did you know that every time someone says my writing rewired their brain chemistry it temporarily heals me of all my woes? replenishes my life force? acts as a barrier between me and the Horrors?
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god the farcille flashback made me cry this episode and I'm still tearing up just thinkin about it ugh I'm so happy this anime is turning out to exceed all my hopes and dreams for an anime adaptation
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There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.
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I think you guys broke her
It's been a rough last couple of years, but it's nice to be back! We missed you guys too!
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oh right i forgot the real reason i stopped listening to broadway clips was that i've got this whole enormous miserable knot in my chest abt having been too socially anxious to do anything with my once-upon-a-time-very-gorgeous voice once i got spat out of the safe little nest of my high school, and like, most of the time i forget that knot even exists, but when i listen to the sort of music i used to be part of making (proper opera but also showtunes) it's like. this whole fast-forward feelings journey thru 'oh right that didn't actually go away, it's still right there in my throat, just calcified' to 'oh okay we tugged the loose end and it's unraveling and actually it was keeping contained a whole rush of tears like aeolus' bag of winds in the odyssey…'
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not to be norwegian on main, but i just found out the norwegian advent calendar tv series jul i blåfjell is airing again for the first time in 11 years, and they made it available to watch internationally, and i literally screamed in the car
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Me: *Scrolls through Ao3 for new stories, ignoring the 898234870 tabs of fanfic I've got open*
Me: Gosh, I can't find a story that has what I'm looking for in this horrible horrible world of boredom
Brain: What if we write the one we wish was written?
Me: Oh! I like how you think
Five minutes later
Me: *staring into the ceiling as I imagine the fic but not actually writing it and probably never will*
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i'm fixating on spy x family which means using it for au fodder for my own stories and i'm soooo unwell thinking about a wdnftp au where loreleaf is anya. like, i want the parental figures to be doli + tomi but i can't imagine them meeting that late in life, tomi has to be there already somewhere. doli & stormy might be good too but again, i think it works better if stormy is still his found sister. so...... really the best fit for yor is jademoon?? who canonically hates doli lin's guts. but in this au they can just be vaguely antagonistic parental rivals who still bond over parenting their weird little kid who is still psychic but also sometimes just sets things on fire with his mind. in this au i think jademoon has to be like an underworld doctor not an assassin which is slightly less cool but i think she can pull it off and she can still teach loreleaf how to punch
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