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dxmoness · 10 months

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BAD ROMANCE | D. Misheru

━━━━ damien misheru. clan of the phoenix, fourth eldest.

‣ yandere alphabet. mentions of blood, murder, etc. ୨:୧

‣ masterlist . recent works . damien misheru. ━━━━

━━━━ Affection. "How does he show his affection to his darling?".

affection takes many heights for him. But his most used one is of spoiling his darling. For him it is simple and easy and always gets their attention just as much as his own body. As for other kinds of affection well...Damien tends to act affectionate in other terms, if you understand what that means.

━━━━ Blood. "How messy is he willing to get for his darling?"

Murder is always the option. For the male, everyone is to be eliminated whether or not they are his darling’s family or what not. He will not stand by with the possibility of a lowlife being his competitor. So he'd be extremely messy for his darling.

━━━━ Cruelty. "How would he treats his darling once he abducts them?"

A Misheru knows many ways of cruelty. Thus he'll try them one by one with them if they dare make so much as a racket towards him or his duties. He is very willing to be as cruel as he possibly could. Hard discipline is always an option.

━━━━ Darling. "Aside from abduction, would he do anything against his darling’s will?"

No. He wouldn't force them to do something they don't want to, unless he has a reason to do so. This would mean many things, an example should be if he finds her with another man. Perhaps then he'd do so much as force himself onto her just to mark her as his but other than that, no.

━━━━ Exposed. "How vulnerable is he when it comes to his darling?"

Exposition? Vulnerability? What's that? To him there is no such thing. He will not show his feelings or thoughts for his darling, so much as show any emotion unless necessary even.

━━━━ Fight. "How would he feel if his darling fought back?"

Pissed. Angry. Pride. Damien's feelings can be of many but one thing is certain. He will punish them whatever the feeling was.

━━━━ Game. "Is this a game to him? How much does he enjoy watching his darling trying to escape him?"

To him? This is just the peek level of entertainment. Watching you find ways, try to make up excuses just to look around your surroundings for possible escape routes and plans was just fun to watch. Because in the end, you couldn't escape. He had you all tied up.

━━━━ Hell. "What would be his darling's worse experience with him?"

I think that would just be called mating season. Since Damien is a demon he must make ends meet. Thus his lustful desires during a specific season will not be quenched so easily. This is when his darling most suffers, especially when they are unable to escape his lustful wantings without so much as a fight or worse.

━━━━ Ideals. "What kind of future does he have in mind for his darling?"

A life solely with him is all he wishes for them. A life where they only depend on him. Also perhaps a life with them as his partner by his side during his times as duty of emperor.

━━━━ Jealousy. "Does he get jealous? How does he handle it?"

Jealousy does not sit well with Damien. Not at all. Every bit of him would want to just tear your outfit and just claim you then and there. Such a thought would be vulgar but in all honesty this is Damien Misheru we're talking about here. He cannot handle his jealousy. Never once did he.

━━━━ Kisses. "How does he act around or with his darling?"

If in public, he'll act how he normally does but worse. There is a certain air when his darling is around with him. An aura that all the nobles hated to even see. But if in private, he'll act almost as much as a loving husband. Almost.

━━━━ Love Letters. "How would he go about approaching his darling?"

The answer is simple. He doesn't. It's either they go to him or he just ignores them. It was always like that unless a man was near them of course.

━━━━ Mask. "Are his true colours drastically different from the way he acts around everyone else?"

No. He acts all the same with everyone else. Only more intimidating at times when with his darling for he doesn't want them to forget that he is their abductor and supposed lover.

━━━━ Naughty. "How would he punish his darling?"

Torture, he'd starve them and make them beg him to forgive them. If not that then, perhaps another thing that is vulgar to the eyes of the public, overstimulation.

━━━━ Oppression. "How many rights would he take away from his darling?"

Not a lot. Perhaps the only right would be to make friends without his knowing and going out without his permission or knowing of who they are visiting.

━━━━ Patience. "How patient is he with his darling?"

That would depend on how stressed he is the time his patience is tested. If, for example, the day had been stressful he probably won't be so nice and patient with them.

━━━━ Quiet. "If his darling leaves, dies, or successfully escapes, would he move on?"

Honestly. Yes. He would. Sure it'd be hard for the first three weeks, but watch as the fourth week passes and he finds a new obsession.

━━━━ Regret. "Would he regret abducting his darling?"

Goodness’ sake, no. Does he look like one to regret that? He'd honestly not do so as to him, his darling is simply a toy for him to obsess over. No such thing as guilt in that statement.

━━━━ Stigma. "What brought about this side of him?"

His youngest sibling. Sorana was the one he had first obsessed over when he was a kid. Reasons unknown mostly. But it was the reason why his behavior is like this towards his darling.

━━━━ Tears. "How does he feel about his darling screaming, crying, or isolating themselves?"

He'd try to "apologize". But in the end, he'd get them out anyway so why bother doing so, no?

━━━━ Unique. "Would they do anything different from the classic Yandere?"

Perhaps maybe the idea of talking to some men. It mostly depends on who the man is to his darling. If it is a family friend or family, then he must allow them entry to his darling's life. After all, why waste good connections?

━━━━ Vice. "What weakness can his darling exploit to escape?"

Attack his sister and they find themselves good to go. Damien is known to care more about his sister than even his darling.

━━━━ Wit's End. "Would they ever hurt their darling?"

At this point, the answer is probably obvious. Yes he would, if he finds use in it he most definitely would.

━━━━ Xoanon. "How much would he worship or revere his darling?"

That's not happening. Nope. He'd never do that. Never.

━━━━ Yearn. "How long does he pine after his darling before he snaps?"

Not that long. It doesn't take long before he starts yearning for them.

━━━━ Zenith. "Would he ever break his darling?"

Definitely.

━━━━ TAGLIST?!

‣ @primordixl, @achy-boo, @orlic1a, @writerig, @lxdymoon0357

#— figuratively leaving the world · ocs 🌹#— the thorned mistress. 💌#• . d. misheru #yandere writing #yandere male #yandere #yandere x you #yandere x reader #yandere x darling #self insert #yandere alphabet #yandere oc

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shibalen · 1 year

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♡ 𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒑 𝒇𝒐𝒓 Sunny🍃

i match you with . . .

𝑲𝑨𝑽𝑬𝑯 !!

Kaveh would for sure fall in love with your colourful character—from the way your friendliness draws out the smiles of strangers on the streets to how big and awe-inspiring a world exists in your mind.

He would be drawn to you from the very beginning because you looked like you were always on the move in search of something new and exciting.

You like sarcasm and banter? Wonderful! Kaveh is super easily provoked but unlike with Alhaitham he knows you don't actually do it to get under his skin and takes your teasing as a playful challenge.

Kaveh is incredibly thankful to finally have someone who actually listens to him. Of course, many at the Akademiya respect him but you make an effort to also understand where his thoughts come from, what his ideals are behind his way of thinking.

Thinks it's really adorable when you daydream and seem to disappear into a world of your own. He often asks what you're thinking about because he loves hearing what's on your mind. In addition, he hopes explaining all the tangled up thoughts from overthinking might help you organise them.

On the other hand, as well-defined as his own values and ambitions are, I don't believe he's oblivious to the pressure of needing people to have a good opinion of you. His wide-spread reputation and fame certainly hasn't come without this problem.

Therefore, he would do his best to always reassure you your value does not revolve around what others think. He hates seeing you hurt from all these unrealistic expectations and thinking about them makes him fume.

The same goes for times when you feel inferior. Kaveh won't have any of that, not on his watch. In this man's world you stand on the highest pedestal of brilliance and he does not hesitate to let you know that.

God knows Kaveh would take you out shopping every day of the week if he had the financial freedom to. He'd spoil you with more gifts than you could perhaps even handle: flowers, jewellery, clothes, you name it!

Although it pains his hopelessly romantic heart that he is not capable of that right now, he'll make sure this comes true in the future.

Meanwhile, enjoy his undivided attention and him doting on you in every other way he can think of ♡ Being a renowned architect and a lover of all things fine in the world, Kaveh prides himself on his creativity after all.

♡ 𝑴𝑬𝑬𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮

It was truly the perfect night for new encounters. The Grand Bazaar was bustling with life as visitors from all over Sumeru and beyond had gathered to watch Nilou's latest performance.

You were one of her most loyal fans so naturally you would not miss a performance this big for the world, even though the crowd was too tense for your liking. You had even shown up early enough to get a spot close to the stage.

However, as the show was about to begin and people filled the area in front of the stage to the brim you still found it hard to see on the stage. What made it worse was that an incredibly tall man just happened to push his way right in front of your line of sight.

Obviously you weren't going to have any of that but just as you were about to tell this guy off another voice came from beside you.

"Hey, you, sir. Mind moving more to the side a bit? The rest of us are also trying to see the performance."

You wouldn't have thought someone clad in such eloquent-looking clothes would have a voice that loud and a tongue that sharp. You couldn't help but grin as the man blocking the view moved aside.

"Thank you, but I think I had it."

"Ahaha, better luck next time then."

His wink and light-hearted response made something in your heart flutter, and when he noticed you were still looking at him he too seemed to hesitate.

Out of the kindness of his heart or awkward embarrassment, he snapped you out of your daze by whispering the dance was about to begin. At that, you hurriedly redirected your focus, feeling silly for not having even noticed your own staring.

Thankfully, you forgot about the issue immediately as Nilou's dance drew you into a different kind of trance. It wasn't until the end of the evening and you leaving the bazaar that the thoughts about that pretty guy literally came tapping you on the shoulder.

Because there he stood, a somewhat sheepish smile on his face. "Hey, I noticed you seemed really into Nilou's dance. I'm a big fan myself. Would you like to join me for a drink in Puspa Café? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Oh, I'm Kaveh, by the way. It's a pleasure to meet you."

It was quite clear to you he had rehearsed these lines in his mind before coming over to you, yet you could detect no ill will in his tone or his small, hopeful smile.

One cup of coffee with this stranger couldn't hurt, right?

♡ 𝑩𝑳𝑼𝑹𝑩𝑺

The line between friendship and something more lingered between you for quite a while, mostly because you were so comfortable around each other you could be as honest and close as you wished.

Yet the closer you grew the more clingy Kaveh became. Don't get him wrong, he didn't do it on purpose: physical affection is just a part of his way of showing his love! Of course, he also respects your personal space.

But oftentimes you find yourself trapped in his arms and you might as well accept that. This is your new home. Whether you're snuggling or casually doing work, Kaveh needs his daily hugs.

Also absolutely melts when you run your fingers through his hair.

During moments like these you like to tease him that despite putting on such a confident, self-assured front, he's such a softie at the end of the day. Naturally he protests to this because he wants to look cool in front of you but the second you continue playing with his hair he admits defeat.

"Only for you though," he mumbles, burying his face in your chest.

When he's extremely busy with a project, working himself to death day and night alike, you usually come by the Akademiya or his Alhaitham's place to remind him to rest. And if that already doesn't make Kaveh's heart clench in adoration for you enough, you just had to bring all those cakes to eat together.

He can't refuse you when you ask him to come sit down and you know it ( • ̀ω•́ ) Kaveh probably knows it too but he's too grateful and too much in love to do anything about it.

And once he's finally free again he makes up for all the moments he made you feel lonely, so expect to be pampered more than usual.

That doesn't mean just quality time with hugs and kisses but if Kaveh earned any money from the project, he takes you on a vacation somewhere exciting! Maybe Inazuma now that the borders are open, or Mondstadt for the Windblume Festival?

He wants to do the tradition of giving you a Windblume to show his love so bad aaaa—

You have a secret spot high on one of the Akademiya's rooves where you can watch the perfect sunset together and go stargazing. Kaveh may not be a part of the Rtawahist Drashan but he knows enough about the stars to chat on and on about them with you.

Loves dancing with you! Whether it's in a tavern swinging you to upbeat traditional music or somewhere private as he holds you close, sharing these intimate moments with you lights up his world with sparks and glee ♡ man cannot stop grinning.

Invites you play TCG (and gossip ahem) with him, Cyno, Tighnari and Alhaitham if you're interested. He'll make sure to take any pressure off your shoulders so you could have a fun relaxing evening. Everyone else assures you too that there is no need for any kind of formalities (o˘⌣˘o)

Alhaitham info-dumping all of Kaveh's embarrassing stories

Matching outfits! I repeat, matching outfits!! Also matching charms, probably something silly/cute like a cat that reminds him of the one you have.

All in all, an extremely fun and loyal couple! Kaveh 100% devotes himself to your comfort and happiness because you are the star that lit up his universe at its darkest.

𑁍 𝑱𝑬𝑾𝑬𝑳𝑳𝑬𝑹𝒀 𝑩𝑶𝑿

— favourite memory with you

When he got locked out of the house (again lol) and you invited him to stay over at your place. It was you were coming back from a late library study session that Kaveh realised he didn't have the house key, so you kindly suggested that he'd stay over because it was already so late. At first he got kind of flustered cause you weren't together yet but you kept insisting it was fine so he gave in. Poor guy was still tense enough you would be sleeping in your bed in another room. Well, on the bright side, in the end you didn't actually do much sleeping cause you stayed up the whole night playing games in your room. When the two of you finally did doze off it was your head on his shoulder and his head resting on yours ♡︎ For Kaveh this memory is special because it was the moment he woke up next to you that he realised this was the sight he wanted to see every morning for the rest of his life.

— favourite places to kiss you

Oh he's such a gentleman, so sweet and tender with the kisses he leaves on your jawline and corners of your mouth. Likes to have a romantic mood set up before kissing you on your lips: smiling at each other, leaning in close and letting your foreheads touch before closing his eyes and the gap between you.

— favourite nicknames to call you by

'My muse' and 'dearest' are his personal favourites because how well they suit you. Alongside are the other few terms of endearment that he likes to call you by. Contrary to first impressions, I see him as the type to carry a lot of meaning for the names he uses instead of having a dozen random ones. So if he uses something beside your name, know he says it with great emphasis on his feelings and thoughts ♡︎

❦︎ 𝑰𝑵𝑲 𝑩𝑶𝑿

— Truth be told you'd known this was coming from the moment you learnt his name. Ah, a famous architect. I have heard all kinds of stories and rumours circulate him. It must be a handful.

— But you had also forgotten about this detail as you and himgrew closer, as nothing else seemed to matter when you were bantering in a café over something meaningless or laughing your hearts out on your stroll through a golden landscape . . . or when he was holding you close on sleepless moonlit nights.

— When the issue did arise, the rumours had already began spreading like wildfire. Neither of you knew why people suddenly thought your relationship was some merit-based agreement: that Kaveh could get additional funds from you and you got the fame.

— This was obviously a neither true nor logical assumption, and you'd think residents of the nation of wisdom knew better and check their sources twice. However, the harm had been done and wherever you went on the streets of Sumeru City or Port Ormos you couldn't escape the subtle glances of distain. There was always someone whispering in behind your back.

— You hated it and Kaveh hated it, not because he was worried for himself—he was used to this happening to him—but for you. He knew exactly how much this was hurting you and the helplessness against it made him feel pathetic.

— There was nothing left for either of you to do except to wait for the wave to pass or make the gossip stop. The only way for the second option to work, of course, was to go your separate ways.

— You had both been thinking about it, but Kaveh was the one to bring it up one evening. Still, his proposal hurt. His face and voice were tight with regret and you could tell he was trying his hardest to hold back the tears he grasped both your hands in his.

— "This is my fault. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you. You've been through so much you don't deserve. I think . . . the only way to make this right is making sure you don't have anything to do with me from now on."

— "You can tell everyone I was just using you, and you won't have to worry about them spreading any false rumours about you again. My muse, you deserve so much better than I can give you."

— What shall your answer be? There is no right or wrong choice after all if all you want is to be happy again.

♡︎ runner up: Kamisato Ayato

note: Ngl I fell a little for Kaveh while writing this hehe ^^ but thank you for your patience, you sound amazing, I really hope you see this! I would also like to personally thank Calm Down by Rema for sponsoring the feels for this matchup (｀･ω･´)ゞ

#if my characterisation of him doesn't turn out to be accurate i will jump into a well #and disappear from shame #Sunny🍃#len's matches #matchups #genshin impact matchups #send pics of your cat pls

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redphlox · 3 years

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Dabi's fear of feelings and connections

Dabi is a walking contradiction; he says he doesn't care about anyone, but his flames, which are linked to his emotions, demonstrate otherwise when Twice is killed. Dabi brushes off the news that Natsuo could have died because of him but still refers to him affectionately as Natsu-kun. Touya went around calling Endeavor out for neglecting his children but still trained to regain his approval and attention anyway. He lashed out at baby Shouto, admitted Shouto had done nothing wrong, and then attacked him again years later. He cries blood while thinking about his family but doesn't go home to them or change his actions which hurt them even more. Dabi wants to destroy hero society for a better future but it's obvious he doesn't plan to live long enough to see that future.

The gaps between his actions and his words are a result of dissociation and repression. It's not that Dabi is emotionless. Actually, he feels too much and he's afraid of his feelings because they've done nothing but hurt him emotionally and physically. He literally almost burned to death the one time he had a burst of emotion on Sekoto Peak and in order to prevent a repeat of that, he operates under the flawed notion that safety lies in repressing his feelings and pushing people away. He lies to himself and others and therefore cannot reconcile with his true self and can’t trust others.

In this meta I'll discuss how Dabi deals with his unprocessed feelings of betrayal and neglect by denying himself connections with both his inner wounded child and those around him. I'll also address a few misconceptions surrounding Dabi because dismantling them is key to understanding him. Contrary to popular belief, he does not want to kill his father, he never wanted to be a hero for his own sake, and he doesn't hate Shouto or his family. At its core, Touya's hurt stems from discovering that his relationship with his father wasn't based on unconditional love. This realization destroyed his sense of self so much it caused him to start fearing his own feelings and being close to others because of the link between his emotions and his self-destructive quirk.

To understand Dabi we have to understand Touya. In 291 we see through Endeavor's flashback that Touya was eager to train under him and carry his legacy. It's implied by the fact they’re working on ultimate moves that not only is Touya a willing, eager participant but that the two have been training together for quite some time. In 301 we learn that after Touya's quirk started hurting him Endeavor not only abandoned the training regime but also abandoned Touya both emotionally and physically. Instead of using the time he spent training Touya to help Touya find a new hobby or purpose in life, or just hanging out with his kid, Endeavor chooses to remove himself from Touya’s life. When Touya confronts him about the change of routine, Endeavor is seen putting on his jacket and leaving the home, his body turned away from his son.

Maybe Endeavor had errands to run, but my point is that he was in Touya’s life one minute and then gone the next. Touya says so himself: why did Endeavor change his mind all of a sudden? The abrupt change in attitude was jarring for a 4-5 year old to handle. To Touya, training = love, so he felt compelled to keep training and demonstrate his worthiness despite the fact that his quirk was hurting him. To Touya, the pain was worth it if it meant hanging out with his dad again.

But why? Well, Touya was Endeavor's #1 fan, genuinely so. His admiration and fondness for his father was genuine, and he didn't question the triumphant look on Endeavor's face when Touya said he wanted to learn the ultimate move. Before his quirk started burning him, Touya had no idea he was born for his father's ulterior motives. He had no reason to question his father's attention. Touya lived under the impression his bond with his dad was genuine and special, and he probably felt lucky that his father was willing to share something so important to him (heroism). Even after the training stops and Endeavor stops paying attention to Touya, Touya still wears his merch and vies for his attention. Most kids see their parents as larger than life and Touya was no exception. Keigo Takami admired Endeavor the hero, and Touya Todoroki admired his father who just so happened to be the hero Endeavor. Since being a hero was such a big deal for Endeavor, it was a big deal for Touya.

But that's where Touya's story becomes tragic. His father is a flawed, flawed man with many insecurities and fallacies that he pushes onto his family. I’ll get to those in a moment, but as intelligent and observant Touya is to catch on that Endeavor never set out to marry to become a father, he is too young to separate himself from his father’s expectations. Touya realizes he was born for a purpose and Touya will be damned if he doesn't fulfill that purpose even if he knows it's wrong. His father's ‘love’ meant that much to him. For Touya, it's not about becoming a hero for the glory. It was about his relationship with his father because, as I mentioned earlier, Touya was his #1 fan in the sense that he loved Enji just for being his dad. There were no conditions tied to that. “You are my dad, and I love you.”

But that wasn’t a sentiment that Touya felt in return, and that hurt Touya. He internalized he wasn't good enough, that something about him was inherently wrong. But more than that, his world came tumbling down - he felt betrayed and lied to: his father didn't love him like Touya needed him to, and this truth destroyed him. Their relationship was a lie, a farce, and it hurt so much Touya became obsessed with not hurting anymore because he couldn’t get away from it.

Touya’s motivation to become a hero didn't rise from being inspired by All Might like Shouto. Touya’s thought process wasn’t "I want to be a hero to help others or be like All Might" like Deku. No, Touya only wanted to be a hero because he wanted his father to be proud of him for surpassing All Might. Notice that Touya's obsession with beating All Might slowly diminishes from “I can surpass All Might” to “I can surpass All Might like Shouto, too” to just “look at me, Endeavor.” It was never about being a hero per say, but about his relationship with his father. Touya realized that Endeavor isn't his father first, but a hero, and he understands that he has to be a hero too to fit into his father's world. Even upon realizing that his father was using him, Touya still wanted to be part of his life, still wanted that bond. Touya, in his desperation to be loved and accepted again, could look past his father's selfishness as long as he regained that approval. Touya could pretend the relationship was real as long as he stopped feeling so unlovable.

This is unhealthy thinking, of course. Even if Touya somehow managed to regain Endeavor's approval, the relationship would still be one-sided and dissatisfying because he wouldn't be able to ignore the truth. But, this is how he rationalized his insistence to keep training in his 4-5 year old mind and this line of thought stuck with him as he grew up just as those feelings of inadequacy never left him.

This is precisely why Natsuo's drowsy "can't you go talk to our sister?" hurt so much. Touya was already emotionally fragile, and hearing that felt like being rejected all over again when it was actually Natsuo just trying to sleep. Touya was hypersensitive to any words or actions that could be interpreted as dismissive. His trauma wouldn't listen to logic that Natsuo was 8 and too young to understand, that he was tired - no, Touya's brain said, you're being rejected again! This is also why he also stormed away crying from Fuyumi after she expressed her concern for him.

In Touya’s mind, why couldn't anyone just agree with him that he was good enough? He heard "your dad's right and you're not good enough so why try" not "I care about you, your father is wrong, and I don't want you to keep getting hurt" whenever Rei tried to get him to stop training because that's the message he got from his father, too. Nevermind that it infuriated Touya that his mother could stand there and preach to him when, from his perspective, she couldn’t take her own advice. All Endeavor ever did was teach him to turn up the heat, so why should it matter that doing just so hurts him? Touya didn't understand NOT training his quirk because he had been taught that raising his firepower was ideal in all situations. Those two statements didn't make sense to a 4-5 year old, a 13 year old, and it still doesn’t make sense as a 24 year old.

To take Endeavor's lack of self awareness a step further, because it's important to understand Endeavor to fully understand Dabi, Endeavor has yet to realize his own inherent worth. He doesn't have to prove anything to his family, especially his kids. They love him unconditionally, without special reason aside from the fact that he's theirs and he's himself. However, Endeavor is so obsessed with proving himself that he doesn't realize he never had to, and he projects this onto his children. They must prove themselves by winning the genetic lottery, by being useful to his plans, by surpassing All Might.

The irony that to be a great father he doesn't have to be a hero at all is ugly because Endeavor has no identity outside of being a hero. Endeavor has said before he wants to be a good hero and father to make Shouto proud, but he fails to realize he already had this in Touya all those years ago and it still left him unsatisfied. The issue isn’t his role as a hero, it’s his inner self. In 301 Endeavor literally reaches out to Touya to talk him out of training and hurting himself, and Touya allows his father to touch his shoulders because he wants a bond with his father - any bond. Shouto, on the other hand, wouldn't allow Endeavor to touch him in 167 and slaps his hand away because he doesn’t want Endeavor’s approval. Endeavor doesn't realize Natsuo carries deep abandonment and neglect issues because he wanted to be accepted by his father too (light novel #5) but was ignored. Endeavor doesn't realize he was always good enough by default and that by projecting onto his kids and trying to be the top hero he’s doing the opposite of what he wants. He just keeps pushing away his family.

It’s important to point out Endeavor’s illogical thinking because Touya learned some of these same ideas. Touya repeatedly tries to prove himself without realizing that he was always good enough by default. The problem wasn’t his quirk or his body, but his father’s flawed thinking and self-worth issues. Now as an adult, Dabi is selfish because he's Endeavor's son and emobidies his most negative characteristics. Dabi thinks of his flames as Endeavor's, and he thinks of himself as an extension of Endeavor because that's how Endeavor set him up for life. Touya has no identity to fall back on after his father casts him aside. He was supposed to be Endeavor 2.0, but now that title is Shouto’s. Dabi doesn’t hate Shouto as a person, but he has tricked himself into believing Shouto is their father’s puppet. Shouto is a doll being used by their father with no self agency, and Dabi is going to break all of Endeavor’s toys. It’s nothing personal against Shouto, it’s just Shouto’s bad luck that he happens to be Endeavor’s masterpiece. This is why Dabi doesn’t hurt Shouto when they first meet at the training camp, and why Dabi stops attacking Shouto after Endeavor passes out - it’s not about Shouto. It’s about Endeavor, and breaking Endeavor. Touya is still there trying to be part of his father’s world, only this time not as a hero but as a villain who will end his own suffering. He doesn't want Endeavor to die, he just wants him to suffer, to ruin his dreams. Dabi thinks of it as justice.

But because Touya is still there, there is still that goodness in him, too. His connection to Fuyumi and Natsuo is still there, repressed and compartmentalized. It’s why he calls them affectionately as Fuyumi-chan and Natsu-kun. Touya’s pain is so great he has decided he’d rather end it than to carry on and look elsewhere. He's stuck, rightfully so. He recognizes his mother is a flawed person and ultimately doesn’t blame her for being a victim - she could have done more for her son, but he still sees her and his other siblings, even Shouto, as people who fell victim to Endeavor’s abuse who don't challenge their situation. Dabi sees himself as someone who does stand up to the abuse but doesn’t realize he still wants his father’s attention. He's always wanted it. That's why he went around at 13 condemning his father's treatment of his children but still trained to prove himself. This is part of the reason he became a villain.

Not to mention that Dabi literally can't cry. He has no way to release those emotions, so instead of trying to let them out, he pushes them down. But that doesn't work and is detrimental in the long run. In 290-294 we saw Dabi's flames burn so hot during his confrontation with Endeavor and revealing himself as Touya that his burns have spread. Dabi is afraid of his feelings because of their connection to his flames, but he also uses his feelings to his advantage. He wants to go out in an inferno along with Shouto just to hurt Endeavor and put an end to his own suffering and Endeavor's career. This is why Dabi doesn't bother calming himself down or denying that he never forgot how he was treated when he lived at home. Dabi became emotional in that battlefield, smiling maniacally instead of crying because he physically can't cry. In his mind, if his feelings are going to destroy him, he might as well use them to prove a point. After all, he has experience being used. It's why he was born.

I'm not saying any of these actions or thoughts are healthy or correct or condoned, by the way. Trauma responses don't make logical sense and usually aren't healthy. Knowing how the mind responds to trauma, it's understandable that Touya still wanted his father's attention even if it was abusive. In fact, this is how children often respond to abuse. Their caretaker/parent is all they know and they cling to these figures. Often times when authorities try to remove a child from their abusive parents, the child doesn't want to go because this parent is all they know and they do feel like they love their parent/caretaker. I’m not saying the authorities got involved in this case, because obviously they didn’t, but this same mentality of abused children can be applied to Touya. Touya, in his four year old mind, probably convinced himself that if he was good enough everything would go back to how it used to be.

So, to sum up Dabi’s character, of course he doesn't make any sense. He’s still that hurt 4-5 year old who is trying to protect himself from ever getting hurt like that again while still wanting his father’s validation. Of course he doesn’t want to get close to anyone, not even the League. He doesn't want to be vulnerable or let people in or form connections because the last time that happened he was let down, forsaken, and it hurt so much it literally made him lose control of his quirk to the point he almost died. When Twice is killed, Dabi consoles himself by saying he didn't care anyway, all to prevent another emotional fire. Dabi is a master of compartmentalizing and boxing away his feelings - this is probably why, 310 chapters into BNHA, we have yet to have a few chapters in his POV or his backstory. He's disconnected from himself. He knows his plot to get justice will hurt his siblings and mother and to live with himself and move forward he represses those feelings.

Because of his father not showing up on Sekoto peak, Dabi has to live with physical disabilities due to his scars and memories of burning alive. He doesn't want to go through that again so he lies to himself that he doesn't care about anyone or anything. He denies that he's still in pain while simultaneously seeking validation of his pain. He acts like he doesn't care about his family but still calls them affectionate names. He acts like he hates Endeavor and calls him by his name but still wants his attention. He decided long ago that he would die destroying Endeavor's career because that was the thing Endeavor cares about most of all in this life. It's a "you hurt me so I'll hurt you" mentality. He has tricked himself into thinking this is justice, failing to realize this won't make him feel better if he doesn't die by his own hand along the way.

Dabi is full of resentment and spite, both of which take root from feelings of abandonment, betrayal, and the loss of a purpose and the realization that he wasn't born to be loved for who he was but as a tool for his father. The first betrayal he suffered was in the form of realizing his father didn't love him genuinely, and this was identity-breaking for him. He never recovered from it. The second betrayal, the reinforcer, was his father not showing up to Sekoto Peak. Since then, Dabi is reliving his trauma over and over again the more he uses his quirk and the more he faces Endeavor. To be saved, Dabi needs to accept that he is loved unconditionally and needs to be validated that he was right to feel thrown aside and used.

#dabi #touya todoroki #toya todoroki #shouto todoroki #shoto todoroki #bnha #bnha meta #my meta #endeavor

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sweetgummyberry · 3 years

Text

"tiger🐯"

Kazutora x fem! reader

💞Fluff💞

(including chifuyu and baji)

//Credits to @chantugokun on twitter for the picture of our bb tora🐯❤️//

You, chifuyu, baji, and kazutora have been working on a pet shop that you all planned for the future and yet it comes true the way you all planned to.

everyone has their duty to do, baji was in charge of advising customers how to look after the pets they've to buy, kazutora will fill the shelves, i will do the cleaning and tidying up the shop every minute or hours, and lastly, chifuyu will check on the pets and will the person that always receive the stocks of medicines, toys, foods and all the pets required, ofc we would always end up forgetting our duties to do so we remove the duty plan, so we all could do duties to duties if we want.

today was a bit hot, it's sunny today and we're here doing our every weekday duty

since we had nothing to do but clean the pet shop, do things to things because there's customer arriving at this day. Baji suddenly had a great idea on his mind, he went to us and ask if we would like to have ice cream, ofc we couldn't have the opportunity to say no since it's really hot and we need some refreshments.

"baji i think you should buy anything cold and refreshing except for the ice cream, the ice cream will melt all the way here and it will end up being a soup" kazutora and i agrees to what was chifuyu stated and baji approves too

"alright i'll be leaving now, chifuyu you should tag along" baji hurriedly signals chifuyu to leave instantly then they both glance at me giving me a thumbs up with a wink, then they leave as soon as possible claiming their victory for leaving the two of us in the shop.

They always do this, because they've known that i like kazutora for so long. The two of them always tease me, they would also push me sometimes when i'm near kazutora making me bump into him, and they would also try to give kazutora a hint that i like him but ended up failing since kazutora thinks they're crazy or saying nonsense.

"hey y/n you ok?, you've been standing there for about 2 minutes" kazutora suddenly starts speaks while putting dog's medicine on proper shelves and the other stocks.

"oh yeah, i'm ok" i stand beside kazutora as i help him with the stocks that needed to be put on their proper shelves

"how's your leg, still in pain??" he unexpectedly starts a discussion since we look awkward if we just do duties without talking to each other

"my legs are a bit fine and still, i can't run haha" i laugh awkwardly as he giggles softly while putting stocks of food on their shelves

"Sorry if this is so sudden but is it true that you have a girlfriend?" my mouth suddenly dared to tell it and it drives me to regret that i might know who it is

"ahh about that, it's not true, it's just a story from pah-chin, don't believe that dumbass." he rolls his eyes while chuckling. "pah-chin sets me up to a blind date last weekend, it did end up nice and the girl was kinda pretty but i don't like her attitude, she's extremely mean to the waitress and waiters. And she just leaves me with all the bills on the food we ate"

kazutora's face express pissed as he clasped both of his hands at the back of his neck relaxing, he did not just want a girl's beauty but also attitude.

"if you didn't like that girl, then what type of girl do you like?" he removes his hands at the back of his head as he straightens up his back while cupping his cheeks, his arms leaning against the counter while glancing at me.

"it's based on their attitude, but i really like girls that are cute, simple and love pets"

i think and think of what the ideal girl does kazutora describes at as i sweep on the floor

"it really doesn't describe me" this sentence keeps on popping through my mind but got back to reality when kazutora out of the abruptly speak

"since i tell you what's my ideal girl, you should tell your ideal boy to me so we're both fair" i glance at him then put the broom at it's rightful place then sit beside him on a medium length stool

"hmm... my ideal boy would be kind, adorable, and gentlemen, and he should love pets just like me.

...

"Wait what are you writing?" he flinch all of the sudden as he hides the paper secretly

"oh it's just the list of the cats that i like" he laughs awkwardly, then the bell at the top of the door rings signaling us that the've might be a customer/s or maybe baji and chifuyu.

they seriously take too long finding refreshments, they did this to me on purpose don't they?, i wonder where did they buy, to another country?.

"Hello welcome to Fluff N Stuff pet shop" we both speak simultaneously and bow as the female customer bows too and she carries around a cute, white pomeranian.

//Author mei's note: So sorry if their pet shop's name is very simple and not that perfect. I try to find some cute pet shop names and can't choose easily so i choose a simple one, so sorry if it's not that unique and cute, i hope you my dear reader, and also the boys baji, chifuyu, and kazutora can forgive me (╥_╥) //

"Excuse me, do you happen to have dog leash just as small as my puppy?" she leans the cute puppy at us while smiling widely and sweetly

if i can describe her she's a girl in her 30's and has a simple and cute style, and she's possibly married because she has a ring on her left ring finger.

"sure ma'am i'll find some small leash just for your cute puppy, please wait here a bit" the woman nod at him while patting her puppy softly as kazutora walks through the shelves, not just far at us

this pet shop is just small and simple so he's not that far at us.

"ma'am would you like to sit at the waiting seats over there?" i put my hands gesturing where the waiting seats are

"you're so kind but no thank you young lady i'm fine waiting here" she smiles sweetly at me as she lean her puppy infront of me while giving her sweet smile again

"would you like to hold her?, she loves beautiful girls" i carry the pomeranian puppy and it licks my face making me giggle "see?, she really loves beautiful girls". The woman chuckles as he glances at kazutora.

"How long have you two are in a relationship sweetie?" the woman suddenly commented as i look at her with a shocked face and also flustered.

"ahh no ma'am we're just friends" i awkwardly laugh as i heard a small chuckle coming from kazutora.

"hahaha, that's the word that i used to tell to my parents when they told me i like my classmate and guess what, we are happily married now with 2 childrens" she pats my head then kazutora came back at us.

"ma'am maybe these kind of sizes is what suits for your little puppy" kazutora gave the woman a smile and then the woman takes the leash and puts it on at her pomeranian.

"hmm i'll take 4 of these since i have 4 more pomeranians at home, and also i would like to buy 5 packs of a 5 months puppy food"

//Author mei's note: i dunno what does puppy food is called at, forgive my dumbness once again :-( //

"sure ma'am i'll get you some" i hand kazutora the woman's puppy then simply went to the food and stuffs shelves.

Kazutora's POV:

"you know young man, if you like her you should make the first move" the woman speaks quietly in a whisper tone so that y/n couldn't hear it. "But i don't have the courage ma'am" she chuckles as she puts a hand on my shoulder "don't worry, at least she knows how you feel about her, that's what love is you will accept it if she rejects you". the woman smiles at me.

but how am i gonna tell her?, shall i confess to her directly?, or maybe give her a little hint?, i really can't decide how.

"you better tell her immediately before someone could steal her away from you"

"can i ask ma'am, how do you and your husband fall inlove?"

"it's a long story sweetie, but as far as i can tell he was my high school crush, he's the very silent type of boy and i don't know how i fall in love with that boy, all i can remember is i feel a butterfly in my stomach, it feels nice and feels ticklish but you'll get used to it as soon as you fall deeper for the one you loved".

Back to your Pov:

"uhh, pardon my intrusion the stuffs are here ma'am, I'll just scan them a second please wait here" i simply went to the counter since i can't run then scan the 5 leashes and 5 puppy foods.

"The total is 1,424 yen" she handed the money and wave a goodbye to us with a smile.

i wish i grew old like her, beautiful and living a happy life.

As soon as the woman left, i sit firmly at the swivel chair and stretching out my hand high then leaving a small groan on my lips as soon as i put my hands down.

"hey i'm just going outside for a bit since i want some fresh air, wanna come along?" kazutora waits for me and stops mid-way at the glass door, with his eyes glancing at me waiting for my response.

"oh no thank you, i'm staying here inside, you can go ahead" then kazutora goes outside waving childishly at the window door that makes me giggle at his cuteness.

then i remember the paper that he hid somewhere in this area, i tried searching for it and quickly found it, he wasn't a good picker of a place to hide this at, it ends up him listing the things i told him about my ideal man.

❤︎What does y/n like in a boy..❤︎

♡ Kind ♡

♡ Adorable ♡

♡ Gentlemen ♡

♡ Pet lover like her ♡

IT REALLY DESCRIBES ME!!~♥︎♥︎♥︎

I LOVE YOU SO MUCHH!!~（＾ｖ＾）

~Kazutora ♡ Y/n~

I blush really hard from what i read.

then out of the blue, someone kissed my cheeks and that made me blush harder than before.

"so you did like me too hm?" kazutora abruptly speaks at my right ear softly that made me past away from the tension.

"how did you know?!" i panicked then lean away from him by swinging the swivel chair quite far from him.

"it's too obvious, plus chifuyu and baji already told me, i just fake not believing them but inside of me truly believed it and hope it wasn't just fake".

he slowly walks at me leaning at my face, until he was really close that i can feel his heartbeat throbbing hard.

"h-hey you're too close kazu, what if some customers walks in?", i push him off but i can't since hes gripping at the armrest of the swivel chair.

"don't worry they won't come in, i swear" he gave me his sweet smile and then out of a sudden kissed me.

it took me a while to realize that i'm kissing him right now, the person i love. I felt so really happy inside and i can feel the butterflies in my stomach rising and flying around my stomach, it felt so nice yet too much.

Baji Pov:

"hey baji i think we should go back to the shop now, i think they've been waiting for the refreshments for 3 hours" chifuyu taps my shoulder as he walks infront of me pulling me.

"Okay let's buy now"

We both headed to a convenience store, buying few refreshments and some chips, then we went back to the pet shop quickly since we don't want the refreshments to got warm. We stop running when we saw our pet shop

"baji do you have any idea what they've been doing? i then think of a thing that they could possibly do

"maybe they've been confessing to each other by now, let's sneak and peek at them.

we both run and once we reach the side of the shop i told chifuyu to be the one that was gonna peek, chifuyu then tap my shoulders rapidly with his head still peeping.

"What is i-" i secretly caught them kissing each other,

"i knew it they would successfully be couple now" chifuyu and i are cheering quietly while jumping up and down.

"you guys finished jumping up and down?" kazutora glance at us while his hands at his hips with a disappointed look on his face, "finally you two came back, i thought you guys have been buying refreshments to another country, you two took so long going back here" y/n suddenly pops out behind kazutora the same gesture as kazutora but she has a smile on his face.

"you two seem to have a good time together when we're gone am i right?" chifuyu suddenly stated as he chuckles that made kazutora and y/n blush obviously.

"W-wait you two saw us don't you?!" y/n suddenly ran inside as we all went inside too

"How are we not gonna saw the two of you?, outside of the shop is literally made of glass so we can see you clearly with our two eyes"

Back to your Pov:

kazutora unexpectedly giggles, while tidying up the things that are not in their proper orders.

"I told you kazu!, someone could see us!"

"So what?, atleast they can see who you belong to"

♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡

#tokyo revengers #tokyo manji gang #tokrev kazutora #kazutora x you #toman baji #baji keisuke #chifuyu matsuno #kazutora hanemiya #kazutora x y/n #anime #loveislove #Anime #fluff

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youuuimeanmee · 3 years

Text

Eren Meta From 139

Many people believe chapter 139 butchered Eren's character because of this scene.

Because out of nowhere, Eren's motivation is to reach Mikasa's choice to satisfy Ymir's wish; thus, everything he said from the beginning about his motivation is all lies or meaningless.

No. And I'm no writing this to justify or condemn him. This post is more for myself, because I'm trying to understand his character.

Now let's see at his words. "All of it, was to arrive at that result. That's why I moved forward." What does he mean by it? Which actions?

This.

All the events, starting from ch 123-139, are going according to Ymir's wish.

Right after Eren told her to decide for herself.

She wants to end the world, at least 80% of it. She wants to push Eren's friends to stop him, even if they have to betray their nation. The Battle of Heaven and Earth, all of the clusterfucks in chapter 135-138 happens because it's Ymir's will to push Mikasa to make a choice. She chooses to end the titan curse after she gets to see what she wants.

Ymir did all of this, she watched all the events that unfold because Eren released her.

Then, what about Eren's will?

This is why I'm okay with the idea of Eren following Ymir; Eren doesn't have a reason to reject Ymir's wish because he got what he wants. He got the future he saw on the medal ceremony, the eradication of titans. He got the "freedom" to flatten the earth, and if his gamble paid off, he'd get his friends' safety; because they will become the world's savior after they stop him. It's a win-win situation, thus, putting him in a position where he becomes Ymir's ally and stands by her side.

The reason why Ymir chose Mikasa is not clear, but Eren had a hunch and it's something he could relate to; another reason for him to not object to Ymir's wish. It has something to do with that day when Mikasa practically confessed her love for him, the day where he could use the Founder's power for the first time. I leave this scene up to your interpretation.

What about Eren's will from before 123? What did he try so hard to achieve?

This scenery. Aside from the eradication of titans.

Here's the thing. Doesn't matter if fate favors you or not, you have to work hard to get what you want. To work hard, you need to know the reason. I take Isayama's artistic choice that the future memories he saw are fragments without context; he doesn't know why it happens the way it would. So, even if he saw the scenery, even if he saw the eradication of titans, why he has to go to hell first? Why he has to go through all of the suffering? Why he has to keep moving forward? He doesn't have to; but the world, destiny or whatever keeps feeding him reasons to move forward, until he reached a conclusion that the titan world is fucked up system and has been going for far too long. For Eren, this needs to end, and he wants to reach that scenery no matter what.

This is the man who saw how unforgiving the outside world is. The fact that a little girl got eaten by dogs just because she's an Eldia is proof that a subject of Ymir can never gain freedom, can never gain the privilege of human rights the way a normal human does. (I suggest you to read Gross' monologue from ch 87). The man saw how the world keeps pushing Paradis to be the source of evil without listening to what the other parties have to say. The man is manipulated to euthanize his own people as if Eldia doesn't deserve to be born. He saw the fucked up history of titans from 2000 years ago. He was so disappointed the world is not like in Armin's book, it's not like his ideal world. So he wants to wipe it away. He wants to bury the history and the civilization that created it, deep to the ground. He wants to destroy every last one of those animals, that's on this earth; titans or humans alike. He wants to leave the surface a blank plain. This is his ideal world, his freedom.

Eren said it himself. Even if he didn't know that his friends would stop him; even if it's not Ymir's will, he'd still trample the earth. To me, the reason why Eren commit genocide, the reason he said to Armin is no different than the reason he said to Zeke.

It's just the way he is ever since he was born.

A freedom seeker.

The wording is different with the receiver. With Zeke, it's different, because he's trying to make a point that this is who he is. But with Armin? He is going to die, with his best friend as his judge. He knew exactly why he wanted it: because he is free, ever since he was born. But somehow he couldn't say it outright with confidence. Maybe he's afraid to be judged as a monster by the person closest to him, or maybe he started to question his definition of freedom. Because to me, his eyes look like wonders.

Now. What is freedom? Many people believe that any acts out of violence is not freedom. But to Eren, that is freedom, his freedom. There's a meta that perfectly explains Eren's version of freedom, up until he did the rumbling. This is my highlight from that meta:

So freedom is the power of the individual to do as one wants. When you do something, you are imposing your internal desires onto the external world. If freedom is thus the power to impose your individual Will onto the outside world, then whoever has more power has more freedom.

This concept was highlighted when he told his friends in Paths that he's free to destroy the world and they're free to defend it; meaning that they're bound to clash, and they have to fight.

Freedom is not good. Nor is it bad. It is a force beyond good and evil, and that is precisely why it is terrifying. This, I believe, is why so many baulk at the idea that such a ruthless manipulator could be the avatar of freedom in this story. What I have always loved about SNK is how it delves ever deeper into its themes as the story goes on and discovers such fundamental paradoxes that your understanding of the idea is changed forever. If this is the horrifying face of freedom, perhaps we should not be free.

I don't know how much Isayama's involvement in this, but Grisha's commentary from the Lost Girls captures this concept perfectly.

For Eren, that "great power" is his own concept of freedom: A world without oppression. Doing what you want to do. He's free to protect his homeland by whatever necessary, whatever cost, and leave the rest of the world as an open plain.

Usually, the more we're obsessed with something, the more we stray from our humanity. After witnessing firsthand the vision-he-so-called-freedom, he doesn't know how to feel. He gets what he wants, but he's not happy at all, only the hollow scenery remains.

Eren realized how messed up he is, even before he did this. He tried to reach out to Mikasa that night after he saved Ramzi, to save his humanity left. It's one of the reasons why he asked her, "what is he to her?" Surely if he was loved –even after he killed those men when he saved her that day– would mean he's still human, right? And by running away with her, he could live in peace, maybe he could free himself from his obsession. But he's doing it so half-heartedly, that when everyone interrupted them, he just... let it go. He didn't bother to sneak with her or anything. He couldn't let go of the future he saw, he's losing himself to his desire/inner demon, to his obsession of freedom. Or maybe he's winning over his pathetic self so he could focus on what he needs to do? One could interpret this scene as Eren trying to break free from his obsession for "freedom." One could interpret this scene as Eren trying to break free from the shackles of his conscience. It's up to you.

Eren's outburst over Mikasa in this chapter is his pent-up feeling over her. It is, but after I write this meta, maybe it's more than that. It's because she's the proof of his humanity left. Many, many times, Mikasa is there to stop him from ruining himself. Mikasa's love creates a subconscious understanding that she will always be there for him. That's a part of her that he loves, and by feeling love, it means his humanity still exists. If Mikasa chooses to move on with another man, it means she will forget all the times they had together, she will forget the most human side of him. The only person who loves him as who he is, his home, would be lost. He would be lost. That idea scares him, even though he knows he doesn't deserve her love after everything he has done.

One more thing; another reason why Eren doesn't mind to be stopped, aside from Ymir's wish will get him what he wants –as I already explained. People argue that the conflict won't end until Paradis or the rest of the world remains; thus, Eren's half-hearted genocide is meaningless. No. No matter how angry he is that he wants to eradicate everything, he has enough maturity to understand, even back from the Battle of Trost, that humanity is far from united even if they're faced against a threat beyond human understanding. During the after-party night before the Battle of Shiganshina, he accepts that great power comes from joining ourselves together. We all need to find our own roles. Humans are created differently, because of times like this. By sparing the rest of the world, it keeps both Paradis and the world from collapsing. By keeping the diversity of people, someday it will open a path for peace because it's a part of human nature to try to understand each other; he learned it from the SC. Eren believes Armin could take him there, after he died. Maybe he forgot all of that because he's too caught up in his hate and anger up until 122, the same way he forgot back in the days.

Even if it's not explicitly explained in this chapter, I'd like to think that Eren got plenty of time to reflect on this matter when he did the Rumbling, to fill the emptiness he felt after he reached what he wants wanted.

Eren wins in the end, but at what cost? This chapter is calling out his tyrannical mindset, and it's great to see him realized his error, even if it's too late for him to go back.

Maybe this is what Isayama decided to focus on the last chapter, even if it's rushed. Maybe he (or his editor, idk) wanted the ending to focus on the protagonist's story about humans vs titans. The way Eren is so determined to wipe it out from this world, no matter how messed up his method, no matter how much he suffers, it doesn't matter if it's predestined or not. Because "freedom" is what he seeks ever since he was born. Because Eldia, every person deserves to be born in this world. Yes, every person, including everyone he killed. He knew the gravity of his action and choose to accept his death. Maybe it's the reason why Isayama doesn't delve into the aftermath of genocide further.

He wants the ending to be about Eren Yeager, The Attack Titan's journey about Attack. On. Titan.

#eren's character writing is still great in my eyes #or am i just too blind?#shingeki no kyojin #snk #snk spoilers #snk 139 #attack on titan #aot #aot 139 #aot spoilers #eren yeager #eren jaeger #snk meta #snk analyses

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n-ctarinenga · 4 years

Text

Flower Boy [ boxer!calum ]

flower boy series | pt.1 | word count: 5,659 | masterlist

"Thank you so much! I'll have these to you as soon as possible. Goodbye!"

Talia grins, as she farewells the family whos portraits she had just finished shooting.

As much as she loves photography, there were only so many matching outfits and unhappy children a person could handle in a day, and with the family that had just left her studio, Talia had reached her limit.

Draining days were something she had gotten used to, business booming lately thanks to the kind words of a handful of past clients. With doors only opening just under a year ago, Valentine Studios didn't exactly have the longest history in town, but Talia liked to believe her dedication and skill made up for lack of experience.

Her mother hadn't really approved of the move, her ideals for her daughter being stuck a few decades in the past.

With the thought of her mother flashing through her mind, Talia couldn't help but sigh as she moved to pack up her camera for the night.

After the great disbandment of the Alisley family, it was nearly impossible for either of the Alisley children to communicate with their mother, but that didn't stop Yvonne from making her annual call to her kids, mostly about the percentage paid out to them every couple weeks from their father's estate royalties, which in Talia's case, was this morning.

From that point onward, it felt like the universe had decided to torment Talia today.

Starting off with the phone call, and most recently manifesting as a set of twins who refused to do any form of posing with their parents, Talia couldn't wait to go home and sleep so she could start the next day fresh and away from the negative vibes of the current day.

Once her backdrops had been rolled up, and her camera was safely stored in its bag, Talia finally had time to let down her dark brown hair, the two bright streaks of red framing her face. She took great pleasure in turning all the lights off, and locking the door of the studio behind her.

Taking a second to relax in her car, Talia looks at her phone, scrolling through til she reaches the contact of her brother, Brandon.

The Alisley family were estranged from each other these days, but that didn't mean that Talia and Brandon had stopped being lifelong best friends.

The two had always been close, only a couple years between the siblings. Growing up in a world surrounded by adults until they themselves were well into their teens, they were practically a package deal until they had both moved into their own apartments a few years ago.

As of late, while Talia was diving head first into Valentine, Brandon was knee deep in The Vault, the gym he had started not long before Talia opened her own business.

Sitting in her car, Talia contemplated calling him for a moment, her finger hovering over the call button as she thought.

With both of them being so busy, they had barely had time to catch up over the last couple months, and after the day she had had today, Talia needed a bit of chill time with the only other person in the world who could understand her situation.

Their father always joked they could communicate telepathically, and after not seeing him for so long, Talia missed speaking her native tongue.

Deciding to make her way over to the gym, Brandon always telling her he was there any Friday night she would try to make plans with him lately, Talia constructed a plan for what she would do once she finally had convinced her brother to stop throwing himself into his work every Friday night.

With The Vault situated downtown, it was a bit of a drive in Los Angeles traffic, but with the thought of the Thai food just up the street from the gym in her mind, Talia couldn't find it in herself to care about the lengthy journey.

The radio softly played one of the many playlists made on Talia's phone as she drove along, windows down and the breeze lightly whipping her hair around as she did her best to relax while she had the chance.

While most people were finishing their work week, Talia, being the head photographer at Valentine, was still one day away from her own weekend, working every Saturday since the studio opened. This made it easier for families to get together for their shoots, not having to worry about getting back to work and getting the kids back to school, and Talia could tell her clients appreciated it, which made the extra day of work worth it to her.

Propping her head up, with her left elbow resting on the top of the door, Talia can't help the frown that flashes onto her face as she approaches the gym.

Expecting to see only Brandon's car and maybe another employee's, the full parking lot beside the building confuses her. How many people would be at a gym after hours?

The confused frown on Talia's face lingers as she parks her car next one she definitely recognised as Brandon's, climbing out and locking it before pocketing her keys and approaching a man who looked slightly familiar, noticing he was one of Brandon's employees as she got closer.

"Johnny," Talia smiles politely, the man turning to her with wide eyes as he recognizes her, "what's happening here?" She asks.

Johnny stutters for a moment, looking around like he rather be anywhere else in the world at this exact moment.

"Oh, here? Just some regulars here for a get together. Your brother left a few hours back though." He says quickly, tripping over his words slightly, almost like he was making a story up as he went along.

Suspicion courses through Talia at the deflective words of the man much taller than she is, and if she didn't already know him, she probably would have been intimidated by his size alone.

"I just parked next to his car though, and it's kinda odd for Brandon to leave the gym open." Talia laughs awkwardly, not trusting of the excuse she was being given when she knew her brother better than to leave not only his business open, but also his car unlocked outside it.

"I think I'll just check things out for myself thanks Johnny." Talia states, before taking a step forward towards the entrance.

Sensing her disbelief, and his face turning to one of panic, Johnny takes a step sideways, blocking the door from Talia's path.

"Brandon said that you were banned from Friday nights. I'm sorry Talia." He finally says, and Talia can't help the look of surprise that covers her face.

"Me? Banned from the Vault? I hardly think so mate." She laughs, taking advantage of the height difference between them to duck under Johnny's arm, easily pushing the door open into the gym.

Immediately, Talia is met with a wall of noise.

A crowd, some seated, some not, surround the central boxing ring at the center of the building. The usual smell of cleaning supplies and sweat is amplified by the stench of beer radiating through the whole building, but even then, the thing that grabs Talia's attention isn't the crowd or their behavior, but instead, what they're watching.

In the center of the ring, two large, well built men circle each other. Talia watches on in horror for only a moment before one man launches his fist forward towards the others stomach, and it's in this moment she realizes that the men aren't wearing gloves, but thin bloodied wraps.

The crowd roar with a wave of life as the punch connects, the second man doubling over and leaving himself exposed to an onslaught the first delivers without hesitation.

Even with the presence of Johnny behind her, the only thing Talia can see is the pure violence playing out in front of her, realization growing by the second as her eyes finally break away from the ring to where her brother stands at the back of the crowd.

She can't help but think her father might have been right about the telepathy, because almost as if he could sense her eyes on him, Brandon's own find her.

All of the colour drains from Brandon's face as he excuses himself from the black haired man he's talking to, running around the outside of the crowd to reach his sister, who stands frozen in place.

He says nothing as he grabs Talia's hand, pulling her sideways into the office room to the right of the building, easily tugging her past the back of the crowd that still stare focused into the ring.

The clinical white lights above them come to life as Brandon flicks the switch beside the door, shutting it behind him quickly before he turns back to Talia.

"What are you doing here?" He asks quickly, inspecting her as if she was a wounded animal ready to pounce.

Fighting her disbelief at the situation and his question, Talia's eyes go wide as a wave of anger washes over her at his question.

"What am I doing here? What the fuck is that shit, Brandon?!" She throws back at him, her voice louder and stronger than she expected it to come out of her.

Waving his hands panicked, trying to get her to lower her voice, Brandon tries to shush her, which only makes her more ticked off.

"Look you weren't supposed to see that-"

"Answer my fucking question or I'll start screamin' it." She threatens, cutting him off mid sentence.

An angry and frustrated expression settles on his face as Brandon let's out a huff, not knowing how to word his explanation and remaining silent while he tries to find the right words.

"Is this why you've been blowing me off for months? You got some fucking fight club bullshit going on here instead?" She questions further, her voice breaking slightly with stress.

"I can't tell you all the fucking details in one breath, Talia. I wasn't exactly expecting you to find out like this."

Brandon argues, throwing his hand up in annoyance, which only confuses her more.

"What makes you think you have the right to be angry at me when you're the one that has the explaining to do?"

"Fuck! Alright! I get it!" He whisper yells harshly, face twisting in anger and making the siblings look even more alike than usual, Talia taking a step back at his sudden outburst, "look, the money is gonna get cut off one day, I'm thinking about my future, OUR futures here. That's what this shit is about."

"And what exactly is this shit, Brandon?" Talia asks, aggressively pointing towards the door that barely separated them from the crowd.

"It's boxing. Same shit you see on TV, just, not as commercial."

"This isn't the same shit as on TV! Those guys aren't even wearing gloves!" She argues, smacking the back of her hand as she speaks.

"Bare knuckle and wraps get better bets, the guys make their own decisions on if they do it or not." Brandon defends as he crosses his arms.

Talia shakes her head in annoyance, her face twisting. Everything was happening so quickly, meaning she barely had enough time to process all the information being thrown at her.

"You're scared of mommy cutting off the royalties so this is what you do instead?" She asks.

"The money is gonna get cut off and it's gonna be sooner rather than later. Do you expect me to suck up forever? To hide Sam til she dies too? Mom hates both of us now and you know it just as well as I do."

Talia feels her throat tighten at his words. Her stomach felt like it was close to emptying its content as the gut punch of his words hit her at a hundred miles per hour.

"Shut the fuck up. You know I love Sam and you know I don't want to do it just as much as you don't want to. But you're right, it will be sooner if she finds out about this." She spits back.

Taking a step towards him, arms crossed, Talia holds steady eye contact as she looks up to her brother.

"You're not the only one she can fuck over. When she finds out and cuts me off too, what the fuck are we gonna do, huh?" She whispers harshly as the crowd outside the room bursts into life again, the next round starting.

Brandon breaks the eye contact between them as he stares at the ground, fists clenched at his sides as the obvious stress of the situation flashes across his face.

"She won't, not yet."

Talia rolls her eyes as her arms uncross, leaning back against his desk.

"Mom always finds out."

"She won't this ti-"

Brandon is interrupted by the office door swinging open, a tall man with blonde hair and a panicked look on his face ignoring Talia to address Brandon the second his eyes land on him.

"Hood's broken Knight's nose." He says in a rush, causing Brandon to groan, following the man out the door before turning back to Talia.

"Don't leave this office, I'll be back soon."

Talia throws her brother a sarcastic thumbs up before he rushes off, the door clicking shut behind him.

Talia felt like her mind was in the worst spin she'd ever experienced. Finally the late nights, the astronomical bills being excused as gym costs, the secrets, they all made sense.

As angry as she was with her brother, she was more worried about him than anything.

Seeing the crowd, the action in the ring, it was more than just the sparring she would see from time to time as she made the rounds to check in on things. These people were out for blood, and would throw as much money as they needed at it to make it happen. This wasn't the kind of thing she ever expected Brandon to be involved in, and it shocked her that he's involved in that world obviously as more than just a spectator.

Sitting down in the office chair, Talia rests her elbows on the desk in front of her, covering her face with her hands as she tries to take a deep breath to calm her nerves, but jumping as the crowd outside roars again.

This wasn't something she was familiar with, and the uncharted territory this laid out in front of her felt like a minefield. Both her brother's lies, and the violence they were hiding.

With her anxiety peaking as she sits deep in her thoughts, she nearly yelps as the office door flies open, a tall man coming in and looking around for someone, before their eyes finally land on Talia.

If the sharp jawline, dark eyes and deadly look on his face didn't take her breath away, the ripped and bruised skin under his eye sure did.

A seemingly permanent scowl was set on the man's face, and his height and all black outfit just added to the intimidating stance he has as he lets the door swing shut behind him.

Talia couldn't help but notice that the man is attractive, even with blood dripping down his face, noticing his hair closely cropped to his head, apart from the wild bleached curls that fell onto his forehead.

For a brief moment, the angry look on the man's face softens upon seeing the smaller woman sitting behind his boss's desk, but it's instantly replaced by a look of confusion.

"Who the fuck are you?" He asks, his voice deeper than she expected with an unfamiliar accent laced into his words.

Slightly taken back, Talia frowns, withdrawing from the desk and standing up behind it, her defensive nature quickly taking over.

"I'm Talia Alisley, who the fuck are you?"

This time it's the man that's taken back, his eyebrows shooting up as he scoffs, arrogance in spades and tension building by the second as Talia crosses her arms in front of herself.

"I'm Calum Hood," He says, and Talia freezes.

Hood. Was he the Hood that the blonde man was talking about? The one who apparently had broken the nose of the guy Brandon was checking on?

"and I'm guessing you're the precious little sister." He comments, and this time it's Talia that raises her eyebrow. Did Brandon mention her to these guys?

"Too right I am, so don't fuck with me and we should be fine. Brandon said he'd be back soon." She replies, sitting back down with her arms still crossed and the scowl on her face settling in while in his presence.

Deep down, Talia knew it was probably a bad idea to piss off the guy who was not only bleeding, but the cause of a broke nose two rooms over, but her pride and defensive nature was far more powerful than the anxiety swirling in her stomach.

"No need to worry about that, princess." Calum rolls his eyes in annoyance. If Brandon was gonna send him to his office, he could at least show up instead of wasting his time, and give him a warning.

Talia was thankful in that moment for the low light of the room on account of the desk lamp being off, hiding the blush that made her ears burn. Yeah, he might be a dickhead, but he was still an attractive dickhead.

Slumping down into the chair opposite Talia with a huff, Calum shakes his head, while Talia stays stone faced across from him.

"You alright?" She asks after a moment, referring to where blood still sits on his cheekbone.

Calum frowns at her attitude change, not aware of the injury that he sustained from Knight's ringed hand landing a right hook before Calum landed his own.

In his defense, Knight should have known better than to touch his gear.

With the confused look flashing across his face for a longer period this time, Talia can't help but roll her eyes.

"You're bleeding under your eye, bro." She points out.

As Calum reaches up to touch his cheek, the door opens, the blonde man from before walking in with Brandon in toe as Talia thanks her lucky stars.

"Not gonna lie I thought you would have left by now." Brandon says, looking at Talia first while her eyes stay on the actions of the blonde man opening a medical kit on the desk.

"Oh don't worry, I want to." She comments.

"So do I, can I go now?" Calum directs towards Brandon as the blonde man touches an alcohol wipe to his cheek, making his aggressive expression falter slightly.

"Once Luke says you're okay and once I've dealt with you, yes." He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face.

"Look," Talia says, standing up and holding her hands up in surrender, "obviously you've got a lot of shit going on here right now so we'll deal with this tomorrow." She gestures between them, walking around the desk and past the three men.

Letting out a sigh, Brandon sends her a look of appreciation.

"Thanks T, text me when you get home." He replies, to which she sends him a short nod.

"Luke, can you walk her out?" He asks, turning to the man getting up from kneeling in front of Calum.

"Yeah, no worries." He smiles, taking his gloves off and throwing them in the bin.

Walking out the door with Luke, Talia winces at the loudness of the crowd, thankful for the taller, now calm, man standing between them and herself.

"I'm Luke, by the way." He smiles kindly, holding his hand out for Talia to shake as they make it to the door.

"Talia. Gotta be honest, I wish this was under better circumstances." She smiles tightly back at him, shaking his hand.

"Yeah," he laughs, "me too."

As they make it outside, Talia leads Luke around the building to where her car sits, right next to Brandon's.

"Well, this is me." She says, signalling to her car with the keys in her hand. "Thanks for walking me past all of that."

"No problem. Drive safe." Luke says with a small wave to her, and she gives him an appreciative smile.

"You too. See you 'round, Luke."

Climbing into her car, Talia sighs, relaxing only slightly in the familiar surroundings.

As she pulls away from the curb, Luke sends her a final wave before walking back into the gym.

Driving away, the adrenaline of the situation starts to wear off, and the reality of the situation starts to sink in.

"God, I'm gonna fucking kill him." Talia mutters to herself, turning the radio up and going over the night's events in her head as she drives back to her apartment.

The next morning, Talia awakes with a rock of dread weighing down her stomach.

Her mind immediately flashes back to the events of the night before, and as she showers, gets dressed and locks her apartment door, it almost felt like she wore the dread of the impending conversation she needed to have with her brother as a scarf tied too tightly around her neck.

Instead of heading straight to the studio and editing the photos of the last few days as usual, Talia instead took a deep breath as she started heading back towards Vault, having a couple hours to hopefully get answers before her first clients for the day were set to arrive at eleven.

The parking lot beside Vault sat a lot emptier today. Only a handful of cars sprinkled around, and just like last night, Talia pulls into the space beside Brandon's car.

Taking a moment before walking in, Talia leans back in her seat, closing her eyes.

She was scared. Of Brandon's explanation, of possibly having to accept whatever the fuck she had witnessed last night, of walking out more confused than she was about to walk in.

Her and Brandon had grown up play fighting, and catching an odd round or two when their dad decided to watch Friday Fight Night, but violence had never really been part of their lives in a physical form. Apart from a questionable wrestling phase when she was 14, Talia couldn't even remember the last time she saw two people in a ring together that wasn't casual sparring when she would frequent the gym in its early days.

None of it compared to what she saw last night.

With what happened still fresh in her mind, Talia climbs out of her car, pushing the door shut behind her.

Johnny doesn't stand by the entrance this morning, meaning Talia easily walks into the gym, the door squeaking slightly in protest as she pushes it open.

It's almost like nothing had even happened. All the equipment that was pushed against a wall last night now sits in its normal place, the shelves of alcohol behind the check in desk now stocked with protein powders like less than twelve hours ago the counter wasn't a very convincing bar.

Hearing her come in the door, a couple people look up from what they're doing, sending Talia a polite smile before returning to their work.

Calum Hood is not one of these people.

Almost like the universe had put a glowing neon sign over his head, Talia's eyes instantly wander towards where Calum stands next to the black haired man she recognized as the same person Brandon was talking to last night when she arrived.

Noticing her too, Calum’s encouragement of his best friend is interrupted by his eyes catching a flash of blue hair in his peripheral vision.

While he knew any animosity towards the woman who could probably have him fired with a few fake tears was a bad idea to hold onto, he couldn't help but feel annoyed upon seeing her in what he thought of as his domain.

Face settling into a frown as she looks across the room to the man who easily got on her nerves last night, Talia almost doesn't notice Brandon coming up behind her.

"Hey." He greets quietly, holding a takeaway cup of coffee out to his sister. "Time for that talk, huh?"

"Yeah. Think so." She takes the coffee with a nod of thanks, and hesitantly follows him to his office.

Talia couldn't tell if Brandon was trying to suck up to her with free coffee, but after sitting down at the chair in front of his desk and taking a sip, tasting vanilla latte, she knows he is.

"So, where should we start?" He asks, settling into his seat with a heavy sigh.

Talia scoffs lightly, raising her eyebrow.

"The beginning would be good."

Brandon nods, looking down at his desk to avoid meeting her eyes.

"The fights started around one, maybe two months after we opened, so we've been hosting them for about fourteen months now."

Talia's eyes go wide, disbelief covering her face as she places her cup on his desk forcefully.

"You're telling me you've been hiding this shit for over a year?" She asks, anger already starting to build.

"Yeah, and if you haven't fucking noticed, it's not been the easiest thing to do." He snaps, before holding his hands up, taking a deep breath and rolling his seat back slightly to calm himself, too much tension already in the air.

Talia bites her tongue, looking down at her hands before she signals to him to continue.

"A friend of mine, Ashton, he was part of an illegal boxing league running out of a rundown place up in Hollywood. I saw him fight there a couple times, saw the conditions myself. The guy running the show was a complete asshole to his guys, but they all needed the money, so they stuck around." He explains, voice quieter than before.

"One night we got to talking. I asked Ash if he thought we might be able to make our own ring, give people a safer place to earn their money. Then we figured out how much we could earn from it, and with shit going so wrong with mom, I figured that if she pulled the rug out from under me, I could use the league as a safety net."

Piecing together the timeline in her head, and doing the best to absorb the information given to her, Talia remains silent and slowly nods along when needed.

"Him and I have built this thing from the ground up, and it's working for us. I manage the books, he manages the guys, and we take care of the admin together. With my connections to the rich assholes who have more money than they know what to do with, and with Ashton's connection to the guys who need that money and want to do it, we're doing really, really well, Talia."

This time it's Talia who avoids eye contact, looking down to her shoes as she curses the logical side of her brain for seeing sense in his story.

"How many people do you have fighting for you?" She asks.

Brandon let's out a heavy breath, waving his hand slightly.

"Around twenty, twenty five. We keep the doors open for the more occasional guy who needs the cash that week."

"And how often are the nights like last night happening?"

"Weekly. Every Friday, normally."

Seeing the hesitation on her face, bottom lip pulled between her teeth, Brandon sits forward to bring her attention to him, her eyes flicking up to meet his.

"I know this is a lot, and I don't expect you to be okay with it, but I do want you to know I'm being smart about this."

Talia sighs, taking a sip of her drink before speaking.

"I know you, so I don't doubt it. It's just so dangerous, Brandon. You can't expect me not to be worried about you."

Brandon laughs lightly, trying to lift the mood slightly.

"I would never expect you not to worry. It's not in your nature."

A small smile tugs at the corners of Talia's lips, and it's enough to ease his mind.

"Anything you want to know about the ring, the business, any of it, I'll answer as best as I can. I trust you more than anyone and I want to do everything I can to make you feel okay with this, and make up for holding it from you."

Talia hazards a look to her brother, seeing on his face that he's been open and honest with her.

"You know I always ask too many questions." She smiles, joking lightly as she referenced something she would hear almost daily from her mother growing up.

Brandon shakes his head as he laughs, taking a sip of his own drink.

"If you get too much for me, I'll just pass you on to Ashton. It's what normally happens around here." He shrugs slightly, before tilting his head.

"Actually, do you want to meet him? He should be around out there." He asks, and Talia mulls the idea over for a moment before agreeing. After all, it would probably be best to know who she would castrate if something happened to Brandon.

"Sure, might as well." She agrees, downing the last of her drink and tossing her cup into the small recycling bin under his desk.

Standing up and following Brandon out of his office, Talia can feel her nerves already starting to act up, and does her best to shove them down as she follows him towards the bench press where the black haired man who she now assumed was Ashton, and Calum stood.

"Hey, guys. I got someone for you to meet." Brandon says, catching their attention as they approach.

Ashton sends her a warm smile as she steps out from behind Brandon, which is a nice contrast from the cold glare Calum sends her way, which she ignores to return the smile instead.

"Ashton, Calum, this is my sister, Talia. Talia, this is the demon on my shoulder Ash, and my blue rock em sock em man Calum."

"We've met." Calum says bluntly, while Ashton raises his eyebrow.

"And we haven't. Nice to meet you, I assure you Brandon's told us nothing but good things." Ashton grins, holding his hand out for her to shake.

Talia takes his hand and can't help but notice how strong his grip is without what looks like any effort, and laughs lightly.

"I'd hope so, but I can't promise my staff have heard the same about him. It's nice to meet you too." She returns, letting her hand drop to her side before she acknowledges the man beside him.

"And yeah, charmed." Talia prods lightly, seeing Calum trying to hide the roll of his eyes from Brandon.

"Talia is gonna be spending more time around, getting to know the workings when she can. I said if she annoys me too much I'm gonna pass her on to you, so fair warning." Brandon informs them, tapping Ashton's arm as he directs his sentence to him.

"Fantastic." Talia hears Calum mutter, not loud enough for the other two to hear it, but just enough that she does.

This time, it's Talia that rolls her eyes at Calum.

As conversation is made, Calum can't help but feel hyper aware of Talia, and the sun shining in from the high windows casting sunbeams through the few red hairs that fell out of her bun and framed her face delicately. He would admit that Talia was pretty, beautiful even, but not audibly, especially not in front of the girl who felt no hesitation in sending him a death glare every few minutes.

The small group spend ten or so minutes talking with each other before Talia's phone rings, letting her know she should start making her way to the studio.

"Looks like I should be getting to work." Talia says, slipping her phone back into her pocket.

"What do you do, if you don't mind me asking?" Ashton inquiries, genuine interest in his tone, making her see why Brandon was such a fan of him.

Talia believed she could read people well, and from her first impression of Ashton, she got nothing but good vibes.

"I'm a photographer, I own my own studio called Valentine." She smiles proudly, and Ashton nods his head in approval.

"My girlfriend works just down the road from you I think! It's not far from Dominion Books, right?"

Pleasant surprise spreads across Talia's face as she nods, happy to have found a common link.

"Yeah! I think I might have seen you there in passing now I think about it." She smiles.

Brandon watches on with joy as he sees both Talia and Ashton getting along, so happy about it in fact that he didn't even notice Calum looking like he would rather be anywhere else in the world.

Talia says her goodbyes to the men before turning to leave, her attention being called back before she makes it too far.

"If you ever need a fill in hunk for a photo shoot, you know who to call." Ashton jokes, sending a wink in her direction.

"Yeah, you can get your brother to pass you my number any time." Calum says sarcastically, surprising her but also making her scoff as she takes a few steps backwards before turning around.

"In your dreams, darlin'." She calls over her shoulder.

As the door swings shut behind her, Calum feels like his feet are glued to the floor, the eyes of his best friend burning into him as Brandon excuses himself to mock throw up against the wall.

"What's that all about between you two?" Ashton asks Calum quietly, picking up his water bottle as Calum picks up his own, holding it up and speaking casually before taking a sip.

"No idea what you're talking about mate."

TAGLIST | @spicycal @calmlftv @irwinkitten @mrandleer @candidcal @lukeskisses @wallflowercal @brooklynsninenine @whereveryouares @everyscarisahealingplace

#calum hood #calum hood fanfic #calum hood imagine #5 seconds of summer #5 seconds of summer fanfic #5 seconds of summer imagine #5 seconds of summer blurb #5sos #5sos fanfic

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rikkang · 3 years

Text

Here is my doctor who oc. Missy/Master's companion.

This is her profile.

Commission of @queen_2cha/@highas_cms on twitter.

" I love you"

Name: Isabelle Grace

"Do what you want, Missy. But that doesn't mean you're everything in my life."

Title: Witch's pet

Age: 27

Born in Hampsihre, UK. (Living in London because of work.)

Job: Research Engineer (Doctor who series 8, working in 3W)

Birth: December 10th

Physical

176cm, 60kg.

Not skinny, but look slim because of her height. Arms and legs are stretched out so there is no fat, but there is a moderate amount of flesh in areas such as he waist and chest.

Blood type B.

Appearance

If you look at Isabelle Grace, the first thing you see would be her hair. Does it resembel the graceful moonlight of full moon, or the pale beauty of dawn? The smooth silvery gray hair pouring down from the edge of the wing porridge was so attractive that Selene, the God of the moonn and the owner of the silver carriage, was admirable and fall in love. It reflects light under the sun, like a light blue-silver shroud, and it has a faint sparkle in the dark.

However, Isabelle was not the type to stand tall in the crowd. As if she were pursuing an extremely ordinary life. As she claims, her bangs are neatly arranged and eyebrows were covered, and the clothes on her body were a formal look of a clean modern man. As mentioned earlier, arms and legs stretched out coolly and formed a thin and orphaned line. A thin, straight-cut eyebrow, dropping eyes. The edge of her eyelid which hides her shrap intellect, was wrapped in a red-light make-up that made her look sharper and clearer. The pale pink lips were expressionless, so they were shut up and deported so that her opponent could not read her thoughts. Isabelle Grace was not essentially a predator, nor was a herbivore.

Her long eyelashes would tremble at the rare moment when the grain of emotion was shaken by a single stream of wind. Breathing and sweeping hair behind her ears was Isabelle's small habit and way to express her feelings. Then her opponent's gaze was usually dragged away by her flawless milky back of her hand, her thin, long fingers, and short-rounded nails. It couldn't have been better to hide the slowly fading peach-colored cheeks.

Along with her appearancce, Isabelle's speech was also clear and orderly. She used to go directly to the main point without having to attach a word of desperation, and even though she talked down to her opponent, it was only an extremely exceptional situation, and basically he used honorifics to everyone.

If there is a time when Isabellle Grace is wandering about in confusion, not knowing what to say, it would be the same as when her cheeks are red. Right in fron of her Mistress. A brooch decorated with white patches, a token Missy given for her, was always with Isabelle. There are times when you put it on a ribbon and hang it on a choker, but the fact hat you always carry it with you was an immutable truth.

There is a mole under the right eye.

Personality

KEYWORD: Boredom, Rational, Cynical, Quick-witted, Persistent, Careful

The family grew up in peace. The companionship was smooth, and the livelihood was stble. She was, but everything in the world was boring.

The extremely gorgeous bouquets of flowers, the glitter of long-cut jewels, all sorts of delicies, wealth and honour also do not shake Isabelle Grace's heart. It is not because she is a man wihout desire, but she is tempted with something more baluable than he sum of it all.

While persistent enough to desire Missy, an object that can never be reached, she is prudent enough not to cross the line set by Missy. Missy, who thinks she'll kill Isabelle if she goes against the beat at all the time. Isabelle, who smiles shyly even though the dance with her gradually speeds up. Neither side would be normal. Our lovely cat, Missy called Isabelle that in her affectionate voice. The tile was a mixture of compliments for being quick and cute and ridicule for being tough.

Privacy

Hobby: Visiting exhibitions or fairs, Watching movies with her face tilted against Missy's shoulder.

Personal belongings: Smart phones, Cigarettes and Zippo-lighters, Handkerchiefs with initials, A handful of candy and chocolate.

+ Missy device (after series 10)

Favorites: The moment get to know something new, Sweets, Roughly all the time spend with Missy.

Hates: Something boring, The Doctor.

Ideal man: One who makes herself not boring, A new kind of person.

Family composition: Mother, eldest of one son and two daughters.

Relationships

Missy(short for Mistress)

"See that couple over there? You're the puppy."

Thinking of her Mistress, Isabelle Grace thinks. she may be her beloved pet, but she can never be her beloved pet but she can never be more than that. The moment she was confirmed to have guessed, she became miserable. However, it would be an act of crossing t he promised line to show the crushed the promised line to show the crushed inside. So Isabelle made up her mind. Let's just have a moment of her. When she is satisfied with staying in his memory for a while, she draws a line by reminding herself of her resignation. What kind of pet would beg for its owner''s' love? Reminding herself endlessly.

"Say something nice, dear."

"...I love you."

"I didn't expect it. Right, now say something nice, and new?"

For Missy, Isabelle Grace was another fun opponent, as if she were on the palm of her hand. If it wasn't fun, she wouldn't have kept that insignificant human. Because of that, she allowed her occasional skinship for teasing. Like Isabelle hesitating and just hold a finger of Missy, she holding hands tightly and appreciate Isabelle's face turning as fresh as a teenage girl.

Isabelle devoted, obedient, and sometimes grumbles. Missy accepts that grunt, shows generosity and adores it, but does not allow affection.

Is this love? It wouldn't. There is no way to express their complicated hands with flat words like love.

Master(John Simm)

"I'm the Master."

The moment she first met the master, Isabelle Grace notices. Isabelle didn't have much to like, but one fact that she would never, no mater what, like this Time Lord.

He was Missy's past, but she is nowhere to be founded.

Isabelle's lovee for life and death was only the face of Missy and freindly voice, the past or future (not the present) was not in her own domain. Unlike when she heard about "regeneration" from Missy, Isabelle was once again grateful that Missy, who was a completely different person, has become what she is.

Sometimes watching Missy fit the Master too well, she hid her wistful look reminding that two Time Lords are same person, but that was all.

The master was unwelcome. As Miss did, it was he same that one day suddenly appeared in her life, but Isabelle felt completely different. If there is one talent for her past which look stupid and round (Missy called him this way) it would be that grumble and annoying Isabelle endlessly.

But one should never forget that the opponen is as threatening as the wolf in front of the rabbit.

"The future self of me have given you too much hope. You must have had a lot of fun playing with, huh? What should I do with you..."

To Master, Isabelle would not be a pleasant human being neither. A pet man whom his future self adores. A man possessed by Missy, quick-witted but surely insane. A rude person who does not hide her displeasure completely, with his head gently bent before him, even if she hides her lips by squeezing them.

However, it would be a pleasure ot see the reaction of a vulnerable person who can be held in had at any time.

Master(Sacha Dhawan)

"Yes! It's me, Darling. Miss me?"

After Missy died, Isabelle Grace returned to her former normal, free life. She will never forget Missy for the rest of her life, but she kept her life as if nothing had gappened. Pushing he emotions and memories that sometimes swell up on the other side.

The Master always appeared in front of her without notice.

The day she first met Missy in the forest of Marronnier, where the sun was shining, and the day she put the exiled Master from Galifrey into the Tardis.

And even this moment when she faced the Master again in a goddamn purple suit, Isabelle didn't expect it.

The Master in front of me is not Missy. Just as the former master did when he was regenerated to Misst, so was this one. But she couldn't say he wasn't completely Missy. He had memories of when Missy was with Isabelle, and there was her feelings. Although modified and buried deep, it didn't mean much.

So he can take those feelings to hostage and mock Isabelle. That was why she couldn' deny it completely, knowing he wasn't Missy. It was the reason she hated herself. She knows she's in his grasp, but Isabelle can't let go Master because he had Missy's memories.

Funnily, the Master himself also wasn't completely free from that emotions.

Isabelle Grace was a useful thing for the master. A mere human being who was once valued, but is now nothing. It was a lot of fun to see Isabelle who was distressed when he showed his meaningless memories and past emoions. It was one of Master's many specialties to hold and shake human in his hand.

If there's one thing the Master can't bear, that's Isabelle forgets him and moves on. She had to be tied to him, and she shouldn't have grown up. By all means.

Even if her Mistress died, pity cute Isabelle should always remain his pet.

#doctor who #doctorwho fanart #doctor who fan arts #doctor who oc #dw oc #Isabelle Grace #Master #Missy #Missy and OC #Master and OC #simm!master #sim!master #dhawan master

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irepookie · 5 years

Text

INFINITY

Summary: QUEEN AU where Rog (aka Rowan Queen) is young single dad struggling to make it into music industry.

Warnings: Fluff, Fluff, Fluff, and swearing.

Word Count: 1926

Okay so this is the closest picture I could find to Row's state in the next two chapters:

Chapter 2: PIPER

Row has a lot questions to ask himself, and he knows it's on only his own future at stake, but also The Prune's, who may be getting a name.

Of all the things Rowan Queen might have aspired to be, -a Rockstar, a Roger Taylor level drummer...- a 19 year old solo dad wasn't amongst them.

All he knew was that since he had first held that small Wrinkly being and her eyes had met his, she had stolen a part of him, and that the only way to feel completed again was being with her.

Ridiculously sappy, he knew.

"But that's what makes best parents" Callie, the nurse who had introduced them assured him one day when he confessed his thoughts out loud, while he watched her sponge bath the infant "Don't feel stupid, or embarrassed for feeling that way, Row. In fact, that's exactly how it should be. Always. And those fathers who deny it or fight that connection, end up estranged from their kids as they grow up. Take it from a daughter who hasn't seen her father in 5 years"

But, alas, there he was, living between his flat and the Hospital's newborn aisle, because he just couldn't get that one girl out his head, despite don't knowing how he had come to this.

"Well I haven't seen mine in 9"

"And that scares you, don't it?"

He gasped, and nodded slowly.

"Is better having no father figure at all than having a bad one. Just like I think your Prune is luckier having one brave dad than a coward mom"

"And two fit parents?" He asked, eyes flicking to the untouched pile of adoption papers

"Well that's the ideal situation, isn't it? But the weight always ends up relaying more on the mother, you know? The father always steps back, because society still thinks it's more acceptable for us women to raise the children because, of course, we have deeper connection with 'em for carrying them around for nine months and blah blah blah." She got the towel and handed it to him before laying the squirming 2 day old In his arms.

He carefully wrapped it around her and sat down so he wouldn't drop her, then started to stroke her soft delicate skin with the towel.

"But that's bullshit." Callie continued "That's an excuse you men came up with to sneak out from changing nappies. But I believe you guys are just as capable of taking care of children as us. And that you might be the ultimate proof of it." She gathered her hair in a ponytail, and smiled at father and daughter, as Row was now

leaning back on the rocking chair with the Prune, -as all the staff had begun to call her- laid on his bare chest.

"So forget whatever prejudices you have. This kid needs you, she doesn't know nothing about what's going on, she misses her little warm oven, the voice she was so used to hear and that she'll never hear again because that world has left her behind the first chance she got and she's very confused.

But also, She doesn't know about gender stereotypes, or that she's a girl. But she knows you're here. And her instincts tell her you're safety, and warmth, and love. Sure, I'm around a lot too, but soon you'll be discharged and everything she'll have will be you. A d then she'll grow up and will be forever grateful for everything you will have done for her"

The teen nodded, taking in all the words but remaining silent. Quiet moments like this -when she was calm and content- were quite meaningful.

"I just want the best for her. And I'm not sure I am"

"Well, from where I'm standing, you're pretty much up there. Nobody gets her to settle down as quickly as you do. That has to mean something, right? Newborns have this amazing instinct of detecting sources of love and protection. And you are hers. She trusts you: trust yourself"

Days went by, and Row found himself getting up early in order to go back to hospital. At home he was restless, as questions filled his head.

Was she better off with him?

Was he ready?

How could Callie be so much more sure about the whole thing than he was?

What if be wasn't good enough

What if mom was right?

Why did he want to become a dad in the first place?

Should he just sign those papers before it was too late and forget the whole thing?

The sixth day, he made his way to the hospital as usual, but something felt off. What it was? He couldn't put a finger on it, so he shrugged it off and entered the NICU area where she was.

"Hey, lovely one, look at you, a bit bigger each day" he cooed at his yet unnamed daughter, as he put his hand through the incubator hole to let her know his ore6 "So strong and so beautiful" he smiled brightly as her small hand closed around his finger.

"Yes, this way please" he heard a male voice and turned his eyes to see a doctor and a man and a woman who were probably in their thirties

"Oh my gosh she's so tiny!" The woman exclaimed, walking towards the glass

"Who are you?" Row asked, stepping defensively in front of her before she could reach the baby.

"You must be Rowan Queen?" The man held his hand out "We're the adopting couple..."

"What?" He basically slapped it away "No! Who told you she's in for adoption?"

"Mister, you signed the adoption papers" the Doctor said

"No I didn't!"

"Yes you did. Here" the doctor looked through the pile of papers on his hands and showed him.

He snatched the file from him. That was his signature but he didn't remember signing anything. He may have doubts about being a dad, but Callie was right, the little prune and him needed each other. They belonged together And he wasn't gonna give her away. The only way was through.

"There must be a mistake. She's not up for adoption"

"Err... Yes she is" the man said

"No she's not! I should know better than you, huh?"

"We've heard about the mother. So sad. But babies need their mommys, don't they?" The woman cooed from the other side of the incubator

"You can't take her" if looks could kill, Row would have murdered her right then and there.

"Mister..."

"No! He's my daughter!"

"Sir, signing this you gave up your parental rights"

"And what the hell does that even mean?"

"Legally, she's not yours anymore"

"But I don't remember signing anything!"

"But this is your signature"

"Yes. But I... I didn't mean it"

The woman scoffed "Well you clearly did."

"Mind your fucking business!" He snapped, before turning to the doctor "Look, I really don't know how my signature is there but I need you to... I don't know, forget it, okay?"

"Forget it?"

"Yes! Whatever that stupid paper says, I'm keeping her. And I will do everything you want me to"

"Sorry. There's nothing we can do about it now. You could take this to court but... It's a lost cause"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"A 19 year old against a healthy, stable marriage?" He used the same arguments mom had

"But I'm her dad..." His voice quivered, as his baby started to cry.

"Don't worry sweetheart. Mommy and Daddy are here now" the woman said "Our Judy"

"Judy? What the fuck, you're not naming her Judy!"

"What we do with our daughter is our business, sir" the woman said "Now please, leave us alone"

"No! She's not Judy. She's my prune, I'm gonna prove to all of you fuckers wrong, because I can fucking do this if I want you. Not because I wanted to at first, or because I can't have my own kid like you; she's my own kid and she belongs with me. And I may not be a middle upper class, or drive a goddamn Mercedes, or have a huge house and a stable boring job at whatever office. And she may not have a goddamn mother, or her own room. So what? She has me. Because I'm the one who's been here for the whole bloody week worrying about her. Not you, not her mother. So fuck off and choose another kid!"

Two men who Row hadn't even seen arrive took him, as he fought and called his crying daughter "PIPER! PIPER! DADDY WILL GET YOU! I'M YOUR DAD, DON'T FORGET!"

Then he woke up with a jolt in that same hospital room, as his newborn baby awoke too beside him

He quickly sat up and leaned over to place a hand on her tummy, to check that she was real, letting out a sigh of relief when feeling her warm skin

It had been just a dream. Well, a nightmare rather than a dream. But she was there, safe next to him

"Hey, baby girl. Yes, hello darling. You had a good night? Gave trouble to the nurses?" he asked, stroking her torso "Are we hungry?" He offered his little finger,and she began to suck on it as response, which made him chuckle. "Alright, I'll call so they get us a bottle okay?"

3 minutes later, he was sitting on the green rocking chair, Baby Prune on his bare chest -because apparently skin to skin helped parents and kiddos bond or whatever- as he gave her the bottle.

He had to admit, ever since he had learned how to properly hold her, he looked forward to feeding, because he had grown to love these little moments, and by the end of them, be always felt closer and more in love with that tiny, wrinkled human being which he had helped make.

Who was a part of him somehow, and who he couldn't imagine his life without despite having only known her for 6 days.

She was so amazing. So mesmerizing. With her clear grey eyes and her peachy skin, and her adorable ears.

He just couldn't get his eyes off her.

"You're gonna come home with me in a couple days, and..." He realized he hadn't really thought about a plan. He had just moved out mom's, and the apartment was still empty. He'd have to start getting stuff. But anyway "... And we'll figure something out. I'm not gonna renounce to you. No ma'am. You've got me. And I've got you. And I'll look after you and make sure you're always happy and safe and... loved. I fucking love you so damn much and I don't even know how did this happen. I mean you're not even a week old and you've already turned my life upside down just by bloody existing. You can't even understand what I'm saying. But here I am, making all this plans and Shit... I, who never thinks ahead, who never knows his future beyond what meal he's gonna get. But I... Damn. Do you babies have like special powers or something? Do you like... Is it a defensive instinct? Like you manage to make us go nuts about you by casting a spell it whatever so we'll stay enchanted? Because this is fucking ridiculous."

She finished the bottle and he put it aside.

"Speaking about plans, we can't keep calling you Baby Prune. We're gonna have to choose a name. A pretty unique gorgeous name for a special, perfect little princess like you. So, let's see" he changed his hold on her so they were face to face. Something the nurses had called.. ? He wasn't really sure but he had got hand on it "Yes, hello" he smiled helplessly at the sight of her "Baby girl. Baby girl" he cooed absentmindedly as he analysed her features

Then he remembered his dream. He had called her Piper. He wasn't even sure if he had heard that name before but he liked it. It was original, cool, rare enough people would associate it with her but not awful, like other names he had heard.

"Piper" he whispered, tasting the word while contemplating her face. It sounded good to him. "Piper Queen" he said, a bit louder this time as her tiny hand closed around a strand of his blonde hair. "You like that? Piper?"

She just blinked, but he interpreted it as an affirmative answer

"It's settled, then. Piper. Pips for short." He smiled, and brought her back to his bare chest so he could lull her back to sleep with his rambling, which had worked the previous times.

"My Piper" he kissed her head and began to rub her back "I'm so scared honestly. I won't lie to ya, I have no idea what I'm doing but you can rely on me. I'm good at improvising so I'll figure it out. Don't worry. But you gotta take it easy, hm? If you have a bit of patience, it'll be just fine. And about this?" He reached for the papers -which were unsigned- and ripped them off "Fuck it. Just fuck it."

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

A big Hola to my dear fellow @definitely-darcy whose kind review and attention to detail has made gain confidence in this.

So, I've written this one in different bits which I've had to tie up together. Hope you guys like it.

That's about it, really. Please comment and let me know what you think (always nice and constructively).

~Pookie

#bohemian rhapsody #queen band #roger taylor #infinity fic #queen fic #queen fanfiction #queen #queen fandom #queen au #single dad! roger taylor #roger taylor daughter #roger taylor baby #ben hardy! roger taylor #irepookie #lil'prune

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toothcupdomtoothless-blog · 5 years

Text

Others of my Kind: Part One (My story for the photo prompt)

{-Hiccup wouldn't let Toothless hear him scream against the pain when the Outcasts and Alvin tortured him. He was used to physical pain from being bullied by Snotlout for as long as he could remember before they stopped the Red Death. Then, he'd had to protect Berk and life became even more painful on Berk as he and Toothless had to protect it. He'd always hidden his pain from Toothless. His now beloved Night Fury meant the world to him. He was the only one who seemed to enjoy being in his company, even after they saved Berk. He couldn't take the thought of Toothless hating him for being weak. He'd accepted his romantic feeling for Toothless months ago. He heard a rumour a couple weeks prior to their capture by the Outcasts that the dragons had humanoid forms that still had a few of their dragon features, but looked mostly like a regular human. Hiccup had considered this interesting and watched Toothless for several days after hearing it, but the dragon made no sign of having any such ability. So, he did not believe it.-}

Toothless...

{-I hear my darling Hiccup's whimpers of pain everyday. I know he's in the cell right next to me, but we haven't seen each other since we were captured a week ago. I love that little Viking in more than just a friendly way. My senses are going crazy, and I sense a faint presence that seemed to be watching us both, but I was bound and in a cell, so I couldn't investigate further. There is a rumor and yes, it is true we dragons have human-like forms, but we haven't revealed them to the people of Berk yet, because we don't know what they'd think of us. If they'd panic, if they'd think we were watching them, pretending to be their friends to find out their weaknesses and deepest, darkest secrets. I was especially worried that is what Hiccup would think since I didn't reveal my humanoid form from the beginning. He'd be hurt that I didn't show him all of me when we first became friends. I wasn't honest with him, and I regret that, deeply, I do. I know at least all his secrets, and yet he doesn't know all mine, especially that I love him romantically. How pathetic is that, I know. I, Prince Nightwind of the Night Furies--known and famous for my bravery, mind you--am to much a coward to tell my scrawny, stupidly highly smart, awkward, understanding, amazing, innocent Viking crush that I can turn into a part human and that I love him. Hiccup would understand, eventually why I kept this secret. That was one of many amazing things that was so great about him about him. That was the part that told me me that everything would be alright between us. I just wanted Hiccup to instantly be okay with me, as selfish as that sounds, being what and who I am. So fragile and special he was to me, I would not let anybody hurt him. It's funny, I never thought I would find myself fallen so hard, especially for a human. And a runt of a Viking at that. I was--sooner than I could stop it--smiling so hard and like an idiot at just the thought of Hiccup. So innocent and purity overload. I heard some of the things the Outcasts said to him when they tortured him. They teased him for being a virgin and not knowing any sexual ideals and references at his age. He's fifteen! In my culture, it's not uncommon, unheard of and it is definitely nothing to be ashamed of if you don't know those things when you're seventeen! Plus, it's not his fault that nobody liked to be around him growing, that's their loss, he's an incredible being. In short, he had no one to teach him these things. Except maybe Gobber, but by the way my dear friend Rock (her bulky Rider called her Meatlug) described the way he taught the teens in dragon training, I definitely don't blame Hiccup for not going to him for help and advice on this subject. It wouldn't have been much help anyway, because his teaching style is turn them loose on it and let them figure it out on their own. Being new to it, it would make sense that just doing it with no clue what to do would scare him, and so would any sort of intimacy. You could not say I was wrong. Even when we were together and he was showing me his form of affection, which I probably enjoy way too much, he won't get anywhere near my stomach because he knows at the bottom is my sheath for my cock. I want him to touch me, and I want to touch him. His cock, I never seen, he never lets me see him undressed or in the process of doing so and I hate it. I understand he's shy, though. So, no he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to show me. At least, I hope it won't come to that...I am almost at my dragon's body's limit to exhaustion where I'll be forced to turn back into a human, though...-}

Hiccup...

{[I am not happy that I haven't gotten to see Toothless for a week and I don't know whether or not Alvin kept his word to abstain from harming him if I didn't fight back. He is called Alvin the Treacherous. I'll be able to see for myself today, apparently, though, because Alvin said that for keeping my word, he'd let me see my dragon for a few hours in the same cell as a 'reward' for handling my 'lessons' so well. He made it perfectly clear, though that the guards would be returning to beat me in front of him, then take me away from him forever. They were laughing about how my new captor had 'special plans' for me once he had me in his clutches. I knew what they were saying. I was to be raped, and Toothless could do nothing to save me from my captor, because he would never find me. I tried to remain optimistic that Toothless and I would find a way to escape in the few hours we would have together. No matter how hard I tried, things seemed to remain bleak, that outcome becoming less and less likely in my mind, the guards were right and that would be my future, and his would be uncertain. I just hope he finds escape simpler without me.-?

Guard 1: Come, you dragon boy?

Guard 2: Yer reptile's waiting for your arrival.

{-I stood, weakly, and they, picking to grab me on the back of my neck, marched me to the cell adjacent to mine and opened the door and shoved my weak body onto the ground. The closed and locked the cell door. They didn't need to bind me, I in too much pain to stand again, I'm amazed I could just moments ago. The guards walked away as I attempted to roll onto my side from my belly to be able to see Toothless and have a semi-easier time breathing than on my front side. Rolling (had I already been on my back) was one thing I could actually accomplish without the pain when I used my arms. I pushed myself up in absolute pain, but I pursed my lip and fought off the urge to produce a sound, even a slight hiss from the pain. I swerved and managed to sit against a wall, where it escaped my lips, a loud wince and I couldn't stop my hand from covering my ribs. I felt the sharp pools of toxic green on me and I looked up without hesitation to meet the gaze of my muscular, sleek dragon staring intently--no boring intrestedly in me. I hadn't laid eyes on his black-scaled chassis for days, a week, much less his entrancing eyes. I managed a weak smile, that grew from ear-to-ear, me no longer caring how much pain it would surely inflict and put upon me. I was just so happy to see him. Adrenaline filled me as I stood--very weakly and painfully--shaking. My great Night Fury looked to me smiling his signature TOOTHLESS smile.-}

Toothless...

{-Here they come, they're bringing Hiccup to me. The two burly Outcasts unlocked the cell door and shoved him to the ground inside my cell after they'd held the back of his neck so hard, it would definitely leave a bruise. They carelessly forced him to the floor and LEFT, locking the cell door behind on the way out. I knew they'd be coming to check on us in a half-hour. Hiccup was in pretty bad shape, he was bleeding, bruised and that was just his dorsal side. I knew he was in immense pain, but he rolled and swerved into a sitting position anyway. He let out a sound before he could stop it of agonizing pain and held his rib/side. I roared, concerned about him, but he met my piercing gaze without hesitate and forced through the pain to smile at me. Seriously, was he happy even though he knew I could tell he was in excruciating pain? Was he happy to see me that much? I gave him my signature Toothless grin which had earned me my name given by Hiccup himself. He smiled ear-to-ear, not caring about his pain. I loved this human, of this I am sure. Standing to on his prosthetic leg and the real one, still smiling-}

Hiccup: Hey, bud, (shyly) I'm so glad you're alright...

{-Did he just say that with the amount of pain he's in? Oh no, I feel dizzy and numb and weak. Hiccup can tell that my eyes are going in and out of focus and has the nerve to ask if I am okay and my eyes go blurry and I can feel my bones changing and the magic dust forming around me. Well, at least this way, Hiccup can see it first-hand. It takes about half of a minute before I hear the dust settle down and stop feeling my bones change. I look back up at Hiccup, my eyes becoming less and less blurry and finally coming back into sharp focus where I can plainly see Hiccup with a curious and concerned--not frightened face. I am in shock, I thought he wouldn't accept this. Suddenly, I see him push his undoubtedly burning with pain arms to get him off the wall and struggles to maintain his balance as he struggles to advance towards me without falling, he is shaking uncontrollably--in apprehension and absolute fear, no doubt. I just now realize that the Outcasts left my mouth uncovered, and my snout and face unbound and what I'm about to do next, I've practiced so I'm not so awkward at it. Trust me, I would've died of embarrassment..-}

Human-like Me: Hiccup...

{-That stopped him dead in his tracks and he looked at me like he'd been for the past three minutes, only his eyes were full of pain, concern, sadness and regret--four emotions I never wanted to see Hiccup's face embody. The next thing I knew, tears were flowing from his eyes in thin, steady streams. No...-}

Hiccup...

{/Did he just...oh my gooooooods, he just talked to me, he just said my name. I looked again into his eyes--I'd been unable to imagine that Toothless would be able to have actual conversation with little, scrawny me. Ever since I heard that rumor and even after I'd deduced it to be just a silly rumor floating, I'd always wondered if it had been true, what would Toothless be like...What would his personality around me be like from then on? I imagined and that made me wonder even more..one of the things I mulled over and over in my brain was if he could talk to me, what would he sound like? What kind of tone would I hear and how would he say things to, well, ME...? Full of dread and disgust since he could finally voice how much he must resent me for shooting him down and taking away his tailfin? I still hadn't gotten over that by the way. For RIDING him! He must definitely hate me for that, I'd always assumed. Being demeaned and dishonored and undignified in such a way by a fishbone of a human, no less! I continued to stare, well aware that my eyes were pouring tears. His voice, so smoothly even and masculine and authoritated...it was laced with compassion, concern and loving for me...for me, how is that possible? This WAS Toothless!--}

Toothless...

{-He isn't saying anything, just standing there, eyes wide, but he's still looking at me, not scrambling backwards. Whew, that's good. Seriously, though, say SOMETHING, Hiccup! You're torturing me! (Imagine the GIF above as his state of mind thinking this as well as Hiccup's mind with his non-existent self-like and self-esteem, even) I seriously hope he doesn't hate me for this. I don't think my heart could take Hiccup hurting it by hating me or being hurt by me! Let me break the ice here, as humans say. Or try to..!-]

Myself: You know, I always wanted you to stare at me, but not in this way. It is kinda rude.

{-Cutie Hiccup blushed and seemed shocked back to reality, he looks down, still blushing of embarrassment.....gods, I wanted him. I meant that in more than a pure way, obviously. I have to concentrate, I totally feel the growing of my bulge. Shit, now that I have a humanoid form, I no longer have a sheath containing it, which means Hiccup will be able to see it, my boner/erection. Finally, Hiccup mumbles something inaudible to me and I give him a 'seriously' look and he chuckles slightly. Time goes by where we simply looked at each other and the guards came back twice already to check on us and tease Hiccup some more. What the h*l* are they talking about, new master who had 'unconventional' activities for him to perform? Another check where we got lost in each other's eyes.-}

Me: Hiccup, you know you can get closer to me, I won't ever chew something off of you, even if I could. (shrug)

{-That got his attention, and he seemed to zero in on my leather bonds. He also got closer, but his curious eyes were locked onto my bonds, I right now feel kind of jealous of the rough leather restricting my movement. Hiccup got close enough to me where I could reach my arms out and wrap them around him if I could move them. He is at most two inches from me and reaches his hand slowly, carefully to my arm and the leather binding it. He feels it for the buckle, and I suddenly realize what he's doing. He is trying to free me just like last time! He follows the tightened strap to the front and finds what he's looking for--he's looking for a way to free me! Hiccup looks up at me apologetically and whispers the next thing so that only I can hear. Yes, Hicc...do share with me, your best friend.-}

Hiccup: I'm sorry, bud.

{-Sorry? What the f*** exactly is he sorry for? He turns back to the buckle and pulls it tighter, what? I look down at him in confusion, it didn't necessarily hurt me too much, but what was Hiccup talking about?-}

Hiccup: So sorry if that hurts, bud, I'm trying to undo this buckle and it'll be easier if I have the fastened ends together.

Me (having forgotten about my new ability to speak): Why didn't you just say so?

{-Hiccup makes a shocked face that was priceless, just as the buckle snaps undone from his careful handiwork, quietly, so it doesn't draw the guards' attention. Now free to wiggle my arms that were still tied around my back, I shake off the stiffness in them by doing just that. Hiccup's face still hasn't changed. Apparently, I wasn't the only one who'd already forgotten about my improved vocalization. Hiccup blushes even brighter, it is so adorable! I guess, we've just always been able to read each other's body language and signals, because that was the only way we could learn to communicate. Hiccup learned how to read me as a Night Fury, but not as a person, because he's never had to. Now, I could tell he was confused and a little scared, honestly, because I learned how to read him as a human, as Hiccup and he doesn't have a second form. I understand his point of view completely. It was the reaction I expected, after all. I look back up to Hiccup with my toxic green eyes and he's biting his bottom lip, blushing uncontrollably. It is taking a fucking lot of will power to restrain myself right now. He'd stopped the straps tying me from falling to the floor and making a lot of noise. I also just now realize that I can now move and walk about my cell, freely, that is, I could, if my ankles had not been buckled together, putting me in an awkward, humiliating stance just to be able to stand up. Those had the only straps that bound me to stay stationary, now that the one around my arms that held me tight with the ceiling were gone. Hiccup must have realized this. He gulps and lowers himself softly to his knees, careful not to make too much noise. He works quickly and carefully to unbind my ankles. I watch and admire him for getting so close to something that made him so nervous. Also, working through agonizing pain must be straining him. Hiccup stays silent as he works and barely manages to unbuckle that strap binding my ankles, and I stood to my full height, which must have scared or startled Hiccup, because he takes several steps backwards. I look down to him, tilting my head, curiously. It's taking every single fiber of my self-control not to say something dirty to him and pin him, taking him, fuck him against the cell's rock wall. Hey, my hands may still be bound...but I have some--a lot of practice, I could get it done.-}

Hiccup (haven't heard from him in a while)...

{-Why's he looking at me like that? What's going on here? It'll only be a few minutes before the next guard check, so, I better get moving on those tied hands. Toothless continues to watch me, letting his still feral slit eyes taking in every detail of weak, fishbone me, give me several once-overs. How did he see me now? As a human? Most likely, he's masking his desires to slit my throat or strangle me as a hands-on...no, no, not now, Hiccup, focus. Now that I know he can talk, it's like torture that he won't say a word to me, even they're hateful. Why do I wish his hands were on me? No! Bad Hiccup, focus on getting you both out of here alive! I make my way around him and pick up the knot gently in my hands that binds him, so it wouldn't hurt him. I try to undo the knot for a good three minutes and got it almost there, but Toothless still isn't able to freely use his arms, when one of the two Outcast guards shouted at me...-}

Guard 1: Hey!

Toothless...

{-Hiccup was just standing there, clearly nervous by the way I looked at him. I continued eye-fucking him until he managed to move around me and start on the cloth knot tying my hands. So dedicated, I loved the feeling of Hiccup wanting so badly to free me from the bonding factors. So, I really like--love him. All the sudden, the guards came back as he almost got the knot, and one yelled at him, halting him in his actions and before he knew it, they were in the cell and chasing after him, axes raised and I roared at them. I distracted one and gave him a good kick to the nutsack for having the balls to treat such an amazing being with such disrespect. I looked over briefly to see the other guard standing over Hiccup who was balled up on the floor while the guard was kicking him in the stomach, I was so angry, I was seeing red and was about to jump him when the guard I knocked down lunged at me and grabs me around the torso just under my raised arms and held me as the other guard gave me a sinister smirk and grabbed Hiccup by the back of the neck and hoisted him up into the air and carried him over to me. Oh, no don't tell me he's going to--}

Guard 1: Watch this, freak--!

Hiccup: (groans, boredly; rolls eyes)

Guard 2: Oh...that's right. Pain is nothing new or unbearable and utterly miserable to the little bugger. He's felt it most of his life, after all. Ah, well, it'll make me feel good, you?

Guard 1: Definitely, so would you like to do the first honors?

Guard 2: And give you a go afterwards, of course!

{-I struggle against the burly Outcast guard holding me. Had my hands been unbound, they would both be dead. As the one holding on to Hiccup which wasn't difficult, landed/ administer and pulled back each blow, my anger and bloodthirst grew. Suddenly, Hiccup made a move and as the guard dug his nails into the opposite side of his neck, Hiccup sunk his teeth into the guard's arm and apparently a big, muscled man can't take a bite from a little teenager who drew blood, apparently, and he dropped Hiccup from his other hand, pulling back to cradle his 'wounded' arm, please, just look at Hiccup. The small boy didn't waste time complaining, though and bolted, barely letting himself stumble to the floor. The guard holding me offered, but the guard chasing Hiccup screamed at him to keep me still. They're afraid, as they should be, hmph...-}

Hiccup: Come get me!

Guard: Get back here, you piece of--! Oh no!!!!!

{Hiccup had ran and ducked under my arms after I lunged forward, still imprisoned in my captor's arms. Hiccup grabbed mine and kept them in place as the guard's axe came down, then SLICE was the only sound I heard as the blade had freed my hands, cutting clean through what remained of the knot perfectly in half.

Hiccup, you scrawny genius! With the last of my bonds gone, I felt my strength kick in and Hiccup had already gotten ahead of me to free me from the captor guard and kicked him in his dick. He doubled over, releasing me from his hold and whining loudly in pain. The other guard trembled as I advanced and I quickly disarmed him and slid the axe over to Hiccup with my foot. Hiccup got it and blocked the guard's blows with the flat end of the axe. Once I had finished the one I was fighting in mere seconds, I leap over to Hiccup and instantly block the other guard's blows to him and give him a real and short fight for his skin, which he lost in even less seconds than his companion and I turned back to Hiccup who was lying on his back--no, wait, ahem, SITTING on the floor trying to get up, but I 'tch' at him, twice and he watches me closely leaning backwards a little as I lean my face closer to him. Our faces are inches apart and my right arm has stopped him from leaning back any further and Hiccup's knees were still bent in a propped position, which made it easy for me to sweep my left arm under his knees and lift him with me as I stand. There's no way I'll try to have him push himself further, at least I hope so...he's mumbling in protest, but really, even though a part of me thinks it's cute, I really don't give a shit whether he thinks I can't tell that he's too weak to walk.-}

So, I carry him silently out of the cell and past all the others filled with ACTUAL criminals and outside. I sense that presence again, now it's overwhelming! Oh no...it's...it's my kind...THEY found us! I take my stance to take off, but then realize I can't operate my tailfin, shit. Now, I have to make Hiccup utilize it in his condition.-}

Me: Psst, Hiccup.

Hiccup: (gasps slightly when I talk) Y-yes, s-s-sir?

{-Sir, what the f**'!?!! I'll ask later. I HAVE to get us out of here and safely back to Berk, but if we leave now, it'll take longer for them to find us.-}

Me: I need you to get on my back and operate my tailfin. I can't use this one on my own.

Hiccup: (realizes) Oh...

{-Without any questions, Hiccup obeys me and climbs over me, adjusting in my still attached saddle and making sure he is secured to the saddle and his prosthetic in the proper position, quick in only a few seconds, he bent his foot backwards and in turn opens the tailfin. Silently, I crouch again and leap, flapping my wings, taking us away from Outcast Island back to Berk, so at least Hiccup wouldn't have to navigate. As I fly, Hiccup is silently adjusting himself, as he seemed not to be able to get into any comfortable position and I assumed, he needed time to absorb the fact that his Night Fury could actually turn into a human-like form. Hours seem to slowly pass before I finally see the telltale giant torches that signify we've entered the ocean air space of Berk and I climb higher, to rise above the rooftops quite a ways so I won't set one on fire when I do this!-}

Me: (shoot plasma blast and roar)

Hiccup (startled): Oh my--! (faint)

{-The villagers race out of their homes to see me gently glide down and land in my humanoid form. Astrid and Stoick push their way to the front as I finally touch down. Before they can say anything from their open mouths, Gothi comes forward, as I was hoping and I gently slide/take Hiccup back into my arms and reveal his injured body to the old woman to see. She is covering his face from the view of the other villagers. Hiccup stirs at her touch, remembering it as familiar and he slowly blinks his eyes up at her wrinkled facade.-}

Hiccup (weakly): Gothi...?

{-His father must have heard this, so he rushed to us, me still crouched slight over him and gently nudged Gothi slightly to the side so she could still get her hands to him, but Stoick got a good look at his son. Hiccup turns his head to him and gazes at his dad. Stoick cries in relief and I reluctantly let Stoick take him from my arms. Stoick backs up only slightly-}

Stoick: Just who are you--?

{-We stood. No doubt it was the question everyone had towards me until Hiccup, still able to reach me, grabbed my arm. I looked at his face and it showed nothing but pure joy, happiness-relief that I was safe and alive with him.-}

Hiccup (scratchy; loudly): T-Too--Tooth--less...

{-I smile at him and chuckle, tears running down from my eyes in absolute relief. I take his face in my hands and he looks at my face.-}

Me: It's okay, Hiccup. We're okay.

{-I know right now, everybody else must be confused as fucking shit, but I don't care about them right now. I cup his face. Hiccup was the only person who mattered to me in my life.-}

Me (tears streaming): Hiccup...you saved us. Saved us both. We wouldn't have escaped had you not pushed yourself through, disregarding your own pain to save me and still trusted me, even after I transformed into my human-like form that you had no way of knowing about enough to undo my bonds. You've been here for me every single day.

Hiccup (coughing): Just like I've been since the beginning, Bud...you, you couldn't have done anything while you were bound, I don't blame you for that. You cannot blame yourself.

Me: That's kind of hard when you wouldn't let yourself make any sound of pain while you were being tortured in the cell right next to mine--so close, but I couldn't get to you to save you from more injury--except for slight whimpers.

Hiccup: But you were there for me and saved me when it really counted.

Toothless: Just like I've always been since that day you released me and then the next, you completely persisted to bug the absolute fuck out of me. (slight chuckle..)

Hiccup (forlornly): Oh...I'm sorry...

Me: No, no, I'm happy you did, otherwise I wouldn't have seen what a wonderful being you are!

{-Hiccup makes the next move, returning my affectionate action and cupping my face gently. We pressed our foreheads together and I signalled the Riders' dragons to transform. They all looked at each other in worried glances, yet they obeyed.-}

Rock: Ah...have to admit, it does feel nice to be able to tell them.

Flare: Yeah...

Twin 2: Yeah, now that Prince Nightwind has transformed in front of his human, we can all tell our beloved Rider teens the truth.

Twin 1 (pointing to the Riders, who are slack-jawed): Well, we know one thing for sure, we've struck them speechless...

{-Indeed, the teens did hold shocked expressions and their jaws seemed to hang, limply. All I cared about right now was that Hiccup was finally safe at home, we both were...that is until Stoick, well, yanked Hiccup away from me in his arms and turned before either of us could say anything in protest and followed Gothi up to her cottage, followed by Gobber, with a sour expression. Shit...Hiccup was probably right, Stoick had been naturally angry for many years. Hopefully, he was wrong about it being since the day he was born...I watched as my love was carried away from me and I was left, longingly gazing after him...the Riders cleared their throats. I turned to them as they crossed their arms, clearly expecting an explanation. Well...ffffffffuuuuuckkkkkk...-}

End of Part One...

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aegor-bamfsteel · 6 years

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Yo man, I hear that the Blackfyres and their supporters were Conservative, sexist, brutish usurpers who couldn't stand to see a feminist king on the throne but here you are, an honest to God bra burning, women's lit thumping feminist unironically supporting the Black Dragon. In this entire fandom you're the only person I've found openly supporting them. If you don't mind me asking, why do you like them so much?

Hey dude, you’re asking me to talk about sexism, fandom hypocrisy, and my Blackfyre love in an inflammatory way that could result in getting me in trouble with the fandom? I probably shouldn’t be answering this, but ok. This has been sitting in my inbox for a week, and let no one say that I leave any ask unanswered. Wankery found under the cut:

Eyy dude, what if I told you that the perception of Blackfyres as sexist, brutish usurpers in fandom is largely due to some prominent people’s intellectual elitism and projection of neoliberal political views? Aspects of GRRM’s writing like the unreliable narrator, villains-are-heroes-from-another-side, and history is written by the “victors” are given no credibility in favor of condemning the Blackfyre supporters as racist, sexist, and ableist (?) in fandom. I’m extremely annoyed that no one seems to be asking the sort of questions or making the sort of connections that I have due to this blanket ban on Blackfyre sympathy. I’ve answered your broader question on why I supported the Blackfyres in an earlier ask (they were more honorable, less absolutist and cruel than the Targaryens, even demonstrated some meritocracy, and most died horrifically) so I will try to answer based on the sexism angle: How come I like the Blackfyres so much and support woman’s liberation at the same time?

First of all, you come into my askbox and tell me that Daeron II was a feminist king? Nah bro. A real male feminist ally in a position of power would’ve passed laws to ensure his father’s predatory behavior would be banned. He would’ve been trying to apologize for the way he and his father treated the Bracken sisters and actively sought to make amends instead of making the situation worse. He could’ve given widows a pension or granted certain protections to mothers with illegitimate children. He could’ve opened up exit shelters for prostituted women wanting to learn a trade, as Empress Theodora did back in sixth century AD Byzantium. Why does fandom think he is so Feminist™ when he did so little for women? Are they referring to him having Princess Elaena as an unofficial advisor while her husband Ronnel Penrose was Master of Coin, a man who could barely string two numbers together? (Which really undermines the claim that Daeron was a reformer who chose wise men as councilors, since he selected an incompetent based on his own family status) Might I remind everyone that Daeron arranged Elaena’s second marriage in the first place, a woman 3 years his elder who had been locked in prison for 11 years by her brother, bore illegitimate twins by her cousin, forced to wed an old man by her uncle/Aegon, and may have been forced into sleeping with the horrific Aegon IV? You’d think after enduring so much at the hands of her male relatives, the Kind™ Daeron would’ve backed off, but she has to pay for his son Aerys’ failed marriage by sacrificing her hard-won independence. How feminist. But I guess it’s OK, because after Ronnel died Daeron generously gave his blessing when she wed someone she truly loved! I can’t imagine she felt much affection for this entitled shit. But maybe the Great Fandom Minds™ are referring to how Daeron treated his wife Myriah, who is a blank slate in terms of personality and political actions? I can’t even think of any other names of women Daeron might’ve canonically “empowered”, so how exactly is he a feminist? And why does thinking he was a self-serving politician who treated all of his family members except his sons like expendable trash make me sexist? Do tell, Fandom Minds who know so much more than I.

By contrast, how does liking Daemon Blackfyre and thinking he’d be a better king than Daeron make one sexist? Eustace Osgrey said that he hung out with warriors rather than septons and women, but GRRM himself said that Daemon did have female followers (some we know even participated in the Second Blackfyre Rebellion, like Ladies Vyrwell and Smallwood. Not to mention the cause owes its continued strength after Redgrass to Queen Rohanne) who were “drawn to him.” There’s the rumors that Daemon thought that he could marry Princess Daenerys and Rohanne of Tyrosh, but even the biased Maester Yandel said that claim only developed long after the wedding from a few Blackfyre supporters, which is a few steps removed from the original source. I believe that version of the story was an attempt by the Westerosi Blackfyre supporters to acknowledge Rohanne of Tyrosh’s invaluable contributions to the cause of the exiles while still maintaining the romanticism of a Daemon/Daenerys forbidden romance. It absolutely blows my mind that Daemon gets more flak for what he might have said at fourteen than Daeron does for helping a teenaged girl and her two-week-old son get banished for something her father said. Because Daeron is called “the Good” and thus incapable of doing wrong, obviously.

But outrageously, the fandom has to headcanon abusive behavior on Daemon to make him look like a villain. Seriously, I’ve heard people claim he was an abusive father to Daemon II, cheated on or never loved Rohanne, would have killed his nephews, and tried to rape Princess Daenerys based on no canonical evidence (in fact, the evidence goes against the honorable father of at least nine presented in canon). Even a Daemon-hater like Yandel had to concede that Daemon’s love was for the mother of his children to whom he was married for 12 years. Daemon died protecting his son Aegon from the Raven’s Teeth arrows; he’d never hurt his children. As for the children of others, his faction during the First Blackfyre did not kill children (in fact, Quentyn Ball spared Lady Penrose’s youngest son, some say on Daemon’s orders), especially not those too young to fight. The fandom’s portrayal of Daemon as a vicious monster really serves to emphasize how little evidence they have that Daeron II was a truly good person; the man with grudges against two of his father’s underaged rape victims isn’t a hero, so they have to make his rival an even bigger villain despite it being complete nonsense in canon? Can I have at least a balanced depiction of a Daemon who loved his wife and kids, even if they do think he was an ambitious reactionary?

An especially infuriating piece of fandom hypocrisy is that to make Daemon sexist, they have to demonize or erase all of the female influence in his life. Example one is that for his first 12 years, he was raised as the son of Daena the Defiant, who GRRM said in an SSM raised him alone in the Red Keep. Some people in fandom claim she was an ambitious woman who wanted a son so she could be Aegon’s Queen over Naerys, which is a claim so insulting in its wrongness (Daena could’ve been Queen in her own right, having an illegitimate son actually hurt her chances of queenship and a stable future, she referred to Daemon as hers alone so she never wanted to acknowledge his father, she never agreed to wed a man after Baelor, etc) I’m shocked the people who make it can call themselves feminists with a straight face. Others are kinder toward the Daena-Daemon relationship, saying that Daena must’ve died before Daemon was four so she couldn’t pass on her ideals of honor and self-sacrifice for one’s children; this completely ignores what GRRM said about Daena “raising” Daemon alone, meaning he knew her well enough to remember her. Both these ideas about Daena either demonize one of the most beautiful mother-son pairs in Targaryen history (she loved that kid so much she put him ahead of her own reputation and chance at being Queen. I cry.) or they take away her influence in order to claim that Daemon had no female role models growing up. A mother like Daena, strong-willed, independent, a sportswoman, would’ve doubtless have shaped Daemon’s opinions on women, and especially on mothers of bastards. He may have grown up knowing a woman didn’t necessarily need a husband to be happy, that she could shoot and ride as well as a man, and that a princess could with smallfolk and minor nobles on her own. She was far away from a submissive woman and was Daemon’s sole parent until he was 12, and you mean to tell me her son was a raging misogynist? Nope, I don’t buy it.

Fandom also erases Daemon’s other important female figure: Rohanne of Tyrosh. Elite Tyroshi women are most similar to elite Dornishwomen out of all the ladies of Westeros; I say this because the Archon’s daughter was to serve as a cupbearer for Prince Doran without having been betrothed to Quentyn, indicating that they are valued as political actors for their families outside of marriage alliances. Tyrosh is a mercantile society where the elites don’t like to fight, which traditionally equalizes roles between the sexes. Rohanne was the reason the Blackfyre cause survived for so long; she didn’t need help from Bittersteel escaping to her own fucking country, rather the landless Blackfyre supporters needed her protection after they lost everything at Redgrass. Without her giving them a stable base of operations (and certainly using her dowry to pay for their accommodations), they wouldn’t have been cohesive enough for Aegor to create the Golden Company. I realize that Rohanne has very little canonical characterization, but neither do Princess Daenerys and Myriah Martell, and that doesn’t stop Fandom from writing fanfics and meta on these two while ignoring Rohanne. On a similar note, prominent meta writers claim that the Blackfyre cause is obviously based on the Jacobites (no, Daemon Blackfyre was based in part on James Scott the Duke of Monmouth, who was staunchly anti-Jacobite. Just because these writers don’t know about British history in depth doesn’t mean that they can make spurious claims), and use this comparison to make headcanons for how the Blackfyre court in exile operated. For some Unfathomable reason, these headcanons never include the invaluable contributions that the female Stuarts made to the cause; Queen Mary and Princess Louisa were much more popular than the charmless James II and the drunken womanizer Charles III, having great relations with the French court and funding the education of the daughters of Jacobite exiles (it was said that even Queen Anne wept when Princess Louisa died, for she had hoped to wed her son to him). For a fandom who loves to make headcanons about minor female asoiaf characters, and loves to show off its (rather one-dimensional) knowledge of history, I see no such fics and metas for the female Blackfyres. I guess Feminism™ can’t be wasted on the wives and daughters of “traitors.” Just ask Sansa Stark.

To conclude, Daeron II was not a feminist king who raised the status of women in Westeros; in fact, he used his power as prince and king to banish Barba Bracken and wed Princess Elaena off to an ally. Daemon Blackfyre was raised by a strong single mother and was successfully married to an older foreign woman, and enjoyed female support for his cause, so calling him a misogynist seems like a leap to me. I’d make the argument that it’s Fandom with the misogyny problem, as they ignore the suffering, contributions, and characterization of female characters they don’t like in order to prop up a “sexism” narrative that contradicts canon. Just because other people bleat about how sexist, racist, and ableist Blackfyre supporters like me are, it doesn’t mean it’s true.

#Angry #fandom critical #asoiaf #house Blackfyre #anti Daeron II

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