#i struggled for way too long getting the fucking duration of TWO SINGLE FRAMES right. i hate animating what the fuck
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both of them are dead but one of them is a walking corpse and the other one has left his body (still bleeding out on the ground btw) and now things are weird
#sorry i just had this stupid scene in my mind and it went from being really heartbreaking to hilarious#like imagine they stand there and theyre all crying and bruno turns around to try and keep himself together#and he just locks eyes with abbacchio#who is also dead on the ground.#and abbacchio goes 'wait wait bruno what the fuck you can see me how the fuck can you see me youre alive'#and bruno is like 'uuuuuuuuhhhhhh yeah about that lol'#jojo's bizarre adventure#jjba#jjba spoilers#vento aureo#bruabba#leone abbacchio#bruno bucciarati#bruno buccellati#i struggled for way too long getting the fucking duration of TWO SINGLE FRAMES right. i hate animating what the fuck#how do you guys do that
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Battle Princess Madelyn is an enchanting Ghosts N Goblins tribute that's hard to recommend
by Amr (@siegarettes)
Battle Princess Madelyn
Developer:
Publisher:
PC, PS4, Switch
Born of a daughter’s request to have a version of Ghosts ‘N Goblins with a playable girl, Battle Princess Madelyn carries both the spirit of that childhood desire and the series it pays homage to. This results in a game that both challenged and charmed me, bringing spooky character designs with a sense of cuteness, alongside familiar chaotic action.
It leaves a good first impression. I was drawn into the world and simple joy of warding of the assault of the undead. Changing the damsel into a pup that needed to be avenged (and watches over you as a spirit) was a cute, if sad, touch. But as I went on it slowly dawned on me that it wasn’t the game I wanted. The levels were unfocused, too often full of sprawling areas that felt barren and tedious to navigate. Alternate paths and secret areas seemed promising but often led to...dead ends? Or side quests with no tangible reward.
I felt pretty down on it. Until I was met with the realization that Battle Princess Madelyn was actually two totally different games.
It’s true! Selecting Story Mode from the main menu gives you a sprawling quest, complete with dialogue, cutscenes, collectibles, side quests and a non-linear hub world that unlocks as you gain new abilities. Selecting Arcade Mode, however, leads you to a very different game based on the arcade Ghosts ‘N Goblins style! The stages here are remixed from the Story Mode into more compact stage designs with a straightforward action game approach.
I stuck with Story Mode for a few more bosses to get a better feel for it and see if it could impress me, but ultimately I didn’t enjoy it. Simply put, it’s not very good. Battle Princess Madelyn namedrops Wonder Boy 3 as its secondary inspiration, and while I can see its influence here it doesn’t take any of the elements that game successful. Wonderboy 3 uses its different abilities to recontextualize the world and force you to play differently upon revisiting other areas. Metroidvania style games has a different approach, gradually unlocking the world with each new ability.
In either case, it results in a world that gradually begins to feel bigger as you gain new abilities. Battle Princess Madelyn fails to resolve either of those approaches, instead feeling as if it was designed with a moveset in mind then had the character stripped of those moves to crush down the world. It doesn’t feel empowering, just restrictive.
By contrast Arcade Mode gets off to a much better start. You aren’t given a very extensive moveset, but having the double jump and chargeable ghost dog attack from the go allows for better navigation and stage design. Immediately I was leaping around, changing course mid-air and dashing through its spaces while tossing lances and ghost dogs around. It definitely captured that arcade sensibility, and the more compact level design kept it dense with action and demanded my attention at every second. I was having a grand time, but there was one problem: I couldn’t get past the first level.
I don’t mean that the first stage was too hard. It was difficult, but not unreasonably so. Instead I was stopped in the first stage after defeating the boss, with the victory screen just hanging there announcing how legendary my battle was but refusing to move on. This didn’t happen on every playthrough, but it did happen a few too many times and made me terribly anxious that the same thing would happen after each boss. Thankfully it didn’t, but another major obstacle stood in the way instead.
Stage 2, to put it mildly, is a massive, unfair difficulty spike that almost made me quit the game entirely. I eventually got through it after literal hours of practice, but it was a huge early roadblock that kept me from seeing most of the game. A combination of projectile enemies that never let up and a long precision platforming section repeatedly aggravated me until I could find a solution. The archers in the stage barely give you a gap to retaliate once they become active, and the platforming section involves climbing on precarious platforms with snakes around them who also spit venom as bats fly around you, with a single hit sending you falling for seconds to an instant death. This section tormented me with its cheap deaths, leaving me with barely any health to try to figure out the boss. And if I died? Back to the start of the level.
Worse, there was no coming back to this stage later after a break. Unlike Story Mode, if you quit in Arcade Mode you need to start the whole game over. So I decided fuck it, I’m going all in and completing as much as I can in one sitting.
While the game can apparently be completed in less than an hour if you know the stages, I didn’t and there wasn’t exactly a way to practice them. Instead I spent several hours grinding through the stages. Completing Stage 2 confirmed my suspicions that it was out of whack with the rest of the game, as most of the following stages were more reasonable in difficulty, and I even defeated a few bosses within a few or even the first try. Plenty of these stages are memorable in their own right as well, with stages set during storms as you cross on a rickety boat, or one set in a snowstorm, prompting Madelyn to change into a winter coat for its duration.
The bosses are enjoyable as well. It’s a familiar bestiary, with large wolves, crabs, possessed trees and the like, but they often have a fun gimmick for taking them down. For instance, you might have to drop a load of cannons onto the crab, or distract the wolf with a large chunk of meat. These gimmicks aren’t very involved, mostly requiring you to shoot something to open up a vulnerability, but they add variety and remind me of some of the cool boss fights in something like Dragon’s Crown.
Despite enjoying these later stages it became really hard to ignore Battle Princess Madelyn’s faults. There are many bugs that make it more difficult that it already is. Objects frequently get stuck in walls, at times I repeatedly became stuck in a ladder climbing animation or had the walking animation freeze to a single frame. Your ghost dog is also the only way to attack at oblique angles, but it frequently fails to detect enemies, wasting your charge and leaving you defenseless as enemies approach.
The camera is by far the worst offender, constantly obfuscating platforms from view despite having plenty of screen estate to work with. A certain area on the pirate ship area kept having the camera briefly flicker to a different view, and jumping on a ladder causes the camera to instantly snap to it in an unpleasant and distracting way. All these problems mean it frequently forces blind jumps, which become more of a problem as the stages progress. One later stage even has an area where a horizontal platform you need to jump on isn’t synced up with a vertical one, forcing you to go to an area above where the horizontal platform is totally out of view, forcing you to make a jump with nothing but a guess of where it is based on the timing of its movement. If you miss you of course die and start the section over.
Even the once charming art started to wear on me. The heavy use of glow effects to simulate lighting isn’t my bag, but I can take it or leave it. What looks worse are some of the background art, which don't’ seem like they were originally created as pixel art but are rather higher resolution art that’s been scaled down. This gives it a highly compressed look not unlike the use of pre-rendered backgrounds from the PSX or Saturn era. It’s just a blurry, hard to look at mess.
This is especially true for the title screen and opening cutscene, which were clearly lovingly hand animated. You can see the high resolution art of opening scene in the trailer, but in the game it’s inexplicably compressed as if run through a terrible ancient codec. My guess is that this was an attempt to make it feel more in line with the pixel art aesthetic but it doesn’t work and ruins perfectly good looking artwork.
I hate to admit it, but Battle Princess Madelyn is hard to recommend. The initial charm wears off quick in the frustration of trying to overcome both its daunting challenge and technical issues. You might argue that this brand of frustration is in line with its source material, but the best of the Ghosts ‘N Ghouls series, as well as spiritual successors like Prinny or Maldita Castilla bring a consistency that’s missing here.
Even as I began to enjoy Battle Princess Madelyn my run was eventually ended by sheer randomness. A random weapon drop gave me a leg up early in my run, then a subsequent drop cut my range short and made ever encounter more difficult. Unlike other games in the style drops are inconsistent and you retain weapons after death, so a bad pickup means you’re forced to play with a disadvantage for a while. After hours of struggle this finally killed my run.
I kept playing after, but the decision of choosing between the meandering stages of the story mode or the forced marathon of arcade, stopped my momentum. Between that, the bugs and the inconsistent general direction, Battle Princess Madelyn has too many caveats to recommend. Maybe you could argue its lack of saves in Arcade Mode and unrelenting difficulty are in line with the games it draws from, but it’s hard to stomach that excuse when it so many other problems plague it. There’s a core to the game that might be salvageable, but as it is Battle Princess Madelyn brings back the frustration of the arcade without its magic.
#battle princess madelyn#hound picked games#switch#nintendo switch#pc#ps4#ghosts and goblins#ghouls and ghosts#arcade games#review
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Chapter 7
Hours after we’d arrived at my house, Destani and I parted ways for a while to shower and get relaxed. Destani slipped off into the guest room where she kept a stash of clothes from the many nights she’d stayed over and I made my way to my own restroom for a quick shower. Eventually, we met up in the kitchen where we both rummaged for snacks to get us through our girl’s night in.
“I swear Auntie be getting all the good shit. It’s like she knows exactly what a bitch like to eat!” Destani shrieked, snatching a bag of kettle corn from the pantry.
I laughed as I tugged the fridge open and plucked two cans of orange soda for us “I’m sure she keeps you in mind every time she goes to the grocery store.”
She turned to face me with both of her arms stocked with snacks and I wondered if she would be able to make it up the stairs without falling flat on her face “She does girl, I know she does. Look at this shit!”
A short while later, we were situated comfortably in my room. I loaded up Netflix and we settled on Paranormal Activity as our movie of choice. Reaching into the bowl that Destani had poured the popcorn into, I happily tossed a handful in my mouth. Within seconds I could feel my taste buds heating up from some unknown spice and I frowned.
Swallowing the mulled kernels, I scooped up my drink from the nightstand and turned to Destani “Why is this popcorn so spicy?”
“What?” She flinched at a scary scene in the movie and tossed a pillow over her face.
Lifting my cell phone to switch on the flashlight app, I aimed it toward the bowl and stared in horror at the red splotches that covered the sweet and salty treat.
“Destani, what is that?” I asked with a deeper scowl. From her safe haven behind the pillow, she peered over into the bowl and scoffed.
“It’s hot sauce.” She answered, as if dowsing a bowl of sweet popcorn with a spicy sauce was a typical thing.
My face morphed into a deep grimace as I stared, stunned by her disclosure “Who puts hot sauce on popcorn?”
“I do girl, it’s good huh?” The pillow never left her face as she peered over the top of it to tune back in to the movie. Deciding that the spicy, sweet, and salty snack wasn’t nearly as good as she claimed, I selected another treat from my nightstand then turned my attention to the television. The movie became entirely too scary and soon, we both nearly jumped right off the bed at the discreet sound of tapping against my bedroom window.
“What the fuck is that?” Destani laid her body out halfway on the side of the bed and halfway on the floor as she stared horrifically at the window. With a hand pressed against my racing heart, it didn’t take long for me to piece together just who was creating the sound effects on the other side of the window. I quickly stood from the edge of the bed and moved toward the source of the noise.
Reaching for the string connected to the blinds, I made a move to jerk it downward only to have my arm snatched back suddenly by a petrified Destani “Sy’Diyah, what the hell are you doing? You don’t know what that could be… are you trying to get us murdered?”
I smirked at her dramatics and proceeded to tug at the string, quickly revealing Chris perched on his signature spot on the big tree. Glancing at Destani, I snickered at the sight of her mouth hanging wide open as she stared at him.
“You standin there like you trynna show me with that mouth do, girl. Better close them lips before I give you a reason to have ‘em open.” Chris chuckled once I slid the window open.
“Nigga, what the fuck are you doing? I almost pissed my pants watching this scary ass movie, and you come knocking on the damn window in the middle of the night. You have clearly lost your damn mind!” Destani fussed as she moved back to my bed and crossed her arms over her chest with a pout.
He laughed as he sprang into the window with ease then turned to close and secure it “That’s because you’re a pussy Dez. What are ya’ll watching?”
“Paranormal Activity.” I spoke for Destani and myself, as I knew she wasn’t done pouting and she wouldn’t open her mouth to speak until she was.
“This shit’s not even scary bro.” Chris exclaimed, rolling my computer chair from beneath the desk and turning it backwards to take a seat.
“Why are you here?” Destani griped, cutting her eyes at Chris.
His face held a relaxed expression of amusement as he gazed at her with his head tilted “I got bored when I got home. So I figured, what the hell… let me go see what my best friends are up to!”
With a strident roll of her eyes, she pushed her body back against the mound of pillows and zipped her lips for the duration of the movie. And for the next half an a half, we sat quietly watching the movie... with Destani of course tucked behind a pillow for most of it. Once the final credits rolled up the screen, and Destani pulled my comforter and pillow off her head, we agreed to get prepared for bed.
“Well I’m about to get some beauty rest with every single light in the guest room on.” She declared, stretching her arms high above her head with a yawn.
Standing a foot over her at his full height, Chris meshed a large hand into the wild mane of curls atop her head “Go ahead and get your hibernation Smokey, everybody knows you need to be alert while you workin to prevent those forest fires.”
Throwing a playful punch into his side, Destani scurried away from the weight of Chris’s hand.
“Fuck you!” She exclaimed, placing a hand on her head and yanking the ponytail holder from the messy bun of luscious raven coils.
She turned to face me as she swept her bountiful hair to one side “Goodnight Sy. Thanks for allowing me to scare myself shitless by watching that bullshit.”
Giggling with a shake of my head, I stood from my spot on the corner of the bed and pulled back the blanket “Anytime Dez.”
“And ya’ll keep it down in here. I’m not trynna hear headboard banging and all that nasty shit you be on Chris.” With a cunning smirk, she glanced from me to Chris.
My composure nearly crumbled as my eyes bulged at her brashness. With a smirk and quick wink in my direction, Chris sighed and scratched at the back of his neck “I can’t promise you that Dez. The moment Sy allows me to take that ass down… it’s gonna be epic. And trust me the neighbors will certainly know my name.”
Destani roared with laughter as she peered at my reddened face and slipped out of the room, shutting the door behind herself and barricading me inside with Chris.
--
Curling my toes into the plush rug beneath my feet, I stood stationed in the center of my bathroom as I coaxed myself to exit. I’d never struggled to sit content and unaccompanied in a room with Chris, but lately I’d begun to find it difficult to do such a simple task. I was noticing a change in him that I wasn’t sure if I was quite prepared for. On one hand, I was well aware of the feelings that I had for Chris and I felt them surge and grow stronger every single day. However, I also knew that I was completely content being his friend and tucking the feelings that I had for him away. I didn’t need him to ruin that by showing me that the feelings were indeed mutual.
Flinching at the sound of a light knock against the wooden barrier, I stared at the back of it as if it would suddenly fly open.
“Hope, are you okay? I was really hoping I wouldn’t have to go home to shower… can I come in?” Chris called from the other side of the door.
“Yeah… yeah. Just a minute Chris.” My gaze shifted desperately around the space in search of anything to make it seem like I’d spent the last few minutes doing something productive. Zoning in on the toilet, I bolted for the silver valve on the side of it and quickly pressed my fingers against it. I stared into the swirling blue water, allowing it to calm me before I turned to face the door. Slowly prying it open, I glanced up into Chris’s smirking face and recoiled under his gaze.
“You alright?” He asked, leaning lazily against the frame of the door.
Nodding forcefully as I slipped past him, I moved to my bed and plopped down then snatched up the remote. I could feel the burn of his gaze a few seconds longer and I released a withered breath once he turned to shut himself inside the bathroom.
Nearly fifteen minutes later, I found myself bored and surfing through the channels of the television. My ears perked at the sound of the bathroom door swiftly opening. With my sight glued to the illuminated screen, I glanced from the corner of my eye as Chris ventured to the dresser that supported the TV. Over the span of many years, several of his belongings had found a way into my room and he utilized the top dresser drawer to store it all.
It didn’t take long for me to reroute my gaze as he stood tall, blocking my view. Droplets of water cascaded down the glistening butterscotch skin of his back as it flexed with each movement of his arms. He seemed completely unbothered as he rummaged through the drawer dressed only in a white towel tied off at his hips. My eyes roved over each tattoo embellishing his arms and upper back and they seemed more prominent than ever from the layer of dampness covering them. Locating a white t-shirt, a pair of basketball shorts, and a fresh set of black ankle socks, he finally sauntered back over to the bathroom.
Emerging just a few minutes later, he clutched onto a bundle of clothes he’d previously worn and tossed them on the floor closest to his side of the bed.
“What’re you watchin?” He asked, finally plopping down on the bed.
“Nothing… you can find something to watch if you want.” I slid the remote across the bed to him.
“Oh nah, I was just asking…” His words were quickly cut short by the sound of his cell phone vibrating against the surface of my nightstand. Stretching his arm to retrieve it, he quickly tapped the green button on the face of the phone and raised it to his ear.
“Hello.” He greeted once he answered the call.
“Hey mama, I… yeah ma I know but… ma… MA… alright ma damn… my bad mama, I’m sorry… okay… alright… bye.” I couldn’t help but listen as the tone of his voice dropped just before he ended the call.
Just as quick as he’d made himself comfortable, he slid to the edge of the bed and stood tall beside it.
“I have to go Hope.” He stated with a defeated sigh.
“What happened?” I asked.
“Ms. Joyce is pissed because she hasn’t seen me at home all day and I didn’t call her after the game like she asked me to.” He muttered as he walked over to his Nike slides and slipped his feet inside.
With a deep set frown masking his beautiful features, he turned to face me “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”
With a single nod of my head, I peered on as he sauntered over to my window. He slid it open and began his journey through, climbing onto the same branch that always somehow sustained his weight. I teetered over to the window, watching as he successfully landed in his own bedroom. He smirked through the glass and tossed a hand up in my direction as I pushed the blinds down, blocking him completely from view.
--
My eyes formed into tiny slits as luminous rays of the sun poured into my room through the thick blinds. With an exaggerated yawn, I stretched my body against the lush pillows I’d nestled myself into. I debated whether I wanted to climb from the coziness of the bed, but my bladder didn't hesitate to make the decision for me and I quickly lifted myself onto unsteady feet. Crossing my room toward the restroom, I hurriedly relieved myself then moved on to the sink to wash my hands. I reached for my revitalizing facial wash and rubbed two pumps of the product into my pores then after drying my face, finished up by brushing my teeth.
Once I’d moved back into my room, I recoiled away from the door just as it flew open and revealed an overly exuberant Destani.
Batting her doughy jade eyes at me, she sauntered into my room and plopped herself comfortably on my bed. “Good Morning bff!”.
“Good Morning Dez.” I giggled.
“Auntie’s down there whipping up some breakfast and she told me to come up here and wake your lazy ass up.” She exclaimed, kicking her legs back and forth against the side of my bed like a defiant child.
“Oh alright. I’ll be down in a minute.”
“Mmhm,” She muttered, roving her eyes around my room, “What happened with you and Mr. Brown last night?”
“For your information, he left last night. His mom called and she seemed pretty upset with him.” I explained, placing my hands against my hips.
Staring at me with a blank expression, she blinked slowly then suddenly furrowed her brows “So… that means ya’ll ain’t do anything before he left?”
Rolling my eyes, I snatched up a pillow from my bed and smacked her in the head with it “Dez, you are so desperate aren’t you?”
“What you mean I’m desperate?” She laughed as she attempted to dodge the blow.
“You want something to happen between me and Chris so bad,” She stared at me with forged astonishment as I smirked, “Yes you do, don’t lie. I’m sorry to inform you, but nothing happened between us last night and as far as I’m concerned, nothing will ever happen.”
Leaving her with confusion plastered all over her face, I trudged out into the hall and allowed my nose to guide me down the stairs to the kitchen. I found my aunt hovering over the stove stirring a wooden spoon rigorously in a pot with one hand and her phone pressed against her cheek with the other.
“Morning Auntie.” I whispered as I slipped past her, slowing down to place a tender kiss against her vacant cheek.
“Hey baby,” She greeted, smiling in my direction, “Breakfast should be ready in a just a few minutes.”
I nodded as I reached into the fridge to grab the carton of orange juice. Pushing the door shut, I spun around only to be stopped right in my tracks by Destani.
“I can’t believe you just did that.” She muttered as she glared at me through squinted eyes.
“What?” I grinned.
Rolling her eyes, she pushed past me and moved on to the table, where she slouched deeply into her seat with her arms crossed over her chest. I smiled innocently at her antics and offered her a sip of my juice, gaining a scoff and a hearty roll of her eyes.
And somewhere toward the end of my aunt’s conversation, I chimed in just as she bid the person on the other end of the line adieu “Who was that?”
“Don’t worry Miss Nosy,” She laughed, “Breakfast is done now ladies!”
Taking turns filling our plates, we joined together at the table for prayer then began to dig in.
“What do you two have planned for today?” My aunt asked.
“We were going to this small gathering that one of Chris’s friends is having tonight.” Destani responded for the two of us.
“A small gathering, huh? I know ya’ll lil fast ass, hormone driven teenagers are going to a full blown party… ya’ll don’t have to lie.” She laughed, taking a bite out of her delightful cheesy eggs.
“For real Auntie, there won’t be that many people there… that’s what Chris said anyway.” Destani explain.
Jerking her head back in surprise, my aunt nearly spit out a mouthful of the orange juice she’d just sipped “That’s what Chris said? Lord, I hope ya’ll don’t end up calling me from the Richmond County Jail. Anything that boy got ya’ll going to is bound to be some trouble.” We laughed and continued to converse over the delicious and hearty breakfast. Rising from our seats once we were done, Destani and I worked together to clean the kitchen before heading back upstairs to get prepared for the day.
#chrisbrown#chrisbrownff#chris brown fanfic#jasminesanders#chrisbrownfanfiction#jasminesandersff#teambreezy#teambreezyff#fanfiction#fanfic
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