❝ there’s no time for sentimentality. ❞ ⸻ @blighteds ( anabella ) .

and there is a softness in his heart that begs for forgiveness , begs to forgive , to forgive , forgive . he's unsure if he can , unsure if he will . he stands before her and the her presence is the same domineering shadow it always has been . it zaps the peace from his lifeforce and leaves him struggling to hold himself in the present , in reality . he feels shackled to his past for this moment , and he thinks of clive . ever - bound to what was , wishing to free himself into what will be . joshua oft exists in what is , whether what is may prove a ghost of his former self , or the haunt of his very existence , a blight on this land that he wishes to preserve . to heal .

his voice wavers , and he succumbs to quiet . silence sits with them like a third entity for some time . he shatters it , ❛ i only thought - ❜ she does not care for excuses , remember . ❛ you're right . apologies . ❜ his words are stiffer than usual . pointed , and uncomfortable . still , despite this meek appearance , he has grown so much , and seen so much of her folly . his disagreements and passion for a just cause overwhelm him and he speaks up with more confidence , determination holding together every syllable ,

❛ have you changed , mother ? or have you always been so cruel ? ❜

i know it's true , but please , tell me this isn't you .