#listen if i was mean to your fave on here there is a good chance i actually love them
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Garreg Mach students ranked by how popular their tumblr blog would be, from least to most
Popularity is measured not only by follower count, but also their general notoriaty in the tumblr dot hell ecosystem.
Ashen wolves sadly excluded because this list is long enough and I wish to see the sun again sometime today.
24. Leonie
I say this with a mind free of judgement and a heart full of love, but Leonie is a Facebook user. She doesn't really get tumblr, since for her social media is mainly to keep up with her people back in Sauin village, and you can not tell me that a community of mainly hunters uses anything other than Facebook to show off their latest game.
Most popular post: Her introduction post. Liked by Byleth and Byleth only.
23. Dimitri
He uses his tumblr as a personal vent blog whenever he is having a Mental Health Moment™ and deletes everything he posted the day later. He sits on an ask box full of concerned anons he can't bring himself to either acknowledge or delete.
Most popular post: His posts get liked in the """"traumacore"""" space but since he immediately deletes them it's hard to gaige exact metrics.
22. Hubert
You fool! He has 70 alternative accounts! And he uses all of them to send anon hate to his enemies and publish callout posts on those who seek to oppose Lady Edelgard.
Most popular post: "Lord Varley is a terrible person that deserves to be deplatformed and beheaded and here's why"
21. Ashe
His tumblr is for things he personally enjoys, he doesn't really post much original content. He reblogs from Bernadetta and Ferdinand and every single credible gofundme he can get his fingers on.
Most popular post: That time Felix baited him into a lengthy argument over the ethics of shoplifting.
20. Raphael
Reblogs warriormale like it's his god damn job. Occaisonally posts workout videos too, but for some reason Ignatz is REALLY bad at getting the camera to focus whenever Raphael is on screen.
Most popular post: Raphael was very enthusiastic about warriormale's drop that towel!!! post, much to the amusement of many immature people online.
19. Petra
Petra has a travel blog, mostly to document her experiences in Fódlan and get her into the habit of writing in her second language. It's mostly for her own sake, so she isn't fussed about getting followers.
Most popular post: A video titled "Me and my best girl friend at the beach". Every single one of the notes are a variation of "girl is that Dorothea Arnault 👀👀👀". She never confirms or denies this and her next update is about her catching the cold for the fifth time this year.
18. Linhardt
No queue, no tags, no system, Linhardt posts whatever holds his interest. An absolute nightmare for the novice to follow, but students with a little bit of patience can unearth many a pirated textbook.
Most popular post: A masterlist of crestology textbooks. Reblog to save a student's life!
17. Ingrid
Mostly vaguely feminist theory and book recs. Sometimes extremely personal ventposting. People who know her irl pretend not to know it is her as to not make her uncomfortable.
Most popular post: That one time she got kungpowpenised on one of her more...problematiqué opinion pieces.
16. Lysithea
Okay folks hear me out - she totally has a super secret fandom blog. She pretends that it is for the sole purpose of pointing and laughing at fandom drama as she herself is above that fandom-brained nonsense, but Goddess have mercy on your sinful soul if you provoke her into sharing her hot takes.
Most popular post: A 14k word essay on disability in the warrior cats book series.
15. Annette
Annette also has a fandom blog, but shame? Not on her good christian site. She takes great pains to keep her blog a space of positivity and unabashed joy in being cringe. In all honesty, it feels a bit like falling through a time portal into pre-dashcon tumblr, and I say this with equal parts nostalgia and condemnation.
Most popular post: In this universe, she is the person that birthed the "my homophobic dad became an ally by watching Sherlock" fake tumblr story. It was a bit of wish fulfillment when she was younger, and it haunts her to this day.
14. Ferdinand
Writes mediocre poetry and reblogs scenery panoramas and history posts. Regularly has to fight accusations of being a tradcath blogger, and he fights them to the death.
Most popular post: A picture of him on horseback went semi-viral once, akin to the ridicoulusly handsome marathon runner.
13. Lorenz
Writes mediocre poetry and reblogs scenery panoramas and history posts. Is actually a tradcath. Alas, people live for the drama and Lorenz gives them no shortage of it.
Most popular post: That time Lorenz went defcon as he was accused of sneaking into women's dms to ask for feet pics. He vehemently, desperately denied being into feet.
12. Felix
Felix has been banned from every other platform but tumblr, and he uses it for PVP only. He's become infamous sitewite for always starting shit and getting into arguments, almost in the same vein as human pet guy, just a bit less horribly morally bankrupt.
Most popular post: A legendary colour-of-the-sky length feud with Sylvain that ends in Felix posting a screed that has become the next "what the fuck did you just fucking say about me" copypasta.
11. Marianne
Has one of these "is the animal media cute" blogs. She tries to stay nonjudgemental and positive, but something in these blogs just seems to make people go sicko mode - she has to block at least a dozen people every single day. Secret star of the blog is Dorte the horse.
Most popular post: A video of her singing happy birthday to Dorte. It wold probably have gone unnoticed if Hilda hadn't reblogged it to her ravenous audience who can't get enough of pretty girls.
10. Dedue
Is most active on youtube, but he still has a woodworking, cooking and gardening blog that attracts the most wholesome audience of old people. You know, the „great work, Dedue, it’s nice to see the younger generation still picking up these kinds of hobbies“ kind.
Most popular post: I feel like he’d dabble in the kind of „cooking hack debunking“ videos Ann Reardon does in our universe, because he respects the craft and doesn’t want young people getting hurt trying dangerous viral hacks.
9: Ignatz
If you’ve ever been on the internet at all, you’ve probably seen one of his artworks. Sadly, those artworks are probably reposts of reposts of reposts, and Ignatz is still struggling to make comissions – he is still to shy to just become a furry artist but give it a few months and he might not have a choice anymore.
Most popular post: A post begging tumblr users to reblog his art.
8. Dorothea Arnault
She absolutely could be in the top 3 of this list if she wanted to. She just ABSOLUTELY doesn't want to. She's incognito on this blog and, once you've dug your way through reblogged gofundme's of folks in need, you'd find that her content is mainly her singing in places you wouldn't expect great audio in - stairwells and basements, mostly. Sometimes, people will ask her "has anyone ever told you you sound like Dorothea Arnault?" and she'll answer "I don't know who that is, sounds like a bitch though".
Most popular post: Her blog really took off during the sea shanty stage of quarantine - in fact, her sapphic shanties might have kickstarted the era.
7. Sylvain
Hornyposts all day every day and still finds a way to get all up in everyone's business. Was determined to outlast the titty ban and by now, the algorithm as pretty much thrown up its hands and given up on him. Totally the kind of guy who reblogs nsfw pics or videos from other blogs with unwarranted commentary.
Most popular post: His legendary tiff with Felix, in which he pulled off smooth shark levels of playing dumb to piss off his opponent. The resulting mythic copypasta is now his bio.
6. Mercedes
Mercedes posts daily on her affirmations and positivity blog. Reminders to relax x muscle, unclench y joint, and afford yourself the same grace you afford others. She also gives advice to troubled anons, and it's not neccessarily good advice but it's nice to see someone sincerely cares. People somewhat parasocially call her the "tumblr mom".
Most popular post: Her coming out post where she announced she is bisexual.
5. Caspar
Okay this might be a hot take but i feel like Caspar is a tiktoker – detractors call him a thirst trap but honestly he doesn’t show off his abs to make money off of horny viewers, he shows them off cause he's proud and wants everyone to know about them. He reblogs all his stuff to tumblr because he knows Linhardt is most active (most being a relative term) there and Linhardt liking his new post is a highlight of his day.
Most popular post: He’s gone viral a few times with a genre of tiktoks tumblr would describe as this is what boys will be boys should mean. In this universe, he ist he originator oft he vine of a guy pushing his friend, who’s fallen asleep on an air matress, out into a lake.
4. Bernadetta
Has a gajillion sideblogs she can’t bring herself to part with – she lives in constant fear someone will discover her abandoned onceler sideblog. Her most popular blog is for writing reader insert fanfiction. Whenever her blog gains enough followers to make her feel nervous about posting, she drops off the face of the earth for a few months until her follower count has shrunken to a managable size.
Most popular post: shamefully, an 18+ onceler rp from the olden days.
3. Edelgard
Your one-stop shop for protest tactics, world news, guilt-trippy posts about today's calamity and what you can and MUST do about it, and organisation to donate time and money to.
Most popular post: So she let her guard down once, ONCE, and reblog a slew of topless buff woman gifs to main on accident, and tumblr still clowns on her for it.
2. Hilda
She may be an insta gal, but she took to tumblr like a duck to water. Yes, tumblr as a whole hates the idea of being sold things, but sometmies they are willing to make an exception if the girl selling things is a delightfully lazy and aggravatingly cute #girlboss.
Most popular post: Technically, it's a selfie with her tiddies almost out. What draws people to the post is Marianne in the background, clearly hypnotised, pouring a herself a nice cup of tea...into her lap.
1.Claude
You think he's a tumblr funnyman? Wrong. He's ALL the tumblr funnymen. He is gaud, he is pukicho, he is all the other's who's names I can't be arsed to look up. It began as him sockpuppeting on another account to set up a punchline to a shitpost, it snowballed from there and now he is roleplaying several different tumblr blogs with an incredible amount of dedication. Right now he is planning for two of his personas to stream a game simultaneously.
Most popular post: If you ask him, his most popular post has not been made yet, but it sits in his draft, just waiting for the day they pull the plug on tumblr, so he can end the charade and dramatically unmask himself at the last possible moment.
Bonus: Byleth
Reblogs every single post her students make. Regardless of theme. Regardless of content. Always reacting with a couple of emojis. Nobody is sure whether her blog is a bot or a real person, and scrolling through it the closest one could come to browsing r/all on tumblr.
She is, of course, not a bot, this is just the way she makes her unconditional support of her students known. Even if that means reblogging hardcore porn, an essay on the canonical treatment of Brightheart in The Prophecies Begin, more hardcore porn and a deeply personal account of trauma within seconds of each other.
#fire emblem#fire emblem 3 houses#listen if i was mean to your fave on here there is a good chance i actually love them#i am just shitposting#black eagles#blue lions#golden deer#fuck im not tagging every student in this if this is a 2 note post then so be it#fe3h
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you and me got a whole lotta history | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x historian!reader
y/n is a historian and it’s not her fault her bf’s job takes him all around the world…
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 102,561 others
location: melbourne 📍
yourusername: so it’s the australian grand prix and i’ve spent the start of the week exploring this old city. one of my stops was the historic old melbourne gaol. this now museum was once a prison that housed some of the most feared criminals in australian history. constructed in 1839, the old melbourne gaol saw 133 hanged for their crimes between 1845 and 1924. it was briefly used during world war two but ceased operation as a prison in 1924 and was renovated to be part of the RMIT university and the museum it is today. a definite must if you’re visiting melbourne !!
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user1: my fave part of the race week is y/n’s museum recommendations tbf
user2: i can vision charles being dragged around this place hating his life
charles_leclerc: the things we do for love
yourusername: you said you enjoyed it :(
charles_leclerc: I DID
user2: oops
yourusername: i’ll leave you at the hotel next time
charles_leclerc: it was scary but i enjoyed it because i was with you
yourusername: okay that’s better
danielricciardo: so my farm isn’t good enough for you
yourusername: noooooo danny i thought we were going after the race?
danielricciardo: oof my bad
user3: petition for there to be a teds notebook but it’s y/n giving us a historical guide to the city the race is in
f1: we’re listening @skysportsf1
charles_leclerc
liked by yourusername, scuderica ferrari and 788,341 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: tough race in melbourne but a beautiful city regardless
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user4: HE served, we don’t talk about the race
yourusername: i don’t mean to say i told you so but i did say our day trip would be the best part
user5: girl you’re gonna get banned from the ferrari garage
yourusername: they deserve far worse than what i’m saying let’s be real
user5: true
user6: i love how charles didn’t reply ferrari has his ass ON LOCK
carlossainz55: we'll come back stronger
danielricciardo: we can all commiserate at my farm bro
charles_leclerc: your farm better be as good as you're saying now
danielricciardo: nervously awaiting the y/n review
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 104,561 others
location: miami 📍
yourusername: though miami may be known for it's partying (it's all about the U), charles and i took our monday to take a stroll around st bernard de clairvaux church, one of miami's hidden gems. the church was originally built in spain all the way back in 1141 to the style of cistercian romanesque architecture for alfonso vii. the monastry's cloister was illegally purchased by american william randolph hearst in 1926 and in order for the church to be transported it was dismantled to 11,000 pieces and sent to the us where it was rebuilt and still stands to this day.
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user7: i'm never gonna be able to afford to go to miami so why did i read this whole thing like i'll visit some day?
yourusername: history is important and interesting, always good to read even if you never visit !!
user8: she's like the older sister i never had
user9: did charles enjoy this one more?
yourusername: "at least i'll get a tan here"
charles_leclerc: i feel like anyone who reads about me in your comments will think i'm an asshole, i have fun every time i just don't understand most of it
yourusername: i know you have fun baby (and i love you for driving us to all of these places)
user10: have you considered our super historic frat house this saturday night?
user11: imagine thinking you have a chance when her literal boyf is CHARLES LECLERC
user10: every goal has a goalkeeper doesn't mean you can't score
charles_leclerc: i will run you over
user12: omg ferrari's pr is quaking
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, lancestroll and 112,677 others
yourusername: it is my biggest honour to announce my position as a history lecturer here at oxford!! i always dreamed of studying here and to get to pass on my knowledge to those looking to follow in my footsteps is a huge pleasure and responsibility.
p.s. no worries, it is not full time so race week explorations will continue.
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user13: so it was true :(((((( wait i just read the whole post my bad
user14: so i guess i now need to turn my Cs into As if i wanna attend a y/n lecture
charles_leclerc: unbelievably proud of you my love - don't miss me too much
yourusername: you sure i can't persuade you to move to england with me :(
charles_leclerc: i'll be there as much as i can be but monaco is still our home
yourusername: always
landonorris: proud of you smarty pants
yourusername: thank you landito
landonorris: so you'll now root for the brits?
charles_leclerc: over my dead body
yourusername: what charlie said
charles_leclerc
liked by pierregasly, yourusername and 1,209,778 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: super happy for another win for the season but we keep pushing for the real prize at the end of the season - thank you for your continued support tifosi and my love y/n who stayed up all the way in oxford ❤️
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user20: i don't wanna jinx it but like the season is going well
user21: too well....
yourusername: winning looks good on you
charles_leclerc: you look better on me
pierregasly: oh god you've been apart for a triple header and now you're being horny on main
yourusername: says mr. doggy emoji
pierregasly: touche
user22: so charles can mathematically win in either austin or brazil FUCK THEM KIDS I NEED Y/N AT THESE RACES
user23: if she's not there for charles wdc i am personally going to have a sleepover on the train tracks
yourusername added to their story
yourusername
liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 503,786 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: the autodromo jose carlos pace is the crown jewel of the interlagos neighbourhood. the circuit opened 83 years ago and has hosted the f1 since 1972. the circuit was originally meant to be a housing area but due to the 1929 stock market crash the owners decided to construct a racing track instead. interlagos is often a season decider with fernando alonso winning both his 2005 and 2006 titles here, kimi raikkonen winning the 2007 championship here, lewis hamilton won the 2008 championship here, jenson button clinched the 2009 title here and CHARLES LECLERC WON HIS FIRST TITLE HERE IN INTERLAGOS FOR THE 2023 SEASON
on a real note i am so proud of you charles, i have seen the sacrifices you have made and the unbelievable amount of effort you pour into every facet of your racing NO ONE deserves this more than you. i am so grateful to have shared this moment with you, here's to many more xxx
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user26: i am unwell this is so fucking cute
user27: bro this is so fucking crazy
charles_leclerc: couldn't have done it without you, so glad you could be there for me xx
yourusername: always charlie xx
yourstudent: miss y/n you can cancel all of our lectures if charles wins the championship again FORZA FERRARI
charles_leclerc: the people have spoken
user28: insane butterfly effect of the wall street crash to charles leclerc 2023 wdc
user29: they make me believe in love
note: this was super random but popped into my head while at work and i knew i had to write it !! hope you enjoyed xx
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc instagram edit#charles leclerc instagram au#charles leclerc x you
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it takes a conscious effort to break your patterns of consumption and unlearn the notion beauty, interiority, diverse ways of existence aren't exclusive to whiteness or maleness. part of that isn't your fault. certain music is played on the radio, certain shows survive cancellation no matter what, certain people seem to be able to commit the worst possible acts against other human beings and are excused on account of their creative genius. others are selectively punished, with good reason sure, but still, selectively.
now more than ever it's easier to immerse yourself in art made by people outside of the mainstream. reading lists, free resources, playlists... all this stuff is more accessible than ever, but you've got to make an effort to give it a try. it's black history month, the recs are pouring in, go have a look. or take a chance on something absolutely no one has recommended anywhere and if you find something you like, rec it to someone else because the likelihood is they haven't heard of it.
tracy chapman's "fast car" is one of eleven songs that appears on her self-titled debut album. can you name the second hit single from it? if you're american and you fell anywhere left of center as of the 2016 election, it should be on the tip of your tongue if you were engaged in your country's politics at the time, regardless of your level of actual investment in the system. if not, the next time you're doing a task you need both hands with, washing the dishes, having dinner, doing your makeup, put that album on.
there's a post with over 100K notes on here that i see all the time of bruce springsteen and clarence clemons kissing. there's a part of that that is immediately meaningful to many if you're lgbtq, and a part that is harder for non-black lgbtq people to feel the weight of. but it is worth trying to do and was part of the reason why they kissed so often in the first place. clarence clemons was from norfolk, virginia. he released multiple albums outside of his work with the e street band. they may not be for you, but give them a try.
give enough music, or movies, or books that aren't a part of the approved canon a try, and there's no way you won't find something you don't feel as passionate about as you do about springsteen, siken, the beatles, what have you.
james baldwin was a prolific artist. see if you can't find something of his you like more than giovanni's room.
immerse yourself in ringo sheena, who mitski cites as one of her influences.
if you have difficulty paying attention to music you don't recognize, (i get it) make a playlist that alternates tracks you know and love with brand new tracks. start small. 5 faves of all time, 5 you're going to try out. you won't like everything, but you might find yourself looking forward to 6 songs instead of 5 eventually.
for movies, pick an actor whose performance you loved in something and explore their work. last year i picked whoopi goldberg, also a prolific artist, with a vast body of work that's pretty accessible as a result of her constant, intentional effort.
if you're an artist yourself, you can only stand to improve by getting to know your fellow artists better. so expand your notion of what art is. you can do it for free in lots of cases, and you're spending that time listening to music or reading or watching movies or series anyway, what have you got to lose?
anti-racism sometimes means engaging in real-world narratives of pain endured by brown and black people. that pain permeates much of our art, but we're just as three-dimensional as everybody else, and every aspect of our experiences come through in our work. you know that already, because what else is happening when you indulge in various genres. for everything you love or enjoy, there's a brown or black person who's doing something along those lines, in many cases, those genres wouldn't exist in their current form without the influence of our communities, some more than others, depending on where you're from. you can actually keep one foot inside your comfort zone and dip your toe into something else. that choice is both a joy and a luxury.
#im saying this with generosity#the best time to start was ten years ago the next best time is today#hope i don't regret this. lol.
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You’ve always been one of my fave writers, and I just have to know—in the “It was just one night” series we know Eddie keeps getting jealous of Steve—is that because it’s Steve? Or would he feel that way with anyone flirting with us?Especially in the early stages of pregnancy when it’s not too noticeable yet.
Hiiii babes!! Awe you’re so sweet😭 so in this series it doesn’t matter who it is flirting with you especially in the early stages, Eddie doesn’t like it😂 in his mind it’s because he doesn’t want random people around his baby even though it’s not born yet🙈 but I’ll happily give you some examples of how he handles other dudes flirting with you!💖
-find all things One Night Stand Eddie here✨
*Eddie is over seeing guys flirt with you while you’re about ten seconds away from punching him in the face*
“You have really pretty eyes.” “Thank you…so what movie did you need tickets for?” “Whatever movie you want to watch with me sweetheart.” “Dude..word of advice…she snores and chews with her mouth open…she’s like a damn pig at the water trough.” “Uh…you know what? I think I’m good on a movie right uhm…now.” “Eddie what the actual fuck?” “What? I just did you both a favor.” “How the hell was telling him I snore and eat like a pig at a trough doing me a favor?” “Because you’re pregnant and he never stood a chance.” “He stood a chance…he was cute.” “Okay but you’re still pregnant with my child and I don’t want my baby around that douche.” “You’re so annoying…what are you even doing here?” “It’s your lunch break…so I brought you some food.” “Oh…thanks.”
“Hey you know her?” “Huh? Who?” “That girl that’s with that kid at the pac man machine.” “Oh yeah I know her…I heard she just got out of prison.” “Prison? What…for? She looks so….” “Normal? Yeah that’s how she gets you…she lures you in with her looks and normalcy and then next thing you know you’re talking the last nap of your life and all your money is gone.” “Holy shit…” “yeah…wanna meet her? I’ll call her over here if you want?” “No no I’m uhm…I’m good.” “Whatever you say man…have a good night.” “Who was that you were talking to? He was looking at me like I was…crazy.” “Oh him? No clue don’t know him….here’s your water and Dustin you get three more quarters then we are out of here.” “I don’t like water…” “and I don’t care…now drink it.”
“Edward Munson I’m about to kick your fucking ass.” “Uh…why?” “You told Rick I was a high profile escort?” “Did I?…hmm don’t remember telling him that…I thought I told him you were a recovering kleptomaniac.” “What is wrong with you? Why are you running around Hawkins telling every dude in the city limits horrible lies about me?” “Uhm let’s be so fucking real with ourselves sweetheart you have a stealing problem so…that’s not a lie.” “I stole a shot glass from the hideout because I didn’t realize I still had it in my hand when you walked me out to your van…” “ah so you also have a drinking problem?” “I’m going to kill you one day…I just know it.” “Besides you don’t need all these gross dudes hitting on you…while you’re in this..condition.” “This condition? You mean knocked up with your baby?” “Yes…that’s exactly what I mean.” “News flash Edward I am just carrying your baby…we aren’t together so I can flirt and be flirted with by anyone I want okay?” “No…not okay…i don’t want my baby to listen to you flirt or be flirted with by a bunch of assholes.” “Why? It already listens to you talk…might as well add some variety in the voices of assholes it has to listen to.” “You wound me…now go drink some water and have a snack.” “Don’t tell me what to do jackass…” “yup that’s the mother of my child right there…the picture of niceness.”
#one night stand convos#eddie munson series#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson enemies to lovers#eddie munson x reader angst#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson social media au#eddie munson au#eddie munson x you fluff#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x pregnant!reader#eddie munson x fem!reader fluff#Eddie Munson#dad to be eddie munson#my little dungeon master baby
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I got tagged by @lynzishell, a sweet moot as well as a talented storyteller! Thank you, friend!
3 5 ships: Even 5 is not enough! Seriously. This list could easily have 20 entries.
Charlie and Indira by @cinamun. Let me tell you: that boy is so gorgeous and sweet- he's like a big devoted puppy. Dira doesn't want to be in a serious relationship, so I fear Charlie's days are numbered...
Atlas and Asher by @lynzishell. They're interesting and have depth. They're so good together (and hawt. Dawn and Phoenix are faves, too).
Kagame and Kise by @maxfaiden. I love this story so much- and the editing/layout/writing made me feel like I was reading an actual comic. It's lovely and the feels in it are *Mwaah!* chef's kiss.
Victor and Kian by @alinelie. These two give me all the feels. The impression I get is that Kian grounds Victor. Their pictures are always full of subtle emotion. I love them.
Mishka and Nikolai by @stargazer-sims. Sapphire is such a good writer, I bet her shopping lists are interesting. I love the development of their relationship and their dynamic. It's super sweet and tender.
Last song: Neon Blade by MoonDeity. I can't stop listening to this guy's music. And I don't even really care for phonk! "Wake Up!" and "One Chance" are pretty kickass, too.
Last film: I rewatched Constantin recently. I hear there is going to be a sequel?... I'm here for it.
Currently reading: About to start The Library of the Unwritten by A.J. Hackwith.
Currently craving: Sleep. I don't get enough of it and I have to get to bed by a reasonable time.
Fave color: Cobalt blue and crimson
Relationship status: Good!😉
Last Thing Googled: Origami. I suck at it. A flower? A frog? Doesn't matter! It all ends up in an angrily crumpled wad of paper.
Current obsession: Trying to get organized. My stories. Gideon and Sasha. Other folks' awesome simblrs.
Who am I tagging?? I liked what @lynzishell did: Creators listed above, consider yourself tagged. DID YOU GET THAT, @greighish? That means you, you, you! I'm also tagging @agena87, because this sounds like the thingie you tagged me for, but it has the relationships part! And also @simarcana, @lilamausmaus, @eljeebee, @damseljamsel, and @moonfromearth. Of course, this is all voluntary and won't go down on your permanent record. 🤖 Bleep bloop!
#tag games#there are so many more ships i want to include#these are some of the ones I have read/reread most recently#i had made plans to go to bed ten minutes ago#haha#nuuuuuuu!#gotta go to bed#night night
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No Light, No Light (One Shot)
A/N: Helloooooo agaaain, my lovely dears! It’s been a while, uh? Did ya miss me? I know i’ve missed you! I’m really sorry about the big unannounced hiatus, I just gotta say things happened and well, that’s life. Does that mean I’m back? Kinda, and let’s hope. Meanwhile, pls enjoy this little piece of work, inpired by my fave band F+TM and the song with the same title, go listen to it!! I hope you like it and as always, tell me what you think, come say hello, and update me on what’s been happening with y’all. Love you my dears!! Ive not forgotten about u!!
Lena Luthor x R//Word Count: 1,634
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There is a darkness inside of every person.
A darkness, so hidden and so deep, that once freed devastates everything in its path.
Darkness that turns gentle hands into steel claws and baby blue eyes into violent light, tinted in red.
You remember seeing it once before. A symbol of bravery and hope turning into the city's worst nightmare in the blink of an eye. All good deeds suddenly forgotten and replaced by immeasurable fear. Something you never imagined to ever live it in the flesh.
You wonder how long it has been nesting in her heart as she grabs you by the collar of your uniform and pins you against the wall, threatening to crush your ribs and squeeze your heart if she so desires. But you would be fooling yourself if you pretended not to know the answer.
That's when you think about her. Her green eyes, her playful smile, her soft touch. If these are to be your final moments, you may as well go with a hint of paradise in your mind, instead of the hell that rages behind those eyes.
"You really thought I wasn't going to notice you?" Kara holds your sniper gun with her other hand and smiles. "I could hear your heart beating since you arrived here."
Her hold on you gets a bit too tight for your liking and you hold onto her arm. Your mortal hands can't do anything against her grip and, while feeling your heartbeat hard against your ribcage, you silently course your tell-tale heart.
She moves her head closer to you, a predatory look in her eyes which glow red behind blue irises.
"You should have pulled the trigger when you had the chance." She closes her fingers around your gun, crushing it in half and tossing it to the floor.
She's right.
J'onn had tried to warn you and if Alex had known before she would have given the order too. Now there's no escape and you don't believe you have enough time for a miracle to happen.
"Yeah." You respond with a hoarse voice. "I should have."
By the expression in her face you know you should have regretted your words.
You shouldn't be playing. Daring her in a moment when the word friend has lost all meaning. Hell, you're not even sure if you were even friends to start with. Otherwise, you think, how could this be so easy for her? How could it had been so easy for her before?
The comms in your ear turn on without a warning and her voice it's the only thing that stops your mind from sinking into less grateful memories.
"(Y/N)?" Lena calls you, and you wish you could die with that sound echoing in your ears. Your name in her mouth, even with the evident concern, is the chorus of an angel.
It takes a second for that image to shatter as Kara hears it too and you can tell, by the smirk that her lips draw, she's going to enjoy what comes next. The alarms in your head go off, whatever she's planning, it's nothing good.
"Len-" You try to warn her but the pressure you felt a second ago crushing your chest is now threatening to squash your throat.
Kara's fingers are wrapped around your neck, pulling you up from below your jaw with enough force you have to stand on your toes. You have no other option but to strengthen your grip on her arm, that if you don't want to lose your head.
With her free hand, Kara reaches your ear and pulls your comms out to put them in her own ear.
"Hey, Lena."
On the other side Lena freezes, not expecting her to answer. It takes a moment to imagine the smirk on Kara's face. That smile she used to love, now twisted and dangerous like shark teeth, ready to draw blood.
"Kara, stop. Don't hurt her." Lena pleads.
"Hurt her? No, of course not. We're just talking." Kara turns to look at you, the smile still on her face as she takes the comms and moves them closer to you for a moment. "Wanna talk to your girlfriend?"
You want to scream.
"Sorry." Kara responds after watching you struggle with her hand constricting around your neck. "Seems like she can't talk right now."
"Kara, please, this isn't you. You were poisoned with red kryp-"
"This isn't me?" Kara cuts in. "Maybe this is who I've always been."
Fear comes crawling up your throat as she takes a step back and looks at you.
"I'm one of the most powerful beings on this earth and I had to make herself small for you, so you would accept me, love me. I've spent my life pleasing you just so I could get the scraps. Well, I'm sick of it." You see the moment realization dawns on her. "Maybe I just needed a little push to help me see it."
Her eyes suddenly ignite with a new light, like a spark at the end of a dynamite stick. It leaves you breathless, even more than her hand around your neck.
"Maybe that's what we all need."
You feel some relief as your feet finally touch the ground, letting you rest for moment before she stars to drag you like a ragdoll across the roof.
"I want it all, Lena, not just the scraps."
You're sure Lena is still trying to convince her she isn't like this. That she must stop whatever she's about to do and to please, please, not hurt you in any way. You also know it's of no use as you reach the edge of the building.
Kara lets go of your neck, and you stumble backwards. She grabs you once again by the collar and another playful smile appears on her face, delighting on your fear as you hold onto her for dear life.
By pure instinct, you turn your head right and left, trying to catch a glimpse of what is happening around. From the corner of your eye, you can see the chaos that reigns below in the streets. Down there, you can hear the sirens of police cars and ambulances rushing to help the people of National City.
There are little fires everywhere and no one can seem to put them out.
You remember the fight that caused it all, J'onn and Alex doing their best to keep the Girl of Steel at bay. You saw it all as you looked through your scope, waiting for their signal. When J'onn couldn't move anymore and Alex became paralyzed, not wanting to fight her own sister, you knew you should have moved your finger. Kara's words come to your mind, you should have pulled the trigger when you had the chance.
Now, it is too late for any of you. There's nothing left but the void of the fall that surely awaits once Kara is done with you.
"Poor Lena, always having to rescue you. I always wondered if she ever got tired of that." She raises a brow at you, taking your comms off her ear and finally tossing them to the ground. She doesn't need to listen to Lena now. "Wouldn't it be better if she didn't have to worry about you anymore?"
"She wouldn't worry if you weren't out your mind." You dare, trying to keep your voice from trembling.
"Out of my mind? No, (Y/N), I've never been as lucid as I am right now. I want what's best for Lena. Obviously that isn't you."
"You think it's you?"
"I know I am." The smirk comes back to her lips. "Otherwise, why would she have been with me when she was still with you?"
Rage breaks into you as you realize the meaning of her words. Your hands, wrapped around her arm, hold tighter.
"Oh, she never told you?" She scoffs, feeling like she has already conquered the world. "Then let me tell you, I think you deserve the truth."
The anger is visible in your features as Kara pulls you towards her, keeping you away from the edge just long enough to spill her bane.
"Remember our little mission in the North Pole? When Lena and I got stuck in the Fortress and you were so far away with the team that you couldn't reach us? Well, as you know, I was having a bit of trouble with my powers and while we waited for you, we had to find other ways to keep us warm. If you know what I mean."
Against your will, you remember.
You remember it all.
"I know."
Some of your anger fades. This is a battle you won't let her win.
"I've always known."
Your answer takes her by surprise.
Time stops for a moment, giving you two a second to really look into each other. No more lies, no more pretenses.
"After that mission, it was obvious. Lena never talked about it more than necessary and you avoided the conversation entirely. You couldn't even look me in the eyes."
How different those eyes were from the ones that look at you now.
"It was all the same to me."
The rest of the world fades as you look at each other and your revelation comes out of your lips.
"'Cause, in the end, Lena still chose me."
She chose me instead of you, you want to say.
You think about her once more. Her eyes, her smile, her touch. Her love. Kara frowns as the darkness comes creeping once again behind those baby blue eyes.
"And now she can choose better."
The void behind your back grows claws ready to pull you down, and the light fades as you feel that final push on your chest.
#lena luthor#lena luthor imagine#lena luthor imagines#lena luthor x reader#lena luthor x you#lena x you#lena x reader#supergirl imagine#kara danvers#red kryptonite#red k#one shot#no light no light
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it is once again bandcamp friday today (2nd february 2024)!! here are some albums i have been listening to lately that u shld check out
all of this is chance by lisa o'neill: album of the year 2023 Tbh. irish folk music my beloved. her voice is so so dear to me
in the furrows of common place by jim ghedi: i listen to a lot of english folk music so when i say this is the platonic ideal of english folk music i need you to know i Mean It. this sounds like standing atop the old quarry in my home town n looking out over the valley n feeling the wind in my bones.
twenty twenty twenty twenty one by spencer krug: speaking of bones, at any given moment "my muscles are fine / it's in my fucking bones" is probably running through my head
radium girls (curie eleison) by rachel sumner: this is a single but it's SO good. indie folk is NOT being killed by tiktok dammit listen to this six minute song about a true story and Feel Something
sister wives strike back by sister wife sex strike: speaking of artists u shld follow on tiktok. one day sister wife sex strike will post a cover album & i won't shut up about it for a month. anyway this is folk punk and i adore it. "sealed inside an airtight cage that doesn’t even lock, / the children underground, they learn to cry before they walk, / glass houses underestimate the power of a rock, / so tomorrow hand in hand away from omelas, we’ll walk"
covers by ghostdaughter: speaking of covers!! i am obsessed with ghostdaughter's voice. this has been the soundtrack to my walk to n from work for weeks
and as always go see if YOUR faves are on bandcamp
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as a folie a deux stan, would you share your thoughts & feelings about the album
A chance to ramble about one of my all-time faves?? ooOOO SAY LESS MY FRIEND ♥️🧸💛
I think Folie finding a place in my heart was a perfect storm — I’m a new fan falling into obsession with FOB during my mid-teens, and they’re starting to get into the hayday of the post-hiatus SR&R era. So of course, I’m looking through wiki pages, poking through fan pages, seeing interviews here and there (doing research for my sophomore year’s mandatory big research essay, and also satisfying my need to Know Everything™️ ), and I start wondering about how hiatus happened. What’s up with Folie? Why is it listed as not being well-received by fans and painful for the band (at that time)?
It becomes this situation where you’re handing 16-year-old me this misfit outcast album, one with bears on the cover (I’m predictable and easy to please shhhh) and an openly experimental vibe set apart from their previous work (more collaborative iirc, the four of them drawing on stuff they were inspired by to try new things). Pair that outcast magnetism (impulse to show love to wounded birds and rejected things) with lyrics that speak to the liminal space I existed in with my own adolescent identity (lyrics speaking to madness in complex dependent relationships, to not knowing yourself, to wanting to know yourself, to wanting to know the world, to trying to figure out morals and love and worth amidst your missteps and lost sense of self and unspeakable depression), and I was sunk. Listened to some YouTube video rip of the full album (or playlists that also included pavlove and lullabye) to fall asleep at night, while showering, really whenever I had a chance in my downtime (since I didn’t have headphones and listened to more of the futct/ioh/sr&r hit singles when with friends). Something about Pete’s devastating lyrical angst and Patrick/Joe/Andy’s artistry and the heavy feelings surrounding the album (from the minor bits the fans/public know about the time and the stories weaved throughout the album) started hitting in a specific way that had me imprinting on Folie and the band like a baby bird. Yeah, I started having that feeling of being understood by music with other bands (MCR, Paramore, P!atD, classic emo trinity stuff) along with some of the more pop punk stuff I was already into (PtV, ATL, you know the era), but for whatever reason, Folie maintained its place as my heart and soul album (along with Soul Punk for PStump-related reasons, but we’re not talking about her right now 🏃🏻♀️)
We’d be here all night if I tried to list favorite songs or lyrics, but I can ramble a bit about what hit me most when I started going “oh yeah, this is my album” as a teen:
I mean like, of course, right? “What a Catch, Donnie” is the pinnacle ballad, from all the lyrical callbacks and cameo features to the somber/hopeful music video, plus the interviews out there noting the song as lyrically important to the band. I think you can find stuff from back in that era (‘08-‘09) talking about it as almost a “swan song,” a final message that’s as close as you’ll get to personal convictions in a less-autobiographical album. For me, it felt like a love letter to their past selves in the unstoppable march forward in time. It felt like grief, the kind that comes with change and it’s inevitable losses, but it also felt like hope. Imagine not seeing goodness within you, not recognizing yourself, feeling stranded and pushed by the tides and not sure where you’ll end up. Then, imagine finding a lifeline through hanging on to someone else with the same type of stormy muddled mind, finding them and becoming their looking glass, their mirror, their guide — helping someone apathetic and listless find a spark again after giving up on themselves. It makes you wonder if you’ll find clarity through connection too, if you’ll be saved over and over again by people who see you and make sense of it all, or maybe don’t make it all better/comprehensible but care for you anyway. It became an anthem for me to hang onto my friends and budding new interests to help make me feel whole and keep going at a time where everything felt overwhelming and impossibly complicated (the curse of being 15/16/etc). Something about learning about hiatus, learning about the peaks and valleys of the band, looking at it all while having the fortune of knowing they find their ways back to each other to create more music and memories and get to keep growing together — that was big for me in a way I couldn’t articulate at the time but still felt deeply. We can be lost, but still found; flawed, but still loved. That’s important to hear when you’re stumbling through those early formative years, and important to be reminded of when we stumble through evolving our identities again and again and again.
There’s a lot of nostalgic love for the album now that I’ve held onto it for a decade, but it’s still so fun to revisit and holds up for me amidst all of the new music I listen to now. SM(f)S wriggled it’s way into my heart this past year and sits in there holding onto Folie’s hand, speaking on heavy themes and channeling that same motivation to experiment and create a legacy through music. Getting to see FOB live this year (!!!) playing Folie songs live (!!!!!) and eventually revisiting the whole album throughout the duration of tourdust (!!!!!!!) was an amazing experience, and it’s great to see Folie get her flowers in the many years since her release. Happy 15 years, Folie!! 🩵🐻💙
#folie a deux#late night catherine lore time#hold on let me just talk your ear off real quick <3#tldr: I just think she’s neat#unrelated side note: folie a bleu recolor is so pretty. like yeah the original deep reds are everything but BLUE!!!!#song stuff#I should probably have a FOB tag. since. y’know. I’m so casual chill normal about them#anyway#thanks for asking!#celesteeal
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question time :D
tagged by @buckitup 💘
1. were you named after anybody?
kind of! my grandad used to call my grandma “nina” as a nickname because “ni” means you and “na” means me in tamil and he was always like it’s you and me against the world so. as you can see i did not stand a single chance of not being the soppiest most hopeless romantic on this planet
2. when was the last time you cried?
northern attitude came on shuffle this morning and i thought about bobby nash for two (2) seconds and was like well here we go again
3. do you have kids?
nope!
4. do you use sarcasm a lot?
i don’t think so! im terrible at tone irl lol
5. what sports do you play/have you played?
football in school and…. i was a horse girl……. limited to a city but oh so enthusiastic
6. first thing you notice about someone?
ass for sure and i mean this so genuinely
7. eye colour?
very dark brown
8. scary movies or happy endings?
listen. scary movies can and should have happy endings. tell me why i was kicking my feet twirling my hair at the end of every single saw movie otherwise (saw franchise is my spiders georg. am actually a wuss. love a happy ending)
9. any special talents?
no! im good at opening jars and bottles. but just regular good not anything to write home about
10. where were you born?
india
11. what are your hobbies?
i like knitting but i haven’t done that in a while! idk i go to the movies i sometimes play cthulhu i think about writing fic and don’t actually write any
12. do you have pets?
there’s a family of feral cats on my back porch and unfortunately i’d die for them all. even sweet marie who is a huge bitch and hisses at me every morning
13. fave subject in school?
english! biology! went to this batshit school where in seventh grade we had a period called “tree study” and would spend an hour hanging out with a tree
14. dream job?
the million dollar question as i sit unemployed and unmoored in my parents house…… idk that post about flower shops was going around yesterday and i think i’d love to have a flower shop. real life maybe marine biologist….
tagging @zahlibeth @transboybuckley @sinistertolove @ice-sculptures @ringbearerjee @leothil if y’all feel like!!!
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your fall out buck post is awesome do you have any other thoughts on what music you think buck would listen to ?
for some reason my mind interpreted this as eddie not buck and by the time i noticed when you meant i had already compiled a list for eddie so you get both! under the cut because, as usual, this got pretty long.
also here is my fall out buck post if you haven't seen it :)
buck—
i think aside from fall out boy, he was very into green day up through his early twenties. he was 21 in 2013, so there's no way he didn't also go through an arctic monkeys moment, blasting flourescent adolescent in his earbuds all the time.
"flicking through a little book of sex tips / remember when the boys were all electric" was a lyric that'd get stuck in his head constantly as he bartended
also, the chance of buck not being an imagine dragons fan is zero.
i definitely also headcanon he had his white boy rap phase. i mean, c'mon, the guy was 26 in 2018. between 2016 (24) to 2018 (26) we had blond, coloring book, the life of pablo, starboy, damn, flower boy, astro world...you get it. and buck in LA during this time, going through the academy in southern california? yeah, he listened to drake.
i think he has his soft pop favs now. i think he's mostly past the rap, still listens to his pop punk music but more in a nostalgic sense. i do think current buck is a big fan of noah kahan, walk the moon (specifically what if nothing, though he found them through shut up and dance), some hozier, a good bit of sufjan stevens and phoebe bridgers on a sad song playlist he has set to private.
he's definitely the type to listen to one song on repeat for days, and i think that happened with some of the songs off melodrama by lorde to the point that they were his top songs on his spotify wrapped, even if she wasn't one of his top artists.
something about buck listening to supercut as he drives around LA late at night you know?
"cause in my head (in my head i do everything right) / when you call (when you call, i'll forgive and not fight)"
or
"i'll be your quiet afternoon crush / be your violent overnight rush / make you crazy over my touch / but it's just a supercut of us"
when he's pining for eddie??? come onnnnnn
eddie—
eddie listens to classic rock, country music, and has a spanish songs playlist sophia made titled "canciones favoritas" that he has downloaded on his spotify.
he loves pink floyd, i think he's a big eagles fan, no doubt in my mind he listened to a LOT of the beatles growing up, and if you think he doesn't know every word to rumours by fleetwood mac, you've got another thing coming. eddie hums rhiannon under his breath as he cooks, a gentle rhythm that fills up his kitchen.
(buck's a little bit in love with his voice, always tries to bug him into singing out loud, and usually ends with them duetting queen loud enough for christopher to complain from his bedroom.)
but he's also from texas! he's got his classic country faves, privately listened to dolly parton whenever the house was empty. definitely a big george strait, willie nelson, rascal flatts fan. loves a good carrie underwood song, and he'll say it's because of his sisters until the day he dies.
(it's really not. there's just something about female country that eddie loves.)
his favorite song, though, now that he's older and in love and a huge sap is still the one by shania twain.
"looks like we made it / look how far we've come my baby / might've took the long way / we knew we'd get there someday"
"you're still the one i run to / the one that i belong to / you're still the one i want for life / you're still the one that i love / the only one i dream of"
he plays it for buck one night and they slow dance in the living room and eddie feels more love in his body than he ever thought possible, thanks.
now, the spanish song playlist. it has a truly absurd amount of selena.
like.
so much selena.
also gloria estefan, celia cruz, and enrique inglesias' 1995 album that he used to hate as a teenager but that, admittedly, grew on him.
i've included this in a fic, but i stand by it. i think one of eddie's favorite songs is algo contigo by rita payés and elisabeth roma.
"what is missing is me telling you that I would die to have something with you / and it is that you have not given account of how much it costs me to be your friend / now I can not get close to your mouth without wanting it in a crazy way"
(^ the lyrics are in spanish but this an english translation)
also every time eddie listens to baila esta cumbia or bidi bidi bom bom he subconsciously starts dancing to it and the way he sways his hips drives buck crazy <3
okay i hope this is good!!! i've been thinking about eddie's a lot lately, i could probably do a more in depth lyric analysis like i did with my fall out buck post if anyone would be interested :)
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Hello 🥹 odd question but I’d really like to know your stance on this!
I worked for one Korean entertainment company where I interacted with some kpop artists including the boy group I was a big fan of back then multiple times (had professional and casual conversations with them, etc).
That being said, I did say ‘was’ meaning I don’t stan them anymore ;; And that’s not on them being bad or anything but after talking to them and just seeing them joking around with each member and like, just scrolling their phone during break time - just being normal (which is completely valid because idols are human!!) I just didn’t feel (?) the spark of wanting to stan them anymore or maybe I just felt weird that I was a fan of my co-workers (?) 🥹🥹🥹
I know I’m rambling but idk :’) If in the future, I was given a chance to work with enhypen, I don’t know if I would take it in case the emotions/feelings I get as a fan of enhypen would change or idk just dissipate like they did my previous group ;; I think if I were to only get to work with them once - it’d be okay because I don’t think they’ll remember after only meeting once 🥹 it’s another story if it were to happen a lot of times 😭
If you were put in that situation, would you take the chance to work with the boys? I’m genuinely curious! 🥺
Anyway! I really can’t wait for your sunghoon fic 🥹🩸Rest well and hope you feel better soon 🥺🤍
Ah, that's interesting.
I think it's pretty normal to work around celebrities and idols and realize that most of what fans see is a façade. After all, they are just people who do normal people things. I really don't think it's strange for the rose-colored glasses to come off upon seeing them in their own safe spaces.
I mean, i've met bands before (not k-pop mind you) and it made me completely stop listening to their music or looking at the members in any sort of way for various reasons. It's always a sad feeling to see who a person really is, but this is regarding weird behavior not normal behavior.
Scrolling phones and just being normal isn't necessarily something that would shatter my fantasies ngl. then again, i think it's good that you're not a super-stan working with these dudes. this is how we end up with malicious actions and the selling and stealing of personal items/information.
i'd actually advise against companies hiring stans of groups simply because there are a lot of things that can come of that. but if you're like me and able to be a casual stan upon being around said group (as in, not acting like a fucking weirdo towards them) then it would be fine ig??
if I ever got the chance to work with a band like enhypen, or any of my other fave groups, i think my feelings would change. i'd probably listen to them differently and view them differently due to a work relationship with them but I wouldn't necessarily stop enjoying them as a band. i'd probably stop writing fics tho because there's a huge difference between writing a character based on someone you've never met and writing about someone you'd come to know on a more personal level yknow? It would be too real at that point.
ofc, i would take any chance to meet the bands i love. i wouldn't go into it as a huge fan though. It would be a work thing, and the stanning would be secondary to how I speak with them.
im rambling a little bit but the point is, yes i believe my level of stannery would change after working with a band i love. but i don't think it would make me unstan. It would likely just have to happen for professional purposes.
After all, no one wants to work with someone that appears to be fucking obsessed with you, yknow? most people would be like "YES!!! THIS IS MY CHANCE TO FUCK [INSERT MEMBER HERE]" but my thought process would be more career driven i think??? like "omg this is gonna get my work out there!!!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!!!! RECOGNITION!!! THANKS HOT GUYS WHO I HAVE WRITTEN ABOUT IN DETAIL!!!"
no fr, id delete every fic of enhypen i've ever written. the embarrassment would be next level.
BUT YEAH
:D
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I really want to continue playing nb and the og obey me, but my main issue is the events that not only because they happen so often so you have to choose between story progression or getting the cool new thing! There is also the fact that unless you have time to grind and grind and grind, have money, and/or saved up a bunch of devil points there is little to no way to get what you want especially if it’s a cool card. Also the boxes piss me off cause I’ve been cheated out of a card so many times because of the boxes that I’ve just given up on the games.
Sorry for the rant I’m just really pissed I can’t play a game I like.
It's alright, I'm fine with ranting over this.
And I completely understand ya here and agree. The events are honestly too much, little breathing space in between, and they are becoming more stressful and draining by how much you have to grind in them. Especially for the CB events, which look to be becoming constant near month long events, but are so much more stressful. As well just chances to get what you want are near impossible. Unless you are very lucky in both the event, and if you try, summoning in Nightmares to get those needed cheat cards.
Yes, Lonely Devil is a thing now, but with these constant events, its hard to give LD a chance because it'll be a decision on using resources on LD, or the current new event, and of course as you mentioned, the main story lessons if they happen to release during those times.
Like its very clear, whether some players(devoted PTP solmare supporters) like to admit it or not, both og OM and NB have become very PTP only and anti-FTP with all the restrictions and all. Like if you really want to make real progress in the game, get all the rewards/cards you want, etc. You'll have to throw real money in for guarantee wins/gets. And I'm sorry to PTP players but your advice to FTP players is kinda pointless now. I've seen it given to others a couples time now to make things sound easy or possible through FTP means but in reality, it really isn't. Also the fact FTP players have to jump through many loops to get event a taste of good stuff compared to PTP players, is just ridiculous at this point to me.
So I completely understand ya for not being able to continue playing the game. Tbh, I want to drop it too, but just can't, it sadly has a hook on me, and I'm a FTP player. As well, my love for Asmo is just too much now. lol Yet, Solmare treats him so bad in these events/nightmares(I mean look at what happened to his bday event/nightmare).
If Solmare cared about their players, all types. I feel story battles should be very easy to beat, and more story driven focused than battles progression focused.
Also, don't run so many events during the times main story lessons drop? Yes, some say we can just take our time. That the main lessons will still be there, but they don't take into account if you don't read it on release it, you will be spoiled hard and that ruins it for many to keep playing.
Also Nightmares, should have better new cards got rates, and less annoying repeats. Especially for new special limited time Nightmares. I don't even know when we'll get revivals now, if we do....Which is why I feel so desperate to try to get my fave cards while I can. But my luck has been worse since their supposed increased gacha rates and I fear I won't get my Asmo again...
lol I started ranting myself here, so will end this before I go on too much.
I'm sorry Solmare driven you, and many players, away with their greedy and selfish changes and decisions. I can only hope they will listen finally and change/improve things for players but...I really doubt it now.
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my 2023.
yearly retrospective time LETZ GO!!!
last year i said 2022 sucked but uh,, 2023 was definitely worse :'o)
with the rise in queerphobic legistlation, school getting progressively harder to stay on track with, my dad dying, and just everything else that ive had to endure this year, its been difficult. but.. i somehow made it.
and you might be wondering how i got through everything. did i touch grass and magically everything was sunshine and rainbows? buy some overpriced self help book or online course that changed my life? No <3
i just,, did what i normally do. i played video games, talked with my friends, watched youtube, brainrotted over fandoms, listened to music, came up with cool outfits, somehow made it through skool, drew, wrote, cosplayed, roleplayed, made kandi and crafts, and just overall found ways to find joy in the small things, which goes a long way when youre trans in a world where your joy is an act of rebellion.
i also had some cool fandom moments this year! season 7 of siivagunner has been AWESOME, return to dream land deluxe was great even if it fricked with the lore a little, THE TOH FINALE WAS SO FRICKIN GOOD, marios madness may be my new fave fnf mod, NPMD THREW ME BACK INTO MY HATCHETFIELD FIXATION, i FINALLY got the kirby planet robobot soundtrack cd and the limited edition quiznos training game physical edition, i found ways to actually enjoy WDY again and leave behind itz toxic fandom, i got into pokepasta, tintn, gogos crazy bones, playtime with percy, inside job, tadc, i started listening to mal blum and against me and chonny jash, im currently being dragged into eggotama as we speak and im getting back into mpdsap,,
but the fandom that had the most impact for me this year was the june archive and restoration project. getting into TJA led me to discover bowlbys other works and get into one of the best fandoms ive ever been in, thanks in part to the june archive and restoration project fanserver. ive met so many cool people through that server, and getting to chat and VC with them has always been a blast. [yknow what? shoutout to all my friends that ive loved talking with all throughout 2023 yall are awesome]
back to life stuff for a moment here, i got to do a lotta cool stuff this year! i FINALLY homebrewed my 3ds [with a bit of help from jaco xd], GOT TO SEE THE HAUNTING OF NIGHT VALE LIVE, put together some awesome cosplays for gencon and halloween, im getting better at rhythm games, i got SECOND PLACE in my skoolz national cybersecurity codebreakers competition, i had an awesome bday, i went to go see barbie [my first movie in theaters since lockdown] and fnaf and both were AWESOME!! all of this despite everything thats happened in 2023!
and as for my creative projectz,, DIGIVERSE REBOOT EPISODE 3 FINALLY RELEASED BACK IN MAY!!!!!! holy frick i was SO PROUD of that,, in addition, ive been doing character reveals for gamerz epic megamix take, i created the doomed timelines awoken au, and ive strengthened my artstyle into what it is today while learning how to use my drawing tablet :3
in addition, getting into TJA and watching bowlbys animation legacy made me think about my past as a creator, and i started work on giving my old book ocs from my days in the TWOW fandom the care and attention they deserve, even if it means some slight redesigns or rewrites. speaking of TWOW, EWOW IS OUT AND IM GETTING BACK INTO TWOW AFTER YEARS!! feelz good to be back, and im hoping i can maybe properly host a minitwow at some point in 2024!
overall 2023 wasnt great, but i stayed silly and had fun despite it and i think thatz very swag of me!
now, every time i do one of these things, if i do an overconfident "bring it on" type message at the end i almost always end up regretting it, AND i am absolutely terrified about 2024 so i am not taking my chances!
so i leave u with this sentiment towards 2024 instead:
i gotta survive The Horrors anyway, might as well stay silly and do what i like while im doing it :3
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tnc: freefall full thoughts
(cross posted from elsewhere i'm just putting it here too lol)
before this album came out, sonically my fave txt albums are tdc: eternity, tcc: fight or escape (i really like loser lover and moa diary okay), and m2: thursday's child. and i think tnc: freefall is DEFINITELY up there -- idk where it ranks exactly but mannn it's so solid, i get why the critics at the preview were calling it a pivotal / turning point album for them. it does so many things musically yet stays thematically cohesive, the lyrics are lovely, and just feels like a natural evolution for them.
thoughts on each track:
growing pain - i can't believe i'm saying this but i think this track has a chance to dethrone opening sequence as my new favorite album opener (and opening sequence is one of my fave txt songs ever). but WOW i love rock txt!! i love how they pour their hearts out on rock tracks! listening to this right after farewell neverland is such a delight bc you have the contrast between making the decision to fall vs. ACTUALLY falling. and the latter HURTS. and they want you to feel that hurt in the song. i love going back to this track and jamming to it
chasing that feeling - oh this is just slathered in that 80s synthpop sound and i adore it so, the synths are just so catchy and i can't really describe it idk that sound just scratches the itch in my brain the right way. but something about it is such a gut punch?? there's something about "my fate, come and kiss me" and "maybe i'll miss it for good / the sweet mirage" that just GETS me. missing something so bad but knowing you have to move on from it... ugh!! not sure yet where i'd rank this among txt title tracks but man i do love listening to it.
back for more (txt ver) - this is the pre-release, we already heard and loved this one. honestly i like both the anitta version and this one, i feel like their second verses do different things: the anitta version keeps things interesting by changing it up, the txt version does that by escalating things. i.e. the former introduces elements of latin and funk while the latter enhances the nice disco pop stuff already going on. but yeah this one bops, also this song being third in the tracklist + right after ctf confirms to me that it's about wanting more of that neverland stuff even tho you said you would move on from it lol
dreamer - mmmm this song is so smooth!! i've seen a few people calling it the more mature / sexier version of 20cm but i still like 20cm more lol. but they both have a smooth r&b sound that makes you want to melt so i get it! it's a little bit lo-fi-esque which is a vibe that i enjoy and just adds to the smoothness of it, then we've got those lovely lovely falsettos. also wow the lyrics to this are really sweet? like... finding that dream you once held on to when you were younger and getting meaning from it once again. ohhh i melt
deep down - this one is boppy!! unfortunately it's a mid-2010s edm-pop type of song which is not a genre i particularly like, so i can't imagine listening to this one a lot. but for people who like that genre i think it works well! also it being a sequel song to crown is just. so cute. awww
happily ever after - aka happy fools' more melancholy older sibling HAHA. like deep down i can't imagine myself listening to this much, i think it needs a little more oomph to really capture me, but it's got a bittersweet mood to it and it conveys that mood pretty well.
skipping stones - I LOVE THIS ONE. this + growing pain are my faves of the newly introduced b-sides! it has that indie rock ost vibe that i'm weak for but it's also so warm, when i listen to it i want to turn the song into a real physical blanket i can wrap myself in. everyone sounds so good here and it's such a treat to listen to. and when i looked up the lyrics they made me melt!! "in order for the me from tomorrow to embrace the overwhelmed you of today, when it touches the shining waves, i'll hold your two shaking hands"??? STOP YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE ME CRY. i started smiling suddenly while listening to this that's just how warm it feels
blue spring - ok i already knew i would love this one bc i heard it live, but i thought the studio version would just be a cleaner-sounding version of the live one. but then THE ADDED ADLIBS??? THE HARMONIZING??? OH I'M SO EMOTIONAL. MY HEART SWELLS EVERY TIME I LISTEN TO THIS AAHH BLUE SPRING I LOVE YOU SO. that said i don't like that they removed the guitar strumming intro at the beginning and there's some weird autotune shit on some of hueningkai's adlibs. but i love this song as a whole too much for it to detract from my listening experience
do it like that - we all know this one too lol. i agree with all the people saying that it feels out of place on this album and they just stuck it on here cause it needed to go somewhere, but yeah it doesn't fit thematically. it's cute and fun but to me this song is musical candy: a sweet treat to listen to but not too substantial. it does what it does just fine but it's so jarring in this context
chasing that feeling (eng) - can i just say that i love the lyric choices here?? "in my kaleidoscope are pressed butterflies" and "time's a thief that keeps on stealing" and "hoping for twice in a lifetime, is that too much to ask?" and even short phrases like "a perpetual high." mmmm chef kiss. this and the korean version give off different vibes, the kor one is more conflicted / melancholy while the eng one is more wistful / determined. i love them both though
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Paubaya | bts
[BTS as the song PAUBAYA by Moira Dela Torre]
— Which part of my love wasn’t enough?
In which, you have to let go of the man you love when he’s in love with someone else
Word Count: 3,331
Content/s: be warned y’all; ANGST, falling out of love, falling in love with someone else, cheating, unrequited love, one-sided pining, fluff if you squint really really good and have blurred vision, saD, SAD HOURS
[masterlist] | more [reactions & headcannons]
A/N: Here comes the first song fic / headcannon thinggg!~ This song is back in my faves so I thought to write this little blurb bc i love angst 🤪💅
Paubaya in Filipino means “to entrust” or “to leave it to someone” which, in the concept of love, means that a person giving up the person they love to someone else
I recommend y’all to listen to the song!! IT’S SO ANGSTY AAAAAA and the music video is juST as heartbreaking (and there are eng translations provided too! Don't worry)
Also, I also tweaked some things I deem to be a more accurate translation. The Filipino language has gender neutral pronouns which is why I tweaked with the english translation from the mv itself instead of the he/him pronouns used \(￣︶￣*\))
ANYWAYS, I hope y’all enjoyed this /(ㄒoㄒ)/~~
KIM SEOKJIN
At kung masaya ka sa piling niya
So if you’re already happy with them,
Hindi ko na 'pipilit pa
I won’t force it anymore
“I want you to be happy, (Y/N).”
Such words were soft and well-meaning—as wholesome as the very man that said them—and yet they stab you in the heart all the same. How could it not?
An hour ago, your childhood best friend had invited you for lunch in one of the restaurants the two of you frequented in college. You had been excited at the thought of spending time with him, but this was definitely not the turn of events you had expected to happen.
“I think it’s time for you to really move on,” he smiles at you encouragingly.
Kim Seokjin’s rejecting you for the last time.
He made this clear when he showed you the ring he intended to propose with to his partner of three years. It was simple yet pretty, just what you imagine he’d get, and yet to know it wasn’t meant for you, it hurts like bitch.
While you were the reason they met in the first place, the selfish part of you has always held on to the possibility that fate might finally turn things in your favor. Those chances became slim when they got together, and while you had respected their relationship, that little devil in you still hoped they wouldn’t last.
Alas, your struggle with the unrequited pining never really ended.
You often wondered what your friend did differently, that, out of the two of you, it was your signals and confessions that got turned down. It was you who got their hair ruffled, feelings not taken seriously, and teased for having a "fleeting crush" that has been gnawing at you for a decade. It was you who had to swear multiple times that you're going to move on, except you don't because god damn it you love Kim Seokjin with your entire being and heart.
Just as you had gotten used to their relationship, the thought of them getting engaged now opens up a wound in your heart, bigger and deeper than the last. “Can you really not love me, Jinnie?” you ask, quiet as you stare at the ring. “Is there really no chance?”
Seokjin smiles apologetically. “I do love you, (N/N),” he tells you in that brotherly tone he’s always used. “Just not the way you want me to.”
Here he is, wishing you happiness after he finally realized that your feelings he brushed off as a crush ran deeper than he thought, and a part of you resents him for that. Still, the better part of you—the one that’s so helplessly in love with him—wants his happiness, too.
You find yourself nodding slowly, chuckling breathlessly in defeat. “I want you to be happy, too,” you tell him, tears flowing down your cheeks as he lets you pull him into a hug. ”I wish you the best—all the best in the world.”
Maybe this time, you will finally move on.
MIN YOONGI
Ang tanging hiling ko lang sa kanya
My only wish to them is that
Huwag kang paluhain at alagaan ka niya
They never make you cry and they take care of you
Deep down, you knew.
You knew your time with Yoongi was up.
The gummy smiles, lingering touches, and warmth beside you in bed were once the things that made you feel fuzzy with love, but now they twist and turn your insides. The eyes that once look at you with adoration were fading, and while you knew well he did nothing behind your back, you could tell him staying with you was becoming nothing but a repetitive seesaw game. It's only a matter of time before he asks you both to get off of it.
But before that…
“Do you love him?”
HYBE’s recent rising producer avoids your eyes, practically squirming in guilt. They’ve been working on the new album together, and all it took was one visit to know that his love wasn’t meant for you anymore.
For a couple of months, you tried reigniting the spark you and Yoongi lost, huddling over that could-have-beens and waiting for that warmth to return to you, but it never did. You love him, but you’ve grown tired. You think he has, too.
It’s time to put an end to this.
“Be honest with me, please,” you softly beg, “I need to know.”
Finally, you receive a nod in response, tears brimming around eyes that can’t really stare at you for too long. “I’m so sorry,” they tell you, and a gut feeling tells you they truly do love him. You’ve been in those shoes before, falling helplessly for a man like Min Yoongi.
“Don’t be,” you say, “He loves you, too, you know. I can tell.”
In the distance, you see a familiar figure standing at the entrance of the coffee shop. Your heart clenches as you meet his heavy gaze filled to the brim with concern and sorrow. “Please take care of him,” you turn your attention back to the person before you. “He always forgets to eat and sleep on busy days, and he always manages to fall asleep in the most uncomfortable of places.”
Wide eyes follow you walking towards the man that held both of your hearts in his hands. A glassy-eyed Yoongi waits for you to stop before him, unsure of what to say or do.
It was you who made things easier for him, hands shaking as you take off the ring on your finger. With one last smile, you place it in his hand and give it a squeeze of assurance.
“Life happily, Min Yoongi.”
JUNG HOSEOK
Ba't 'di ko naisip na mayro'ng hanggan?
Why didn’t I think that our story would have an end?
Ako 'yong nauna, pero siya ang wakas
I was your first, but they will be your last
For your first love, you were given a real gentleman in the form of Jung Hoseok.
The memories you built together in the secret in-betweens of his life as Jung Hoseok and J-Hope of BTS were a core part of you as a person. There was a struggle, of course—with him and his budding career as an idol, and you finishing your studies—but in the moments you were together, the world just felt right. He just felt right. It all felt like it would never end.
Except when it did.
When the distance and everything else became too much, he had asked to break things off. A part of you loved him still—you don't think it's possible to ever stop loving someone like him—but you, too, knew the both of you couldn't hold out any longer with how things were.
You thought, then and there, that it would be impossible for you to stop loving Jung Hoseok even if it would be the last you'd hear from him, but if this is what that was, then you wouldn't mind loving him from afar.
Until, years later, that unspoken promise of yours manifests itself in a more painful form.
You bump into him at a family reunion and meet him as the man your third cousin has been spoken for. The fancy, shiny rock on their finger had all the aunties and grannies squealing.
"It's been a while," Hoseok softly greets, hesitantly holding out a hand for you to shake, and for the sake of civility, you obliged.
Butterflies spring across your belly, and it's a familiar yet dreadful feeling—like the undead coming to take you. "I know, right?" you attempt to muse, retreating your hand. "Life's been good I hope?"
"Good as can be," he politely nods, sending a smile your cousin’s way in a way that makes your heart clench.
The tension must’ve been clear enough on your face, since your cousin picks up on it so easily. "You know each other?" they ask, head tilting in confusion.
You couldn't blame them, or anyone outside the boys and the management, for not knowing. The world didn't know a (Y/N) (L/N) existed—that once upon a time she loved a man named Jung Hoseok and he loved her.
Still, you know it isn’t right or fair for you to chase him when they’re happy and content in their own little bubble. You'll always love Jung Hoseok, even if from afar.
"Yeah," you smile, bittersweet, "but it was a long time ago. Don't worry."
Whoever said first love never dies must've clearly meant something else.
KIM NAMJOON
Ba't 'di ko nakita na ayaw mo na?
How could I have missed that you no longer wanted this?
Ako ang kasama, pero hanap mo siya
You’re with me, but you were looking for someone else
Kim Namjoon is the best boyfriend you can ever ask for.
When he holds you in his arms, it's one of the best places in the world—so soft like clouds, and so warm like a hearth, that you'll almost always be seen dozing off.
When he gets to decide on the date, he takes you to these places that really heal your soul, and when you pick, he simply goes with the flow.
When he speaks, it's always the most thoughtful, sincerest pieces of his thoughts—one that always brings you comfort, makes you feel seen and heard, and your heart swells with delight.
Which is why you had to say it before you regret not doing so.
"I love you, you know."
The silence of the night sits between you both, the chatter of the party inside nothing but a faded noise. Namjoon stands next to you, gentle giant that he is, making you look up at him with a soft smile on your face.
A blink or two, and he breaks his pause with a stammer. "I…" he hesitates, wetting his lips as he rubs his nape. "I'm sorry…"
Oh. So it's like that after all.
You stand there in silence, heart open for the taking and he's sweating in guilt. "I know we've been together for quite some time now," he seeks to explain himself, "and in the beginning, I really thought this could lead to something real, but there's been a recent epiphany that has changed things for me."
He takes a deep breath. "I'm—"
"in love with someone else?"
The smile on your lips return, and this time, he recognizes the bittersweet hints of it. "I know, Joon," you tell him, "I'm not that blind."
The very person in his heart was inside, having fun with the rest of the members—the same one you've caught receiving the end of his lingering gaze in the past month, the same one that he is so ready to help or hangout with, and the same one he unconsciously looks for every time you're together.
Had he held you, gone to your dates, and spoken to you thinking about them instead?
You don't want to know.
In truth, this was what you've been preparing for to happen—the pain to come from ripping the bandaid you've covered your delusions with. "I…" you breathlessly chuckle, not expecting your heart to be hurting this much. "I really did hope for the probability that you would choose me, but I can see very clearly that this isn't what you want."
Still, if his wisdom had ever taught you anything, it was to cherish what you've had. "I'm glad I tried though," you smile amidst blurring tears. "That I got to know what it's like to have someone as sweet as you be my boyfriend."
"(Y/N)..."
Those warmth he would give, the embodiment of comfort and safety you never quite found anywhere else, and the little things that made you fall in love with him—such things showed you what a good kind of love can feel like.
Deep down, you had wanted to play into your fantasy just a little more before you both had to put an end to it.
You take one hand and squeeze it, indulging in the feel of his hand in yours. "I really do love you though," you tell him, other hand reaching to cup his cheek as you did, "and I want you to be happy. I hope you know that."
A breathy exhale left him as his glassy eyes took you in. "I'm really sorry, (Y/N)..."
"There's no use pretending otherwise," you hush. "The heart wants what it wants."
And it doesn't want me.
Mustering your strength, you tiptoe and give his cheek a kiss. "Thank you for everything."
Kim Namjoon is still the best boyfriend you could've ever asked for, even if he didn't love you in the end.
PARK JIMIN
Ba't 'di mo sinabi no'ng una pa lang?
Why didn’t you tell me from the start?
Ako ang kailangan, pero 'di ang mahal
That I was who you needed, but not who you loved
“What?”
The rain pours harshly against the windows as the words you hear from your boyfriend rips your heart out from within. You feel the world come to a stop, and you pray—pray—for it all to have been some sick nightmare your brain conjured up from movies and stories.
Park Jimin sits before you, head hung low and fingers fiddling with each other. “I…” he sighs with a shaky breath that takes yours as you wait for him to repeat his confession. “I don’t love you anymore…”
The past year flashed before your eyes—back to when he went from being your best friend to someone who made the butterflies in your belly go wild with excitement. If this had been in the early stages, maybe then you wouldn’t be so hurt—maybe then, you could accept this as a mere fling that’d pass.
Why did he have to make you fall in love with him?
“Is this about who I think it is?”
Jimin flinches and in that instant, you know how much you’ve been a fool all along.
Back when you were young—just teens still joking around and figuring out life—he had fallen for someone he shouldn’t have fallen for, someone who didn’t really love him back the way he had hoped. You’ve seen him cry over her, go through countless stages of grief, and move on to become the man he is today. You’ve held him through that rough patch in his life, and needless to say, you feel utterly betrayed right now.
Last month, their paths crossed again and you thought nothing of it, until now that you’re looking at the disaster that’s come to tear you to shreds. “Was I…” you breath hitched as you try to hold back a sob, “was I just a placeholder all along?”
Jimin’s eyes go wide as he profusely shakes his heart. “(Y/N), no. I just…” he scrambles to sort his words. “I didn’t expect for my feelings for her to come back like this, a-and—”
“What?” you scoff, “they love you now?”
A part of you—a tiny fraction of it—feels some semblance of relief to hear he did love you in some way, but that could only mean you were never enough to compete with that person. You knew it—from the way he was so lovestruck before and from the way he’s shaking with guilt now.
“I’m so sorry,” he cries, as you gather your bearings.
You don’t know how things will end up for them, but you know better than to keep a heart that’ll never be yours. If happiness for him is with them, then you’ll give him that and you won’t be in his life any longer.
“Don’t get your heart broken again, Park Jimin,” you say, soft with your sincerest worry for the man you loved, yet cold from the betrayal you’ve been slapped with. “I’d hate for you to feel like this.”
KIM TAEHYUNG
Ba't 'di mo inamin na mayro'ng iba?
Why didn’t you tell me that there was someone else?
Ako ang kayakap, pero isip mo siya
I was in your arms, but someone else was on your mind
"It's just not the same anymore…"
In hindsight, you suppose you should've seen this coming.
The moment your clingy boyfriend became distant, his bright, boxy smile becoming strained, you should've seen this coming.
The moment he started making excuses and not coming home to you, you should've seen this coming.
The moment the once comfortable silence became stifling, your mind panicking to fill the void in, you should've seen this coming.
Except you didn't.
Here you are at the dead of night, clutching the covers tightly and pretending to be asleep while Taehyung's sitting at the edge of the bed on a call. You listen to the love of your life confess to his best friend how he's falling out of love with you, and how he's terrified that he's finding that spark in someone else instead.
You don't hear Jimin's end, but something he says makes Taehyung sigh shakily. "I don't know what to do," he says, voice heavy with guilt and heartache. "I can't look at her anymore without feeling shitty. I tried but…"
He's crying.
By some miracle—perhaps that of the gaping hole in your heart—you find yourself too hurt, too shocked, and too much to be in tears. Kim Taehyung, who had always talked of your future together, was now torn between his heart and the promises he's made with you.
"I don't know what to do…"
Stuck between the urge to hug and hit him, you end up doing nothing—until the call ended, until he collected himself enough to cool off in the shower, and until he finally laid down beside you.
For the first time in months, Kim Taehyung holds you close in his arms, and while it sears your heart even more, you let him—snuggle closer to savor what you know may be the last of your moments with him. Later, while he sleeps, you find yourself brushing away the faint crease between his brows, a sad smile on your lips.
You don't know who had started to occupy his heart, but, while you're boiling in a mix of emotions having to face the end of this, you hope deep down that they'll do well to love him back.
"I love you, you idiot," you want to tell the sleeping boy, "but I wouldn't want you stuck with me like this."
You should've seen this coming.
Taehyung had always been the romantic that'd be stubborn about something like this until he's all bottled up, drained, and ready to explode. Just because the two of you had started like a fairytale did not mean you would end up like one.
JEON JUNGKOOK
At kita naman sa 'yong mga mata
And I see it in your eyes
Kung bakit pinili mo siya
Why you chose them
"Look at this, (Y/N)!"
As he shows you something on his phone, Jeon Jungkook stands beside you with a brilliant smile so full of love and adoration it hurts. Perhaps, it was because you knew very well that it would never be for you.
The screen of his phone played him and the love of his life sky-diving in their recent trip, the two of them making competitive turns to see who gets the most flips while descending the drop. Their laughter echoes and rings through your ears.
It's not fair.
Somewhere, something inside you cries out—the ugly beast called envy you've been coexisting with for the past three years making itself known. Indeed, it wasn't fair.
They don't know him as well as you do.
Unlike you, who grew up with Jungkook and spent weekends playing together at each other's house.
Unlike you, who encouraged his antics and got into trouble with him because of his shenanigans.
Unlike you, who knew a lot of his deepest secrets and seen him in nearly every breakdown.
Yet, unlike you, they’re the one who managed to win his heart.
Every now and then, you find yourself picking her apart, mind swirling in the many ways that made you different from one another, and wondering what part of your love for him wasn't enough to make him yours. It hurts to say it, but you can only acknowledge your defeat. They’re beautiful inside and out, does no harm but takes no shit, and easily commands the attention of everyone in the room. Someone perfect for Jeon Jungkook himself.
With presence alone, his eyes twinkle like the night sky in an absence of light pollution. He giggles—giggles—at any notion of hers he finds utterly adorable, and you hear that giggle more often than you could ever want to hear.
You'd probably fall in love with them too if you weren't so in love with their boyfriend.
Yet, to love someone is to make them happy, and happiness with them was never the same with you. What kind of lover are you if you don't want this shining version of Jeon Jungkook in this world?
You find it in you to smile—for him and the happiness radiating in his life—and feign awe at the adventures they had together. “That looks awesome! How’d you guys manage that?” you say, prompting him to tell you more of the fun he had and watch him light up for the umpteenth time.
𝓽𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 : @mwitsmejk @dreamamubarak
#bts au#bts writing#bts scenarios#bts song fic#bts headcannons#bts reactions#bts angst#kim namjoon x reader#kim seokjin x reader#min yoongi x reader#jung hoseok x reader#park jimin x reader#kim taehyung x reader#jeon jungkook x reader#kim namjoon angst#kim seokjin angst#min yoongi angst#jung hoseok angst#park jimin angst#kim taehyung angst#jeon jungkook angst
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Hey there, it's the anon you recruited lol
Tbh, i forgot to inform you that it was not only that you convinced to to finally listen to bts, but to kpop in general. I had some weird dislike for bts because of the 'boy with luv' ( was salty they didn't give halsey more lines) and was afraid of k stans in general. I don't personally love their newer releases, but wings is *chef's kiss* and also all of their cyphers are amazing.
I think i'm gonna have to go with Yoongi for my bias. fitting since he was the first person i read fanfic about lmao
Thanks for spicing up my playlist. I'm more cultured now!
(wow this ask became long, sorry for that)
Looking forward to ldomlt and your posts in general, they always bring a smile to my face :D
omg i'm so happy you came back 🥰 hi!!! i'm so excited for you to fall down the kpop rabbit hole with us. there's so much fun to be had!!!
tbh i feel you on the fandom aspect 🙈 i casually followed bts for quite a while before i got fully into the online army world. i think there are a lot of negative perceptions about kpop fandom - some based in truth, some less so - that largely come from the 'vocal minority' that sadly tends to exist for any kind of large community. just gotta carve out your own groove with what works for you!! and as with anything on the internet, the mute/block buttons are always your friends 🫶
and congrats on your immaculate TAAAAAASTE w your album and song choices my friend !!! wings is so slept on imo and has some of my all-time faves. BS&T ofc but like lie? mama? first love? awake? interlude: wings? 2! 3!? 21st century girl????? literally all so good 😭
OMG YOU ARE IN YOUR PRIME, THERE HAS MAYBE NEVER BEEN A BETTER TIME TO BE A YOONGI BIAS THAN TODAY!!!! have you listened to d-day yet, or watched the haegeum MV that just dropped??? i'd love to know what you thought 🥺 definitely make sure you check out his previous solo mixtapes as well if you haven't (agust d and d-2) - the agust d trilogy is truly a goddamn masterpiece!!
also highly recommend digging into the broader kpop scene if you still want more, there's a lot of amazing groups and artists out there beyond just our bangtan boys 🥰 i'll recommend a not-quite-kpop group that is one of yoongi's faves (and inspirations!) and goes well with the more rap-heavy style it seems like you're into - epik high!!! i saw them in concert last month and my god they are just living legends, for real. definitely check them out if you get a chance!!
my response being even longer omg, i threw so much at you 🙈 for real though, i cannot overstate how happy it makes me to hear from you again 💜 got a bias and everything, there's no turning back now!!! 😈 i'm so glad you decided to give bangtan a try, and it means the world that you're enjoying LDOMLT and all of my weird chaos on this little corner of the internet 🥺 thank you for being here!!!! 🫂
#anonymous#mbox 📮#will never get over being an army recruiter wheiugrhkjdfg#truly the honor of my life 🙇♀️
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