#it's partially because i just got news that we're getting a nasty blizzard thingy and we're gonna get like 2 feet of snow or something | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jankwritten · 1 year

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tw: vent post

tonight is one of those nights where every single thing feels negative and i don't know why. like everything feels like it's wrong and bad. i feel like i'm failing somehow when i'm literally not even doing anything. i love christmas so much but holy fucking shit does it destroy me mentally every fucking year.

#vent post #i don't know guys #i'm having such a fucking bad time tonight #m just gonna curl up in bed and watch hockey stuff i guess #it's partially because i just got news that we're getting a nasty blizzard thingy and we're gonna get like 2 feet of snow or something #by christmas #which basically means i won't be able to see mymom or brother on christmas #even though they live like 15 minutes away #feel like i'm failing at everything even though i know nobody really expects much from me #failed at making gifts for people on time #failing at looking for/thinking about getting a job #failing at getting myself in to see a doctor/therapist #failing at being able to see my fucking family for the holidays #mmmmm #m gonna be okay #i just fucking hate this part #doesn't help that i feel like i'm also failing at writing this chapter of hockey au #hockey au in general feels like i'm failing rn #man fuck. this was supposed to be my first xmas in 3 years where i wasn't working i wasn't in school i was just supposed to be stress free #able to see my family #and now my parents are fucking divorced there's a blizzard coming and all i have to show for it is a stack of shitty presents for my dad #fuck man #maybe the kraken will win the game i'm watching and i'll get a little spark of joy from that haha

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