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#if i had to see this then so do all of you
nanaslutt · 1 day
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insatiable
ʚ synopsis: Choso accidentally discovers that you can squirt and he’s determined to make you do it over and over again
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ʚ cont: fem reader, rough sex, multiple orgasms, squirting, mating press, dirty talk, he talks you though it, inexperienced choso, unprotected sex, cumming inside
ʚ note: another brilliant ask from 🌱 anon <3
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
The position he currently has you folded in is one that has you seeing stars behind your eyes. Your legs are folded against your body while Choso drops the weight of the bottom half of his body down onto your pelvis with each thrust, making his cock assault your sweet spot deep inside you to no end. It felt like your organs had molded to make room for Choso's cock.
His hard pelvis crushed yours each time he thrust into you, his hot skin smashing against your clit, making your walls spasm and squeeze around him ruthlessly. "God, you're so tight-" Choso gritted through his teeth, his hot breath tickling your neck as he whined and groaned against your skin. Each time he bullied his cock into your walls, you felt something coil itself tighter and tighter in your stomach.
It felt deeper and more intense than your usual orgasms, but you were being fucked with such force that you were unable to utter any words, only able to squeeze your arms tightly around your boyfriend's neck and cry choppy moans as he humped into you ruthlessly. "O-oh shit-" Choso's eyes twitched and his eyebrows furrowed as your jaw fell open, mouth forming a big O shape as the ball of tightness in your pelvis burst.
Choso placed his hands on the undersides of your knees and pushed his body up, allowing him to look at the mess you were making on his cock. His eyes opened in shock, his hips not even slowing a bit as he fucked streams of a white liquid out of your cunt. The feeling of you gushing out around him made him bite his lip between his teeth, his balls throbbing as he watched you have an orgasm like you never have before.
You gasped and breathed heavily as you struggled to come down from such an intense high. You placed your hands over your face, mortified and aware of what you just did. Choso paused his hips, relishing in the feeling of your tight cunt throbbing around him in the aftershocks of your orgasm as he struggled to comprehend what just happened. You'd never cum like that before.
A bead of sweat dripped down the side of Choso's face, sliding down his bare neck. His eyes were wide as he stared at your ruined cunt, a little swollen on the outside the force of his thrusts. His abdomen and balls were coated in your cum from when you squirted all over him, the liquid dripping down onto the mattress and joining the wet mess under your bodies.
"What… what was that?" Choso asked, slightly out of breath from how rough he was going. He kept you folded in that intense position, just using your cunt to cockwarm him as he waited for you to respond. Choso stared at your cunt for a few beats longer, and when you didn't respond he dragged his eyes up your body to find your face, which was covered by your hands. "Hey," Choso spoke, releasing the hold he had on one of your thighs, letting it fall over his own as he grabbed your wrist, trying to pull your hand away from your face.
"Baby, what was that? It was so hot, can- can you do it again?" Choso asked, replaying the moment you squirted on him over and over again in your head. You dropped your hands from your face and grabbed his wrist, averting eye contact. You felt your face burn with embarrassment at the thought of explaining what squirting was to him. It wasn't his fault he had little experience in bed and had never watched porn before.
"I just came… that's all." You tried to lie, not wanting to face the mortification of the conversation. Choso cocked his head to the side and looked down between your legs again. The wet spot underneath you had grown as your liquids had seeped into the sheets, making your mess look even worse. "I've never seen you cum like that," Choso responded, a bit skeptical. He felt his cock throb inside you, he wanted to make you do that again, he needed to.
"Fuck Cho…" You cursed, your face scrunching in discomfort. Choso wrapped his arms around one of your legs and placed it over his shoulder, keeping your appendage snug against his body. His cock jolted inside you as he pressed himself deeper, making sure the two of you were as close as possible. "Then, you can do it again right?" You reached out and placed your hands on his lower hips, resting them there.
You shook your head in embarrassment, not wanting to squirt again. "Why not?" Choso asked, almost sounding like he was pouting. "Cho, I squirted, that's what that was." Even after your explanation, Choso still had no idea what that meant, but he did know that both he and his dick liked the sound of it. "That's only happened one other time… when I was touching myself. It's so messy and embarrassing." You explained.
Choso's eyebrows furrowed together, he didn't understand why you thought it was embarrassing. You sure looked like you were feeling good when it happened, so why was it so bad? And the mess? Choso was never one to care about something like that, especially in bed. He fucked sloppily and came buckets all over you every time you had sex.
There was another thought Choso was having though. He was irritated that you had squirted without him, and hadn't told him you had done or could do such an amazing thing. "Well, I think it's hot. I wanna see you do it again please." Choso said, not giving you any time to respond before he pulled his hips back and fucked half of his cock back inside you.
Your nails dug into his hips at the unexpected stimulation. The man above you started at a quick and fast pace, the same one as before. "W-wait Choso-" You tried to cry but your moans fell on deaf ears as Choso's arms wrapped tighter around your leg, keeping you sturdy and close in proximity as he abused your cunt with his cock. You threw your head back against the pillows in pleasure, already feeling something start to well up inside you again.
Choso turned his head against your leg and opened his mouth to press sloppy kisses and lickes on your skin. His eyes were shut tight, eyebrows furrowed together as he molded your pussy to shape his cock. "A-ahhh-" Choso groaned in pleasure against your leg, biting the flesh there before pulling away and cracking his eyes open, looking down at your disheveled form.
"H-how, how do I make you squirt again? Will this help?" Without warning, Choso used one of his hands to rub quick, sloppy circles against your clit with his thumb, his other fingers and palm spread out on your thigh. "God wait- Choso not there-" You gasped, shaking your head back and forth against the pillow, gritting your teeth together.
Choso's choked moans could be heard in his throat, his ragged breathing making you feel dizzy from how hot he sounded. "Y-you're getting tight again, are you gonna squirt?" Choso asked, leaning forward over your body. He placed his hand next to your head to stabilize himself as he continued fucking into you, his thumb ruthlessly rubbing back and forth against your sensitive clit.
"Choso f-fuck, c-choso-" You could do nothing but cry and whine his name as he fucked you in that deep angle again, your one leg folding over his shoulder and dangling weakly by his head, your body limp from all the pleasure he was giving you. "Please squirt again, I wanna see it, I need it." He begged, adjusting his hips against yours so his cock was drilling impossibly deeper inside you.
"Don't be embarrassed i-its, okay, I got you, please just cum." Choso's words were doing wonders on your body. The same feeling of that tight, deep ball was forming inside your pelvis, reading to be released all over Choso and his cock once more. Your eyes could barely stay open as your body took in all the pleasure your eager boyfriend was forcing on you.
"Oh god- oh god-" You winced when you felt it ready to release, you bit down hard on your teeth, your lips parted to show your strained expression, your body going rigid against him all the while Choso kept fucking into you, working you right up to your breaking point. "Yeah, y-yeah yeah-" Choso groaned along with you, fighting the urge to not blow his load before you came.
His eyes were glued to where the two of you were connected as he waited to see that liquid gush from your cunt again. His jaw fell open in a silent scream when your cunt constricted tighter than the first time and that same liquid from before squirted out from around his dick. "Goddd- yesyesyes-" Choso groaned from between his teeth, shaking his head back in forth in disbelief as you squirted all over him.
Not long after you came, Choso followed your lead. His hips stuttered and paused against your cunt, pushing his cock as deep inside you as possible as his balls throbbed and he released load after load of his cum inside you. You shook and spasmed against him, feeling your insides grow warmer as he filled you up with his seed. Your leg slipped off of his shoulder, allowing him to collapse fully against your body as the both of you shook in the aftershocks.
You wrapped your arms around Choso's neck and whined when he weakly thrust his cock in and out of you, using your cunt to milk his balls dry. You were just starting to catch your breath before you heard Choso mumble something against your neck quietly. "Huh?" You managed to force out, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion when Choso pushed himself off your body and placed his hands on either side of your body, looking down at you.
His hair was disheveled, his face all the way down to his chest bright red, and his chest heaved as he fought to catch his breath. "Again." He said, louder this time. Your eyes widened in shock, surely he couldn't be serious, your body felt like jello, you didn't know if you had anything left inside you to give. "N-need you to do that again, just one more time." You swallowed harshly, trying to mentally prepare yourself for Choso's unsatiable cock to drill you all over again.
You felt him twitch inside you, already back to life even though it felt like he had released all he could give you from his balls. You winced and whined when Choso slowly pulled his cock out before pushing it back inside you, relishing in the warmth and gumminess of your now cum soaked walls.
The mess on the bed underneath you was not twice the size, and it was about to get worse when you felt Choso's cum force itself out from around his cock and drip down your ass, joining the mess. Choso found your eyes with his and waited for you to say something as he continued slowly pushing himself in and out of you "One more time." You whispered, holding your finger up in front of you, trying to look stern, but failing. A satisfied grin spread across Choso's features. "One more time." He repeated.
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tonycries · 23 hours
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Dirty Lil’ Secrets!
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Synopsis. They all have their habits in bed - some so filthy you can’t help but keep them your dirty little secret.
Pairings. [SEPARATE] Gojo x Reader, Sukuna x Reader, Choso x Reader, Geto x Reader, Nanami x Reader, Toji x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem! reader, size differences, bréeding, mating press, oral (female receiving), vibrators, manhandling, marking, jealousy (Choso’s side), praise, degradation, exhibitionism, fíngering, semi-public, cúmplay, some HEINOUS things, pet names, swearing.
Word count. 4.8k
A/N. This came to me while watching Pink Panther, I think I should watch Pink Panther more often.
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♡ TOJI FUSHIGURO - Take it or he makes you
Now, Toji knows he’s got a big dick - huge, even. And to him it doesn’t make a difference - either you take his fat cock like the good lil’ slut you are, or he shoves it in your snug cunt and watches you gasp so deliciously around him, eyes watering, swollen lips dropping into a pretty little oh! 
“Ah- hngh daddy s’too big. I don’t think-”
“You will, pretty girl.” he chuckles darkly, leaning down till his breath is hot against your ear. “Because I’ll make it fit.”
Okay, maybe he lied - maybe it really does make a difference. Because right now, with you already so cockdrunk as he bullied his furiously leaking tip into your sloppy hole - Toji doesn’t think he’s ever been harder.
“Are- are you at least hngh- halfway in, daddy?” he hears you whimper. Cock twitching so animalistically inside you at the way your voice cracks so adorably at the end, tinged with desperation. 
Toji can’t help but huff out a laugh, brows furrowed, greedy gaze stuck on the obscene way your pretty lips struggle to take him in. Pussy spread open so shamefully for him, quivering and leaking so sinfully onto the sheets below. 
“Nope.” he hums, popping the p, reaching down to lick a long, languid stripe up the delicate tear streaming down your cheek.
God, he has to fight down some feral, animalistic part of him that wants to just plunge his throbbing cock into you till his heavy balls smack your ass. But no - not yet. What’s the fun if he can’t see you struggle a bit more?
Instead pushing in shallow, determined little thrusts to fit inside your tight pussy. Each one has his prominent veins pulsing angrily against your walls, hitting that one spot just right. A maddening bump! bump! bump! you were losing your mind to. 
Stretching you to your limits. You could almost feel his achingly hard tip hitting your cervix already.
Full. So full - and he wasn’t even halfway in. 
Feral grunts leave him at the way you moan breathlessly at each motion, scrambling to grab onto the headboard, the sheets, him - just anything to ground you to your sanity as you’re split apart on his achingly hard cock.
Ah, how he loved this little song and dance. A few tears, a few whines - his lil’ slut pretending like you couldn’t take it all - as if your walls aren’t sucking him in so obscenely, hips bucking up mindlessly for more. He loves your cute lil’ mewls when you can’t decide between wanting to run away or milk the soul out of him. 
“Now now,” Toji tuts, looping two muscled arms around your waist so you can’t escape. Tight, grip almost bruising. 
You let out a delirious squeal as he pulls you down down down - onto his thick cock. Plush walls taking him in greedily inch by fucking inch. Hungry for more.
He knew his pretty girl could do it - you always do. 
“Don’t think you can run away from me, doll.” he groans over your pathetic little yelps of “Ah! Too- too big, daddy! Gonna break-”
“Then break f’me.”
And with that, Toji’s had enough of playing nice - ramming in the rest of his length in one, harsh thrust. Not stopping till he’s buried in your dripping cunt all the way to the hilt. 
A low hiss leaves him as his abs rub your skin, twitching balls finally smacking against your ass. Finally taking all of him.
Finally bottoming out. Ah, this is what he’s wanted for s’long - teasing himself just as much as you.
“Oh! Oh my- ah, fuck. Want it- need it s’bad. Please- ngh-” you mewl, hips bucking wildly. Too cock-drunk on the way the tufts hair at his toned pelvis scratch against your throbbing clit to even form proper sentences. God, you think you could almost cum just from the feeling of being so overwhelmingly full of him.
“Feel me in you, pretty girl?” he rumbles, low and dangerous. “Feel me right…” he trails a long finger in between the valley of your breasts. Featherlight touch dancing down, down, down to your navel, pressing hard onto your stomach, “...there.” 
You gasp at the pressure, breath catching in your throat at the dangerous smirk curling his lips as he begins to pull out inch by inch - agonizingly slow. Getting ready to fucking ruin you.  Because boy does it stroke his ego to see you absolutely wrecked by his huge cock, struggling to just take him - but this is where the real fun starts.
♡ NANAMI KENTO - The family man
Nanami’s a very steady man - he always has been.
A steady job, a steady schedule, a steady relationship with you. So, really, it makes sense that he wants a kid, or two - or four with the ways he’s got you folded in half beneath him. Legs thrown over his sculpted shoulders, thighs burning at the stretch as he bends down down down-
A mating press. Nanami Kento had you in a fucking mating press.
And it was very dangerously quickly becoming his favorite thing.
You weren’t sure what to expect with that off-hand comment about wanting kids, but it surely wasn’t for your loving husband to fucking rip your skirt off and bend you over the nearest flat surface, throbbing cock now buried in your dripping pussy.
That was a few days ago.
And now every night without fail, you have Nanami’s seed dripping down your legs, still-achingly hard erection buried in your poor cunt - you doubt you’ll make it out alive this time.
“K-Kento- Hah- hngh, I feel s’full- so-”
“Shhh, darling. One more. Jus’ one more, all you gotta do is take every drop.” he hums, lips ghosting over your racing pulse. Brows furrowed, sweat trickling down his temple, cock ramming into you at such a filthy pace. 
Warm - so warm with his seed. It jolted some carnal part of him - all the way down to his achingly hard cock - to know that he was the one doing this to you. That was his cum filling your pretty pussy. And everyone else would know.
God, you can do nothing but sit there and take it as Nanami edges you closer and closer to your nth orgasm tonight. Thumb drawing rough, frenzied little circles on your throbbing clit that match the merciless pace of his hips. 
Over and over. A quick, maddening tempo he was losing his mind to.
Desperate, so desperate to get you off. 
“Gonna fill you up.” he whispers, voice raw and dripping with need, mind hazy. “Gonna be so round and pretty with my kid, right, darling?” 
You nod eagerly, as he increases his pace impossibly. Your skin stinging where his balls smack your ass, fucked-out little ah! ah! ah! leaving your kiss-bitten lips each time his hips hit yours. 
Drool drips delicately down the corner of your mouth at how animalistically he was fucking you. None of that familiar tenderness - only the pure, filthy desire to breed your pretty lil’ cunt full. All his. 
“You can dress ‘em up, and I’ll take ‘em to school.” he rambles, as half-delirious as you at this point. Drunk off of you and your cunt and you. “And when we’re all alone…” he trails off dangerously. Ripping his gaze from the creamy, white ring forming around his base to look in your eyes, “I’ll fuck another one into you.”
“Ah! Yes yes yes, please. Cum in me baby, fill me up.” 
You see white as you cum - or maybe that was Nanami painting your plushy walls with his seed, you can’t even tell at this point, too exhausted and cock-drunk. All you can feel is Nanami twitching inside you before he’s shooting thick hot spurts of his cum. Again. And again. 
“Oh- Kento, t’much. There’s so much.” you moan softly, words slurring together. Sloppy hole quivering at the feeling of being so deliciously overfilled as Nanami’s cum trickles out of you, forming a wet, sinful pool on the sheets below. 
“Feel it inside you, darling?” he doesn’t stop thrusting - rough, mindless movements from some deep-rooted, primal little part of him. Stuffing you deeper and deeper with his cum. Fully intent on filling you up until he was shooting blanks - or until he physically couldn’t. Whichever comes last.
Fucked-out little yelps leave you with wreckless abandon, mixing with the creaking of the bed at Nanami starts up yet another unforgiving pace, “Yes- Ah! I feel it, Kento. Feel it s’deep inside me.” “Mhm?” he purrs, teeth grazing your earlobe. Darkened eyes glinting with something predatory as they greedily lock onto the way his cum gushes out of you. Seeping into your skin, smearing on his abs - and his rock-hard cock. “Then, better be ready for one more, darling.”
♡ GETO SUGURU - The sweet-talker
If someone saw the ever-graceful Geto Suguru right now, they wouldn’t believe their eyes - and definitely not their ears. Such beautiful words coming out of such a beautiful mouth, but his actions were anything but. 
And it doesn’t even matter the place, he’ll come up right beside you and whisper a few seemingly harmless words. “I really love that skirt on you, angel. Is this the one I bought?” he’d say to you at the convenience store, smiling sweetly at the old woman in front of him that sighs about “young love.”
Little did anyone know that right at that moment, the innocent hand in his pocket fiddles with that little plastic remote. The one he bought specifically to make you lose your sanity.
Intensity setting 2.
“B-baby?” you whimper, breath hitching as you feel the bullet vibrator shoved inside your dripping cunt start to turn up a notch - tiny, methodical vibrations against your snug walls. 
“Yes, my angel?” 
You could almost smack the innocent grin off his devastatingly handsome face. Geto Suguru could win an Oscar for how good he was at acting like he didn’t have a firm grip on your vibrator control. Thumb running harsh, quick little circles on the intensity.
“Nothing.” you grit your teeth, nails digging into his sculpted arm as you hold onto him for support. The little bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt maddening against your cunt. Praying that no one else here could see your dazed eyes and the way your thighs were quivering desperately. God, could this queue get any longer?
You almost miss the wrinkled hand waving in front of your face, the good-natured voice in front of you asking, “You alright, dearie? You look a bit under the weather.” 
Intensity setting 3.
“I-I’m-” you choke, looking up at Geto for support. In perhaps a miraculous act of kindness, he peers down gently at the old lady. “Don’t worry, grandma. My love here has just been a bit sick today. M’taking her to the doctor after this, y’know. Isn’t that right, angel?”
Intensity setting 4.
Oh, not an act of kindness. Definitely not. 
Panties completely soaked now, pussy clenching desperately around the vibrator. You shoot a quick glare at Geto, who was urging you deceivingly lovingly to answer. God, you could almost hear the laughter inside his mind as you take a steadying breath, stuttering out a barely audible, “Y-yeah. Sick today.”
You couldn’t care less if the sigh of relief you let out is audible to everyone else in the store as the elderly woman turns away with a nod. Mind focused only on Geto and Intensity setting 4 and Geto-
“Aww, what’s wrong, angel? Why do you look like you’re about to cry?” you hear that familiar faux concern from above you. “Which asshole do I need to beat up?”
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt 
Gritting your teeth in order to not snap or just outright demand that Geto makes you cum right here, right now. Instead, managing out an unsteady little, “Turn it down.”
“What was that, angel?”
“Turn it down, I swear to-”
You’re cut off by hot breath against your ear, Geto’s voice hoarse with desire as he mutters, “Then cum. Right here.”
And as if to prove his point, he deftly runs his fingers along the intensity control once more, rubbing maddening little circles along it. Edging your climax and your sanity like the sadistic bastard he was. 
Bzzzt-bzzzt-bzzzt 
And you could tell by the faint smirk curling his lips that he was taunting you - torturing you to just break or break him. Whichever comes first.
Thighs trembling, knees weak, you shiver as you finally reach the counter, Geto’s thumb now firmly set on Intensity setting 4 as he speaks casually with the cashier. How dare he talk about the weather when you were reaching a breaking point here? 
Tears prick at your eyes - both at the pure overstimulation and the frustration of not being able to fucking cum. No matter how much you wanted to. 
“Angel, you don’t look too well. Want to sit down?”
You clench your jaw, trying to maintain some level of composure as Geto pays for your items. Every second feels like an eternity, every nerve ending screaming for release. 
You muster a weak nod even as you can feel your thighs quivering, blood roaring in your ears - you refuse to let him win. At least this time.
“C’mon now, let’s get you home and rested.” By the time Geto steers you to the exit, you’re practically begging for relief. His arm hot around your waist, your vision blurring at the edges. You’ve only made one step outside when-
Intensity setting 5.
You cum with a strangled yelp. Nails digging into Geto’s forearm hard - part in surprise and part revenge for all of that. His strong arm being the only thing grounding you - and the only thing keeping you from collapsing to the fucking ground.
Your orgasm takes you by surprise, and for a brief moment, all you can do is breathe, your eyes fluttering closed as your body shudders at the shockwaves of electricity. God, you almost think you see the pearly gates of heaven at the sheer intensity of your pleasure.
When you crack open your eyes again, you find Geto staring at you. Ah, an angel.
“Well, you should be thankful I went easy on you this time.”
Nevermind, it’s the devil incarnate.  Geto leans in closer, his lips brushing against your ear. “Hope you’re not feeling too ‘under the weather’, angel. Because I’ve got a plan in mind and we’re going to be doing something much more fun than going to the doctor."
♡ CHOSO KAMO - Marked up and all his
Choso knew you were hot - it only bothered him that everyone else did too. 
Which is probably why you’ll often find him all but dragging you into the nearest bathroom at whatever party. Barely even locking the door before he’s got you pressed against the cold counter, leaking tip dragging teasingly along your swollen folds. 
“Choso, baby~” you whine softly from where his furiously flushed head was kissing your dripping cunt, barely audible over the loud thumping of the music from the other side of the door. “More, deeper.”
And, well, whatever his sweetheart wants - she will get. Because he immediately presses in, plunging inch by fucking inch into your sloppy heaven. Veins dragging so maddeningly across your walls as he bullies his throbbing cock into your snug cunt. 
“This what you want? To be split apart on my cock, sweetheart?” He groans into the crook of your neck, your sweet moans going straight to his aching cock. Tongue flattening along the skin, licking long, languid stripes up your neck, he nibbles lightly - all part of his plan.
“Hah- Hngh, yes baby. Jus’ like that.” Enveloping himself in your warmth, thrusting in small, mindless little motions of his hips. Not even wanting to get himself off - just wanting, needing to feel your pretty pussy around his cock. To prove to himself that you were his.
But it wasn’t enough.
Mouth still relentlessly marking and biting your skin, Choso guides your legs to wrap around his toned waist - a signal to pull, to use him to your heart’s content.
“Fuck, Choso- Fucking me s’good.” Your legs tighten around him, pulling him impossibly closer. It’s all Choso ever wants. 
One hand deftly snakes it’s way down to your throbbing clit, rolling his thumb along the sensitive bud in just the way he knows will make you squeal and buck your hips onto his cock for more more more-
And the other - ah, yes, he can’t forget why he’s here - neat fingernails digging deep into your skin. Leaving pretty crescents in their wake - just below where your tight lil’ party dress hiked up. To show all those losers on the dance floor who you belong to.
Dragging. Marking. 
His mouth leaves their place from your neck to whisper against your lips, darkened eyes boring into yours, “You’re mine, y’know that?” 
You can do nothing but nod breathlessly into the heady air, hips bucking wildly underneath him as he increases his pace. Keening deliriously at the bruising grip on your hips and the even harder one on your poor cunt.
“Mine. All mine.” he grits out, twitching balls smacking your ass, rock-hard cock dipping in and out in and out in and-
“Those losers can’t fuck you the way I do, sweetheart.”
And then you’re cumming. Jolts of electricity running down your spine - and your nails raking down Choso’s. Red-hot patterns in their wake - and that’s exactly what sends him over the edge. “Ah- Shit shit shit, yes mark me till m’bloody yes-”
And maybe you do, because his throbbing cock twitches deeply in your pussy. Thrusting once, twice before he pumps thick, hot ropes into your fluttering walls. Tight balls squeezing painfully as he cums with a loud groan of your name. 
Two arms kneading your ass - wrapping bruisingly around your waist - touching any and every inch of skin he could reach. Leaving pretty little marks for days.
You can feel such a sinful, sticky mixture of his slick and your cum trailing down your legs as he fucks you both through your highs. Pooling at the cold counter, stomach now uncomfortably hot, vision blurry - yet you still manage to make out the satisfied grin on Choso’s face. 
Pure pride shining in his eyes as he takes in your fucked-out state, marks blossoming along your skin as if you’d been thrown to the wolves. 
Ah, success.
But he’s barely had time to bask in his victory till you murmur out a quick “Hold on.” Pulling him firmly by the collar of his t-shirt. Lips firmly slotting over the sensitive skin peaking out. 
Choso’s breath hitches as you bite and tease the skin - a pathetic little imitation of the absolute wreck he’d havoced on your skin - not pulling away until you’re satisfied with the dark, red mark blossoming on his milky skin. 
“There. Perfect.” you flash an almost-innocent grin at him. And despite all that transpired in this heady bathroom, this is what makes his knees weaken so desperately. Oh, how he loved being yours.
♡ RYOMEN SUKUNA - The show-off
If the King of Curses owns something nice and pretty, then you can bet he’s going to show it off to everyone and anyone that crosses him. It doesn’t matter if it’s human trash or some lowly curse he’s just about to kill, all of them have the same last sight - you.
You, sat so prettily on the hulking king’s lap. All doe-eyed and batting your lashes so innocently at him as he wielded chaos on his throne. 
It made them almost want to save you from this monster, only to realize - if Sukuna was feeling particularly generous that day - that he was the last thing that you needed saving from. 
Because if by some miracle, Sukuna was feeling generous - and decided that those scum that bow beneath him should see something pretty before they die - then they see you. Legs spread so shamefully on his lap, large arms the width of your head keeping them open for your guests.
Sukuna trails his rough fingers dangerously down your robe - one that does absolutely nothing to hide your curves or the heaving of your chest. Thin fabric tearing easily under his sharp fingernails, exposing such tantalizing flashes of skin as whoever’s watching gulps heavily in both fear and anticipation. 
He doesn’t stop till your robe is all but hanging off you now, dripping cunt soaking the tattered fabric as you keen desperately into his touch. 
“Shhh, my lil’ slut.” he murmurs, low and gravelly into your ear, hot breath sending jolts of electricity coursing through your veins. “Wouldn’t want to be rude in front of our guests, hm?”
Whoever’s bowing before you two don’t know what makes shivers run down their spine more - Sukuna’s dangerous words or the way you whine desperately. “But Sukuna~” grinding onto his very obvious erection as you do, “Wan’ you so badly, haven’t been filled by you today.”
Shit, scratch that. The scariest thing here was the deep chuckle that echoes across the throne room - the King of Curses laughing. Laughing. 
They watch in horror - unable to rip their eyes away - as he snakes down two large fingers to your dripping cunt, spreading open your swollen folds. Absolutely delighting in the way you flutter around nothing - his lil’ slut, so desperate for him. 
You buck readily into his hold as Sukuna bullies two large fingers into your snug cunt. Ready walls clenching down so sinfully at finally getting some of the friction you’d been aching for all day.
“Ohh, yes. Sukuna, finally. Wanted you in me s’bad.” you squeal as he curls his fingers deftly inside you, expertly grazing that familiar spot he knew would have you falling apart in a matter of a few seconds. 
“So spoiled.” Sukuna hums, a sly grin curling his lips - and the scum bowing before him completely forgotten - as he starts pumping his fingers in and out of your sloppy hole. Thrusting in rough, jerky little movements that no matter how filthy and unrefined they seem - hold a dangerous, calculated intent as he hits that spot over and over.
The ones before you find their cocks hardening traitorously at your breathy whines and the lewd squelching sounds. Torn between training their eyes on the ground and greedily watching your thighs quiver on the monster’s lap, cunt dripping so obscenely onto his robe. 
“Look at her.” a sharp order jolts them out of their reverie. Sukuna didn’t have to ask, he knew you were a heavenly vision in his little hell. Yet, he continues anyway, amusement spiking at the way they can do nothing but gape at what they can never have “Look. So desperate f’me. Should I make her cum?”
“Nooo, Sukuna don’ be mean~” you whine half-deliriously at the silence that follows. Voice strangled at the merciless pace Sukuna had on your cunt, rolling your swollen clit on his fingers, dipping in and out in and out in and-
Sukuna chuckles darkly in your ear, over the protests of the trash at his feet, “Seems like they don’t want you to cum.” He increases his pace ruthlessly, over and over. Hitting that spot with reckless abandon, delighting in the way you writhe and convulse on his lap. “But s’alright, I’ll be the one to make you cum. Your king, hm?”
And make you cum he does. Adding three fingers into your tight cunt now, thrusting in and out at a pace that has you bowing into his hulking body. Over and over. Hurried. Hasty. Almost torturous for those watching.
“Ah! Yes yes yes, Sukuna~ M’gonna-” you can barely finish the sentence before you’re seeing stars behind your eyes, broken moans of Sukuna’s name leaving your swollen lips. He doesn’t stop - not when your orgasm is mere tingles, your voice too raw to even let out fucked-out moans. Not even when you’re quivering and fidgeting on his laps.  Not even when he leans down to mutter in your ear, voice husky with pure need, “Now, how should I kill these fuckers off?”
♡ GOJO SATORU - Just a lil’ taste
The great Gojo Satoru loves all things sweet, and that includes you. Not just you, but your pretty lips, your sweet cunt, and the sweetest - something else he’d never admit to anyone but you - the taste of him in you.
And right now - bullying his throbbing cock into your snug cunt, his heavy balls smacking your ass over and over as he rams into you hard, fast - Gojo knows there’s something for him to look forward to. 
The bed creaks in protest as he chases the heavenly feeling of your tight pussy around him, mixing with the filthy moans leaving your mouth.
He was probably going to get another noise complaint - good, let them nosy fuckers know how good he makes you feel.
“Ah! Hah- hngh, Toru filling me up s’good.” you mewl and buck your hips underneath him for more more more- wanting, needing the feeling of him stretching you so deliciously. His glistening veins dragging along that one spot so deliciously, pulsing against your tight walls at an urgent, incessant rhythm. 
“Oh yeah?” he grunts. Cock pushing into you deeper and deeper, cervix kissing your tip so painfully good. “Like this? Like it when I fuck you like this? Can’t get enough of it, hm?”
Because of course, Gojo Satoru can’t stop running his mouth even when he’s fucking you relentlessly. Even when his thrusts grow frenzied, sloppy with desire. And especially not when you’re creaming on his achingly hard cock.
God, you’re so fucking perfect he can’t help but lose himself in the heat of the moment as well. 
Body arching off the bed, you see stars behind your eyes as Gojo cums in thick, hot spurts inside your fluttering walls. “Shit, oh Toru, s’full inside me hah-”
You think you probably cum harder just at the sight before you. 
Gojo’s head thrown back, blue eyes prettily rolling to the back of his head as he bites his lips in concentration - desperately trying to fight off that feral, animalistic part of himself that just wants to fuck his cum deeper and deeper inside your dripping cunt. Wrestling that urge to breed you full to the back of his mind. 
No, because he’s got bigger things in mind. 
Bigger things that include urgently dropping to his knees as soon as your breathless moans bate. He wrestles your hips on the mattress, grip bruising on your waist as he pulls your pretty cunt closer. All wet and painted white with his cum, dripping so obscenely onto the fresh sheets below.
Mouth dropping into a soft oh! at the sinful sight before him, Gojo doesn’t waste a second before surging forward. 
Nose-deep in your pussy, he doesn’t stop till he’s nose-deep and breathing you in so obscenely. Tongue bullying its way in between your swollen folds, dipping into your sloppy entrance in and out in and out in and out-
He groans into your cunt as he tastes himself. Tastes you. 
Sweet. 
The absolutely filthy mixture of his cum and your slick sliding down his tongue as he laps up your juices with the desperation of a madman. God, it makes the blood rush straight to his dick at the way your mouth drops open in disbelief - he never does get used to it.
Messy. It was so fucking messy. 
“Mmm, s’sweet on my tongue, baby.” he slurs, drunk off the absolutely intoxicating taste of your sin. “Fuck- Can’t get enough of it. Shit.” 
You flinch as he swears into your throbbing cunt. Seeing flashes of white behind your eyes each time he flicks his tongue just right to graze over all your most sensitive spots. You could almost cry from the overstimulation - walls fluttering sensitively around his relentless tongue.
And you probably do really cry when Gojo moves up your dripping pussy, sucking on your swollen clit. Rolling his tongue over and over at the same maddening pace of the tears down your cheeks. 
Absentmindedly, you wonder whether he’s done with his little feast - and moving on to torture you full time now.
Gojo huffs out a laugh into your cunt, popping off your abused clit with a lewd pop! Hands snaking down to grab his rock-hard base. Pulling in short, desperate little tugs to get himself ready for what was to come. “Yeah, m’done, baby.” he chuckles darkly. Shit, did you say that out loud? 
But you have no time to wonder too long about that, instead stuck on that dangerous little glint in his eyes as he stands from his position nose-deep in your cunt. Swiping his tongue across his lips, savoring every last drop of you. 
Dazed, your eyes drift from his slick-glossed mouth down, down, down to-
Oh.
“Don’t worry, baby. M’gonna be feasting again real soon.”
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A/N. Plagiarism not authorized.
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satoruxx · 2 days
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pairing: toji fushiguro x reader | 1.2k words summary: boyfriend!toji again, fluff, soft!toji, grumpy x sunshine, that obligatory sick fic, bickering, affectionate scolding, pet names, this is very self-indulgent !! rheya's note: had this written for so long and never posted it oops !! but yeah resident grump worrying over his fav what's new?
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toji knows something is off as soon as he steps into his apartment. he comes to the conclusion almost immediately, because he isn’t greeted like he normally is when he comes home.
normally, he’ll push the door open and you’ll trip over yourself as you stand from the couch, a giddy smile on your face as you jump into his arms. and being the asshole that he is, toji never hesitates to grumble about it, clicking his tongue as he says things along the lines of “dammit kid one day i won’t catch you” or “jeez baby let me get in the house” or something similar. but despite all that his hands will still be attached to you, rubbing your back as he smothers an amused chuckle against your hair.
but not today. today he’s greeted by quiet and emptiness—a clear lack of you. he had opened the door ready to catch you in his arms, but all he can do is raise a brow at the silence. as much as he normally complains about it, this absence makes his gut churn. he pushes all that aside, more concerned than anything as he drops his jacket onto the couch and heads for the bedroom.
toji is nothing if not observant, paranoid as his eyes dart from corner to corner of the small apartment. it’s ingrained into him—this fear that his past will come back to haunt him and take you away in the most brutal way imaginable. but he tries to ignore that, continuing to head down the hall until he pushes the bedroom door open.
his shoulders drop in relief, seeing you laying on your stomach, face buried in the pillows, and he lets out a sigh. he sees you shift a little, signaling that you’re awake, so he takes a few steps forward.
toji climbs onto the bed and lays down next to you, dropping a heavy arm over your back. “what’s wrong?”
“don’t feel good,” you answer back. toji’s brows furrow, and he manages to push his free palm against your forehead. heat pulses against his skin, and his frown deepens.
“the fuck did you do to yourself?” he asks, not unkindly but still stern—you can only glare at him hazily.
“it’s not my fault!”
“uh huh,” toji rolls his eyes, threading his fingers through your sweaty hair and pushing it back from your forehead. “so me telling you to put some layers on when you go out in the cold has nothing to do with this?”
you huff, face heating under his pointed stare, and all you can do is shove his hand away, before pathetically burying your face into the sheets again. “shut up.”
“don’t be a brat.” toji lets out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head indulgently. “it’s your fault for not listening to me.”
“if you’re just gonna lecture me, go away,” you complain, cheek pressed into the pillow. toji snorts, though his hand rubs what you assume to be soothing circles on your back.
“who’s gonna make sure your dumbass doesn’t get into more trouble?”
another indignant huff, and toji only chuckles. “alright c’mon kid. let’s get you in better shape, yeah?” he grunts, looping his arm around your waist and tugging you up. you immediately protest, whining out a plethora of curses attached to his name, and he rolls his eyes. “okay, alright shut up.”
he maneuvers your body into sitting position, leaning you up against the pillows and pulling the blankets up with furrowed brows—meticulous in a way that he is only with very few things.
“you eat anything today?” he asks, still fussing over the blankets, and you gulp quietly. one look and toji’s frown grows deeper. “kid.” the word comes out stressed, like a scolding, and you wince.
“i didn’t feel like it,” you groan, trying not to wilt under his pointed glare.
“don’t care,” he huffs. “your body needs energy, stupid.”
“rude,” you mutter, crossing your arms and toji rolls his eyes.
“whine all you want—“ he stands up, rolling his neck until he hears a satisfying crack. “—still gonna make you eat something. soup okay?”
you don’t want to admit how tempting it sounds, so with an unrelenting amount of stubbornness you glare at him. “fine.”
his lips quirk upward into a smug little grin, and you try to refrain from throwing something at him. he pats your leg. “alright.”
he heads into the kitchen, leaving you to your thoughts. you hear the occasional sounds of cooking and utensils and before long, the comforting smell of soup wafts through the apartment. you try not to show toji how your mouth is watering when he walks back in, a bowl in his palm.
“here,” he grunts, propping a knee onto the bed that dips under his weight. “eat up, doll.”
you sigh, already hating the feeling of the cool sheets when you move even slightly to reach for it.
“you gonna make me spoon feed you?” toji’s brow quirks—smug, and obviously amused.
“i can do it myself thank you—” you try to take the bowl from him with a glare but he raises it out of your reach and clicks his tongue.
“will y’just let me do this one thing for you, jeez,” he complains, glaring down his nose at you.
you cross your arms with a huff, tone going slightly apologetic. “i feel bad—”
“why the fuck do you feel bad?” he asks sharply, eyes narrowed and confused and caught off guard like you’ve said the most out of pocket thing.
“because—” you stress, throwing your hands up miserably. “you were out on these crazy missions—probably tired as hell. and instead of relaxing you have to come home and take care of me because i was too stupid to look after myself.”
toji groans, putting the bowl on the bedside table before sitting on the bed completely. “kid,” he says emphatically, taking your face in his palms firmly. “how many times do i need to tell you this? i don’t mind lookin’ out for you.”
“yeah but—”
“no shut up,” he snaps, an exasperated sigh escaping his lips. “you always worry about bothering me or inconveniencing me or some other crap like that. i’m telling you—don’t.”
his thumbs gently press into the apples of your cheeks, and your lips part under his pointed gaze.
“i like doin’ shit for you, okay? ‘n takin’ care of you when you’re sick? that’s nothing.” his lips tug into a lopsided smirk. “who else is gonna look out for you anyway?”
you purse your lips, throat going tight because toji rarely talks like this—so honestly open. and though you’re sure that many people out there would say he’s harsh and mean and not good for you, it’s things like this that prove how wrong they are.
“what’s wrong? did i break your brain?” toji asks, reaching up to knock his knuckle against your head, and you huff out a laugh, pushing his arm away.
“shut up,” you mutter, falling into his chest heavily. he chuckles, low and throaty as he pats your back.
“you up for eating now?” you can feel him reaching for the bowl, and you smile against him, pressing your face further into his warmth because toji will always be nothing but safe for you.
“in a minute,” you answer, looping your arms around his waist. he sighs, shaking his head but he doesn’t say anything else.
but you think you can feel him smile against your hair as he drops a chaste kiss to your forehead—you don’t tell him that though.
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sansaorgana · 2 days
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— THROWN TO THE WOLVES (VIII)
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PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE PART FOUR || PART FIVE || PART SIX PART SEVEN
PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC
SUMMARY — Giedi Prime celebrates Feyd-Rautha's birthday and the hundredth kill in the arena. Meanwhile, na-baroness gets reminded by The Baron who pulls the strings and finds out unpleasant truth about the promise her aunt has given to the Bene Gesserit.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreides’ half-sister. I wasn't sure what titles Feyd's children would have but since his brother is a Count, I assumed his children would be C(o)unts and C(o)untesses. I mean, his eldest son would become na-baron but only after his father would become The Baron, I assume 🤔 Next chapter we go to Arrakis, babes!!! 🤭 Thank you for all your comments, reblogs and messages! 💕
WARNINGS — arranged marriage, mentions of sexual activities (no actual smut), violent behaviour, death, syringes, mentions of planned and scientifical breeding, blood pact
WORD COUNT — 6,670
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
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THROWN TO THE WOLVES (VIII)
You were laying on an examination table and staring at the black ceiling above you while the medic was busy with noting down some things and injecting you with vitamins, minerals and proteins. It was the day of Feyd-Rautha’s hundredth kill and his birthday but you hadn’t spent much time with him the past few days since he was restraining himself physically before the fight.
You still shared one bed with him, though. He wasn’t avoiding you as much as he had been the last time.
“How do you feel, na-baroness?” The medic asked and you smirked at him.
“Like you care about it,” you pointed out. “We both know you only care about the child.”
“I care about what I am being told to care about, my Lady. I follow orders,” he explained. “I asked na-baron the other day whether I should do everything to keep you in the best state possible or focus strictly on the child, na-baroness. He wanted me to ensure you would be alright,” he added and you tried your best not to show how surprised you were.
“He really said that?” You only asked.
“Well…” the medic looked down and laughed nervously, “he said that you might still be useful later, my Lady. Forgive my words.”
“The words are not yours, therefore you do not have to apologise for them,” you assured him. “Anyway, if I ordered for you to be killed, who would make sure I am alright?” You teased with a smile and he sighed with relief.
“So, how do you feel, na-baroness?” He repeated the previous question.
“I feel… different,” you told him. “I have these cravings…”
“Cravings are perfectly normal during pregnancy, my Lady,” he nodded his head.
“Yes, I understand. But recently I want to eat the same food as my husband although I still find it quite disgusting but… I still crave it. Feyd says it’s the child being whimsy but he is no medic…”
“It will pass,” the medic looked up at you and assured you. “The cravings will pass, my lady, after the pregnancy. Your husband is right about the child.”
“Other than that, except for feeling a little emotional at times, I do not experience any side effects of pregnancy. I don’t even feel sick in the mornings,” you told him.
“Yes, because I am trying my best to make this process go as smoothly as possible for you, my Lady,” he smiled and noted something down again.
“But…” you furrowed your brows, remembering something that had been worrying you lately. He looked up at you. “You see, during the celebration, I talked to my previous maids, perhaps you remember them. And they are pregnant, too. One of them told me the Harkonnen pregnancies are different and she warned me.”
The medic sighed and leaned back in the chair as he hesitated for a while whether he should explain this whole situation to you or not.
“There is no such thing as Harkonnen pregnancy, my Lady. We are humans just like you are,” he reminded you. “It’s the centuries of living on this heavily polluted planet that made us look the way we do and mutated some of our DNA but we are not of different species.”
“I understand,” you nodded. “Forgive me, I did not want to insult your culture.”
“Na-baroness does not have to apologise,” he bowed his head down slightly. “You see, our women are not very fertile because of the atmosphere on this planet. That is why our… medicine… has progressed so much. We needed to find an artificial way of ensuring population growth. The Harkonnen women – even boosted with injections – usually weaken a lot during pregnancies. But their bodies do not change much. When it comes to off-world women…” He hesitated once again and you sat up, listening very carefully. “Let’s say, your body treats your son as a foreign element. He is half Harkonnen – with the best genetic material from his father, of course – but your… clean and healthy body treats him as something polluted and poisonous. And what happens, my Lady, when you spill a drop of poison into someone’s drink?” He asked you.
“Diffusion,” you gasped and he nodded. Your heart skipped a beat. “So, the child is poisoning me?” You swallowed thickly as you asked. You could feel all your limbs go weak at the thought.
“No, na-baroness, not with me around,” he chuckled and shook his head. “But your former maids do not have such medical innovations, I’m afraid.”
“Will they die then?” You asked.
“No, they will not die. And their bodies might go back to normal some time after the pregnancy, once the blood gets rid of all the… toxins,” he added. “Forgive me, I did not mean to scare you, my Lady. And it brings me no pleasure to admit how truly poisoned our people are. It feels humiliating in a way.”
“So I have nothing to worry about?” You stood up and watched him carefully. He was visibly hiding something from you.
“Na-baroness doesn’t have to worry about the child taking away her strength, no,” he only said.
“What should I worry about then?” You raised your eyebrow at him, demanding an answer. You could see him panicking a little. He was the Baron’s loyal servant but you were being pushy and he was aware of the power you had recently gained. He couldn’t just lie to you so easily nowadays.
“I think you have been thinking of it, too, my Lady, of that possibility,” he whispered and you furrowed your brows. “Your mother, she… She died in childbirth, did she not? And everyone keeps saying how much you look like her, my Lady.”
“My mother did not die because she was weak in flesh,” you explained to him although you became nervous when he mentioned that. “She died because she was weak in mind. She couldn’t bear to live with my father in a loveless union. It killed her that on the day I was born he was with his pregnant lover. She died of sadness,” you informed him and he widened his eyes a little at that. You were aware that your explanation was not exactly very medically accurate.
“I can only say that I will try my best for the same thing not happening to you, na-baroness,” he stood up as well and bowed down, making you feel stupid for your outburst. Of course he was right. Your mother had died because she had lost too much blood.
She had died because of you.
Because of a child with a man she hadn’t loved. Because of a child she probably hadn’t even wanted in the first place.
Your whole life you had been imagining your life with her. How much she would love and cherish you. But what if she would not? Now, more than ever, pregnant with Feyd-Rautha’s son, you understood what your mother had gone through. She had been forced to give birth to you and she had paid the biggest price for it.
“I… I should leave now and prepare for the event,” you told the medic and he nodded at you and watched you walk out of the room.
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You walked through the dark corridor being led by the guards. You had been there before, a few days after your wedding, being taken to Feyd-Rautha preparing for his fight, scared of his reaction to see you disobeying him with the choice of your dress. These past few months, lots of things had changed. You walked confidently now with your head held high and waited for the guard to open the big, black doors in front of you.
You walked inside the room and spotted your husband in the middle of it, surrounded by the servants putting black paint stripes on his bare chest. One of the male servants was presenting the knives on a black, velvet cushion.
They all turned around to see you approaching them and you purposefully took your time while walking gracefully in a dress that was supposed to be one of his birthday presents. It was a mix of black latex – one of your new favourite fabrics – and black silk. Delicacy and vulgarity mixed together, wrapped around your curves and revealing just enough to let the imagination run free but not enough to actually reveal anything that belonged to Feyd-Rautha only. Your hair was loose but you wore a beautiful black diadem that had been a gift from one of the lords, given to you during the celebration feast thrown in your honour.
“Well, well, well,” Feyd’s eyes squinted at the sight of you as you stood right in front of him. You hadn’t seen him at all this morning because he had woken up very early to prepare. “I was just about to check the blade,” he pointed at one of the knives on the cushion. You saw terror in the eyes of the servants standing behind him.
Feyd reached out for the knife and balanced it a little in his hand before facing you and opening his mouth to show off his long tongue and licking the tip of the blade. You nearly gasped at the vulgarity of this act that made you ache in your core after a few days of not being touched by him at all. In your head, you imagined him dropping to his knees and burying his face right between your legs. It was making you feel dizzy to think of that and the tension between you two seemed to be under voltage.
But when you spotted his wrist tilting a bit, you already knew what would happen now.
“Tsk, tsk,” you hissed at him and he froze, confusedly looking at you. “It’s time to grow up, don’t you think?” You asked, teasingly. “Only spoiled little boys discard their toys so easily.”
You liked his bloodthirst and found it more than useful but you didn’t like to watch innocent slaves being killed for fun. You knew that it was not the custom of all Harkonnens to do that. A common lord would not kill so easily mostly because it would cost him money to get another slave. But Feyd couldn’t care less about the material aspect of it.
“Also, I do not understand why you decide to restrain yourself from fucking me but you can’t restrain yourself from killing before the actual fight in the arena. It makes no sense to me,” you added. “You need to be as railed up as possible.”
After a short while he lowered his hand and put the knife back on the cushion as the servants behind him sighed with relief.
“It’s not balanced properly,” he told the male servant. “Bring me another one, you useless sack of meat,” he ordered and the nervous man bowed down before hurrying out of the room.
“Good boy,” you praised Feyd, proud of yourself.
It was one thing to make him kill for you but it was another to stop him from killing.
“You want to weaken me,” he drawled through the gritted teeth. He was already railed up to the maximum and it was delicious to see him in such a state.
“Me?” You asked, playfully. “Far from that,” you explained. “I want you to be a rabid dog today, do you understand me?” You took a step forward to grab his crotch as your face remained inches away from his. The servants behind him widened their eyes and you felt a shiver going down his starved body. “Today is very important, my pet,” you whispered. “Do not disappoint me,” your hand squeezed him and let go as fast as you felt him hardening under your palm.
Feyd smirked at you.
“Rabid dog,” he only nodded, “for my Baroness,” he added and you felt a wave of pleasure crawling all the way through your skin.
You leaned in to cup his cheeks and place a kiss upon his forehead.
“Accept my blessing,” you breathed out, “and happy birthday, my darling”.
You took a step back and smiled faintly at him before bowing down slightly –  pure act of mockery after showing your unquestionable dominance – and walking away to leave the room to let him continue his preparations.
“I will make you proud,” you heard his voice when the guards opened the doors in front of you. To that, you gave no answer as you left the chamber and placed both of your hands protectively on your abdomen.
The truth was, he had no idea how important that fight could be for the both of you. Baron Harkonnen hadn’t spoken to you a lot the past few days and you had no idea if he had decided to listen to your advice or not. For a while you wanted to warn Feyd about such a possibility but you knew that it would only take away satisfaction and pleasure from him. And it was his birthday. He deserved his gift.
That is, if The Baron had listened to you.
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After being announced, you waved at the Giedi Prime citizens gathered in the arena as they cheered loudly at the sight of you. You gave them a wide but dignified smile before sitting on the chair next to the Baron’s and taking your binoculars from his servant.
“You will be pleased,” Baron told you as he watched you from the corner of his eye and puffed on his pipe.
“There are a lot of ways to please me, my Lord. Care to specify?” You teased and you swore, one of his eyes twitched at that.
“He will be given three Atreides soldiers that we kept imprisoned after taking over Arrakis. You might even recognise them,” Baron explained.
“I doubt,” you winced. “I never paid attention to soldiers,” you explained. “Not as individuals, I mean.”
“Well, you better pay attention to one of them now because he is not drugged,” Baron informed you and your heart skipped a beat at the revelation.
It made you both excited and terrified. You couldn’t show any of this to the Baron so you just nodded your head at him.
“If my nephew dies today, it will be on you,” he chuckled.
“It has no significance to you, does it? Your next heir is already in the making,” you pointed out sternly and caressed your womb. You dropped your formalities with him nearly at all because you felt that you no longer had to address him as my Lord. Not only you had advanced in his eyes in the ladder of his enemies but you also held the title of Duchess Atreides.
Oh, you had just realised. You really were Duchess Atreides now. And you would watch your husband murdering your own soldiers. That was dark, you had to admit. Baron still had his spirit.
“If my nephew turns out to be so weak to be killed today by a mid Atreides soldier, I am sure his son will be no better,” Baron’s voice got serious again and it caused a chill to go down your spine.
Well, you were trapped. Feyd had to win, otherwise you and your son would die, too. How stupid you had been to think that the Baron wouldn’t twist the game for his own gain.
“We will have to find a way to plant a better seed in your cunning womb then, my Baroness,” his eyes sparkled at you and then he brought the binoculars to his face and watched the arena.
You turned your head around to hide the way your body gagged at his words. You’d rather him to kill you than find a way to implant his spawn inside your womb, even if it would not even require touching him.
You took a deep breath in and watched Feyd entering the arena through your binoculars as the crowd cheered. What had you done…? Had you outplayed yourself? Would it be your end?
Your shaking hand squeezed your womb as if you wanted to comfort your son although he was too small to be stressed about it.
It’s going to be alright, you kept thinking, pretending you were talking to your child. Your father’s going to win it, my little one, don’t you worry.
You were so lost in the thoughts of stress and anxiety that your senses got numbed for a while and you came back to reality only when the whole arena was filled with a loud cheer as Feyd’s first opponent was killed.
You sighed with relief as he had only two to go now. You focused on the man who was not drugged and you realised that you indeed recognised him. He was an excellent warrior and it made you feel uneasy.
You tried not to look at the Baron at all but you could feel his eyes on you. And not only his.
You looked up through your binoculars and saw that on the balcony in front of you, the Bene Gesserit sisters were sitting together. Not only the local one but lots of them – hiding in the shadows behind their veils. Watching you.
You wondered if one of them was your aunt. Probably.
“Don’t you just hate them?” You fought your disgust and fear as you spoke up.
“Hm?” Baron asked.
“The Bene Gesserit,” you explained. “Their schemes and plans, they interfere with yours a lot, don’t they? Don’t you hate how much power they hold even over you?”
“Well, what would you propose to do with them? I can’t just throw them out,” he laughed at you.
“Why not? If I was The Baroness, I’d limit their influence in the Harkonnen systems,” you told him and he brought the binoculars down as the crowd cheered when Feyd dealt with another drugged warrior.
“Then perhaps you are not ready to become her yet,” Baron squinted his eyes at you.
“Why is that?” You brought your binoculars down as well and dared to turn your head around to face him as if you were accepting a challenge.
“You cannot reject customs so old and so common throughout the galaxy if you want to be a respectable House and not an outsider. I thought you’d know that, it’s basic knowledge,” he explained.
“I thought The Harkonnens were richer than the Emperor himself and with an army much bigger than his. Houses of such influence don’t have to care about the rules. They make them. I thought you’d know that, it’s basic knowledge,” you drawled.
If Feyd would win this fight, you would remain untouchable. If he would die, your life would be hell anyway. You had nothing to lose. You could speak to The Baron however you wished. At least your anger was telling you this and it was very tempting to listen to it.
But The Baron only chuckled at you.
“I like your fierceness. It is obvious you hold lots of hatred towards the Bene Gesserit but you cannot let your personal judgement overshadow the real situation. They can be useful,” he told you.
“I guess they can be,” you shrugged your arms and brought the binoculars back to your face.
“If it wasn’t for them, your dead body would rot in the Arrakis’ desert now,” Baron reminded you and you swallowed thickly.
You had other things to worry about now. Feyd was left alone with the undrugged Atreides warrior and he was struggling to win that one. You clutched on the edge of your chair with one of your hands as you watched him being nearly killed over and over. He was fighting back excellently but his opponent was more equal to him and his skills than you’d like him to be. You could see on the people’s faces that they all held their breaths.
But none of their lives were in as much danger as yours in the case of your husband’s death.
Your anxiety turned your hands cold and formed a gulp in your throat that was making you feel nauseous as you watched Feyd getting rid of all his cheating devices that were supposed to make him safe. He was full of adrenaline and wanted to show off – to make you proud. But he had no idea how much it all could ruin your life in the process.
“What is he doing?” Even Baron’s servant was shocked.
“Showing his worth,” Baron chuckled.
You wanted to scream at The Baron to make it stop and it was physically hurting you that you had to restrain yourself from doing so. You couldn’t show weakness but not only were you worried about yourself and your child but you had also just realised you were worried about your husband’s life.
It was an odd discovery but when you thought that you’d never be able to hear him call you pet or have him fuck you, you would miss it dearly. If you’d never be able to cup his angry face and watch it relax at your sweet cooing, you would be very upset.
It was pure torture to watch him fight now and struggle with the Atreides soldier. There was no way the Baron didn’t see the way your legs and arms were shaking. But it probably brought him nothing but pleasure.
When Feyd definitely killed the brave opponent and was announced a winner as he screamed in victory and raised his blade, you still couldn’t believe that it was happening for real. You needed a moment to go back to reality and when the cheers of Giedi Prime citizens reached your ears, you stood up abruptly. The people cheered even louder now at the sight of you and you approached the railing to look down at your husband.
You were aware that all binoculars at the moment were pointed at you so you tried not to show a hint of fear and nothing but pride. In Feyd’s eyes you spotted a sparkle at the sight of your satisfaction with his performance.
You turned around and passed the chuckling Baron without the word to reach the elevator as your guard followed you without a word. You wanted to be with your husband now.
It seemed like forever until the elevator was finally down and you hurried out of it to run through the dark corridor to reach the doors to Feyd’s chamber. On your way you spotted the Harkonnen servants dragging dead bodies of his opponents but you didn’t even flinch.
“Stay outside,” you ordered the guard and he nodded before you pushed the doors open and entered the room.
Feyd was standing there shirtless and smirking proudly at himself as the medic was tending his fresh wounds with some sort of liquid. You approached them and the medic bowed down at you as he moved out of your way.
You cupped your husband’s face and brought it down to press his forehead to yours. He was a bit taken aback by the aggressiveness of your moves.
“You did it, Feyd. You did it,” you felt tears streaming down your face and he furrowed his brows at your reaction. He grabbed your wrists and pushed you away slightly.
“You knew,” he only said and clenched his jaw. “You knew about that man not being drugged, did you not?” His pupils darkened. “What game are you playing? Trying to get rid of me with my uncle, huh? You want to be his little Baroness instead?”
“My Lord…” The medic tried to interfere seeing the way your husband was twisting your wrists to cause you pain. But Feyd only gave him a deadly glare.
Sometimes rabid dogs would bite their owners, too. You weren’t scared of him, though. He was confused and jealous.
“My darling, not only I knew but it was also my idea,” you told him and he froze to take a better look at your face. You smiled at him. “And now everyone on Giedi Prime respects you for the warrior you are. I have seen you train many times before, I thought the way your uncle gives you drugged warriors is humiliating to you,” you explained softly. “I couldn’t tell you before because it would spoil your fun. Happy birthday, Feyd,” you added.
He softened in an instant and let go of your wrists only to grab them again and bring them to his lips and shower them with hungry and sloppy kisses that would later leave the red marks. His kisses were never soft or gentle, you suspected he wouldn’t know how to kiss like that.
“Leave us,” you whispered almost inaudibly to the medic and he bowed down before walking outside the room.
When Feyd finished soothing your wrists, he pulled you closer to him and you placed a kiss on his forehead.
“You made me proud,” you told him and picked up the bowl of liquid the medic had left behind as you began to tend your husband’s wounds yourself. He shivered when your fingertip touched him gently for the first time and you shushed him quietly. “When you killed your harpies, your uncle caught me in an empty room and told me that the other lords call you weak now. I told him to give you a real warrior so the lords stop their whispers. But my real agenda was to show the nobility of Giedi Prime that you are a worthy successor,” you shared the details of your plan with him.
“What do you mean he caught you in an empty room?” Feyd’s jaw clenched.
“That is not important now, my pet,” you shook your head with a chuckle. Your fingers worked delicately and slowly on his smooth skin. You doubted anyone had ever touched him this way before.
“One victory like this is not enough,” he pointed out.
“I know. But now it’s going to be easier. We still have to be patient, though,” you looked up to meet his gaze. “Here, it’s done,” you announced and put the bowl away.
“You should leave before I ravage you,” he looked you up and down with so much hunger in his eyes that you felt as if you were already naked in front of him.
“You think I don’t feel the same after all these days of not feeling you?” You laughed at him. “Do it,” you dared him and his eyes widened. “I trust you won’t hurt me despite your starvation,” you teased.
Some part of you really trusted him. Perhaps because he was the only person in the world you could trust amongst the Harkonnens and you desperately wanted an ally.
Your plan would only work out if you had Feyd by your side.
“Later,” he shook his head, surprising you with the level of his self-discipline. “I can wait a few more hours but I will not risk the safety of my heir,” he explained.
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The birthday celebrations started but Feyd was not very excited about them. He had been way more interested in the celebration thrown for you and your son than about his own. He seemed to be bored and all the gifts presented to him were making him nod his head without any enthusiasm whatsoever. Birthdays were not celebrated as officially as other holidays on Giedi Prime so you were able to roam freely around the room and talk to people while he was doing his own thing. However, you were growing tired and exhausted. It was evening already and all the stress you had experienced earlier wore you out. 
You felt Feyd’s hands on your shoulders and you turned around to face him with a smile.
“I’m bored here,” he told you.
“It’s your birthday, you should be celebrating,” you caressed his cheek.
“I’d rather celebrate with you upstairs,” he smirked and you nodded softly. “I’ll go talk to my uncle now as he wishes to see me and you go to the bedroom and wait there for me,” he ordered and you leaned in to peck his lips. 
“Don’t take too long, I have more gifts for you,” you told him and his eyes sparkled as he nodded his head and walked away to go to his uncle.
You excused yourself using your fragile state and you left the dining room to go upstairs. Once again you were not guarded but this time you decided not to wander around the yet unexplored rooms and go straight to yours.
When you were about to reach the staircase, you heard someone else’s footsteps behind you. They weren’t as heavy as the usual steps of the Harkonnen guards or lords but they still made your heart sink in your chest. You turned around and spotted the local Bene Gesserit woman standing a few steps behind you. You wanted to sigh with relief but you were not stupid to think that her presence meant you were safe. Quite the opposite.
“What do you want?” You asked her.
“To talk,” she approached you and took her veil off. You were surprised to see that she was a regular woman like you were. You had never been able to spot that from behind the veil covering her face.
“Talk about what?” You gritted your teeth and she reached her hand out towards your womb. You hissed at her and grabbed her wrist to stop her.
“I mean no harm,” she assured you and pressed her hand to your abdomen for a while. Then she hummed to herself and took the hand away. “Impressive. Your aunt barely managed to convince the sisters to allow this union because your genes were not as strong as they wanted Feyd-Rautha’s children to have. However, I see that the Harkonnen medicine is progressing greatly,” she pointed out. “They brought the best out of you.”
“I don’t like the way you speak of me,” you snapped. “You don’t address me properly and you dare to insinuate my genes are not good enough to bear my husband’s offspring.”
Bene Gesserit smirked at you. She didn’t seem to care about your little outburst at all.
“However, it’s a boy,” she continued. “I mean, of course it is. I didn’t expect the Harkonnens to want anything else,” she added. “Your next one shall be a girl.”
“Excuse me?” You took a step back and clenched your jaw. “What I have next is my business. Mine and my husband’s, that is,” you placed your hand on your womb protectively.
“If you don’t give Feyd-Rautha a daughter, my Lady,” she emphasised ironically and you raised an eyebrow at her, “then I will.”
You nearly gasped at her insolence. Rage filled your whole body hearing her words. She threatened to lay with your husband? While she was inside your home?
“If you bewitch my husband, I will have you killed. I do not care about any of you,” you threatened her back.
“Your aunt promised us that you would be easy to control. As we both know, that is not true but we can let that slip. However, we will not give up on the promised daughter,” she explained calmly.
“Wh-what?” You stuttered out.
“Your aunt promised us that your first born daughter will be trained to become Bene Gesserit,” the woman answered and you felt a stinging pain in your chest.
Your aunt… whom you had never even met in your life. Of whom you had had no idea for most of your life. Yet she seemed to be the mastermind behind it all because of your grandfather’s sick ambitions to put his granddaughter on the Harkonnen throne. And your father… He passively had allowed that all to happen as Lady Jessica had cheered. 
“Is she here?” You barked at her. “My aunt? I want to talk to her.”
“The other sisters have left already, I’m afraid, na-baroness,” the woman told you. 
“If I have a daughter one day, I will not give her away to you witches,” you pointed your finger at her.
“There will be no need. She will stay here and I will train her,” she explained. “The Harkonnen countess would not be treated like a regular sister. Of course such powerful members have their privileges.”
“I still don’t want you near any of my children,” you told her angrily. “And I want you to stay away from Feyd.”
“You’re scared,” she smirked as she approached you, “because you know my poison is more effective than yours. I could really bind him to me in a way that is not accessible to you. You don’t hate us for witchcraft. You hate us because you’re not one of us,” she dared to whisper to you.
“I prefer holding less power but not being a blind follower of any idea nor force but myself and my own desires,” you answered proudly and straightened yourself.
You will obey me.
The loud and overwhelming voice boomed inside your head. You knew that voice very well. You had been growing up with it around.
“I will obey you,” you nodded and turned around to walk away but after a while you managed to fight this staggering sensation numbing your brain. “I will not,” you said.
“What did you say?” Bene Gesserit asked, surprised. You turned around to face her once again.
“I will not,” you repeated.
“How did you do that?” Her eyes widened.
“Growing up around Lady Jessica… You think I didn’t learn how to disobey your cursed voice?” You asked her with contempt. She didn’t have to know how much it costed you each time to be able to do that. You wanted her to think it was easy.
“That is impossible,” the woman shook her head. “You could not learn that by yourself.”
“Yet I did,” you shrugged your arms. “And no offence, but Lady Jessica was more powerful Bene Gesserit than you are.”
“Yes, she was,” she nodded. “That is why she was able to teach you this.”
“Teach me this?” You raised your eyebrow.
“Of course. Do you think you were able to master this ancient ability to fight The Voice by yourself? She had to teach you this. I only wonder why,” she hummed to herself.
Now you wondered, too. Perhaps some part of her wanted to protect you from whatever would come in the future. Perhaps some part of her cared about you.
And you hated to be grateful to her for anything but now you were.
“I might give you a daughter next,” you told the woman in front of you. “Having a powerful Bene Gesserit as my daughter can be useful,” you remembered Baron’s words. “But if you try to pit her against me or send her away to procreate with some gross lord far away from here, that is when I will intervene and you will regret this, witch,” you warned her.
She nodded.
“And if you touch my husband…”
“With all respect, I’d rather not touch him if I don’t have to, so just give us a daughter next,” she chuckled nervously.
You smiled at her. At first you were surprised hearing her words but then you remembered that most people did not see Feyd the way you were seeing him now. To them he was scary, unhinged and temperamental and his presence was deeply unsettling.
You left her in the corridor and went upstairs to your bedroom. You regretted not seeing your aunt because there were lots of things you’d love to tell her.
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Feyd joined you in the bedroom not long after. You were dressed in a nightgown already and sitting on the chair pulled away from his desk.
“What took you so long?” You asked him when the doors closed behind him.
“He gave Arrakis to me,” your husband informed you and stood above you as your eyes sparkled.
“What? He did?”
“Apparently Rabban is humiliating himself over and over there and embarrassing our family,” Feyd gritted his teeth. “I will be named the new Governor soon.”
“Well, that’s a gift I cannot possibly beat,” you teased and beckoned him over as he fell to his knees to be able to face you.
Feyd put his hands on your thighs as he opened them with his long fingers and you chuckled softly at him.
“Such an eager pet, aren’t you?” You teased him and he looked up. “That gift has to wait. Give me a knife,” you asked him.
He was confused but he handed you a short blade he was always carrying with himself.
“It’s so pretty,” you took a better look at the dagger in awe. It was really an excellent piece of work.
“Keep it,” your husband breathed out.
“But it’s your birthday, not mine,” you caressed his cheek gently.
“You need a weapon, too. I want you to keep it, just in case. When I’m not around and my uncle catches you in an empty room… For example,” he insisted.
“I don’t even know how to use it.”
“It’s a knife,” Feyd snorted. “You just stab.”
“Well, I guess. You can teach me more when I’m not with child anymore,” you proposed.
“I can,” he nodded and leaned in to place a kiss on your womb.
“So you do know how to kiss like that,” you teased and he looked caught off guard.
“I did it like you always do it… Did I do something wrong?” He asked and you swore, you could call him adorable in a way. You couldn’t believe it was the same man who had been slaughtering his enemies in the arena earlier.
“Aw, I’m only teasing. Give me your hand,” you ordered and he raised his arm as you slit one of the lines on his exposed palm. He didn’t even wince, so used to the pain much greater than this one. And he didn’t question anything you were doing either. It was almost sad, the way he obeyed you.
You watched his blood spilling down his pale skin; so dark and thick – it was nearly black and of a slimy texture. Then you cut yourself the same way, trying not to hiss out of pain as your own blood spilled, looking much healthier than his poisoned one.
You put the blade away and held his bleeding hand with yours to squeeze it tight. Feyd looked deep into your eyes, understanding the meaning of this gesture.
“I am yours and you are mine,” you told him. “Forever from now on. Your blood is my blood, my blood is your blood. We are one,” you whispered. “You do not exist without me and I do not exist without you. Together we will build our empire,” you continued and he nodded with a very serious expression on his face. There was pure admiration in his eyes, though. “We will not allow him to come between us.”
“We will kill him,” Feyd added angrily and you nodded at him. He was so eager.
“And everyone else in our way,” you assured him. “I shall be your anchor.”
“I shall be your blade,” he promised and you leaned down to join your lips together and mix your saliva like you mixed your blood.
You let go of his hand and straightened yourself, breaking the kiss. Feyd however brought your palm to his mouth and began to lick your wound as he drank the blood that spilled. Like dogs would lick their owners’ wounds.
“If I had known he’d give you Arrakis, I’d come up with a better gift,” you joked. Feyd looked up at you with your hand still pressed to his mouth, now stained with your blood.
“Nothing he’s ever given me can match you, my Baroness,” he confessed.
You smiled at him lovingly. It was a sight no one else in the world could admire – Feyd-Rautha on his knees, obedient and in awe. You finally opened your thighs in front of his face to give him what he had been waiting for since this morning. Most likely the gift he had been anticipating the most.
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MASTERLIST
1K notes · View notes
soaps-mohawk · 2 days
Text
Cherry Red, Crimson Blood
Chapter 14: The Aftermath
Summary: Your heat is over, now all that's left to do is heal.
Pairings: Poly 141 x reader, Price x Gaz
Word Count: 5100 words
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, smut, handjobs, heat cycles, mating cycles, brief medical stuff, Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, language, fluff, angst, nightmares, PTSD
A/N: Surprise!! Got this one done super early because I kind of just want to move forward with this fic and get to more exciting things so enjoy this bonus chapter. This weekend's update might come a day late, we'll see. Not entirely happy with this one, but it's really just setting up the next part so...yeah. Enjoy!!
Want early access to chapters, as well as other bonus content? Consider supporting me on Patreon.
MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->
(Gif found on Google)
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A rumbling purr vibrates in your chest. It’s a purr of contentment, of satisfaction. You’re warm, not like you had been nine days ago when your heat started, though. This is a comfortable warmth, a cozy warmth. You’re under blankets in your nest, pressed against a bare chest. You trail your fingers along smooth skin until you hit a familiar scar slicing through the skin, right below his clavicle. 
“Got that one outside a bar in Manchester.” 
You pause in your movements, tilting your head to look up at John. He’s staring down at you, his own fingers starting to trace a pattern on your back. 
“Was years ago. Some bloke was getting rowdy inside. Pulled him out to try and talk him down, and he pulled a knife on me.” 
“I can imagine what you did in response.” You murmur, laying your head back on his chest. 
John huffs out a laugh. “Left him with a couple missing teeth, and quite the dent in his head.” He smooths a hand over your side. “You feeling alright?” 
You hum in response. Your eyes feel dry and puffy from crying, and you’re terribly thirsty. You’re beginning to feel the ache in your body again, the steady pulse of pain between your legs starting up. “Hurting again.” You murmur, smacking your lips. “Kinda feels like I swallowed sand too.” 
“Almost time for another muscle relaxer.” He says, glancing at his phone before grabbing an electrolyte bottle from the nightstand. 
You push yourself up to sit, joints cracking as you go. You let out a quiet whimper at the ache in your body, eyes filling up with tears again. 
“Easy.” John tries to soothe you, brushing the hair from your face. “You’re alright.” 
“Sorry.” You sniffle, taking the electrolyte bottle. “It’s embarrassing.” 
“It’s not. It’s just a natural part of coming down from a heat.” John says as you gulp down the contents of the bottle. 
“My mom cried after her heats.” You say, putting the cap back on the electrolyte bottle. “I heard her once, when I was like seven or eight. My dad had picked us up from the care center on base. I wanted to see my mom, but their bedroom door was closed. I could hear her inside, crying alone. My dad scolded me, sent me back down the hall when he saw me. It never felt right to me, that she was in there alone like that, but maybe things are different when you have pups.” 
“I don’t think it was right.” John says as you lay back down against his side. He’s tense, limbs stiff even as his arm wraps around your back. 
“There were a lot of things my dad did that I questioned.” You say absentmindedly, tracing circles on John’s stomach to try and calm him. “Maybe it was just that inner part of me that knew I’d be an omega that made me notice it more. My brothers never said anything, but then again, they all presented as alphas.” You shift against John’s side, tucking your head so he can’t see your face. “Maybe I was just unlucky.” 
He grunts, squeezing your shoulder gently. “You can’t control what nature decides.” 
“Can’t control a lot of things.” You say quietly as he tightens his hold around you. “Suppose I am lucky in one regard.” 
“What’s that?” He asks. 
You shift yourself so you’re facing him, tears sliding down your cheeks again. “You’re a really good alpha.” 
He pulls you against his chest again, pressing your face into his neck. “I don’t know if I’d call myself that.” He says, gently stroking your hair. “Just treating you the way you deserve to be treated.” 
“You treat me like I’m a human being.” You sniffle, wetting his skin as you cry. “That’s better than I’ve been treated since I presented.” 
You don’t see the way his brow furrows, the frown tugging at his lips at your words. You do feel the way he tenses for a moment, arms clenching around you before he relaxes again, a quiet purr rumbling through his chest as he soothes you. 
“I haven’t left your side since your heat started.” He says, taking your hand in his. 
“Really?” You ask, brows pinching a bit at his confession. 
He hums. “Except to use the bathroom.” 
“You must be sick of me by now.” You say. 
“Never.” He says, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You’re my sweet little omega. Could never get sick of you.” 
You let out a soft purring noise, the sound slipping through your lips before you even realize it. Your eyes widen and you push yourself up out of Price’s neck in surprise. “I’ve never made that noise before.” 
Price smiles softly at you, reaching up to stroke your cheek. “Just means you’re happy.” 
“Hmm.” You lay yourself back down against his chest, resting your ear over his heart. You suppose you are happy. 
Or, at the very least, content.
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Standing hurts. 
Your legs feel a bit like jelly and your muscles ache deeply. It’s been almost five days since your heat ended, and yet you still feel like you just ran a marathon with no training beforehand. You know part of it is that you’ve been laid up for almost a week, but after that kind of physical exertion, you needed rest. You had only gotten up to stumble to the bathroom a handful of times, leaning heavily on John to avoid straining your muscles anymore than they already were. 
You should get up and start moving now, though. It will help with the stiffness, you know, and you should get the blood flowing at least a little. 
You’re also starting to go a bit stir crazy cooped up in your room all the time. You can only rearrange your nest so many ways, and you’ve even started to kick John out of the nest, opting to cuddle with your giant bear instead. 
You've showered, finally feeling properly clean for the first time in almost two weeks. You dress yourself, opting for the loosest clothes you own, and forgoing underwear. You’re not sure you can handle anything too tight on your skin yet. 
“Ready?” John asks, standing near the door. 
You nod, putting on your slippers as he opens the door. Arms wrap around you as soon as you step out into the hallway, your feet leaving the floor. 
“She lives!” Johnny exclaims, spinning you around. 
You grunt at the impact of the excited Scotsman, but wrap your arms around him anyway, taking in his citrusy scent. You have missed him, not realizing how boring life would be without him until now. You’ve even missed Ghost a bit, his looming presence making the world seem a little less big. 
“Easy, Johnny.” Ghost scolds the overjoyed beta. “She’s still breakable.” 
“Sorry, kitten.” Johnny says, immediately setting you back on your feet and loosening his grip around you. “Missed ye, is all.” 
“I missed you too.” You smile up at him. 
“Thought ye might never be comin’ out of that room.” He says. “Thought I might have tae go in and save ye.” 
You smirk. “You almost had to. Was starting to feel a bit stir crazy in there.” 
He grins playfully at you. “Well, yer more than welcome to spend the night elsewhere if yer sick of bein’ cooped up.”
“She's definitely not going to be doing any of that for a while.” John says, stepping up behind you. “R&R is the only thing on her schedule right now.” 
Johnny pouts. “But what if I just want tae cuddle?”
“Since when do you ‘just cuddle’?” Ghost asks. 
“I can just cuddle.” Johnny pulls you against his chest again, wrapping his arms around you tightly. “I'll do it for our ‘mega. I’ll prove it right now.” Johnny pulls away from you, steering you towards the rec room. 
“I’ll keep an eye on them.” Ghost says to Price, giving him a look before turning on his heel, following you and Johnny to the rec room. 
Johnny flops down on the couch, pulling you into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around you. You lean against his chest, breathing in his scent again. It’s refreshing, after being stuck in a room with the same scents. You could never grow tired of Price’s scent, but when it’s all you’ve been able to smell for an extended period, you start to get tired of it. You remember nearly tackling Kyle in an attempt to get a whiff of his scent, but the sting of scent blockers had nearly brought you to tears again. 
You let out a quiet sound as Johnny tilts his head, letting you breathe in his scent directly from the source. You start to purr quietly, nose pressed against his throat. An answering rumble begins in his own chest, his arms tightening even more around you. 
“Smell good.” You murmur, your lips brushing his skin. Goosebumps erupt across his neck, a shudder trailing down his spine. 
“Easy, mutt.” Ghost grumbles from the chair beside the couch, his eyes on you and Johnny. 
“Cannae help it.” Johnny almost whines, trying to ease you away from his neck. He grips your chin as your head lolls, a drowsy smile forming on your face as you blink up at him. “Christ, yer gettin’ scent drunk.” 
“Missed you.” You murmur, your brain quieting to a soft buzz as you lean your head on his shoulder, listening to the quiet rumble in his chest. 
“Missed you too.” He says, his hand dropping from your face. His fingers ghost over the mark on your shoulder, making you twitch in his arms. “Cannae believe yer officially part of the pack. Seems like just yesterday ye were arriving, all shy and timid. Now look at ye. Purring away on my lap with Price’s mark on yer shoulder.” 
Your cheeks warm at his words, a reminder of just how quickly things have changed. It’s only been almost seven weeks since you arrived in their lives. How quickly things have happened, how quickly things have changed. Though, you suppose things could have happened faster. You’re lucky they gave you so much time to adjust. Many alphas would have started the process as soon as you were in their sights. 
They’re not like that, though. They’ve turned your beliefs on their head and changed your perspective entirely. Alphas can be good and caring and don’t just always take what they want. 
You sniffle as tears pool in your eyes again, Johnny looking away from the TV to stare at you.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” He asks, sounding worried. 
“Nothing.” You say, pressing your face against his shoulder. “I’m just crying cause I’m happy.” 
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“I know, this is probably the last thing you want to be doing right now.” Dr. Keller says from the end of the exam table. “But, unfortunately, it is necessary.” 
You’re silently glad for the numbing spray, the pressure still enough to make you wince, but you can’t even imagine the kind of pain you’d be in if you weren’t numb. You wonder how many omegas have to go through this without it, how many are subjected to the horror without any sort of pain relief. 
“And we’re done.” She says, pulling away. “Everything looks good, no tearing or other injuries.” She pulls her gloves off, John helping you lower your legs from the stirrups. “Though, I’d suggest abstaining from any rigorous physical activity for at least another week.” 
Your face warms at the implication of her words. You’re not sure you’d want to anyway, at least not for a while. Aside from the soreness, after six days of near non-stop...activity, you might shrivel up and die if you see a naked man again anytime soon. 
“Do you feel up to chatting today, or would you rather go back to bed?” Dr. Keller asks as John helps you sit up. “Won’t hurt my feelings if you don’t want to.” 
You think about it for a moment, chewing on your lip before you answer. “We can talk.” 
She nods, smiling. “Aright. Take your time, I’ll be in my office when you’re ready.” 
She leaves the room, leaving you and John alone. You move slowly as you get dressed, still a bit sore and stiff. John walks you to the door, wrapping his arms around you before you can enter, pulling you against his chest. 
“Call me, if you need anything.” He says. 
You nod, staring up at him before you lift yourself onto your toes to kiss him. He purrs quietly when your lips touch his, his arms tightening around you for a moment before you pull back, staring up into his eyes for a moment before you turn away, heading into Dr. Keller’s office. 
You take your usual seat, silently grateful for how comfortable the chair is as you sit down. You’ve been avoiding sitting as much as possible, having spent the last few days lounging in bed with John and occasionally Gaz. 
“Comfortable?” Dr. Keller asks. 
You nod. “Yeah. Think this is the most comfortable chair I’ve ever sat in.” 
“Good.” Dr. Keller smiles. “You tell me if you get uncomfortable or if you want to end early, alright?” 
You nod again. “Yeah.” 
She nods, seemingly satisfied with your answer. “So, how are you feeling, aside from the discomfort? Your first heat with your pack, being claimed, that’s a lot all at once.” 
“It is a lot.” You acknowledge, picking at your sweatpants. “I’m still...I don’t know, processing it, I guess? It’s...a big step, but it was always going to happen. That’s why I’m here, right? To be their omega, to be part of their pack.” 
“That is true.” Dr. Keller agrees. “As much as I could say about it, you are right. This was the end goal of this entire experiment. But, how do you feel about it? Are you relieved that it’s over?” 
“Yeah.” You answer. “I’m glad that it’s over, that it’s done with. I...guess I feel lucky too.” You chew on your lip nervously. 
“In what way?” Dr. Keller asks. 
“John’s a...good alpha. I think I knew that before, but...he took care of me. He didn’t hurt me, he’s never forced me into anything.” A small smile tugs at your lips. “They’re all good pack members. Even Ghost.” 
“Good.” Dr. Keller smiles. “I’m glad you feel that way. John is a fantastic alpha. He cares a lot about you and your wellbeing.” 
“He treats me like I’m more than just my status. I feel like...like I’m a person again. Not just something that can serve others. I used to think that's just what omegas were supposed to do. At the institute, that's what we were taught. How to serve. But, I can see now how we do so much more than that.”
Dr. Keller practically beams at you. “That’s great! That’s so great that you’re beginning to discover your place in their pack. I think it will get easier, now that you’re official.” She nods towards your shoulder where your claiming mark now sits. 
You fight the urge to reach up and touch it, curling your fingers around the fabric of your sweatpants instead. It doesn't hurt anymore, other than slight soreness if you lay on that shoulder after a while. The scabs are beginning to come off, revealing the scar that will decorate your skin for the rest of your life, showing proof of your place in Price’s pack as his omega. 
“Do you feel different, being a claimed omega now?” Dr. Keller asks. 
You do feel different. Not just because you're a claimed omega now. There's something else, a sort of connection now that you've never experienced, even with your family. You don't know how to describe it, except for a slight buzzing in the back of your brain that only seems to quiet when you're near John. You don't really notice it until you think about it, and then you can't get it quiet until you're near John again. 
“Yeah.” You finally answer, trying to ignore the buzzing feeling in your brain. 
“The bond,” Dr. Keller says with a grin. “Hard to describe, so I've heard. I've also heard it lessens in intensity with time. Has anything else changed? Any feelings?” 
You shrug. “I guess I feel...better about being here. It’s still not ideal but...I feel happier.” 
“Yeah? Good.” Dr. Keller writes something down. “That makes me glad to hear. You’re getting along with everyone?” 
You nod. “Yeah. I’ve been getting closer to Kyle and Johnny. I know they’ll want to progress our relationships after I’ve healed a bit.” 
“Is that something you want?” 
You nod. It is something you want. Kyle has already seen you in your most vulnerable state, and you know Johnny has been anxiously awaiting his time. You’d even consider getting closer to Ghost, though, that would be entirely up to him and what he wants. You know getting closer to Johnny will inevitably force you and Ghost closer, but you won’t push the alpha’s boundaries. 
That will only end poorly for everyone. 
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John is awake instantly as soon as the knock comes at the door. He calls for them to enter, blinking the sleep from his eyes as he stares blearily at the computer screen in front of him. Simon’s giant form approaches the desk, sinking into the chair across from him. 
“Getting caught up?” Simon asks, looking him over. 
John nods. “Slow progress. Hard being out of commission for six days.” 
“Well, you didn’t miss much excitement. Laswell called a couple times. Kyle talked to her.” 
“That’s what he said.” John leans back in his chair. “Checking up on our girl.” 
“Sent over some things that might interest you as well.” 
“I see that.” John says, glancing at the email in his inbox. One of several hundred unread emails. 
“You look tired.” 
“Think I’m getting old, Simon.” John says, running a hand over his face. “I don't remember things being this rough, coming out of it.” 
“I’ve heard purebreds are different.” 
John gives him a look. “Thank you for holding down the fort.”
Simon shrugs. “Things are going to get difficult now.”
“We have a job to do, above everything else. That was something we knew from the start.” John says. 
“Things were different then.” Simon says. “It's going to be a struggle.”
“We knew that too.” 
“I'm not talking about the omega.” Simon's voice lowers, taking on the low rumble of Ghost. “I'm talking about you.”
John's back stiffens as he stares at his Lieutenant. “This doesn't change anything.”
“It changes everything.” Simon stands from his seat. “Just how much, we won't know until we're in it.” He turns, making his way towards the door. 
“You think you're immune?” John says, making him pause by the door. 
“No. But I've been keeping my distance for a reason.” He turns the handle on the door, turning to look back at John. “One of us has to have a clear head.”
John watches as the door closes, something tickling in the back of his mind. He sighs as he sinks back in his seat, eyes moving to the computer screen and his hundreds of unread emails. 
He closes the browser, shutting down the computer, staring at the screen until the hum of harddrive quiets. His skin is prickling now, thinking back on Simon's words. Of course things have changed. It would be no different had they added a fifth person to the team. He knows leaving will be hard, but they have a job, a duty to perform. That always comes first above all. 
Can he make it come first after this? 
He remembers how different things had felt after he claimed Kyle. His decisions became safer, but his actions became riskier to ensure Kyle's safety. It wasn't that he doubted Kyle's abilities. He knows Kyle is more than capable of taking care of himself. That's why he's on the team. It was his instincts needing to protect his pack, to ensure his beta's safety. 
What is he going to do now that there's an omega involved? 
You won't be going with them, you won't be in the field, but they'll have to leave you behind. It could be weeks before they'd see you again, if they see you again. 
The thought has a sick feeling churning in his stomach. 
Maybe Simon is right. 
Maybe things have changed too much. 
John rises from his seat, his joints cracking. He stretches, groaning quietly at the ache still present in his muscles. It's faded for the most part, but he can still feel it if he's immobile for too long. It's not the worst pain he's ever felt, but it's hard to think of a time he's felt worse. 
Maybe he is getting too old for this. 
He pauses outside Kyle's door, staring down at the knob. He feels bad for what Kyle had to go through the last almost two weeks. He knows it's a natural part of pack life, a natural role for betas, but he still feels guilty. 
“Everything alright?” Kyle's voice breaks through his thoughts. The door is open now. Kyle standing there in nothing but a pair of sweatpants. 
He hadn't even noticed the door open. 
“Yeah.” He clears his throat. “It's nothing. I don't want to bother you.”
“You're not bothering me.” Kyle gives him a worried look. “Just got out of the shower. You can come in, if you want.”
His feet are moving before he even thinks about it, Kyle closing the door behind him. He sinks down into Kyle's desk chair with a heavy sigh. 
“What's on your mind?” Kyle asks, grabbing the jar of coconut oil off his dresser. 
“Too much.” John answers, looking up at him as he approaches. “Everything's going to change now.” 
“Yeah,” Kyle says, setting the jar on his desk before scooping some out. “Things change all the time. We learn and adapt to them. That's what we do.” 
John watches him rub the oil on his face and neck, watching the movements of his hands. He's right. Always the voice of reason and logic. They were trained to adapt to anything. It was their job. They had adapted to your presence easily enough, they could adapt to this new development too. 
It would take time, but they could do it. 
“You're right.” He says, staring at Kyle's glistening skin. He wants to be the one to rub the oil onto his perfect skin, feel the softness of it under his hands. “Thank you. Thank you for everything. You've been a great help through this.” He stops Kyle from grabbing more coconut oil, grabbing some himself. “I owe you a lot for neglecting you these last couple weeks.”
“You weren't neglecting me.” Kyle says, giving him a small smile as John starts rubbing the oil over his shoulders. “You were taking care of our omega.” 
A satisfied growl rumbles through John’s chest at his choice of words. “Now let me take care of you.” 
Kyle’s breath stutters as John moves behind him, rubbing oil onto his back before moving to his chest. His fingers brush over Kyle’s nipples teasingly, pulling a quiet groan from the younger beta’s lips. John leans against his back, slipping his hands down lower, feeling the ridges of his muscles pulled taught from John’s touch. His lips press a soft kiss to the claiming mark on Kyle’s neck, Kyle’s head falling back against John’s shoulder. John growls in approval at the submissive position, his fingers trailing the waistband of Kyle’s sweatpants. 
John gathers more coconut oil on his hand before he slips them under Kyle’s pants, spreading the soft oil across his skin. He’d chosen to forgo briefs under his sweatpants, Price’s hand brushing against Kyle’s half hard cock. 
“Fuck...” Kyle breathes, arching into John’s touch. 
“How many times did you jerk off to the sound of us this last week?” John asks, wrapping his hand around Kyle’s cock. 
“At first I didn’t,” Kyle says, pressing his hips into John’s hand. “Was too focused on making sure nothing went wrong. But then...” He lets out a moan as John begins jerking his cock. “Then I couldn’t take it anymore. The mental image of you two together, the sounds she was making...” Kyle lets out a groan, squeezing his eyes shut as John brushes his thumb over the head of his cock. 
“Wanted to be in there with us, huh?” John asks, hooking his thumbs over the waistband of Kyle’s sweatpants, tugging them down so they drop around his ankles. “Did you imagine yourself right in the middle, taking my cock while she takes yours? Or did you imagine yourself taking my cock while our sweet omega sits on your face?” 
Kyle lets out a moan, his arms reaching back to grip John’s hips as his legs shake with pleasure. John continues to stroke his cock, pressing a gentle kiss to Kyle’s shoulder. 
“We can make that a reality.” John says, squeezing Kyle’s cock, earning a sweet moan in response. “I’ll show you all the places to touch that get her riled up. I’ll show you just how she likes it, how to get her legs shaking around your head.” 
Kyle’s nails bite into his skin, but he doesn’t care as he continues to jerk his cock, getting him closer and closer to the edge. Price drags his thumb over the tip, spreading precum on his skin. 
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Price growls in his ear, pumping his cock faster. “Want to know what she feels like wrapped around your cock?” His teeth nip at Kyle’s ear, his beta’s lips parted as he moans loudly. “Want to know what she tastes like?” 
“Fuck...yes!” Kyle almost whines, hips jerking as he cums, spurting all over John’s hand. “Yes, yes, yes!” 
John works him through his orgasm, continuing to lazily jerk his cock as Kyle twitches in his hold. He presses his nose against Kyle’s throat, inhaling the intoxicating mix of sweat, coconut oil, and his natural briney scent. He presses a soft kiss against his mark, finally stopping his movements to allow Kyle to recover. 
“Good boy.” He praises his beta, wrapping an arm around him to help him to his bed. 
“You really mean it?” Kyle asks as he drops onto the mattress, catching his breath. 
“We’ll have to ask her, of course.” John grabs Kyle’s sweatpants, cleaning off his hand before tossing them in the hamper. He moves back to Kyle’s bed, joining his beta. “But if she’s up for it, then so am I.” 
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You’re warm. The ice pack pressed against your forehead does little to soothe the burning under your skin. You’re thirsty, the two empty plastic bottles on your nightstand were not enough to ease the dryness in your mouth. 
Hands shift the ice pack, pressing it against your cheek. Your mother is there, seated next to your bed diligently. She’s crying, tears sliding down her cheeks, quiet sniffles breaking the silence in the house. 
“I’m sorry.” She whispers, bringing your hand to her lips. “I’m so sorry,” She apologizes, as if it’s her fault, as if she brought this onto you. 
She gasps quietly as the door opens, her back stiffening as your father enters. His face is stern, mouth almost twisted with disgust as he stares at you. It feels wrong, having him invade your space. If you’d had the energy, perhaps you would have been brave enough to protest his presence. 
“Come on.” His voice is gruff, worn down from years of smoking and yelling. “Get up.” 
“No, please-” Your mother attempts to reason with him, but he won’t have it. 
“Shut up.” He snaps at her, and she has no choice but to sit back and be silent. His voice has something tingling in the back of your neck, almost like a warning. There’s nothing you can do, though. You’re far too weak. 
He moves to the side of your bed, grabbing your arm and pulling you up from the comfort of your blankets. The ice pack falls from your head, your skin prickling with warmth almost like it hadn’t been there in the first place. Your brain is sluggish as you try to comprehend what’s happening, your legs giving out as you’re forced upright. You can’t get your body to work, you can’t even force yourself to behave. You want to crawl back under your blankets and lay there for the rest of eternity. 
You whine as you’re dragged from your room, knees knocking on the floor as you attempt to get your feet under you to ease the pain in your shoulder. Your father drags you into the living room, two people you don’t recognize standing next to the front door. 
“Please, please don’t do this!” Your mother pleads with him, right on his heels as he drops you in a heap in front of them. 
“Enough.” Your father snaps at her, looking down at you with disgust. “She’s no daughter of mine.” 
You blink up at him, the words registering through the haze. Tears gather in your eyes as you stare up at your parents, your siblings watching tensely from the living room as the scene unfolds before them. 
“No, no!” You cry as hands close around your arms, lifting you from the floor. “Mama!” You scream, trying to fight them as you’re pulled from your home, your safe space, your family, your pack. 
The last thing you see as the cool air outside washes over your feverish skin is your mother’s grief stricken face before the door closes, locking you out forever. 
You wake falling from bed. You hit the floor with a thud, gasping for breath. You slap your hands over your mouth before the sob can tear from your lips, not wanting to wake the others. You’re shaking, your heart thudding in your chest as tears slip down your cheeks, sliding over your fingers as they squeeze over your mouth, desperately muffling the sound. 
You hold your breath, forcing the pain and the panic and the grief back in. You can’t have these memories coming back to the surface, not now. Not when good things are finally starting to happen. Not when you’ve finally started to gain a glimmer of hope that things might turn out alright for you. You can’t ruin things now. 
You can’t let them see how broken you really are. 
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valeskafics · 2 days
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"Nothing Compares To You" - Feyd Rautha x Wife!Reader
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a/n: grouped a few similar anon requests together, hope y'all enjoy. just some fluffy feyd hehe 🩷
Summary: Things change between you and Feyd when he learns of an attempt on your life.
TW: profanity, innuendo, she/her pronouns, AFAB reader, physical violence, arranged marriage, pregnancy, tooth rotting fluff
Word Count: 2,000
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Dune characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.
Comments, likes, and reblogs are never required but are immensely appreciated 🩷
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Feyd’s uncle always taught him that love was weakness. That he should never let it cloud his mind or judgment. So, when he saw you for the first time, the young woman he was fated to marry, he did his best to ignore the pang in his chest, the longing brewing inside him. He ignored your kind smile, your gentle demeanor. He laid with you on your wedding night, doing his husbandly duty, but beyond that? He rarely sought you out. Feyd knew his coldness confused you. But he couldn’t afford to let himself fall in love with you. So keeping you at an arm’s length was the best option for everyone. Feyd has never known how to care for something, for someone. All his life, he has known only violence and pain. How in the world is he meant to know what to do when it comes to you? His sweet, gentle wife? The one who looks upon him with such sadness when he goes to his concubines after dinner every night instead of to her bed?
Feyd has never been cruel to you. But he has refrained from showing you the warmth it is that you so clearly crave. You share your meals together in sustained silence, you make your appearances together without him giving you the affection it is you desire. And each time he sees you, his will to keep you at a distance weakens. His resolve hangs on by a thread that grows more and more precarious with each passing day. Every gentle smile you give him despite his aloof demeanor, every graze of your hand against his. Slowly, but surely, you have begun to wear him down.
The day you are attacked is the day everything truly changes for the two of you. He receives word from one of his slaves that you are in the hospital wing. Feyd races as fast as his feet can carry him, finding you laying there, your body battered and bruised, your body and face marred by injuries. There is an unpleasant sinking in his chest as he gazes upon you, turning to the doctor and demanding to know what happened. He shouldn’t be surprised to learn that this was the handiwork of his Harpies, but he is. Rage bubbles up inside him. He had explicitly demanded that they never touch you. And the simmering flame of his rage grows to a fiery inferno at the doctor’s next words.
“We are lucky the na-Baroness was found when she was and that she didn’t lose the baby, na-Baron.”
His child. That one night, your wedding night, had borne fruit. You were carrying his heir. Feyd grits his teeth, the steady rise and fall of your chest the only indication that you are still alive. You look so small and fragile laying there in that bed. It makes him sick. It shatters everything in him that he thought he knew. Feyd’s only thoughts are of you now, of his need for you to wake up and look at him with those soft eyes, to hear your sweet voice once more. He stays at your side for the next three days. He ignores his uncle’s demands that he join him in matters regarding the administration of Giedi Prime, roaring with anger that his first and foremost duty is to protect you and his unborn child.
Three days later, you wake, your eyes fluttering open, your voice raspy and weaker than he’s ever heard it before as you question, “Feyd…? What happened?”
He whispers your name, rushing to be at your side, helping you sit up. It physically pains Feyd as you groan and wince in pain, his touch uncharacteristically gentle and doting as he brings a cup of water to your lips. After a few moments of allowing you to catch your breath, you speak again.
“The last thing I remember was the Harpies…”
Feyd does his best to hold back the snarl of rage that threatens to escape his lips, wiping your feverish brow as he explains, “They tried to kill you.”
“Kill me?” You question incredulously, your blood pressure and heart rate rising on the monitor, “Why? You haven’t even touched me since the wedding night! I’m no threat to them!”
He takes a deep breath to calm himself, his fists clenched as he remembers how you looked. Lying there unconscious, vulnerable and defenseless. A sweet, innocent woman caught in a cruel fight that was never yours to begin with. Everything has changed for Feyd in this moment.
“They attacked you because they know you carry…”
Your eyes go wide as the realization hits you, lips parting in shock, “I’m pregnant? But we only… We only ever slept together on the wedding night! Surely just one time couldn’t have resulted in a pregnancy.”
The corners of Feyd’s lips turn up in a slight smile, his gaze soft as he murmurs, “Sometimes it only takes one time, little one.”
You frown at the pet name ever so slightly. Feyd knows that you must be confused by the sudden tenderness he is treating you with, his complete 180 in demeanor. However, you shake your head and face him again, a new determination in you. A mother’s strength as you rest your hand on your stomach, protecting the unborn baby in whatever way you can, fire in your eyes and a steely resolve to you that makes Feyd feel a strange rush of desire.
“I want them gone, Feyd,” you demand firmly, gazing into his eyes, “I don’t care that they’re your concubines. Find new ones. I want them gone.”
He nods, “Do you want them punished as well?”
“Banish them, execute them, I don’t care. I just want them away from my baby.” It’s strange, but he relishes in your demand. In the power in your voice. Something stirs inside of him at the sight of you like this as you continue speaking, “And I promise you, Feyd, if they don’t leave? I will. I don’t care who you spend your time with. I know this wasn’t a love match. But I’ll be damned if your Harpies touch my baby ever again.”
Feyd’s head is spinning as he nods, your voice still echoing in his head, answering without a moment’s hesitation, “They will be executed. It will be done.”
“Good.” You lean back, wincing slightly in pain, waving him away when he tries to assist you, “I’m fine.”
“I don’t want you to feel pain,” he blurts out, your pain becoming so unbearable as if it’s being inflicted on his own person, “You are not fine. You’ve been hurt. I cannot have that.”
You scoff, “Really? You haven’t cared about me at all these last three months. Is it different now that you’ve bred me?”
Feyd’s heart sinks, anger spiking inside him. There is truth to your words. He has done his best not to care for you since the day you came to Giedi Prime. But he is done pretending. He clenches his jaw, meeting your gaze.
“Don’t speak to me that way. I’m your husband.”
“I will speak to you in whatever way I wish,” you retort sharply, your glare harsh enough to intimidate even the bravest of men, “Your playthings nearly killed my baby. I want those murderesses gone.”
It’s strange. The old him would have snapped back with a callous remark. But the man he is now, the man who thought he was going to lose you? He feels something he has never felt with another woman. He feels like he is yours. Completely yours. Your servant. He tries to give you a stern gaze.
“You are bold tonight.”
“I am a mother now. It is not only myself I have to protect.”
Your doctor returns, declaring that you will require two weeks of bedrest. That you will need to be accompanied at all times. You scowl, exclaiming that the whole thing is ridiculous, but Feyd smiles, saying he will be glad to care for you as you recover from your injuries. He lifts you into his arms, spiriting you back to the bedchamber the two of you were meant to share. The one he never came back to after that first night. He smiles to himself at seeing how you’ve made it your own, little touches here and there that make it so quintessentially you. He lays you down on the bed, watching you glower up at him.
“I have slept alone every night even since we’ve been married. I intend to continue doing so.”
Feyd shakes his head resolutely, “No. You will not. I will stay here and care for you.”
He watches as you struggle to make yourself comfortable in the plush bed, his heart squeezing uncomfortably as he catches a glimpse of the bruises that litter your body. You lay on top of the quilt, groaning slightly as he moves to help you.
“You don’t need to look so guilty. It wasn’t your fault.”
You sit up and he moves to sit beside you, his fingertips gently tracing the bruise that goes up your neck, whispering, “How could it not be my fault? I have failed you. As a husband and as the father of your child.”
You shiver slightly as he continues, his hand moving down to rest against your chest, feeling the beating of your heart, “You couldn’t have known how ambitious they were. You’d given them an order and expected them to obey. They were yours, you thought better of them.”
Feyd leans in, resting his forehead against yours, rasping, “They were mine, yes. But you are mine as well. You are my top priority.” His hands move to caress the curves of your body, groaning at the feeling of your soft flesh against his palms, “Don’t keep me away. I was selfish. And scared. My uncle always taught me love was a weakness. And when I first saw you, I knew you were the only woman who could ever make me fall in love. My body, my heart. They ached for you every single day. I was so afraid of losing myself to you. You tempted me with every smile. Every kind word. Every touch.”
“You’re a fool,” you murmur softly, your hand reaching to touch his cheek, “Temptation is when you are not meant to have something. Feyd, you’re meant to have me. To love me. You chose to slake your lust with your Harpies. Did you think I would not have welcomed you into my bed? You’re my husband.”
“They never compared to you,” he replies, his fingertips tracing the Cupid’s bow of your lips, “Nothing compares to you.”
“I’m well aware.”
He chuckles as you grant him the greatest gift he could have ever asked for. That sweet smile of yours. Aimed at him. Feyd leans in and kisses you, his touch rough and demanding. He does not know how to love gently, but when you trace his cheekbones with your fingers, your touch so soft and soothing, he nearly freezes in place. He moans against your lips, laying beside you, holding your body close to his as you continue to engage in this languid kiss, slowly exploring each other’s bodies. He refuses to take you, not in this fragile state. In two weeks, when you are recovered, he will claim your body once again. But for now, he’s perfectly content to lay here like this, kissing his sweet wife.
“I don’t mind your nature,” you whisper against his lips, “Your love is violent. Mine is gentle. We can have both. We need both.”
Your words, your presence, it all lights a fire within him as he continues to explore your mouth with his tongue, the taste of you being committed to his memory, wrapped in each other’s arms, finally experiencing the marital bliss you two had robbed yourselves of.
Feyd knows now that love is not a weakness.
His love for you makes him strong.
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staryukis · 1 day
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✰ f!reader x roomie!gojo ✰ smut (MDNI), making out + dry-humping, satoru cums in his pants lololol (…but so do you) ++ here is some actual roomie!gojo writing based on this and this ...i wrote this with one hand btw ✰
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it always starts the same and ends the same— what started as an innocent movie night for you and your roommate ended with him pulling you into his lap for possibly the hundredth time in the last few weeks, his hands grabbing your waist firmly as you pressed yourself against his chest, making out like neither one of you had ever kissed anyone before.
satoru wouldn’t have it any other way. he hopes you don’t mind, either; though he’s sure that’s the case already, if the way you eagerly kiss him back is anything to go by.
the sound of your lips smacking against his is the only thing that resonates in your ears; the tv has long since drowned out behind you. you can feel your heartbeat steadily picking up, thrumming against your ribcage and muffling every other noise in the room that isn’t directly coming from satoru.
testing it out, your tongue swipes over his bottom lip briefly; you hear a small groan rumble in the back of his throat. just as you’d expected, the sound was as clear as day to you— it echoes in your mind and only serves to make you press yourself harder against his chest.
he hums again, hands tightening their grip around your waist, feeling his eyes roll back in his head even though they’re already closed. he’s certain that he’s died and gone to heaven, because the feelings swirling in his chest and low in his gut are so amazing it makes him feel like he’s floating— like he could walk on water and turn that very liquid into wine.
(he briefly wonders if that wine would taste as good as you do.)
there’s a moment where your lips slow, mouth parting further against him for a moment before you’re pulling back. it’s like clockwork— you both make out for a few minutes, you pull away for a breath of air, clear your throat, and then you climb off his lap. the two of you move on with the acknowledgement that the air around you is charged with something intense, and it’s part of the reason why he keeps coming back for more throughout the day.
he expected this already, so he keeps his eyes closed; savoring the feeling of your swollen lips for now, how plump they feel against his own as you pulled away from him. he can feel the string of your saliva connecting you two; he doesn’t need to open his eyes to see the way the thin liquid stretches until it bows and snaps, making his mouth feel wetter than it already was. his own lips part for a small breath of air, one hand subconsciously sliding up your back, and his eyes flutter open in mild surprise at what you do next.
he’d expected you to have climbed off his lap at this point, but when he opens his eyes he catches a glimpse of something in your own gaze before you’re leaning back in. maybe you’d been encouraged by the slide of his hand along your spine, arching into his touch and reaching out for more. he doesn’t really have the time to go over it in his head because all his thoughts are jumbled the very second he feels your lips pressing against his again.
okay, okay— this is fine, he’ll just kiss you back for a few more minutes and then you’ll probably want to pull away for real this time.
but that… doesn’t happen. he swipes his tongue over your lower lip again, and he feels his chest tighten when your lips part eagerly, accepting the slip of his tongue inside of your mouth. you both usually stop before it gets this far, this heavy, but right now he can’t bring himself to— and neither can you, apparently.
his tongue enters your mouth and swirls around yours, and you tighten your grip on his shoulders at the way the sensation shoots through your gut. it’s not long before you’re both panting loudly into the kiss, louder than ever— messily kissing each other and shoving your tongues down each other’s throats.
the air around you feels hotter, you feel hotter. satoru’s grip can’t seem to relax from the way he’s moving his hands erratically along your sides. everything is making your blood rush south and something pulses to life between your legs; and when you shift against his lap to press yourself further into him, that’s when he knows he’s too far gone— his cock immediately twitches in his pants.
he stutters, breaking the kiss briefly for a breath of air, but then you’re shifting over him again and he feels himself start to strain his pants further. he blinks, wanting to stop this before it gets too far with you, his roommate— but he’s acting on pure instinct and unbridled desire at this point. his head rolls back onto the cushion behind him, hands tightening around your waist to keep you still over his lap, chest rising and falling rapidly.
you breath fans across his neck with every pant that leaves your lips, and you blink at him for a moment. you have half a mind to climb off his lap now but there’s a dull ache low in your gut and, for some reason, you think he needs to be the one to do something about it.
“‘toru,” you mumbled, sliding a hand from his shoulder over to the side of his neck, cupping it gently. you hear the way his breath hitches, his adam’s apple bobbing over his throat as he swallows thickly before replying.
“jus— just a second, i’m—…” he stammers, swallowing again. unbeknownst to you, he’s trying to will his dick to soften up again (as if it’d been soft at all from the moment you climbed onto his lap, but that’s not the point). “i’m just catching my breath.”
you hum, somewhat uncertain. you decide not to question it, but you know there’s more to it when you try to move off him, only for him to pull you back down onto his thighs with a small grunt.
“sator—”
“wait, just—” he lifts his head up now, meeting your gaze. despite trying to relax himself he doesn’t want you to stop just yet; there’s this desperation in his eyes that only serves to make you throb harder, the urge to press your thighs together for some friction now stronger than ever. he feels your thighs clench around his own and he’s now given up entirely on trying to calm down.
your hand cupping the side of his neck slides to the back of his head, scratching your fingers along his scalp, and his breath hitches once more. your start at his undercut and move up to the longer strands of hair, and then you’re firmly gripping the back of his head and pulling him back in for another rough kiss before you can change your mind.
he groans this time, loud and unashamed, the sound rumbling from the back of his throat and slipping out past his parted lips. your hips shift over him again, moving closer to his abdomen, slotting right over his—
he freezes. you freeze. your lips slow to a stop but neither of you pull away, nor do you open your eyes. you wonder if satoru can feel you throbbing through the layers of fabric separating you two.
his eyebrows furrow for a moment, and he nips at your lower lip a little impatiently.
“do you want to sto—”
“no.”
your answer comes quick, firm and resolute. you swallow nervously for a moment, the ache between your legs only growing, and you can now feel the way his own arousal is growing steadily, too. you’re absolutely lightheaded.
he inhales sharply and then presses forward again, now pulling you ever closer above his crotch. your bodies are now completely flush together, lips moving in sync with each other, coaxing another noise to bubble up in satoru’s chest. you’re still panting and your hips jerk slightly on their own accord, a moan threatening to break past your lips at the brief friction it gave you.
satoru mumbles something against your lips, pulling back slightly so you could understand him better.
“do it,” he murmurs, his forehead leaning against yours while he gazes at you through white lashes. “if it feels good for you, then do it.”
your own lidded eyes blink at him for a moment, jaw going slack before you nodded your head. carefully, slowly, you rolled your hips forward, rubbing your mound against his growing erection, and almost immediately your eyes roll back into your head at the sheer relief you feel. he feels his own mouth drop open as he watches the way your face scrunches up in pleasure, steadily setting a rhythm over him with the encouragement of his hands on your waist.
“fuck, that’s it,” he groans, eyes threatening to close from the friction he’s finally getting on his cock. “make yourself feel good, that’s all i want… fuuuck—”
his words make you whine softly, your face heating up instantly. shyly, you duck your head forward, letting it land in the crook of his neck to hide your face from him. he laments not getting to see your lust-filled eyes anymore, but then his lips brush against the shell of your earlobe to whisper more obscenities in the form of praises while you rock your hips against him. you’re certain you’ve soaked all the way through your pants by now.
“shit,” you panted against his neck, moving faster, gripping his arms tightly when he started to aid your movements with his hands over your hips. “that— that feels so good.”
“yeah?” he breathes, nipping at your ear when you nod against him. his own head finally drops down into your neck and he inhales your scent, feeling himself grow impossibly harder. his hips start to buck up slightly, and the two of you moan in tandem.
he’s not sure when it got to this point anymore, the two of you rutting against each other so desperately, not even really making out anymore. you’re both hiding your faces in each others necks but there’s no hiding the sounds you’re both making, soft whines and moans now filling the humid air surrounding you.
satoru feels so hot and he’s never been so hard in his life; the way he’s straining his jeans is making him feel like he’s going to cum at any second. the pressure he feels low in his gut is steadily rising the more he feels and hears you against him, and he’s certain this is the fastest buildup to an orgasm that he’s had since he was a teenager.
and he can tell you’re getting close too, from the way your hips momentarily stutter over his.
“you gonna cum, angel?” he moans, not wanting you to slow the movement of your hips for a second. when you whine and nod hastily he briefly takes over, gripping your waist hard enough to leave bruises, helping your rock your hips faster over his own. the consistent friction from his clothed cock against your pulsing clit makes your mouth drop open in a silent gasp, your eyes crossing one final time as a particular buck of his hips finally pushes you over the edge.
a small squeak leaves your lips, followed by a sharp gasp as you come undone from the inside out. you gush inside of your pants, unintentionally moaning his name into his neck, and that alone is enough to send satoru tumbling over the edge with you. he cums hard, white briefly flashing over his eyes as he moans deeply into your neck, soiling his boxers with his own cum. he bites down onto your shoulder as you both ride through it, your bodies sweaty underneath your clothes and rubbing against each other with no rhythm whatsoever.
it takes a while before the two of you slow to a stop, panting heavily against each other’s shoulders. neither of you have bothered lifting your heads, too stuck in the post-nut haze that surrounded you both. satoru can feel your body starting to finally relax and go limp over his own, but he’s not sure his cock is softening fast enough in his pants for him to relax with you.
(that’s an issue for later, he thinks to himself.)
he swallows thickly, his throat feeling dry from all the sounds he made. “you, um— …you okay?” he mumbles, finally lifting his head from your shoulder, gently coaxing you to do the same.
you nodded against him, instead tightening your grip around his arms to stay in place. “yeah, just… just want a few more minutes, like this,” you mumbled, keeping your face hidden against his shoulder for reasons unknown to him.
he decided not to overthink it too much. his hands moved up to rub your back soothingly now, sighing softly as he leans his head against yours. he almost closes his eyes, oddly content with the way you feel against him like this, but that doesn’t make his cock soften any faster.
he may have to excuse himself to the bathroom after this, all with the intention of… taking care of his problem. he has enough material now to last him a full decade, he’s certain.
but for now, he’ll just keep holding you for a little longer, memorizing the way your heart beats against his chest. (he doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of this.)
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vivwritesfics · 2 days
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Work For It
Daniel had turned their girlfriend into a pillow princess. Max needs him to fix it
Warnings: 18+, smut, oral (male receiving), dom!daniel, dom!max, sub!reader, reader gets called a brat, reader gets called a good girl, spitroasting, p in v, cum swallowing
1.6K
Max x reader x daniel
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Daniel had created a monster.
When their relationship had first started, their girl had been as willing to give as she was to take. She'd get on her knees for them, ride them until the sun rose. They'd do the same for her in return, happy to pay to make her as good as she made them feel.
But then Daniel began giving her everything she wanted. All she had to do was pout a little and wrap her arms around his neck. He'd kiss her pouty lips and carry her to their bedroom to bring her pleasure.
Max had to deal with the burden of it. Where Daniel was happy to do anything she asked, Max wasn't. If she wanted him to help her get off, she was going to have to return the favour.
But Daniel had turned her into a princess. A pillow princess. And Max had to do something about it. He couldn't go to her though, not when she knew she had Daniel wrapped round her finger. So, he went directly to the source.
He waited until she was napping (a regular occurrence, since she stayed up with Max most nights) to talk to Daniel.
"She hasn't sucked me off or ridden in weeks, Daniel," Max confessed, his tone hushed.
Daniel shrugged his shoulders. "I'll suck you off," he said.
"Yeah, I know you will," Max snapped, but he quickly regained his composure. "But that's no the point," he said as he laid back against the couch cushions. "She doesn't do anything by lay there. You've turned her into a pillow princess and you need to fix it."
"Okay," Daniel agreed. "You, you're right. I miss seeing her on her knees for us."
Max leaned in and kissed him, an act that was quickly reciprocated. But before Daniel could push his fingers through Max's hair, messing it up, he pulled away. "Besides, if she doesn't go for it, we could always fuck each other, leave her high and dry."
So, it was decided. The next time she went to Daniel, wearing that tempting pout, he'd say no. He wouldn't give into her (but somehow Max doubted that would actually happen).
The next day, while Max was racing on the sim rig, she went to Daniel. As usual, she wore her prettiest pout as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Danny," she whined, pressing her body against his.
As her body moved against him, she felt just how hard he was in his shorts, just from her touch alone. She was going to get everything she wanted, she thought as she bit back her grin, trying to maintain her pout. "I need you," she whispered.
Daniel squeezed her arms around her, but then he gently pushed her away. "Baby, if you want Max and I to fuck you, you're gonna have to earn it."
Her pout only grew. "But Dannyyyy," she whined as she let her fingers trail down his chest, towards his trousers. This time she couldn't hide her grin as she touched his hardening length.
Again, he gently pushed her away. "Go and suck Max off if you want to get off," he said, pointing to the other room, where the rig was.
Her pout turned into a scowl as she turned away from him, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Fine," Daniel called back as she went to stride out of the room. "You can go grumble about it and stay needy, or you can go and give Max a blow job," he said.
That stopped her in her tracks. She momentarily dropped the attitude, threw her head back, and groaned. "Fine," she muttered and took off, walking towards Max as he raced.
As she approached, she knocked on the wall. "Are you streaming?" She asked.
When Max shook his head, she approached and got down onto her knees beside him. She still wore that same scowl as got onto her knees beside him. "Schat, what're you doing?" He asked as she fished him out of his shorts.
"He won't touch me, Maxie, not until I suck you off."
Max smirked as she moved her hand up and down his shaft. He sat back, sat comfortably, went went back to racing. "Better get to work, then."
The scowl returned to her face as she moved closer, taking his cock into her mouth. It had been so long since she had last done this, it was only a matter of moments before her knees began hurting and her jaw started aching.
Plus, Max could tell she wasn't putting her all into it. But he said nothing, just shaking his head as Daniel walked into the room and sat, watching them. "She's got quite an attitude, doesn't she?"
Daniel scoffed, laughing. "She's being a little brat at the minute," he said. "Feel free to fuck her throat if you need to."
She pulled off of Max, releasing him with a pop! She sat back, trying to give her knees a rest. She wiped at her mouth, but she didn't have much time before anything else before Daniel was behind her, holding her head, pushing her back towards Max's cock. "I don't think he said you can stop."
Although he was pushing her, Daniel was still gentle. He eased her onto Max's cock, moving her back and forth. He didn't push her all the way around, didn't push her until she was gagging.
Drool ran down her chin when Daniel finally let go of her. He watched for her a moment as she worked through her aching jaw, hollowing her cheeks. Max moaned, his eyes shut as he bucked his hips towards her. He had long since crashed his virtual car, too distracted by the way she was sucking him.
"Good girl," said Daniel, hooking his fingers around the waistband of her little shorts. When he tugged them down and squeezed her ass, she moaned around Max (which felt like heaven to him).
He let her go just a little longer before touching her more. Her shorts were around her knees as Daniel touched her, felt through her folds. Her eyes were shut and she whined, taking just a moment to feel his fingers.
Max bucked up into her lips and she got to work once again. He patted her head as she moved his lips up and down his shaft. When Daniel touched her clit she jolted forward slightly, but she never released Max from her lips.
She pulled back, swirling her tongue around his tip.
"Do you think she's deserved it?" Asked Daniel as he felt just how wet she was.
"Fuck," Max hissed, steadily rocking his hips into her mouth. "Y-Yeah, she's earnt it," he replied, somewhat shakily. He never wanted it to end.
Daniel certainly agreed. He freed himself from the confines of his shorts and rubbed himself through his folds. He slowly pushed through as she let out a cry.
"You earnt this, baby," he whispered before he thrust into her.
She pulled her mouth away from Max's cock to cry out. "Fuck, Danny!" She cried as she threw her head back.
Daniel thrust into her a few times before stopping. If she wasn't going suck Max off, he wasn't going to fuck her. She let out a whine, grinding back against him. "C'mon, Danny," she said as she turned back to him and pouted.
The pout was really starting to piss him off now. "Get back to it," he said, swatting at her ass.
She returned her lips to Max, swirling her tongue around the tip before taking his entire length down her throat. She worked hard while Daniel fucked her, determined to make Max fuck.
"Oh fuck, fuck," Max cried, his fingers gripping her hair. "I'm close." He tried to pull her off, but she batted his hand away and kept working, until he was spilling his seed into her mouth.
She swallowed all he gave to her and released him from her mouth. Max grabbed her chin, forcing her to look up at him as Daniel fucked her. She opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue, showing that she had swallowed it all. "Wow, princess," Max said, running her thumb over her lips.
Her eyes shut and small whines left her lips and Daniel pounded into her. "Fuck, you should feel her," he grunted as he looked towards Max.
The way she was clenching around him, it had Daniel so close. "Fucking hell." He swatted her ass again and she squeezed him tighter.
"Fuck, Danny, I'm..."
But that was as much warning as she could give him before she was finished, her body convulsing. It took a moment before she stilled, limp body held up by Max and Daniel.
Max ran his fingers through her hair, the feeling so comforting as she came down. Daniel kept going, but his pace as slowed, become sloppy. His grunts filled the apartment before he pulled out of her, spilling onto her back.
He kept a hold of her, keeping her up. Max stood, passing her to Daniel as he want to run a bath for her.
"You did so good, Baby," said Daniel as he wrapped her in his arms. "I'm so proud of you."
She curled into Daniel's hold, her head against his chest as she kissed his skin. "Thank you, Danny," she whispered, running his fingers through his hair. "But, do we have to do that again? I miss you taking care of me."
Daniel's laugh shook his entire body. "Nice try, princess," he said as he picked her up, carrying her to the bathroom.
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helen-with-an-a · 1 day
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You always have an excuse
Hi. So this is a request and I really liked the idea. Hopefully, I did it justice. I hope you enjoy
Barca Femeni x reader
Description: R always has excuses but eventually slips up.
Word Count: 3.8k
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Shit. Shit. Shit. You were late. You were so late. But it wasn’t your fault; indeed, honestly, it wasn’t your fault. Your parents were not the greatest at being parents. They had you when they were just 16 and far too young to be having children. Sure, they paid for your football stuff and gave you a lot of what you asked for, but it was to keep you quiet and out of the house. You didn’t mind too much. It was easier when you only had to look out for yourself, never telling your parents where or who you were with. You always had a range of excuses ready for anyone who asked – lying and telling your friend’s parents that someone else would be taking you home, saying your mum was just around the corner, she had work so couldn’t come to your matches. It was fine. You knew nothing different.
You signed for La Masia when you were 10. The training was intense, but you loved it. You thrived under the pressure, quickly working your way up the ranks. Your debut for the first team happened shortly before your 16th birthday. You had never felt prouder of yourself.
“And here we have it. At just 15 years old, Y/F/N Y/S/N, making her debut for FC Barcelona Femeni. She’s homegrown, working her way up La Masia ranks. She is definitely a future star.” The commentator said as you made your way onto the pitch. This is what you have been dreaming of since you discovered football. This was the dream that only some people achieved. And you were one of them. A professional footballer. Your life’s goal was achieved.
The game was an easy win. The other team was fighting a relegation battle, as Barca slipped 10 goals past their keeper.
“Vamos,” Patri shouted as she shook you by the shoulders. “A debut and a brace. Is that a Ballon d’Or I see in your future?” You laughed as she wrapped you in a fierce hug.
“Neña, what a performance, hey?” Mapi called as Alexia affectionately hit the back of your head.
“Where’s your Mamí? I’m sure she wants to see you after that performance.” You didn’t even bat an eyelid as you smiled sweetly at Marta
“Oh, she said we’d meet outside by the main gates – saves us from trying to find each other on the pitch and in the crowd.” You waved at the chaos surrounding you. You knew your mother was nowhere near the football stadium – you doubted she even knew you had a football match, let alone your senior debut. It was easy to slip away from the changing rooms; you had significant practice doing it most of your life.
And now you were running so, so late. You had woken up on time, but the food in the house looked a little off, so you rushed to get something from the bakery on your way to the bus stop. But the line was bigger than anticipated, so you were rushing to catch the bus. A man walking in the other direction wasn’t paying attention and crashed into you, causing you to drop your stuff and spill hot coffee all over yourself. That had disrupted your flow, and you missed the bus, having to wait 5 minutes for the next one, which wasn’t a big deal. However, the metro system was delayed. And now you were 10 minutes behind, and then the bus you were supposed to catch from the metro station to the training centre never showed up, so you had to catch an alternative one, making you 30 minutes late. You had texted Jona to tell you you were running late but you knew you had laps waiting for you when you actually got there. You arrived at the pitch hot, sweaty, and tired. This was not an ideal start to the morning.
It was a known ‘Alexia Rule’ that every minute late to practice without a reasonable excuse was a lap. As you arrived at the huddle, one boot on, one still in your hand and your shirt stained with coffee, you could tell she was unimpressed. With all your rushing, you had forgotten to think of an excuse. You didn’t want to tell her the real reason; you had a feeling ‘Oh, sorry Alexia, I’m late because my parents are really shitty, forget they have a kid sometimes, and they haven’t been home in over a week, and the food in the fridge looked a little funky’ would not go down too well. She arched an eyebrow at you.
“Um …” You floundered, thinking about what to say. You could tell her the semi-truth that the metro was delayed and you had missed the buses, but they thought you got dropped off at the top of the road by your dad on the way to work. You could tell them there was traffic, but they all drove, so they knew you were lying.
“You have 30 laps to run at the end of training,” Alexia had a stern voice that you knew meant she was serious. 30 laps? That was basically 10k. Your eyes widened to comically sized proportions. 45 minutes of running around in a circle … after training? She was trying to kill you; you were convinced of it.
“You can’t be serious?” You gawked at her. Her other eyebrow rose to join the other one.
“Deadly.” She said icily and walked away.
Holy fuck. You were really, royally fucked this time. You were so dead. You had to miss training. But again, it hadn’t been your fault. The boiler had broken in your house, which wasn’t a big deal – it was late spring in Barcelona, and you didn’t need heating. But you did need the hot water. You had tried to ask your parents to stay home whilst someone fixed it, knowing that you had training and they could definitely work from home for a day. They had dismissed you with a flippant wave of their hands and continued what they were doing. You phoned the company, asking them to come and fix it as soon as possible. But, as expected, they told you they would be there before lunch, which was the best they could offer. It was now 2.30pm, and there was no sign of them. You had texted Jona this morning, offering a weak excuse of feeling a little rough. You hadn’t expected him to tell Alexia that you were feeling bad, and it sounded like you were home alone.
The knock on the door had you running towards it – thinking it was the person coming to fix the boiler. “Gracias, Gracias. Es el …” You rushed the explanation, not realising that it was not a plumber but rather your irate captain. You froze as you looked up. Shit.
“You look fine, neña. You don’t look like you’ve … what was it? Ah, yes, ‘picked up a little something’.” She was far too calm. You could see her anger bubbling under the surface, though.
“Ale, I-” you tried to explain.
“No, no quiero escucharlo,” she cut you off, a hand raising to stop you. “You lied. You skipped training. Was it worth it? Was it so much more important than training?” She hadn’t bothered to come into the house, standing at your front door, a bag of things meant to help you feel better in her hand. “Here,” she shoved it at you. “You’re on the bench until you can prove that you want to be a part of Barcelona Femeni.” And with that, she stormed off.
Tears welled in your eyes. She hadn’t let you explain … but what could you say? ‘Sorry, Ale, my parents are arseholes and don’t realise that I have a life and a job as well’? ‘Sorry, Ale, I had to wait for the plumber to come and fix our heating and hot water, and no, my parents – the adults in the house – couldn’t do it because they think their time is so much more important than mine’? ‘Sorry, Ale, I’m currently trying to raise myself, and whilst I’m usually ok at it, sometimes I fuck up’? You couldn’t say those things to her. You couldn’t tell her how tough your life could be sometimes … most of the time. You couldn’t tell her that your parents don’t even know you have a game, let alone watch it or attend it. You couldn’t tell her you often wake up in an empty house for weeks because your parents jetted off somewhere again. You couldn’t tell her that you doubt your parents could even tell you your full name and birthday.
She thought you didn’t want to be a part of Barca. Barca was your saving grace. Barca was the only thing that got you out of bed. The friendships you made were the closest thing to a normal family you had. Jana, Vicky, Martina, Patri, Claudia, Bruna, Esmee, Salma … they were your crazy cousins, always making you laugh and willing to go along with your mad ideas. Ona, Aitana, Lucy, Cata, Mapi … they were your big sisters, always protecting you on and off the pitch and lightly teasing you. Ingrid, Caro, Keira, Mariona, Frido … they were the calming aunts that helped you through any predicament. Marta, Paños, Irene … Alexia … they were your motherly figures, the people you could always rely on to love you regardless of what else was happening in your life. Did they think you didn’t want to be there? Barcelona was the single most greatest thing that had ever happened to you.
You looked at the bag Alexia had shoved at you. It was full of healthy smoothies, nutritious snacks, and your favourite chocolates. You could even see a soft teddy instructing you to ‘Get Well Soon’. It made you sob even harder. Eventually, you moved to the sofa. Once you started crying, you couldn’t stop. You cried over everything – disappointing Alexia, having no hot water, being benched, your parents' dislike of you, your seeming lack of support system, how you appeared to fuck up the one good thing in your life. You cried yourself to sleep on the sofa, clutching the bag to your chest and feeling so incredibly sorry for both you and the girls you had failed.
The next morning, you looked horrific – puffy, red eyes, dishevelled hair, blotchy skin. You didn’t even try to hide it as you made your way to the bus stop, ignoring the weird looks thrown your way. You were in a daze as you walked through the metro system and onto the second bus, forgetting to hurry down the side alleys instead of the main road. You didn’t see Ingrid’s car as it drove past you, a concerned Mapi, Ingrid, Ona, and Lucy in it.
“Era que?” Mapi asked, pointing over her shoulder.
“Y/N? Sí, fue” Ona nodded.
“Why, though? She said she gets dropped off by her dad on his way to work.” Ingrid was just as perplexed. You seemed to know exactly where you were going and had stepped off the bus with an ease only known to someone who took the same route every day.
“Maybe it was a one-off? He couldn’t take her today, so she had to get the bus? Although I don’t know why she wouldn’t just ask one of us – she lives on most of our routes to work.” Lucy pondered, all of them confused over you.
“Hey,” Ingrid said as you walked into the changing rooms. You didn’t even smile at her, just nodding and moving to your cubby. “Um … so, how come you were on the bus?” You froze. How did she know you got the bus?
“It’s just that we saw you as we were driving in. If you needed a lift, you could’ve just asked; you know we’d all be more than happy to —” Ona explained.
“Yeh, my d-dad only told me this morning that he couldn’t take me the whole way, so … he dropped me off near the metro, and I just got the bus from there,” you lied, rushing to gather your boots and head to the pitch. It was a blatant lie. Your voice was too high, and your hands shook slightly as you tried to devise a realistic excuse.
“Todas sabemos que era una mentira, verdad?” Mapi looked around as the door swung shut.
The following month in training was awkward, to say the least. After your slip-up with the bus, you made sure to take the earlier trains, getting to training before most people had even left their beds. You figured you’d use the time to prove to Alexia and the others that you wanted to be there. You were still benched, but your name was still on the game day sheet, so you liked to believe they weren’t thinking of selling you or cancelling your contract after the season ended. The issue was getting home. If you stayed late, you were often questioned, but if you were seen walking out of the car park, you were also questioned. You really needed to learn how to drive ... quickly.
Eventually, Jona could no longer justify you sitting on the bench. Barca had the Champions League semi-finals coming up, and everyone noted your absence on the pitch.
“Y/N, you will be playing the next match. You’re going to be a sub around 60 or 70 minutes.” It was a short announcement, but you couldn’t help your heart soar. Did this mean they finally believed you when you said that Barca was the best thing that happened to you? Alexia still hadn’t looked at you since That Day, but she was no longer actively seething, which you took as a win. But now you would be playing in the home leg of the Champions League semi-finals. You were nervous, but not because of the match; you were on a 0 – 3 aggregate, and you were going to be playing at Camp Nou – it was an almost guaranteed win –but because you knew the team would be more suspicious of your lack of parents.
You decided to do what you always did – never look to the crowd, do a lap of the stadium for the fans, hurry back into the changing rooms, and slip away. Simple. Easy. You had been doing it all your life. But you hadn’t accounted for how attentive the team would be. They watched you wearily from a distance, concerned when you made no effort to look to the friends and family section during warm-ups or after the match when everyone usually went to see their loved ones. You stayed back, signing more things for fans, and then headed straight to the tunnel. After the celebration in the changing rooms, you gathered your things and disappeared before anyone could bring them up. You had mastered the art of vanishing like a ghost after matches.
But now it was the final. It was obviously an away game, but everyone’s family came. Even the coaching staff brought their loved ones. Not you, though. Your parents hadn’t known you’d left the country, let alone understood that you were playing in the most prestigious match in Europe for clubs. You were in the Starting XI, but you weren’t nervous. You knew you could win this match; this Champions title was yours for the taking. You didn’t realise that the fact that you had no family would be exposed the minute the final whistle went.
You played the full 90 minutes and an extra 5 for injury time. You were exhausted, but that didn’t matter as soon as the clock ran out. You had done it. Champions of Europe. The screams and shouts were so loud it hurt your ears, but you didn’t care. You felt unstoppable.
“Vamos, pequeña. Donde esta tu mamí? Quiero finalmente conocer a la mujer a la que debemos agradecer por regalarle al mundo contigo.” Mapi said as you sat on the grass, your medal around your neck.
“Más tarde. I just want to sit here and soak this all in.” You waved her away. She took you at your word but made meaningful eyes at Alexia, having an unspoken conversation as you moved away. Alexia watched as you leaned back, resting on your arms, legs outstretched, and eyes shut – head tilted to feel the sun on your skin. She waited for 10 minutes, watching you make no effort to see your family. It was the first thing she had done after the trophy celebration. She had run straight to her mother and sister, thanking them profusely for all their sacrifices and expressing so much gratitude towards them – throwing her sweaty body at them and tackling them into long, tight hugs.
“Do you want to see your family now?” It was the first non-football-related words she’d said to you in well over a month.
“No, I’m ok. I’ll see them later,” you dismissed her quickly.
“Do you know where they are? We could bring them down onto the pitch if you don’t want to stand up.” She wasn’t letting this go. She had an inkling that she hoped was wrong.
“It’s alright, Ale. Honestly. I’m fine sitting here, soaking this all up by myself.” You hadn’t opened your eyes, so you had assumed from the quietness she had moved away. “It’s not like you’d find them anyway,” you whispered as an unwanted tear escaped you.
“Qué quieres decir, cariño?” Your eyes snapped open, coming face to face with Alexia, Ona and Keira. You sat up, trying to hide your face.
“Oh, noth-”
“No me mientas. Dónde están tu mamí y papí?” Alexia asked sternly. You misunderstood her, thinking she was angry at you. You shook your head, refusing to answer.
“Neña, are your parents here?” Ona asked quietly, coming to sit next to you. You took a deep breath.
“No. They aren’t.”
“Do you want to phone them?” Keira suggested, hoping that it was just because they couldn’t take time away from work to attend in person. She also sat down, gesturing her phone to you as an invitation to use it. You took another deep breath.
“I don’t think they even know I had a football match, let alone a Champions League final.” Another tear slipped down your cheek. Alexia sat in front of you, reaching for your hands.
“Qué quieres decir?” She asked again, thumbs rubbing gently over the backs of your hands.
“My parents … I don’t really know how to say it,” you paused, Ona gently rubbing your back comfortingly. “My parents don’t really … parent?” You chuckled lightly.
“They don’t support you?” Keira asked, her hand resting on your knee.
“They don’t care enough. They leave for weeks on end without telling me. I get food and stuff like that on my own. I’m basically raising myself at this point. I don’t think they know I have a contract with Barca. I doubt they even know I play football. They just let me do whatever I wanted as long as I was out of the house, not causing trouble and quiet; they didn’t care. They’re lucky I haven’t turned into a criminal or something.” You tried to add a joke to lighten the mood.
“But you said you meet up with your parents after home matches,” Ona couldn’t imagine achieving half the things she did without her family supporting her from the sidelines.
“And you told us your dad drops you off every morning on the way to work,” Keira added, equally disbelieving – her parents were her biggest fans.
“Yeh, I lied. I just go home after matches. And I get the metro to training.”
“But training is nowhere near the metro, and you don’t live near a metro station either.” She still didn’t want to consider what you were saying to be true.
You explained, “I get a bus from mine to the metro and then a bus from the metro to training.”
“That’s why you were getting off the bus that day when we saw you,” Ona realised. She hadn’t trusted your story but had considered no other possibilities.
“That’s why you're late to training sometimes? Because of the buses and trains?” Alexia asked, her hands never leaving yours.
“Yeh.” You looked down, ashamed of your situation and lying to them.
“And that day when you missed training. You weren’t sick. What happened?”
“I … um … the boiler broke, so I had to wait for someone to come fix it. Which they never did, by the way. I had to phone some random company that massively overcharged me, and the water definitely doesn’t get as hot as it used to.” You babbled nervously. “It wasn’t because I don’t want to be at Barca. It’s the only thing that keeps me going, knowing that I have you guys looking out for me. It makes everything else seem not as bad,” you whispered, needing them to know just how important Barca was to you. You looked around. Patri and Pina tried to do the perfect chest bump as Jana and Bruna filmed. Lucy was chasing her niece and nephew. Ingrid and Mapi were with Ingrid’s parents, smiling widely as they talked. Marta and Caro were sat off to one side, talking quietly. You could see the others dotted around the stadium, talking to fans, speaking to parents, and enjoying the support.
“Cariño, I am so sorry,” Alexia implored. I shouted at you and benched you. I’m sorry I made you think I didn’t believe you took Barca seriously.”
“Why didn’t you tell us, neña?” Ona asked.
“We only want what’s best for you, kid,” Keira added.
“Um … I don’t really know. It doesn’t really matter. It’s been like this my whole life, so…”
“Cariño. It does matter. But we know now, and that’s all that matters, sí?” Alexia stood up, dragging you with her. “Let’s go see my family. Mi Mamí has been asking to meet you for ages. And before you say no, she already has plans for you to come round for dinner one night. Y en secreto, ella siempre quiso una tercera hija.” She said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as Ona took your hand.
“Oh, Eli will have to fight my Mama on that one, Ale. She always wanted a goal-scoring daughter.”
“Well, my mum says you are more than welcome to stay at her house if you ever visit the UK as long as you cook her paella.” Keira smiled.
Maybe your biological family was shite, but your found one certainly wasn't.
I hope you liked it <3
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Text
Sting - LN
Summary: Rejection isn't something Lando is unfamiliar with in his love life and while it's never nice. This time it really stings and she's harder to let go than any other girl who has turned him away, maybe because she doesn't sound so sure about rejecting him.
Aston Martin employee!reader
Themes: smut
No part 2 requests please
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"I'm really flattered, but I think it's a bad idea." Y/n smiles trying to make it so it's not awkward but it's really hard to reject someone who just asked you out and it not be awkward. "I'm sorry, Lando."
Truth be told the two have got really close. Y/n is Aston Martin's social media manager, though Fernando handles a lot of it himself. She sort of aids him through any confusion and Lance prefers not to be involved in it a lot so she handles all his accounts, though he can log in and do stuff himself. She has access to all the team and driver social media accounts.
But her and Lando befriended each other purely through continuously being around each other and Lando having grown an obvious crush.
"Why is it a bad idea?" Lando asks trying not to lose his confidence.
"I think we're just really good as friends." Y/n states looking as if she's trying to keep up a positive front. Though she quickly softens a little and speaks up again. "You're a great guy. But I'm just not at a point in my life that I want to be dating anyone. I'm so...focused on my job and I think right now, I would say no to anyone."
"So you're saying it's not me it's you?" Lando surmises making earn nod a little, the guilt on her expression beginning to get hard to hide. "Don't feel bad."
"Never feels great rejecting someone." Y/n mumbles before Fernando appears shouting her name. "I have to go. That's his I have the most marvellous idea and need your help call."
"Good luck." Lando nods then turning and sighing as he heads into the McLaren unit straight towards his drivers room where Jon is standing setting up some warm up stuff.
"You don't look happy." Jon comments making her look at him for a moment. "Y/n say no?"
"Exactly that." Lando grumbles then growing as he throws himself onto the physio bed. "She said she's not in the right place for a relationship and is focusing on her job...which I can't actually argue with. But I'm still not really happy about it."
"You know-"
"I know." Lando mutters, not actually knowing but not really wanting to be told something about the situation. He's not happy, but he can't be angry about it either. "It just stings."
And it does, there was something about being friend zoned that really hurt this time. It's not as if he's never been rejected before, hell despite his popularity he's found himself the victim of so many friend zones that he has lost count. Embarrassingly.
It never feels particularly good, but this time really stings.
Maybe it's because they are friends and they have to see each other and he really doesn't want to lose her as a friend. The problem is that he wants her as much more than a friend.
-
Y/n and Lando continued to be friends, to spend time together and to have the amazing back and forth of flirting.
"You know, it is a shame that y/n can't date you." Fernando comments as they walk around the paddock. Y/n not there with the older driver for once. "The two of you get along so well, when she told me why she said no I couldn't believe it."
"What do you mean?" Lando frowns not thinking her reason was all that unbelievable. She's prioritising her job. What about that is so shocking?
"Well Lawrence saying she can date within the team but no one from another team. It seems a little bit far fetch to demand. Her love life is not his business or even team business, no?" Fernando questions making Lando's face drop.
"Lawrence? Like Lawrence Stroll?"
"The owner of the team, yes. He has it written in everyone's contract. He even got reports about her getting close to you, took her in for a meeting and she left practically in tears. I had to get her flowers to help her feel better." Fernando states sounding almost fatherly towards the young woman as he speaks in disapproval of it all.
Lando actually feels like he's just been punched in the gut with this information.
Why didn't she tell him?
Maybe because he almost certainly would've said they can hide it. He would've tried to talk her into a plan of just keeping it secret. After all they're friends, so long as they keep the PDA to what it is now then there's no real risk.
"I know she did not tell you about the contract clause. But I think you should know. Maybe you can do something about it." Fernando explains, essentially admitting he informed Lando with an ulterior motive that was not as innocent as Lando had initially assumed.
-
It took some poking at Fernando, but Lando got her hotel room from the Spaniard.
So later he shows up knocking on her door with no relenting even when there's no answer. Mainly because he messaged her about an hour ago and knows she's there.
The door swings open and she is glaring at him, holding a towel tightly around her wet body which honestly stirs something in Lando that he wasn't expecting to be forced to deal with upon coming to see her.
"I-Lando, what are you doing here?" Y/n stutters out, pulling her towel tighter around herself.
"We need to talk."
"Now?" Y/n frowns almost feeling helpless about it.
"Yes. Now."
Y/n looks around before stepping aside and gesturing for Lando to come in, which he does before she closes the door.
"So what is so important that you couldn't wait and had to smash on my door loud enough for a noise complaint?" Y/n questions trying to figure if she wants to put clothes on while Lando tries to keep his hands from pulling that towel off.
"You didn't tell me it was in your contract that you can't date me."
"Well it's not you specifically." Y/n frowns earning a slightly look of annoyance. "It doesn't matter if you know or not. It's not going to change anything."
Y/n looks at Lando who seems to be visibly with the cogs turning in his head. The man couldn't hide an emotion on his face if he tried and right now, he's thinking.
"Ok, while you process. Can I put some clothes on?"
"I'd really rather you didn't." Lando shrugs making her sigh at him and adjust her towel again. "We could just not tell people."
"You realise I would lose my job." Y/n frowns while Lando frowns.
"I'll get you a new job. The same job but on a better team." Lando tries making her look at him in slightly amusement. "Don't give me that look."
"What look?"
"Like I'm coming up with some childish fantasy."
"That is exactly what you're doing. I don't know what you expect me to do when that is genuinely what's happening here." Y/n states with a shrug as Lando steps towards her. "Lando...don't do something we'll regret."
"Will you regret it?"
"If it costs me my job then yes."
"But we're not dating...or is it that you can't have sex with anyone from another team too?'
"You're trying to get into the fine print?"
"Depends what the fine print says."
"I can't have relations with anyone from another team. So actually yes, I'm not allowed to have sex with you either."
Lando hums biting his lip lightly as he looks at her for a moment and she tries not to ruin her freshly showered state by sweating as his hand comes up and tugs the damp towel away.
Once glimpse at her body had his head dropping back with a groan echoing through his throat.
"Fucking hell, y/n. You can't force me to leave, please don't make me leave."
Y/n isn't usually so eager to just give herself to a man who she has yet to even kiss, especially after having rejected him so recently but she doesn't say anything.
Lando's hand moves down her waist, stroking her exposed skin while she swallows thickly. She's already decided his touch feels far too good for her to move away from it or say she doesn't want this.
"Want me to stop?"
"No." Y/n mumbles and that's all Lando needs.
Hands on her waist as he pushed her back till her knees hit the edge of the bed and she falls back onto the soft surface.
"Are you sure you want this?" Lando asks stopping and giving her the opportunity to back out. He might be feeling like he'll die if he doesn't get to at least touch every inch of her body. But he's not about to do something that she'll hate both himself and herself for.
"Yes. Don't make me overthink this." Y/n mumbles and Lando really doesn't have to be told twice.
There's something about the situation that stops him from going completely feral on the young woman. Instead he's going to really take his time.
Lando has no problem just looking at her, keeping his gaze fixed on her before he leans over and gets to do the one thing that he's been waiting to do for far too long.
Just fucking kiss the girl.
She tastes like mint, presumably having brushed her teeth before or after the shower.
But he moves his lips down her body, leaving a trail over marks on her skin, his teeth nip as he shamelessly leaves love bites as evidence he was there. He doesn't care how childish might be. He's giving her a memory of this moment that goes beyond right now.
All he can hear is her almost panting and when he is low enough that he throws her legs over his shoulders and uses the position to push her further up the bed for a better angle and access to her.
"Lando." Y/n whimpers just feeling him spread her lips and his breath hitting her pussy which is admittedly still wet from her shower really, but he can see her quivering and the sound of his name from her voice is enough for him to know it's pleasure that he's causing.
"Tell me what you want." Lando instructs feeling her thigh tense to fight the urge of closing and bringing herself some sort of relief.
"You. I want your mouth on me giving me the best head I've ever got." Y/n states not even hesitating and Lando almost wants to applaud her for how impressed he is she actually answered and did not stutter meaning no area of confusion.
He knows exactly what she wants from him and he's more than happy to deliver on it.
"Lando please."
He didn't actually mean to hesitate to the point of hearing her beg, but it certainly isn't an unwelcome sound. But he doesn't waste anymore time and dives in between her legs properly lapping his tongue and groaning at the fact that she might've just showered but there's a slick there telling him that if he had any doubt of her being turned on. He doesn't need to doubt it from the taste of her on his tongue.
Y/n feels so completely desperate for Lando, she didn't realise how immediately addictive his touch would be.
"F-Fuck, L-Lando." Y/n moans, pressing herself heavily into the bed beneath her.
Her hand reaches down to his hair, tugs on his scalp pulling him closer much to his delight. He's face is smothered in her and he's feeling the side of him that wanted to drag this experience out suddenly disappear as soon as he feels her twitching in a build up and then completely spasming on his tongue. Her thighs locking on his head trying to contain herself as she almost tries to move away from him as if the sensation is all too much, but he keeps his hands on her thighs stopping her from getting anywhere till he's made sure she's rode out this orgasm for as long as possible.
Actually to his surprise, despite him making no effort to let up as she moans and moves her hands to the sheets trying to ground herself from the overstimulation.
When he finally moves off there's a matter of seconds which is him, his body drags up against her with the perfect amount of pressure on her that she's grappling for him.
"What do you want?" Lando asks, breath hot and his face wet. His lips look almost swollen and his face is flushed. She can't even stop herself from reach a hand to his face for a moment both of them slightly breathless.
"I want you, inside me. Right now. Please." Y/n pants which is all Lando needs to reach down, gently pushing the tip in before moving his hand to hook a hand under her knee, pushing her leg back for a better angle which is very much perfectly effective.
Lando almost chokes on his spit from the feeling of her wrapped around him. The idea of holding back on her crosses his mind, but that's all it does and then it disappears along with any sense of self-control.
He's only relieved to hear y/n whimpering and moaning through every thrust which is almost a no mercy approach from Lando, just pounding into her not able to even entertain the idea of slowing down. He already knows he abusing her g-spot from the 2nd or 3rd thirst thanks to her reaction and when he reaches down to pinch at her clit.
Y/n practically cries from the additional stimulation. Her nerves short-circuiting from such attention. He's touching her like he owns her body and knows it's every secret that even she had yet to make use of.
He feels her start to quiver around him, fighting off a second orgasm but it doesn't last long as she completely tightens around him, still trying to deny herself the high that her body is on the verge of being pushed over the edge of.
"Let it go, baby." Lando states with a voice so heavy in lust that it completely pours over her like he's setting out to melted her. She's arched up against him and clenched down around him. Her spasming around him in such a way that Lando is locked in her as he cums, both in a shared world of bliss.
Y/n's body takes it's time to actually relax while Lando keeps himself pressed as deep in her as possible, his face in her neck.
"Ok...Ok, maybe...maybe we could try keeping this hidden...just until I find another job that doesn't contractual obligate me to not date someone from another team." Y/n pants running a hand up through his hair as she tries to catch her breath and actually stop seeing start. "So long as you promise to do that again."
"I'll do that and more." Lando grunts pulling out and sighing as he looks at her from the shifted back position. "That's a promise."
"Good." Y/n smiles before he kisses her a couple times.
"I think you might need another shower."
"I'll do it in a bit...I still need just...a bit of recovery time." Y/n yawns almost feeling like falling asleep from the amount of energy that just completely burn through any energy she had. "Actually I might need food, water and a nap before I even consider getting up."
Lando smiles kissing her again, now loving to abuse this new privilege.
"I'll take care of you." Lando smiles then getting up while she frowns.
"What are you doing?" Y/n questions making him grin leaning back over her for another kiss. "Ok, that's lovely but not an answer."
"Don't move." Lando grins then pushing her back onto the bed. "I'm good at both orgasms and aftercare."
Y/n sighs taking a moment to realise this man really just turned her world upside down. But to her surprise it's in the best way. Even if Fernando is about to throttle Lawrence for the contract clause that is going to lead to her inevitable departure from Aston Martin just so she can pursue a relationship with Lando.
But there's pretty good reason (good sex) with a man who has very apparently made his point that he isn't wavering on his feelings for her.
Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos @llando4norris @partyinpitlane @lpab @xoscar03 @harrysdimple05 @mellowarcadefun @cixrosie @scopeiguess @racingheartsposts @c-losur3
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folkwhoredoll · 2 days
Text
yacht escapades - rafe cameron x fem!reader
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pairing: rafe cameron x fem!reader
synopsis: sneaking away with your boyfriend leads to a salacious session under the moonlight
word count: 2k
warnings/tags: smut! (unprotected sex, f and m oral, fingering, brief cockwarming), sweet boyfriend!rafe
a/n: hi everyone! thank you so so much for everyone's support on my recent works. seeing all your hearts and reblogs always makes my day :3 i've always wanted to write a smutfic for rafe so here it is. i hope you'll like this one. happy reading!
masterlist
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“Relax, baby. This is literally my family’s yacht. Technically, it’s mine too so don’t worry.” Rafe assured you for the hundredth time, rotating the helm of the boat to move farther away from the dock.
Your boyfriend has always been unpredictable, so when he slowly woke you up half an hour ago because he couldn’t sleep, you had no idea that you two would end up sneaking away his parents’ yacht at three in the morning. A part of you was nervous, knowing that Ward tends to get pissed over the littlest things that Rafe did. But another voice was lulling you to just enjoy the night breeze.
“I know, I know. But what if—” You blabbed.
“Stop, sweetheart. We won’t even go that far.”
You sighed, walking over behind Rafe to wrap your arms around his waist while he continued to maneuver the boat far enough to isolate the two of you from the island.
“See? Isn’t this nice?” He smiled proudly, holding your hand to take you to the couch, easily pulling you to his lap.
Your breathing was quiet, hands firm on top of Rafe’s wrapped arms on your waist. He was occasionally giving you some soft kisses on the forehead and cheeks when you broke the silence. “So how exactly is this going to help you sleep?”
“It probably won’t.” He answered bluntly.
You chuckled, watching over the soft ripples on the surface of the lake.
You were on the verge of falling asleep on Rafe’s lap when you felt one of his hands move from your waist to your right thigh, thumb softly rubbing the skin. You didn’t think much of it and let out a small yawn, but he moved his hand further up, making you roll your eyes.
“Hey.”
“What?” Rafe replied innocently, pressing a soft kiss on the side of your neck.
“I know what you’re doing.” You huffed. Sitting up straight but still not leaving his lap. “Did you just bring me here for sex?”
Rafe let out a fake gasp, but his eyes shone with mischief. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You know, we could’ve just done it in your bedroom.”
“Where’s the thrill in that?”
“So you admit! You just want sex.” You raised your brow.
“Well, yes and no. I really couldn’t sleep but now you just look so pretty and we’re all alone here.” He said, tugging the bottom of your shirt.
You groaned, not that you were annoyed with him. You’re annoyed with yourself for liking the idea. It is no secret that you and Rafe have always been sexually active, always trying out new things that one of you may be curious about. Your sex drive matches with his, and it is one of the things that you two love about each other. So the thought of giving yourself to your boyfriend in the middle of the night underneath the stars tempted you so much. And you shamelessly fell for it.
You looked down at his groin, already noticing the bulge through his khaki shorts despite the slight darkness. You pressed your hands against him and gave it a hard squeeze, surprising Rafe.
“Fuck, baby.” He gasped, hips raising upwards slightly.
“You want me, Rafey?” You whispered, giving him the most innocent look you can muster. But Rafe can see right through you, knowing that your question was all he needed as a signal to make a move.
Rafe didn’t answer. Instead, he grabbed the back of your neck and pulled your face towards him, kissing you roughly. His tongue glided over your lower lip, making you open your mouth to let him in. Without breaking contact, you fully turned your body to face his, grinding slightly while tangling your fingers in his hair.
He put both of his hands on your hips, heavy breaths occasionally leaving his lips but never breaking the kiss. It was you who pulled away first after a while, gasping for air but wasting no time unbuttoning his shorts.
“Eager, are we?” He smirked, lips red from kissing you.
“Shut up.” You replied, hurrying to pull out his huge manhood as you positioned yourself from his lap to kneel on the floor.
“Go ahead, baby. Suck my cock off like a good girl.” He cooed, stroking the top of your head.
You gave him a sweet smile before giving his tip a lick, making sure to never break eye contact. Rafe threw his head back, whispering a curse under his breath. You grinned at his reaction, ego growing higher as you wrapped your lips around his head.
Rafe almost thanked the sky above for your mouth. He has always been proud of having you. A smart, rich, and polite girl; a literal angel, as others have said. But they don’t know what kind of a freak you are behind those innocent dresses and wide eyes. None of them know except Rafe, and he intends to keep it that way.
You kept sucking him off, pushing yourself to take in as much as you can even as tears brimmed your eyes. You wrapped your slender fingers around the area that you couldn’t take, loving the way he tasted.
Rafe’s head was pulled backward, his chest rising and falling heavily while he muttered praises and curses. He was on the verge of his release when he suddenly put both of his hands on your shoulder.
“No, I want to cum in your pussy.” He panted, pulling you up by the arms. He gently pushed you against the couch so that you were now the one sitting. He stood up and hurriedly removed his clothes, your eyes in awe while watching him. “Like what you see, baby?”
You grinned, pulling your shirt upwards, and expertly removed the clasp of your bra. Rafe’s eyes were trained on your breasts as soon as you freed them, but he wasted no time removing your shorts and panties at the same time.
“Fuck. There’s my pretty pussy.” His eyes were steadily trained on your cunt as he leaned down at eye level. It was as if he was hypnotized as he brought one hand to your folds, gliding his forefinger up and down. He smirked when he noticed the thin sheer wetness in the middle.
“Rafey…” You whined.
“What is it, sweetheart?”
“Fuck me already.”
“You’re a bossy girl, aren’t you?” Rafe chuckled amusedly. “Patience, darling. ‘Gotta prepare you nicely first.”
He continued to tease you, never touching your clit or pushing a finger inside of you. With each moment that you grow irritated, the wetness of your womanhood increases. When Rafe sensed that you were about to curse him off, he suddenly inserted two fingers in, making you gasp.
“Shit.” You breathed, soft moans leaving your lips as he curled his fingers before pumping faster.
Rafe placed his thumb on your clit, making you squeal in both surprise and pleasure. You swore you almost saw stars when he did so, one hand reaching downwards in an attempt to grab onto the couch for support while the other reached for his wrist.
He ticked his tongue at the action, using his free hand to pull your hand away.
Rafe lowered his head until your legs were leveled with his face, inhaling your scent while still fingering you. He brought his lips closer until you could feel his breath near your folds, making you shiver.
“Rafe, please fuck me… fuck.” You pleaded.
“I will, darling. But I have to taste this pussy first.” Without warning, he removed his thumb from your clit, replacing it with his lips. You screamed at the contact, suddenly thankful that no one could hear you.
Rafe continued to play with your clit, tugging the small nub with his teeth while pushing his tongue inside you. You were almost crying from pleasure, the overwhelming feeling of your boyfriend’s mouth and fingers in the same area was almost too much.
You were loudly moaning his name, hips lifting on their own as you pushed yourself closer to Rafe’s mouth. Your boyfriend grinned against you, his pride increasing with the knowledge that only he can make you feel this way.
You almost screamed in frustration when Rafe abruptly pulled away, licking his lips to savor your juices. “Ready, baby?”
“Yes, Rafe, fuck me please.”
“Always so polite.” He snickered, loving the way that your eyes turned hazy from all the pleasure. “Who am I to turn down my baby’s request, hm?”
With a swift move, Rafe quickly positioned his cock to align with your cunt before pushing himself in with one go. You gasp at the intrusion, shock, and ecstasy filling your body. Having sex with Rafe so many times has made you familiar with his size, but you still weren’t prepared for the amount of stretching that your womanhood would have to make to accommodate him.
He wasted no time and began thrusting, slowly at first to let you adjust.
“Shit. Your cunt is hugging me perfectly.” He gasped, building up his tempo.
You were too speechless to reply, the only thing that you could do was moan and grab his chest. Rafe placed one hand on your hip, and the other grabbed both your wrists to pull your hands above your head.
Sweats, gasps, and whines were the only sounds heard. Rafe’s hips collided with yours with strength, making you scream out his name. He admired the beads of sweat on your forehead, your skin illuminated by the moonlight. He always believed that you were the prettiest girl on this planet. And seeing you at this moment, naked and dewy with your face twisted in enjoyment, he knew he was right.
“Come on, darling. Give it to me.” He praised, knowing that you were close with how tightly you were squeezing him.
You mumbled his name over and over again, legs shaking as you wrapped them around his hips to pull him closer. Rafe cursed after seeing your action, thrusting harder and faster to chase both of your highs.
You were a crying mess underneath him, pleasure surging through all parts of your body. You opened your eyes slightly, admiring Rafe’s face before feeling the pressure on your lower abdomen.
“Fuck, Rafe. I’m gonna cum.”
“Go ahead, sweet girl. Cum for me. I want to feel you around my cock.” He urged, never breaking the pattern of his thrusts.
You screamed after a few more pushes, your vision blurring slightly as you squirted around him. Rafe came after you, gasping as he felt his warm liquid mix with your own inside your pussy.
You two were panting against each other, Rafe still inside you as he caught his breath. “You alright?” He asked, pushing a strand of hair away from your face.
You couldn’t reply, still breathing heavily but nodded instead. Rafe started to slowly pull out of you, making you whine.
“No, Rafey. Stay.” You pouted.
He smiled sweetly, lifting you so that he could sit on the couch without separating from you.
The two of you lay there, soft breaths coming out of your mouths while Rafe hugged you against his chest as you keep him warm in your cunt.
“Tired, baby?” He asked you after a while, noticing your droopy eyes.
You nodded, feeling warm against his body despite being exposed to cool air.
“Get some rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Rafe whispered, kissing you softly on the forehead.
Before closing your eyes, you vowed to sneak out with his yacht more open.
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inkskinned · 9 hours
Text
you found out today that a phrase you have used before was coined by an abusive man. this felt like getting your teeth taken out. it made you sick and sad and tired, but not surprised.
bad people tell you to be careful when you talk badly of bad men, that it could "ruin" a life. you had your life ruined by a bad man, not that it ever matters to them. your real life having real consequences is not valued as highly as the potential of his future.
this has always been a frustrating little mathematics problem for you. you've missed school and had to call out sick at work and had panic attacks that lasted for weeks. it stole sleep and food and friends from you. you cried in public, fucked your relationships up. and the whole time: your present has never mattered so much as the great what if! of his future. like - one life (your life) is already ruined, should we really ruin two?
so you live with the consequences and he doesn't, and that's just like, something you need therapy for. you once discussed this with one of your friends over coffee. she chewed the wooden stirrer, looked off into the distance. "once i became a victim, everything that happens to me afterward is automatically less interesting in the eyes of the general public. it is always about him. he changed my identity. to survivor. to statistic. meanwhile this whole time - i am a person."
you learned in college that three out of five of your favorite artists and authors were actually abusive assholes. these days, you are no longer surprised. oh, is that what was happening behind closed doors? of course it was, he was a "genius," and she was just a girl. you are talking about him in art history, so obviously his career was absolutely ruined, for eternity. that's what happens, right? they strike your name from the record and refuse to remember you? nobody really knows her name, but hey. that's what you get for being close to celebrity.
you got into an argument about it, which was a bad argument, because it made you cry. he said what, you want us to just ignore all the things this man did because he made a few women uncomfortable? and you'd balled your fists up and choked on it. later, in bed, you agonized over the response you'd been trying to articulate but never found the right moment to deploy: you are ignoring what any person could do if they weren't being fucking abused. maybe her talents far exceeded his and she was just never allowed to fucking use them. maybe we only see genius in white men because they purposefully fucking squash and silence any other people with talent.
but you'd cried about it instead of saying that, because you are the cost. you are the talent and potential that he took. you used to be brave and smart and clever and unafraid. like a lich, he stole years of your life.
quiet on set made you sad and sick and tired, but not surprised. unfortunately, one of the things he said was true: an entire network of people allowed it to continue. this is not news to you, because you have seen entire networks of people make the same fucking excuses when the same thing or-worse happened to you. and your particular story isn't even in hollywood. it was just a guy. it was still difficult getting people to stand up for you.
you and your friend wait in line for your coffee. like a standup joke, one man turns to the other and says "can't wait for every bitch to come crawling out of the woodwork complaining about harassment. it's another metoo." and you think - oh, that's the network. your boss tucks her hair back and whispers that while your skirt is cute, you're giving the boys the wrong idea. that's the network. when you'd told your "friend" about what happened, she'd said oh you must have misunderstood, that would never happen. and that's the network.
you woke up this morning panting, because years later you still have panic attacks. oh, it's not a network, actually, it's a web. and you, little moth: are you still surprised you're caught in it?
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wosounited · 2 days
Note
Hey,
I like when reader is hiding relationship with Leah from her sister. And it gets really angsty but in the end they work it out.
Maybe you could write something like that
You Weren’t Meant to be Home (Leah Williamson x Walsh!Reader)
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Leah had a reputation, one that she was proud of and done hard to maintain. Since her last relationship had crashed and burned, she’d been doing anything and everything to not get attached and tied down to someone again. The dynamics were working for her. She lived alone and didn’t have to answer to anyone about the amount of girls that had slipped in and out of her sheets on a weekly basis.
Since her ACL injury, she’d been partying a lot more, to get over the pain of missing the Champions League and more importantly, the World Cup. Usually, it would be with her best mate Alex at a boojie event that Alex had brought her as a plus one. Her partying antics followed her all the way to Australia at the World Cup, when she’d eventually flown over.
You’d been there all Summer, travelling around the country but getting back in time to watch your sister play. You weren’t a big football fan, but your sister playing in a World Cup was more than enough of an excuse to travel to Australia. It was all you and your best friend, Amy, had dreamed of for years, so this was your chance. Amy also wasn’t an overly big football fan, much to the annoyance of your older sister.
“So, you guys haven’t lost yet?” Amy asked Keira and Georgia, while the four of you were on a walk, soaking up the sun while they had some downtime.
“Do you not understand how the World Cup works?” Keira frowned.
“We do” you giggled, shushing Amy’s laughter down. “We totally get it, it’s just we’re a bit preoccupied doing Australian things” you shrugged.
“Australian girls?” Georgia laughed as Keira punched her into the arm.
“That’s my sister!” Keira snapped.
“It’s not me doing your sister” Georgia protested, holding her hands up in surrender.
“God, can we please change the conversation?” you groaned at the current topic of conversation with your sister being your sex life.
You continued on your walk, back towards the team hotel to drop Keira and Georgia off. Amy and Keira were just ahead, laughing about a story Amy was telling her from someone back at home she had recently had a brief fling with.
“Has there been many?” Georgia smirked, wriggling her eyebrows at you, as you rolled your eyes. “Come on, I won’t tell Kei”
“Maybe four or five?” You guessed, not fully remembering the exact number of girls you’d been with since you got here.
“This is why I always said I felt like we were destined to be friends, instead of me and Kei” Georgia laughed, wrapping her arm around your shoulder.
“Yeah, yeah G” you squeezed her arm. “Leah’s coming soon, isn’t she? You both excited to see her?” You smiled as Georgia nodded frantically.
You didn’t really know Leah that well. She was your sister’s best friend, but she wasn’t as friendly or approachable as Georgia was. You knew Georgia a lot better due to her and Keira playing together in Manchester for a long time. The only thing you knew about Leah from all the times you’d met her or went out with her was, she was stone cold to you. She’d barely even acknowledge you were in the room as her.
You hugged the two of them goodbye when you got to the team hotel and headed off back to your own, to get ready for the shenanigans you and Amy were set to get up to tonight.
You’d seen pretty much everywhere you wanted to at this stage in Australia, making memories to last a life time. You were staying in Sydney for the remainder of the trip, and were on your best behaviour due to being in the same place as your parents.
“Please” Amy begged when you said you weren’t going out tonight.
“My head hasn’t even recovered fully from last night” you groaned. You found it funny your sister was here to be an elite athlete, playing in the biggest tournament possible. While you were here to see how drunk you could get. You were both achieving great things in your field.
“The best way to get over a hangover is to drink more” Amy shouted, throwing nice clothes at you from your wardrobe. You eventually agreed and headed out to a nightclub that had been heavily recommended by some Australians that were staying in your hotel. The same group that were currently in the night club beckoning the two of you over to join them on the dance floor.
Amy was off to the side of the group with one of the boys, while you were happily drunk dancing with the remainder of the group. You’d excused yourself to grab a drink for you and another girl, before quickly rejoining them. You’d been dancing with this girl all night really, presuming things were getting a bit flirty. She’d just turned off to start talking to a guy that approached her as you internally groaned, and took a bit sip of your drink.
“You look so good tonight, baby” another guy in the group mumbled as his hands met your waist and he pulled you towards him.
“You’re alright, thank you” you shook your head as you tried to pierce his hands off you. “Can you let go, please?” You asked.
“Come on, do you not want a bit of fun?” He smirked.
“I’m not into guys” you squeezed his hand to try and get him off, but he was persistent.
“I could change that” he grinned, pulling you against him impossibly closer. It was there and then that your heart sunk. You were defenceless and nobody from the group seemed to be watching.
“Y/n?” You heard an angel like voice shout, as you looked up to see Leah. She mightn’t have known you overly well, but it was evident you didn’t want whatever he was trying. “You alright babe?” Leah asked, putting her hand out, which you took without flinching or hesitating for even a split second.
“No” you shook your head.
“Mate, let fucking go” Leah grunted as he freed his grip slightly. Leah found it to be her obligation right now to keep you safe as Keira’s best friend, and was willing to do anything possible to protect you. “That’s my girlfriend” she shouted as he fully let go and pushed you away from him.
“Sorry mate, didn’t know she was with you” he put his hands up apologetically, apologising to Leah more so than you.
“Thank you” you whispered as she pulled you against her by your waist, still playing the part. You didn’t really care that she had her hands on you, even if it was a similar grip than what he had.
“You alright? Are you here with someone?” She asked.
“Amy” you pointed at your friend, still with the nicer boy in the group. “I really appreciate that, girlfriend” you smirked as she reciprocated your facial expression.
“Why don’t you kiss me? Make it more believable?” Leah winked with a cheeky laugh.
“Come on Captain Williamson, I’ll get you a drink” you smiled, pulling her by the hand towards the bar. “Who are you here with?” You asked.
“Alex, Jill, you know” she pointed over to the group of ex footballers that were also at the nightclub. Although, the section they were in looked a lot more exclusive.
“I’ll leave you to it, thanks again” you smiled, turning hesitantly to walk back towards the group you’d been dancing with.
“Don’t be stupid” Leah shouted, grabbing your wrist. “I don’t want you going back over anywhere near him” she frowned. “Stay with me” she whispered softly as you nodded at her, and let her guide you towards her friends, now interlocking your fingers and pulling you gently towards them.
You knew most of the girls and they at least knew of you from Keira. They were all really friendly, and made sure to keep good drinks and vibes going throughout the night. Around 1am, when Amy had finally removed herself from the Australian boy she had been literally clung to all night, she skipped over to let you know she was leaving with him.
“Give me your phone” you clicked your fingers at her as she willingly handed it over without hesitation. You made sure every app that you could see her location was turned on before handing it back to her.
“Have fun” you smirked as she kissed your cheek with a giggle.
“I’ll make sure she gets home alright” Leah inputted, sliding up beside you on the couch you were sitting on, placing a protective hand on your knee.
“Oh thank you, almighty Leah Williamson” Amy teased, making a bowing motion before she left with the boy.
“Do you wanna dance?” Leah whispered in your ear.
“Yeah” you smiled as you both got up and headed to the dancefloor.
Leah was getting a bit touchy but you didn’t really care, because you were too. You were also both incredibly drunk, which probably wasn’t helping.
“I wasn’t joking before, you should kiss me” Leah slurred, beyond the point of drunk now to be embarrassed of what she was saying.
“I thought you hated me” you laughed as she frowned and shook her head. “What would we tell Keira?” You asked as her eyes fell to your lips.
“Nothing” she mumbled before she leaned in and kissed you. You kissed her back instantly, immediately switching the intensity of the kiss. It was a bad idea, such a bad idea. But her lips felt so good against yours, and you just couldn’t help it. “Did Amy take your hotel room then?” Leah asked as you shook your head. You had two bedrooms in the apartment anyway, incase of moments like these.
“Do you want to come back?” You asked as she nodded at you, eagerly, before kissing you again.
It was a few minutes after when you’d broken apart and she gestured you towards the door, while she headed in the opposite direction to get both of your stuff from the seats.
“I’m going to walk y/n back to her hotel” Leah shouted over the music at Alex.
“In other words, you’re going to fuck your best mates sister?” Alex laughed. “I saw you two” she added. Thankfully, nobody else had.
“You’re my best mate” Leah tried talking herself out of it.
“Leah” Alex raised her eyebrows, not falling for Leah’s bullshit.
“What? That’s not Keira’s sister, that’s her twin” Leah smirked, thinking she’d talked herself out of it this time.
“Okay? That would still make that girl Keira’s sister” Alex chuckled as Leah rolled her eyes. “You’re sure you know what you’re doing? You’re not going to wake up tomorrow and feel bad?” Alex asked as Leah looked back at you, standing waiting for her by the door.
“I’m sure” she nodded as Alex patted her shoulder.
It was different with her on the walk back, it was comfortable, almost like it was a regular occurrence. But when you got back to your hotel room, you continued where you left off at the nightclub.
Leah was by far the best you’d ever had. It wasn’t even close. But the guilt that ripped through you when you came to your senses, made you realise it wasn’t worth it. Well, you tried to make yourself believe it wasn’t worth it.
“Keira can never, ever know” you hummed and shook your head, while the blonde nodded in agreement. A similar guilty expression was evident on her face too now that she’d sobered up.
“You know, I’ve actually really liked you for a long time” Leah was a straight forward person, and was used to getting what she wanted.
“You need to work on your flirting skills then, because I always presumed you hated me” you shrugged, thinking it was just a line she was using.
“Well, I knew you’d never want to be with me because of Keira” Leah mumbled, and you knew by her expression she was being sincere.
“Well, you thought wrong” you shrugged. “I don’t want you to go tonight” you whispered as she smiled back at you.
“Then I won’t go” she said, shuffling back towards you in the bed. She pulled you in against her as you both drifted off really quickly.
When you woke the next morning, Leah wasn’t in the bed beside you, which wasn’t a surprise. The amount of girls you’d been with that would tell you everything you wanted to hear to sleep with you and then be gone before you woke. They just didn’t know that it was the last thing you wanted to hear, you weren’t looking for a commitment. At least you thought you weren’t, until Leah strutted back into the bedroom.
“Oh, you’re awake” she smiled. Holding a mug in one hand and a sudoku book in the other. A book that must have belonged to Amy and she’d rooted it out from God know’s where.
“You’re still here?” You asked, with a small uptick of your lips.
“Is that alright?”
“As long as you’re coming back to bed” you smirked as she placed her mug and book down, spread open on the page of her puzzle.
“Do you drink tea or coffee? I can make you one” she asked.
“Coffee” you nodded.
“Milk? Sugar?” She shouted as you called back how you took your coffee.
She came back to bed after a few minutes with coffee, finding you trying to work out the sudoku that she’d been working on all morning. She left the mug on your bedside table before slotting in beside you. You tucked into her, still holding the book as you both worked the sudoku out together.
“Not to make this weird” Leah began. “But this is like, my ideal morning”
“I mean, I would rather go out for some fresh air than sit in bed doing sudoku” you laughed.
“Y/n?” Amy shouted, slamming the front door and heading straight to your bedroom in the apartment, before either you or Leah had time to react. “Oh, hello” she smirked.
“Get out” you moaned.
“Did you get lost, Leah?” Amy teased.
“You weren’t meant to be home yet” you huffed.
“Well I’m home now, baby” she laughed. “I am going for brunch with Jason, the boy from last night, so I will leave you two lovers in peace” she headed back to her bedroom as you let out a sigh.
“Well, come on then” Leah said shuffling out from underneath you, as you looked at her confused. “Let’s go for a walk, and get you a proper coffee”
You got up and got ready, letting Amy know you wouldn’t be too long and to enjoy brunch. You always made it extremely clear she could not mention a word of this to Keira, under any circumstances.
You made a pit stop at Leah’s hotel so she could get changed into something that wasn’t last nights clothes.
You walked and talked for around 2 hours, totally losing track of time. You talked about everything you would with someone on a first date. Hobbies, dreams, passions, your careers. One thing that didn’t seem to come up though, was your sister, and that guilt you both felt last night. That was long forgotten. Leah’s fingertips had brushed off your hand too many times, and it was driving you demented.
“Just hold my hand” you said, grabbing her hand and slotting it in yours.
“I was trying to be subtle” she shrugged with a laugh.
It was another while before you felt your phone buzz to see Amy calling. That was when Leah checked her phone to, seeing missed calls from both Alex and Georgia.
“I better go” you both said at the same time, before laughing.
“Hey, y/n” Leah whispered, grabbing your wrist to stop you walking away, even though you were yet to move. “I don’t want this to be a one time thing” she shook her head.
“Me neither” you added.
“Could we talk maybe when we both get back to England? You’re living in London now, right?” She asked and you nodded. “I’ll take you out” she smiled.
“I look forward to it” you kissed her cheek before you both turned off in different directions, and returning the missed calls you both had.
True to her word, Leah took you out on a date when you both got back from Australia. Despite the heartbreak she felt about England losing the World Cup, she somehow managed to not forget what she’d promised you.
You didn’t know if she was actually going to take you out, so you decided maybe right before a World Cup final, or after, when they’d lost, wasn’t the best time to mention to Keira that you’d slept with her best friend.
You went out on several dates with Leah, and you’d both stayed in eachothers places a few nights now. You were both getting closer, and eventually she asked you out, officially.
After 8 months, you both still hadn’t gotten around to telling anyone. You were both happy and didn’t want anybody or anything to jeopardise the relationship so early on. Only two people knew, due to them having to bear witness to you both in Australia and that was Alex and Amy. Who have since both walked in on you several times in the last 8 months.
“Babe” Leah shouted as she came into your apartment, straight from training.
“In here” you called back from the living room. You had dinner waiting and the show you have been watching together paused.
You weren’t living together, as that would have required you both being open about being together. But you may as well have been. You can’t remember a night where she wasn’t in your apartment, or you weren’t in hers.
“You’re late” you huffed.
“Sorry, got held up with some stupid interview” she mumbled as you pulled her into a kiss, “But I’m tearing up my contract tomorrow” she smirked as her body pressed you further into the couch. Her lips were practically glued to your neck, the food and TV long forgotten now.
She’d just pulled her training top over her head, with a little help from you, when your phone buzzed.
Keira.
“Shit” Leah groaned when she saw the caller ID requesting to facetime.
“Put your fucking T-shirt on” you snapped as she leaned over to get it and you grabbed your phone, reminding her to stay quiet. “Hey Kei” you smiled as your sister appeared on the other side of the screen. You were just ignoring your sisters idiotic best friend battling with her training top, thankfully out of sight from your camera.
“Hey, I just wanted to see if you were still coming next week?” She smiled as you saw Leah starting to smirk.
“Yeah, yeah of course” you nodded. “Is that okay?” You asked.
“Yeah, more than okay” she chuckled. “Just, Laura is going to be here and then Leah is coming as well so you and her can rock, paper, scissors for the bed and couch” she laughed. Leah’s smug look on her face was only growing and growing as she started acting out a rock, paper, scissors.
“Yeah, we will figure it out” you nodded with a smile, waving your hand at the blonde and trying to pretend the topic of conversation was not stood right in front of you, with her T-shirt not even passing her shoulders. “Listen Kei, I was just about to eat dinner” you said, trying to rush her off the phone.
“Weird thing to call me, but okay” Leah mumbled as you leaned and kicked her into the thigh, all not seen or heard by your sister on the other line.
“No sweat, I’ll call you tomorrow. Night” she smiled as she hung up.
“Leah Catherine Williamson” you frowned as you placed your phone on the table, beside your now very cold dinner, sat untouched in the bowl.
“I couldn’t resist” she smirked, quickly kissing you and laying on the couch beside you. You both looked at the very unappealing freezing food laid out infront of you both. “I’ll order a pizza” she sighed, taking out her phone and you pressed play on the show. When she was finished ordering, she put her head on your lap and you roamed your fingers gently through her hair.
“Did you remember to” you began as she chuckled.
“Yeah” she nodded. “You don’t always need to remind me. I’m aware of you and your gluten free needs” she playfully rolled her eyes as you tugged her hair. Leah was protective of you in a sense that she’d never let anything happen to you on her watch. Which is why when the pizza came, she grilled the poor delivery driver for 5 minutes to make sure it was gluten free.
She got back to the couch, handing you your box, standing with her own and frowning at you until you opened it. You knew from the night in Sydney that she was protective by nature, but since you’d started dating properly, she was like your own personal bodyguard.
“Lee it’s okay” you smiled as she sat down beside you to look at your pizza.
“I like you and all, but I’m just not eating that for you” she laughed, ripping her own box open.
“I was thinking” you mumbled as you chewed on your slice of pizza.
“Oh, is your head sore?” She smirked, munching on her gluten filled pizza as you shot her a look. She loved joking and teasing you, but she knew that look, probably a little too well. “Oh, serious talk. Sorry, continue” she said as she threw her crust in the box.
“Would you maybe want to tell Kei? When we go to Barcelona?” You asked as her expression turned cold, trying to scan your face. When she got no signs that you were joking, her expression softened.
“Would you want to?” She replied, eyes now glued to the ground.
“Well, I’d love her to know how happy you make me. But, if you’re not ready it’s okay” you reassured her.
“No, I want to. I guess we kind of have to seeming as I eh, I kind of like you” she sighed, followed by a laugh.
“Maybe, if we tell her, when we get back, one of us could go for a never ending stay in the others apartment” you smirked.
“You mean like move in? You want to move in?” Leah shouted, a bit too enthusiastically, making you laugh.
“Would you want that?” You smiled as she nodded.
“More than I want to tell your sister” she laughed.
Due to her incapabilities sometimes to be an adult, you stayed in Leah’s the night before your flight, so you could get her packed.
It was all a coincidence, to Keira, that you had both ended up on the same plane and the seats next to each other. It was almost like you’d booked the flights together.
“Did you’s have enough time to argue over the bed and the couch on the flight?” Keira and Laura laughed from the front seats of Keira’s car.
“We said we’d wait til we got here to decide” Leah piped up quickly, before changing the topic entirely. The plan was to tell Keira over dinner and by the time you got back to the apartment, the topic of bed and couch would no longer need to be had.
You subtly slapped Leah’s hand away when she instinctively tried to grab your bag when you got out of the car.
“Here, I’ll take that” Laura smiled, grabbing your bag. “You’re alright there to carry your own, aren’t you superstar?” Laura teased as Leah laughed. You just thanked God that it was your sister’s girlfriend that grabbed your bag, otherwise Leah would have given them an earful.
“Bedroom is just in there if you both want to leave your stuff in there for the minute” Keira smiled at you both. “I booked dinner for 7pm, so I take it you’ll need the full three hours to get ready?” She smirked at you as you rolled your eyes at her playfully. “You want to go get coffee while she gets ready then?” Keira asked Leah. She looked at you briefly and knew by your face what she should answer.
“Yeah go on then, you coming too?” Leah asked Laura who nodded. “You want anything back?” Leah shouted at you, putting her shoes on.
“Yes please” you called, about to turn off into the room before Keira spoke again.
“Are you not going to ask her what she wants?” She laughed.
“Oh, eh” Leah stuttered. She of course knew what you wanted, and forgot you two were meant to be pretending you barely knew eachother right now.
“An iced vanilla latte” you smiled, heading off into the room. The three of them headed off, and you lay on the bed for a few minutes, scrolling on your phone, before getting up to shower and get ready.
You heard them coming through the door just as you’d just slipped into your clothes.
“Uh, are you decent?” Leah shouted from the door. You already know she had a stupid frown on her face from not being able to just walk straight in.
“Yeah, come in” you shouted back as she practically burst through the door and closed it just as quickly. She placed your coffee on the bedside table before looking over at you. “Fuck me, you look stunning” she mumbled, making her way over to you and kissing you gently.
“Thank you baby” you smiled. “You’re sure you’re still up for telling Kei?” You asked and she nodded.
“I’m sure” she replied. “Now piss off, I need to get ready” she chuckled, kissing you quickly and heading over to her suitcase. She stood frowning at the empty suitcase, as she rattled her brain back, trying to remember if she had definitely asked you to pack her case.
“I hung up your stuff already” you smiled, grabbing your coffee and saluting her playfully on the way out of the room.
“Could honestly marry you right now” she mumbled as you shut the door.
Laura and Keira were in Keira’s bedroom getting ready too, and Laura was the first to emerge. She knew you really didn’t like football that much, and she was good like that, to not make it the topic of conversation. She lived in Rome for most of the year for her job, so it was nice she had got time to come and see Keira.
Leah was next to come out, wearing a suit you knew she’d spent a good bit of money on.
“Oh, look at little Miss England” Laura teased.
“Do I look alright?” Leah asked, eyes stuck on you.
“Meh” you teased as you and Laura shared a laugh. But you noticed the frown on Leah’s face meant she wanted a serious answer. “I’m just joking, you look really nice Lee” you smiled, making her do the same. Laura looked between you both, and raised her eyebrows slightly at the look you two were giving each other. Keira was last out, immediately rushing everyone out of the apartment and downstairs to get in an Uber.
You scanned the menu of the fancy restaurant that Keira had booked. Your eyebrows were furrowed as you glanced through the three or four gluten free options the restaurant had. Leah noticed you looked a bit stressed and put her hand subtly on your thigh, immediately making you relax. The waiter came over and took everyone’s order, you weren’t too sure on the pronunciation of the dish you were ordering, so you just pointed at it on the menu as the waiter nodded. Laura ordered a bottle of wine for the table as the four of you laughed and chatted waiting for your food. You noticed Keira seemed really happy. She hadn’t been this happy in such a long time. You wanted her to know how happy you were too.
The waiter brought over the four dishes and Laura ordered another bottle for the table. He rushed off to get it as you all began tucking into your food. You knew the second you swallowed it that it was not in fact a gluten free dish, and either you read it wrong or this wasn’t what you ordered.
“Shit” you grumbled, standing up quickly.
“Baby? What’s wrong?” Leah said, so casually.
“Baby?” Keira asked with a frown, but neither of you heard her.
“I’m fine, just don’t follow me” you quickly rushed out as you sped off to the bathroom.
“Your wine” the waiter said, beginning to pour into Keira’s glass.
“Excuse me, my girlfriend ordered a gluten free dish, is this gluten free?” Leah snapped.
“Girlfri” was all Keira could manage before the waiter started to stutter.
“Is it gluten free?” Leah said again, a bit more aggressively and firmly.
“I’m not sure” he held his hands up. “One moment” he raced off to get someone and came back with a manager.
“Stupid fucking Spanish restaurant and stupid fucking gluten, I fucking hate gluten” Leah grumbled as Keira stared at her and Laura was gripping Keira’s hand so tightly to try and keep her calm.
“Was this what she ordered?” The manager asked Leah, pointing at a different dish on the menu as Leah shook her head and pointed at the correct one. “I’m very sorry, I will get this for her now” the manager apologised and ran off to the kitchen, as Leah sat back down. You’d also just returned from the bathroom now, looking a little flushed.
“You okay?” Leah asked, hand returning to your thigh.
“I’m okay” you smiled and nodded.
“Girlfriend” Keira shouted, so loudly, nearly everyone in the restaurant turned to look at your table. “What do you mean girlfriend?” She asked.
“Keira, calm down” Laura pleaded, but Keira brushed her off.
“How long have you two been together?” She snapped.
“Since Sydney” Leah mumbled.
“Sydney?” Keira shouted.
“Kei, can you keep it down?” You whispered.
“I want to go” Keira clicked her fingers at Laura who nodded and instantly stood up. Keira walked off towards the door before Laura, who was still stood at the table, fiddling with her wallet, had moved.
“I’ll sort it, just go” Leah huffed.
“She’ll come around. You two are good together” Laura smiled, before running off after Keira. The manager came back with your new dish, and was perplexed to see half your table was now missing, you were crying and Leah looked like she was going to punch something.
“Can I get you these to go?” She offered.
“And the bill” Leah nodded. She came back with boxes and the bill that Leah didn’t even hesitate to pay for. Leah had given you her jacket as she held onto a bag with everyone’s food and the bottle of wine in it, and had her phone in the other, ordering a taxi.
The drive to Keira’s apartment was dead silent, neither of you knew what to say to eachother, really. You felt Leah’s hand sneak over yours and that was the first time you’d looked at her since she asked if you were okay when you’d returned to the table.
“This doesn’t change anything for me” she whispered. You smiled at her weakly, because you felt the same. You were just so upset.
Laura eventually opened the door after persistent knocks from Leah. You went straight to the bedroom, like your sister had done, point blank refusing to come out, while Leah and Laura talked in the kitchen.
“She’s very upset” Laura mumbled as Leah nodded.
“Should we maybe go? I could take y/n to a hotel” Leah suggested.
“That’ll make it worse” Laura shook her head as it fell silent for a few seconds. “Are you two serious?” She asked.
“Look, it happened in Sydney, I don’t think either of us were looking for more than what happened. But, we got home and we were still talking and then we just started dating” Leah shrugged.
“So it’s not just a fling?” Laura added.
“We’re not just messing around, if that’s what you’re asking” Leah frowned. “She’s my girlfriend, I, I’m in love with her” Leah said.
“You’ve never said that before” you mumbled from the door of the bedroom. Your head was thumping and you needed a glass of water. You just weren’t expecting to walk into a confession.
“That I love you?” Leah asked and you nodded. “Well, I do. I love you” she smiled.
“I love you too” you kissed her briefly before instantly pulling apart and remembering quickly where you were.
“Wait there” Laura said, as she headed off into your sister’s bedroom. You could hear shouting, mostly coming from Keira from the room. How Laura ended up getting your sister out of the bedroom a few minutes later is still a mystery to you. “She’s not angry anymore” Laura chuckled.
“Yes I bloody am angry” Keira grunted.
“Kei, I’m so sorry” you pouted. “I’m not sorry about being with Leah, but I’m sorry we kept it from you”
“It’s not you I have the problem with” Keira frowned at Leah.
“It’s her fault” Leah protested playfully making Laura laugh.
“Leah, be serious” you moaned as she was the one to pout now.
“I’m sorry Kei, but I’m in love with her” Leah shrugged. “And I’m gonna keep being in love with her, even if you tell me not to”
“You’re actually being serious, aren’t you?” Keira asked, looking at the expression on Leah’s face as the blonde could only nod. “Jesus Christ, you fancy my sister? Are you stupid?” Keira laughed as every bit of anger left her body and Laura released a huge sigh of relief.
“Hey” you shouted defensively.
“Who else knows? Do mum and dad know?” Keira asked you.
“Only you two, Amy and Alex” Leah replied softly.
“God, my sister” Keira laughed at Leah who rolled her eyes at your sister. “Well, I’m sorry for ruining our first double date. We can try again at breakfast in the morning” Keira smiled.
“Come on then, let’s get you to bed” Laura hummed softly.
“At least we don’t have to fight over the couch and bed now” Leah smirked, pushing you towards the spare room.
“Don’t push it, Leah” Keira shouted.
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boyfhee · 1 day
Text
박성훈 、PRETTY FACE
all the trouble sunghoon gets himself in lands him in your arms.
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featuring ⋆ rich boy! sunghoon x fem reader
contents ⋆ kissing, mentions of cuts, injuries and blood, just a whole lot of fluff i miss writing cute stuff, insecurities perhaps ( 1370 )
notes ⋆ rich boy sunghoon....save me from him. also this was not meant to be above a thousand words and was supposed to be funny. and this one's for saint @hoonvrs hi bae
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one thing you’ve learnt while dating sunghoon, it’s always an adventure. so unforeseen, like when he showed up at your balcony, again, last night with a few bruises and cuts on his face. you had let him in and he avoids your attempt at cupping his face just as swiftly. and dating sunghoon is exhilarating, with the way you let him stay for the night, again, knowing your parents are home.
“good morning,” you smile and brush your thumb over the cut on the corner of his lips. it’s red, his lips are dry, and yet they’re soft when you lean down for a quick peck. 
“morning, sweetheart,” he says quietly. “how creepy of you to watch me sleep,”
“guess i’ll be a creep if it means i get to look at your handsome face,” you hum, fighting back a smile.
“is that a compliment i hear?” and he’s almost turning away to sleep, but your words catch him off, and he smirks drowsily with a soft and sleepy gaze adorning you. “what’s the occasion?”
“i’m serious, hoon. you’re handsome,” you insist with a frown, cupping his face again, thumb brushing over his cheeks as you lean in and whisper ever so tenderly. “so handsome, it’s crazy,”
“well, aren’t you sweet, my love,” and he can’t help but wrap his arms around you, pulling you on top of him. it’s quiet, you lay with your head on his chest. it’s barely six, you look out through the huge glass window panes installed in your room by your request to fit the aesthetic, but now it’s how sunghoon climbs up your room every other night. 
it’s not usual for him to get compliments. usually, you’re trying to play it cool, as if his words don’t affect you as much as he thinks they do. on other days, you’re busy rolling your eyes every time he flirts. you make him work for compliments, it’s funny, and he enjoys it. a little bit of challenge in his way too easy lifestyle keeps him going. but today— as you’re quietly listening to his heartbeat while he’s caressing your back— you want to stay like this. 
he brushes his fingers through your hair, planting soft kisses on your head every few seconds. it’s rare for you two to be this quiet. with sunghoon, every minute spent on bed leads to something else, most of the time. but this time it’s silent, it’s risky, he’s in your room and as much as he jokes about it, the idea of being caught by your parents isn’t something either of you fancy.
“i think i should get up and leave before your—” it lands upon you to worry about keeping everything a secret, today it’s his job to make sure the secret is safe.
“it stings, doesn’t it?” you cut him off immediately, pinning him down as he tries to get up. he can see the concern in your eyes, worries trickling through your finger tips and seeping through his skin when you lace your fingers over his scratches. 
“i told you, they’re not that bad,” he shrugs, too careless, carefree. he doesn’t know why you worry yourself over something so minor. “they don’t even hurt,” 
“it hurts me to see you like this,” and his thoughts are put to halt when the words leave your mouth. 
it was half past one when sunghoon knocked at the glass doors of your balcony. you were getting ready for bed after movies, and he was avoiding your gaze as you were running your eyes over his state— messy, hurt, and so were you.  
‘did you get into another fight with heeseung?’ you had asked and he avoided, again, dodging all your questions and attempts to check on him. you let him in, and he goes straight to your bathroom. his gaze doesn’t meet your eyes, he avoids all the eye contact and conversation. he turns away to take off his shirt covered in dirt. it’s worse this time. ‘come here,’ 
you grabbed his arm to pull him towards you, but he refused to face you. he’s ashamed, like every time he is when you see him like this. the pretty face you’ve always been so fond of no longer fits the definition. you tried to make him look at you, but he grabbed your hands, kissing your palms and pulled you to bed. 
“is that a new way of telling me to not get into fights?” he asks, feigning a yawn, a faint chuckle following by. you’re still on top of him, pinning him down, and if he didn’t know any better, you would’ve ended up under him already. 
“is it working?”
“a bit,” he mumbles quietly and pulls you closer by your waist, face nuzzling in the crook of your neck. he keeps planting tender kisses on your cheeks, and then down on your neck, as if telling you to let go of all the concerns that plague your mind. “you worry too much,”
“i know, i will continue to do that,” you pull back again, much to his disappointment. nothing could compare to the feeling of having you in his arms. “if not for your dad and for the sake of your reputation then at least for me, you need to stop,”
sunghoon knows.
if not for anything— it isn’t for anything else. not for his mother’s million dollars fashion brand, not for his sister’s business ventures, nor his father’s political career. it’s for you, every scratch, every nip and every cut, every drop of blood that had trickled down the corner of his lips when heeseung landed a punch on his face. how could he not? sunghoon can stand anything but people talking down on you as if they know you. it makes him fight for you and funnily enough, he’s happy to bleed to death for you.
“you always ruin the mood, bringing that old man up,” he’s deflecting— just as you had expected and you’re not backing down. one leg swinging to the other side, arms by his head. he’s down, caged, a position where he can’t avoid you. it’s about time you two had this conversation.
“i’m serious,” you’re trying your best to keep up the stern face, eyes locked into his. 
“i love it when you get all serious, angel,” he grins suggestively, arms around your waist again. he’s slipping them under your top, you slap it away and it only makes him laugh in amusement. “i suppose it is a bit too early for that,”
you don’t say anything, just looking at his pretty face. you stroke softly over the cut on his cheekbone and he flinches ever so slightly. it’s new, it stings, adorned by a bit of dried up blood just like the one on his lips. there’s one near his jaw from a while ago, it’s healing. each and every part an ugly reminder of how much trouble he gets in.
“you’re such a pretty face,” you whisper quietly and lean down to kiss him, trying to be so gentle to not hurt him even more. you take your sweet time, tracing your lips over those wounds, new or old, and then speaking with a voice impossibly loving. “even with these,”
“i love it when you call me that,” he takes your hand, kissing your palms. it’s not everyday that he’s spoiled like this.
and you pull your hand back, speaking with frown as if giving him a warning. “i won’t anymore if you get into another fight,”
“guess we’re making truce with heeseung,” he chuckles quietly, shaking his head, pretending to be annoyed. he finally pulls you down next to him and wraps his arms around you, kissing your forehead. “things i do for my girl,”
you let out a muffled laughter while your face is buried in his chest before looking up at him with love pouring out of your eyes. “for me?”
“for you,” you hand rests on his cheeks as he leans down for a kiss, and his hands wrap over them gently, holding them in place. when you kiss him so deeply yet delicately, like it’s a stellar reunion, he pulls away just for a brief second, whispering against your lips. “everything,”
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dreaming-medium · 2 days
Text
No Contact
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Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader
Word Count: 7.6k
Tags: ANGST with a happy ending, amnesia, memory loss, grief, pining, yearning, hurt/comfort
Summary: It was one of the worst car accidents the city has seen. You weren't supposed to be in that car, but you were. When you lose your memories from the incident, Chan is ordered to stay away for your recovery's sake; but it takes a larger toll on him than anyone could have imagined. Until one day, he just can't take it anymore.
A/N: inspired by this post. Angst ahoy <3 I had too much fun writing this. Maybe I like writing emotions. Enjoy <3
—————————————————————
No contact. That’s what Chan was told was best for you. That’s what was going to help your healing process. 
No contact whatsoever. No texts, no calls, no little surprise visits. No fucking contact. None. 
He was told it would just hurt you if he talked to you— that he would just make it worse. That you would only become more confused and upset. It would be absolutely detrimental for him to see you.
Hell, it might even make you worse. 
It’s killing Chan slowly. Every single day feels like torture for him. The days get exponentially worse. He feels like a hollow shell of his former self, like the wind goes through him when he steps foot outside. It feels like his shoulders are permanently sagged forward. 
But the worst part is that you don’t even know it. You don’t know how he’s collapsing inwards like a dying star. 
It was one of the worst car accidents the city has seen in years. A friend was driving you home that night; Chan had begged to be the one to pick you up, but no, you said it was fine, the friend was heading that way anyway. Why make the unnecessary trip?
You told him he needed sleep. Always putting his needs before your own. You always did. 
He should’ve put up more of a fuss. He should’ve put his foot down. He should’ve already been outside the house in his car with the passenger seat warmer on by the time you left that stupid party. 
He should’ve gotten out of the car and opened the door for you and had a cold bottle of water waiting in the cup holder. He should’ve kissed you on the cheek and asked you all about your time. He should have been there.
But he wasn’t. 
A drunk driver slammed into the passenger side of your friend’s car at a speed that you shouldn’t have even survived.
Miracles do happen, though. But what a price to pay for a miracle. 
For as long as he lives, Chan will never forget the sheer panic and terror he felt when the call came in from your mother. You were already at the hospital undergoing emergency surgery.
He was the last to know. 
After all, he wasn’t your emergency contact. He’s only your boyfriend.
Was. Was your boyfriend. Was? Is that the right word? He isn’t. But he is. There was no breakup. 
Is that what he’s going through right now? A breakup? 
You’re not on a break. But what is this? What is this loss? This severance is so horrible. 
It’s fucked up. It’s a fucked up, amnesia induced breakup. 
Memory loss is a funny thing. Doctors scratch their heads and shrug their shoulders without any answers. The brain is a tricky thing. 
Chan did what he was allowed to in that hospital. He sat in that stark white room under those harsh LED lights and he waited until you were awake. He even waited much longer after that because only two visitors were permitted inside your room at a time— and he wasn’t about to force his way in and kick one of your parents out. 
He let your sister go in first. He even let your cousin go in before him. But when it was finally his turn… 
He never got to see you. 
“The last five years?” Chan asked with a tight throat. Did he even have any more tears left to cry? How is there any liquid left in his body?
“She says doesn’t remember anything, Chan.” Your mother’s voice was just as hollow as his. “She was asking about her freshman roommate.”
A doctor stood in between him and your mom. “It’s best if we don’t throw everything at her at once. Amnesia victims rarely never get their memories back, but we’ve found that it needs to happen organically. Seeing her will overwhelm her and that could stunt the healing process.”
Chan’s mouth opened and closed several times but no words came out at all. His heart may have stopped. 
Does that mean…?
No…
“He can’t see her at all?” Your mother asked quietly. “Not even to visit? He doesn’t have to mention he’s her boyfriend, he can just say that he’s a friend, or a coworker, or—“
The doctor cut her off. “No contact. Not until we’re a bit through recovery and she’s starting to get her memories back.”
Chan was suddenly in a chair. 
When did he sit down? The Doctor’s hands were on his shoulders and he was looking down at him with a sympathetic stare.  
“It’s not forever, son.”
Chan was only able to nod. His mouth was so dry, the back of his neck felt clammy. His head was spinning.
Books often speak of moments as ‘Earth-shattering’. Of moments so catastrophic that the planet stops spinning on its axis and time stands still.
He gets it now. 
The doctor spoke a few more words to your mother before walking away. She looked down at Chan sadly. 
Your mother sat on the chair next to him and wrapped him up in a hug. His world was falling apart around him. You were slipping through his fingers. He couldn’t even see you.
Hot tears poured down his face while he sat there with his head in his hands. Why does it feel like he’s losing you? Why is this the only way? Why are these the cards that are being dealt?
Why didn’t he pick you up from that fucking party?
“She loves you, Chan… she’ll come to her senses, I promise, I promise.”
It’s been two months, one week, two days and eight hours since he’s talked to you. That long since he’s known peace. Since he’s known any sort of comfort. 
You’re the last thing he thinks about before he closes his eyes at night and the first thing he thinks about in the morning. No matter how many times he wakes up and feels the cold bed next to him, it never dulls the ache in his chest.
It’s not a healthy mindset, he knows. And it’s not that you were codependent on one another, that’s not it at all. You were just… ripped away from him. 
Food has no taste. The sky isn’t as blue as it used to be. Clouds don’t make fun shapes like they did with you by his side. The stars are still in the sky, he thinks, he hasn’t had the guts to look at them. 
God, you love the stars so much. You always talked about how pretty they are— how absolutely breath-taking you think the universe is. Chan would simply listen, he would always listen. All he ever wanted to do was listen.
How is he supposed to look at anything the same way? How is any day supposed to be normal when half of his life is suddenly missing. What’s the point of making music if you’re not there to listen to it?
5:00 PM is the hardest hour to get through. You don’t open the door to his apartment when you get off work. You don’t tell him about the things that happened during your shift. 
He can’t leave little snacks out on the counter for you to eat when you get home like he used to. 
Mice would get to it before you did. 
His lonely apartment is slowly losing your smell. He could spray your perfume, sure, you keep a bottle at his place, but it’s not the same. You somehow made the scent sweeter by letting it linger on your skin. 
All of your old toiletries are still there where you left them. Your spare toothbrush has been bone dry and untouched since 9:28 AM that morning. Your shampoo bottles are still half full and waiting for you on your shower shelf.
It had rained a few days before your accident. You had started a puzzle on his dining room table that day– you told him it was the perfect rainy day activity. It was a picture of different comic book covers. It’s now collecting dust. Unmoved and unsolved. 
Just like him.
It was a battle and a half to throw away your leftovers from two nights before your car accident. He felt like he was throwing away your normal life, your tiny domestic traces. 
He didn’t want to cleanse you from his life, but you were washing away. Your ghost was eroding with time. 
Your spare car keys are still hanging on the key ring. Your rain coat is on the third hook draped right over your work bag. Even your phone charger is still plugged into the wall on your side of the bed.
Did you know you forgot to put your favorite gold earrings on that night? You left them on the nightstand. They’re still there, don’t worry. Right next to the glass of water you drank half of. 
Do you even remember them…? He got them for you for your first Christmas together. 
There are so many signs of a life interrupted integrated so deeply into his. 
You’re a clock whose hands stopped suddenly at 1:24 AM. 
This sort of haunting is unbearable. You’re not a phantom in his life, though. You’re something so unattainable that he had once but it was taken away with empty promises of return. 
It’s like you’re a shiny diamond hidden away beneath lasers and traps like in those stupid, cheesy spy movies you love so much. 
Do you know what he would give to watch one of those with you in his arms right now? 
Chan feels like he’s banging on the glass of a one sided window, screaming for you to remember him. Meanwhile you’re on the other side only staring into a mirror, trying to pick up the pieces from before. 
Your mom sends him updates on your condition all the time. He knows that you started working at the local library about three weeks ago. 
You had worked there in college before graduating and getting your last job. It was one of your favorite jobs you ever had. That library was so special to you. 
To him too. 
It’s the library where he first met you. 
The same library Chan finds himself in front of now. 
He shouldn’t go in. He can’t go in. He absolutely should not go inside. 
Bang Chan you should not and cannot go inside this library. Under no circumstances should you step foot inside this building where your other half is working. 
Absolutely not. 
The door emits a soft ding when he opens it. Electronic. Quiet. Peaceful. 
There’s a certain type of silence that sits in a library. It’s closer, thicker— warmer. It’s an expected silence. They’re supposed to be quiet. 
Chan can hear his sneakers take every step on the carpeted floor. There’s no one sitting behind the front desk; that’s where you usually were. 
His eyes look all around, but there’s no sign of you anywhere. A few people toddle around the shelves. 
There’s more soft beeping coming from the self checkout. That’s new. They didn’t have that when you worked here years ago. You probably hate it. 
On the day he met you, you were wearing a pair of dark green pants and a black long sleeve shirt. Your hair was clipped behind your head and pieces were falling over your face. 
Chan was only in the library to look for the bathroom. He was on his way to lunch with a friend, but he just had to stop somewhere. The library was the closest option. 
When he had heard the sound of books falling, he investigated and found you in the center of the carnage, the glasses on your nose sat crookedly and you rubbed your head. 
Your eyes met. He was a goner. 
How disgustingly poetic that he finds himself here now. Where he really shouldn’t be. He was quite literally prescribed a restraining order against you. 
Chan meanders around with his hands in his pockets, the silence getting louder and louder the further he gets inside.
Maybe you’re not working today? 
No one is anywhere to be seen. He’s checking down all the aisles but he doesn’t see you anywhere. 
Maybe it’s for the best that you’re not here. He’s not supposed to see you anyway. He’s breaking the doctor’s rules by doing this anyway. 
He needs to leave. He needs to get out of here. 
His feet stop in front of the very aisle where he saw you for the first time. 
Empty. 
You-less. 
If he thinks hard enough, Chan can picture you in front of him, laughing quietly with the most adorable, embarrassed blush on your cheeks. 
What a moment. 
Is it possible to spend eternity in that moment? Obviously internal clocks can be rewound, paused, flipped every which way; can he go back to that day? Can he go back to the day where every single poem suddenly made sense?
He would take any day, really, any day that had you in it. Birthdays, holidays, late night dates, Hell, he’d even take a day where he only saw you when you dropped off a drink for him in his studio. 
Anything, he would take anything just to see your smile bloom on your face while he watches.
“Can I help you find something?”
His breath catches in his throat, it feels like he’s physically punched in the chest. That voice. That beautiful, melodic voice. He hasn’t heard it in person in months, only in videos he had on his phone. 
Slowly, Chan turns to face the source of his favorite pitch. 
His throat immediately tightens. 
There you are. You. Beautiful you. 
Standing right there. Looking at him like a complete fucking stranger. 
“I…” his voice is hoarse. Chan can feel the tears in his eyes begin to form. He didn’t think this through, did he?
You’re staring at him expectantly, waiting for him to say anything. You’re waiting, come on, Chan. Speak up. Say something. 
Looking up at the shelf, you look back down at him with a smile. “A history guy, hm?”
No.
“Yeah.”
You giggle. “I always had a thing for History.”
He knows. 
“Really?”
“Mhmm.” You respond with a grin. 
Specifically Ancient Rome. He knows. 
You continue. “Specifically Ancient Rome.”
Chan nods and clears his throat. His palms feel so sweaty. His chest is almost panting. Every single cell in his body just wants to lunge forward and wrap you in a hug. 
He wants to bury his face in your neck and sob while you hold him. He wants to tell you that he missed you so much. He wants to tell you how your pillow is losing the scent of your shampoo. He wants to tell you that he’s been DVR-ing your favorite show so that you can watch it later. He wants to tell you about his day. He wants to kiss you until you’re breathless. He wants you to hear the new song he’s been working on.
But—
“If you need anything, let me know.”
You start to walk away.
Chan feels his heart physically break. It’s happening again. He’s on the other side of that one way mirror. It’s happening again! No, no please. 
His eyes widen, the words get caught in his throat. Fuck, Y/N, please!
“W-Wait!” he says quickly. 
You turn around with a curious look. 
“The Odyssey,” he blurts. “Where uh… where can I find it?”
Your eyes light up. “Oh, I love The Odyssey.”
He knows. You collect different translations of it. 
“I collect different translations of that book, here I’ll show you where it is.”
With a little hop in your step you lead him towards all the classics. 
He watches you like you’re an oasis in the desert— maybe it’s because you are. You’re what he’s been crawling towards for two months. 
You lead him all the way to the shelf where the Odyssey lives. Your nimble fingers reach forward and grab one of the copies. 
Green nail polish. You still paint your nails green. You picked that habit up a year after he met you. 
The memories have to be there, Y/N, they have to be. Chan bought you that first bottle of green nail polish as a joke on Saint Patrick’s Day. 
Y/N, please. 
“This translation is my favorite,” you whisper and hand him the book. 
Chan smiles sadly and takes the book from you, unable to meet your eyes. He knows if he gazes into those gorgeous eyes that he’ll lose it. He’ll fall to his knees and cry. 
“Thank you,” he whispers back. 
You stand there for a moment, he can feel your eyes on his face. He always has been able to tell when you were looking at him, it’s a little, secret superpower. 
From foot to foot, your weight shifts. 
You only do that when you’re confused. Why are you confused? Y/N, are you confused?
“I’m sorry…” you start, sounding so unsure. “You remind me of someone…”
It feels like a defibrillator was hooked up to his chest. Chan’s eyes widen and he finally looks up at you. 
You’re looking at him so carefully. He can see the gears turning in your head. Your tongue pokes out of your lips and wets them. 
Y/N, please. 
“I just… I can’t figure out who. Do I… do I know you? I was—” You stop yourself. 
Fuck. Fuck! What was he supposed to say? Fuck! 
Chan wants to scream. He wants to grab you by the shoulders and cry that he’s your soulmate, that he’s the person that knows you better than anyone else in this world. 
Yes, you do, you do know him. And he knows you. He knows how you take your coffee, what movies make you cry, what color jell-o is your favorite. 
He knows that you never wear matching socks and you always lift your feet when driving over railroad tracks. 
He knows that when you were 6 you ran into the corner of a cabinet and that’s how you got that scar next to your eyebrow. 
Chan knows that your entire life you wanted to be an author but you’re so scared of failure that you decided not to chase after it. 
He knows everything. 
“I just have one of those faces, I guess.” It comes out of his mouth so strained. 
You stare back at him so carefully. Do you see right through him?
“Maybe,” you say slowly. You don’t believe him. He knows that tone. You absolutely do not believe a word he’s saying. “Are you sure?”
Chan swallows, he grips the book in his hand tighter. The lump in his throat almost doesn’t go down, more tears prick at his eyes. 
“I would never forget a face like yours,” he chokes out. 
Your eyes widen and you blush, looking to the side with a smile. You always were a sucker for cheesy compliments. 
After thinking for a second, you reach into your pocket and take out a little slip of paper. 
“Here,” you say after scribbling something down. Holding it out, Chan sees it’s your phone number. He has it memorized. “If you ever need more books to read… or find… call me.”
Chan takes the paper with a racing heart. He gives you a smile, his dimples showing. “I think I will,” he whispers to you. 
Another few moments pass of you just staring at him before you nod and giggle nervously. “Well, I gotta get back to work, so..”
Chan nods and moves to the side. You walk past him. 
Your perfume curls around him like a blanket and he craves that sweet serenity he finds when he holds you close and breathes you in. 
Three steps after you pass him, you turn around. “Oh, I didn’t catch your name.”.
“Chan,” he answers softly. 
“Chan,” you repeat. It goes right through him. 
Your voice. Your sweet, beautiful, melodic voice. Finally, he heard you say his name again.
“I’m Y/N,” you whisper to him with a friendly smile. 
“Nice to meet you, Y/N.” Chan has to physically force the word ‘meet’ out of his mouth. 
“You too, Chan.”
And with that, you were gone, retreating back into your fortress of papyrus. 
—————————————————————
A bad idea was going into the library that day. 
An even worse idea was texting you the day after to ask how your day is going. 
And then an absolutely fucking idiotic move was asking if you wanted to go to dinner with him. 
And the worst part? You said yes. 
So, now here Chan was, standing in front of the mirror in his bedroom getting ready for what you thought was a first date, but to him was just a dinner date. 
How is he supposed to do this? He’s not, that’s how. 
Chan fiddles with his bracelet right before his phone rings. 
His heart drops when he sees the caller ID, your mother. 
“Ah, fuck…” he whispers before grabbing his phone. Of course you were going to tell your mom, you tell your mom everything. 
“Hello?” he asks warily into the phone. 
“Hi, Chan,” she says slowly, she sounds nervous, why does she sound nervous. 
“How are you? Is everything okay?”
“It’s Y/N…” Her voice lowers. Chan’s heart drops. “Before you panic, she’s okay! It’s um.. she’s getting ready right now… for a date…”
Chan isn’t moving. Yes, he knows you are. He knows it. But words won’t form in his mouth. 
“Channie.. I’m starting to wonder if that doctor isn’t right.. I can’t stand the thought of her finding someone else when you’re waiting for her… I tried to talk her out of it but she just seems so floaty and happy. God, I feel sick to my stomach.”
His jaw clenches. Now or never. 
“It’s with me,” he blurts. 
Your mom goes silent. Then a huge sigh comes out of her mouth. 
“I wish I could say I’m angry,” a little laugh follows it. “I think I’m only angry that you didn’t say something.”
He tells her everything, down to the way he pretended not to know you. 
“Well, you’re going to have to tell her eventually.” Your mom sounds unsure, herself. 
“Or maybe she’ll remember me.”
“What if she doesn’t?”
Chan sits down on the edge of his bed. His eyes are staring at the wall, unfocused. 
She’s right. What if you don’t? 
“Then, I’ll just … do it all again.”
Silence greets him on the other side of the line. Another tiny laugh comes from your mom. “I always knew you two were perfect together. Just like two magnets, you always come towards one another.”
—————————————————————
“I’ve never eaten here before,” you say with a chipper smile on your face from across the table. 
Yes, you have. 
“Really?” Chan asks, taking a sip of his water. 
“I pass it all the time and always wondered how the food was.”
He looks back down at the old menu. 
This restaurant was more than special to him. It’s where he took you on your first date. It’s an old fashioned burger joint with the greasiest, most delicious French fries in town. 
The first time you guys came here, you talked and talked until the place closed. And even after that, you drove around and talked until it was late. 
“I’ve been here a few times, it’s really good. The milkshakes are some of the best I’ve ever had.” Chan’s sweaty hands fiddle with the menu. 
He’s more nervous now than on the first date. 
“What’s the best one?” you ask with a smile. 
A small laugh comes out of his nose. “The peanut butter one.”
It was your favorite. 
“Yeah but then you can’t have any,” you say so nonchalantly, looking down at the menu. 
His eyebrows knit together. “What?”
“‘Cause of your allergy.”
He stops. 
You stop. 
He has a peanut allergy. Chan has a peanut allergy. 
His lips purse like he’s going to say something but you beat him to the punch. 
“I’m sorry,” you blurt out. “I… I don’t know why I thought that.” Your hands grip the menu a little tighter. “Maybe I’m thinking of someone else?”
Chan shakes his head. “No, no, it’s okay. I… I do have a peanut allergy. Maybe I said something before?”
You stare at him for a long second before looking back down at the menu once more. “Yeah… um. Maybe.”
He definitely did not say something. 
Dinner continues on. Chan listens to you talk and pretends he’s never heard your stories before and he tells you ones he knows he’s said before. 
The entire time, you were beaming at him, just like you used to before the accident. Your face never loses its constant happy glow. He’s not sure that the muscles in your face know how to frown.  
You’re the last two people in the restaurant. The staff doesn’t seem to mind. Maybe they recognize you both. Maybe. 
A lull dips into your conversation. Both of you know you should leave. Neither wants to. Especially the broken man sitting across from you. 
Chan takes the last sip of his drink. The bill has been paid for about an hour at this point. You’re looking down at your lap with a pink flush on your cheeks. 
You bite your lip and look up at Chan carefully. 
“Are you… are you sure I don’t know you, Chan?”
He stares at you. Did you know that you always bite your lip like that when you’re confused? 
“I just… I really feel like I know you. There’s just…” you pause, trying to find your words. He knows you want to tell him about the accident. He knows you want to say it but you don’t want to weird him out. 
What the fuck is he supposed to do? What is he supposed to tell you? 
“Something happened to me a little while ago, my brain’s been… fuzzy since then,” you explain shyly. “I know you said you don’t know me but I just… I can’t help feel like that’s not true.”
Chan’s jaw clenches, his knee bounces anxiously underneath the table. His head turns to the side in his typical nervous tick. 
Your mother’s words echo in his mind, his tongue suddenly feels like it’s swelling to the size of his mouth— making him unable to speak. Should he tell you? Is it now or never?
“I don’t mean to make it weird, Chan.”
He licks his lips and opens his mouth. 
Your phone rings. 
A sigh of relief comes from deep within Chan’s chest. 
Reluctantly, you pick up the phone and hold it to your ear. “Hello? …. No, I didn’t know…. Yeah, of course…. Sure… Yeah, see you tomorrow.”
Just as quickly as you answered the phone, you hang up. 
“Sorry,” you mumble. “Someone called out of work for tomorrow, they need me to come in.”
“Do you need to get going?” Chan asks, looking down at the time. It’s well past 10 o’clock. 
A sad smile crosses your face. “I mean… probably.” The time on your watch flashes back at you. He can tell you don’t want to go home yet. 
“Come on, Y/N, I’ll walk you home.”
Chan’s already standing up from the table, picking his jacket up off the back of his chair. You watch his movements and slowly get up, your movements screaming reluctance. 
—————————————————————
It’s three dates later when the two of you are walking down the street towards your house. It’s only a few blocks from here, but you both decide to take a tiny detour through the local park. 
“I have to say I’m a little excited to meet your friends,” you giggle. “I hope that’s not weird.”
You already have. 
“It’s not weird at all. I’m sure they’d like you.” Chan nudges your arm with his elbow, his hands staying in his pocket. 
“Changbin sounds like a blast.”
He was your favorite before.
“The two of you…” Chan thinks over his words carefully. “The two of you would definitely cause some mischief.”
And you have. 
A tiny lull of comfortable silence falls over the conversation. 
Both of you meander towards the swings. A cold wind blows through the air but neither of you react to it. 
With a tiny giggle, you sit down on one of the swings and hold onto the chains on the side. 
You are just so… you. You’re just your authentic self. Amnesia or not, you haven’t changed a bit. It’s so charming.
“I can’t remember the last time I went on the swings.” You start to move your body back and forth, not too much but enough to get the tiny thrill the toy brings. 
Chan walks up and stands next to you, his hand coming out and grabbing at the chain of the swing next to yours. 
The brightest smile stretches over your face. 
God, it really doesn’t take a lot to make you smile, does it? He guesses that means it doesn’t take a lot for him either since he smiles when you do.
He can’t help it.
He watches you move back and forth, the cold breeze kicking up a bit more and blowing dead leaves across the sidewalk. 
“What’s wrong, Chan? Allergic to swings?” you tease. 
He rolls his eyes with a smirk. “No, I just far more enjoy watching you have fun.”
Your cheeks flush. If he didn’t know you, maybe he would’ve chocked it up to the cold. But he knows the difference between your blush and the elements now. 
“You’re a smooth talker, Bang Chan.”
“It comes easy with you, Y/N L/N.”
Another laugh from you. 
“Shameless flirt.”
He puts his hand on his chest in mock hurt. “Ouch! I just speak the truth, that’s all. Not my fault I like seeing you blush.”
Every word that comes out of his mouth feels so natural. If he really thinks about it, he’s in a weirdly unique situation. Not many couples get to start over, to feel those butterflies again. But here he is, his palms starting to get sweaty as he imagines kissing you. 
Would you call it a first kiss? Maybe. 
It has been four dates. It wouldn’t be.. inappropriate to kiss you, would it? The two of you kissed on your third date a few years ago. 
He wants to kiss you so bad. 
Should he? Shouldn’t he? God, why is this so hard?
Chan reaches out and grabs the chain of your swing, pulling it to a very gentle stop. 
“Uh oh, fun police,” you tease and look up at him with a grin. 
Looking down at you, Chan allows his eyes to look over every detail of your face that he already had memorized. You haven’t changed at all except the new scar on the side of your forehead from the accident. 
It’s the same eyes, same nose, same chin that he fell in love with so long ago. 
The same asymmetrical eyes that you’re so self conscious of but he loves. Your hair is wind blown and splayed every which way. It adds a childish charm to your features. 
Very carefully, Chan moves his free hand down to cup your cheek. His warm palm soothes your ice cold face. He hears your breath catch in your throat at his touch. 
His thumb swipes over your cheek, fingertips run down the soft lines of your jawline. Eventually his thumb ends up under your chin which he tilts up. 
Your eyes sparkle. They somehow capture the light of the lamps around the playground. But they’ve always done that. 
You’re always so enchanting.
Is this a good idea? 
Is kissing you the best option? 
But does he even have the strength to stop himself now?
Almost three months without feeling your lips on his has been torture, and here he is, with you in his hands and there’s still this nagging feeling that he should stop. 
One look into your eyes quells that anxiety. 
Your eyes keep flickering down to his own lips, the shaky breath you let out is hot against his fingers. Everything feels warmer compared to the air outside. 
He can’t take it anymore. 
Chan leans down and presses his lips to yours. They’re warm and slightly chapped.
But, my god, he’s never felt anything this heavenly before. It’s like his entire body unwinds. Like a fire was lit inside his stomach. 
He moves his hand to the back of your head and keeps your lips pressed against his. Your head tilts to the side slightly. It’s just like he remembers. 
It’s just the first kiss, he can’t let himself get carried away. He can’t. 
He can’t let his fingers wind through your hair. He can’t melt into your touch on his cheek. He can’t let himself drown in your lips. 
But he is. 
He’s letting you consume his very soul in one kiss. 
How can something feel so healing yet hurt so badly at the same time? It’s like you’re ripping open a wound and bandaging it at the same time. 
No matter how hard he tries, he can’t bring his lips away from yours. Your hand slides down to caress his jawline with those soft, manicured fingers. 
Your lips open and close over his like mirror images. The feeling shoots straight down into Chan’s gut. It’s like the first time for him all over again. 
Those butterflies are going insane in his stomach. Your scent kicks up in the wind and he can’t help but take a large breath through his nose. 
God, he can’t stop himself. It feels too good. 
His hand moves from the back of your hair to cup your cheek and bring you closer. 
He immediately stops. 
Why is your face wet?
Chan pulls away from the kiss and looks down at you with concern written all over his expression. 
You’re crying. Why … why are you crying?
Your eyes open and you look at him confused. 
“Chan?” you whisper. You’re confused too. What?
“Why are you crying, Y/N?” he asks with a thick voice.
Your eyes widen and your own hand comes up to swipe at your cheeks. Sure enough, you’re met with tears. 
“I… I don’t know,” you say so quietly. “I-I’m not sure.”
Chan starts backing away, your eyes snap to focus on his. Your hand shoots up to grab at his to keep him there. You’re still so confused. 
Emotions are flying through your eyes. It almost looks like someone is clicking a light switch on and off in the back of your mind. A lightbulb is flickering in your soul like a dying neon sign in an old shop window. 
Every muscle in your face is twitching.
What’s happening?
“Channie—“ your own voice cuts off by a sob. 
Chan’s heart jumpstarts. You haven’t called him that… not in two months… that’s what you and your mother called him before the accident. 
Are you…? Are you remembering? What’s happening?
Please. 
Slowly, your hand falls from his. 
Chan stays there, unmoving like a statue. What’s happening inside your mind right now? It looks like you’re reaching and reaching for something that you can’t quite put your finger on. 
He's watching you struggle. It’s like when you can’t remember a word. It’s right there. It’s on the tip of your tongue.
You gulp, your eyes leave his and you look down at your lap. The dirt crunches under your feet as you shuffle your shoes around.
Chan swipes his thumb over your cheek, brushing away the tears. He’s biting back his own. 
“It’s okay—“ “I’m sorry—“ are both said at the exact same time. 
He knew it was coming. He knows you. But you don’t know him. Not anymore. 
But you do.
“It wasn’t the kiss. I—“ 
“It’s okay, Y/N.”
You know him. 
“Chan, I really loved the kiss.”
Chan. Not Channie. 
He brushes his thumb over your lips. “It’s okay,” he repeats gently. “You don’t have to explain.”
His other hand comes up and tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. Your eyes slide shut at the sensation. 
Your bottom lip quivers and you pull it into your mouth and bite it. With a tight swallow, your throat bobs. 
“It happens sometimes,” you whisper. “It’s from the accident I had.”
Chan continues to soothingly rub your skin with his thumb. Slowly, he kneels down to be in front of you rather than leaning over. 
The dirt is cold on his knee. It seeps through the fabric of his pants. He couldn’t care less. 
“You don’t have to talk about it,” he whispers back to you. 
You shake your head gently, your hands folding in your lap. “No, no. I… I want to tell you. I need to tell you. It’s been happening more and more whenever I’m around you. It’s like every touch, every word you say bounces around my brain and makes me feel the worst case of deja vu.
“Every time I’m with you I feel like I’m trying to recall a dream I had last night but I just can’t remember what it was.”
You’re rambling. You only ramble when you’re overwhelmed and scared. 
“Chan, every time I’m with you it feels like some part of me is screaming to be let out.”
Your eyes open and you stare right through him. Chan feels his heart squeeze and almost stop completely. Despite your best efforts, the tears keep coming. 
“I was in a car accident a few months ago. I had such a severe concussion that I lost the last five years of my memory.” 
How is your voice so even?
Chan’s jaw clenches. Fuck fuck fuck. 
He knows. Yes, Y/N. He knows. Fuck, does he know! If anyone fucking knows, it’s him. 
“I—“ he starts but you cut him off. 
“Please,” you choke out and take a deep breath. “And since then I’ve been getting bits and pieces of my memory back. Sometimes they’re in large chunks, other times they just … come back.
“When I try to think about my life before the accident. There’s this… person there. Someone important. Someone so, so important that it physically hurts me to think about how I don’t know who it is. They’re a constant. And I love that they’re a constant.”
Your hand comes up to clutch at your jacket right over your chest. 
More tears come out of your eyes. The whites get more pink the more they flow. 
“But I know them. I do! I know them like I know the back of my hand. I-I know they love music. I know they take milk and sugar in their morning coffee. I know they don’t get enough sleep at night.”
Louder and louder your voice gets as you grow sadder and sadder. The sobs between thoughts wrack your chest. 
Him. You’re talking about him. 
Chan’s hands hold your face gently. His thumbs can’t keep up with how much you’re crying. 
Nothing has ever hurt this bad. 
You know him. You just don’t know it’s him. 
Nevertheless, you continue. “I remember that they have the most obnoxious phone alarm in the morning. I remember the passcode to their phone is 032518. I know that they have this one black sweatshirt that I love to steal even though it’s their favorite.”
Chan’s own eyes begin watering, he can’t stop it. You know him. You know him. You’ve remembered him this whole time and you didn’t even know it. 
You reach up and grab one of his hands and place it on your heart. Underneath your jacket, he can feel your heartbeat thudding violently against your chest. 
That same heartbeat he’s been dying to listen to while you play with his hair and tell him about your day. The heartbeat he would give anything to hear as he falls asleep. His throat gets tighter and tighter. 
“I’ve been surrounded by bits and pieces of a ghost and no one wants to help me. No one will tell me anything, and I’m so confused, Chan. I can tell that there’s something that everyone is avoiding telling me.”
A gust of wind picks up through the playground. It nips at his cheeks. It’s now he realizes how many tears are falling. 
A sob tears from his throat. 
You grip his hand tighter. 
“Tell me It’s you, Chan.” You’re begging. You’re actually begging while keeping his hand pressed against your heartbeat. 
“Tell me that you’re the person that I see in my dreams. Tell me you’re the one that loves when I draw hearts on the bathroom mirror after I shower. Please tell me that you’re the one that loves the smell of lemon cookies but can’t stand the taste.”
Oh, god, Y/N.
“Tell me that you’re the one that wanted to pick me up from the party that night but I said no.”
He breaks. 
He breaks right down in front of you. Every single ounce of self control leaves his body and he grabs you out of the swing, yanking you towards his body and holding you against his chest.The emotions that were being kept at bay came out like a raging storm. 
He falls backwards into the dirt, you come crashing into him. Your arms wrap around him at the same time he wraps around you. 
Chan buries his face in your neck, one hand on the back of your head and the other firmly around your waist. 
Wails leave his mouth as he holds you to him. They’re deep and come from the very depths of his soul. The wound that’s been open for months is bleeding.  
Every lonely night. Every dinner where he cooked for two instead of one by accident. Every long day he came back to an empty apartment. It’s all coming out. 
You’re crying just as hard as he is, both of your hands gripping the back of his hoodie like a lifeline. 
Your body in his arms is like a piece of a puzzle. Like he’s the dusty one sitting on his dining room table and you finally came in and finished it. 
Weeks and weeks of grief come crashing down on him. He can’t lie anymore. Not to you. Never to you. 
“It is me,” he cries into your neck, his hand running over the back of your head, feeling your hair slip through his fingers. It’s just like he remembers. “It’s all me, Y/N, It’s me.”
Your cries get louder, your body starts shaking in his arms. 
“I’ve missed you, Y/N,” he cries harder. “Fuck, I’ve missed you so much. I missed my girl. Oh my god, I’ve missed you.”
Chan can’t pull you close enough, he can’t get you close enough to his body. You shift around and press yourself into him. 
“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry I didn’t pick you up that night. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. I’m so sorry you got hurt.” 
Every ounce of grief is surfacing and clawing its way out of his throat. 
“I’m sorry I had to lie to you these last two weeks. I’m so sorry, Y/N. I was so broken without you. I broke the doctor’s orders. I needed to see you, Y/N.”
Despite how hard he has you gripped against him, you manage to pull away slightly. You sit up in his lap and look down at his red, tear soaked face. His eyes are puffy and his chest is sputtering with sobs. 
Both of your hands cup his cheeks and swipe away the tears the same way he did for you only a small bit ago. There’s a sad smile on your face. 
“Please don’t apologize, Channie, it’s okay. I forgive you.”
Channie. You called him Channie.
He cries harder and buries his face into your chest. Your arms immediately come around him and keep him there, fingers threading into his hair. 
You’re still crying. Both of you are. 
“I know you were just doing what you were told to,” you whisper into his hair. He can hear your voice reverberate in your chest. 
All he can do is cry. 
Months of build up led to this moment. Endless days of going through the motions just for the next to be as dull and tedious led to him falling into you in the middle of a playground at night. 
The only thing you do after that is hold him. You press kisses to the top of his head and whisper that you forgive him over and over. 
Each one adds a stitch to the wound, shutting it.
You’re finally in his arms. You’re finally back where you belong. 
“I missed you,” he says again, his cries dying down. He doesn't know what else to say. There's so much he wants to tell you, but everything dies on the tip of his tongue.
“I missed you too, Channie. My heart missed you so much.”
He sniffles and looks up at you. You pull your sweatshirt sleeve up and wipe away his stray tears gently. 
“Every day it just felt like something was missing. It was you. You were missing.”
Chan can’t find any words to say. He just stares at you. 
"I don't care how long it takes to remember, or even if I never do. I need you by my side for it, Chan."
His eyes sparkle at you for a moment but he leans up and captures your lips with his once more. It feels even better than the previous one.
The two of you relish in the contact, holding each other close and clinging to the closeness of it all.
It's taking everything within Chan not to start crying again. He's worried than any moment now, he'll wake up and this will all be some cruel dream.
But when you pull away from his lips, and he opens his eyes-- you're still there. You're still in his arms and smiling at him like you always did.
The burn is soothed.
“If you think about it,” you start with a tiny smile. “We’re lucky— in a way.”
His entire face screws up, even more confused. “Lucky?”
“How many people get to say they fell in love with the same person twice?”
Chan blinks twice before it feels like his entire body thaws. 
You and your glass half full attitude. He’ll never fucking get enough of it. 
His arms wrap around you again, bringing you down into his chest. You let out a breathy giggle 
“You’re never leaving my sight,” he breathes out. “Never again, baby, never.”
“I don’t ever want to, Channie. I never will.”
828 notes · View notes
rafeandonlyrafe · 1 day
Text
angel of a daughter
Tumblr media
words: 2.2k
warnings: 18+ only!, smut, stepcest, stepdad!rafe, p in v sex, unprotected sex, virgin!reader, female receiving oral, fingering, breeding, fertility issues (from mother), reader is described as having big boobs, kinda pregnancy kink from rafe but more talk of sex while pregnant, cheating (no daddy kink)
“i got the results back.” your mom says, her voice low and sad, revealing her results with her tone alone. “the doctor says theres no way.” “i’m sorry, mama.” you pout, wrapping your arms around her shoulders. you hate that you feel a bit of relief. your mom had you young, a teenager knocked up by another teenager who ran off the second he heard his girlfriend got pregnant.
your mom raised you until you were a teenager yourself, doing everything by herself until your stepdad came into the picture. he inserted himself perfectly into your life, but expected to have kids of his own.
“whats the plan then?” you question as your stepdad comes into the living room, setting a glass of water down in front of your mom. you sit on either side of her, showing your support. “adoption? surrogate?” 
you like being an only child. you like it just being you, mom, and rafe, but at the same time, you want your mom to be happy, and if a baby gives her that, you'll adjust for her.
“actually…” rafe clears his throat. “we were hoping you’d be willing to help out.”
“yeah, of course.” you nod. “anyway i can.” 
you don’t realize what rafe means until later. you assumed it was just help researching adoption agencies, or finding a surrogate, but as rafe hovers over you, you realize he means to breed you.
“m-my mom can’t be okay with this.” you stutter out, body stiff against the bed, trapped as you blink up at rafe, body caging you over the mattress.
“she thinks you’re going to get inseminated.” he huffs out, breath warm against your face. “and in a way you are. a natural way.”
“i-i-” you stutter out. “i don't know about this.”
“come on, i see the way you look at me.” rafe shifts his weight to one hand, gliding down the other down your torso, squeezing your hip gently. “i know you want this.”
“you're married to my mom!” your eyes are wide, but a spark does ignite inside of you. “you're my stepdad!”
“and you’re going to be doing both of us such a big favor, pretty girl.” rafe coos, his fingers running along the material of your shorts, stroking closer and closer to your center every time.
“i-i guess it would be easier than going to a doctor.” you’re sure it involves waivers and legal shit that your mind just can’t even wrap around.
“exactly!” rafe smiles down at you, glad for your naivety. “besides, im making you feel good... you’ll get pregnant, and both of us will feel real good.”
“how many times will we get to do it?” you whisper, hands reaching up to touch rafes cheeks, running your finger down the smooth planes. “like, it probably won’t take the first time.”
“as many times as we have to babygirl. and i’ll take real good care of you during your pregnancy. rub your feet, buy whatever you are craving, eat you out.” rafe loves the way your eyes blow wide.
“thats not appropriate!” your mom has lectured you long and hard about sexual experiences and above all how important it is to wait so you don’t become pregnant young like she did. and now she is asking you to allow your stepdad to breed you when you’re freshly out of your teen years.
“its okay, its just you helping us out so im helping you back out in return.” rafe moves his hand up to cup your cheek. “let me show you.”
he leans down to press your lips together in a kiss. you lay frozen for a moment before beginning to move back, reciprocating the kiss as your hands fist into his shirt, tugging him lower.
you let out a moan into his mouth and rafe has to pull away to chuckle. “see, i knew you wanted me babygirl.”
“yeah.” you nod. “okay, lets do this.” damn the consequences, you can think about them later.
“good.” he coos out, lips back against yours quickly as his hand gropes at your breast, rubbing them through your tanktop. you’ve always been insecure about the size of your chest, but as rafe lowers down to look at them, you think about them in a whole new light.
“these are gonna feed our baby so well.” he says, tugging at the hem of your shirt, lower and lower until it breeches the swell of your breasts and they pop out the top. you don’t ask who he means by ‘our’. you can indulge in the fantasy that it’s just you and rafe. that your mom is still in the picture, but only in the role as your mother, not the one of rafes baby. 
rafe wraps his lips around your nipple, sucking deeply into his mouth, so in contrast to what it must feel like to have an infant feeding.
“i-more.” you gasp out as rafes fingers play with your other nipple, rolling and pinching at it until they’re both stiff peaks.
“i can’t wait to fuck you baby.” rafe says, helping you sit up just slightly to pull your shirt off, the small pajama shorts the only barrier you have left on your body. rafe also tugs his shirt off. you’ve seen him shirtless before in the pool or on your boat, but its different in this low lighting, so intimate and close. 
“gonna eat your pretty pussy first though.” rafe tugs your shorts down, your thighs pressing together to allow you to keep that part of yourself hidden for a moment longer, before rafe is pushing at your legs and slotting himself onto the bed in between them.
“aww.” rafe smiles, looking much more like a boy your age with his grin rather than your stepfather. “i knew she’d be cute.” his hands stroke over your inner thighs. “have you ever had a guy eat your pussy before?”
“no.” you shake your head. “never done anything with a guy.” you’ve kissed past boyfriends, but it never went beyond that.
“im gonna be your first?” theres a spark in rafes eye when he realizes that you’re a virgin. that he’s going to deflower you, fill you up. 
“y-yeah.” you nod. 
rafe wants you to cum once with his mouth and fingers first to open you up and get you wetter before he fucks you, so he wastes no more time, pushing his face forward between your legs, tongue swiping over your folds as you scream out in pleasure. 
rafe is glad as your moans increase with every flick of his tongue and glide of his lips that he chose to sneak into your room in a time when your mom was gone, off to the spa with her girlfriends, no doubt sharing to them her recent doctors trip and how her angel of a daughter agreed to be a surrogate so her and rafe could have a baby of their own.
“you taste so good.” rafe says. he isn’t one to enjoy giving head often, but you really are the sweetest taste on his lips. he focuses in on your clit as your entire body stiffens before relaxing, sighing out as your head becomes fuzzier and fuzzier with every touch of rafes mouth.
“do you touch yourself here?” rafe asks, pressing kisses to your clit, making out with it just like he did you mouth.
“no.” you shake your head. you occasionally grinded yourself into a pillow stuffed between your legs to get off when you got too overwhelmed, but you never reached your hand in your pants to feel yourself.
“what about here?” rafe brings his hand to your cunt, finger circling around your entrance.
your eyes widen again, that gloriously innocent startled look that has rafe grinding into the bed to give his cock some sort of relief.
“never!” you shake your head.
rafe just smiles, going back to focusing on your clit as his finger pushes in. you’re so wet it’s not difficult at all, but he can feel the way you squeeze around his digit, getting used to the feeling of the intrusion.
“relax for me, princess.” rafe says, sucking at your clit as he begins to move his finger in and out until he’s able to easily pump, the delicious squelching of your wetness filling the room with his every movement.
“gonna add a second, okay?” rafe talks you through the process, not wanting to do something to scare you into changing your mind. “gotta open you up for my cock, baby.”
rafe pushes a second finger into your entrance, working you open until he feels your body stiffen, his concentration going to your clit as he works you through your orgasm, your high so suddenly breeching that your body locks up and you let out a scream.
“shh, i got you.” rafe kisses along your mound as you work through it, pussy clenching around his fingers as he scissors them, knowing he needs you looser to fit inside.
“that-” you gasp out, mouth suddenly feeling dry. “that was so good.” “yeah?” rafe smiles up at you. “i can keep helping you feel that way, baby.”
“mhm.” you nod, not sure how you’ll ever go without now that you’ve felt the high that rafe can get you.
“can i fuck you now?” he questions. as much as he’s ready to go right now, if he has to build you up to allow him inside bare, he would wait.
“yeah.” your voice is dripping with eagerness. “yeah, yes please. just need a drink of water first.”
you sit up slightly, going to reach for your water bottle on your bedside table, but rafe moves quicker, helping you bring the bottle to your lips and suck the water down, pulling away with a gasp as a drop of water glides down your chin, reaching your throat before rafes tongue is on your skin, tasting the sheen of sweat as he follows the wet trail up to your lips, kissing you to keep your mind occupied.
he works his pants and underwear off while you’re wrapped up in the kiss, your hands stroking through his hair, playing with the strands. 
rafe moves your legs to wrap around his hips as he holds onto his cock, swiping it through your folds. he taps the head against your sensitive swollen clit, making you pull away with a gasp.
“stay nice and relaxed for me, baby.” rafe says, pressing kisses to your jaw as he lines up with your entrance. he pushes in slowly, your eyes clenching shut as your chest moves up and down with each breath, trying to keep your body relaxed like rafe said.
“there ya go.” rafe says, halfway inside your cunt. “good girl.”
he pushes as far in as your pussy allows, both of you sitting in that moment, relishing in the feeling of being joined together as you stretch to accommodate his large length, shifting your hips side to side and up and down to get used to the feeling.
“i gotta move, baby.” rafe says, his voice sounding strained.
“yeah, go ahead.” you nod. despite your affirmation, rafe continues to move slowly, his hips swinging back before pressing forward, carefully building up a rhythm.
“it feels really good.” you tell rafe, your cheeks flushed bright pink, hair fanned out on the pillow around you like a glowing halo.
“yeah, yeah.” rafe nods rapidly, his grip on control quickly loosening. “you feel so good too.”
rafe knows he should stop, but he loves the way your body reacts to his dirty words. “you’re so tight around me. i love this pussy. so much better than your mamas. gonna give me a baby, right?”
“i-yeah.” you nod. “fill me up.”
rafes loosening control shatters, his hips swinging forward fast, burying his cock inside of you as the pace instantly triples. you let out a squeal, the sheets gripped in your hands as he pounds into you.
“gonna fill up your pretty little cunnie, baby.” rafe grunts out, his own forehead sheening with sweat from his effort, his muscles straining as he pushes up then down, up then down.
“want it so bad.” you whine. 
“fuck.” rafe gasps out, mouth dropping open, his lips shiny from eating you out. “can’t last much longer. gonna cum.”
you experiment, clenching your pussy around his cock, and judging by rafes reaction of a loud moan and curse, you can tell he likes it. you continue, squeezing every time he pulls out, wanting to keep his cock wrapped in your warmth.
“i-im cumming.” rafe gasps out, his cock growing inside of you before your eyes widen, suddenly feeling warmth spreading as his cum fills you, his cock pressing in even harder, hoping it reaches your womb.
“god.” rafe groans, lowering his body on top of yours, but you don’t care about the weight as you smile.
“we’re gonna keep doing that?” you ask, running your hand down his back.
rafe looks up at you. “oh, of course baby. gonna keep fucking you while you’re pregnant too, maybe you’ll give us twins.”
you roll your eyes and giggle at rafe. “thats not how it works, silly!” “oh, what do you know?” rafe smirks at you. “you haven’t even had sex before!”
“well… i have now.” you mumble, shifting your hips from side to side, rafes cock still lodged deep inside of you.
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