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inkskinned · 8 months

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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

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thekaiserroll · 1 day

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Hug

It's nearly impossible to have a quiet and peaceful day with the crew, like the strawhats. Nami is mostly used to the noise on Going Merry but one day she gets fed up with Zoro and Sanji arguing. Not only are they extremely loud, but they've also already broken way too many things during their fights.

She decides that If they want to act like brats, then she's going to treat them as such. So she makes them apologize and hug each other in silence for an hour. None of them are happy about this punishment, but Nami threatened to raise Zoro's debt, and Sanji couldn't say no to her. It could be worse.

It's awkward enough for them to not incite any fight for a long time and Nami is quite proud of herself. She knows it won't last forever but at least now she knows how to handle them. It inevitably happens again. And again. And again.

Much to her surprise, those fights became more and more frequent. And what's even weirder is that she could see the way both Zoro and Sanji occasionally glanced at her to make sure she was nearby. It's almost as if they wanted someone to make them hug each other. As if they needed an excuse.... these idiots.

Soon, they don't even need Nami's help. When they aren't busy training, cooking or fighting, they cuddle together. Sometimes Luffy or Chopper would join them, but most of the crew knew it was their time.

After two years spent separately, they became extremely clingy. It's no surprise when they start sleeping in the same bed. What is surprising is that despite them behaving like a lovey-dovey couple, those oblivious idiots are STILL unaware of each other's feelings.

#It's almost 3 am and I'm a little tired #I really hope that what I wrote here is somewhat coherent #It's another idea that's been stuck in my head #I wanted to make a comic about this but I never have the time #so for now all I can give you are these notes and a quick sketch #and as always if there's already a fic like that please let me know I would love to check it out #sanji x zoro #sanji #roronoa zoro #zosan #one piece

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egophiliac · 2 months

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CROWLEY SSR THOUGHTS

there is zero basis for this, but I can't get this thought of my head

I don't know why I decided to draw it this way

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #(these will be relevant in a moment)#this isn't going to happen. but WHAT IF.#anyway i didn't get him (damnit birdman come home) so i had to look up his story #and let me tell you friends my findings were SHOCKING #crowley canonically likes vegetables which means that the crowley is revaan theory = BUSTED #crowley is sailor venus = CONFIRMED #(i know 'whip of love' is a saying but that's where my mind always goes)#DISCLAIMER: this is (mostly) a joke please continue to hold whatever theories and headcanons you want #but look. c'mon. look over here at this whiteboard i've covered in red yarn.#revaan being a picky eater has come up multiple times and there is an entire whole bit about how much he hated jerky and refused to eat it #and now they've made a point of talking about how crowley will eat almost anything and loOoOoves wild game meat especially #it's SO stupid but i can't help but read way too much into it #(this is tumblr if you don't want to see incredibly stupid overanalysis of anime guys then why are you HERE)#and i gotta hold on to something because otherwise whenever malleus and crowley are onscreen together i just keep going 'same hair color...#unless this is like. some kind of deep cover thing.#lilia doesn't recognize him because he saw him eat a green bean once and revaan would NEVER #crowley's secret is safe for another day #(serious hat on: i do think they're probably connected in some way)#(but there's something deeper going on that we're just not clued into yet that will hopefully explain things)#man forget revaan what if crowley whips off his mask and it turns out he was meleanor this whole time #wait hold on meleanor loves jerky. IT ALL FITS...

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leopardmuffinxo · 6 months

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😈🔪

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evelynsspace · 2 months

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okay but like,,, leaving the campfire or the dining pavillion with luke to go make out, and u both return with messy hair and covered in hickies and everyone just looks at u knowingly

I couldn't help but make it jealous!luke im sorry🙏🏻 let me know if u dont like it and ill write it again

You were just being nice,not wanting to embarrass the boy,luke just watched from afar,jaw clenched.

The boy was obviously into you,everyone can tell.

Luke noticed that this fucker(is what he decided to name him)is getting too comfortable with you,going to the point where his hand is brushing against your waist!!

And that was it.

Luke dragged you away by your hand,to a space where no one can see you.

"luke,what's wrong?you're hurting me." he wasn't even aware he was grabbing your wrist too hard,he drops it.

He pushes his lips against yours,maybe a little bit too hard.one hand in your hair,the other almost brushing against your ass.

"what's wrong baby?talk to me." You ask when he finally pulls away. you grab his face."he was flirting with you why did you let him,huh?"he replied.

"he wasn't he just wanted help and-"

"i dont give a fuck." He grabs your neck and bites on it leaving purple marks behind,your hand goes to his hair pulling on it while softly moaning.

"you're mine and mine only,y' understand?" He says,pulling away while examining his work of art on your neck.

"just yours luke,only yours." your lips reach his neck brushing against it softly before leaving soft bites,you're softer with him than he was with you.

His anger starts to fade slowly,he pulls you away from his neck and pushes his tongue in your mouth.this kiss is more passionate,the other was full of anger.

"yeah...only mine."

You both walk back to the campfire,your hair is messed up but he doesn't tell you,he wants that boy to know luke did this.he's the one that turned you into a mess and the only one that can.

When you go back he glares at the boy,the boy looks away immediately,noticing the hickies and the messed up hair,it doesn't take a genius to know what happened.

You get some looks from others but you both don't care,not when you have eachother.

#im sorry if this isnt what you wanted #also please let me know if luke is ooc or not in this #luke castellan smut #luke castellan x you #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan #writing

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laweyd · 7 months

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🌟 My supernatural horror comic "IT ALL ENDS WITH ME" is now out at ShortBox Comics Fair!!

100+pages/£10 /digita

A theatrical fairytale-inspired horror story about a maid working for a mother and a daughter at an abandoned castle.

It will be available exclusively at the (free) fair throughout October!

Please enjoy and I hope you guys wil enjoy what I've been working on the past 5 ish months!! 😭

#PLEASE ENJOY I WORKED RLY HARD ON IT 🤲🤲🤲🤲🤲🤲#laweyd #comic #horror comic #shortbox comics fair #sbcimicsfair #sb comics fair #originals #original characters #original character #please spread out the word too maybe even let me know what u guys think (🥹 if you want ;#)

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anastacialy · 1 month

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tracked down this clip just because of this post! have jokes from skizz and scar

#i spent way longer than id like to admit doing these captions. autocaptions was completely busted so i did em manually #please let me know if i missed / should change anything!#i am a person who needs captions trying to make captions for others lmfao. are the colors ok? too subtle? i wanted them legible still but #anyways sdkjhg here have this #txtly described #(bc i made the captions)#though i will probably also add a video descrip later just. not rn sorry guys #also blease if you can find the post LINK ME i have been searching the tag for ages #hermitcraft #skizzleman #goodtimeswithscar #grian #edit: thank you to the person who linked the post!! :D #second edit: yall ive been trying to swap the video out for the corrected one and it wont swap help

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hanafubukki · 6 months

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Malleus: -trying to flirt-

YN/MC/Yuu: -clearly confused-

Lilia, the wingman:

YN/MC/Yuu: Oh, why don’t we date first?

Malleus: -happy dragon noises-

#I saw this panel online and thought of malleus right always 🤣🤣#lilia wants grandkids okay?#one of these three has to give it to him #lilia would be his wingman #im not sure what manga this is from if you know it please let me know please and thank you #malleus draconia x reader #lilia vanrouge #twst mc #twst yuu #twst meme #twst memes

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blithe-bee · 2 months

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how I feel Nami would react to the comments on my recent fanart of her

#I want to take this opportunity to let you all know that your comments mean everything to me #please never change

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gabe-lovebot · 20 days

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councilor 3D model

i learnt 3d modelling from the ground up to bring him to life. he's yours now. do whatever you want with him

[link]

please credit me if you make something using the model (or even ping/link me to it, i would love to see what you made!)

currently available as a .blend, .fbx and an SFM port.

#hello councilnation i'm finally releasing him to the wild #have fun playing toys with him #ultrakill #councilor #councilor ultrakill #3d stuff #obviously with the councilor having just 1 full body image of him means that some stuff i had to improvise on #so you get to enjoy my headcanons on how he looks #(like obviously the wings & halo)#(but also the chestplate design)#but did you know that the councilor's canon design has subtle engravings on his forearm armor pieces?#i only barely noticed them when painting textures and i was floored #i had to add them #to the sfm anon and whoever else wants to use this for sfm stuff-#i did my best with a port for sfm and i'm quite proud of the result #but please be aware i have never used it before so if you find that something doesn't work as it should please please let me know!!#gonna pour my heart out in tags as always so close your eyes if you don't wanna see me being sentimental but #i'm not kidding when i say i learnt 3d modelling from the ground up for this #i have meddled with blender before but never actually came close to finishing a project #and i don't know how i did it and how i kept going #(i do know) (it was my friend encouraging me every time i showed him progress)#this was like 1 entire month in the making #but i'm so fucking proud of this and how it turned out and people's tags in my act 2 render genuinely were such a huge confidence boost #so thank you guys for liking it <3 #i'm still very much thinking of doing a version with just his bloodied head #but it might take a while because i want a break and i want to play warframe

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raplinenthusiasts · 3 months

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INSANE

#I’m so so sorry for spamming so much lately 🫣#but LOOK AT HIM #jeon jungkook #bts #btsgif #btsedit #dailybts #dailybangtan #userbangtan #usersky #annietrack #heyryen #userpat #usersolis #*mine #if you want me to stop using your track tag please let me know 😬#jjk

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sollucets · 2 months

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the ye baiyi effect

#word of honor #wen kexing #rowan gifs #userbon #tusermona #tuserashinlae #userhanyi #baek1nho #lextag #roserayne #seamayweed #tostrangers #lizlookatthis #wen 'criminal offensive sideeye' kexing #wen 'had it not been for the disapproval of my ah-xu i would've slaughtered you where you stand' kexing #(like he had a chance)#i love his face.#anyway if any taglisters want off rowan's word of honor wild ride please let me know. 😨 i am just. out here doing whatever #i still have a few more things i want to gif as well so . its not even over yet

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egophiliac · 5 months

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at this point I'm not going to finish this, but I need everyone to know that I don't CARE that it was Kamejim, this scene has been replaying itself in my brain for the past week --

#art #super sentai #kingohger #king-ohger #let them dance for real!#LET THEM DANCE FOR REEEAAAL #me at the preview: oh no i really don't want an episode about himeno romance #me after the episode: i need more exactly like this please #i have. a problem.#you know i won't say i forgot that sebastian is actually like 25 and just wearing old age makeup 24/7 #because i am incapable of ever forgetting the most incredible character trivia of all time #but i was not expecting this backstory. i can't believe they managed to improve on it.#i did however manage to forget that one nurse is named ~elegance maun~#sorry everyone else you are all great #but i do think ishibana is the best actually #then again we are headed back to toufu next episode. hmm...

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leopardmuffinxo · 7 months

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few can match me - in either magic or talent

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #rolan #bg3 rolan #my bg3 edits #rolan romance when?#userarklay #usermorvaris #userwolfkissed #userrivensbane #userlumad #userterendelev #userdekarios #miyku #baldurians #katsigian #josephseedsrosary #please let me know if you do or do not want to be tagged

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 6 months

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Wei Wuxian eats a watermelon. Yep!

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #nothing out of the ordinary here. Just good fandom fun #Watermelon discourse has been going on and I want to let people know where I stand.#This came about because I wanted to experiment with translating the (traditional) PD-MDZS style to a digital format #and while sitting there thinking of what to draw...my inspiration came to me.#This is the equivalent of sneaking vegetables into the spaghetti sauce but its important to get your gotdamn veggies #I'm not very good at organizing my thoughts (evidence: the tags of every post on this blog).#but please do not look away from this moment in history. One person cannot solve it and no one expects you to.#Even if it is just spending time doing some research on the situation and history. Or boosting posts that are more articulate #Any action helps! ANY action! Everyone has a different level of capacity for this and that's okay. Anything is fine. Dont let it be nothing #Anyhow. did I like doing this digitally? Yes but its mixed. It was faster but also spark the same joy I usually get while drawing #I will have to get over it very quickly though. You will all see why in a few days

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muffinlance · 3 months

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Wait, what’s going on with Embers???? That fic has been on my read later list since 2021, what’s happened with it???

Brief overview, then I'm likely never touching this topic again, because this is not a Drama Blog:

Context: Embers is a super old AtLA fic that was written during the early fandom days, read widely at the time, and was the origin of the widely-used fanon name of "Wani" for Zuko's ship (kind of by default that it was one of the first popular fics to give his ship a name, I think?), even though most fic writers don't seem to realize it's from there anymore.

"What's Going On": I used to include a link in all my stories to it, because I believe in crediting other writers for borrowed elements, and I was using "Wani" in all my fics. But BOY did I not want to be sending readers that way anymore, so I've adopted a new name for Zuko's ship, and removed all Embers links.

None of the criticisms about Embers itself are new; I'm assuming they date back to when the fic was being written, because this isn't an "it aged badly" thing, this is an "actually yeah this gets worse the longer you think about it and I shouldn't have ignored my bad feelings just because some of the worldbuilding was interesting" thing.

An Incomplete List of Why I Made the Change:

I don't actually like the story that much anymore, and don't want to rec it

I tried to re-read it recently to see if some things were as bad as I remembered and it turns out they were So Much Worse Oh Yikes. More specifically, the treatment of Katara and Aang and their respective cultures has... rather a lot going on. One example: The Fire Nation and Air Nomads are both given multiple backstory elements in an attempt to make the average Fire Nation soldier's participation in the genocide/war in large part the fault of the Avatar and the Air Nomads themselves, and also fully justified from the Fire Nation perspective. And I do mean fully. One of its core tenants is "People from the Fire Nation (and only people from the Fire Nation) who don't follow orders Literally Die, therefore murdering pacifists and babies and continuing the war (and their regularly scheduled war crimes) is the only thing it is physically possible for them to do". I cannot emphasize enough how literal that is.

Also the name "Wani" means "Alligator" and is... objectively a pretty lame name for Zuko's ship? Where's the personality, where's the deeper meaning, where's the resonance with Zuko's themes? @tuktukpodfics initially thought I was calling the ship "Wanyi", and that's what I've switched to, because it is Objectively So Much Better. In their words: “Wànyī (萬一): Literally ‘one in ten thousand,’ ‘perchance.’ Used grammatically in Chinese to mean ‘what if’ or ‘just in case.’ I think a ship called ‘The Perchance’ is perfect for a boy clinging to false hope.”

TL:DR; I don't rec Embers anymore, because I don't actually like the story anymore, and there are things about it that get worse the more I think on them. I've removed links to it and renamed Zuko's ship to "Wanyi" ("The Perchance") because our boy deserves a ship name that reflects his character arc.

#for the record if you ever find something kind of rancid in my fics #do please let me know #EX: I've rewritten scenes to be better Actual Blind Rep for Toph based on blind reader feedback #and I'm debating how hard it would be to ignore/re-write the canon issues of Water Tribe sexism (for the Southern Tribe at the least)#because that is a common complaint I see from the people who's RL cultures the Water Tribes was based on #probably I can do more interesting things with that going forward #in other words justice for Hama and Hahn #at least the show itself made Hama excellently complex #anyways back to doing actual writing #please no follow up questions #though I will say anyone who wants to update their own fics to use Wanyi (or any other name): go for it!#all you need to do is plop your chapters in a word editor and find/replace the ship name! it took about 40 minutes to do literally #all of my fics and I had some other editing to do besides! it'll be even quicker for you!#let's sink the Wani #avatar the last airbender #atla #Zuko

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