#it’s only a bit less cursed than the tiki one | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whitetigerdemoness · 4 years

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I went full deus ex here to do some things and I have only slight shame. This is NOT the final chapter.

Foxes will often fight by standing on their hindlegs and placing their forelegs on their opponent’s chest. They try to push each other over in a trial of strength. The loser is often chased and may be badly bitten or savaged if they fail to escape.

Master Post of All Chapters

Marinette wasn’t quite sure what happened after Volpina had snatched Marc away from them. Everything felt numb and distant, almost like Reverser had altered her again but without the clarity.

“Is she going to be ok?” She heard distantly. The voice sounded worried. Worried about her. Someone was worried about her, why were they worried about her?

“She is in shock. It is not surprising, considering recent events.” A man, older. Who? Did it matter? Nothing she did mattered. Every time she thought they had finally won, fate cruelly laughed at her and kicked her in the face.

“Dude, you of ALL people don’t get to say shit about this.” Boy. Younger. Angry. She could relate. She was...she was angry.

“Nino...please. Not now.” Why not now? Now was the perfect time to be angry, to be frustrated.

“Why do things keep falling apart?” She asked, angry tears pooling in her eyes.

“Marinette? Are you back with us? Are you ok?” Tiki.

Marinette rubbed the tears from her eyes and struggled to focus. The red kwami was hovering close, looking very concerned. There was a warm pressure on both sides. Sitting to her left was Luka, gently rubbing the back of one hand. To her right was Adrien, stroking her hair. They both looked very tired. Dry tear tracks dirtied Adrien’s face. Sometime between Volpina’s latest dirty trick and now they had moved indoors. Inside (Marinette noted the decor) the Agreste mansion? Standing around them were the miraculous holders who had been at the battle, including a remorseful looking Gabriel Agreste and...Marinette rubbed at her eyes again.

“Are you...Emilie Agreste?” She gasped, wondering if she was still in shock and hallucinating. The woman she had only seen in photos gave her a strained smile.

“Yes, though I’m not entirely up to date on events. It seems I have been...asleep.” Marinette’s mind spun. Adrien squeezed her shoulder.

“Your Miraculous Cure healed her.” He explained. “Believe me, we were all just as shocked when she called my father’s phone. Apparently your ladybugs dropped her in his study.”

“Wh-why-HOW?” She spluttered. “I’ve used my miraculous cure dozens of times, why do this NOW?”

“Your cure can’t fix what you don’t know about. Well, sort of.” Tiki began to explain. “The cure works off of what you think should be right. So when the ladybugs fix akuma damage, it’s because you think that is wrong. You don’t have to know everything that broke or everyone that got hurt, just that they shouldn’t be.”

“If I had known it was that simple...I would have still been after your miraculous but I would have explained. I cannot begin to tell you how deeply sorry, and grateful I am Ladybug.” Gabriel said, holding Emilie close. “I know that in no way excuses what I’ve done to this city, or to your personally but believe me when I say I want nothing more to do with the miraculous.”

“You MURDERED dozens of innocent people, and you think you can just say SORRY?!” Alya stepped forward, jabbing him in the chest with a finger. Emile looked shocked, taking a step back from him.

“You what?”

“Volpina is the one responsible for this morning’s...unfortunate events.” Nathalie defended. Alya wasn’t hearing it.

“Volpina? You mean the akuma HE created? The one that, unlike Penknight, he could still control? You think we’re going to buy that?!” Alya demanded.

“Stop.” Luka’s voice cut through the growing argument. “Persecution can come later. We have bigger problems right now.” He looked down at her and continued “Penknight is tearing apart the city looking for Marc. We would have sent someone after him but…” He winced.

“Everyone was exhausted, our miraculous are gone, and you had checked off into lala land.” Chloe huffed from off to the side. “My suggestion to just let me take the ladybug earrings and deal with him was foolishly rejected.”

“And unanimously.” Adrien added. “We all really needed the rest. Penknight is mostly doing collateral damage and it may be selfish to think this, but that’s nothing the miraculous cure can’t handle when we do take him down.”

“He’s right Marinette, things can be replaced. You can’t. Your health comes first.” Tiki said, patting her knee. Now that she was coming out of her shock, she noticed the other miraculous she had been wearing were gone.

“Where are…?” She started to ask, patting herself down.

“You were exhausted and in shock. Even if they’re not activated the miraculous take a tiny bit of strength from you. Just one isn’t noticeable, but with the amount you were wearing…” Tiki explained.

“We thought it would be better to take them off. Don’t worry, they’re safe.” Adrien promised. “Plagg is nearby too, gorging himself on cheese.” The blonde boy looked exasperated, but fond.

“So what’s the plan, Ladybug, and don’t think I’ll forget that you didn’t tell me about that!” Alya asked, forcing a grin. Marinette looked around. They were all so tired.

“I guess I’ll accept an inferior miraculous to help sort this out. If I have to.” Chloe was studying her nails in fake disinterest. Sabrina nodded with more genuine enthusiasm from her side. Luka was a warm, comforting presence by her side. Adrien the same on the other. Marinette took a deep, calming breath and made her decision.

“Ladybug and Chatnoir are going to take down one last akuma.”

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“Can you hear him out there? The poor thing has absolutely lost his mind. How pathetic.” Volpina mocked, pausing in her detailed (and ever changing) rant about how she was going to make Marc pay for humiliating her as a furious scream sounded in the distance. Marc squirmed in the rickety chair he was tied to. He had no idea where the shadows had deposited them, but it looked abandoned. Dirt, dust, and broken plaster lay about. Plastic rustled in the breeze as it failed to cover the single, broken window. The brief glimpses of the skyline Marc had gotten through that window suggested they were a few stories up, at least.

Volpina began pacing and ranting about what she was going to do to him again (were we back to being boiled alive? Cool, Marc thought absently) the kwami of her stolen miraculous hovering silently as they had been ordered to. Marc’s heart wrenched as he watched the Barkk try to comfort a shaking Ziggy. His jacket was torn from where Volpina had ripped the goat miraculous away. Even more heartbreaking were the screams that kept drifting through the window on the wind. Penknight had spent the past two days more or less protecting him, only to have Volpina steal Marc from him as easy as one might candy from a baby. He couldn’t imagine how the akuma was feeling right now. His more pressing concern was escaping from Volpina. He needed a plan.

“Are you listening to me?!” Volpina demanded, slamming the chair he was tied to against the wall with one hand, getting in his face. The fox miraculous dangled so close he could almost...touch it...this was the dumbest idea he had ever had. Lunging forward, he grabbed the miraculous with his teeth and yanked. There was a brief moment when Marc feared his teeth were going to be torn out as Volpina stumbled backwards, but the chain snapped first.

“How DARE you-!”

“Trixx, Let’s Pounce!” The fox kwami gasped, zipping to his side as he was released from Volpina’s command.

“Trisch, Letsh Pounsh!” Marc said through clenched teeth. Apparently that was good enough for Trixx as Marc felt the transformation take him over. He saw Volpina realize what he was doing mid transformation and lunge at him in slow motion. Not even a fraction of a second had passed from completing the transformation to Volpina slamming him through the wall behind him. Wood and plaster shattered around them in a way Marc was sure would be extremely painful with the protection of the miraculous.

“That is MINE give it BACK!” Screeched Volpina, tearing at him. It was all Marc could do to keep her clawing hands away from the miraculous that now rested around his neck. Calling the struggle going on ‘wrestling’ would have been too generous. It was mostly just Volpina attempting to maul him as he frantically tried to escape. During the flailing his own hand managed to score lines across Volpina’s face. As she reared and shrieked, clutching at the bleeding cuts, he finally managed to scramble out from under her. Filing away the fact that he apparently had claws now for later, the unnamed fox hero dove for the open window.

“Shit shit shit.” He hissed as his leap thrust him into open air, the ground more than three stories away. Thankfully the miraculous must come with SOME sort of autopilot function as he instinctively hit the ground in a roll that brought him back to his feet, instead of splatting against the concrete. Two furious screams rang through the city, one coming from the condemned apartment building behind him, the other from further in the city.

Using his newly discovered claws to get to the top of the next building over, he headed for the more distant commotion. Volpina was so hot on his heels he swore he could feel her breath. The curses and threats she was screaming at him were certainly nothing he would repeat in polite company. The scenery streaked by him in a blur as he fervently hoped she would remain too incensed to remember she had more miraculous she could use.

Up ahead he could see Ladybug and Chatnoir squaring off against an absolutely furious Penknight. The rooftop they were on was littered with gouges and odds and ends Marc assumed the akuma had created to throw at the duo. They hadn’t noticed him yet.

“Help!” He shouted, bounding closer. Volpina just screamed insults behind him. The next moment couldn’t have been more than seconds but felt like it took forever. He saw a lightbulb go off in Ladybug’s head, she shouted something to Chatnoir, Marc dove for them, Chatnoir’s baton whooshed over his face so close he could almost taste it as he limbo slid under it, Volpina’s screaming cut off with a choking noise as the cat hero clotheslined her. Marc panted as he lay where he had skidded, more out of adrenaline than anything. The miraculous protected him from being out of breath from his frantic run. Ladybug’s yoyo goes clattering across the rooftop as Penknight manages to use the sudden chaos to bat it out of her hands.

“It’s me!” Marc squeaked, jumping between the Akuma and Ladybug, Penknight winding up for another swing.

“Marc?” The akuma questioned, suspicious.

“MARC!” Volpina screeched, getting her wind back. Chatnoir was equal parts trying to fend her off and grab her miraculous. Any of them.

“It’s him!” Ladybug promised, retrieving her yoyo to help Chatnoir.

“How do I know you’re not an illusion?” Penknight hissed, looking conflicted. Marc stomped on his foot. Like someone had flipped a switch, the snarling akuma transformed into a beaming hug monster.

“You took her miraculous!” He gushed. Marc squirmed away from him.

“Details later, taking Volpina down now!” Marc scolded as Chatnoir went sailing past them.

“You’ll never defeat me. I hold more power than any of you could possibly imagine!” Volpina snarled backing up.

“Don’t do it Volpina, you won't be able to handle the strain!” Ladybug pleaded, seeming to realize the vixen’s plan. Volpina just smirked.

“Wayzz, Barkk, Ziggy, Pollen, Roarr, Dusu, Unify!” What happened next was hard to describe. Multicolored light strobbed as wind pressure pushed everyone back. Volpina’s form rose from the ground and flickered like static, changing too fast for Marc to comprehend. The sound she was making was less of a scream and more of the universe ripping.

“We have to get the miraculous off her before they kill her!” Ladybug shouted over the wind.

“Why?” Penknight asked. He was ignored.

“How are we going to do that, My Lady? We can’t even get close!” Chatnoir asked, bracing against the wind.

“Lucky Charm!” Ladybug shouted, a heavy object thumping down in front of her.

“Is that...an electromagnet?” Marc questioned, grateful for Penknight’s grip on him. For some reason his transformation had made him even skinnier than he already was. Of the four of them he was having the most trouble keeping from being blown away. Maybe it was so he could leap rooftops easier? The flute strapped to his back wasn’t any good for that, unlike Chatnoir and Ladybug’s weapons. Now really wasn’t the time to think about that.

“Is that honestly going to work? Are the miraculous even magnetic?” Penknight wondered.

“It’s magic!” Ladybug snapped, looking around the rooftop in an attempt to find clues on how to use her lucky charm. “It cannot be as easy as flipping a switch.” She muttered to herself.

“My lady, if you do that, what about our miraculous?” Chatnoir questioned. Volpina’s eldritch screams were losing steam. Ladybug looked panicked.

“We’ll have to hold on to them and hope, but if I’m holding my earings I can’t flip the switch!”

“Oh please, allow me.” Penknight said eagerly, turning his sword back into a tablet and passing Marc to Chatnoir. Ladybug hesitated for a second, taking in the sight of Volpina being magically ripped apart and put back together, then nodded, firmly covering her ears with both hands. Penknight chuckled darkly as he flipped the switch. Marc dug in his heels, Chatnoir’s arm iron around his waist, as the powerful magnet tried to drag him forward by the miraculous.

At first Marc was worried the magnet wasn’t going to work, but then Volpina’s miraculous began to hit the magnet one by one with solid thunks. When the last one had been collected and Volpina lay dazed and panting on the rooftop, Penknight switched the magnet off. Ladybug stepped forward to check on Volpina, who only lay there and wheezed. Chatnoir began picking up the miraculous, handing the goat barrets to Marc with a smile when Ziggy zipped over to him for a hug.

“I can’t find her akumatized object.” Ladybug called to them, distressed. Volpina gasped a laugh and used the ledge of the rooftop to lever herself up.

“Oh, I’m sure you can figure it out if you think hard enough.” She mocked.

“Lila please, you almost killed yourself with that stunt. Let us purify you so you can rest and heal.” Ladybug pleaded, hands out to catch the akuma if she fell. Chatnoir’s eyes trailed down to where Volpina was clutching her chest.

“No.” He breathed.

“Yes!” Volpina cackled. “My akuma might be second hand from that miserable wretch Prism, but at least he knew where to hide it. The only good idea he’s ever had, I’ll wager.”

“Her heart.” Chatnoir said sounding numb, “The akuma is in her heart.”

“You see Ladybug, no matter what you’ve done I’VE won! You’ll never get my akuma without killing me, something you pathetic heroes will never have the stomach for!” Ladybug looked horrified, backing away from the laughing akuma.

“It’s only a matter of time before I take your miraculous and- Hrk!” She coughed, cut off mid sentence by Penknight’s sword going through her chest.

“Ugh, finally you stop talking. It’s a pity you’re probably going to be just fine after this, and I’ll have to go back to listening to your nattering.” Penknight grumbled, using his boot to push Volpina’s limp body both off his sword and the roof. Marc took in the akuma’s look of manic, wicked satisfaction as he watched the body fall and said:

“We have got to cure him.”

#Miraculous ladybug #Nathaniel Kurtzberg #marc anciel #Ladybug #Chatnoir #Holloa

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darkspellmaster · 6 years

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Fantastic Beasts Theory: Nagini, Credence, and Tom Riddle...

llWith all the hoopla going around over Nagini the more I read the more I have to wonder about the situation that is really happening in regard to the character. Now bare in mind, if you don’t like this character that’s up to you. I’m not going to sit here and tell people what they should or should not like.

However I have been seeing some misinformation being spread, so along with this theory I want to clear a few things up...

1. Regarding the character’s name.

Now most are positing that the name Nagini is strictly from the Sanskrit. However that is not 100% true. The word for a female snake is Nagi. Which, much like with the romantic languages (French, Spanish and Italian for instance), the word for snake has a male and female version. The name Nagini is actually a full name, and probably stems from the name Nagiana, created by R. Kipling, author of the Jungle book, who created the name for a female Cobra for his story Riki Tiki Tavi. Now the term Nag or Nagi is more connected with a King Cobra, over what Nagini is.

So while the name Nagi is Sanskrit, Nagini, probably is not. As for the reason she has the name. Well, it probably stems from the fact that it’s probably not her real name to begin with.

During the time period, namely the 20s and 30s, the idea of the orient was a big deal. Because, after WWI people were traveling again, and a number of people would travel to places like Japan, Hong Kong, India, etc, and collect items of decor, and the east was quiet the thing at the time because it was vastly different and had not been touched by the war as much as the west had.

The name Nagini, is probably her stage name, coined, more than likely, by the Empressario, (or boss) of the Freak show of the Circus she works for. Or she created the name herself, so as to seem exotic in nature as part of drawing in the customers. Keep this in mind for the second bit here.

2. Regarding her role in the circus Freak show. Okay this is a bit complex so bear with me here people. So to understand the idea of these shows and the reason for their existence we have to go way way back to the time of the courts. The Earliest known shows were back during the 1600s, and one of them was of conjoined twin brothers Lazarus and Joannes Colloredo. These shows tended to be of people (Including some that were fake) who had various disabilities or issues with them that gave them either an appearance of a “freak” or there was something to them that they could physically do, or their height, etc, and were actually well attended by the populace. The thing is that most of the people that were a part of these shows were there of their own volition. Now there were some where either a relation (parent or spouse) revived a payment for allowing the show to take the person in and exhibit them. But a large number of people that were involved in these enterprises actually gained a fair bit of celebrity. To the point that some actually got to meet the Queen. Most that signed up for this job typically had the goal of being able to be free to be themselves, travel and probably find a way to earn money and freedom. In addition most members of the show were friendly with one another for the most part and, as most in a circus would say, they became family. Now we don’t know a lot about Nagini as of yet, but we do know based on the ticket from above that she is one of the featured attractions. This usually indicates that the performer is probably a well paid member of the group and, more than likely, is known and probably a major reason for people to come to the show, so she would be treated with a lot of respect and care by the owner of the show. On top of that we know that Credence is someone that is moving around of his own choice, so we can assume that, given both are seen together and we later see her with the team, she probably has more freedom than we are assuming.

Also, as a point of reference for the character, one can look at the Phantom of the Opera novel, to see Erik, the main bad guy in that story, as someone that willingly signed up to be part of the show for both the pleasure of scaring people, as well as showing off his skills as a magician. And with Nagini, much like others who had a number of talents, (Magicians, music players, singers, poets etc.), it seems like her trick of changing probably isn’t the only thing she can do. 3. The actress playing her.

So about Claudia, and the role. I hear people saying that it’s not a good thing for this person to play this part. However, I will point out that not only are Snake women a thing in western tropes, they actually probably mostly originated from the Eastern stories of Snake women monsters. This is important in that, while in the west we’ve seen Asian characters be used in less than stellar ways, in China, Korea, Japan, India, and other east Asian territories, the idea of the Snake woman is a long, and I do mean, long, tradition in story telling.

Japan has at least one well known Yokai that matches Nagini’s looks save for a human head rather than a snake head, from the first series of books. So I have to wonder if the revulsion about having a Asian actress play a character that is probably seeped in lore far older than what we, as an English and American, have connection too is something that comes from our own issues regarding not having lore that we can connect to on that level? Honestly I think it actually makes more sense for Nagini to be Asian over say Indian, since in the case of snakes there’s more of a religious connotation to it and that would lead into a harder story to tell in 2 hours, vs. a character that has some connection to East Asian lore in regard to monsters that can be seen as both sympathetic and also vicious.

So now I want to quickly jump into a few theories on this character. If you got down here, yay. Good on you for reading this so far.

So Theory number 1.

Nagini’s curse and it’s connection to the real world issue of MS.

I do not know how many readers of JK’s works have sat down and read about her past? But, if you jump on Wikipedia and peruse about her early life before writing there are some clues as to why certain aspects of her books are the way they are.

Years prior during OotP and even PoA she mentioned that the dementors were a take on her own depression. If we also look at her situation with her own father and glance at her past relationship with her first husband, there’s some clues that Snape’s home life may be based around her own personal issues with her dad and husband, along with probably some connection to James Potter’s own less than stellar behavior in the later books.

With this in mind I’d like to draw attention to her late mother, whom I have a feeling Nagini’s Maladictious (did I spell that right?) curse may be connected to. So, apparently, Jo’s mother suffered, until her death (while she was writing the first books), with MS.

Now for those that don’t know, MS is a illness that over time makes it hard to move and can eventually kill you. This illness is something that tends to affect more women due, as far as studies have shown, to the higher protein found in our bodies. (While it can affect men, it’s known for hitting women more.)

So how is this tied to Nagini’s curse? Well, if I’m right on this, then a lot of the issues that Nagini’s going to suffer in regard to her curse, probably are going to be a lot like the symptoms of MS. Which takes away your limbs and your ability to use them. (Keep in mind I’m simplifying a lot of this.) My guess is that Jo probably is basing a lot of the issues that Nagini has physically with her curse on what happened with her mother and how that affected her and her work as a scientist, and probably how she tried to keep herself as free as possible while dealing with the limited time she had.

2. Her relationship with Credence and how that’s going to tie into her becoming a death eater and working for Voldemort.

Here’s the thing, I think Nagini’s going to be gray. Unlike Remus who had Severus giving him the potions and having people who had his back for the most part, Nagini strikes me as someone who probably has been on her own for a while.

She’s going to lose her battle with her curse eventually so I get the sense that she’s trying to live her life as long as she can, and with Credence having his own affliction, I get the feeling she sees a kindred spirit in him. Credence’s issues should have killed him, they hurt him, and I have to wonder if on the one hand she genuinely does care for him, and he’s falling in love with her, and on the other hand, she wants to manipulate him to see if there’s a way to free herself. We know that at one point they are on the roof and she gets him to let out his powers over the city. We know that this is a bad idea. The question is why? Why does she get him to do that? I don’t think she’s working with Grindlewald, as we see her with the good guy team in the end. But I don’t think she’s morally on the right. Given how other’s probably treat her at the show, even if she’s the one that is the most well know, there could be a issue regarding how she views the wizarding world in general that leads her to feel that non pure wizards need to pay a price.

I have to wonder if part of that might be due to the fact that Credence isn’t a pureblood, so she may see that as part of the reason why he may end up dead. Honestly I don’t see him living past the end of this series.

So for me, I’m guessing puppy love for him, friendship for her, with a sense that maybe she thinks he can fix or help her, and then that doesn’t happen. Or if he dies due to the half bloods, then probably that makes her lose her mind. Or Credence rejects her due to her actions, or thoughts, or even turning full snake on him. This could all lead up to her eventually meeting Tom.

3. Speaking of...Tom and her relationship.

Honestly, this is going to sound weird, but I get the feeling that this is not a case of control for him. Tom Riddle is many things, a monster, a killer, a destroyer. But the one thing I noticed is that he doesn’t cage people. What I mean is that, yes fear keeps those who are not loyal to him as part of his group. But no one is kidnapped or put in a cage to be a death eater. This is something you freely choose to be.

That brings me to Nagini. We’ve seen that Tom is a great manipulator, no doubt, especially when he’s older. But we’ve also seen that he’s someone that, while he has no love in his heart, has his own twisted affection for people. We know he’s the type that would have happily killed those that were annoying to him, but yet he let Haggrid live for example. So there’s some weird moral compass running the man. I don’t think he’s manipulating her, I don’t even think he sees her as a pet. The term could easily be one of endearment, especially considering that in all likelihood Tom may have learned of Nagini during his time at Hogwarts. Given that Fantastic beasts is supposed to cover up until probably the 1945 incident between Grindy and Albus, it’s not that hard to believe that Tom would have gleened info about her since he would be in school during the era when the last part of the story is going to take place.

If we assume by the time they meet she’s still mostly human or can turn human, a 19 year old boy that can probably understand her, since he has that skill regarding speaking snake and all, and probably is a charming SOB to boot, wouldn’t be to big of a leap of logic to see him connecting with her.

On the other hand, if she is a snake by then, it could be that he did still connect with her because he saw her human side in the snake and, while he couldn’t connect with humans he could connect with her. Given that, if she has reason to dislike people like Newt for possibly causing something to happen to Credence, it’s not that hard to see her becoming involved or loyal to Tom. What always bugged me about him was that he kept going more and more snake like, and now I have to wonder if there was some sort of connection between them. I’ll be it not in the romantic way that say McGonagall had for her husband, but more like something that’s a mix of lust and understanding maybe. I get the feeling that she may have become one of his first death eaters and probably the symbol that they have is based on her and her appearance.

Remember, with Nagini, this is a character who willingly ate a person whole. Who was sent out on a mission to Goderic’s hollow on her own, something no other death eater was allowed to do, to kill Bathilda, and she wore her skin. Nagini by that point had become as twisted and cruel as Tom was, and, given how protective she was of him, there was probably something deeply going on between them.

#harry potter #fantastic beasts movie #fbtcog #fantastic beasts the crimes of grindelwald #nagini #credence barebone #voldemort #lord voldemort #tom riddle #fantastic beasts theory

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venus-says · 5 years

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Symphogear AXZ Episodes 09-13

When bonds become miracles.

And we finally get at the end of the road on this marathon!

These past 2 weeks have been a wild and fun ride. I’m a mix of exhausted, happy, sad, and excited to close this project, so let’s dive right into it because I have lots of things to say!

So these first episodes (9 and 10) are a continuation of the “new combinations” mini ark that started in the last episode. And I kinda regret that I didn’t do any research beforehand because I could’ve planned these posts more efficiently, but oh well. XD

I’ll try to start with the things I didn’t like so we can move forward to the final ark on a good note.

I think I’ve mentioned this before but I have a serious love and hate relationship with Shirabe and Kirika. It goes more to loving Shirabe and hating Kirika most of the time, but this isn’t what happened in this ark.

Shirabe was very annoying in episode 9, and I think the writers did her very dirty for that episode in specific. They try to play out that because of the walls she built for herself she’s not so open to others and this affects her on battle because Kirika is the only one she can work along with. But that’s not really the truth because we’ve seen her work and get along with the other girls so why would this make her so uncertain about the whole situation? Like, even if you say you can’t make it work, it doesn’t mean you can’t even try, especially in the situation they were at that moment. Maybe it’s just me, but as I was watching every time Shirabe says she can’t work with anyone other than Kirika just sounds like jealousy and it just doesn’t work.

I believe the last minor thing I dislike in this part is Tiki. She’s annoying as fuck and she was getting on my nerves in these two episodes

Thankfully, as a counter-point to Shirabe annoyance, Kirika and Hibiki’s combination was very fun to watch, and even their interactions as civilians were pretty good and it gave a bit of lightness to such a dense period of the story. And I’m surprised how they managed to put things together to make such a beautiful moment in the end when Kirika jumps to save Hibiki and Saint-Germain, Kirika has already more than once talked about her birthday so when she falls out of the attack and let Hibiki knows why her birthday is so important the moment suddenly gets very emotional and it just works so beautifully.

Talking about the fights on the two episodes, as much as I like Tsubasa and her cool motorcycle their Fast & Furious fight was just so boring, and the way they didn’t even wanted to hear what Prelati had to say just made me roll my eyes even more. The fight against Saint-german was pretty cool, though my favorite part of it was Hibiki being Hibiki and trying to talk with her. If this was any other show I’d probably think this is dumb, but this is symphogear a show about people connecting and I just love these moments.

The last thing I have to comment on this little block, probably my favorite thing about episode 9, I believe they tried to set up a connection between Shirabe and the bunny shrine and I’m very excited to see if they’ll dive in Kirika and Shirabe’s past in XV.

The final ark had its ups and downs, but overall I liked pretty much all of it.

Episode 11 was pretty much just action, and it was pretty good, the choreography for that fight was pretty interesting and it was very good seeing Saint-Germain and Hibiki working together, I don’t know why but I had this “this is very satisfying I wanna see more of you” all the time while watching them fight Adam.

And speaking of him the revelation of him being a puppet was pretty shocking. I didn’t expect that at all, it was a good surprise.

If I have a problem with this episode in specific is that the solution of Gungnir being a philosophical armament was kinda a Deus EX Machina??? Like it came out of nowhere?? I believe they’d know about since they have Gungnir for years, even prior to the current events. I also didn’t like this because it makes that Hibiki is the only one who can truly fight this treat and it makes things less interesting. But they had some form of secrecy about the identity of who was helping the S.O.N.G. team and I wanna believe this is something relating to the next season so I’ll let it pass.

Also, they kinda turn Hibiki into a God and that’s a fucking big deal so...

I like the poetry of making all of the final events play in Hibiki’s birthday, especially if you consider that she was kinda reborn after being released of the God’s power and all. The whole plan to set her free was pretty interesting as well, I wish that the secret weapon they had relating to Miku was giving her Sheshoujing back so that she could get near “God Hibiki” and talk to her more directly, but it still worked fine (besides the moment when they throw the anti-LiNKER in the two buttcheecks of the manifestation of a God).

And it is here where we reach the highest point of this finale when we get to see that, in Genjuuro’s words, people can connect and work together as one. And the big climax moment isn’t against a villain but is the villains getting redemption in a pretty good way. I did dislike the fact that neither Cagliostro or Prelati were actually dead, I think it’d make a better thematic rhyme if in that moment it was just Saint-Germain and the other two manifested near her because of the resolve in her heart and by the influence of heavenly power around her, but nonetheless it was still pretty good, and it somehow brings us back to season 1 finale that I loved.

Sadly this isn’t the end of the season because we didn’t get to use the opening as an attack yet.

And the first part of episode 13 broke the mood for me. Adam revealed a beast form, and once again the final fight isn’t a direct straight forward combat where both sides are trying to argue to finish the situation in the best way possible, just a big fight.

But hey! They turned Hibiki into a Gold Saint and she finished Adam off with a Pegasus Meteor Fist right in his monstrous stomach. At that moment I was just clapping in standing ovation because is so absurd.

The final slice of life part of the episode was pretty good, even Tsubasa’s grandpa being a major dumbass I enjoyed. Of course, to me, this would be even more perfect if we’ve had cut from the alchemists saving the city direct to this more normal environment, but I still like it.

We have Maria feeding Tsubasa and the latter being out of her character because of tomatoes. 10/10 high-quality content.

The post-credits scene was quite interesting and i’m very glad that I’m watching this one day before the new season comes out because it’d kill me all the questions they’ve dropped on top of my head like if it was nothing. Is Miku free from Balal’s curse? Does she also have the ability to be a vessel for divine power? Will she ever get her gear again? What does all of that mean??? I NEED ANSWERS.

Hopefully tomorrow we’ll have some of them. I don’t know when I’ll be able to watch XV’s first episode, but as soon as I do I’ll post a review so be in alert for it!

Before I go, I’d like to once more thank everyone who stuck with me during the past 12 days. If everything goes right this week I’ll try to get more active in here again and I hope I’ll still have you all with me. Thank you and see ya~

#Senki Zesshou Symphogear AXZ #Symphogear AXZ #symphogear

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cartoons-tothemoon · 6 years

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Zak Storm Origins Part 1 Live-Blog:

Hello! The Miraculous Ladybug PV Discord recommended the show heavily as a better alternative to ML when it comes to certain writing things that get on our nerves, so they recommended Zak Storm, and now I am watching it. Such is life.

I’ll put all my commentary in stuff in the “read below” section, so I don’t clog up your dash if you don’t want to see it. Have a nice day!

- First things first, I want you to know that the only things I know about Zak Storm is that it’s about a brown haired pirate kid and the Bermuda Triangle. That’s it. I’ve skimmed some of the post edorazzi does about Zak Storm, but I really mean that I skimmed it. I’m going into this effectively blind, so, this should be interesting for all of us.

ORIGINS PART 1:

- The theme song is very radical, I guess. Nothing makes sense, but the theme music’s cool.

- Man of Action, as mentioned in the theme song, is the company that created Ben Ten, of course, my memory’s pretty bad, so I could be wrong.

- Panning over the background for ambience’s sake. There’s surfboards, a tiki head, a globe, a starfish, some fishing wire in a cabinet, a swordfish, a sea shell, etc. It’s very nautical themed but, then again, I don’t know what I expected from a show about pirates.

- The man fiddling with the radio appears to be Zak’s father/uncle/general caregiver, and seems to have a degree. The font is too small and blurry to make out, but I suppose it implies that he’s not the bumbling fool that the Hawaiian-styled shirt implies.

- A map and an eel-head. Huh.

- He SNEAKS. *Knocks over a bunch of stuff as he attempts to escape the scene of his crime.* He attempts to SNEAK.

- Classic beleaguered father figure and classic probably cursed necklace. Considering Zak knows of the necklace, as well as its existence, it’s probably not that bad though.

- Wow. I can’t believe ZAG actually put in the time and effort to actually animate water here. On one hand, it’s necessary, but on the other hand, in Miraculous Ladybug, literally nobody ever cried until Syrena. It was just weird sniffling. I got distracted, bottomline, good job for doing the absolute bare minimum here, Zag.

- How confident is this Zak kid that he can surf while listening to music and playing on his phone? What a guy.

- AND he’s on a webcam. Wow.

- His English voice sounds kinda cute, though, in an Ash Ketchum kind of way.

- He’s literally just the protagonist in a JRPG game. So, yeah, Ash Ketchum. “Pressure? What’s that?”

- His dad/uncle/care-giver’s head looks really small in comparison to his body, but that’s more of a “my opinion” kind of thing, given how relatively realistic ZAG tries to keep the proportions.

- Wow, those storm clouds appeared really quickly.

- Was the whole storm thing mentioned on the radio earlier? I wasn’t really listening.

- “Take off the necklace” is the necklace the one thing that’s keeping him from capsizing or on the board or? Otherwise, why would Zak grab it?

- I’m barely 2 minutes in. Sorry for this effectively frame-by-frame analysis, but in my defense...I’ve never done this before.

- “How do we make those dark storm clouds shrouding our protagonist in disappointment more ominous?” “I dunno, man, a skull?” “Genius.”

- Storm family magic. I knew it.

- A potentially tragic misunderstanding is going on here.

- Whoops. I guess I expected the dad/uncle/care-giver figure to be more emotionally distraught over potentially losing his son to a mystical portal forever, but...We barely know them and he clearly knows the necklace, so, he may...Be fine?

- Never mind. He’s probably not fine. Also, why is he not more panicked to be surfing around lightning? Probably shock.

- Cool water animation, though.

- Zak, I haven’t really grown emotionally attached to you yet, and I want to like you, but please stop with the dumb slang.

- Huh, so it was his dad, after all.

- On one hand, the whole “I must be dreaming thing” is very cliche, on the other hand, I feel bad for this small child who’s abandoned in the middle of the ocean with only a webcam, surfboard, and dumb necklace and crying out for his dad, that I’ll let it slide.

- Green and red, the most insidious colors imaginable. At least it isn’t red and black.

- This green skull guy looks almost 2D animated in the first shot, which is not a bad look.

- I like that boat design for that golden skull guy, at least, a lot more than what looks like Zak’s ship, but I suppose he’s supposed to have that generic pirate look.

- Never mind. It’s less generic than I thought it would be.

- He’s still going along with the nightmare idea, He’s in shock, He’s trying his best, I remind myself.

- Yay! Tiny British ghost friend! Also, who are you calling him small? The ghost friend looks to be a child.

- Scratch that. Tiny, maybe British, astral-projecting spirit friend who’s bad at jokes.

- Cool name for a boat, but aren’t boats usually called she's? Eh, whatever.

- Wow, already trying to escape. 2 minutes with tiny spirit friend who’s name...Hopefully hasn’t been mentioned yet because it shows how well I can pay attention to the forest, and you��re already trying to abandon him.

- “Eye of Peru,” just where does this take place? It’s clearly not in some weird alternate fantasy world if countries from our world exist.

- Clovis. That’s the tiny British spirit friend. I have no strong feelings about him whatsoever.

- Okay, seriously though, Goldenbone’s voice is very cool sounding. Just very classically threatening. It’s kinda like Slade with a bit more energy put into it, but I’m not sure if that statement is right.

- Zak has such dumb sneakers I love him.

- Wow, actual guns. Those look like legitimate pistol designs, but they shoot laser beams. We had to get them through the censors somehow, I guess.

- I think this is the first time I’ve seen a hook hand actually used for something useful outside of just looking cool and threatening.

- “You have a salty spirt, boy.” Dang, who’s Zak vagueing about now.

- Please don’t say good boy. That’s a very cursed phrase if you aren’t talking about an aging labrador.

- I love how Clovis just low-key called him an idiot. Zak really is just a JRPG protagonist, all shiny and dumb and easy to trick, but it would be bold of you to assume that I don’t love him for it.

- Also! Bermuda Triangle! One of the only things I knew about the series has at last been integrated.

- “Let me talk to him.” Why? Why would background skeleton #423 actually suggest this? Does he think he’s special? Because he’s going to have a bad time looking into that mirror and seeing everybody he’s ever known there.

- Why is the Bermuda Triangle just a myth or a legend in this world? It’s a region in our world that’s known for its ship disappearances, it’s not entirely explained, but it’s not like it’s the jersey devil or anything.

- “Surf rat and internet wannabe.” Well, at least he’s honest.

- Clovis confirmed for ectoplasmic whatever, but is also totally a poltergeist.

- 13:55-14:20...Sigh.

- So, does Goldenbone being dead allow him to touch both corporeal and non-corporeal beings, or is Clovis constantly tangible but also not?

- Oh never mind this was actually explained.

- Yes, Zak. Listen to your strange magical heirloom here for once.

- You know what’s worse than a sword? A talking sword.

- Ah, yes, the classic ZAG transformation sequence. This totally won’t happen every single episode to add run-time and repeat animation.

- You’d also think he’d be used to this by now, or just completely out of it given everything that’s been happening.

- I wish they did more animation with the fire, but that’s really a nit-pick.

- What’s up with Clovis just...Continually doing peace signs. Does he not know what else. he can do with his hands.

Conclusion: Zak is dumb but I love him. Golden bones is evil but trying his best here. Clovis is also there. Why does he have a cockney accent. Good show. 7/10.

#me #live blogging #live blog tag #zak storm

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tokyotheglaive · 7 years

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The Problem of Valter

So, I realized while I studying for the MCAT (lol) that a lot of my beef with Valter has very little to do with his creepy factor and more with how it’s used. I’m going to put all of this below a cut because I want to talk very frankly about the horribleness that is Valter of FE8 and how (surprisingly) I think that the narrative as it stands shortchanged him as a villain.

I want to do a couple of things with this analysis. First and foremost, I want to establish some facts. First I’m going to talk about Valter’s backstory, particularly as seen in Duessel’s A-support with Cormag. Then I’m going to talk about Valter vis-à-vis the other six Generals of Grado, with a specific emphasis on Riev and Caellach. Last, I want to dive into my actual reason for getting this started, which is this: Valter could have been an incredible villain and a perfect foil for Lyon.

The thing with Valter that sort of hit me just now as I was looking at the difference between logos, pathos, and ethos was that he hasn’t always been this way. It’s irrelevant to the main route, but you find in Duessel’s support with Cormag that Valter, having lost his weapon in a fight, took up a cursed heirloom from Duessel and it “drove him mad”.

Yes… …We were in the middle of a battle. Valter had broken his lance, and when I wasn’t looking he somehow took this one. From that moment, he was changed… He killed everyone–even retreating men. I took the lance from him when I realized what had happened, but it was too late. Madness had awakened within Valter and was coursing through his body. From then on, he hungered only for battle and for blood… It’s not as though Valter was a gentle lamb before, but now his appetite for violence increased many times over. It’s all because of this cursed lance.

That’s Duessel’s actual statement. Now, I find it highly improbable that Valter “somehow” managed to snag a cursed lance from Duessel’s possession, much less one that seems to radiate that burning sort of evil that both he and Cormag seem to agree that it does. All of this indicates to me that Duessel made a miscalculation worse than he admits: he gave Valter the lance.

Now, why would he do such a thing? He admits freely that he doesn’t feel the same sort of malice from it that another might. It’s entirely possible that he, at the time, didn’t think that the lance was actually cursed in the literal regard, that the family tradition that it only be used when “madness itself rules the day” was simply an elaborate hoax to keep someone from rushing off to the battlefield and breaking an heirloom. It’s also possible that Duessel, curious about the lance, brought it to the battlefield specifically to use it/have someone else use it. Why the hell would you cart a lance you cannot use around a battlefield? It doesn’t make sense. It’s bulky, it’s heavy, and ultimately, it’s dead weight.

He did take it with him during that fight (and again and again, we can infer, considering he still has it with him when he’s talking to Cormag). I think it’s odd that he has the lance with him after Valter used it, but I’ll come back to that in a bit because I want to talk specifically about the problem of Valter. Duessel took the lance into battle for reasons unknown, Valter acquired it, used it, and went mad.

We never get to see Valter pre-madness. As a matter of fact, within the realm of the main story, we never get to see Valter as anything other than mad. Amongst the six Generals of Grado, he’s arguably the most vile. Glen and Duessel are the least deplorable of the bunch. Glen possesses ideals and an innate sense of right and wrong. He’s willing to consider the possibility that perhaps Grado isn’t going in the right direction. Duessel seems to have less conviction and less of a willingness to examine alternate routes--that being said, he does defect to your army, so there’s that. Selena’s real downfall is her inability to see beyond her love for the Emperor and for Grado as a whole. She willingly blinds herself to atrocity, and that in turn makes her complicit. Riev has supernatural darkness in him, that sort of mad-scientist nonsense involving monsters and magic. His evilness is tied up in his magic and the “fell arts”. Same with Formortiis/Lyon. The only other contender for “evil” is Caellach, and even he can pretty much only be classified as callous and opportunistic. Valter, though--Valter is something else.

I think what makes Valter so incredibly off-putting is that his evil is entirely human (at least within the realm of the main story) and entirely deliberate. He objectifies Eirika, and his misogyny disgusts the audience. He murders Glen, and as always, the death of a good man leads to the hatred of his killer. He cuts down innocents left and right. He is the ultimate evil, and yet he is human. Emphasized specifically in Heroes but also in FE8 as well (to the best of my recollection), Valter hungers. He devours in a purely human, purely barbaric manner. He has no concept of order or future. He merely relishes destruction. There’s no sorcery here. Valter is an absolute evil--an absolute human evil.

But he’s not, right? He used a cursed weapon. It’s the lance’s fault. He was a regular dude before then, just one with a taste for the battlefield. Based on the description, you might even say he used to be a Hector or a Skrimir--eager for a fight, not so interested in the consequences or the politics. By FE logic, there’s nothing inherently wrong with a character like that, though they could use a lesson or three on why peace and diplomacy exist and are good things to use from time to time.

Except, can we really blame the lance?

We have no other knowledge about what the lance does, why it’s like this, or if it behaves differently in different hands. We know that Duessel had to have gotten it back from Valter at some point--and boy, can you imagine what that encounter would have looked like? “Excuse me, Sir Valter, may I have that lance back? You see it’s a cursed artifact that’s just driven you mad but it’s a family heirloom and I must have it back.” I can’t imagine that something that exudes that sort of evil power, power enough to turn a man into canon-Valter, would be something that he’d want to just hand back over.

Which leads me to my big idea: it’s not the lance that’s directly at fault. Not by a longshot. I hypothesize that the cursed lance is a lot like Marvel’s superhero serum as administered to Steve Rogers: it amplifies traits, both positive and negative, to extremes. Someone like Valter, who possessed a certain love of battle, turned into a ferocious, bloodthirsty monster. Unlike the serum, this takes time.

Valter didn’t turn into a madman overnight. Valter slowly, over weeks or months, lost his inhibitions. Things he might have thought or imagined became the things he said and believed. Maybe he never really respected women but knew that just coming out and objectifying them wasn’t something that would be good. Maybe he understood the line between soldier and civilian and only rarely had thoughts, perhaps even intrusive ones, about crossing it. Then came the fight, the lance, and suddenly there’s a growing darkness in him that encourages him to act on these urges.

Sound familiar? That’s a lot like what happened to Lyon.

Lyon essentially was “corrupted” by the Demon King. It’s impossible to distinguish how much of his darkness was his own, lying in wait, lurking under the surface, and how much got injected arterially by the Demon King, but some of that evil was Lyon, and none of it was on the surface when he, Eirika, and Ephraim were kids.

We get to see a little of how Lyon breaks down over the course of the game. We don’t get to see a lot because ~spoilers~ not that everyone doesn’t see this coming from seventeen billion miles away, but we see a bit. The thing that pisses me off is that we don’t see it with Valter.

Think about what we could have had. Valter, flawed, not good but not evil. Valter starting out more like Duessel or Glen and progressing until he was his own classification of horrible. Valter proving that a “good” person contains just as much capacity for evil as someone as obviously bad as Riev. Sure there’s a “cursed lance” that pushes him along that path, but ultimately? There’s no Demon King whispering in his head that this is the way to do things. Valter’s just a man without inhibitions, the most frightening thing of all.

Fire Emblem games rarely feature antagonists with purely human rationale. Everyone’s either possessed, not human to begin with, or else succumbing to “dragon madness” or whatever the deal was with Tiki and the rest when it came to dragonstones and stuff. Ashnard’s the only one I can think of who really broke that mold, though Zephiel might have as well (never played the game, I’m guilty, I’m sorry). Ashnard, of course, has canonically always been the way that he was. He’s his own sort of absolute. But with Valter they had an opportunity, a unique one within the series, to explore human darkness and what it means to “go mad”, not in the psychological sense but from a moral standpoint.

#valter #fe8 #I don't know how to even begin to tag this

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distinctivelibrarians · 7 years

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Could you write something about Ezekiel having ptsd flashbacks and thinking he's still in the game while they're in the middle of a party or something? Bonus points if it's Jake/Ezekiel?

Thanks for the prompt! I hope this fits what you were looking for!

(warnings: panic attacks, flashbacks, violence)

Ezekiel was fine.

That wasn’t a deflection by the way. He knew, compared to some other people, and even according to some other people, he was definitely not fine. But on his own scale, looking back at where he was months ago - hell, even a couple of weeks ago - he was fine. And in a few months, he knew, he’d be looking back at this moment and going ‘like hell that was fine, this is fine.’

And that was okay too.

Still didn’t mean he wanted to tell anyone on the team. He was dealing with this on his own - whatever this was; PTSD and/or paranoid-anxiety were the two he’d settled on recently, after months of quiet research on his own, poking around online forums and support groups at a pace he felt he could handle.

And he was fine.

Didn’t mean he was perfect though. But, he liked to think his panic attacks and flashbacks were getting more spread out - less frequent, and less intense.

Easier to hide too, if he was being honest. His teammates weren’t stupid, and he knew it was only a matter of time before someone caught him out in a big way. And he’d much rather be a little farther along that fine scale when that happened, thanks.

So, while he knew he wasn’t perfect, he didn’t expect tonight to be all that bad. The clippings book had sent them them out, like normal; this time, running after the Lampades’ Torch, a funny little lighting fixture that had the unfortunate side effect of driving those in its light mad. Ezekiel thought it was a little unfair that the thing could change shape, but that was neither here nor there. He’s sure Jacob had an explanation for it or something - he’d tuned the other man out about halfway through the rant on the Lampades’ connection with Hecate and something about the underworld.

It’s not that he thought Jacob’s explanations were boring - whatever Jenkins said, he actually did find history interesting sometimes (and it had nothing to do with Jacob getting excited at the barest show of interest, not at all) - it’s just that Jacob was still explaining on their way to the frat house they’d tracked the thing down to.

Which. Question. Why a frat house? Jacob probably had an answer to that too, and they’d probably passed it about half an hour ago. Oh well - he could ask Cassandra for the highlights later.

Eve and Flynn had elected to stay back when they’d found out where the Torch was - something about sticking out like sore thumbs due to their age or whatever. Cassandra had suggested Jacob stay back then too, mostly teasing, which had gotten a squawk and a lot of grumbling on their way out the Back Door.

So. Simple plan really. Find the Torch, cover it, and bolt back through the Back Door before anyone was the wiser.

They didn’t really plan on the frat house being in the middle of a party - homecoming if the half torn down banner was anything to go by. As far as Ezekiel was concerned, that just made it easier to slip in unnoticed. At a look, they all split and disappeared into the crowd.

The crowd was still in that excitable, cheery stage of drunk - no one was yelling excessively, no one was picking a fight, everyone just enjoying the bass and occasional scrap of actual music that could be heard over the crowd, and the proximity with everyone else. Ezekiel was pretty sure that’d last maybe another hour, hour and a half. With any luck, they’d be well gone by then.

If asked later, he could maybe say it was the elbow to the back as he slid through a too-small space between people. Maybe the high-pitched shriek that dissolved into giggles the next room over. Hell, maybe just the press of bodies, but one moment he was moving, looking too hard at every source of light he could and the next-

-where was Eve? Where the fuck was Eve? She’d just been at his side, swinging a crowbar while he’d gone to town with the bat, every other second punctuated by the sick crack of aluminum on flesh and bone. Another spray of blood to the face (someone’s drink, some small, unheard part of his brain would record for later). Another swing, another crack that echoed despite the yells and groans blocking out his own thoughts.

“Eve! Eve, where- Eve!” his voice cracked, hard enough to hurt, familiar enough to push past to keep calling her name. She was suddenly at his side, shouting something, arms and front covered in blood and something darker he didn’t want to think about, knuckles white around her crowbar, and still breathing, still going, thank god.

She was shouting something, even as she kept swinging. He heard the words - could pick out where one started and the other began - but for the life of him, couldn’t string them together.

Then she was in his face, grabbing his arms, stopping his swing and no, no, they had to keep fighting, they had a chance, just a few more feet and they’d be at the save-

“-ekiel! Ezekiel! Come on man, come back to me- here we go.” That last part wasn’t directed at him, and why he could tell that but not where he was, why his feet were still moving, why he couldn’t move his arms, was beyond him.

Jacob’s face picked that moment to come into focus, leaving Ezekiel with a nauseating double vision where Jacob was there, but so was Eve, still in his face, still yelling something he couldn’t parse.

He saw the change in rooms - out of the crowded hallway, into a dark, quiet(ish) bedroom - as he was dragged more than felt his feet actually moving. Which probably explained why he stumbled and dropped heavily as soon as Jacob let go to close the door behind them. There was a sharp sound - Jacob cursing, that unhelpful little piece of his mind supplied, completely unheard - and Jacob was back in his space, touching long enough to get Ezekiel seated against the wall before withdrawing his touch, but not his presence.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I needed to get you out of there, I’m sorry I had to grab you-” He must’ve made a pained sound, because Jacob’s mouth snapped shut with a click. His eyes tracked over his face, but Ezekiel couldn’t say what the other man saw. He was still coming to grips with a couple things - like, suddenly they’re in a dark room when he was pretty sure last he’d seen he’d been on his own in a crowd of people and Eve had been there and-

He choked as he inhaled too sharply, caught between shouting for Eve and gasping in relief because Eve wasn’t there and that was a good thing this time and the air burned down his throat, sending him coughing. Jacob let out a harsh sound beside him, hands coming up to do- something, Ezekiel didn’t know and was too focused on dragging air into his lungs around the coughing to care much. They never made contact anyway, not until he’d finally caught his breath and was slumped back against the wall again.

“Is- is it okay if I touch you?” it took him a moment to recognize Jacob’s voice, pitched too low, fighting with the bass he could now pick out in the background noise. He sounded like when he was pulling Cassandra out of a spiral. Huh.

His throat clicked when he tried to answer so he just nodded. Jacob muttered something again, too low for Ezekiel to catch, pushing back into his space as he settled against the wall beside him, an arm coming around his shoulders to pull him close. It left him able to pull forward if he wanted to escape, but still with support at his back and side, and he felt himself go limp against his side with a groan.

He didn’t know how long they sat there - it felt like hours, but was probably closer to minutes - but Jacob didn’t say a word, his thumb rubbing heavy circles into his shoulder, grounding like nothing else Ezekiel had tried in these past couple of months.

His breathing went through rough, jagged panting, to shuddery, to just… exhausted, but steady, and he found he didn’t want to move even by the time his hands stopped shaking - when the hell had they started? - and Jacob didn’t seem in a hurry to make him.

He was vaguely aware of Jacob shifting at one point, and he didn’t mean to, but he tensed at the idea of Jacob - this grounding comfort beside him that he could maybe be embarrassed about later - leaving. He didn’t though, just pulled out his phone to check something, tapping out a quick reply one-handed before tucking it away again.

“Cassandra found the Torch. Out back - apparently masquerading as a tiki torch. She’s already back in the Library.” his voice stayed that low rumble from earlier and Ezekiel found himself relaxing that little bit more.

His limbs felt heavy when he finally felt like the ground beneath him wasn’t about to tilt or shake or vanish, but he pushed himself away, Jacob’s arm falling easily to let him.

“…I’m gonna go get some water. You gonna be okay for a minute?” he waited for Ezekiel to nod again before pushing himself up and slipping out, closing the door behind him. Ezekiel wasn’t a huge fan at being alone - the dark, though a hell of a lot easier on his sense than any light would be, he knew, had an unfortunate side-effect of giving everything a slightly unreal look and even though the ground wasn’t coming up to swallow him anymore, there was still the sound of teeming bodies just beyond the door, and he could still hear someone shouting… something, and that bass was grating at his ears and was that Eve shoutin-

“Hey, here, take a drink okay?” When did Jacob get back? He blinked a couple times and the room settled back into place, Jacob crouched in front of him, holding out a plastic cup, eyeing him worriedly.

Rather than say anything to that, he just took the cup, gulping the water down greedily when the first sip didn’t immediately make his stomach squirm. When the hell had his throat gotten that dry?

“…Good?” Jacob asked when he was done. Ezekiel paused, running through a checklist he’d developed in the past couple months - he was still at the frat house; they’d been here for the Lampades’ Torch; Eve and Cassandra were back at the Library; nothing was going sideways, nothing hurt besides his throat; the place around him smelled like sweat and alcohol, only somewhat muffled by the door; he could hear people, but they sounded as cheerful as they had when he’d approached the place. Jacob waited patiently, watching him quietly.

“…Think so.” his voice sounded scratched all to hell, but he could talk, so he’d call that a win. Jacob visibly relaxed anyway, so definitely a win.

Ezekiel had a vague notion he should probably be feeling embarrassed right now (which was bullshit, he knew, but he had the idea that a lot of people would be, so maybe he should too), being caught out that badly, in the middle of a case, but all he really felt was tired. And Jacob wasn’t asking for an explanation, wasn’t pushing him to spill his guts here and now.

So. If that vague notion ever actually became a thing, it could be later. Or not at all. He’d prefer not at all, honestly. This was the fastest he’d come down since this whole mess started and he really just wanted to get home to sleep off the adrenaline crash he could feel sluggishly crawling through his body.

“You okay to go? We can get back to the Library and then get you back home.”

“Ah… yeah, sounds good…” there was a part of his brain yelling that going back to the Library meant the others would see him and he didn’t really like the idea of that right now, but was too exhausted to put his finger on why-

“Hey Jenkins,” Jacob was already on the phone. He really needed to move slower, Ezekiel was missing too many movements, “we need a door, and a turn around to Ezekiel’s place. Someone caught a lucky punch in the crowd, so he’s a little out of it. No concussion that I can tell, think he just needs to rest soon. Yeah, I’ll stay with him,” he paused, glancing at Ezekiel. Looking for permission he realized. Ezekiel blinked, then nodded.

The idea of being alone, now that he was thinking about it, wasn’t exactly pleasant.

“Thanks Jenkins.” he ended the call, tucking the phone back in his pocket. “Alright, up ya get.” he kept his hands in Ezekiel’s line of sight, moving slowly enough that he could pull away if he wanted. Fuck that. His legs felt like jello.

He didn’t quite cling to Jacob like a limpet, but it was close. Something else he could maybe be embarrassed about later (but not likely).

In the morning, he’ll remember stumbling into the Library, only to do an about face and stumble into his living room. For now, he just recognizes the door to his room and shuffles that way, fully intending to collapse and sleep for the next twelve hours.

“If you need anything, I’ll be out here okay?” he paused, glancing back. Right, Jacob.

“Ah… right, thanks.” He was pretty sure his smile was too small, too thin, but Jacob seemed to take it for what it was, and smiled back before dropping on the couch.

Ezekiel made it to his room without any other interruptions. And, if he left the door open just enough to hear when Jacob started snoring from the couch. Well, being alone still didn’t sound like that great an idea is all.

#my writing #ff #the Librarians #Ezekiel Jones #Jacob Stone #ptsd tw #violence tw #its not a lot of violence but just in case #if anyone thinks there needs to be another tag let me know!#long post #Anonymous #I'll probably post this to ao3 tomorrow

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docboots · 7 years

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On Social Security Disability/SSI

Now let's get to the crack team of people working on our disability cases. Least in the California/Nevada side. So before my first denial, my case was apparently tossed back and forth between an office in my current home state of Nevada, and my birth state of California. This made it difficult to contact them. In fact, even when they kept sending me letters to contact them, they never answered the phone nor returned my calls when I left a message with my claims handler. I kind of wish I was back in that lovely back and forth. At least I wouldn’t be concerned they are gaslighting me.

Throughout this process I am trying to send them blood tests (as this is a blood disease technically, so the proof is in jittery intern needle pricks), pictures showing my swollen hand held up next to my non swollen hand, document after document that they sent me constantly badgering me for my day to day activities of not stressing out about my day to day activities (which eventually lead to a chart explaining my disorder as they clearly were not getting how being allergic to stress is at all an issue in the job market, and how going to college to get a degree for a less stressful job is shockingly counter-intuitive), and some other important medical documents. That was a year ago. I found out a couple months ago they never got those documents. Remember that, as this part of the story happened a year or more ago.

Eventually, I get notice I need to go to a doctor and a shrink for my physical and medical evaluation. The ones they picked out and asked me to go to, mind you. This is also something you should remember.

As I still couldn’t get a hold of my claims handler at this time and being naive and innocent to the idea they may be actively fucking with me, I brought every bit of proof I wanted them to have and ask them to send it to them. As I imagined the doctors would have a quick, foolproof method of getting in contact with Social security and giving them all these papers. They do this all the time after all.

Now that you are back from the surgical procedures your insurance won’t cover from busting your gut laughing at the poor sweet innocence in that thought, I am sure you will be not at all surprised that, a year later, I found out they never got those files. Remember how I told you to remember those previous bits? Well, sadly we ain’ done with this chapter of the future explanations of why I have an aneurysm, so continue remembering and lump this lunacy in with it. The doctor didn’t even make note of me giving them those files. Not surprising. She did nothing to help her figure out my disability and instead had me do stretches meant for a back problem and limb issues. I wasn’t swelling at that time. I had pictures showing me swollen, showed them to the doc myself. NO mention in the notes though. How strange.

So, after what felt like an eternity I got my first denial letter. Back in October 2016. I almost felt like framing the damned thing, as strangely enough spite seems to be the main thing that keeps me functioning these days. The reason in this denial letter is 1) they didn’t see me having it for longer than a year. As I have had it for 27 years and had it plaguing my life for 11, I think I ruined my eyesight in one eye a little from the frequency it twitched. PRactically heard the click of an ancient movie camera. The second reason was 2) because they didn’t see it affecting my ability to work. Which after a long line of being fired, fucked with, or ignored about my disorder until forced to quit due to pain and danger to my health... As I was still working with the assumption they had the papers I had all but sent a herd of owls to get to them. I might even be subjected to finding stamps (Of the licking and mailing variety)! Surely the email had sent it to them, but shockingly no.

So I get a lawyer. Correction, I try to. After countless calls that end in a ‘we’re booked up’, ‘we can’t take your case’, and one getting me to stop going to community college (graphic design at the time. I was swollen almost 24/7.. Better than culinary, computer science, and engineering before that! But nah. Clearly fine to work) because “no lawyer would take you as it is considered work’. No one fires me from school. Any job I could actually get? Not as lenient I am afraid. Not to the guy in his twenties who smokes pot, is hyperactive, and has this weird allergy to stress. I am sure EVERYONE fucking believes me when I say that. Can you sense the sarcasm? CAN YOU READ THE AGITATION AND PAST EXPERIENCES IN THE SUBTEXT? Well, now you do whether you wanted to or not. Quite stressful really.

Finally, someone agrees to help me, even files the appeal for me same day I meet them. You think this is where the triumphant trumpets would play. Nah. Turns out after seeming like he would be helpful, getting me to have my doctors and such fill out paperwork, get more blood tests to prove I STILL have the damned thing, blah blah, all of which were sent to him. (-sigh- Remember that) to send to the main office. Suddenly, I get a call from my claims handler! Losing the bet with myself that it was a cardboard cut out in an office chair with a voice recorder taped behind it, I got a physical being for once.

Turns out they had been trying to contact my ‘lawyer’ for the past few days and they weren’t answering. I tried to call them, still not answering. Weeks go by and we still can’t get ahold of him nor can I get a hold of the tiki god that has apparently cursed my bloodline for dishonoring their totem. Claims handler, in an eye-twitchingly HILARIOUS turn of events, is actually answering my calls now. Sadly, my lawyer still isn’t. Minus answering my voicemail complaining about all this with an ‘I’ll get right on it’ voice mail.

Also, this is when I learned they don’t have any of my blood tests, files, or pictures. The ones I have been sending them, been giving to lawyers and doctors they sent me too, is not in their files at all.

As well, in order to fire my lawyer in the case of being unable to get them to pick up your calls, you apparently need to write a handwritten, signed note. Then mail it to them. Which I did, folded over the countless things they should have had ages ago.

Week later? They have those files, nothing about that handwritten note that was literally folded around these things. Whatever, clearly, they just haven’t processed it. I never found out what happened to this magic letter and then I am left to wait after I ask if there is anything they need, and I go on the hunt for a new lawyer. Turns out, since the previous one didn’t send me a withdrawal letter, lawyers won’t help me! Cause that one might still get my money. Seems like quite the legal issue! If only there were a professional whose career it was to help people when a crooked fucker preys on the disability cases. I’ll tell you when I figure out what the name of that profession is, but to finish up this lawyer tidbit, with a bunch of letters out I still haven’t gotten a response back. I have gotten too mentally exhausted to explain this over and over.

They got a shorter, cliffnotes rant. This one is more cathartic than anything. As well, in the very least if I die from my throat swelling up, brain swelling up, dehydration from gastrointestinal tract swelling up, or something to that effect then the likely cause is at least known to any willing to read me complain.

We are getting to the end, as only a couple more hiccups have caused me headaches. That come to memory. I call my claims handler see where my case is at. While my Dad is trying to help me (which Social Security even asked me why my Dad just can’t support me for the rest of my life. Casual and flat tone too. Pricks.) with my medical costs, giving me a place to live, ect, I don’t like burdening him. I have seen plenty of posts bout a similar plight, so I am sure you can gather.

So I pestered them. My claims handler said my claim had progressed, but she didn’t know to what point and I needed to call the main social security office in my city for more information... So I really don’t know what that person’s job description is, but she ain’ handling my case well as she implies. SO, I do just that. After waiting 45 minutes for what has my vote as the most obnoxiously repetitive hold system I have ever been put through, I get told that it is in the ‘identification phase’, that they are having trouble verifying something, and that I am not allowed to know what that thing is. I never found out, but they repeated this when i tried to ask more questions, and as I got annoyed that I was apparently not allowed to know about my own claim, I was abruptly hung up on.

The week later, I get my denial letter. Claiming that while my disorder does hinder me, I can and I quote from the letter, “We have determined that you can adjust to other work”. Eventually, I am able to get a new lawyer, who I have had for a few months. After being told that it was never in their policy to have a handwritten note sent. (Well fuck, who was phone then?!) and that they had no idea what I was talking about when I mentioned being in the ‘identification phase’ I was able to convince them to help me. They even managed, after much struggle, to get my old lawyer dropped! Sad thing is they haven’t sped matter up. Even after more photos and proof and blood tests. Even as my stomach acid rots my teeth to the point I can hardly eat anything harder than bread or a baked potato without having to fight through pain. Doesn’t stop me, because I am forced to deal with pain so I might as well agonize my way through something delicious.

I am on year three. I am still waiting. I still get little if any word from SSI or my lawyers without pestering them, and even then it is a stretch. Months tick by, and I am forced to find out that the fairy tale about the government that cares, the sect of it that is made just to help those unable to make it is nothing more than a fantasy. Next to Santa and the Easter Bunny lies Uncle Sam.

#disability #hereditary angioedema #social security #ssi #ssdi #government #USA #rant #lawyer #crooked #HAE #nonfiction

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acoolguyscoollife · 5 years

Text

Chapter 25: The Elder

Cool Guy

“So, what the hell is it?” Rose asked from besides me as Tabitha poked at Seth’s chest, where she was gently pulling out some sort of black creature with tools that I had no idea where she got them from. The tikis had brought us all together in a sort of settlement area, canopies woven from leaves and branches above us with well-worn mud floor below. All in all, it was quite homely, but not the sort of place I’d want to spend extended periods of time.

“I don’t know.” Tabitha mumbled, holding a tiny torch in the corner of her mouth to get a clear view on Seth. I wondered for a moment why none of us had offered to hold the torch, but Tabitha didn’t seem to be that bothered about it, so neither was I. “Whatever it is, I want to make sure it’s safe before I bring it back to our own world. Last thing I need is accidentally starting the end of the world.” Her long-winded sentences didn’t stop even when had something stopping her speech, which was a feat in of itself. Suddenly, she recoiled as it pulled back, almost disappearing entirely back into Seth’s body.

“Gross.” Aki said, the first thing I’d heard her say for a while. “Really… really gross.” She added, and everyone else aside from Tabitha nodded in agreement. Seth, meanwhile, seemed happy as ever.

“Hey CG, you think this alien parasite thing’s a guy?” He asked me out of nowhere, to my confusion. My expression must have made my feelings evident, as he continued. “Just like, with Aki and now Rose, the gang’s getting very female-heavy.” Explaining it at least made him coherent.

“Yeah, so? I’d only really be worried about the imbalance if we had to fight them.” I pointed out, and he gave a nod of agreement. With no one else offering any kind of small talk, we returned to silence, as I became painfully aware of the fact that our actions were being watched by the tikis that brought us here. One of them had told us to wait, before going off somewhere that they hadn’t returned from yet, so all we could really do was listen to them, especially when we didn’t have the ability to leave. Out of nowhere, Seth gasped, and Tabitha moved away quickly, worried she had hurt him.

“Your tracker thingy!” He said to her, and while I didn’t understand what they were talking about, she obviously did, cursing up a storm as she looked at her watch.

“Damn it!” Tabitha said, kicking her foot into a tree stump in anger. It didn’t budge, and the wince on her face gave away how much it hurt. “I lost it, whatever it was. I was so damn close, and I just forgot. God damn it.” Her hand was against her eyes, scrunched up against them as she massaged her eyeballs through her eyelids.

“Well hey, you did it for a good reason, right? You were worried about Seth.” Rose pointed out, and Tabitha looked as if she wanted to retort with something, but quickly decided against it. The parasite came out of his body a little bit more as Tabitha returned to her work, and I leant in close to get a better look at it. Rose moved next to me, as if to look too, but with her head a few inches behind and to the right of mine. “You look really cute in this jungle light, by the way.” She whispered to me, but it barely registered, as I focused on what was happening in front of me. It was really interesting to watch, with the parasite almost mimicking Tabitha’s movements, as she raised the metal poking device up and around, trying to lure it out further.

“Do you feel any different?” She asked Seth, who thought for a second before shrugging, throwing off Tabitha’s rhythm and causing the parasite to recoil back into him again, prompting another curse from her.

“Not really, but considering I gut-punched you without even wanting to, I’d say there’s definitely something up with it.” Seth reasoned, and Tabitha sighed in defeat, moving to the same stump she had kicked and sitting on it instead.

“Okay, a parasite that makes you angry and your clothes black, the similarities to comic book characters are starting to get ridiculous.” Amy chimed in, getting a few chuckles from the group aside from Aki, who still wasn’t up to date with our pop-culture references. I made a mental note to make a list of stuff she needed to catch up on, and to add comic books to the top of that list. Tabitha was the first to see them, looking past me and making me aware of the shuffling that was coming from behind me. The tiki that had left had returned, followed by one that had wisps of white facial hair poking out from behind his intricately-carved mask. If I had to gamble, this would be both the elder, and one of them that was probably fluent in English. With any luck, he’d be a wizened man too, giving us some useful advice.

“Hoooick!” The elder said, raising his mask before spitting mucus onto the ground. “God damn, I gotta give up the trickster’s leaf.” He pronounced God as if the only vowel it had was an a. His face wasn’t the most pleasant to look at, warted, contorted, and pretty short…ed. “So, which of you’s is the saviour?” Strangely enough, he spoke like he was from Brooklyn more than anywhere else, but considering everything else that had happened, I was kind of getting used to these anachronistic tiki-folk.

“I think that’d be me.” I raised my hand, and he looked me up and down, but mostly up. He took a few steps back, then did it again, and then repeated that once more.

“Ah, I’m seeing it now, plus the confusion with the destroyer. These guys can’t tell the difference between their gods and their enemies.” The elder seemed to speak as if he wasn’t one of them, but lengthy exposition wasn’t exactly something I was keen on. Instead, I focused on the other, more interesting part of what he said.

“Wait, their gods? What do I have to do with your gods?” I asked, stunned. I got that I was like, a bigger entity than they were, but being a god felt a little ridiculous.

“Well, they kind of worship you. Haven’t you seen the carvings from their prophets?” The elder asked me, and I shook my head.

“Ah, we called them soothsayers, but I think we found those in some weird temple thingy.” Aki called out from the edge of the group, and the elder looked over at her.

“And you didn’t tell him? Chrissakes, at least tell me you gave him the dagger.” The elder said, and Aki and Amy’s blank expressions told me everything I needed to know. Thankfully, Aki retrieved it from a back pocket, chucking it in an arc which I had to be careful with catching. The minute my hand wrapped around the handle, I felt why the dagger was so important. The tiredness that was beginning to seep into the edges of my bones faded immediately, and I felt magic working its way through me. I felt alert. More than that, I felt good. It was almost like an ecstasy high, but without the inevitable comedown. Well, unless I let go of the dagger, but I was pretty sure I wanted to always have this on my person now.

“What is it?” I said, looking at the intricate detailing that went into the carving on the blade. It was a straight dagger, almost like a trench knife in design and size, if a little bit smaller and more… blade than pokey.

“It’s the Dagger of the Saviour, but you guys would probably be better suited calling it the magic dagger or something dumb like that.” The elder had sat… well, up, on a stump now, and despite his earlier complaining, now had a smoking leaf bound tightly together, which he was raising to his mouth every so often. The temptation was there to ask for some, but right now I had more burning questions. Thankfully, he already seemed to know what I was going to ask. “It’s imbued with elemental power from this dimension, which should seep its way into you in your travels. For your home dimension, however, it won’t work for anyone who doesn’t already have latent energy from another dimension to harness. It’s more of a catalyst than an actual weapon, though it’s quite sharp.” I gave it a few cursory swings, and it definitely felt like it would do some damage. While I moved to Amy for her to do some transmutation stuff, Tabitha stepped forward to talk to the elder.

“Elder, I need your help with something. There’s some sort of black-liquid parasite that’s made its way into my friend’s body. Whatever it is, it amplified his anger and used it against him, but now seems to be dormant. Do you know anything about this?” She asked, and in turn, the elder puffed on his leaf thoughtfully.

“It sounds like one of the shadows that my people have been talking about. Another thing heralding your arrival, but this one less positive. The good news is, not long after you arrive, they’re apparently going to disappear from existence altogether.” The elder said, and I could see that it didn’t help Tabitha’s worries. She had a habit of pressing her glasses by the bit on her nose further up her face when she was stressed, and she did it then, after he had finished speaking. “If it’s any consolation, they usually amplify the host’s abilities with no logged side effects, from what I’ve been told. Plus, it should be safe to take to your own world, as they can’t survive without a host, and you don’t have enough for them to multiply.” The elder puffed again, sending out a ring of smoke into the air, punctuated by a few more.

“But he’s safe?” Tabitha asked, stressing the word safe.

“He’s safe.” The elder reassured her, and she let out a breath of relief. “In fact, I’d say he’s probably a lot more than safe right now. Any injuries he sustains, assuming they’re minor, will probably be healed.”

“We could use that for me, then we can really let loose.” Rose whispered to me coyly, and I glanced at her, meaning to respond in kind, but something came to my mind.

“Wait, soothsayers? Prophets?” I turned to the elder, who was looking over at me with almost glazed-over eyes. “What the hell is even going on with that? Do you know something about what’s going to happen to us?” The elder sighed, before finishing off his leaf and throwing it to the ground. He promptly lit a second one, and began speaking again.

“I want to stress that prophecies, while pretty damn accurate, are never 100%. Knowing the future easily changes it, and as such, what I’m about to tell you should be taken at face value.” The elder paused as if expecting one of us to say something, but I just made a hand motion for him to get on with it. “Your journey still has a long way to go, and our prophets only saw so far. You’re at the precipice of a world far greater than you’re aware of, and far greater than you’re expecting. Evil is coming, almost elegant in how pure it is, and it won’t relent. Neither should you.” He looked between all of us, none of us moving as he spoke. “You will succeed, your numbers will grow. You won’t return to this world, as you’ll soon learn that prophets exist in many more places than you’d think.” The elder took a deep puff, and I almost wanted to yell at him for how often he was stopping. “But, you will also fail. Wars will be waged. The future will be at stake. You will confront your darkest emotions…” He turned away from all of us, leaving only the smoke from his mouth visible. “And the most loyal of your group will die.”

#A Cool Guy's Cool Life #cool guy #story #original fiction #creative writing

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