, maybe Vader's DNA can accidentally get involved. And, just like what happened with Rey, maybe Vader's DNA could potentially lead to an non-uggo, totally normal-looking baby. And maybe.... just maybe.... this happens to be the exact same pregnancy Vader is enduring when he flees to Obi-Wan and pleads for sanctuary.
Maybe, lizard brain proposes, this baby can even be a specific Star Wars character. A character of unknown origins who is extremely hot and full of Anakin-esque qualities. A character who first appeared in a trailer for the Ahsoka series....
Do you hate this idea? Don't worry. I do, too.
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intermundia · 2 years
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So lots of people know that there is a river Styx in Greek mythology, and that it’s the boundary between Earth and Hades, the river over which the souls of the dead are ferried by Charon. Some others may know that it’s an idiom to “swear by the river Styx,” for the most solemn and binding oaths, the story in Hesiod being that the river goddess Styx sided with Zeus during the Titanomachy. What they might not know is that the word Στύξ, Styx, comes from a root which means like:
1. hated, abhorred (of persons and things) 2. hateful or hostile to one 3. gloomy
In Greek, the way you make an oath is to specify a superhuman power as witness to the declaration and guarantor of its truth. It basically calls down a conditional curse to take effect if the promise is violated. In English, we swear ‘by’ or ‘to’, in Greek, it’s the direct object of the verb to swear. One ‘swore Styx’ instead of ‘swore by Styx,’ basically saying I swear on the hateful river that is the path to death (aka the river which will take me if I fail, a conditional self-curse) that I will do this thing.
But what else could it mean to swear an oath on hate, on shuddering, gloomy loathing? I personally think it could mean that the energy that you would have otherwise given to your hate is the energy that you swear you will use to fuel your commitment to upholding the terms of the oath. The more hatred you have inside, the more you are motivated to stick to terms.
The reason that I'm thinking about hate and motivation and the promises we make ourselves because of Darth Vader (lmao as always) and how his hatred, his specific and personal loathing of Obi-Wan, motivates him in the Kenobi show. He is so deeply and completely driven from this emotional center, he's sworn revenge, sworn to himself, I will abide and seethe in my anger until I can take it out on Obi-Wan himself.
It's the kernel at the heart of who he is, this oath he's sworn to have his hatred motivate him, his hatred as the center, the burning heart of things. He asks "where is HE" over and over, his mind so fixated, all he is able to see is Obi-Wan when he's near, all he's able to think about is Obi-Wan when he's distant. He's a liminal figure already, a walking body that doesn't breathe on its own, caught between life and death. His hatred is what keeps him alive.
Honestly after he "kills" Obi-Wan on the Death Star, I think that this stellar core of hate is snuffed out. Anakin has other hate in general to keep him being Vader, of course, but the shuddering loathing of the man who he loved and who had (in his opinion) betrayed him and cut him to pieces and left him to burn—his oath on hatred was fulfilled, and the hatred may linger ambiently afterward, but it's no longer motivating him forward.
There's no true revenge for him unless Obi-Wan screams and suffers and acknowledges that he's being subject to revenge. By disappearing into the Force, he denies Vader this validation and resolution. Vader tries to destroy his legacy instead, but he's running on fumes, trying to prove that he's gotten the final revenge to himself. It's just not the same without the object of his hate there to suffer.
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darlin-djarin · 1 year
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what's your opinion on the Kenobi show? I really liked it :) although I wish it had a bigger budget
oof omg this question 😭
so i watched like half of it when it aired, and then i took a 2 month pause on it because i was traveling over the summer, and where i went, disney+ wasn’t available. once i got back, i watched the rest of the episodes without thinking too much on the show itself.
i thought it was okay. there wasn’t a big “wow” factor for me, but i did love the expansion on obi-wan after what happened in rots. i loved how it focused on leia rather than luke also, but i thought it was super interesting on how the show handled how ben was an influence on the twins’ life while growing up.
i think the plotline IDEA was very good but it wasn’t executed super amazingly. still good, just not a “wow” type of execution. i think budgeting was definitely an influence as well. felt pretty low-key and if i’m gonna be honest, i feel like i could recreate the show myself.
the characters were kinda random. i liked reva and i didn’t realize she was a jedi youngling until it was said directly. i usually have a knack for predicting things but ig that two month pause got me a little slow lmao. once it was revealed that she was a youngling, it was kinda like “umm… okay?? so?? so she’s just some random ass jedi youngling who’s mad at vader?” and it felt like reva wasn’t done as well as she could’ve been. i’m not saying it felt rushed but i felt like they could’ve expanded more on reva and who she was, because i definitely felt a disconnect with her character because we barely knew who she was. i think she’s a very interesting character and i wish we got more expansion on her and her fall to the dark side.
dk abt that one con guy. he was weird. random. he was fine ig but he was just kinda… there. like some random ass con guy. ok cool.
i liked the scene where obi-wan was like “do what she says” or whatever abt leia when they were with the rebel base (was it a rebel base? don’t remember). i thought it was cute and it felt really good that obi-wan was actually listening to leia and giving her what she needs instead of discarding her bc she’s a child.
now the whole “you didn’t kill anakin skywalker. i did” like WOWWW now THAT was the “wow” factor i was looking for. vader giving obi-wan that kind of confirmation and relief that obi-wan wasn’t the one who failed… like woah. omg. that was good. that whole scene and the build up and just EVERYTHING like that was awesome. loved it.
overall the show was good, but i felt disconnected from it often. the scene with vader and obi-wan was amazing but it didn’t make up for the rest of the show.
thank you for the ask! sorry this ended out really long. i just have a lot of opinions and feelings about this show. lmk your thoughts!!
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I love the jedi but enjoy the sith, mostly vader,new republic sith and old republic sith, do yoi have a lost of your favorite star wars villains.
In order, Dooku, Thrawn, Palpatine, Vader, OT-era Tarkin, Maul - and TCW!Hondo right after Dooku if that counts.
Pretty vanilla lmao. I like the Son as a concept but he's really not hardcore enough to really embody what he's supposed to represent. (There's not enough of the slimy slithering madness and viciousness that makes the Sith do stuff like sacrifice Jedi on altars and do blood magic rituals, among other things.) He's too tame for something supposedly worse than the Sith, though he'd be horrifying if he'd been more Dark-Side-y.
So, Dooku, because he's a disaster and a mirror to Anakin's garbage and because there's a lot of genuinely interesting things about a character who was among the wisest and noblest and who knows what the darkness is and willing embraces it anyway. he's Star Wars' Saruman and I love Saruman. It certainly helped that he was played by Sir Christopher Lee. The man was just that good.
Thrawn, because of the smooth, calm demeanor - much like Dooku's. That scene where he slowly explains what a kalikori is without revealing right away who is Hera, toying with us with his incredible score in the background, gave me shivers the first 4-5 times I watched it. I love sophisticated and collected villains. Brutish villains feel too simplistic and not nearly as frightening. I also love Star Wars aliens.
Palpatine because he's a delight to hate. He has no redeeming qualities whatsoever - he's just absolute selfishness embodied and that makes if very fun. Also love the 'frail' old man whose power is in his insidiousness. I love how maniacally happy about his plans he always is and I love to think of how completely bored he must have been during the Empire days, before Luke showed up and gave him something to plot about. Sure I wish the Zillo beast could have flattened him to a Sheev pancake - or that Dooku would have just punted him into the sun before Naboo, but hey, at least he got thrown down a reactor and exploded twice and was never ever heard of again, right?
Vader because he's a powerhouse and that's always impressive. James Earl Jones' voice was always magnificent as well and there's something so expressive about faceless characters.
OT Tarkin because- smooth, calm and collected old villain. I really have a type ah ah. There's something so maddening about that complete confidence that they're right, that end-justify-the-means mentality they confuse for wisdom, that dismissive way they see the hot blooded righteous heroes as so beneath them...
Maul mostly for the times he goes completely crazy and either turns into a spider or a Temple-dwelling Sith cockroach and runs around painting Kenobi on the walls with his blood. I love his arc with Obi-Wan, I love what it says about the light and the Dark, the Jedi and the Sith, and the Florrum and Twin Suns duels are my favorite ever.
Finally, Hondo... Well, is Hondo. Much smarter, much more ruthless, and much saner than people give him credit for - just spectacularly greedy and ballsy. I wouldn't call him a villain so much as the true example of what a 'morally gray' character is. It's not good guys in impossible situations like Mace, it's not complex villains like Dooku, it's not the image people have of a tortured prince of darkness that deep down feels really sad about all the murder he's doing and it's not the selfless hero who angsts about quickly killing a monster that one time - it's Hondo.
I'm generally pretty indifferent to Ventress, Jango, Boba, bounty hunters like Cad Bane, the Hutts, villains of an episode, or more minor villains and/or reformed antagonists like Bo-Katan, Kallus, etc - as characters anyway. I might like them when they're onscreen or like their place in the story but they don't do much for me individually beyond that.
And a special mention goes to Miraj Scintel - the Zygerrian Queen and only Star Wars villain I truly and deeply loathe. I hate seeing her onscreen, I hate hearing her talk, I hate watching her move, I hate her aspirations, I just detest her. Everything about her is infuriating.
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javierpena-inatacvest · 3 months
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💐 once you receive this lovely bouquet of flowers you have to mention five things you love, publicly, and send it to 10 of your favorite followers if you want. SPREAD POSITIVITY! ⛅️ (ik this was sent to you already but heheh <3)
HI FRIEND!!!
That's okay, thank you for sending again, I can think of 5 more things to love!! 🥺💕
-Star Wars: It's been my obsession since I was like 6/7 years old. I think I went as Darth Vader or Anakin Skywalker at least 4 Halloweens in a row. My favorite movie is Empire Strikes Back, but Revenge of the Sith is a close second!!
-Water: this is kind of weird but I drink like a gallon of water a day and you will never find me without my water bottle, it is a part of me LMAO
-Cleaning: Cleaning is so relaxing to me and I legit vacuum my house every day bc I am a psychopath 💀
-New Girl: It's my comfort show and I probably spend 85% of time talking quoting it 😭 (my husband just turned 29 so I'm pretty sure I yelled TWENTY NOINEEEEEEE like 104 times that day 🥴)
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ravenalla · 1 year
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So fun fact, I wasn’t into Star Wars at all growing up and never saw any of the movies but I did watch Cartoon Network and would sometimes just have random episodes from Clone Wars on in the background. So while most people knew about Darth Vader first and then found out his entire backstory as Anakin Skywalker, I first knew him as the random good-looking Jedi guy in the show with the orange lady and then later found out he became the evil masked villain from the movies. I couldn’t wrap my head around it either cause just based off the show he seemed so nice and average to me, it was literally the I am your father plot twist but in reverse lmao
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merrysithmas · 2 years
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So, I’ve been scrolling through your blogs/tags and I’m a big fan. I love the way you write about Star Wars especially Obi & Ani. I have a few questions if you don’t mind me asking.
1.) Do you think Anakin’s fall could have been prevented and have balance be restored a different way? If so how?
2.) Did Order 66 have to happen in your opinion?
3.) What are your favorite ‘fix it’ tropes?
4.) Do you have any fic recommendations for Anakin not turning or getting to the brink but pulling back? Also, like some happy healthy Ani? Like where our boy gets the love and support he needs for all that trauma? Maybe even where he’s trained outside of the Jedi (for his benefit) but he’s still the badass Chosen One? (Love to see demi-god Ani in action)
thank you very much!! :) love our fandom
I think he was 100% destined as a demi-god created by the Force to restore balance as per the Prophecy. I think this could have gone ANY NUMBER OF WAYS. However, "destiny" is NOT the product of one person's will - which the movies display excellently. It is a web of desires from infinite influences - Sidious, Anakin himself, Padme, the Council, Obi-wan, the Senate, the populace, the war, etc etc. I think Anakin restoring balance could have looked a lot differently if many people made many different decisions. The way it happened, as a genre of Tragedy, was the culmination of many mistakes made by literally everyone - and executed, quite literally, by the demi-god Anakin in a way which he was not even in complete control of himself. He weeps when he massacres the Temple, he knows it was wrong. He weeps when kneeling in front of Sidious after Mace dies - regretting his actions, those Sidious ensures by holding his love for Padme and his child(ren) to his throat like a knife. He rambles to Padme on Mustafar that he intends to kill Sidious to bring peace to the Galaxy--- even as the Executioner, Anakin is a slave to fate. He never finds peace until the Prophecy is fulfilled and he dies (and is free of it), 20 years later.
No, but I think the Jedi Order was always going to be destroyed no matter what. When I first watched RotS I thought it was pretty convincingly suggested by the on-screen text that had Anakin not fallen and become Vader (a slave to Sidious who remained the Dark Lord), the Jedi Council itself would have assumed control over the Senate upon Palpatine's death and would have become corrupted by the power themselves. It always seemed to me that it was suggested that they would have become the Sith themselves, keeping the power of the Senate to themselves and eventually turning to the Dark Side because of it: thus destroying the Order & each other. A group of extremely powerful Sith - with Anakin, yet again, on the outside but in an entirely different manner (the destiny of the Force/Prophecy enacted in a diff way).
My fav fix-it tropes are NOBODY DIES/EVERYONE LIVES, they runaway and start a new life, Anakin escapes Sidious and fights with the Rebellion, Padme becomes Chancellor, Anakin-and-Obi-wan on the run and having to live on Tatooine together (Lmao), Mortis-AU where Soka-Obi-Ani all become demi-gods of the Galaxy, Anakin learns to manipulate life with the Force but only with Obi-wan's help, Obi-wan helps rehabilitate Vader (and Vader shows him it's okay to embrace his Dark Side) among many others!
I don't! I can only ceaselessly recommend my fav SW fic ever which is Return to the Point of No Return by cthene on AO3. Great fic that has elements of Vader returning to the Light - but more painfully. Can anyone else rec this anon some awesome fic?! (which I will also most definitely read...)
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theasexuwhalestuff · 2 years
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Thoughts while watching Part VI of the Kenobi Series
Obi-Wan's proud smile as he watches Leia cheer another kid up with Lola.
Ex-fucking-cuse me how tf is Reva alive??? Everyone is not fucking Darth Maul, okay? And neither does she have two stomachs like the Grand Inquisitor so what fucking gives?? Guess surviving being impaled isn't a big deal these days, huh? I can just hear Qui-Gon looking down from Force Heaven in utter contempt. He died, but these bitches be prancing around all over the place.
Owen is so gruff but so fond of baby Luke I can't.
Obi finally ready to continue the cycle of sacrificing himself for the greater good. Yay, I guess?? Since that's who he was as a Jedi?? Going back to normal.
Lmao Beru snarking back "Whose fault is that?" when Owen says Obi-Wan's gone.
Beru pulling out a giant blaster and Owen just going O.O is my new favourite thing.
Baby Leia sad that the battered grimy old man is going out to get himself killed.
"You're ten years old. But you won't always be." Excuse you STFU how dARE.
Yay sad parting hugs.
The way he smiles and promises he'll come back. That's the our old Obi-Wan right there. Ewan McGregor go OFF.
See the Grand Inquisitor knows exactly when to STFU and keep his head. But his tiny conceding nod to Vader tho LMAO. Like okay, do as you wish dumbass.
The Lars Parents tryna seem hopeful and putting on a brave face for Luke, but you know that kid knows this might be the last time he sees 'em.
Obi-Wan's twinkly-eyed smile at finding Lola in his robe 😭😭😭 Our man is back.
Lola's nervous beep omg.
"I will do what I must," my ass. Bitch can't kill his son-brother for shit.
Omg omg the old lightsaber-over-shoulder-one-hand-out pose is BACK!!!!!
Oh, so he's suddenly back in his old form now? After being fucking roasted days ago? Nice.
Owen and Beru are such icons. Going up against an Inquisitor for their baby boy.
Okay, but Reva severed a woman's hand for talking back. And you're telling me he left Owen and Beru alive? For what reason exactly?
Run, Luke, run.
Ok NOW the duel's starting to get interesting.
Obi-Wan Kenobi fucking smiling as he flings boulders at Vader with the Force is not something I knew I needed.
What an icon. Yet he still won't be able to kill him. 😒
Reva, you're really gonna stoop as low as Anakin, huh? That's the hill you wanna die on? Killing children? Okay gurl. You do you I guess.
DARTH VADER WHEEZING AND GROANING AND TOPPLING OVER OH MY FUCKING GOD YESSSS
Obi-Wan you are such a fucking wimp oh my FUCKING God. Yes, that's the child you raised and loved. But you saw with your own eyes the kinda destruction and carnage he leaves in his wake. And still you thought he might be worth saving?? And even when you realised he couldn't be saved you just up and left????? Explain this to me. You brought fucking Darth Vader to his knees--one of the few ppl who can even do that--and yet you just chose to not kill him??? Have you learnt NOTHING from Mustafar?? You're just gonna let him crawl wheezing back to his bacta tank so he can unleash the rage he has built up for you on innocent people?? Like WHAT THE FUCK MAN. Make it make sense.
Idk why Obi-Wan and other ppl choose to see it like Vader killed Anakin BS. Vader IS Anakin. That's what he became. That's what he chose. That's who he is now. His upbringing might not have been ideal and he might have been groomed. But the choices we make are ultimately our own. Ppl be actin' like his life trauma absolves him of killing literal children lmfaoo. Carry on.
Wow. Luke lost in the desert is the ONE TIME Owen doesn't look like he's contemplating physical violence when he sees Obi-Wan.
Beru not batting an eye at all at Obi-Wan's appearance pretty much confirms she sees him around often. At the market at Anchorhead, when she's out with Luke, maybe.
Reva showing up with a slumped Luke is a sight. Owen and Beru's faces. Thinking she carried over their child's body. Good God. I'm not even a parent but man the chills. Wondering how actual parents would react upon watching that scene.
Their look of confusion, caution and wtf is wrong with you directed at Reva.
Reva seeing real parents actually loving their kid. Their whole world stopping when they think their kid's dead. 💔💔💔
Owen's final look of pure contempt and what tf do you think you accomplished at Reva. Owen, my man, pls stop being such an icon.
Reva crying and Obi-Wan comforting her is another thing I didn't know I needed.
Reva trying to get revenge by killing Vader's kid, to avenge the kids he killed, but failing cuz Luke is a kid and someone else's family is just poetic.
"He killed them all, and I couldn't do it."
And yet she's afraid of becoming the monster that slaughtered her family.
I'm actually gonna thank Star Wars for showing how deep childhood trauma and hurt run.
Vader abt to force-choke the nearest being and Palpatine just goes you seem agitated, bro.
Palpatine tryna figure out if he needs to have his pet cyborg murdered.
Alderaan my beloved.
Dang nooo why is it so beautiful it's all gonna get destroyed.
Baby Leia getting ready for her next adventure. I need more wholesome scenes like this in movies 😭❤😭❤😭❤
Ok but literally HOW did they think Vivian Lyra Blair was gonna pass for a 10-year-old??? She was eight during filming and she looks even more baby. Look at how smol she is and her chubby baby hands 😭❤😭❤😭❤
I just keep rewatching the scene and laughing. How are her chubby baby hands actually doing any fastening??
How did Breha not see the holster before? No srsly? Did Bail help her hide it? Cuz if not, what in the rich parent BS...
Wow. Imagine having loving, supportive parents when you needed it the most as a kid. Just wow.
I fucking love Alderaan so much.
OMG. THERE IT IS. THERE'S OBI-WAN. It's the same smile from ROTS--the EXACT same smile. Our man is truly back for good holy shit look at his happy smile 😭❤😭❤😭❤
HOLY FUCK his old cadence and playful tone--they're BACK. THIS IS OBI-WAN KENOBI FRIENDS. NOT BEN.
Hugging Bail 😭
Omg him just crossing his arms and giving her a playful smile. THIS is the Obi-Wan we know. This is how he is with kids.
"I think you should sleep." DAMN.
Alderaan is so beautiful, but for what? To just get destroyed. ☹
Obi-Wan's voice breaking as he talks abt the things Leia inherited from her bio parents.
"Both were exceptional people." 🤡🤡🤡
I am so sad. We coulda had so much. If Obi-Wan had just killed Anakin during Order 66, we coulda had Uncle Obi visiting Leia in Alderaan and going on adventures with her. No sad goodbyes. More Alderaan. More uncle/grandpa-niece/granddaughter shenanigans. But nO.
Sad parting hugs. AGAIN.
And Obi's just soaking it up cuz he knows this might well be the last time he sees her. Life is pain.
No. Don't let go. Of her baby hand.
Omg it's the outfit from the comics YESSS. That and the teal outfit are my fave.
He leavin' the cave 😔
Owen looking suspicious, but not as suspicious as usual .
"Take good care of him." Like they haven't been for years. Like they didn't just throw hands with an Inquisitor. Bitch STFU.
Owen doesn't like Obi-Wan. But he knows just how much that boy means to Obi-Wan. He's the son of the boy Obi-Wan himself raised. So he gives in begrudgingly and actually smiles at Obi-Wan. "BEN! You wanna meet him?" Owen Lars. What a man.
Baby Luke immediately starts smiling at him 😭😭😭
HELLO THERE
Really liking Obi's new fit.
Bro, the moment I saw Qui-Gon's blue behind HOLY FUCK. CHILLS. I had to pause and scream into my hands and get up and jump around my room. The adrenaline was too much.
And then he turned around and everything went to shit. They spent the entire budget on TBOBF on a fucking perfect-looking deepfake Luke but here we are with 40-yr-old padawan Anakin, AOTC Obi-Wan just aged up a bit, and Qui-Gon who doesn't even look like Qui-Gon. They couldn't age ANY of them down a little???
Before I bitch abt Qui-Gon, does anyone remember Liam Neeson denying being in this series?? He pulled the same thing as McGregor but that bastard not only said they couldn't afford him, but also pretended to not know abt anything going on w Star Wars rn. He literally went do ppl still like Star Wars? As if he never heard of the sequels or oh idk baby yoda??? Played a bit too dumb honey.
Anyway, back to Qui-Gon bashing. This man. Bitch sees his son for the first time in 23 years and the first thing he says is took you long enough?? No greeting, no smile, no reassurance, comfort or an apology, nothing. Bitch ditched his son with the weight of the world on his shoulders, and now after years of that same son desperately calling out to him he responds, saying Obi-Wan's the one who wasn't ready to see him. Bruh. What a fucking bitch. Srsly Qui-Gon? WTAF.
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dykecostanza · 2 years
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here’s my serious question: how bad does disney have to fuck up before fans who mindlessly love the star wars brand acknowledge this shit sucks? bc if you still honestly believe the obi wan show is good you’re either lying to yourself or decades of marvel/disney products being passed off for creativity and storytelling have rotted out your brain completely lmao
it would have been unbelievably simple for an entertainment conglomerate with more $ than god to do a character study on a traumatized obi wan directly after the events of episode 3 - he’s struggling to accept anakin’s fall, padme’s death, and the effective genocide of the jedi, he sees anakin everywhere in flashbacks and visions (giving hayden an opportunity to return and really flesh out their relationship w/o the burden of george’s goofy dialogue), he’s working to commune with qui gon but receiving no response which makes him feel even more jaded and hopeless, he’s trying to train to protect luke but he keeps hitting the wall of his own trauma bc he sees so much of anakin in him, and the “journey” is him coming to terms with what’s happened before learning anakin has become vader at the end of the series which reignites his passion to stop him and defend the galaxy - they couldve even done a parallel where obi wan is coming back to “the light” while anakin falls deeper into the dark side
this show wouldve been extremely cheap to make, a chance for the flaws of the prequels to be “redeemed,” a good example of fan service, and something different from the endless grey slog of soulless spin-offs disneys been churning out the last couple years but bc theyre literally incapable of pursuing anything with creative or emotional sincerity and seem to either hate star wars or just radically misunderstand it we got the absolute pile of shit that is obi wan kenobi and all the pathetic disney bootlicking that goes with it
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Text
【INTRO POST】
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Howdy-loo, there!
Welcome to 【the pigpen】, where yours truly swoons over some of the worst of the worst!
[follows from offbeat-the-clownlord] | [kin list if you’re interested lmao]
Names: Clownlord/Clownie (reference to main blog/previous url), Piggy, Billy, Keaton, or Ash. :o)
Identities: Genderfluid/Transsexual, Gay/nblm. 【extras & pronouns】
Current Pronouns: Hye/Hymn/Hymns/Hymnself, Lamb/Lambs/Lambself, It/Its, Mutt/Mutts/Muttself, Snow/Snows/Snowself, Teeth/Teeths/Toothself, 🦷/🦷s, ❄️/❄️s
Interests: Horror, Batman, film, fashion, music.
Mutuals!!: @canongf​ @captainscyarika​ @ghostlyvenus-selfships​ @knightfallships​ @void-selfships​ @sweet-tea-records​​
Talking Tag: clownie talks/clownie rambles -> piggy oinks/piggy rambles
More likely to respond to comments/answer asks than DMs!
STANDARD DNI [no pro/shi/ppers, bigots, rpf writers/supporters (I’d also lump fanfic about caricatures (i.e. JFK C/lon/e H/igh or Ha/mil/ton) into this group), AOT fans, will add more for clarity if needed...] | Specifics: Sp*deypool shippers (To clarify, I know the age gap is better in the comics than the MCU, I’m just not big on people who ship it following me...), Joker/H*rley shippers (Obviously), if we share any of the non-sharing indicated f/os.
My f/o list is Huge, so below the cut is just a selection of who all I’d say you’ll see the most content for on this blog! Don’t be surprised if I randomly post about someone who’s not on the visible list though. ;o)
【key】: bold = I’m not comfortable sharing this f/o | italics = Ask before following if we share this f/o | ✨ = Comfort Character, always willing to talk about them | 💗 = Main | 💞 = Secondary | 💝 = Tertiary | 🏡 = Familial | 🌻 = Platonic | 💟 = QPP
【structure】: [f/o name] [source] | [relationship status or type] [marriage or engagement date if applicable] | [tag] [previous tag if applicable]
✨ 💗 The Joker [DC Comics] | Married (12•04•21) | 🃏A Joker and His Ace🃏
✨ 💗 Wade Wilson/Deadpool [MARVEL Comics] | Married (07•12•22) | 💣Bulletproof Boys💣
✨ 💗 Jack Torrance [The Shining] | Married (12•31•22) | 🪓Darling - Light of My Life🪓
✨ 💗 Charles “Chucky” Lee Ray [Child’s Play franchise] | Married (03•19•20) | 🌈Foul-Mouthed Little Fucker🌈 [💒Dollfriends💒]
✨ 💗 Betelgeuse [Beetlejuice] | Married (10•01•20) | 🪲Two Bugs in A Rug🪲 [🐞Two Bugs in A Rug🐞]
💞 Daniel Robitaille/Candyman [Candyman 1992] | Dating | 🐝Daniel is Orange🐝
💞 Tony Stark [MCU] | Engaged (11•08•22) | Tag: ⚙️Empire State of Mind⚙️
💞 Michael Myers [Halloween franchise] | Dating | 🔪The Night He Came Home🎃 [⚰️Buried Alive⚰️]
💞 John Kramer [Saw franchise] | Dating | 🧩The Missing Pieces🧩
💞 Egon Spengler [Ghostbusters] | Dating | 👓Spengler Time With Me👓
💞 Peter Venkman [Ghostbusters] | Dating | 👻You Talk a Lot of Shit (For Someone That Can’t Talk)👻
💞 Ashley J. Williams [The Evil Dead franchise] | Dating | 🍂Good. Bad. He’s The Guy With My Heart.🍂 [🏕️B-Movie Queens / That’s What We Are🏕️]
💞 Billy Lenz [Black Christmas 1974] | Dating | ☎️Waiting By The Phone☎️ [🎄Ick!🎄]
💞 Dr. Otto Octavius [Spider-Man 2 (2004)] | Dating | 🐙6 Arms to Hold You Tight / Does That Make You an Insect???🐙
💞 Anton Chigurh [No Country For Old Men] | Dating | 🐮Sugar Bully🐮
💝 Hannibal [NBC’s Hannibal] | Dating | 🍽️Ella et Porcus🍽️ [🍷Sapere Aude🍷]
💝 The Medic/Dr. Ludwig [TF2]  | Married (08•03•22) | 💉I Need A Doctor (Ohh!~)💉
💝 The Heavy [TF2] | Married (04•15•22) | 🥪Toll & Smol🥪
💝 The Spy [TF2] |  Married (01•22•22) | 🕵️‍♂️Mes Affections ne sont pas Un Masque🚬
💝 Sweeney Todd [Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street] | Married (08•19•21) | 💈I Will Learn to Love Again💈
💝 Spamton G Spamton [Deltarune] | Dating | 📞MORE PERSISTENT THAN A [Pop-up Ad]📉
💝 Dr. Frank-n-Furter [Rocky Horror Picture Show] | Dating | 👠Material Girl👠
💝 Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader [Star Wars] | Dating | 🖤Courage Dear Heart🖤 [🖤Shadowed Love🖤]
💝 Scott Pilgrim & Ramona Flowers [The Scott Pilgrim comics] | Dating | ❗Multiplayer❗
💝 Herbert West [Re-Animator] | Dating | 💚Love Is Nothing More Than a Chemical Scam (Will You Stay by My Side?)💚
🏡 Pamela Voorhees [Friday the 13th] | Adoptive Mother | 🧸Mama Voorhees🧸 [🧸]
🏡 Jason Voorhees [Friday the 13th] | Adoptive Brother | 🧸Jason🧸 [🧸]
🏡 Morticia Addams [The Addams Family] | Adoptive Mother | 🥀Black Is Such a Happy Colour🥀 [🥀]
🏡 Gomez Addams [The Addams Family] | Adoptive Father | 🤺Either Way What Bliss🤺 [🤺]
🏡 Wednesday Addams [The Addams Family] | Adoptive Sister | ☠️Poison Sister☠️ [☠️]
🏡 Pugsley Addams [The Addams Family] | Adoptive Brother | 🧨Explosive Brother🧨 [🧨]
🏡 Fester Addams [The Addams Family] | Adoptive Uncle | 💡Uncle Fester💡 [💡]
🏡 Addams “catch-all” tag: 🕷️*Snap Snap!*🕷️ [ 🕷️]
🏡 The Sawyer Brothers [The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Pt. 1 & 2] | Cousins | 🍖Sawyer Family Shenanigans🍖
🏡 Glen & Glenda Ray [Child’s Play franchise] | Step-kids | 🎸Rebel & Rhinestone🎀
🏡 J. Jonah Jameson [Raimiverse Spider-Man] | Uncle | 🗞️
🏡 Queen [Deltarune] | Adoptive Mom | 💾C0mput3r M0m👑
🏡 Susie [Deltarune] | Adoptive Daughter | 🪓Axe Daughter💪
🌻 Tiffany Ray-Valentine [Child’s Play franchise] | 👰Living Dead Girl👰
🌻 Barbra & Adam Maitland [Beetlejuice] | 🌻👻 [🌻]
🌻 Peter Parker [MCU & Raimiverse] | 🕸️Spiderboy🕸️
🌻 Nellie Lovett [Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street] | 🥧Try It! (You Might Like It)🥧
🌻 TF2 Mercs [TF2] | 💰Mercs of A Feather💰
🌻 Wallace Wells [Scott Pilgrim comics] | 🍸Tequila!🍸
💟 Ray Stantz [Ghostbusters] | ❤️Heart of The Ghostbusters❤️
💟 Winston Zeddemore [Ghostbusters] | 🌃Everyman’s Man🌃
💟 The Demoman [TF2] | 🍻The Cyclops & The Pig🍻 [🍻The Cyclops & The Clown🍻]
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kenobster · 7 months
Note
I haven’t seen you post anything on ao3 since July, did I miss something??? (referring to your zero notes zero kudos post)
No, you didn't miss anything on my ao3. I've just been going through an Anakin whump phase on my tumblr lately (with answers to asks and miscellaneous posts and fanart -- some of which I already deleted when they got 0 notes, including a fanart I posted today. So even if you go looking, you wouldn't find all of them). So because of that, whether or not it's true, it personally feels like ppl aren't interested in certain things I'm excited about (tho the like.... three or four people who have shown interest, tyvm). And I'm really grateful to everyone who has read my fics on ao3. If I didn't have that huge bewildering amount of support to fall back on, I'm sure I'd be a lot worse off. So I greatly appreciate that. And at the very least, if all else fails, my mom will show support for all of my posts/fanart/fics lmao. Anyway, so I'm well aware lots of ppl dont have those things to rely on, so I'm hella not trying to take them for granted. ❤️ I'm very grateful and feel very lucky that so many people have said such kind and heartfelt things about my writing.
But there are certain things I still carry a lot of shame for liking. No one could ever make me feel ashamed about 5PE, but my biggest dream is to one day draw Anakin dubconnishly sucking Palpatine's dick. And my favorite fic universe to fantasize abt rn is the Vader Mpreg one. And those are things I do feel ashamed for liking at times. So when those are the things I post (currently on tumblr) that get 0 attention (esp when other things are getting attention), it sorta starts to reinforce the shame I'm already feeling.
Like, I spent 8 hours yesterday drawing that fanart I posted (which I deleted a few minutes ago). I skipped dinner and stayed late at work for 2 hours on Friday to finish writing this post on my work computer (bc my personal pc crashes if i try to make tumblr posts). Did I make either post to get notes? No. It was fun for me. Just the process of it was fun for me. I enjoyed myself so much!!! Totally worth it.
But do I regret posting them publicly instead of just keeping them for myself and my friends? ... Honestly, yeah, I kinda do.
Probably people did like the posts but are afraid to be seen liking things so dark and deranged. And like, that's okay, because I'm brave, I'm super brave, and I will be the first to post any deranged content out of any group of people. But I have limits, too. And if people are willing to read 5PE or shadow AU but not willing to read about Vader's uterus, then I start to feel less brave. :/ And I start to become demoralized over other things too.
Like, I was set to post chapter 10 of 5PE this weekend, but I haven't been able to work on it. Every Shadow, being less dark, is even harder to work on. Because if my perception is that ppl find me sick and grotesque and deranged for my most fucked up ideas (that's my perception, not necessarily reality), then it hurts to have my tamer content be supported instead.
Is that fair to yall? No, not at all. Am I trying to guilt trip anyone? Absolutely not. It's just a current unfortunate reality that's bumming me out, and there's not much anyone can do to change it. I just gotta let the feelings run their course.
Anyway thanks for reaching out anon. I feel better having been able to air all of this. Though I'll probably still step away to some extent (how long? who knows. The depressive episode will decide. But prob not for that long.
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intermundia · 2 years
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Hi! Love your blog! I just wanted to ask do you have any Anakin/Darth Vader comic recommendations? Especially ones that are kind of a character study. Thanks ahead of time!
ooooooooooh! good question. i have to say that i have been extremely impressed by the marvel darth vader comics, gillen and larroca's darth vader (2015-2016) run is famously very good, set between ep. 4 and 5, vader discovers luke is his son and we get to see a bit inside the machinations of imperials. in the last arc 'end of games' he has a vision where he kills both obi-wan and his younger self (#24) and is very worth a read!!
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the 2015 run also includes the story arc 'vader down,' a six-issue crossover, which i found very memorable like the panel below lives in my mind lol
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soule's (2017-2018) run is also very great, set shortly after ep.3 during the jedi purge, you get to see him bleeding a lightsaber crystal (has a vision that includes obi-wan), then a really powerful arc about building his fortress on mustafar and going on a dark side journey to try to get padmé back.
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the 'bad ground' issue #18 is also a personal fav bc he asks tarkin to hunt him for sport lmao and so we get to see him through tarkin's eyes and tarkin has a very uhhh interesting perspective on him lol and it's fun to see how badly it goes for him.
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the new run of pak's (2020-) is pretty good too, it's set between ep.5 and 6, so he knows about luke and goes to naboo to investigate, etc, so the emperor fucks him up pretty bad for getting soft lmao, but it's also kinda about building lore to explain the events of rise of skywalker (e.g. how the fuck were there so many star destroyers with planet killing kyber, etc) so that part is kinda meh to me, but vader is a badass and that is very fun.
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so lkasfkljsd i guess my advice is that the marvel darth vader stuff is worth checking out. in terms of older, dark horse comics, the legends version of what happened after ep.3 is pretty good in purge (2005). he's kinda on a killing spree and looking for obi-wan which you know. is a good thing to read lol and then darth vader and the cry of shadows (2013) includes content that will haunt your nightmares:
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tldr; it's kinda hard to go wrong with vader in the comics haha they really don’t shy away from making him a monster but also dig into his character in ways that before the kenobi show we just didn’t see on screen
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hunters-heathen · 2 years
Note
how did you feel about the obi wan kenobi finale!!!! id love to hear ur thoughts
Let me tell you, it’s been several days (I think? Time isn’t real) and I still can’t even begin to compose my thoughts into something articulate
So instead I leave you with how I felt the entire time while watching:
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Okay I lied here’s a chaotic list
Vader Vader Vader Vader Vader supremacy 🧎🏻‍♀️
I lost my marbles when Ben did his ~pose~
ThEn YoU WiLl dIe (plz just tear my heart out miss Chow)
^ he threw his whole Vadussy into that fight fr
^ he threw his whole Vadussy into that fight fr
Can we talk about how despite knowing they both live I was literally so tense the entire duel
BERU SUPREMACY she pulled out those guns and Owen said 😳 lmfaooo as you should king, she’s the top fr
^ I have a weird thing for the slight roughness/gravel in Owen’s voice though bye-
Also no freaking high ground comment??? Bye pt. 2
Vader literally getting pummeled with rocks I-
Vader wheezing
The way Anakin shown through and his face was lit with blue but then Vader came back & it was red
^ adding onto that I saw someone say how Ben had to watch his eyes turn Sith all over again and now I’m crying
^ adding onto that x2: saw comparisons about how Ahsoka opened the right, Ben opened the left, but only Luke could lift the helmet off completely and I have not stopped thinking about that since
I am not your failure, Obi-Wan
^ that’s it that’s the tweet
Then my friend is truly dead 🥲🥲🥲
Leia and Ben reunion 🥲 also I’m tired of him calling himself old / other ppl calling him that lmao (smash)
^ btw I LOVE Alderaan I wanna live there okay
I just think… I miss Padmé Amidala so much (Ben compared Leia to her parents and a homie was ~sobbing~)
Lowkey I wanted a Padmé grave visit by Vader but okay-
Also wish there were more clone wars flashbacks maybe? But I’m not one to complain, the duel flashback was far beyond what I expected ✨ plus perhaps we will get clone wars flashbacks in Ahsoka (this is really Hayden’s year, go king)
I lowkey wish Reva did have a villain arc of some sort but I’m glad they didn’t just kill her off. Mayhaps a spin-off is in order
^ on that note I’d also love to have a Vader spinoff. Or two. Or five thousand. There’s so much to do with him
Qui-Gon FREAKING JINN 🗣 love him but also all I could think about was the bts pics of Liam Neeson dressed as Qui-Gon under that umbrella lmao bye
Oh- THE BOYS HOLDING HANDS WHILE DUELING- 🗣🤌🏼
I like how Ben’s outfit at the end was like one of the ones from the comics
HELLO THERE
There’s been a lot of talk about Ben & Anakin being dyads bc of what was presented in the show and lowkey I’d be here for it
^ I think it’s an amazing and fascinating concept that wasn’t super properly touched on in the sequels so it’d be neat to see it again somewhere else as well
Ummm all I have to say in conclusion is that this show tore my heart out SO much and I literally cannot believe it’s already over. Hayden was incredible, Ewan was incredible, Vivian and Moses were incredible, ugh- I’m in love. Some shows I watch and then I’m like ‘okay I don’t think I need to revisit this’ but I’ve already watched the finale like 5 times (literally even just as background while I’m reading or something) so I’ll definitely be revisiting it
Some things could’ve been executed better, mostly the pacing and also some of the action scenes (let’s be real the Leia chase was ridiculous fkfkfk) but overall it’s been a wonderful ride and I really really am hoping for a season two or something of the sort. I’m simply not ready to let Ben go yet ✨
^^^^^ I know I have so much more to say but literally my head is so chaotic rn so this is all you’re getting 💀
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