#like if thay excuses the abuse he put my sister and i through like fuck that dude he had not right hitting my sister in the face | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

raenef · 4 years

Text

I’m just gonna.. babble about my teens for a hot minute

tw for being a hot mess and just.. suicide and cutting talk.

While thinking about my childhood, I’m remembering my mum blaming a lot of my problems on my music tastes. Was my abusive dad the issue to my cutting? my suicide attempts? nah, OBVIOUSLY it was my music.

my dad refusing to buy me a cd because aND I QUOTE “we’re a christian family” while he gambled and cheated on my mum lmao though yeah its because he didnt want to spare 10 fucking dollars but i will never get over that excuse for it, i honestly probably wouldn’t have been so angry if he just said he didn’t want to pay for it.

i remember i stole 20$ from my brother. so my dad went to my room, ripped every single poster i had in my room while i was in the shower.

“oh its just paper its fine” alright, it wasn’t fine for me. i cut myself up pretty bad because of that

I still resent my mum for staying with him while he choked, spat, belted me. my screaming that all my suicide attempts was because of him didn’t sway her either. finding out that he was cheating didn’t either. i know i shouldn’t blame her because she had shit too but like fuck man protect your fuckin kids

omfg he even got a letter that he solicited a prostitute and she still stayed with him HE SAID HE WAS GIVING DIRECTIONS TO HER LOL.

what gets me is that even now, she will talk to him, so will my sister because they don’t hold grudges and i do lol, sorry when someone puts you through that much fuckin shit why would you be okay with them being in your life. i couldn’t go to my nephews baptism because he was there.

I hope his child thai wife stabs him.

Yeah, my music was totally the source of all my problems.

I’M TOTALLY A WELL ADJUSTED ADULT NOW LOL

#rae babbles #delete later

2 notes · View notes