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meolcwifes · 5 years

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I played Alone Among the Stars and had a nice time!

//BEGIN RECORDING: 20:24 SSC 15/03/35

//THIS IS THE LOG OF SOJOURNER KESTREL VISH.

+ Made planetfall as the suns set; after making camp, I set out under the light of the close-orbiting moon to investigate bands of phosphorescence visible 1.5 miles off, over hard terrain (dry, rocky bluff interspersed with 'hoodoos' eroded by wind). After ascending nearby escarpment, it becomes clear that phosphorescence is a property of certain strata of the rock formations themselves.

+ have followed river from its headwaters in the bluffland, and established base of ops. in high-sided canyon. Where higher elevations dry, lifeless, this area thrives; thick stands of fleshy plant life, fern-trees upward of 20' in height. Veins of sap seem to carry residual phosphorescent properties found in minerals deposits, river silt.

+ Caught my eye as I stopped for meal. further downriver I have found the remnants of some kind of construction: a low dome-shaped structure topped by a platform, reachable by stairway. All built of dry red-veined stone (abundant around river). Platform dominated by stone ring, roughly human-height in its aperture; study reveals its opening to align with the rise of the moon.

+ On leaving my leafy canyon, I find myself in dry hills again. Rounding a bend, I am faced suddenly with another ruined structure: carefully designed to blend into the land around it, a ciruclar area paved in stone bricks, surrounded by what appear to have been towers. The complex strongly reminiscent of small spaceport.

+ The weather has grown hot, and I have retreated to another river-canyon. This is forested with 'trees' like huge, swaying, coiling rosemary bushes. After much difficulty I manage to climb the ropey branches to harvest the fruit I see growing in the upper canopy. Thick and oblong, edible, something like a fibrous cucumber in texture. Sweet, somewhat peppery flavour.

+ Planet listing entered into Ekumenical Database as planet 'Sapsorrow' - name pending ratification. __________

+ Planetfall; fierce windstorm makes landing difficult. I make contact with small outpost of genemod settlers. Their aircraft shepherd me through storm, and the community gives me hospitality.

+ My first venture out of my hosts' territory cut short; their homestead is located on a volcanic 'island' in the middle of a hot sulphur lake.

+ After breakfast and tending to repairs on the ship, I catch my first sight of native life on the planet: an airborne plantform, something like a vast sail of kelp suspended in a 'rigging' of roots and held aloft by this world's forceful air currents.

+ Planet registered in Database under inhabitants' name: planet 'Ciuciush' - indigenous identification, ratification unnecessary. _________

+ Touched down on a black outcrop of rock near the equator - planet distant from sun, largely icebound - made camp on ridge overlooking the rough blue field of a glacier. From out my viewport as I made tea, I spotted the blackened wreck of what looks like an old transmition aerial, projecting from the ice. No signs of construction around me otherwise.

+ Surveying the glacier; I didn't see them at first - my snow goggles limiting the range of my vision - but I heard the whirr of their motorsledge. A research team from the Polis-Worlds. They crewed the station whose aerial I saw yesterday, before a fire consumed it and much of their assembled data; they make for another station on the far side of the mountains.

+ I am travelling with the researchers now; I haven't room in the ship to carry them, but the sledge moves faster now we've moved what supplies we can onboard. Progress impeded today by an unexpected ice barrier - the glacier's surface is variously pitted and upthrusting into weird daggers many storeys high. Tove - a geologist - and I climb one to get a better view. We'll have to go around the rough ice - at least a half day of travel.

+ As we progress along the spine of ice, we find that some of the pits contain liquid water - unusual! We refill our stocks.

+ Scouting ahead, Tove and I find the bare framework of another transmitter. 'The original survey team put down around here', she says. 'I thought they were further from us, though'. Ekumenical contact was apparently first made 20 SSY ago; Tove and her team are part of the ratification effort.

+ The descent from the glacier is exhausting. We are forced to disassemble the sledge; I ferry goods down in Penelope's Loom, but much of the journey is still a hard, dangerous climb. We are successful. Two days later: we have reached the research base. I manage a goodbye to Tove and my comrades of the past several days before they are consumed by a series of debriefings.

+ Planetary designation: Mahler. Ratification ongoing. __________

+ The skies here are thick with swarms of insects, hovering like flocks of starlings. They coat every surface with a tarry substance, which has found its way onto the Loom's exterior almost immediately. I have spent the morning attempting vainly to clear the viewports of the stuff.

+ Scanners reveal something on the lakebed; with great difficulty I fight through the thick skin of swarm-secretion which floats on the surface. It clogs my breathing apparatus, clings to my limbs. Not until get below it can I clean myself off, relying on oxygen backup. I am rewarded with the sight of a majestic stone sculpture: an enormous, beautiful face, its features human but made uncertain by erosion. Patches of mosaic scintillate under my searchlight.

+ The waters of this world hide such beauty. In a caldera lake, the surface clear of the omnipresent bugs of the lowlands, I find another statue. Tiled in long red oblongs, a huge human figure; the position of their arms evokes something ritual, prayerlike. The people of the world were or are truly wonderful artists.

+ Took water samples from a channel cutting through the highland rock. As I take a break from rowing, I spot through the water a trio of tiled figures, deep at the bottom and surrounded by a garden of tissuelike vegetation. I will miss this place.

+ Listing entered into Ekumenical Database: planet 'Monumence' - name pending ratification. ___________

+ Planetfall at mountain peak - atmosphere at lower elevations dangerously thick. A low stone wall rings the area, hemming in the mountaintop like an ancient fortress.

+ Pausing during the preparation of my landing and camp site, I see dark outlets carved into the cliffs above me. Perhaps the mountain *is* a fortress?

+ At night, the snow turned green under the hazy light of the moon as it filters through the atmosphere, the Loom is rocked by something outside. A small herd of animals: quadrupedal, avian, long-legged. At least 10' at the shoulder. The nuzzle the warm ground around the ship, perhaps for food.

+ I inspect something which I took initially to be a flying creature, but which has hung in the same place the last three days. It is an aerial structure; no sign of habitation - merely a lonely metal shell, a bunker in the sky. Its engine and means of staying in the air are opaque to me.

+ Though my record of this world is incomprehensive, I feel deeply uncomfortable here and have decided to leave. There is a presence that I do not like, and feel to have intruded upon.

+ Planet logged in Ekumenical Database: designation 'Broch' - name pending ratification. This article lacks physical data. __________

#it's neat to see how different my log is from ghoul's #i also got a better sense of Vish's voice as i went along #i recommend this game!#i couldn't come up with an original term i liked so 'ekumen' is borrowed from ursula leguin

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concussed-to-pieces · 7 years

Text

The Kindness; Epilogue

Fandom: Fallout (3)

Pairing: Female Lone Wanderer/Charon

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN: Thank you for enjoying!

Charon yawned, stretching with a low groan. Beside him, Spoon snuggled into his ribs. Spoon?! Charon started, half out of the bed before he recalled what had happened between them. A slow grin crept across his face. Holy shit, smoothskin. He relaxed back against her, noticing a tiny notebook clutched in her left hand. That's...

Charon remembered the little book from when they had been mauled by super mutants. Before they were sneak-attacked by raiders. In the brief interlude when they had fought and then awkwardly flirted. She'd been reading it when he had left to go 'keep watch'. His grin faded. Something like that can't ever happen again. I won't let it. Charon carefully, carefully managed to tug the notebook free of Spoon's fingers. A little stump of lead tumbled out when he opened it, and Charon caught it absently with his other hand.

'This book property of Eleanor Grace!' screamed the inside of the cover, the Vault-Tec insignia emblazoned over the neat, small handwriting. Charon closed the book a little harder than he intended, quickly putting it on the windowsill with the pencil as Spoon stirred.

Eleanor . Her name is Eleanor. Charon's head spun. Eleanor Grace.

“Y' can look at it if you want. Nothin' in there's secret.” Spoon slurred through a yawn. “Just my journey log.”

Charon fought back an embarrassed wince at being caught so easily, shrugging in what he hoped was a nonchalant manner. “It fell open. I wasn't actually looking at it.”

“Mmhm.” Spoon hummed, her drowsy look no-nonsense as she took the notebook and pressed it into Charon's hands. “Study up. Test tomorrow.”

“Smoothskin...” She was either pretending to sleep or had already passed back out. Charon huffed in exasperation, propping himself up against the metal piping that served as a headboard and gingerly opening the notebook again.

'This book property of Eleanor Grace! Vault 101.'

The first page had a picture glued to it. A man and a woman wearing white lab coats, smiling for the camera. He had to fight the urge to see them as something awful, used and over-used to distrusting scientists.

'Always know that your mother and I love you very, very much, little one. Remember her verse, Rev. 21:6. You are our precious beautiful daughter. Happy birthday, Eleanor.'

The ghoul's throat tightened and he cleared it angrily. She wanted me to read this, dammit. Charon leafed through the pages. The first of them were covered with clippings from different books and magazines...maybe even some scientific papers, scaring up a few uneasy echos of the Institute. An Overseer. Stasis pods. The safety and comfort of a Vault-Tec vault.

There was a defined part where it became obvious that Spoon-- Eleanor had left the Vault. Heated, young-adult rants about tunnel snakes were traded for blood spattered across one of the pages, now old and brick red-brown against the beaten paper. On the other side was tiny, immaculate writing. Charon's heart clenched as he read the words of an obviously shaken young woman, a terrified girl baptized in the fire that was the Capital Wasteland.

'Dad is gone. The air out here is poison. The light burns. But if I stay down there, they'll kill me. Butch's mom almost got eaten alive by the huge...bugs. They bit me and I don't feel good. My stomach hurts. My arm hurts. Butch gave me his jacket and promised me I'd see him again if I'd stop being such a pussy. I punched him for that. My legs are okay. I can walk. I should walk. Far far far away.

Dad why did you leave me here?'

Charon flipped ahead a little ways, his stomach twisting when he caught sight of scrawled, capital letters. Silent screaming trailed across the page, a girl's plea to her father who had abandoned her. 'THIS IS WHAT YOU LEFT ME TO YOU DAD I'M BLEEDING I SHOULD BE GRATEFUL THAT HE DIDN'T KILL ME BUT I WANT TO DIE I FEEL FILTHY WHAT DO I DO DAD WHAT DO I--'

Charon shook his head, fighting the nausea that surged in the back of his throat as he hurriedly turned past those pages. What the hell kind of parent is this guy? Leaving his kid alone in a world like this...Christ. Next to him, Spoon groaned in her sleep. Charon pulled the blanket up over her, smoothing it across her shoulders.

'I disarmed the bomb! I did it! I spent half the day chewing Mentats and reading all of Moira's old Duck and Cover issues. That, plus what I remembered from James's jabbering about nukes. Guess the old bastard had something to offer me after all. It's weird. For the first time since I was. Well. I felt surprisingly alive with my arms elbow deep in that bomb, clipping wires and listening to Simms hold his breath. Alive but at peace. Out here there seems to be this screaming insanity people mistake for living, the rushrushrush of survival. But today up to my armpits in nuke I realized that not much of it matters. I cut one wrong wire and I'm very very dead. Maybe it was the Mentats but I was alright with it. I just knew that I couldn't fail, that's all.'

'I got drunk for the first time last night. Vodka burns but apparently it gives me the strength of an angry Brahmin. Jericho was nursing a busted nose come morning, and Gob high-fived me when Moriarty wasn't looking. Poor Nova was tired out from the festivities though, and I 'rented' her for the day so she could get some sleep. It's getting a little more difficult to keep up this male ruse, especially with my hair being how it is, so technically getting Nova's room was a strategic move. I'm still flattered that Nova seems to think I'm a goddamn gentleman either way. But even if I was a guy I don't think I'd do that to Gob. Poor bastard.'

'The wasteland is so much bigger than I am. The vault was tiny compared to this world I have now. Moira says I'm suffering from depression, but she doesn't understand. I know what depression is. Depression is being trapped in a sunless hellhole, with no one around who actually cares about you. Depression is being used, being left battered and broken in a ditch somewhere. Moira has some jobs for me to 'get me out of the house' and I'll do my best to complete them. She's worried about me. I hate that. She shouldn't worry. I'm fine.'

Charon's brow furrowed and he looked down. Spoon was soundly sleeping against his side. He stroked her hair absently as he continued to read.

'People wonder why I'm Spoon. Not anything special, honestly. I'm not Eleanor anymore, so I picked a different name. One that lets me fit in a little better out here. And yeah, Spoon doesn't have the same impact as 'Murder' when you introduce yourself, but spoons are useful. I'd rather be useful than scary. Also it's unassuming. Who expects a person named Spoon to murder them in their sleep?'

'James if you're still out there, I'll find you. I want answers, you fuck. Why did you leave me in the vault? I'm so lost. Like you always said, I'm too cocky and sloppy for my own good. Is that why you left me behind? Because I'm messy? Or because I was just in the way of your favorite kid, your goddamn Project Purity? I'm punching you in the face when I find you, you selfish prick.'

Charon cocked his head. Project Purity?

'Set out from Megaton today to go to...

I met the Brotherhood of Steel! And I killed a...

Underworld is so strange! Ghouls everywhere. Winthrop asked me...'

Water had obviously gotten onto the pages at some point, a few of them dried together or smeared. He couldn't hold back his chuckle when he came across the entries involving him.

'I'm finding myself a companion, little book. I've decided that it's lonely as hell out here and extra protection from something terrible happening again wouldn't be so bad. One I've got my sights set on for sure. His name is Charon, like the ferryman of the Styx. He's a big, big ghoul, and he's bored to tears. I don't know why he sticks around The Ninth Circle really. I would ask him but he appears to be under some strict fucking orders. I wonder what Ahzrukhal did to him to have a huge guy like that so pliant. I hope he isn't abusing him. I thought ghouls didn't abuse one another? Out of some kind of mutual understanding that they already have it bad enough? Maybe I've got it all wrong.'

'Sometimes I catch him looking at me. Out of the corner of my eye. Maybe he thinks I'm trouble. Maybe I irritate him by not being so scared of him. Shit, maybe he just flat-out doesn't like me. It's probably my funny hat. Or how I talk. I wonder if he would try to kill me if I was able to hire him. He's obviously not a giant fan of 'smoothskins'. No one down here really seems to be but I guess I'm tolerable enough.'

'Wow was I nervous talking business with Ahzrukhal! That ghoul is a goddamn snakey motherfucker. He wants so many caps for that precious contract. I'm going to have to go clear to Rivet to get that amount for the crap that I scavenge. And that's on top of keeping all the scrap metal so I can trade it to Winthrop. This bleeding heart stuff is exhausting sometimes. Still no new leads on James. Fuck it. I hope this is all worth it. I told Charon I'd be back soon. I saw his arms flex, so I know he's at least interested!'

'The way Ahzrukhal stressed the word “employee” has me colored nineteen shades of curious. Maybe suspicious would be a better word. I feel like there's a lot more going on there than he's letting on. Did he get Charon from slavers? Raiders? Watching Charon hoist Patches like he weighed nothing was a little terrifying. I think I surprised him though. He turned around to head back to The Ninth Circle and his eyes got all kinds of spooked when he saw me there. Touching him definitely used up most of my very limited courage store. He radiates heat like a furnace. It was odd. Are all ghouls that hot? Have to ask Gob. That must be awful.'

'He's six-ten if he's an inch. The hair he has left is a rusty red color. I think his eyes were blue at one point. Hard to tell with the ghoul film over them. I wish there was more research done on ghouls! I'm so curious about why it happens only to certain people...it's strange. The only weapon I've seen him with is an old combat shotgun. Drum mag-fed, back holster. I've never actually seen him use it though. Normally he just hefts ghouls up bodily to toss them out.'

Charon rubbed the back of his neck, feeling a little overwhelmed. His smoothskin didn't miss a trick. “Observant little fuck, aren't you.” He grunted. “I did think you were up to no good. You'd nurse your fucking vodka and just watch everyone in the place. And the weird way people would talk to you and ask for help like you guys were old friends confused me.” The ghoul stroked her hair again, carefully separating out the seven braids. “I think I understand a little better now.”

'Talon Mercs. How on earth did I attract them? Took a damned hunk out of my hip too. Good thing I'm not queasy about blood, otherwise I'd be screwed. I've patched myself up as best as I can with what I've got, but it might be a little trickier than I thought getting back to Underworld. Especially with all the stuff in my pack I couldn't pawn off on Flak or Shrapnel. Butch laughed at me for saving up to buy Charon's contract, saying that I was such a pussy. Why didn't I just shoot Ahzrukhal? Even after I explained to him that I was at least slightly trusted in Underworld and I didn't want to ruin it with murder, he didn't understand. I wasn't really all that surprised. He said I was pretty after that though. That surprised me. He didn't try to do anything about it though, except wink at me and add, “For a little nosebleed like yourself”. Also surprising. The Bitch Butch I grew up with would have jumped at a chance to coerce a decent looking girl to grease his genitals. Maybe since he got out of the vault, he's had more options and it's evened him out? ...oh no, what if he's grown up?'

'Willow is a goddamn lifesaver! I'd been out of ammo for a little while and my knifework wasn't cutting it (forgive the pun). I was sure I was a goner and then that red-lipped beauty popped the last Talon square in the head. I gave her a pack of cigs for that, and I promised her another before I left. She just rumpled my hair and told me I was the worst tourist she'd ever seen. I went straight to the Chop Shop. In fact, that's where I am right now. Doc Barrows told me Ethyl and Meat can't see through the glass of their prison, but I'm pretty sure they can. I don't mind them though, they seem okay. Glowing ones out in the Wasteland I'd pump full of lead for sure, and I guess a lot of other ghouls would do the same.'

Charon suppressed a shudder. Glowing ones gave him the creeps, and he was pretty sure Barrows keeping them around was a bad move for everyone in Underworld. The pull that they had over the ferals was a little too much like mind control for Charon to be comfortable around them. The few times he had seen them they did look oddly docile, even bored. Not exactly the blood-thirsty, pack-leading 'Pulsers' he was used to.

'Barrows says I lost a lot of blood and my hip is missing a chunk of bone about the size of a golf ball. A Stim would've reset the bone if it was still there. Ah well. I told him not to worry about it, it just 'added character'. He swore at me for that, but he laughed afterward so I think I did good. I've got to get over to The Ninth Circle soon though. I want to make sure Charon knows I'm back before I go trade the rest of my bits and pieces. I want Ahzrukhal to shake in his greasy boots with the knowledge that I'm coming to take his giant buddy away. Hell, this is probably the most proactive thing I've ever done! I'm grinning from ear to ear like some stupid little kid. I wonder if once I get his contract, I can give it to him or something? I'll have to ask Charon about that, once he can talk to me freely. One thing's for sure, I don't want to stick him in a corner like a damn chair or lamp.'

'What an asskicker! Charon is the man with the goddamn plan not a doubt in my mind about that. It's awful that I can't give him his contract and set him free, but...I'm okay with having him around for a while I think. I've been keeping up this 'man' facade for some time now, just because it makes me feel safer. I never thought...after what happened, I figured I'd never want to be a girl again. But being around Charon makes me want to be okay, if just for a little while. He makes me feel safe. Hopefully writing these things down will help me work them out of my system.'

'Charon says it's not a problem that I'm a girl. “I don't recall your gender ever coming up in conversation”. Just like that. He's not angry. He fucking carried me home. He helped patch me up. ...I don't know what to do with myself. It's almost a relief that someone knows. At the same time I'm sorry for making his job tougher. Now he has to...to worry about something happening like I have to worry.'

Charon grumbled low in his throat, watching Spoon's chest rise and fall as she slept beside him. Smoothskin...

He rubbed a hand across his face, feeling a little less exhausted after his long nap. Charon shimmied up to slump against the headboard, his movements sending dust motes spiraling up into the shafts of sunlight that seared their way through the partially-boarded windows. He turned his attention back to the chronicle, patchworked fingers turning the pages slowly.

Sometimes there were sketches. Her rifle, the view from what he assumed was the door of Vault 101. A few of him, the muscle groups in his face and shoulders clearly labeled. Charon snorted when he came across a rather gratuitous sketch of himself with his pants unbuttoned, his fingers resting on his belt and the muscles of his legs clearly visible and labeled through his pants. Sometimes he stumbled over words, having to sound them out in his head. Sometimes Spoon's writing was illegible, too small or smeared to read. She had a habit of cramming words together if she was coming towards the end of a page, her loops and lines squashing themselves in a vain effort to make more room. Have to keep an eye out for extra paper. Don't want her running low.

'I could have lost him today with those super mutants. I panicked. He could have died. He could have died and I can't fix that. I can't fix that. What the hell am I going to do? I'm already way more attached than I should be but he's been through more than enough! What is wrong with me?! Why the heck did I get so worked up? Jesus. I can't afford to be this way! 'This thing did a number on me' he says like he got love-tapped instead of thrown across the room. Stupid me I'm so stupid! We're okay now but God do I feel like an idiot.'

'Caring for someone else is weird. It's been ages. I mean yeah Wadsworth Gob and Nova. Moira. Carol. Even Winthrop. Just since James I figured I never would again. Thought it would be easy. Then I met Gob in the bar and I knew I was screwed. He's the first ghoul I ever saw and he was just...he was so sad all the time and it made me so angry. He didn't do anything wrong and yet here's this other guy spitting on his existence! Making him his free labor! I don't understand how people can get away with that. Simms frustrates the hell out of me sometimes because he ignores it. I know he's just trying to keep the peace but really?'

'Charon says he's been passed around and that he's broken. I can understand at least one of those things and I'm going to do everything I can to help. I'm tired of pretending we're just partners. We're friends damn it. From the day I followed him tossing out Patches I knew I needed to help. Even while I was getting turned into Swiss cheese by the Talons I understood that failure wasn't an option. I don't have much to live for out here honestly. The allure of finding my dad and punching him in the groin for abandoning me kind of wore off years ago. But if I can keep helping...keep doing what I think is right even after everything else...I don't know. Maybe I'll make a difference. Three Dog talks about me and it's like he's talking about a different person. I can't do great things. I can barely clean my rifle right. I can do good things though. I think.'

Charon closed the notebook, trying to collect his thoughts. He took a deep breath to clear his head and felt Spoon's fingers close around his limp hand slowly, like a reflex while she was asleep. “You're wrong, Spoon.” He rasped, his throat rougher than usual. The smoothskin hummed, obviously not awake. Charon felt his chin quiver a little. “Fuck's sake, you don't even see how much you do, you...you fuckin'...you disarmed a nuke for these people. You're so damn good and you can't even see it, spitting in the damn face of the Talons and raiders and slavers.” He slid down until he was laying beside her again, taking her face in his hands and shakily kissing her forehead. “Christ, smoothskin. Jesus fucking Christ. I told you I'd follow, 'I will make my services worth your kindness'. But I fucking can't. I failed. You've done so much more for me than I could ever...so much awful shit has happened to me and then your contrary ass comes walking in acting like I still deserve to have good in my life.” Charon shook his head in disbelief.

“Don' cry.” Spoon murmured, putting a finger over his mouth. Charon hadn't even noticed the tears making their way down his face. “S'okay. No bad dreams. I'm here. Gotcha'.”

“Spoon...”

“M' here.” She repeated, wrapping herself around him protectively. “Right here. M' gonna' be here when y' wake up. Then we gotta' kill s'more baddies.”

“Of course.” Charon tried to smile, wiping at his cheeks haphazardly. “For good or ill, remember?”

“How 'bout 'for quiet an' let Spoon sleep', s'at sound okay?” The smoothskin mumbled, scrunching up her nose when Charon kissed it. “M'poss'ble bigass ghouly-ghoul, stoppit.”

“I've been called much worse than that, smoothskin.”

You are my heart. I will be with you always, for good or ill, and I promise I will be worth your kindness. Thank you.

#fallout three #fallout 3 #Charon the ghoul #Female!Lone Wanderer #rewrite #hurt/comfort #canon-typical violence #video games #slow burn #charon/F!LW #Charon/Female Lone Wanderer

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