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#just a compilation of cliches
lilisouless · 1 year
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"The crows chilling and watching tv"
Nina: can you imagine how our lives would be if we were on a fantasy tv show? I would be the main character of course, the choosen one with a great hidden power that is also revealed to be royalty and the daugther of a god and a demon. Don't forget that everyone falls in love with me instantly, just like in real life.
Matthias: and i would be your one true love
Kaz: please! you would be killed on the first episode
Matthias: hey!
Kaz: come on, you have "fridged to cause angst to the main character" all over your face. And i know that because , as the main villain, i am the one who killed you.
Nina: I will avenge you,Matthias!
Jesper: are you going to be the "evil incarnate" villain , or the "not evil just missunderstood" villain
Kaz: This writers will try to make me both, will result in fans loving me and justifying all my horrible actions just because i had a sad backstory. Nina will sucessfully kill me and the end of the first season, but after the ratings fall because the other villains are not compelling (traslation: played by old and unnatractive people), they will bring me back with no explanation in a desesperate move to got the views back.
Jesper: Wait, isn't Jesper , Nina´s handsome and charismatic bff enought to catch some views?
Kaz: They love you, as long as you don't overstep your role as "comic relief" , they won't like it if you take some agency or do anything else than being Nina´s support
Wylan: hey, Jesper is way more than that
Kaz: He could be if the writers bother to develop him, but don't get sad, he will have more screentime than you for sure. As the supporting character for a supporting character , your only job is be Jesper´s boyfriend
Jesper: Yeah, they can't have two gay main characters. It´s always a main one and their minor character partner; they probably won't let you even exist if i am not onscreen with you. And the show needs to be called "ground breaking" in terms of representation so, they can either show us as human beings ...or have a borderline inapropiate sex scene (but the people playing us will be on their twentys so it´s okay) which is more likely. Maybe by season 4 people will begin to demand more from you...
Inej: And thats when you become unbereable, Wylan. By "developing your relationship" the writers will understand "make is as unbereable as possible" , with you becoming a nag, slut shamer , needy and Jesper will probably cheat on you once. But since you are the only same sex couple on the show´s universe, they will still promote you are "true love"
Jesper: Straight people settle for less
Nina: wait! I am not straight, therefore my show is mostly directed at a queer audience
Kaz: Oh Nina, sweet inocent child, first; they would never call you "bisexual" onscreen , they will make olympic mental gymnastics in order to not call you "bisexual" once. And your love interest are going to be seven men and one woman that will die right after you sleep with her-
Wylan: With a fade to black, liplock covered, very chaste compared to your sex scenes with men or mine with Jesper-
Kaz: And she will never be mentioned again unless it´s a joke about it "being a phase"
Jesper : #justiceforSusane
Wylan: what about Kuwei?
Jesper: He is just a background character that pops once a season to say a funny catch phrase
Kuwei: i need better friends
Jesper: See? he gets it
Nina: Stop! you are making my show sound terrible! We are interesting people, we probably would make interesting characters
Kaz: Thats when Inej comes, she would be a strong female character that is strong thanks to trauma, solves her problems with violence, she doesn't have a love interest because "she is too strong and independent for a man"
Inej: ahemsheisnotwhiteahem
Kaz: But she is actually complex because sometimes she cries. Only pretty crying of course. People are just laying there, waiting for an Inej spinoff to be announced. That one is very sucessful and only lasts one short, but very satisfying season.
Matthias: Oh no-
Nina: Now what?
Matthias: I just realized you end up with Kaz
Nina: EW! NO! NONONO! WHY WOULD YOU-
Kaz: i don't want it either ,Nina. But the audience will call on the erotism of me trying to kill you and destroying all of your beloved friends and family.
Jesper: You are the main character, love. You can't have a personality, that would stop the audience to see you as a self insert, so Kaz´s fangirls will demand you to comply their wish fulfilment fantasy.
Inej: Because only your love will change his genocidal issues.
Nina: STOP! why are you ruining my fantasy show?!
Kaz: We have realistic expectations on what executive producers do. Why make something good when it can be marketable?
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non-un-topo · 6 months
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Let's ban group projects at the 4th year level forever
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kangen-wanshi · 11 months
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Hii!!
Is it okay if I request Gepard x reader? Where he isn't educated in romance and stuff so he reads and watches cliche romance stuff and tries them out on us.
(Bonus if he swoops us off our feet randomly and bites a rose from it's stem to look like those cringe catcallers but HE looks like a suave mf)
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Different ft. Gepard Landau
Ever since he's got into a relationship with you, he realizes how 'bland' and 'simple' his way of approaching romance is. To capture your heart more, perhaps, a few change is in order..
Tags: sfw, no pronouns used but reader is shorter than Gepard
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Sheltered and wholey inexperienced of romance - is often the idea that swims around as gossip in Belobog in terms of the Captain of the Silvermane’s single romantic life.
This, fortunately, is not entirely true.
As a Landau, yes he was mostly driven to a path made for him since young, depriving him of normal childhood, friendship, and well, romance.
But the young man is not entirely clueless to it. In fact, he was taught about romance from when he was a teenager.
He was expected to find an admirable figure to court and brought back to the Landau family, hence he was taught to be a gentleman, and how to ‘court properly’. So even though he’s not so clueless in the romance department.. His method can feel entirely.. Stiff, and scripted.
Planned dinner dates at the best restaurant in town, daily letters sent to your mailbox, messages every morning, evening and night to check up on you when he’s away at the Frontline.
He’s sweet, really. He knows he’s doing something right (despite the eye roll and the teasing from his sister) when he sees you blush, smile or giggle at his attempt.
But whenever he sees your attempt at confronting him with your love, in comparison, he feels like his method is a bit too mellow to your bright light.
But this is the best way Gepard knows how to court and show your love properly with someone.. How can you be so creative at showing your love to him? He doesn’t know.
But he will find out!
So he went on his secret journey and mission to achieve a way to sweep you off of your feet (literally and figuratively).
He asks Serval - obviously, for a guide, considering that her lifestyle is more carefree than he is and that she’s a close friend of yours. He asks for advice from some of the Silvermane guards who're already in a romantic relationship as well as Dunn to help! And he even went out to ask the Trailblazers about how to ‘woo you properly’.
The last attempt is what sparked the idea of your current predicament.
The Trailblazers are a creative bunch, considering that they came from beyond the sky, their methods are also.. Beyond the sky. March 7th and her silver haired friend was the one who lent him a videotape containing a compilation of cheesy romance movies from across the galaxy!
So, being the Landau he is, he studied it intensely.
As intense as he could, to the point that one of his soldiers can swear that they can hear him rehearse some quote under his breath during patrol duty.
But learning alone won’t do! Gepard strives to take action! As soon as he finds himself to be well prepared, he makes his move.
Inviting you to the rooftop of one of the tallest buildings in Belobog just on the outskirt of town, heater are properly arranged, a set of blanket and pre-heated meal waiting for the two of you under the starry and beautiful night of the city.
Gepard was there first, naturally, to make sure that everything was prepared and every backup plan ready to go.
When you arrive, the show begins:
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Sitting there on a single lone chair is Gepard himself. Outside of his uniform, he wears an oddly simple white shirt (that seems to suspiciously wrap his figure well), as well as a pair of black dress pants. His legs are crossed over the other, one of his arms is leaning on the back of the chair while the other is propped on his knee.
And that wasn’t the weirdest part of it all.. Gepard is.. Biting a stem of rose..?
“Wha..” You hold your stifle, “.. Love, what are you doing?”
“Waiting for you, my rose.” He finally speaks up, his speech entirely different from his usual polite and straightforward manner, as he pulls himself up from the chair swiftly, and plucks the rose off from his lips to give to you, “For you, dear.”
Now you can’t help but giggle and give him the stupidest grin yet as you take the rose from him and took his offered hand as he lead you to where the picnic set is waiting, with your arm linked to his leaning onto his thin shirt, you finally gave in and snort, “Alright, alright, out with it Gepard, did Sampo set you up for this? Or did you lose a bet with someone?” you giggled at the rose he gave you, "This is.. A bit out of character even for you."
“Wh- No, no no, of course not,” nearly caught off guard with his own stuttering, he coughed to his hand, “I’m just.. Trying to be different today, that is all.”
“Different?” You look up to him with a raised eyebrow, “Different why? What do you mean?”
“Well, I..” He sighed, his shoulder dropped, as pink finally creeped up to his cheek. Serval was right - this plan is way too difficult for him to go through. He may be well versed in Preservation when it comes to battle, but when he’s supposed to mimic and maintain the persona of a flirt from a movie directed in an entirely different planet.. Perhaps his skill doesn’t really cover him in that area.
“I just wanted to do something different for you,” he puts his hand above yours, squeezing slightly with a small smile, “You’ve been busy yet you always shower me with your various ways of showing your love. So I just.. Want to do something for you, in return.”
He pulled your hand up and lowered his head, to plant a more firm, and more genuine kiss to your hand, “Sorry if it ends up a little.. Weird, or awkward to your liking. I was told by the Trailblazer that this was uh, a famous way on how to charm your partner, so.. I thought you might like it.”
You took your time to process his words, yet any fancy way of reciprocating it is immediately wiped away by the melting of your heart at the explanation of his attempt. So instead of saying anything, you cupped his cheek and planted a quick kiss on his lips.
“You don’t have to be different to make me happy, Gepard,” you plant another kiss on his cheek, “Whatever you do or give to me - I’ll always cherish it.”
This isn’t how it’s supposed to be. He glared at you with a conflicting gaze and reddened cheek. He was supposed to be the one who made your heart go ‘doki doki!’ as one of the illustration books he borrowed from the Trailblazer - not you making his heart flutter!
So he commits to the final act by putting his arms under you and picking you up swiftly bridal style in his arms, earning a surprise yelp and a tight clutch of your fist on his shirt. Finally, He caught you off-guard and made you flustered instead by his action.
Still dazed and surprised by his sudden boldness, Gepard sneaked a kiss on your nose, before nuzzling your neck, and carried you over to the picnic area he’s settled with a proud smile on his face.
He’ll most likely ditch whatever embarrassing attempt he did before, but this? He’s definitely going to do a couple more of this in the future.
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raisesomehale · 4 months
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then now and always
written for the winter edition of @sterekeverlasting’s fanzine with gorgeous fan art from the lovely @1jet2unknown❤️
WC: 13k Rating: Teen Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence | Ten Years Later | Years Without Seeing Each Other | POV Stiles Stilinski | Stiles Stilinski Leaves Beacon Hills | Ex FBI Agent Stiles Stilinski | Alpha Derek Hale | mountain man Derek Hale | Full Shift Werewolf Derek Hale | Derek has a ranch | and a dog |Mutual Pining |Fluff and Angst | Second Chances | Lack of Communication | Unresolved Emotional Tension | Winter | Christmas | Food is a love language | non-graphic description of animal birth | First Kiss | Getting Together |
- Excerpt -
Stiles is stuck. Stiles is stuck in the fucking snow in the middle of bum-fuck-nowhere at night with a broken down car three days before Christmas, and the nearest tow truck company—over fifty miles away—doesn’t open until morning.
He fucking knew he shouldn't have taken that scenic route through the mountain pass, but the closer he got to Beacon Hills the more he wanted to prolong his arrival… He just figured that it was going to take actually crossing into Beacon Hills for the bad luck and powers that be to strike. But as it is, he’s still two hours upstate in a nothing-town with more ranger outposts than residents.
Maybe it’s actually all of California that’s cursed, not just Beacon Hills.
Or maybe it’s just Stiles. Maybe this is the universe’s way of punishing him for always running when his life starts to crumble. The irony is too obvious for it not to be. Like come on. Him ending up stranded back in the first place he ran from? Cliche much, universe?
Sighing, Stiles slouches in his seat, head hitting back hard against the headrest.
His eyes flick over to his phone on the passenger seat. Maybe he should just suck it up and call his dad, even if it’ll ruin the surprise of his visit, but he recoils from the idea as fast as it comes to him.
He can’t have his first call to his dad in months be a cry for help.
His car horn gives a short and punchy BEEP as his forehead drops down against it. He can see his fuel gauge from this vantage point. He probably won’t have enough gas to keep the heat blowing until morning. Maybe he’ll freeze to death. At least then he won’t have to face all the ways his life has become one gigantic compilation of failures.
Then he hears a soft tap-tap-tap on his driver side window.
Stiles jumps so hard that his seatbelt locks against his chest and slams him back against his seat. His eyes fly out the window–heart in his throat nearly choking him when he sees who’s standing on the other side.
“Derek?!’
-
❤️ Read the rest on Ao3 ❤️
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broodparasitism · 6 months
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Everything I've Learned About Querying from Talking to Agents (And Traditionally Published Authors)
Disclaimer: I'm UK based, as was everyone I spoke to. I didn't include any country specific advice, just what I think is applicable regardless of where you live, put it might be useful to know this is from a UK lens.
As part of my course I was able to go to a lot of talks with literary agents (a mixture of literary, genre and nonfiction) and I picked up a lot of useful information - a lot of it not quite so bleak as I feared! - and thought it might be helpful to compile it for anyone looking to query agents in the future, so, here goes, under the readmore:
Querying
Remember that agents want to find and publish new authors. They're not at odds with/out to get aspiring authors. They want to work with us. This is someone you're working with, so don't pick an agent you won't get along with.
Manuscripts should be queried when they are as close to finished you are able to manage. There are a few agents that are open to incomplete manuscripts, yes, but many more that flat-out refuse unfinished work. Manuscripts generally go through about ~15 rounds of edits before landing an agent.
Send query letters in batches - around five or six at a time. There is no limit to how many agents you can contact, but you can't contact more than one agent from the same agency, so make sure you've selected the most suitable one from each.
In most cases you can't submit the same manuscript to the same agent twice - so having it be as finished as possible is all the more vital.
Some of them will take a long time to respond. Some never respond at all. If it's been three months of nothing, it's safe to assume that's a rejection.
One agent said she took on about two new authors a year, which likely isn't true for them all but is probably a reasonable average. For all of them, the amount of queries they get can be in the three digits a week. I can't emphasis enough just how many they get. I take a lot of authors to mean that means it's a 0.001% chance and despair, but that assumes each manuscript has an equal chance, and they don't. Correct spelling and grammar, writing in a genre that appeals to the agent, quality sample chapters and respecting the submission guidelines (more on this later) improve the odds by a significiant amount.
One agent said he rejected about half of his submissions from the first page due to spelling and grammar mistakes and cliches, for perspective.
You'll need to pitch your book. If your book cannot be pitched in three sentences, that's a sign it has too much going on and you'll need to do some pruning.
Please don't panic if you cannot come up with an accurate pitch for your book on the fly - you're not supposed to be able to do that. A pitch takes many edits and drafts just like a manuscript.
Send your first three chapters and a synopsis (this should be a page, or two pages double spaced. It should not include every single plot point though, again, if major things end up not there at all, question if they're necessary for the manuscript).
Three chapters is the standard - as in, if the agent web page doesn't specify how many, that's what to opt for. If they say anything else, for the love of God listen. If there was a single piece of advice that the agents emphasised above all else, it was to just follow each submission requirement to a T.
There needs to be a strong hook in these chapters. If your manuscript is a bit of a slow burn, that's fine, but you can cheat a bit with a 'prologue' that's actually a very hook-y scene from later on.
Read the agent's bio page throughly and make a note of what they like, who they represent, and what they're looking for, and highlight this in the query letter.
Your query letter has to say a little about you. It doesn't have to be really personal information (but say if you're under 40, because that's rare for authors and they like that), and keep it professional but not stiff, they say. If you have any writing credentials, such as awards won or creative writing degrees, include them, as with any real life experiences that pertains to the content of your book. But no one will be rejected on the basis of not having had an interesting enough life.
Apparently one of the biggest mistakes for debut authors tend to be too many filler scenes.
In terms of looking for comparative titles, think about where you want your book to 'sit'. Often literally - go into bookstores and visualise where on the displays you could see it. It's really helpful if you can identify a specific marketing niche. Though you want to choose comparisons that sell well, but going for really obvious choices looks lazy. A TV or film comparison is fine - as long as it genuinely can be compared.
Do not call yourself the next Donna Tartt. Or JK Rowling. They are sick of this.
Don't trust agents who request exclusive submission.
Or any with a fee. Agents take a percentage of your advance/royalties - you never pay them directly.
In terms of trends (crowd booing), there's been a boom in uplifting, optimistic fiction, but more recently dark fiction has been rising in popularity and looks to have its moment. Fantasy and Gothic are both huge right now. Publishers also love what's called upmarket/book club fiction - books that toe the line between genre and literary.
But publishers aren't clairvoyant and writing to trends is a futile effort, so don't let them shape what you want to write. Some writing advice I got that I loved was to not even THINK about marketability until draft three or four.
If any agent requests your full manuscript - this is crucial - email every other agent you're waiting to hear back from and let them know. This will take your manuscript from the slush pile to the top, and you are more likely to get more offers of representation.
The agent that flatters you the most isn't necessarily the best. Be sure to ask them what their plan for the book is, and what publishers they're planning to send it to - you want them to have a precise vision. It might be that their vision misses the mark on what kind of book you wanted to write, and if so, they aren't the right agent for you.
Research like hell! A good place to start is finding out who represents authors you love (the acknowledgements pages are really helpful here). if you can, getting access to The Writer's and Artist's Yearbook is very helpful, as is The Bookseller, the lattr for checking up on specific agents. (I was warned the website search engine is awful, so google "[name] the Bookseller" to see what they've sold. That said, only the huge deals get reported, so it's not indicative of everyone they take on.
I also want to add Juliet Mushen's article on what makes a good query. I owe a lot to it, and I feel like it's a useful template!
Once Agented
Agents send a manuscript to about 18-25 publishers, typically. Most books will end up having more than one publisher interested.
It can be hard to move genres after publishing a debut novel, especially for book two, not only because it means it takes longer for you to establish yourself, but the agent that may be perfect for dealing with manuscripts for book one might not have the skills for book two.
Ask the agency/publisher about their translation rights, their rights to the US market, and film and TV rights. Ask also what time of year the book is going to come out, if being published.
It's less the book agents are interested in than it is you as an author. You will be asked what you're going to write next, so have an answer. Just an answer - you don't need another manuscript ready to go. One author said she flat-out made up a book idea on the spot, and she got away with it - just have an answer. (This is also useful to put on the query letter.)
Caveat that this is, of course, not a foolproof guide to getting a book deal, nor is it in any way unconditional endorsement of how the industry works - I just thought it would be useful to know.
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trashlie · 2 months
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Love and Deepspace Thoughts
I promised some thoughts about Love and Deepspace and we're a week into the game and I think I can finally ramble about it for a while. I've been immensely enjoying myself and screaming daily with my friends lol and I think I've been able to formulate my thoughts pretty well! Idk how many people actually wanna read this, but I always love to have a record of my thoughts - especially something this early in game, because knowing papergames, there's going to be so much angst, so many twists and turns, and I'm already seeing a lot of threads of how things could play out and I like to be able to look back and see how wrong I was lol.
I play on the North American server and have completed chapter 7, so this will be full of spoilers for story content, as well as a lot of spoilers for anecdotes, tender moments, and some of the myth stuff - I'll try to denote where I'll mention certain spoilers in case you're trying avoid certain things, but it'd be impossible to write all of my sincere thoughts and capture all of what I really love and am looking forward to without spoilers, unfortunately.
Below will have a lot of thoughts on the current LIs as well as speculation about the 2 coming LIs, as well as their dynamics, and further speculation on where I think - or maybe just would like to see - the story could be going. To be clear, I have not cleared all anecdotes or myths, as I'm trying to savor things and good lord I cannot pull all those cards; a lot of this is compilation between my experiences as well as @poisonheart and further things I've read and discussed in the server. I will also be approaching this as a longtime player of MLQC, papergames' other otome game, because I cannot help but see the comparisons between the game and sing the praises of where I feel like they've grown and refined, but I don't think you'll need to have played MLQC to read this - you can honestly just ignore those bits lol >A<
What I can outright, sans spoilers, say is that I'm really enjoying Love and Deepspace so much and I think that it's come at a really good time for me, personally, as a MLQC player, because there's so much in game that's been completed and we're basically going through the motions doing our dailies, waiting for our new chapter events or participating in the occasional events (if you aren't hoarding resources for SP wish tree events) so it feels SO refreshing to dive into a new game that takes place in the same universe/world but have so much new stuff to uncover, so much new lore, new characters to meet and get to know. In MLQC I have a very clear favorite, but so far in LADS, I find that while I think I might have a favorite, I really enjoy all three LIs so much and I don't feel bad when I pull someone else's card, because it means I get to gobble all the lore! I don't feel like "UUUGGHH THIS GUY" when we get to X's chapter route. Perhaps it's just that LADS really caters to specific tropes and cliches in a way that I enjoy, but I feel so much like they've done these characters great justice! This goes for the MC, too, who doesn't feel at all like a cookie cutter MC meant to be a stand in for our own self-insert, but rather has a lot of personality of her own, is feisty and discerning.
Also, I gotta give a lot of props to the character customization features. I understand why people are upset that you can only change your hair and hair color in the photobooth function, but we rarely see MC out of that feature - so much of the game is in first person POV - and the times that we do see her, she's seen from the back, so maintaining the same hair for all characters allows them to keep something they can use for her stand in in such scenarios. But the customization is legit nuts! You can do so much with it, I spent so long tweaking mine the day before the game launched! I want to make side accounts I will never play just to play with that function lol
But let's get into the good stuff!
I really cannot sing the praises for the LIs enough, and that's going to be the bulk of what I'll talk about, because even this early in game, there's so much nuance to the LIs in both their characters as well as their dynamics with MC. Everyone brings a little something different to the table, and with what little we know of the upcoming LIs, I think even if for some reason the current LIs don't work for people, maybe the new ones might? But personally, I am so invested in all three of them! While I think I have a definite ranking in favor forming, it's not like it means I dislike any of them at all, and I'm always so eager to learn more!
One thing I'd like to mention before getting into it is that I love the inclusion of the myth cards, and though they are treated as alternate universes, I think it's more like they are previous or parallel timelines, but I'll try to get into that a little more as I talk about the characters!
From what I can see so far, I think Rafayel is one of the more popular fans with the North American/English-speaking fanbase - and it's not hard to see why! He's sassy, provides good comedy, he's fun to bully, and he's really pouty. I had a feeling he would be my favorite from the get go, just because I tend to have a thing for really pathetic men lmao and I have SUCH a fondness for him. I said I think I have a ranking forming, but it feels WRONG to rank them because that's how much I really like them, but if I had to, Rafayel's #2 position is really, REALLY close to #1! But the thing is, it's not just because of all of those traits above. I'd argue that he's one of the characters who has a lot of iceberg depth, as in there's a lot of depth to him that may get ignored or glossed over because of the sass and brattiness that accompanies, or even masks, it. As poisonheart puts it, the comedy hides the pain - and Rafayel comes with a LOT of pain! There's a delicious complexity to him where he is one part needy and clingy, but also one part resentful and hurt. MC made a promise that she doesn't recall - whether it was in this life or another - and you really get the sense that Rafayel wants to settle the score, but at the same time his feelings get in the way of those bitter, hurt feelings, and I really enjoy this complexity a lot! I think it elevates all of the sassiness, gives it a purpose and meaning.
Take his Nightly Stroll Bond: on the one hand it comes across as comedic and even manipulative -and it is! But when you get into it, you understand why. That's not to say if I think there's justification for manipulation because that's not what I'm here for; I'm just here for a good time and a good time I'm having. But when Rafayel says "It's been 800 years!" I don't think that's an exaggeration - he just isn't talking about just the day that he waited. Is faking an injury/illness and checking himself into a hospital overkill? Sure lol but that's what makes him so delightful to me. There's all of this hurt and unaddressed resentment, but as much as that, there's all of these feelings! Because even though he's hurt, he CARES about MC, SO MUCH. That's the problem! It would be easier if he didn't care, but he does. He's so needy, so clingy, he wants her attention because he's waited for so long while she was off, having forgotten him, living a life that abandoned and left him behind while he waited and waited and listen ;~; my stinky fish man I'm so sorry I cannot wait for her to learn the truth. I want to know SO BADLY what happened! When did they meet, anyway? He makes a comment on the homescreen when he's sulking lol about "See you in three months... three minutes, landlubber"
HOW LONG DID HE WAIT FOR HER IF ONE MINUTE IS ONE MONTH TO HIM?!
And listen, idk what anyone else thinks, but the end of chapter 7 had me in my FEELINGS, with the way he tried to leave her at the bottom of the ocean - but he couldn't, because of their promise, because he's unable to go back on it, because even though she forgot all about him and their promise and went about her life without a memory of him, he can't do that. It's the hurt! It's the resentment! It's the confliction between his feelings, because it seems like they take up equal space - his hunger for her attention, for what feels like she was so fickle to give and take away, the way she meant so much to him and he feels like it wasn't the same ;A;
(I've contemplated how possible it is that they met when she was younger, before she was attacked in the Wanderer incident 14 years ago, and if that could somehow have affected her memory, but I feel like it must be something greater, because seeing the fish glow in his heart means the vow they made was binding, so something strong must've caused her to forget. But that's also why I've contemplated if this was in another life? I'm less sure about this, because in Rafayel's second anecdote, he crosses paths with MC at university, though of course she doesn't recognize or recall him, and he specifically recognizes her voice. "Though her voice has matured, her pronunciation, enunciation, the rhythm of her speech, and even the emphasis in her sentences... Every word strikes like a drumbeat, awakening long-buried memories in his mind" It feels more likely that it happened while they were younger. Also I feel like this passage really encompasses her significance, that he can recall these details, to recognize them after so much time ;~; stinky fish you make my heart ache ;~;)
I appreciate so much that they've given Rafayel so much depth, that under the comedy of his pathetic, sulky exterior is so much reason for it, that there's an undercurrent of resentment and something dark - after all, we haven't actually uncovered what happened with the painting and Raymond. We saw the mermaid skeleton in his house - was Rafayel seeking revenge for his people?
But Rafayel also shows tremendous emotional sensitivity, in ways that sometimes catch me off guard. I distinctly remember lol sitting in shock after 4-3, and the text from Rafayel that pops up asking MC if she got the thing, telling her about how he asked a seagull to send a white seallshell why hasn't it arrived yet lol and I remember going "NOT NOW RAFAYEL READ THE ROOM ;~;" and then he goes on, telling her "if you draw on it and put it into the ocean the sea will carry the feelings you poured into the drawing to the soul you yearn for" and I just started SOBBING lol ;~; It was just so.... poignant but so simple. He didn't say I'm sorry for your loss or my condolences or anything like that - it was his own chaotic, weird method, but it was sincere. Likewise, he shows that similar sincerity in Ocean At Night, despite initially dismissing paper lanterns as silly human traditions - a lantern will be blown out why would you put all your hope in something so fleeting - coming around to using his own flame, that will never go out, to light a lantern for MC with the prayer that her hopes will never go out. ;~; Listen, I cried. I was TENDER my heart was soggy ;~;
And while I know people love a good pathetic man and enjoy chaotic sass and the fact that we really, truly NEVER know where his plots are going to go lmao - always an adventure with him - I hope they appreciate that depth and don't disavow the darker elements of him that give reason to those core elements of him. Rafayel is a character that carries his hurt and bitterness on his sleeve, rather than hiding it or shoving it away, and I really look forward to exploring it and all the messiness it has to offer, and how it will play out for MC.
On the very far end of the spectrum is Zayne. He's the character I expected to not be too fond of, so I was so pleasantly surprised as we got to know him to find myself proven wrong! I expected him to be... hm... I guess colder? More prickly? Than he turns out to be? And, admittedly, he is still rather aloof and cold on the surface, but I think it helps that he and MC have that history and that we are introduced very early to them through the A Frozen Promise Bond. It made it readily apparent that Zayne was not a cold and aloof person because he was too lofty or something but rather... it just seemed like maybe he'd been someone more awkward when he was younger, someone who didn't know how to connect very well with the daughter of this family friend, but he still tried. The snow seal took me out, you guys ;~; I never moved on from that!!!!!!
Despite seeming so cold, there's a certain kind of warmth to Zayne, just under the surface. He shows his care and concern in the ways he knows best, as MC's PCP, caring about her well being and health, but their Tender Moments are a collection of wonderful moments showing them growing closer, getting to know each other better as people, as friends and equals. For the record, Starry Nocturne hurt me so much, but it did two things I thought were so important. a. It showed that he was not infallible, which I think is very important, because often characters are written in their roles as geniuses who never fail, or else accomplish the impossible, and to see him lose a patient, while painful to read, made him so human but also b. It gave him that moment of vulnerability with MC where he could lean on her. It's so, SO important! for a MI to be able to lean on the MC, I feel, for them to be those equals, for him to be able to be vulnerable with her, but especially so for a character like Zayne who feels very reserved and closed off.
MC makes statements about feeling like there's distance between her and Zayne, especially when they first come back into each others' lives for the first time, so getting to indulge in these little Tender Moments of them taking little steps towards each other, closing that gap between them, is so satisfying! Having that history gives them a dynamic unlike Rafayel or Xavier's with her, because she has her memories of their childhood, of who he was when they were younger, and who they are now, and can compare the warmth of him opening up, of the chuckles and laughter she elicits from him. They also have this kind of flirtship I really enjoy - something very coy, not in an uwu so shy way just.... very coy, both dancing around the bush, before one of them calls it what it is - I thought the A Heartfelt Paradise Tender Moment a really good example of this!
It's so easy to read Zayne as being cold and aloof, but he really does have so much warmth, he just isn't good at showing it. He doesn't wear things on his sleeves like Rafayel or MC. But good LORD when he's in private....!!!!!!! The Business Trip Memoria TOOK. ME. OUT!!!!!! This is the game launch and they're already throwing this at us?! It was, to me, such a mature kind of date to give us? Two people who have had to grow used to each other's absence in their lives, and continue having to make space for those absences, as both are busy people - Zayne, a dedicated cardiac surgeon and MC a hunter - and what it means to grow used to the absence and to miss each other. But listen - when MC got in his lap?! She was touching his mouth? His face?! "What did you want me to do, in front of all those people?" he asked her? SIR?!
HELLO?! Girl. Listen.
I had to fan myself alfjkkfkjafjkafkjaf lmao
I looooooove them for that element of normalcy - for the people who have important careers and lives that they have to attend to, but still find the room for each other in their lives. The implication that Zayne rushed his way through school, took on grueling workloads and lacked a social life amongst classmates much older than him, not because he loved learning or even because he was so dedicated to his career - but because it was his way back to MC, so that he could return to stand in front of her? GOD. HOW DO YOU MOVE ON FROM THAT? HOW DO YOU HANDLE THAT? Knowing that he did it all so that he could stand in front of you again? HOWLING pls LISTEN.
Zayne may feel cold on the surface, but he is SO warm, he cares so much. And not just about MC, either. Thank God, too, because I'm not huge on the "Cold man only cares about the woman he loves" type, but Zayne cares so much about his patients, and making sure they feel seen, cared about? His first anecdote had me crying about seniors in hospitals with no relatives to accompany them to their examinations ;~; What a man.
I haven't had a chance to dig into his myth yet, which is a shame, but his third anecdote DID destroy me. I'm not even exaggerating, I was sobbing in my bedroom - and the worst part is I knew it would be painful going in and I still wasn't braced for impact enough! I mean, frankly, both his second and third hurt but nothing like the third! Parallel universe Zayne in a grim reaper role where he must kill humans turning into Wanderers - so very opposite the surgeon version of him who does everything he can to save people, both of them living parallel lives to each other, experiencing each others' lives through their dreams/nightmares. THIS HAS ME SCREAMING!!!!!
So much of MLQC has a lot to do with timelines - parallel worlds, some alternate universes, a whole timeline that's technically the same timeline reset but also still moving forward...... lol I can't help but think about where all of this fits in to LADS. Even though the Myth storylines are taken as alternate universes.... I think they're part of everyone's stories. We see echos of them. I haven't finished Rafayel's but even little moments, like making a break for it and having to run to escape attention echos a scene of Rafayel and the Princess MC making a mad dash in the market alley to escape the palace guards. It feels especially true for Xavier and MC, which I'll get to. But especially with Zayne - whose myth, again, I haven't been able to dig into, but seems to pose him as a sort of god, a forseer - we have two very different timelines/events now: his myth/Philos story and his parallel Grim Reaper self. How many timelines/parallel universes are we playing with, I wonder....?
I really want to revisit this in the future when I do get to dig into his myth, because I can see how Rafayel and Xavier's myths tie into their identities and their dynamics with MC, but I don't know yet how any of that works for Zayne and MC! I'm so intrigued, I can't wait!!!!
And finally, Xavier. God, I should have known lol in retrospect I should have realized Xavier would be my weak spot but listen..... sometimes I gotta lie to myself lol I love everything about him, the seemingly gentle eepy man who is also simultaneously a walking weapon of mass destruction but also so easily stumped by a UFO machine lol. Much like Rafayel, I'm especially fond of him because of the depth and dynamics, but also, honestly, much like Rafayel, he just checks all the boxes. Poisonheart puts it best when she says Xavier is the perfect middle-ground of the two - he's not as sassy as Rafayel is, but he'll still roast MC, he's very grounded and comes off a little aloof sometimes, but he doesn't seem nearly as aloof as Zayne, and he's also really unintentionally funny! He plays the middle-ground of them SO well. And where Zayne was working hard in order to show up in front of MC again and Rafayel has a score to settle but also so much neediness, it feels like Xavier has a LOT of karma to make up for.
Now, I personally don't have his myth cards, but poisonheart does, so everything I know I've experienced via her and all of our hours of screaming lol and the thing that really gets me the most about Xavier and MC is like..... okay it's the way he's clearly this really incredibly strong guy, but he plays the submissive prey role so well? lol He begs if she tells her to, he doesn't resist, he indulges her, he plays along - but when the mood strikes, he'll pull the dominant switch and flip the table and alkfjlFKJKAFJ ALKJFAF LAKJFAKFKJFAJ AFLKJD GODDDDDDDD IT GETS TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Xavier has that sense of like.... everything for MC, right? Like he's making up for a lifetime. There's implications that maybe he's been searching through space and time for her, trying to find her, that they've lost and each other countless times before - or rather, she's lost him - and his Shooting Stars myth supports this. Sometimes it's really subtle, sometimes it stands out so much I'm in agony. She remarks so often how he feels so distant, like he's as out of reach and mysterious as a star. She has nightmares about him disappearing and he is incredibly reassuring about staying, about not leaving. And maybe I'm reading into it, but he even talks about her hanging on tight, like maybe if she's strong enough, she can keep him from ever being taken away, keep them from being separated this time.
He's also the one who feels like he's actually endured all the years. Rather than separate timelines or parallel worlds it feels like Xavier has actually traveled through space and time, like he's the same Xavier from the myth himself, which makes him talking about the loneliness of stars so much worse. How long has he been alone, searching for her? ;~;
But their dynamic just really gets to me - it's those echos, the way MC subconsciously acts on them, and how indulgent Xavier is towards her. It's the playful teasing and the gentleness and how he plays so submissive and docile but when the mood strikes he can switch it up and catch her (and me!!!) off guard. It's the way he texts LMAO never writing out you or one lmao (which is marginally better than Rafayel's COMPLETE LACK OF PUNCTUATION LMAO ALFKAJFKJAFKJAFKJAFJK) It's the way he has that innocent baby face and could absolutely get away with murder.
Initially I had contemplated if it was possible he is actually a star and while maybe that isn't true I am still not certain he's human - at least he's not from our world (especially if he really is the very Xavier from the myth) but I still like to think of him as one, because he wears the star motif so well and likens himself to one so often. Also, look, I am a SUCKER for a star motif. I was doomed from the start lol.
There's just something about the agony and TRAGEDY in their past, in the echos, the subconscious fears, and the sheer indulgence!!!!! It's MC telling Xavier he might be her enemy later and the distress it caused him, prompting him to share his access privileges with her to earn her trust ;A; It's the way he's apparently spent DECADES, at the VERY LEAST, on our earth AND HE'S A TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE COOK lmaoooooooo it's the stupid little lines he says because he's not as overtly clingy and pouty as Rafayel but an armful of plushies is a dreadful thing because then he doesn't have a free hand to hold MC's hand !!!!!!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS?! WHINES
I could write a whole essay about Xavier and I'm restraining myself and attempting to be really, really normal about him okay?
But yeah for him it's that depth of like... the guilt and agony he carries - because not only does leaving her hurt him, but it hurts himself, too. That unbearable loneliness, the endless wait, hoping, wondering, unsure of when, or if, he'll find her again, but refusing to give up - and when he does, endeavoring to make up for it. Like, as it is, there's something about strong men being submissive that is so lakkjfkafkjfkjaf alfjakfaf but it's the way Xavier does it with MC that is soooooo INDULGENT, so VERY "for you, because it's you" that makes me want to chew my keyboard and howl at the moon and every time he reassures her he won't leave I feel dread but also I want it to be true.
I know how papergames operates. I know Xavier may mean it, but I also know.... ;A;
And to think, this is all JUST THE LAUNCH STUFF! We haven't even passed chapter 8 yet lmao We don't even have all our LIs! We've (maybe?) yet to meet our antagonist? WHICH I'M EXCITED ABOUT BTW
Listen.
I have some thoughts and I'll try to keep them short (yknow, for me) because this is already long and rambly and maybe I can just expand on this later but: Sylus and Caleb are confirmed as LIs right? But are they the same person or not??????
If Sylus = Caleb it gives us a LOT of potential for exploring some really complex, grey morality. I mean, no matter what, Sylus is going to bring grey morality lol but especially if it turns out Caleb is actually secretly the leader of Onychinus, because it brings that whole "Who is this person I thought I knew?" and more so because Onychinus is poised as an enemy to the Hunter's Association.
But something Papergames has done in MLQC and I fully expect them to do here is explore grey morality, not only in Onychinus, but the Hunter's Association. Xavier's Tender Moments Garden of Secrets brings up the implication that some Wanderers are, in fact, intelligent, and while it's rare, it can occur. And with parallel world Grim Reaper Zayne having to kill people before they turn into Wanderers it begs the question of this world: can that happen here, too? And it gets into the moral conundrums. That's not to say the Hunter's Association are bad for killing Wanderers and protecting people but it starts to bring up questions, because in Grim Reaper Zayne's world, this is being covered up. What about this world? There's also the question of what is Onychinus even doing? I fully expect to find that whatever their objective is, it will be a question of the greater good and if the ends justify the means and the such.
Ultimately, an antagonist LI has to be sympathetic in some fashion, because how else are they going to write the story for them lol. Like they can certainly have Bond/Memoria/Tender Moments that are more about the combative element of their relationship meeting the chemistry that draws them to each other, but at any rate, there has to be something that draws them to each other and makes them care, right? So therefore, he can't be entirely bad, or at least MC has to be able to empathize with him and his objective, or the cause of it or something like that.
If Caleb = Sylus, that might be more achievable because of their history, but obviously that isn't a requirement, and that can also make it more complex, because again, that whole "this person I thought I knew".
I think there's a possibility for that overlap partly because we already have a LI with a history with MC - but to be fair, Zayne's history with MC is very different than Caleb's and has a different dynamic, so even if they didn't give him the villain route, it would still play out very differently and give them a significantly different enough dynamic that I don't think it would be a big issue.
If he's not Sylus, then there's still a lot of avenues to explore with Caleb. They've already implied that Caleb wants to take care of MC, wants her to lean on him and let him play that role for him, to stop being so strong in front of him, and I think that could very well affect his story and what has lead to his "death". Being in the airforce makes me wonder if it's possible that the military is associated in any way with Onychinus - after all, didn't he say that he does top secret work involving the deepspace tunnel, and isn't Onychinus interested in that? It wouldn't be the first time a government agency was written as being corrupt lol (and again there could be a lot gray morality here where Onychinus isn't necessarily inherently bad). Caleb could have gotten involved simply by his job.
There's the revenge angle, if he, too, was an experiment subject (which would make sense because why did Granny take him in as well?) and wanting to get back at? the people who experimented on them. Or wanting to be more involved? A spy case? SO many possibilities and I'm really excited to see where it all goes!
I think regardless of how Caleb is reintroduced to the story, I imagine there's going to be some kind of conflict - his "death" and then reappearance.... did he know that was going to happen? was it planned? was he involved? I don't think they'll bring him back and yay! now she has a family member back but I think there will be some kind of strife to work through, some good ol angst that really plays with the dynamic of feeling hurt and betrayed but wanting to return to the old times that can never be returned to, wanting to seek refuge in someone who maybe doesn't exist anymore, being drawn to someone you cared so much about and feeling so conflicted about it alfkjkfjkjafjkaf kj
I JUST HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS!!!!!!!!!!
This is such a rambling mess so kudos to anyone who made it this far. Maybe I'll manage to write some more bitesized thoughts later @___@
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xiaosorbet · 8 months
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what about me? (kaveh x reader x alhaitham)
just a little blurb!!! i cant think of anything else to write so jdhfljsadakhds here's this cliche "i like them but theyre into my best friend" set in their akademiya days
warnings: not poofread nor edited just word vomit
kaveh is mad for you.
he adores you. he adores everything you do and say and even everything you don't do and say.
he loves listening to you talk. every single inflection in your sentences, every change in your tone. he particularly likes it when you talk about something you're really happy and excited about because your voice... oh, your voice just becomes so bright, it lights up his whole universe and makes him forget about all the dark crevices and corners in his life, if only for a moment. he wouldn't admit it, but he likes when you're mad too. during times when you'd rant about a certain professor you don't like very much, or a groupmate you just can't seem to get along with, he finds himself holding back a smile at the way your face crinkles up, your voice lowering into the most adorable growl.
he loves watching you work. he never turns down your invitations to study together in the library, claiming your presence anchors him and keeps him focused. in truth, it's quite the opposite; hardly any real work gets done when he's around you because while you're focusing on your textbooks, he's across the table working out how best to look at you discreetly and not look creepy. he studies you like he's compiling information for a thesis only about you. he thinks about how he really would write one about you—about the faces you make in deep concentration, about all your little mannerisms, everything he takes notice of. nevermind mastering architecture; he memorizes all of your habits and quirks, hoping to be an expert in the subject of you.
he's madly in love with you. it doesn't take a scholar to realize it. he is aware that surely, you've caught on too.
but whether you have or haven't wasn't important. he knew you didn't feel the same.
and it would be fine. in another universe, perhaps all of it would be bearable. his heartbreak would not be so palpable if you simply didn't see him that way, with no reason besides. but there is a reason, and it is the most devastating thing in his life.
alhaitham. you like alhaitham.
it seems that you love him the way he loves you. he sees the way you look at him, the way you admire everything he does and says and even everything he doesn't do or say.
and there's nothing he can do. alhaitham is his best friend, and so are you. the two most important people in his life. being around the two of you was torture. torture that he would have to face for the rest of his days, because the only thing that could crush him more would be losing you both.
but you and alhaitham have your own little universe, bright with your smile and his. alhaitham knows all of you and then some. there is a world with just them that kaveh will never know. so really, it's like he's losing you both anyway, drifting away further and further.
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essektheylyss · 4 months
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Ten Books to Know Me
@aboxthecolourofheartache reblogged her version of this from ages ago but she'd tagged whoever saw it and it sounds very fun and difficult so let's do it!
Tris's Book by Tamora Pierce - I had a habit as a kid of always picking up the second book in a series, so this was the first of Tamora Pierce's books I read. Emelan had an effect on me on a microcosmic level, I'm pretty sure. Anyway, the protag of a whole world of mine is named Tris now, in homage to Trisana Chandler, so. the particulate is still kicking around in my brain.
Ptolemy's Gate by Jonathan Stroud - Another childhood FAVE. This series as a whole started fucking with what I understood a book to be. Also the ending of it has a vice grip on me to this day, and it is probably why so much of my writing is very vibey and favors ambiguous endings.
Cyrano de Bergerac - This was the first assigned reading I had in high school that I utterly LOVED. I love this play so much, I love the tragedy, I love the quiet sorrow. This was also the first proper tragedy that I remember really loving.
The Opposite of Loneliness by Marina Keegan - This is a book of poetry and short stories by a Yale creative writing student who was killed in a car crash very soon after graduating, compiled by her professor after her death. I read it repeatedly in college; it is really quite lovely.
Underland by Robert Macfarlane - Apologies to Box who wanted reading recommendations, but she is who introduced me to this book if I remember correctly, and I have spent the two years since I read it habitually picking up Macfarlane's writing without even realizing it. Absolutely phenomenal writing.
Staying with the Trouble by Donna Haraway - @ professor Haraway I know you are a semi-retired scholar and also in the most expensive college town on earth but are you looking for research assistants cuz uh
The Mushroom at the End of the World by Anna Tsing - I actually read both Staying with the Trouble and this book on the same weekend in the start of 2021. I compromised on not including Entangled Life by Merlin Sheldrake, which I felt was very cliche of me, by including this book, which had as much of an effect. Read those three and Pantheologies by Mary-Jane Rubenstein and you will have some semblance of an idea of what the spiritual portion of my brain looks like. In the interest of not writing the same blurb four times I left the latter two off but know they make up a little microcosm of 'you could make a religion out of this' for me.
The Cat Who Saved Books by Sosuke Natskukawa - A Japanese novel about a cat who appears to a teenager after the death of his grandfather, a bookseller. I read it when I was very frustrated with trying to read contemporary fiction and it was a bright spot among that. (I am still very frustrated with the state of contemporary fiction and this book remains a light.)
Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer - Okay I read this one most recently out of this list (over the summer) but it had been on my list for a long time and it really does live up to the hype because it is just so luminous in every sense.
Annihilation by Jeff Vandermeer - I had to put this one last simply because HOLY HELL. Rewired my brain. This is the goal I aspire to, this is the dream I dream, this is the highest peak among the mountain range of writing aspirations that I climb. If I can one day write anything even akin to the Southern Reach trilogy I will be ready to die, but that is an utterly unachievable goal so God's just gonna have to let me live forever, I guess.
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li-binauje-artisse · 20 days
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So like... about ff7 remake + rebirth... I will get to the point : to people who only played these two games as introduction to the ff7 universe....don't make the mistake of thinking that the OG game is just Remake/Rebirth but less modern. Now, to try to expand on it a little... Even if you love remake/rebirth and think OG is ugly (opinions i don't share but to each their own and good thing if you have fun ), the plot itself is actually different. The characters are different too (which is like...related). There are things happening in OG ff7 that are not there in remake/rebirth. Same for the other way around obviously and i am not talking about boring sidequests to fatten the game or characters from spin offs making their return. I am talking about important plot points. Remake made it obvious it would be different, Rebirth is writing it in bold letters in case it was not clear. Sometimes it makes a 180° turn in some key plot points. The difference are not just about graphisms and gameplay, really. The tone is different, the plot is different (even if you see familiar names and even if the "steps" are similars), the vibe is different, the subtexts are different. Same for the places, you recognize them but they are not just "the OG places but bigger and in 3D" the whole ambiance is often actually different. The vibe is not the same and it's not because of the amount of polygons. I can't say i am very enthusiastic about Remake/Rebirth. Even if, i admit, i like some things (like Barret's smile idk), overall...there are too much things that bother me. But then again, i am not exactly a big fan of the spin offs so trying to glue them togheter is not endearing it to me. Even if you don't care about OG ff7 at all and like... okay you do you, but i have to insist when i say that playing FF7 Remake and Rebirth is...not a good way to really discover what made ff7, well...ff7, in my opinion. And well, obviously there is also the fact that OG ff7 is a complete game (so you understand what are the characters's deal and what is up with this world in more or less 30 hours, maybe 45 if you get lost). Between us, i never understood people saying that the compilation cleared up things that were hard to understand in the OG game. If anything, i think that the compliation only added confusion by basically rewriting things. Some side characters in the OG don't have much of a background? Well, that's what side characters are about, usually. In fact? The characters tend to be cliche of themselve in the spin offs. (for what it's worth i'd blame the awkward translation in OG but tbh the french translation is worst (it's a bad translation based on the bad english translation) and i don't change my mind when i say that it's not any less confusing that the whole compilation. Some subtilities are gone because of the localisation, but the main points are still here) But Remake/Rebirth are basically alternate universes at this point, never mind if we like it or not, there is still a LOT of value in playing the OG ff7. Some things that may even surprise you, since many people (...and the various spins offs too...) forgot about important things that were in the OG.
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suhjihanma · 6 months
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☩ 𝕻𝖊𝖈𝖚𝖑𝖎𝖆𝖗 𝕹𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖆𝖗 ☩
☩ Kink: Blood play ☩ Word Count: 1,149 words ☩ Pairing: Sukuna / Female!Reader ☩ Content Warning: Monster formation Sukuna, mentions of blood, slight mentions of possible death and dying, mind break, bodily fluids, human degradation, bruising, scaring, torturing. ☩ Author's Note: My first debut within kinktober. This is an ongoing compilation of stories written once a day. As I continue to post stories for kinktober, please note that I will ban minors who interact with my series or other stories apart from this project. Also, kink shaming is not tolerated within my fics. If the kinks that I write are not for you, please do not come with hostility in my inbox. Just simply ignore them. And, for those who are just morbidly curious about dark kinks or just love the smutty, dark content, I appreciate you guys for liking and reblogging. Reblogging helps me out tremendously as a fairly new writer for the anime fandom. Other than that, I hope you all will enjoy the daily content. I will be placing my fics on AO3 soon. I created this first story on Sunday morning.
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The faint shrills of your voice were now engulfed with the soaked cloth that was around your lips. You now believe being spared was a foreign concept. How someone could leave you in a position so vulnerable that it made you fall to your knees was baffling. Humorous at best. 
Who wouldn't say that lady luck strives for you to be pleading with tears coming down your face?
A stranger to the dark-lit room that reeked with the odor of bodily fluids, your body sat aimlessly on the floor, with teardrops and mucous secretion mixed in with several droplets of blood now running along with a stream that flows steadily to your arms. You have been taught modesty, yet showing yourself nude among a man who would not give a damn about your condition seemed hopeless. Frankly, you lusted for the attention of wanting to be studied at beyond covered clothing. The eyes of a man who gazes upon a woman like yourself, to “undress” you with his eyes or some of the cliched sorts. A man like Sukuna would definitely be the one who would give you the favor. 
Especially for a woman who is decorating among bruises, welts, alongside scars.
Reality now became intertwined with hallucinations as you desperately reached for whoever’s hand. A hand that will possibly guide you among distorted illusions, or a hand that will hinder your senses towards insanity. Both options are similar causes, yet these causes are the factors for your sudden blood loss. The eyelids that were once filled with life suddenly became too heavy to bear. Exhaustion was beginning to weigh on you as you desperately called out the name that harbored fear yet of whorish passion. The amount of blood loss that you endured now was hindering your mental state. You wondered how you were still presenting yourself to this man above you, a man that only looked at you and smiled cruelly. Sukuna continued to gaze his eyes around your body, a body that was reaching its limits and now succumbs to more than torture. 
“You look like you had enough.” Sukuna jeered, his fingers slowly hovering over the pool of blood that formed over your thighs. Before, his hands caressed the top, savoring the warm skin before all became lost. His fingertips reach for the pool and the shade becomes decorated with his tips. Shades of blood were slowly beginning to turn dark as he brought one of the coated fingers to his lips, savoring the metallic taste that coated his tongue. Tiresome as it was, reacting would gain nothing from your situation. You were helpless in Sukuna’s domain. Escaping would be more than less futile in your stance. All your tired eyes could do was watch, and the body that was slowly succumbing to shock was close to giving up. His laughter and excitement made you rage inside your living hell, yet this living hell was real proof. Then again, his giddiness excites something inside you. Playing with your essence in his fingertips was truly something a man like him can toy with. Humans are descriptive as slaves, peasants, low-lives, everything at the bottom. Sukuna reminding you of your place as you bleed your life essence for him seemed appealing. A lifeless slave that you were, you couldn’t help but to whimper at his mockery.
“Please.” You whined, thighs squirming in the cold blood that sat across your legs. Exhaustion was soon to form over as you lowered your head. Sukuna looked over your falsified bow from the exhaustion and his eyes perked up, now dilated from your heightened erotic stance. 
Please, what?” He questions you. The soft pants that came from your cloth steadily continue as he looks at you with piqued interest. As he continues to look over your greatly bruised body, he smiles to himself before licking one of the open wounds that became exposed on your shoulder blade. Your face begins to tighten as Sukuna continues to entrance his tongue on the opened entrance. Pain engulfed your body as you helplessly whined out in agony before succumbing again to exhaustion. A laughter rolled out from Sukuna as he continued to shoot every weakened nerve in your body, desperately wanting you to fall further into his hellish embrace. Beyond overcoming mental break, your body could only take so much as you fell into a deep slumber, one where a voice that lingered nothing but sultriness ringer through your ears. 
“Develop a false intimacy with you? Fuck you in this pitiful pool of blood of yours? Surely that will bond us together, but it seems like you are already there.”
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earlgreytea68 · 8 months
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The timing of "From Now On We Are Enemies" is epic, of course: stuck on a greatest hits compilation when it looks like your band is over, broken up, done, boom.
The lyrics of "From Now On We Are Enemies" are some of Pete's most brutally sardonic lyrics, like, I know they are this is a song about Amadeus but I NEVER LISTEN TO WHAT THEY SAY lol and I believe them that Pete wanted a song that felt like Amadeus (and it does, just the use of that slightly archaic word "rejoice" helps to set that scene) but it is very hard to read "A composer but never composed / singing the symphonies of the overdosed" as being about Amadeus, like the composer who sings is...Patrick. It's just Patrick. That's the composer who sings the symphonies of the overdosed. IT'S SO SPOT-ON hahaha which his lyrics almost never are so very on-the-nose that it's almost like they HAD to say it was about Amadeus. And there are so many enduring Pete themes in the lyrics, in ways that feels so unrelievedly harsh: Nobody will ever remember me (think, e.g., the end of "Flu Game"), I was just a kid and too young for all of this (think, e.g., "the kid was alright but it went to his head"), "a downward spiral, just a pirouette" (think, e.g., "I'm every cliche but I simply do it best"). (And, of course, "fall to your knees," which...that's all over Pete's lyrics lol I won't get into all that right now.)
So anyway, there's the lyrics and the timing, knowing that a song with those lyrics showed up just as he was losing his band: I only want what I can't have, over and over and over again throughout the song. But then:
The title. Just the title of this song. It's just so delicious. What a Pete Wentz move. Because on its surface, it's, like, devastating. To title a song with these lyrics and that timing feels like a gut punch, like stealing your breath away with the painful tragedy of it all. "From now on, WE are enemies." But. BUT. The line in the movie is said to God. The enemy is God. It's just so layered, that Pete was never saying his band was the enemy, the enemy was the stuff outside of their control.
And now, in the year 2023, Patrick can sing this song -- this particular song with this title and these lyrics and that timing -- and he can sing his heart out over I only want what I can't have, and you know what? None of it is true anymore. They overcame all of the forces outside of their control and here they are, on stage together, rejoicing.
Surely falling to their knees will shortly follow lol
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jariten · 2 months
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Recurring themes in 2023: Horror and Gore
My knowledge and experience with horror still remains shallow, but I had some chilling encounters with I dare say some essential reads in the manga genre that got to me. Of those are: PTSD Radio by Masaaki Nakayama Parasyte by Hitoshi Iwaaki Mimi's Tales of Terror by Hirokatsu Kihara & Ichiro Nakayama adapted by Junji Ito Cold Apartment by Akane Saiga
I was encouraged to check out Masaaki Nakayama's work many years ago and the licensing of PTSD Radio gave me a great reason to finally get started. Not only is the horror truly unnerving, deploying great sequences and a wide range of spirits, I was also blown away by the balancing of multiple timelines, locations, and overarching story thread playing out in the unfortunately unfinished series. What got me most though was in the final volume when he in detail describes and artistically depicts his affliction with a sudden and extremely rare blood disease that put him out of commission for some time. Then a series of truly eerie and unnerving hauntings that had affected himself and several acquaintances. A series not to be missed by lovers of ghost and spirits based horror. Maybe more action-packed and body horror than a typical horror I was so happy to finally have read the famous for decades work that is Parasyte. I found myself absorbed into the well planned story and the questions it asked itself. Its status among Japanese readers as a gateway work is not one I will challenge.
Junji Ito is beyond cliche at this point but Mimi's Tales of Horror reminded me that I like him a lot as someone who does adaptions or his own spin on other people's ideas so I found this with its mix of comedic and intense encounters with the supernatural to be my favorite Ito release of the year. While these reads were all great, it still felt like part of the cultural catch up I was doing as they are quite famous in their genre, but there was one fluke find I was surprised I couldn't find much info in english. Cold Apartment by Akane Saiga. Literally handed to me as I was browsing in a store, I was intrigued by the art style on the cover and didn't find myself disappointed by the contents of this one-shot compilation. A landlord must feed his giant carnivorous cat, a stalker becomes the stalked, two children stumble upon a slashers hideout, those are just the stories easy for me to quickly summarize. With some gorey panels that made me wince, depictions of intense emotions that rocked me, and an artistic expression reminiscent on the type of original horror content you could mistakenly stumble upon on the 2000's internet. This read will be impossible for me to forget any time soon
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altocat · 3 months
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In an uncharacteristic move I’d love your thoughts on Genesis for the character asks!!! XD 🖤🖤🖤
Yess hhhhh I will happily expand on him some more!!!
Sexuality Headcanon: Okay definitely pansexual. There's so much Genergy to go around!
Gender Headcanon: Cis Male
A ship I have with said character: I cannot stress enough how profoundly warped from Sephgen my mind is lmao Constant Sephgen brainrot (AGS is great too!)
A BROTP I have with said character: LITERAL BROTP because Genesis is definitely Aerith's half brother and they're going to burn something together.
A NOTP I have with said character: N/A they only WISH they were WORTHY of him!
A random headcanon: I like the idea of Genesis one day in the far, far future just showing up to bother Cloud and the group and no one really knows why he's here or where he even came from but he just sorta invites himself in and refuses to go away. He's extremely passive aggressive and also somehow keeps getting stuck babysitting the kids. Cloud keeps pointedly asking if he's Sephiroth's ex and Genesis refuses to answer. And he steals all their food and uses up their hot water. Literally no one invited him but Genesis does what he wants.
General Opinion over said character: Real talk I think Genesis' story is actually profoundly sad and I get really unhappy when people refuse to acknowledge that he was dying and making desperate decisions in accordance to the fact that he was dying. He really lost everything in the end. And yeah, his story is super messy writing wise, but I see what they were going for with him. One of the things I like about him is that for all his Gackt-ness and Nomura cliches, he does have a very strong personality. There's really not a character in the Compilation quite like him. He's deeply, deeply misunderstood and sure he's theatrical and kind of edgy but there is some nuance to why he acts the way he does. He deserves a deeper look from fans, or at least a second chance.
Also I love him. And he deserves it.
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papermatisse · 6 months
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Whispers in the Dark || K.SW
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† genre: horror
† word count: 6.2k
† warnings: possession, graphic exorcism scene, violence, idk
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† synopsis: it started out small with whispers and body aches and things moving around. now he's a different person entirely—or perhaps not even a person.
† (a/n): it's a little very corny lol it's like every possession movie I've watched compiled into one fic of cliches. but yeah fun times 👍
† taglist: @scuzmunkie @hipsdofangirl @hydroyaksha
anthology | main masterlist
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It started out small with barely anything seemingly off or askew. Though then again, the two lovers were up in the clouds and blinded with joy over their new house, so maybe it was just them ignoring the blatantly obvious. But after a few days of settling in, things started to become weird.
There was always this feeling of being watched. Even as Sunwoo would leave for work in the mornings, (y/n) would still feel the eerie presence of someone lingering nearby, eyes trained on her at all times. Particular spots of the house felt most uncomfortable, and so she'd make it a point to avoid them at all costs. Sunwoo never commented on it either way, and so she chose to keep the anomaly to herself. Preserve the ever so fragile peace which remained in this place.
But then it began to manifest itself. She'd catch glimpses of someone—or something—in the corner of her eye, but when she'd turn, it'd be gone. It was always the same image as well. Of a dark, shadowed silhouette of a person. Brooding in the recesses of her house and her mind. The one who continuously watched her every move. Perhaps she was tired and seeing things, or perhaps she had grown more suspicious of the once happy abode the longer she stayed in it.
But those glimpses soon grew more obvious. More intense.
Looking up to see not only her reflection, but something else behind her. Waking up in the night to see a spot of the room darker than the rest. Walking up the driveway and seeing it staring out the window at her.
At this point, she had to voice her concerns to her boyfriend. It was beginning to eat away at her psyche, her body on constant alert and growing weaker with the incessant paranoia. Knowing that they weren't the only ones in their new home.
But Sunwoo was dismissive at best. Not only did he not believe her, but he also questioned her sanity, asked if she was truly okay or not. The way he pressed the back of his hand against her forehead as if ascertaining whether she truly was healthy or not was the breaking point for her, slapping away his hand with an unexpected yet not surprising harshness.
The next few days were rough, walking on eggshells around the other to prevent another fallout in what was supposed to be a happy time of their relationship. The occurrences continued to grow both in frequency and intensity, and (y/n) was merely forced to take it with a grain of salt. Sunwoo was unbothered by it all, his only turmoil seemingly being the strained relations he held with his significant other.
(y/n) took every opportunity she could to stay out of the house. If a friend needed help moving something, an invite to a company dinner was sent to her, a sale at her favorite store—she'd certainly be present there than at the inescapable and suffocating fortress of that house. Anything she could use to delay her inevitable return was taken advantage of.
Sure, it was petty. Sure, she should've pressed more in the communication department. Sure, she was perhaps adding fuel to the flames. But she couldn't find it in her to be any sort of accommodating. Not in that place. Not when this overwhelming and crushing weight seemed to fall upon her whenever she passed the threshold. The debilitating sense of dread seeping into her very being with every moment spent within those four walls. That constant, pervasive feeling of eyes lingering upon her no matter which way she turns.
Yes, she could've talked to Sunwoo more, but it was entirely incomprehensible to her how the man didn't seem to feel anything similar to her. In the sparing hours they spend together after work, he seems none the wiser. Nonchalant as he ambles about the place, this disconcerting rhythm in his mannerisms as if he's well acquainted, comfortable even, with the place already. Like he doesn't feel the heaviness that just hung in the air at all times or the sensation of being watched every moment you're conscious. He just seemed to be existing.
(y/n) could see their relationship growing more and more strained. Morning chitter chatter seemed to dwindle into mere formalities, saying what must be said before departing for work. Movie nights and shared dinners waned into her coming home as late as possible, and Sunwoo well asleep in their bed. They texted when they could, updating one another on their whereabouts and such, though that was about it.
Already, in a mere few weeks, the house had torn apart the seemingly sturdy foundation they once had established as a couple. Though her relationship began to be the last of her concerns.
Sunwoo grew more reclusive. On the days she'd find herself showing up home at an appropriate hour, she'd find him sitting in the living room. Alone, in pitch black, with no TV on whatsoever. It startled her every time, but upon seeing her, he'd stand and greet her as he usually does, though now in a more… empty, rehearsed way. They hadn't really been talking much, so it seemed reasonable for him to be awkward at this point.
They'd eat together, though Sunwoo began to eat less and less, the leftovers he'd leave on his plate growing by the day. In the mornings, he'd take a sip of his coffee before leaving for the day, abandoning his thermos upon the kitchen table. It concerned her, and when he was asleep one night, she found herself raising his shirt, seeing how his body was beginning to wither away. His skin grew pale, his torso defined with lack of fat, his face becoming gaunt. She felt her heart clench upon itself at the sight of her beloved Sunwoo suffering so, and in the back of her mind, she found herself blaming the household.
As much as she loathed it, as much as her body writhed upon itself at the mere prospect of it, (y/n) began spending more time at home. Feeding Sunwoo as much as she could, doting upon him with every fiber of her being, rambling on about whatever seemed to pass her thoughts. The warmth of his smile felt like a remedy to her tortured soul, a reminder of the good that lay within this cursed house. The way his laugh filled the empty space brought a sense of life that was once devoid in their living space. Sunwoo alone had the ability to make this house feel like home, and she remembered why she loved him so much.
After a few days of this new schedule, she was suddenly awoken in the middle of the night by an abrupt jostle in bed. Blearily, she squinted through the fluorescent lights pooling into the dark bedroom. Her mind was fogged by the haze of sleep, though she began to come to—began to process her surroundings. The source of the light deriving from the bathroom, the lack of Sunwoo beside her, and the terrible retching sound now filling the atmosphere.
(y/n) had rushed over as soon as she processed the situation, crouched beside Sunwoo with her hand along his back as he emptied the contents of his stomach. His body trembled beneath her touch, a sheen of sweat caking his skin. And as if to make matters worse, between the upheavals of his body, he managed to make out one word.
"Hospital."
A few traffic laws were broken in her haste to get to the hospital, but eventually she made it, dragging Sunwoo as much as she was able to into the emergency center. Though not even an hour later, they were being sent off.
"His vitals are fine. Perhaps a bit malnourished at the moment from his nausea, but he seems to be fine." The doctor explained, flipping through a stack of papers with a dismissive shrug. "Could be just a bad case of food poisoning, son. Just make sure to take it easy for the next few days. Try to avoid greasy and spicy foods. Drink lots of fluids. Make sure he's eating, though."
The drive home was silent. In regards to Sunwoo's case, (y/n) couldn't tell what he was thinking. He just sat there, staring ahead with this blank expression. In her stance, she was beyond worried for Sunwoo. She didn't understand what was going on. She didn't understand what was happening to her boyfriend at all.
The sight of the house made her stomach churn, grimacing as she reluctantly pulled into the driveway. It was silent between them, though only for a moment before Sunwoo was turning to open the door.
"S-Sunwoo!" (y/n) called out, arm shooting forth to grasp at the sleeve of his shirt. He froze, back facing her as his hand remained on the handle of his door. "Sunwoo, why don't we go someplace else? We can go to a hotel, call out to work in the morning, spend the day relaxing together. How does that sound?"
It was another bout of pure silence, Sunwoo as stiff as a board as (y/n) desperately clung to him. Eventually, he finally turned to face her, and she felt hope at first. Hope that he would listen to her. Hope that she'd be able to get to him for once. Hope that he'd be able to put an end to whatever was happening.
Then she got a look at his eyes.
Soulless, apathetic vats of darkness, glaring at her with such unbridled disdain that she found herself recoiling from him, hand retracting almost instantaneously as he cornered her with those heinous eyes of his. And for a moment, she didn't recognize what was in front of her. She didn't see Sunwoo at all. It was like an entirely different person in front of her.
But then he seemed to snap to, blinking away that momentarily evil farce for a neutral, tired look. Like a poor kicked puppy, Sunwoo came back to her, brows furrowed as he shook his head.
"Sorry, baby, I'm tired. I just want to go to bed for now. Maybe some other time." And then he slipped out of the vehicle. When the door closed behind him, she released the breath of air she'd been holding, pressing a palm to her racing heartbeat as her eyes trailed after Sunwoo sluggishly dragging himself back into their house.
What was that just now? What just happened? Sunwoo had never looked like that before. Sunwoo had never felt like that. It was strange, ominous even. As if some form of an anomaly that wasn't meant to be. As if something beyond her preconceived notion of reality. As if an invitation to begin questioning her world more than she already had been. Yet at a moment's notice, he had reverted right back, as if the turmoil he'd implemented into her mindset was for nothing.
Warily, she watched Sunwoo drag himself into the house, taking this moment to herself to recuperate from the whirlwind of a scene that had just transpired seconds before. He pushed open the door, stepping into the house in his weakened state, body slumping upon itself tiredly. And through the bleary image of her tear ridden eyes, she could see the vague, obscured shadow of a hand sliding upon Sunwoo's shoulder as he sunk into the inky blackness of the house's interior.
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That night seemed to be the mere precipice of the hell which would ensue shortly after their return. Sunwoo had gone back to how he had been before. Only eating a quarter of his plate before pushing it aside. He all but rejected every offer of food she presented him, even scowling at her when she tried hand feeding him. He grew thinner by the day, skin practically graying before her, like the rich saturation of his once tanned skin was all but dissipating into thin air. His eyes were sunken with defined bags weighing down beneath them. His lips were down turned most of the time—perhaps all the time. And the few moments of sleep he did manage to receive were disrupted by late night attacks.
Nightmares that left his body shaking, drenched in a cold sweat as he heaved for air. (y/n) would be there to comfort him, stroking back his hair and bringing him back to reality, only for him to pass out once again with no recollection of the night before. At times, she'd catch him staring off places. Sat up in the bed and staring at the corner of the room, leant against the couch and staring at a blank TV screen, standing in the bathroom and staring at his own reflection. She'd snap him out and he'd be off doing whatever he does, again with no acknowledgement of his prior behavior.
At this point, and with no other reasonable explanation for such behavior, (y/n) had taken it upon herself to begin searching for new apartments. They'd be tight on money, but it didn't matter. She'd give every earthly possession of hers to ensure Sunwoo was safe and secure. This house did not provide that certainty.
She spent her free day scrolling through housing selections online, marking whatever caught her eye before proceeding on to the next. Curled into the couch and bundled in a blanket, headphones in and playing one of her playlists. Completely oblivious to the world around her, including that of the presence of the boy now standing behind her.
"(y/n)."
The voice that suddenly spoke made her heart plummet to her stomach. A deep, resounding voice that penetrated through the music playing in her ear. A voice she never once heard a day in her life, now reverberating in her skull like an incessant drum with its residual echo haunting her.
Springing to her feet, she whirled around, breathless as if every ounce of air had been expelled from her lungs from the sheer terror of it all. Though upon turning to the source, a conflicted sigh of both relief and confusion seemed to subtly quell her alight nerves.
"Sunwoo," she huffed out, pressing a shaky hand onto her rapidly beating heart. Nervously, she laughed, trying to make sense of whatever just happened—sort reality from imagination. "You scared the shit out of me."
"What are you doing?" He asked, completely ignoring the state she found herself in. His eyes were zeroed in on the phone in her hands, its screen still displaying local listings for apartments.
"Nothing…"
His eyes lazily rolled up to meet hers, glaring at her through the dark circles that enshrouded his gaze. There was an irritated scowl across his face as his head crooked to the side.
"We both know you're lying." Slowly, he began to round the couch, and as he drew closer, (y/n) took tentative steps back, clutching the device to her chest as she remained focused on the man nearing. An intimidating tension settled in the air, the adrenaline from before kicking back up as she trembled under his stare. Like a scene of a predator approaching its prey, she found herself utterly cornered as he continued to loom closer until he finally stood right in front of her, caging her against the wall with his presence. "Your God doesn't like liars, now does he?"
Her tongue had gone numb, mouth dropped open as if wanting to speak, but her voice had left her. A chill ran down her spine as she stared into the eyes of the man before her. Someone she didn't even recognize anymore at this point.
In less than a second, she felt her phone snatched from her hands, yet before she could give any sort of reaction to the matter, Sunwoo threw the phone across the room. Helplessly, she watched as the device crashed into the wall with an agonizing crack as both the wall and the device seemed to crumble in unison onto the floor.
"Sunwoo…" Her voice was weak, coming out as a strangled whisper, looking desperately between what just occurred and to her boyfriend who merely stood there staring at the spot with an unreadable expression. Before anything else could be said, Sunwoo tore his gaze from the scene.
"I'm sorry." That was all he mumbled before he ran off to their bedroom, head downcast and steps brisk, leaving (y/n) there in a stupor reflecting on what just happened
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"Thank you for coming," (y/n) greeted the elderly woman as she hobbled into the home peacefully, a light grin and a curious eye taking in the place.
"Of course, dear. I don't get many house calls these days," She laughed casually. Her eye caught the hole in the wall, glaringly obvious amongst the otherwise spotless white of the rest of the room. "So I've read your recap in the email you sent. Would you like to add anything else?"
"I'm not sure." (y/n) nervously fiddled with her fingers, nails scraping down her cuticle beds as she recounted the past few weeks. "Things have just been different since we bought the place. I thought I'd just be scared of the house itself, but now…" She bit her lip, refusing to meet the perceptive gaze of the old woman, as if bearing her soul before a stranger. Except this stranger seemed rather receptive to it.
"That's why I'm here to help in any way I can."
The reassurance was enough for (y/n), looking up to the lady with astonished relief and a settled heart. She trailed behind her as the woman waved about burning incense, muttered things in a foreign language, and looked around the house for any anomalies.
At some point, she unveiled a series of objects for (y/n) from her bag of items. Bundles of twigs and ferns tied with a piece of twine. The only indication of it being anything unique was the attached sigil on the string. These were placed above doorways and beneath objects.
"Keep these candles alight." She handed (y/n) a batch of long white candles. Her frail hands wrapped around (y/n)'s arm as soon as the transfer was complete. "It'll ward off any negative spirits that may be lingering. It'll keep you safe."
"Thank you… I appreciate your help."
"Of course. Call me if things go wrong. Keep me posted."
With that, the woman was gone, and (y/n) was once more alone in the house. She spent this limited time setting up the candles, placing them around the living room where Sunwoo would be sat eventually. Her nerves ate away at her, hoping with all her might that this would be the end of this harrowing chapter of their lives. That the candles really would displace anything that's attached itself to their house or themselves. That the normalcy of their mundane lives would return as if nothing ever happened.
The sound of Sunwoo's car pulling up startled (y/n) into action, standing from where she was seated and expectantly staring at the doorway. With every sound outside, (y/n) grew more and more anxious. She recognized the sound of his car turning off, the sound of his door closing behind him, and that of his footsteps growing nearer and nearer. She felt her breath caught at her throat as he unlocked the door, and her head seemed to spin momentarily as he finally entered.
The first thing he took in was the candles, and then his gaze drifted down the hall to their bedroom, and finally he rested his attention onto (y/n). Her stomach twisted at the apathetic stare her way. The way his lids sunk with weariness, as if fed up by it all. Memories of their last altercation briefly flitted across her mind, and she found herself rooted where she stood, as if by standing completely still, he would ignore her entirely.
It seemed to work, as he dropped his stuff on the floor and stormed off into the house, leaving her standing there in a fearful awe, wondering what he'd do next. As if trapped in an enclosure with a wild animal, expecting the unexpected at all times. When he reemerged moments later, there was something clenched in his hands. (y/n) hadn't the time to analyze before Sunwoo ducked under the couch and snatched up another one. Another charm placed by the woman.
The branches snapped in his grip, shards of wood trickling behind him as he went about and removed each and every one of them, as if knowing exactly where to look. Upon seizing the final one placed above the kitchen's entryway, he turned around and left the house, door kept wide open so (y/n) could watch in horror as he threw it all away in the bin outside, completely and entirely unaffected by them.
Once more, she was rooted to her spot, but rather than as a defensive mechanism, it was out of pure terror. Sunwoo's eyes were trained on her as he made his journey back into the house, figure growing more and more imposing as he drew nearer. The door slammed behind him in a violent manner, causing (y/n) to flinch at its ferocity.
When he finally stood in front of her, reminiscent of just a few days prior, his eyes momentarily glanced at the series of candles illuminating the living room.
"I suggest you clean up, (y/n)," He spoke, venom laced in his words as he turned back to face her. "I don't like strangers coming into our house. So remember that next time."
With that, he left once more. She trembled in the wake of his absence, breaths shaky as she attempted to gather herself together and get into action removing the candles, lest he return with a vengeance. She had briefly headed over to their bedroom in hopes of reaching out to him, though stopped short upon stumbling on the state of their doorknob, now indented by the placement of his fingers.
It was perhaps the most startling revelation of this entire ordeal thus far. The one that wrapped up the evidence collected and gave her the conclusion she did not want to accept. Because how else could a man as frail and weak as Sunwoo looks now be able to put such pressure on a doorknob like this?
That day, she slept on the couch, facing the hallway and making sure Sunwoo never stepped out when she least expected it.
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The next morning, (y/n) prepared breakfast. Sunwoo sat at the table behind her and she felt the presence of his stare upon her back, monitoring every minute movement she made. Her new phone lay beside the stove where she frequented it with nervous glances, praying for time to move so Sunwoo would go to work. Though upon her umpteenth glance, she suddenly began to receive a call.
An Unknown Number. On any other occasion, she'd have most likely ignored it. Though with the stifling atmosphere and the discomfort of Sunwoo's insistent surveillance, she found herself almost immediately answering the call.
"Hello?" She spoke, voice as leveled and steady as she could muster. Anything to draw suspicion away from the maddeningly paranoid man seated only a few feet away.
"Hello! This is (y/n), correct?"
(y/n)'s eyes bugged out of her skull from the sheer shock of hearing the woman's voice again, heart rate accelerating as she dared a momentary glance to Sunwoo. He was occupied reading something on his phone, not even noticing (y/n)'s subtlety. Turning back forward, she continued with cooking, clearing her throat again.
"Yes." It was all she could think to say. Anything else could potentially tip off Sunwoo—something she wanted to avoid at all costs.
"Is he in the room?"
Another pause on her part before she answered the same way.
"Yes."
"I take it… the measures didn't work? He's still… the same?"
"Yes."
She heard the woman sigh, muttering something and shifting in the other line.
"Stay put. We'll have to go to our second initiative. I'll come retrieve you later at the same time as yesterday. Is that okay?"
(y/n) took a moment to process the information. Retrieve her? Meaning she'd be… taken away from here. Away from this house of terrors. Away from the anxiety that's plagued her soul for so long now. Away from all the darkness that lurks within every corner and carries with in nothing but bad omens.
Away from Sunwoo.
"(y/n)?"
"I'm sorry?" Another pause as she dragged herself back to reality. "I mean… Yes."
"For now, lay low. I'll come with help."
"Okay."
The line went dead, two muted beeps being the last thing she hears before she placed the phone on the counter once more. She didn't know what this entailed. She didn't know what the second plan was. She didn't even know there would be a second plan. And the prospect of there being help needed in this endeavor only served to further propel (y/n) into an internally frenzied state.
Absentmindedly, she scooped her breakfast onto a plate, mind still wandering aimlessly as she turned away from the stove.
A gasp fell past her lips as she came face to face with Sunwoo, his close proximity startling her enough to drop the plate once held in her hands. It shattered as it collided with the floor, ceramic shards skidding across the linoleum and littering the kitchen like a field of landmines. Yet Sunwoo seemed unaffected, far too invested in boring holes directly into (y/n)'s soul.
His eyes were wide, almost in a maddeningly intrigued state, unblinking like a statue. At such a slim distance away from each other, perhaps the closest they've been to one another in weeks, she could see the decay in his character. He seemed entirely drained, as if just an empty vessel at this point. Eyes glazed over with a sort of dull sheen, haggard and tired looking, skin that seemed devoid of any color, having lost the vitality he was once brimming with.
"Sunwoo…" (y/n) mumbled, shuffling back against the stovetop as carefully as she could muster. Her feet bumped against the shards beneath her, their scraping sounds against the floor offering the only sounds within the whole house. Yet Sunwoo again remained unperturbed, still staring at her with every ounce of energy left within his depleted body.
"Who was that, (y/n)?" His voice came out gravelly, almost strangled sounding even, as if forced out after its lack of use, yet still uncharacteristically steady with a low timbre.
She tried answering him, though her mouth ran dry, lips opening and closing helplessly as stuttered clips of her voice seemed to penetrate the hazy state she found herself in. As she floundered before him, cowering beneath his imposing stature which loomed over her with little to no regard for her pitiful state, his facade finally seemed to crack with the most minuscule of eye twitches.
"Who was that on the fucking phone, (y/n)?" He spat out the inquiry through gritted teeth, veins protruding from his neck as he drew impossibly closer to her, practically swallowing her whole as she backed as far into the stove as possible, the harsh metal digging into her lower back to get as far from Sunwoo as possible.
"It was just a coworker!"
"Liar!"
His voice boomed with pure unbridled rage, forcing (y/n) into the appliance behind her with a violent jostle. Her body ached at the impact site, and she could faintly feel the sting of a shard slicing beneath her foot, though she could barely even process the pain at these junctures, what with the voice that had suddenly bellowed forth from Sunwoo's body.
It was something she recognized. Something she had momentarily heard just yesterday, and something she couldn't really understand at the time. Something beyond her comprehension and reasoning. Yet now, it seemed as if her thoughts were as clear as could be.
It emanated from him with this eerie sonority. A disconcerting fusion of tones that seemed to coalesce and diverge in a discordant symphony. It held an otherworldly, menacing quality, as if several voices, each with its own timbre and cadence, were vying for dominance within the same vocal cords of the decrepit man they were housed in. The result was this haunting cacophony of layered articulates, a chilling chorus of spectral echoes that sent shivers down her spine.
A low, animalistic growl began reverberating deep within his chest, its encompassing resonance filling the atmosphere between them. She gazed at him frightfully, wary of meeting his eyes, skin prickling with nerves as she remained trapped before him. A debilitating discomfort seemed to broil within her. Something primal. Instinctual, as if her mind were seemingly overriding every other function of her body for the sole purpose of escaping as soon as possible.
Adrenaline now coursing through her veins, she shoved Sunwoo back with all of her might. It didn't impact him as much as she thought it would have, though it was enough of a surprise for her to take advantage of his momentarily stunned state and run.
The short distance from the kitchen to the main door felt almost endless as she heard his growl suddenly grow louder and infinitely more furious than it had initially sounded.
Yanking the door open felt liberating, and the sense of freedom which came from shedding the all consuming pressures of that accursed house and embracing the open, fresh air was near cathartic. She tumbled into the front lawn, breathless as her heart thumped incessantly in her chest. The blades of grass tickled at her exposed skin, the dew of the morning still lingering on their sharp ends and soaking her clothes, though the cool moisture and the soothing morning chill helped in diluting the rush that had taken over her body.
Still laying across the grass, (y/n) whipped her head behind her, shakily taking in the house once more, with objectively more opened eyes.
It stood as a malevolent force of nature against the unassuming and quaint suburban scene it lay within. It seemed like any other structure throughout this block, blending into the neighborly charm that had first captivated the couple, yet now she could see more closely the stark, ever foreboding shadow that seemed to radiate from within. There was this palpable aura of malignance that exuded from its very foundation, suffusing the atmosphere with this chilling dominance that seemed to both lure unsuspecting victims yet ward off those who knew of its intentions—and (y/n) seemed to have just crossed this threshold of knowledge.
She didn't know for how long she lay there, trembling from the aftermath of the morning, desperately attempting to regain whatever composure she could. Her eyes had remained locked upon the open doorway, waiting for the moment Sunwoo would come and drag her back into that depraved, ungodly house. Yet he never did. Instead, what drew her back to reality was the sound of a car pulling into her driveway.
"(y/n)!" The woman came rushing over to her with a haste (y/n) thought she'd never embody. The elderly lady helped (y/n) to her feet, practically dragging her up against her will before tugging on her arm. "Come, let's get you out of here."
For a moment, (y/n) followed with a hazy mind, merely following along without any sort of comprehension of what was happening. Though she finally snapped out of it when she saw two men walking by her, adorned in black robes and crosses.
"Wait," (y/n) mumbled, beginning to resist the woman as she turned just in time to see the men enter the house. "Wait, who are they? What's going on?"
"You shouldn't be here for this." Again, the woman attempted to pull (y/n) away, but when she heard a familiar scream inside, (y/n) had suddenly become alert as ever.
"Sunwoo. What are they doing to Sunwoo? I need to get him."
"(y/n)!" The woman grabbed her shoulders, squeezing them beneath her bony touch, eyes widened and frenzied. "That is not Sunwoo in there. You know as well as I do that Sunwoo is not here right now."
(y/n) felt herself sink into this deep, muddled tunnel vision. The voice of the woman seemed to muffle until finally growing mute. (y/n)'s eyes remained on her, but all she could hear was Sunwoo's screams from within. Anguished, desperate cries. Guttural as he screamed with all of his might, nearly drowning out the Latin incantations that were being hollered at him. She could feel her limp body being pulled away again, her bloodied and bare feet brushing against the cool dew of the grass once more, the yells growing further and further away, until one cry reached her ears.
Her name.
She slipped out of the woman's hold, whirling around as she booked it for the house. Her mind screamed at her to turn back, to leave this horrific scene, as if her great morning getaway was for naught. Though she was too compelled by the weakness in her heart that couldn't bear to be without Sunwoo, especially at a moment like this.
Barreling into the house, she froze at the nightmare taking place. Sunwoo bound by ropes onto a chair, thrashing about with every fiber of strength in his feeble body, head whipping to and fro as the two priests spoke affirmatively before him, bearing crosses aimed his way as they read from a small leather bound book. Visible veins now spread across his face like cracks of lightning in the sky. Blood pooled the whites of his eyes, his irises near indecipherable from the darkness now encompassing them. The sight broke her heart.
She felt the woman's touch rest upon her back, no longer attempting to pull her away as she had beforehand. She now merely served as an anchor for (y/n), as the girl bore witness to her beloved Sunwoo in this anguished, horrid state.
The room seemed to quake with the guttural symphony of Sunwoo's screams only growing louder in intensity, his skeletal form writhing against the restraints that bound him. The air grew thick with this suffocating tension, walls trembling as they attempted to contain the battle of light and darkness within. The priests pressed on, voices unwavering as their incantations poured forth like a tide against the dam of evil that obstructed them.
And then, in an instant, the abhorrent cacophony of screams that had once consumed the room ceased. Sunwoo's body fell limp, sagging against the chair in an unconscious state, his once wild eyes now vacant, staring into the abyss of the unknown until finally sliding shut.
Without any hesitation, (y/n) rushed to his side, skirting past the company that stood motionless in waiting. Her hands trembled as she gently lifted his head into her arms, cradling him against her chest as tears pooled in her eyes.
"S-Sunwoo?" Her voice quivered as she whispered his name, eyes darting across his face for any sign of life. Only silence greeted her as the first tears began to pour down her face.
For a moment, it was pure and utter silence. Her quiet sobs broke the tension as the priests and the woman slowly reconvened, watching the scene before them with tormented hearts, allowing (y/n) her time to grieve. Though that hadn't lasted as long as they had intended.
With a suddenness that sent a shockwave through the room, his eyes had snapped open. (y/n) paused in her crying, analyzing the face that looked up at her. His eyes were no longer that of a tormented soul they had been just moments prior. Instead, they now gleamed with this… eerie serenity. A calm that seemed to stretch infinitely.
A macabre smile curled upon his cracked lips, blood seeping from the corners as they slowly dripped forth from his mouth, staining his skin a ghastly crimson. And in a cracked, hollowed manner, he spoke.
"He's gone."
The words dripped with finality. A statement for the people who stared at him with irrevocable fear. As if an undeniable truth which could not be refuted. As if he spoke not of an unfortunate departure, but instead that of an inevitability forced upon the lot.
His lips spread even further, watching (y/n) with intent fascination as she drew away from him, trembling with tears streaking her face. He laughed, this raucous, jarring sound that immediately prompted the priests to continue their incantations. Though (y/n) knew their efforts were fruitless.
She had collapsed onto the floor, breaths growing shorter and more frequent, chest convulsing upon itself as she crumbled in upon herself. She could feel his stare still upon her, hear his crazed laughs flood her mind, taunting her with his demented victory. And all she could do was lay there, vision growing blurry and hearing growing fuzzy, world spinning and reality deteriorating before her. Left only to confront the daunting truth forced upon her.
Her beloved Sunwoo. The man who she bought her first house with. The man who filled her days with joy and laughter. The man who rekindled the spark of love within her that she thought had gone dormant. The man who showered her with his endless waves of love. The man who she had promised her life to.
He was truly, undeniably gone.
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wrenreid · 1 year
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Off Limits
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content warnings: none(?)
Part Thirteen
Off limits. He said specifically that she was off limits. Sure, he was talking to Morgan, but it applied to everyone in the room - hell, probably everyone on the continent.
And I kissed her.
Because I’m an idiot.
A doe-eyed-seduced idiot.
Hotch might literally kill me if he finds out. Like she said, she was raised my a man who carries two guns.
He could play it off as a case incident, convince the whole team that it’s the truth.
I’m being paranoid. If there’s one thing Jade is not going to do, it’s tell her dad about what happened.
And she was right. It was just kissing. Of course, it was wrong, but it was just kissing. It’s not like we were sleeping together or even touching like that. It was perfectly PG 13. Not a reason for me to be murdered, and not a reason for me to feel guilty.
But I do. I feel like I’ve just done something awful. I lie in bed, my stomach aching. It’s been an hour since I left Hotch’s apartment. 60 minutes since my lips were on his daughter’s.
My mind races with thoughts that attempt to justify actions. I compile a brief list.
One: alcohol was in my system. Alcohol causes us to do things that we usually wouldn’t, especially kissing.
Now, sure, I only had one drink, and it was hours before the incident, but I’m still adding it to the list.
Two: the door step affect. We were right in front of the door of her apartment. It’s a classic, a cliche move.
Three: we were around people kissing at the party. Seeing them was a psychological trigger that caused me to kiss her. It’s science.
My justification list is short, but I think it’s somewhat valid. These three reasons make me feel slightly less guilty about kissing her.
I also feel guilty for the way I left. It wasn’t the nicest thing to kiss someone then leave because it was wrong. It was hypocritical on my part. But I wasn’t wrong about it being wrong.
I just hope she’s not mad. She was upset, I could tell.
———
I’m an idiot. I totally misread the entire situation we’ve had going on, didn’t I?
He doesn’t like me like that. I’m just his boss’s daughter. Like I always have been. He kissed me because… well, I don’t know. Maybe it was the door step affect. Which is totally a real thing. We were at my door, and it was awkwardly silent, and I moved closer so he kissed me… because that’s the thing you do. It’s a total cliche.
Sleep doesn’t come too easily for me, especially since I can still taste him on my lips. He tasted like a mixture of mint and beer, and it actually isn’t a bad combination.
It’s not until at least three hours after he left that I get to sleep.
“When are you headed back?” Dad asks me in the kitchen while he cooks Jack and me breakfast.
I take a small breath. “I’ve actually decided I’m not going back to New York.”
I think Aaron Hotchner nearly had a heart attack at his still youthful, healthy age. “You’re dropping out of college? What about law school? What about you’re future. Jade Brooke Hotchner, you better be joking right now, or so help me-”
“Jesus, Dad, chill out,” I toss my hands up in defense, a slight laugh stifling from me. “I’m not dropping out of school. I’m going online for the rest of the semester. I’ve already talked to the dean and my professors. They understand the toll a death takes on a family.”
“And law school?” He questions, his voice much softer than a moment ago.
“Georgetown has a great law school, and it happens to be only 30 minutes away from home,” I say, a small smile on my face.
My dad ponders all of this information. He sighs, then looks to me with saddened brown eyes. “If this is because of me, I promise I’m okay with you being gone. It’s for your future, Jade. I can take care of everything else.”
“Well, yeah, it’s a little about you. I know it’s easier on you when I’m here. But I also miss you. And I miss the little shit over there,” I motion toward Jack who is coloring aggressively. “And New York’s great, but I like D.C.”
The smile that grows on my father’s face nearly makes me cry. He wraps his arm around me, kissing my head. “God, Jade, you don’t know how happy this makes me. I’ve missed you so much.”
I wipe away a little tear, because he definitely just made me cry. “Ew don’t get all emotional,” I tease, sniffling.
He rolls his eyes and our morning plays out as normal, but I can sense the relief and joy radiating through him.
There’s a knock on the door around noon. Dad and Jack are out on a quest to find lunch to pick up for us, so it’s just me in my pug pajama pants and a cup of coffee.
“Spencer?” I look at him questioningly after opening the door.
“Can we talk?” He asks, playing with his hands.
“About?”
“Jade,” he gives me that sideways-head-tilt look that says ‘You know exactly what I’m talking about.’
I let him in, and we sit on the couch.
“I’m sorry,” Spencer admits.
“For kissing me or for leaving abruptly and hypocritically?”
He sighs. “All of the above.”
I dart my eyes in his direction. “State your case.”
“It shouldn’t have happened, and it was wrong, but it was not considerate of me to leave the way I did,” he explains.
I think on his statement and nod. Acceptable. I suppose. “You’re forgiven.”
A small smile creeps up onto his pink lips. The pink lips that were on mine no less than twelve hours ago. Fuck. No not this again.
“Friends again? I mean that’s what we were, right?” Spencer laughs nervously.
“Right, friends,” I nod. “We’re friends.”
“Good,” he smiles, bumping my shoulder with his.
“Good,” I repeat, letting a small smile overtake my lips too.
“I can’t believe I convinced you to go to a party,” I laugh, looking up at him.
“You must be some wizard or something.”
I roll my eyes. “Or maybe I’m just a really good pre-law student.”
His smile grows, and there’s a tugging in my chest.
“Hey, sweetheart,” my dad comes into my room around 2am. I’m falling asleep, but not quite there yet.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, mumbling.
“Yeah. JJ just called me about a case. We have to leave now, it’s urgent,” he tells me.
I rub my eyes. “Oh. Okay.”
“Text me if you or Jack need anything. I love you.”
“I love you too, Dad,” I say.
He and his pre-packed bag leave the apartment quietly. I sigh softly and lay back down.
Before I can fall asleep, I text my dad a “Be safe.” message. And then I text Spencer the same one.
I hardly look at my phone, especially on cases, but I’m glad I do. Jade’s name is written on my screen along with me words, “Be safe.”
Those two simple words, those six letters, draw a smile on my lips. I don’t know why, but her thinking to send me that makes me happy. But we’re friends, so of course she’d want me to be safe. And by the looks of it, she sent her dad the same message.
Yet, the simple text message makes this way-too/early jet ride bearable. My head leans against the window as Hotch goes over the case. We all give our input and pre-mature theories as we wait for landing.
its my 18th bday🥳🥳
happy criminal minds evolution day!!!
fourteen
tags: @pauline5525mgg @theintimatewriter @lilibet261 @greysviolets @jazzymariexoxoc @one-sweet-gubler @thatsonezesty13 @necromaniackat @awhoreforspencerreid @sebs-oxygen @scarredelirium @bts-sugaplum @awesomeness1679 @preciousbabypeter @yazzyu @cynbx @r3idsp3ncer @1010lizz @tiredbut-here @skulzombiw @lena-1895 @eevee0722 @shakespear-picaso-lovechild @daydreamingqueen1 <3
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just-an-enby-lemon · 1 year
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I think one thing a lot of Riddler writers forget is that riddles aren't a math problem (like Unburied Eddie helpfully pointed out) they are poetry with logic. That's to say that while tec savvy math guy Edward is at this point almost an essencial characther trait it should co-exist with literature nerd, will act like an english major, hoho phonetics grammar and semantics, totaly studied rethoric, has a bunch of poetry books lying around Edward.
His special interest is riddles. He loves world-play. This man has poetry compilations from all over the world. He knows a bunch of languages not because "cliche super genius speak a bunch of languages" but because it's a subject he is genuinally obcessed with and has fun learning. If he went to college he has at least a minor on english. He writes poetry on his diary like the loser he is and while some are soo cringe it brings cringe culture back to life some are actually pretty good because again he creates his own riddles and that is basically poetry with logic. And I know this is all tecnically headcannon material but it makes too much sense in my head so for me it's just cannon.
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