I'm not going to post the video but I've seen so many horrifying examples of people cutting, chopping, slicing food in a very bad way. I just saw a tiktok of a person slicing onions in a manner I legitimately worried the video was going to end with blood.
So I'm here to beg you all to PLEASE work on bettering your knife skills in the kitchen. You don't need high end $200+ knives (but you do need a basic sharp chef knife - a dull knife is extremely dangerous. Get a decent diy sharpener to keep on hand)
There's plenty of great how to videos out there like ones from American Test Kitchen and Alton Brown's Good Eats.
You can practice slicing, dicing, etc on apples, onions, carrots, zucchini. Hell make a loaded vegetable soup to practice different cutting methods! (probably leave the apple out of that though) if you take your time every time you cook to work on at least one knife skill you'll have perfected it in no time, trust me. And then not only will your food look good, you'll have uniformed cooking times, be less likely to slip and cut yourself, but will also be far quicker in the kitchen then you realize.
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How about some person (albeit OC, generic, or anyone), being interrogated for being suspected to be a spy? (Whether they are is up to you)
Who Did You Meet?
(tw: dubon touch, dubcon kiss, fingore, hand whump, knife, blood, ruining a perfectly good table, poor knife safety)
“Who did you meet last night?”
Whumpee almost flickered to a stop at the question, but they kept the knife moving smoothly, slicing perfect quarters of tomato. “...who? It was just me - Lance left around closing.”
“No - I mean after that.” Whumper trailed around the island, fingers ghosting across the countertop. “After you left the office.”
The memories flickered unbidden across their mind. Slipping out into the alley. Folder tucked under their blazer. Getting into the dark car.
Chatting.
Updating.
Informing.
Passing off what they’d learned about Whumper’s routines and work as discreetly as possible before they were dropped back off, slipped into their car, and headed back home to their mark.
Whumper couldn’t have seen that - they were at the game…right?
Right. Just teasing.
They like to make Whumpee squirm.
Whumpee sputtered a laugh, swiping the chopped pieces into a bowl and starting on onions. “I met up with you, silly~” they threw Whumper a wink.
This had to be teasing. Just flirting.
They eased a little as Whumper smirked a warm laugh, stepping behind them.
Whumpee leaned into the kiss that Whumper nuzzled against their jaw. They nuzzled back before redirecting their attention to the onion they were chopping, ignoring the all-too-familiar curl of panic in their stomach as Whumper’s all-too-familiar hand slipped up their neck to grip their jaw lightly.
The way they hummed in appreciation, tipping their head back to give more access rather than flinching away was all-too-familiar, too.
The knife burned in their hand. Whumpee could practically feel it searing. Humming. Begging to be used.
They shoved down the instinct.
Whumpee giggled quietly, biting their lip as Whumper’s kiss worked down the side of their neck. “I can’t seeeeee,” they teased.
Whumper just nipped the skin there. “You don’t have to - you’re an expert with a knife, aren’t you?”
Alarm bells that hadn’t yet turned off demanded attention yet again, blaring in the back of their mind. The knife burned. Its weight was off-blanace in their hand. Not a well made piece. Not at all like the ones they’d used in training.
This was just for cooking. That’s what its weight and shape were destined for.
Yet, it begged them for blood.
Whumpee ignored the burn.
They laughed, trying poorly to guide the knife around - using their knuckles as a guide to keep the blade safely away from fingertips.
They sliced down - fairly neatly.
“There- see? Expert.” Whumper’s smile grew against Whumpee’s neck.
There wasn’t any possible way Whumper could know.
This was just a tease. Just a coincidence. Even a test to see if Whumpee would crack if they were a plant. Which they weren’t. That’s the part they were playing. Not a spy. Great part. Very elaborate.
Whumpee tried to turn a kiss to Whumper’s cheek, but the grip on their jaw tightened, keeping them in place.
Whumpee froze as Whumper’s grip on their waist tightened, too.
“..um…Whumper?”
“Hmm?” Breath tickling their ear.
Whumpee’s stomach curled as they stared straight up at the ceiling. Exactly how Whumper put them.
Burning. Burning. Burning.
“..wh..what are you…-”
The blade demanded action. It longed for Whumpee to plunge it into Whumper’s flesh just as strongly as their legs, itched, begging them to run.
“-You didn’t answer my question,” they purred against the shell of Whumpee’s ear, warmth tingling across the skin and shivering down their spine.
“..I…wh-at question..?”
Whumper chuckled softly, nipping the lobe. “Who did you share all those pretty little secrets with last night?”
Fuck.
Caught.
Definitely caught.
Shit.
They couldn’t ignore the burning anymore.
In one smooth motion, Whumpee twisted, knife turning deftly between their fingers and sailing straight for Whumper’s face.
It’s strange how the body moves when afraid. It’s slippery. Jittery. Off balance. Strange how even one minute motion can send you spiraling in the wrong direction - redirected and reframed. The smallest flick of a wrist suddenly had Whumpee spinning wrong.
A hand bruising into their hip had them reeling back.
The rough wood of the table against their back had them bending. Falling.
Staring up at the ceiling.
Staring at Whumper
Eyes wide and frantic as they tried to roll away-
But the knife still burned for blood - and when it met their hand again, the wrong side greeted them.
Wrongness and screeching agonies ripped through their palm, shredding flesh from tendon from bone until the blade was lodged firmly into the table, their blood soaking into the fresh crevice.
Incredulity and distilled horror slotted through Whumpee’s throat, choking them as they stared up at the skewered appendage, mind trying to process the wrongness. The knife burned - burned so badly, twinging whitehot electricity up through their tendones at every twitch and shiver that choked out the sound that begged to scrabble from their throat.
Whumpee barely had a chance to process it before Whumper slammed their other wrist down by it.
“Let’s try this one more time…” Whumper’s free hand gripped Whumpee’s jaw again, bruising deep against the bone as they forced Whumpee’s gaze to them.
“Who did you meet?”
(tags: @prisonerwhump @whumpawink @mabledonut @happy-little-sadist @paleassprince @distinctlywhumpthing @wibbly-wobbly-whump @batfacedliar-yetagain @suspicious-whumping-egg @wormwriting @meowsikbox @villainsvictim @throwawaywhumper @wild-selenite-caffine @whumpasaurus101 @thecitythatdoesntsleep @whumpworld @cryptidhongo @rose-pinkie @whumpberry-cookie @rainbows-and-whumperflies @astralrunic @cursedscribbles @shywhumpauthor)
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