my moods whilst watching this video

that ivan loves till is the most obvious thing about them

but. does ivan know that…?

the ivan that regards his own feelings as shallow, the ivan that learned how emotions are expressed only from copying others… does he even know that the love he’s felt for so long is love? probably not. and part of the reason is the one he loves himself

because the easiest example he has of love is till's feelings to mizi. till outright calls it love, and ivan watches him so much he has to be aware of this and till’s love to mizi is totally unselfish, right. he doesn’t seem to actually want much from her—just that she's still there and still "mizi"

but ivan can't be satisfied with just watching he… wants. ivan wants till’s attention, till’s affection—

surely this selfish wanting can’t be love

...no wonder he was never able to express his feelings straightforwardly when he belittles them so much but he can’t stand not having anything either, so he does… whatever he does instead to get any scraps of attention he can, from someone he's convinced doesn't care about him at all only showing affection when till can't see it, right until he knows he's going to die

but ivan's feelings for till are all he still has of himself... to think of them as shallow...

I've seen this translated as "I should've been kinder" to him (till) or to her (sua)

but really, the one he should've been kinder to was himself

Thank you all for voting in the poll to decide who was going to be the leader of the band! It turned out to be such a close race!

N2 au Brucey babe!! He really doesnt change much tbh, it's mostly just an outfit change plus his gropes about his brother would be a bit different in that they're extended to all of them and not just JD, theyre just mostly centered around JD.

Cuz from his side he knew all of his brothers were alive at least Floyd, JD, and Branch. He just couldn't leave Vacay island, at first due to fear, and then he started a family there (first kid was accidental).

He'd heard rumors about JD and the others due to JD traveling all over the place and hed sent put the postcard as a way of extending an olive branch and then nobody showed up :/

Also Bruce's outfit change is purely for me I hate drawing his canon vest lmao

Do you like the Hades Game patrochilles story?

I really do! I love what the writers have done with their storyline, it really feels like they studied the source material closely and have handled it with respect. Their take on Achilles was so interesting and refreshing; most people that are even a little bit familiar with the Iliad, when they hear about Achilles, the first thing they think about is "the rage of Achilles" and all the people he killed in Troy. So I can imagine how jarring it must be for someone who doesn't know very much about him to meet Hades Achilles, who is sooo different from his stereotypical portrayal in most media. He is calm, quiet, soft-spoken, bound to his duty and his role as Zagreus' mentor, and he has a close and meaningful relationship with him. And it gets even more interesting the more we learn about him, how hollow he feels, how much he regrets the mistakes he made while living, how much he misses Patroclus and longs for him yet feels too guilty to actually seek him out. Like this might seem simple and straightforward to someone who might have known him through TSOA first or some other adaptation with a sympathetic portrayal, but it’s actually a huge deal when you consider that for decades Achilles was described as an unfeeling, unhinged sociopath who doesn't have real feelings for Patroclus (or anyone) but only acts the way he does because of his wounded ego and pride. It's just such a relief to interact with a version of him written by people who actually get it.

I also really like their version of Patroclus. I just love how snarky he is, and his soliloquiys have brought me to tears several times ngl haha. He's just so sad 😭 so so sad 😭

Also as far as their story itself is concerned, I enjoyed it quite a bit. Even though in the Iliad it's pretty explicit that they both long to be together in the afterlife, the fact that they're apart in Hades and Zagreus has to reunite them didn’t throw me off because.... yeah okay I can see Achilles being eaten up by guilt and choosing to leave Patroclus in Elysium in his stead. I assume the writers just needed a reason to separate them for the narrative's sake, but it makes sense and it works and it's angsty so I have no complaints lol.

idiot~🎃

Honestly I think the most unforgivable crime comitted by the new ATLA adaptation is bringing back the fucking kataang/zutara discourse🥰

Like, I can forgive a lot, but I can't forgive the fact that my own eyes, in the year of our lord 2024, have to be subjected to takes I first saw on 2011 DeviantArt

looking and staring at the fact bloodmoons jealous of lunar being brought back but not him but also disregarding the entirety LUNAR was the one to promise him a body.

I present a very unnecessary analysis of the scaralumi talk before the big fight

First of all I love the way they both can see through each other. I think often times we overlook how good Lumi is at understanding the feelings of others - mostly because Paimon does most of the talking - but here we can see just how good she is at reading him since (I believe) this is the most she has ever talked in a quest. Scara believes he knows what he wants, but Lumi knows what he needs.

I like how he says this because it is true. We have been proven time and time again how Lumi cares about others, which is why despite her being enemies with Scara she can’t help but empathize with his situation.

But she’s not stupid, there’s where it comes the “almost” part. She is saying that as a way to try and stop his plans, not simply because she is worried about him and he knows that, but he still tries to convince her about him being, even though for a moment it almost sounds like he’s trying to convince himself.

Scara then moves on to say how his life has been meaningless up to this point, as if becoming a god is his only purpose and without it he is nothing. So he tried to understand why would Lumi bother going through such “futile errands” of protecting everyone.

But once again Lumi sees through him asking why then would he keep the connection with Haypasia (and consequently with Lumi herself). Even with his answer she is not convinced so he just deflects with his arrogance.

Not to mention how everything he says about Haypasia can also be applied to Lumine, since they both share a connection with him and saw his past. I find it interesting how he was able to sense Lumi and immediately entered her consciousness to observe her

Once again Lumi is able to figure him out and say what she needed to tick him off. He says how bad she is at sewing discord, but he still goes ahead and attacks the fatui calling it an “expression of affection”like he did for Haypasia, putting the two girls on the same wavelength

The qsmp has so many characters involved in multiple ships and pairings and theyre so real for that. Qpr the fuck out of your friends. Romance another two. There are many types of love and all of it is in the air motherfuckers.

oh THAT'S why ivy wasn't surprised to see lucy alive- she just assumed lucy had finally given in and let ankarna resurrect her, and that she was fully on their side again

um so when are they going to play srar & mania for the magic ball

five and klaus in wedding at the end of the world.

some tragic love stories be like: if i could bottle the galaxy, i would pour it into a cup so it would be easier for you to drink. do you want them? do you want the stars? or do they suit you better as adornments for your eyes than glitter on your lips?

but they don’t want the stars. they don’t want the galaxy. but how can they not? is that not enough? (it’s too much, that’s the problem. it’s too much.)

i’m so intrigued by dannyclara despite not shipping them. i think that relationship is an interesting addition to clara’s character arc and i’m still trying to to figure out it’s purpose.